STRIVE Prep Excel Speaks! Cafe Cultura Community Speaks Project #12 Xpress Yourself Workshop Participants
STRIVE Prep Excel Speaks! Copyright Š 2014 by Xpress Yourself Workshop Participants All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the author.
To STRIVE Prep Excel students‌continue striving to reach your goals.
Acknowledgments Thank you to STRIVE Prep Excel staff for providing us the opportunity to assist your students in telling their stories. Shout out to all Xpress Yourself workshop participants for sharing your time, energy, and words. Remember: “It’s our responsibility and choice to express ourselves and lift our voice, together building unity, leaders in our community. This is how we tell our stooorrrryyyy!”
Foreword Despite the recent acts of racism in North Denver, STRIVE Prep Excel scholars show that hope continues to emerge from the neighborhood. This collection of stories from high school freshmen serve as a reminder of that fact. We hope you enjoy the poems presented here and use them as examples of how you too can express yourself and tell your own story. For those who do not know about organization: Café Cultura is an award-winning arts, culture, and youth development organization in Denver that promotes unity and healing among Indigenous peoples through creative expression while empowering youth to find their voice, reclaim oral and written traditions, and become leaders in their communities. Café Cultura has been providing positive, creative, and engaging community spaces for the Denver metropolitan area for more than nine years. The idea for our organization emerged during the summer of 2004 with the passing of respected elder and veteran poet Abelardo “Lalo” Delgado. At that moment, we realized and accepted our responsibility to continue using our oral and written traditions to provide opportunities for creative expression not offered in schools or in the larger community. Café Cultura also drew inspiration from the movements connecting Indigenous people from throughout the Americas. In that spirit of Red/Brown Unity, we hoped to use creative expression to unify people representing southern Indigenous nations, known by terms such as “Chicana/o,” “Mexicana/o,” and “Latina/o,” with those Natives of northern nations, referred to today as “Native American” or “American Indian.” Café Cultura’s most well-known event has found a home at the Denver Inner City Parish/La Academia, where we consistently attract 150 to 350 people the second Friday of every month. In fact, we host one of the best open mic venues in the Denver
metropolitan area, and the only space focused on family and youth. We take pride in featuring amazing poets, musicians, and visual artists from the Denver area as well as those from outside the state. CafĂŠ Cultura also conducts highly engaging and culturally relevant spoken word/poetry workshops for underserved youth throughout Colorado. CafĂŠ Cultura partners with select organizations and schools to facilitate an intensive workshop series, publish youth poetry, and organize participant showcases. In an effort to develop young leaders within our community, we also coordinate a youth leadership program for Indigenous youth. If you or your organization is interested in collaborating, feel free to contact us. We hope to see you the 2nd Friday of every month. For more information: info@cafecultura.org; 720-394-6589 www.cafecultura.org; www.facebook.com/cafecultura
Table of Contents Vengo de by Kathya ..............................................................................1 The Brown Fist by Estrella ...................................................................3 Motivated by Nick .................................................................................4 Wallet by Teshawn .................................................................................5 Un Sacrificio, Una Frontera, Un Sue単o by Manuel ..........................6 Who is Life? by Irma .............................................................................8 Independence by Samantha ..................................................................9 Child Soldiers by Isai .......................................................................... 10 Enchiladas by Mika ............................................................................. 11 Peanut Butter by Vince ...................................................................... 12 Roller Coaster by Yasmin .................................................................. 13 Untitled by Aaron ............................................................................... 14 My People by Amir ............................................................................. 15 Challenges by Samantha ..................................................................... 17 Memories by Ezmeralda..................................................................... 18 A Walk in the Park by Kathya ........................................................... 20 Into the Future by Estrella................................................................. 21 Life by Nick ......................................................................................... 22 Life by Teshawn .................................................................................. 24 A Community where... by Irma ........................................................ 25 My Vision by Samantha...................................................................... 26 Paper by Isai ......................................................................................... 27 The Games by Amir ........................................................................... 28
To the Moon by Estrella .................................................................... 30 Three Words by Nick.......................................................................... 31 Silence by Teshawn ............................................................................. 34 Forgiveness by Irma ............................................................................ 35 Ode to My Lamp by Samantha.......................................................... 36 I Am from by Amir ............................................................................. 37 Lie for You? by Irma........................................................................... 39
Vengo de by Kathya I come from pozole, a mixture of maiz, chile, meat, and love. The slight taste of lemon and aguacate makes the day so much better. It reminds me of the tradition we keep. Every drop of the chile juice is a piece of my family’s will and power. The smell makes me feel like I’m back home. Mi mama makes it when there is something to celebrate. Those days are always the best. As was my time in Tijuana, the place of my birth. I know I belong there, with beautiful palm trees and beaches. El olor de comida Mexicana y agua fresca rodea la atmosfera. This is a place where my family congregate and share memories. My family and friends always spend time at each other’s houses. Just thinking of it makes me feel loved with a sense of belonging. Tijuana is a place that I will always love even though I’m so far away. Time adds to this distance, as I remember Alfonso Aguilar, my grandfather. Everyone knew him as a hardworking man who made a living from the sweat of his forehead. He knew a lot. His wise words guided everyone.
