Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2 Cafe Cultura Community Speaks Project 21 Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants (ages 15-18)
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2 Copyright Š 2015 by Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants (ages 15-18) All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the author.
To the resilient CLA students in Ms. Gibson’s class…You have the power to be amazing! Continue believing… #CafeCultura #XpressYourself #TellingOurStories
Acknowledgments Thank you to the staff of Contemporary Learning Academy for providing us the opportunity to work with your students during our Telling Our Stories workshop series. Special shout out to all participants for opening up and speaking your mind. Remember: “It’s our responsibility and choice to express ourselves and lift our voice, together building unity, leaders in our community. This is how we tell our stooorrrryyyy!”
Foreword Now in our second year working with Contemporary Learning Academy, we have enjoyed our time building relationships with both CLA students and staff. This year, we had the honor of working with periods 1 and 3 of Ms. Gibson’s World Literature 2 course. The youth-written spoken word/poetry presented here reminds us of how we can all push through difficult times and emerge as powerful people with a sense of pride, hope, and determination. These high school students also show us the importance of expressing ourselves and telling our stories, as nobody will speak for us. For those who do not know about our organization: Café Cultura is an award-winning arts, culture, and youth development organization in Denver that promotes unity and healing among Indigenous peoples through creative expression while empowering youth to find their voice, reclaim oral and written traditions, and become leaders in their communities. Café Cultura has been providing positive, creative, and engaging community spaces for the Denver metropolitan area for more than ten years. After the passing of respected elder and veteran poet Abelardo “Lalo” Delgado, we accepted responsibility to continue using our oral and written traditions to provide opportunities for creative expression often not offered in schools or in the larger community. Café Cultura also drew inspiration from the movement connecting Indigenous people from throughout the Americas. We use creative expression to unify people representing southern Indigenous nations, known by terms such as “Chicina/o” and “Latina/o,” with those Natives of northern nations, referred to as “American Indian” or “Native American.” Café Cultura hosts one of the best open mic venues in the Denver metropolitan area, and the only space focused on family and youth. We also conduct highly engaging and culturally relevant
spoken word/poetry workshops for underserved youth throughout Colorado. CafĂŠ Cultura partners with select organizations and schools to facilitate an intensive workshop series, publish youth poetry, and organize participant showcases. In an effort to develop young leaders within our community, we also coordinate a youth leadership program for Indigenous youth. If you or your organization is interested in collaborating, feel free to contact us. For more information about our open mic events, workshops, youth leadership program, and other programs: info@cafecultura.org 720-394-6589 www.cafecultura.org www.facebook.com/cafecultura
Table of Contents Finding Love by Rebecca ........................................................................ 1 The Life of a King by Kirk ..................................................................... 2 Mind by Aleeya ........................................................................................ 3 Mama by Sky............................................................................................ 4 Cancer Patient by Shelby ........................................................................ 5 A Maze by Angel ..................................................................................... 6 Mi Pueblo by Ana .................................................................................... 7 Peace Outside? by Amy .......................................................................... 8 Standing Tall by Nelson .......................................................................... 9 I Will Always Remember by Dia .......................................................... 10 All Around Me by Josh ......................................................................... 10 Battlefield by Alex ................................................................................. 12 If You Existed or Not by Aaliyah ........................................................ 13 Life by Cody........................................................................................... 14 Dear Self by Maurice ............................................................................. 15 Make This a Better Community by Angel ........................................... 16 My Channel by Matthew ....................................................................... 16 My Best Friend by Hazani .................................................................... 17 Us by Anonymous ................................................................................. 17 A Hood With No Violence? by Manuel .............................................. 19 Invisible by Danica ................................................................................ 20 Special Young Man by Keir .................................................................. 21 Now That You Are Gone by Alyssa .................................................... 22 Life by Tavion........................................................................................ 24
