The College Tribune Issue 11 by Simon

n e r i S the

speaks with ....

White Lies

Exclusive interviews with Enda Kenny, Ruairi Quinn and other political figures Pg 12-15

College Tribune ucd.ie/tribune

The Difference is We’re Independent

Issue 11 | Volume 22 | 17th April 2009

No Confidence: Academic Outcry News

Inside This Issue

Year in review: 2008/2009 The biggest campus stories Page 8&9

!"Jennifer Bray A survey conducted by the College Tribune has revealed a startling slump in confidence for the leaders of UCD. While 70% of staff questioned believe a “new team to lead through tougher times” is now needed, a further blow was dealt for President Hugh Brady

News

Sport

Student outrage as UCD Ball tickets disappear

Exclusive interview with Malcom O’Kelly

Page 3

as morale within the college has plummeted to below average. The majority of academics believe the university is too driven in “the direction of a business”, and UCD is at risk of losing its identity amongst cutbacks and emphasis on outside perception. See Page 4-7.

Also

Page 36&37

!Faustus !The Turbine !Down the Line

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News News

Current Campaigns and Communications Officer Dan O’Neill was last week elected USI Deputy President, polling 174 votes out of a valid 179.

Rise in Campus Residences Fees

UCDSU Pull support on controversial Miss UCD !"Cathy Buckmaster

!"Jennifer Bray On-campus residences fees for next year have been raised despite falling rent prices elsewhere, it has been revealed. Belgrove and Merville have increased from €3952 to €4288, an increase of €336. Meanwhile, Roebuck Hall and Glenomena have increased from €4976 to €5324, an increase of €348. This works

out at an expensive €140 a week, well over average rental price. It is also understood this fee does not include deposit or utilities. The proposed hike came before a Governing Authority meeting a few months ago. The rise is set to cause controversy amidst students already struggling to pay the fees in place. It is further contentious given recent drop in rent prices across the country, with popular listings site Daft.ie claiming costs have dropped by over 12% in 2008 alone. The charges for the campus accommodation were raised for this academic year already. Before the proposals came before the Governing Authority, Entertainments Officer Gary Redmond stated that “Given the falling rent prices and the high cost of living, it is not right that students should be subjected to yet another inflation in price.

College Tribune LG 18, Newman Building (Arts Block) or Box 74, Student Centre, UCD Email: collegetribune@gmail.com Tel: 01 716 8501 Editor Jennifer Bray Deputy Editor Sports Editor Music Editor Health & Fashion Editor Features Editor

Cathy Buckmaster Jordan Daly Sebastian Clare Aoife Ryan Philip Connolly

Design by

Charles O’Donnell Philip Connolly Jennifer Bray

A freeze needs to be put in place so this cannot happen”. There has been no action on this ‘freeze’. Currently the cost of living on campus stands at between €4,000 and €5,000 on the five main campus spots: Belgrove, Merville, Roebuck, Glenomena and Proby. It has been suggested the proposed spike in fees is due in part to the costs incurred in the construction of new security gates around all residences. These gates have been met with uproar and protest from students. Last semester saw a showdown between security officers and Students’ Union officials as attempts to force the new measures upon students without consultation failed.

The controversial Miss UCD pageant took place on April 15th without the support of the UCD Students’ Union due to a “non-negotiation of terms”. The Pageant judges women based on criteria including beauty, talent and personality. It first took place in 2007 after being sponsored by tabloids such as News of the World and The Sun as well as the UCD SU. Controversy surrounded Miss UCD last year when both the contest and the SU came under huge scrutiny after a large number of students staged protests due to its antifeminist ethos; the winner of Miss UCD gets automatic entry into Miss Ireland and as a result, the contest bans all mothers, wives and women under 5’4 from entering.

Contributors

Katie Godwin, Gerard Casey, Eoghan Glynn, Colman Hanley, John Flynn, Kev Doyle, Eoin Boyle, Jessica Whyte, Aoife Smyth, Fiona Redmond, Nicholas Broadstock, Max Harding, Helen O’Sullivan, Faustus, Heather Landy, Victoria Taylor, Laura Butler,

Special thanks to...

Frank, Huw and Mark at NWM, Amy and Chantal at Universal, Danielle, Colm and Rory at MCD, Patrick Stewart at the IFI, David Cadden at the Abbey, Eva at Red Lion, All who took the time to fill out this issue’s Academic Survey, Sharon and Joseph Bray, Sarah Furlong, Eileen Gahan, James Grannell and Peter Lahiff.

Ents officer Gary Redmond commented on why the SU pulled their backing. “Due to the unsuccessful completion of negotiations regarding several aspects of the proposed Miss UCD competition, UCDSU were unable to promote or manage the event for this year.” Campaigns and Communication officer Dan O’Neill who has been openly against the pageant had this to say on this issue. “The UCD Students’ Union were not involved in organizing the event this year. When it initially went to council as to where the union stands on running the pageant, I spoke out against it at the time.” “But the council decided that the UCD SU would organise one which hasn’t happened. This was being organised by a society in UCD and it’s nothing to do with the Students’ Union”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News

Students accuse Union of “hoarding” UCD ball tickets

! Jennifer Bray A number of students have expressed concern about the overnight sell-out of UCD Ball tickets, claiming the tickets were not made available to them. A representative for the Students’ Union shop stated at least 100 student per day were enquiring as to the fast sell-out and unavailability. “We’ve had students come in looking for tickets every day since they went on sale two weeks ago. Most of them are angry they cannot attend an event supposedly set up for them, and are demanding to know where the admissions have gone.” UCD Students’ Union President Aodhán Ó Deá has dispelled suggestions tickets were being ‘horded’ by this year’s Ents crew for personal use and for friends. “The popularity of this year’s UCD Ball is unprecedented and the short time period in which tickets sold out was utterly unexpected. It is unfortunate that a high number of students are without tickets, however

the total sale capacity of 4,500 was agreed by the Students’ Union, university officials, Dublin Fire Brigade, the Gardaí and the HSE. This figure was recommended to us by the event management company assisting with the UCD Ball. All tickets went on sale on Wednesday 1st April at 10am, and sold out only a few hours later.” According to O Deá, following the complete selling-out an emergency meeting took place between involved stakeholders in which the capacity could not be pushed “due to health and safety reasons.” “UCD Ents is here to ensure that every student has a great time on campus, but the safety of students is paramount and we could not ethically, or legally, push capacity beyond acceptable safety limits” However it is understood that tickets have been distributed free of charge to Class Reps “as thanks for their hard work and dedication throughout the year, which is often unnoticed.” Sabbatical officers receive tickets, as do university officials such as the VicePresident for Students. Support staff associated with the various acts, along with advertisers and sponsors, also receive tickets. No tickets were made available to the Ents Crew as they will be working for the entire duration of the ball.

UCD’s Dramsoc wins again at ISDA !"Sarah Doyle UCD’s Dramsoc this month ventured to Limerick to represent the university at the Irish Student Drama Association (ISDA) Festival. The event, hosted this year by University of Limerick (UL), saw Dramsoc members spending a week performing in front of judges and other competing students. Dramsoc, one of UCD’s most active societies, picked up four awards and ten nominations, continuing past successes for another year running. “It was a great week,” said out-going Dramsoc Auditor Conor McKenna. “We did really well getting the four awards and ten nominations, but even just to be there with other universities was brilliant.” Limerick was treated to four competing Dramsoc productions, including Steven Berkoff’s highly acclaimed ‘East’; Dorota Maslowska’s

‘A Couple of Poor Polish Speaking Romanians’, directed by Lisa Carroll; ‘Twelve Angry Men’, by Reginald Rose, and ‘The Last Romantic’, an original script written and directed by Dramsoc’s Adam Jenkinson. ‘Twelve Angry Men’, directed by Elizabeth Chappel and James McNulty, picked up three awards, including Best Ensemble, Best Costume and MakeUp, and Best Supporting Actor for Matthew Kelly, who also performed the lead role in ‘The Last Romantic’. The Spirit of the Festival award went to Colm Mahon, who starred as ‘Mum’ in ‘East’ and also performed as a jury member in ‘Twelve Angry Men’. There was some disappointment among the ranks, with three of Dramsoc’s productions missing out on awards, notably the fantastic ‘East’, directed by Anna Simpson, last year’s winner of the Best Ensemble award for ‘Messiah’. Notable performances by Colm Kenny-Vaughan for ‘East’

and Finbarr Doyle for ‘Twelve Angry Men’ also missed out on awards, despite huge impact. Conor McKenna also took a final bow with memorable performances in ‘Twelve Angry Men’ and ‘The Last Romantic’. There was some contention around the high price of admission into competing shows with students having to pay €8 per show, but spirits remained high despite this. The ISDA Festival is an intervarsity event that sees performances from several third-level institutions and universities competing for recognition among fourteen categories, including Trinity; DCU; DIT; Limerick IT; UCC and University of Limerick. The awards, ruminated upon by a panel of three judges working within the Irish drama scene, are highly coveted in the realm of student drama, recognising the talent and effort that goes in to creating successful productions.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News News

Academic Survey The College Tribune surveyed just under 40 academics in the College to gain a fair and proportionate representation of staff opinion and morale. The survey was carried out across all departments and schools, from professors to members of university committees. The survey was anonymous, and was sent to over 200 staff altogether.

THE REsults 37% The Direction of UCD

When queried upon whether the university was too driven in the direction of a business, 37% stated they believe this is the case. This question was criticised by some academics as being “leading”, but recent reports such as the Mercator Report revealed a sense of dissatisfaction at a new business ethos introduced over the previous few years.

4.3 Morale within the college

75% A change in emphasis 75% of staff agreed with the assertion that emphasis within the college has shifted from teaching to research. “This is a very foolish shift”, pointed out one member of staff. “Where are our researchers going to come from? We need to teach people the foundations of their subjects, before they are ready to research and create new knowledge, but there is plenty of old knowledge which we as researchers have spent many years acquiring that needs to be passed on to the next generation. Linking in with the new

focus on research is the recent announcement by Trinity College Dublin and UCD of a “research merger” which will see the two combine resources to excel in this field. It has also been speculated this will create dozens, if not hundred, of jobs. However, the survey shows the vast majority do not feel this is of any significance, or do not feel well enough informed. 59% do not believe the “merger” is feasible, or realistic. “Too much has been made of this and there is little understanding about this”, stated one doctor.

This is one area which showed remarkable response. When asked on their feelings on the structural changes in the university, the following remarks were noted. “I am depressed with this, and I am exhausted also.” “My feelings are of overwhelming depression.” “I feel the whole structural change and even modularisation is a wasted oppportunity.” “An absolute disaster”

“Overall, a good idea. Positive” “I feel largely negative towards this. Students should have fewer modules and more depth.” “The changes and alterations have had negative impacts on academic standards” On a scale of one to ten, the average morale of staff in their departments is 4.3. Some expressed their despair by marking a score as low as ‘one’.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News

70% A New Team?

3.5

Leadership On a scale of one to ten, staff members on average rated the performance of president Hugh Brady at 3.5. This is sure to be of surprise to the president who has enjoyed national accredation for upping UCD’s stakes in the much-hyped league tables. While some rated the president as highly as ‘8’, others feel far less enchanted. Those who expressed issue with the president believe there are areas of his tenure which go, unorthodoxically, uncriticised right down to graduation speeches. “One aspect of the President’s performance has never been commented on, but I think needs to be drawn to attention, and this issue is his graduation speeches. I’ve heard endless variations of the same

theme at these graduation ceremonies. After students are awarded their degrees, he comes to the podium, and addresses them, their parents and friends- on the sweeping successes of his regime as president of UCD! “That is an insult to the hard work and sacrifice of all these students and their families. It’s their day, a time for them to start putting their university experience behind them and building their careers and yet he spends the twenty minutes or so during which they are a captive audience by rubbing their faces in his agenda. Whatever happened to valedictorian adresses such as Baz Luhrmann’s “wear sunscreen?” Some advice for later life? Even just a “so long, farewell, great to have had you around?”.

70% of academics and staff assert the time has come to be led by a new team “through the tougher times”.

Part of this reason is attributed to a distinct lack of communication between the top levels of the college with these staff. Indeed, an overwhelming 92 % claim there is not enough communication with the president and the staff around him on matters of academic and otherwise importance. “Consultation, UCD style, involves the

president and his team saying, “This is what we want. Make it so!”. Communication should be bottom up, that is, staff who are doing the work on the ground should have first input into proposed reforms.” Another member of staff said “there certainly is no consultation, it is a myth that we are asked opinions any longer.”

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College Tribune | April 2nd 2009

News News News News

They’re coming... #"Katie Godwin UCD student residences will undergo a TV-licence spot-check in the coming months according to a spokesperson from An Post. The exact date of the investigation could not be revealed however the spokesperson advises students to act immediately as it is likely to occur this April. Students without a licence are liable to be fined up to 2000 euro and/or face a court appearance. To avoid inconvenience, students are advised to purchase a TV licence as soon as possible. The licence costs 160 euro and can be paid for online at www.tvlicence. ie. However many students cannot afford the licence and they feel it is too expensive. Sinead Barret, a first year resident in Belgrove residences spoke to the Tribune

on the matter “It’s definitely too dear for students, I know I wouldn’t be able to afford it and there are a few of my friends who might get caught.” According to inspectors who check for the licenses, these are the most used student excuses: !"I thought my parents’ TV Licence would cover me !"I haven’t got a TV. I watch telly on my laptop !"I’m an A star student. They’re not going to prosecute me !"I didn’t know I needed a TV Licence in a hall of residence !"I live in a shared house. It’s not my TV !"I’ve got a TV Licence. I just can’t find it at the moment.

Cleaning staff halved Too much emphasis on #"Tribune perception and a Reporter “glossy image”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009 UCD Student in Students occupy TransLecturer’s local elections perceptions and thoughts as

regards students port Department

81% 81% of staff surveyed believe student attendance has dwindled.

PhD student and History tutor Bryce Evans is running as a candidate for the People Before Profit Alliance in the Pembroke-Rathmines ward. He is the only UCD student to be running in the local elections on June 5th. “If students vote for me they are voting for a fellow student who understands their issues. There needs to be a young, left-wing voice on Dublin City Council,” he says. Evans’s rival is graduate Garret Tubridy (FF), brother of chat show host Ryan. Asked to comment on Tubridy, Evans said “he has no policies and no ideas but he will always have those Tubridy looks, I suppose’.

News in Brief UCD, Trinity research

university than making it a reality. 88% of staff are of merge this mind-set..

#"Jennifer Bray One interviewee pointed towards the evidence of a survey carried out in his A group of students last week school on the topic. “ Attendance has staged an occupation of the Dedwindled, in fact it is alarming. We partment of the Transport in prodid a survey in my school last year. test to the increasing likelihood of 40% attendance at level 1, 50% at the re-introduction of fees. level two, and 60% at level three. Approxiamtely thirty students enI make Herculean effort in my own tered the building and proceeded Level 2 lectures, but can still only to preacefully protest on the issue. drag out a maximun of 75%.” According to UCD Students’ “I sat in my office this morning waitUnion president Aodhán Ó Deá, ing for a 10’O Clock class. No one the occupation took place as a concame, not one soul. It’s heartbreaktinuation of USIs programme of ing for us, to put our hearts and souls direct action. “UCDSU supported into thinking of creative and engaging the occupation and sent approximately 25 students along on the day. It is understood that a large number of gardaí entered the building shortly before 2pm and the occupation ended peacefully just after four O’Clock. “The protest took place to show the Minister for Education that we will not back down and continue to do

ways to pass on knowledge- real enlightening human experience- to find that so few of you care to receive it.” Further comments indicate a bitterness linking non-attendance with the student fight against fees. “I can see why you’re so agitated about fees. Many of you don’t use the services that are put in front of you already, even though the government and taxpayer is paying a very pretty penny for them. Imagine if you had to pay for your education yourselves, and were wasting your own money by not showing up!” whatever it takkes to stop any form of fees being introduced,” said O Deá. USI will soon unveil its plans to mobilise the votes of Ireland’s 200,000 students to vote against parties that support fees in the upcoming Local elections and in particular the Dublin South By-election.

UCD applies for ‘Charles Institute’ #"Jennifer Bray

News recently emerged concernA planning application has been subing the research merger which has mitted by the college to build what those willing to do this will keep been arranged between Ireland’s is known as the ‘Charles Institute’, a their jobs. It is thought that they top two universities, UCD and postgraduate research centre. are expecting to cut half of the TCD. The merger will allow postAccording to a spokesperson for the number of current cleaning staff graduate students to take modules college, “It is dedicated to research this way. and study at the two universities in skin conditions and the training “This could be really bad for the and will almost certainly raise of health professionals in dermatol- Site: For yet another institute college and it’s hygiene standard, UCD’s stock and world rankings. ogy. The Charles Institute is largely the place would be a mess”, one The TCD / UCD Innovation Allifundeditfromthe Board ofathe City of learning areas and toilet areas. UCD made news headlines again this year when witnessed jump in position on the THES UniverISS worker commmented. “And ance is a fundamental partnership Dublin Skin and Cancer Hospital from Ancillary storage areas, plant areas many of the ISS staff depend on whichStaff will work with thethe statemain and part, the sale ofthe Street these Hospitaltables sity League Tables. are, for split onHume whether are offacilities any importance. and shower shall also be lotheir jobs.” the education sector, and the busisite, with other funding from the uni- cated at ground floor level. According to a spokesperson for ness andvital venture communi37% believe they are tocapital the perception of a college. versity” It is understood that the link to the the college, the reason for the job ties to create a world-class ecosysThe site is generally located between Health Sciences Building incorporates losses is due to contractual mat- administration “The current comically about UCD’s place in the world. Our as a unitem for innovationisthat will drive insecure the Conway Institute on its east and re-modelling of therole existing O’Briens ters as opposed to explicit cuts. enterprise development and the the Health Sciences Building to the cafe facility at ground floor level. versity be dictated by what need to offer to the nation of Ireland, and our consideration of “The cleaning contract wasshould tencreation of sustainable highwe value South. The development will also include redered in 2006 for a period of jobs. The joint effort hopes to genconsist be of a wholly new instatement of existing site structures, with respect to Harvard, CambridgeTheordevelopment whoeverwill should secondary.” three years and our thereplace has been erate up to 300 companies and pos4 storey over ground research facil- provision of cycle parking areas and no change to the tender arrangesibly thousands of jobs in ten years. ity comprising laboratory facilities, site lighting. ments.” conference rooms, meeting facilities, communal informal meeting areas,

!"College hygeine standards to ‘drop’

One of the main findings of the questionnaire is that Half of UCD’s cleaning staff are those quizzed more set to be let go, itbelieve is now claimed. effort put company into presenting The is cleaning contracted the bycollege ashave a world-class UCD, ISS, been warned of cutback proposals by the university authorities. These were confirmed in a m–eeting on Monday 23rd March in the Newman building which was attended by all ISS staff in UCD. A number of changes were proposed, including the change of cleaning hours. At present most of the buildings in UCD are cleaned from 5am until 8am in the morning. UCD has suggested that this be changed to evenings, from 5pm to 9pm. The college authorities have stressed that only

88%

The University League Tables

88%

O’Briens Irish Sandwhich Bars, UCD Offer you the chance to win two tickets to Bruce Sprinsteen RDS 11th July, 2009 To enter the draw, write your name and mobile number on the back of your receipt and place the entry box provided in either of the Health Science or Architecture sandwhich bars. The closing date for entries is 6pm, Friday 1st May 2009. The draw will take place the week of 4th of May 2009. The winner will be notified by phone. The winners name will be displayed in both sandwhich bars for one week. Please note these are seated tickets in Anglesea Stand. PS Why not try our new range of hot meals sold in microwavable container. They can be purchased cold and heated in the evening. You could also try our new range of eclairs and custard slice.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News

70% of lecturers do not find their students to be motivated enough

70% Overall in terms of the reintroduction of college fees, university staff are split down the middle. Just over 50% are in favour of Education Minister Batt O’Keeffe’s proposals, but quoting that as long as they are in the form of “some kind of graduate tax” or “loans system” One memo on this question stated “I would be for the implementation of tuition fees but with many provisos. First of all, I’ve been there too. I’ve spent months living off noodles and baked beans and wondering if I could afford 50p for the bus. I know first hand about student poverty, and I’ve no desire to make it worse for anyone. But your education costs money. It’s money that someone has to find right . I can’t afford

Many lecturers and staff expressed deep dissatisfaction with to wait until you have graduated and are earning a decent wage to receive my salary. I can’t buy equipment for classrooms with the promise to pay for it in 20 years.” The overwhelming majority are also resigned to the fact that many graduates will have to leave Ireland in order to secure a full time job in their chosen field.

