EROFEB
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@KYRZAYDA_
MY BEFORE VS. MY AFTER WRITTEN BY: KYRZAYDA RODRIGUEZ No matter what your condition is, you are beautiful and you have the power to change the way people look at you. I decided not to wear a wig, because I want people to see me as I am.
A FIGHTER!
Don't be ashamed, embrace the beauty of fighting and allow people to love you for you! Tag someone who needs a little reminder that they are beautiful NO MATTER WHAT!!! #BYECANCER
Kyrzayda
RETFA
The truth is, I miss my full hair but; it's also a blessing to share my journey and inspire women with cancer that it's ok to be YOU.
FROM THE EDITOR*
MICHELLE WASHINGTON
2019
THE STATE OF THE WOMAN /STĀT/ /WOMB-MAN/ the particular condition that a woman is in at a specific time, as concerning circumstances or attributes: a state of health
EDITOR IN CHIEF I ASKED MYSELF THE FOLLOWING QUESTIONS:
What is the state of the woman today? Are we in a better position? Are we getting our fair share in this world of 7.6 billion people?
As we begin the new year with great hope and expectation, I decided to do a self-audit as a result of the recent #METOO and #TIMESUP movements. I wanted to reflect on if these alarming movements would be short-lived, emotional reactions to a deeply ingrained injustice or a movement of consistent change and positive progression. As I considered these questions, I began doing some research on Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. Every award show in 2018 spoke to these movements. The phrase "Me Too" was tweeted by Alyssa Milano around noon on October 15, 2017, and had been used more than 200,000 times by the end of that day and tweeted more than 500,000 times by October 16th. On Facebook, the hashtag was used by more than 4.7 million people in 12 million posts during the first 24 hours. The platform reported that 45% of users in the United States had a friend who had posted using the term. I discovered that Tarana Burke founded the Me Too movement in 2006. Burke began using the phrase "Me Too" to raise awareness of the pervasiveness of sexual abuse and assault in society, and the phrase developed into a broader movement in 2017 when the hashtag came into major use following the Harvey Weinstein sexual abuse allegations. I wondered why it took so long for this to become a national movement. Now, it’s 2019, and the movements are still moving, just like the embarrassment and devaluing of women, but not to the same magnitude. I’ve decided to make sure that I and Women of MORE magazine are not just creating a pathway of dynamic, positive progression for women, but that we are bringing all women together to keep the discussion going and creating solutions and networks in ways that will reach every aspect of the culture of women.
THIS IS “THE STATE OF THE WOMAN.”
At the start of this year, just like every year, I created a theme. For 2019, I have declared I will “advance without hesitation.” My mantra is be brave, be bold, be fierce, be focused, be fabulous. I have to tell you, it ain’t easy. Nineteen days into the new year and you run right up against something that has you questioning if you can really go another step, and hesitation is the only feeling you are feeling; giving up becomes easier than pressing forward. So what’s a girl to do? Fall down, retreat, reconsider, fail? Hell no! This is when you find out what it means to advance without hesitation. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. It is up to you to leap and soar into your greatness. You must never tire of your quest to go for your dreams. A few years ago I wrote a book, Hustle! Why now is the time to unleash your passions. I defined hustling as taking action before the perfect condition arises, before we have received permission, before it appears reasonable and before others anticipate our next move. We will have made nothing of ourselves or created anything significant unless we are prepared to hustle and take action now. Let’s be honest and brave in assessing our lives and ask ourselves: How hard am I really working toward my dream? Am I letting little obstacles stop my progress, or am I battling through them on a consistent basis? Am I acting with real conviction and commitment in life, or simply trudging through it? Have I struggled to succeed in any area of my life because I failed to sacrifice or commit? If we have real dreams then we must hustle for them. For the sake of our dreams and the results associated with achieving them we must remain hungry, ambitious, and courageous. When you are squarely committed to seeing your passion through to the realization of a dream, there is little time to waste. You cannot afford to grow tired or stall. You must commit to staying focused, staying in the flow and believing in yourself. Henry David Thoreau puts this so eloquently, “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” You can't even imagine what awaits you, if you just don't give up. That next best thing could be right around the corner. Take one more step, trust and believe. Stay focused on your dream and positioned in your purpose. Do whatever it takes to stay in the hustle and chase your desires. It's up to you to keep striving and serving the highest purpose for your talents, gifts and your life.
ADVANCEWITHOUT
HESITATION
By Darieth Chisolm Emmy Award Winning TV Host, Author, Speaker, Coach PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
Photographer: Matt Shuck Hair: Trey Brown Makeup: Becca Carl Credit: All for Her Event Washington Pa, Oct 21, 2018 PAGE NUMBER HERE
THE BATTLEFIELD OF THE MIND BY: Dr. Torri Love Griffin, LPC
We've all heard the expressions, “the mind is a battlefield” and “a mind is a terrible thing to waste.” Well, contrary to popular belief, nothing that the mind encounters (good or bad) is ever wasted. Every thought, every word and every incident is recorded in the mind and has some impact on how we live our lives. This is both good and bad news because the condition of our individual lives is based on the position we establish with our minds. We can decide that the bad things will continue or we can adjust and adapt and see ourselves becoming better with each experience. This constant conflict is what makes the mind feel like a battlefield. When we are young children, our minds record our every experience and stash them in our “this is how the world works” folder. As more information comes in that matches our experiences, our minds begin to formulate expectations that if x happens, then y must be on the way. Some of our early childhood experiences have led to our MISunderstanding that we were the cause of what happened to us and the resulting belief is that we are not worthy of love and are somehow not good enough.
Consequently, later in life, we find that we have certain beliefs that now guide us. Thinking that we are not good enough or smart enough, or pretty enough, or tall enough, or thick enough or any variety of not-enough, keeps us in patterns of selfdefeating behaviors that impact our decision-making. We actually act as if we are NOT enough.
