We & Thee, Summer 2021

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SUMMER 2021 SUMMER 2021


$167,031 RAISED $81,500 LEADERSHIP AND MATCHING GIFTS 452 DONORS THANK YOU! More donors in these groups gave on Giving Day 2021 than on any previous Giving Day:

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78

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Staff

Alumni

Grandparents

108 Parents of Alumni

92 donors Have given to all three Giving Days!

GIVING

DAY 2021


Carolina Friends School is a vibrant and inclusive learning community empowering students to think critically, creatively, and independently. We foster active exploration and quiet reflection, individual endeavor and collaborative engagement. Inspired by Quaker values—pursuit of truth, respect for all, peaceful resolution of conflict, simplicity, the call to service—we teach our children that it is possible to change the world.

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A Note From Karen

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Keeping the Dream Alive: Updates on Our Strategic Vision

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Self-Study Concludes, Reflection Continues

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Capturing the Past, Connecting to the Future

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Teachers as Learners

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Learn More About Durham’s Black History

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4809 Friends School Road Durham, NC 27705 919.383.6602 | www.cfsnc.org

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The Joy of Movement

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Update from the Parent-Staff Association

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Athletics Update

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Congratulations to the Class of 2021!

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Alumni News

Celebrating Recent Retirees

Karen Cumberbatch, Head of School Katherine Scott, Editor Cover photo by Katherine Scott. Photo credits include: Aden Darity, Paula Januzzi-Godfrey, Ruffin Powell, Jacob Prosnit, Jenni Scoggin, Katherine Scott, Ahmed Selim, Angela Stuesse, Kim Sulman, and Laura Shmania.

This spring, the Upper School performed Macbeth for a limited audience. You can watch the recording online! https://youtu.be/yCGWpQC32R0

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A Note from karen This summer feels in many ways like an ideal time to breathe, reflect, and re-focus. While the pandemic is far from over and will continue to affect our lives into at least the immediate future, I’m so grateful for the advances and community commitments that allow for this time to reconnect with others and with other aspects of our work here on campus. In the face of an extraordinarily challenging year, there is much to honor and celebrate. Our students and staff showed strong resiliency and commitment to each other, both in-person and virtually. It’s incredible to think of all the ways our experience was successfully reimagined, but I know we are all looking forward to the opportunity to return more fully to relational and experiential learning in community — a hallmark of a Carolina Friends education. I hope that the entire global community can soon return to relative safety as vaccinations and mitigation tactics continue. While there continue to be uncertainties about the coming year, we have created a solid framework that will allow us to remain adaptable while also returning to larger, broader, and more long-term thinking. You’ll see in this issue an update on our strategic vision, “The Dream That Drives Us,” as well as plans to build on our curricular review begun as part of our self-study toward reaccreditation. You can also find some of the creative ways our students continued

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to learn and grow this year, and how our teachers strengthened their practice. Please join us in celebrating all of our students’ achievements, especially those of our graduates, as well as the retirements of some long-serving staff. We are optimistic that the coming year will provide additional ways for us to re-connect with the greater community, each other, and this incredible campus. We are currently working on an opportunity to come together to celebrate our recent retirees, as well as rescheduling “Celebrating Dance and Each Other,” organized by Annie Dwyer and Carrie Huff. There is much work needed to support healing for individuals and groups within our community who have been so impacted in the past year and a half. I hope that these events help provide a way to refuel that light inside us all. Whether you are nearby or far away, remember that you will always be a part of our learning community, and we hold you in light and love. In friendship,

Karen Cumberbatch


For her Senior Legacy Project, Willow Walker asked Upper School students what words come to mind when thinking of Carolina Friends School and its community members. She then painted collected adjectives in speech bubbles on sidewalks and roads across

campus, creating a “scavenger hunt of love and positivity.” You can learn more about this and the other projects of this year’s graduates at https://www.cfsnc.org/seniorlegacy21.

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Keeping the Dream Alive: Updates ON our Strategic Vision In January 2020, Head of School Karen Cumberbatch shared with the community “The Dream That Drives Us,” the strategic vision for the next stage in the life of Carolina Friends School. This vision is centered on three goals: to become a beacon of inclusion and equity; a learning environment for the students of the future, now; and a global resource and exemplar for child-centered education. Informed by years of thoughtful work and discernment by many staff, trustees, and students, we had already begun several initiatives identified in the vision statement and were eagerly launching into new and exciting work when the coronavirus pandemic altered our plans. Despite this, and on top of the incredible community effort to reimagine our educational program this year, we have been able to keep momentum on this important work, albeit on an adjusted timeline. A BEACON OF INCLUSION AND EQUITY Several steps have been taken toward better recruiting and retention of staff and families of diverse backgrounds. We worked with a nonprofit marketing consultant to identify current and new audiences and develop new, distinctive ways to communicate our mission. New hiring rubrics and interviewing materials that assess candidates’ demonstrated cultural competence and understanding of how power and inequality impact students, staff, and families have been developed. Additional professional development funds have been allocated specifically for ongoing diversity, equity, and inclusion opportunities for staff, and we have begun our work to increase endowment support for our adjusted tuition program. As part of our self-study process, our staff together examined our curriculum through the lens of cultural responsiveness and affirmation. We will continue to use this examination to revise and enhance our curriculum. For the coming year, we will begin adding part-time diversity, equity, and inclusion coordinators within the teaching units, and are looking to hire an admission associate who will strengthen existing community partnerships and build new ones. We are also developing an Equity and Justice Committee of the Board of Trustees, reviewing our admission process with an eye to accessibility, and planning to support additional affinity groups for students and families.