The Beast by Kyle ................................................................................. 25 The Boxer by Eric................................................................................. 27 The Puzzle of Life by Rebecca ............................................................ 28 The Rhythm of Life by Kirk ................................................................ 29 Her by Aleeya ........................................................................................ 30 The Heart of My Ancestors by Sky ..................................................... 31 Bruises and Scars by Shelby ................................................................. 32 Mexico by Angel ................................................................................... 33 Scoring the Point by Amy .................................................................... 33 Stranger by Nelson ............................................................................... 35 Love by Dia ........................................................................................... 35 Just Do It by Josh ................................................................................. 36 Get Up by Alex ..................................................................................... 37 I Need Cheese! by Aleeya..................................................................... 37 White Flag by Aaliyah ........................................................................... 38 Change by Cody .................................................................................... 39 Mexican Fam by Angel ......................................................................... 39 McCoy Family by Maurice ................................................................... 40 I Am Not Alone by Anonymous ......................................................... 41 Who Am I? by Matthew ....................................................................... 42 Regret by Rebecca ................................................................................. 42 Last Whistle by Shelby.......................................................................... 43 Grandma by Dia ................................................................................... 43 Mirror by Josh ....................................................................................... 44 In Need by Rebecca .............................................................................. 45 I Do Not Want to Die by Dia ............................................................. 45
Finding Love by Rebecca You start to think, if they saw through your eyes, they would be able to see all your scars that you have deep down inside. Soon you wish that you could not feel, that you did not have feelings. Then you will become numb. But you will feel everything at the same time. You will grow exhausted everyday and become obsessed with finding someone that loves you because you can’t love yourself. That is pain and it demands to be left. You will always feel confused, unsatisfied, vulnerable, lost, unimportant, anxious, and broken. You will not need water to feel like you are drowning. But you need to forget it all, wake up in the morning thanking God for another day of life. Walk out your door. Look at the beautiful birds chirping, waterfalls flowing, and trees singing. Think about it. You cannot change yesterday. You have to live today and plan tomorrow.
2
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
The Life of a King by Kirk It is clear to me now. Yellow like the sun, they help me see the darkness in my “friends” and protect my eyes from the crazy winds. Without them, I would be lost like a loose leaf blowing to no end. In reality though, I am all types of greatness wrapped into one, topped with chile like the weight of my family’s oath on my shoulders. Burritos are like the kings of food, so I guess I am the burrito of my family. We stay strong, so much strength that it sometimes turns into pain. A kind heart, smart, funny and all, the only time he is happy occurs when he dribbles a ball. That is my brother. For us, a diploma is more than just a piece of paper. It holds so much happiness for my mother. She wants to see me achieve this more than ever,
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
seeing that she never got to witness my sister do it because of her young death. She died when she was only 5, but I like to think she graduated in the sky. They push me forward as I live my life as a king.
Mind by Aleeya I have got this gold watch on my wrist, a couple goals for my bucket list. I stay cool, calm, and collected never let my thoughts get neglected. I give my mind a lot of attention so my thoughts are what I am representing. You can say it is a fact but that does not mean it is a fact. I base things on my own judgement and opinion and that is that. This Gemini girl can build or destroy everything if you let me in your world. So be good to me and I will be good to you. Do not scrutinize me and I will not scrutinize you. I put this gold chain on my neck so go ahead and try to reflect.
3
4
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Mama by Sky Mama, you are the love in my heart, burning beneath the pores of my body. You have strength that never stops rising like the rocky mountains. Your love is the Nile river, flowing in various ways. Your flawless skin, sandy brown, is beautiful like the pyramids in Cairo. Your pride, your commitment, your love embraces me. Your child-like arms holding, grabbing my child-like arms.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Cancer Patient by Shelby I will always remember the bright light Illuminating from your soul, so passionate, so proud. The wind whips our hair and fishing lines while our skin bumps from the early mountain air. You are not remembered as a cancer patient, but as the star who made me smile. Your strength pushes me to keep pursuing my dreams when I want to give up and cry. What I do, I do is for you.
