Your Magazine Volume 12 Issue 3: December 2019

YOUR MAG

VOLUME 12 | ISSUE 3 | DECEMBER 2019

CONTENTS ROMANCE 3 HOT PRIEST: WHY WE WANT WHAT WE CAN’T HAVE

5 7 9 EDITORIAL 11 STYLE 19 21 23 26 EDITORIAL 27 LIVING 35 37 39 41 EDITORIAL 48 ARTS & ENTERTAIMENT 51 53 55 59 SENIOR SHOOT 61 YOUR THINGS 65 Y.MP3 67 ARTIST STATEMENT 69

EVERY ACHE BUT HEARTACHE FINDING LOVE OFFLINE WHAT IT IS LIKE TO RECONNECT WITH YOUR BODY EMBODIED THE ART OF OUTFIT REPEATING HOW FASHION NOVA CHANGED PLUS SIZED FASHION THE CATHARSIS OF BOX DYE VFW IS THE ETHICAL FASHION REVOLUTION HIDING IN TRANSPARENCY TOM’S ONE HOUR PHOTO I LIVE WHERE YOU VACATION WORKING ON NETWORKING HOW TO AGE GRACEFULLY SEEING DOUBLE BI BI BI:THE RISE OF BISEXUAL ANTHEMS THE FEARLESS DERMOTT KENNEDY THE BIRDS, THE BEES, AND WHAT’S THAT FEELING BETWEEN MY KNEES?

THE MAGIC OF CHRISTMAS LIES YM CLASS OF 2020 DAYSIA TOLENTINO SONGS FOR YOUR HOLIDAY PARTAYYY KATE GONDWE

YMEMERSON.COM | INSTAGRAM: YOUR.MAG | TWITTER: @YOURMAGEMERSON

1 | YOURMAG

EDITOR’S letter

YOUR Mag VOLUME 12 | ISSUE 3 | DECEMBER 2019

DAYSIA TOLENTINO

LILY WALSH

Editor In Chief

Co-Creative Director

MONIKA DAVIS

MADISON DOUGLAS

Managing Editor

Co-Creative Director

DITI KOHLI

KARINA SANCHEZ

Romance Editor

Head of Design

LILLIAN COHEN

TATIANA GUEL

Asst. Romance Editor

Assistant Designer

ANDY CAIRA

EMILY KING

E

very Tuesday morning I walk to work before dawn. It’s dark, there’s hardly any cars or people around, and the streets are quiet. It’s hard to be up so early, but it’s one of the only moments I have to myself

all day. Lately, I’ve been taking my time with the walk, looking up at the brick buildings along the end of Huntington Avenue. I think a lot about how

Style Editor &Street Style Director

Photo Director

different these buildings look from the buildings around Emerson’s campus

ISABELLE BRAUN

PALLAS HAYES

downtown. Then I think about how different those buildings are from the

A&E Editor

Asst. Photo Director

EMILIE KRONE

YELIZAVETA ROGULINA

Living Editor

Art Director

LEE ANN JASTILLANA ELOISA DE FARIAS Web Director

Editorial Director

ABIGAIL NOYES

GINA YORK

Copy Chief

Style Director

SHAWNA KONIECZNY LAUREN DILLOW Head Proofreader

Asst. Stylist

KATHERINE POWERS RANA SAIFI Asst. Proofreader

Talent Manager

ADRIANNA ALAVI

HANNA EL-MOHANDESS

Marketing Coordinator

Asst. Talent Director

ones in Los Angeles, my next destination and a pit stop on the way to my post-grad “real” life.

I’ve never been so uncertain in my whole life. From elementary school through college, there was always a plan, sometimes more than one. I’ve always been a big-picture thinker and a planner. I like to think of the different ways a situation can pan out or the different routes I can take to get to the same place. This time, things are a bit hazier. It’s hard to plan for what’s next, where I’m going to work, where I’m going to live. I moved around so much over the past three years; I feel like this next step shouldn’t scare me as much as it does. I am excited about finding a home somewhere new, but it’s difficult to leave the one I found here.

Tuesday nights are when the YM executive board meets. Your Mag has been my home for the past three years and these meetings have been an integral part of my routine. I love this magazine and all of the wonderful

TIANNA LOVERDE

people I’ve had the privilege of working with over the years. It’s very hard to

YMTV Director

let it go, but I am so excited for what’s next—for me and for this publication.

With that, I’d like to welcome you to Volume 12. Each semester, we

COPY EDITORS: KAITLYN HACKETT, CATE HAYES, ESTHER LIU, NATALIE

create a new volume of Your Magazine, each with three separate issues.

MICHAUD, MEHER GUPTA, TIVARA TANUDJAJA, ALLISON CARAVELLA,

The publication you are holding contains all of the work we created this fall.

MADELYN MULREANEY, KATHERINE POWERS, THOMAS GARBACK, JESS FERGUSON, NADIA HIBRI, ALLISON HUGHES, KATE HEALY, REBECCA LETTS, AMAYA SEGUNDO, CHARLOTTE DRUMMOND, ERIN RENZI, WEIMEI WANG

If you’re familiar with our work, you probably know that we typically only print the last issue of the semester. This time around, we wanted to show you everything on paper. Consider this a retrospective look at what we were loving and what we were talking about throughout the fall semester, starting

DESIGN: OLIVIA HEINZE, MARIANNA POLLETI REYES, MADISON GOLDBERG, GABRIELA PORTUGAL, HONGXI YAO, STEPHANIE SHIH PROOFREADERS: JIACHEN LIU, CHARLOTTE DRUMMOND, KIANA NGUYEN, ALLISON HUGHES, JESS FERGUSON, MARIANNA POLETTI REYES, KATHERINE HEALY, REBECCA LETTS, AMAYA SEGUNDO, TJ GRANT, MADELYN MULREANEY, CAITLYN ONG

from December and going all the way back to October. We hope that you love this collection of issues as much as we do.