Let’s say this together: 1. The past is the past. What happened to me did exactly that. It happened. It is not happening now and need not happen again. What I say about it is all that matters now. 2. Who I am and how I am now, regardless of what happened to me, is up to me. I can remember what I’ve been through and be grateful for the woman it has made me into without regret or sorrow. I am who I The battle that then wages decide to be with every new on within has to do with our moment. self-worth. Am I worthy of love? Am I worthy of 3. How my future looks depends on success? Am I worthy of the thoughts I allow myself to happiness? Am I worthy of ponder right now. What I riches? Have my experiences experience tomorrow is compiled shown me that I am capable from the sum total of all my and lovable or do I believe thoughts, feelings and actions that I am destined for today. disaster or poverty or sickness for no apparent reason? To win this battle we have to concentrate on three aspects of the mind—our memory of the past, our present experience and what we expect the future to hold. Putting these into perspective will always result in a win.
I AM MORE THAN ENOUGH AND I WIN!
NOBODY'S p e r f e c t BY CARLEEN ELISA
We seem to live in a world where the standard is perfection. Almost everyone wants the perfect body, the perfect family, the perfect job, the perfect relationship, the perfect… well you get the idea. Perfection is presented as this lofty goal that we’re all supposed to achieve. Social media is full of images of individuals showcasing their best selves and living their best lives. Using filters and editing apps, people create and present the best versions of themselves and tweet them out to the world - with their favorite hashtags of course. Then there's the media, which is full of stories about how having the perfect career and a perfect relationship can lead to the perfect life. It's no longer limited to the Kardashians, your favorite athlete or entertainer, or now your favorite social media sensation; you, too, can have the perfect life if you just model the right behavior, wear the right clothing, use the right filters in your selfies, create the right persona, have the right social media following and find acceptance from just the right players. REALLY?!?!?!?!?! The truth is if it were that simple everyone would have the perfect life. All the images you see in post, after post, after post would lead to success stories about how just about everyone you know is living their best lives to perfection. But that isn’t the case because there is no such thing as perfection – PERIOD. We all struggle and fail at times, but we all are capable of absolutely bringing our “A” game and achieving great things. Michael Jordan is arguably the greatest basketball player of all times. In a commercial for his Air Jordan sneakers, Jordan lists stats that not too many people would want to brag about. He stated, “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot… and missed. I’ve failed over, and over, and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Notice, Jordan wasn’t perfect, yet he is considered the greatest, which demonstrates that perfection is not a requirement for greatness, but giving your best consistently is.
@CARLEENELISA
Now don't get me wrong, being great takes great effort.
Now don’t get me wrong, being great takes great effort. You must determine what you want to achieve, develop a plan and be willing to put in the work. Look to those who have achieved greatness and follow suit because success leaves clues. So, as you begin 2019, make it your goal to be your best and do your best. You determine how the world sees you and the degree to which you exercise your gifts and utilize your talents. You determine how excellent or average you want to be. You may not be perfect, but you most certainly can show up as the best version of yourself each and every day – with your own unique style, flair, personality and ability to contribute to the world.
INVISIBLE WOUND
BY: YVONNE CHAMPION @LETTEMEKNOW
After being abruptly awakened from my sleep with accusations of cheating, disoriented I jumped out of bed. The only way to calm him was to get up and listen. This scene was a recently recurring one. He'd wait until I was in a deep sleep to wake me. His voice escalated. It was 3:00 am, and I was tired. Having had enough, I quickly turned around. In an instant, everything went black. My back hit the wall, and I slid down, landing on the floor. Although it happened so quickly, this memory would replay in slow motion in my head and heart for years. Did I walk into an imaginary wall or did he... Did he just hit me? The room was spinning. I covered my left eye. My vision was blurred. I saw a black shadow. Will was the shadow. The hatred in his eyes pierced my soul. I jumped, my hand fell, and instantly a warm liquid dripped. It was my blood. Struggling to stand, I gripped the wall behind me. "I'm sorry," he said. I ran to the bathroom and locked the door.
I stood at the sink dazed. My eye burned as the tears and blood mixed. I grabbed a washcloth and held it to my eye. Fighting through fear, I looked in the mirror and screamed, "NO!" My face was transformed. He banged on the door. The more he banged, the more I cried. "Baby it was a mistake." Anxiety consumed me. My heartbeat increased, and I fell on the cold floor in a fetal position. Wearing a bloodied t-shirt and panties, I cried and rocked myself. I was an abused woman. In the beginning, he was kind and loving. Money and material things were generously provided, but things changed. The past five years were emotionally and mentally draining. No one saw my invisible wounds. A voice spoke from within, "Get up." I looked around the bathroom. I heard this voice before in times of trouble. Was I in danger? "Get up and clean your face." I stood and looked in the mirror. My eye was swollen. A gash was underneath my eyebrow; this would leave a scar. After cleaning my face, I opened the door and there stood Will. I walked back to the bed and laid on my stomach. He got in, rolled me on my back and got on top. I closed my eyes. My body went numb. I yelled stop, but nothing came out. After he finished, he kissed my cheek -the same side he'd just punched -and went to sleep. Traumatized, I blamed God. That morning Will impregnated me. I felt alone with no one to talk to. There has to be more for me than this. The voice said, "I'm here. You can talk to me."
BECOMING MORE
8
THINGS TO LEAVE BEHIND BY: TARIA PRITCHETT @UNLEASHFIERCE
As you continue on your journey to unpacking and unleashing the MORE that is within you, here’s what you must leave behind to make room for what’s to come:
The fear that you are not good enough You have made too much progress and survived way too many things to think you are still not qualified or just as worthy as the next woman. There is MORE to you!
The expectation that God is going to do what you want God doesn’t give you what you want, He gives you what you need based on what He NEEDS you to do and who He needs you to BECOME. Surrender to doing less so that God can step up and do MORE in your life. The unhealthy thoughts that consume your mind Your beliefs are running your life and if you let it get too out of hand, it could cause damage that ruins your opportunity to move forward to your divine destiny. The more negative the thought, the more it decreases your belief in yourself. Release this habit.
