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reddit v Wallstreet

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the real woco

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algorithms program hate

contents editorial whats on? src president state of the union vox pop econ dit rural student voice international student voice sex and the small city LEFT RIGHT CENTRE CLub Spotlight sustanabili-dit

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Articles & creative writing obituary to balcony bar the lack of asian representation and its products reddit v Wallstreet dimweather review: girls can’t surf a univeristy story memoir: the great australian pub biden’s big 4 challenges how algorithms make us hate Stripes. Interview will the real women’s collective please stand up? peter the pancake peddler are you actually an energy-vampire? review: clarice beckett the present moment poem specimen

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editors isobel Moore Stasi kapetanos michelle roylance ivan bucalo design isobel Moore cover art ‘ By tiah BUllock

28 SUBEDITORS GRACE ATTA LAKEISHA WATKINS 30 TOM WOOD 32 MIRCO DI GIACOMO 34 HABIBAH JAGHOORI 36 NGOC LAN TRAN 38 MAYA TLAUKA RORY SPEIRS 40 LIA DEVETZIDIS 42 FINLAY EDWARDS KIRSTY KITTEL 44 TIAH BULLOCK 46 BECK ROWSE GEORGia PENGLIS 50 DEAN PLESA 54 56 60 62 64

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photography by Tiah Bullock @tiahbullock

W

e wish to acknowledge and pay our respects to the Kaurna people and their

elders past, present and future as the traditional custodians of the land on which the University of the Adelaide resides. Their cultural and heritage beliefs flow deep and steady through the land

and burn bright within the Kaurna community to this day.

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Submissions for Issue close April 24th, 11:59 pm 6

For some unknown reason, I started watching cricket during the holidays. I don’t know what possessed me - an underlying masochistic streak perhaps.

Test cricket is a beautiful sport for wasting away the hours. Overs disappear like sands in the hourglass, and before you know it, you’ve spent a whole day watching your team make few wickets, little progress, and learning that the Indian team can take more hits than McGregor before keeling over (Pujara’s performance in the last test is a gruelling lesson in willpower). In other words, test cricket is a perfect metaphor for a semester of uni: intense boredom, punctuated by moments of intense excitement, and not being sure if it will pay off at all.

But we soldier on, and it seems that the early days of this semester have been much more exciting than usual with the appointment of the new Vice-Chancellor. Though our interview with him was too long to fit into these pages, you can find it on our Medium page online. “The Peter Hoj interview” is an essential read for students who want to know what the future of Adelaide Uni looks like.

In these pages, you’ll find a taste of everything; one might say a brief respite from the boredom that is getting back into uni. Emelia Haskey brings us back to the misadventures of her dating life, while Habibah Jaghoori tells us what being at university is really all about (good timing, too, when you might need a refresher after that many years). Poet and visual artist Tiah Bullock gets a feature, while I reflect on my four years working in the purgatory that is the Australian suburban pub.

There’s plenty more inside to get you thinking, to get you excited, and possibly even a little worked up. But as Habibah writes in her thoughtful article, “The student experience is unlike any other, and the growing, unlearning, relearning, shifting, expanding, and realising is done when you put yourself in spaces that force you to question, to respond, to act, and to feel.”

Couldn’t have said it better myself. Without further ado, let’s get stuck into Issue 2.

- Ivan

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18th MARCH Event: NO LONGER ABOUT SILK: Central Asian Countries’ Economic Place in Eurasia

19th March event: Escape With AURHA

time: 1pm-2pm

time: 6pm

host: Central Asian Network in Adelaide

host: Adelaide University Rural Health Alliance

where: Yurt, Maths Lawns, UofA

Fee: $60 drinking, $50 non-drinking

Event: Debating Education Sessions

where: TBD

time: 6pm

whats on?

things to do @ adelaide u

host: Adelaide University Debating Society where: LG21, Lowerground Napier Building, UofA

Event: 2021 Annual General Meeting time: 5pm-6:30PM host: Psychology Students’ Association where: 322 Hughes Building, UofA and ZOOM

20th March event: Thai Festival Volunteering Opportunity time: 9:30AM-7pm

Event: Term 1 Nehru 3v3 Tournament

host: Adelaide University Rotaract Club

time: 6pm-8PM

where: Kings Reserve, Torrensville

host: Adelaide University Debating Society where: Lowerground Napier Building, UofA

event: Newcomers Feast time: 5pm host: College of Blessed Herman The Cripple where: Old UniBar, L4 Union House, UofA

8

24th March event: AUScA’s Semester 1 BBQ time: 10am-3pm host: Adelaide University Sciences Association

Things To Do Adelaide U puts all Adelaide University events in one Facebook group for your convenience. Our creation was inspired by our clubs, who work tirelessly to enrich the UofA student experience for all of us. During this time, we have witnessed how deeply you can be part of the community here, but you can’t engage with what you don’t know about. So when you wonder, “What’s On?”, we hope to be there with all the Things To Do At Adelaide U.

Fee: $5 non members where: TBD

18th-20th MARCH

25th March

Event: Nauryz Celebration event: Term 1 Nehru 3v3 Tournament

time: 11am

time: 6-8pm

host: Central Asian Society in Adelaide

host: Adelaide University Debating Society

where: Maths Lawn, UofA

where: Lowerground Napier Building, UofA

1st April event: Debating Education Sessions

event: Term 1 Nehru 3v3 Tournament

event: The Great Space Debate

time: 6pm

time: 6-8pm

time: 6:30-9pm

host: Adelaide Universi- host: Adelaide University Debating Society ty Debating Society where: LG21, Lowerground Napier Building, UofA

fee: see registration where: Lowerground Napier Building, UofA

host: Adelaide University Space Society fee: free, ticketed where: Braggs Theatre,uofa

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src President

Oscar Zi Shao Ong SRC President

What a fantastic O’Week it has been! I am glad to have met with a lot of you (face to face & virtually) and I trust I will see more of you and the rest in the remainder of the semester. Hope you are settling in university just fine! If you missed O’Week, make sure you head to the AUU and university website (auu. org.au) to familiarise yourself with the important services and support provided to you.

After a fantastic list of achievements last year, I am glad to be able to work with the university to release our third round of $500 International Students Support packages throughout the summer. We acknowledge the struggles our international students face, not being able to go home and not supported by their family (being an international student myself, I feel you too!). I have received lots of concerns around the repatriation pilot program too, but please be reassured that I am continuously advocating and working with university to get you back to SA. Although we are in the post-pandemic in SA, students still face difficult circumstances as they complete their academic responsibilities. This means certain leniency is still needed for those who are struggling when they complete their assessments (i.e. international students which are unable to return home miss their family). I have raised this with the university, and we have now worked out a solution to change the MACA policy where we redefined some of the clauses to ensure you are not disadvantaged.

The FunTea incident in China Town was shocking and shouldn’t be tolerated.

Students’ working rights have always been one of my major focuses, which is why I helped organise work rights webinars last year, and I will continue to work to ensure you are well-informed about your rights. If you require any help/advice about working rights/university policy, head to Student Care on Level 8 of the Hughes Building (studentcare@adelaide.edu.au), one of the great services provided by the AUU! I hear your concerns about the new Vice-Chancellor, Peter Høj, too. I met with him on his third day in office and I am glad he has a heavy focus on the student experience. I am working with him to run a forum where you get to question him on his plans for your studies, research, etc. Get your tough questions ready!

Questions/suggestions about the SRC/university? You are always welcome to email me or send me a message through social media!

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oscarzishao.ong@adelaide.edu.au WeChat ID: oscarong1997

state of the union

Hi all, It was great seeing so many students attending O’Week - how fantastic to have all of you on campus again! As I walked through the Hub this morning, I was surprised but also glad to see it being so vibrant and bubbly. Our campus misses you. Still, please observe social distancing, scan those QR codes, and stay safe in this new normal. Best of luck to those who just started their degree and those who came back for another year (or another degree like me!).

Quick reminder – free breakfast provided by AUU Student Care has started again every Tuesday to Friday, 8:30am – 10:30am, in level 5 Union House!

With grab-and-go fruits, muesli bars, and yoghurts, just bring your student ID and you can enjoy your morning classes with some snacks.

A warm welcome to our offshore and interstate students too – we can’t wait to have you back. The virtual international student welcome was just held on the Friday of O’Week, and we had more than 600 students – definitely a record! It’s great seeing you engaging with your mates, volunteers, university services, and student leaders on the day.

Since last year, the AUU has been dedicated to delivering more virtual events to engage a wider range of students – take the much-loved quarantine Bingo as an example. We also acknowledged that it was very hard for clubs to reach out and host virtual events. As a result, the Clubs Committee has reviewed and updated the grants guideline to provide funding for online events alongside in-person events. This will better support our clubs, which are the critical contributors to our campus culture. These grants are still available, and clubs are encouraged to apply to continue delivering their amazing events to our offshore students.

On a heavier note – you would have received an email recently, inviting you to share your experiences as part of the university’s response to the ICAC investigation. There is a range of engagement options for you to choose, from one-on-one interviews to an anonymous mailbox. I would highly encourage you to share your experience if you feel comfortable, in order to make our university a better space.

Finally, our first AUU Members’ Lunch was on March 3 – one of the many perks you as an AUU member can enjoy! These lunches will be held Wednesdays all over the campus, so follow us on Facebook (Adelaide University Union) or sign up to our newsletter to get on top of the free events happening around the university.

Hope to see you around campus – enjoy the cool and sunny weather. 😊

Angela Qin 2021 AUU President 11

VOX?

pop!

Angus Graham Honours Degree of Bachelor of Environmental Policy and Management 1. When I started studying at Adelaide University, I was able to pair my geography major with a minor in French language studies and participate in the jazz performance arts elective at the same time. Now that I’m embarking on an Honours Degree in Environmental Policy and Management, I’ve had to refine my studies to one field. This has been the greatest change for me!

2. I’m a huge Womad fan so I’m definitely look-

Imogen Tonkin Bachelor of Laws and Bachelor of Arts 1. The deep dish pizza place in the Hub shut down. Sad cause I miss my late afternoon pizza/study sessions :(

ing forward to that. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to fork out the cash to go this year though knowing that the experience may not be as exciting because of COVID-19.

2. A law ball that we can actually stand up and dance at, and (I’m ashamed to admit this) my first ever pub crawl.

3. The evening vibe around the CBD. Some

3. Definitely performing and getting to

years I may not drop in to see a show, but I still love wandering through Rundle St to enjoy the buzz.

4. Definitely in person. I was much more pro-

4. In person!

12

support my friends by going their shows.

ductive during online learning but also a hell of a lot sadder.

1.

What’s one thing that’s changed at uni since you first started and

how do you feel about it?

2.

Any events coming up that you’re looking forward to?

3.

What’s your favourite thing about Fringe season?

4.

Do you prefer online or in person classes?

Taylor Bachelor of Media (Journalism)/Bachelor of Arts (Advanced) 1. The General have upped their snack game since I Nic Rich Bachelor of Laws 1. In my first year I’d never tried coffee

and thought the taste was disgusting. I am now totally dependent on it.

2. All AULSS events!

3. The food!

4. In person. It’s much more fun to procrastinate with your friends.

started uni and they now stock Allen’s Oak Flavoured Milk Bottles… so yeah, you could say that I’m feeling pretty good.

2. I’m going on a silent disco walking tour with my sisters very soon which I am way too excited for. Also, many of my friends are having their 21st birthdays in the next couple of months, and I am so happy to finally be able to party with them!

3. The whole atmosphere at the Garden is so magical!

I love going to watch theatre or comedy shows during the week, which are fairly inexpensive too.

4. In-person, of course, though there are still obvious benefits to online classes (like the lack of commute time!).

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econ dit

The Recession Pink Recession The Pink

2020 was one of the most difficult years we have experienced, with COVID-19 drastically changing the way we live. what was particularly Lockdowns and social distancing restric- distressing about [the pantions reduced face-to-face interactions demic] was the disproporwith friends and family. Lectures and tionate impact it had on tutorials moved online, making studying women, and young women as difficult as it has ever been. This was especially.” paired with the economic and financial uncertainty involved with many people losing their jobs or having their hours of work reduced.