I would say something cliche, like “this isn’t goodbye, it’s see you later,” but this really is goodbye, and a bittersweet one at that. Thnks fr th mmrs!

Love you all!

Daysia

YOURMAG | 2

Hot Priest: Why We Want What We Can’t Have

WRITTEN BY LILLIAN COHEN

Me, My Journal, and Masturbation 3 | ROMANCE

ART BY OLIVIA KELLIHER

P

hoebe Waller-Bridge has created a number of popular TV shows, including Crashing and Killing Eve. But it’s the second season of her Emmy Award-winning dry comedy Fleabag that has everyone talking—and weak in the knees.

Popularly referred to as the “Hot Priest,” Andrew Scott’s character meets the female protagonist Fleabag at an awkward family dinner where they discuss her father’s marriage to her terrible godmother. He’s set to officiate the ceremony. But that isn’t what’s been getting male-attracted people across the country to rethink their attraction to religious authority figures. Fleabag’s curiosity about Scott’s character turns from friendship to romantic love (and sex!). It is seen as taboo because of his sacred vow to the church and God, yet powerful and emotionally intimate.

Pornhub reports that searches for religious pornography spiked 162 percent the day of the UK season premiere, while “priest” and “nun” rose 103 percent and 145 respectively.

Even Waller-Bridge didn’t expect her priest character to gain such a following. “Obviously, Andrew is hot,” she admitted in her Saturday Night Live monologue while hosting on October 5, “but this priest character caused such a horn-storm.”

This isn’t the first time people have lost their minds over a “Hot Priest.” Father Brah from Crazy ExGirlfriend, played by Rene Gube, had a similar catch-22 with Valencia in season four. We even find out that they were secret lovers in high school and their breakup made him become a priest. Gossip Girl had one, too, in season five. And though Jack Ashton’s character Rev. Tom Hereward on Call the Midwife is not a priest, he is still a strong religious authority figure. He is sought after and has several relationships with women on the show. In fact, a large portion of his initial purpose was to serve the “Hot Priest” stereotype.

There are lots of different elements that contribute to the attractiveness of Fleabag’s “Hot Priest.” Dr. Lindsey Beck, a psychology professor at Emerson College, avidly watches the show herself.

TV shows will lead one to think that “heterosexual women like bad boys, so to speak,” she says. “But the fascinating thing from my perspective as a psychologist is that it doesn’t match the literature at all. It turns out that women and people of all genders actually respond to generosity. It directly conflicts things that people think they want.”

In fact, playing hard-to-get is actually a risky business, she says. “It tends to increase our desire, but damper our liking of them. We want them, but don’t actually like them very much.”

Beck points out that narcissists are often initially attractive since they put a lot of work into their appearance and look like fun. But ultimately, we lose interest as we get to know them better. It might work for a date or two, but not a long-lasting relationship.

“It’s actually not supported by scientific research,” she says, referring to lay theories, which are commonsense explanations given to social behaviors. People generally want warmth, kindness, responsiveness, sensitivity, and decency.

But the “Hot Priest” does more than just create a sense of sticky sexual tension for our beloved Fleabag.

He lends himself to the show in nearly every respect possible, mending her dysfunctional (and downright rude) family and removing her emotional crutches like her cynicism.

The “Hot Priest” embodies a lot of the characteristics that people look for in a partner, specifically emotional availability, says Beck. Scott’s character validates Fleabag and is motivated to help with her needs. That’s why he’s captured the popular sexual imagination of viewers across the country.

“A lot of the literature differentiates between relationships and short term partners, but the studies are the same…. These qualities are attractive across the board, in all genders, by all genders,” says Beck.

He’s not only a great face and body to look at, but a great guy. We see him performing normal priestly duties, like leading sermons and picking robes. And that actually adds to our arousal by adding the “bad boy,” off-limits taboo to the attraction. So he’s essentially the best of both worlds, making Fleabag and women across America hot and bothered.

Though physical appearances are also valued when finding potential partners, Beck says lay theories have established through years of data and research that it’s actually not the most important thing.

“Andrew and I were trying to figure out what it was about him that was driving women so mental,” explained Walker-Bridge during her SNL monologue.

“And we boiled it down and realized, it was because he was doing this one thing: listening. Really, really listening. Try it, guys!” YM

ROMANCE | 4

Every Ache But H

5 | ROMANCE

ART BY EMILIE KRONE

eartache I

fell in love with Daniel* hard. We went to museums, thrift stores, and film festivals together. When our relationship got serious, he told me he had chronic back problems. I didn’t really know what that meant.

Would it affect our relationship? Why did it take him so long to tell me?

“Particularly for a guy, it’s a sign of weakness if you show you have a problem in sex or say you’re in pain in any physical or emotional way,” senior visual media arts major Charles Solomon* says.

Solomon has chronic constipation issues, acid reflux heartburn, and possible nerve damage in his penis. He has never told a girl he’s interested in about his conditions.

“I wouldn’t want to jeopardize it by mentioning anything like that, because it’s a huge turn off,” he says.

“It would have to be at a point where it feels like I’m pretty confident that what I say won’t affect how they feel about me.”

Two months into dating Daniel, we suddenly stopped having sex. It went on for three weeks. I tried seducing him, but he kept turning me down. I told him I felt unwanted and sexually frustrated.

“This is why I didn’t tell you for so long. I knew you wouldn’t understand,” I remembered him saying.