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A LEARNING ENVIRONMENT FOR THE STUDENTS OF THE FUTURE, NOW To ensure market-aligned compensation for our staff and create greater equity and transparency in compensation and evaluation, initial work had begun prior to the pandemic to create staff committees, with support from an educational compensation consultant and the Board, to evaluate our current model and create recommendations that holistically examine compensation. That work has been on hold, but we are eager to pick it up in earnest in the fall. Toward strengthening our student support team, we are welcoming our first middle school counselor in the coming school year. The work to create a new campus master plan, including assessing facility needs for Upper School students and staff, initially slated to begin this past year, will begin this school year. We also have plans to add a third member of our technology team to better support teachers’ use of innovative teaching technologies. A GLOBAL RESOURCE AND EXEMPLAR FOR CHILDCENTERED EDUCATION Prior to the pandemic, research work on models for an institute for teaching, learning, and innovation had already been completed, and a comprehensive business plan for sustainability and growth was being developed. A support position is already in place for current initiatives that will fall under a new organizational umbrella, including Extended Learning, Peaceful Schools NC, and our global partnerships. We look forward in the coming year to more formally defining the structure of the institute, focused on the continued growth of our existing initiatives. We will also develop a timeline for developing our capacity to incubate educational innovations and develop enrichment, travel, and professional development opportunities across a range of ages. — Katherine Scott

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SELF-STUDY CONCLUDES, REFLECTION CONTINUES This spring, we received an enthusiastic reaccreditation from our team of representatives with the Southern Association of Independent Schools. The accreditation process provided a time for deep reflection as a staff through a self-study, and for thoughtpartnering with members of other independent schools in our region on how to continue to grow as teachers and community builders. The four members of our accreditation team hold roles in administrative leadership, advancement and admission, and diversity, equity, and inclusion in their own schools. After evaluating our materials and speaking with various staff members, parents and guardians, trustees, and students, the team prepared their commendations and recommendations. The sense of that group was greatly aligned with needs we had collectively identified, and we were affirmed in our plans for moving forward (as well as appreciative of their excellent insights!). Our self-study process had begun in March of 2018, led by a committee of staff members from across units and roles. Using input from our entire staff community, three areas of focus were chosen:

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Quaker values and pedagogy; culturally responsive culture and curriculum; and knowledge, skills, and understandings we teach. Through the 2018-2019 school year and part of 2019-2020, we spent time as a whole staff, in units, and in small groups to complete the self-study. Our exploration of Quaker values and pedagogy included discussions and writings on where and how our mission is made visible in our work, opportunities to strengthen that connection, and where Quaker values appear in our curriculum. We plan to continue our curricular examination in this way. To examine how culturally responsive our school’s culture and curriculum are, the self-study committee partnered with our director of diversity, equity, and inclusion. The result was a robust professional development program that began with individual self-reflection on identity and biases then worked through defining culturally responsive practice, creating an inventory of those practices currently in use, and identifying where in the curriculum improvement was needed. Moving forward, we plan to begin a crossunit examination of the educational journey of our

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students from Early to Upper School to ensure equity and to create organizational goals in diversity, equity, and inclusion. Across ages and stages, we as a staff recognized that our curriculum is vibrant, responsive, and student-centered, but that documenting it in a way that is accessible to new staff, families, and community partners is challenging. The self-study committee selected the “Know, Understand, Do (KUD)” framework created by Carol Tomlinson to lead curriculum examination by subject areas in the Middle and Upper Schools. The Early and Lower Schools identified a need to place special attention around literacy skills and to come to consensus on a shared approach. While initial KUD rubrics have been documented, the Early and Lower Schools plan to complete their subject area documentation, and in the coming school year, the entire staff will return to cross-unit work in examining the knowledge pathways of our students. A curriculum committee will be formed to finalize this internal documentation and to create a presentation of our curriculum that is simplified and outward-facing.


SWEET AS HONEY This year, a group of Lower Schoolers were able to not only observe our campus apiary up close, but also to help harvest the honey! Sales were able to cover collection expenses and provide some additional funds for our growing Bee Program. Drawing by Ruby Lou King.

Many thanks go to the self-study committee: Lisa Carboni (co-clerk), Kip Kuhn (co-clerk), Aden Darity, Carly Chapman, Jenni Scoggin, Katherine Scott, Leon Ikenberry, Matt Arnold, Will Fulkerson, Carly Campbell, Carmen Raynor, Jonathan McGovern, and Nylah Jimerson, as well as Renee Prillaman and Naa Adom, for constructing experiences and a process that honored the work and enabled us to engage meaningfully and productively.

