December 16, 2015 - Pittsburgh City Paper

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WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM | 12.16/12.23.2015 X PGHCITYPAPER XXXX PITTSBURGHCITYPAPER XX XX PGHCITYPAPER

MEET SOME OF THE ELVES BEHIND PGH’S TOY DRIVES 08

PRANTL’S BURNT ALMOND TORTE: ONE CAKE TO RULE THEM ALL 55


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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015


EVENTS 12.28 – 10am—5pm SPECIAL HOLIDAY HOURS The Warhol will be open on Monday, December 28, from 10am–5pm.

1.28 – 11am POP GENERATION For the generation that inspired Warhol, a new program exclusively for older adults, age 65 and over. Tickets $10/Free Members

1.30 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: EKMELES The Warhol entrance space Co-presented with the Music on the Edge series of the University of Pittsburgh Department of Music FREE parking in The Warhol lot Advance Tickets: $15/$10 students visit www.music.pitt.edu/tickets or call 412.624.7529

2.6 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: THE RED WESTERN The Warhol entrance space FREE parking in The Warhol lot Tickets $10/$8 Members & students

2.23 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: DISAPPEARS The Warhol theater FREE parking in The Warhol lot Tickets $15/$12 Members & students

GABI with special guest Sleep Experiments

NOW – 1.10 THE WARHOL: BOOK HUNT Find hidden books throughout the city for free admission passes and discounts. Visit warholbookhunt.com for details.

1.15 – 8pm The Warhol theater | Tickets $15 / $12 Members & students | visit www.warhol.org or call 412.237.8300

The Warhol welcomes adventurous vocalist and composer GABI (aka Gabrielle Herbst), to its intimate theater for an evening of ethereal, ambient, and otherworldly sounds. Herbst studied voice and composition with Zeena Parkins and Marina Rosenfeld, and her work has already been showcased at Robert Wilson’s Watermill Center, as well as Roulette, which in 2014 commissioned and premiered her first opera Bodiless. She is on tour supporting her debut album Sympathy, which was produced by Daniel Lopatin (Oneohtrix Point Never), and Paul Corley (Tim Hecker, Ben Frost). Pittsburgh’s own atmospheric, dream-pop trio Sleep Experiments opens the show.

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The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

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HOLIDAY CRAFT BEER 101

12.16/12.23.2015

C heck o ut the se fine Craft beers for yo ur Ho li day fun!

VOLUME 25 + ISSUE 50

{EDITORIAL} Editor CHARLIE DEITCH Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Music Editor MARGARET WELSH Associate Editor AL HOFF Multimedia Editor ASHLEY MURRAY Listings Editor CELINE ROBERTS Assistant Listings Editor ALEX GORDON Staff Writers RYAN DETO, REBECCA NUTTALL Staff Photographer HEATHER MULL Interns THEO SCHWARZ, ANDREW WOEHREL

{ART}

GE T TO KN OW

Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Production Director JULIE SKIDMORE Art Director LISA CUNNINGHAM Graphic Designers JEFF SCHRECKENGOST, JENNIFER TRIVELLI

{ADVERTISING} {COVER PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

[NEWS]

YO UR CR AF T BE ER

want her to be disappointed 08 “Iondon’t Christmas.” — Anonymous parent on why she utilized a local toy drive

[NEWS]

Great Lakes Eliot Ness Admittedly, it’s a bit of a paradox to name our Amber Lager for history’s most famous agent of prohibition. But it’s a smooth, malty (and dare we say, arresting?) paradox.

Magic Hat #9 Brewed clandestinely & given a name whose meaning is never revealed. Why #9? Why indeed. A sort of dry, crisp, refreshing, not quite pale ale, #9 is really i impossi ble to describe because there’s never been anything else quite like it.

is difficult, and we are 16 “Change committed to working with the community.” — URA Chairman Kevin Acklin on public pushback over Almono transit connector

[TASTE]

menu is augmented by monthly 22 “The specials that are interesting, seasonal and fun.” — Angelique Bamberg and Jason Roth review Nox’s Tavern and Grille

[MUSIC] rap, you’re good. You want other 26 “You people to hear you … where do you go?” — Rap artist Jasiri X on the absence of hip-hop performance spaces

[SCREEN] emotions are all as dry as their 34 “Their characters are wet.” — Harry Kloman reviews In the Heart of the Sea

Director of Advertising JESSIE AUMAN-BROCK Senior Account Executives TOM FAULS, PAUL KLATZKIN, SANDI MARTIN, JEREMY WITHERELL Advertising Representatives MATT HAHN, JEFF HRAPLA, SCOTT KLATZKIN, MELISSA LENIGAN, ERICA MATAYA, DANA MCHENRY, MELISSA METZ, JAMES PORCO Classified Manager ANDREA JAMES Radio Sales Manager CHRIS KOHAN National Advertising Representative VMG ADVERTISING 1.888.278.9866 OR 1.212.475.2529

{MARKETING+PROMOTIONS} Marketing Director DEANNA KONESNI Marketing Design Coordinator LINDSEY THOMPSON Marketing & Sales Assistant MARIA SNYDER Radio Promotions Director VICKI CAPOCCIONI-WOLFE Radio Promotions Assistants ANDREW BILINSKY, NOAH FLEMING

{ADMINISTRATION} Business Manager LAURA ANTONIO Circulation Director JIM LAVRINC Office Administrator RODNEY REGAN Technical Director PAUL CARROLL Interactive Media Manager CARLO LEO

{PUBLISHER} STEEL CITY MEDIA

woodchuck amber The first Woodchuck cider was crafted in a two-car garage back in 1991. The recipe remains the same today. Amber is a traditional cider boasting big red apple taste. Expertly crafted with a medium body, golden hue, and refreshing clean apple finish.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

l gunitas la Sucks Brown Shugga’ Substitute Ale. This beer is a ‘cereal m ley’ of barley, rye, med wheat, and oats. Full of complexishness from the 4 grains, then joyously dry-hopped for that big aroma and resinous flavor.

[ARTS] pieces form a thoughtful and 36 “These earnest meditation on love, home and the journey from the family that created you to the family that you create.” — Lissa Brennan on art exhibit At Home: Hetain Patel

[LAST PAGE]

are some people who have 55 “There moved away from Pittsburgh and they still want it.” — Prantl’s Bakery CEO Tom Medvitz on the popularity of the shop’s burnt almond torte

{REGULAR & SPECIAL FEATURES} CHEAP SEATS BY MIKE WYSOCKI 18 EVENTS LISTINGS 40 SAVAGE LOVE BY DAN SAVAGE 48 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY BY ROB BREZSNY 49 CROSSWORD BY BRENDAN EMMETT QUIGLEY 53

GENERAL POLICIES: Contents copyrighted 2015 by Steel City Media. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission of the publisher. The opinions expressed in Pittsburgh City Paper are those of the author and not necessarily of Steel City Media. LETTER POLICY: Letters, faxes or e-mails must be signed and include town and daytime phone number for confirmation. We may edit for length and clarity. DISTRIBUTION: Pittsburgh City Paper is published weekly by Steel City Media and is available free of charge at select distribution locations. One copy per reader; copies of past issues may be purchased for $3.00 each, payable in advance to Pittsburgh City Paper. FIRST CLASS MAIL SUBSCRIPTIONS: Available for $175 per year, $95 per half year. No refunds. PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 650 Smithfield Street, Suite 2200 Pittsburgh, PA 15222 412.316.3342 FAX: 412.316.3388 E-MAIL info@pghcitypaper.com www.pghcitypaper.com


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If we got you any closer, you would need a headset.

Getting to a Steelers game just got a whole lot easier. Tired of fighting traffic and searching for a parking space? Here’s a new option, take the T to Allegheny station. It’s just a first down from Heinz Field and a whole world of hurt away from the old way. The Red and Blue lines can get you there, and the Park and Ride lots are wide open. Take the T and see. For more information go to PortAuthority.org.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015


combine your

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Squirrel Hill • Wilkins Township • Wexford Plaza • South Hills Village • SouthSide Works • Mall at Robinson • Shadyside Norman Childs by Eyetique • Uptown • Cranberry Township • McMurray • Sewickley • Cleveland & Stow Ohio N E W S

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THIS WEEK

ONLINE

“I MIGHT HAVE TO RETIRE AND JUST DO THIS.”

www.pghcitypaper.com

Visit our website to see the faces and hear the voices of the real-life Santas behind local toy drives. Read the full feature at right.

Our Star Wars: The Force Awakens coverage goes live Friday at www.pghcitypaper.com.

This week: Go on a scavenger hunt, hear Etta Cox croon, and look through Teenie Harris’ lens. {PHOTO BY THEO SCHWARZ}

Bob Paganico, of the Spirit of Christmas, sits in his bar Bob’s Garage Restaurant and Lounge.

The podcast goes live every Thursday at www.pghcitypaper.com.

TOY Story

CITY PAPER

INTERACTIVE

O

City of Asylum, in the Mexican War Streets, offers colorful murals on its alleyway buildings. Here’s one that Instagrammer @popintopittsburgh captured. Tag your Instagram images as #CPReaderArt, and we just may re-gram you. Download our free app for a chance to win a Family Level Membership to the Carnegie Museums of Pittsburgh. Contest ends Dec. 31.

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N BLACK FRIDAY, an older man in a black-and-red-checked sweater is beside himself, flipping through a four-page Christmas list and literally checking it twice. Hanging his cane on the shopping cart, he hoists a box stuffed with 70 rolls of wrapping paper into it. He opens a roll of sticker gift-tags and begins writing names and sticking them on Pittsburghteam sports hoodies and talking Frozen Olaf dolls. He assures the clerk that he’ll pay for the opened gift tags; he just doesn’t want to forget whom he has in mind for each present. “Every year, energy comes all over me,” the man says. He’s Jimmy Cvetic, the retired county police detective and Vietnam veteran who founded the Western Pennsyl-

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

vania Police Athletic League. The gifts he’s tagging are for troubled teens he’s taken under his wing at his six boxing gyms, and for kids he’s met through his several other programs: a youth police academy, an autism-spectrum program,

Good Samaritans turn holiday toy drives into a seasonal industry {BY ASHLEY MURRAY} and his latest venture, Global Glorious Productions, a television show about a police officer who teaches lessons to kids. But these toys are just the start. There will be thousands more that he and an

army of local volunteers will purchase and wrap for kids they don’t even know. From the time kids are little, they are told about a jolly old guy in a red suit who will fulfill their wishes on Christmas morning. He will bring all the latest toys and gadgets — a promise that, in turn, puts immense pressure on parents to deliver. But maybe mom and dad, or whoever, just don’t make enough money to provide anything beyond the necessities. Maybe socioeconomic status — factors like income, education, race and ZIP code — has kept a family stressed. For those families, there isn’t just one Santa Claus, there are many real people — local government officials, churchgoers, law-enforcement personnel and small-


business owners — who want to make sure that every kid has something to smile about on Christmas. While big programs like Toys for Tots tout operations that reach seven million children in 700 communities nationwide, these folks are the cogs in the wheels of locally run Christmas toy drives. Their reasons for doing this vary — from community relations and business exposure to pure kindness. Regardless of motive, they have built a Christmas-toy-drive economy in Pittsburgh, and right now their business is in full swing.

The Santas

By 7:30 a.m. on a recent December morning, Javid Shojaie is already giving toydrive progress updates to a roomful of small-business owners who meet weekly for a networking breakfast. Shojaie, owner of Jaden’s Catering, in Monroeville, has a huge glass trailer filled with donated toys in his company’s parking lot on Route 22. The mustachioed businessman speaks earnestly. He and other members of the group spent several weekends decked out in Santa and elf suits to attract donations from cars driving past his place. “This year we raised over $7,400, and we are not done,” he tells the crowd. “We collected 38 bikes, over 100 pieces of clothing, gloves, hats, sweatshirts. It’s unbelievable how much people have donated. Yesterday I picked up 875 toys at 380 Auction House. The price for the toys was $2,800; he charged me $2000.” The Murrysville discount warehouse (where Cvetic went Black Friday shopping) has been cutting deals for the toy drive. Shojaie, a longtime friend of Cvetic’s, is a whirlwind in his own right. During his busiest season as a caterer, he’s hauling around vanloads of toys on a daily basis. Shojaie’s daughter Rachel, who is part of the family business, calls her father a “stand-up guy” who loves to give.

{PHOTO BY ASHLEY MURRAY}

Jimmy Cvetic looks at the piles of donated toys in the Global Glorious Productions Monroeville Mall Office.

So far, Shojaie has delivered more than 2,000 toys back to home base — Cvetic’s Global Glorious Productions office, in the Monroeville Mall. This year’s goal is to collect more than 4,000 toys.

TOYS FOR PITTSBURGH TIKES Jaden’s Catering, 4727 William Penn Highway, Monroeville. Deadline Fri., Dec. 18 (www.globalgloriousproductions.com)

Of the more than 50 members in Shojaie’s group, he says that 90 percent helped collect toys and money for the drive. The small businesses that get foot traffic brandished “Toys for Pittsburgh Tikes” donation boxes. (Cvetic, a gruff, oldschool guy whose poems are occasionally published in City Paper, used to call his program “Toys for Naughty Kids,” harking back to the bad-boy teenage types he trains in his gym, but he says “political correctness” caught up with him.)

“We [small businesses] are part of the community. They support you. You have to return that support,” Shojaie says. “A lady called me and wanted to know how to get on the list. I said there is no list. You just come see me. I walked her to the trailer, and she said, ‘I just want two toys for my kids and that’s it. This way they appreciate it.’ I begged her to take more.” While Cvetic’s business connections collect donations, he’s galvanized more than 30 police departments, numerous churches, social-service agencies and a federal judge to make lists of needy families they know. Police officer Greg Seman of North Braddock, one of the departments participating in the drive, said he could fill up his list “in probably five minutes.” “It’s hard because you want to impact the people who really need it the most, but that’s probably more than half of my community,” says Seman. Further north, another small-businessman is preparing for the Sat., Dec. 19, fundraiser for his toy drive. Bob Paganico, owner of Bob’s Garage Restaurant and Lounge in

O’Hara Township, says his place will be “jam-packed through the roof” for the annual Sausage Spectacular. Two hundred and fifty pounds of sausage will be grilled for sandwiches and sold for $4 each. “One hundred percent of money goes to the kids,” he says. Christmas spirit appears to be mandatory at Bob’s Garage. This small rectangular building on Freeport Road is covered wallto-wall, floor-to-ceiling in lights, garlands, stockings and ornaments; even a Christmas train goes ’round a track atop the bar. “He just loves to decorate for all the holidays. He was always that way,” says his wife, Trona. Their game room at home, she says, looks like this year-round. As he sips his coffee at the bar, Paganico, who wears gold-rimmed glasses and a gray goatee, explains that it all started in the ’70s, when his customers used to throw money into an upside-down umbrella. “When we’d get around the second week of December, we’d call an orphanage. They’d say we have a boy age 3, or age 5 to 8. We would just take that money and try to buy them what we thought they might like.” By 1987, Paganico and his good friend, Jim Johns, decided to create a nonprofit called The Spirit of Christmas. Between them, they serve kids on both sides of the Allegheny River — from Pitcairn to Sharpsburg. “We only had $15 per child to spend,” Paganico says in his low, gravelly voice. “Now we spend $50 per child, and each family gets a $50 gift certificate to Giant Eagle.” His eyes well up when he recalls stories of kids he’s given to over the years. “He’s a true Santa Claus,” his wife says. Before 9 a.m. on a recent weekday morning, Johns, a Monroeville city councilor, is already at the local Toys “R” Us. The middle-aged clerk, whom he calls “young lady,” pushes Avengers action figures, Learn and Groove Leap Frog musical CONTINUES ON PG. 10

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TOY STORY, CONTINUED FROM PG. 09

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{PHOTO BY THEO SCHWARZ}

The Toys for Pittsburgh Tikes donation trailer sits outside of Jaden’s Catering on Route 22 in Monroeville.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

tables, Elsa dolls from Disney, and Barbie “My daughter separates them accordin her Malibu convertible, among other ing to gender and age, and we put all them toys, across the scanner. toys in the back of Molly’s Trolley,” Johns Two buddies help him load a box truck says. “We’ll have Santa Claus on board. And outside; any toy that makes noise sings, them little kids know we’re comin’. They rings or dings as it’s loaded up. He checks come out of the woodwork. We give them out at $3,400. each whatever, and we always bring extra.” The short, white-haired, matter-of-fact He tells me: “Every child should have a guy points to a list from a community toy come Christmas time. And that’s what center. “They give me children’s ages, boys it’s all about, young lady.” or girls and what the children want. We try to get as close as we can.” Johns estimates that the nonprofit will spend about $20,000 this year. On a recent Sunday, it’s youth day at The bulk of the money is raised at a Ebenezer Missionary Baptist Church in the summer golf outing. They’ve even recruited Hill District. A group of young kids and the “voice of the Steelers,” Bill Hillgrove, as teenagers close the service by miming to their spokesperson. gospel music. “I have a bigger stage than I did when Brenda Tate, a longtime church memI was Billy Hillgrove in Garfield,” the ber, sits in her pew and counts the names legendary announcer says, about the on her list — 21. neighborhood where he grew up. She walks to the pulpit in her “That bigger stage gives me the Sunday best — fashionable opportunity to reach more leopard heels and a sharp tos Pittsburghers, and I hope black hat. “A gentleman See pho tions ecora d they respond.” in the community that is e th f o Garage Hillgrove spoke to City a retired police officer [is] at Bob’s w. at ww Paper at one of the orgaworking to make sure all aper pghcityp nization’s recent fundraisthe children in the commu.com ers, where people brought nities have some cheer for unwrapped gifts and bid on Christmas. Amen? All we need sports memorabilia. A Pittsburgh are the children’s names,” she says. Steelers ukulele (who knew they made The crowd answers “Amen.” such a thing?) went for $90. Johns emceed “I’m a son of the South, and in the black and called raffle-ticket numbers. communities we always had these sort of Of course the organization ends up with community matriarchs,” says Rev. Vincent extra toys beyond what has been request- Campbell, of Ebenezer. “Larger Pittsburgh ed. There’s a storage unit, Johns says, with knows Brenda as a police officer, but inside nearly 30 big garbage bags of surplus. On of the Hill District, everyone knows her as Christmas Eve, Johns, Paganico and their a community matriarch.” families, along with volunteers, deliver Tate, who retired from the Pittsburgh them to a low-income housing project not Police last year after four decades on the far from Oakmont. force, has lived in the same block of the Hill

The Families


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Retired Pittsburgh Police officer Brenda Tate separates toys for children from the Hill District community.

her entire life. In her final year as an officer, she requested her neighborhood beat. She says she prides herself on knowing her community in and out. “She has been this way as long as I’ve known her,” says Hill resident and Ebenezer member Clara Scott, who asked Tate to add her three granddaughters to the toydrive list. She says her family does what it can, but that her daughter is a single mother. “Brenda will do whatever she can do help someone.”

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS ANNUAL SAUSAGE SPECTACULAR Noon-6 p.m. Sat. Dec. 19, Bob’s Garage Restaurant and Lounge, 1372 Freeport Road, O’Hara Township (www.spirit-of-christmas.org)

By last week, Tate had submitted nearly 120 names to Cvetic. Meanwhile, federal judge Lisa Pupo Lenihan has asked parole officers to keep an eye out for parolees with kids who might need gifts and “to show their clients that they do care about their success as they reintegrate into society.” Christine Pritts is thankful for that. Pritts, who’s been under supervision since 2013 for her role in a Lawrence County meth-lab operation, has two little girls at home, ages 7 and 9. “I now live for them. I’m clean, I’m sober,” she says. “I work five days a week, I go to school, help them with their homework, take them to their games.” Pritts’ 7-year-old gave her a two-page Christmas list — Minions, Shopkins, Paw Patrol, etc. “I told her, ‘You have to narrow it down.

New Year’s Eve 2016

Santa cannot deliver all them toys or else he wouldn’t have enough toys for everyone else in the world,” she says. Pritts says she’s “scraped for” a soccer ball for her 9-year-old but says she’ll use the toy drive for a few supplemental items for her youngest. The growing piles of toys (not for sale) in the Global Glorious office also began piquing the curiosity of mall shoppers and passers-by. One evening last week, a young woman walked in and quietly asked, “Is this a toy drive?” After learning that she’s a single mom with a 4-year-old daughter, Cvetic reached for a small pink bike and handed it to her. She asked that her name not be published but told CP that her husband died this year doing research in Africa. They didn’t buy life insurance because “we were young and healthy,” but now everything is “on my shoulders.” “I don’t want her [my daughter] to be disappointed on Christmas, so this is truly a blessing,” she said.

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The Reason

Volunteers are now hurrying to wrap these thousands of toys before the Santas head out on Christmas Eve. “I was getting my son a Christmas gift, and I planned it so I [could] come here and help,” says Tina Jurick, who owns a cleaning company in Trafford and stopped by Global Glorious on a recent weeknight. “When you leave here, you feel good. It gives you a feeling that walking through the mall shopping is never going to give you.”

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CONTINUES ON PG. 12

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TOY STORY, CONTINUED FROM PG. 11

But with worries about a shrinking middle class and stagnant wages, why spend the resources and manpower on something as frivolous as a toy to avoid disappointment one morning of the year? After all, in the neighborhood where officer Seman will be delivering toys — North Braddock — the median household income is around $28,000. For some, it’s simply about giving. “Some say that it’s all commercialized,” says Rev. Campbell. “I don’t condemn or get on this ‘Let’s not commercialize Christmas or share gifts.’ I think people are looking for opportunities to do something for someone else because of what God has done for them.” His church is not only collecting names for toys, but is also collecting thousands in gift cards to select retailers for families in need. It is easy enough to get down on excessive Christmas spending. A Gallup poll reported in November that Americans will spend an average of $830 each on gifts. The

National Retail Federation forecasts holiday spending in the hundreds of billions. But it’s not easy for low-income parents who want to see their children ripping open presents on Dec. 25, like other kids in America get to do. “It’s not always about clothes or necessities. It’s the magic of getting that toy from Santa. We’re told since we’re little that Santa makes these toys and delivers them on that night,” says Pritts. Toy-drive volunteers acknowledged that they were tired. But none seemed ready to quit after this year. “I might have to retire and just do this,” Shojaie says jokingly. And while Paganico has slowed down considerably, Johns is still going strong. “I’ve been saying for a lot of years that ‘this is it, it’s too much work,’ and then you just get that one little kid that brings a tear to your eye, and that does it,” John says. “If it wouldn’t be for all the folks involved, there’s so many children that wouldn’t have a present under the tree.”

“EVERY CHILD SHOULD HAVE A TOY COME CHRISTMAS TIME. AND THAT’S WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT.”

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

Dec. 18 6 –10 pm

Celebrate rate the holidays in 1930s jazz style! Come ome dressed up, up ready to learn the foxtrot, foxtro foxtrot enjoy live jazz music, and explore holidaythemed science. /LYH PXVLF FDVK EDUV IRXU çRRUV RI H[KLELWV snacks available for purchase, science fun, and NO KIDS! CarnegieScienceCenter.org Cost: $10 in advance / $15 day of the event


Gymkhana’s famously fun Holiday Khids Kamps for 3-10 year olds! Our kampers experience a fun-filled variety of physical, social, and creative activities in our totally unique environment. Kamps are offered Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday 12/21—12/23 & 12/28-12/30. Activities will include Gymkhana’s fabulous preschool lesson plans, obstacle courses, parachute time, recreational games and activities, the zip line, the cargo net, crafts and more! Children must be potty trained!