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His nine children respected and had honor for him. He is remembered as a strong man who never forgot to keep his word. I would have loved to spend the last days of his life with him. He will always be part of our hearts. So I keep my memories in a necklace, which was passed down for four generations. It is given to the first born in the family. I am extremely honored to receive such a gift because it shows what my family is about. I always carry it for luck. I hope that this necklace will continue to be honored and loved.
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The Brown Fist by Estrella A brown fist, a cultural movement fights for freedom in the land of the free. Women rise from below the hands of a man. The present generation fight for a change they won’t live to see. Their secrets are told through open windows, broken families, and missing fathers. Mothers take the blows, so their small ones don’t have to. Their sons go out to the streets to support their mothers. A change seems inevitable but does not happen due to the fear of the elite. A revolution is near. We just have to embrace it with open arms.
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Motivated by Nick He is up before dawn, running at least a mile. Motivated. Dedicated. Fired up. He heads to school, a straight A student from a D family. He’s here to “break the curse” set on the people of color in this country. The curse is one of not being able to succeed. When I look into his eyes, I see the Mexican boy working hard to make his name. In his eyes, I see who I want to be. I see in myself a successful future, full of love and happiness. I run, but not for me. It’s for my country, family, friends, and girlfriend. I am an Airborne Ranger being made ready to serve when my name is called.
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Wallet by Teshawn They carry the lives of families from all over the world, coming from their grandparents and the people before them. They hold onto the future the old and the young struggling in live to make ends meets. They have the strength and the will to continue in life.
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Un Sacrificio, Una Frontera, Un Sueño by Manuel La raza viene a los estados unidos con un sueño, el sueño de una vida mejor, el sueño de un buen futuro, el sueño Americano. Y somos capaces de cruzar la frontera pa cumplir ese sueño, algo que no es nada fácil. Tenemos que dejar todo atras con el miedo de nunca regresar, para ir a los estados unidos donde la mitad de nosotros no vamos a llegar. Después todavía queda la frontera, donde con el verdadero obstáculo nos vemos a enfrentar Muchos se van a quedar y otros se van a regresar. Solo los que tienen ganas aguantarán de ahí solo los que les quedan fuerzas llegarán. Todavía a enfrentarse con los güeros que no son todos malos. Pero los que si son cajeteros una bola de pendejos. Ellos quieren corrernos, mandarnos de regreso, alejarnos de nuestros sueños, Y quitarnos todo lo que tenemos Por eso son mejor muertos darles un tiro a los pendejos.
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Pero por eso mismo, nos quieren lejos porque nos tienen miedo. Y por esas razones, nuestro sueño nunca se va a cumplir. Y por nuestra culpa, el futuro sufrirá porque no le quedará otra oportunidad. Y con la pistola de su papa las vidas se quitarán. Y nuestro sueño se acabará.
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Who is Life? by Irma Life is a thing, maybe complicated, but strong and worthy. It is always there to catch you when you fall. Life is beautiful, full of wonders that express, cause you to want more. Life is cruel, backstabbing you No, it’s being honest. You asked. It responded. Life is a girl, a girl with many struggles. Four beautiful flowers bloomed. Life is humble, though it might come off as a bit cocky. She is confused by the thought that many people hate, yet don’t understand. Life is my Mom, not having anything, yet making herself be there. She struggles, but everyone does. She won’t give up. She is the meaning of life. I am who I am because of her.
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Independence by Samantha You might have heard growing up, life is so easy by yourself. That’s not me. My father is ill, my mom has been working her whole life, and my family has their issues. I have to live with independence. I am mother to my family. I cook and clean for my mom, as if my life depended on it and get my father’s medication together to keep him alive. I am there to pick up my brother when he’s in need of help. I was placed on this Earth to put others before myself. I am a woman, a mother. I am independence.