KNOW: Facts, principles, definitions UNDERSTAND: Make connections and see application DO: Demonstrate understanding through action

— Katherine Scott We & Thee | summer 2021

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CAPTURING THE PAST, CONNECTING TO THE FUTURE Henry Walker’s video interview project If you’ve been following staff member Henry Walker’s remarkable video series — over a dozen school history interviews with past students and staff — you know what a profound service this project is for the larger CFS community. In his fiftieth year as a beloved Middle School history and writing teacher, Henry personifies CFS for many of us who were in the first wave of his student advisees in the 1970s. His familiar, pun-laced, and cozy but thoughtful style has proven to be ideal for relaxing alumni and colleagues during Zoom interviews onscreen. The results are hours of authentic stories, memories, and insights into the long-term influence of the School: what Henry called “an empathic leap into the past” during one interview. I participated in two interviews as a subject, but chiefly took delight in watching my own classmates and former teachers narrate their past school days and current projects. 10

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Halfway though the pandemic year, as I watched Friends School history unspool onscreen surrounded by the comfort of my California redwoods, I noticed how Henry had once again led us to be producers and consumers of stories: his ultimate gift. In the videos, over and over, we hear onetime Middle Schoolers who are now artists, professors, and lawyers tell Henry that whatever their situations were before arriving at CFS, and no matter how rocky their eventual teen years in the Upper School and in college, Henry’s writing classes in the Middle School years constituted a safe harbor. We wrote and wrote and wrote. We practiced not just the production of our own ideas and visions, but we practiced listening to others. We were allowed to be critics who did not criticize; rather, we offered, and accepted, suggestions. At ten and eleven, we may still have battled over the front seat


in the carpool, or jeered the contents of one another’s sodden brown-bag lunches, but in creative writing hour we gained the poise and skills of constituting a respectful audience. Reading a fresh story aloud to the golden circle of peers made me the public writer I am today; moreover, when I dare the embarrassment of opening up my diary from 1974, I find many entries detailing what my classmates, as well as Henry, said about how I might strengthen my stories. No one mocked. The environment was one of perfect, authentic feedback. These skills of mutually supporting one another translated into other artistic venues, too. As an Upper School student invited to join Middle School students in watching a Middle School play, I recall being struck by how appreciative and enthusiastic the Middle Schoolers were as audience to their own classmates.

Learning to hear another’s story and to share one’s own is the basic formula for a lifetime of reading and writing. Henry’s videos reveal a variety of ways that CFS kids and staff grappled with exposing our life challenges, and respecting those of others in our community. We also made history as self-aware members of a unique school at a unique time and place in American history. I saw, in the videos, quite a few of us becoming once again just kids on the carpet in Henry’s homeroom, reading aloud to a circle of trusted peers, an hour that was one safety net in an unstable world. — Bonnie J. Morris ’79

View Henry’s Videos at:

https://friendsschoolanunofficialhistory.blogspot.com/

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TEACHERS AS LEARNERS The latest from our Teacher in Review action research program This June, our entire staff was able to enjoy presentations from two colleagues representing the most recent participants in our Teacher in Review program. This opportunity, developed for Carolina Friends School by Assistant Head for Teaching and Learning Renee Prillaman, provides a way to deepen and enrich the art and science of teaching through a mentored, questionbased action research project. Once an area of growth is identified, research is gathered from a variety of sources. A teaching strategy is then developed, implemented, and assessed.

PREVIOUS PROJECTS • Effective Use of Science Journals • Student-Directed Learning Through Storytelling • Making Algebra Relevant • Student-Centered Learning • Digital Portfolios Through Wikispaces • Integrated Science & Storytelling • Authentic Assessment Strategies • Formal Assessment Through Digital Interaction • Inviting Students to Ask Higher Order Questions • Math Workshop to Support Achievement and Disposition • Portfolio Assessment in The Early School • Student Meta-Reflection on Art Portfolios • Strategies for Teaching Modern Immigration • Nature-Learning and Risk-Taking in Early Childhood • Active Engagement in the Social Studies Classroom • Teaching Young Children to Listen Deeply • Teachers’ Use of Information from Children to Support Child-Parent Interactions • Somatic Understandings to Inspire Lower School Children and Teachers

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Ahmed Selim (who goes by Selim), who teaches film and language arts in the Upper School, focused his project on examining how to go from transactional to transformational through creativity. His research led him to sources ranging from transpersonal psychology to Sufi teachings. In his work with students, he found that in moving beyond self-actualization to transcendence, a community must build a “container” together. That container holds a safe space where teachers and students alike are comfortable co-learning together. He cited the importance of a commitment by teachers to both continually work on oneself as an individual and to bring students to a sense of “safe uncertainty” that enables discovery and growth. Matt Arnold teaches language arts and philosophy in the Upper School, and chose for his project to create a class on the methods of teaching for Upper School students interested in offering studenttaught classes. In addition to concrete details like how to create lesson plans and activities, he and the students explored some of the more challenging aspects of how to bring flexibility to those plans that allow for meeting students where they are in their interests and understandings. Matt spoke to the important difference between teachercentered work and student-centered work as a framework. Both Selim and Matt began their projects during the 2019-2020 school year, and were forced not only to reimagine their teaching during the course of the pandemic but also their action research projects. The steadiness of the framework — as Matt described, “deliberate question plus deliberate data equals deliberate takeaways” — also embraces the Quaker idea that truth is continually revealed. Much as in teaching, the focus of the Teacher in Review process is on the journey to realization and growth.