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Bethel Park 412-833-6190

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Good Only At these participating Cricket Mobile Locations!

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EAST LIBERTY 5903 Penn Ave. 412-361-0666

McKEESPORT 222 5th Avenue 412-673-2920

PITTSBURGH 201 Smithfield Street 412-288-9947

SQUIRREL HILL 2301 Murray Avenue 412-422-6661

SHARPSBURG 920 Main Street 412-784-1043

MT. OLIVER 226 Brownsville Road 412-904-3120

CORAOPOLIS 1011 4th Ave 412-264-0144

PITTSBURGH MILLS MALL 590 PGH MILLS CIRCLE 724-904-7150

MILLVALE 210 Grant Avenue 412-821-4246

BROOKLINE 732 Brookline Blvd. 412-571-0700

BLOOMFIELD 4622 Liberty Avenue 412-802-6171

WESTMORLAND MALL 5256 US RT. 30 724-834-2395

WASHINGTON, PA 1025 Jefferson Ave. 724-222-9525

NATRONA HEIGHTS 2620 Freeport Road 724-895-3185

LAWRENCEVILLE 4213 Butler Street 412-682-0217

MONROEVILLE MALL 200 MALL CIRCLE DRIVE 724-858-5114

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DOWNTOWN 951 Liberty Avenue 412-434-6262

CRANBERRY 80 Regina Drive 814-493-8188

CRAFTON GROVE CITY 2350 Noblestown Road 157 South Broad Street 412-921-2004 724-264-4477

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DISCONNECTED Four Mile Run residents wary of transit connector between Oakland and Almono site {BY RYAN DETO} THE CITY’S Urban Redevelopment Authority may be getting a bit ahead of itself. In July, the URA applied for a state grant that would help fund a transit connector from Oakland to potential labs and tech centers at the Almono development site in Hazelwood and beyond. The project, which potentially could use driverless vehicles to shuttle riders, aims to foster “continued economic growth” between the two areas, according to the grant application. The problem is, however, that the URA forgot to ask the two small neighborhoods the shuttles would travel through if they minded. At a Dec. 7 community meeting in the Four Mile Run section of Greenfield, however, one thing became clear: They mind very much. “I am vehemently opposed to this project,” says Tom D’Andrea, a lifelong Four Mile Run resident whose home is right on the proposed transit loop. “If I saw all the things our neighborhood needs directly impacted, it might be different, but I don’t see how that is possible.” D’Andrea says residents aren’t very interested in a shuttle bus and would rather see some of the community benefits they have been requesting. He says neighborhood roads have not been paved in decades, blighted properties have not been addressed, and no action has been taken to mitigate problems with stormwater runoff. (In 2009, the neighborhood

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Four Mile Run resident Tom D’Andrea stands near the southern entrance of the Junction Hollow Trail, where the proposed shuttles will run through.

experienced a devastating flood.) Pittsburgh City Councilor Corey O’Connor says the process to include community input has just begun. He says consultants have been hired to go doorto-door to the residents of all affected neighborhoods, including Hazelwood and Oakland. However, O’Connor says his office found out about the pre-community-input grant application from an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette and that the city made a “mistake” in not reaching out beforehand. Pittsburgh Planning Director Ray Gastil agrees and says, “we probably should have been out here earlier.” Kevin Acklin, URA chairman and Mayor Bill Peduto’s chief of staff, says

“I AM VEHEMENTLY OPPOSED TO THIS PROJECT.”

that the URA didn’t have time to receive community input before applying in July. However, when asked by City Paper when the idea for the transit connecter first materialized, Acklin couldn’t specify and said the date when the idea first came up was a little “irrelevant” because the city was always going to reach out to the community after applying for the grant. Acklin also reinforced that community engagement is just beginning and nothing is set in stone. “This is the beginning, it is the front end of this process,” says Acklin. “Change is difficult, and we are committed to working with the community. … No hard decisions have been made about the final road.” But it is unclear how much the city can do to address residents’ requests. Funds from the grant, if it’s awarded, can only be used for transit and development

enhancements related to the potential connector, according to the grant’s guidelines. So, a multi-million-dollar project to address Four Mile Run’s flooding problems can’t be incorporated. However, Chris Sandvig, from the Pittsburgh Community Redevelopment Group, says awarded grants can have a chain-reaction effect that makes other grants in the area more attractive. “Now that a potential transit project is there, it could make solving the stormwater issue more tangible,” he says. But, the city also has work to do convincing Four Mile Run residents how the project will specifically benefit them. Many of the 50 residents at the meeting said they wouldn’t use the shuttles, with some saying they usually walk the mileplus to the attractions in Oakland. D’Andrea’s wife, Christine, believes the transit loop would attract drivers wanting to avoid paying for parking in Oakland, who will park in the Run for free and take the shuttle to their jobs. But Gastil adds that the shuttle line could encourage people to not use their cars to go to work and that residents who live in Oakland, the Run and Hazelwood could potentially do this via the transit connector. Acklin says this connection could potentially link the affected neighborhoods to a city-wide connection at the East Busway, while avoiding the potential widening of Second Avenue to six lanes to accommodate development. Acklin says the city “heard loud and clear” the concerns of the residents, and the city will be back soon to see if they can address some of them. But he also encourages residents to work on a compromise that can help the potential growth of Pittsburgh. “Just because things are how they are does not mean they don’t have to change,” says Acklin. “We are an evolving city. We can’t just sit idly by and not take advantage of this new economy.” RYA N D E TO@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

#filter412 Christmas Eve Candlelight Services with Dr. Kurt Bjorklund Friday, Dec. 18, 7:00 pm Saturday, Dec. 19, 5:00 & 7:00 pm Sunday, Dec. 20, 3:00 pm

Tuesday, Dec. 22, 7:00 pm Wednesday, Dec. 23, 7:00 & 9:00 pm Thursday, Dec. 24, 11:00 am; 1:00, 3:00, 5:00, 7:00 & 9:00 pm

2551 Brandt School Road, Wexford, PA 15090 www.orchardhillchurch.com 724.935.5555

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

original iPhone art by City Paper photographer Heather Mull

pghcitypaper


November 27, 2015–January 11, 2016 Looking for ways to enjoy the holidays with a special someone, your family, or out-of-town guests? Celebrate the season in one of Pittsburgh's most majestic spaces. And while you’re here, why not cross some items off of your holiday shopping list? Gifts from the CMOA Design Store and CMNH Store are sure to delight. Neapolitan Presepio November 27–January 11

Holidays at the Museums is sponsored by

Carnegie Trees: Holidays in the Highlands December 3–January 11

carnegiemnh.org | cmoa.org | 412.622.3131 |

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one of the four carnegie museums of pittsburgh

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[THE CHEAP SEATS]

Extra Holiday Savings!

ICE PICK {BY MIKE WYSOCKI} WITH APOLOGIES TO no-good street punks

John Anthony Jewelers, trusted wholesale buyers since 1979, is offering their entire inventory RI ßQH MHZHOU\ IRU VDOH WR WKH SXEOLF before selling to dealers.

70

EVERYTHING AT, NEAR OR BELOW COST!

OFF

Retail Prices On Selected Merchandise

Off

Sale le Prices

Expires Thursday, December 24, 2015

On Selected Fine Jewelry

CLARK BUILDING, SUITE 315 717 LIBERTY AVENUE • PITTSBURGH 412-261-0407 • M-F 9AM-5PM • SAT 9AM-4PM Allll Major Major Credit C Cards and Layaways Accepted • Discounts Off Original Retail / Suggested d Retailil Prices

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

and biker gangs everywhere, no one is tougher than a hockey player. Hockey is a game played on a solid sheet of ice with 24 razor-thin blades flying around at insane speeds. Throw in big wooden sticks and a frozen vulcanized-rubber puck, and you have a game that is not for the weak. In 1996, Chatham University became the first college in Pennsylvania to put together an NCAA women’s hockey team. Pittsburgh is a city full of tough guys, especially those dudes that wear shorts in the winter, but few are tougher than the intelligent young women on this team. Six times a week, these athletes are on the ice playing or practicing. While most college students spend their weekends dabbling in borderline illegal activities, these women are playing hockey. Head coach Jason Evans, a product of Robert Morris University and Carrick High School, is beginning his fifth season at the helm of the Chatham Cougars. This team has players from Alaska, North Carolina, Missouri and, as you may expect, Canada. Hell, Karlee Kaufman comes all the way from Mars (Pa., which isn’t actually that far except when traffic sucks). The former Fightin’ Planet high school product is one of two local stars, alongside Kelsey Stanton from Cannon-Mac in Washington, Pa. Last season the Cougars just missed the Eastern College Athletic Conference West playoffs by one point. This year the team opened the season with back-to-back games against the defending champion, Plattsburgh (yes, with an “h” on the end) Cardinals. Game one was a tough 4-0 defeat. Goalie Sydney Isbell, from Thunder Bay, Ontario, managed to stop 38 of the 42 shots that the champs peppered at her. It was still better than the second game, which the Cougars lost 8-0. Plattsburgh State (I hate them so much) is the school that gave us actor Tim Robbins and disgraced former politician/ dick-pic aficionado Anthony Weiner. Its other claim to fame is that Peter Frampton recorded his live version of “Do You Feel Like We Do” there. Surprisingly, the talking guitar of the future never caught on for some reason. But none of Platts-

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Mike Wysocki

burgh’s “rich history” can match Chatham, which gave the world Rachel Carson. Carson was a conservationist and marine biologist who is credited with starting the worldwide environmental movement by making people aware of harmful pesticides. She has been awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the highest honor a U.S. civilian can obtain. Plus, a hiking trail and bridge in Pittsburgh, and numerous schools are named after her. She is arguably the most famous woman from Pittsburgh this side of Gertrude Stein and Christina Aguilera. Since a tough start to the season, though, the Cougars have won three of their last six games. Chatham traveled to Geneva, N.Y. for its last game and took the second game of the series against William Smith College. A 6-2 victory over Big Willie Style (as I now call that school) moved its record to 3-6. Down 2-0 early, the Cougars rallied for the tie followed by Katrina Hawkins’ first goal of the year. A powerplay goal from Jenny Jones put them ahead for good. Kaufman then ripped a blue-line screamer to net her second career goal. The team effort was backed by Kasandra Petersen, who stopped 23 of 25 shots. Chatham plays games almost every weekend, all back-to-back on Fridays and Saturdays. Next month, they host Oswego at 5 p.m. on Jan. 15, followed by a 3 p.m. Saturday tilt. On Jan. 22 and 23, Elmira comes to town. All the games are in Harmarville at the Alpha Ice Complex, and all the seats are just as we like them — good and cheap. Go out and support Chatham Cougars hockey. These women are smarter and tougher than you or me, especially me.

PITTSBURGH IS A CITY FULL OF TOUGH GUYS, ESPECIALLY THOSE DUDES THAT WEAR SHORTS IN THE WINTER.

MIK E WYSO C K I IS A STANDU P C O ME DIAN AND M E M B E R OF J I M K RE N N ’ S Q M ORN I N G S H OW E AC H WE E K DAY MO R NING O N Q 9 2 . 9 F M. F O L L OW H I M ON T W I T T E R: @ I T S M I K E W YS OC K I


be [ CHRISTMAS ] We invite you to celebrate this Christmas Eve with North Way Christian Community: a celebration of Jesus’ birth with music, a special Kidz moment, live teaching and Silent Night by candlelight. The Christmas Eve Services are family friendly; childcare is available for infants through five years of age. Oakland: 11am & 3pm Thurs., Dec. 24 428 N. Craig St. Pgh., PA 15213

East End: 1pm Thurs., Dec. 24 5941 Penn Ave. Pgh., PA 15206

Winter Weather Accessories are Great Gifts for the Holiday Season!

northway.org/Christmas

SUBARU ROADSIDE EMERGENCY KIT

SUBARU REMOTE ENGINE STARTER

SUBARU ALL WEATHER FLOOR MATS

SUBARU SEVERE WEATHER KIT

$10

Happy Holidays from Day Subaru! Use this $10 Gift Certificate on Anything! Get great cold weather holiday gifts and more!

Animal 2310 W LIBERTY AVE | PITTSBURGH, PA 15226 | 412-343-1600 WWW.WESTLIBERTYSUBARU.COM N E W S

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Party Like It’s 1989! New Year’s Eve Package: • Deluxe Room for Two • Tickets to Party in Our Ballroom with 80’s Cover Band, Velveeta. Doors Open at 8 p.m.

Only

Four Courses & Champagne Toast $49 - $89 1200 GRANDVIEW AVE | MT. WASHINGTON | 412-381-1919 | VUE412.COM/EVENTS

FEATURING THE WAILERS

• Champagne Toast at Midnight with Hats and Noisemakers • Breakfast for Two the Next Day

$

New Year’s Eve with a View!

199

Tickets for Ballroom Party only are $25.00 and available at our front desk or by calling 412-682-6200

THURSDAY

DECEMBER 31 6PM-MIDNIGHT PITTSBURGH’S

Call Robert at 412-682-6259 or email at robruggeman@wyndham.com (Discounts available for parties of 10 or more)

wyndhampittsburghuniversitycenter.com 20

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

PARTY

IN THE CULTURAL DISTRICT

TRUSTARTS.ORG/FIRSTNIGHTPGH


Meet. Eat. Repeat.

8pm - $75 BAKN FAVORITES | 3 DRINK TICKETS CHAMPAGNE AT MIDNIGHT LIVE MUSIC | FAVORS WWW.SHOWCLIX.COM/EVENT/BAKN-NEW-YEARS-EVE-PARTY

335 E. MAIN STREET

CARNEGIE, PA 412.275.3637

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DE

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ON

NOX’S EARNS ITS PIN ON THE MAP OF LOCAL GASTROPUBS

PBJ ME

{BY REBECCA NUTTALL} For sister-and-brother team Lauren and Chris Firman — along with probably most people — peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches carry a lot of nostalgia. “We grew up on peanut-butterand-jelly everything,” says Lauren. “As kids we loved to screw around by adding things like cookie crumbles or making double-decker sandwiches.” Those childhood creations inspired Peanut Butter Jelly Time, a new Bloomfield restaurant specializing in PB&J sandwiches and offering childhood favorites like Dirt (crushed Oreos), and Ants on a Log: celery sticks stuffed with peanut butter and topped with raisins. Spreads include various jellies, smooth and crunchy peanut butter, Nutella and marshmallow fluff. The owners’ own favorites currently include the Waffle not so Sundae, a Belgian waffle with graham-cracker spread, strawberries, bananas and a scoop of cinnamon-bun ice cream; and The Elvis, a grilled peanut-butter sandwich with bananas, honey and bacon. Perhaps the most unusual item is sushi rolls. Varieties include Spicy Crunchy Peanut, with crunchy peanut butter on wheat bread with red jalapeño jelly and sriracha. “We tried to come up with all kinds of weird stuff to keep it interesting, and that’s what you see here,” says Chris. Trendy theme aside, Peanut Butter Jelly Time has a neighborhood feel. Many ingredients are locally sourced, and after only two weeks the place has two regulars who visit every morning for coffee. “This neighborhood is so welcoming,” says Lauren. “Everybody loves the concept. They think it’s so adorable.” RNUTTALL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

4709 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. 412-622-0225 or www.pbjpgh.com

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FEED

Drink seasonally, drink locally. This year, swap out the brandy in n your eggnog g for some e Wigle bourbon. n.

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{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Wings at Nox’s Tavern and Grille

CLASSIC EATS {BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

T

HE NAME ALONE of the borough

of Blawnox has an interesting history. Two hundred years ago, it was called Hoboken. But the Blaw Steel Company’s acquisition of the Knox Welded and Pressed Steel Company created an entity so mighty, it effectively became synonymous with the town. In 1917, Hoboken became Blawnox in name as well as in workforce, with the “k” dropped for clarity. The name has been abbreviated even further in the nomenclature of Nox’s Tavern and Grille. A sly cartoon fox, incorporated into the logo, not only rhymes, but signifies the mascot of the Fox Chapel school district, which the borough’s children attend. The name is punny, too. The establishment’s website

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

proclaims, “Welcome to Nox’s … where we strive to be ‘Nox your ordinary tavern.’” Nox’s strives, and it succeeds. Just one of the ways in which it’s not an ordinary tavern: Nox’s is owned and run by a pair

NOX’S TAVERN AND GRILLE 720 Blaw Ave., Blawnox. 412-794-8233 HOURS: Mon.-Fri. 11 a.m.-2 a.m.; Sat.-Sun. noon-2 a.m. PRICES: $3-12 LIQUOR: Full bar

CP APPROVED of women, industry veterans Brittany Schaffer and Jennifer Carrozza, who took over a former corner bar a block off the main drag last year. It’s small in size — just

one room, plus an enclosed outdoor patio — and clad in corrugated steel, with stainless-steel tabletops for a vibe that’s both nononsense industrial and frankly modern. Other than that, Nox’s isn’t working any theme other than good food and drink. Nox’s menu is short and simple, focused on wings and burgers, a.k.a. “steamers” — more on those in a minute — and augmented by monthly specials that are interesting, seasonal and fun. For instance, during November you can enjoy a burger with stuffing and gravy, or the Thank-Roll, an egg roll with Thanksgiving dinner rolled up inside, served, of course, with gravy for dipping. We thought the Thank-Roll was pretty great. Mashed potatoes and stuffing together approached starch overkill, but


bright, firm kernels of corn offered textural variety and the wrapper was beautifully cooked. Our only complaint was that the turkey seemed scant in the filling. But in bites where it played forward, the roll really did taste like a complete dinner, and the gravy was a star. Non-homemade gravies tend to taste strongly of artificial flavor, what honest flavor they have compromised by thickener. Nox’s gravy was plenty thick, maybe even too much so, but we loved that its true turkey flavor came through. Another seasonal sandwich, the turkey melt, highlighted the kind of wonderful lunches and light dinners that can be made with leftover Thanksgiving turkey. Here, bacon upped the savory ante, melted provolone slathered the meat with creamy richness, and sriracha mayo added a welcome jolt of piquancy in this tasty update of a club sandwich. Pulled pork on a Kaiser roll was another superb sandwich. Some of the pork was finely shredded, but hearty chunks among the shreds were the hallmark of a hand-pulled shoulder. The barbecue sauce was sweet, but had some kick as well, deftly countered by the creamy cole slaw on top. Burgers at Nox’s are called “steamers,” like the steamed patties that are treasured traditional specialties at some Connecticut diners. Steaming usually works best with smaller patties, but Nox’s are a full eight ounces. Ours was superjuicy, but despite its clean, beefy flavor, we ultimately still missed the charred, seared crust of a griddled burger. On the side, housemade potato chips were thick, hearty and delicious. Such thick chips often burn or are unevenly cooked, but these were uniform and satisfying. Nox’s has a long and interesting list of wing flavors. We went safe with the house sauce, as well as adventurous with the special sage-lemon-honeybutter option. The wings were on the small side, and so not very meaty. But they had a great crispy crust, the better to support the sauces. House sauce would be best described as a lighter version of classic buffalo sauce, not exactly spicy but plenty zingy. The sagehoney-lemon-butter sauce was too heavy on the sweet, syrupy honey for our tastes; bright lemon and aromatic sage were almost canceled out. Nox’s Tavern and Grille is a modern update on the mill workers’ corner bar in the former steel town of Blawnox. With its contemporary decor and thoughtful menu of well-prepared sandwiches, steamers and seasonal specials, Nox’s earns its pin on the map of local gastropubs. INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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On the RoCKs

Thank you City Paper readers for voting us one of the Best Chinese Restaurants in Pittsburgh

{BY CELINE ROBERTS}

GRAPE HAVEN

China Palace Shadyside

Bar is a home away from home for an Italian winery Strolling the aisles at Market St. Grocery a few months ago, I salivated over fancy olive oils and cheeses, while throwing amorous glances toward the prepared foods. Then I saw the Wine Bar and bee-lined for a stool. After what I can only describe as a wholly delightful back-and-forth with self-described “wine woman” Jill Weprich, sampling a few different and all-around tasty wines, I celebrated finding a new after-work spot. Then the bill came and my celebration began in earnest. “The way our system works is quality high, price point low,” says beverage director Ray Matthews. This is possible because the brightly lit, 25-seat bar is the leased outpost of Collefrisio, a winery in Abruzzo, Italy, and sells only its own wines. The establishment holds a limited winery license, the only one in Pennsylvania for a winery not located in-state. And it’s open after the grocery closes, until 11 p.m. most days, and until 9 p.m. Sundays.

Featuring cuisine in the style of

Peking, Hunan, Szechuan and Mandarin

100 VEGETARIAN

TACDOAY!

ES TU/

Food & Drink Specials!

DISHES!

Delivery Hours

11:30 - 2 pm and 5-10pm

1000 Sutherland Dr. Pittsburgh, PA 15205 412-787-8888 www.plazaazteca.com

5440 Walnut Street, Shadyside 412-687-RICE chinapalace-shadyside.com

“WE JUST MANAGE IT FOR THEM BECAUSE THEY’RE IN ITALY, MAKING THE WINE.” The bar is essentially a piece of Italy: the wine room for a vineyard thousands of miles away. “We just manage it for them because they’re in Italy, making the wine,” says Market St. Grocery owner David Priselac. The partnership began when an importer who’d sold some Collefrisio to the state stores, as a Chairman’s Select wine, contacted Priselac. The wine bar is now the vineyard’s main U.S. seller, with only a few other shops in New York carrying bottles. Collefrisio is sold in 52 other countries. Located right on the Adriatic Sea, the winery encompasses several vineyards, and produces about a dozen wines, including two sparklers and a rosé. With a heavy lean toward using Montepulciano grapes and vines that are between 15 and 60 years old, the winery produces a wide variety of wines. As the seasons change and business grows, so will the offerings at Market St. Whether you’re having a glass, grabbing a bottle to go, or committing to a case, this wine bar satisfies. CELINE@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

435 Market St., Downtown. www.marketstreetgrocery.com

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OPEN CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR’S DAY

THE FOLLOWING DINING LISTINGS ARE RESTAURANTS RECOMMENDED BY CITY PAPER FOOD CRITICS

DINING LISTINGS KEY J = Cheap K = Night Out L = Splurge E = Alcohol Served F = BYOB

Asian American Cuisine

Serving Breakfast & Lunch

The Largest Buffet in Town! Now Hiring d DownloaP our AP today!