Employment

Words By Mahya Panahkhahi, Adelaide University Economics Club

“

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With all the unpredictability that the pandemic brought, in 2020 Australia went into a recession for the first time in nearly three decades. What was particularly distressing about this was the disproportionate impact it had on women, and young women especially.

Female-dominated industries like retail, hospitality, and tourism were impacted the most from shutdowns and restrictions, causing many women to lose their jobs, some temporarily and some permanently. Unfortunately, women have not just suffered economically. Their unpaid domestic work has significantly increased. More women are dropping out of university, they have been at higher risk of contracting COVID-19, and domestic violence cases have also increased. Due to these factors, many economists have called the recession caused by COVID-19 a ‘pink recession’ or a ‘she-cession’.

Data from the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS) shows that between February and June 2020, around 5.7% of women lost their jobs compared to 4.7% of men. Employment data from the ABS shows shocking numbers for South Australia between March and December 2020, with an increase of 1% in the number of men employed (which is roughly around 7,700 men) compared to a decrease of 1.8% in the number of women employed (around 12,000 women).

There are many possible reasons behind this difference in loss of employment.

For instance, female-dominated industries were hit the hardest by COVID-related restrictions. At different points in time, shops, cafes and restaurants were either shut down or had to operate with various restrictions, requiring fewer staff. The tourism industry was also hit hard as travel restrictions were put in place. These circumstances, along with the fact that women are more likely to be employed in part-time and casual positions, has resulted in the impact of COVID-19 having been of greater economic detriment, in general, for women.

Casual jobs are more insecure as their

flexible nature gives employers more power in relation to hours and dismissals.

In the wake of the pandemic, many casual employees lost their job as they did not qualify for the JobKeeper payment and their employers felt it was not economically viable to keep them. It is clear that many women have been disadvantaged during the pandemic purely because of the types of jobs they hold and the industries that they dominate in.

Unpaid work

Not only have women suffered more in terms of employment, but their unpaid domestic work has also significantly increased. This includes things like cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children, the elderly, or ill family members. Whilst spending more time at home has increased the domestic work of both men and women, this increase has been disproportionately greater for women. As you can imagine, in a family where the man has a stable full-time job and the woman has a part-time or casual job, it will almost always be the woman who will have to give up their position to take care of things in their household, when, for example, there are school closures resulting in students having to study from home. Despite this, there has been a notable absence of support for the unpaid work undertaken by women in any stimulus packages introduced by state or federal governments.

Education

Data from the Workplace Gender Equality Agency also suggests that there was a greater decrease in tertiary education enrolments by women than men, which raises concerns about the future. Women should not have to drop out of university because they feel pressured to take care of things at home, or because they feel discouraged about the prospects of being able to find stable, well-paying jobs after they have completed their education.

This has unfortunately been a legitimate

fear for many young women, particularly after seeing or experiencing the economic repercussions of COVID-19.

Health

Women have been more at risk of contracting COVID-19 due to making up a greater proportion of roles in essential services, particularly health and education.

Women’s safety at home also became compromised, with research by the Australian Institute of Criminology (AIC) showing that 4.6% of women reported having experienced domestic violence between February and May 2020. With people spending more time at home and generally being more stressed and anxious, AIC reported that around 33% of the women they surveyed were experiencing domestic violence for the first time, and half of those with previous experiences of domestic violence reported that it had gotten worse since the pandemic.

What is important to realise, albeit very upsetting, is that there was already a gap in employment, wages, superannuation, and unpaid domestic work between women and men before COVID-19. Issues that were already present pre COVID-19, like a lack of secure employment for women, and adequate precautions and support systems to combat domestic violence, have just been exacerbated by the pandemic.

In the words of Antonio Guterres, the UN Secretary General, ‘gender equality and women’s rights are essential to getting through this pandemic…and to building a better future for everyone’. It is now more important than ever to acknowledge the existence of these issues and attempt to combat them, one step at a time, so that gender equality becomes a reality, not just a dream.

15 15

Rural Student Voice

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Moving to University was hard. There’s no point in sugar-coating it. On my first day, I was a bundle of nervous excitement coupled with an unhealthy amount of self-doubt. I listened to the advice to join clubs, but still didn’t really know if I’d found my place. Sitting in my first few classes, it felt as though everyone else had known each other for years and somehow, I’d missed the boat. I wondered if it was because I wasn’t from the city, or I hadn’t tried hard enough during O’Week, or maybe it was just my resting bitch face. In addition to the mounting social anxiety, I was learning how to live on my own, which came with its own struggles. I was learning how to budget, keep on top of bills, and run a household. I was totally in the deep end. Of all the people I met, not one was in a similar position – they were all still able to live with their parents – and this was completely alienating. The

cherry on the top of all of this was that I was a complete fish out of water, and honestly felt lost every time I walked out of my front door. Orienting myself in an entire city, and not just a small town like back home, seemed like an impossible task.

I’m sure if you’ve made it this far, you’re probably thinking, “Wow – what a negative sack of shit.” Relax, things did get better. I’m so glad I made the move and here’s why. First, the relationship with my parents has completely changed. I’m now able to lean on them and seriously appreciate their advice.

Calling them my friends would definitely still be a stretch; they love to come and visit and lecture me on the state of my room! Secondly, I’m so proud of myself.

I’ve come a long way and the feeling of independence is really gratifying.

Sure – there have been heaps of mis-

By now you’ve already heard 101 tips on how to get the most out of Uni, so I’m not going to start shoving any of that down your throats, but hopefully in sharing my experience I’ve either helped a fellow rural student feel less alone, or introduced a city slicker to a different perspective. Regardless, if at the moment you feel like the negatives are outweighing the positives, reach out, to friends, to family, to university staff, or to me. I’m always up for a chat!

WORDS BY Baie Perryman, Student Representative Council Rural Officer

takes along the way (yes, I accidentally left my oven on for a whole day and could’ve burnt down my house, twice) but I’ve learnt from these mistakes. Third, because I’m now so far from my family, I value my friends so much more – they’ve become my replacement family and I am so grateful for their love and support.

Finally, I’ve learnt so much about myself and learned that I really enjoy my own company. Seriously – we should all spend some time getting to know ourselves better.

17 17

international Student voice

you can’t earn a degree you can’t earn a you can’t earn a degree degree if you’re dead if if you’re you’re dead dead Healthcare’s complicated. International student healthcare, even more so. But then again, IKEA manuals are complicated to me. Operating a coffee machine would take me four academic years and $160 K, which is why I use instant. I’m not the brightest banana of the bunch, as much as I like to pretend I am, and I don’t know the first thing about health insurance, or taxes, or adulting in general.

I’m not ashamed to admit that – well, maybe a little. Yes, I’ll learn it all firsthand eventually, but that’s a problem for future me, the future not-20-anymore me who’s finally moved out the house and escaped the clutches of her over-protective parents.

WORDS BY N Y

It surprises people when I say I’ve been living with my parents here in Adelaide for 9+ years, but I’m not a citizen yet.

My obsession with saving money has translated to a complete and utter envy of the virtually free healthcare and HECS-HELP that Aussies get here. Was starting an Adelaide STEM degree as a non-permanent resident a regret of mine? No comment. Still, I acknowledge the undeniable truth that I am more fortunate than most other international (read: full fee-paying) students, in that I don’t really have to worry about managing private insurance quite yet (thanks, mum and dad!). And so, if you are the me from mid-February 2021, almost losing my left ovary was not that big of a deal. And here we start our runof-the-mill tale with a beginning, middle, and end. Content warning for TMI and

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medical BS. Sunday 9:45 AM: our protagonist is rushing to the loo with a dull constant pain in her left abdomen. Nothing’s coming out, but the urge is there, so she gives up and gets up. She makes it three steps out before needing to heave her non-existent breakfast. She gets up again, she vomits again. Sensing a pattern, she crawls to the carpeted corridor and calls for help. “It sounds like a kidney stone,” says Dad. So, they wait it out. Writhing in pain on the floor is a great look for her.

Sunday 2:30 PM: the pharmacy closes at 5. Mum’s back from church and she calls the home doctor service. It takes 45 minutes to get a hold of one, and it’s 45 goddamn dollars to just talk to one, because health insurance. “From what I’m hearing, it probably is a kidney stone,” says Dr. Phone Doctor. All our protagonist is hoping for is a painkiller prescription; ibuprofen and paracetamol haven’t been cutting it. All she gets is the promise of one. “I’ll send the prescription over to [insert pharmacy here] at [insert suburb] here.” It never comes. The pharmacy doesn’t get the prescription, and the protagonist doesn’t get her pills. 45 goddamn dollars down the drain.

It’s pretty dark out now. Time is an illusion. Our protagonist’s parents call a health hotline. They agree that she should probably go to the emergency room. Surprise, it’s an ovarian cyst!

“

Not everyone has the luxury of living with family or close friends who can take care of them if an emergency ever arises.”

The story’s climax is a blur, thanks to the anaesthesia. At least the operation’s a complete success, judging by the big grin on Dr. Surgeon’s face. “Massive, like a tennis ball,” mimics Mum, disturbed but mostly amused by Dr. Surgeon and her titillating fascination with dermoid cysts (don’t search that up if you have a weak stomach).

The post-surgery Monday is not all puppies and butterflies for our protagonist, but at least she’s out by Tuesday. “It’s odd walking out of a hospital without having to pay anything,” says Dad. A pleasant surprise to the ears, indeed. End poorly-told story.

If it wasn’t for that misstep by Dr. Phone Doctor, I’d have one less organ. I’m still pissed about that $45 we wasted, but life is full of regrets and at least I’m healthy now. I regret buying so many crop tops that I can’t wear until my scars heal. I regret starting uni so early. And I regret not ever seeing a GP.

Domestic and internationals students alike need to find their safety net. Not everyone has the luxury of living with family or close friends who can take care of them if an emergency ever arises, so let’s encourage each other to take health seriously and not treat it as a taboo, TMI subject. Go to a GP at least once every three years. If you are sexually active, go to a gynaecologist or urologist. Just listen to your body.

Thank you to Imogen, Taylor, Amber, and Tracy from Modbury, paramedics Tom & Mel, and Cody, Hannah, Beth, Stuart, Dr. Waterfall, Stephanie, Sandy, Ernie, Laurinda, Mayya, and Cat from Lyell McEwin. I have definitely missed and misspelled a few name in this list, but they know who they are and they know they’ve made a difference.

Mum says the women in her side of the family have high pain tolerance, which is probably not true to the degree she envisions. I still have mixed feelings about how my family and I handled that fated Sunday, relying on good old-fashioned cure-alls like Tiger Balm and toxically-romanticised Filipino resilience. And I know a lot of other international students might have this sort of attitude. So yes, having surgery and telling people to take their health seriously has pretty much been my sole personality trait for the past few weeks. Sue me.

19

Sex and the (Small) City

Settling is is an an STI STI Settling

WORDS BY emelia haskey

I don’t do new year’s resolutions for the same reason I don’t ever delete my online dating profiles entirely – sheer lack of willpower. Last year wasn’t a highlight for anyone, so a fresh start and preferably an end to the global pandemic would be a real palette cleanser. But if it’s been a rocky year for you already, don’t fear. I woke up on New Year’s Day in a tent wearing a prairie dress looking like a dishevelled Helen Reddy.

Life could be worse.

2020

However, if we are going to make a commitment to anything this year it should be to ourselves. No, I am not advocating you start buying into the self-care industry and start indulging in morning yoga classes and using the word “wellness” unironically. I mean commit to putting yourself first in the one sphere we seem to all put ourself last in: dating. We’ve all made a trip to the local free checkup clinic which, for some reason always looks like an abandoned building in a zombie apocalypse film (complete with slow moving bodies making no eye contact). If you were lucky enough to experience the joys of a high school sex-ed class, you know how to put a condom on a banana and the best way to avoid catching something nasty. We know about most STIs. But we seem to forget about the most contagious disease of all – settling. It jumps quickly from person to person, can

be transmitted through very boring intercourse, unnecessary second dates, and without treatment can be fatal to your love life.

Sometimes, I can’t help but think that a long relationship must be a healthy one, or that if my next date doesn’t work out that I should go full Sound of Music and join a nunnery (Captain Von Trapp is not coming for me as he’s 91 and recently deceased). Being single is regularly very depressing, especially if everyone else seems to be enjoying romantic bliss. The temptation to keep going out with someone who you only tolerate out of fear of being alone is much greater than it first appears. It’s complicated. Even if it seems like someone isn’t what we want, something is better than nothing, right? It got me wondering…why are we settling for less rather than waiting for more?

