We & Thee Spring/Summer 2018 by Carolina Friends School

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Spring/Summer 2018

Examining Equity

We & Thee

Spring/Summer 2018 3 A Note From the Head of School 4 Fair is Not Equal 6 Windows and Mirrors 8 Let it GLOW! 10 Pushing Ideas of Identity into Community 12 Alumni Spotlight 14 Educational Access: Our New Tuition Program 15 Affinity Group Supports Parents of Students of Color 16 A New Director for Advancing Equity 17 Building the Beloved Community 18 New Opportunities Coming with Tri-TAC 20 In Appreciation of Our Retiring Staff

Belief in accepting and respecting each individual’s uniqueness Which implies: commitment to employ and enroll individuals of diverse backgrounds; commitment to provide community members with opportunities to learn to know one another; shared resolve to be open to the differences in others; commitment to provide a curriculum that enables each to celebrate one’s unique talents and heritage and those of others; acceptance of the responsibility for one’s own learning; commitment to lessen divisions among ages, among school units, and between the School and the broader community; acceptance of that of God in each person; belief that the individual achieves identity in relation to community and that an individual’s identity is nurtured and enhanced by community; shared resolve to promote tolerance and address the issues of prejudice. — TENET OF THE SCHOOL PHILOSOPHY

We & Thee is published by

Carolina Friends School 4809 Friends School Road Durham, NC 27705 919.383.6602 | www.cfsnc.org

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Karen Cumberbatch, Head of School Katherine Scott, Communications Coordinator Cover art: Liam Coerr and Mallory Dunn (A detail from their Nature Court mural on campus) Photographers include Anthony L. Clay, Emily Godrich, Chris Grochowski, Katherine Scott, and Laura Shmania

A Note From the Head of School From its founding, CFS has consistently leaned into often uncomfortable, sometimes confrontational, and always critically important conversations about diversity, equity, and inclusivity. Over the years as our understanding of the many ways in which we as human beings construct our identity and live our lives has deepened, so too have the conversations and explorations of these concepts at CFS. From racial integration in the 1960s and the beginnings of the movement for women’s rights in the 1970s, the School has continuously sought to push our students, staff, parents and the wider community to better understand, embrace, and affirm each other’s humanity, value, and dignity. Understanding that how and what we teach our children has a direct impact on whether we advance in becoming a more just and equitable society, the School has consistently looked to explore these issues with students despite the complexity, messiness, and inevitable unevenness of work that by definition seems to happen in fits and starts. Our efforts toward racial, ethnic, gender, gender identity, sexual orientation, religious, socio-economic, physical ability, neuro-diversity (and the list goes on) equity and fairness remain essential to our program. And, as this issue of We and Thee shows, while we have made great strides, there is still much work to be done. It is still necessary that our Early Schoolers remind adults in the community of their rights as our youngest citizens. Our students of color still need a safe space to share and explore that aspect of their identity freely, and we still need to continue to expand and refine our curriculum to be even more inclusive. As economic disparities continue to grow in the United States, at CFS we still need to find ways to bridge that divide 3

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and create opportunities for students to interact with others from the broadest range of socioeconomic circumstances possible. Society has not yet achieved equality in the fight for women’s rights and our understanding of the continuum of the W (“whatever”) in GLOW is ever expanding. The work goes on. It can be daunting to know that there will always be equity challenges to address. At CFS, in teaching our children that it is possible to change the world we also teach them it is not easy to accomplish this lofty goal. We look forward to having a Director of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusivity to aid us, but we know that it takes a lot of perseverance, conflict resolution, collaboration, compassion, empathy, discernment, and plain old hard work from everyone in collaboration to make a difference. We show by example that we all have to roll up our sleeves, expose our vulnerabilities, and be willing to put in the emotional and physical energy to discover the places where we have individual and collective misperceptions and blind spots. Only when we are willing and well equipped to bring these dark places to light and make shifts in our thinking and actions can we make substantive change. In embracing this whole-heartedly at CFS, we remain undaunted and instead continue to seek ways to lean into these challenges. We may have some uncomfortable and messy moments, but our eye is ever fixed on that arc bending toward justice, affirmation, and inclusion for all.