I felt helpless. I wanted to improve our sex life, but I needed to be sympathetic towards him too. It’s hard to fix a situation when it’s out of your hands. Avery Higham and her partner learned this the hard way.

Higham was cooking dinner for her boyfriend when she started crying. She realized she had to touch raw chicken. The junior communication studies major is diagnosed with an eating disorder.

Higham’s boyfriend noticed, immediately asked what was wrong, and offered to help.

“I kind of pushed him away and said, ‘Listen, I just need space to myself right now. I just need to figure out this dinner. I can’t focus on you trying to help me on this. I need to handle this on my own,” she says.

Higham knew her boyfriend felt helpless. She understood how much he wanted to try to fix the situation, but he couldn’t.

While Daniel and I were driving, he offered to open our relationship because he was concerned I wasn’t sexually satisfied. I knew he was a monogamist, so this shocked me.

WRITTEN BY MELISSA MARIE ROSALES ART BY NATASHA ARNOWITZ

I felt bad I let him set aside his own physical health issues and relationship views, because he felt he was the problem. He thought if he didn’t adjust, I’d leave him.

That was the last thing I wanted to make him feel. Jane Spears* faced a similar problem.

After having sex with her boyfriend, Spears started sobbing. The senior journalism major is diagnosed with bipolar II disorder. She has an unsteady sex drive.

Spears wants to have sex all the time on her highs, but not at all on her lows.

Spears’ boyfriend didn’t know about her diagnosis, so he thought he did something wrong. That was when Spears decided to tell him.

“He just hugged me. I said ‘Do you not like me?

Is there something wrong?’ And he said, ‘I really appreciate that you told me this. Thank you for telling me. This helped me. If you want me to, I would love to continue to just understand you,” she says.

In the car I told Daniel, “There is no one else I would want to be with but you. I’m so sorry I made you feel this way. I want to work on this with you.”

I bought a vibrator that day.

Curtis Oviatt, a junior communication studies major at Millersville University, is missing a left foot from a lawnmower incident. Oviatt wears a prosthetic that he removes when he goes to bed or takes a shower.

He keeps his prosthetic on in the beginning of a relationship. This is a problem when he and his partner want to relax, take off their shoes, and watch a movie in bed.

“It can be a little discouraging when you think ‘Oh, the girl I just met doesn’t care I’m uncomfortable.’

But she just doesn’t know! People don’t always know right away, so give it time,” he says.

It definitely took some time, but I learned to understand Daniel’s condition. We talked a lot about our needs and found other ways to make sure we were both happy in the relationship.

“It’s not going to be easy. Whatever they’re feeling may not make sense to you but that is okay,” Higham says. “You’ve just got to show support and what that support looks like, only you and your partner can decide.” YM *Names have been changed to maintain confidentiality.

ROMANCE | 6

FINDING LOVE OFFLINE WRITTEN BY SOLEIL EASTON PHOTOGRAPHY BY JUNHO KIM

7 | ROMANCE

L

ong gone are the days of meeting your future partner at a bar, gym, or party. As a member of Generation Z, it’s safe to say we have a baseline fear of commitment. We grew up in an age where boredom could be instantly fixed by unlocking our smartphones.

From personal experience, I know many Gen Zers seem to think dating only happens online, welcoming apps like Tinder and Bumble with open arms.

Dr. Lindsey Beck, a social psychologist who teaches at Emerson College, says apps can allow people to meet potential partners, but also put people in a “consumerist assessment mindset.” “[Consumers] are evaluating potential partners not as potential partners, but rather as commodities or products,” Beck said. “With this comes a two-dimensional view of people, rather than a holistic perspective that we may get through face-to-face interaction.”

Researchers have found that apps work best if people use them to initiate conversation before an inperson meeting.

Melissa Rosales, a senior journalism student, dabbled in Tinder and Bumble for roughly two years before meeting her current boyfriend at her job at Legal Seafoods.

Rosales says most of the guys she met on Tinder said “just looking for fun” in their bios. After initiating conversation, she was constantly reminded they just wanted to have sex.

And Rosales isn’t alone in this affliction. After about a year of swiping left, Sarah Smith*, a sophomore journalism major, finally swiped right: matching with her current boyfriend of two months.

Even though dating apps are becoming less stigmatized, Smith still hasn’t built up the courage to tell her parents she met her boyfriend online. She didn’t even go on the app with the intention of starting a new relationship, despite the fact she’s had two boyfriends so far from Tinder. She mainly used it to pass time with her friends.

“As long as you’re smart about meeting people, I don’t think there is any harm in putting yourself out there,” Smith says.

The way relationships are formed have changed and will continue to change as time goes on, according to Beck. “The changes that occur will, in part, be driven by culture, surroundings, communication, and norms or standards relating to romance,” she explains.

Social media has the power to aid communication, especially in long-distance relationships. However, Beck

explains that it can also create jealousy, since we may be exposed to our romantic partner’s previous and current partners.

“There is this added pressure of knowing that they are also seeing other people and they know I am seeing other people,” Rosales says. “So it makes me wonder how can I stand out from the rest of the girls they are seeing.”

Though dating apps are now a common way to meet people, many still prefer to meet romantic partners in real life for the first time.

Abby Wu, a sophomore journalism major, met her partner on a family trip in Thailand two summers ago.

They felt an instant connection and decided to start a relationship despite the distance. They relied on daily phone calls and Facetime sessions until he moved to Boston from Thailand.

Wu is not a fan of the online dating trend, preferring to meet someone organically because she doesn’t like the idea of attraction based on looks.

“People have gotten so used to using technology to communicate and show love,” Wu says. “I think men still need to open doors for women or send flowers because seeing and doing things with each other in real life is more intimate.”

