College Tribune | November 25th 2008
Regulars News
18
THE
RANDOM
REVIEW
THIS WEEK:
68%
MEN
door open for you?” They have their own version of being cruel. “You’re pissing me off so I’m going to ignore that date we were meant to have.” What is most important to remember at the end of the day is the extra being that exists within a man- yes, his ego. It’s big, it’s bold… and it’s delicate. With this, extreme care is needed. Protestations not to care are simply protestations, and if you start comparing them to an ex you can potentially crush the ego for life, at which point they will certainly retreat into recovery zone where they will lick their wounds, and in comparison to a woman going out on the town, they will “go out with the lads” and meet some “buzzer” which translates to moping over a pint and going home early. They are readable, and despite our frequent misgivings, a big part of our lives. Their most fatal flaw? A tendency to forget exactly how lucky they have it. Pay heed, scurrilous species, these are words of wisdom.
M DO NI REAV EW
THE
Next issue, you can hit back with a random review of women, but for now, get used to the fact that this is a random review on the curious male species. Complicated in their simplicity, cold-hearted in their own warm way, this is one of the most contradictory species that ever was. God in his infinite wisdom created this being first, obviously because it took a lot longer to programme the ways of a man. They are the ultimate mystery of a conundrum, the most enigmatic riddle of a puzzle. Of course, all of the above is absolutely tripe. Men are fundamentally simple. They don’t think with their brain, and they like their messy space where they “know where everything is”. This is not to say they don’t operate in mysterious ways, they do. One whisper of the word commitment and cue mass scarpering for the hills. Say the words no-strings fun and all of a sudden you’re the one. They have their own version of what it is to be kind. “I told you that you looked well yesterday” or “Remember that time I held the
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