The part of yourself that needs someone to fill a void No one else is responsible for your happiness: not a man, your child, friend, no one! Learn to love you and the rest will follow. There is MORE to you if only you would look within. The unhealthy relationships and connections that drain you You are not obligated to connect with someone that does not bring joy or fulfillment into your life. Instead focus on being full and whole MORE so that you can attract healthier relationships. The belief that you still don’t know your purpose Stop sleeping on your skills and stop sitting back on the sidelines waiting for purpose to find you. God knew you before you were in your mother’s womb, therefore where you feel you fall short, God already knows there’s MORE to you. Tap into it and become it.
The guilt/shame you feel for past mistakes Your past mistakes are anointed to connect with your purpose. Be gentle with yourself. Forgive and let go. As long as you learn from it, you can keep going and use it purposefully for your next level.
The belief that someone/something is going to save you Only God can move you from your current circumstance. No man, family member, child, or even coach is coming to save you from where you are or where you hoped to be by now. It is your responsibility to make the decision to be a woman of MORE.
It is imperative that you work on these as you enter a new season so that you can experience what M.O.R.E. God has for you in this season. God wants to bring you Miracles, Opportunities, Relationships, and Experiences that glorify Him, but also elevate you!
Un cafesito Dominicano a esta hora que Rico *TRANSLATION*
A Dominican coffee at this time that's rich.
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HOW TO BUILD YOUR BUSINESS CREDIT SCORE BY: VANESSA LINDLEY | FB: LindleyConsultingGroup | www.LindleyConsultingGroup.com
Having a favorable credit score is vital for a business to obtain necessary funding for its future capital needs and growth. But a good credit rating does not come instantly. These steps will help improve your business credit rating as well as maintain a favorable reputation to lenders and investors.
3. Check Your Business Listings Have your company listed under all the necessary agencies under the same exact legal name, phone number and address. It is very important for all your creditors to list you under a uniform identity. 4. Obtain All Necessary Business Licenses, Permits, etc. Obtain a business license for your company and if applicable, a license for tax resale in the state, city or county location of your business. Follow all the necessary regulatory guidelines for running your business. 5. Organize Financial Statements and Tax Returns Be ready to present at least two years of financial statements using the help of a CPA or business owner financial software. It is very important that your business has its own tax ID number. Both federal and state business tax ID numbers should be listed under the same exact legal business name. 6. Secure Bank References How you manage cash flow in your business will be reflected in your banking. A minimum of one bank reference is necessary for your business to establish its score. Ideally your bank account should be active for at least two years, with a good stable balance for three months for it to be in a favorable position for lending.
1. Make Sure Your Business is a Legal Entity Your business will not be able to build business credit if it does not have an entity. Consult an attorney about incorporating or form an LLC (Limited Liability Company). Lenders generally will not give a business loan to a sole proprietor because it might be a personal loan in disguise. 2. Have a Business Address, Telephone Line, Email and Website Having a physical location for your company adds credibility for lenders to believe that your company is legitimate. Ideally your office address is not your home address. There are several co-working spaces where you can obtain an address to use at a reasonable cost. Having a business phone line, email address and a website is also essential.
7. Obtain At Least Five Trade References Your business will need five trade references that have given you a credit account. This may include your suppliers or any firm in which your company has purchased goods on a regular basis. Make sure to choose references that will give a favorable credit history. 8. Apply for Credit that is Reported to Agencies Get three business credit cards that do not have personal links to you and will give business credit reporting agencies their feedback on your company. These tips will put you in position for growth. You may not have time to get ready when opportunity knocks, you want to stay ready.
WARNING! THIS PRODUCT CONTAINS NICOTINE BY: DENISE M. JORDAN MA, RN COMMUNITY/PUBLIC HEALTH NURSING, RETIRED @THISANDTHATWITHDENISE
@THISANDTHATWITHDENISEJORDAN
Sorry to disabuse you of that notion, but no. This WAIT! WHAT? is not a flash drive. It’s a popular form of an ecigarette called a Juul. To NICOTINE? ISN’T “smoke it” or smoke “with it” is called Juuling. Who’s using it? According to the THAT A FLASH 2017 edition of Monitoring the Future, a continuing study of American youth, one in four high school DRIVE? OR A JUMP students reported vaping or using electronic cigarettes (e-cigarettes). Is DRIVE? OR SOME your child one of the 1 in 4? Like most e-cigarettes, Juuls require the use of a cartridge or pod to hold a liquid-filled substance that, when inhaled through the device, forms a vapor. This vapor contains nicotine and other harmful substances. Nicotine is addictive and can harm adolescent brain development. Vaping and Juuling, just like smoking, are bad. It’s bad for kids. It’s bad for teens. And, it’s bad for young adults.
KIND OF PHOTO STICK? WHAT IS VAPING?
WHAT IS A JUUL?
It is a compact e-cigarette device that looks like a flash drive and charges on the USB port of a computer. It’s small enough to slip into a pocket and because of how it looks, it often escapes detection by teachers and parents. It creates less smoke than other e-cigarettes so kids are often able to use it in the classroom and elsewhere undetected. HOW DOES IT WORK?
Insert the cartridge or pod into the device, place the device between the lips, and inhale. This draws in the vapor and various chemicals that are in the vapor. These include nicotine and may include carcinogens. The pods come in various flavors - crème brulee, mango, blueberry, and more - which make them particularly appealing to high school and middle school students. A single Juul cartridge provides about 200 puffs which is equivalent to the nicotine found in one pack of cigarettes. In most states, you have to be over 21 to purchase tobacco or e-cigarette products. They are sold online, in convenience stores, gas stations, and some big box stores like Walmart. It is believed that a child who starts out vaping is more likely to progress to tobacco-based products.
Vaping is smoking using an electronic device called an ecigarette. E-cigarettes were created as alternatives to tobacco-based products. They were meant to target Talk to your child about smoking, vaping, and those who were already nicotine users; however, teens who might not Juuling. Let him or her know your thoughts and why you believe it’s a bad idea. have considered picking up a cigarette are choosing to vape.