Similarly, Smith feels dating apps have altered the dating game, but wouldn’t say attribute killing romance.

Hookup culture, especially in college, has always been prevalent. Dating apps just make it more accessible.

If you are struggling to ask your crush out on a date in real life, here are some tips: 1: First flirt! If flirting is not your strong suit, don’t worry! Just make sure they realize you may be interested in them before asking them out.

2: Find a good place and time to make your move.

Do your best to avoid asking your crush out over text because it can be too impersonal. Being casual is the best way to go.

3: Be confident.

4: Avoid having a friend with you. It is best to ask someone out in private to avoid unnecessary tension and awkwardness.

It’s time for Gen Zers to delete Tinder and start connecting face-to-face, gaining confidence and a new perspective on romance along the way. It’s okay if not every date works out, at least you put yourself out there and gave dating in real life a try. YM *Names have been changed to maintain confidentiality.

ROMANCE | 8

WRITTEN BY DAMICA RODRIGUEZ ART BY NATASHA ARNOWITZ

what is it like to R

*Content warning: sexual assault AND MENTIONS OF DISSOCIATION

A

s a 15-year-old, there wasn’t much I really admired about my body. I would begin to say “I love” or “I admire,” but as my eyes scanned every nook and cranny in the mirror, I felt like my body wasn’t even mine. If anything, I felt like I had more in common with a mannequin—lifeless and disposable with no unique quality— than the reflection staring back at me.

Nights with my boyfriend would be the most confusing times. It’s not that I didn’t want to be intimate or be desired, but that I didn’t know if my body could be.

I knew something was deeply wrong when I started to feel detached again. I stood in the middle of the grocery store completely out-of-touch with everything I was doing: pushing the cart, grabbing the loaf of bread, even driving home.

Back then, I didn’t understand why. It wasn’t until I went to therapy for sexual trauma that I discovered these feelings were a result of my “body dissociation” diagnosis. Body dissociation is a disorder that often affects survivors, like myself, who have endured rape, sexual assault, or physical abuse. It’s akin to a defense mechanism where stressors of the traumas make your brain switch to “flight mode.”

My memories of the rape and sexual assault were often pushed back in my consciousness. No matter how much I suppressed it, the thoughts would paralyze me.

Every time I looked at my body, I felt like I wasn’t in control, as if my most intimate parts didn’t belong to me. My body existed in another place, tied to a part of my identity who knew what I was like before the assault.

Like many other survivors, I still felt the effects of the trauma long after the fact.

Ruth Eslinger, a shelter advocate specializing in counseling in North Carolina, says that body dissociation is common for most survivors who find themselves in any form of intimacy, both romantic or platonic.

“You could be doing something whether it’s sexual or just talking to somebody and you separate mentally,” she says. “It’s kind of like an ‘out-of-body’ experience where you’re looking down at yourself and separated from what’s going on”

9 | ROMANCE

Even in consensual relationships, I couldn’t help but feel like my body was broken. The parts of my body where I was supposed to feel sexy, empowered, and confident just felt like reminders of what had happened.

I felt like I was defined by my rapist.

Eslinger says that contending with identity is a large part of body disassociation, and while it’s not common, the disorder can disrupt a survivor’s personality. However, there are ways to combat body disassociation and feel connected again.

“The first step is to become aware of the fact that you’re separating yourself,” she says. “Once you’re aware of it, you can start to reintegrate with yourself by doing relaxed breathing or focus in on the opening and closing of your hand.”

Eslinger also suggests recognizing what specific triggers lead you to disassociate. For me, it was the scent of the Calvin Klein cologne my rapist wore. When I became aware of my dissociation, I remembered why I became so robotic in that grocery store. His scent had lingered in the air, but I couldn’t process it at the time. It was too painful. So mentally, I separated myself.

But how can we address body dissociation in the bedroom? What if we’re not mentally present for it?

“Make your partner aware of the possibility that it might happen [during sex],” Eslinger says. “Oftentimes what they can do is stop and take the time to check in with them and ask ‘is this okay?’ That way, the person who disassociates can respond and let them know how they’re feeling.”

I’m connected to myself now, but it comes in waves. My dissociation removed my sense of agency inside and out until I felt nothing. Admittedly, there was solace in that. The inner-turmoil of confronting what happened all at once seemed daunting. It brewed a whole other wave I couldn’t control.

What I could control though are the effects this diagnosis will have on me and my body. My traumas don’t have the power to define me or disconnect myself from a body that has survived and thrived. I’ll continue to pick up the pieces, one shard at a time, and hold them together for as long as I can. YM

econnect with your body?

ROMANCE | 10

EMBODIED 11 | YOURMAG

DIRECTED AND PHOTOGRAPHED BY TAINA MILLSAP ASSISTED BY ELOISA DE FARIAS MODELED BY ARIANNA MORA SHRUTI RAJKUMAR SARAH ASHMORE KEELY VENTRESS

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THE ART OF THe art of OUTFIT REPEATING OUtfit Repeating 19 | STYLE

WRITTEN BY LEE ANN JASTILLANA

C

her Horowitz shook my whole world when she picked out her outfit through a touchscreen monitor in the opening scene of Clueless. An overflowing closet and a system that ensures a fresh ‘fit every day sounds like a dream come true. Unfortunately, we don’t all live in Beverly Hills mansions, our dads aren’t all rich litigators, and we don’t all have rotating closets full of unworn clothes.

Just a step below layering tights underneath shorts, outfit repeating remains one of fashion’s most heinous crimes. In the cutthroat world of clothing, a different outfit every day is the gold standard. Take Carrie Bradshaw, for example, a character synonymous with fashion who is renowned for never getting caught in the same outfit twice.