Not all cases of settling are obvious.

I desperately adored Mr Big when we first started going out with all the blind love of teenage romance.

He was absolutely perfect in every way, so gorgeous, so brooding and temperamental. It was all very Shakespearian. My lovestruck brain brushed over how he never took me on dates, wouldn’t meet my friends, and had a growing collection of empty bottles on his wardrobe. But Hamlet is not a great boyfriend, and

“

The temptation to keep going out with someone who you only tolerate out of fear of being alone is much greater than it first appears.” needless to say, he dumped me.

Though at the time I was devastated, I eventually realised I had settled for less than I deserved.

There’s always a bright side though. The best thing about having an alcoholic ex is that I know a lot of great bars!

mandatory application forms for any potential suitors looking to woo me, and avoiding tents.

A friend of mine used to go on first date about twice a week. Rain, wind or shine, nothing was going to stop her meeting a mediocre man for a coffee date he would make her pay for. Like Carrie Bradshaw before her she was an intrepid serial dater, caring less about quality and more about company. This worked great in the short term. But instant gratification unfortunately only lasts so long, and some of the men she settled for were seriously lacking not only in personality, but in respect for her as well. Sometimes it’s better to be alone than stuck in a lacklustre dating hell.

My final words of wisdom? Your friends are your soulmates, and they’ll be the ones who’ll be with you through every dating catastrophe, breakthrough, and disappointment. I’ll be putting myself first this year by implementing

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LEFT CENTRE

RIGHT

TRIGGER WARNING: SExual Assualt and rape

1. What should we make of Facebook’s news ban, including the removal of On Dit’s page among others and the Australian media bargaining code?

2. How has the person accused of raping Brittany Higgins nearly 2 years ago gone on to be accused of sexually assaulting another woman? How do you feel about the Government’s handling of the case?

3. Given recent Cabinet reshuffles, factional conflict, poor polling projections (in New South Wales in particular) and a generally low approval rating relative to Scott Morrison, is Anthony Albanese really the right person to lead the Labor Party right now?

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LEFT: Socialist Alternative

barriers to be safe at work.

1.

Facebook’s news ban is nothing more than a turf war between a tech giant and Australia’s corporate media.

Both sides are equally reprehensible.

Corporate media outlets like the Murdoch press and 7News are demanding more money to spout right-wing propaganda. Facebook, to avoid paying, is willing to shut down access to media content. It’s shocking that these corporations hold totally undemocratic and unaccountable monopolies over what should be public services. The implications for free speech on Facebook are scary. Media giants are willing and able to suppress content that doesn’t suit their corporate agenda.

3.

There is no ‘right person’ to lead Labor, a party completely unwilling to provide genuine opposition to the Liberals. Labor has trailed behind the abhorrent Morrison Government, which is completely beholden to fossil fuel industries. Albanese, the leader of Labor’s supposed ‘Left’ faction, has shifted the party further to the right. Under his leadership, Labor has abandoned its already weak emissions targets and measures to reduce inequality. When asked about the Government’s JobKeeper scheme, his biggest criticism was that workers were receiving too much money. No leader of Labor, a party loyal to Australian capitalism, is going to advocate for the masses.

We need a genuine socialist left to fight the Liberals.

2.

At least four women have come forward accusing a high-ranking Liberal staffer of rape. The Government’s response has been effectively to cover up a serial rapist. It’s impossible to imagine that the Prime Minister’s office was unaware of this. All evidence indicates that they sat on the allegations and blackmailed victims into not coming forward, not wanting to lose a ‘rising star’ in their ranks or risk defeat in the upcoming Federal Election. Put simply, the rich and powerful protect their own. What a total indictment on the sexist culture permeating elite politics. It’s shameful that so many women workers face countless

CENTRE: Labor Club 1.

This is essentially a proxy war between two billionaires: Rupert Murdoch and Mark Zuckerberg. Scott Morrison picked Murdoch, as he always does, and Zuckerberg’s retribution was swift and without mercy. In the battle between old and new media, it is disgraceful that On Dit’s page and other independent and dynamic media sources were removed. On Dit is based and long may it remain so. Also, read The Hilarian.

2.

First thing’s first, I stand in solidarity with Brittany Higgins and the other survivors who have taken a stand against this abhorrent perpetrator of both sexual violence and abuse of power. Scott Morrison and the Liberal Government need to conduct a comprehensive inquiry into the matter and into the culture of Parliament House in general.

3. Anthony Albanese has been a fighter all his life. Raised by a single mother in a Housing Commission house, he organised on campus to stand up against both Tories and Trots. I don’t think we’ve seen him at his full potential.

Furthermore, New South Wales is only one state. Victoria has more seats. Dan Andrews is smashing it. McGowan is smashing it in WA. Labor is resurgent in Queensland. This is an Australian Federal Election, not a New South Wales State Election, and I would think Albo would run his campaign accordingly.

RIGHT: Liberal Club 1.

Facebook putting a news ban on the entirety of Australia was completely the wrong thing to do. The Government is rightly ensuring that news organisations are fairly compensated for the content being shared on the Facebook platform. The reaction from Facebook was completely unjustified as well as dangerous, considering many pages completely unrelated to news providers (such as SA Health, fire information pages and politicians’ pages) were removed. This is particularly important during a pandemic and Australian summer respectively. A large number of people, especially younger people, rely on what Facebook shares from the news websites that they read to see the news of the day and thus it especially affected university students.

against another. It is incredibly concerning that Brittany Higgins was raped in Parliament House – the centre of our democracy. The Prime Minister was right to say that the culture in Parliament House is vile and certainly needs to be fixed so that all people feel safe at work. The AULC welcomes the fact the PM has launched an investigation into the culture of Parliament House. To the people in the comment sections of news articles about this who said things along the lines of “Well, she shouldn’t have been drunk in Parliament House,” that is despicable. The only person to blame for this disgusting act is the man in question, who should be prosecuted and sent to prison for his abhorrent crimes.

3.

The Federal Labor Party is in absolute shambles as it has been for years. The Labor Party went into the 2019 Election with an off-putting air of arrogance which turned away voters and cost Bill Shorten the leadership of the party. Albeit, he did announce his own resignation as leader and wasn’t rolled. The problem here is that because the party was so sure that Shorten would be PM, they didn’t really have a plan for what to do if he lost. Is he the right person to lead the Labor Party?

I don’t know – who are you going to replace him with? He’s just as useless as the next person, whoever that may be.

2.

Sex crimes are among the most vile crimes any person can commit

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CLUB SPOTLIGHT

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Adelaide University Comedy Club

WORDS BY Naomi Williams

Adelaide University Comedy Club Adelaide University Comedy Club

What inspired you to start it?

I wanted to be in a club where people could watch comedy and practise their comedy acts together, so I decided to make one. There was a standup workshop with Lori Bell at Adelaide Uni, so I went to the show and asked the participants to make a comedy club with me and some others. Also, my friend Stella kept asking me how the club idea was coming along until I finally did it. She started the Women’s Collective, so she’s a real inspiration.

Why should people join the Comedy Club?

If you want to have fun, meet new people and try comedy, this club is for you! Even if you think you’re not funny, everyone can learn and that’s why we have games and exercises to help people release their inner comic. We have so many ideas about what we can do this semester, from stand-up to improv, to sketches, comedy writing and more! The sky’s the limit!

What events can we expect to see from the Comedy Club in Semester 1?

We run a weekly meetup from 4-6pm in the Hartley club’s lounge where we do comedy games/exercises and perform

to each other. We will run a stand-up comedy workshop this semester and we aim to put on a show. We also will go monthly to comedy open mic nights so people can watch or participate.

Who inspires you? Who are your favourite comedians?

I like Phoebe Waller-Bridge who wrote and starred in Fleabag, and James Acaster.

Final Thoughts?

Have a go because you never know.

“If you want to have fun, meet new people and try comedy, this club is for you!”

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sustainabili-dit

Let’s Let’s Talk Talk About: About: Sustainability Sustainability and and Culture Culture

Has sustainability become white-washed? Is there room for more than just aesthetic eco-branding? Should we all just aspire to become zero-waste vegans?

WORDS BY Ingrid Mowbray

The face of the sustainability movement has become crowded with images of keep cups, compost bins and metal straws. I confess that in the past few years I have focused on making these switches and encouraged those around me to do the same. While there is nothing inherently wrong with inching closer to being waste free (do keep using your metal straw!). The sustainability space appears tunnel visioned when it comes to this, compared to the need to appreciate the intersectionality of other cultures and the environment.

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We can learn a lot more about sustainable practices through observing other cultures— look… our plastic free inventions are great, but these alternatives have existed elsewhere and have survived our high consumption society (but let’s save the conversation of capitalism and sustainability for another time).

More importantly, I want to highlight our need to understand the choices that some consider to be ‘killing the planet’ but are also significant cultural practices.

But what do I mean? I understand the power of examples, so bear with me!

My very cutting-edge story: in a rural village in China, a man catches a fish to feed his family of five for the Lunar New Year. He recreates a traditional recipe, which involves dousing the fried fish with brown vinegar, garlic and

sugar (these may be ingredients I have stolen from my mum). Should we tell this family to go vegan? Perhaps your answer would be different if I described how the man didn’t catch his fish, but instead bought the fish from Woolies.

The point I’m making isn’t that only one of these men deserve to eat fish and the other does not. It’s about perspective— along with cultural, environmental and socio-economic factors that are important to reflect upon. However, I hope it’s recognised that in the former example sustainable fishing can exist, but the latter involves sourcing from commercial fishing—which is damaging to ocean habitats and unsustainable for the planet.

Did you know that commercial fishing operations sometimes use a technique called ‘bottom trawling’ to catch things living on the seafloor (like shrimp and scallops), which scientists say are similar to the destruction caused by cutting forests? You may be more familiar with the concept of ‘bycatch’, which occurs when unintended species such as sharks or turtles are caught in the longline fishing technique. But enough with the facts…these points can be found via some research on Google.

To bring to life my point on sustainability and culture, it is within the culture of the Inuit people (an arctic indigenous population) to hunt seals for food and

clothing. It is easy for people to jump on to this with anger and sadness—would your reaction be the same for cows and leather? Perhaps you have the same reaction and you’re equally unsupportive, but I encourage research and understanding that sustainability does not equate to everyone going vegan or using metal straws. Sustainability, however, does involve the discussion into whether seals are being hunted on such a scale that the seal population cannot sustain itself and there is a negative impact on ecosystems. There are important cultural traditions that have to be acknowledged—and quite often these practices are small contributors in comparison to the effects of mass scale businesses which expel fossil fuels and pollution.

On the topic of pollution… plastic… a very significant problem. I was somewhat inspired to speak on the theme of culture in sustainability by my grandmother who lives in China. I last visited her in the start of 2019 (ahh, pre-COVID times) and noticed that she still had plastic bags from the likes of ‘BI-LO’ and ‘Best & Less’—places which are either closed or my family haven’t shopped in for over a decade. It dawned on me that she had kept these bags for years and had just re-used them. I also noticed a familiar purple pencil case—the type I used in primary school where you can slide in letters to spell your name. The letters spelt ‘Ingrid’. She had kept it and made use of it over the years after I grew out of that pencil case (I moved on to Smiggle— we love that 2011 hype).

While it isn’t ingrained in the Chinese culture to reuse plastic bags or items, this is a familiar pattern that can be observed in non-Western cultures. But I also know that my grandma probably isn’t thinking about the turtles when she reuses these plastics. Money saving strategy? Durable bag quality? Sentimental sensitivity? Regardless of her motive, she unintentionally has played a part in helping the environment.

Over in Japan, there is the art of ‘kintsugi’ that repairs broken objects (such as a bowl or teapot) with gold. So instead of throwing away the broken object it receives a ‘new life’ (a wonderful approach to reducing waste).