50%

students who they feel are “only going to college for the sake of going to college”, or going because “It’s what you do.” However, the lack of drive is emanating from both sides. “The lack of motivation of students, non-attendance at class etc is profoundly depressing” remarked another staff member. He continued: “Management have lost the plot being cumbersome, bureaucratic & expensive. To both the students and staff remember: they are completely indifferent to what staff and students think .I hope to leave.”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News News

The Year in Review

We chat to Hollywoodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s busiest man

Seth Rogen

FRESHERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GUIDE PAGE 11

FRESHER GUIDE S

Issue 1 | Volume 22 | 16th September 2008

DISMISSED ! STI shock doc fails to back-up claims that UCD is a â&#x20AC;&#x153;sex-infection hotspotâ&#x20AC;? ! â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve utterly no evidence to suggest that students at UCD are more at risk than anywhere elseâ&#x20AC;? One of the countriesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; leading STI experts, Dr Derek Freedman, who recently claimed that UCD was a â&#x20AC;&#x153;sex-infection hotspotâ&#x20AC;?, has admitted that he has â&#x20AC;&#x153;utterly no evidence to suggest that UCD is at more risk than anywhere else.â&#x20AC;? In July, a national Sunday newspaper reported â&#x20AC;&#x153;booze culture turns UCD into sex infection hotspotâ&#x20AC;?. Last week, the Sunday paper ran a front page story alleging that a UCD student had performed oral sex in exchange for a cigarette. Both reports were focused on the testimony of the STI specialist claiming that one in ten UCD students screened, or â&#x20AC;&#x153;three times the national averageâ&#x20AC;?, had tested positive for Chlamydia. But Dr Sandra Tighe of the UCD Student Health Service has said that the actual number of people testing positive for Chlamydia at UCD was 4%, as opposed to the 10% suggested by Freedman. Stating that no study had been

! Karina Bracken done nationwide to reveal the prevalence of Chlamydia, she said that a study in Britain showed 10% of people testing positive. Tighe emphasised that this in fact made UCD well below average for Chlamydia further saying â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve no idea where doctor Freedman got his figures from.â&#x20AC;? When questioned about his figure of 10%, Dr Freedman admitted that it was â&#x20AC;&#x153;a bit tongue in cheekâ&#x20AC;?. He could not pinpoint where exactly he had obtained the figure, at first saying that he believed the information to originate from the Well Woman Clinic, and then the Student Health Service at UCD. The Well Woman Clinic failed to confirm or deny this at the time of going to print. The Health Service at UCD adamantly asserts that they gave out no such information.

Issue 1: Dismissed After a comment in a national Sunday newspaper claiming that booze culture has turned UCD into a sex infected hotspot, The College Tribune interviewed

the man behind the claims. Leading STI specialist Dr. Derek Freedman admitted it was â&#x20AC;&#x153;a bit tongue in cheekâ&#x20AC;? and couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t pinpoint where he got his figures before eventually stating that he had â&#x20AC;&#x153;utterly no evidence to suggest that UCD is more at

risk than anywhere else.â&#x20AC;? Freedman also went on to say that studentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s are not having quality sex after a few pints, his exact words; â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s masturbating in a vagina.â&#x20AC;?

Âť Continued on page four

Issue 3: Boozy reps run riot The Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union came under scrutiny when The College Tribune reported about the huge damages caused during Class Rep train-

ing. Thousands of euro worth of damage was caused after the students drank excessively and destroyed their lodgings making to company vow that they were never allowed back. UCD SU President AodhĂĄn Ăł DeĂĄ

was so offended by the article he pulled all SU advertising from the College Tribune. As a result of the story, Vice President for students Martin Butler also launched an investigation into the trip.

Issue 4: Give it back Brady In October The College Tribune broke the story stating the HEA confirmed that a resolution arrived at one university top brass previously

in receipt of unauthorised allowances. Hugh Brady was among them receiving a beneficiary to the allowance of 12,000. The HEA stated they allowances were

not permitted and had to be paid back. However, the development left the door open for a 19% increase in Bradyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s salary.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News

!"#$%&'#'"()% !**)

Issue 5: Dire warning issued over UCD gay cruising After thorough investigations the College Tribune found startling evidence to suggest that UCD was fast becoming a cruising hotspot. Comments on Squirt.org claimed that the toilets beneath Theatre P and Theatre Q were the most popular are for gay cruising in UCD. The Director of Belong to expressed his worry over the situation claiming that there “was an issue with physical safety” as cruising generally took place at night in secluded areas so the people partaking were “at increased risk of getting attacked.” Issue 5: LGBT Auditor insists no apology needed for costume After an interview with the College Tribune, UCD LGBT auditor Sean Mcgovern refused to apologise for inappropriate Halloween costume. He chose to dress as an aborted foetus claiming that he got the idea one night when someone “dropped a strawberry daiquiri in front of me.” Issue 6: League tables questioned

UCD students arrested as fees campaign gathers momentum. The College Tribune reported that two students had been arrested and one cautioned as a result of the 150 students gathered to confront Minister Brian Lenihan and protest against fees which

Issue 2: Assault

person commented

concerning students

investigations shake

there had been two

who had been

security.

alleged assaults re-

shouted at and

Gardaí launched an

ported which were

intimidated.

investigation into an

under investigation

alleged assault by

and went on to say

UCD’s new security

that there had been

firm on a prominent

a high number of

student society fig-

complaints about

ure. A UCD spokes-

pulse security

took place outside the Clinton institute in October. The College Tribune also reported on the national protest against the reintroduction of fees which saw 10, 000 students taking to the streets in a protest organised by the USI.

It was reported in November that details emerged suggesting possible inaccuracy in the league tables. During a governing authority meeting, President Hugh Brady was questioned about the legitimacy of the figures he provided for the League Tables. Brady claimed “he wasn’t doing anything other universities in Ireland weren’t doing.” Issue 7: Bike Bandits chased by Cop-ters The College Tribune discovered that Garda cars and a Garda helicopter had been deployed to apprehend bike thieves in a not so high speed chase across campus. Issue 7: What a cushy number It was reported in January that the Students’ Union received 55,000 euro in funding from the college for “chill out areas” in Belfield; 35,000 euro of which was sourced form the student capital fund. Issue 8: SIPTU demand answers for mounting university debt It emerged in February that members of SIPTU were demanding accountability form UCD President Hugh Brady after he announced the College was headed for a possible debt of 20 million euro this year. Some schemes suggested to alleviate the debt included early retirement, voluntary redundancies and pay cuts. Issue 8: 10,000 a day to be stumped in new parking measures The College Tribune also reported this week about the discussions concerning the proposed introduction of parking fees next semester. The proposed system will charge students and staff for parking per hour and will raise a revenue of 10,000 euro a day.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News News

Opinion

FAUSTUS Hope does not Back Supping with the devils Greetings scumlings, After my conspicious absecence from the dastardly halls of UCD, I returned this year not expecting much in the ways of improvement or in the ways of a challenge. As always, this correspondent is correct. Certainly, Tallyrand is to world of analysis and satire what Celia Ahern is to world of literature: pointless. Of course however one must be a fan of our snobserver, it is proven to be thoroughly soft and absorbent . In recessionary times Faustus has saved many a penny on toilet roll. And so students, you bid goodbye to another mutant Students’ Union. You will be glad to hear our president-elect is starting as he means to go on. Both Pulse Security and Unicare are keeping tabs on the boy rider after one too many joyrides around the campus. In his dad’s jeep, Redmond is displaying all the testosterone and culture needed to rival the outgoing president. Never has a bigger ego

wandered the corridors than our Aido. If he isn’t chatting up first years with his intelligent and witty lines ( I’m in all the committees where really important things happen like the UUPB, UGBP, AC ) then he can be found dancing alone on Grafton Street at 4AM. Rumour has it he steals women’s clothingto do what with, Faustus doesn’t want to know. Goodbye to the union and all your little boozy reps. Another year for Hugh Brady also, and he too is as popular as ever. Academics who completed this issue’s survey relished the questionnaires with bared teeth and white knuckles. Brady ought to be very afraid. One staff member was all for chasing our embattled leader across campus with pitch-forks. He says “I’m not even sure Hugh Brady exists. The only time I’ve ever seen him it was like talking with a hologram. Odd.” And that’s what the year has been- odd. And full of the same predictable rubbing of shoulders, snooty suits, horrid hacks and bitchy academics. It’s never going to change, it’s only going to get worse. Adios Filthbags

disappointeven in these times

UCD chaplain and student advisor John McNerney discusses the notion of hope We recently held a conference in the Quinn School of Business on the topic: ‘Hope Does Not Disappoint.’ When coming up with the theme many people said: “Well, hope, yes, we need lots of that in the present circumstances.” Others questioned the whole idea and commented: “OK, yes, there’s a need for hope, but are you really sure that hope does not disappoint?” It’s all too easy, I suppose, in the current situation to move from one extreme to another, that is, from the extreme of exuberance to that of excessive despair. We see all this in the news headlines and hear it in the media. Capitalistic cronyism, Irish style, is collapsing we are told. Business commentators point to a fundamental intellectual mistake as underlying the current financial crisis, that is, an ‘overestimation of the ability’ of financial companies and individuals to manage their risks and understand the financial instruments they operate with. With all their financial innovation, they have, in the words of Warren Buffet unleashed ‘weapons of mass destruction’ upon us. We seem to be in a hopeless situation. But as Emily Dickinson, the American poet says, “hope is [after all] a strange invention.” She describes it as a “patent of the Heart.” It’s when we cannot find hope that if we often put hope; then we will find it. The Danish philosopher, Søren Kierkegaard describes the human drama as constituted by living in this tension of ‘hope against hope.’ I’m reminded of an experi-

e n c e f r o m 9/11 during the attack on the World Trade Centre. We all might recall seeing the horrific pictures on TV. To this day, I remember where I was when I saw the WTC collapse unfold. Two men

“This, stronger than death, brought firemen into buildings because somehow they could concretely express this kind of love” were trapped in an office. One man was a paraplegic. The other man was Jewish. They were in the second tower of the centre and the Jewish man would not leave his friend who was in a wheelchair and run to safety. They called for help on their mobiles. Emergency personnel and firemen were coming to get them. Unfortunately, the building collapsed before they could get out. After the whole tragedy, the family of the paraplegic called the Jewish man’s family. They said they were so sorry— but the other family answered, “No, this is what he believed in.” A Jewish rabbi hearing of

this example commented later that life is the ability to show with your death what it is that you lived for. This love, stronger than death, brought firemen into buildings because somehow they could concretely express this kind of love. It’s a love that binds people together over selfinterest and self-concern and fear. The rabbi went on: “These stories help us see the incredible transforming power of something that is greater than we are. These stories say that love is the strongest force in the universe.” I think that the words of that rabbi put things into perspective, in other words there is a reality “greater than we are.” The French philosopher, Emmanuel Levinas wrote that hope does not refer to a fate or a destiny but rather to the possibility that no ‘fate’ (outcome) is ultimate or decisive. In other words the human person is not just a ‘fly in the bottle’ tossed about by different crises. Hope actually points us beyond ourselves freeing us for real rewards that are not just relative. Prof. Walsh from Catholic University of America, who spoke at our conference, describes hope as not just a sentimental human mood. It’s a way of life since he says, “it is only when love in loving the unlovable goes beyond itself that love can truly be called love.”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

News

Editorial

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College Tribune

Letter from the Editor In keeping with tradition, I would like to take this opportunity to express my thanks and gratitude towards those who made Volume 22 of the College Tribune possible and so memorable. Each person who has invested time and effort in the paper this year has brought their own dynamic and personality into the production, ensuring for a lively and interesting publication. Thank you to Cathy Buckmaster who stepped in as Deputy Editor as well as her position of Arts Editor, Jordan Daly and Bryan Devlin who raised the bar of the sports section to a higher standard with their dedication for interviews and analysis, along with Colman Hanley. Thank you to Sebastian Clare and Aoife Ryan for making

The Siren relevant and vibrant. Philip Connolly, besides introducing a features section that is topical and current has been pivotal in design and levelheadedness. Many thanks to the new designers who took on a task which at times seemed insurmountable; Charles O’Donnell and Kev Doyle. Behind the Editorial team of the College Tribune are the editors emeritus. Without the advice, criticism and help of Peter Lahiff, Daniel McDonnell, Eoin MacAodha, Peter McGuire, Eoghan Rice and the other ex-editors the constant push for a stronger issue would be diminished. I would like to thank all the contributors who sacrificed their time and put a stellar effort into the paper. Your contribution and determination

is much valued both now and in the future. Also, I would like to thank Simon Ward whose presence has been a mainstay in the paper for years. Overall, it has been the patience and tolerance of all the above which has been most appreciated. This is especially in regards to Mark, Huw, Frank and Graham at NWM printing. Thanks to everyone who picked up the College Tribune this year; it is the students and staff of this college who we are here to write for. Editing the College Tribune has been the most challenging and rewarding of experiences, and I hope we produced a newspaper that was stimulating and brought you the news relevant to you. Sincerely, Jennifer Bray

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Academic Survey 2009 The results of the College Tribune Academic Survey 2009 should be of grave concern to the university and those who hold the reins. To use the words unrest and irritation when describing the mindset of those who keep the college moving every day is an emphatic understatement. Blind anger, pivotal in its blindness, coupled with an attitude that can not fathom how this university has put itself in a position of severe debt are the main factors at play. The staff of UCD are rightfully unwilling to accept the run-of-the-mill phrase that these are ‘recessionary times’ as an excuse for the cutbacks which this year crippled every course and every discipline previously valued. University College Dublin is not a buisness. This is something those who are educating the students are straining to emphasise. The university League Tables are of no importance when, on the ground, frustration is boiling over at simple things like not being “allowed” to order more than one book for the course you teach. While research is undoubtedly important, the use of it as an advertisement for UCD cannot be condoned, this is the message. This third level institution is in danger of losing it’s identity amongst the glossy advertisement aspirations of the top brass . This is a warning from those on the ground, and at the helm of the situation which would be foolish to ignore. Confidence in President Hugh Brady has fallen markedly, as has morale. This is even in comparison to other surveys carried out in the past while. The warnings are there, the staff have had their say. Now it is up to those at the top to start something they should have began a long time ago: leading.

Features News

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Features

THE STATE OF THE NATION The College Tribune speaks with some of the countries leading polititians and examines Ireland’s future

With the prospect of fees for incoming students looming on the horizon and thousands of graduates out of work Katie Godwin talks to minister Eamon Ryan to find out if students can seek asylum in the Green’s education and employment policies in the coming months. Although the Green Party are theoretically opposed to the reintroduction of fees, Ryan failed to assure that the Greens will go against Batt O Keeffe’s proposals “we don’t have a pre- determined view on any proposals that the minister of education may be bringing forward” he told the Tribune “it hasn’t come to the government yet and I’m reluctant to give an outright opinion on it until we have the full details of the proposal.” He denied the chance that the Green Party will pull out of government if fees are introduced “We went into government deliberately saying that we wouldn’t be constantly threatening to pull out of government saying we’re out if we don’t get this and we don’t get that”. Ryan

also ruled out the possibility that the Greens will fold over any other given issue and he strongly doubts that there will be an early general election. He explained the reasoning behind this “we think its more effective and your better off arguing and working from within that’s our general approach Its not a time for us to put up our hands and say ‘no, this is too difficult let us out’ we have the responsibility to do whatever we can” Minister Ryan refuted Pat Rabbitte’s claims that the leader of his party was mal-informed about the decision to bail out the banks. Mr Rabbitte accused Gormley as noncommittal in the government’s 440bn investment. “Where was the Minister, Deputy Gormley? He was asleep in bed with his telephone switched off. A

garda had to wake him up to tell him the two Brians had been up all night and had mortgaged the future of the country to save the banking system.” said Rabbitte at a meeting of the Dáil.

“Nobody in the party is asleep, No, wide awake and working to do whatever we can as government” “The job of politics is to explain why we shouldn’t do certain things. its quite subjective sometimes we don’t go out in public and have rows. Nobody in the party is asleep, No, wide awake and working to do whatever we can as government you

couldn’t be asleep at the present time to many important things going on, too many important decisions have to be made and it wouldn’t be in the national interest and he couldn’t be further from the truth.” Ryan admitted that he felt the recession would be ultimately beneficial for the environment and that it will create a more environmentally friendly economy “I think yes firstly the challenges we face is the peak in global oil production and the runaway climate change. And the solutions of those have to be knitted into an economic recovery and it would avoid the boom and bust we’ve seen in recent years and result in better investment and better planning.” However Ryan assured the Tribune that he has been thinking

about the tough budgeting the country is facing as well as cycling around, saving the planet. When questioned about the article in The Irish Times which suggested that the budget was “targeting the young and vulnerable”, he disagreed. “The Budget was not intended to target the young. The issue of the early childhood was a difficult one because you don’t like cutting funds that are benefiting young children but reality was that our social welfare output was so large” “Broadening of taxation especially property taxation and Carbon taxation, As opposed to just taxing labour as we don’t want to be losing jobs. We don’t want to put everything on to income tax”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Features

Definition; Irish begrudgery: ‘A peculiar disease of the Irish which seemingly renders them unable to feel good about the success of their fellows’ Laura Butler takes an alternative look at the Irish media’s reaction to the economic downturn Irish Begrudgery. A nasty disease which has taken hold of our media machine. The symptoms? Sickness which causes the ever heartlessly persistent media to attack and attack those around them, constantly in search of a scapegoat. This venomous approach, has become so horrific that it has unfortunately has led to the utterly tragic deaths of two high profile business men. How much further will it go? The country’s social elite are some of the worst hit, for the bigger you are, the higher the fall. This seems acutely appropriate, we are suffering a major credit crunch after all. Many would assert that this is what the wealthy deserve and they’ve simply got their come-upance. Should one be punished for success in life? Surely suicide is not the price to pay for success? No one deserves an ending like that no matter how deep they are. Console, the national support group helping

Jordan Daly speaks to Fianna Fail TD Charlie O’Connor about how to weather the current politial storm ‘Slowly. The budget this week has created a lot of difficulties and we have to work through that. The priority has to be to support people who have lost their jobs and continue to try to find new jobs.” Rightly or wrongly the current government I caught in the crosshairs of those looking for someone to blame for the countries current instability. “What we are doing now is very similar to the global situation. If you think this is just happening in ireland you just have to switch on Sky News or CNN and there it is everywhere else. I think it’s very important we wouldn’t panic in that regard. The

priority has to be on jobs creation and protection. There will always be political criticism and another point of view but what I want is jobs.” With low polling and a bleak outlook for the countries short term economic future, it would be a brave man to bet on Fianna Fail being head of the next government. “I don’t know how people are going to react. All I can do is continue to work hard on behalf of my communities, and to represent their oponions and to do the job to the best of my ability. I haven’t changed my style in the last couple of weeks. If people want me I’m here, to bounce ideas off. I’m here and if people want to criticise what’s hap-

pening I’m here.” Nor is the government’s latest budget going to endear Fianna Fail any further “I thought it was tough. There were some things I would have preferred not to have happened. But I was pleased that the social welfare payments were main-

those who are ‘living with suicide’, held their national conference on the 2nd April, to discuss how best to influence and decrease the rising suicide rates in Ireland in the present climate. It was mentioned on an afternoon radio programme by Director John Murphy, that the charity-based organsiation has seen an increase in the number of calls being made to its helpline due to the recession; and that there needs to be something done about it. The organisation says the economic downturn is causing an increase in distress and depression as people struggle to cope with redundancy and financial losses. An article published on The Herald the day after the conference noted that ‘High-flying Celtic Tiger executives hit by the recession may be a major suicide risk, it was claimed yesterday. Jobless businessmen are more likely to suffer depression because their self-worth is closely linked to career success.’ Similarily, an article printed by Carl O’Brien in the Irish Times on the 3rd April commented on the Console Naitonal Conference, stating that ‘about 500 people die from suicide each year in Ireland, with some experts predicting this number will increase significantly as a result of stress and depression linked to the recession.’ Forgetting

tained. Disappointed that the christmas bonus wasn’t confirmed and I would be hopeful that some windfall would be found to fund that.” For college students the topic of fees is one many would like to have with a member of Fianna Fail; “I think it is inevitable now that some sort of fees structure will come back, but I feel very strongly that that should be properly means tested, so that only people from affluent families are caught in that particular net. I think we have made some progress in recent times to ensure that young people from areas which traditionally didn’t have huge numbers of University students still have the opportunity for further education, and that the progress we have made in that regard should continue.” “I think we have a situation where a lot of people are contributing to this particular debate. My jury

the bank loans, closed construction sites or ‘disgraced’ names, one should take a fleeting glance at what this ongoing negativity is doing to us all, and occurances already proven to have resulted from it. The impersonal power of the Irish media certainly does little to help the dire situation that we are facing. Watching the news you can’t help but get depressed. Names that we have become so accostumed to hearing repeatedly feature in the headlines, and for the most part it is for genuinely good reason. It seems we all want a group to blame, or better yet, an individual to blame. An article in the ‘Irish Voice’ written by John Spain in 2003, remarked that we, the Irish, are champions of the art of begrudgery. It was a certain case then, and a definitely certain case now. There is a staggering lack of sensitivity from the media in terms of scathing figures of the public, and whilst they would claim it is their job, should we go so far as to say it is their job to ridicule and attack? Did anyone ever stop and think that maybe there’s a slight possibility that the media alters, shifts and even stages instances and events to suit themselves for media coverage?

is out as to what particular system should be used. I do feel in the current economic system that some fees system is inevitable but I do feel that has to be properly administered and we do have to ensure that we don’t prevent people who have been able to go to college in recent years because of the changes, would be allowed to continue to do so.” “ People are entitled to their point of view and there were times in our history when there was a fair enough point to make but I think we are in changed times and there is an argument that many families who can well afford to send their children through college are not paying fees so I think it is fair enough that the department would look at that. The important thing is to make sure we don’t stop people going to college.”