Examining Equity in the Early Schools

Fair is Not Equal Brad Kershner Being a mature and responsible adult, and trying to do good in the world, means being awake to the ways in which society is not fair or equitable, and working to make things better. Being an educator means helping children become people who will share in that work. In order to support children on their path to maturity, we have to help them understand themselves and their world in ways that illuminate possibilities for being helpful and making a difference. They have to come to know, in one way or another, that there are problems in the world, and that they are people who can help to fix them. As adults working with young people, there are many important ideas and concepts that we strive to convey to our students. Collaboration, empathy, diversity, interdependence, and sustainability are

some of the foundational cornerstones upon which we can build a meaningful curriculum. Additionally, if we want our children to live lives of purpose and positivity, we have to teach them about equity, both as a way to understand social problems and as an ideal to strive for. With young children, it is often best to start close in. Young people are no strangers to conflict. None of us are. So we begin with helping children to solve conflicts peacefully and respectfully, all the time. We start small by conveying through our actions, expectations, and words that everything matters and everything counts. Hurt feelings are important. So is sharing, caring, listening, and being heard. Little problems can feel like big problems, and when we take hurt feelings seriously, empathize with each other, and establish consistent

In March, our Durham Early Schoolers all journeyed to City Hall to engage with town leaders about their own “Declaration of Children’s Rights.” This long list of heartfelt and inspiring thoughts was modeled after the U.N. Declaration of the Rights of Children. The exercise was led by the staff’s conviction that our children are global citizens with basic human rights, and that this was one way in which they could lend their voices to the national conversation on school and child safety.

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modeling and scaffolding for listening and perspective-taking, we teach that problems, conflicts, and hard feelings are a normal, inevitable part of life, and that we all have the capacity to work through and resolve them together in ways that maintain trust and love in our community. It is this connection to a group that cares about us, and that we grow to care for, that forms the

We have to experience what it feels like to suffer unfairness, and we have to experience for ourselves that injustice can be improved through the actions of people who care—people like you and me. Fair is not equal. Equity does not mean equal outcomes for all, or standardization, or sameness. Equity is simply a framework for understanding fairness, and for thinking about why some things

“...we have to experience for ourselves that injustice can be improved through the actions of people who care—people like you and me.” foundation for ever-widening circles of compassion and concern. When we feel an injustice has been done to us—perhaps we did not get a turn on the swings today, or someone called us a name—we can respond to that injustice in the context of a caring community that understands that frustration and takes steps to ensure the problem does not continue (and we get a turn, eventually, even if it feels like we have to wait a looong time to get it).

Right: One student was excited to meet a police officer in the City Hall lobby. Far right: Presenting the Children’s Bill of Rights, complete with lists and drawings, to City Council member Javiera Caballero Consejal in the mayor’s office.

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are not fair, and why we should try to make them better. Therefore, equity is at the heart of the educational process—which is, ultimately, the process of guiding and supporting others to fulfill their potential and purpose as unique, loving, intelligent forces of positivity and goodness in the world. Brad Kershner is Head Teacher at Chapel Hill Early School.

Examining Equity in the Lower School

Windows and Mirrors Natalie Harvey Step inside the Lower School library, where you will find a book for every reader, and a reader for every book. Students spread out across the space, nestled in forts or lounging on bean bags, devouring their latest reads. While to them, the books must magically appear on the shelves, as if fairies fly in at night with new titles to share, every new book added to this collection is carefully chosen according to selection guidelines both standard for libraries and unique to our school and its mission. So, too, are books that are de-selected and removed from the library. The books that we surround ourselves with are representative of the world in which we live, or the world we would like to create. They shape who we are and how we think. With this in mind, curating a collection that will nurture the hearts and minds of our young students is a quest to seek out diverse and inclusive books to provide children with mirrors, sliding doors, and windows. How do we do this? We seek out #ownvoices and #weneeddiversebooks resources, we study the Guide for Selecting Anti-Bias Children’s Books, we review the resources in School Library Journal’s “A Diversity & Cultural Literacy Toolkit,” we seek out children’s publishers with a commitment to diversity like Lee & Low Books and Barefoot Books, and most importantly, we get to know our students and provide them with their own windows and mirrors.