Sustainability has turned into an aesthetic showdown, and I dare say a little white-washed. There is room to learn from other cultures. We are too concerned with the perfect snapshot of our Hydro Flask that even if we had an old plastic drink bottle that had more years of good use, it is replaced with a cool alternative. I want to emphasise that you shouldn’t feel guilty owning a ‘less eco alternative’, especially if it can still serve its purpose (there’s also nothing wrong with washing and re-using a plastic zip lock bag). Of course, if there is an opportunity to buy an eco-friendly alternative – go for it! But don’t forget the items you have at home that shouldn’t always be thrown away and replaced if it still serves its purpose. While I commend those groovy bloggers/youtubers who can fit a whole year’s waste in a jar (still struggling to understand how), this path is not for everyone – once again there are cultural, environmental, and socio-economic factors that are important to think about. But if you are in the position to minimise your environmental impact, definitely go for it.

Sustainable practices are weaved into many cultures, but there are also traditions that can be perceived as harmful to the environment. Balance, an open mind, and some good old research is much needed in the sustainability space—both as a way to learn from different cultures and to pause and think before a disagreement. We can all discover new and exciting ways to become more sustainable across our planet… but this is challenging without expanding our cultural understanding and adopting a cosmopolitan attitude.

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WORDS BY MAXim BUCKLEY

WORDS BY LAKEISHA WATKINS

Obituary to Balcony Bar

Balcony Bar, I wish I knew where you now Balcony are Legends think that they can replace you, but will they truly raise the bar to the level of a balcony, bar?

I only visited you once, but just once was enough to truly experience the Balcony Bar Your black curtains blocking out the summer sun; your strangely shaped pints sporting logos of foreign beers; your reasonably priced drinks dripping with reasonably priced condensation; your portable swampy air conditioner that needs to be filled with water every 10 minutes; you made me and my friends feel like tsars, Balcony Bar. Even your toilets were quirky, missing the faucets, now just scars on the Balcony Bar Balcony toilet…bar.

I wish you didn’t have to go so far away in my memory, Balcony Bar. But unfortunately all superstars must fall, and Balcony Bar you are just the same.

So let’s raise one last jar (of beer) to our good friend, Balcony Bar.

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The lack of Asian representation and its products pure ignorance, identity issues, and blatant racism In a world so largely influenced by mainstream media, it is distressing to see that Asian people are still lacking proper representation in the Western world.

Disturbingly, it seems that acts of violent hate crimes appear to be our wake-up call in recognising this lack of representation and its problematic products.

There is no denying that our society is fixated on appearance and aesthetics.

Our identities are still strongly tied down to the way we look. I am a half Asian/ half Caucasian woman. Being “mixed” is confusing at times, and I often feel conflicted between my identity and appearance.

Despite belonging to two cultures there is this figurative predisposition that one must be the foundation for my looks and personality. I feel this perception being projected through comments from friends and strangers. Coupled with the fact that I barely exist within mainstream media, I face an inner battle regarding opposing beauty standards and my own demeanour. However, I do know for a fact that I am not a “whitewashed Asian girl” nor am I “white with small eyes”.

Despite my struggles with identity, I always knew I had it somewhat easier than a person of full Asian ethnicity. I remember moments where I subconsciously felt the comfort of white privilege and that I was ‘lucky’ to be Caucasian. Times when I saw my friends go through the “I wish I was white” phase. Or when I was commended by a teacher for being welcoming to a group of Chinese international students who were being completely disregarded. When I replied to their praise with the fact that I was Chinese myself, they informed me with a smile “that you couldn’t tell”.

With the mention of a ‘lack’, it suggests

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that there is some level of Asian representation in existence. This is true, however, in the majority of mainstream media only Asian stereotypes and ideals are perpetuated. When Hollywood realised how profitable diversity can be, we saw a slight rise in films featuring Asian actors. One being the infamous 2018 film Crazy Rich Asians starring an all-Asian cast. This movie was praised for providing a platform for Asian actors and deemed powerful in overcoming certain stereotypes, such as the emasculation and desexualisation of Asian men.

However, as the title of the film states, it is about the “crazy rich”; a demographic that most Asian people do not resonate with. Yet again in 2021, we have seen the arrival of a new reality TV show, named Bling Empire, which follows the lives of a clique of “wildly wealthy” LA Asian socialites. This form of representation is problematic as it fuels a false perception that Asian people are almost exempt from discrimination due to their wealth.

Not only do these examples of media representation just exhibit the 1%, they also forget to mention the immense equity gap that occurs within Asia and Asian communities in Western countries.

Growing up, I became aware of the derogatory labels and microaggressions perpetrated towards Asian people. I witnessed my Asian mother experience bouts of both explicit and casual racism.

This racism is exacerbated by a lack of representation; it births xenophobia, peripheralization and stigmatisation.

Without stories of our own, we are subjugated to stereotypes. Racism crawls into peoples’ minds, and blurs their visions so that they struggle to see us outside the confines of those stereotypes.

Around the time COVID-19 arrived in

“racism is exacerbated by a lack of representaAustralia, I was told a story of how a person visited their GP in fears that they might have contracted the virus solely based on the fact they had walked past an Asian person. I remember finding the notion that someone could be so ignorant and blatantly racist almost unbelievable. Unfortunately, the recent surge in hate crimes against Asian people in America demonstrates that these anti-Asian views are ever- present in Western societies. In 2021, more news articles have surfaced describing horrific video footage and recounts of violent attacks against Asian people, specifically elders, paired with telling statistics such as the fact “2,808 reports of anti-Asian discrimination [were recorded] between March 19 and December 31, 2020” by the organisation Stop AAPI Hate (Time, 2021). These increasing figures can certainly be attributed to the xenophobic comments and anti-Asian rhetoric exclaimed by a particular former US President, which in turn tied a global pandemic to a race. It would be ignorant to not acknowledge that the lack of fair representation of Asian people does encourage bigotry.

Moving forward, difficult discussions need to be had within our communities to confront stereotypes and stigmas surrounding Asian people that have freely existed and evolved without question. Ideally, mainstream media should include Asian people and their stories without being seen as a nuance, but rather as the representation of our diverse reality.

WORDS BY emily tattersall

tion; it births xenophobia, peripheralization and stigmatisation. Without stories of our own, we are subjugated to stereotypes.”

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Reddit vs Wall Street

The Modern Age of Class Battles Earlier in January, the digital Colosseum saw social networking platform Reddit battle against hedge funds; a battle that has been a long time coming. For decades, the aftershock of the GFC has coloured lower and middle-class citizens’ views of Wall Street investors and their sharkish ways. Investors have long been making profit at the expense of others. Whilst they rake in millions, the lower classes struggle against job loss, debt, homelessness and countless more devastating hardships.

From 2007-2009, the United States was choked by a grim fog, destroying the lives of countless people. The stock market collapsed in on itself causing a massive recession, bringing ruin to the country.

Unemployment surged, causing people to lose their homes and incomes. With it, their livelihoods vanished into thin air.

Those played for fools were the lower and middle class, and the bitterness still lingers. But how did they not see the rug being pulled from under their feet? During a housing boom, mortgages were approved for people with poor credit history. Loans were being given out to people despite their inability to pay them off. This made for some shoddy returns. House prices were driven up, steering investors away from the market and causing stock prices to depress, leading to devastating financial loss. When house prices did eventually fall, many were burdened with mortgages higher than their home’s worth. The Federal Reserve’s lack of regulations on the financial sector further pressured the country. When debts grew and mortgages faulted, banks considered “too big to fail” struggled to recover, requiring bail outs.

All of this was the doing of Wall Street scamming everyday people, completely despoiling them of their trust and robbing them blind. Fourteen years on and the resentment is still deep, growing evermore with the high cost of living and the never-ending debt many in the United States

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must contend with. It should be of no surprise that when the opportunity arose, those wronged served Wall Street their just desserts on a shiny, silver GameStopsized platter.

The hedge funds, much like those they cheated in the past, weren’t prepared for what happened with GameStop, an electronics retail company. They were betting against the gaming company, hoping to turn a profit at the business’ expense.

They borrowed GameStop shares and sold them to others in the hopes they could buy them back later for less and keep the difference, a process known as shorting. But Reddit users smelt the blood in the water before the sharks could, and they decided to take action, setting forward an unprecedented chain of events.

Reddit banded together an army that wreaked havoc on the share market by driving prices up, which is exactly the opposite of what Wall Street wanted. It hoped to make GameStop’s loss its gain, but the blind side happened with such speed and ferocity that those who had hoped for GameStop’s share price to plummet called for government intervention. Yet they were left dry as political representatives turned against them. It was a battle that was fought in a completely online space. Hedge funders were oblivious to the potential social media held for spurring people against them.

Throughout history, social uprisings against injustice and wrongdoing have been frequent. From revolutions, to wars, to protests, this GameStop incident is but another rise to action. What sets it apart from earlier events is the realm in which it has been fought. The ABC reported that GameStop only had 65 million shares (as of January 21st) which were bought and sold 650 million times in a period of four days during the debacle. At its peak, on

“Reddit users smelt

the blood in the water before the sharks could, and they decided to take action, setting forward an unprecedented chain of events.”

In the years since its conception, social media has been a formidable tool for inciting mass action. The GameStop fiasco is just the most recent event. Social media played a crucial role in the Egyptian Revolution, the Black Lives Matter movement, and the Capitol Riots among other decade-defining events. In the case of GameStop, it was used to outmanoeuvre the hedge funds in their own game. Word broke out across all social media platforms of the plan to surge GameStop’s share price. This cross-platform pollination encouraged more people to join, furthering the downfall of the hedge funds.

Social media allows instant communication on a global scale, overcoming geographical boundaries and time delays that earlier communication networks faced. On Reddit, one person alone was able to share a pattern they had noticed on the stock market and counteract it. In little time the plan had reached Twitter, Facebook and many more platforms, helping to bring in more people and raise awareness of what was going on.

However, the power of social media is causing growing concern. It presents dangers, much like the violence seen in

the Capitol Riots and organised through apps like Parler. But it also proves itself a valuable tool to those who demand justice. With the high costs of living and the ever-increasing earnings of billionaires who exploit lower classes, the fight back was inevitable. Especially when it was as easy as investing a few dollars into stocks through a phone app. The internet offers ease of access to information and communication, giving power to the masses, no doubt the likes of which we will see again very soon.

With the restrictions the Robinhood app forced on Reddit investors, many called for a class action. All eyes were watching, including the US Government, who called for hearings on the incident. Robinhood was unprepared for what happened on their app.

They imposed trading restrictions on GameStop stock. Yet they were forced to undo this after backlash from investors and politicians. This incident with GameStop has driven home a point: even if those who invested lost, the memory of the event still holds firm. Pushback from the exploited is inevitable and is occurring in ways

words by lakeisha watkins

January 28th, share prices for the gaming company were at $US483 per share, leaving many rich beyond their imaginations. Prices have since plummeted.

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WORDS BY michelle roylance

dimweather

The small town of Dimweather was as gloomy and damp as its name. During the day, it felt like the sun was filtered through a lens that made everything pale; colourless. At night, the moon and stars shied away, leaving the streets in a wallowing darkness.

On one such night, a car drove into Dimweather and parked left of the town hall. The car itself was not particularly strange; it was an old model, with chipped red paint and a small dent in the passenger door. It was its presence, period, that was strange. Nobody simply “passed through” Dimweather. The townspeople kept to themselves and liked the outside world to stay outside. Unexplainable things tended to happen that were best left within their tight-knit community, like the time it snowed in the middle of summer, or when Ms Luis’ cat “flew” up to her second-story window.

A pair of pink heels climbed out of the passenger door and walked with empty, echoed steps along the footpath to a small alleyway, stopped, and turned.

The owner held a brown, worn suitcase, too small to be her own, but perhaps the possession of the small boy who slowly slid from the backseat of the car.

“Hurry up, Charlie,” the lady whispered. Something about the town unsettled her, as if anything louder than a whisper could wake the dead. The little boy’s short legs started running, until they reached his mother.

“Take my hand, Charlie,” she instructed, gathering his fingers in a leathery glove. She led him down the dimly lit alley, her thin heels quivering on the rough pavers.

The alley opened to a street with one lonely building overgrown with shrubbery. The red brick facade stood taller than the weeping trees forced to cower in its shadow.

Tucked away, the Institute was a mystery, even to the locals. No one had written a history about the place, and the only person ever seen going in and out was Mrs White, who, once a month was seen meeting with two gentlemen at Bev’s coffee shop.

The locals believed it to be a school of some sort, though they could never be sure, and never had cause to investigate.