5
6
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
A Maze by Angel I stand at the starting point next to my family. We enter the dangerous place, walls surrounding my space. My parents lead the way, hoping I go the right way and not make their same mistakes. As time passes and we try to find the way, we all get older, some pass away. I realize it is up to me to find the right path. I notice that I, myself, have made mistakes. However, I realize that messing up in life is not a bad thing. You learn and move on reaching for a better place.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Mi Pueblo by Ana Mi pueblo hermoso is not made out of money, but out of pride. My mom experienced miseries there, but made a lot of memories. Through her struggles, she kept her head up high, trying to give us everything she never had. El olor de menudo filled my grandma’s house on Sundays, mis tios pisteando y mis tĂas chismeando. El sabor del amor de la abuelita and her effort was what really mattered. It all came down to a good family. I look down at my necklace that makes me stronger, appreciating my family’s struggles. We work and work to make a dream come true. Every generation has had one and I am part of it. I am glad I have the family I have.
7
8
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Peace Outside? by Amy How can we find peace in a world that is turning into a war? People get killed over colors. I cannot wear red or blue because I could be next. Crips, Bloods, ESO killing each other for “fun,” “revenge.” They try to take over the “hood,” bodies lying on the ground. Police are blinded, trying to solve the case. Police knock on doors, giving them the news that their son, daughter, or husband, will not see tomorrow. No one has control of anyone else’s action. We say we live in the land of the free when we are not safe to walk the streets. If I was to uncover your kids’, sisters’, and brothers’ eyes, would you show them that you are the reason why they cannot play outside without anyone getting shot?
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Standing Tall by Nelson My head feels empty, but I know that it is not. I just quit all drug habits so I would not have to drop hot to the lady who thought she ruled me because the object on my ankle. Sometimes my head fills with ideas, one told me to shank you. But I reject the bad thoughts so I do not end up in shackles. Just because I am a JR, doesn’t mean me and my dad are the same dude. But I am not. When I was little, him not being there would get to me. I prayed every night to God, please do not give him shit to eat. I used to show no sympathy, only for my mom because my whole life, she was the one who put the green in my palms. Even though she had six kids, she made it on her own, working from 8 to 5, so she would barely be home. So I learned from my brothers, they taught me sort of good. They also told me, become something so we can make it out of the hood. I have not made it yet, but my hopes are standing tall,
9
10
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
just a kid hoping to make it, but yes, life is a brawl. Sometimes it will knock you down but do not give up, you will get through it all.
I Will Always Remember by Dia I will always remember the beatings that bruised my body, the words to keep me down. You wanted to see me fall. and never get off the ground, but I will continuing standing tall.
All Around Me by Josh I carry my dad’s passion in a way I will never forget. I am confidence, a part of my dad’s side I carry with me. Our bravery is used like no other culture, eating with our bare hands. I come from a place you never heard of. The empty roads left me hopeless, nothing but dirt floating around, feeling dirty. Feeding off these animals is the cultural way,
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
always remembering that beautiful place that carries the waterfall like magic. I come from Ethiopia, a place like home, a place different from the US. As I am back in Denver, surrounded by the tunes playing as our world revolves. I am music, my money, motivation. I come from the tunes that lead you to my unknown genre. Music is life and my life is musical. Follow the rhythm to my lyrics, as my heart pounds like a terrifying beat. Turn me up and have a little faith. Music is my success when I feel like a failure. Music is the song of my life.
11
12
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Battlefield by Alex Life is a battlefield. People run around, frantically screaming and doing everything, as if anyone actually cares. "Reloading!" "Firing!" "Binge-watching 3 seasons of 'Orange is the New Black' on Netflix!". Nobody is really paying attention to what anyone else is doing. They have their own trenches to push out of. They have their own things to shout out. When there are so many little problems whizzing past your head, so many bullets targeted specifically to take you down, you have to stay strong. Keep moving forward! You might have to duck your head to get away from debris or a tank shell crashing into the earth near you. But wars are won by the people living. Life is won by the people who keep trying. Some of your friends might take the wrong path and get clipped, but you cannot let them hold you back. This is your survival. This is your life. Finish high school. Go to college. Take that airfield.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
If You Existed or Not by Aaliyah “I will be a better father, oh I will. I have been clean and thinking deep. Let me start to explain how sorry I really feel. When I am out, things will be different.� There is no need to pretend, out and free, like a summer breeze. He tiptoes around parenthood, a father that only exists when he sits in an empty room alone with a pen and paper. When those four walls are your only friend, you feel cold and alone. I carry on your name with a smile like yours makes a monster out of me. Oh man, the horror. With all the awards I won, I never heard a clap, trying to make you proud, proud to be MY dad. Regardless if I am weak or strong, you may see me struggle, but never will you see me fall. Parent or not, you missed it all. Watch me soar high, I am standing tall.
