College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3) Cafe Cultura Community Speaks Project #9 Xpress Yourself Workshop Participants
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3) Copyright Š 2013 by Xpress Yourself Workshop Participants All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the author.
To the students at College Track who show their determination and perseverance in reaching their goals‌
Acknowledgments Thank you to the staff at College Track for allowing us the opportunity to work with your students in expressing themselves. Thank you to all Xpress Yourself workshop participants for offering your time, words, and energy in making our time together a success. Keep writing and telling your stories! “It’s our responsibility and choice to express ourselves and lift our voice, together building unity, leaders in our community. This is how we tell our stooorrrryyyy!
Foreword The third book in College Track’s series, this collection of poetry provides a space for these high school youth to present their stories, offering critical insight into how they see the world. We hope you enjoy the poems presented here and use them as examples of how you too can express yourself and tell your own story. For those who do not know about organization: Café Cultura is an award-winning arts, culture, and youth development organization in Denver that promotes unity and healing among Indigenous peoples through creative expression while empowering youth to find their voice, reclaim oral and written traditions, and become leaders in their communities. Café Cultura has been providing positive, creative, and engaging community spaces for the Denver metropolitan area for more than nine years. The idea for our organization emerged during the summer of 2004 with the passing of respected elder and veteran poet Abelardo “Lalo” Delgado. At that moment, we realized and accepted our responsibility to continue using our oral and written traditions to provide opportunities for creative expression not offered in schools or in the larger community. Café Cultura also drew inspiration from the movements connecting Indigenous people from throughout the Americas. In that spirit of Red/Brown Unity, we hoped to use creative expression to unify people representing southern Indigenous nations, known by terms such as “Chicana/o,” “Mexicana/o,” and “Latina/o,” with those Natives of northern nations, referred to today as “Native American” or “American Indian.” Café Cultura’s most well-known event has found a home at the Denver Inner City Parish/La Academia, where we consistently attract 150 to 350 people the second Friday of every month. In fact, we host one of the best open mic venues in the Denver
metropolitan area, and the only space focused on family and youth. We take pride in featuring amazing poets, musicians, and visual artists from the Denver area as well as those from outside the state. In addition to our monthly open mic, CafĂŠ Cultura Collective members perform poetry at schools and community functions as well as conduct spoken word and hip hop workshops for youth. We partner with select organizations and schools to facilitate intensive workshops, publish youth poetry, showcase participants at community events, and develop young leaders. If you or your organization is interested in collaborating, feel free to contact us. We hope to see you the 2nd Friday of every month. For more information: info@cafecultura.org; 720-394-6589 www.cafecultura.org; www.facebook.com/cafecultura
Table of Contents I Am by Sara ...........................................................................................1 I Am the One by Vaniesha ...................................................................3 3 Pairs by Leonel ....................................................................................5 Weight Lifter by Shayla .........................................................................6 I Ride by Sara ..........................................................................................7 The Bullied by Vaniesha........................................................................9 Exception to the Rule by Leonel ...................................................... 10 Humility by Sara .................................................................................. 11 Ms. V's Mixtape by Vaniesha ............................................................ 13 I Am by Shayla..................................................................................... 16 My Black is Beautiful by Vaniesha.................................................... 17
I Am by Sara I am a girl, the daughter of the mother land, one who hears the cries of the land trying to extend my arms out to her but not enough to reach. Yet I keep extending. I am the tear she sheds in loving memory of those she loses everyday I am I am the rich smell of buna she craves every moment of each day. I am the gebs and sinday grinded by your beloved grandmothers to the shinrukt that stick to your clothes, never wanting to let go. I am I am Haile Gebre Silase, king of kingdoms, who was wise and clever. I am from the army who fought with spears, showing the enemy who is really in charge. Marching with pride, I continue to believe. I am from a long line of kings and queens I am I am my mother’s jebena yenate jebena kegowa yemiweta crafted so neatly with a timeline of history. I am I am the strong Habesha women
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carrying the insira. I am the sweat that drips down her face to the thirst, tempting her to stop. I am the modest, yet beautiful Habesha women smiling at me, knowing the struggles she is about to face. I am the dedication she brings forth each day and she continues to pray. I am Sara Dessie
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3)
I Am the One by Vaniesha I am being judged, some judgments come from my peers or people I don’t even know, some from the LORD ALMIGHTY, and the rest from me. I am my own worst critic. I push myself too much and too far, knowing that my physical capabilities are now limited. I’m still used to the old me: the one who got A’s and B’s, played every sport and still managed to stay on top of everything; the one who always had a smile on her face and exceeded what was expected. I have not yet accepted what has happened to me, though it’s been 10 ½ years. I put myself down when I don’t meet my goals. But I’m past the stage now, and I’m proud of myself. Yeah, I’m human, so I’m still going to judge myself because I’m all about self-discipline. I am my own big bad wolf as well as my own bricks, my own natural disasters as well as the survivors. I am the fire that burns and destroys, as well as the water to put it out, my own illness but my own cure.