Charlie’s mother forced open the gate which exhaled noisily from years of neglect. She stared up at the building, mouth agape, nervously tugging one of the perfect blonde curls that hung by her shoulder. She’d heard about the Institute from her beautician; it was where her boyfriend’s sister’s friend’s cousin had apparently

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fiction

taken her child. It had seemed like the perfect solution, a quick fix. But standing on those steps, Charlie’s mother wasn’t so sure. But Danny had insisted. Swallowing her doubts, she squatted most lady-like in front of her six-year-old son. The boy looked up at her with curious blue eyes but didn’t say anything. He never said anything. She tried to pry her hand from his, but he clung on tighter.

“You’ve got to let go of me, Charlie. I’m not staying with you. Danny’s gonna take care of me now, and he just don’t have the room to take care of you too. But these people, they understand children like you… I was never meant to be a mother.

If the letter I’d left with you on the steps of the orphanage hadn’t required a return address, I never would have been in this mess. But I won’t make the same mistake twice. They don’t know you’re coming, but they’ll have to keep you, they can’t just abandon you… This is my big break; you don’t want to hold me back now do you?”

Charlie just stared, and it unnerved her. She tore her hand from his and knocked on the old brown door. Before Charlie could make sense of her actions, she ran down the steps and became lost to him in the grim shadows of the alleyway.

Charlie looked up at the now bright green door. It swung open and an old woman greeted him, a candle in hand. She smiled at him warmly.

“I’ve been waiting for you, Charlie,” she said, taking an inviting step back.

“Welcome.”

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review The film draws attention to the under-recognised legacy of women surfers in the eighties, who pioneered the creation of professional women’s competition in a male-dominated arena.

Girls Can’t Surf, directed by Chris Nellius and produced by Michaela Perske, is a triumph of women’s sporting achievement. The film draws attention to the under-recognised legacy of women surfers in the eighties, who pioneered the creation of professional women’s competition in a male-dominated arena.

WORDS BY Maya Tlauka

The film captivates the viewer through its presentation of the iconic eighties fashion, hair, and rebellion. Even for the non-surfer, the excitement and adrenaline of the waves is palpable.

This vision is complemented by incisive commentary from retired professional female surfers: Jodie Cooper, Frieda Zamba, Pauline Menczer, Lisa Andersen, Pam Burridge, Wendy Botha and Layne Beachley.

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Initially drawn into surf culture by the sense of exhilaration and passion, the women describe the immense cultural challenges they faced in gaining acceptance, recognition, and equality.

Despite being inherently pitted against one another in their fight for number one, the women are united in their experience of sexism.

When watching the ascendancy of each new generation of female professional surfers from the eighties onwards, you cannot help but be shocked at the lasting character of sexism in the sport. There is no doubting that the exclusion and marginalisation of women was ingrained into surf culture.

In comparison to their male counterparts, female professional surfers were regarded as less skilled, afforded fewer sponsorships, offered less prize money,

and expected to surf in poorer conditions.

Through individual and shared experiences, the women carve out space for themselves, exhibiting the power of incremental change. A powerful moment that signalled changing tides in the sport is recalled, describing how at a 1999 South African competition the women collectively refused to surf in the absence of waves. Instead, they sat along the shore in defiance, symbolically rejecting being shoe-horned into being placeholders for men. No longer would they be lunch time entertainment, surfing only when the men were otherwise indisposed.

Perhaps the most valuable aspect of the documentary are the interviews conducted with the former surfing professionals. The women are admirably self-aware and humorous. The viewer cannot interpret their intentions as being anything other than honest, real, and raw.

The legacy of their struggle is evident in the signing of an equal pay deal by the World Surf League in 2019, finally enshrining pay parity decades later.

The documentary plays a central role in crediting the female athletes for the advancements regarding gender-equality we see in surfing today.

For the viewer wanting to be washed over by the atmosphere of surf culture, entertained, and inspired this documentary is a must.

Girls Can’t Surf is showing in Australian cinemas from March 11 onwards.

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Why Biden Won

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A University Story “

WORDS BY Habibah Jaghoori

It’s another year here at Adelaide Uni and by now there should be a sense of settlement. Routines established, class locations learned, acquaintances made, friendships solidified, old flames rekindled, old rivalries ready to be reignited, and one’s own aspirations thriving somewhere in there. First-year or old-timer, we are the student body, and we are what makes this community. The student experience is unlike any other, and the growing, unlearning, relearning, shifting, expanding, and realising is done when you put yourself in spaces that force you to question, to respond, to act, and to feel. It’s done when there is movement, both internally and externally. There is so much to university life outside the lecture hall and tutorial room. This is the time to get involved, to sow the seeds that are bound to grow into whatever your hands will have sent forth. If we do what’s good now, it will leave from us with praise as it settles in the future, waiting. There is a responsibility here on these grounds, now, during these times, and it’s waiting to be adhered to. The year is new, a fresh page has been turned, and even though the past is behind us, we have used it as a reminder.

Learn about the history of this university. The old and the recent. As university students, we are under an education system that needs to be recognised for what it is: a slave to the free market-producing, profit-driven, money hungry, business-like, status quo-serving institution. And it needs to be challenged. Take everything you are taught in class with a grain of salt. Professors and textbooks aren’t always right. Professors and textbooks play the role of serving the institution’s goals and not always for the genuine advancement of student welfare.

Make sure that most of your learning is happening outside of the classroom.

Attend campus events. More importantly, attend student protests and discover the reason why they are happening. The veil of what the university is involved in is very thin. Be courageous enough to uncover it. Understand the role of the university in gentrification, in Israeli apartheid, weapons-manufacturing, policing, fossil fuels, and do something about it. Don’t settle and don’t let them convince you that you can’t change it. The power of change is in your hands, waiting to be put out there to do its work. Every radical change that has occurred in the history of human civilisation has happened because revolutionaries and martyrs have witnessed their time and strived for another vision. The message of the revolutionaries truly contains good news for us. We should sharpen our hearing abilities so that we can hear this message. The message from the revolutionaries is about negating fear and sorrow. So be brave. Be brave in your art. Be brave in your activism. Be brave in your unlearning. Be brave in your relearning. Be brave in your inner revolution. And be brave in your repairing, rebuilding, and pursuing.

Photography by Tiah Bullock

The past is gone and cannot harm you anymore. And while the future is fast coming for you, it always flinches first and settles in as the gentle present.”

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For nearly four years, I worked in one of those suburban pubs in which every staff member either looked no older than eighteen or no younger than sixty-five. One of those pubs where the barman knows which pony to pick every time and making suggestive comments to the barmaid is considered a perfectly appropriate pastime. In other words, it was not the sort of place where one wished to stay too long unless there was patently no other choice.

The euphemism us younger ones liked to use was in reference to our long-planned escape - “I’ve got to get out of here” becomes a mantra oft-repeated.

to work less in the dining room and more in the gaming room. When your average $500-a-day gambler ambled down the thoroughfare, change jangling in his pockets as he approached the cash register, they left a dark aura in their trail that was practically visible. They were often rude; if there is one thing pub staff bitch about more than anything else, it’s a rude gambler. It’s part of the make-believe that what is happening when you hand over their coin cup is a perfectly normal market transaction - “Geez, what’s his problem?” The answer: it’s that you’ve sold a bullet to a suicidal man.

This is not about working in hospitality.

There are worse things in the world than being forced to smile against one’s will. It’s about the paradox of the Australian family pub: a strange territory fielded to the north by a clean, well-lit dining room (Hemingway would probably find it too well-lit), to the south by a comfortably spacious gaming room. Close your eyes and you’ll remember the sounds of the arcade at the Royal Show. Open your eyes, now: it is the violent, flashing lights of the Show as seen in one of those drab liminal spaces that appear in a dream. Anything is possible in this room, if you dream hard enough.

The poker machine industry in Australia made a turnover of around 20 billion dollars in 2018. The venue where I worked had a weekly turnover of about $1 million, which is in the upper crust compared to most venues. Part of it was because the suburb adjacent was of a low-socioeconomic status, and any study will show you there is a correlation between one’s desperation for money and a predisposition to gambling.

Actually, common sense says the exact same thing. But once again, part of the make-believe is that there isn’t a problem.

At worst, it is a symptom of the great liberal tendency to let others ruin their lives as long as you’re not forced to see the consequences of it.

I made a point of evading every request

WORDS BY JIALUN QI

WORDS BY ivan bucalo

Memoir: The Great Australian Pub

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I did see the consequences. In fact, I am living with them. One remortgaged house later, not to mention litigation by angry creditors, my family is very lucky to have a roof over their heads. But nor is this a sob story. It’s a matter of fact, and fills me less with self-pity than with the kind of resentment that is poisonous if ignored too long.

This particular hotel chain paid $30 an hour, which is the béchamel of hospitality awards.

A co-worker of mine, a university graduate, confided in me she was scared of becoming too comfortable there. She said what terrified her the most was how little impelled her to move on from that dank, stuffy sports bar.

And who could blame her? In the words of a wise songwriter, sometimes you just want to go where everybody knows your name.

Even the gaming staff were on friendly terms with the “addicts”. They would get free coffee, free drinks, food, you name it. It’s the VIP experience for those who have never felt worth given to them by anyone else: lonely pensioners, drug addicts and problem drinkers, refugees who were abandoned by the promise of the Australian dream, the wretched, the damned, the evil, the hopeless.

The great Australian pub, however, does not belong in the Fourth Circle of Hell, as good a view as it gets perched on its periphery.

If you want to find wisdom, go either to the sports bar of your local pub, or a library. I used to have a chronic daydream in which I imagined I wasn’t in the company of sedated

tradies, but instead members of a modern-day Symposium who were not admitted on the basis of nobility, but were a free association committed to the Socratic ideal of telling it how it is.

But it was all a load of hot shit.

The great Australian pub is no longer an idea. It is a cover operation for the pokies.

Everyone knows this. The rest of the pub is allowed to exist only to decorate this terrible truth. And you kid yourself when you buy into the make-believe that because you were born with a better head on your shoulders, with a name that could yet be tarnished by associating it with the most pitiful of all vices, that you are somehow closer in stature to the robber-barons who glutton themselves like pigs from a trough than you are with the guy who can’t tear his hands away from the pokies. It is one of the worst sentiments of modern capitalism distilled to its essence: that you should judge yourself based on who you will be five years from now and not who you were five minutes ago. And who can say to themselves, honestly, that they’ve never been fooled by a false beacon of hope? What about three lots of bullion in a row?

So, spare a glance for the addict the next time you visit your local. It will tell you more about the great, deflated Australian pub than any number pulled out of a census can.

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Biden’s Big 4 Challenges Biden’s Big 4 Challenges Facing an uncontrolled pandemic resulting in thousands of deaths and economic collapse, while at the same time battling a divided Congress and an increasingly radicalised right-wing, it is not unreasonable to say that Joe Biden is expected to face no shortage of challenges in the next four years.

WORDS BY Sebastian Andrew

covid

exists the likelihood that the American public grows increasingly weary of these restrictive measures.

As this is written, 28.4 million cases of COVID-19 and 502.5 thousand deaths have been recorded in total across the US. Curbing skyrocketing COVID infections and deaths is what I believe will be the greatest challenge Biden faces as a president, but one that will not be resolved nearly as quickly or easily as many hoped.

Although it has been highlighted that many of these challenges arise from the actions of state governments, Biden ran on and was elected due to confidence to stop COVID, and will be ultimately blamed if deaths and infections continue.

The Biden Administration’s proposal of enough vaccines for all Americans by July is promising but subject to potential roadblocks along the way. A shortage of doses due to higher demand could delay timelines and leave at-risk communities vulnerable for longer. Similarly, as vaccine distribution remains the responsibility of state governments, they run the risk of differing on criteria for receiving a jab, or as is alleged in Florida, distribution of vaccines overwhelmingly favouring wealthy and white residents over POC and poor residents, despite the latter being more at risk of contracting and dying from COVID. Additionally, vaccination rates could be impacted by misinformation and refusal, with around 20% of American adults either hesitant or refusing to get vaccinated. However, Biden’s challenge of curbing infections and deaths will face challenges before enough of the population is vaccinated, primarily from public apathy and resistance. Protective measures such as mask mandates or business shutdowns vary between states, from relatively tight, or nearly non-existent, leading to outbreaks in population centres such as Florida or Los Angeles. Additionally, there

Biden inherits a nation in desperate need of economic relief. More than 779’000 Americans are seeking unemployment benefits and more than 400’000 small businesses have been permanently shut down. In 2020, McKinsey & Company estimated that most industries could recover by late 2020 or early 2021 in a virus-contained scenario, but estimated in a muted-recovery scenario (without COVID containment), return to pre-COVID GDP levels would take years, with the arts, food services, and manufacturing especially hard-hit, and expected to experience this return in 2025 or beyond. The speed at which economic recovery is achieved will depend on whether Biden’s vaccination program is successful and whether infections can be brought to a minimum.