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Child Soldiers by Isai Children, who are no longer children, are turned into cruel stone-hearted men wielding guns they can’t even lift. Controlled by fear and shown only one path, they are forced to follow and are ripped from innocence.
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Enchiladas by Mika The house smells like memories, the smell that my parents first encountered when they were together. This sauce is as red and salty as the blood that runs through our veins from generation to generation. Enchiladas are the bond that brings my family together, stronger than any glue.
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Peanut Butter by Vince Power,
control, intelligence, these are the things people want. What happened to green eggs and ham, happiness, equality? No care for broken families but only for those who want to be on top. It’s all just like high school. Everyone wants to be a part of the popular group. Life can be like peanut butter for some. It can be a lot to take down.
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Roller Coaster by Yasmin My life is like a roller coaster. It may be happy and exciting at times. But then a black cloud comes and flips things over, like a strike of lightning. Some may say relax or even chillax. But everybody connects to the feeling of an upside down world under their sleeve. The dizzy feeling of anxiety at the beginning feels like I'm a new born child walking on top of the world. But in the end, whether sad or happy, I could always count on my family.
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Untitled by Aaron As I step into the light, it is my time to prove myself. I have to do what I can do best to impress society. I ride up and down the inclines and ramps, falling and getting cuts. It’s okay though because I get right back up.
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My People by Amir My people, the people they choose to label as lazy. The last I recall, they worked long hours for pay that didn’t allow them to make a living. The sweat from their face signified a need for those couple of cents. The sweat fell onto that brown, dry dirt, the dirt that used the sweat to note just how hard my people worked. There was nothing else for the dirt to get other than sun that woke up every morning after my people. My people, the people who didn’t only work hard for their money but also their freedom. The freedom to be treated equally and no different because of the language they spoke or the color of their skin. And they fought, not by being physical or violent, but by using their words. Their words were still very powerful because once they left their mouths, they would strike like bullets. There were two types of words: the words of encouragement and the word of the truth. One man used those words to encourage his people
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to fight for their rights, changing history by using 3 powerful words: Si se puede! My people are the type of people who are willing to die for what’s right. We may not be rich, but we still have more power and might. So if you still think my people are lazy, just look at their hands. Look at every single cut that field left on my people. Each cut will tell our story. Each cut will prove you wrong. It’s time to give all power to the people.
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Challenges by Samantha Life is challenging. It is filled with hardships and troubles, exemplifying stress. But I will not allow myself to fall. I will push myself to be the best and true.
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Memories by Ezmeralda I am the delicious and warm tamales my grandmother and mom make with meat, masa, chile, and determination, a recipe passed down through generations. The soft outside and chewy inside fills me with energy and warmth. The smell reminds me of love from Mexico and the power that my grandmother shares. I come from a land of sun, on the west coast of the United States. California represents freedom and hope for my family, a place where my grandparents, tios, tias, primas, y primos live. The past resides here, with love and fun; the future filled with hope and wisdom. It is made of love and compassion. I enjoy visiting every summer for the past 8 years. I will always remember Rodolfo Ramirez, who came from the hard and long hours of work in Zacatecas. Tall and dark,
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his rough hands got all of us to where we are now. He represents wisdom for my family, having accomplished raising a wonderful daughter to become my amazing mother. He was the one to always say “si puedes, si sigues tus sueños.” I will never forget my small, gold necklace & bracelet, passed down from my grandfather who passed away two months later. Every time I look at it, my grandfather comes to mind. I don’t use them because they represent loyalty and respect for my grandfather, who is now in a better place. The Quinceañera reminds me of the past 15 years of good childhood memories. A young girl changes from child slippers into woman’s heels and the crown of a princess. It is transfer from a young girl to a grown woman. This representation of a woman’s maturity makes me always feel loyal to my culture.
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A Walk in the Park by Kathya A walk in a park is like accepting all the choices you make in life, one step at a time. You walk around, not minding anyone else’s business. Everything is beautiful and relaxing. The air you breathe isn’t contaminated by all the sickness of the world. Society leads people to believe that we have our whole life to make our dreams become true. When in reality, we don’t. Our dreams fall down like a beaten deer. I want to find the best in life, to become a better person. As I walk the streets of Denver, I find many beautiful flowers staring at me with such curiosity that I can’t find words to explain how I feel. As I approach these flowers, I realize that I’ve been missing out on this beauty. The way that the rose petals sway in the wind and their wonderful appearance makes me want to appreciate the world.