Features News

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

The man who would ruption by Bruce Springsteen, via the medium of ringtone; unfortunately for Kenny only Obama can call on that kind of celebrity clout, he rarely breaks stride in his answers. “I was a member of the government in 94-97 which abolished fees firstly to allow people to go to college who may never have had the chance to go, and secondly to ease the pressure on families, at the time it was costing about 7000 pounds now its 10000euros. So given the circumstances; 370000 out of work, mortgages to be repaid, pressure on all families, what you do?” “If the Irish students are going to compete with their peers around the world then you can’t put obstacles in the way of education, so we say open the gates, abolish the registration fee, have no fees, don’t get involve with loans. When you graduate, get your PRSI number and work, you then make a 30% contribution to the cost of you course between 5 and 10 years, or be more flexible and pay if up front” It’s a plan that has been criticised by both students and politicians, Proinsias De Rossa said it would be “a misuse of the social insurance fund, which is intended to insure people against sickness, disability, accidents, unemployment and

Philip Connolly speaks to Enda Kenny about Fees, graduates and the future.... “What are the choices here, the current structure that you have of fees up front, a loan system or what we propose?” With consistent polling above 30%, Fine Gael are pole position to be the next leaders of this country, Enda Kenny may have much to say about education in the coming years. In the surroundings of Leinster house, Kenny seems at his most comfortable, and speaks with a charm and an authority not always evident in his public appearances. Apart from a brief inter-

support in old age, it should not be used as a sneaky tax on education.” “This situation can’t go on, there’s nothing for nothing in life anymore, but I really do think that our students should have access to universities, secondly that those universities should be of the highest standards to compete.”

We say open the gates, abolish the registration fee, have no fees, don’t get involved with loans “The options are registration fees, fees paid for by parents, grants or loans, however and we would say our option is a third one, the USI president might well say I don’t believe in this but what are doing here is releasing the constraints on going to college; therefore someone from a disadvantaged area, whose parents are unemployed with their mortgage still to be paid, but is brilliant at math would favour a system like these. Open these gates and when you qualify, let them make a contribution.” As the debate about Fee’s goes on, the issue of college expenditure has become more topical; with a deficit in UCD alone standing over 20 million Euros, as the government impose a recruitment ban across the higher education sector

and warned colleges that failure to comply will see them lose funding. “I think there may be money misspent in places, inefficient or badly run faculties, you can’t deny that serious money is required in universities, if you’re going to be able to compete, not every university can be the best at everything they do, you might have to do with the way universities revolve around specialist areas, so I think you need to look at a real shake up with what is the value for the student, how are they measuring up to their peers internationally.” Yet its not only those coming into college who will face harsh realities, with the majority of students facing up to the prospect of graduating into a frozen economy, in a recent survey done by this paper its was found that 60% of students are considering emigration given the current climate. “Where are people going to emigrate to? The options are not that great, as they used to be. What can you do to get graduates into the world of work here; I think you have to be creative with the way you do things. You need efficiency with the way you spend you public service, there is a lot you can do to raise money in a different way.” “ Every council in the country could take on a number of graduates, engineers for example. Even just for experience to start them off, this recession will end in due course and were going to need these people. Look at all the speech and language therapists

and physiotherapist’s , none of them get work in Ireland, so it’s a ridiculous thing to take in young students and not have jobs at the end of it, in a country like this we can equate for that, you are only talking about 4 million people.”

Where are people going to emigrate to? The options are not that great “The department of education is the oldest department we have, it needs to be flexible, energetic and enterprising, the world that students will be dealing with in the next 15 years is going to change, because of genetics and robotics and nano technology and developments in the internet, students will be involved in the design , research and these new discoveries, these are the new jobs for Irish people in the next 20 years, students will be leaders in these areas. “The development in education has to be linked more closely to the areas of technology and business, we need to be riding the wave all the time, to be ahead of the curve.” Education is a way out of the recession, the more people who graduate, generally the better jobs they get, well, the best pension policy you can have is a strong economy and people at work. We have an enormous advantage even given this crisis now; we can become a real force for change and good.”

The Way Forward?............. Philip Connolly speaks to Ruairi Quinn about our ailing economy, and how to move on.

“There is a financial hole in the accounts of universities, and we believe that it should be paid for by general taxation. College fees are only inevitable if you vote for them, if you don’t want fees vote labour. In fairness to Fine Gael they want to pay with a graduate PRSI tax, which we believe in discriminatory because a highly qualified graduate who creates jobs, many of the people who would benefit from his qualifications will not have to pay the extra PRSI.” As Labour’s education spokesman, Ruairi Quinn is man who doesn’t pull many punches. In a varied political career, he has been an outspoken supporter for students and social equality. “Clearly we are opposed to the reintroduction of college fees for undergraduates, there are fees for part time students and graduate students and there is in effect with the increase

in the registration fees for students of 1500, which is more than some fees charged in other countries such as France, which range from 50 up to 500. We believe that there is no such thing as free education, there

“Nobody is saying education doesn’t have a cost, but if you put a barrier such as fees by whatever model you want to use, you’re not going to get the skill level of what by general consensus is what we need to move forward.” are costs involved in going to college.” “There is a fundamental philosophical problem here, one is that we believe in universal service whether that’s national schools, health services and paid for by general taxation, you do charge for a service or a use of service, we don’t believe for example that people should pay specifically for services, like the fire brigade people don’t only pay for it if there house

goes on fire. This is a form of social solidarity, this goes back many years and is part and parcel of the labour party and isn’t shared by the right, by Fianna fail and Fine Gael in some respects, philosophically and politically.” “Nobody is saying education doesn’t have a cost, but if you put a barrier such as fees by whatever model you want to use, you’re not going to get the skill level of what by general consensus is what we need to move forward.” As the finance minister, Quinn presided over one of the most fiscally successful periods in the state’s history, managing to balance the demands of a growing economy while keeping a close control of government spending, with inflation kept at a relatively low level and unemployment rates falling. Yet he is not so impressed with the current government’s handling of the economy. “This is the fourth time the government has tried to fix things; they are out of their depth and frankly in my view incompetent. They are in fundamental denial as they refuse to recognise that are to blame for a lot of the problems that we face, no all but some, the mismanagement of the financial affairs of country, overreliance on construction and property taxes, which minister Leninhan finally admitted in this budget statement, but there hasn’t been a single word of an apology

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

d be king When taking about the future, Kenny is full of optimism; yet as the subject changes to those he opposes, his tone changes. “I think the government has failed to communicate, the stealth tax in the increasing of the registration fees, the grant has failed in a lot of cases. There are things that can be done in many cases. Brian Cowen was quite dismissive of the comment made by the standard and poor’s analyst there words dictate market trends and what’s happening is that those markets are looking at through the prism of the financial institutions and the government, and they trust neither. So what he was saying was we need a change of energy, Ireland is now paying a higher interest rate which has implications for the future. “I think we are being left behind, we have been given 5 years to sort out our deficit problem, out of the 27 countries in the euro zone we are in the most critical position. Neither does he think that the government’s new budget will change much. “There is no confidence, this is the government’s fourth attempt, will families spend, and there is no confidence. The vat should reduce, keep the confidence moving, the tax increases will outweigh cuts in day-to-day spending by three to one this year and by over two to one in the coming three years, this is the wrong direction to take. It is the wrong placing of the Government’s sail if, as the Taoiseach says, it cannot do anything about the wind.” “I think many of the problems

or recognition that they screwed up.” “The fact that we have lost our AAA credit rating is a blow; it’s a reflection on what the international community thinks about Ireland. A lot of this has got to do with the reputation we have given ourselves, unfortunately the behaviour of Irish business people in some sectors, conveys an impression of croney capitalism and insiders

“Tuhey are out of their depth and frankly in my view incompetent. They are in fundamental denial as they refuse to recognise that are to blame for alot of the problems that we face” secret trading. It may be comfortable to be inside that circle but if we expect the outside world to do business with us we have to be clear and honest in our dealing with each other.” As both labour and fine Gael lead in polls and Fianna Fail’s stock plummets, perhaps we will see Mr. Quinn back in government sooner rather than later. “Change of government is the way out of this. Fianna Fail have been there for twelve years they inherited an economy from a labour Fine

are coming from tiredness, if you are too tired you are not as sharp as you should be, people just don’t want to do business in the country at the moment while the regulation problems are going on. When they see police going into a people’s bank, we have to deal with it. Change the personnel, get on with it. If we don’t change we won’t get the level of trust international markets should have in the country, and therefore money borrow by

It is the wrong placing of the Goverment’s sail if it cannot do anything about the wind. banks can’t be paid back, your money. “The government has been looking for constructive suggestions for a long time, and while they welcomed suggestions they didn’t do anything with it. You can’t fix the jobs crisis unless you fix the banks, you can’t use the banks unless you fix the public finances. So it’s a three legged stool, and a key element is job creation and job retention, you have to encourage people to take on new employees, abolish the PRSI for them, reduce vat. “Give an incentive, then people get confidence, one helps the other. Government can sort out the banks, say this is the new regime, and with respect to them all, clean out the top management.”

Gael and democratic left as it was at the time, we were the second most competitive economy in Europe, we were creating a thousand jobs a week and we exported services, and they have simply blown it, they refuse to recognise they have screwed up the economy and they are in denial, and so long as they are in denial they can’t fix the problem.” “Fianna Fail have always put the party before the country, if we had a general election now, it would be over in a matter of weeks and we would have a decent government.”

“Change of government is the way out” For graduates, Quinn thinks that while the future may be frosty, there is a way forward; “There should be some greater transparency with the way financial matters in universities are dealt with. There is a problem and I don’t think the government are doing enough in relation to it. There were mentions of some programmes in the budget but the details are not yet available in any significant way and there is no proposal by the minister for education. There should be a graduate apprentice programme, which would be a mixture of work experience and minimum pay part time work.” With hard times ahead for this island, there are few more experienced to handle the countries education, and thus perhaps, its future.

Features

Features News

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Let us forget Let usnever never Forget On the 20th anniversery Philip Connolly looks back at the Hillsborough Disaster, that still resonates as if no time had passed On Wednesday it will be 20 years since Hillsborough. Hillsborough. The word now has a power and life all of its own. No longer just the name of Sheffield Wednesday’s ground, now a byword for tragedy, for death. 96 dead. 766 injured. Those numbers still shock you cold. There’s no forgetting Hillsborough at any time in any football season; the very idea that you should meet your death at a football match is still too shocking, too abhorrent, and too unnatural to allow anyone who witnessed the events of April 15 1989 to forget that day. Seeing people fighting for life only to be crushed to death is a vile, grisly sight made all the more hideous when it happens not in a war zone or in battle but at a place of sport, of passion and joy. However, the 20-year anniversary gives us an opportunity to pause from the fripperies and pettiness of our daily football lives, to bow our heads in a moment of sorrow and consider how we got to Hillsborough and its effect on football in this country.

There’s no space here to go over the awful events of that day, we all know of the various controversies and the vile nonsense Kelvin McKenzie put in the Sun, a paper still not sold in Liverpool to this day, but it changed football in Britain from top to bottom. Some of us were far too young to remember the terrible events of that April day, and attend football games blissfully ignorant of the dangers once associated with watching the beautiful game. The disaster touched Liverpool as a city that few outside the city can truly understand. Seeing a normally jovial scouser talking of Liverpool, the emotional attachment to his club and city, as if he speaks of the death of a friend of relative, indeed many actually are, is a sobering experience. Indeed my own scouse grandfather, speaking with such reverent tones and held back emotion is something that lives on in my memory, of an event I will never really understand. It’s right that we should all pay quiet thoughtful respects to those who died, those who were injured and those who lost loved ones, not just out of basic humanity, but because in a very real sense, those people who so tragically died saved many others a similar fate.

It forced grounds to become safer, it made the police learn how to deal with crowds. It probably even made fans behave better. Violence and racism began a long decline. Today’s football is accompanied by the same extreme emotions of joy and despair from the stands and still nobody likes the referee. But the sense of intimidation is no longer there. The worst elements have been priced out and policed out and now write books that recall the good old days of terrace punch-ups with an affection not widely shared at the time. Yet the game needs to re-

main on its guard. Last October there was a pitch invasion at Sunderland at the end of their game with Newcastle and only last weekend a referee, Mike Dean, suffered a gashed forehead when he was struck by a coin at Cardiff. The 22 people who died when ticketless fans stormed an entrance to the stadium during a recent World Cup qualifier between Ivory Coast and Malawi were an awful reminder of what can happen if there is no crowd control. Hillsborough had crowd controllers in 1989, but those controlling the controllers did not do their

jobs properly. It was an awful way to bring spectator safety and comfort up to date and the pain of that day lingers on even at 20 years’ distance. Yet still those who lost loved ones search in vein for answers. The disaster was caused by police mis-managment, yet no one has really been held to account. As one who lost a loved one recently put it “I don’t like to use the word justice,vI prefer to say that we want the full truth, and accountability. Even now, it would make a difference, alleviate some of the hurt and betrayal we have suffered for 20 years.”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Features

A hidden history of UCD Part Seven: Charles Haughey Sam McGrath retells a dusty tale buried in the UCD analls Many people may be aware that Charles Haughey, former Fianna Fail leader and three times Taoiseach attended UCD. However what is more intriguing and less well known is that as a UCD student he instigated a riot during Victory in Europe Day (VE Day) celebrations in1945 in Dublin’s City Centre and as Taoiseach his visit to Belfield in 1989 was marred by disturbances by protesting U.C.D. students. In this issue of Hidden History, we look at this controversial UCD alumnus and his role at both starting and attracting trouble. On May 7th 1945, Trinity College Dublin (TCD) students staged “an impromptu celebration” after the BBC announced the unconditional surrender of Nazi Germany and the end of Adolf Hitler’s Third Reich. The Irish Times reported that fifty students appeared on the roof over the main entrance, waving Union Jacks and singing “God Save the Queen”, “Rule Britannia” and the French national anthem. These proceeding attracted hundreds of onlookers and members of the public. This crowd increased when the Trinity students hosted a Union Jack, a Red Flag, the French tricolour and at the bottom of the mast, an Irish tricolour. A section of the crowd in and around College Green took exception to the position of the Irish flag and made three attempts to break into the University. They

rushed the front gates and made it through the main entrance but were stopped by a large number of Guards from entering the College courtyard. In reaction, Trinity students took down the Irish flag, set it on fire and threw it from the roof. News of this commotion and the actions of the Trinity students reached students in UCD who were then based less than five minutes away in Earlsfort Terrace (where the National Concert Hall is now based). UCD Commerce student Charles Haughey organised a

counter demonstration and led a march of UCD students, some bearing Nazi swastika flags, to Trinity. It is then widely believed that Haughey with a friend, Seamus Sorohan, who was then a law student and later became a barrister, ripped down a Union Jack flag that was hanging on a lamppost at the bottom of Grafton Street and proceeded to burn it. It is then reported that this large crowd of up to a thousand young men marched up to the corner of Middle Abbey Street where they held a public meeting. A man, who described himself as a student of the National University, said they did not object much to the Union Jack being hoist by Trinity College, “because they all knew the outlook of these people” but they objected

strongly to a number of flags being hoist over Trinity with the Irish Tricolour “insultingly on the bottom”. The group then marched to Trinity College headed by a “young man waving a large tricolour hoisted on the shoulders of comrades”. Though almost impossible to prove now both these references of a “student” and “young man waving a tricolour” may be of Haughey. At reaching Trinity, several young men “scrambled up on the railings” carrying Irish flags and were partly across when a force of Garda drew their batons and attacked the students. There were three or four baton charges before “the vicinity of the College was cleared”. Twelve people had to be treated at Mercer’s Hospital for slight injuries. A section of the crowd broke away and later stoned the residence of the British representative and the offices of the United States Consul-General. Fast forward to May 1989, Charles Haughey as Taoiseach was visiting the UCD Belfield Campus to lay the foundation stone for a new £8 million student residence. His presence on campus prompted a

protest of up to a hundred students. In conversation this week with Andrew Fleming a student at the time who was present that day, he outlines that the protest was against “education cuts and an increase in tuition fees” which were taking place against a backdrop of a severe eco-

nomic recession. (Sound familiar!) Fleming goes on to remark that at the time “Haughey was telling us we all had to tighten our belts” while, as it turned out he was “buying himself 700 pound shirts in Paris”. The Irish Times reports that the “gardai moved in to push

students out of (Haughey’s) path” and were forced to form a protective barrier around him. Students chanting “Education, not emigration” sat on the road leading from the site, blocking the Taoiseach’s car from leaving. The police dragged away those students involved in the sit down protest and the Taoiseach’s driver took an alternative route, driving at high speed and pursued by students. When questioned by journalists over the students actions, Haughey quipped that “We did it better in my day”. Loathed by many, adored by few, Charles Haughey remains a contentious figure in UCD’s history. His name remains engraved on the Commerce & Economics Society (C&E) board as auditor of their 1945-6 session even at the best efforts down through the years of students to scrape it off.

18 10

Features News

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Travel Travelling the world on a shoestring

What are the prospects for students seeking work or an affordable holiday abroad this summer in the middle of a recession? Student Vicky Taylor looks at the options and hears from other students what their plans are. One of the great privileges of being an Irish student is having up to four months free during the summer to do as you choose. Usually the time is spent in far flung destinations like the US, Canada, Asia, South America or Inter-railing around Europe. However, in the current economic climate will there be a change in student holiday plans for this coming summer? With the lack of jobs both here and abroad can students afford to spend their summers away in exotic locations? The numbers of students obtaining J1 working visas for the United States has seen no change according to student travel companies USIT which has offices in all main university cities and SAYIT which is based in Cork. However what both companies have reported is a definite shift in attitude toward the three-month J1 experience itself. “Students are gravitating towards areas where they are more likely to find jobs as opposed to the areas that are traditionally more “fun” to go to.” says USIT spokeswoman Seona Mac Reamoinn.

“The sunny west coast destinations of San Francisco and San Diego have seen a decrease in popularity this year and are being replaced by popular destinations where Americans take holidays themselves. Barack Obama’s call for Americans to invest more money back into their economy means that the majority of Americans will be holidaying at home this year. This works out well for J1 students since more jobs are likely to open up within holiday resorts in the United States and that’s where the J1 students will find jobs” she adds. “American employers have been actively seeking Irish students for these particular jobs with many employment opportunities available. Employers continue to recruit Irish students due to their friendly and extrovert personalities.” The USIT website lists employers who are looking for Irish students this summer. “Many of my friends are going on J1 holidays to the states this summer” says first year law student Fiona Sheil who is studying in University College Galway. “Most of my friends are heading to Chicago as they are more likely to find

What do you want?

jobs there than on the west coast of America. They are aware of the risks of not getting a job however they are still going. I cannot afford to take this risk and am going to stay in Ireland this summer.” She adds “but I know I will regret this decision if they are successful in finding employment” There is no doubt that some students have lost enthusiasm for journeying to the United States this year. The importance of keeping a part-time job at home when employment is increasing is making many students stay in Ireland for most of the summer according to Conor Fingleton student union welfare officer in UCD. “For students lucky enough to have part time jobs, interrailing across Europe will no doubt be the most popular holiday option. The short term option of inter-railing allows students to experience an adventure holiday that will allow them to hold on to their part time jobs in Ireland. Many students feel that to take three months away from jobs that they have in Ireland is an unwise decision.” he says. Third year NCAD art stu-

Flights to the USA Excluding taxes and charges

dent Hannah Legget has also decided against the J1 option and is instead journeying to Asia for the second time.“ I was thinking of going on the J1 holiday at first but I did not feel it was worth paying so much money for the working visa when there was no guarantee of finding a job. Instead I found flights to Thailand that were significantly cheaper than last year and as the cost of living is so cheap over there at least I know my money can go much further.” The most significant attitude change is among those students who are due to graduate this summer. Instead of taking advantage of what will perhaps be their last summer of freedom, they are taking internships in companies, where possible, and are dedicating their time to finding employment. Andrea Finnegan a final year student has been on working holidays in both the US and Canada while studying Sociology at Trinity College Dublin. “I cannot afford the time to take three months away this summer when I am unsure of what I will be doing next year. I would rather spend the summer working a part-time job here.

If a permanent job position does not become available I will use my summer to save up and go travelling for a whole year and try wait out the recession abroad. If I do go away it will only be for a short holiday in Europe” Although the employment outlook is bleak for the summer, most current students remain positive in their attitude. Most are unwilling to give up their chance to experience a summer away from home. Although destinations and attitudes may have to change to fit the current economic climate, students will still be taking full advantage of the coming summer. Economic pessimism among Irish people generally has made many students more determined to leave Ireland. Students would rather take the risk to find employment in a place where both the weather and attitudes toward the current economic climate are more positive. There is no doubt that this summer’s batch of students heading off will be the test to see if there is still a place for student working holidays abroad in the current recession.