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“Books are sometimes windows, offering views of worlds that may be real or imagined, familiar or strange. These windows are also sliding glass doors, and readers have only to walk through in imagination to become part of whatever world has been created and recreated by the author. When lighting conditions are just right, however, a window can also be a mirror. Literature transforms human experience and reflects it back to us, and in that reflection we can see our own lives and experiences as part of the larger human experience.” — Rudine Sims Bishop

This winter, Mountain Class embarked on a literature-based unit called “Changemakers.” The students read children’s books telling the stories of famous changemakers in American history, among them Jane Addams, Cesar Chavez, Clara Lemlich, Susan B. Anthony, and John Rankin. The students then created a collection of diary entries written in first person narrative, each highlighting the work of a different changemaker. The goal was to provide a creative way for students to write about the aspects of each figure that most resonated with them. The list of changemakers to study was generated by teachers to address a wide range of social justice issues as well as gender and cultural perspectives. As part of the unit, the class visited the International Civil Rights Center and Museum in Greensboro, NC. Students engaged with a powerful and informative program that covered heavy topics such as segregation and racism. They then continued to process what they’d learned back at school as they finished work on the unit.

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Examining Equity in the Middle School

Let It GLOW! Lisa Joyner “But that’s not fair!” is a phrase that many of us uttered as young adults. Often we were rebuffed with a smile and a head shake: “LIFE’S not fair,” some well-meaning adult would say. And so we learn to trust adults, even if we see and intuit that the system they built is unfair. After 22 years of middle school teaching, I’ve started to see that it is in these formative interactions around fairness that budding instincts for equality are either honored or discouraged. Fairness is one of the fundamental rules of law in an adolescent’s cosmology, and from this begins notions of equity, selfishness, difference, and allyship. Our responses to them matter, deeply. In the spring of 2012, the CFS Middle School community was abuzz with confusion and fear about Amendment One, a referendum to our state constitution which would ban gay marriages and civil unions. Our students responded to this with their instincts toward fairness: Anyone should be able to love who they want to love, right? Right? A group of students got together and asked me to help them start a Gay/Straight Alliance in our Middle School, one of the first of its kind in the state. I agreed. They crafted a mission statement, We are GLOW, which stands for Gay, Lesbian, Or Whatever. Our mission is to promote acceptance, love, and tolerance at our school. We want to create the safest possible environment for gay and lesbian students, teachers, and visitors. We ask that straight allies join us and show their support for any student struggling with who they are. And let us be clear: As a club, we are not just for gay, lesbian, or questioning students: We are for everyone. We are for love and acceptance. We are GLOW. We welcome you to join us — whoever you are.

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held a flash mob, hosted a bake sale, designed a banner, and gathered at some well-attended lunch meetings. They wanted to shout their message from the rooftop, so we visited UNC-Chapel Hill with “Vote Against Amendment One” signs to talk to voters about their concerns before the upcoming May 8 voting day. Adolescents have a keen, almost-visceral awareness of right and wrong. They want the world to be kinder, fairer, and more sensible. They live in what feels like an authoritarian world that more often tells them what they can’t do than what they can. On our best days, we hear them and help them understand why injustice and inequality exists. On their best days, they return the favor by inspiring us to justify our standards. As a Quaker school, we encourage students to see that all people possess a divine spark. On this premise, our students remind us that we are all entitled to be treated with unwavering dignity, respect, and love. Over the last six years, GLOW has been a club that has come together to honor this instinct and clear logic — from value to action, from theory to practice. At the middle school level, this is and has always been about fairness, love, holding up your friends, and being who you are. This year, I have the privilege of cosponsoring GLOW with Carly Campbell, who brings her background in youth organizing to the club. Our cohort consists of 8-10 students, who wear their GLOW T-shirts proudly and hope that folks will ask them what it stands for. “Gay, Lesbian, or, you know...WHATEVER!” For me, some of my wisest teachers on the issue of equity have been middle schoolers. With their fresh eyes, they see that our societal values and our actions can be wildly incongruent. So here’s to them, voters of the future. I’m excited about getting out of their way and letting them lead with their hearts.

GLOW Through the Years

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Examining Equity in the Upper School

Pushing Ideas of Identity into Community Katherine Scott One of the leading frameworks for anti-bias education comes from Teaching Tolerance, a project of the Southern Poverty Law Center. This framework is built around a set of four “Social Justice Anchor Standards and Domains:” identity; diversity; justice; and action. Educational goals include helping students develop a positive and affirming sense of personal identity; empathy, respect, and understanding for those who identify differently; awareness of injustice on personal and systemic levels; and empowerment to stand up to exclusion and prejudice. A great developmental task of adolescence is identity formation. In the Upper School, staff seek to support and companion students as they explore and wrestle with their identity. At the same time, part of this work means challenging students to grow, examine the boundaries of their own privilege and understanding, and push ideas of identity into relationship with others.