Over 200 Specialty Items: Roast Beef, Ham, Baked Salmon, Ribs and Seafood Casserole

Dessert Bar Banquets of 20-200 Guests 412- 481-1118 860 Saw Mill Run Blvd. ( Rte. 51S) Minutes from Downtown, Close to the Liberty Tunnel Next to the Red, White & Blue Store

www.oldtownbuffetpgh.com

Did you you know kn k now ow we we offer o offer... ffer • B Bre Br Breakfast reak eakf eakf akfast kffast ast A ast All lll Day Day • Vegetarian Options • Gluten-Free • Preservative Free • Sausage & Angus Beef • Locally Home-Grown Vegetables • And so much more 1718 Mt. Royal Blvd Mt. Royal Plaza | GLENSHAW Next to Shaler Middle School

www.colecafe.com (412) 486-5513

BENJAMIN’S WESTERN AVENUE BURGER BAR

bar • billiards • burgers

Hora Feliz

MONDAY & THURSDAY $2 Yuengling 16oz Draft ____________________ TUESDAY 1/2 Price Wine by the Bottle ____________________ WEDNESDAY Pork & Pounder $10 ____________________ FRIDAY Sangria $3 ____________________ SATURDAY & SUNDAY 10:30am-3pm

(Happy Hour) every Monday thru Friday from 5-7 PM. • 1/2 Off Draft Beers • $1 Off Bottled Beers • $2 Off Margaritas • “Beer of the Day” specials and Nacho specials.

Brunch Specials & Bloody Mary Bar

----- HAPPY HOUR ----1/2 OFF SNACKS $2 OFF DRAFTS $5 WINE FEATURE

Mon- Fri 4:30 – 6:30pm

2031 Penn Ave. (at 21 ) • 412.904.1242 st

@casareynamex 24

now open 7 days a week!

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

900 Western Ave. North side 412-224-2163

BenjaminsPgh.com

1844 RESTAURANT. 690 State Route 66, Leechburg. 724-845-1844. This restored 19th-century farmhouse offers a classic fine-dining menu with intriguing updates suited to 21st-century tastes. Thus, prime rib sits alongside tempura shrimp with orange cayenne, cucumbers and bleu cheese, and the stalwart shrimp cocktail is now dressed with sofrito lemon sauce. LE BISTRO 19. 711 Washington Road, Mount Lebanon. 412-306-1919. Bistro 19 fits within the upper echelon of the region’s dining scene, while keeping its cozy neighborhood feel. It offers a broad range of surf and turf, pastas and poultry. Its inventive preparations, and the kitchen’s attention to detail, make even now-familiar items such as pot-stickers and flatbreads exciting. LE EL BURRO COMEDOR. 1108 Federal St., North Side. 412-904-3451.A casual Southern California-style taqueria offers a variety of tacos, burritos and Cal-Mex specialties, such as carne asada fries, Tijuana dogs and chilaquiles (a homey casserole). Tacos are come with a variety of fillings, including mahi mahi and shrimp, and burrito fillings run from standard to breakfast and French fries and steak. JF

Poor Richard’s Wexford Alehouse {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} focused on pastas and seafood, with very little in the way of red-sauce standards or the Northern Italian clichés of the ’80s. Salads are big enough to share, pasta is made in house, and in season, there is a charming outdoor patio. LE THE MINTT. 3033 Banksville Road, Banksville. 412-306-1831. This casual eatery successfully taps the multicultural cuisines of India’s eastern coast, with dishes such as gongura chicken and mutton biryani. Other regions are also represented with dosas, curries and tandoori specialties. For an appetizer, try Chicken 555, dressed with peanuts, curry leaves and a traditional pickle. KF

HOKKAIDO SEAFOOD BUFFET. 4536 Browns Hill Road, Squirrel Hill. 412-421-1422. This buffetstyle restaurant rises above the scourge of the steam table to offer some true gems among its panoply of East Asian offerings. There’s standard ChineseAmerican fare, but also sushi, hibachi-style Japanese cooked to order, popular offerings such as crab legs and roast Peking duck, and even frog legs. KF ISTANBUL SOFRA. 7600 Forbes Ave., Regent Square. 412-727-6693. This restaurant offers a variety of Turkish specialties, from appetizers (falafel, mucver zucchini cakes) and bean salads to grilled meats (lamb, chicken). Try the Adana kebab, made of spiced ground meat, smoked Turkish peppers and sumac, or the small but worthy vegetarian section of falafel, grilled vegetables and manti dumplings. KF LUCCA. 317 S. Craig St., Oakland. 412-682-3310. This long-standing Oakland restaurant features an updated, pan-Italian selection

NAYA. 2018 Murray Ave., Squirrel Hill. 412-421-1920. At this storefront restaurant, diners can explore the depths of Syrian cuisine as well as a few Middle Eastern favorites, such baba ghanoush. Among the entrees: samaka harrah (“spicy Syrian fish”), shawarma served with rice pilaf, and lamb in a fruit sauce paired with mashed potatoes. KF NINE ON NINE. 900 Penn Ave., Downtown. 412-338-6463. This elegant restaurant and lounge offers a maturation of contemporary American cuisine, effortlessly shifting from refined Continental to Asian fusion to ingredient-focused invention. Instead of showy creations, the kitchen produces dishes that instantly seem right, such as miso cod or thymeroasted Amish chicken with asparagus flan. LE OISHII BENTO. 119 Oakland Ave., Oakland. 412-687-3335. Bamboo walls and a low counter with colorful cloth cubes for seating denote a place for moderately priced Japanese food, including sushi. Oishii also adds a few Korean dishes for variety and spice; those seeking a little heat might consider bulgogi, the Korean BBQ. JF

The Porch {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} MONTEREY PUB. 1227 Monterey St., North Side. 412-322-6535. A welcoming neighborhood bar with a menu of classic pub grub and Irish standards (such as “bangers and mash”) But there is also the occasional Asian flourish or unexpected ingredient mash-up, such as Thai red curry wings, fried green beans, an Irish-Cuban sandwich and a BLT with salmon. JE

PITTSBURGH THAI RESTAURANT BY BORIS. 321 South Ave., Verona. 412-828-0339. Expect to find with the standard array of Thai curries, noodle dishes and stir fries, with more unusual offerings tucked away under “Specialties” and “Chef’s Specials.” Appetizers include corn fritters and steamed dumplings, and among the less-common entrees are tropical bird’s nest (with a shredded potato base) and tamarind tofu. KF


1844 Restaurant {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} POOR RICHARD’S WEXFORD ALEHOUSE. 10501 Perry Highway, Wexford. 724-935-9870. This bar and restaurant delivers top-notch pub grub, plus a wellcurated beer menu. Among the offerings: the Buffalo, N.Y. classic sandwich, roast beef on weck, a Germanic roll with caraway seeds; and mac-and-cheese, made with Buffalo hot sauce. Well-prepared burgers, wings, fish and chips, and sandwiches round out the menu. KE THE PORCH. Schenley Plaza, Forbes Avenue and Schenley Drive, Oakland. 412-687-6724. An attractive wood-and-stone structure set in the verdant heart of Oakland, The Porch offers cuisine that is modern without being stark, homey without being heavy. Consider a pizza dressed with butternut squash, pork belly atop roasted pumpkin, or lasagne with housemade chive pasta. KE

with a thoughtful selection of internationally inflected classics like chipotle barbecue pork tenderloin and blackened chicken alfredo. Artisanal touches like a side dish of “chef’s grains” complete the picture. KE SAUSALIDO. 4621 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. 412-683-4575. Casual elegance is the byword at this neighborhood venue, where the fare is inspired by Northern California cuisine, with seasonal ingredients combined into New American and Continental dishes. The preparations vary widely, from ultra-traditional offerings like crab-stuffed shrimp to au courant updates like duck with orangeapricot balsamic glaze. LF

SEWICKLEY SPEAKEASY. 17 Ohio River Blvd., Sewickley. 412-741-1918. This little restaurant has the charm of a bygone era and old-fashioned food PROPER BRICK OVEN whose pleasures are AND TAP ROOM. worth rediscovering. www. per a p 139 Seventh St., The Continental menu pghcitym o .c Downtown. 412-281offers chestnuts like duck 5700. This cozy Downtown á l’orange and Virginia spot offers a menu of snacks, spots, as well as more pizzas and pastas, but strives distinctive dishes, such as to be about as refined as that tournedos dijon bleu and French workmanlike trinity can be. Acadian porterhouse. LE Some cheeses and pasta are housemade, and many starters TAVERN 245. 245 Fourth Ave., are closer to tapas or antipasti Downtown. 412-281-4345. than to pub grub. More than Step into this Downtown fancy30 beers are on tap, as well. KE casual pub, with smart looks and tasty, updated bar fare. “The THE PUB CHIP SHOP. 1830 E. Farm” entree featured sliders Carson St., South Side. 412-381made with chicken, pulled BBQ 2447. This storefront venue offers pork and steak fillet, on a potato British-style quick fare, from fish roll with red pepper and goat and chips and meat pies, to doner cheese. The fried calamari come kebabs and pasties. Pastry pies with a basil-garlic aioli, and the include traditional (meat, Stilton) robust Yuengling beer-cheese but also more modern fillings like sauce was the perfect complement chicken curry and vegan vindaloo. to “Pittsburgh potatoes.” JE Beer-battered haddock pairs well with housemade sauces and thick TEPPANYAKI KYOTO. 5808 fresh-cut fries. JF Bryant St., Highland Park. 412-441-1610. This Japanese THE RED RING. 1015 Forbes restaurant offers fare drawn Ave., Uptown. 412-396-3550. from the menus of lunch counters, This Duquesne University venue train stations and family kitchens. is a decided cut above student From salads containing burdock dining. The dining room is root and rice balls to cabbage spacious, with a handsome pancakes and stir-fried noodles, fieldstone bar. The fare is this diner-style venue lets casual contemporary American cuisine, eaters expand beyond sushi. KE

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LOCAL

“IT’S A MORE DIFFICULT LANDSCAPE TO GET OUT OF NOW THAN IT WAS.”

BEAT

{BY ALEX GORDON}

NEW THRILLS

ALEXGORDON@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

PUNCHLINE RECORD-RELEASE SHOW with NEVADA COLOR, MACE BALLARD. 8 p.m. Fri., Dec. 18. Altar Bar, 1620 Penn Ave., Strip District. $15-20. 412-206-9719 or www.thealtarbar.com

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On the heels of Wiz Khalifa and Mac Miller, Pittsburgh hip hop faces a cloudy future Chris Fafalios (left) and Steve Soboslai {PHOTO COURTESY OF JORDAN TOMB}

Ask Punchline’s Steve Soboslai and Chris Fafalios if they considered a new band name for their surprisingly clean, pop-driven new record Thrilled, and the answer comes quickly: “Absolutely not.” “Punchline is us,” says Soboslai, the guitarist and lead singer since the bands’ inception in 1997. “We’re us, and our songs are us, so it should still be perceived as us.” For almost two decades, Punchline has consistently released catchy, energetic, patently sincere albums in the realm of “pop punk” — if you’re into that sort of label, which, as you might imagine, Soboslai and Fafalios are not. With Thrilled, the Pittsburgh-bred band continues in that vein, minus a little distortion, with a few electronic elements added in. There were no preconceptions for a new sound, no grand design for a rebrand. “We just chose the 10 best ideas we liked at the time and recorded them,” says Soboslai. “They are what they are.” This Friday, Punchline returns to Pittsburgh at the Altar Bar for its first hometown show since 2013. The line-up features original drummer Cory Muro and new guest guitarist Trevor Leonard, and a set list spanning the band’s whole career, says Fafalios. Punchline is still Punchline, but Thrilled does offer some firsts. It’s the band’s first release on InVogue Records, as well as the first written solely by Fafalios and Soboslai, after the departure of guitarist Paul Menotiades and Muro after 2012’s So Nice to Meet You. With Soboslai now living in Nashville and Fafalios in Belle Vernon, many of the songs were written remotely, with the duo exchanging ideas over email. “Steve would tell me, ‘Here’s the BPM for this song and here’s the key for this song, just send me whatever you come up with,’” says Fafalios. “One of our songs on the new album, it just fit perfectly.” That song was the energetic single “No Stopping Us,” which features Fafalios singing the chorus — another first — but it’s classic Punchline stuff: driving beat, diverse instrumentation, big singable chorus. It’d be hard to call it a departure. Maybe it’s just age. “People have grown up with us,” says Fafalios. “And we’ve grown up with this band.”

{PHOTOS BY HEATHER MULL}

Clockwise from left: Paradise Gray, Jasiri X, Ray Dawn

STATE of the ART {BY SHAWN COOKE}

W

E’VE ALL BEEN there — walking

through the produce section or sitting in a movie theater, when the quiet piano melody and stylings of not-quite-Sam Smith sneak up on you. They lead into a song that seems solely engineered for a maudlin and misty-eyed Vin Diesel to belt in honor of his late best friend, but Wiz Khalifa throttled it up the charts anyway. The song in question, this spring’s inescapable “See You Again,” spent as many non-consecutive weeks at No. 1 as any other rap single in Billboard Hot 100 history. This towering feat, along with

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

Mac Miller’s acclaimed major-label debut, might signify something of a high-water mark for Pittsburgh’s hip-hop reputation. But while 2015 has been the most successful year yet for the city’s two biggest rap stars, the conditions of the local hip-hop scene aren’t what they were when Wiz and Mac broke. Ask most anyone involved in the local scene — from MCs to producers to hip-hop historians — and you get the sense that Pittsburgh is a fractured community with a significantly weaker rap infrastructure than five or six years ago when Khalifa and Miller really started to gain traction.

The past few years look particularly brutal in hindsight, with the foremost venue for up-and-coming hip-hop performers closing its doors; a local, genre-based award show resting in dormancy; and the independent record label which took a chance on Khalifa and Miller casting its gaze over a wider, more national slate of artists. But even if these institutions recharged back to where they were in 2008, discovering the next Pittsburgh rap breakout wouldn’t come overnight. As a city without a clear national music industry spotlight, much less a nationally recognized regional aesthetic, it can be more difficult for local


{WIZ KHALIFA PHOTO BY MIKE SCHWARZ / MAC MILLER PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Pittsburgh’s hip-hop success stories: Wiz Khalifa and Mac Miller

artists to adopt a unified style, like a young rapper from Atlanta, New York or Chicago might. According to Paradise Gray, a hiphop aficionado who witnessed the ’80s New York rap scene firsthand before relocating to Pittsburgh in 1992, the Pittsburgh sound exists — it’s just credited to another section of the country. “People never really identified a Pittsburgh sound [because] that sound was co-opted to the West Coast,” Gray says. Sam Sneed, Mel-Man and Bud’da — a trio of producers with Steel City origins — had their fingerprints all over ’90s West Coast hip hop, with separate production credits on records by Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg and Ice Cube, among others. Khalifa and Miller are the most prominent faces to emerge from Pittsburgh’s hip-hop scene, but Gray argues that these producers maintained just as much, if not more, influence on the genre’s history. So when national media scrambled for “the next Mac Miller” or “the next Wiz Khalifa” following their breakouts, they were never going find a sound-alike, but simply another rap star from the same area code. Jasiri X, a progressive firebrand of an MC, seems to be next in line for a spotlight moment (at least according to City Paper readers), despite sounding completely unlike Khalifa or Miller. Although he’s tackling different thematic territory than either artist, he acknowledges the challenges of emerging in a saturated market. “It’s a more difficult landscape to get out of now than it was when Wiz and Mac got out.

They were [some] of the first artists to blow out of the Internet,” Jasiri says. But alongside Khalifa and Miller, Jasiri has been having a pretty great year in his own right, navigating a more unconventional path to success. Already known for some modestly popular viral music videos such as “What If the Tea Party Was Black?” and “I Am Troy Davis (T.R.O.Y.),” Jasiri — also a noted political activist — continued to build a national profile this year, earning some top artistic grants and awards. Over the past several months, he’s been announced as a recipient for the Ronald H. Brown Community Leadership Award, named a 2015-2016 Robert Rauschenberg Foundation Artist as Activist Fellow, a BMe Leader Fellow and the 2015 United States Artists (USA) Cummings Fellow for Music — and this doesn’t even include his latest album, Black Liberation Theology, which dropped on Black Friday. It’s taken years for Jasiri to arrive at the cusp of national recognition, but one of the most vital spaces where he began to hone his skills is no longer in operation. East Liberty’s Shadow Lounge, which was owned by Justin Strong, closed its doors in 2013. Serving as a hub for the city’s hip-hop talent, it provided an established platform for unproven rappers to refine their craft, along with booking national acts to which young MCs could aspire. According to Jasiri, there isn’t a reliable performance space like the Shadow Lounge for rappers anymore. “Where do you perform? You rap, you’re good. You want other

“THE MOST IMPORTANT THING FOR ANY ARTIST IS JUST HAVING THAT PLACE TO PERFORM.”

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people to hear you … where do you go? That was just this central place,” Jasiri says. But perhaps the Shadow Lounge’s most useful function for up-and-coming rappers was the opportunity for workshopping, and for feeding off each other’s energy at weekly open-mic nights and occasional events like Rhyme Calisthenics, where Miller fleshed out his technical chops. For Ray Dawn, who made the 180-degree turn from law student to MC in 2008, finding a new venue to fill the Shadow Lounge’s void might be one of the most sensible remedies for Pittsburgh hip hop. “The most important thing for any artist is just having that place to perform. Bringing back a solid, weekly open mic for hip-hop acts would be dope,” Dawn says. Aside from working toward a national career, local rappers used to have a smallerscale milestone for which they could strive: the Pittsburgh Hip-Hop Awards. Founded in 2007 by Dwayne Muhammad, they were co-hosted by Paradise Gray and Melle Mel, of Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. The awards gave a young Khalifa, Miller and Jasiri something they could ascend to on a local level. But since Muhammad passed away in 2011, Gray thought it would be best to put the awards on hold for the foreseeable future. Restoring the Pittsburgh Hip-Hop Awards or finding a spiritual successor to the Shadow Lounge might help to reunify the scene locally, but it wouldn’t necessarily build up the larger industry support system that helped Miller and Khalifa near the turn of the decade. Buoyed by the influence and business acumen of Rostrum Records, the city’s hip-hop poster boys were able to earn far more looks online outside of Pittsburgh than they would with self-released

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STATE OF THE ART, CONTINUED FROM PG. 27

projects. As Khalifa and Miller continued to broaden their scope on national and international levels, Rostrum followed suit, extending its reach far beyond Pittsburgh and the genre of hip hop, while still sporting local mainstays like Boaz and pop band Donora. Given the current lack of industry power-players currently in Pittsburgh, an artist could have plenty of talent or vision, but still need sound business minds to help guide a project. Akil Esoon, a producer and recording artist who recently heard a few of his own tracks featured on TV’s Empire, suggests that mentorship doesn’t just have to be a business transaction. “That’ll help the Pittsburgh landscape, too — having artists here based in Pittsburgh who have the experience within the hip-hop industry to push, nurture and mentor the younger artists coming up,” Esoon says.

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NEW RELEASES

THE TURBOSONICS TRES GATOS SUAVE (SELF-RELEASED) WWW.THETURBOSONICS.COM

The first two tunes on the second fulllength album from this local surf-rock trio almost bored me to the point of turning it off. They were too subtle, too similar to the basic surf-rock tunes we’ve all heard before. It’s a genre that breeds similarity, but even subtle surf songs need their jaw-dropping moments. I’m glad I didn’t give up, though, because this record definitely has them. Songs like “Jeanette’s Pier” and “Skip Jack Strut” are jammed with special moments when guitarist Jason Truckenbroad, bassist Keith Caldwell and drummer Timmy Klatte are firing on all cylinders, perfectly in sync. Other songs suffer from a lack of balance — lead guitar is important in surf rock but so is a prominent bass that sometimes sounds like it’s playing lead, and hard-driving percussion. Overall, though, it’s a solid effort. BY CHARLIE DEITCH

{PHOTO COURTESY OF JOSHUA FRANZOS / FORMULA412}

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

EVERY THURSDAY

Although large-scale success stories might be harder to come by, you get the sense that there’s no shortage of hip-hop talent in Pittsburgh — just a shortage of marketing power. Until the infrastructure finds its way back, local talent might rest on the brink of a wider spotlight. It remains unclear when the next Shadow Lounge or Rostrum Records might arise, but there’s a glimmer of hope for the resurgence of one local touchstone: Paradise Gray says that it might be time to bring back the Pittsburgh Hip-Hop Awards. After laying low for a few years, he plans to discuss a reboot of the Hip-Hop Awards over the next year. The Awards far from guarantee the rise of more breakout stars, but it’s a start — and it might just give the scene a vital jolt of optimism. “I don’t think Pittsburgh has really had its golden era yet — not in disrespect to anything anybody’s done yet,” Gray says. “I think that Pittsburgh’s golden era’s going to launch a multitude of artists … Pittsburgh is not done yet when it comes to hip hop.” INF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

THE TURBOSONICS. 7 p.m. Sat., Dec. 19. Nied’s Hotel. 5438 Butler St., Lawrenceville. 412-781-9853 or www.niedshotel.myfastsite.com

THE NIED’S HOTEL BAND “LIVE & MORE” (SEVEN FIELDS ENTERTAINMENT) WWW.NIEDSHOTELBAND. MYFASTSITE.COM

Nied’s Hotel Band — named for the long-standing Lawrenceville bar — could be called the E Street Band of Pittsburgh, thanks to John Vento’s rousing vocals and the generous contributions of saxophonist Ed Jonnet. Live & More (released earlier this year) features tracks recorded at the Oaks Theatre and the Pittsburgh Winery. There are a couple studio recordings as well, but thanks to quality production and tight performances, it’s hard to pick them out from the live tracks. Occasionally the record veers into cheese, but with bluecollar bar rock, that’s part of the charm. BY MARGARET WELSH

NIED’S HOTEL BAND. 7 p.m. Fri., Dec. 18. Fox Chapel Racquet Club, 355 Hunt Road, Fox Chapel. 412-963-8331


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{PHOTO COURTESY OF POLLY WHITEHORN}

CRITICS’ PICKS

The Early Mays

Garden Center Christmas Trees Wreaths Poinsettias Christmas Cactus Garlands ... and much more! 100 51st St / Lawrenceville

412-687-2010 Off Butler Street /Across from Goodwill

Open 7 days a week, 11am-9pm

Named the 2014 Pittsburgh Artist of the Year by WYEP, the local Americana group The Early Mays performs tonight at St. Andrew’s Lutheran Church, with support from Rachel Eddy and Kipyn Martin. The women who comprise the trio — Judith Avers, Emily Pinkerton and Ellen Gozion — are all accomplished musicians in their own right, and the group’s original compositions and faithful renditions of traditional material have received wide acclaim. In addition to local radio attention, the trio has earned air time all over the country, Ali and its 2014 self-titled Spagnola record debuted at No. 2 on the National Folk DJ Charts and stayed in the top 10 for three months. Tonight’s holiday-themed performance highlights classics by country and folk legends, Christmas carols, and of course, original songs. Andrew Woehrel 8 p.m. 304 Morewood Ave., Shadyside. $15 suggested donation. 412-242-7769 or email ellen@ ellengozion.com

[PUNK] + SAT., DEC. 19

Do you know what your Pittsburgh city councilor has been up to? Follow the latest updates on our blog at www.pghcitypaper.com 30