Drop into us at Bank of Ireland Montrose Student Store (opposite the UCD flyover) or call 01 2611320

Terms and conditions apply to the USA and Canada flight offer (excluding taxes and charges). To qualify for the USA and Canadian flight voucher applicants must have opened or upgraded their 3rd level student account between the 4th of August 2008 and the 30th of November 2008. Applicants must also use their 3rd level account 10 times each month (including one online top up per month) between 1st November 2008 and 31st January 2009. Applicants must be in first year college. This offer is available until stocks last (5,000 flights available). Bank of Ireland does not accept responsibility for availability or services provided by promoter WIN WIN Ltd. Terms and conditions apply to all 3rd level student current accounts. Applicants must be over 18 years of age. Bank of Ireland is regulated by the Financial Regulator.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Features

How to Negotiate a Lonely Planet Advice for Students The best way to go about the J1 holiday to the States is to book it as a package through a recognised student travel company. Travel companies get good deals for student travel but most importantly offer exam insurance to fly home if you fail exams. If a student can’t find employment and can’t afford to stay in the states, travel companies have links with airlines and can find deals on flights back to Ireland. Travel company websites advertise job postings from American employers which are specifically available to their customers. For students who are going away for the first time travel companies offer good advice and it is a good contact to have if any problems occur while abroad. Popular travel companies are USIT www.usit.ie, SAYIT www.sayit. ie, Go for Less www.goforless. ie, Travel Club www.clubtravel.ie, Trail finders, www.trailfinders.ie

If travelling through the US and Canada Craig’s list www.craigslist. com is a useful site for both accommodation and job advertisements. In recent years the west coast cities of the United States such as San Diego has seen an influx of huge numbers of Irish students. As a result the job market there is very competitive and employers are reluctant to employ Irish in part-time jobs as they all leave at the end of the summer. As San Diego is an all-year tourist destination this means there is no great increase in jobs available during the summer. The advice that travel companies are giving is to head towards destinations where Americans will be vacationing this year which is usually to coastal or lake resorts. Job postings for these resorts can be found on most travel companies’ official websites.

Photographs by Philip Connolly

If planning on travelling throughout North America, Southwest Airlines is a useful airline for cheap domestic flights. www.southwest. com. Greyhound is a bus service that runs across North America which provides cheap transport. www.greyhound.com

There are many Irish companies that are offering student travel packages to countries all over the world so shop around to find a package that suits you and the type of holiday you want to experience. If the country you are going to requires a visa just remember that travel companies charge commission and if bought independently are significantly cheaper.

For inter-railing tickets through Europe www.interrrailnet.com is the official website. Spend time on searching for hostels before you go in order to get the best deals and if possible try to pre-book accommodation. Both Ryanair www.ryanair.com and Aer Lingus www.aerlingus.com offer cheap flights to many destinations throughout Eastern and W estern Europe.

Touring Ireland is a good option for those students who are watching the cash or trying to hold down their part-time jobs at home. If you are looking for information on trips around Ireland www.discoverireland.ie is an ideal website. For adventure holidays in Ireland Delphi adventure holidays offers many interesting activities. delphimountainresort.com. For surfing holidays look at the Irish surfing associations official website.www.isasurf.ie

If you are going on an exotic holiday take a look at the tropical medical bureau website for helpful information on vaccinations. www.tmb.ie

Getting a job before you arrive at the chosen destination is a good option for a working summer away this year. If looking for a job specifically in Europe www.fas.ie contains advertisements for jobs within Europe for the summer. Another good site for both jobs and accommodation in Europe is www.eurodesk.ie.

VOLUME XXII ISSUE VIII

ALL THE NEWS THAT’S FIT TO SATIRISE ONLY 47P!

POPE GOES BUDDHIST AFTER EXPOSING THE CHURCH IN THE EASTER ADDRESS. ‘IT’S ALL A LOAD OF CRAP ANYWAY’ This week

TIGER WOODS PLAYS WITH OWN BALLS, NIKE SAYS. CONDOM TRUCK CRASHES AND SPILLS LOAD SCOUTS PITCH TENTS AT SEMINARY

Protests in Thailand spark fears of sexual frustration As Thailand is thrown into turmoil with widespread disruption caused by antigovernment riots, there are fears for the future of the international sex industry. Some estimates claim thousands of prostitutes, rent boys, and lady boys may soon be out of business as the sex tourism industry suffers. Many middle aged, overweight business men now fear for their safety and as a result are no longer travelling to Thailand in ––search of their sexual delights and satisfaction. This has of course had a knock on effect on the Irish economy as many business men are now in a state of

extreme sexual frustration. As a result they are finding it harder and harder, to make logical decisions and thus keep our deflated economy on the rise. The Irish prostitute industry on the other hand has reported a significant rise in their business. Many have attracted new customers by giving special deals, such as two for one and half price hand shandies with a smile and a happy ending. Government T.D.’s who recently voted to change the emblem of Fianna Fail to a condom, as it causes inflation, protects pricks, and give you a false sense of security while you’re being

screwed, have expressed extreme concern that the decline of the Thai sex industry may have a knock on effect at home. They worry that the increasing number of sexually unsatisfied men on the streets of Ireland may lead to an increase in violent sex crimes. One minister stated that ‘men in Ireland had an outlet for their sexual urges in the Thai sex industry, now however they may resort to violence in order to reach the same levels of satisfaction’. Many offices around the country have noted a decline in production on the part of their male employees as they appear to be suffering from stiffness in the

right arm. Doctors have also warned that unless the situation in Thailand can be fixed soon, and the sex industry restored to former operating capacity, there could be a dramatic increase in cases of arthritis of the wrist joints in wealthy successful males. It seems so that it is in the best interest of the western world to assist in finding a solution to the troubles in Thailand. If we fail to do so we may be left without any relief, while our economy continues to suffer in a sexual recession.

ing them up, may in fact be a member of the gay cruising community. The revelation it seems have caused all manner of suspicions among male toilet users.One young man from Leitrim, who would rather not be named, said he was ‘horrified’ when he realised that men he has chatted with in the library toilet may have been gay cruisers. Barry (23) says he believes designated cruising areas ought to be set up around the university campus to cater for people with such taste and therefore make the

toilets a far safer and more comfortable place for all. It is of course an interesting paradox of our society that men and women must use separate toilets and changing rooms, while gay and straight people of the same sex use the same facilities together. Maybe the fairest thing to do would be to simply have one unisex toilet for all, then we can all feel uncomfortable together. This of course would also serve to increase the community spirit on the campus. In the meantime here are a few

points of toilet behaviour

JANE FONDA TO TEENS: USE HEAD TO AVOID PREGNANCY ONE ARMED MAN AP PLAUDS THE KINDNESS OF STRANGERS CLINTONS FIRMNESS GOT RESULTS

New Toilet Regulations in UCD It has been suggested by several students that the toilet system in UCD is in dire need of reform. Students feel passionately that the old gender separated toilet system is in need of being updated in light of recent revelations of Gay cruising in UCD. A number of heterosexual male students have made it known that they feel uncomfortable with the knowledge that the guy standing next to them at the urinal, staring intently at their manhood siz-

1. When entering the toilet go to the urinal furthest from the other person there. 2. When using the urinal keep your eyes fixed firmly ahead never look to the side. 3. Although you may be tempted to size yourself up against the lad next to you, this is not acceptable behaviour and must be avoided at all costs! 4. It is also unacceptable to shake off the drops for the guy next to you or indeed anyone but yourself!

YOU

WERE

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Regulars Random Review : B- Movies Once I watched a film of low budget, low special effects, peerless tension, story to make a great novel and acting to sweep the Oscars. It rejuvenated my love with the celluloid medium and a belief that money isn’t needed to make a work of art. Horrors and thrillers more entertaining than any of the massively funded blockbusters of recent times, more character and plot than is seen in Whitbread winner and more integrity than Colin Farrell, I give you the B-Movie. Mainly centred around the zombie-thriller-horrorslasher-phenomenon these greats spawned the phrase cult following and showed with passion a great film can be created on a shoe-string budget. Never has as much dedication been given to editing and subtle directing

as the many B-movies. Dawn of the Dead, for instance, is actually about the growing c o m m e rcialisation of American culture than a zombie ap o c a lyp s e in a shopping mall (see the 2004 remake with Ving Rhames). The alternative messages are all over these films, even in the modern day with the greatest example being 28 days later which can be seen as the greatest human fear, not the zombies but the loneliness and the unknown, Evil Dead is about the red men-

ace during cold war America. These are visions that writers and directors want to do and are not merely paid to do. However, studios in the movie industry are not so stupid to see a money spinner when they see one. Bmovies are making a lot of money, lets purposefully

bankroll B-movies is the general logic. Now the precipice of extinction lies open as true artists can’t see past the stagnating piles of studio waste. Where do we leave it? Are we to forget the brave tales of Ashley Williams or George Romero’s Dead trilogy with such ease? Will no one fill the void and save movies from themselves? B-movies are what got me to love films as well as great directors like Peter Jackson and Quentin Tarintino. They are the life blood of the industry, making sure that young and impressionable people make the movies they want to, not what

the studios provide. They are where writers cut their teeth on their ability to create tension and producers are able to keep their budget with out sacrificing quality. The B-movie may in someway be a dated phenomenon, a flicker of what could be possible with budget under $1 million and desire to tell a story, and perhaps that is a good thing. But it is what we lose from them is creativity and talent, those subtle messages that communicate to us that passion is the true quality of a film and not its awards.

A farewell to University College Dublin? Oh how we’ll miss thee. Oh how you will miss those days when you could role out of bed up in Belgrove or Merville at midday, try to figure out the name of the person sprawled naked in bed beside you, eat breakfast consisting of alcoselzer and aspirin, pop a few morning after pills just in case , and make your way to your 2pm lecture in the Newman building only to get distracted by the bar along the way. From now on the only reason you’ll have for getting out of bed is to collect your dole money. Oh dear I hope you didn’t actually think that your years of college would lead to a fulfilling career? The best you can hope for in today’s economic climate is to become the finest educated

member of staff in the local kebab shop. And I’m sure that degree in English literature will come in oh so handy as you mop up the vomit from the bathroom floor after a particularly festive Saturday night. It will seem all the more bitter when you consider that just a year ago you were that guy/gal stumbling around Dame street throwing up into your own shoe, and then hurling it towards the nearest taxi in vain hope of obtaining a lift home. The kebab shop won’t be all that bad of course. You’ll never have to sit another exam again in your life. You’ll never have to spend hours sitting in the library studying frantically, trying desperately to think up a witty comment to scribble on the back of the toilet door.

It truly is a brave new world out there beyond the student bubble. Responsibility is now ahead of you. No longer will it be acceptable to spend the majority of your time off your face drooling uncontrollably while standing at a bar urinating on yourself. Interior decoration will no longer consist of the road signs you stole on the way home from Coppers and two month old puke stains. No indeed now you’ll have bills to pay, and you won’t even have that student card to get those nifty discounts in Schuh. We here at the turbine strongly advise you apply for a master and hang around, for the freedom, the frolics, the casual sex, the drugs, the drink, and the people. Lets face it folks, you may have thought this place was

a shit hole, but the world out there is a hell of a lot worse.

News Regulars

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Sport

Rugby UCD go down to St. Marys

Superleague On the road to the world cup

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Page 25

Down the line

In the middle of an economic downtown, can sport lift us above the depression? Colman Hanley At present, we live in a country enveloped in a general mood of doom and gloom. The talk of recession for the past eight months has been on the front pages of newspapers, on the airwaves and is scoured across the Internet. Last week’s Budget only added to people’s further misery. Is there anything out there that we can put a positive spin on or just simply be happy about? Luckily in these times, we can forget all our troubles and worries by investing our time and attention in sport. Sport is the one of the few facets of life in times of recession that is capable of prospering. The evidence of this was clear when one saw the remarkable crowds that followed the Irish rugby team to Italy, Scotland and Wales. Let’s not also forget that over five thousand people descended on Bari at the beginning of this month. People went through all the hassle of getting connecting flights or trains just to see Robbie Keane rescue our nation’s World Cup chances by scoring a late equaliser. In a few months, that goal could prove to be so crucial. Recessionary times have been proven to unearth sporting talent, and our nation should know this more than any other. Ireland’s most recent recession was in 1983. As the 1980s moved on, it was the great achievements by our sporting stars that raised people’s spirits. Barry McGuigan winning the WBA World Featherweight Boxing Championship in 1985, Stephen Roche winning the remarkable treble of the Giro d’Italia, the Tour de France and the World Championship in 1987,

and Ireland’s first participation at a major tournament in Euro 88 (including a famous 1-0 win over England) were just some of the sporting feats that brought joy to many. However the landmark event was Italia 90 and Ireland’s World Cup journey. The three weeks that Ireland lasted in the competition caught the imagination of a nation, as people religiously watched each game that Jack Charlton’s side were involved in. To this day, Dave O’Leary’s winner in the penalty shoot-out against Romania is a moment repeatedly shown by our national broadcaster, while many still discuss amongst themselves ‘Where were you when Dave O’Leary scored?.’ O’Leary’s goal has been heralded as a crucial moment in our nation’s history. The moment represented much more than just a great Irish sporting moment. The self-esteem of the nation improved. Suddenly the young people of Ireland had sporting heroes to aspire to, who were competing on a global level. These were the people who would be the key to Ireland’s future success, and had the fire in their bellies to go and create the ‘Celtic Tiger’. Some leading economists quietly admit that the success of Italia 90 had some form of responsibility for the birth of the economic boom. Back to the present, and following the dramatic collapse of Eddie O’Sullivan’s tenure, a team rose from the ashes under Declan Kidney to claim our second ever Grand Slam. Perhaps our rugby stars can create a similar turnaround of our economic fortunes. The Grand

Slam winning team was littered with players that grew up during the previous recession, Paul O’Connell, Ronan O’Gara, and UCD’s Brian O’Driscoll and Gordon D’Arcy, to name just a few. Last Sunday, our nation’s Grand Slam heroes delivered further sporting success with its rugby sides by progressing to the semi-finals of the Heineken Cup. Even Geordan Murphy, who plies his trade with Leicester Tigers, is in the semi-finals, while one must have sympathy for the unfortunate Tommy Bowe, a member of the battered Ospreys side. Both Munster and Leinster displayed such commitment and talent in their respective wins. On top of this, we are now set to be treated to the prospect of a Munster-Leinster semi-final in Croke Park. The game will be worth millions to Dublin, as many from the south will descend on the capital, while hotels and B&Bs are likely to be full to the brim. Indeed there’s no doubt about it, we should be truly grateful to the golden era of Irish rugby. The timing of this purple patch is perfect. Our leading golfers also gave us all something to be proud of again last weekend. While some may be used to seeing Pádraig Harrington win major titles nowadays, we must not forget that the competition is tough. Making the cut and seeing out the weekend is an achievement in itself. Harrington had a mixed weekend but still managed to finish under par, and tied in 35th place. Graeme McDowell finished joint 17th and ended as the highest placed Irishman, a result that will please the Portrush man. Wheth-

er he’s finishing high up the order, or possibly breaking rules for kicking sand in the bunker, it is the youngster from Hollywood, Co. Down, that everyone is talking about. Rory McIlroy is just one young Irish sports star that seems to be on the rise during the economic rut we currently find ourselves in. His finish of joint 20th at the US Masters at the weekend was a remarkable achievement for someone who is still a teenager. His potential is quite simply frightening. When legends of the golfing game, such as Gary Player and Mark O’Meara, claim that he can be greater than Tiger Woods, we all have something to look forward to. Closer to home, Portumna and Galway hurler Joe Canning is without doubt another young sports star on the verge of greatness. Canning already has 3 All-Ireland Senior Club medals, 2 Connacht Senior Club medals, 2 AllIreland Minor Hurling Championship and an All-Ireland Under-21 medal. Not a bad haul for a 20 year old. But it is his performances that have been truly impressive. With a bit of luck, it could be Canning and McIlroy that are the Irish sporting stars of the summer. However, it is still difficult for sport to prosper in a recession. The budget cuts made by the government are likely to see some sporting funds cut. The Irish Sports Council recently saw their budget slashed by €1 million, which resulted in the Athletic High Performance programme receiving no funding whatsoever. How many other sports will be hit is unknown, but it is likely we will hear similar stories like

this. The League of Ireland has seen clubs struggle financially in the past few years, and the recession is unlikely to help create greater income or investment. People across the country have an indifferent attitude to the League, despite the improvement of grounds across the country and the increase in media exposure in the past few years. Matches in Richmond Park, Turner’s Cross, or the Belfield Bowl regularly display a decent standard of football. Performances in Europe, such as Drogheda’s against Dinamo Kiev or Saint Patrick’s Athletic versus Hertha Berlin last year, show the standard of Irish football has increased and is still improving. Like it was in 1990, it is most likely to be our national soccer side that can really get the nation motivated. The World Cup is the biggest sporting event in the world, so the prestige of playing in such an event would mean a great deal to the nation. The fact that Ireland would have a decent chance of achieving something would also create a massive buzz. By October or November this year, Trapattoni’s side will know what their plans are for the summer of 2010. Their choice is either holidaying in some resort in the Mediterranean or hitting it up in Johannesburg next summer. For our own personal sanity, and for Ireland’s economic well-being, we should all hope it’s the latter.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

24 NewsSport

College clinch vital losing bonus point ahead of relegation battle Photographs by Barry Hennessy UCD St. Marys College

17 24

Templeville Road

Bryan Devlin

First half tries from Mark Sexton, Shaun McCarthy and ex-Connaught back Conor McPhillips saw the home side secure a 17-5 lead over College at the break. However, while the home side were dominant for the majority of the first half it

was UCD who proved quicker out of the blocks with the opening try on the quarter of the hour mark. Throughout the opening quarter the College found themselves entrenched in the home side’s half, and while the ensuing try may be accredited to the College No. 15, Noel Reid, it was

ultimately the hard graft of the front eight which created the space out wide for the full back to skip over for a try in the corner. The conversion, however, was unsuccessful. The visitors could have doubled their lead moments later with some impressively incisive running from Russian wing Vasily Artemiev. However, he was tackled ten metre short by a scrambling Mary’s defence. The lack of support ensured a quick turnover for the Templeville side. The turnover would signal a halt to College’s attacking play for the remainder of the half. While well-worked back moves from the UCD looked impressive from the stands, breaks in the Mary’s line were few and far between and any excursions into the opposition’s red zone proved short lived. With the game all but sewn up at the interval all that remained for Mary’s to do was put in a solid second half

performance. However, late scores from UCD ensured that this game, initially tipped as a mismatch, would go right to the death. Once again it was the College pack which proved a thorn in the Mary’s side, with tries from front row pairing of John Anthony Lee and Conor Geoghegan helping themselves to a brace. Ian McInley added the conversion to Lee’s try which ultimately secured College’s losing bonus point. However, with Mary’s reduced to 13 men for the final moments College were extremely unlucky not to see their last few moves reflected on the scoreboard. A converted second half try from Conor McPhillips as well as a few missed kicks from McKinley and Reid proved the difference between these two sides. This one could certainly have gone the other way but the home side were willing to lose discipline to secure the bonus point; both Hugh Hogan and David Kilbride were in the sin bin come final whistle. St.Mary’s stay in contention for the title and face Terenure in the last round of fixtures

The Green and Blue Giant is no mean feat. With regards to the all Irish semi-final O’Kelly concedes that while Munster will be a factor, Leinster will approach it with same level of commitment as any other game. “When you’re playing Munster, games can be incredibly different. But that’s more down to who they are and who we are. There is such an unbelievable rivalry there. Then again, it’s not just the rivalry it’s

“It’s not just the rivalry it’s the whole media circus which builds up around these games”