Though wearing the same clothes again sounds perfectly reasonable—washing machines were invented for this purpose—the shame of throwing on the same ensemble still haunts us, and fast fashion companies thrive on our fears. According to a study commissioned

by Hubbub, a London-based sustainability firm, 41 percent of 18 to 25-year-olds feel pressured to wear a different outfit every time they go out. The same study also found that 33 percent of women consider an outfit outdated after wearing it three times. For dresses, 72 percent of women find the dress “old” after just one use.

Celebrities have taken a stab at normalizing replicate outfits. Comedian Tiffany Haddish proudly reused her white Alexander McQueen gown to a movie premiere, multiple awards ceremonies, Saturday Night Live, and a Netflix show, inciting a wave of media coverage. “I feel like I should be able to wear what I want, when I want, however many times I want as long as I Febreze’d it,” Haddish joked on SNL. Royal family members Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton also made headlines for slipping into dresses they’ve been photographed in before.

Though some celebs validate us, everyday fashion cues from social media push us right back into the same narrow mindset. Big social media celebrities like Bella Hadid and Kylie Jenner would never get caught dead posting (or even wearing) the same outfit twice. Daily fashion influencers also look like they have endless racks of clothing and always take pictures in something

PHOTOGRAPHY BY XINYI GAO

new. Getting fed this type of content makes it hard for fashion enthusiasts to not feel guilty about throwing on a repeat look.

We’ve done it, celebrities do it, so, really, what’s wrong about re-wearing the jumpsuit you shelled out $90 for and can’t return because you lost the receipt?

Plus, there are also many unpredictable circumstances that call for an outfit repeat. What if you wasted the outfit on a bad day? More importantly, what if you couldn’t get a good Instagram picture in it?

Wearing the same clothing combo again, for any reason, is perfectly valid. With the way college classes are set up, you could even pull it off flawlessly— your M-W-F crew doesn’t know about your T-Th wardrobe. The art of outfit repeating lies in how we inconspicuously get away with it.

As a regular repeater, I’ve got a few tips and tricks: When outfit-repeating, basic neutral pieces are key. Avoid vibrant, bold prints, as it’s easy to remember when someone wears the same print again. A neutral base outfit (which could even be a white shirt and blue jeans), can easily be refreshed when you throw on a different outerwear piece each time. Swap out your puffer jacket for a trench coat or your jean jacket for an oversized blazer.

Changing your shoe choice makes a huge difference when wearing an outfit again. Heels and booties make everything dressier, while sneakers create a casual, relaxed vibe.

Accessorizing helps monumentally. Add a belt on top of your blazer or dress to create a different silhouette or throw on a fedora or bucket hat to subtly change the look.

If you don’t have a huge collection of hats to choose from, try wearing your hair differently.

Try reworking the same shirt by wearing it unbuttoned, tying it at the ends, or even just cuffing the sleeves.

Most importantly, wear what makes you comfortable and happy. So what if MacKenzie from your 8 a.m. knows you wore that same dress four days ago? Get over it, MacKenzie!

In the words of Lizzie McGuire, “I might be an outfit repeater, but you’re an outfit rememberer, which is just as pathetic!” YM

STYLE | 20

How Fashion no plus-sized fash

I

don’t think you have the body type for that.” This is what I was told when wearing a curve-hugging outfit in front of my family. I remember wearing a bodysuit and cargo pants. I looked in the mirror and what made me feel beautiful slowly changed to embarrassment. It’s accentuating my problem areas. What made me think I could pull this off? I remember telling myself. All because of a single comment.

I had been insecure about my weight for a long time and being told stuff like that didn’t help. I was afraid to show my body and I was afraid of what people would say about it. I think a lot of my fear stemmed from how plus-size models were portrayed in the media.

In 2010, Ashley Graham starred in a commercial for a Lane Bryant plus-size lingerie line. The commercial was originally banned by FOX and ABC because it apparently showed too much cleavage. After Graham called out the networks, they let it play. “The first thing I thought of was Victoria’s Secret commercials, and how they’re just as racy, if not more racy than Lane Bryant.

They are just a lot smaller than what I am,” Graham said to the New York Post.

Growing up, I would frequently see Victoria’s Secret Angels on my TV screen and wonder why I didn’t look like that. I felt excluded from a club, in a way. Even now, I am not able to shop at VS because of their size range. VS only goes up to an extra-large and some other brands have the same range of sizes. For example, Abercrombie & Fitch, PacSun and Free People all only go to an extra-large. I am an XXL. Hope Brown from Coventry, Rhode Island has a similar opinion on sizes. “I feel like when a brand only goes up to extra large they exclude so many women and men, it makes us feel not wanted and not important to that brand,” she says. When did the idea of being “bigger” become so shameful? According to Christianna Moestue ‘20, there is still a lack of choice even in sizes not considered plus-size.

“If at the largest size I wear, a 14, I am already seeing an immense decline in available clothing options, then what about these women? The larger the size gets, the

21 | STYLE

va changed ion WRITTEN BY SYDNEY TAYLOR

PHOTOGRAPHY BY EMILY KING

few[er] ‘stylish’ options available,” Moestue said.

Plus-size clothing generally has less availability, and because of this idea I have always been taught to think that people like me have to wear baggy clothes or stray away from anything “scandalous.” However, that all changed recently.

In 2015, Graham, a size 16, became the first plus-size model to ever be on the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. In 2016, the International Journal of Fashion Design, Technology and Education discovered that the average American woman wears a size 16 to 18.

By this time, Fashion Nova, a strictly e-commerce website, advertised on Instagram frequently and was gaining popularity. Fashion Nova launched Fashion Nova Curve in 2017, and it continues to have a huge selection of on-trend clothing. This was one of the first brands to emphasize plus-size shapes, carrying the same clothing in straight and plus sizes. Many women began to love the brand.