voice in ways that feel good to them. It also involves a lot of mindful relationship building with advisors, teachers, and other students. We know this work is never truly complete and that this journey is one students and staff take on together. One of the ways in which students can experiment with sharing their voice is through multiple student-led clubs. The Social Justice Club supports activism and advocacy, while the Interfaith Alliance and Diversity & Multicultural Club (DMC) provide spaces for identity exploration and community building. The Diversity and Multicultural Club (DMC) is an affinity group for students who self-identify

This process includes connecting students to helpful resources. Examples of this include examining diversity within the curriculum to challenge rather than reinforce power imbalances, providing creative means of expression in a variety of ways, and helping students learn how to share their 10

as being from a diverse racial or ethnic background. The group was formed to provide support and a safe space for students to discuss issues of identity, attitudes about race, current topics in the media, and personal experiences related to being racially or ethnically diverse. Students share stories, watch videos, discuss queries, and plan outreach activities to spark dialogue within the larger community. Meetings are at times either “safe space” meetings (closed for racially/ethnically diverse students) or “brave space” meetings (open to all students) to promote dialogue and inclusivity within our community.

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This winter, the Upper School held a day-long “Race, Identity, and Storytelling” symposium, with programming including a student panel and a presentation by artist and activist Keith Knight.

Voices Of the DMC “The experiences I have had over the three years I have been part of the DMC have positively shaped my experiences as an Upper School student of color. I used the safe space in the meetings as an outlet to share my stories or complaints, as well as listen to others, which has been very helpful to me. My high school experience would not have been the same (or as positive) had I not been a member of the DMC.” — Kaydi Zembow “Our experiences are unique but familiar.” — Simon Covington “The existence of a diverse student and teacher population 11

is one thing; the understanding of what such equity provides and how it is important is another. I feel that to reach a greater level of equity at CFS, we need to take the time to educate the student body about why equity and diversity are important. Not educating the student body about why such equitable outreach is important can lead to uncomfortableness about diversity conversations or accidental mistreatment of students from diverse backgrounds — symptoms of a lack of equity on campus.” — Roya Safi “I really like having a safe space to share. I don’t have to worry about what I’m saying or hav-

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ing someone judge me (for how I feel). I like being able to talk with people that I can relate to and who understand where I’m coming from.” — Anonymous “At CFS being a student of color can be difficult sometimes because most of your peers don’t share the same ethnic background as you. The DMC is very important, because it’s a place where students of color can interact with people who have similar experiences. For me, the DMC has always been a place where I feel safe to be myself and share my experiences. — Karina Heyward-Rotimi

Alumni Spotlight Bonnie J. Morris

I am a 1979 graduate and one of the first Middle Schoolers to take the class titled “Women,” which was offered in 1973 in the spirit of the feminist revolution then underway all over the country. I thank the School every single day for this early, timely immersion in serious issues of gender equity: at 12, grinning through a mouthful of braces, I had excellent preparation for the real issues of womanhood to come. I was able to read Ms. Magazine from its first issue of publication because the Middle School library subscribed to it and put that magazine out for every kid to read. I was encouraged in other ways to take roles (from athletic to theatrical) that would be reserved for boys only at other schools. And I absorbed other lessons from the openness of my teachers. By the time I was in the Upper School, it was natural to continue taking women’s studies classes and to march for the Equal Rights Amendment. Boys and men joined these activities — is there anyone cooler than a CFS guy? All of this made me the women’s history professor I am today, and I have credited CFS in many of my books. But the real world is sadly lacking in the CFS commitment to justice. Nope, we still lack an 12

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Equal Rights Amendment, equal pay, equal air time for women’s sports, equal power for women in the arts. Nor have we vanquished domestic violence. The challenge, especially given the conditions of our current administration, is for all of us children of the 1960s to go forward without burnout. For me, a unique place at the table involved coming out as a lesbian while still a teenager, and legally I have lived through tremendous changes, legal and social and cultural, participating mightily in all actions to get there. In an era of backlash against immigrants and refugees I draw on my own experience with being “illegal” as a person to pursue compassionate justice. I also know that telling the story of one’s own life is a radical step toward forging community. I can barely keep away from the School, I have such love for it in my heart. I return when I can from wherever I live. Because I felt welcomed and SEEN every day I was confident and pursued my interests freely. I see many young women who lack that feeling of independent inquiry and/or a place in a safe extended tribe. My wish is for the school to continue its work in making radical girlhood possible.