LEARN MORE ABOUT DURHAM’S BLACK HISTORY Paula Januzzi-Godfrey, who retired from Durham Public Schools after more than 35 years, joined us this year to teach a Lower School virtual cohort. She developed a “Black History Walking Tour of Downtown Durham,” and we’ve included some of the highlights so that you can begin your own walking tour!

Foster Street, Near the YMCA: Find the colorful mural of Pauli Murray Rev. Dr. Pauli Murray, a twentieth-century human rights activist, legal scholar, feminist, poet, Episcopal priest, labor organizer, and multiracial Black, LGBTQ+ community member of transmasculine experience, grew up in the West End neighborhood of Durham. Her social justice tactics, legal strategies, speeches, letters, books, sermons, and poetry are models for our ongoing activism aimed at dismantling the oppression s/he faced — and continue to face — because of white supremacy, sexism, and oppression based on sexual orientation, gender identity, and gender expression.

Parrish Street: Find a hat, a big penny, and the Black Wall Street sign Black Wall Street became a hub of Black-owned businesses on Durham’s West Parrish Street during the early 1900s. Businesses in the district included professional practices and skilled workers. The very first African American bank and second-oldest minority-owned bank in the United States, Mechanics and Farmers Bank, was founded here. Durham was also home to North Carolina Mutual Life Insurance, which to this day remains the largest and oldest African American life insurance company.

Morris Street, Durham Arts Council: Find the Civil Rights mural The woman depicted in the yellow dress on the “The Durham Civil Rights Mural” is Virginia Williams. History remembers her as one of the Royal Seven, an activist who sat in at a storefront in Durham before the Greensboro Four garnered national support three years later. “It wasn’t until people actually said that we had changed history that I understood,” Virginia said. “It took me a while to realize that I had been a part of change. I’m the only one left in Durham to tell the story. When I speak, I’m speaking for the Royal Seven.” We & Thee | summer 2021

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THE JOY OF MOVEMENT As a physical education teacher, what I hope to encourage in my students is a lifetime commitment to health. That could mean anything from competitive athletics to walking a dog each day; what matters most is making it appealing. The students I teach at Carolina Friends School range from elementary to high school. They aren’t motivated by things like disease prevention or health benefits. They aren’t even interested in the word “exercise.” They want to do things that help them feel successful and confident, and to have fun. Our dream as a physical education department is to have our students choose to move and be physically active for life. You never want to tell a child to exercise in order to lose weight. You have to find fun activities that they want to do, for 30-60 minutes a day. I’ve seen a lot of parents become very anxious over how to get their children to move more, and the best advice I can give is to do it together and to make it silly. It starts in the home, in the family room or the backyard. Modeling that behavior for your children and celebrating real effort are the most important steps you can take. You don’t have to be good at it either; show them that it’s okay to not be good at something yet and that with effort you will all gain new skills along the way. Here are some easy ways to get started: Buy, build, or find a wide range of toys and equipment, and allow for creativity. One of the most popular activities we do with our students, across ages, is building creative obstacle courses, indoors or out. You can throw pillows and cushions on the floor for a family round of “floor is lava.” Kids love to make up games. Get silly with them! If you want your child to love moving their bodies, join them in making it fun. Sometimes we adults forget what it’s like to get on the ground or just be goofy. Even if you’re managing hectic 14

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“Modeling [the fun of being active] for your children and celebrating real effort are the most important steps you can take.”

schedules, 30 minutes spent together in physical play is guaranteed to make you more productive, and everyone happier. Give your kids voice and choice. Even with traditional sports equipment, children will find new ways to use it that keeps them engaged — encourage it! We use the flying disk game Kan Jam in our classes. They work in pairs and try to hit a can with a frisbee. Some can manage to do this pretty well, but others can’t. It’s okay if they decide to do something else creative with those things, as long as they’re moving around. Go for walks in nature. If it helps, you can schedule time to walk in your daily routine, or you can make the walk more exciting by visiting a park, trail, or playground. Utilize your community spaces!


Find ways to turn your house into a playground. Rolled up socks can be used for “snowball” fights. Wear socks on smooth floors and pretend to ice skate. Take turns standing in place and finding elaborate ways to throw soft foam balls at each other. I once wrapped my kids’ feet in rags and squirted floor cleaner down. Did the floors get really clean? Maybe not. But they still remember how fun it was! Encourage healthy risk taking. Let your child attempt new skills by themselves. If they want to cross the monkey bars, don’t lift them up. Allow them the chance to figure out what they can do on their own. Identify safe spaces where they can test their strengths and ability to solve problems. You can learn so much by observing how your children tackle these challenges. Taking