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I am my own follower searching for the leader, but then I realized that I AM my leader.
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3)
3 Pairs by Leonel 3 pairs of glasses three pairs of shades three pairs of other things are all there in space. 3 pairs of shoeless feet dream mindless thoughts, three pairs of wishes for all that you are….. All I want for you is happiness. All I have to give is nothing less than one or two more. That means where you are is where you’re at. If your head is cold, put on a hat. If you can’t recall, just remember that to win three pairs of shades.
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Weight Lifter by Shayla Feelings hurt, self-esteem put down. “She’s not that good of a dancer,” they say under their breath. The whispers of people become weights on my back: 10 pounds, 20 pounds. We’re all the same people. So tell me, when did we get so fearful? Self-image versus peer-image; how other people see you versus how you view yourself; These conflicting thoughts stumble across my feet as I turn across the floor. But I still deliver a perfect pirouette turn. In the language of dance, I will speak my voice and let it be heard, as I take these weights off of my back, pound by pound. Brick by brick, I will dance my way up the mountain of success, pushing, striving, working to succeed. If I know I can, I will. Feelings no longer suffer, self-esteem on the rise. Dance is the hidden voice of the soul. My soul? Well, my soul speaks loudly.
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3)
I Ride by Sara I ride on this highway and I go, just looking ahead, trying to forget the rest. My heart speaks to me clearly and I speak and speak only to hear the uttermost indulgence of silence. I ride on this road, feeling like the whole world has been stuffed into my car, Yet I feel alone, all alone in my thoughts, not able to express this pain. I scream so loudly and yet no one hears the screams that lie from within. I draw a line that separates, me. Is that why I feel so lonely? The world tells me where to go, but I continue to stay lost, not able to comprehend both sides of me split. I keep on passing, passing the exit. I keep on driving. I look only to see directions to life mapped so perfectly. Now I drive and continue to try to find the way,
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the way that I want to follow so I ride.
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3)
The Bullied by Vaniesha I look at my bruises every day and I smile. I’ve ran the trail of life for what seems to be miles, been pushed down, bruised, spat on, and cut up. But I pulled myself up by the bootstraps and kept my head up. Keep going baby girl because the only competition you need to worry about is the reflection you gaze at in the mirror. And one day you will show the world who you really are and who you’ll truly be, because the journey is not over, not ‘til God says, “it’s time to come home to be with me.”
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Exception to the Rule by Leonel Soft Clouds all drift away and bright sunshine never stays. Warm afternoons turn rainy, dark, and cruel. A candle’s glowing light will die. The purest voices often lie and with love, I’ve found that all the same is true. Even though I should know better, I guess we can maybe try there. Is the risk of looking like a fool? But I got a living feeling just, hush don’t ask me why. You might be an exception to the rule.
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3)
Humility by Sara Humility is a word foreign to this generation. My friends, let me start by saying, a woman’s beauty does not come from the tightness of her clothes and the sheerness of her shirt. Her beauty comes from the thing that is hidden, hidden so deep that the only people to see the beauty are those who look past what lay on the surface, and search the depth of her soul. A woman once said to me, the beauty of a woman grows as her education grows. Women, we can't blame each other. We live in this conformed society. As women, we are always on this subway, crammed and stuffed with ideas of how we should be and must be. We are consistently on this train, speeding and moving in life, being told how to act, what to do, and what to say What is the speed limit? Where does the train stop? Does it really ever stop?