Calling All Alumni! Our community is large, and growing ever larger, and we want our alumni community to be able to grow as feels right to you all. We know we don’t have accurate contact information for many of our alums, and that’s a place to start.

With many of our long serving staff nearing retirement, we know your stories and experiences can be meaningful to them as well.

We’ve put together a brief survey to help us update your information, as well as a chance to reflect on what you hold dear from your time at CFS.

www.cfsnc.org/alumnisurvey

We hope you’ll complete our brief survey, and we thank you!

Ariana Nicholson ‘15 is a social and environmental justice major at Clark University in Worcester, Massachusetts. She has over five years of experience as a community organizer and currently works as a Summer Program Fellow for the Sierra Student Coalition. She is also excited to return to CFS this summer to teach social change-making with our Summer Programs. She attributes her work with the Upper School Quaker Advocacy class as the spark that ignited her career in environmental justice. Ari recently shared with us some of the ways in which equity informs her work: “Climate change is a huge threat to humanity’s continued existence and is currently causing huge negative impacts for frontline and marginalized communities across the world. However, climate change is not our fault for not riding our bikes or failing to change our light bulbs. Rather, climate change is the result of a social and economic system built on white supremacy, patriarchy, exploitation through capitalism, and colonialism. If we want to solve climate change, we must address its root — systemic injustice. Through targeting institutions that perpetuate the status quo of dirty extraction and overconsumption, we have an opportunity not just to save ourselves, but also to bring about a just transition to a better world.”

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Examining Equity throughout CFS

Educational Access: Our New Tuition Program Katherine Scott We know that access to a quality education like we are able to offer our students is limited by many factors, but that the driving motivator is affordability. Educational costs across the country have risen ever higher as the disparity in wealth distribution has further deepened. Independent schools in the U.S. have been greatly impacted by these shifts, as need for financial assistance has increased. Full tuition has become unattainable for whole segments of the population (including, according to a leading educational consultant, primary care doctors, academics, dual-income families, and families with multiple children). In 2012, the Board of Trustees began a process to create a plan of action to secure educational access for current families and those like them, as well as to broaden access for families for whom a CFS education had previously seemed unattainable. An ad hoc committee on Accessibility, Affordability, and Sustainability was formed, and after years of examining models of other schools, collecting data with the assistance of educational consultant Ian Symmonds & Associates, and assessing growth trends and historic and current costs of providing a CFS education, the Board developed a new tuition program. Beginning this year, we now offer a tuition range for each unit, complemented by an increase in funds available to support adjustments to tuition costs. Goals for the new tuition program include: better meeting the expressed need of current families; consciously removing the stigma attached to receiving financial assistance as opposed to offering a range of contributions; offering a mission-aligned tuition model consistent with the values of our community; enabling families with diverse incomes to be able to consider CFS; enhancing opportunity to intentionally increase economic diversity across units of the school; and elevating our classroom 14

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and community experience with a greater variety of voices and experiences. To begin the funding for the program, a tuition increase was set at the top of the range. Even a tuition at the highest end accounts for only around 84% of the full value of a CFS education. In addition, members of the Trustees have personally pledged $268,759 this year to support the program, and our advancement team is currently working toward foundational and philanthropic support to fully sustain the program and help us meet our aspirational vision. Although we will not begin to know the full impact of the new tuition program until 2018-2019, there are already positive advancements that we are eager to share with you. As of mid-May, total admission inquiries have increased by 14%. Several prospective families spoke to the importance of the displayed tuition range and new program as an important factor in their consideration of our School, including those who were previously interested but thought they could never afford the cost. Total admission applications have increased more than 10% over the previous year. We saw a significant increase in the number of current families submitting financial information for adjusted tuition consideration, and the number of students we are able to serve has increased from 26% to 33%. We know that we are just at the beginning of implementation of this model. Yet we are so excited at the amount of potential impact that a fully and sustainably funded CFS tuition program can have on our ability to support our work in both providing and broadening access to a truly exceptional education and in building an incredible learning community.