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

The punk-rock scumballs of upstate New York’s Scuzz are even filthier than their name suggests. The recent split with fellow Albany punks Male Pattern is advertised as “Albany’s worst.” Self-deprecation aside, there is a transgressive artistic quality to this kind of grimy punk that can be appreciated tonight at Gooski’s, with locals Mower and Honeymoon. Scuzz’s blackand-white album covers bring to mind a lowbrow “comix”-style marriage of R. Crumb and Rudimentary Peni’s Nick Blinko, a perfect representation of the band’s gross

yet entertaining style. AW 9 p.m. 3117 Brereton St., Polish Hill. $5. 412-681-1658

[FESTIVUS] + SAT., DEC. 19 With the 1997 episode “The Strike,” Seinfeld introduced the world to Festivus, a non-religious, non-commercial, low-pressure alternative holiday “for the rest of us.” Tonight, Festivus festivities commence in Pittsburgh, at Howlers, for the 11th year in a row, making it one of (if not the) longest-running annual Festivus celebrations around. Expect all the Festivus trimmings and traditions: an unadorned steel pole, the Airing of Grievances, the Feats of Strength, and plenty of Festivus miracles; plus Seinfeld trivia and prizes, and performances by local acts like Endless Mike & the Beagle Club, Reinforced and The Scott Fry Experience. AW 9 p.m. 4509 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. $5. 412-682-0320 or www. howlerspittsburgh.com

[POP] + TUE., DEC. 22 Between maintaining her status as a bona fide Internet celebrity, fighting expensive legal battles and going viral — Google her Vine video “How to make a mimosa (in 6 seconds)” — Pittsburgh native Ali Spagnola might be the busiest person on Earth. Her 2011 release, The Power Hour Album, is designed to guide the listener through 60 shots of beer in an hour: a harrowing and foamy experience to be sure. Victorious after an epic copyright dispute involving the “Power Hour” moniker, Spagnola, who now lives in Los Angeles, returns to her hometown to perform at Club Café tonight with special guests The Nerd Herders. Remember to bring a shot glass! AW 8 p.m. 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $12. 412-431-4950 or www.clubcafelive.com {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Cavacini

[FOLK] + FRI., DEC. 18


CALL NOW & SAVE UP TO 84% ON YOUR NEXT PRESCRIPTION TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS 412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X165 (PHONE) {ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION} THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Bastard Bearded Irishmen w/ Black Masala. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

KOLLAR CLUB. Chet Vincent & The Big Bend, Ghost Guts, Wreck Loose, The Red Western, Satin Gum, Clinton Clegg & Paul Luc Duo, Chrome Moses, Andrè BACKDRAFT BAR & GRILLE. Costello & the Cool Minors. Daniels & McClain. Baldwin. South Side. 412-431-2002. 412-885-1239. MEADOWS CASINO. Lyndsey BEAVER FALLS TURNERS Smith & Soul Distribution. CLUB. The Dave Iglar Band. Washington. 724-503-1200. Beaver Falls. 724-843-7576. MOONDOG’S. Six Speed THE BLIND PIG SALOON. Kill, The Filthy Lowdown, King’s Ransom. The Anti-Psychotics, New Kensington. & Bill Jasper 724-337-7008. Acoustics. Blawnox. CLUB CAFE. Mark 412-828-2040. www. per pa Dignam & the House of MR. SMALLS pghcitym .co Song w/ Heather Kropf. THEATER. The South Side. 412-431-4950. Black Dahlia Murder w/ DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Goatwhore, Iron Reagan, Verdict. Robinson. 412-489-5631. Entheos, Artificial Brain. Millvale. EXCUSES BAR & GRILL. 412-821-4447. Bill Toms & Hard Rain. South Side. NIED’S HOTEL. Slim Forsythe 412-431-4090. & the Turbosonics. Lawrenceville. HOWLERS. Festivus XI: 412 781-9853. Endless Mike & The Beagle Club, THE R BAR. The Rockit Band. Reinforced, Scott Fry Experience. Dormont. 412 942-0882. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. The Cause. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177. TOWN TAVERN. DRIVEN. West Leechburg. 724-845-2430.

ROCK/POP THU 17

SAT 19

THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Urban Pioneers, Mickey & The Snake Oil Boys. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

FRI 18 AMERICAN LEGION. Daniels & McClain. Clairton. 412-233-9903. EAST LIBERTY PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH. The Brass Roots & Dr. Ed Moore. East Liberty. 412-441-3800. HAMBONE’S. Joanna Lowe, Victoria Susan, Blue Clutch, Lia Silverbeams. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. MR. SMALLS THEATER. All That Remains w/ Devour the Day, Audiotopsy, Sons of Texas. Millvale. 412-821-4447. REX THEATER. Pigeons Playing Ping Pong. South Side. 412-381-6811.

FULL LIST ONLINE

MP 3 MONDAY

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SUN 20 THE R BAR. Midnite Horns. Dormont. 412-942-0882.

BLACK JAY

MON 21 {PHOTO COURTESY OF THE PLUG & JAMES “RUFF BONE” WHITE}

THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Butler Street Session w/ SGDB. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

WED 23 SPIRIT. Santa Youth, Super Fun Time Awesome Party Band, Crisis In America, Johnny & the Razorblades. Lawrenceville. 740-424-0302.

DJS FRI 18 ANDYS WINE BAR. DJ Malls Spins Vinyl. Downtown. 412-773-8884. ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. Downtown. 412-874-4582. RIVERS CASINO. DJ NIN. North Side. 412-231-7777. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. South Side. 412-381-1330.

SAT 19

Each week we bring you a new song by a local artist. This week’s offering comes from rapper Black Jay. Stream or download the single “We Go Hard” for free at FFW>>, our music blog at www.pghcitypaper.com.

BRILLOBOX. Pandemic vs Lazercrunk: Drinking Dancing Stomping Lazers. Bloomfield. 412-251-6058. DIESEL. DJ CK. South Side. 412-431-8800. CONTINUES ON PG. 32

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CONCERTS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 31

WED 23

TUESDAY DEC 29/10PM EMO NIGHT

FRI 18

SATURDAYS 10PM DANCE PARTY

GOOD TIMES ON TAP. Strange Brew. Bentleyville. 724-239-9927. TUGBOAT’S. Jason Born Trio. East Pittsburgh. 412-829-1992. VERONA MOOSE. The Witchdoctors. Verona. 412-828-3119.

ALL DAY, EVERY DAY 2204 E. CARSON ST. (412) 431-5282 lavaloungepgh.com

! P U N E T S I L You read City Paper’s music coverage every week, but why not listen to it too? Each Wednesday, music editor Margaret Welsh crafts a Spotify playlist with tracks from artists featured in the music section, and other artists playing around town in the coming days.

Find it on our music blog, FFW>>, at pghcity paper.com

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

FRI 18 MEADOWS CASINO. Phillip Fox Band. Washington. 724-503-1200.

CLASSICAL THU 17 PITTSBURGH SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA. “The Music of Star Wars: Episodes I-VI.” Heinz Hall, Downtown. 412-392-4900.

Julia Holter

SAT 19

BLUES

FRIDAYS 10PM ALT 80S NIGHT

$2.75 PBR POUNDERS OR PBR DRAFTS

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SMILING MOOSE. Rock Star Karaoke w/ T-MONEY. South Side. 412-431-4668. SPOON. Spoon Fed. East Liberty. 412-362-6001.

EARLY WARNINGS {PHOTO COURTESY OF TONJE THILESEN}

LAVA LOUNGE. The Night Shift DJs. Obsidian: gothic/ industrial dancing. South Side. 412-431-5282. REMEDY. Push It! DJ Huck Finn, DJ Kelly Fasterchild. Lawrenceville. 412-781-6771. RIVERS CASINO. DJ Digital Dave. North Side. 412-231-7777. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. SPIRIT. DJ Kelly. Tracksploitation. Lawrenceville. 412-586-4441.

MOONDOG’S. The Nighthawks, Billy Price. Blawnox. 412-828-2040.

{SAT., JAN. 16}

SAT 19

Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band Consol Energy Center, 1001 Fifth Ave., Uptown {SAT., FEB. 27}

Julia Holter

TUE 22

Club Café, 56 S. 12th St., South Side

BLUSH SPORTS BAR. Shari Richards. Jam session. Downtown. 412-281-7703.

{MON., APRIL 04}

JAZZ

Elle King

THU 17

Mr. Small’s Theatre, 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale

ANDYS WINE BAR. Dane Vannatter. Downtown. 412-773-8884. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Roger Humphries Jam Session. Ballroom. North Side. 412-904-3335.

FRI 18 ANDYS WINE BAR. Kenia. Downtown. 412-773-8884. BUTLER’S GOLF COURSE. Virgil Walters & Erin Burkett. W/ Eric Susoeff, Eric DeFade. Mostly Holiday Music. Butler. 412-751-1070. GRILLE ON SEVENTH. Tony Campbell & Howie Alexander. Downtown. 412-391-1004. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. The Boilermaker Jazz Band. North Side. 412-904-3335. LEMONT. Mark Pipas. Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Neon Swing X-Perience. Downtown. 412-471-9100.

SAT 19 ANDYS WINE BAR. Mark Pipas. Downtown. 412-773-8884. THE CLUB BAR & GRILL 1. Tubby Daniels. Monroeville. 412-728-4155. LEMONT. Take Two. Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Billy the Kid & the Regulators. Downtown. 412-471-9100. SUPPER CLUB RESTAURANT. Frank Cunimondo, Patricia Skala. Greensburg. 724-691-0536.

TUE 22 THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Space Exchange: Chris Parkermas. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

WED 23 ANDYS WINE BAR. Kathy Connor. Downtown. 412-773-8884. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Dr. Zoot. Downtown. 412-471-9100.

PITTSBURGH SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA. Holiday Pops w/ singer/songwriter & PGH native Chris Jamison. Heinz Hall, Downtown. 412-392-4900. WESTMORELAND SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA. Celebrate the sounds of the season w/ your favorite instrumental & choral holiday music featuring the All-Star Choir of Westmoreland County & special guests. Palace Theatre, Greensburg. 724-837-1850.

SUN 20 AEOLIAN WINDS. Performing popular film music from films such as Frozen & Star Wars. Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058. PITTSBURGH SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA. Holiday Pops w/ singer/songwriter & PGH native Chris Jamison. Heinz Hall, Downtown. 412-392-4900.

OTHER MUSIC THU 17 HARD ROCK CAFE. Benton Blount, Corey James, Keith Gill Jr. Station Square. 724-941-3075.

FRI 18

ST. ANDREW’S LUTHERAN CHURCH. The Early Mays. Carnegie. 412-242-7769.

SAT 19 ELWOOD’S PUB. Ms. Freddye’s Home Cookin’ Band. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181. PARK HOUSE. John Wiatrak. North Side. 412-224-2273.

ATLAS BOTTLE WORKS. Haygood Paisleys, Casual Hobos, Lone Pine String Band. Lawrenceville. 412-904-4248. KELLY’S IRISH PUB & CARIBBEAN ISLAND. The Bo’Hog Brothers. Beaver. 724-728-0222.

SAT 19

DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Chad Squires. Robinson. 412-969-7072. HOP FARM BREWING. The Shameless Hex. Lawrenceville. 412-726-7912.

OAKS THEATER. Jessica Lee Old Time Hollywood Christmas Show. ALLEGHENY ELKS Travel back in time LODGE #339. w/ Jessica Lee, Mark Pittsburgh Banjo Club. Strickland, Mike Clancy, Wednesdays. North www. per a p Rick Laus, & Glenn pghcitym Side. 412-321-1834. .co Utsch as they take HAMBONE’S. Tim & you on a musical journey John Christmas Singalong. back to the golden age of Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. Hollywood Christmas. Oakmont. PARK HOUSE. Shelf Life String 412-828-6322. Band. North Side. 412-224-2273.

FRI 18

REGGAE

ACOUSTIC THU 17

CLADDAGH IRISH PUB. Weekend at Blarneys. South Side. 412-381-4800. ELWOOD’S PUB. Tony Germaine. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181. MULLANEY’S HARP & FIDDLE. Tim & John Christmas Singalong. Strip District. 412-642-6622. PARK HOUSE. Someone & The Something. North Side. 412-224-2273.

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FULL LIST E N O LIN

FRI 18 CAPRI PIZZA AND BAR. Bombo Claat w/ VYBZ Machine Intl Sound System. East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

COUNTRY THU 17 ELWOOD’S PUB. The Fiddlers. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181.

SUN 20 OLD ST. LUKE’S. The Early Mays. Scott. 412-969-7072.

HOLIDAY MUSIC SAT 19 MT. LEBANON UNITED LUTHERAN CHURCH. The Pittsburgh Camerata. A Celtic Christmas Carol. Mt. Lebanon. 412-563-0300.


PAID ADVERTORIAL SPONSORED BY

What to do December 16 - 22

IN PITTSBURGH

WEDNESDAY 16 FRIDAY 18 The 14th Annual Pittsburgh Holiday Doo Wop Concert HEINZ HALL Downtown. 412-392-4900. Tickets: heinzhall.org. 7:30p.m.

THURSDAY 17

14TH ANNUAL PITTSBURGH HOLIDAY DOO WOP CONCERT

21+ Night: Holiday Party

HEINZ HALL WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 16

CARNEGIE SCIENCE CENTER North Side. Tickets: carnegiesciencecenter.org. 6p.m.

Spanish Harlem Orchestra Salsa Navidad

Aaron Gillespie SMILING MOOSE South Side. 412-431-4668. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 7p.m.

Benton Blount HARD ROCK CAFE Station Square. 412-481-ROCK. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

Punchline “Thrilled” Record Release Party ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412-263-2877. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

N E W S

SMILING MOOSE South Side. 412-431-4668. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 6:30p.m.

All That Remains MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-821-4447. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 7:30p.m.

TUESDAY 22

Pigeons Playing Ping Pong

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

REX THEATER South Side. 412-381-6811. Over 18 show. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 9p.m.

SATURDAY 19

HEINZ HALL Downtown. 412-392-4900. Tickets: trustarts.org. Through Dec. 27.

MARY WILSON OF THE SUPREMES

Mark Dignam & the House of Song

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

TA S T E

TRAX FARMS South Hills. Reservations required, call 412-835-3246. 9:30a.m. or 12:30p.m.

Polyphia

Tickets: trustarts.org. 8p.m.

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Breakfast or Lunch with Santa

MONDAY 21

The Music of Star Wars: AUGUST WILSON CENTER Downtown. 412-456-6666. Episodes I-VI HEINZ HALL Downtown. 412-392-4900. Tickets: pittsburghsymphony.org. 7p.m.

SUNDAY 20

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Austin Jones

1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 6p.m.

SMILING MOOSE South Side. 412-431-4668. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or

WSO presents Home for the Holidays

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Ali Spagnola’s Power Hour CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

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THEIR EMOTIONS ARE ALL AS DRY AS THEIR CHARACTERS ARE WET

SOLITARY MAN {BY AL HOFF} There’s little doubt that Jack, the man at the center of writer-director Jason Krawczyk’s horror thriller He Never Died, is an odd sort. He’s antisocial to the point of rudeness; he sleeps a lot in his gloomy, sparsely decorated apartment; and when he does go out, he follows a dull routine: eating at the same diner and playing bingo with the neighborhood seniors. And there is the unexplained regular stop in a parking lot, where Jack (played by Henry Rollins) appears to purchase a bag of bloody body parts (origins unknown).

H S I F , O G

Angry at the world: Henry Rollins as Jack

Then a couple of events jolt Jack out of his rut: He has a run-in with some local toughs (easily vanquished by Jack’s seemingly super-human strength), and a long-lost daughter appears. Forced to interact with the world, Jack is gradually revealed to be something not quite like the rest of us: He’s impervious to bullets, he knows about stuff that happened centuries ago and, well, there’s that taste for bloody bits. Krawczyk’s film is a bit of a slow burn, juiced up with some violent action scenes. And despite its mostly somber vibe, He Never Died does offer the occasional bit of dark humor. The work has the feel of a graphic-novel adaptation, and should appeal to fans who like a lean but intriguing story with a morally conflicted, avenging anti-hero at the helm. Its main attraction is its star, Rollins — the former Black Flag frontman, and current writer, spoken-word performer and ad hoc culture critic. Rollins has dabbled in acting before, most notably portraying a violent white supremacist in a season-long stint on Sons of Anarchy. And his solid, vaguely threatening physicality gives the mysterious Jack an immediate and believable presence. (Raise your hand if you can easily imagine Rollins biting the neck out of somebody.) But Rollins also has a sensitive side — he’s a published poet! — and he lets a little of that through when Jack turns from recluse to involved citizen. Starts Fri., Dec. 18. Hollywood

D

IRECTED BY Ron Howard, Holly-

wood’s redoubtable storyteller across so many genres, In the Heart of the Sea is the sort of 3-D CGI epic you want to avoid: hackneyed, unsubtle, visually gorgeous and stuffed with banal good intentions. It edifies with a few severe lessons about the challenges of early 19th-century sailing and whaling, but considering the price of admission, Wikipedia will suffice. The true story at the root of In the Heart of the Sea happened in 1820, when the Essex, sailing some very rough waters, encountered a vengeful white(ish) whale of mammoth proportions. The leviathan destroyed the ship, and the survivors, who drifted for three months, did what they had to do to reach land alive. A few of them even made it. The published accounts that followed eventually reached the eyes of a young writer — call him Herman — who turned it into a novel in 1851 that’s been the bane of every high

AHOFF@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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Chris Hemsworth in In the Heart of the Sea

{BY HARRY KLOMAN}

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

school English student since. It’s told as a flashback, with Melville coaxing the story of what happened from an aging survivor who’s never spoken of the horrors. The action is spectacular, but from The Perfect Storm to Cast Away, we’ve seen it all before. There’s some claptrap

IN THE HEART OF THE SEA DIRECTED BY: Ron Howard STARRING: Chris Hemsworth, Cillian Murphy, Brendan Gleeson, Ben Whishaw In 3-D in select theaters

about the insignificance of our greedy pathetic God-fearing species compared to the purity of nature, and it ends with the discovery of a new source of energy to replace whale oil: Someone in Pennsylvania, it seems, has found oil in the ground. You know the rest of that story. And how about a little class struggle?

The ship’s dandy captain gets his job only because his daddy owns the company, and his rugged and more qualified working-class first mate naturally resents him. It doesn’t take long for the former to endanger the ship and for the latter to save their asses. Their dialogue, written by Pittsburgh native Charles Leavitt (Blood Diamond), who based his screenplay on former Pittsburgher Nathaniel Philbrick’s nonfiction book, is mannered to the point of being stuffy. The cast is variably venerable (Brendan Gleeson as the old survivor), distinguished (Ben Whishaw as Melville), interesting (Broadway actor Benjamin Walker as the captain), pretty to look at (Chris Hemsworth, with a smörgåsbord of accents, as the first mate), and overwhelmingly male (the sea is no place for sissies or missies). Unfortunately, their emotions are all as dry as their characters are wet in a movie that’s too formulaic even for its formula. I N F O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM


FILM CAPSULES CP

= CITY PAPER APPROVED

NEW THIS WEEK ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: THE ROAD CHIP. In this new animated and live-action comedy about singing rodents, three chipmunks try to prevent their human buddy (Jason Lee) from getting married and leaving them. That’s a lot of troubling emotions to unpack for the holidays, but it probably resolves well. Walt Becker directs. Starts Fri., Dec. 18 THE BIG SHORT. This dark comedy from Adam McKay is adapted from Michael Lewis’ account of the handful of investors who saw the 2008 mortgage collapse coming, and profited by betting that it would. Steve Carell, Christian Bale, Ryan Gosling and Brad Pitt star. Starts Wed., Dec. 23 SISTERS. Jason Moore directs this comedy about two sisters who stage a house party in the old family homestead before it gets sold. Tina Fey and Amy Pohler star. Starts Fri., Dec. 18 STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS. Well, you were left hanging in 1983 when Star Wars: The Return of the Jedi ended. George Lucas’ ninepart space saga revs up again, with this latest chapter catching up with Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Princess Leia, now 30 years on. There are loads of new characters, too, and plenty more space action! J.J. Abrams directs. In 3-D and IMAX, at select theaters. Starts Fri., Dec. 18

REPERTORY MOUSEHUNT. Over his multi-decade career, actor Christopher Walken has suited up to take on any number of tricky adversaries. But in Gore Verbinksi’s 1997 comedy, he goes twitchy eye to twitchy nose with a tiny but formidable opponent: a mouse. Walken plays the exterminator hired to extract the troublesome rodent from the antique house inherited by a pair of brothers (Nathan Lane and Lee Evans). 7 p.m. Thu., Dec. 17. Hollywood NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CHRISTMAS VACATION. For my money, the funniest entry in the “Vacation” franchise, because it taps a universal truth: Other people’s behavior ruins your holidays, while your behavior contributes to other people’s misery. It’s all about giving and getting! Everyman Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase) tries to lay on the perfect Christmas, but is undercut by his low-rent cousin (Randy Quaid), uptight neighbors, demanding elderly relatives, his boss, a squirrel and a tangle of Christmas lights. Jeremiah S. Chechik directs this 1989 neo-classic holiday comedy, penned by John Hughes. 7:30 p.m. Thu., Dec. 17 (AMC Loews, $5). Also, Fri., Dec. 18-Tue., Dec. 22, and Dec. 24-25 (Row House Cinema, Lawrenceville). (AH)

CP

IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE. See Frank Capra’s beloved 1946 holiday classic, in which a harried man (Jimmy Stewart) rediscovers the simple joys of life, on the big screen. Tell ’em Clarence sent you. Fri., Dec. 18-Tue., Dec. 22 (Regent Square, free) and 7:30 p.m. Tue., Dec. 22 (AMC Loews, $5). A CHRISTMAS STORY. Guess what Ralphie wants for Christmas? An official Red Ryder Carbine Action 200-shot air rifle. Will he get it? Discover this and other small wonders of holidays past in Bob Clark’s 1983 holiday film. Fri., Dec. 18-Dec. 25. Row House Cinema

Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip ing a Los Angeles skyscraper from a dozen terrorists. But New York cop John McLane (Bruce Willis) makes it look fun. John McTiernan directs this 1988 actioner that made Willis a big-time movie star. RiffTrax edition: 7 p.m. Fri., Dec. 18, and 9 p.m. Sat., Dec. 19. Also, Dec. 20, Dec. 21 and Dec. 23-25. Row House, Lawrenceville BAD SANTA. Willie T. Soke (Billy Bob Thornton) is one dissolute and drunken Santa Claus: He and his “elf” partner Marcus (Tony Cox) suffer through their low-budget North Pole mall act in order to gain access to rip off the store. Comic circumstances require that Soke move in with Thurman (Brett Kelly), a lonely, pudgy boy who believes in “Santa.” It’s not that director Terry Zwigoff isn’t entitled to unload a deep, dark film, especially on such an easy target — it’s just that the film should be better. It’s basically a one-joke enterprise: Santa is an asshole. Bad Santa — for better or worse — never does let up in its misanthropy. This earns my grudging admiration. And the film does harbor a few inspired moments: Marcus’ elf-ear tips, which evidently don’t come in shades guaranteed to blend with African-American skin tones; Thurman’s perverse literalness; and every moment that John Ritter is on the screen. Fri., Dec. 18-Sun., Dec. 20, and Dec. 22-25. Row House Cinema (AH) WHITE CHRISTMAS. Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye are a pair of entertainers who travel to Vermont with two singing sisters (Rosemary Clooney and Vera-Ellen) for the holidays. Once there, the men discover the country inn is run by their old Army general, and he’s in financial straits. Looks like a big musical show might be the ticket! Besides the title song, Michael Curtiz’s 1954 film includes other Irving Berlin classics such as “Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep” and “Blue Skies.” 11 a.m. Sun., Dec. 20; 7:30 p.m. Wed., Dec. 23; and 7:30 p.m. Thu., Dec. 24. Hollywood

Brew Cinema: MouseHunt (1997) - 12/17 @ 7pm

Local beer, an exclusive poster, and the movie. _________________________________________________

He Never Died (2015) - 12/18 @ 7:30pm & 10pm, 12/19 @ 7pm & 9:15pm, 12/20 @ 7pm, 12/21 @ 7:30pm, 12/22 @ 7:30pm

A social outcast (Henry Rollins) embarks on a bloody quest to save his long-lost daughter from a crime syndicate. _________________________________________________

Rocky Horror Picture Show

- 12/19 @ Midnight With live shadowcast by the JCCP! _________________________________________________

Breakfast and a Movie - 12/20 @ 10:30pm

Featuring the movie White Christmas (1954), buy tickets by 12/17 for catered brunch. Be a part of this fabulous holiday tradition at the Hollywood!