Following Leinster’s narrowest of victories over Harlequins, Bryan Devlin speaks with Leinster and Ireland rugby legend, Malcolm O’Kelly about the upcoming semi-final Even after a two day rest up following a battering game, O’Kelly, two inches taller than Paul O’Connell at a towering 6’8’’, seems weary. At nearly thirty-five with over ninety international caps under his belt one can hardly blame him. “After the game on Sunday I was absolutely knackered, worn out but I was delighted with the job done. It was something that we really, really wanted to achieve. Having looked back over the game the performance showed as much. Without playing particularly good rugb mance and maybe not taking our chances we dug in and got what we ultimately wanted out of

the game.” One of the standout features of the game, for Leinster fans, will be their side’s tenacious defence, particularly in their own twenty-two. O’Kelly is, however, keen to play this down as standard procedure for the province. “We’ve been pretty mean in terms of our defence all season, so in this game we really needed to call on it because ‘Quins are a very attacking side, they are very good in terms of continuity. So in that regard alone, our defence was fully tested. And I think we held up quite well for the most part.” Indeed to only concede one try with less than 30% possession

the whole media circus which builds up around these games. But at the same time we will approach it in the same manner as we would any game and try and not get too carried away with it. The main thing is to be composed when you first step out onto that pitch.” “To be honest, I wasn’t hugely aware of the drop goal threat. I was in the two previous rucks and couldn’t really see a huge amount. But having looked at the game again with the extra advantage of hearing the commentators and seeing the clock, had I been in the stands I would have been incredibly nervous. At the time I was very involved in the game and was just playing it phase by phase. I was obviously delighted to see it not go over.” O’Kelly has seen it all before but still relishes a closely fought victory. He made his international debut for Ireland twelve years ago against the All Blacks. Since then he has become somewhat of a folk hero in the green and blue shirt. However, there was a time when he was nervous debutant and he recalls happily the

step up from provincial duty to the main stage. “There is a huge step up in terms of intensity when you move from provincial to international. But that’s obvious and you expect that. Oddly though, there isn’t a huge jump in terms intensity between Heineken Cup level and international, there is only a small difference. However, the gap between club level and provincial is huge. You’re in a situation where you’re going from semi professional or amateur to fully professional. If a player can make it to provincial level there is no reason why they can’t go the whole way.” “A lot of the senior players were quite helpful. Keith Wood, obviously, who would have been involved at the time, would have been a mentor. He was one of the more senior players, a very vocal player and a great leader. Mick Galway was too, but for the most part Woody was the man. He was the most settled player in the squad, whereas most of the other players were fighting for their lives, just like myself.” The 1994/95 season saw him capped by Ireland at Under-21 and Student level while he also debuted for the Leinster senior side against Northern Transvaal. His performance in his Ireland debut against New Zealand in 1997 was his springboard into the side and he was then chosen for 12 consecutive internationals. The Dubliner is a renowned lineout jumper and offers speed over short distances and of course a powerful presence in the loose. Upon arrival in Templeogue College, the intrepid visitor, first year and parent alike will be greeted with images of famous past pupils and Senior Cup campaigns. Grinning pictures of one television’s premiere celebrity gardeners, Diarmuid Gavin, ex-Connaught player Conor McPhillips and inventor of Podge and Rodge decorate

the halls of the South Dublin school. Malcolm O’Kelly is the Golden boy however, and holds pride of place in the heart of his old school. Just beyond

“A lot of the senior players were quite helpful. Keith Wood, obviously, who would have been involved at the time, would have been a mentor. the main entrance there exists what the students refer to as the Malcolm O’Kelly shrine. Locked in a glass case is one of the Ireland lock’s early international jerseys surrounded by snaps of the green giant in action. There was a theory among students a few years ago that every one in ten Templeogue College students had an item of O’Kelly’s clothing in their possession, thanks largely to the sheer volume of raffles held by the administration to raise some funds for the rugby team and musicals. While in the twilight of his career at this stage O’Kelly will certainly, in a few season’s time, enter into a new stage of his career. As Irelands second highest capped player He will join the likes of Ciarán Fitzgerald and Keith Wood as the newest addition to the Irish Forwards Hall of Fame. Once you get to that stage, you’ll never have to buy another drink for the rest of your life.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Sport

Ireland set to go cricket crazy all over again With the Ireland Cricket team on the verge of World Cup qualification, Colman Hanley talks to captain William Porterfield, team manager Roy Torrens and coach Phil Simmons Cricket has once again made a forceful foray back into the publicity ring, a circuit dominated by soccer and rugby more often than not. Ireland’s cricket team, playing in South Africa in the pre-qualifying tournament for the 2011 World Cup, are set to clinch a top four finish that will secure World Cup qualification. Cricket is clearly still on a wave of success from the 2007 World Cup. Brought to Ireland in the 1800’s by the British, cricket was first tried out in Ballinasloe, Co. Galway, and in Kilkenny. But the sport was seen as symbolic of the aristocracy and it effectively wilted away once the GAA was founded in 1884. However, cricket’s strongholds have always remained. Club and international games have always taken place in the island’s two main national venues at Phoenix Park and Stormont. The 2007 World Cup

proved to be a catalyst for Irish cricket, creating the biggest ever interest in the sport and attracting record numbers of people into taking part in the game. Many felt Ireland entered the 2007 World Cup just to make up the numbers, but that notion was soon dismissed. Ireland started out with a dramatic last ball draw against Zimbabwe and then beat one of the world’s leading cricket nations in Pakistan. That meant Ireland progressed to the ‘Super 8’ phase, and though they failed to progress to the semi-finals, a convincing victory over Bangladesh in their final game meant the team and former coach Aidy Birrell went out on a high. These winning performances suddenly showed the cricketing world that Ireland was a force to be reckoned with. Speaking before this current qualifying tournament, Irish captain William Porterfield spoke of

the popularity of Irish cricket. “I think cricket in Ireland has been developing really well. Even since the World Cup in 2007 I think we have taken some massive steps. I think we’ve got to continue to take those strides and so qualification for all the major tournaments is a must for ourselves. We’ve never won a tournament outside of Ireland, and we want to rectify that. It’s a really exciting time to be involved in Irish cricket.” With qualifying being so important, breathalyser tests have been introduced to the squad before every game to make sure a ban on alcohol is being followed. Speaking from South Africa, Ireland team manager Roy Torrens backed the idea. “We’ve made it clear it would be a disciplinary offence – if any player breaches the rule they will be fined or forced to miss a match. To be fair to the lads though, it shows

they want to do well and won’t tolerate rules being broken or anyone letting the team down.” Such professionalism from a team of mainly amateurs has also been shown in their results as Ireland finished Group A with a 100% record. But in their first ‘Super 8’ phase game, Ireland suffered a surprise defeat to Afghanistan. Coach Phil Simmons blamed the defeat on ‘complacency’, while Torrens added, “The defeat was very disappointing and the lads were down after it. But we know where we went wrong and we can fix those problems.” Torrens’s assessment was proven to be correct as Ireland recovered to defeat the United Arab Emirates last Monday by 8 wickets. Eoin Morgan, who has recently been called up to the initial England Twenty 20 squad, scored

UCD Sentinels Trinity Thunderbolts

34 14

Dublin University Santry

First Blood in Colours to Sentinels

Photographs by Barry Hennessy

Belfield’s own American Football Club, the Sentinels, travelled to Santry on Saturday to take on their age old rivals Trinity College Dublin in the IAFL’s first ever “Colours” match. UCD, undefeated in their first four games in the DV8s now, made a ground breaking win over the Trinity side, now in their second year. College started the scoring and with their 3rd play. QB Wright launched the ball to his favourite wide receiver Jason Kirker on a 60 yard for a touch down, Kirker with his 4th TD this season. Wright ran the ball in for the extra point making it 7-0. Trinity fired on all cylinders on their first drive and pounded the ball at the UCD defense and also scored on their 3rd play with running back James Marron running the ball into the end zone for 45 yards. No XP and the score was 7-6. The game took a faster pace as Wright connected with Oisin McArdle for a 50 yard pass and Kirker for a 20 yard pass on the next drive but failed to punch it in as the Trinity Defense held strong. College changed their Backs as their power running game wasn’t working against a stubborn Trinity defense. Vitale Levdonski who normally plays at LB stepped in as running back and on his first drive gained 35 yards on the ground and College’s next TD. Wright passed to on fire McArdle for the XP making the game 14-6. Levdonski remained in the backfield for college and before halftime col-

the winning run in another innings where he impressed with the bat. The mentality in the Irish set-up is clearly full of self-belief and a desire to win, in order to prove that the last World Cup was no fluke. “I’m confident that if we play to our ability, we can beat any side in this competition,” said Torrens. “We may have lost to the UAE but we can put that right by gaining qualification for the World Cup and more importantly, winning the tournament. The lads are determined to do that.” Ireland will play their final game of the qualifying tournament on Sunday 19th of April. Whether that is a final or just a third versus fourth place play-off remains to be seen. It may just be a wise move to read up on the rules of cricket if they are an alien

lege drove down field. Wright having a monster day with a pass thrown to Levdonski in the flats, Levdonski ran for 40 yards before getting bounced out of bounds. Wright found Kirker again open in the Endzone for a 20 yd pass for TD, Levdonski capping this drive with the XP making it 21-6. With not a lot of time left on the clock Trinity drove the ball downfield, Marron again being the danger man. Overall, however, Marron enjoyed success with 40 yards on this drive and getting himself into the endzone for a TD and XP. The score tottered at 21-13 going into half time. Trinity never really took higher ground offensively but their defense made the visitor’s offense work for space. In the fourth quarter College dominated and two scores in quick succession finished this game off. After being picked off by Murphy, Trinity gave the ball back to College and Aman Sikand ran it in from 5 yards Wright with the XP 28-13 Trinity’s offense again couldn’t move the ball and bravely going for it on fourth down in their own red zone the ball was overturned. College, with a change at Quarterback, scored with their very first play. Karl Cremin strided in at QB with his first pass to Oisin McArdle for a 25 yard touchdown to close out the game.

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

26 NewsSport

UCD Rugby’s rising talent Jordan Daly speaks to members of the Ireland U20 2009 six nations campaign who are set to compete for places in the IRB 2009 Junior World Cup in Japan this Summer

Jordan Daly

Mark Flanagan Age: 19 Ireland U20s, second row Caps:4 Points:0 Height:2.01m Weight: 107kg “I played under twenties rugby last year. I was spotted by John McClean (UCD head of Rugby) at Irish Youths. We played them in a challenge match and that’s how I got on from the U20s team.” “I had a good season last year and had been working hard over the summer with provincial squads and the hard work payed off. I got my chance at the start of the season. I was subbed

on against Trinity in the colours match. When I do get an opportunity I take it with both hands. “The U20s six nations panel was good success, and we came second overall. We feel we could have gone the whole way and won the grand slam, just one unfortunate result didn’t go our way.” “My best moment so far was my Ireland U20s debut cap against France in Dubarry Park. I’m from Mullingar and Dubarry Park is ten minutes from me. There was a big turn out overall. There is also talks of an academy contract in the works, it’s all dependent on this U20s regime, if this goes well they will be looking for me to come into the academy and there will be more hard work ahead.”

Ian McKinley Age: 19 Irish U20 Outhalf/Centre caps: 5 Points: 23 Height: 182cm Weight: 90kg “I played my first match for the UCD first team in October in the AIB Cup.” The first year sports management diploma student has made an immediate impact in his first year in Belfield and been a regular starter for the past six months. “My proudest moment was playing for the Irish u20s.”

Name:David McMillan Position: Striker Age: 20

The future of UCD Soccer Colman Hanley

David McMillan has achieved a lot in his two years in UCD. A regular in the A Championship side last year, his year culminated with a goal in the 2-1 victory over Bohemians in the final last November. McMillan was also a member of the victorious squad in the Collingwood Cup in Cork last February. “The highlight of last year was my goal against Bohemians in the final. After being knocked out of the Collingwood in the first round in 2008, we were really determined to win it this year and to do so was really great”. McMillan may be a League of Ireland footballer, but he must combine football with his second year course in Architecture. “Compared to most of the lads, I’ve a pretty hectic timetable of 9am to 6pm most days. After that you sometimes have to head off training so it can be quite tough and hectic. But at the same time, it’s a good release as playing a bit of ball can get your head off college work for a while”. McMillan broke through into the UCD senior side this year and has been a revelation. He has already notched 3 goals in a side which currently stand top of the League of Ireland First Division with 6 wins from

McKinley was part of the impressive U20s Six Nations campaign and kicked well throughout. Despite only turning nineteen in December he will be looked upon to help UCD stay up with his kicking expertise. A position in Leinster is the driving factor for his rigorous training regime. “Hopefully I will have another year in the Leinster Academy. I will have a ten week pre-season plan which means training up to three times a day for that period. For next season I am working towards a more permanent role in the Leinster A Team.”

6 games. He has also built a good partnership with fellow striker Ciarán Kilduff, the league’s top scorer on 5 goals. On his hopes for the future, he says he has to outscore his brother Evan on the goals front to have bragging rights (he currently leads 3-2), while he hopes to win promotion with UCD. “We have to be careful as we weren’t seen as promotion contenders at the start of the season. There’s still 25 games to go so it’s a case of taking each game as it comes and just keep ploughing away. Personally, I’ve got to keep pushing myself as nearly every player is under 21 so the competition for places is fierce. If I do that, hopefully I’ll stay in the team and we could be playing Premier Division football”.

Name: John Dineen Position: Midfield

Age: 19 19-year-old John Dineen was born in Tralee, County Kerry. In his teenage years, Dineen made the decision of choosing soccer over GAA. Soon afterwards, Dineen moved to Dublin and played schoolboy football with Belvedere. The teenager soon moved to Cork City FC and played with them for a year. However after applying for a scholar-

Mullins On Sport Head of Sport, Brian Mullins expressed his delight at the vast spectrum of UCD achievements over the past year. UCD’s past and present students of Brian O’Driscoll, Jamie Heaslip, Gordon D’Arcy and Robert Kearney all played in Ireland’s Grandslam succes. “Sometimes the acknowledgement of the college’s contribution doesn’t come until people leave the college. For example, someone like Robert Kearney is really a graduate of the college now rather than a student. To have achieved such great success this year is fantastic”. “We try to do our best to make sure that undergraduate and postgraduate students get the best opportunities to play sport with the college”. Work on the Student Learning Leisure and Sports Facility (SLLS), which has already received planning permission, is set to commence this month. The project, which is to include a swimming pool and fitness centre, is due to be completed in 2011 Projects like this will only serve to aid the development of Ireland’s future stars, some of whom the College Tribune have focused

ship in UCD, he returned to Dublin. “I could’ve stayed with Cork after my Leaving Cert, but I decided to continue my education and fortunately it’s worked out for me. In going to UCD, I knew I would get a chance of playing senior football with UCD, and ultimately becoming a footballer as that’s what I want to be. The competition for places here is hard, hopefully I might be involved for the rest of the season”. The Tralee born teenager was at the centre of the Collingwood Cup team. It’s not uncommon for Kerrymen to leave Cork victorious and it proved no different for midfielder Dineen who claimed the prize of ‘Player of the Tournament’. “UCD has been a good place to come to and to play sport. It’s a nice place, there’s a good atmosphere around here, and footballing wise, it’s a good club to be at”. Dineen manages to combine his diploma studies in sports management while concentrating on football. He has recently made his breakthrough into the first team after missing the first four games of the season due to injury. “Personally, I want to break into the starting eleven. As a team, we want to win promotion to the Premier Division. We had a team meeting at the start of the year and the team all felt we were good enough to achieve the objective of promotion.”

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

Sport

Up and Coming in G.A.A Eoghan Glynn

Barry O’Rourke Age: 20 Club: Kilmacud Crokes Studying: 2nd Year Arts – Irish and History

Young Guns of UCD Marion Jordan Daly

Daniel James Age18 Position: guard “I suppose I had a slow start to the season in general, but as the games progressed I got more court time and I got more into it and made more of an impact as the season went on. “To be honest my best moment was getting final quarter play in the semi final play off first leg against UCC Demons last month. It gave me bragging rights over the older lads. That was my best game and definitely my favourite moment of the year. Even with the Superleague experience, the main highlight of the season was winning the U20s national cup final. Winning any national trophy is an achievement and nobody expected us to win it so that was special. It’s been a great first year.” “I’m taking a couple weeks off, going away with some friends and then getting into the gym, put on some muscle and keep playing as much as I can but try and take it easy too. It’s the first summer I have off in a while, because I was away with Irish teams at varoius ages levels the last few summers so I will get time to relax.”

Paddy Young Age: 20 Position : guard

Young captiained the U20s UCD Marian side to the National Cup Final victory. Having been involved with the Superleague team in training of late he will

be another one to watch in UCD Sports Centre as this was his last season at U20 level and he now looks to break into the senior squad as they go for the glory next season.

Following a magnificent underage dual career with Kilmacud Crokes which consisted of several county titles, Barry was part of the All-Ireland Club Championship winning squad last month. He has also represented UCD in both hurling and football, restricting himself to just the Sigerson team this year. However, having had playing roles with both the Leinster minor hurling champions and the recent Leinster u21 football champions, O’Rourke can’t pinpoint which victory he’d consider the highlight of his career - “The football was very nice considering we’d been particularly poor in the years beforehand,” admits O’Rourke, “but the hurling was obviously nice too after beating Kilkenny.” Apart from going all the way with the Dublin u21s, O’Rourke’s main aim for next year is a simple one - “The long term goal would be to get into the Dublin senior football team, but at the moment I’m just focussed on getting

ConorJames Age: 18 Position: forward Conor, twin brother of Daniel, broke into the UCD Marian Superleague team back in late September against Tralee Tigers and has been a regular sub and starter. “The most memorable moment for me in the last year was Daniel’s basket in the last seconds of the National Cup final to win it for us; it was like time stood still when the ball dropped in. “Myself and Daniel had started a few senior games and it was an exciting time for the club coming into the play-offs, not just for us. The club hadn’t gone that far in a couple of years and it was a very exciting time for everybody.” “After a short break I am going to concentrate on getting my fitness back in the summer. I plan to start shooting the ball again in July and as soon as we head into August we will pick up the fitness again, I won’t even touch the ball; just run, run, run.” “We always have a chance of winning the Superleague trophy. We showed this year what the team can do. We didn’t perform down in Cork but in the first leg we showed we are as good as anybody.”

Over The Hurdle Eoghan Glynn

into the Crokes team.” Ross O’Carroll Age: 21 Club: Kilmacud Crokes Studying: 3rd Year Arts – History and Politics Rory also comes from a successful underage Kilmacud team, winning the county minor football title in 2005. O’Carroll has since represented UCD, making both Sigerson and Fitzgibbon squads this year. Ross has also enjoyed intercounty success, winning the Leinster hurling titles at both minor and u21 level, and also being involved with the new Leinster u21 Football Champions.However, following Kilmacud’s All Ireland victory last month, there’s no doubt as to what Ross believes his sporting highlight has been so far – “I don’t think I’ll ever beat that to be honest. It was playing with lads that I’ve been playing with for years. Best sporting day of my life.” As part of the Dublin u21 football squad and the Dublin Senior hurling panel, O’Carroll has a busy few months ahead of him, however, it seems home is where his heart is - “I’d really love another crack at the All-Ireland with

he’s won gold in the Senior National Cross Country last November. However, his greatest sporting moment came in the team events when UCD beat great rivals DCU in road relay championships of 2005 - “The reason it was so good was because it was nine miles of racing, which came down to literally two seconds at the end.” “I might take a year out of my phD next year and train full time for the marathon in the London Olympics.” Ronan Daly Age: 21 Events participated in: 400m, 800m, 1500m.

Following years of competing for Blackrock, Daly has been at UCD since 2005, and was involved with the UCD team that won silver in the Indoor Intervarsities Championships in 2005. He has since become captain of the UCD Athletics Club, a role which After joining the Dundrum South involves “a lot of organising and travDublin Athletic Club, McCormack elling.” won both a junior All-Ireland gold Despite this, Daly considers his greatmedal in the 3000m and then an est achievement to be before comAll-Ireland junior cross-country gold ing to UCD with his Leinster schools medal seven years ago. Since then, cross-country victory in his 2004 for Alan McCormack Age: 24 Events participated in: Crosscountry, 1500m, 3000m, 5000m, 10000m.

Crokes as the great teams are able to defend their titles.” Cian O’Sullivan Age: 21 Club: Kilmacud Crokes Studying: 3rd Year Business and Legal Studies O’Sullivan comes from the same county minor title winners as O’Carroll, however, Cian has only played football since u-16 level. Having played freshers football for UCD, O’Sullivan has also played Sigerson football for the last three years. Cian was also captain of the Dublin u21s which beat Laois in the Leinster final a few weeks ago. Despite this, it is the All-Ireland victory with Crokes that ranks as O’Sullivan’s sporting highlight so far - “It was absolutely fantastic. You would’ve grown up with most of the lads, so it means more to be winning a club championship like that.” Already a member of the Dublin Senior football panel, Cian is conscious of keeping his feet on the ground at such an early stage in his career - “I’m just focused on trying to win the u21s, then we can see how things go with the seniors.”

Blackrock - “I suppose it was great to win something like that at that age.” “All I can do is keep it up, and try and compete at a national level once I leave college.” Mairead Murphy Age: 20 Events Participated in: 60m, 60m hurdles, 100m, 100m hurdles, 200m. There aren’t many athletes in UCD who’ve broken as many national records in their career as Mairead Murphy. With national records in both the junior heptathlon and 4x100 relay, Murphy is one of UCD’s most promising athletes. While winning gold in several national titles, Murphy also competed in the European Junior Championships and the World Junior Championships Getting to represent the senior team in the Europa Cup at the age of 17 ranks as Murphy’s sporting highlight “To be on the same team as the Irish athletes which I aspire to is something I’d consider to be a great achievement.” Murphy’s attention, like most athelets of her calibre, is only towards one event - “Come 2012, it’d be nice to be heading off to London.”