REFERENCES: 1 Tiny juul device getting U.S. teens hooked on vaping. April 11, 2018 Dennis Thompson, Health Day Reporter: https://consumer.healthday.com/cancer-information-5/electronic-cigarettes970/tiny-juul-device-getting-u-s-teens-hooked-on-vaping-732779.html 2 Monitoring the Future. National Adolescent Drug Trends in 2017: Findings Released: http://www.monitoringthefuture.org/pressreleases/17drugpr.pdf 3 Quick Facts on the Risks of E-cigarettes for Kids, Teens, and Young Adults: https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/basic_information/e-cigarettes/Quick-Facts-on-the-Risks-of-E-cigarettes-forKids-Teens-and-Young-Adults.html 4 Juul E-Cigarettes: A New Threat to Kids: https://www.tobaccofreekids.org/what-we-do/industry-watch/e-cigarettes
IT IS OK
Not To Be Ok BY: SHAUNDYLL ROGERS @SHAUNDYLLROGERS
@FINDINGFREEDOMWITHSHAUNDYLL
Sometimes life will hit us like a ton of bricks flying off the back of a truck going 100 miles an hour. Recently, I found myself feeling like I had been BEAT DOWN by life. There were so many moments when I felt alone. I had convinced myself that people had their own “things” to deal with and no one wanted to listen to what I was going through. I had allowed the pressure of the circumstances to surround me and create a barrier between me and the people that I had valuable relationships with. It wasn’t a barrier of protection per se, but instead a barrier used to “fool” the world into thinking that I was ok. See, it’s easy to fool people when they don’t have the ability to get close and discern that something is wrong. Over time, however, this weight began to become too much for me to bear. I was crying all the time and one morning, I even had to convince myself to wake up and get up. Once I got moving, I would have “the talk” with myself and go on with my day. What is the talk? It’s the conversation where I convince myself that I am ok. It’s a skill I learned as the oldest child. I was the go-to person for my younger siblings’ hurts and problems, so I learned to appear strong even when I didn’t feel strong.
Fast forward, my husband and I were hanging out with a set of married friends. My girlfriend and I were secluded away in the kitchen chatting. She looked across the table at me and asked, "How are you?" I evaded the question by responding really quickly, “Good, how have you been?” After catching me up on the latest and greatest, she REPEATED a question that she had ALREADY asked me. “So, how have you been doing?” Now, this time, I knew I had a choice. I could believe the lie that I told myself about no one caring or I could challenge that thought and take a different action. I took a breath, looked up and kept it real. The reality was that I wasn’t ok. I slowly unloaded my bricks in the safety of our friendship, and guess what? She was carrying an almost IDENTICAL load and struggling with the SAME feelings of loneliness and isolation. I walked away from our conversation that evening feeling lighter, filled with hope, and full of appreciation. My only disappointment, was that I didn’t do it sooner. Each day will not be butterflies, rainbows and roses. Life happens to the best of us, but we do ourselves a disservice when we allow what’s happening to create a persona of perfection and a barrier of isolation. Make a choice to stop believing the lie and allow yourself to be ok with not being ok. You’ll open yourself up to FREEDOM.
IN ORDER TO LOOK BEAUTIFUL YOU DON'T NEED TO SPEND A FORTUNE WRITTEN BY: Kyrzayda Rodriguez
In order to look beautiful you don’t need to spend a fortune. The goal was to create looks with different patterns, mix colors, and not really care what anyone thought. The most important opinion would be mine, to love my own skin. After several years of doing what I love, I became aware how many other women wanted the same thing, to be themselves and express their love through clothing. They just want to look good and confident. I love that @modcloth is an amazing brand that gives women the opportunity to style pieces at great prices and look amazing. I’m loving this complete look from @modcloth which you can shop @liketoknowit #modclothsquad #sayitlouder PHOTO CREDIT: GERALDINE TORRES
@GERI_1221
PLANNED PURPOSE BY: RAINBOW HUFF
Trying to identify and achieve God’s purpose and plans for your life can seem overwhelming. Below are five key tips to help you become successful at doing both:
GOD HAS GREAT PLANS FOR YOUR LIFE. USE THESE TIPS TO DISCOVER WHAT THEY ARE AND LIVE A LIFE OF PLANNED PURPOSE! 1. Seek God first: Ask God to reveal His purpose and plans for your life. You may have grand ideas about what you want to do and be, but you must surrender those to God. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts and His plans are always so much better. After all, we were created for a specific purpose, with God-ordained plans. Why not ask the Creator what they are? 2. Pray and prepare: After God has revealed His purpose and plans for your life, spend time in prayer asking the who, what, where, when and why. If God has given you a vision, He will also provide you with everything you need to fulfill that vision. Remaining connected to Him through prayer will reveal what those people and things are. With God, all things are possible, not guaranteed. It’s imperative you properly prepare for the things God wants to do in and through your life. You can’t be prepared if you haven’t made any plans. Write the vision and make it plain!
3. Do things afraid: There will be things that God has planned for your life that will absolutely terrify you. Do them anyway, even if you have to do them afraid! Fear will stunt your growth and progress if you let it. How many times have you let fear hinder you from moving forward? Remember, fear is nothing more than a spirit. You have the power to overcome fear by feeding your faith more than you feed it. 4. Avoid distractions: When you’re focused on God’s purpose and plans for your life, you will inevitably become the target of distractions. Distractions can be deadly to your plans and, ultimately, your purpose. Whether it’s a draining relationship, the spirit of comparison or the desire to spend hours scrolling through social media, you must recognize them for what they are. Learn how to say no and mean it. Hold yourself accountable to meeting your goals. These distractions come only to steal, kill and destroy your time, energy and focus!
5. Celebrate and reflect: Take time to celebrate and reflect! Celebrate the small successes as well as the big ones. Pat yourself on the back for accomplishing what seemed impossible a few years or even a few months ago. Reflect on the experiences you’ve had throughout your journey. Be honest with yourself about what you’ve done well and where areas of opportunity for growth may exist. Give yourself grace, too; knowing that God will always finish the good thing He’s started in you. You’ll make mistakes along the way and that’s okay! Mistakes are lessons that can be used for continued growth and success.