DIE HARD. It’s pretty much the worst way to spend Christmas Eve, single-handedly defend-

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[PUBLIC ART]

WE SUPPLY THE MISSING CONTEXT WITH MINDS PROGRAMMED TO FILL IN THE BLANKS

GRAY OUT Since 2003, “Lend Me Your Ears,” a mural designed by Jordan Monahan and executed with assistance from Alison Zapata, has welcomed visitors to East Liberty. The two-story-tall work, depicting young men on bicycles, a young girl blowing bubbles, birds’ wings and flowers, was dynamic and colorful, a vibrant representation of the neighborhood. Last week, the mural was replaced by a solid wash of gray, a change that many are calling disrespectful at best, and even literal whitewashing. Social media exploded with postings of the paint-over in progress. Many observers regarded the erasure of the images of African-American youths as a chilling reflection of what gentrification is doing to the community’s residents. “It felt very symbolic of the changes that we warned about for the last several years,” says filmmaker Chris Ivey, whose documentary-film series East of Liberty has chronicled recent rapid changes in the neighborhood. Artist Zapata is also saddened by the mural’s disappearance. “It’s like losing a friend,” she says. The paint-over follows the recent sale of the building at Penn Avenue and Euclid to real-estate developer Alphabet City. According to the local firm’s website, the building is slated to have office space on top and retail on the bottom. The mural reportedly didn’t fit into its plans. At press time, Alphabet City had not returned calls from CP seeking comment. But according to Cathy Lewis Long, executive director of The Sprout Fund, the mural’s funder, the firm had contacted Monahan about adapting the work to the renovation. However, Monahan declined. He also declined CP’s request to comment on the paint-over. Last week, even as workers covered up “Lend Me Your Ears,” some observers were criticizing Sprout. Lewis Long says the group would have liked to prevent the paint-over, but that the original mural agreement protected the work only under the building’s previous owner, Novum Pharmaceutical Research Services. In renderings of the planned renovation on Alphabet City’s website, the building’s ground level seems dedicated to shopping, while an upper floor boasts large windows revealing day-lit office space. The outside of the property is surrounded by trees pent up in tidy squares of sidewalk. Moving throughout are people, holding coffee cups and shopping bags, in the midst of work or enjoying a day of leisure. The leaves on the spindly trees are green. The building is blue gray slate. The people, every single one, are white.

The paint-over of “Lend Me Your Ears,” in progress {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

{BY LISSA BRENNAN}

[ART REVIEW]

DOMESTIC

FRONT FRO {BY LISSA BRENNAN}

THE SCENE AT the beginning of “The

Jump,” one of the works of video included in Hetain Patel’s exhibition At Home, at Wood Street Galleries, is one we recognize. Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man is crouched, his location unidentifiable but familiar. He’s surrounded by blackness; softly lit bluegray smoke floats in clouds behind him, and a score moodily grand seems to propel him. We supply the missing context with minds programmed to fill in the blanks based on our prior experience of the web-slinger and set him atop a building, in a city, at night, protecting. The music wells and roils, ponderous and in sync with his slow motion, and he sinks deeper only to push himself back up, centimeter by centimeter, then, finally, to take flight. Childhood daydreams often revolve around heroism, whether enacted by a mysterious, masked crusader or by a sword-wielding warrior. They’re romantic in a cinematic way, fantastical and impossible. In At Home, Patel examines this starry-eyed idealism and converts it into something achievably romantic, human and, in the very best sense of the word, mundane — within the grasp of ordinary men, and honestly, stunningly, real. The show, part of the Pittsburgh Cul-

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

Hetain Patel, as Spider-Man, in the London home of his grandmother

tural Trust’s India in Focus festival, is the U.K.-based performance artist’s North American exhibit debut. Just a trio of videos and a handful of photographs comprise the show, but their impact is gigantic. “To Dance Like

AT HOME: HETAIN PATEL continues through Dec. 31. Wood Street Galleries, 601 Wood St., Downtown. 412-471-5605 or www.woodstreetgalleries.org

Your Dad” documents on split screens Patel’s father, performing his duties in the daily operations of an automotive factory, then Patel himself, duplicating the man’s actions and words, exploring how

the mannerisms and characteristics of the former are passed down to the latter. All of the photographs in “Eva” feature the artist’s wife — as portraiture not of her, but rather of who she is in terms of his identity. Her nude body serves as canvas, decorated with henna, with the text of a love letter, a dialogue on marriage with quotes from Bruce Lee, and the cover of an issue of The Amazing Spider-Man. “The First Dance” rounds out the trio of videos. It’s the most complicated of the three, with up to six screens concurrently projected; the most elaborate, possessing choreography and costumes; and the most moving. It begins with preparation, Eva pinning on scarves in front of a mirror, Patel setting up cameras on the sidewalk, words on technicalities and set-ups


and framing between the two as they ready for the big performance. When all is a go, Patel replicates a sequence of movement from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, the 2000 Ang Lee blockbuster that introduced many American viewers of mainstream cinema to the martialarts action film and the traditions of wuxia. While Patel channels Chow Yun Fat, replacing his sword with a yardstick and executing maneuvers learned from repeated viewing, Eva stands in for Michelle Yeoh, watching. Outside their home, Eva gazes at her husband from the doorway while he performs kung fu in his wedding sherwani in a south London street as passersby hurry past and pretend not to notice. It’s endearing, funny, charming and strangely beautiful, not only as a work by Patel but as a document of their marriage, a product of a joint effort between husband and wife that is simultaneously a love song from husband to wife.

THE CHILDHOOD DREAMS AREN’T ABANDONED, BUT REFINED AND MADE PRACTICAL Collectively, these pieces form a thoughtful and earnest meditation on love, home and the journey from the family that created you to the family that you create, growing and refining the hopes of youth — mythological, wild and epic — to the accomplishments of adulthood: responsible, devoted and grounded. The childhood dreams aren’t abandoned, but refined and made practical, recasting that which is “super” from a staple of fiction to the domain of a man solidly rooted in reality. As seen at the conclusion of “The Jump,” the wall-crawler soars through the air, soundtrack swelling, then peaks and begins his descent. When his Spandexclad feet hit the ground, they don’t touch down upon the asphalt of an urban street, cobblestones of an historic district or wet pavement of a darkened alley. They strike carpet, its patterns the geometric forms of flowers and leaves, with soft hues and gentle shapes. It’s the living room of Patel’s grandmother’s house in Britain, a house that has at one point or another been a home not only to Patel himself but to all of the relatives that have immigrated there. The hero here is a household one, and the ending happier than Hollywood could ever manufacture.

[BOOKS]

LANDSCAPES {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL}

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Pittsburgh is known for, and by, its bridges. But nearly 200 years after Allegheny County’s first bridge was built, one pleasure of Pittsburgh’s Bridges (Arcadia Publishing, $21.99) is that it highlights not just our iconic river spans, but also the ravine bridges, footbridges and railroad overpasses that so mark everyday life. In 128 pages of concise text and copious photos, locally based co-authors Todd Wilson and Helen Wilson offer histories of some 140 bridges past and present. You’ll learn everything from the birthdate of the Allegheny River’s Three Sisters (1926) to the role a succession of bridges played in forging the Point as Pittsburgh’s now-bridgeless cynosure. The black-andwhite, mostly archival photos also cover the construction and use (and in some cases the demolition) of such ravine-spanners as the South Side’s Mission Street Bridge, Duck Hollow’s now-vanished McFarren Street footbridge and two dozen of the railroad overpasses that bind the city like steel staples. Todd Wilson is a transportation engineer and life-long bridge enthusiast, and supplies plenty about these bridges’ technical aspects. But even if you can’t tell a Parker truss from a tied arch, if you read his book, you won’t look at Pittsburgh the same way again.

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FRIDAY, DECEMBER 18, 2015 • 8 pm

AUGUST WILSON CENTER TRUSTARTS.ORG • BOX OFFICE AT THEATER SQUARE 412-456-6666 • GROUPS 10+ TICKETS 412-471-6930

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Another new one from Arcadia (the South Carolina-based publisher of photo-heavy local histories) is Lost Steel Plants of the Monongahela River Valley ($22.99), Robert S. Dorsett’s 95-pager documenting Big Steel’s corpse. These photos were shot mostly in the 1980s, after most of the plants had been idled. The book chronicles not the powerhouse that once produced half the nation’s steel, but an industry’s painful, protracted erasure. You’ll see U.S. Steel’s Duquesne blast furnaces, whole but dormant, then witness it undergoing demolition. This isn’t ruin porn. Partly because Dorsett favors wide, matter-of-fact framing (and partly because some photos have printed up rather dark), few images are conventionally picturesque. But what resonates is the vast scale of, say, U.S Steel’s Homestead Works — a scale illegible now that even Big Steel’s ruins have been supplanted by office parks and retail playgrounds. A favorite image: the once-mighty Carrie blast furnaces, laying crumpled as mushrooms left too long on the sill. Other bits of Brobdingnagian litter — like a towering set of industrial tongs — suggest these leavings as some giant’s discarded toys. Which, in some sense, they were. Dorsett will sign copies of Lost Steel Plants from 1-4 p.m. Sat., Dec. 19, at the Monroeville Mall Barnes & Noble. 412-8560369 or www.stores.barnesandnoble.com

INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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for the NEW SEMESTER

Students, ages 3-18, at Pittsburgh CLO Academy can choose from tap, ballet, hip hop, musical theater, voice, acting, piano & more!

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Julia Cooper | Photo by Archie Carpenter

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January 23-March 19 Performs on March 19 at The CAPA Theater *Must also be enrolled in 2 classes or a package during the Spring Semester.

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O’REILLY THEATER

{PHOTO COURTESY OF TAMI DIXON}

Sheila McKenna in Yinz’r Scrooged, at Bricolage

[PLAY REVIEWS]

SCROOGE LOOSED {BY TED HOOVER} ’TIS THE SEASON when local theater com-

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panies drag out the red felt, holly leaves and holiday theatrical warhorses, toss them onstage and celebrate the season … while, not coincidently, making a little year-end book-balancing cash. Bricolage, as usual, mixes it up by serving Charles Dickens with a unique twist. Yinz’r Scrooged is a contemporary Christmas Carol set in Pittsburgh and adapted by Tami Dixon and Sam Turich for the troupe’s Midnight Radio series (staged readings presented in the style of radio plays). I expected a gag-filled spoof of local people and events, which Yinz’r Scrooged certainly is, but I’m pleasantly surprised that Dixon and Turich went beyond easy jokes and offered some depth. Ebenezer Scrooge is now Jebenezer, running a large, UPMCtype corporation, and his bank balance is as large as his heart is small. The writers have a lot of fun spinning Victorian characters and attitudes into recognizable Pittsburgh memes. But they refuse to sentimentalize Dickens’ socialist ideals, and they have Jebenezer furiously denounce unionizing attempts and belittle the Fight for $15 campaign. Amid all the laughs the show

generates, and it’s a lot, I could feel pockets of neo-economical unease in the audience. Dickens would have been very happy. As usual with the Midnight Radio series, the talent on display is top-notch — musicians James Rushin with George Elliot and Kira Bokalders (the Bah Humbugs) are a constant joy, and the five-person cast is delightful. Howard Elson is a terrific Jebenezer, expertly lacing his comic villain with a hard-edged bitterness. Lissa Brennan is amazing employing several different versions of a Pittsburgh accent; her terminally bored soup-kitchen functionary is a hoot. (Brennan is a frequent CP contributor.)

MIDNIGHT RADIO: YINZ’R SCROOGED continues through Sat., Dec. 19. Bricolage Productions, 937 Liberty Ave., Downtown. $25-35. 412-471-0999 or www.bricolagepgh.com

Sheila McKenna, as she’s proved so often, is one of our city’s most outstanding comedians and wrings laughs out of even the simplest line … which she does again and again. Matching her on every level is Connor McCanlus, whose pathetically doomed “Tiny Tony” is gloriously unhinged. And Michael McBurney’s affectionate parody of Mister Rogers as the Ghost of Christmas Past was, for me, the evening’s highlight. As they say in the show: “God bless yinz, everyone.” I N F O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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Tim, you’ll find something to love in this hilarious ode to the holidays.

A-CAROLING {BY GWENDOLYN KISTE}

I N F O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

CHRISTMAS: A TIME for family and the usu-

al sappy entertainment. Sounds simple, right? The founders of the small nonprofit theater at the center of Inspecting Carol think so. They plan to capitalize on the all-pervading joy of the season with their annual production of A Christmas Carol. However, this year’s a little different: Thanks to waning subscriptions, the theater might have to close its doors for good if director Zorah (Mary Meyer) and her motley cast can’t impress the inspector from the National Endowment for the Arts and earn a make-or-break grant that will keep the company afloat. What follows is a behind-the-scenes comedy of errors with sharp dialogue and nonstop humor, a sort of Noises Off for the Christmas set. In a new production at Little Lake Theatre, director Jena Oberg makes the most of the feverish 12-person cast. From Art DeConciliis’s manically pitch-perfect turn as Larry, the company’s temperamental Scrooge, to Jenny Malarkey as M.J., the beleaguered (and overly giggly) stage manager, there isn’t a weak performance in the house.

INSPECTING CAROL continues through Sat., Dec. 19. Little Lake Theatre, 500 Lakeside Drive, Canonsburg. $12-20. 724-745-6300 or littlelake.org

Though the setup is simple and wellworn, with mistaken identities and plenty of physicality, Inspecting Carol straddles two almost impossible goals: catering to those who yearn for the same festive pastimes each December and giving a wink and nod to those who are tired of the holiday’s maudlin diversions. It succeeds on both accounts. Originally written and performed at The Seattle Repertory Theatre, this 1991 play could easily have become dated by now. But in a climate where arts programs are always first on the government chopping block, Daniel J. Sullivan’s script is every bit as relevant today as when it debuted. Add in modern audiences more than a little weary of red Starbucks cups and Black Friday shopping frenzies, and Inspecting Carol celebrates and lampoons Christmas traditions in equal measure. So whether you’re a traditionalist who demands the family watch White Christmas and sing carols on repeat every year, or a seasonal curmudgeon who couldn’t care less about the fate of Tiny

BASIC BARD {BY GERARD STANLEY HORNBY} PITTSBURGH CLASSIC Players’ Macbeth,

at The Maker Theater, is a production stripped to its basics on a minimalist set. That makes the thrust stage a podium for some of Sheakespeare’s most immortal lines. And that’s just what director Johnny Adkins does best here, simply allowing the audience access to a solid delivery of some truly great pieces of text.

MACBETH continues through Sat., Dec 19. Pittsburgh Classic Players at The Maker Theater, 5950 Ellsworth Ave., Shadyside. $15. 412-404-2695 or www.themakertheater.com

Performing a Shakespearean tragedy (even one edited, as this one is, for length) is no easy feat, but Brett Sullivan Santry takes on the lead role as the flawed thane with strength. He swaggers across the stage, delivering his words with a punch. This focus is particularly welcome when compared to some other passages in the show; the witches’ scenes, for instance, had me checking my program for David Lynch’s name in the credits. Neither did the rest of the audience seem to know what was going during such sequences. With contemporary popular culture infused by such dramas of politics and power as Game of Thrones and House of Cards, it’s a lot of fun to go back and see where all this started. And in Macbeth, the back-stabbing is very real. As Adkins writes in the program, “In spite of the supernatural phenomenon …, what this play comes down to is the choices made by one man”— one man and his twisted relationship with power and glory. Again, this is where the production’s reliance on dialogue over staging is used to its best effect. Some of Shakespeare’s most insightful and profound words are spoken on that stage, including “Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player / That struts and frets his hour upon the stage / And then is heard no more.” This is a small, low-key production, and has a local feel thanks to the the intimate venue. Shadyside’s out-of-the-way Maker Theater is modestly appointed, but in this there’s potential for something cozy and inviting, and the audience should enjoy a fun, no-nonsense production of this winter warmer.

www.wizardofozthemusical.com

JANUARY 6-11 • HEINZ HALL TRUSTARTS.ORG • BOX OFFICE AT THEATER SQUARE LOCAL INFO HERE

412-392-4900 • GROUPS 10+ TICKETS 412-471-6930 PNC Broadway In Pittsburgh is a presentation of the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust, Pittsburgh Symphony and Broadway Across America.

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FOR THE WEEK OF

12.1712.24.15

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO SUBMIT LISTINGS AND PRESS RELEASES, CALL 412.316.3342 X161. DEC. 22 Rudolph ph h Th The Re R Red-Nosed d Reindeer: The Musical

+ THU., DEC. 17 {STAGE} Here’s a locally sourced musical version of A Christmas Carol that dates to 1991. That was the year Ken and Jane Gargaro debuted A Lyrical Christmas Carol, which delivers Dickens’ classic story with Christmas carols and the music of Bach, Mozart and more. In this production by Pittsburgh Musical Theater, Jennifer Lybarger directs a cast headed by Brady David Pasty as Scrooge. The four performances at the New Hazlett Theater begin with tonight’s. Bill O’Driscoll 7:30 p.m. Continues through Sun., Dec. 20. 6 Allegheny Square East, North Side. $1020. 412-539-0900, x232 or www.pittsburghmusicals.com

{BURLESQUE} Burlesque dancers, contortionists, hula hoopers, stripping puppets — maybe it’s a new holiday tradition. Or so hopes the Tease-a-gogo Christmas tour. This package of burlesque and circus-style variety acts is branching out from its home base in Lansing, Mich., for a regional swing. The show features go-go Amy, from The Pretty Things Peepshow, The Vivacious Miss

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

Audacious, Lil Miss Firefly, puppetmaster Matt Scott of Rasputin’s Marionettes, local guest Kat De Lac and your host, Naughty Audie. The tour stops tonight at The Smiling Moose. BO 10 p.m. 1306 E. Carson St., South Side. $10. www.smilingmoose.com

+ FRI., DEC. 18 {ARCHITECTURE} The city Office of Public Art’s series of monthly walking

DEC. 18

Assorted Dances

tours continues with North Side Walking Tour: Stained Glass. The hour-long guided walk focuses on two landmark churches — Calvary United Methodist Church and Emmanuel Episcopal Church — in historic Allegheny West, with work by famed architect H.H. Richardson and windows by Louis Comfort Tiffany. The tour starts at Calvary and includes commentary by the Rev. Larry Homitsky, conservator Kirk Weaver and Father Don Youse. BO Noon-1 p.m. 971 Beech Ave., North Side. $8-10. 412-391-2060, x237 or www.pittsburghartscouncil.org

{DANCE} Moriah Ella Mason’s “sex werque” explores “the aesthetics and emotions of erotic dance.” In “El Eswitch,” Laura Stokes uses both Latin and modern-dance vocabularies to examine cultural identity. Experimental musician Brian Hecht and interdisciplinary artist Ceci Ebitz offer a multi-sensorial collaborative exchange involving “physical translations of a castor-oil hair mask.” And Darcy Shaffner performs “a riotous Dada experiment with flagrant disregard of the fourth wall.” It’s all in a night’s work for


sp otlight If you know Kevin McDonald only as a founding member of The Kids in the Hall sketch-comedy troupe, or even from his roles on TV shows including That ’70s Show, his debut Pittsburgh appearance will throw a couple curves. One, he’ll do standup, which he first attempted only a few years ago, while looking to keep busy in his new home in Winnipeg, Manitoba. It’s a sketch-comedy kind of standup, partly done in character as “a guy doing standup who’s having trouble doing standup,” McDonald says by phone from Winnipeg. Second curve: McDonald’s Dec. 19 “variety show,” at Arcade Comedy Theater, will include not only an improv set with Arcade regulars, but also sketches developed with students in his day-long sketch-writing and improv workshop. Having traveled around teaching such classes for a few years, he’s learned that the secret is “how easy it is” — pretty much just improv by another name. Recalling that the Kids themselves began as a stage act, in the 1980s, McDonald says that his favorite part of his shows is featuring the creativity he’s just nurtured. “Creating something from scratch, and doing it that night in front of a live audience is like the most exciting thing,” he says. But you’ll still get plenty of McDonald: “I’ll be hogging the stage, don’t worry!” Bill O’Driscoll 8 p.m. Sat., Dec. 19. 811 Liberty Ave., Downtown. $20. www.arcadecomedytheater.com

Christmas,” sung by Pittsburgh native and The Voice finalist Chris Jamison. Other guests on the program of carols, holiday faves and seasonal orchestral pieces include Christopher Sanders, and The Three Rivers Ringers handbell choir. BO 2:30 and 8 p.m. Also 2:30 p.m. Sun., Dec. 20. 600 Penn Ave., Downtown. $24-99. 412-392-4900 or www.pittsburghsymphony.org

Assorted Dances, a program of new experimental pieces, with two showings tonight at Bunker Projects. Seating is limited; a chocolate reception follows each show. BO 6 and 8 p.m. 5106 Penn Ave., Bloomfield. $7.50-10. www.bunkerprojects.org

{COMEDY} Everyone knows that everything’s funnier when you’re drunk. (Well, except for Donald Trump, who’s not funny when you’re sober, either.) But tonight’s late show at Club Café, the latest in the Race to the Coffin Comedy series, is called Comedy Roulette: Drunk Comedy Holiday Edition. Presumably, that means that it’s the comics, rather than the audience, who’ll be tipsy. But you’re about to find out, with John Dick Winters hosting a line-up including Alex Stypula, Matt Light, James J. Hamilton and Ray Zawodni. BO 10:30 p.m. 56 12th St., South Side. $5 (21 and over). 866-468-3401 or www.clubcafelive.com

chain has re-animated the old East Liberty YMCA, where Harris shot some of the photos to be exhibited, including “The Davenport Sisters band posed in YMCA, 1962” (pictured). Tonight’s reception features presentations by the Carnegie’s Teenie Harris Archive specialist, Charlene Foggie-Barnett, poet Tameka Cage Conley and historian and author John M. Brewer, with music from Idasa

19 EC.. 19 DEC

cus: East Liberty in Fo s ph ra og ot Ph e Th of Teenie Harris

including Adam Levine, Amy Mmhmm, Sarah Halter and Jeremy Caywood — accompany a special holiday menu no less tasty, also including an herbivore omelet (with cranberrries, carrots, caramelized onion, rosemary and brie) and chicken and waffles with rosemary-sage turkey gravy. Menu items are the standard price; bring a nonperishable food item or two to donate to the Greater Pittsburgh Food Bank. BO 10 a.m.3 p.m. 4207 Butler St., Lawrenceville. 412-6814318 or www.hambones pittsburgh.com

Solstice Stroll. With any luck, this moderately paced fourmile hike through the woods of Hartwood Acres will provide some good stargazing of its own, along with the sounds of nocturnal forest-dwellers. It’s also the final Venture Outdoors event of the calendar year. BO 6:30-8:30 p.m. 200 Hartwood Acres, Allison Park. $10. Register at www.ventureoutdoors.org.