Sport News

UCD’s Rising Stars !"#$%&''#(#$!)*+,-#$.)&/'#0$ the most prominent talent on campus Features Spread Pages 26-27

Issue 11 | Volume 22 | 17th April 2009

FINN-TASTIC STUDENTS WIN Chris Mulhall takes on the Shel’s Damien Brennan; pictures by Barry Hennessy Martin Russell’s men triumphantly continued their winning streak as they overcame Shelbourne last Friday. Skipper Ronan Finn stood out in the impressive win which puts UCD three points clear of Shels atop of the League of Ireland First Division. This Dublin derby came alive only 10 minutes after Shelbourne’s Anto Flood had his goalbound shot blocked by UCD centre back Evan McMillan. However it was the southsiders who struck first. A poor Shels clearance fell to Finn and his through ball exposed the Reds’ poor offside trap. The pass found David McMillan and the striker confidently finished past Shels keeper Dean Delaney to give the Belfield side the lead. Shels immediately tried to make up for their mistake. A Baker corner found Hynes but he failed to get any proper shot on goal, while a David

Shelbourne

UCD

1 3

a two-nil lead. Shels manager Dermot Keely clearly gave his side an earful as

Tolka Park Colman Hanley Crawley cross was spilled by Ger Barron. Thankfully though, the students’ keeper collected at the second attempt. But it was UCD’s fluid passing football that found the net again. Finn released John ‘Rocco’ Reilly on the right. After a mazy run in which he easily evaded Crawley, Rocco’s crossshot found the net via a slight deflection off the unfortunate David McGill. The visitors went in at half-time with

his side came out firing in the second half. Within a minute of the restart, Peter

Hynes’s cross was headed home by substitute Paddy Madden. Impressively though, College remained positive as minutes later, Robbie Creevy’s 25 yard strike was finger tipped around the post by Delaney. However the game effectively ended as a contest on 55 minutes. Tempers were always going to flare as both undefeated teams clashed and McGill’s night hit a new low as he was red carded for an off the ball incident in which he appeared to punch UCD’s Chris Mulhall. With the extra man, UCD went on to score the decisive third goal.Finn again combined with Reilly, and after his incisive run forward, Rocco found the net with a well placed shot from the edge of the penalty area.

Top scorer Ciarán Kilduff was unlucky not to score a fourth, his shot hitting a post. Shels ended the game with nine men, David Cassidy shown a second yellow. The only sour note of the game for the students was Brian Shortall’s sending off three minutes from time for a second bookable offence. However it had little effect on the scoreline and the blues comfortably secured the points. UCD (4-4-2): Barron; Matthews (Leahy 19), Boyle, E McMillan, Shortall; Reilly, Finn, Creevy, Mulhall; Kilduff (Dineen 88) D McMillan (McMahon 65). Subs Not Used: Ward, Brennan.

INSIDE STIFF LITTLE FINGERS

TOO TIGHT? FASHION PAGE 8

PETER SHERIDAN PAGE 10

PAGE 4

WHITE LIES EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW PAGE 6

College Tribune Arts & Culture Supplement | 21.04.09

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

MUSIC

YEAH YEAH YEAHS It’s Blitz ALBUM REVIEW

HHHHH

A lot has been made over the translation of Yeah Yeah Yeahs from pop-punk to synthpop. But Yeah Yeah Yeahs were always a pop band so this is a really bizarre criticism. If you thought Fever To Tell was NY Punk then go check out some No Wave – the 80’s scene most heavily bastardized on Fever To Tell. It’s Blitz! is merely taking another aspect of the NYC legacy that Yeah Yeah Yeahs have found themselves in, a legacy that charts disco and, probably most relevantly, the more recent DFA dominated club scene. With an influence as recent as DFA then, there have been accusations of this record being much less original than anything else put out – something paragraph one probably would disagree with. The thing that seperates It’s Blitz! from anything put out by other synth-dominated or disco-influenced indie is the songcraft on display. Stripping back the distortion has allowed guitarist Nick Zinner to expand his sonic pallete and come up with genuinely moving instrumental pieces. The outros to Soft

Shock, Runaway or Hysteric turn simple little songs into truly epic peices. It’s easy to become more drawn to these slower songs on this record mainly because of the depth contained within Zinner’s minimal compositions. Some of the riffs he’s using have an almost half-finished sense to them, but these gradually reveal themselves through working with other lines pervading the song to build into pieces that are occasionally brilliant. The more uptempo songs always bear the possibility of falling under the weight of these new influences – the formats tend to be more rigid, so Zinner’s abilities here aren’t as obvious. However, even on Dull Life, where the band comes off sounding a little like some Franz-Killer-of-4 knockoff, the strength – well, bravado really – of Karen O stops the band from sounding like anything other than Yeah Yeah Yeahs. Then you have songs like Zero, Heads Will Roll and Dragon Queen where the mixture of what we expect from the group and these new DFA-hinting sounds combine

MUNDY

SUBPLOTS

FLO RIDA

STRAWBERRY BLOOD

NIGHTCYCLES

R.O.O.T.S

It’s fairly easy to dismiss Mundy as a two-hit wonder, but his latest album, Strawberry Blood is surprisingly decent. The odd irritatingly-clichéd lyric aside, the album is filled with melodic tracks that are unapologetically feel-good pop, but with none of the cheese and predictibility of his previous hits. While Gemma Hayes, Shane McGowan and Fergus O’Farrell all feature on the album, their presence is pleasant but unnecessary, as Mundy’s style successfully dominates. His rough and ready voice and understatedly emotionfilled delivery blends perfectly with the simple guitar and strings accompaniment, giving his solo tracks an unexpected charm, as epitomized on the gorgeously lilting title track and the sweetly trickling Fever. Of course, it is Mundy we’re talking about here, so it’s not all be deep and meaningful. Jangling guitars and trademark bursts of harmonicas on tracks

like the foot-stomping Waiting For The Night To Come show how a tune can be both radio and ceili-friendly. Other highlights include I Miss The Country and The Valley, neither of which would be out of place on a Snow Patrol album (but, you know, in a good way.) The best thing about this album is undoubtedly that while the songs are catchy and likeable, they don’t possess the absurdly broad mass-appeal of Galway Girl and July. This offering is more personal which not only results in a more individual and mature sound, but also guarantees that the tracks won’t be ruined by being played more times than Gary Glitter’s DVD of Baby Boom. Roe McDermott

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The Subplots are a new and emerging band from Dublin. Having toured incessantly for the last two years, with the likes of the Foals, No Age and Wintersleep, they have finally found time to release their debut album, Nightcycles. It’s been well worth the wait, as this three piece have certainly created something special. Each song has obviously been given exceptional care and attention. Leech, the debut single from the group, is a wonderfully crafted song which talks about, as the title may suggest, people taking what they can get without giving anything back at all. The song Call To Arms is also something of a gem, with its arrangement and lyrics making it a very interesting song indeed. To this reviewers ear at least this band have been undoubtedly influenced by Radiohead and it’s no bad thing as this album shows. However, a few criticisms remain. The lead singer’s voice can grate at times and in truth most of the songs are very downbeat in mood. In addition, there

is no catchy song on the album to immediately grab the listeners attention although in fairness this is not what Subplots seem to be aiming for. Overall, in spite of those drawbacks, this is a fine debut from a new and upcoming band. Catch them at the official album launch in Crawdaddy on the 8th of May. BRIAN MAHON

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pefectly. The thing about Yeah Yeah Yeahs is that they have always been incredibly self aware – just look at the video from Maps where we see the more human side of Karen O’s visage perfectly captured and consciously explored in a moving way. These songs work because the image pervading the band’s sound has always been of the New York cool that the indier-than-thou scene completely miss out on. The ability to experiment with new palettes with new structures is merely an ability to translate the culutural mix-pot that NYC has always been; Yeah Yeah Yeahs have gone from noise to punk to rock to disco without ever losing their identity as a band, they are the nearest we have to the Blondie-like ability to translate one’s cultural horizons into pop music. We’re back to that word again, ‘pop’ – because this album is simply a collection of 10 great pop songs JOHN FLYNN

Nas, one of the powerhouses of hip hop, stated that hip hop is dead. What he was referring to was the over-produced, lyrically stunted and commercially driven rap that has been coming out of America since the early Noughties; and Flo Rida’s first album Mail On Sunday fits snugly into this bracket. Flo Rida raps about honey-ies, nike-ies and other-ies on many of songs, his flow is drowned out by heavy crunk based beats and there are a hell of a lot of guest appearances throughout. Now, just a little over a year later, has anything changed? The answer is not much. There are still more guest appearances than you could throw your hat at, there is still a production team that would make any Spielberg film jealous and the lyrics are still ridiculously simple. The only thing that has truly changed is that Flo Rida desperately tries to be introverted in a couple of songs, but those efforts come across like two Irish men trying to talk about their feelings.

http://www.mvremix.com/urban/jpg/florida.jpg However, if you look at this album as what it is – something purely designed to make money – then Flo Rida achieves his goals. There are definitely a few very dance-friendly commercial songs: Jump, Right Round and Sugar are three you will definitely be hearing in Q-Bar and Club XXI in the weeks to come. PETER DOWNEY

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College Tribune | 17th April 2009

MUSIC

Don’t turn off your Red Light! Conor McKenna spoke to Red Light Company’s Richard Frenneaux about their rapid rise, the importance of maintaining creative control, and keeping true to their roots “Being in a band is like being married and having unnecessary expectations on your friends.” – wise words from Richard Frenneaux, lead singer of indie band Red Light Company as he spoke about the tense moments that the band has had while touring but he remarked, “we’re all fairly level and most of the time it’s one of the best times of my life”. The band has certainly done well for itself; forming and charting their music within a year is no small feat. Their album Fine Fascination has charted at #13 in the British charts, which the band “never really expected to get anywhere near and it was a really big surprise”. The five-piece have come on in leaps and bounds since their formation in 2007, having toured with Editors and being signed to independent label Lavolta Records shortly after this. With the success of their singles Scheme Eu-

gene and Arts & Crafts, this band could be set to be the next big thing from Britain. With difficulties in the music business, it is becoming harder and harder for new bands to make it big; however Frenneaux stressed the importance of choosing the right label, as Red Light Company themselves went through “one label after another until we found people we trusted and thought got the whole project as a whole”. His voice turned regretful for a moment when he remembers bands that have lost their label of late, such as pop artists Alphabeat. His advice to unsigned bands is to “do as much of it as you can yourself, having control over what you’re doing is important”. Conor McKenna spoke to Red Light Company’s Richard Frenneaux about their rapid rise, the importance of maintaining creative control, and keeping true to their roots Red Light Company has recently come

back from a month-long tour of Austria Italy; Frenneaux states that “There’s always moments when you’re tired but I never question what we’re doing. The good gigs pull you through”. Certainly, touring has some negative consequences for the band apart from mere fatigue. Richard Frenneaux, at least, finds it difficult to write while on tour, with so much moving around, particularly when “You wake up in the same hotel room in a different place”. The intonation in his voice speaks more than the words in this instance – touring, though tiring, is a thoroughly enjoyable experience: “The most exciting thing about music is the travelling and it’s interesting seeing how people receive you in a different country”. So with writing on hold for the time being, what does the future hold for Red Light Company? Well, the singer has been throwing out some ideas in his

studio that he hints will take the group “heading towards a new direction”. The band really wants to work on this album for as long as it can but Frenneaux is anxious to find out “where the next step is”. With influences coming in from Echo And The Bunnymen, The Cure and Interpol, the singer finds that sometimes it is difficult creatively “to step away from the music and be objective”, a problem which many bands have fallen down on. Frenneaux himself doesn’t take much influence from literature, mostly reading “a lot about music and the music industry,” but in his songwriting is very interested in the creation of a combination of “fashion, music and art” like his main influence, David Bowie. Many bands who have reached the level where they have attained a label and are touring Europe in search of stardom tend to lose track of their roots and can come across as either arrogant or bored,

THE HOURS

THE PIXIES

SEE THE LIGHT

DOOLITTLE

It takes a brave band to wade into the anthemic-piano-rock genre at this stage. Die-hard followers of Coldplay/Keane will deride you as a cheap knock-off of their beloved, while those who hate the aforementioned will see you as, well, a cheap knock-off of something that was utterly rubbish to begin with. Yet, in 2007, the Hours arrived with Narcissus Road, and immediately turned heads: ‘Piano rock that’s not pretentious? Why, what a novel thought!’ With the incredibly catchy Ali In The Jungle, the sweet Icarus, and the lyrically brilliant Love You More, this was a group that stood out amongst the mediocrity seemingly endemic in the British indie scene. It shouldn’t have been such a surprise. Between them, the duo had experience working with Elastica, Pulp, Black Grape, UNKLE, and last but not least, Joe Strummer. If there is ever an embodiment of the word ‘pedigree’, it’s this pair. Two years on from their debut, the Hours return with See The Light, they don’t disappoint. As with Narcissus Road, their is a

whereas Frenneaux is enthusiastic, surprised, and excited to have reached that level. The difference in attitudes could be the basis of a band’s ability to remain on the music scene, arguments and tension may bring the media to heel but as Pete Doherty and Oasis have found, this does not always boost album sales. Although the singer has a positive outlook, he is clearly focused on the goal of selling music, and these things combined could guarantee their success. Although Frenneaux himself remarked “I don’t feel we’ve made it even now”, it can be safe to expect more good things from Red Light Company in the near future. Red Light Company play the Academy 2 (with after show DJ set) on the 22nd of May

RELEASED: APRIL 17TH 1989

palpable consistency throughout the record that is sadly lacking from most of the Hours’ peers: No sense of filler here. This is a polished album; well-written, well put-together, well-produced. Particularly representative are Come On, the aptly-named Wall Of Sound, and the epic title track. It’s not perfect, by any means. The ‘palpable consistency’, looked at from another perspective, could be construed as a lack of variety. Nonetheless, this is a group who have cultivated a stellar sound, and as such should be applauded. SEBASTIAN CLARE

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Blame the Pixies. Emo, grunge, all those irritating kids with Slipknot t-shirts, Nickleback, Limp Bizkit, even Linkin Park; it’s all their fault. On the 17th of April 1989 music changed, the most influential alternative rock band released their magnum opus. In all of indie, there may be no single album more borrowed from, adapted, or flat-out ripped-off than the Pixies’ follow-up to Surfer Rosa. When Kurt Cobain wrote Smells Like Teen Spirit, the song which launched a thousand dodgy t-shirts, its loud quite dynamic was plagiarised straight from the Pixies. Even Cobain admitted, “this really sounds like the Pixies. People are really going to nail us for this”. Doolittle laid the groundwork for the 90’s guitar rock movement, taking the standard rock format and infusing it with real energy while allowing for the intelligence of their audience; this in a time when Van Halen was jumping and Rick Astley was top of the charts. Christ, this was the generation that made a millionaire out of Gary “I’m only in Asia for the sunshine” Glitter. Rough times kids but we survived thanks to Black Francis, Joey Santiago, Kim Deal and David Lovering.

Doolittle is almost senselessly varied; mood-altering hooks, poetically insane lyrics, larynx-demolishing screams and surreal croons, surf, thrash, pop, slow burns and races to the finish line, at times it’s hard to keep up. After the promise of Surfer Rosa, the difficult second album turned out to be a genuine classic. Opening with the mesmeric Debaser, with its bass intro, driving drumbeat and distorted guitar, the lyrics loosely based on a scene from Luis Bunuel’s Un Chien Andalou - “got me a movie, I want you to know, slicing up eyeballs, I want you to know”. Then straight into Tame, with the snapping drumbeat and Kim Deal’s superb bass playing alongside those demented lyrics. Thankfully the working title of Whore didn’t survive the recording process, although the band themselves almost shared the same fate; tensions between Francis and Deal became visible to band members and the production team. Bickering between the two marred the recording sessions and led to increased stress among the band members. This was an

album born out of tension, and harnessed to become something brilliant; it was after Doolittle that tensions between Deal and Francis came to a head; Francis famously threw a guitar at Deal during a concert in Stuttgart. On Doolittle, producer Gil Norton showcases the Pixies at their most diverse, distilling the band’s sound and relying heavily on the strong rhythm section of bassist Kim Deal and drummer David Lovering. The emphasis on more textured production took nothing away from the band’s intensity. Francis is at all times in command of the album, quietly stringing us along before turning on us and screaming for attention. This album changed music; the Pixies roared into a decade dominated by glam rock, gave it the finger and continued screaming at the top of their lungs. And everybody turned and took notice. PHILIP CONNOLLY

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

MUSIC

STILL BURNING Jake Burns, frontman and founder member of legendary Belfast punk outfit Stiff Little Fingers, finds time in his hectic touring schedule to chat with Jim Scully about the band’s beginnings, break-up, reunification and enduring appeal.

Optimism was hard to come by in Belfast in the late 70’s. With all the political tension of the time there was little chance of escape for the young people of Belfast, stuck in a troubled society with no outlet for their frustration. The only musical escape for young people at the time was to join the crowds in the dancehalls or wait for the rare occasion that a big name act ventured to that corner of the island. Emerging from the masses of

restless youths were a number of bands thriving on the energy spreading from the punk rock movement which was thriving in London at the same time. One of those bands, Stiff Little Fingers, channeled this energy in their anthem of unrest, Alternative Ulster. “A song like Alternative Ulster, even though it does specifically mention the army and the RUC in it, it’s basically a song about having bugger all to do! It’s

not really a deep political song”. Recorded in 1979, the album Inflammable Material saw a group of friends who were playing music for fun, unwittingly write arguably one of the most legendary punk albums of all time, something the band never expected when starting out. “When you form a band at that age, you’re basically forming a band with your friends just for fun. Again being at the height of the Troubles bands didn’t

tend to come across from the UK to play in Belfast, so our chances of ever actually seeing somebody like The Damned or The Clash seemed very limited, so if we wanted to hear that music live then we were gonna have to damn well play it ourselves.” “That music”, as Burns says, wasn’t too prominent in Belfast more than thirty years ago, but the more the band played the more they uncovered the existence of a handful of similiar acts through the city, “much as Greg Cowan from The Outcasts said, when they started they thought they were the only punk rock band in Belfast. He didn’t know Rudi were playing, that we were playing, and we felt the same.” This new discovery opened up a community of like-minded young people with a new distraction, “Once people of our own age who liked that kind of thing found out there were bands doing it, then there was an audience there, admittedly it was the same audience at every one of the three bands shows, but we knew there was an audience there... Looking back

‘‘This new discovery opened up a community of like-minded young people with a new distraction.’’ now on the early punk rock days when we were playing back in Belfast, there was a definite innocence about the audience, I mean, all anybody really wanted to was to go out and listen to music that appealed to them rather than the stuff they were hearing on the radio, or the showbands, and just actively have a god time and it didn’t really matter whether you were singing abot the Troubles, or whether you were taking exactly the opposite stance like The Undertones did and ignoring it completely. The point was, you were out with people of your own generation, you had discovered something that was actually yours.”

This sense of belonging has seen the band last over thirty years and nine studio albums, enduring a break-up, reformation and various line-up changes throughout. Having left Belfast for London in 1978 the band was used to having to adapt to unusual situations, but over time the outside pressures on the band became too over-bearing, “At 18 you’re just doin’ it as a bunch of mates for a laugh and for fun, over the course of those five years or so it became a business. You’re suddenly aware that you’re not writing songs simply to please yourself and because it’s something you want to do, you’re writing songs now ‘cause somebody from the record company is on the phone saying, ‘its about time we had another record from you lot’”. This aspect of life as a band, and growing tensions within the band, eventually led to the break-up of the band in 1983, ”When we started we were like 18 years old, very young and it was just fun, but as it became more and more of a job, more and more of a business, we grew increasingly apart, everybody wandered off and did their own thing, so by the time we came to make the Now Then record, it was like four different individuals in a room, it wasn’t a band... We had always said if it stopped being fun we would stop doing it. And it just wasn’t any fun anymore, so we stopped doin’ it.” Over four years later, having spent a suitable amount of time apart, a surprise phone call and the influence of a few beers saw the rebirth of Stiff Little Fingers, with the fun, casual attitude restored, “I hadn’t spoken to any of them I don’t think in four years, and out of the blue I got a phone call from Ali, ‘it’s great to hear from you after five years, why don’t we meet up some time and just have a beer’ sorta thing, so we did... One beer became four and four became five and five became six, we started talking about all the bands from our era who had reformed, and by the end of the night we were convinced we were better than any of them and why didn’t we reform. Because if nothing else at least it would get us back to Belfast for Christmas.” Needless to say, the band did make it back to Belfast. Stiff Little Fingers play the Academy on the 22nd of May

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

MUSIC

Peace at its Wildest Andreas Werliin, one half of Swedish pop/jazz combo Wildbirds & Peacedrums, took time out from touring to talk to Sebastian Clare about their latest album and what it’s like being part of a husbandand-wife musical act.

sideways look at...