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Into the Future by Estrella Peace not war, love not hate we all know this is our care. But we will not realize it until it’s too late Maybe we’re too young or maybe you’re too old. The air in our lungs is making us bold. We fall down, time and time again, trying to save this town to give ourselves a ten. We raise our fists and stamp our feet to make a change we may never see.
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Life by Nick Baseball, a game played from generation to generation. Up on the plate, I am the aggressor. This is my plate pitcher. Swing, miss, “lower”, “you’re good kid”, “you got this.” The bench cheers me on. A fastball full of hate. I step back out of the batting box. Think about it. Keep your eye on the ball, then swing. I step back into the batting box that is my reality. Ready to come again. The fastball of hate, I see it again. I load and swing all that hate away. I see that ball fly and I take off. I look at my coach, his arm moving in a circular motion. I get to second, ready to run for 3rd. I am more than ½ of the way there. The player bats. I run for third and my coach yells, “Get down!!” I slide
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and I hear “out!” I was almost there and I gave up. I am close now but I can’t give up. I have to wait until I bat again but this time I’ll make it home: my future, my family, my children, a wife, a career, the Army. Swing, miss. Swing, miss. Swing…
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Life by Teshawn Life is like a book, starting a new chapter every day and flipping through pages as you go through your everyday life. You struggle on the difficult words to finish the page, with a different climax for every chapter. We have a hard time reading each page, just to get to the next one and finish the book.
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A Community where... by Irma We live in a community in which whites are heard and everyone else is under and forgotten. In this a generation, men are leaders while women are worth nothing and used. Is that the way things are? Or have they been this way for so long that we believe it’s reality? Women are needed in this world but to men, we are toys, used to become successful. Women are used as puppets, men moving the strings, controlling every movement: sit down, stand up, roll over. It sounds like commands to a dog. So stand together and hold the fists. Representin’ to us is inequality, despite being a generation that swears change.
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My Vision by Samantha My Vision by Samantha I find myself on this windy road through the mountains, I wait for the feeling of success on this long journey, as I reach the beautiful destination . Dodging the rocks make me second guess my faith I must have to face. The fears that I carry in my heart, the self-doubt, and the confusion toward my future creates this windy road. But I know to keep moving forward, this determination will get me to a bigger and better life ahead of me. Then, all of a sudden, I stop with all the bad I faced behind me, and everything good and peaceful ahead. I awake from this indescribable dream.
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Paper by Isai Life is like a piece of paper, plain and simple, but it is what you do with this piece of paper that defines you. It can be decorated with beauty or folded into complex creatures. Maturity and dedication can come from crayons, pens, and pencils. It can soar high as a plane or be sold for the highest bidder. Life is not what you were born into, but rather what you create with it.
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The Games by Amir I find myself in the Hunger Games, doing anything to survive. Pulling back, then letting go, I watch that sharp, pointy arrow go clean through my obstacles. I’m running from place to place, aware that it’s either me or them. I’m desperate for help but have trouble trusting others. At first, they’re useful. But then, they let the prize of living their life take over. This causes the contestants to pray for a magical clover, doing anything to find luck, as they seem to be stuck giving the power pleasure, making the people weaker. The games put us in fear and keep the people tame. It drives the people insane and the government is the one to blame. The games make you bring down your peers just to succeed. If you get shot, they will just sit there and watch you bleed. The games include the generation that talks about Martin Luther King’s I Have a Dream
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and about walking hand in hand, yet we kill for a brand. These games are like Sour Patch Kids. At first, they are sour, but for some apparent reason, they choose not to be sweet. It starts off by giving a quick greeting, then says “come on your blind date with death and tell me how it goes.” You see it’s just the game they play, but let me just say, there is always a Mocking Jay holding up the three fingers, the three fingers that are the only type of hope that the people have.
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To the Moon by Estrella Take me to the moon and the stars across the universe and to the skies to a place far, far away, somewhere we can call home. Let me see the beauty beyond those eyelashes of yours, deep down in your soul. I want to see what we can discover. Take me to the moon, to the place you call home.