DEC. 17

Tease-a-gogo

{ART}

Photo by Charles “Teenie” Harris

+ SAT., DEC. 19 {MUSIC} It’s the second and final weekend for holiday tunes done big by the Pittsburgh Symphony Orchestra and friends. At the Highmark Holiday Pops, hear everything from Handel’s “Hallelujah Chorus,” by the Mendelssohn Choir of Pittsburgh, and selections from The Nutcracker, to Donny Hathaway’s “This

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{ART} The brand-new Ace Hotel Pittsburgh hosts the opening of East Liberty in Focus: The Photographs of Teenie Harris. The exhibition spotlighting work by the legendary Pittsburgh Courier photographer is a partnership with the Carnegie Museum of Art, which holds Harris’ archive — a chronicle of African-American life at mid-century that’s likely unmatched in scope. The show is doubly apt because the international boutique-hotel

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Tariq, Jacquea Mae and DJ Soy Sos. BO 7 p.m. 120 S. Whitfield Ave., East Liberty. Free. www.acehotel.com.

Fresh off an artist residency in Providence, R.I., and now doing a year-long residency at the Carnegie Mellon School of Art, D.S. Kinsell opens a solo show at Fieldwork Contemporary Gallery. A Place in Mind includes both new paintings — landscapes that Kinsell calls “galactic portals” — and photo-collage screenprints curated by Janera Solomon. Kinsell is also the co-founder of nearby BOOM Concepts artspace. Today’s reception is free. BO 2-5 p.m. 4925 Penn Ave., Garfield. RSVP to info@ fieldworkgallery.com.

+ SUN., DEC. 20 + TUE., DEC. 22 {FOOD}

How about some live acoustic tunes with your eggnog French toast? Just for today, Hambones yules up its weekly acoustic brunch as the Hambones Holiday Miracle on 42nd Street Acoustic Brunch Special. Performances by 15 or more local musicians —

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and Milwaukee’s First Stage, debuted in 2013, a reproduction of that Rankin-Bass show complete with Rudolph, Hermey the Elf and Yukon Cornelius, and faithful down to the costumes and songs (“Have a Holly Jolly Christmas,” et al.). Its 47-city North American tour comes to Heinz Hall courtesy of PNC Broadway in Pittsburgh and the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust.

{STAGE}

{OUTDOORS}

Given that it’s arguably the most popular TV Christmas special ever, it’s no surprise that 1964’s stop-action-animated Rudolph The Red-Nose Reindeer has come to the stage. Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer: The Musical, directed and conceived by Jeff Frank

Between the super-moon eclipse and the usual season meteor showers, it’s been a pretty good year, astronomically speaking. Then there’s tonight: the longest night of the year, and time for Venture Outdoors’ Winter

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Who could deny its charms? Certainly no one who’s ever said, “Misfit Toys — c’est moi.” The eight family-friendly performances (including four matinees) begin tonight. BO 7 p.m. Continues through Dec. 27. 600 Penn Ave., Downtown. $26-62. 412-3924900 or www.trustarts.org

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{ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS 412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X165 (PHONE)

THEATER ALTAR BOYZ. Meet Matthew,

Ugly Christmas Sweater Party Friday, December 18 th

$2.50

BUD LIGHT

| $3 FIREBALL SPECIALS

Best of show wins a prize!

JEKYL AND HYDE | 140 S. 18TH STREET Like Lik ikke Us! Us!!

412-488-0777 | BARSMART.COM/JEKYLANDHYDE

Mark, Luke, Juan & Abraham – aka the ALTAR BOYZ. They’re on a mission from above to put the “pop” back in piety, wooing legions of bingo hall & pancake breakfast fans throughout their “Raise the Praise” tour. Sun, 2 p.m., Sat, 2 & 7:30 p.m. and Wed-Fri, 7:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 20. Backstage Bar at Theatre Square, Downtown. 412-323-4709. BEAUTY & THE BEAST HOLIDAY. Presented by Gemini Theater Company. Belle & the Beast spend a magical winter holiday together as the Beast learns the true meaning of the season. Sat, Sun, 11 a.m. & 1:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 27. Latitude 360, North Fayette. 412-693-5555. THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER. A tale of the Herdman Family, whose kids were without a doubt the worst children in the history of the world. Sat, Sun, 1:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 19. Little Lake Theatre, Canonsburg. 724-745-6300.

Go on a scavenger hunt, hear Etta Cox croon, and look through Teenie Harris’ lens. Podcast goes live every Thursday at www.pghcitypaper.com

FEARLESS: A SHEPHERD’S SCARED OF SARAH. Lily & STORY. The Brown Chapel Sam, an upwardly-mobile Heir Force presents this original young urban couple, are in music-filled play. Tue., Dec. 22, crisis mode. Lily’s pregnant & 7 p.m. New Hazlett Theater, Sam is stuck in a panic that rings North Side. 412-320-4610. entirely true: they owe more INSPECTING CAROL. A small than a hundred thousand theater company is rehearsing dollars – how will they support a for its umpteenth production baby? Fri, Sat, 8 p.m. Thru of A Christmas Carol when Dec. 19. Carnegie Stage, something happens to shake up Carnegie. 724-873-3576. the production. Thu-Sat, YINZ’R SCROOGED. A 8 p.m. Thru Dec. 19. Pittsburgh-flavored holiday Little Lake Theatre, tale to finish Midnight Canonsburg. Radio’s 7th Season. 724-745-6300. Family-friendly MACBETH. The classic comedy parodying ww. r w Shakespeare play. Charles Dickens’ pape pghcitym Thu-Sat, 8 p.m. Thru classic holiday story, .co Dec. 19. The Maker A Christmas Carol. Theater, Shadyside. Thu-Sat, 8 p.m. 412-404-2695. Thru Dec. 21. Bricolage, THE MARVELOUS Downtown. 412-471-0999. WONDERETTES. A musical takes that takes you to 1958 prom. Fri, Sat, 8 p.m. and Sun, 2 p.m. Thru Dec. 20. The Theatre Factory, Trafford. 412-374-9200. COMEDY ROULETTE: DRUNK OLIVER TWIST. An adaption COMEDY HOLIDAY EDITION. of the Charles Dickens story. Alex Stypula, Matt Light, James J. Wed-Sat, 8 p.m. Thru Dec. 20. Hamilton, Ray Zawodni. Hosted Stephen Foster Memorial, by Dick Winters.10 p.m. Club Cafe, Oakland. 412-561-6000. South Side. 412-431-4950.

FULL LIST ONLINE

COMEDY FRI 18

[TOURS]

HO HO HO! COMEDY NIGHT. Feat. Sharon Daly, Frank Perman & Chris Kemp. For audiences ages 18+. 7 p.m. Shaler North Hills Library, Glenshaw. 412-486-0211. MIKE WYSOCKI CHRISTMAS COMEDY SPECIAL. W/ Terry Jones & Mike Sasson. 8 p.m. Oaks Theater, Oakmont. 412-828-6322.

SAT 19 KEVIN MCDONALD COMEDY SHOW. Original member of The Kids in the Hall sketch comedy troupe presents a night of improv & sketch. 8 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown. 412-339-0608.

MON 21 COMEDY SAUCE SHOWCASE. Local & out-of-town comedians. Mon, 9 p.m. Pleasure Bar, Bloomfield. 412-682-9603. OPEN MIC COMEDY NIGHT. Mon, 10 p.m. Lava Lounge, South Side. 412-431-5282.

TUE 22 ALI SPAGNOLA’S POWER HOUR - DRINKING GAME CONCERT W/ THE NERD HERDERS. 7 p.m. Club Cafe, South Side. 412-431-4950.

WED 23 THE HOLIDAY COMEDY SHOW W/ MIKE TRAVERS, JEFF KONKLE, HOSTED BY TIM ROSS. 7 p.m. Club Cafe, South Side. 412-431-4950.

EXHIBITS ALLEGHENY-KISKI VALLEY

{PHOTO COURTESY OF PITTSBURGH TOURS & MORE}

Pittsburgh is on its way to being a food and restaurant lover’s dream. With the opening of countless restaurants and increasing national attention from writers, bloggers and chefs, there are more new flavors to explore every day. Join Pittsburgh Tours & More for a look at (and taste of) local eateries and hear the stories behind them in the ongoing series Flavor of Pittsburgh: Pittsburgh Popular Food Culture Tour. 10 a.m.-1:30 p.m., various dates. 23 Market Square, Downtown. $80. www.pghtoursandmore.net

HERITAGE MUSEUM. Military artifacts & exhibits on the Allegheny Valley’s industrial heritage. Tarentum. 724-224-7666. ANDREW CARNEGIE FREE LIBRARY MUSIC HALL. Capt. Thomas Espy Room Tour. The Capt. Thomas Espy Post 153 of the Grand Army of the Republic served local Civil War veterans for over 54 years & is the best preserved & most intact GAR post in the United States. Carnegie. 412-276-3456. BAYERNHOF MUSEUM. Large collection of automatic roll-played musical instruments & music boxes in a mansion setting. Call for appointment. O’Hara. 412-782-4231. BOST BUILDING. Collectors. Preserved materials reflecting the industrial heritage of Southwestern PA. Homestead. 412-464-4020. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART. The Propeller Group: The Living CONTINUES ON PG. 44

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FIND LABATT BLUE & BLUE LIGHT SPECIALS NEAR YOU DURING ALL PENS GAMES ON THE CP HAPPS APP!

VISUAL

LETS GO PENS!

ART

“Unicorn Dream” (vinyl, mixed media derived from original CG animation, 2014), by Randi Cohn. From the exhibition, Benevolent Creatures, at Bantha Tea Bar, Garfield.

NEW THIS WEEK ACE HOTEL PITTSBURGH. East Liberty In Focus: The Photographs of Teenie Harris. An exhibit of a few curated photographs from CMOA collection. Opening reception December 19, 7 p.m. w/ bands, refreshments, more. East Liberty. 412-361-3300. BANTHA TEA BAR. Benevolent Creatures. An exhibition of 18 Stormtrooper helmets reimagined by artists across The Walt Disney Company, including Lucasfilm, Industrial Light & Magic, Marvel & Pixar. The iconic Star Wars helmets began as 6 inch white vinyl derived from the original CG animation file & have been redesigned into new benevolent creatures. Opening December 18. Penn Hills. 412-404-8359.

ONGOING 937 LIBERTY AVE. Humanae/ I AM AUGUST. A series of photographs of everyday Pittsburghers by Angelica Dass. Downtown. 412-338-8742. ANDY WARHOL MUSEUM. Warhol By The Book. An exhibition on Warhol’s book work, from early studentwork illustrations to his commercial work in the 50s. Permanent collection. Artwork & artifacts by the famed Pop Artist. North Side. 412-237-8300. ARTDFACT. Artdfact Gallery. The works of Timothy Kelley & other regional & US artists on display. Sculpture, oil & acrylic paintings, mixed media, found objects, more. North Side. 724-797-3302.

ARTISTS IMAGE RESOURCE. Printwork 2015. Feat. prints created by 22 artists from around the country, the exhibition features innovative techniques combined w/ solid conceptual thinking. North Side. 412-321-8664. BOCK-TOTT GALLERY. 5 Artists: A Collection of Works. Works in various mediums by Brandy Bock-Tott, Jeffrey Phelps, Linda Breen, Joyce Werwie Perry & Cindy Engler. Sewickley. 412-519-3377. BOXHEART GALLERY. No Boundaries: Work by The Pittsburgh Group. Main gallery. The Watcher The Watched. Work by Kyle Ethan Fischer, Carolyn Reed Barritt, Irina Koukhanova, Danny Licul, & Sherry Rusinack. Bloomfield. 412-687-8858. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART. HACLab Pittsburgh: Imagining the Modern. An exhibition of over, under architecture highlighting successive histories of pioneering architectural successes, disrupted neighborhoods & the utopian aspirations & ideals of public officials & business leaders. Silver to Steel: The Modern Designs of Peter Muller-Munk. Displaying the work of 60s German emigre & Pittsburgh industrial design Peter Muller-Munk, who started as a silversmith at Tiffany’s. Oakland. 412-622-3131. CHRISTINE FRECHARD GALLERY. Compensatory Dreaming. Works by Dean Cercone. Squirrel Hill. 412-421-8888. CHROMOS EYEWEAR. Steel Mills Past & Present: Lithography by Keith Clouse. Black and

white imagery of both working and decaying mills and the people who worked in them translated through lithography printing. Presented in conjunction w/ Carolyn Pierotti of Purple Room Fine Arts. Lawrenceville. 412-477-4540. CRAZY MOCHA COFFEE COMPANY. Glowstick Burn Unit: A Series of Collages by Brian DiSanto. Selections spanning the last 5 years of Brian’s album art, fliers, & other spastic jolts of fun. Glowstick Burn Unit. A series of collages by Brian DiSanto. Bloomfield. 412-681-5225. EAST OF EASTSIDE GALLERY. Eastside Outside. Landscape paintings & print by Adrienne Heinrich, Debra Platt, Phiris Kathryn Sickels, Sue Pollins & Kathleen Zimbicki. Forest Hills. 412-465-0140. ECLECTIC ART & OBJECTS GALLERY. 19th century American & European paintings combined w/ contemporary artists & their artwork. The Hidden Collection. Watercolors by Robert N. Blair (1912- 2003). Hiromi Traditional Japanese Oil Paintings The Lost Artists of the 1893 Chicago Exhibition. Collectors Showcase. Emsworth. 412-734-2099. ESPRESSO A MANO. The Whole Kit & Caboodle. Feat. quirky cats & whimsical floral acrylic paintings by Maura Taylor. Lawrenceville. 412-918-1864. FRAMEHOUSE. Except For The Sound of my Voice: Photogravures by Leslie A. Golomb. Feat. selections from Wielding the Knife, woodcuts by Master Chinese Printmaker, Li Kang. Lawrenceville. 412-586-4559. CONTINUES ON PG. 44

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{PHOTO BY LISA CUNNINGHAM}

*Stuff We Like

Randita’s African Peanut Stew Lightly spiced with a sweet potato base and topped with peanuts, this tasty stew is both hearty and meat-free. The organic vegan cafe serves it up from its food truck and at its Saxonburg and Aspinwall locations. www.randitas.com

Market Square’s Santa Claus

{PHOTO BY ASHLEY MURRAY}

The real Santa works out of Market Square’s Holiday Market. Donate to the Greater Pittsburgh Community Food Bank in exchange for a photo. www.downtownpittsburgh.com/holidays

Spool A new fabric and sewing-supply store in the burgeoning Allentown business district. Shop for yardage, take a class or use the studio to sew by the hour. 816 Warrington Ave.

St. Nikolaus Bock Bier This Penn Brewery libation is great for the holiday season — and beyond if you want to squirrel some away for the dark abyss that is January and February. Dark and bold, with a hints of sweetness and a bitter finish.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

Need Light, the Dead Need Music. A video based exhibition that looks at colorful, spirited funeral traditions in Vietnam & New Orleans. Oakland. 412-622-3131. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY. Animal Secrets. Learn about the hidden lives of ants, bats, chipmunks, raccoons & more. Out of This World! Jewelry in the Space Age. A fine jewelry exhibition that brings together scientific fact & pop culture in a showcase of wearable & decorative arts related to outer space, space travel, the space age, & the powerful influence these topics have had on human civilization. Dinosaurs in Their Time. Displaying immersive environments spanning the Mesozoic Era & original fossil specimens. Permanent. Hall of Minerals & Gems. Crystal, gems & precious stones from all over the world. Population Impact. How humans are affecting the environment. Oakland. 412-622-3131. CARNEGIE SCIENCE CENTER. H2Oh! Experience kinetic water-driven motion & discover the relations between water, land & habitat. How do everyday decisions impact water supply & the environment? Ongoing: Buhl Digital Dome (planetarium), Miniature Railroad & Village, USS Requin submarine & more. North Side. 412-237-3400. CENTER FOR POSTNATURAL HISTORY. Explore the complex interplay between culture, nature & biotechnology. Sundays 12-4. Garfield. 412-223-7698. CHILDREN’S MUSEUM OF PITTSBURGH. Voyage to Vietnam. An immersive exhibit celebrating the Vietnamese Tet Festival. North Side. 412-322-5058. COMPASS INN. Demos & tours w/ costumed guides feat. this restored stagecoach stop. North Versailles. 724-238-4983. DEPRECIATION LANDS MUSEUM. Small living history museum celebrating the settlement & history of the Depreciation Lands. Allison Park. 412-486-0563. FALLINGWATER. Tour the famed Frank Lloyd Wright house. Mill Run. 724-329-8501. FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH. Tours of 13 Tiffany stained-glass windows. Downtown. 412-471-3436. FORT PITT MUSEUM. Captured by Indians: Warfare & Assimilation on the 18th Century Frontier. During the mid-18th century, thousands of settlers of European & African descent were captured by Native Americans. Using documentary evidence from 18th & early 19th century sources, period imagery, & artifacts from public & private collections in the U.S. and Canada, the exhibit examines the practice of captivity

VISUAL ART

CONTINUED FROM PG. 43

FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. Forbidden Fruit. Porcelain figurines in the 18th century style by Chris Antemann. Permanent collection of European Art. Point Breeze. 412-371-0600. GALLERIE CHIZ. Trip the Light Fantastic! Holiday Show. Work by Doreen Baskin, Peter Calaboyias, Manuela Holban, Thomas Kelly, Bill Miller, Ellen Chisdes Neuberg, Cory Rockwood, Bruce Senchesen & Marike Vuga. Shadyside. 412-441-6005. THE GALLERY 4. An Occasional Dream. Interactive mixed media works, enhanced w/ a free smartphone app by Erin Ko. Shadyside. 412-363-5050. GALLERY ON 43RD STREET. Addicted to Trash. Assemblage & metal collage by Robert Villamagna. Lawrenceville. 412-683-6488. GLENN GREENE STAINED GLASS STUDIO INC. Original Glass Art by Glenn Greene. Exhibition of new work, recent work & older work. Regent Square. 412-243-2772. HOLOCAUST CENTER, UNITED JEWISH FEDERATION. In Celebration of Life: Living Legacy Project. A photographic/ multimedia exhibit honoring & commemorating local Holocaust survivors. Squirrel Hill. 412-421-1500. IMAGE BOX GALLERY. Birthday Parties. Collaborative Works by Marcy Gerhart & Katelyn Gould. Garfield. 412-441-0930. JEWISH COMMUNITY CENTER. Jane Haskell: Drawing in Light. An exhibition of 30 sculptures, paintings & drawings by the artist. Squirrel Hill. 412-521-8010. MALL AT ROBINSON. Digital Designs: Showcase of Student Design Work. Robinson. 412-788-0816. MATTRESS FACTORY. Factory Installed. Artists Anne Lindberg, John Morris, Julie Schenkelberg, Jacob Douenias, Ethan Frier, Rob Voerman, Bill Smith, Lisa Sigal & Marnie Weber created new room-sized installations that demonstrate a uniquely different approach to the creative process. Ongoing Installations. Works by Turrell, Lutz, Shiota, Kusama, Anastasi, Highstein, Wexler & Woodrow. North Side. 412-231-3169. MORGAN CONTEMPORARY GLASS GALLERY. parallel-

from its prehistoric roots to its reverberations in modern Native-, African- & Euro-American communities. Reconstructed fort houses museum of Pittsburgh history circa French & Indian War & American Revolution. Downtown. 412-281-9285.

genres. Christine Barney, John Burton, Granite Calimpong, Bernie D’Onofrio, Jen Elek, Saman Kalantari, David Lewin, David Royce, Margaret Spacapan & Cheryl Wilson Smith exploring an interconnected set of parameters through different genres. Shadyside. 412-441-5200. NEU KIRCHE CONTEMPORARY ART CENTER. Like a Body Without Skin. Work by Fiona Amundsen addressing the relationships between steel manufacturing industries & their mobilization into a united national front that produced everything from planes to bombs during WWII. North Side. 412-322-2224. PANZA GALLERY. Fusion. An exhibition showcasing two artists, Christianna Kreiss & George Kollar, using unique forms of photography. Millvale. 412-821-0959. PHIPPS CONSERVATORY & BOTANICAL GARDEN. Learning for a Greener Future: A Youth Art Exhibition. Through a series of photography workshops, Phipps’ summer interns were encouraged to explore whatever crossed their paths from beautiful flowers, to people, to architecture. The teens selected their favorite pictures to display in this gallery space. The pictures demonstrate the power of communication & art through the view of a camera lens. Oakland. 412-622-6914. PITTSBURGH CENTER FOR THE ARTS. 50th Anniversary Annual Exhibition. A non-themed juried exhibition showcasing the best work of the Pittsburgh Society of Artists in all mediums. Guild Exhibitions from the Pittsburgh Society of Artists, Society of Sculptors & Group A. Work from guild members. Shadyside. 412-361-0873. PITTSBURGH FILMMAKERS. In the Air: Visualizing what we breath. Photographs that show the effects of western PA’s air quality. Oakland. 412-681-5449. PITTSBURGH GLASS CENTER. Indagare. Work by Therman Statom. Friendship. 412-365-2145. REVISION SPACE. Fired in Freedom. A group exhibition feat. ceramic artists from Northeast Ohio & Pittsburgh. 28 firings in less than four years from a single wood-fired kiln

FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. Ongoing: tours of Clayton, the Frick estate, w/ classes & programs for all ages. Point Breeze. 412-371-0600. HARTWOOD ACRES. Tour this Tudor mansion & stable complex. Enjoy hikes & outdoor

have resulted in clay objects that range from contemporary sculptures to traditional pots. Lawrenceville. 412-735-3201. SILVER EYE CENTER FOR PHOTOGRAPHY. Golden Hour: Thoughts on the Contemporary Photo Book. An exhibition of images from recent or upcoming publications, experimental installations & thoughtful & evocative sequences that add a new perspective to existing book-based projects. South Side. 412-431-1810. SOCIETY FOR CONTEMPORARY CRAFT SATELLITE GALLERY. A Very Long Engagement. The works collected in this exhibition emerge from lengthy encounters with string – whether knotted, netted, interlaced, woven or percussed. Created by six fiber artists, the works form a kind of network of linked ideas, processes, physical properties & material qualities. Downtown. 412-261-7003 x15. THE SOCIETY FOR CONTEMPORARY CRAFT. Mindful: Exploring Mental Health Through Art. More than 30 works created by 14 contemporary artists explore the impact that mental illness is having on society & the role the arts can play in helping to address these issues. Strip District. 412-261-7003. SPACE. The Mountain & the Bumblebee. An multi-artist, multimedia exhibition exploring our ideas about landscapes. Downtown. 412-325-7723. TUGBOAT PRINT SHOP. Tugboat Printshop Showroom. Open showroom w/ the artists. Fridays 10 a.m.-4 p.m. & by appt. only. Lawrenceville. 412-980-0884. WINDOWSPACE. MIXTAPE: GOD BLESS THE CHILD THAT’S GOT HIS OWN. Work by Paul Zelevansky. Downtown. 412-325-7723. WOOD STREET GALLERIES. At Home. London based artist Hetain Patel unveils the photographic series “Eva,” & a newly commissioned work for the exhibition “Jump.” Part of India in Focus showcase. Nandini Valli Muthiah. Nandini’s photography incorporates traditional ideas of popular Indian art in contemporary, everyday settings. Part of India in Focus showcase. Downtown. 412-471-5605.

activities in the surrounding park. Allison Park. 412-767-9200. HUNT INSTITUTE FOR BOTANICAL DOCUMENTATION. The Mysterious Nature of Fungi. An overview of these mysterious organisms that are found almost everywhere on this planet & are


PHOTO ANTIQUITIES the cause of both bliss & blight. MUSEUM OF PHOTOGRAPHIC Oakland. 412-268-2434. HISTORY. Displaying 660 KENTUCK KNOB. Tour the different movie cameras, other Frank Lloyd Wright house. showing pictures on glass, Mill Run. 724-329-8501. many hand-painted. The KERR MEMORIAL MUSEUM. largest display of 19th Century Tours of a restored 19th-century, photographs in America. middle-class home. Oakmont. 3-D Photos on glass plates. 412-826-9295. Peer through antique viewers MARIDON MUSEUM. for examples of 3-D effects Collection includes jade & ivory & see scores of other glass statues from China & Japan, as hand-colored transparencies. well as Meissen porcelain. Butler. North Side. 412-231-7881. 724-282-0123. PINBALL PERFECTION. MCGINLEY HOUSE & Pinball museum & players club. MCCULLY LOG HOUSE. West View. 412-931-4425. Historic homes open for tours, PITTSBURGH ZOO & PPG lectures & more. Monroeville. AQUARIUM. Home to 412-373-7794. 4,000 animals, including MOUNT PLEASANT GLASS many endangered species. MUSEUM. Bells, Bells, Bells: Highland Park. 412-665-3639. A Lenox Holiday. A collection RACHEL CARSON of Lennox Christmas bells. HOMESTEAD. A Reverence Isabella D. Stoker Graham for Life. Photos & artifacts Collection. Heritage glass from of her life & work. Springdale. her estate. Mount Pleasant. 724-274-5459. 724-547-5929. RIVERS OF STEEL NATIONAL NATIONAL AVIARY. Masters HERITAGE AREA. Exhibits of the Sky. Explore the power & on the Homestead Mill. Steel grace of the birds who rule the industry & community artifacts sky. Majestic eagles, impressive from 1881-1986. Homestead. condors, stealthy falcons and their 412-464-4020. friends take center stage! Home SENATOR JOHN HEINZ to more than 600 birds from over HISTORY CENTER. We 200 species. W/ classes, lectures, Can Do It!: WWII. demos & more. North Side. Discover how Pittsburgh 412-323-7235. affected World War II NATIONALITY & the war affected ROOMS. 29 rooms our region. Explore helping to tell the the development story of Pittsburgh’s www. per a p ty of the Jeep, produced immigrant past. pghci m o .c in Butler, PA & the University of Pittsburgh. stories behind real-life Oakland. 412-624-6000. “Rosie the Riveters” & OLD ST. LUKE’S. Pioneer local Tuskegee Airmen whose church features 1823 pipe contributions made an organ, Revolutionary War graves. unquestionable impact on Scott. 412-851-9212. the war effort. From Slavery OLIVER MILLER to Freedom. Highlight’s HOMESTEAD. This pioneer Pittsburgh’s role in the antiWhiskey Rebellion site features slavery movement. Ongoing: log house, blacksmith shop Western PA Sports Museum, & gardens. South Park. Clash of Empires, & exhibits 412-835-1554. on local history, more. Strip PENNSYLVANIA TROLLEY District. 412-454-6000. MUSEUM. Trolley rides & SEWICKLEY HEIGHTS exhibits. Includes displays, HISTORY CENTER. Museum walking tours, gift shop, commemorates Pittsburgh picnic area & Trolley Theatre. industrialists, local history. Washington. 724-228-9256. Sewickley. 412-741-4487. PHIPPS CONSERVATORY SOLDIERS & SAILORS & BOTANICAL GARDEN. MEMORIAL HALL. War in Winter Flower Show & Light the Pacific 1941-1945. Feat. Garden. Each of the changing a collection of military artifacts exhibit rooms will embody the showcasing photographs, spirit of the oft-sung holiday uniforms, shells & other tune w/ arrangements of LED related items. Military museum lights, props & seasonal favorites dedicated to honoring military such as poinsettias, amaryllis service members since the & a massive evergreen situated Civil War through artifacts & in the pond of the Victoria personal mementos. Oakland. Room. Garden Railroad. 412-621-4253. Model trains chug through ST. ANTHONY’S CHAPEL. miniature landscapes populated Features 5,000 relics of w/ living plants, whimsical props Catholic saints. North Side. & fun interactive buttons. Runs 412-323-9504. through Feb. 28. 14 indoor rooms ST. NICHOLAS CROATIAN & 3 outdoor gardens feature CATHOLIC CHURCH. Maxo exotic plants & floral displays Vanka Murals. Mid-20th from around the world. century murals depicting war, Tropical Forest Congo. An social justice & the immigrant exhibit highlighting some of experience in America. Millvale. Africa’s lushest landscapes. 412-407-2570. Oakland. 412-622-6914.

FULL LIST ONLINE

WEST OVERTON MUSEUMS. Learn about distilling & coke-making in this pre-Civil War industrial village. West Overton. 724-887-7910.

blogh.pghcitypaper.com

HOLIDAY THU 17 PITTSBURGH CHRISTMAS CAROL TOUR- DOWNTOWN. Tour includes a visit to historic churches &/or mansions & a stop for lunch. 10 a.m. Station Square. 412-323-4709.

FRI 18 PITTSBURGH CHRISTMAS CAROL TOUR - TROY HILL. Tour includes a visit to historic churches &/or mansions & a stop for lunch. 1 p.m. Station Square. 412-323-4709.

DANCE THU 17 TEASE-A-GOGO CHRISTMAS BURLESQUE. Burlesque, contortion, hula hoops, balloon swallowing, stripping puppets, more. 10 p.m. Smiling Moose, South Side. 412-431-4668.

Clicking “reload” makes the workday go faster

THU 17 - WED 23 THE NUTCRACKER. Presented by the Pittsburgh Ballet Theatre. Sun, 12 & 4:30 p.m., Sat, 2 & 7 p.m. and Thu, Fri, 7 p.m. Thru Dec. 27 Benedum Center, Downtown. 412-456-6666.

FRI 18 MCDC MODERN DANCE INTENSIVE. Dancers will learn the Marylloyd Claytor Dance Technique & do a restaging of an excerpt from the company. Live audiences welcome. Interested dancers should go to marylloydclaytor dancecompany.com to register. Fri. YWCA, Downtown. 412-391-5100.

LITERARY THU 17 BOOKS IN THE AFTERNOON: STATION ELEVEN. Lively discussions of contemporary fiction, this month’s selection is Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel. 6 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151. ENGLISH LEARNERS’ BOOK CLUB. For advanced ESL students. Presented in cooperation w/ the Greater Pittsburgh Literacy Council. Thu, 1 p.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. THE HOUR AFTER HAPPY HOUR WRITER’S WORKSHOP. Young writers & recent graduates looking for additional feedback on their work. thehourafterhappyhour.wordpress. com Thu, 7-9 p.m. Lot 17, Bloomfield. 412-687-8117.

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TUE 22 STEEL CITY SLAM. Open mic poets & slam poets. 3 rounds of 3 minute poems. Tue, 7:45 p.m. Capri Pizza and Bar, East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

EVERYONE IS A CRITIC EVENT: The Pillow Project performs

Paper Memory

WED 23

at The Space Upstairs, Point Breeze

PITTSBURGH POETRY EXCHANGE. Book discussion hosted by the Pittsburgh Poetry Exchange. This month’s meeting focuses on Robert Duncan’s “Selected Poems”. Fourth Wed of every month, 7:30 p.m. Coffee Tree Roasters, Shadyside. 412-928-9891.

CRITIC: Victoria Sterling, 22, a student from Regent Square WHEN: Sat.,

Dec. 12

KIDSTUFF I’m familiar with the performers Slowdanger, who [performer] Taylor Knight is a part of. I follow some of their performances and this one was going on for 10 days and I finally managed to come here. It’s a performance that’s mostly dance-based, but with a narrative that’s silent. I haven’t seen anything quite like this. Especially considering how it’s only one hour long, I think they did a lot with it with their time constraint. I thought [the use of projections] was the most unique part — it sort of resembled a silent film with the old projections, the film clips. They made it like you were watching a movie. I think they accomplished what they sought out to do, and they left a lot up for interpretation to the audience. It’s just about the process of living and the process of remembering, but they wanted to leave the moral for the audience to determine themselves.

THU 17 DESIGN & BUILD AFTERSCHOOL. Introducing young innovators to the engineering design process using laser cutters & 3D printers. Students will move through identifying a problem, brainstorming, prototyping & iterative design before refining their CAD skills in Autodesk & Adobe software. For students aged 12-16. Tue, Thu, 3:30-6:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 22 TechShop, East Liberty. 412-345-7182. FAMILY CRAFT ME A STORY. Story, songs, musical instruments, parachute play, bubbles & a related craft at each session. 6:30 p.m. Baldwin Borough Public Library, Baldwin. 412-885-2255.

THU 17 - FRI 18 HANDWRITTEN. Try hand lettering, sign making & handwritten letters to those you love. Thru Dec. 18 Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

FRI 18 - SUN 20 COLLABORATIVE EMBROIDERY. Embroidery crafts patterns or pictures with thread. Learn about different techniques & styles of embroidery while helping us create one big project made by all of our visitors. Dec. 18-20 Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

B Y A L E X G ORD ON

Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

SUN 20 THE AVALANCHE. Kick off our annual collaborative paper sculpture: The Avalanche w/ Gianna Paniagua in the Studio as she demonstrates her paper-cutting process. Come add a snowflake to this epic piece. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

FULL LIST ONLINE

MON 21

MAKER STORY TIME. Explore tools, materials & processes inspired by books. Listen www. per to stories read by pa pghcitym librarian-turned.co Teaching Artist Molly. Mon, 11 a.m.-12 p.m. Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058. COOKIES W/ SANTA. Cookies, crafts & holiday movies. 10 a.m.-12 p.m. Boyce Park, SNOWFLAKE WEEK. Learn about Monroeville. 724-327-0338. the art of hand-cut paper; then MERRY GRINCHMAS. add into our winter-themed, cut Grinch games, snacks, crafts paper installation. Dec. 21-24 & a “How the Grinch Stole Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, Christmas” skit. Registration North Side. 412-322-5058. required. 10:30 a.m. Baldwin Borough Public Library, Baldwin. 412-885-2255. DESIGN & BUILD AFTERSCHOOL. TRY YOUR HAND AT Introducing young innovators CALLIGRAPHY. Guest artists to the engineering design from the Guild will demonstrate process using laser cutters & their craft. Watch, learn & 3D printers. Students will move experiment w/ specialized through identifying a problem, calligraphy pens. 11 a.m.-2 p.m.

SAT 19

CHEERLEADERS PITTSBURGH 3100 LIBERTY AVENUE PITTSBURGH, PA 15201 412-281-3110

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brainstorming, prototyping & iterative design before refining their CAD skills in Autodesk & Adobe software. For students aged 12-16. Tue, Thu, 3:30-6:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 22 TechShop, East Liberty. 412-345-7182.

WED 23 SOLDERING. Design and create shapes & sculptures out of wire; then attach the pieces together via soldering, or adhering w/ the use of melted metals. Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

OUTSIDE THU 17 ADULT NATURE WALK. Naturalists guide these leisurely paced walks. Dress well for outdoor walking. Ice rink parking lot. 10 a.m.-12 p.m. North Park, Allison Park. 724-935-1766.

MON 21 - WED 23

SAT 19

TUE 22

WALKING (OR SNOWSHOEING) IN A WINTER WONDERLAND. Pre-registration is required at www.alleghenycounty.us/ parkprograms. 10 a.m.-12 p.m. Hartwood Acres, Allison Park. 412-767-9200.

WED 23 WEDNESDAY MORNING WALK. Naturalist-led, rain or shine. Wed Beechwood Farms, Fox Chapel. 412-963-6100.


OTHER STUFF THU 17 A SOTO ZEN BUDDHIST SITTING GROUP. http://city dharma.wordpress.com/schedule/ Tue, Thu Church of the Redeemer, Squirrel Hill. 412-965-9903. INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S ASSOCIATION OF PITTSBURGH. Social, cultural club of American/ international women. Thu First Baptist Church, Oakland. iwap. pittsburgh@gmail.com. RADICAL TRIVIA. Thu, 9 p.m. Smiling Moose, South Side. 412-431-4668. SMALL BUSINESS RESEARCH. 12:15 p.m. Carnegie Library, Downtown. 412-281-7141.

FRI 18 AFRICAN DANCE CLASS. Second and Third Fri of every month and Fourth and Last Fri of every month Irma Freeman Center for Imagination, Garfield. 412-924-0634. FRIDAY NIGHT CONTRA DANCE. A social, traditional American dance. No partner needed, beginners welcome, lesson at 7:30. Fri, 8 p.m. Swisshelm Park Community Center, Swissvale. 412-945-0554.

SAT 19 BEGINNER TAI CHI CLASSES. Sat, 9 a.m. Friends Meeting House, Oakland. 412-683-2669. CINEBRUNCH: IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE. 11 a.m. Oaks Theater, Oakmont. 412-828-6322. FLAVOR OF PITTSBURGH!: POPULAR FOOD CULTURE TOUR. Tour features samplings at local eateries & behind-the-scenes stories. A 3-hour tour. 10 a.m. Crazy Mocha Coffee Company, Downtown. 412-323-4709. HOLIDAY SPIRITS BREW TOUR. Visit ShuBrew, & the musicsynchronized holiday light drive-thru show & a final stop at DR Distillery. 4 p.m. Pittsburgh Public Market, Strip District. 412-323-4709. ROCK YOUR WORLD W/ FENG SHUI. 2:30 p.m. Carnegie Library, Downtown. 412-281-7141. SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670. SOUTH HILLS SCRABBLE CLUB. Free Scrabble games, all levels. Sat, 1-3 p.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. SWING CITY. Learn & practice swing dancing skills w/ the Jim Adler Band. Sat, 8 p.m. Wightman School, Squirrel Hill. 412-759-1569. TEEN READER’S THEATER. Looking for teens (grades 6 & up) to practice & perform “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” Practice, make scenery & perform in December. 1 p.m. Baldwin Borough Public Library, Baldwin. 412-885-2255.

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VOICECATCH WORKSHOP W/ KATHY AYRES. A community writing workshop & writing space provided by Chatham’s Words Without Walls program. Sat, 10 a.m.-12 p.m. Carnegie Library, East Liberty. 412-363-8232. WEST SIDE CHRISTMAS CELEBRATION. Join for a celebrity basketball game, food, toys, games, & much more. 11 a.m. American Legion Langley Post 496, Sheraden. 917-405-6412. WIGLE WHISKEY BARRELHOUSE TOURS. Sat, 12:30 & 2 p.m. Wigle Whiskey Barrel House, North Side. 412-224-2827.

SUN 20 RADICAL TRIVIA. Trivia game hosted by DJ Jared Evans. Come alone or bring a team. Sun, 7 p.m. Oaks Theater, Oakmont. 412-828-6322.

WED 23 THE PITTSBURGH SHOW OFFS. A meeting of jugglers & spinners. All levels welcome. Wed, 7:30 p.m. Union Project, Highland Park. 412-363-4550.

AUDITIONS THE THEATRE FACTORY. Auditions for the “The Odd Couple.” Cold readings from the script. December 19, 12-3 p.m & December 20, 6-9 p.m. Thru Dec. 20. Trafford. 724-374-9200.

SUBMISSIONS 2016 FARMING FOR THE FUTURE CONFERENCE. PASA Scholarship & WorkShare Applications are open for the conference. To learn more or apply, visit pasafarming.org/conference. Thru Jan. 4, 2016.

[VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITY]

HUMAN SERVICES CENTER CORPORATION

Human Services Center Corporation is seeking volunteers for its Youth Volunteer Program, held every week from 3:30-5:30 p.m., Monday through Thursday. Tasks include mentoring and helping students with their homework. All volunteers must have Act 33/34 clearances. For more information, call 412-829-7112 or email loreilly@hscc-mvpc.org.

SPECIAL NEEDS BALLROOM PROGRAM. Ballroom dance classes for adults & teens (16+) w/ cognitive disabilities. Students are paired w/ Dance Mentors (trained volunteers) who provide each student w/ the individual support & attention he or she needs to succeed. Sun, 12 p.m. Thru Dec. 20 DancExplosion Arts Center, Ross. 412-999-3998. SUNDAY MARKET. A gathering of local crafters & dealers selling unique items, from home made foodstuffs to art. Sun, 6-10 p.m. The Night Gallery, Lawrenceville. 724-417-0223.

MON 21 ROBOTO MONTHLY MEETING. Meet w/ the Roboto board of directors to find out what’s happening at the space & help guide it’s future. Third Mon of every month, 7 p.m. The Mr. Roboto Project, B loomfield. 412-853-0518. SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670.

TUE 22 A SOTO ZEN BUDDHIST SITTING GROUP. http://city dharma.wordpress.com/schedule/ Tue, Thu Church of the Redeemer, Squirrel Hill. 412-965-9903.

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BOULEVARD GALLERY & DIFFERENT STROKES GALLERY. Searching for glass artists, fiber artists, potters, etc. to compliment the exhibits for 2015 & 2016. Booking for both galleries for 2017. Exhibits run from 1 to 2 months. Ongoing. 412-721-0943. THE HOUR AFTER HAPPY HOUR REVIEW. Seeking submissions in all genres for fledgling literary magazine curated by members of the Hour After Happy Hour Writing Workshop. afterhappy hourreview.com Ongoing. INDEPENDENT FILM NIGHT. Submit your film, 10 minutes or less. Screenings held on the second Thursday of every month. Ongoing. DV8 Espresso Bar & Gallery, Greensburg. 724-219-0804. THE NEW YINZER. Seeking original essays about literature, music, TV or film, & also essays generally about Pittsburgh. To see some examples, visit www. newyinzer.com & view the current issue. Email all pitches, submissions & inquiries to newyinzer@gmail. com. Ongoing. PITTSBURGH POETRY REVIEW. Seeking submissions of no less than 3 & no more than 5 poems. Interested in series’ & linked poems. For more information, visit www.pittsburghpoetryreview.com. Thru Jan. 15, 2016. THE POET BAND COMPANY. Seeking various types of poetry. Contact wewuvpoetry@hotmail. com Ongoing.

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Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

blogh.pghcitypaper.com

Work yourself into a lather. Rinse. Repeat.

I’m a straight 26-year-old man who wants advice on helping my fiancée realize a particular fantasy. We have been dating for three years and are in a happy monogamous relationship. I was always vanilla, but she enjoys rougher sex and light bondage. We’ve incorporated some of this into our sex lives, and we are both happy with how fun it is. She has expressed interest in a rape fantasy. Both of us want to be safe when we do this, and we trust each other completely. But I cannot think of a way in which she can get the experience she desires while still maintaining a safe dynamic. I am wondering if you have advice on how I can help act out her fantasy in a way that we both have fun. SEEKING EROTIC ADVICE NOW

You and the fiancée are obviously capable of communicating about varsity-level sex play, SEAN; your track record with bondage and rougher sex demonstrates that. Now you just have to use the same interpersonal skills that made your past kinky fuckfests possible — along with the same respect for limits, boundaries, and each other — to negotiate and realize your girlfriend’s edgy-but-thoroughlycommon fantasy. I recommend reading “Rape Fantasy: How to Carry It Out Safely,” a long and thoughtful post at Slut Lessons (slutlessons.wordpress.com), an engaging sex blog that’s sadly no longer being updated. The first recommendation from Educated Slut, the site’s anonymous author: Maybe we shouldn’t call them “rape fantasies” at all. “Very few people have the desire to be put through the physical and emotional trauma of a real rape,” writes Educated Slut. “This is the primary reason I refer to this as ‘forced sex fantasy’ rather than rape fantasy.” You might to be one of those people, SEAN. You seem to be under the impression that there’s something inherently more dangerous about realizing/role-playing your way through a forced-sex scenario. But slapping the label “rape fantasy” on rough(er) sex shouldn’t result in you having some sort of out-of-body experience that leads you to go apeshit on your helpless fiancée.

why someone’s erotic imagination snaps on an inanimate object (high heels, leather gear, rubber masks) or a particular sexual scenario (cuckolding, role-play, outdoor sex) — but we can safely say that people don’t stumble into their fetishes or kinks. Misinformed, sex-negative, kink-negative pornophobes routinely talk about fetishes and kinks like a moment’s exposure can transform an innocent person with purely vanilla tastes into a horned-up, slobbering, gimp-outfit-wearing kink monster. And that’s not the way it happens. So what did happen to you, BARF? You found some cuckold porn online, and your dick said: “DUDE. THIS IS IT. THIS IS WHAT WE’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR. RUN WITH THIS.” Your particular kink was already in there somewhere, already rattling around in your erotic subconscious, but you couldn’t articulate it — it didn’t take shape — until you finally “stumbled over” the images and narratives you were looking for all along. And your kink, like the kinks of so many other people (see SEAN’s fiancée, above), seems to be grounded in insecurity and fear — you’re the jealous type, you fear being cheated on, and your erotic imagination/reptile brain took your fears and spun them into a kink. Congrats. On to your question: Yes, you can have a fetish you hate, i.e., you can have a kink you don’t want to act on because the fantasy can’t be realized for moral or ethical reasons (it involves children, nonconsensual acts, Donald Trump) or because you’re fairly certain doing so would suck for emotional or physical reasons (potentially traumatizing, physically dangerous, Donald Trump). Time will determine if your feelings of disgust are merely your run-of-the-mill, beneficialto-overcome kink negativity or if they’re a sign cuckolding should remain a go-to masturbatory fantasy for you, BARF, without ever becoming a cheating-woman reality.

“YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO SILENTLY ENDURE PAINFUL SEX.”