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Do we wait ‘til the engine runs out of fuel and no longer needs us? Women, let me tell you this: “whoso be a [wo]man must be a nonconformist.” We must look at the beauty from within and be proud of the woman that we have become. The woman who understands her true beauty is a women who knows where the train stops and where to continue walking. My mom is that woman.
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Ms. V's Mixtape by Vaniesha Wale told me that I was the illest chick alive. Drake told me to own it, it’s mine. The Weeknd told me that I’ve never felt this pretty and he’s right, I never did. These haters are too slow and they be sleepin’ on me. Get off, I’m not your pajamas kid. Drake made it clear that I’m the furthest thing from perfect and so is everybody else, but you can be perfect 10 you if you learn to love yourself. They aren’t ready. I’m like KL’s poetic justice, I’m in LOVE with the young woman I’ve become, there’s no need to adjust it. Michael Jackson taught me that if I want to solve a worldwide problem, that it starts with the Man in the Mirror. So I took out my Windex and paper towels, sprayed it down, made life much clearer. 2 Chainz said that it’s ok to be different, Hell, I’m just not what they expected. J. Cole let me know that I don’t need braces for my crooked smile, because my imperfectly perfect natural beauty is going to unpack her bags and stay for a while.
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Whitney Houston told me that I can’t love others if I don’t have love within myself, Greatest Love of All, and she’s right. A relationship won’t last without a foundation, it’ll simply just fall. Mariah Carey and Miguel told me I was beautiful. I smile and say, “that’s just what I needed to know.” King Chip told me it’s all about them Euros and Pounds, I’m going to use the words my haters threw at me to become better than American made from scratch straight up out the ground. Lyfe Jennings taught me the definition of ride or die. Must be nice keeping your loved ones by your side, not holding grudges and just enjoying life. Better than Beyoncé’s doctor, makin’ them feel better, schoolin’ life, going with the flow not stressing everything is alright, Big Krit told me life is a road and you can’t be hitting them potholes. Me and my old school, so just let them people talk, laugh, and say cool, KL said you can’t kill one’s vibe if they’re full of life, hanging in the halls too long Killa Kyleon turned me into the class clown and damn, I forgot my books. Wound up coming in late and still managed to school you fools like Lamar Kendrick. So now I’m gone with Nicki Manaj and Ciara, I’m out, I don’t have time for y’all’s games.
College Track Speaks! (Vol. 3)
I have a mark to leave in this world, no doubt.
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I Am by Shayla “The only journey is the one within.” I am optimistic. I am open-minded. I am kind. I am me. “Dance. It enables you to feel yourself, and lose yourself at the same time.” I love to feel the music through my feet. I am positive. There have been struggles in my life that have stopped me from getting exactly where I want at this time in my life, but I continue to keep pushing through. Challenges are a way to success. I am vibrant. I am risky. I’ve never been the type to wear my heart on my sleeve, but that’s just me.
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My Black is Beautiful by Vaniesha I remember when I was younger, I wished to be white with the long straight blonde hair and eyes that reflected varying shades of blue from the ocean to the sky. Growing up, I got put down for how I looked. My hair was too curly and my complexion too dark. I didn’t understand, what was I supposed to look like? Then, I recalled from the poem “Why God made us Black” and in God’s reply on the that very last line, “I didn’t make you in the image of darkness. I made you in the image of me.” So I stopped wishing. I started embracing my skin, the color of fertile soil that grows crops to feed to people, smooth like a Hershey’s kiss. My dark brown eyes reflect back my strength and confidence, yet shine bright like diamonds. And my hair is like the wool of sheep, so soft and curly, they bounce like the springs in a mattress. Honestly, I love it because my skin and hair are beautiful. My black is beautiful, you know what scratch that, I’m beautiful.