13
14
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Life by Cody Tick Tock, Tick Tock Life is counting down on your internal clock. Memories, which seem as if they occurred yesterday, turn to flashes of moments fading away. People you once knew walk by without a clue. The times you once shared exist as if you were never there. Years fly, friends die, and you never know when you will say your last goodbye. Oh, how I wish I could turn back time, spend it with loved ones, and cherish what was once mine. Or to go back even more, to being a kid in a candy store. How I miss the way I used to feel on Christmas day when Santa was real. But I return back to reality, back to today. Family is scarce and memories continue to fade away.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Dear Self by Maurice Dear Maurice Sr, You remember the long days of school, sitting, listening to teachers just stand up in the front of the classroom. Their words usually went in and out of your ears, not really caring what anyone had to say. All you wanted to do was play with friends and not listen. It was not just you all of the time. There would be others playing around too. But since I am on a better path to graduate, I want my child to do the same. I want him not to be like his father was in school because when you participate, you have more fun. The teachers also appreciate you in their class. The key to keep him from being like me is talk to him, tell him what the future is about.
15
16
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Make This a Better Community by Angel In every community, there should be people giving back. It does not matter what race you are, just give back. Yo, teach a kid to read. Yo, feed someone who is hungry. Yo, listen to one another. Yo, be respectful. Yo, stop doing drugs. Yo, stop the beef. In our community, we should all get together to help make this a better place.
My Channel by Matthew Life is like a remote, because things you do in life are based on your decisions. What you choose is going to lead to your success. Other buttons can try to control you, but just ignore them to reach your goal. I stay focused on choosing the right channel for my life. Other interesting channels try to distract me from my goals. In this channel, I see me supporting my family and myself.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
My Best Friend by Hazani I see her as a leader who she does not sugar coat anything, She is the type to cuss me out, then 3 minutes later, tell me, “Remember, I love you with all my heart.” She is a leader in my community, because she always tries to give me the best advice, on anything I come to her about. She always encourages me to do my best with anything I do, from what I eat to my future careers. Even though she might be 100% wrong for accusing me of something, she is still my grandma and my best friend. I love her dearly.
Us by Anonymous “What do you want from me?” Her hazel eyes stared into mine. She says nothing, mumbling a few things. “I don’t understand. Please.” Her eyes turn darker, harder. Her hands ball into fists. “Just, please help me understand.” She looks so angry and the words just start pouring out.
17
18
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
“You’re nothing. What don’t you understand? It should be easy. You are fat, ugly, worthless. You are nothing.” She lets out a sinister laugh and continues, “Did you really think someone would love you? Everybody leaves you for a reason. You’re noth-” I did not even realize what I had done until the blood ran down my arm. Looking down at the floor and seeing a broken mirror, I started to cry. I was becoming free. Our face was broken but my spirit was not. What I used to be like, what I used to feel was evil. When I used to look into the mirror, all my flaws would be pointed out to me. Now that I am trying to empower myself, I realize how hard everything is, how hard life is. I am getting better, learning, loving. I am relearning everything and this is just the beginning.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
A Hood With No Violence? by Manuel How can we find peace over in the East when these young boys keep shooting at each other over beef!? The statistics say you will be in jail or deceased by the time you hit 18. The sad thing is, these shooters do not have feelings. They could care less if your mom is kneeling, praying to the ceiling. These shooters love black hoodies, black pants, and black J’s. Why is everything black? Well, because they do not have feelings! They catch a body and disappear, so now there are two people missing, one all laughing and kidding while the other one is not breathing. Families try their hardest to find the killer. But the case stays cold like the Pittsburgh Steelers in the winter! These young boys will keep on killing. These mothers will keep on wishing. Hopefully I do not catch anything like a blind man fishing. In reality, some would say a hood with no violence is just a vision. Everyday God wonders why these boys are ending life missions.