@RAINBOWISHERNAME @RAINBOWUFF
I believe that when God created women, He took a little creativity, a dab of intuitiveness, a dash of intelligence and innovative thinking, a pinch of His long suffering, and a mix of His strength and created us to be powerful, influential, world-changers who are able to wear multiple hats while accomplishing great things. From the beginning of time, women were entrusted to birth and raise world-changers and carry out worldchanging activity. But in today’s society, in order to be a worldchanger, it’s important to get invited to THE TABLE. I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was both confident and nervous. ‘What should I wear? Do I have the right USB drive? Do I have my presentation saved properly? Malaika, you can do this! How early should I get there? Is this really happening? Wait, what if I can’t answer the questions? Girl, you didn’t come this far to fail!’ All of these little voices in my head asking a barrage of questions and making declarations as I prepared for the big day – the day I defended my dissertation.
I thought it would be exciting. But, as many of my doctoral cronies have shared, it can be quite anticlimactic. You spend years writing, participating in classes, engaged in discussions, writing countless papers, preparing presentations, facilitating group sessions, sitting through critical feedback, and spending an inordinate amount of money just to create research that you hope will impact your field and change the trajectory of your life. Can you guess what happened after I defended my dissertation? Well, I didn’t immediately get a raise or a promotion. It didn’t immediately raise my status on the job. And there were no balloons falling from the ceiling or confetti being thrown. However, what I did get was something that has been a game changer. I got a seat at THE TABLE. The table represents access. It is a platform that affords you the opportunity to engage in closed-door conversations where decisions are made, policies are developed, and ideas are birthed. Hopefully, your hard work and assiduous attention to success will provide you a seat at the table. For me, it was the Ph.D., but for you it may be completing college, publishing a book, starting your own business or nonprofit, or anything that holds weight and elevates your status enough to be invited to the table. The table is where your voice is heard, your thoughts are considered, and your refreshing new perspective mixed with all that Godgiven goodness is welcomed.
THE TABLE BY DR. MALAIKA TURNER
Here are three things that will help you maintain your seat and make an impact while at the table: 1. ACCEPT that you have something important to contribute. Your passion, skills, knowledge, and articulation of thought have been recognized and is needed. 2. EMBRACE the position of innovator. This mindset will elevate your contribution and productivity. 3. POSITION yourself by being wellread and prepared to contribute. Make it a priority to stay informed about what’s trending in your field. Lastly, know that you were equipped at birth to do great things. There is no one created to do what you do, so when you take your seat at the table, remember that God is with you and this is your time and season to make a difference.
IN THE WORDS OF KYRZAYDA, “GO, DO IT. DON’T WAIT FOR ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER HOUR OR ANOTHER TIME. GO AND DO IT, NOW!” WRITTEN BY JOANNE GONZALEZ
The Love and Legacy of
BEST
Some of you may ask who is Kyrzayda Rodriguez? Well, let me tell you, she was a fighter, a warrior and woman like no other. Not only is she my mentor,my friend - my best friend, but my sister. November 2017 was when everything changed. We were traveling the world - Paris, Barcelona, Italy - going to fun events, and enjoying life. Then the unexpected happened. Now, I ask all of you, please don’t take any pity on her because that’s not what she wanted. She was diagnosed with Stage 4 stomach cancer at the age of 39. The doctors told us that she only had a couple of months to live, but let me tell you that was not an option for Kyrz. She fought for almost a year. One thing she made clear is that she wanted people to follow her journey. Her voice was going to be heard; it was beyond fashion. This was her life she was flighting for and even then she was for encouraging others to follow their dreams and not to waste any time. You didn’t have to know Kyrz on a personal level to know that she was a fighter. Through all the good and the bad, I witnessed her battle with all her might. Her passion for all things truly made me a better person. Kyrz’s Closet was one of the many things she was passionate about. Her online boutique was created to inspire women to always feel confident and beautiful. She would style key pieces and show you how to rock it different ways. When we noticed that things weren’t getting better she would always say to me, "Joanna, please make sure my family is okay", and of course I always told her she had nothing to worry about. With Kyrz’s Closet, we are able to provide for her family and keep that promise as a team.
FRIENDS
THE VISIBILITY FACTOR: 4 KEYS TO GROW YOUR INFLUENCE, IMPACT AND INCOME BY: DR. CHERITA WEATHERSPOON You were called to influence and impact the world. But to do so, people need to know who you are. They need to hear your message, feel your energy, and experience YOU! Visibility is the primary factor to you manifesting the influence and impact you were created to have. That means no more hiding. It’s no longer enough to post other people’s quotes or lurk in the comments of viral posts, periodically giving short and quick doses of the medicine you hold in your head and heart to heal thousands of people. If these words are resonating with you or you felt a few flutters in your chest or belly as you were reading, this message is for you. Read on for the four keys that will uplevel your influence and impact.
VISIBILITY = INFLUENCE + IMPACT + INCOME
1. CHOOSE TO BELIEVE YOUR MESSAGE MATTERS This may seem obvious, but I would bet money that fear is one of the primary reasons you haven’t staked your claim in the marketplace. You’re afraid that what you have to say doesn’t matter. I can tell you with certainty that it matters to the people waiting on you – waiting to hear your story and experience your solution in a way that only you can deliver. It’s your choice to make. Choose to believe that your message matters.
2. DETERMINE YOUR CONTENT CORE Developing content can seem overwhelming, and you may get stuck trying to determine what to share. However, if you simplify your options, you can simplify the entire process. You don’t have to talk about everything that everyone else is talking about or even everything within a particular industry or niche. Think deeply about your message and identify three content areas from which 90% of your content will come. Within your content core, you can create hundreds (if not thousands) of pieces of content, including quotes, tips, keys, infographics, strategies, checklists, ebooks, webinars, speeches, etc.