Examining Equity throughout CFS

Affinity Group Supports Parents of Students of Color Inclusivity was a key component of the last selfstudy, and one of the goals identified by the staff Diversity & Inclusivity Committee was to discern how to better nurture and supprt students, families, and teachers of color to feel empowered in our community. After listening to parent concerns and interests, CFS supported the launch of a Parents of Students of Color affinity group in spring 2016. The work of the group provides parents of students of color a voluntary space to share experiences for support and to build and strengthen relationships, provide a platform for feedback to staff and School leadership, and promote dialogue within the CFS community on issues of race, ethnicity, equity, power, and privilege in part by sharing stories and experiences of students of color and their parents. This year, 61 parents across multiple units held gatherings and worked together with the Diversity & Inclusivity Committee to organize ways the entire campus could engage on these issues together.

Triangle Diversity Alliance Last October, 180 high school students and chaperones from five area independent schools came to CFS for the 2017 Triangle Diversity Alliance Conference. The day featured nine different workshops facilitated by CFS Upper Schoolers exploring issues of identity, privilege, what it means to be an ally, forms of protest, activism, and how to dialogue across difference.

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Examining Equity throughout CFS

A New Director for Advancing Equity Among the School’s inclusion goals identified in the last self-study process was creating a Director of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion to help more fully realize our aspirations in this area. After years of ground work, this spring we began a search for this new position. We are excited to announce that Naa-Norley Adom will be joining us to begin this exciting new phase of our work! Naa comes to us most recently from Durham Academy, where she served as Upper School Diversity Coordinator and taught English. There she instituted “What Matters to Me Day,” a day exploring issues of diversity including women in STEM, microaggressions, LGBTQ representation in comics, and the difference between race and ethnicity, among others. She also advised a students of color affinity group and was a member of a student-elected non-disciplinary board of teachers who provided resources for students with substance abuse problems. Before arriving in Durham, she taught at Stone Ridge School of the Sacred Heart in Bethesda, Maryland, where she also served on the Upper School Diversity Committee. While there, she cofounded the annual “Beyond the Dream” contest for students focused on the contributions of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and chaired the committee that organized an annual Multicultural Festival. She has an MFA in Creative Writing from Hollins University and a BA in English and Africana Studies from Goucher College. While the brief interview below provides a point of introduction, we hope you will help us welcome Naa more fully into our learning community beginning this summer. What drew you towards the CFS community? I’m drawn to the CFS community for so many reasons. The main one is that the tenets of a Friends 16

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education are in line with my personal, educational, and leadership philosophies. I’m excited to work in a school where everyone collaborates to support students from all walks of life, and honors and celebrates all their idiosyncrasies. What about this new position most excites you? I’m excited about this position because it connects all the things I love about being in school. I really enjoy doing research and collaborating with colleagues to provide an educational experience that makes students feel confident about who they are. I also strive to take the next step by preparing students to be adults who can identify and speak up about various types of injustice. I’m also excited to learn from my new colleagues and hopefully share what I’ve learned. What do you do for fun or personal fulfillment? I’m a big nerd in general, but I’m a music nerd primarily. I was the kid who would listen to a new album straight through with the liner notes in hand. It’s no surprise that my partner is a musician and that I live in Durham. You’ll definitely see me at the Art of Cool Festival and MoogFest. I also read a lot to unwind. After growing up in New York and being afraid of nature, no one is more shocked than me that I’ve started to enjoy hiking and camping.

Examining Equity throughout CFS

Building the Beloved Community This April, CFS partnered with Organizing Against Racism (OAR) – Durham, Duke School, Watts Street Baptist Church, and the Durham Shambhala Center to host a half-day “Groundwater Presentation: An Introduction to Racial Equity” event presented by Deena Hayes-Greene and Dr. Jennifer Schaal of the Racial Equity Institute (REI). CFS has been partnering with REI to provide training for staff, and the Diversity & Inclusivity Committee, together with the Parents of Students of Color,

Above: Over 160 attendees came to campus for the “Groundwater Presentation” in mid-April. At right: The fourth annual Beloved Community Dinner & Dialogue provided an opportunity for smaller group discussions on how to counteract racism in our systems and ourselves.

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wanted to provide an opportunity for all in the CFS and local community to engage in this meaningful work together. To build on the powerful and thought-provoking information shared, the annual Beloved Community Dinner and Dialogue continued to examine bias in our systems, providing small working groups with a chance to explore opportunities for ways in which we can together bring progress on inequity in our society.