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Three Words by Nick I love you, words I never heard from the mouth of my mother. This coming from my girlfriend, offering words of comfort my mother never gave. I know that there is no other girl but her, because brother she is the light of my life. I know this is really cliché, but I say the real stuff you’re afraid to say and I get hated on for saying it. She's like a second mother, or wait, that would be kind of awkward, like a sister. That's awkward too. Well, let's put it this way. She’s my motivation, dedication, and drive for who I wish to be. She gives me advice that my mother never would. I love her, and she's the biggest part of my life. Tu eres mi chaparrita, mi princessa y la mujer mas bella que yo conozco.
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Mi amor, tu eres mi vida. Si supieras cuanto te amo. We may have our "struggles," especially when we're texting. No one is going to get that joke but you. When I'm with you, there's a sense of security that I've never had before. I can't explain it. The love my mother didn't give I get from my girlfriend, Alma. For three months, I was ignorant, Stupid, and in love. I'm not going to stand here and lie. I honestly loved you, and continue doing so. You are everything I want but no longer what I need. Three words we said and those words are said too much, but not enough. But I'm not here to dis on my mother. And yes she's never told me she loves me, but she shows me every day. She tells me those three words are said too much, yet not enough.
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Obviously, most of this poem was written while we were together. This has opened my eyes. The "tiger" inside me has now awakened. And you're going to miss what you had. ;) I know I will at times.
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Silence by Teshawn Silence, the best sound in the world, but others disagree. They say silence holds people back, but the truth is it doesn’t. Silence makes the strong stronger. It carries the life of the most powerful people. It holds secrets and never lets them go. Silence: it allows you to think, so when you do break that silence, you’re powerful.
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Forgiveness by Irma I know I can forgive you one day. I just really don’t know when. How could you look at us and say we’re nothing about family? Representin’ to you is getting locked up. You talk about riding for the hood no more. Betrayal sucks. Dealing and parties is the life for you. I never really understood you. You claim to ride for us. But when the truth comes out, you’re stealing, being chased. Once you came to our house, we opened the doors when no one else would. How could you introduce drugs to us as if they were no harm? On the run for years, hiding in our house, yet we’re nothing about loyalty? I know I can forgive you one day. I just really don’t know when.
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Ode to My Lamp by Samantha Jonathon Parker got me a lamp, which he made himself with his blood aching hands. It carries a light as bright as the sun. I switched on the light, as if it was the way to keep the monsters away with magical powers. With this carved light brown lamp, my room was lit as the night sky. Two brown bears, dirt brown, were carved in by one sharp knife: four fierce claws, two pairs of razor sharp teeth. My heart was fulfilled this way, by the sacred lamp. It was the most peaceful, protective light I ever had. It was mine once. Now it is starting its new chapter.
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I Am from by Amir “I Am From…” by Amir I am from the tiny court that brought hope from the streets and my struggle. I am from the tree out front where the chapter of my long book begins, from the house filled with the smell of pain and the sweat of hard work. I am from the small, colorful, beautiful garden my grandmother created, whose long gone limbs I remember as if they were my own. I’m from working hard and man pride, from my mother’s wound and my grandmother’s support . I’m from getting together and watching those games we bet on but could never afford and from communicating. I’m from those stories that kept me going and the stories that kept me up a at night, from knowing that the lazy works double. I’m from Cinco de Mayo, eating tamales and enchiladas. I’m from where blue and orange is our pride and joy, from a place where my Mexican stepdad is not allowed because of where he comes from.
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I am from of a long lasting generation of the Sarmientos and the Silerios. I’m from my dad’s success and my mom’s struggle. I’m from my mom’s tears that fell down her face when she got laid off. I’m from the life that taught me to be a man at an early age to support my mother. I am from a lost generation that struggles with wars and disagreements, from planes getting lost to people starving. I’m from a place where sharing is not allowed and everything is done for yourself. I’m from facebook to twitter, and a little instagram because who needs to talk in person when you can stand next to someone and send them a text. I am from a place where the kids are something else. I am from the first couple chapters of long lasting book I am from that court filled with hope, from my mother’s wound and my grandmothers support.
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Lie for You? by Irma Lie for you? By Irma All rise. His eyes stared back at me. Tears roll down her eyes. Rape, they say, you’re being accused of this crime. You tell me you’re innocent, swearing up and down that she’s lying. How she was drunk? How not? You were drunk. You put it on your kids, asking me to lie for you. There is no love for you, no respect, nor trust. Right hand on the book I’m going to lie for you? But to me, you’re invisible, shedding helpless tears that will never mean anything to you. Guilt is a lie and innocence is a virtue. Rape, they say. How not?
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