Tangeia Smith, known as chief_tan on Youtube worked with Fashion Nova Curve from 2017 to 2018, and she thinks the brand is awesome. “They always have ontrend items in my size. If there were more brands doing so, I’m 100% sure other brands [would] love to have my coin,” Smith said.

Since the release of Fashion Nova Curve, there have been many changes involving trendy plus-size fashion and plus-size representation. Clothing lines such as Pretty Little Thing and Boohoo released affordable plus-size clothing lines, and there have been more genuine plus-size models in the media--genuine plussize models meaning apple body shapes rather than a small waist with big hips above a size 12.

Of course there is still room for improvement. Smith says, “I would just like to see more brands offering a wider variety of plus-size apparel. Trendy and timeless being key words in that. No couch patterns, no tent size shirts. We want to be able to feel sexy and fashionforward and all of that.” Still, plus-size representation would not be where it is today without brands like Fashion Nova. YM STYLE | 22

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The Catharsis of Box Dye A

WRITTEN BY OLIVIA CIGLIANO PHOTOGRAPHY BY LILY WALSH

n emotionally disheveled college student paces the dimly lit hair dye aisle in the Washington Street CVS. Should she reach for the powder bleach or black dye? Will she go Manic Panic “electric lizard” or Rihanna red? Only one thing is for sure: she forgets gloves.

Why is it an impulse to drastically change your hair in times of stress or uncertainty? Are the supply cost and hair damage really worth it?

Renee Engeln, a psychology professor and author of Beauty Sick: How the Cultural Obsession with Appearance Hurts Girls and Women, told i-D, “Making a radical change to your appearance can be a way of sending the message that you’re also making a radical change to your life—or that you’d like to.”

Rory Williard ‘22 has a colorful hair history, but only started dyeing it herself in college. “I dyed it bright orange two days before classes. I was moving away from my parents and that’s not something they would ever let fly. But also because I was going through a lot of change and stress.”

Most of her drastic hair changes were during her freshman year—from bright orange to blue to black, to both blue and black, and even bleaching her eyebrows.

She considered going platinum in a salon afterward, but her hairstylist refused. “I’m not going to do that because your hair will melt,” she recalls the stylist saying.

There’s a special satisfaction with doing the dye job yourself. Even if the hair comes out worse than it would at a salon, there’s power in the process. You have total control of your vision, are free from any judgment, and can spend the wee hours of the night on a highstakes challenge that removes you from real stressors.

“You know how people say ‘if you want something done right then do it yourself,’” says Willard. “It’s like that.”

That bright orange look is her favorite color she’s done, purely because of the satisfaction of doing it with her own two hands.

But if we dig deeper, this choice can satisfy a craving for control. When life throws a curveball, it’s natural to lose your footing. Either we no longer feel like ourselves

or who we once were is now feeling stale. A new ‘do can feel empowering, where you kill the old version of yourself and reimagine the next person you want to be, à la “The old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now.

Why? ‘Cause she’s dead!”

Box dye and I have a close personal relationship.

We only seem to hang out when I am fundamentally bored with life or having some sort of identity crisis.

I first experimented with bleach my senior year, just days after prom. I felt restless in my home town and was ready to move on to bigger and better things. I figured now that prom was out of the way, I didn’t care if I messed up my hair. I let myself indulge the impulse.

Using a Manic Panic bleach kit, I lightened a chunk of hair at the nape of my neck, referencing a photo of Kylie Jenner from 2013. I wanted the bottom of my hair electric blue and I wanted it now. Throughout the summer, I graduated to hot pink and purple, each unintentionally representing my mood and what I was going through.

Bleach and I reunited the October of freshman year when I, a very dark brunette, decided I wanted to go platinum. I rounded up my supplies, watched dozens of YouTube tutorials, and got to work. Needless to say, it came out a blotchy mess. I had to get it evened and toned in a salon. But, after two sessions, I had icy hair by Thanksgiving.

I loved it. It felt as if I left my high school self in the past, embracing who I was becoming at Emerson. I never expected to ever go blonde, but it helped me wrap my head around my personal and emotional growth. It was liberating.

Sure it’s superficial, but being comfortable with the outer expression of yourself is incredibly important in feeling happy with your inner self. When you feel good in your own skin, you’re more likely to embrace life.

“When you’re not confident with who you are as a person, a significant change can make you feel a lot better, like you have more control over yourself,” says Willard. “I felt like a badass.” YM

STYLE | 24

VFW is the Ethical Fashion Revolution WRITTEN BY OLIVIA CIGLIANO PHOTO BY EMILY KING

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egan Fashion Week is the newest addition to the sustainable fashion movement, and it’s taking an ethical approach to design. In light of Los Angeles’ ban on the manufacturing and selling of animal fur, set to take effect in 2020, Emmanuelle Rienda founded Vegan Fashion Week.

Vegan Fashion Week aims to increase awareness of animal exploitation and encourage fashion lovers to consider the consequences of garment manufacturing. Rienda told Vogue in January, “Now is the time to create a Fashion Week that shows how being vegan today is not only about animals— it’s about being good to all beings on the planet, humans included. It’s not a matter of style anymore. It’s a matter of choice.”

Before becoming a globally noted activist, Rienda, like most vegans, underwent her own personal journey that led her to activism. She moved to L.A. in 2008 from her birthplace Clermont-Ferrand, France to open an agency for fast fashion French labels to gain headway in the American market. At this point she was a vegetarian, but somewhere along the way she adopted veganism.