19
20
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Invisible by Danica “Hey.” They turn around but they do not see me “I got A in class.” “Cool?’’ I speak but they do not seem to care what comes out of my mouth. Am I invisible? I cry, “Help!’’ “Get over it.” I try but I cannot pick up the broken pieces. “I cannot do this anymore.” “Stop feeling bad for yourself.” The shadows of my existence disappeared in the wind. “Why can’t they hear me?” Do you they even notice I am gone? All I want is that love, that kind of attention that wipes all the pain and heartache away. I walk in front of them but they seem to look through me. I am tired of being invisible. “Why!?” I scream on top of my lungs. They see me.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Special Young Man by Keir My cousin Daeruis was a special young man who worked hard and would not get angry or take it too far. He always woke up to a new day happy or excited because he had things going and flowing. That would always keep him going. He danced for everyone who wanted some moves thrown at them. He rapped so good that you would want to start rapping back. My cousin would break his back helping and giving.
21
22
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Now That You Are Gone by Alyssa I still remember but day by day, the pain I feel slowly starts to fade away. It was not too long ago but it feels like forever. The day you left me was the worst day ever. I remember the laughs and all the fun we use to have. You left me too early. I miss you so much dad. You were not always around but when you were, it was great. I always wonder what it would be like if you were with me today. I remember the good but also the bad. Sometimes when I would see you, you would just be mad, mad at the world and I did not know why. Remembering what you did makes me want to cry because now if you could see, my brother is heading down the same path. Sometimes I wonder if you were here, would he be better? Would he change his ways? Would he have chosen a better life cause I know the path he going down is not right.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
I know one day he will pick himself up and see what he can be. He has all the potential anyone could see. It was hard on all of us but we are doing just fine, even though no one thought it. There was a silver line. My brother never really got over the fact that you are gone, but me, I have learned to live with it. I am doing fine. I could not stay stuck in the past. I had to move on, make my life better, chose a better path, go to school, get a job, learn to live, and always laugh. Even though people do not think it can get better, trust me it does. it just takes time, even if not right away, you will see the silver line.
23
24
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Life by Tavion I come from a place where mothers are crying, youngins are dying, and bullets are flying. People stay heartless over colors, over their own brother, when everyone is in the struggle. I’m just a youngin on a mission, grew up watching old heads in the kitchen and they weren’t cooking. They were whippin’, trying to make a living. Growing up, I watched all of my friends shake, even my family members treated me like an inmate. Mama had me at 16 and I’m from a small city. But I have some big dreams. Daddy left me as a youngin, jail was his location, so I had no motivation. But I was still dedicated. Nobody can stop my shine. I’m like the sun, number one. Mama smiles just to see what I’ve become. I’m just a young man with a big dream, trying make it out of the projects rich. So I need to stay on my paper route. People don’t want me to make it, really trying to take me out. So I pray daily, asking God for the safer route.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
The Beast by Kyle You can always hear it, slithering behind the world. You hear the beast, always. It screams at you, laughs with you, mocks you, cries for you. An instrument is a living thing, an animal with its own intentions. If you want the beast to be quiet, you must tame the beast and make it sing. Soothe the beast. Praise the beast. Fight the beast. Conquer the beast. Look down the street. Hear the great instruments synchronize? Hear the voices singing, pleading with you to be the doorway, to open the window? It is asking you to plug the world into its own universal PA system and drown everything in music. Unleash the beast! Life is a song, a song writing itself. You are a vessel for the sound.