Athletics Spotlight

New Opportunities Coming with Tri-TAC Aden Darity Beginning in Fall 2018 there will be a good deal of change across the athletics landscape throughout the state. For the first time in its history, the North Carolina Independent School Athletic Association (NCISAA) will be moving to a 1A/2A/3A/4A classification system. In the past, schools have only been classified as 1A, 2A, or 3A. This system is based on school enrollment in grades 9-12. Carolina Friends School will remain 2A, but three schools in our current conference, the Eastern Plains Independent Conference (EPIC), Cary Christian School, Grace Christian School of Raleigh, and St. David’s School, will be moving up to 3A certification based on their size. Many schools and conferences across the state will experience similar shifting and a number of new conferences are in the process of being formed. I am very excited about these classification changes from the NCISAA and think they will be good for CFS and for the state, moving forward. After much consideration and planning by member schools, along with guidance from the NCISAA state office, 2A schools from EPIC will combine with 2A schools from the Triad Athletic Conference (TAC) to form the Triangle Triad Athletic Conference (Tri-TAC), with competition beginning in Fall 2018. The Tri-TAC will consist of the following schools, all of which are 2A: • American Hebrew Academy • Burlington Christian Academy • Carolina Friends School • The O’Neal School • Salem Baptist Christian School • Trinity Academy of Raleigh • Trinity School of Durham and Chapel Hill We are pleased with this move for a number of reasons, including:

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• The Tri-TAC will be an exclusively 2A conference. • Playing in a completely 2A conference will provide competitive games for our teams and more opportunities when it comes to state playoff seeding. • While we will still schedule non-conference games with schools and organizations across all classifications, we will be competing with only 2A schools for conference championships, as opposed to schools that might be much larger in size. • We have competed with all of the new and current conference members in various nonconference and conference competitions. • The Tri-TAC will continue to provide a great level of competition for our teams. • The Tri-TAC schools are philosophically similar in terms of athletics and will work together to foster a great competitive atmosphere for our students. Again, we are excited about these statewide and conference changes, and we look forward to TriTAC action beginning in the fall! If you have any questions or would like more information, please feel free to contact me. Thank you for your ongoing support of our teams. Go Quakers!

Questions? Contact Aden Darity Director of Athletics 919.383.6602 x222

Winter Sports Highlights Girls’ Basketball All-Conference: Emma Hales Boys’ Basketball All-Conference: Todd Neville Swimming Conference Championship First and Second Place (50m freestyle and 200m backstroke), State Championship First Place (50m freestyle): Duncan Charboneau

Stay tuned to our Fall/Winter issue for spring and fall sports highlights and exciting academic achievements by our graduates and rising seniors!

A Note from the Board The Strategic Planning Committee, which is composed of trustees, staff, and student members of our community, is currently working with a draft strategic plan that is not yet in final form. The committee’s work will continue over the summer with the goal of sharing its output with the full Board this fall. 19

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Community News

In Appreciation of Our Retiring Staff We are extraordinarily grateful for the many contributions of the long-serving staff retiring this year. Some have chosen to share reflections with our community.

Those who know him best will not be surprised to learn that even in his leaving, John is determined to build something lasting and good for CFS. He and his wife, Nancy, have recently advised us of their intention to make a gift to spark an effort to raise funds for a new Campus Sustainability Fund. John’s vision is that earnings from this endowed fund will support projects that help maintain the natural beauty of our campus, ensure ongoing environmental stewardship, and/or create educational opportunities around these important topics. Believing that many in the CFS community would enjoy an opportunity to express their appreciation for John’s heart-and-soul commitment to our School, we are inviting contributions throughout the coming year to create lasting impact on campus. John McGovern came to Carolina Friends School when there was no gym, Center, or Campus Early School, when the Upper School log building had just been built. Graduating from Sidwell Friends School and UNC, John eagerly became a part of the CFS community. He and his wife Nancy even got married on the deck of the Upper School. In all those years, he has been a Lower School teacher, Co-Head of the Lower School, Head of Building and Grounds, Athletic Director, Interim Head of the School, and Upper School Teacher. His two children are ‘lifers’ at CFS, with Jonathan graduating in 1997 and Erin in 2000. John most recently has served as the Assistant Head and coach of the varsity tennis teams.

If you would like to recognize John McGovern’s service to CFS or if you simply want to help make sure our campus remains the beautiful, welcoming and environmentally friendly place we all love, please make a donation to the Campus Sustainability Fund today using our secure online giving portal: www.cfsnc.org/donate.

John is retiring with 43 years of experience at CFS.