However, some industries will take years to recover, regardless of how favourable virus conditions are. This recovery is also stalled by the number lacking sufficient disposable income. Biden’s $1.9 trillion stimulus seeks to address this through directed cheques and rental assistance, in the hope Americans will spend more.

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the economy

Any large stimulus package such as what has been proposed is likely to face opposition from Republicans. This could either result in the size of assistance being decreased, or passage of the bill being stalled, leaving those in need suffering for longer. Additionally, its impact could be blunted by overeager state governors reopening economies too early, leading to prolonged outbreaks and unfavourable conditions for consumers. This reintroduces the possibility of ongoing restrictions which create further economic pain.

opposition in congress Aside from COVID relief, Biden and congressional Democrats have ambitions to address areas including voting rights, healthcare access, LGBTQ+ protections, clean energy infrastructure, and more. Given the narrow majorities Biden holds in Congress, and the nature of the Senate in particular, it is likely Biden’s legislative agenda will be blocked, or at least severely stalled in part, for the entirety of his term.

Why? A senate rule called the filibuster allows a single senator to block legislation through prolonged debate, unless 60 Senators vote to proceed. A loophole exists for moving spending and revenue legislation, which can be passed by a simple majority, but all other laws cannot be passed without the support of all Democrats and at least ten Republicans.

The use of filibuster for legislation can be removed by a simple majority, but conservative Democrats, typically from Republican leaning states, have refused to support such a move.

Essentially, aside from perhaps infrastructure spending, this requirement leaves the policy proposals mentioned above with a near-zero chance of getting passed, unless Democrats win 60 seats in the Senate, which also has a near-zero chance of happening.

This creates more problems. Come the 2022 midterms, will the liberal base be excited to turn out and help Democrats keep Congress if no major policy promises have been delivered? Should Republicans take Congress and render Biden a lame-duck president two years into his term? Will voters be pleased when he returns in 2024 (if he does) with a nearly bare record? While these are hypothetical challenges, and results in the 2022 midterms and 2024 election will be influenced by the success of

COVID control and the state of the economy, they are worth noting.

right-wing extremism Beginning with birtherism (the belief Barack Obama was not American-born) and the rise of the Tea Party in ’09, America’s right-wing is radicalising and welcoming conspiracy theorists, especially following the presidency of Donald Trump, and his anti-democratic, reality-denying rhetoric. They reject Joe Biden’s legitimacy as president, believe the “deep state” is against them and supporting undemocratic acts such as the jailing or even murder of political opponents. They likewise view Biden not as an opponent, but as an enemy of the state.

Troublingly for Biden, this toxicity has infected Republican elected officials, who either believe in the rhetoric espoused by their base, parrot it to stay in power, or oppose it privately but do little to speak out against it.

As demonstrated on January 6th, this radicalisation poses a clear threat to the safety of Joe Biden, his Democratic colleagues, and the health of America’s democracy. Politically, it has created a Republican caucus with many members unwilling to work with or recognize his legitimacy as president, and the introduction of laws across states deliberately designed to make his re-election more difficult, inspired by former president Trump’s baseless claims against the electoral process.

While these pose significant hurdles, this list is by no means exhaustive. Other challenges facing Biden include extreme, global warming-related weather events, China’s soft-power ambitions and expanding economic growth, systemic racism, and income inequality, among others. Additionally, this is only based on a current understanding of events, and it is entirely possible that Biden will face a tremendous challenge which, just like COVID-19, cannot be currently foreseen.

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How How Algorithms Algorithms Make Make Us Us Hate Hate

WORDS BY Chanel Trezise

Online platforms have facilitated echo chambers for ideologies and beliefs, a great deal of which are politically skewed and ethically iffy. As a result of social media algorithms and advertising, consumers are exposed to an ever narrowing and polarising personalised feed of information. However, it is polarised actors which continue a cycle of radicalisation by targeting vulnerable individuals already falling down ideological rabbit holes.

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While the internet is a beautiful web of connections and information firing back and forth, its bubbly façade unwittingly exacerbates marketing ploys. Surveillance capitalism is the commodification of the news we frequent, the posts we like, and content we engage with - our data, in other words. Surveillance capitalism trivialises the abuse of privacy to provide us with personalised algorithms, tailored advertisements, groups, and sponsorships. It facilitates the eventual echo-chambers that extremist actors piggy-back on.

Because the sites we frequent generate capital, our experiences are dependent on our engagement and the commodification of our engagement. The more an individual engages with a specific type of content or ideology, the more algorithms push similar content to maximise profit.

Because it is human nature to seek connections and partnership, if an individual cannot access this in their personal life, it is not uncommon for them to

reach out online. Further, it is easier to package ideas to an individual by offering them friendship and community in exchange.

In this regard, extremist groups take advantage of surveillance capitalism by endorsing a sense of exclusion and ostracisation. This fuels an othering narrative that is similarly provided by a personalised algorithm. These individuals are sold untruths to solidify and base an emotive response to isolation.

However, surveillance capitalism favours this as emotive responses tend to fuel extremism. An individual who does not have the tools of critical thinking and education necessary to question misinformation and extreme biases pushed by an algorithm can easily fall prey to them. The response is emotive, not rational in nature.

For example, within the so-called incel community, lonesome men who adopt a shared ideology of the apparent discrimination and rejection of men, by women, are recruited by others who have fallen into this ideology already.

It is this belief that branches into their accompanying misogynistic rationale and adopted cycle of victimhood. Incel beliefs are dependent on an emotion-fuelled narrative of perpetual victimhood.

Additionally, incels often believe that they are exempt from moral reasoning because of their victimhood. Currently, individuals from the incel community have performed 11 terrorist attacks since 2014 and taken the lives of 64 people.

“Human nature tempts us to react to what we perceive as injustice through a black and white lens.”

In 2015, Chris Harper-Mercer fatally shot 9 people at his university campus. Chris frequented online sites and forums, a few of which include 4chan’s /r9k/ board, a MySpace profile depicting fascist and pro-militant beliefs, and a religious dating site. While it is not conclusive that Chris’ online presence radicalised him, it is likely that it motivated his behaviour. Chris’ frequent posting, liking, and sharing of extremist material allowed him to validate his immoral beliefs and reinforce a narrative of us versus them.

Overall, modern polarisation is a by-product of skewed narratives, vulnerability, emotive irrationality, and data extortion.

Human nature tempts us to react to what we perceive as injustice through a black and white lens. The othering narratives used by extremist groups, paired with the political rabbit holes facilitated by online platforms, equates to a grander, more dangerous scale of polarisation.

Hence, we need to probe irrationality to understand extremism and deconstruct its recurring characteristics. We need to challenge the data extortion on our media platforms to help those who cannot understand the mistruths and great biases before them, and do whatever possible to curb the rise of online extremism.

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STRIPES. STRIPES.

stripes.

Elder Conservatorium graduate Harry Starick formed stripes. as a solo project before bringing Blake Pedler on board as a drummer.

Their mixture of “pretty guitar riffs and aggressive, hard hitting drums” are the sort of thing you want to hear in a grungy, city pub at 1am in the morning. But Starick’s standalone EP, recorded during lockdown last year, underscores some surprisingly mellower influences.

Where did the name Stripes. come from?

Harry: I used to wear stripy shirts a lot and it was my nickname for a while. Then there’s this math rock band called sports., with a

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full stop on the end that I really like and I sort of pinched that. I think band names short always be short, sweet, and memorable.

What was the original idea behind Stripes.?

H: Blake came to the band pretty recently as a drummer. For the most part it was pretty similar before that. Not much has changed in terms of the math rock influence, but I think our sound has gotten a lot less heavy. We’ve been listening to a lot of American Football which has a much softer, cleaner sound, but regardless, we’re a still a math rock band at heart.

What sort of music were you guys listening to before you formed Stripes.? Has it rubbed off on your work?

Blake: I was listening to a lot of Tiny Moving

Parts recently, which is a pretty big contrast to the heavier stuff I was into before.

I think Harry got me into that slightly softer, twinklier sound, which is different, but nice.

H: During uni, I really got into mid-west emo, which was all about really talented, crazy good music, but not overproduced, and sometimes even the timing is off… it’s charming, and not perfect, and nice to listen to.

What are your favourite songs on Base Camp?

H: Tealu. It’s in this really whacky tuning that I’ve never really used for any other song and I can’t figure out anything else for. And the lyrics are really nice… “Waiting for you at the front door, like a dog waiting for its owner to come home...” A lot of my writing just comes from thousands of notes, little scribblings, and finding a way to put them into a song. A lot of songs will have random phrase thrown in because the songwriter couldn’t think of what to say and just had to fill the end of a verse… I feel like I used to do that, but when you notice it you start to work on it.

What’s one thing that a lot of songwriters get wrong that’s an easy fix?

B: What I’m trying to work on is having a coherence and a story to each song – not just a riff, riff, verse, chorus.

H: Making the songs linear in a way.

A lot of people starting out have these jarring changes in style and don’t really know what they’re trying to do with the song. Your storytelling needs to there too, because having a good story is ultimately what makes your song catchy and memorable.

One artist people wouldn’t expect you to like?

B: Happy, feel-good EDM pop music, like Porter Robinson.

H: Synthwave and vaporwave. But it’s not

Do you think your next LP is going to be similar to Base Camp in going for a lo-fi sound?

H: We’ve talked to the producer and what we want to do is make the listener feel like they’re in the room with us. Like it’s a live performance, with little sound quality degradations. There’s a lot of nostalgia in our songs and we try to play off that.

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surprising because I’m a bit of a nerd.

Best artist of the last 10 years?

B: I got into Sophie pretty late, but her work has done so much for that scene.

H: I’d say Slaughter Beach, Dog, or a local band called Racoon City Worst?

H: Coldplay or U2.

B: If Nickelback are still around, them.

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What makes the perfect bandmate?

H: Blake.

B: Harry.

Aw.

interview by Ivan bucalo

Photography by tiah BUllock

Check out their EP Base Camp on Spotify

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L-R: Arabella Wauchope, Stella Salvemini, Rebecca Etienne. Credit: Sarah Reed and The Advertiser, 12th September 2020.

Will the real Women’s Collective please stand up?

When I was younger, much like most siblings, my brother and I would fall into the tiring, sometimes endless cycle that is the copy-cat game.

I would complain to my mother who would all-too predictably recite the common, diplomatic, maternal phrase: “Imitation is the highest form of flattery.”

WORDS BY lady adelaide

This frustrated me to no end as a child, until one day, in my late-teens, I came across an expanded version: “Imitation might be the highest form of flattery, but it reflects the lowest level of intelligence and imagination…”

Excuse this author if she thinks of this beautifully crafted phrase when she casts her mind to the mockery that is the NEW UofA Women’s Collective (New WoCo).

For those of you dear readers, who are just joining the debacle that is the fight of the UofA Women’s Collective, let this author catch you up to speed.

Once Upon a Time in September of 2019, a group of proud, strong women decided that they could fill a much-needed gap at UofA. These women gathered for the first time above the Fix Student Lounge to hold their first AGM. Positions were appointed, notes were taken, ideas were brewed, and

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consequently, the Original UofA Women’s Collective (OG WoCo) was founded on sisterhood, commitment and a common drive. By golly, an energetic tornado of pure feminist advocacy was about to land on the University of Adelaide campus. The members were motivated, their supporters were waiting with anticipation, all that was needed was to be approved as a club.

Sigh.

Alas, this club was denied from the get-go, apparently: "Celebrating women is not unique or necessary” and there is “no need for this club."