3. FIND YOUR AUDIENCE Now, you need to find the people who want to hear your message. This will take some research. Find out where your audience is hanging out and where they are looking for content like yours. For example, if you’re in leadership development, you may find leaders on Facebook, but are they looking for leadership development content on that platform or are they only there for entertainment. You may find your audience on one or more of the social media platforms, but you may very well find them in Meetup groups, professional associations, conferences, or reading magazines and books. Wherever they are is where you need to be.
4. DELIVER YOUR MESSAGE
This is where you will see your influence rise. The more visible you are, the more people will view you as an expert. When people view you as an expert, they will seek you out to solve their problems. Here is where you will see your impact increase. Balancing your message between delivering value and delivering a solution - meaning you consistently communicate that you have the solution, give experiences of that solution and periodically offer the solution – will transform your influence and impact into income. The key is WWW.CHERITAWEATHERSPOON.COM consistency.
LET'S TALK
PUSHING MYSELF
WRITTEN BY: KYRZAYDA RODRIGUEZ COURTESY OF @KYRZAYDA INSTAGRAM PAGE
Ithese have been pushing myself a little extra past weeks. 1.amI keep reminding myselfcommunity. how blessed I to have this amazing 2.Trust I refuse to give upenough just because I'mbut sick.a me, I'm doing sleeping, little work in between is good for the soul. 3.INSTAGRAM) Also find a @ger_1221 (FINDwith HERmeONit's she's so patient not even funny. Sorry for allis now the the chemo crankiness. This look on the blog @vicidolls #boyfriendjeans rocking #lotd at
Kyrazayda PHOTO CREDIT: GERALDINE TORRES @GERI_1221
INSPIRING TRUEFORMS Everyone has a fashion story to tell, I just didn’t know that I would be telling mine this soon. As a little girl, I was introduced to fashion in a pretty normal way. Little girls wore dresses, pink was your assigned color by default. Little did I know the way I would look at fashion would be totally different than what we were taught as little girls dressed by our mothers, playing dress-up in our mother's clothes or playing with pre-orchestrated styled dolls. My earliest memory of inspiration of style was my great grandmother Katie Richardson. Sweet memories of rice pudding cold from the icebox, background noise of afternoon soap operas and endless boxes of jewelry. Katie Richardson was something in her day I was told, second hand of course by means of eavesdropping. The way I remember her.. full robes with a matching turban wrapped around her head accented by huge beautiful jeweled brooches. Rings on almost every one of her fingers and wine-stained lips. I just knew she was a queen and the women around her especially my grandmother respect her as so. Here, where I was lead to my second inspiration, my grandmother. Jig, my beloved given name for her gave me not only an understanding of fashion but a lesson on knowing your TrueForm. Eighty plus years old and still a lady ahead of her fashion epoch. Once a seamstress a true lover of fashion she taught me textiles before I could even spell textiles. Exploring her slip drawers, pale colors of silks, satins, and lace. Here was my first lesson and the second to follow. Early on I was taught it was just as important to have the right thing on underneath than on top. Seeing how to mix color palettes by the way she styled each outfit she wore. Watching her for hours as she curated her wardrobe for each season year after year. Spending time with my grandmother as a little girl was always a special time for me. I remember as a child trips to Wanamaker's picking up endless packages from orders that she placed. She was always greeted as ma’am or Mrs. her personally assigned an associate to tend to any of her requests. An eye for detail she examined each garment for imperfections and finally making sure the fabric laid properly in its true form. I couldn’t wait to see how she would bring each garment to life with her final touches.
Over the years I as well developed this organic eye for form and style. Keeping classic pieces as the base of my wardrobe always allowed me to be an inspiration to myself and my TrueForm. I like to think that I challenge women to go against the mold, what social media projects or the trend. To once again find their TrueForm and allow their style to emerge. My philosophy in fashion is the same as my philosophy in life, it’s full circle. Health, beauty, lifestyle, and fashion all work harmoniously to showcase your TrueForm, your sense of style. In creating inspirations of style for women I take all of these components into consideration. Inspiration is what you define it to be, we give it permission to navigate its destiny. I never took my open invitation to visit Kyrzayda in Montclair at the boutique in 2016. That never defined the inspiration she was to me with style and her look on life. Inspiration is something that fuels us, something that pushes us to stand out from the rest. The women in my family have taught me this over and over again. I want to be that for my son, my daughter, young girls and women. Inspire them to find their form and be the best version of themselves and all that is true to them.
IN TRIBUTE TO KYRZAYDA, YOUR INSPIRATION TO US ALL WILL REMAIN LIKE THE CLASSIC LITTLE BLACK DRESS, A STAPLE OF FASHION INSPIRATION. SIOBHAN KIMBERLY FOUNDER, HERCHAOSGIRL
Ashli RICE WHO KNEW THAT I WOULD LATER BE SINGING FOR TENS OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE AT A TIME.
WOMMAG: WHEN DID SINGING BEGIN FOR YOU? AR: My story is very familiar and hopefully relatable to my audience as I started off singing in the church at age 3.My grandfather, who was a preacher and musician, started teaching me songs and having me sing in front of his congregation. I did my first concert at age 6 at a local church outside of Philly. I remember being nervous but I went out there and gave it all I had in a red and white power suit. Who knew that I would later be singing for tens of thousands of people at a time.
" N A M O W " E NEW SINGL
N A M O W
WOMMAG: HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH THE NAME OF YOUR NEW ALBUM? AR: Woman is not just a song it is a movement and call to action for Women everywhere. My manager encouraged me to create a song that would stir the hearts and minds of women. I wanted to encourage women not to give up and fight on, especially in our country's current climate. So, what better name for all of that than to dedicate it to you, WOMAN. WOMMAG: WHAT DO YOU WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW ABOUT YOU AND YOUR MUSIC? AR: I am a soul singer at heart but I love to mix and blend different styles. I'm a child of God, so I want people to feel the reflective nature of that Spirit in the words and the sounds that they hear. You will continue to hear strong, bold power statement songs from me. I want to encourage my audience and create a new type of sound called Motivation Music. I believe I was blessed with this particular gift to be able to share it with the world in a positive way. PHOTO CREDIT: KYRISE ALLEN
WOMMAG: WHAT’S NEXT FOR YOU? AR: Well, I am going to continue to promote the two singles on this project (both are powerful) and prepare for my larger EP that will be released later this year. I am going to enjoy starting my fourth season as the National Anthem Singer for the MLS's Philadelphia Union. There will be several spot dates along the East Coast where people can hear me perform. Visit www.ashliricemusic.com for more information.