25
26
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
The proper notes are hiding deep inside you. Reach into your soul. Grab hold of the sound! Push it out. Tame the snake. Do not be afraid. The poison only makes you stronger. Dance your fingers on its neck. Make it sing life. Make it squel. Make it shiver and shake. Let your powerful sound linger for a moment. Bask in its beauty. Life is a song, your song Play it hard. Play it true. And you will realize, the beast is you.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
The Boxer by Eric I walk up to the ring, just like I walk up to the many problems a teenager has to face, ready, prepared, knowing there will be much suffering and pain. I refuse to run away from a fight. I am in the ring, preparing for what will happen next. “Ding, ding.” The bell rings. Let the fight begin. I get pounded. Every one of his punches land, but I stand firm, not letting a little pain scare me away. I am exhausted, when it finally happens. My opponent hits me with a right, knocking me down. “1,” the referee yells. “2” I lay there confused, lost, hurt. “3” I remember all the pain and suffering I went through just to get to where I am now. I get up, refusing to quit. It is my turn to attack now. Boom! It is my turn to solve this problem life throws at me.
27
28
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
The Puzzle of Life by Rebecca They named her Rebecca Angelica Rivera. Growing up, she did not have a typical family. Her parents were not the best, due to her father’s drinking problem and her mother trying to make ends meet. They were absent a lot of her life. Although she was young, she felt a lot of pain and sadness. She wanted her mom and dad, as a family. The people who were there for her the most were her grandparents. When they had left to be in peace, there was a piece of her that she knew was missing. She tried her hardest to find a job and finally found this program called Servicios de la Raza. She was so excited to work. She worked day after day, not only for herself, but also to try to help her mom with a little financial support. It also helped her stay away from the problems that occurred in her household. She finally found the missing pieces to her puzzle of life and she will never stop looking for more, no matter what life throws at her.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
The Rhythm of Life by Kirk I find a rhythm on this drum called life, keep beating on it and beating on it until it sounds right. I build until I reach success. The more they scream, the more I go. I do not stop, I just keep the flow. What will I do next? I really do not know. To be honest, I just want to give the world the best show. If someone messes up, I need to keep going. If I stop, the beat stops and the rhythm stops flowing. Then, life would be boring. So, I continue with this energy because the songs need to end, but it has only just begun. Now, I do not want to stop because of all the cheers from my fans. “Scream, screams….cheer, cheers” as I provide these wonderful noises for their ears. See, I am the best and it is kind of clear now, “Scream, screams...cheer, cheers” while I shine like a chandelier.
29
30
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Her by Aleeya As a young girl, she never let anyone in. She was always mean and did not understand how to be a friend. She never learned and she never yearned to be someone's friend only because she thought she is all she ever needed in the end. A few years later, she caught on to the jist of things. She had friends, but only a few. She then realizes that she did not enjoy herself with those girls like she used to. So she fell back and observed the crew. She could tell by how they act like that towards her too. Now, she’s back to her old ways minding her own, while in her head she is sitting on a throne. She starts to think about being popular. She already had the looks but her attitude had them all shook. She realizes she is not going to change and does not have the energy to make them understand. So, she stops looking for friends and lets it come naturally. A while later, a good friendship is going. I am attached to her and she is attached to me.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Sisters, we thought but it turned into a catastrophe. So, I had to give her that fatality, She tried to put me down, so I had do the same. that “friendship� is 6 feet underground. But now I know, you can play nice and still catch that knife to the spine. So watch your back, do not ever get too attached. Stay humble and know who you are because at the end of the day I am the reason I got this far.
The Heart of My Ancestors by Sky I keep my heart wherever I go. It keeps me safe from the clueless souls. From Egypt to Puerto Rico, ancestors shine within me. The love pours from Europe and Japan, loving one another hand in hand gathering up like sand. It blows through the pores of my soul keeping my demeanor humble and whole. Every culture expresses who I am, for I am the heart of people with silver hair and gold hearts. I am Sky Perez, using my heart so the world does not tear apart.