- AUU Clubs Committee Rest assured, dear reader, our heroines did not go down without a fight! Appeals were thrown, only to be met with rejection or flat-out disregard. The AUU Board put up its walls and their allies started firing political accusations at a club whose only ambition was to advocate for equality, educate, and provide a much-needed safe space.

Amidst this battle, the OG WoCo did not sit idle. Their reputation on campus grew with charity events, social meet-ups, organised protests, and the refurbishing of the Women’s Room, all the while they were still self-funded.

RALLY for Survivors, August 2020

International Women’s Day March, March 2020

Clubsland, Feb 2020

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Soon, multiple news outlets recognised the injustice our heroines had been dealt and began to share their story across the land.

Hear Ye, Hear Ye:

March 2020 offered a potential resolution for our heroines. Appealing to a tentative ally, the OG WoCo sought affiliation with the Student Representative Council (SRC).

But, as we all know by now, everything comes at a price. In exchange for this affiliation, the OG WoCo had to hand-down the autonomy to choose their own club president. They had to allow the SRC to forcefully give the title to the presiding Women’s Officer, who, at the time, was ally, supporter, and advocate, iron-clad Rebecca Etienne.

However, in the gracious eyes of Miss Etienne, and the rest of the WoCo community, “former president” Stella Salvemini still wore the crown.

that they might be met with the same en

thusiasm for women’s rights that the club was now known for. Unfortunately, dear reader, this author is sad to report that these efforts were not met… at all. Currently none of the messages sent from a number of our heroines to the new SRC Women’s Officer have been addressed.All silence ceased on March 4th, however, with a post from the new SRC Women’s Officer herself announcing the creation of a NEW Women’s Collective.

Despite friction with the AUU Board and SRC, and constant sweeps of arrows dragging politics into discussions like a piece of roadkill, the OG WoCo still found the means to make things work, calling on their allies for collaborative projects, and using their growing platform to call-out the misogynistic acts of the resisting patriarchy on campus.

2021 brought upheaval. With a newly elected SRC Women’s Officer, the OG WoCo did not know how things might proceed.

Who was this new face and how might she use her role to support or diminish the long-standing work of our heroines?

There were many efforts made to make contact with their new leader, and the hope

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Dear reader, this author’s hair did split!

How could anyone show such disregard for the amazing work already put forward by our heroines, and to lack even the slightest originality to come up with a fresh name?

Does this new SRC Women’s Officer hope to piggy-back of the work and reputation

already associated with the UofA Women’s Collective?

Quickly, however, this author was pleasantly delighted as she scrolled through the comments of this new post only to find memes that tickled the funny bone, and an overwhelming amount of support for our heroines who carry the OG WoCo with grit, imagination and literal tears.

No shorter, sweeter or more powerful words were expressed than that which formed the OG WoCo’s response:

However, this author cannot praise all the comments made in response to the new SRC Women’s Officer’s post. Dear reader, while the OG WoCo and New WoCo may not see eye to eye (to put things mild and simple) they both advocate the message that there is never a cause of action that requires a sexist attack on anyone, and, well, as was pointed out by the new SRC Women’s Officer, this situation has teetered across that line.

With gusto, the new SRC Women’s Officer did call out her attackers and assured her followers that she would not be stopped.

While there were some aspects of her post that did not float so well with our heroines and their supporters, there was one line that offered a small flicker of hope: Hopefully one day in the future, despite this awful treatment, opportunities for collaboration will be possible.”

Dear reader, this author would personally love to see our heroines fully accepted and supported and collaborating with the new SRC Women’s Officer, but we shall have to wait and see as the pages continue to turn.

One cannot watch this play out and not think on that age-old question which has been on the lips of every member and supporter of the OG WoCo since the early days: Why were they not affiliated?”

After many, many months of dwelling on this predicament, this author has personally come to her own conclusion. Based on the medieval mindset of their adversaries, much like those persecutors in the time of King James I of England, this author can only assume that they fear that these women are “collecting” themselves to perform the only plausible thing women might gather for: witchcraft.

And so, in keeping with the characters that they so beautifully cast our heroines in, this author would hear-by like to formally curse any and all who would stand in the way of our group of heroines… a collective of like-minded women who gather to dance naked under the full moon, hex their spiteful neighbours, advocate for the rights of women on campus, and who call themselves the OG Women’s Collective.

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Peter works part-time at a pizza parlour.

Pat, Peter’s employer, is particularly worried about Peter. Having worked with him for a long time, Pat knows that Peter is a hard worker and a money maker. Peter’s pizzas are – in the parlance of the perennially picky populace – pretty pleasing to the palate.

Peter the Pancake Peddler

The problem is, recently, Peter has periodically pestered Pat with the proposition of peddling pancakes. Pancakes are where the paper’s at, as Peter would say; practically everyone is profiting prodigiously from peddling pancakes.

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Pat, predictably, feels nonplussed pertaining to Peter’s prattle. “I’m perfectly happy to peddle pancakes,” Pat professes, “but we’re predominantly a pizza parlour, not a pancake pantry. I still want you to prepare pizzas, principally.”

“Sure thing, boss,” says Peter, as he prepares another pancake. “Don’t you worry, I recognise pizza as a fundamental human right and fundamental to upholding our calorific values.”

Pat shrugs and lets the matter pass. The truth is, Peter’s pancakes are popular, with lots of paying customers. It is very hard to tell Peter off, Pat admits, when his policy of pancake peddling is pulling in piles of paper.

Weeks later, Pat finds out that Peter has been partaking in Paypal payments from Pancakes Pty. The sums weren’t peanuts either. That would explain why Peter is so persistent about peddling Pancakes! Pat postulates.

Pat presses Peter about these payments. “What’s all this paper you’ve been pocketing from Pancakes Pty.?” Pat asks. “Are they paying you to peddle pancakes?”

“Not at all!” Peter protests. “They’re just good pals of mine, who want to deepen cultural and economic ties with pizza parlours through a peaceful and lawful exchange of ideas and ideologies.”

“Oh, fair enough,” says Pat, not knowing what that means, exactly. “But I wish you’d told me about it.”

“What’s the big deal, boss?” Peter asks. “We’re pocketing prodigious profits from peddling pancakes! That’s preem, right?”

Pat scratches his head. “I guess, yeah, it’s no big deal.”

Weeks later, Pat sees a proclamation in the papers: Pancake Pty Denounces Pizza as a Food Preference!

Perturbed, Pat points it out to Peter. “Hey, what’s all this about them not liking pizzas?”

“Oh, don’t worry about that boss,” Peter says. “They just like to preach, nothing will come of it. By the way, can I sell more pancakes? I want to sell about 17% more pancakes year-onyear.”

“I already told you, Peter, we’re a pizza parlour,” Pat points out, perplexed. “I’m happy with us peddling pancakes, but not at the expense of our pizzas.”

fiction

“I… I like pizzas,” says Pat. He’s never had to explain why he liked pizzas before – since people mostly take it for granted – so his plugging of its positives is precarious at best.

Weeks later, an incident occurs at the pizza parlour.

“Peter! Peter!” Pat yells. “Why did you kick out that customer? He wanted pizza!”

“That customer insulted my pancakes,” Peter protests peevishly.

WORDS BY Jialun Qi

“Come on, boss,” Peter pleads. “Pancakes pull in so much paper. Plus, what’s so good about pizzas anyway?”

“Oh, fair enough. We don’t tolerate that sort of behaviour in our pizza parlour,” Pat declares proudly. “What did he say?”

“Well, boss, he denounced pancakes as a food preference.”

“Huh?” Pat is puzzled. “He denounced pancakes as a food preference?”

“Yep, and I presented a pummelling to his posterior. As you said, we don’t tolerate that sort of behaviour.”

“Huh?!” Pat is positively puzzled. “That’s it? But your pals from Pancake Pty. said the exact same thing a while back.”

“Oh, yeah,” says Peter, “but they use that sort of language all the time. It’s no big deal.”

“This is appalling.” Pat shakes his head. “I just want to run my pizza parlour in peace. I’m going to have to let you go, Peter. You’re producing too much drama and I don’t want to deal with it.”

“That’s a shame, boss,” says Peter. “Will you write me a good recommendation?”

“You did good work and you made me lots of money,” says Pat. “Of course I will write you a good recommendation.”

Peter is let go with a premium severance package. Weeks later, Pat finds out that Peter has found a job at another pizza parlour, and is still raking in the paper with his pancakes.

“Good for him,” Pat professes to his pen pal, “but if he prefers pancakes so much, why doesn’t he go work in a pancake pantry? Why another pizza parlour?”

“Because they’re already peddling as much pancake as they can at the pancake pantry,” corresponds Pat’s pen pal. “Pancake Pty. needs him to peddle pancakes at pizza parlours.”

“They’ve certainly procured the perfect man for that proposition,” writes Pat. “Peter is good at lots of things, but he is particularly proficient at peddling pancakes in pizza parlours.”

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Are You Actually an Energy-Vampire?

Sean Hall – CEO, TedX Speaker, Mental Health Activist Tell me a bit about yourself and your company EnergX. What are the company's aims and how might it benefit students? How does the collaboration with LEGO come into this?

An Abridged Interview with Sean Hall

We say that we’re a human performance company and essentially what we do is teach a skill that we call energy intelligence. Energy intelligence is really just about being aware of the decisions that you make that energise you, versus the ones that deplete you. What we’re trying to do is help people just be more aware of it and make small decisions that actually impact them and potentially positively impact other people as well.

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One of the reasons I’m so excited to be collaborating with LEGO is, at the essence of this it’s really about mindfulness.

So often when we’re thinking about mindfulness, we’re thinking about meditation and breathing, but at its essence mindfulness is just about being present. Sometimes we need little tools or practices that help us do that because our brains love to be distracted and the world is built to distract us. I always say that’s why our brain’s go into screen-saver mode a lot, because our brains actually take a lot of energy from our body. Our brains are only about 5% of our body weight but they use about 20% of our energy.

When we’re doing something like LEGO we have to look at the detail, we have to follow instructions and that really forces us to be in the moment. As adults as well there’s a little bit of joy that comes from that because we’re reliving a little bit of our childhood. What we’re doing when we are relaxed and focussed in this sort of way is that it actually lights up a

part of our brain known as the DMN, or Default Mode Network. That part of the brain is our intuitive, creative side, and so often when we’re learning we’re applying that to solving problems, and we want to be creative and see all the opportunities, come up with different solutions or we want to come up with something that is different or unique and so being able to access that DMN, that part of our brain, is really important.

In your Tedtalk you mention this defining moment in your life where you asked yourself, "How did I get here?"’

Do you think it's important that we consciously ask ourselves this question regularly? What sort of impact might this have on us?

Yeah, I think at the core of that question is really this idea of responsibility. The thing about “adulting” is that we’re all ultimately responsible for our lives. What I had to realise in that moment was that there were a couple of things going on.

One was that I actually knew a lot about well-being My first career was in fitness, so I had sixteen years of experience and I still ended up in that situation, so I had to go, “Oh what don’t I know?” and sometimes it’s like, “Well, I know that, but I’m not practicing it.” So, I know I should have been sleeping more, but I wasn’t practicing it. But then there were other things that I didn’t know. For instance, I’m a reformed perfectionist and I’m also a reformed “yes” guy, so I was making all these decisions that I didn’t realise were impacting my well-being or I was letting my inner-critic beat me up a lot and I think we’ve never really been taught how to manage our inner-critic. That relationship with ourselves is so essential to

to our well-being.

resource?

So, just that little pause and reflection was like, okay, I need to take responsibility for the decisions that I made that led me to be in this position, because no-one did that to me. I made those decisions and I had to think, well, I can’t change my job, I have to change myself. I have to take responsibility for my career. And I do think that that’s a big thing for all of us to think about; when we have those little moments when something doesn’t quite go the way we thought it would; I didn’t get the mark I wanted, we have to take personal responsibility and question, what did I do that led to this situation? Our lives, our reality, are a result of those decisions.

It’s so overwhelming often just not knowing where to start. I think its also really important to be kind to ourselves, you know when you’re overwhelmed you can feel like you’ve got to change your whole life, when actually you can just change one thing.

And the places I get people to start is three simple things that literally take no extra time to look after yourself.