Since then, she felt the need to align her values with her work. Not only did she appreciate the environmental impacts of fast fashion, she also saw the toll it took on animals. She began styling celebrities, such as Disney star Olivia Rodrigo, who requested to be dressed in animal-free garments. Taken aback, Rienda found herself inspired by the next generation.

The event launched in February 2019 in LA with the theme “Facing Our Time” and received tremendous media buzz from the likes of Vogue and the New York Times. The

two-day tradeshow— held just before New York Fashion Week began — featured runways and the first vegan fashion showroom in history.

The “Future of Fashion” conference, also founded

by Rienda, took place as well, serving as a platform for industry leaders from designers to scientists to discuss fashion alternatives. Rienda told Vogue, “What I’m really trying to do [with VFW] is to create a platform to bring designers together and show that the future of fashion is actually here...

Our generation needs to act right now. I believe we can do it right away with what we wear and what we eat every day.”

VFW returned to the same city October 2019, themed “Fashion is Activism”, kicking off with a night of awards recognizing vegan creatives who work to protect fundamental animal rights. The show opened with New York designer ENDA, followed by Mayd in China, Patrick McDowell, Wasted L.A., Nicoline Hansen and Minttu Melasalmi and several more.

The models stomped on a matte black runway, showing off the eclectic but innovative designs. Each designer brought their own aesthetic to the stage, where ENDA served simple airiness, Minttu Melasalmi gave clean metallics and Nicoline Hansen showed architectural femininity.

Major fashion houses joined the movement in the past few decades, including Gucci, Donatella Versace, Prada, Giorgio Armani, Michael Kors, and most recently Maison Margiela. Many of these brands stopped designing with real fur after conversations with PETA and the Human Society of the United States. This shows that there is a place for activism in fashion—because it’s working.

The production of fur, leather and even wool is a disturbing process where millions of animals annually are killed for their skins. They are kept in cramped cages their whole lives, only to be killed by suffocation, electrocution and poison. Many Chinese fur and leather manufacturers skin animals alive as well. During the shearing process for wool, sheep commonly loose strips of skin, teats, tails and ears, and are beaten when they cry out in pain. Sustainability is the new buzzword in the fashion industry, but ethical material sourcing is just beginning to reach designers and consumers who care.

The VFW site features a quote by Rienda that reads,“The relationship between fashion, factory farming, and climate change cannot be ignored. Vegan sustainable fashion is the ultimate answer to climate change and waste pollution. I created an inclusive and collaborative movement dedicated to redesigning the industry and the consumers’ daily habits” as a “creative ode to the end of animal exploitation and a celebration of human evolution.”

More and more, consumers are taking back their power from big business by carefully choosing to support practices they align with. As the fashion industry continues to evolve at a rapid pace, with creatives taking initiative towards art with integrity, it’s up to the market of individuals to decide if ethics should continue to be embraced. YM

DIRECTED AND PHOTOGRAPHED BY MAYA PONTONE ASSISTED BY LILY WALSH

STYLED BY ******* MODELED BY SHAFAQ PATEL KATRINA DIZON WILL PALAUSKAS BRITTANY ADAMES

Hiding in Transparency

WRITTEN BY DAYSIA TOLENTINO ART BY YELIZAVETA ROGULINA

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crolling through the Instagram page for Tom’s readily available at all times. There is no need for a One Hour Photo Studio & Lab in Los Angeles, service like Tuong’s to exist anymore. Still, there is an you’ll see soft-focus portraits of people posing element of magic in Tuong’s portrait sessions and prints with plastic Greek columns and bouquets of faux roses. that is unparalleled in the age of iPhone photography.

Folks from Gen X to Gen Z are flocking to 60-year-old “I do think there’s a richer experience in going Tom Tuong’s studio to get pictures in front of airbrushed to an event and having your picture taken. I think that butterflies and clouds. The photos are reminiscent of a there is value in experiencing something more slowly, past era when teenagers would go to the mall, have a like having a really good meal,” says Schneider. fun photoshoot with friends, and share wallet-size prints As Tuong’s photos made rounds on social media, with each other. Many of Tuong’s patrons pay homage I began thinking about the wallet-sized studio portraits to this time period, wearing ‘90s-inspired slip dresses I’ve collected and given out over the years. While many and dreamy Y2K hair clips. of us may be too young to have experienced photo Tom’s experienced a major revival after country studios like Tom’s, we can remember sitting down for popstar Kacey Musgraves visited the shop in August. a portrait and giving those photos to our loved ones.

Prior to Musgraves’ visit, Tuong’s business was There’s a certain cheesiness to studio photography struggling. Now, appointments at his studio are booked sessions that takes us back to simpler times. Whether it months in advance, and Tuong’s services have been was our proms or senior portraits, we have all dressed featured at events for Playboy and up and smiled for a photographer Reformation. His studio has also with a big umbrella light. There was been visited by celebrity clientele “I think the world something particularly endearing like Busy Philipps and Colton about collecting mini mementos of has changed Haynes. our friends. Much like a yearbook, in such a way, Tuong’s shop is one of the last the little notes on the backs of especially in of its kind in the country. Tom’s is these wallet-sized prints served as photography one of only 121 remaining onesnapshots into our lives at the time— and this loss of hour photo studios, according to the who we hung out with, who we fell physicality, that most recent data from the United there’s something in love with, and who mattered to us.