Congratulations to three of our Middle School students whose submissions were selected for the Friends Journal Student Voices Project 2021! You can read writing by Chance Biehn, Kavi Gibson, and Lian

healthy risks is an important part of building both muscles and self-esteem. Variety is more important than specialization. Once your child is ready for organized sports, let them choose a variety of activities to try. Specializing at a young age doesn’t prepare them if they decide they don’t want to do that one activity anymore. Try indoor and outdoor sports, team and individual sports. This will increase confidence and camaraderie, build skills in all planes of motion, teach strategy, and, more than anything, show the impact of resilience and effort. They’ll learn how to manage winning as well as losing in a way that helps them grow as humans. — Kim Sulman, Assistant Director of Athletics and P.E. Teacher

Petrella (among authors from other U.S. and international Friends Schools) on the project’s website: www.friendsjournal.org/ studentvoices2021

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UPDATE FROM THE PARENT-STAFF ASSOCIATION We would like to first express a deep and sincere thank you to our two dedicated and long serving co-conveners Mary Slawter and Sudi Laura Overstreet. They have been guiding and coordinating the ParentStaff Association (PSA) committees and activities for four years and have always been ready to step in and help with any activity wherever needed. They were very generous to continue in their roles when we were all faced with the uncertainties and restrictions of the pandemic. Thank you for your outstanding commitment and service to the CFS community.

Our approach for the PSA We have been evaluating and reimagining how we can best fulfill the PSA mission “to foster a strong, cohesive all-school community.” Based upon our own experiences, discussions with staff, and feedback from the community, we propose an approach that starts with small groups (by class, grade, or interest area), then builds on those close connections and sense of community outward in layers or ripples that extend across each teaching unit and then the whole school.

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Bringing the approach to life The PSA Liaisons for each school unit (Early through Upper School) play an integral role throughout the school year in building community and supporting staff and parents. In addition, the PSA has several schoolwide initiatives to build community which adopt the approach of fostering close connections that ripple outwards. In June we launched Welcome Buddy Groups, each consisting of several new, nearly-new (families who joined in 2020), and returning families. Each Welcome Buddy Group will meet up during the summer through informal, outdoor get-togethers. We hope these small and intimate groups will create a “soft landing” for families new to Carolina Friends School and serve as an opportunity for new, as well as returning, families to build connections prior to the start of the school year. The pandemic has presented us with an opportunity to reimagine the large (more than 500 person) all-school picnic that, prior to 2020, was held at the start of the school year. Depending on pandemic conditions

“We propose an approach that starts with small groups (by class, grade, or interest area), then builds on those close connections and sense of community outward in layers or ripples that extend across each teaching unit and then the whole school.”


OUR NEW CO-CONVENERS Ingrid Arnold I moved from the UK with my husband and daughter in 2018. We felt an immediate affinity with Carolina Friends School because of its grounding in nature as a source for wonderment, learning, and global responsibility. We were also drawn to being part of a community where differing perspectives are explored and individual uniqueness is respected. I have great hopes for how we can re-energize our connections and community as we emerge from the challenges and restrictions of the pandemic. Emily Tsai My family joined Carolina Friends School in 2018, having moved to Chapel Hill from Tokyo, Japan. As parents of a student of color, and finding ourselves in a world of growing divisiveness, we were attracted by the school’s origin and its mission to resolve conflict peacefully, build community, and inspire students to take action. I am excited to have a chance to meet more families, and contribute to building the community that originally attracted our family to the school.

in August, the PSA plans to hold back to school gatherings separately for each unit. We are hopeful that these smaller gatherings will be easier for families to navigate, enabling everyone to meet other families with students of similar age and interests. Another aspiration is the creation of an Athletics Committee consisting of representatives from each unit who plan activities around home athletics competitions, encouraging families to “pack the stands” and cheer on our athletes while also having fun. Athletics can be a great way to develop a sense of

school identity and spirit, and coming to games can help create interest and excitement among younger students, fostering their desire to participate in athletics upon rising to Middle School. We look forward to engaging further with the all-school community in the fall — to gather and share ideas and to form plans for additional initiatives that build connections and strengthen the sense of belonging within the Carolina Friends community. — Ingrid Arnold and Emily Tsai, PSA Co-Conveners

Mock trial student success This year, two teams of Upper School students competed virtually in the North Carolina Mock Trial Program. One team earned Runner-Up for our region, the first time a team from our school had advanced to regional finals. Upper School theater teacher and Mock Trial advisor Austin Campion ‘02 writes that “I believe that both of these teams were the best we have ever fielded. Whether they happened to move ahead or not, they put in superlative preparation. It’s a real challenge and it’s made even harder in quarantine. These kids crushed it.”