SPOTIFY This could well be the next big thing in how we listen to music. Currently the service is not available for free in Ireland but that is set to change soon. Spotify is a site that streams music, and will soon be available on portable devices. The major music labels and a few smaller labels – which, in reality, are just off-shoots anyway – have so far been very accomodating with leasing their music to this new service. So we’re looking at something which is setting out to take on the might of the iPod in turns of the availability of music. After the bubble burst on the music industry of old – where the labels charged exorbitant prices for something as cheap to produce as a CD – the labels were quick to jump onto any means of maintaining their dominance of the industry. So agreeing to Apple’s solution – iTunes – in tandem with a hard line policy against filesharing seemed the best way to go. Of course, this hasn’t worked out and the vast majority of music in everybody’s iPod is now ‘illegal’. Making the winner to this digital age of music the hardware manufacturer. However, even this affects the consumer negatively, with most mp3s being ripped at around 128kbp which just isn’t good

enough audio quality. Spotify is then a means of meeting the consumer halfway. The people behind Spotify want to fund the website through ads which currently appear every 20 minutes. This is a model which has been tried before, most famously with Spiral Frog. Spiral Frog collapsed because it did not have the backing of the major labels and because the advertising system was too cumbersome for the consumer. Whether Spotify succeeds or not, the development of the music industry will eventually go down this road. The only question is how can such a model work out best for the record labels. The labels right now are bloated beasts, still expecting the kind of industry that overfed them in the 90’s. Starving the music puchaser by expecting him to pay for music when it is freely available has quite obviously failed – the only ISP stupid enough to get into a situation which could possibly change that has been Eircom. Spotify happens to be coming out at a time where the consumer has started to see personal ownership of information as a novelty rather than a necessity. JOHN FLYNN

from Wednesday 22nd April Just one year after introducing themselves to the world with Heartcore, Swedish duo Wildbirds & Peacedrums have returned with their sophomore effort, The Snake. Where the debut was promising, it’s successor realises the group’s potential, according to Andreas Werliin, “Well, most of all I think it’s the energy that’s more outgoing and has more outpush, there’s a bigger sound and more... We added some instruments like a steel pan and some new string instruments, stuff like that. I think it’s in general more, you know, confident, confident-sounding I guess. The first one was more of exploring, trying out different things and this one has more clear direction I guess.” The pair have just begun touring in support of the new album, and Werliin is pleased with how the first gig went, enthusing the the experience was, “Very good, we have a nice, new sound engineer with us. It was a pleasure, nice, intimate feeling, it was good.” This tour represents the first time that Werliin and vocalist Mariam Wallentin have played some of The Snake’s material outside of Sweden. “Well, in Sweden we’ve played the songs a couple of times but this is the first time we bring the new

instruments outside of Sweden. So it’s exciting, it feels really good, gets a whole new dimension into the music I think.” Two albums in twelve months indicates that the pair will be prolific with their releases, and Werliin reckons that this is because “we’re restless in our nature, I guess you could say! We always find new things, it just happens... and we want to try out new stuff, and the recording is just a natural thing in the whole process, I think.” Werliin explains how he and Wallentin first met and how Wildbirds & Peacedrums became a reality. “We met about five years ago in Gothenburg, we were in the same kind of social scene, and first we were a couple for maybe two years and played in different bands with bigger settings and eh... We just found out that the best thing was just the two of us actually! We started to get rid of people until it was just the two of us left!” Werliin once pointed out that both he and his wife share the ‘Zodiac sign of the Lion’ and thus are both strong-willed and want to be in control – but he stops short of claiming that this creates conflict. ““I think if we had been more than two people, there definitely would have been more conflict, but for some reason the arguments are so few that if there’s

different ideas about some things then it’s actually contributing to the sound and... it’s good to get some friction in it. So is it too much of a struggle? Not at all.” Wildbirds & Peacedrums have shared the stage with various acts, including Efterklang, Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy, Deerhoof and fellow-Swede Lykke Li, but Werliin is unwilling to pick a favourite amongst them. “I think the Lykke Li tour was great because, you know, we had three or four weeks with her, whereas with Efterklang we only played a few shows here and there... I like to think that when we’re doing this we’re getting a big family together in the tour bus, and after a while it’s great fun.” Pushed to identify the highlight of touring, Werliin is uncertain. “I don’t know... I like the feeling when you have no idea where you’re heading and somebody’s picking you up and you’re running up in these strange festivals in forests and eh, yeah... the whole thing is quite exciting to be honest, it’s hard to pick one thing ”. Wildbirds & Peacedrums play Crawdaddy on the 28th of April

Wednesday 22nd April Wildbirds & Peacedrums, CrawAdrian Crowley, Sugar Club, €10, daddy, €13, doors at 8pm doors at 8pm Wednesday 29th April Thursday 23rd April Mundy, Whelan’s, €23, doors at 8.30pm Friday 24th April The Saw Doctors, Olympia, €35, doors at 7.15pm The Rakes, Button Factory, €16, doors at 8pm Saturday 25th April NOFX, Olympia, €38, doors at 7pm Squarepusher, Button Factory, €25, doors at 8pm Sunday 26th April Rolo Tomassi, Academy, €15, doors at 7.30pm Monday 27th April Saxon, Academy, €30, doors at 7pm Richard Swift, Crawdaddy, €15, doors at 8pm Tuesday 28th April The Fray, Olympia, €25, doors at 7.30pm

Raphael Saadiq, Vicar Street, €29, doors at 8pm A Camp, Academy, €16, doors at 7.30pm Thursday 30th April Basshunter, Tripod, €45, doors at 8pm Camera Obscura, Andrew’s Lane, €18, doors at 8pm Friday 1st May The Out Last Knights, Radio City, €7, doors at 8pm Messiah J & The Expert, Academy, €15, doors at 8pm Pony Club, Whelan’s, €15, doors at 7.30pm Saturday 2nd May R.S.A.G., Whelan’s, €13, doors at 8pm Sunday 3rd May The Airborne Toxic Event, Academy, €15, doors at 7.30pm

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

MUSIC

PAINT IT BLACK White Lies have achieved immeasurable success since the release of their debut album, To Lose A Life, which propelled them to a number one spot on the UK album charts. On the cusp of the release of their new single, Farewell To The Fairground, bassist Charles Cave took time out from touring to chat to Heather Landy about their re-birth, touring the global terrain and what lies beneath their unusual sound and style. Originally conceived in the height of their youth, White Lies have refashioned themselves extensively since they first met in music school. Hailing from Shepherd’s Bush and Ealing, London, they have been heralded by critics and music pundits alike as one of the bands to watch out for in 2009. They are young, their sound polished, fresh and definitive of the modern age. White Lies’ origins ultimately lie in the traditional and the local, Cave ascertains, “Jack [drummer] and I have known each other since we were four or five; we even went to a Saturday music school together when we were very young. We all met Harry [lead singer and guitarist] through mutual friends where we spent about six years learning to play together and in the last year we started the band White Lies and I think that was the moment we felt comfortable with what we were doing and with the songs we were writing.” Before White Lies emerged as a band, their previous incarnation was Fear of Flying, an art rock outfit comprised of the same members but musically dissimilar. Their re-emergence as White Lies proved to be a wholly natural transition for the band as Cave informs, “It just felt like there was no other option because we had written two songs, Unfinished Business and Death that we were not just proud of but it was a real awakening for us and we just wanted to make music for ourselves and when these songs came out of that we realised it was a sign.” Like any band, re-birth can signal maturity not only in age but in sound. Elements of a past sound are not wholly forgotten but re-developed into a new genre. Cave continues, “Fear of Flying was just one of the bands we had been in and one of the most

significant of our growing up period. It was very much dictated by whatever was the trend of whatever week we were in and whatever month and whatever styles and it was very important to us because it was a growing up period and everything is kind of strange at that time. We started White Lies and that was when we reached a moment in our lives where we were comfortable and we lost some of those insecurities to do with what music we should be making.” White Lies’ rise to commercial recognition came rather quickly for a band who had only been gigging a couple of months. How

‘‘It was a real awakening for us and we just wanted to make music for ourselves and when these songs came out of that we realised it was a sign.” did a band devoid of promotional bodies of support and contacts in the recording industry land themselves a recording contract? Cave muses, “We put Death and Unfinished Business up on our Myspace about three months before our first show and I think people discovered that pretty quickly and labels got interested fairly quickly from hearing those two songs so we just kept our heads down and we just

rehearsed and rehearsed for a long time; mainly for us it wasn’t just like we don’t want to be bad because we’ll screw up chances of getting signed or anything. We wanted to make sure those songs came across as best as possible live so we spent about three months rehearsing non-stop in a tiny studio and then we went out and did our first show. Fortunately there were record labels there and they were suitably impressed by the show we put on.” A quick album release following by extensive touring was a mutual decision between band and the label. A sudden moment of insight provided the band with a number of songs some of which are the most distinctive on the album. “They [Fiction Records] thought it would be best if we made a record sooner rather than later and just toured and that is exactly what we did but it did mean we were under a lot of pressure because they put us into a recording studio with five or six songs and the rest pretty unknown so we had to write half the album in the studio and that was very intense but most of those songs are probably the favourite on the record so that kind of pressure really lends itself well to the album. In May we recorded the album and since then we have been non-stop touring and it’s been great and we have really honed our skills as a live band.” Lyrically, White Lies connect with the listener and at the same time fascinate. Songs such as To Lose My Life which bear the lyrics, “Let’s grow old together and die at the same time”, while their latest offering, Farewell To The Fairground plays out, “Farewell to the Fairground, these rides are not working anymore, goodbye to this dead town until the ice begins to thaw”,

signify a band lyrically searching for music that touches the soul, the inner sanctum. The song writing process ultimately proves to be one of the most difficult components in the business of music making. Charles stresses, “I write the lyrics and then Harry and I work on the melodies and the foundation of the song with the keyboard. Then after that’s ready and it can take an hour or a few days, it depends. Then the really hard work comes in when we turn it more into a band kind of sound. We spend a hell of a long time doing the drums because that is so crucial to the arrangement of our songs and how they kind of build up and down; the tension within them. Then after that obviously the bass and the guitars; it is a long process and we don’t like to play songs live until we have at least demoed them or recorded them in some way because we find we learn a lot of the crucial kind of lessons after we have tried recording them once and we can re-evaluate certain parts.” Their sound is definitely dark and almost macabre. Lyrically bleak; the bass is heavy; Harry’s vocals deep and reminiscent of a young Ian Curtis, drums are static and prominent. The inclination is to ask whether their sound is derivative

from past experience or merely the work of their musical imagination. “Definitely that sound comes from our personalities and our experiences; they are not constant experiences and I think humans tend to remember and be affected by the sadder and more melancholy times in their life than they do happy times. We are fairly upbeat people most of the time; we just draw on those kinds of emotions in a time of heightened creativity. It is not something you can feel the whole time but I have always felt that song writing and songs should be very much about a removed part of life and a removed part of your thoughts. I don’t like to write songs or listen to songs that are too close to real life. I like them to come from either somewhere buried or very deep inside you or very much pure imagination and that is what I have always liked. That is what I like to write lyrics about.” The press have compared them countless times as heralding a new age of post-punk derivative from the 80’s heyday of Talking Heads, Teardrop Explodes and Joy Division while their sound has also been seen as a similar re-definition of modern days examples such as Interpol and Editors. Cave is quick to dispel any dominant

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

influences in their overall sound. He notes, “We definitely don’t share any bands that we are all majorly influenced by bar may be a couple. We really like the Secret Machines especially their first record and we like Nick Cave and Talking Heads. I think we have all been inspired to make music by very different groups growing up. The main influences and inspiration comes from personal experiences.” Only a few months previous the band enjoyed basking in the glory of sharing a performing slot with the Cure as part of the NME Big Gig. This gave White Lies the chance to perform to a new audience, an audience not acquainted with their sound; certainly a challenge for a band only in the beginning of their musical journey. “It was certainly very tricky and one of the trickier gigs we have played. We were kind of in the presence of greatness to some degree and in the presence of their fans who are very dedicated and are kind of there only for one thing and so we had to work very hard to win people over at that show but it was an honour to play alongside the Cure. They are such a well respected and legendary band and have kept doing what they do for so long and that alone was a huge compliment for us.”

Leading on, we were intrigued to learn if White Lies find the prospect of playing in huge arenas daunting or does an intimate show appeal more, “I think as a general rule I would prefer more intimate shows. It really depends on the mood and you can’t to some degree control that. You have to go out on stage in the right frame of mind and if you don’t you are really lost. That is partly down to you, you have to get yourself psyched up before you play no matter where it is and the crowd has to be in the same frame of mind. There are things that can affect that. Then at the same time we had done a couple of festivals last year; we played Latitude festival. We walked on stage and at a significant moment in the first song where it kind of breaks down, suddenly the sky went completely overcast and ominous but no it was perfect because it didn’t actually rain; it really was an amazing moment and you just can’t control that kind of thing and everyone felt it and from then on it really was a brilliant show. As a rule I certainly like to feel as close and as physically connected to people [audience] as possible.” 2009 also sees White Lies gracing the stage at Oxegen, having already played there last year as an unknown collective. Other

MUSIC

than that, a number of scheduled international dates are also confirmed, “Last year we did Fuji rock festival in Japan and Lollapalooza in Chicago and this year we are doing Coachella Festival just outside LA, California which is in the desert. For us it is most exciting to do those ones.” The first international leg of their tour begins in the States – Cave stresses that although it is a month long that doesn’t allow for them to spread their sound through the continent, “We are going to America in a couple of weeks for a month long tour but to be honest it sounds like a long time because a month in America is really nothing. You

‘‘I don’t like to write songs or listen to songs that are too close to real life. I like them to come from either somewhere buried or very deep inside you or very much pure imagination and that is what I have always liked.’’ can’t really do a show everyday but the drive, the distances between states and towns is so far that a month really doesn’t get you anywhere. California and the UK are about the same size and that just puts

into perspective how big America is. So we are going to try our best, we are doing the David Letterman show out there and that reaches a lot of people and draws people to our band. You have to take things slowly in other countries. There are only so many days in the year anyway.” As a band of the moment, White Lies’ sound lends itself to an exploration of the creative, delving into the feeling, the imagination, to produce music that grabs

your attention lyrically and musically. Stylistically modern and brimming with ambition, this band is certainly deserved of the critical attention they have been receiving over the past couple of months from every media outlet that so exists. These men do not lie, their music is that promising. White Lies perform at the Oxegen festival on the 12th of July

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

FASHION

Puddle of Mud Move away from the tan and flip flops, Jessica Whyte advises Summer is arguably the season most anticipated by the student population who eagerly await four months of college free fun and frolics, spontaneous adventures and above all some summer lovin’. Realistically however, these positive sentiments are not felt by all. Mingling amongst these millions of summer lovers is the occasional summer loathers who curse the arrival of May 1st with a vengeance, not for the fear of getting sun burnt on this balmy tropical island but for the shocking, appalling and down right offensive ensembles sported by the student population of Ireland. Whether it is the sloppy sound of flip-flips clacking up Grafton Street or the rancid smell of a four day old spray tan oozing from the back of an over enthusiastic socialite in a packed nightclub, the summer season pushes fashion lovers to the brink of insanity. In the minefield that is the summer social calendar, no event reeks more havoc on the Irish fashion scene than the music festival. There was once a time when the festival look was actually something to be admired and complimented. The photos of a care free Kate Moss trudging through the Glastonbury slop in wellies and a windbreaker caused quite a stir throughout the fashion industry and general youth culture. It is no surprise that images of a traditionally couture clad supermodel, chilling out in not Gucci or Stella but clothes of all things, inspired girls to quite literally hop on the band wagon. As is the case with

most trends, it wasn't long before the general masses got their grubby hands on this innovative festival look and rapidly turned into a repulsive mesh of prissy meets pauper. Last August the Irish Times published a cringing front page photo of a group of South Dublin sows dragging their wheelie suitcases through the fields of Punchestown in short summer dresses, psychedelic wellies and Dior sunglasses...need any more be said? What is by far the most comical element to the Irish take on festival chic is how they genuinely see themselves as trendy individuals with an elite fashion and musical taste. Events such as Oxygen and Electric Picnic have become breeding ground for those who spend weeks meticulously compiling outfits with the aim of being regarded as laid back and care-free. Music festivals have always been associated with self expression and creativity which no fashion lover could help but support. The culture of festivals has had some ground-breaking moments and has been accredited as being the birthplace of the modern bohemian trend which has seeped into sub cultures throughout the world. Irish students have failed to even consider this fundamental cornerstone of festival tradition and have soiled its reputation by cultivating a mainstream look in order to fit in with the crowd that are ironically trying to express their own unique sense of style.

The Worst Fashion Trends of the Past Year Sometimes all you can do is look back and laugh Leggings as Trousers: Mischa Barton and Lindsay Lohan, what have you done? If you are confident that your legs are skinny enough not to look like spandex-clad sausages in leggings and are tempted to try this trend, you should know three things. Number one: You are hated by all of us with thighs, Number two: You still have no excuse for leaving the house without pants, since Number three: The material and cut is never going to make your ass look anything other than hideous. Put some clothes on, no-one wants to see that. Guys’ skinny jeans: Are you are in fact thirteen years old with parents who don’t understand you, a journal full of bad poetry and a confused sexual orientation? No? Then for God’s sake, bin the skinny jeans. Guys, you have skinnier legs than us ladies, a fact we don’t need to be reminded of, and neither do we need to be worrying that all circulation to your nether regions has been cut off by skintight denim. Our fantasies of you as the sexy epitome of masculin-

ity are somewhat dashed when you’re wandering around looking like a eunuch-like eight year old Ethopian child from the waist down. Shutter shades: If the fact that these bizarre, pointless and attention-seeking accessories are beloved by the bizarre, pointless and attention-seeking fashion disasters that are Kanye West and Lady Gaga hasn’t set alarm bells ringing, there’s probably no hope for you. Just know that when you’re asking people for a ride on their disco-sticks, they’re wondering why your eyes need horizontal Venetian blinds covering them. High-waisted Jeans: In theory, these seemed like such a good idea; who didn’t embrace a style that promised to eliminate the muffin-top epidemic that was sweeping the nation? Unfortunately we discovered that girls wearing jeans so high-waisted their crotches seem to end where their bra begins is not the most enticing style going. Camel toe just isn’t sexy. And if that doesn’t con-

vince you, the fact that smothering your stomach in bulky denim adds an inch or thirty should. Eighties: Our economy may be as bad as it was in the eighties, but do our outfits have to be too? Neon colours are rarely anything other than unflattering, tacky and cheaplooking, acid wash jeans are not only horrible but the light colour can make your thighs look like two mating sea-lions, and wearing tiny shorts and t-shirts covered in lurid Miami beach prints does not make Irish weather hotter, or render you any cooler. Want to go Eighties? Staple some butter vouchers and “Miners on Strike!” signs to your top; at least that way you’ll look political, not pitiful. Shredded Tights: Go to the trainstation restroom, offer your services to whatever guy is in there and use your earnings to buy yourself a ticket because you’re on your way Hookerville, U.S.A. Roe McDermott

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

FASHION

What’s in

Students Pick their Favourite Fashion Item

Asymmetric: Dare to bear.... at least a shoulder. One-shouldered tops can look quite slick without being over the top for a day wear top. A one-shouldered dress looks especially well and is a versatile look as it will look well on most dress styles, short or long.

Aoife Ryan asks what is the one thing you couldn’t go without out? Aisling 2nd year Arts student: I really like labels to be honest so something like my Miu Miu shoes are a must. A bit of bling tends to brighten up my day so if I couldn’t have my shoes it would have to be some gold jewellery. I can’t really pick one thing though because I do need a bag too, for practical reasons...a big shoulder bag preferably in black would be best. Damien 3rd year science: Definitely my short leather jacket. It goes with everything and keeps me cosy, enough said. Siobhan Arts 2nd year: My H&M belt. It changes an outfit from day to night and also from shit to hot, if I am to be honest.

Jo 2nd year Arts: Something like a good dependable pair of jeans, mainly because of weather reasons and as long as they’re not too mad you can’t really go too wrong can you?

Coloured lips: Tropical-coloured lips may sound strange but coral red, fuchsia and mango-orange lips are right on target. Glossy reds, in particular bright scarlet are the constants that keep arising too.

Nathalie 2nd year Business: For now it’s this little flowy light pink top I bought in the Urban Outfitters’ sale. It can go over any plain top and make it look a bit fancier and more thought out. My Babyshambles t-shirt has some sentimental value because it was given to me by the sexy lead singer, so this too. I’m going to buy a straw hat soon though and that will be my new summer fad.

Summer swimwear: This is something we really shouldn’t be afraid of! If you have anywhere to go, either a non-sport label one piece, patterned or coloured two-piece bikinis are essential. Glamorous 1950sstyle long tops with matching bikini bottoms are the less revealing option widely available.