WOMMAG: WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO WOMEN AROUND THE WORLD? AR: I would say DREAM and never give up on what's been birthed inside you. No matter what life's circumstance may be, never stop dreaming!
FOLLOW ASHLI NOW @ASHLIRICEMUSIC
INVITES ALL TO TRY GOLF
WRITTEN BY BRIGETTE WHITE CEO OF TOPIC STUDIO PHOTOGRAPHY
Out of a love for golf and her own personal desire to play everyday, Wellesley, Massachusetts native Tari Cash created CitySwing, a convenient place in Washington, DC to practice. “I love living in this city and the energy that I receive from downtown Washington, DC. One Friday afternoon I finished work early and wanted to practice my golf swing. Beltway traffic was so bad, it overwhelmed my desire to drive anywhere, including the golf course. I needed a space to play and I learned about indoor golfing experiences.” Cash graduated from Harvard University attaining her Master's Degree in Business and Administration. Cash’s interest in golf started at a young age. “My father joined a Country Club when I was in high school. One Fathers Day, my mother insisted that she, my brother and I take two lessons and then surprise my Dad on Father’s Day with a family round of golf,” said Cash. Cash said the game moved slowly and that she didn’t fall in love with golf until about 2014 when she joined the Country club at Woodmore in Maryland. “Golf is a game of strategy and skill, and I'm constantly competing against and pushing myself to get better. As an adult, there are fewer activities that I can play with men and women that bring out my competitive and strategic side. I love the ability to dedicate myself to golf, and then practice, and see the progression. The feeling of advancement is addictive!” Cash considers CitySwing to be unlike any other golfing experience, creating an environment that is welcoming to any age, race, gender, non-gender, creed, and skill level without having to be a member of a club. “There are historical reasons why women and African Americans don’t play golf at the same rate as others. First and foremost, several of the most prestigious golf clubs in the country excluded African Americans until the 1990s. Today, there are still Clubs local to the DMV) that excuse women. If you’re not included in “the club” you’re automatically excluded from reaping the professional benefits.” In 2018, a group of African American women said the Grandview Golf course in York County, Pennsylvania called the police on them for playing the game too slow. Eventually the women left on their own and no charges were filed.
“This incident was infuriating, heartbreaking, and extremely motivating. I want more women and people of color to play golf.” Cash joked that she would play golf every day if she could and wants to introduce her passion for the game to those who maybe turned off by the sport. “I want all of US to feel invited, included, welcomed, and confident on the golf course. I believe it’s a great game and I want people to love it as much as I do. There are professional benefits to playing and feeling comfortable around the game because business is done on golf courses. Deals are made, networking relationships are formed, and promotions are handed out. I firmly believe “you can’t win, if you are not in the game,” said Cash. The indoor golfing experience is operated by the TrackMan 4’s Dual Radar Technology and performance tracking system that is trusted by more than 800 golf professionals. “The technology is amazing and easy to use. I literally feel connected to an actual golf course. Virtual reality golf will level the playing field for kids usually not exposed to this fun and strategic thinking sport. With more practice at CitySwing and teaching from my sister Alexis Johnson, I’m confident my swing will improve,” said Nasir Qadree, a patron of City Swing. CitySwing is a place where traditional golfers and nontraditional participants of golf share the same space, giving high-fives and celebrating each other’s great strides. “We exist for golfers in the city that want a place to play or practice when time, weather, proximity and traffic prevent traditional play. We exist as well for aspiring golfers to learn and access the game in a fun, non-intimidating environment,” said Cash.
WHO IS SHAMINA TAYLOR?
Shamina Taylor is a Spiritual Badass Business Mentor and Teacher, Manifesting Queen, Soul-Cial Influencer, Attorney, Writer, Mother, Reiki Master Healer, and Humanitarian. Her work now is dedicated to helping others empower themselves. She is raw, unfiltered and isn’t afraid to say what is on her mind. One day she had a moment that altered the course of her entire life path. She left the life she had created behind. A life many would dream of. To many she had it all, that picture perfect life. But something was calling to her, it was coming from deep within her soul telling her she had a greater purpose. This was her intuition and a force greater than her, that was guiding her during her transformation and she listened to it every step of the way. She spent years healing, practicing different spiritual modalities, to help peel back the layers of unwanted beliefs she had picked up in this lifetime. Beliefs that didn’t serve her, the ones holding her back from her greatness. Healing herself, is how she empowered her most authentic self to emerge. She found her happiness came from within and wasn’t measured by her external achievements. This led her to finding her greatest peace within and led her to speaking her truth no matter what. It wasn’t an overnight event. Transforming her life didn’t start until she stopped running, hiding, stuffing her pain away. She went into solitude for most of these years and even was celibate for many of them. She knew if she was going to grow she had to do whatever it took to free herself from her past. It meant doing that deep self-reflection, seeing the darkness that keeps most people stuck in their lives. She was done running. So she went inward to do the deep self-development and spiritual work. She eventually re-emerged into society with these great wisdoms that were coming from her that she learned on her journey. She knows her calling is to now to help encourage and teach others to awaken to their own deep soul purpose. Shamina is unique as she has done the work (continues to do the work) but she isn’t like other spiritual gurus, because she bridges the gap between personal development and spiritual growth. As she believes you cannot have one without the other. She has several books coming out soon. One on manifesting how to create the life of your dreams and the other is her Memoir.
AS WOMEN, WHAT SHOULD WE BE FOCUSING ON?