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CELEBRATING RECENT RETIREES Annie Dwyer retired at the end of 2021 after 31 years teaching dance and movement to Lower, Middle, and Upper Schoolers. Her entire teaching career has spanned over 40 years, and she continued to bring new passions to her teaching, most recently including interests in anatomy and somatics. A friend and former colleague commented, “Through the medium of dance, she has made it possible for a generation of students to make — and audiences in community to witness — growth, beauty, possibility, and meaning in the expression of the life we want to live and the world in which we want to live it.” Charlie Layman retired at the end of 2021 after 31 years teaching in the Lower School. He was a founding teacher of Mountain Class, until transitioning into River Class. Beginning in 1998, he also served as Staff Clerk. He reminisces, “Beginning and ending the day with a few minutes of silence, seeing the happiness of the children, and working with the fantastic staff was literally life-changing. I thought to myself, ‘This is what education should be.’ Being at CFS was like coming home. There was so much joy and remarkably rich experiences that really engaged children and teachers.” Deloise Dudley-Mayfield (DeeWee to many) retired at the end of 2020 after 43 years teaching in the Lower School. She was a founding teacher of River Class, and is well known for her establishment of the Lower School Kwanzaa celebration and her role directing our voices at the all-community Martin Luther 18

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King Jr. Day program. To the staff, Dee wrote, “This amazing journey began when Don Wells hired me. He has always said that he knew I would be a perfect fit for the school. I accepted the job with no clear leading that I belonged at the school. My time at Carolina Friends School has filled me with a sense of purpose and belonging that none other could offer.” Michael Bonsignore retired at the end of 2020 after 40 years teaching in the Lower School. He was a founding teacher of Forest Class and helped bring maker education to our classrooms. Michael wrote to staff that this will forever be “a place I have grown up, raised my family, celebrated, mourned, dreamed, made lifelong friends and helped build a school. This loving and supporting community has always been there for me and my family and for that I am deeply and forever grateful. I have traveled this journey with some of you for years and others, decades. To all of you, you have my heart and hold the story with me.” Renee Prillaman retired at the end of 2021 after more than 22 years at Carolina Friends School, having served in positions ranging from Middle School teacher, Lower School Forest Class teacher, Middle School Head Teacher, and over the last seven years, Assistant Head of School for Teaching and Learning (and a brief stint as Interim Head of School). In her time with us, she helped establish Peaceful Schools NC, the CFS two-year new staff orientation program, the Student Success program, the Teacher in Review program, and the Triangle Heads Leadership Academy.


ATHLETICS UPDATE The pandemic continued to have a big impact on our winter season, preventing our girls’ and boys’ basketball teams from competing interscholastically. Our swim team, however, was able to compete both virtually and by the end of the season, in person with modifications. We want to celebrate our coaches for going above and beyond to create as positive an experience as possible this year, as well as our studentathletes, particularly our seniors, for their dedication and teamwork.

WINTER HIGHLIGHTS Swimming State Championship Competitors: Laura McDow (200IM, 100 Breast), Samantha Wilson (100 Free), Olive Rugani (100 Back), Shannon Dolina (50 Free)

SPRING HIGHLIGHTS Boys’ Golf Michael Schaal, AllState, Competed in State Championship Boys’ Tennis Suni de Silva, All-State State Championship Semi-Finalists Boys’ Ultimate Hosted the Quaker Invitational Ultimate Tournament, Championship Finalists Track and Field Pilar Covington, 2nd place, 200M, Conference Championship; State Championship Competitors: Pilar Covington and Mason Lanier

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Congratulations to the class of 2021!

Sam Joseph Aurentz Arden Lysne Beam Nicolette Therese Bonsignore Charlotte Henderson Bourne Zoe Elisa Brader-Araje Samuel Justin Brothers Sawyer Davidson Cherry Meta Stridiron Covington Pilar Shaw Covington Sunimal Matthew deSilva Anton Brophy Dubois Lillian Mae Duffy Charlotte Elizabeth Dunn Liana Rachel Eisner Jasper Ewing William Andrew Dees Felker Benjamin Jacob Fuguet Zoe Eleanor Gehtland William Riley Hassell Sebastian Eric Hodgins Zoe Michele Kramer Catherine Meixiao Kunz

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Matthew David Lee Birtukan Simone Lomax Paula Dawn Lyerly Elijah Stephen Daniel McDow Molly Rose McLay Sydney S. McLean Lincoln Smith McRae Ava Ruth Meisner Riley Michael Mill Coletrane Jackson Murphy Sivan Jasmine Ornstein-Luks Lillie Mae Robertson Griffin Riley Roupe Amir Alexander Safi Dipali Shrivastava Emma Vengosh Weinthal Teagan Ann Walker Willow Grace Walker Jianing Wang Zoey Wisniewski Chaitan J. Wong Alexandra Lynn Zemon


Where They’re Headed American University Appalachian State University (4) Boston University Brown University Bryant University Carleton College College of the Atlantic College of William and Mary Columbia College Chicago Davidson College (2) Elon University (4) Haverford College Johns Hopkins University Kenyon College Middlebury College New York University

North Carolina A & T State University North Carolina State University at Raleigh (3) Oberlin College Tulane University of Louisiana University of North Carolina at Asheville University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill (4) University of North Carolina Wilmington (2) University of North Texas University of Vermont University of Wisconsin - Madison Villanova University Virginia Commonwealth University Wake Technical Community College Washington University in St Louis

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Alumni News NEWS & UPDATES Congrats to Bonnie Morris ’79 on the publication of her 18th book, a poetry collection, Earlier Households, on January 12. Rebecca Laszlo ’80 started a new position as Interim Executive Director of Georgetown Community Development Authority (GCDA) in Seattle Washington. GCDA is a communitybased organization bringing together working artists, industry, and community stakeholders in the Georgetown neighborhood of Seattle. Her initial task is to build a professional property management team and prepare the foundation for the eventual permanent Executive Director who will follow her.