Top Tip:

What not to Watch TV needs to spruce up on style Aoife Smyth

Style inspiration can be taken from magazines, books, shop windows and street style. But when it comes to the old reliable television, is there really much out there to inspire us? There is Fashion TV, an entire channel dedicated to fashion, with constant fashion shows being played. This is on the spot for fashion prediction for the next season and as good as fashion TV is for ideas on what the designers are at, where do us common folk come in? In terms of a good, substantial fashion programme, no one has managed to impress much. We all know Trinny and Susannah's show, "What not to Wear", where so-called friends nominate ladies who in their opinion, need a stern talking to in terms of their wardrobe choices. Now it’s all fine and good in theory, but sometimes Trinny and Susannah's approach can be a little, well... odd. Firstly they spy on their victim, who is secretly filmed prior to the show. The mentors sit in their apartment gasping and almost hugging each other for comfort from the ghastly sights which they are enduring. Susannah then says "Your best friends won't tell you what not to wear", with Trinny adding in "But were not your friends". Charming ladies! They put her in a room full of mirrors in her skivvies and show her what is good and, usually, not so

Well groomed eyebrows enhance your beauty. Pluck eyebrows before bedtime so any redness will disappear overnight. Use a pair of slant edge tweezers which grip hairs easily. Comb hairs one way and then the other to remove loose hairs. Pluck hairs between the brows and any stragglers. Never remove the hairs from above your eyebrows. Pluck each hair individually close to the root. Work in the direction of the growth. Always avoid over plucking. To tame stray hairs just use hair gel and comb through to neaten.

good. They give the lady a basic outline about what to buy for her shape and send her out with a wad of cash. At the end of the show, the woman is generally happier in herself, even though her journey was bumpy along the way. In a way "what not wear" should be called "how to make middle age women confident". As all it is really doing is telling individuals to embrace their shape. A show which was shown on BBC recently, "Twiggy's frock exchange", had so much potential to be a treat for the fashionista in us, but just didn't hit the spot. The general idea behind it is one hundred women bring clothing which they have tired of in and swap it. They have a team of seamstresses who show women how to re-invent pieces, and personally this was the only part of the show which could be deemed enjoyable. It had an essence of Blue Peter for grown- ups. Each week different celebrities join the panel and kindly donate something to the frock exchange and women in the crowd fight to the death for these items, convincing the celeb why they deserve it more. The show is pretty pointless, as watching people acquire nice things isn't really too fun. Hopefully some day with a flick of the remote, there will be a pleasant surprise with what television has to offer. For now, the Simpsons will do.

What’s out: Massive shoulder pads: Don’t listen to anyone who says these are back with a bang! They will always look seriously dated and masculine. Jackets with slight padding are fine but stay away from large, angled shoulders.

Ripped jeans: The same type is usually faded in all the wrong areas as well just to eliminate any chance the shape would be flattering. Instead of looking grungy it looks as if you are trying too hard. Harem pants: Again, they may be said to be in style but who do these flatter? They may be puffy enough to fit your laptop in without anyone noticing, but girls, that is the job of the bag. Unless in Arabia or from there, don’t.

10 IFI FILM

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

FILM

Jail Break

GOVERNMENT GUFFAWS IN THE LOOP HHHHH

Plot: British Secretary of State for International Development, Simon Foster, makes contradictory declarations concerning Britain’s entry into a war and soon finds himself used as a pawn by both British and American administrations in the run up to the crucial vote on the issue in the UN. British government spin doctor, Malcolm Tucker, is assigned the task of ensuring the bill passes and that Foster and his haphazard entourage in Washington don’t make a fool of the Prime Minister. Verdict: Possibly possessing the most

BACK TO BASICS

creative use of profanities in recent film history, Armando Iannuci’s expansion of his masterfully satirical BBC series, The Thick of It, is one of the funniest films of the year. The sublimely irreverent creation that is Malcolm Tucker, played with incessant relish by Peter Capaldi, is transferred fully intact to the big screen as is the hapless assistant to the minister, Toby. James Gandolfini’s plays gleefully against type as a pacifist U.S General while the bickering of the youthful interns in the US government is unceasingly entertaining. Nicholas Broadstock

Peter Sheridan took time out of a very busy schedule to chat to love of the stage and his latest project, directing the upcoming shank Redemption “I’ve always loved theatre because of the fact that it’s just the simplest form of telling a story. You’ve got one group of people in the room and you have another group watching.” So says critically acclaimed writer, actor and director, Peter Sheridan who explains his lifelong fascination with the stage. One look at Sheridan’s body of work which include books and plays makes it impossible not to notice his passion for the arts. So, as for his influences which led him this direction, Sheridan claims his upbringing was the main one. “Clearly my dad was the big influence in that as he introduced me and my brother Jim to the theatre when we were in our teens and he started a local drama group, an amateur drama group but we fell in love with it. I was about sixteen and Jim was about nineteen so that was our entrée into that world.

From the moment I discovered the magic of the theatre I was hooked.” His interest in telling a good story is obvious from the adoring way he speaks about it. “I think fundamentally all story telling is like the kitchen table at night; In our kitchen my dad used to tell stories, have a few bottles of stout, sing a few songs, he’d argue with my mother, then he’d argue with us about the politics of the day so that’s a form of theatre. Then you transform that into a form of theatre but it’s not much different.” “I remember when we did the O’Casey plays, they felt like an extension of our kitchen, so it didn’t feel like there was a separation between art and life so it just felt to me the theatre was a great way to explore one’s life and other peoples lives in a really dynamic way so that’s probably why I’ve been hooked on it

FAST AND THE FURIOUS HHHHH

Plot: The latest installment of the Fast and the Furious series is surprisingly good. This one sees Paul Walker and Vin Diesel return in an adrenaline filled, action packed film. Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) has lost the woman he loved to heroin dealer and seeks revenge. He is helped by agent Brian O’ Conner (Paul Walker) in taking down the head of the organisation and getting revenge on the man who killed his girlfriend. Verdict: This movie takes CGI and stunt

work to the extremes and some of the crash scenes and explosions can only be defined by one word; awesome. This movie takes the good things from the first film of the series but makes them better. The pumping soundtrack, the mindless crash scenes and the budding love story gives something for everyone to enjoy in this film. If you have seen some of the other sequels that were so disappointing you we will be happy to see that director Justin Lin didn’t mess this one up. Max Harding

ever since.” Whether it’s the book or the film, The Shawshank Redemption is well known to most. The attempt to bring it to the stage has been met with a lot of difficulty but after having finally secured permission, the world stage première is set to take place in Dublin on the 14th May. With so much buzz surrounding the play, one might wonder why Ireland was the chosen place for the premiere. Sheridan lets out a burst of laughter before explaining; “It seems illogical doesn’t it? We kind of regard it as an honour that Stephen King has allowed the stage premiere of it to happen in Dublin. It was kind of an accidental thing; it just so happens that the two adapters of this piece Owen O’Neill and Dave Johns were working on a show together and both got on really well and discovered a mutual interest and love for The Shawshank Redemption.” “So they found an Irish producer and between them they applied for the rights and surprise surprise, they got permission to stage the show in Ireland. They never even gave permission for it to be staged anywhere before that, so in a way it’s kind of a fortuitous thing for it to be happening in Dublin but we’re delighted.” Sheridan claims the story is perfect for stage adaption for one particular reason and explains what the play plans to

FILM RETROSPECTIVE

THE BLUES BROTHERS

SPACE CRAP

On a Mission from God

OUTLANDER HHHHH

Plot: An alien, namely Kainan (Jim Caviezel), crashes his spaceship into earth circa 709 A.D. and is soon captured by Vikings who blame him for a slaughter in a nearby village. Kainan, who is human in form, claims that he is not responsible; “I’m hunting a dragon.” Kainan tells his hostile captors when they ask why he’s in their territory. The explanation doesn’t go down well. The Vikings don’t trust a word the ‘outlander’ says until their own village is attacked by a mysterious creature; something that Kainan brought with him from outer space.

Verdict: This film will give you some mild entertainment, mainly in the form of unintentional humour. The Vikings were laughable due to the fact they’re so overloaded with rage and testosterone it seems like they’re on steroids. The alien plot was more interesting but we don’t understand enough about Kainan’s far off world to appreciate it fully. Overall the combination of Vikings and aliens didn’t really gel successfully and, although his concept is somewhat original, so many moments in the film seem like a deja-vu from somewhere else. Katie Godwin

After his release from prison, ‘Joliet’ Jake Blues (John Belushi) is reunited with his brother Elwood (Dan Aykroyd), and together they resolve to save the Catholic orphanage in which they grew up from foreclosure. In order to do so, they must somehow find $5000 to pay the tax assessor, and thus they endeavour to reform their rhythm n’ blues band and earn the money with a big gig. Written by Aykroyd and director John Landis, the film is a musical comedy romp based around the eponymous characters developed on Saturday Night Live, and features numerous high-profile cameos including Cab Calloway, Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin, James Brown, even a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it turn from

1980

Steven Spielberg. Accompanied by one of, if not the greatest soundtrack ever, exhibiting such classics as She Caught The Katy, Sweet Home Chicago and Jailhouse Rock, this is a movie that has everything. The Blues Brothers unwittingly stumble into various trials and tribulations; hunted by the ‘Illinois Nazis’, repeatedly involved in police chases, getting on the wrong side of a ludicrous country-and-western troupe, and shadowed by a mystery woman seemingly bent on murdering Jake and making a series of outlandish attempts on his life – to which the brothers seemingly remain blissfully oblivious. There are visually-impressive setpiece musical performances, involv-

ing some top-notch choreography; highlights include the scene in which Ray Charles’ character bursts into Shake Ya Tailfeather in order to convince the band that “there’s nothing wrong with the action in this piano,” and the whole neighbourhood seems to spontaneously join in with the dance routine. The real comedic draw is the script, punctuated by hilarious dialogue and ludicrous moments aplenty. Why not sign off with the best exchange: “It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.” Hit it. Sebastian Clare

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

MUSIC FILM

5 films to ruin your...

HOLIDAY MOOD Hostel

Cathy Buckmaster about his theatre adaption of the Shawfocus on. “The first thing is that 95 percent of the drama takes place within walls of the Shawshank prison so you have a single location which makes it immediately amenable.” “It’s really a first class adaptation of the story. We’ve concentrated very heavily on the relationship between Andy and Red; we’ve developed that relationship more than it is in the film so they get more stage time together than they do in the film.” Although Sheridan says he’s sticking more to the book than the film, they had the difficult decision concerning the character of Red and whether they wanted to go with the red haired, Irish character the book depicts or Morgan Freeman’s much beloved portrayal which the film offers. “The book really is our source material; it’s like having a great handbook that you can always go back to. There’s obviously a lot more about the characters in the novella that didn’t necessarily come through in the film so we’ve been able to go back the book and unearth stuff about the characters and then develop that into drama so it’s been a really remarkable process and I’m, in a way,

rediscovering the story.” “In the original book, the character of Red is a white Irish guy with red hair. In the film they made the decision to make him a black guy and we’ve funnily enough gone with that decision as well because I think in making that decision, they added some wonderful layers to the story and we’re happy to piggyback on the back of that wonderful decision but that’s about it.” As for the difficulties they face putting the story on stage, Sheridan explains. “There’s a wonderful thing you can do in film called flashback to explain something that really needs to be explained, which clearly you can’t do on stage. Stage is a more linear medium; you have to follow a true line.” Sheridan goes on to explain that Ireland was one of the few places to embrace the film when it came out and why The Shawshank Redemption was not a major Box office hit on its release. “I was a fan of the film before the book, I saw it on its release here in 1994 and strangely one of the few places the film was a hit on its release was Ireland.” “In America, the film didn’t do well at all and they blamed it on the title, the Shawshank Redemption. They said Americans didn’t want to see a film with redemption in the title because they didn’t know what it meant and you combine redemption with Shawshank and you’re kind of thinking this has to be the worst title for a film of all time. What happened in America is that it got Oscar nominations but wasn’t successful at the box office but it went on to become the biggest selling movie DVD of all time. So it has become a monster hit on DVD. But in Ireland it ran for eight months it was so popular.”

He finishes with an anecdote concerning a chance meeting with the star of the film’s adaption of this much loved story. “I actually met Tim Robbins in New York about twelve years ago when I was working on a project about Brendan Bean, and Tim Robbins’ dad was a kind of a poet in New York in the 50s and he knew bean. So I met Tim Robbins in that context and he said his dad loved the Irish and loved he rebels and I was able to tell Tim that The Shawshank Redemption had been a great hit in Ireland and he was so surprised; he had no idea.” The world stage premiere of The Shawshank Redemption directed by Peter Sheridan opens on Tuesday 19th May for a limited run with previews from the 14th May 2009.

PICK OF THE WEEK

A Fine Bromance Plot: Peter Klaven (Paul Rudd) has always been more of a girl’s guy and finds himself flummoxed in male company. In the run up to his wedding he realizes that he has nobody to be his best man and decides it’s time he got some buddies. Following a string of disastrous man-dates he’s just about ready to give up on having someone to hold the ring on his big day when he meets and strikes an instant bond with free spirited Sydney Fife (Jason Segal). The two become inseparable, bonding over music and a love of fish tacos, Sydney’s happy go lucky lifestyle makes Peter question why his own way of life and causes a string of arguments with fiancé Zoey. In

Alive

Three backpackers venture to a hostel in Eastern Europe following a promise that the place is full of promiscuous women who only want tourists. Upon arrival in Bratislava, the trio find that the hostel is everything and more of what they expected and they believe they have found the lost paradise of sex on Earth. However pleasure turns to pain the following morning as the horrors of the hostel holiday begin. The sex hungry holiday makers await a fate worse than a fate worse than death. This is definitely one to avoid if you’re considering an inter-railing holiday this summer The Last King of Scotland

See next page to win free tickets for the Shawshank Redemption.

I LOVE YOU MAN HHHHH

the end, Peter is left to choose between his fiancé and his new found friend and confidante. Verdict: Although Judd Apatow wasn’t involved in this, it certainly fits neatly into the ‘Bromance’ genre he has been devising over the past few years and could easily stand up against ‘Superbad’ or ‘Pineapple Express’. Rudd and Segal lead a first-rate cast through this hilarious and incredibly charming film. The two leads have effortless chemistry which was apparent in ‘Forgetting Sarah Marshall’ and is used to great effect here. Rashida Jones is sympathetic and likable as Peter’s fiancé and Jon Favreau gives a scene-

when it inhabitants realise that a hungry white shark has chosen it as a new feeding grounds. If you are intending to embark on a peaceful beach holiday this summer you should definitely refrain from watching this film. Otherwise you’ll find yourself sweltering hot and standing on the oceans edge afraid to dip your toe in.

A Scottish doctor travels to Uganda for adventure and falls willingly into the service of corrupt dictator Idi Amin, whilst there. The doctor begins his journey with good intentions to help the less-fortunate but unfortunately becomes seduced by Amin’s charm, charisma and impressive lifestyle and agrees to become his personal physician. He is then further promoted as Amin’s political adviser. Soon he becomes trapped in the political inner circle which he realises is brutally damaging the African economy. He tries to pull out of the situation but finds out too late that Amin is a force too torturous and brutal to be reckoned with. UCD overseas beware.

A film based on a true story about a rugby team whose plane crashed into the Andes Mountains. The team are left stranded in the freezing cold with meagre rations and are forced to do anything and everything they can to stay alive against insurmountable odds including an avalanche, starvation and illness. The graphic injuries and suffering are hard to watch but the most gut wrenching feature of the movie is the final resort to cannibalism in an effort to combat starvation; "If I die, you can eat me," is one of the more memorable lines from the film. An obvious one to avoid if you’re heading off in a plane in the coming months Snakes on a Plane

Jaws

stealing, understated performance as Zooey’s best friend’s disagreeable husband. However it’s Rudds ability to play earnest and socially awkward without coming off as goofy and conceited that really gives the film its heart. James O’Hagan

One night after a beach party a young unsuspecting girl goes skinny-dipping beside a tourist resort called Amnity Island and gets dragged underwater screaming in pain. The island soon becomes a place of terror

This is yet another film about a plane crash. When Sean Jones witnesses a murder, he is asked to fly from Hawaii to Los Angeles to testify against the notorious gangster Eddie Kim. However, Kim has paid an assassin to release a crate-full of deadly snakes loose when the plane is 30,000 feet in the air. Only FBI agent Neville Flynn can protect Sean and rally the passengers together in hope of landing in L.A. alive. This film features every disaster that could happen on a plane and more and although a struggle against snakes on a plane is ridiculous and highly unlikely, it should be avoided by anyone with a fear of flying and a tendency of envisaging ‘what ifs’ while in the air. Katie Godwin

College Tribune | 17th April 2009

THE SKIP

MARCUS’ SUMMER DELIGHT In preparation for the lazy hazy summer days ahead, Marcus O’Laoire shows you how to prepare the ultimate barbeque food, the bacon double cheese burger.

COMPETITION

Something to sink your teeth into

Who wrote ‘Rita Hayworth and The Shawshank Redemption’?

HOMEMADE BACON DOUBLE CHEESEBURGERS Always a favorite after a night out; these burgers are easy to make and will taste infinitely better than anything you'll get from a chipper. Healthier too!

You will need: 1 pack of lean mince Half an onion, diced Some garlic, to taste Salt Pepper Mustard Cheddar cheese, but you can go nuts and use any kind of cheese you want, from Emmenthal to blue; however, Sliced cheddar works best for the purpose Tiny drop of red wine Mixed herbs Whatever sauces you want, like ketchup, BBQ or mayo

Streaky bacon Burger buns or good bread Lettuce, pickles, tomatoes or whatever you like on your burger. Here’s how you do it... 1. Get a large bowl and put everything except the bacon, buns, sauces and cheese in. 2. Mix it up really well, so that everything is blended. 3. Form your patties, make sure you compress them really tight or they will fall apart during cooking. 4. Once your patties are formed, put them in

the fridge for a few hours, this will let all the flavours mingle. 5. Whenever you want to eat your burgers, just take them out of the fridge, heat up a pan nice and hot with some olive oil and fry them up. 6. Fry your bacon a few minutes after you've put in the burger and it will be perfect. 7. Build it up; the order is quite important. 8. Toast the buns, this'll stop them getting soggy. Then your first patty, followed by a slice of cheese, sauce, bacon, a second patty, another slice of cheese, one more slice and then whatever else you want. 9. Eat and enjoy; these are delicious!

The first three people to email; tribfilm@gmail. com will each receive a pair of tickets for the 3pm matinee of The Shawshank Redemption on Saturday 16th May.

BOOKS Hot off the Shelf The Gargoyle tells the unique and memorable tale of a male porn star (unnamed) who has an irreversible turn of fate after becoming burned and disfigured in a car fire. As he bitterly explains the medical procedure of skin graphing, the reader grasps the irony of the situation but it is put more succinctly in the protagonists own words; “The irony was not lost upon me that after making all my money in the skin trade, I was now trading all my money for skin,” he says, once he has been transformed into the gargoyle of this book’s title. Unsurprisingly, this man’s future looks despairingly bleak until he receives an unexpected visit from a psychiatric patient named Marianne Engle. She is convinced that she is 700 years old and that she knew the narrator earlier in her life, around the time of the Reformation in Europe. The narrator (and reader) cannot help feeling intrigued by her bright conversation and stories of her ‘past’. Although he knows that she is crazy,

THE GARGOYLE ANDREW DAVIDSON he cannot help being impressed by her story which he later discovers is unfailingly historically plausible. Gradually, the novel changes from a shocking rant to a cheesy, albeit in the tastiest way possible, love story. “those unsolvable eyes,” and “that riotously entangled hair” of Marianne have captivated the protagonist and he falls in love with her. Unfortunately the fire has burned away his penis and left his scrotum looking “for all the world like a tumbleweed on the abandoned street of a ghost town.” However frustrated, he develops a strong relationship with her that is more satisfying than any other he has had “only after my skin was burned away did I finally become able to feel.” He confesses. The irony is bitter sweet like the book itself. Beautiful, bizarre, brilliant, bemusing, boundless… Highly recommended. Katie Godwin

Comic Brilliance “Who watches the watchmen?” This is the famous line from the 1985 graphic novel which has experiencedresurgentpopularityinrecentmonthsthanks toafilmadaptationandcannowbefoundondisplay tables in bookshops all over the country. Set in an alternative 1985, where America has won the Vietnam War and Nixon is serving his third term as president, the story centres on a group of masked adventures who protected the world from criminals until they were forced into retirement by a law banning their existence. Now, as some of their numbers are killed off in suspicious circumstances, they are forced back into action. The investigations into the deaths are lead by Rorschach, a somewhat psychotic man, who has forsaken his true identity and become his alter ego. He is assisted by the Nite Owl and the Silk Spectre,

WATCHMEN ALAN MOORE & DAVE GIBBON who are thrown into the action when the Silk Spectre’s husband Dr. Manhattan, the only traditional superherointhebook,goesintohidingleavingearth on the brink of nuclear war and Ozymandias, now one of the wealthiest men in the world. Voted as one of Time magazine’s 100 greatest novels, Watchmen is more than just a comic. The story andvarioussub-plotsgrabtheattentionofthereader and hook you them in. You will begin to sympathise with and root for certain characters, and become invested in their journey through the course of the book. The startling images and the clever dialogue combine to make this a great novel which will have you thinking about it for days after you put it down. Charlotte McCarthy