There’s only really three things we can control in our lives. The first is that we can take responsibility for our energy; what are the self-care decisions that I’m making that recharge my batteries, that allow me to be at my best, that allow me to be energised and that doesn’t mean being “Rah Rah” energy all the time. Sometimes it’s just a quiet confidence. The second thing we can take control over is taking responsibility for our impact on others; how do people feel when we interact with them? I always say, no-one wants to be an energy vampire. Often, we will be an energy vampire to other people when we’re not mindful of how we’re impacting each other. So, we’ve got to think about our energy impact on each other. Finally, we can take responsibility for being really damn good at what we do; being a master of our craft in some way, whatever that is. At its essence you’re just coming back to that essential thing: it’s all about being mindful. Every single decision that we are making is impacting our energy and potentially the energy of others. What I find is often we’re giving our worst energy to the people we care about the most.

The second thing is just drinking enough water. Our brains are around 85% water, and just the small amount of dehydration impacts how we think and feel.

Do you think perhaps the large number of resources available to us on how to ‘be well’ can be sometimes overwhelming? Where and how do you suggest we start and how do we tell what is a good

The first is just getting enough sleep. Understand your chronotype, which is your natural bedtime and then try to get the recommended eight hours, and there’s an assessment on the website that works it out.

The last thing I add is just to practice gratitude. This can sometimes feel a little bit fluffy for people, but the positive psychology research shows that just writing down three things each day, just even for one week, has a big impact on your wellbeing and I think it’s so important, especially in times like this where we’ve got so much uncertainty to focus on what we do have versus what we don’t. We like to make this a little bit fun; we like to say that the things you’re grateful for are the things that make you shimmy. That feeling of gratitude in you is a little shimmy and then you just bring it to the outside. Its impossible to feel bad when you’re shimmying. Be that person who shimmies into the room.

Did the pandemic have a noticeable impact on energy levels? If so, how might we combat that in these unsure times?

How did virtual learning play into this?

Yes, is the main thing, right? And I want to explain how uncertainty actually impacts us from a neuroscience point of view. Uncertainty kills our dopamine. But the way that we get our dopamine turned on again is to focus on what we can control, and

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then we act.

There are four happy hormones that work in the brain. The first is dopamine, the second is oxytocin, which is a bit like a love hormone, but it’s really around connection. Serotonin, which we’ve talked about is made in your gut, and then endorphins. Easy way to remember those is DOSE. So, we want to get a DOSE of happy hormones every day. The way that we do that is given in another acronym CALM. We create a little CALM plan and we can do this in two minutes, do this at the start of the day, share it with someone and then get them to check-in with you at the end of the day.

C stands for Connect. Who am I going to connect with today in a meaningful way?

Often when we’re not feeling our best, we might withdraw, and this is where we really need to take responsibility: I still need to stay connected because that’s so essential to my well-being. It’s also about looking after each other, the person you choose to connect with. It might not even be about you, you might just want to check-in on this person. We don’t want our friends or the people we care about to feel lonely in these times, especially if we’re isolated. The other way to think about it, is sometimes that can be about connecting with yourself, going, “I’m just going to take a time out today, I’m going to do something for myself.” Connecting helps us get oxytocin.

A stands for Act. So, what am I going to act on today, so that could be an act of self-care. Choose something that you’re going to act on. One of the things that I think is basic can be veggies: I’m going to make sure I get my six serves of veggies today, because then I’m going to get my serotonin.

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move today? Often when it comes to moving or exercise, sometimes we feel like we’ve got to steal time away from other places. Think about how can I incorporate it into something I’m already doing; is there a conversation or a meeting in my diary that I can do while I’m moving? Or it could be that you choose even to stand rather then sit, just these little things that we can incorporate.

Create that calm plan each day. Do it before you look at your phone in the morning, then share it with someone and see what theirs is and then check-in with them and see if they did it. How did it go, how did they feel?

When we’re in back-to-back Zoom calls, that’s exhausting for us, because there’s this cognitive dissonance going on. We’re trying to trick our brains that we’re in the room together, but our bodies know that we’re not. That dissonance is exhausting for us. We crave that social connection, to be in the same room, because our energy is contagious and you can bounce off, and just being able to look someone properly in the eyes is really important.

So, what can I do to combat that?

Okay well, for some of my learning, I’m going to turn my camera off and I’m just going to focus on my listening skills. We know that just looking at ourselves is really distracting, but also about 50% of the processing power in our brain is actually switched off as well when we close our eyes. So, it’s a great way of giving our brain a rest, and building our active listening skills and removing distractions.

Virtual learning is fantastic in so many ways, we just have to be aware that back-to-back it is really hard on us.

L stands for Laugh. We want to boost our mood in some way. When we laugh, especially a big-belly laugh, which gives us a boost of endorphins.

Any tips for students who are about to undertake their final year and are preparing for “the real world”? Any tips for new students who are about to adapt to university life, schedules and workload?

M stands for Move. How am I going to

First thing I really want to say is be kind

to yourself. We put ourselves under so much pressure. Know that self-care is not selfish. We can only achieve what we have energy for.

All of us are motivated in lots of different ways. A good way to think about this is to ask, why do I want to have more energy? Some people want the best possible results. Some people want to make sure they have a great qualification to support their side-hustle. Work out what that why is for you and don’t compare yourself to anyone else. We are constantly comparing ourselves to stuff that’s not real.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

ted talk

website

lego

One of the things that I talk about is, what’s the opposite of stress?

People often say it’s being calm, its joy, its ice-cream. But a Kiwi bio-chemist that I follow, Dr Libby Weaver has said that stress is ultimately the bio-chemical response in our body when we perceive a threat. Therefore, if we want to reduce stress, we actually have to change our perception, and so the opposite of stress is actually trust. So, when we’re stressed, we can ask, okay, what do I need to trust right now? Sometimes it’s about trusting ourselves. I know I’ve done the work; I know the topic, I trust myself.

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review A silhouette silently approaches you in the early morning fog. Beyond the sticky residue of a blink you can see the break of day hazily crawling up from behind them. A bush separates you and the shady figure. It’s leaves reach out for them, because they bring with them the first glow of the sun.

But you still have a moment before it sweeps you away... A moment before the Melbourne greenery shifts colour like a chameleon to the light... A moment before warm rays of sunshine part the fog with ease... A moment before your eyes adjust with a shutter and a click to bring the silhouette into focus... A moment before the blinding glint off of a tall metal telegraph pole, fading into the background, forces your hand over your eyes. Deja vu rushes through your body like pins and needles. You blink again, and the moment has arrived.

Silent Approach, the painting described above, is the opening act of The Present Moment. It is a perfect introduction to the ethereal style of Clarice Beckett, which is intimately replicated in the surrounding gallery space.

Rooms subtly change colour to match the dusk to dawn theme of the exhibition, and a pulsing, surrounding soundscape encourages viewers to hold on to the present moment with a deep breath. Walking through The Present Moment is like living a day in a dream. There is a strange wispiness to it that will stay with you long after you leave.

the present moment is being exhibiited at the Art gallery of south australia until may 16th

Tickets

WORDS BY beck rowse

Much of that quality can be attributed to Beckett’s mastery of tonalism, an artistic style in which, like an after-image from a blink, a painter will capture a scene in the order that it meets their eye. The result is a strong emphasis on atmosphere. Each painting feels strangely familiar, personal and melancholic. You feel as though you are reliving an old memory when you view a Beckett. The collection works as a pseudo-diary of her life in the 1920’s to the 1930’s and retells many moments lost in time. The rumble of a Ford Model T over damp tarmac, the sound of a telegraph pole cutting the wind, and the cheerful chatter of people at Sandringham Beach. The Present Moment is an exhibition that attaches itself to your imagination. A sensory experience that extends beyond the visual. A dream that you dream to go back to.

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they are exact, most evenings after whose arrival wrings its dead orange with a sudden flash,

Photography & WORDS BY Tiah Bullock

making us ridiculous and as old as ever.

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photography by tiah Bullock WORDS BY raphail Spartalis

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The air was cold. And damp. She didn’t know how she knew that... how she knew anything, for that matter.

What was “cold”? And how was that different to what wasn’t cold? There was a word for that... she was sure there was. Then as if by simply thinking it, she summoned the lost vocabulary from the dusty recesses of her mind with sharp realisation: hot! The suddenness of that thought jolted her just as a smile instinctively creased the length of her bandaged face. She sent a questing hand up to inspect the strange changes to her mouth.

Mouth. ‘Maaauuuu-tthhh.’ She voiced the word clumsily, feeling the shape of it as much with her lips as with her probing hands. Was this warm breathy noise really coming from her?

She was moving her hands all over her face now, touching and poking it like a curious child. Eyes. Nose.

Hair- no. No hair. She was sure that wasn’t right. And even while thinking it, her mind wandered to a tattered memory of thick, woolly locks dropping in heavy curls past her shoulders.

Auburn. Yes, it was auburn. But this memory was at such stark odds with reality that her brain all but rejected it. Was that truly her hair? How could it be? Her fingers tracked a deep scar across her close-cropped scalp, the short bristly hair pricking her hand sharply. Her heart sank.

No, the memory was real, she thought, sudden resolve steeling her mind. With a newfound confidence, she groped after the memory, desperate not to lose this piece of herself.

But it was weak, frayed at the edges like an old, dirty rag. She could feel it fading even now; each attempt to recall it weakening her grip on it. But she refused to give up, and in a childish act of fervent denial, reached out with her arms as if to grab the thought and

hold it to her chest. But it was too late. The thread had snapped. The memory was gone.

A pain suddenly rose up from inside her, pulling her thoughts back to the present. She gripped at her stomach; it burned like a furnace.

(Her father worked with furnaces... yes, her father...) She closed her eyes from the pain, blinking heavy drops of tears onto the tiled floor below.

The pain was unbearable. She felt as if she would pass out. And in the next moment, she did.

Mercer looked into the room through a reinforced plexiglass window; the girl was small and sickly, and covered almost entirely in thick, white bandages. There were a handful of spots on her body where the stark whiteness was interrupted by patches of cherry red; her forearms, a spot just beneath her ribcage, a large ring circling her throat. Considering the wounds beneath those lengths of wrap made him recoil slightly. Jesse seemed to notice.

‘Best not to think about it,’ he said to Mercer, barely turning to acknowledge the man.

‘Doesn’t it bother you?’

‘It’s not my job to be bothered by it. We just need to watch her.’

Mercer twisted his face at that. ‘I don’t get it though. I understand they gotta run the tests and that, but why do they gotta leave her on the ground all alone and cold afterwards? Seems unnecessary to me. And cruel...’ The words faded as he turned his attention back to the girl. She was touching her face now, and it looked like she was trying to speak.

‘Mercer, we’re not paid to worry about the comfort of the specimens. Whatever the guys upstairs decide for them, I’m sure they have very good reasons for it. It’s none of our business and none of our concern. Simple as that. You’ll understand, in time.’ Jesse turned to type something on the keyboard to his right. When he was finished, his gaze fell on Mercer again. ‘I get that it’s distressing at first, believe me, I felt the same.

But you just need to turn that part of your brain off. Stop thinking about it as a little girl, because it’s not. It never was. As much as it might look like

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one, you need to remind yourself: it’s a specimen; a laboratory experiment. Nothing more. The sooner you do that, the better.’

Mercer let out a low, steady breath. The girl was grabbing at her head now, he noted.

She looked distressed. His heart dropped at the thought of his own daughter; she’d only just started grade school. How old was this girl? He considered it for a brief moment.

No. She isn’t a real girl, he tried weakly, then sighed. He couldn’t do it. She looked too real; moved too real. How could Jesse and the others act so blindly? He closed his eyes to the reality of it.

STAND BY. SPECIMEN APPEARS TO BE EXPERIENCING HEIGHTENED CEREBRAL ACTIVITY. DEACTIVATING FOR FURTHER ANALYSIS. STAND BY FOR IMMEDIATE SHUT DOWN.

He looked up. The girl appeared to be crying, arms wrapped around herself in a sort of hug. Then a moment later a stiff lurch threw her forward and onto her hands and knees. Then another, and another. It took thirty seconds before she passed out. Mercer stared at the bandaged girl on the floor, unable to turn away. She was coiled up on her side now, her hands still gripping at her stomach. Thick streams of tears stained her face.

Mercer thought about his own daughter and hated himself. Then he threw up.

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