We & Thee | Spring/Summer 2018

Tom Shewey is retiring from Sky Class in the Lower School. Growing up in California, he attended UC Davis, earning a B.S. in Zoology, and spent an additional year there earning his elementary teaching credential. After teaching four years in public school in California, Tom moved to North Carolina. He went on to earn a Masters in Education specializing in learning disabilities and emotional handicaps from UNC. He is married to Annie Dwyer, who teaches dance at CFS. His two children are graduates of CFS. His daughter, Blake, graduated in 2002 and his son, Banks, graduated in 2005. Tom enjoys cooking, reading, gardening, and spending as much time as he can at the beach. Tom is retiring with 38 years of CFS experience.

Bob Druhan has taught or is currently teaching most of our math and science offerings. He has most recently taught physical science (chemistry and physics). Bob has an A.B. in English from Spring Hill College, a B.S. in Geology from the University of South Alabama, an M.S. in Geology from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, and an M.A. in Geology from Princeton University. In 1991, he helped to develop what has become the End-ofYear Experience program, a model in co-curricular learning experiences. Bob is retiring with 33 years of CFS experience.

We & Thee | Spring/Summer 2018

This is a letter of love to my community. For more than half of my life, CFS has been the mothership for my professional, personal and family life. She greeted me when I was a newlywed, fresh out of graduate school, ready to sink my teeth into middle school language arts and to envision a future library for the Middle and Upper School. She helped us raise two beautiful children…now two adults for whom her guidance has inextricably shaped who they are as people, how they see the world, and how they interact with others. She was my silent partner, as I explored the expansive landscape of ideas with kids, both within and beyond the classroom, as I witnessed and participated in a powerful, intentional Quaker community, and as I walked miles across her campus, especially when the heaviness of life drew me even closer to nature. Mig has been well suited in her dual role as teacher and Middle School/Upper School librarian, with an M.A. in English and Masters of Library Science. She has been teaching at CFS for over 30 years, and is the parent of two CFS graduates. Mig taught English and multimedia electives, incorporating her passion for technology with appropriate integration in her teaching. She has for years taught a “Dance and Video” class with Annie Dwyer, and co-led an Exploratorium on “Law & Order” with Rachel Anderson. Mig has also produced several short films for the School.

There has never been a day at CFS when I did not revel in the exuberance, intelligence, and kindness of kids. They always lift my spirits when I’m having a bad day, and their unconscious wisdom about the world is astounding. I also know that this is an exceptional relationship between teacher and student here at Carolina Friends School— one that dismisses the notion that the oldest person in the room is the undisputed expert, one that believes everyone has a vital role to play in the understanding of truth. Being a “lifer” has enriched my life immeasurably….as a teacher, advisor, media specialist, parent, and friend. With profound appreciation and gratitude, Mig Little Hayes

Mig is retiring with 32 years of experience at CFS.

We & Thee | Spring/Summer 2018

As I gather my thoughts this frosty morning, I revel in the warmth that has drawn me into the circle for the last 14 years of my professional and personal life at CFS. Every morning, I have paused to draw the tangible lightheartededness and solid support into my breath and focus. I am so grateful for each of your shared moments with me – a glance, kind word, blissful smile. Thank you! I look forward to our next times together. My new life takes on the fullness of Grandmother! With my eldest daughter expecting her first born daughter mid-March! I will be back around as an active “former staff person,” playing with the celebrations that are coming up in the new year! Best wishes to all and many thanks, Laura Shmania

Working in the Development/ Alumni office, Laura Shmania’s responsibilities included gift records, receipts, and thank you notes for the many donations made by our parents, alums, staff, and grandparents, and reconciling accounts with the Business Office. She also kept the database up to date, served as a liaison to the Parent-Staff-Association (PSA) and Alumni Committee, and enjoyed working with volunteers, coordinating all school and alumni events. Laura had 15 years prior experience in independent school administration, as well as an M.A. in Early Childhood Education from UNC-Chapel Hill. Her daughter Amy graduated from CFS in 2007. Laura’s artistic pursuits include photography. Laura is retiring with 14 years of CFS experience.

We & Thee | Spring/Summer 2018

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Walking in the footsteps of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. in Selma. Drawing inspiration from the stories of civil rights organizers. These are just a few of the experiences shared by a group of Middle Schoolers on an annual end-ofyear Exploratorium trip. Each year, Exploratoria allow students a chance to take a deep dive into topics of interest through three one-week sessions. We couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t provide incredible learning experiences like these without your support of the Friends of Friends School Annual Campaign. There is still time to make your gift count!