Finding our voice, our true calling and using it! Empowering our gifts and allowing our strengths to shine through. Women are such powerful creators and we are powerful nurtures. Our default is catering to others, it is our natural inherent desire. To make sure everyone else is taken care of. But we need to be more dedicated to what we like, what do we desire, what is good for us and our souls. It is so important to bring our message to the world. To do so we need to make sure we are giving our message a voice. This sometimes means we need to release the shame and judgment we carry as women. The feeling we have no right to stand up and speak up. There is something within us that wants us to present the best us but it isn’t our most authentic self. So we need to be more real, genuine. Show up in our strength.
Shamina TAYLOR
It is my belief many women feel they have to do everything and be everything to everyone and there is no time for me to be ME. But it is your time. Time for you to stand up for what you believe in and do what we were meant to do in this lifetime. And that can seem selfish to many but it is necessary to empower ourselves and our voices. If we keep placing ourselves last that is what will continue to happen to our message and our dreams and that isn’t an option in my book.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE KNOWN FOR?
Empowering women to create a life of their dreams. For women to know they never have to settle for anything that doesn’t make them happy. That there is always a way. You don’t have to be a trapped to your current situation or be a victim of your past circumstances. That you can have it all. I truly believe that when we as women come together to grow and inspire each other we end up with a sisterhood of women who are living the life they always knew they wanted but didn’t believe they could achieve. I want to help instill this in women, if you can believe it then you can achieve it because every person has a beautiful light within them and I want them to see their light. Anything is possible and I am living proof of that. We can rebuild ourselves at any stage of our life. After children before children after divorce, after the death of a loved one. It is never too late to become who you have always wanted to become. There is no "my time has passed for that" there is always time. I want to be the person, a woman heard, read or saw and I positively changed her life. She took steps to free herself from her current conditions. She found some healing in my message and she went on to live her best life. I want to be known as one of the greatest inspirational leaders of our time. I show up so others can too. We don’t have to be living unhappy lives there is so much more happiness being in a state of love than misery. We just have to choose the state we want to be in. And I choose love everyday. I want to be the one that reminded you, you can do anything. You can have it all.
WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO INSPIRE WOMEN AROUND THE WORLD?
I would say it’s time to put yourself first sis. It is time to be selfish. To start with loving yourself so deeply you don’t allow anything or anyone to disrupt your peace. Because when we are truly happy from within, we are unstoppable. There is nothing that can get in our way of pursing our greatest desires, goals, dreams. There is no doubt to roadblock our success. So I would encourage them to take ownership of their lives by exploring their inner selves, and allow their truths to shine through. Throughout my journey, I have taken the steps to create a life, that is true to who I am, a life I was free from. A life I never felt trapped, where I couldn’t decide to do what was best for me and what I truly wanted to do. It meant putting myself first. And knowing I can have it all. So I encourage women to live their “best life” by not settling for anything that doesn’t serve them mentally and emotionally.
Through my own life’s journey, I have grown through many hardships, I have seen heartbreak. I have lived through the process of pain, surrendering, healing and rebuilding my life over and over again. Starting from scratch after I had built a life I worked so hard for. I let it People ask me what gives me strength and how do I keep showing up boldly go to find a greater life I knew was waiting for me. It was a in my vision? I would tell them to only do the things that make you happy. very hard decision but I found my peace and I found my This is where we are in flow, in alignment with our truest desires. When we freedom. I think women don’t realize the power of their operate from this place we can have it all because we are doing things that choice. To choose whatever it is they desire they can have. To never stay anywhere that goes against what your are aligned with our soul. Our energy is at a level where we call in that dream life. It is that simple. If it sits right with my energy I do it, if it doesn’t intuition is saying. My intuition has been my greatest I don’t. Because imagine when you are doing something you cannot stand? guide and I trust and listen to it every moment of the day. Leading me where I need to go. So trust your gut feeling, Trust me you will not be using all the tools within you to become the greatest you. Your energy will be divided and you will have opposing forces that is your truest self, guiding you to what is really good for you, guiding you to what you really want to do. And against you. when you do listen to it, be open to the path that is opening up for you, this is where the magic enters our So always think is this for my best good? Will this make me happy right lives. now. Not in the long run but right now, in this moment because that is all we ever have is this exact moment. Use it wisely to make decisions that best I also want to tell women that we are the most powerful SERVE YOU. So keep doing things that bring you joy, happiness, make you creatures. There is nothing that can break you when you feel good. Anything else toss it to the curb and stop giving it your energy find that strength within you. When you know you have and attention. survived everything life has thrown at you, you will keep With all that said, we are human and well I also leave room for growth and surviving. You must believe in that power you hold within I take a no “judgment zone” approach to everything. This means it’s okay if you because it will be you guiding force in this life to conquer everything. But you have to be willing to see it to you have made some mistakes along the way, hung on to something or believe it. someone too long. Stayed in a situation you know wasn’t in your best interest. Made decisions that went against your intuition. We have all been Lastly, there is nothing you cannot do, be or have in this there but what will set you apart from others is to find forgiveness in lifetime. There is nothing that is out of your reach. I don’t yourself. I think as women we hold ourselves to ridiculous standards of believe that there are chosen few that can have everything, perfection that there is no room for us to mess up or we have to be I believe we all have the ability to have whatever it is we so everything to everyone. It isn’t true. You have to be everything to yourself. desire. We all have the ability to be whatever our souls are So it means allowing mistakes but learning from them. To me, everything calling to us to become. We have everything within us to we go through, is something that helps us become a greater version of do it all, we just need to uncover it and let it guide us on ourselves and without the room for mistakes we don’t allow ourselves to our journey. evolve. At the same time, we need to know when to let go of the past and move on and this also means not letting us be victims to our circumstances but owning our stories and letting the healing of those stories empower us. So own your story don’t let your story own YOU!
SHOP WWW.KYRZCLOSET.COM WITH KYRZ’S CLOSET WE ARE ABLE TO PROVIDE FOR HER FAMILY AND KEEP HER LEGACY ALIVE.