I’m a single straight guy and this is probably going to sound really stupid, but… I basically stumbled over the cuckold fetish and I can’t get it out of my mind. I’ve tried to stay away from it because I’m pretty sure you aren’t supposed to feel like garbage after enjoying porn. But I can’t get it out of my head. It’s worrying, since I fear that one day it might end up spoiling things when I fall in love with someone since I’m a bit of a jealous person. The idea of a cheating woman is really hot in spite of all of that. But there’s this lingering feeling of disgust surrounding the whole thing. Is it possible to have a fetish you hate? BAFFLED ABOUT ROMANTIC FUTURE

Don’t you just hate it when someone leaves a fetish sitting on the steps and then you come along and stumble over it and — bam! — you fall and hit your head and when you come to you’ve got a brand-new fetish? Yeah, no. We don’t know exactly where people’s fetishes and kinks come from — how or

I’ve been dating a girl for a while, and I take our relationship seriously. Sometimes sex is a little difficult because of her pubic hair. She shaves it close to the labia, which is right where my cock is going in and out, and it’s very prickly. I don’t mean lightly prickly — it’s like a bunch of wooden chopsticks have been filed down and shaped into a cylinder, and I’ve been asked to let them clench my dick. I brought it up once and tried to gently suggest a waxing or letting the hair grow back. She didn’t want to talk about it. I get it: Nobody likes having their genital area critiqued. I understand that I don’t really have the right to dictate her grooming habits, but how can I suggest that maybe there are other solutions? SEEKS COUNSEL REGARDING AGONIZING PENILE EXFOLIATION

The only solution is your girlfriend letting her pubic hair grow back permanently, SCRAPE, since waxed labia will eventually become stubble-covered labia. Start by letting your girlfriend know you’re aware that women have had to endure millennia of misogynistic/religious garbage about their genitals — but you shouldn’t have to silently endure painful sex. On the Lovecast, Peter Staley on the benefits and dangers of PrEP: savagelovecast.com.

SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET AND FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST (DAN’S WEEKLY PODCAST) AT SAVAGELOVECAST.COM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015


FOR THE WEEK OF

Free Will Astrology

12.16-12.23

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In the coming weeks, the pursuit of pleasure could drain your creative powers, diminish your collaborative possibilities, and wear you out. But it’s also possible that the pursuit of pleasure will enhance your creative powers, synergize your alliances, and lead you to new opportunities. Which way will you go? It all depends on the kinds of pleasures you pursue. The dumb, numbing, mediocre type will shrink your soul. The smart, intriguing, invigorating variety will expand your mind. Got all that? Say “hell, no” to trivializing decadence so you can say “wow, yes” to uplifting bliss.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Garnets are considered less valuable than diamonds. But out in the wild, there’s an intimate connection between these two gemstones. Wherever you find garnets near the surface of the earth, you can be reasonably sure that diamonds are buried deeper down in the same location. Let’s use this relationship as a metaphor for your life, Sagittarius. I suspect you have recently chanced upon a metaphorical version of garnets, or will do so soon. Maybe you should make plans to search for the bigger treasure toward which they point the way.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Ready for the Cool Anger Contest? You can earn maximum points by expressing your dissatisfaction in ways that generate the most constructive transformations. Bonus points will be awarded for your ability to tactfully articulate complicated feelings, as well as for your emotionally intelligent analyses that inspire people to respond empathetically rather than defensively. What are the prizes? First prize is a breakthrough in your relationship with an ally who could be crucial to your expansion in 2016. Second prize is a liberation from one of your limiting beliefs.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): A fourth-century monk named Martin was a pioneer wine-maker in France. He founded the Marmoutier Abbey and planted vineyards on the surrounding land. According to legend, Martin’s donkey had a crucial role in lifting viticulture out of its primitive state. Midway through one growing season, the beast escaped its tether and nibbled on a lot of the grapevines. All the monks freaked out, fearing that the crop was wrecked. But ultimately the grapes grew better than they had in previous years, and the wine they produced was fabulous. Thus was born the practice of pruning, which became de rigueur for all grape-growers. What’s your equivalent of Martin’s donkey, Aquarius? I bet it’ll exert its influence very soon.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “The deepest urge in human nature is the desire to be important,” said educator John Dewey. If that’s true, Pisces, you are on the verge of having your deepest urge fulfilled more than it has in a long time. The astrological alignments suggest that you are reaching the peak of your value to other people. You’re unusually likely to be seen and appreciated and acknowledged for who you really are. If you have been underestimating your worth, I doubt you will be able to continue doing so. Here’s your homework: Take a realistic inventory of the ways your life has had a positive impact on the lives of people you have known.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): The Neanderthals were a different human species

that co-existed with our ancestors, homo sapiens, for at least 5,000 years. But they eventually died out while our people thrived. Why? One reason, says science writer Marcus Chown, is that we alone invented sewing needles. Our newborn babies had well-made clothes to keep them warm and healthy through frigid winters. Neanderthal infants, covered with ill-fitting animal skins, had a lower survival rate. Chown suggests that although this provided us with a mere one percent survival advantage, that turned out to be significant. I think you’re ready to find and use a small yet ultimately crucial edge like that over your competitors, Aries.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Artist Robert Barry created “30 Pieces,” an installation that consisted of pieces of paper on which he had typed the following statement: “Something which is very near in place and time, but not yet known to me.” According to my reading of the astrological omens, this theme captures the spirit of the phase you’re now entering. But I think it will evolve in the coming weeks. First it’ll be “Something which is very near in place and time, and is becoming known to me.” By midJanuary it could turn into “Something which is very near and dear, and has become known to me.”

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “There is in every one of us, even those who seem to be most moderate, a type of desire that is uncanny, wild, and lawless.” Greek philosopher Plato wrote that in his book The Republic, and I’m bringing it to your attention just in time for your Season of Awakening and Deepening Desire. The coming days will be a time when you can, if you choose, more fully tune in to the uncanny, wild and lawless aspects of your primal yearnings. But wait a minute! I’m not suggesting you should immediately take action to gratify them. For now, just feel them and observe them. Find out what they have to teach you. Wait until the new year before you consider the possibility of expressing them.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): You may not have to use a literal crowbar in the coming weeks, but this rough tool will serve you well as a metaphor. Wherever you go, imagine that you’ve got one with you. Why? It’s time to jimmy open glued-shut portals . . . to pry loose mental blocks . . . to coax unyielding influences to budge . . . to nudge intransigent people free of their fixations. Anything that is stuck or jammed needs to get unstuck or unjammed

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LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): The coming weeks will be a favorable time for you to consort with hidden depths and unknown riches. In every way you can imagine, I urge you to go deeper down and further in. Cultivate a more conscious connection with the core resources you sometimes take for granted. This is one time when delving into the darkness can lead you to pleasure and treasure. As you explore, keep in mind this advice from author T. Harv Eker: “In every forest, on every farm, in every orchard on earth, what’s under the ground creates what’s above the ground. That’s why placing your attention on the fruits you have already grown is futile. You can’t change the fruits that are already hanging on the tree. But you can change tomorrow’s fruits. To do so, you will have to dig below the ground and strengthen the roots.” Make a guess about what you will be most proud of 15 years from today. Testify at FreeWill Astrology.com.

get your yoga on! give the gift of good health JLIW FHUWLÀFDWHV FDQ EH SXUFKDVHG RQOLQH DW

VFKRROKRXVH\RJD FRP

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Congratulations! You have broken all your previous records for doing boring tasks that are good for you. In behalf of the other eleven signs, I thank you for your heroic, if unexciting, campaign of self-improvement. You have not only purified your emotional resources and cleared out some breathing room for yourself, but you have also made it easier for people to help you and feel close to you. Your duty has not yet been completed, however. There are a few more details to take care of before the gods of healthy tedium will be finished with you. But start looking for signs of your big chance to make a break for freedom. They’ll arrive soon.

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700

N E W S

through the power of your willful intervention.

The English word “fluke” means “lucky stroke.” It was originally used in the game of billiards when a player made a good shot that he or she wasn’t even trying to accomplish. Later its definition expanded to include any fortuitous event that happens by chance rather than because of skill: good fortune generated accidentally. I suspect that you are about to be the beneficiary of what may seem to be a series of flukes, Leo. In at least one case, though, your lucky break will have been earned by the steady work you’ve done without any fanfare.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER

CLASSIFIEDS FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PLACE A CLASSIFIEDS ADVERTISEMENT, CALL 412-316-3342 EXT. 189 HELP WANTED

ADOPTION Couple promises a secure loving family for your baby. Exp. Paid Rachel & Jim 877-244-2053

HELP WANTED

REHEARSAL

STORAGE

WANTED! 36 PEOPLE

Rehearsal Space

ABC SELF STORAGE

starting @ $150/mo. Many sizes available, no sec deposit, play @ the original and largest practice facility, 24/7 access.

OFFICIAL ADVERTISEMENT THE BOARD OF PUBLIC EDUCATION OF THE SCHOOL DISTRICT OF PITTSBURGH

Sealed proposals shall be deposited at the Administration Building, Room 251, 341 South Bellefield Avenue, Pittsburgh, Pa., 15213, on January 5 and 19 (refer to project manuals for specific date), until 2:00 p.m., local prevailing time for:

5x10 $45/mo.+tax. 10x10 $65/mo.+ tax 10x20 $110/mo.+tax. (2) locations Mckees Rocks & South Side.

Pgh. Allegheny 6-8 New Pool Cover Mechanical and Electrical Primes

412-403-6069

412-403-6069

EAST FOR RENT

ROOMMATES

HEALTH SERVICES

2 BR. SHADYSIDE APT. NEAR WALNUT ST. SHOPS $1,350 MO. FEB. 1, 2016 INCLUDING HEAT & 1 PARKING SPACE BEYNON & COMPANY 412-261-3640

ALL AREAS ROOMMATES.COM. Lonely? Bored? Broke? Find the perfect roommate to complement your personality and lifestyle at Roommates. com! (AAN CAN)

ELIMINATE CELLULITE and Inches in weeks! All natural. Odor free. Works for men and women. Free month supply on select packages. Order now! 844-244-7149 (M-F 9am-8pm central) (AANCAN)

Pgh. Brashear Heating Valves Replacement Phase 2 Mechanical Prime

HELP WANTED

FINANCIAL

CLASSES

Neat appearance necessary.

PAID IN ADVANCE

Knowledge of Downtown and

Make $1000 a Week Mailing Brochures From Home. Helping home workers since 2001. Genuine Opportunity. No experience required. Start immediately www.themailinghub.com (AANCAN)

Are you in BIG trouble with the IRS? Stop wage & bank levies, liens & audits, unfiled tax returns, payroll issues, & resolve tax debt FAST Call 844-753-1317

AIRLINE CAREERS begin here – Get trained as FAA certified Aviation Technician. Financial aid for qualified students. Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance 800-7251563 (AAN CAN)

to Lose Weight. 30-day money back guarantee. Herbal Program. Also opportunity to earn up to $1,000 monthly. 1-800-492-4437 www.myherbalife.com

IS NOW HIRING...

DRIVERS Make $10-$13/hr for food delivery. Experience preferred.

city's East End is essential. Must be available evenings and weekends until 10pm.

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Pgh. Carmalt Boiler Replacement Asbestos, General and Mechanical Primes Central Food Kitchen Rooftop HVAC Unit Replacement Mechanical and Electrical Primes Pgh. Langley Replace Electrical Distribution System General and Electrical Primes Pgh. Manchester Water Cooler Replacement General, Plumbing and Electrical Primes Pgh. Obama Asphalt Safety Improvements General Prime Pgh. Perry Science Labs Asbestos, General, Plumbing, Mechanical and Electrical Primes Pgh. Weil Generator Exhaust System Mechanical Prime Various Exterior Envelope Repairs General Prime Project Manual and Drawings will be available for purchase on December 7, 2015 at Modern Reproductions (412-488-7700) 127 McKean Street, Pittsburgh, Pa., 15219 between 9:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m. Only Pittsburgh Obama Asphalt Improvement and the Pittsburgh Perry Science Labs will be available on December 14, 2015. The cost of the Project Manual Documents is nonrefundable. Project details and dates are described in each project manual We are an equal rights and opportunity school district. Parent Hotline: 412-622-7920 www.pps.k12.pa.us

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015


LET YOUR VOICES RING WITH ONCE A MONTH BIRTH CONTROL

CITIZEN POLICE REVIEW BOARD 2016 MEETING DATES AND HOST NEIGHBORHOODS

The Center For Family Planning Research is conducting a clinical research study for an investigational contraceptive ring and looking for healthy female participants.

The following calendar maintains the tradition of meeting at 6:00 p.m. on the fourth Tuesday of every calendar month except as noted. The several meetings proposed for Council Chambers attempt to respond to the public recommendation that meeting at a centralized location may encourage increased public attendance.

Participation includes 8 visits over 13 months at Magee-Womens Hospital, several phone calls, & study contraception at no cost to participants. Eligible participants may be compensated up to $500 for their participation. You may be eligible for this research study if you are a woman 18-35 years of age, in good general health, have a history of regular periods, in need of birth control for pregnancy prevention. To learn more & to ďŹ nd out if you’re eligible please call the Center for Family Planning Research at 412-641-5496 or visit www.birthcontrolstudies.org

All Meetings Scheduled to Begin at 6:00 p.m. DATE

NEIGHBORHOOD

ADDRESS

January 26, 2016

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg 414 Grant Street Pittsburgh, PA 15219 412-255-2142 - office

February 23, 2016

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

Brashear Association

2005 Sarah Street Pittsburgh, PA 15203 412-321-4333

March 22, 2016

April 26, 2016

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

May 24, 2016

Hazelwood Senior Center

5344 Second Avenue Pittsburgh, PA 15207 412-422-6549

Z3

Z4

June 28, 2016

PERSAD Center

5301 Butler Street, #100 Pittsburgh, PA 15201 412-441-9786 Z2

July 26, 2016

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

August 2016

Combined with September Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

Carnegie Library of Pittsburgh Homewood Branch

7101 Hamilton Avenue Pittsburgh, PA 15208 412-731-3080

September 27, 2016

October 25, 2016

Combined with September

Z5 November 2016

Combined with December

December 6, 2016

Council Chambers

Combined with December 510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

(The public will be notified of any change of date or location through media publication.) For Further Information: 412-765-8023 Confidential TipLine: 412-255-CPRB N E W S

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Target is an equal employment opportunity employer and is a drug-free workplace. Š2015 Target Stores. The Bullseye Design and Target are registered trademarks of Target Brands, Inc. All rights reserved.

30 Openings!

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To Apply: • Visit Target.com/careers, select hourly stores positions and search for the city of Pittsburgh, Ross Township, and McCandless, PA. • Apply in person at the Employment Kiosks located near the front of any Target Store.

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BeneďŹ ts: • Target merchandise discount • Competitive pay • Flexible scheduling

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You can expect a lot from working at Target. An inclusive, energetic team. A company focused on community. ( IYHUK [OH[ W\[Z N\LZ[Z ÄYZ[ (UK [OL M\U HUK ÅL_PIPSP[` VM H QVI [OH[ ^VYRZ for you. TEAM MEMBERS AND TEAM LEADERS • Deliver excellent service to Target guests • Help keep the Target brand experience consistent, positive and welcoming • Make a difference by responding quickly and responsively to guest and team member needs

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52

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.16/12.23.2015

Starting Pay $10/hr + TIPS*

Employee meal allowance of $10 per shift!

*We will pay more for experience!

On-Site Interviews! JOB FAIRS

CALL COREY TODAY FOR MORE INFORMATION - 717-877-4024!

Monday, December 14th through Saturday, December 19th Monday, December 21st through Wednesday, December 23rd Saturday, December 26th 9 AM - 11:30 AM and then 1 PM - 4:30 PM. Held offsite at Residence Inn Pittsburgh Airport Location 1500 Park Lane Drive • Pittsburgh, PA 15275

Sign-On Bonus • (November 1 - December 20, 2015) $100 at orientation; $100 at 45 days of employment; $200 at 90 days of employment; $200 at 6 months of employment

Referral Bonus

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$100 at orientation; $200 at 90 days of employment; $200 at 6 months of employment Qualified candidates are encouraged to apply online before the Job Fair: hmshost.com/careers Search by location - PA - Pittsburgh EOE - Minorities/Females/Protected Veterans/Disabled - DFWP Background checks will be required prior to beginning employment.

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MASSAGE

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{BY BRENDAN EMMETT QUIGLEY / WWW.BRENDANEMMETTQUIGLEY.COM}

9:30am-11pm

AUTO SERVICES

MASSAGE

CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid. We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888420-3808 www.cash4car. com (AAN CAN)

Downtown $40/hour Open 24 hours

412-401-4110 322 Fourth Ave.

HEALTH SERVICES

ADOPTION

724-742-3333

Struggling with DRUGS or ALCOHOL? Addicted to PILLS?

20550 Rt. 19 Unit 7 Cranberry Twsp, Pa 16066

TALK TO SOMEONE WHO CARES. Call The Addiction Hope & Help Line for a free assessment. 800-978-6674 (AAN CAN)

PREGNANT? THINKING OF ADOPTION? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families Nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-4136293. Void in Illinois/New Mexico/Indiana (AAN CAN)

Table Shower

Grand Opening 2 Locations!

Bodywork by Cindy Chinese Massage, Sauna & Table Shower available. McKnight - $40 per hour. Table shower only $10. Table shower & unlimited sauna only $15. Imperial - $50 per hour, includes FREE table shower Open 7 Days a Week • 9:30am-10:30pm 7777 McKnight Road, Pgh, PA 15237 • 412-366-7130 180 Imperial Plaza Drive, Imperial, PA 15126 • 724-695-8088 CC Accepted.

ACROSS 1. Key’s partner in comedy 6. Long way to go in NYC 9. Mr. T cult comedy 14. Guitar god, in slang 15. Mustard’s rank: Abbr. 16. Letter after 60-Across 17. Dress with a high-waist cut 19. Light lunch 20. Likely Cy Young candidate 21. “Like THAT’s going to happen!” 23. “Time Out Of Mind” star 24. Electrical devices that regulate voltage 28. Rapper Fetty ___ 29. Small cut 30. V.I.P. 36. Leatherman tool 39. IVF supplies 40. Dusting necessity 42. First word of “California Dreamin’” 43. Kvetching phrase 46. FTC target 49. Doctor’s visit, maybe 51. Super PAC ammo 52. Sonic rival 58. “Matilda” author 59. Ease up

60. Letter before 16-Across 62. “See you later” 64. Nixon’s pet 67. Place to call home 68. How-___ (some wiki pages) 69. Pad Thai or chocolate chip cookies, e.g. 70. Glove material 71. War hero 72. Ran through the wringer

DOWN 1. Bygone sunscreen ingredient 2. Right on target 3. Burning remnant 4. Oft-misused verb 5. When the murderer is revealed, often 6. Roman-___ 7. XC70 maker 8. “I’m a wed-hot sportsman after wild game” speaker 9. Rehab afflictions 10. Embarrassed feeling after failing 11. Heavenly 12. Company that Pete Rose and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar did commercials for 13. Wished, as a farewell 18. Like some contract work

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22. Hotel units: Abbr. 25. “Too cute” 26. “Not for me” 27. Bugling grazer 30. Halloween word 31. Brown, e.g. 32. Cared deeply 33. Sapsucker’s home 34. Where to go in Manchester 35. Boarding area: Abbr. 37. Reach new heights? 38. Santa’s Village employee 41. Shop alternative 44. Leave out 45. Talk, talk, talk

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MAIN ATTRACTION {BY REBECCA NUTTALL}

IT’S THE MORNING after the third night of Hanukkah, 16 days

before Christmas, 17 days before Kwanzaa, and Prantl’s Bakery in Market Square is all dressed up for the holiday rush. “This is the calm before the storm,” says Tom Medvitz, Prantl’s CEO. A woman comes in to pick up her order. Her face lights up like the tree in the PPG ice rink when the Prantl’s employee lifts the lid. She coos like Fourth of July fireworks are going off inside the cake box. Another satisfied customer. Prantl’s is a Pittsburgh institution. A bakery of one sort or another has sat in its Shadyside flagship location for 108 years; Prantl’s has been there for more than 40. At the Market Square space, it rubs shoulders with another Pittsburgh staple: Mancini’s. “Pittsburghers are very proud of their history,” says Medvitz. “It’s nice to have these businesses that tie you to the past.” But even greater than the legend of Prantl’s is the lore of its burnt almond torte. Buried under mountains of sliced, sugared almonds, the torte is comprised of cake, custard and frosting. Legend has it that the idea for the almond torte was born in 1969, when one of the bakery’s owners, Henry Prantl, attended a baking conference in Anaheim, Calif. While there he was encouraged by the Almond Board of California (yes, that’s a real thing) to find inventive ways to incorporate almonds into his baking because of an almond surplus at that time. The new dessert caught on.

{PHOTO BY MIKE SCHWARZ}

Making mini burnt almond tortes at Prantl’s

“Greatest Cake America Has Ever Made” and Jane Fonda tweeted about it during a visit to the city last year. “It’s a big item. It’s our most popular item,” says Medvitz. “We ship them. There are some people who have moved away from Pittsburgh and they still want it. It’s become a tradition.” That’s because for many, the cake is more than a dessert. It’s as much a part of the holidays as watching your favorite Christmas movie or lighting a menorah. One year, a man from the South Hills called Prantl’s to say that eating the almond torte was a tradition he shared with his father. “He said that cake brought his father back to him for the holidays,” says Turner. Those kinds of stories weave together to form the fabric of what makes Prantl’s a regular holiday stop for so many. And that holiday spirit is something Prantl’s employees embrace. Every year, from December to January, the employees pool their tips to donate to three local charities. In the past they’ve

“THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO HAVE MOVED AWAY FROM PITTSBURGH AND THEY STILL WANT IT.” “Our burnt almond torte is different,” says Diane Turner, the Market Square manager. “I don’t know what it is; but whatever it is, it just makes it pop.” And during the holidays, while other bakeries are doubling down on thumbprints, snickerdoodles, buckeyes, pizzelles, gingerbread, oatmeal raisin, chocolate chip and other cookies, Prantl’s is making tortes by the truckload. But Prantl’s has cookies too. Its display cases are filled with sugar-cookie elves with red and green bow ties, blue and white dreidels and stars of David. There’s even a Santa Claus with chocolate-jimmie boots, and reindeers with pretzels for antlers. If you’re looking for something simple, there are also stacks of sugar cookies with red and green sprinkles. Still, the almond torte is clearly the star here and isn’t just a favorite among Pittsburghers. The Huffington Post named it the

given as much at $1,500 to causes like homelessness and children’s charities. Helping others is something the employees learned from their employers. One of Turner’s favorite stories is the year a woman couldn’t make it out to the bakery to pick up her order, and the owners drove more than 100 miles to deliver it to her. “She was very thankful,” says Turner. In today’s digital age, patrons don’t have to wait for a trip home to enjoy Prantl’s trademark cake, and can even have baked goods delivered to their door. “Anybody, anywhere in the United States can order online,” says Medvitz. And online ordering has proved especially useful, even to locals. “During the holidays, everyone is so busy,” says Turner. “They don’t have time to come in or call. In the morning, I’ll check and we’ll have online orders from 2 a.m., 11:30 p.m.” But don’t wait too long. All Christmas orders for in-store pickup must be in by 6 p.m. on Mon., Dec. 22. R NU T TA L L @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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