Work by J.T. Lucchesi ’90.

Help Becky Lang Clodfelter ’84 raise money for ALS (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis) research, while fighting her own battle with the disease. Learn more: https://www.gofundme.com/f/helpbecky-access-critical-als-medication. John Grimes ’84 relocated from Raleigh to the Boston area, where he works in the MIT department of chemistry’s instrumentation facility as operations manager. He trains graduate students to use nuclear magnetic resonance to analyze the molecules they make. J.T. Lucchesi ’90 recently showed his work at Further Frames in Denver, CO, in late June. After first dreaming about it back in middle school at CFS, Ayesha Ahmad ‘93 will finally begin a career as a full-time high school English teacher this fall in Charlottesville, VA, while still running her wedding and portrait photography business (now in its 12th year) on the side. Rachel Afi Quinn ’95 married Eesha Pandit in Texas in 2018. Over the last decade, she also earned a PhD in American Studies from University of Michigan (2012) and this year was granted tenure at University of Houston in Comparative Cultural Studies and Women’s, Gender and Sexuality Studies. Her first book has just been published! Rachel, daughter of Ike Walker ’95, rowed in the US Rowing Youth Nationals in the Women’s U17 2x Time Trial.

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We & Thee | SUMMER 2021

Look for Being La Dominicana: Race and Gender in the Visual Culture of Santo Domingo by Rachel Afi Quinn ’95 (pictured now and then!).


Alumni News Alums Jess Shell ‘97 (also a current staff member) and Jasmine Powell ’04, along with current staff member and parent Maggie Bradley, participated in Pairs in the Park, a collection of site-specific duets choreographed by Chris Yon and Taryn Griggs and presented by American Dance Festival at the North Carolina Museum of Art Park. Mark Cromwell ’99 and his wife Katie welcomed Sophia Grace Joanne Cromwell on February 7.

Holly Triplett Curtis ’04 and Dan Curtis.

Annie Dwyer shared that Hart Griffith-Zill ’01, Becky Tate Jones ’08, and Anna Jaffe Ruderman ’08 have all had babies recently. Any Given Day, a documentary scored by Eric Kuhn-Fink ’01, had its world premiere at Hot Docs Canadian International Documentary Festival in Toronto on April 29, 2021. Holly (Triplett) Curtis ’04 married Dan Curtis on December 21, 2019. Daniel Toben ’07 was recently featured in a story by WRAL for his work in cleaning up trash from local highways and streams.

Daniel Toben ’07, as featured on WRAL. This novel edited by Jeramie Orton ’09 was selected for Reese Witherspoon’s Book Club!

Jeramie Orton ’09 is an editor at Penguin Random House, and a book she edited, The Sanatorium by Sarah Pearse, was selected as the February pick for Reese Witherspoon’s Book Club. The novel is an atmospheric, lockedroom thriller set in the Swiss Alps and is perfect for anyone who loves detective narratives. Samantha and Hannah Strom ’09 just launched an advice podcast, Closely Related! Hannah is a therapist that specializes in sex and relationships and Samantha is a career and leadership coach. Listeners write in questions about love, work, and everything in between. Listen and write in at closelyrelatedpodcast. com! Congratulations to Zuri Powell ’10 and Gen Yamagishi ’10, whose lifestyle/clothing brand, Belief Over Opinion, has been selected as the OFFICIAL clothing brand of Ancient World Gaming Esports. Daniel Jubelier ’11 started a new job this past April as a US Organizer for BlackRock’s Big Problem Campaign. We & Thee | SUMMER 2021

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Alumni News Sydney Ray ‘13 just celebrated her “White Coat Ceremony for Doctorate of Physical Therapy.” Rhiannon Sanders ’13 is now legally a Registered Professional Nurse and will soon be working in the Operating Room at Northside Hospital in Atlanta. Jessie Anderson ’14 has had her first nationally distributed design via Feetures. Check out her limited edition tie-dyed mini-crew running socks on feetures.com. Lex Jin Coelho ’15 moved to Boulder, CO, and accepted a new job as a digital art director at IMM - Ideas Made Measurable. Best wishes to Anna Kasibhatla ’15 and Ruben Cruz on their March 1 marriage. Marisa Rauwald ’16 is working as a Content Services Coordinator and Tokyo Summer Olympics Researcher at NBC Sports Group. Draven Ward ’16 had her research paper “Military Service Member Exposure to Trauma And Impact on Parenting Styles” published by Lloyd International Honors College at UNCG in the publication Y Ddraig Goch: An Interdisciplinary Honors Journal, Volume 1, No 2, Spring 2020.