31
32
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Bruises and Scars by Shelby Some scars are the game I play and others are the life I live. The battles I face are nothing compared to anyone. They do not matter to people who do not know me, but they matter to me. They mattered so much that I made scars on myself. I made my family worry. I was so self-absorbed I did not realize what I had done. I was stuck in a world of hate, a world of anger, anger towards myself, anger towards everyone. I could not feel my soul anymore. I was dead, but I picked myself back up. I made my way into the real world. Again, I fell, but I picked myself up again, and again, and again because what these people say about me does not define who I am. I am strong I am defined by myself.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Mexico by Angel I come from a place where I feel more freedom than in the “land of the free.” For once, I do not feel big brother watching over my shoulders. I will always remember my roots and hold my pride up high. I am thankful to come from a paradise, where trees stand tall and green, full of land and potential for a better future. I run free hoping to stay for a lifetime.
Scoring the Point by Amy I stand by myself on one side of the court, competing against my enemies and my thoughts. On the sideline, I have my biggest fan, the only person who supports me all the way. My mom yells, “Tu puedes! Don’t give up, you are better than them.” The ball comes and goes on both sides of the net. Every bump, set, spike is another lie,
33
34
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
down talk about me. But I am always ready, starting down low on my toes to respond with something better. I have never done drugs nor been in trouble with the law. It is a point for me each time I achieve these goals. It is never that easy to be on your own. I always doubt myself, which always leads me to make mistakes, giving my enemies more motivation to continue reaching for a win. When I see myself letting my mistakes take me down, I take a break, a break for myself to think of why I cannot give up now. I know that my mom went through difficult paths to raise 3 kids on her own and wants to see them all succeed, not letting others stop them from winning. I get myself back in the game to show them that just because I am by myself on this court, I can make it. As I stand there, ready to serve this winning point, I look at my mom’s face, full of excitement. She cries because she knows that I would make it. All the power that I put to get this far goes into scoring that last point, finally seeing myself graduate and not letting anything stand in my way.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Stranger by Nelson I will never forget the times I used to see this man, a stranger, coming to my visit me. When I was younger, I always wondered why this strange man would come in my house and be there for a couple of hours a day, just to get into arguments and fights. I also remember that same man picking me up every time he came over telling me that he loves me. I used to think about that man every night I went to sleep and wonder why this random man would come to see me. Even though I did not know much about this man, I will always remember him.
Love by Dia What is love, when no one wants to be there for you? I cry because finding love is something hard. When they love, they leave so soon. I want long lasting love where emotions will not die.
35
36
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Just Do It by Josh Skateboarding can be hard but never doubt yourself. You are the tricks to your board. So, grab some wheels and start stunting. Do not forget your bravery and remember to pick up your confidence, as life is about risk-taking. If you fall in pain and cry like a baby, do not go home. Say to yourself, “I can do this.� Motivate yourself! You can do whatever you put your mind to. So, get your ass up and stop dreaming Tony Hawk! Become something more, more talented, just ignore the injuries and avoid these haters. You can do this. Just do it!
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Get Up by Alex Quit being dumb. It’s not worth it to sit there and do nothing while your life goes by. It’s not worth it to hang out in your room and let your friends leave. So, get up. Go do something. You’ll be better for it. You’re welcome.
I Need Cheese! by Aleeya No matter how hard you may try, life will hit you with a wall, blocking you from your goals. Even when you find cheese in the maze, the ones who make you look for it can take it from you as easy as that. But we will still search for that cheese because that is how we survive. We need to eat. So, we scurry like rats since the government is taking our cheese. Once I find it, I will be okay because I will fight to keep it. I will get that cheese.
37
38
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
White Flag by Aaliyah A run-on sentence, no pause, no stop A correct way of doing things, but no eraser given to use. Only a pen and paper, no guns in use. My thoughts here left ashamed, hearing those sirens. What did you really gain? Grief of those around of clothes, why not just a bloody nose? That shot to the brain really did not ease the pain. So now, you have these scribbles on this paper and your teacher needs to grade you. You are left screaming, shouting to put your flag up, the white one.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Change by Cody Through my eyes, I see a world full of disappointments. I see people being things they are not, hiding behind anything they can to prevent their true selves from showing. They are afraid of all the people they call friends, judging them. But the truth is they do not have to be fake to feel great. You have the power to be anything you want to be. So what is the point of being fake and doings things that are not great.