Tomorrow 2021) seeks to identify students at Duke, NC A&T State, NC Central, NC State, Shaw, UNC Asheville, UNC-Chapel Hill, UNC Wilmington, and Wake Forest with a passion for public policy. For his senior legacy project, recent graduate Will Hassell ‘21 transformed the circle of benches behind the Upper School Meeting Hall in memory of our beloved Jamie Hysjulien, who passed away from cancer in 2019. Thank you to Noah Hardy ’20, Sam Chilton ’17, Ian Cronin-Gilmore ’20, Gavi Fischer ’20, McKenley Johnson ’20, Maria Meriwether ’17, and Parker Sexton ’20 for Zooming in to be part of the annual “Life after CFS” panel discussion in January. A big shout-out to Will Anderson ’84, Zoe DeBenedette ’20, Aubrey Griffith-Zill ’05, retired staff member Carrie Huff, and current staff Kim Sulman and Aden Darity, for their Giving Day videos. There is video and trivia on Quaker Dome-Carolina Friends School Alumni on Facebook.

Mlana Lore ’17 is excited to announce that she has been accepted into the molecular biology PhD program at the University of ColoradoDenver and will be continuing her education and research there starting fall of 2021. Maria Meriwether ’17 will be joining the NIH’s National Cancer Institute for a two-year postbaccalaureate position as a research assistant. Tatum Schwartz ’18 was recently featured in Appalachian Today, for her service work and research efforts while majoring in Sociology at App State. Ben Westlund ’18 has accepted an internship at the Duke Global Health Institute as a research assistant for the Duke Clergy Health Initiative. Diane Gildehaus ’19 is interning with PILOT21 through the Institute for Emerging Issues at NCSU. PILOT21 (Policy Innovation Leaders for 24

We & Thee | SUMMER 2021

Zuri Powell ’10 and Gen Yamagishi ’10, modeling their lifestyle/clothing brand, Belief Over Opinion.


Alumni News Last spring, as the class of 2011 marked the tenth anniversary of their graduation, they also were coming to terms with how best to honor the life and passing of Marnie Cozzens. A few years earlier, we lost another graduate of that year, Alex Kenan. This class has long been known for their care for and commitment to each other in the face of tragedy. As Benita Cozzens, Marnie’s mother, has reflected, they are “a group that had been searching for a place to belong together.” One way our larger community can honor these two individuals we’ve lost and their incredible class is by donating to their individual endowments at www.cfsnc. org/donate, providing opportunities for students both now and in the future in their memory. Marnie Cozzens Endowed Library Fund Marnie was creative and talented and had many of her poems published. She also had a gift that encouraged and supported others to pursue their own personal journeys and discover their sexual identities. The endowment in her name supports acquisition of books, collections of poetry, and a variety of media that support and honor LGBTQ+ voices for the Upper School library’s collection. Alexander Kenan Endowment for Outdoor Education Inspired by Alex’s love of the outdoors, his family has created a fund to enable future generations of young people to learn from outdoor experiences, challenging themselves to move beyond their comfort zones where they will gain the confidence that will equip them to handle life challenges of every type.

HOLDING IN THE LIGHT Gayl Talbert, mother of Matt Frey ’20, passed away from complications from Covid on April 3, 2021. To express condolences, you can write Michelle Frey and Matt at 21 Covington Lane, Durham, NC 27712. Former Upper School Head Teacher Robert William Fulks Jr., who worked at CFS from 1976-1988, passed away on June 27. Condolences may be sent to his son, alum Robbie Fulks ‘80, at 4231 Edenhurst Ave. Los Angeles, CA 90039. Condolences to retired staff member Dee Dudley-Mayfield on the death of her dear mother.

FORMER STAFF NEWS Congrats to Sabrina Aguilar-Simon, former Upper School Spanish teacher from the mid’90s, on her recent hire with El Futuro. Rachel Anderson will be attending graduate school to study conflict analysis and resolution and pursuing additional training opportunities in schools and other organizations after 21 years as a teacher and advisor with CFS. She is the mother of two graduates. Carly Chapman is pursuing a career in real estate after spending 21 of her 25 years in education with us. She is herself a graduate and parent of a graduate of CFS and looks forward to feeling the satisfaction of knowing that she will help make others’ home dreams come true, as her grandfather did. Leah Fulkerson will begin a masters program at UNC-CH this fall for school counseling, with a focus on elementary school counseling. Lisa Joyner and Randall Williams, former teaching staff, recently shared a minidocumentary about Fireside Farm, where they grow flowers and mill wood. Alums who have worked on the farm include Aaron Wynmor ’17, Anna Kasibhatla ’15, Ari Nicholson ’15, Ben Alexander ’17, Lauren Boyle ’18, Jillian Carboni ’18, and Patterson O’Sullivan ’15.

We & Thee | SUMMER 2021

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NONPROFIT ORG U.S. Postage

PAID

Durham, NC Permit No. 783

4809 Friends School Road Durham, Nc 27705 919.383.6602 | www.cfsnc.org ADDRESS SERVICE REQUESTED

RESCHEDULED! CELEBRATING DANCE AND EACH OTHER APRIL 8-9, 2022 Join us on campus for a weekend uniting former Carolina Friends School dancers and the community that celebrated them during their early years. Organized by Annie Dwyer and Carrie Huff, there will be two performances and opportunities for community participation.


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