Mexican Fam by Angel I am the delicious enchiladas my mom makes, a recipe passed down from our culture. I will always remember how enchiladas bring my family together. I am nopal growing from a Mexican family. People see my thorns and think I am dangerous, but they protect who I really am. I will never forget where I come from.
39
40
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
McCoy Family by Maurice We come from a beautiful mother, no father. All we ever had was her, but she is the best mother to have in your life. There is not one thing that could bring her down. In my opinion, she is the toughest woman out there because her childhood was cut short. By the time she could realize, she was a parent because her parents did not know how to. Now, she is the best mother and grandmother, ever. Since I had my son, my mom could not be more happy. She loves waking, talking, or even checking on him. I love my mother. I just got to say, my life is not important. It is all about the greatest woman ever, my mom. So many people try to walk over her but she does not mind because their day will come and so will hers. They are going to be judged, not her. My mom is the bigger person. I will always love her for that.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
I Am Not Alone by Anonymous I will never forget how it felt when you picked me up and screamed my name. You screamed, “Do not leave!� You wanted me to stay, even when I wanted to leave. I felt alone but as you smelled the vomit, as it burned your nose, I knew you were there. I will never forget when you kissed my forehead, when you prayed and cried, hoping I would still be there tomorrow. I will never forget as you sat in the shower with me cleaning up the blood, as you continued to cry. I will never forget that I am not alone.
41
42
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Who Am I? by Matthew I will always remember my family’s recipe of mac and cheese that always brings everyone to the table, no matter the happiness or anger. It smells delicious and drains your long day right out, filling your face and tummy with joy.
Regret by Rebecca It sometimes pulls us down, it sometimes makes us cry. It is always hiding in our mind, the one thing that never dies. We try to discard it we skip, we ignore, and we throw it. But as a rock, we are indestructible. Regret will always show itself. We pick up slowly and try not to let it get the best of us. We drag it and set it aside. No matter how bad we want it to go, the shadow will always follow. But it helps to think about the good, not the bad. Life is beautiful and people do not see that in rocks.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
Last Whistle by Shelby On the starting line, you have to look for weaker links, people who cannot stop you. You compete to be the best. Look out for those people who can bring you down or knock you out. Counter it. Do not let them control where you go. You cannot let life push you down. Once the worst is over, you go around and do it all over again. You cannot and should not stop fighting to be the best until the very last whistle.
Grandma by Dia Mom why did you go? Why didn’t you stay? You left me with these people who cheat me out of my day. I never felt so hurt. When you died, my life would not carry on. I love you forever. Rest in peace.
43
44
Contemporary Learning Academy Speaks! Vol. 2
Mirror by Josh I remember when I was younger. I kept saying to myself, “My only competition is the man in the mirror.� As time flies by, I am fighting these years with only my 2 ears, taking my advantage with the power inside me. I take notes as I listen looking in the mirror wishing I can be me. My eyes see a competition that only I can compete against. Will I overcome myself, or will I doubt myself as I did before. At that moment, I found myself in a better place laying in the bay full of mirrors looking at myself, feeling filthy rich, thanks to the man in the mirror. RIP to the old me.
Telling Our Stories Workshop Participants
In Need by Rebecca My dad needs to control. My dad needs to believe in love. My dad needs rehab. My mom needs to believe in love. My mom needs me. I do have control. I do not need his kind of rehab. I need my own. I am what they need. I am what they have. I am love.
I Do Not Want to Die by Dia I do not want to die! When you do, everyone forgets about you. I do not want to die because my presence will have a smile for my world. Dying is when you are gone forever and when you’re gone, you are only thought of sometimes. I do not want to die because taking my last breath would break my heart. When I die, no one will remember me. I want to live forever because life would be forever a gift.
45