States Census Bureau. This type of This feeling I had after seeing real about trying business came to prominence in the to have a physical Tuong’s photos captures the late 1980s and grew to 3,066 stores biggest draw of Tom’s One Hour experience” by 1998. They provided convenient, Photos— the nostalgia factor. The fast film development and printing aesthetic that Tuong presents is for everyday consumers. With campy and old-school. It makes the decline of film and the increased access to Gen Xers want to relive an experience, and it allows digital photography, one-hour photo shops quickly Zoomers to experience a time period that they were disappeared. Despite the hype that Tom’s received, too young for. Schneider believes that photography is most people aren’t really going out to get their portraits an inherently nostalgic art form because it is centered printed the way they used to. In some ways, that is a around capturing a moment from the past. Experiences good thing. that appeal to our senses of nostalgia, according to “Photo studios used to make their money by Schneider, are short-lived and fleeting. However, they holding on to the negatives, and they would sell people can also give us the opportunity to look directly at the back the prints. Now you can have a good camera, past and try to understand why it impacts us today. take a picture, and even with a regular inkjet printer, “I think the world has changed in such a way, you can make a pretty good print yourself,” says Betsy especially in photography and this loss of physicality, Schneider, a photographer and visual and media arts that there’s something real about trying to have a professor at Emerson College. physical experience,” says Schneider.

Schneider says that the purpose of photo studios Only time will tell if the boom in Tom’s business is was to process images for people who did not have just a fad. However, the popularity of his photos serves access to darkrooms. With the onset of smartphones as a reminder of our past and the pasts we weren’t and digital imaging, both the camera and the roll are around for, and why they matter to us now. YM LIVING | 36

G

rowing up on The Big Island of Hawai’i, it’s easy to feel like I’m on a neverending vacation. Going to the beach after school, visiting the volcano every year, and hearing a ukulele play everywhere I go have all become normal to me.

Many of the attractions and activities in Hawai’i are geared toward tourists. Because of this, there is little to satisfy the needs of residents. Considering that tourism makes up 21 percent of the economy in Hawai’i and is the largest supplier of jobs, it makes sense that activities in Hawai’i are geared toward tourists. However, this does not justify the negative impacts it has on residents.

I always found it an interesting concept that I live where most people vacation, and this seemed to really shift the way I grew up and the way I interacted with my hometown.

There are many issues that arise when tourism is the main focus of the place you call home, things that those who come and go don’t have to deal with. The first is the feeling of alienation and the lack of belonging.

Hawai’i is small; I find myself playing the “how many people can I recognize at Target” game every time I go. Yet, there is also a constant sense of having people around you that don’t seem to belong there. Sometimes, it feels like when your mom makes you give up your room for a family friend who is coming to visit for a couple of weeks. Business of creative enterprises major Laura Phillips ‘22 lives right next to Disney World in Orlando, Florida. Philips experiences a variety of tourists in her hometown but feels differently about how this affects her sense of belonging. “I didn’t really feel alienated or that I didn’t belong because I don’t think there was a culture that [tourists] were trying to stomp on. In other locations that are tourist destinations, I think that happens often and is unfair. As much as you want people to see the beauties of the world, you have to be more careful about it.”

Living in a place that people don’t tend to spend too long in makes everything feel slightly temporary.

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This modifies how young people, in particular, interact with their space. At times it can feel like your hometown is betraying you by catering only to these temporary people while you have been there all along. This is directly related to what things are accessible to you and what activities you partake in growing up. People come to experience certain things, and those things are usually unique and distinctive to that location.

That being said, I don’t find myself going out of my way to do touristy things. In fact, I try to avoid the commotion of certain beaches and parks simply because it feels like it was not made for me. This in itself is sad because many of those tourist attractions are popular for a reason; they are crystal clear beaches and historic landmarks that make Hawai’i what it is.

Yet the ones who get to enjoy and experience these spaces don’t know much about the context and haven’t learned about them growing up. This also drastically limits what there is left to do for residents since there is so much attention on these tourist attractions. Things like hangout spots for young people and activities to do on the weekend seem to go unnoticed and unattended.

We are all tourists at one point in our lives. So what can we do to avoid alienating the residents of the place we are visiting? Visual and media arts major Elizabeth Apple ‘22 was a tourist on the island of Maui this summer. “As a tourist going to other places, you want to be respectful. A way to be respectful is not to expect foreign places to cater to your niche needs,” says Apple.

As tourists, we should acknowledge the historical and cultural value of the place we are engaging with and be cautious of how we interact with these spaces.

We must also break the association cycle; correlating a specific life or experience to someone because of where they come from is dangerous. Philips says, “They think they know your experience growing up somewhere, but only you know your experience growing up somewhere.” YM

i live where you vacation WRITTEN BY ELOISA DE FARIAS

PHOTOGRAPHY BY PALLAS HAYES

LIVING | 38

WORKING ON NETWORKINg WRITTEN BY IZZY SAMI ART BY LILLIAN COHEN

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E

ver since high school, the only thing I wanted to ask the successful women I met was how they became so successful. Each time I asked them for advice, they would practically pat my head and say, “Honey, you have to network.”

It was almost funny how often I would get that response. Even now, adults are still pushing me to network. My academic advisor told me to write handwritten notes to every professional contact I make.

Professors remind me that now is the best time to make connections in my field. Even the people I meet through networking tell me how important it is to master it.

Master what, exactly? How to talk to people?

Essentially, yes. All it is, really, is talking to strangers and making yourself sound important and deserving of their email. More simply put, it’s making a friend.

You don’t walk around with a resume on your chest, and most people don’t care how high your GPA is or how many times you’ve made the Dean’s List. If you can make someone think you’re worth talking to just by making compelling conversation or making them laugh while standing in line at Trader Joe’s, that makes a better impression than where you’ve interned or who you know. That’s something you can throw in later, like, “I totally know what you mean about the importance of recycling. When I interned at [impressive place], I did an entire project on recycling.” Then, right before the conversation ends and you go your separate ways, casually ask for their email or LinkedIn. The key, in my experience, is timing. A week ago I was in an UberPool talking to my driver about how I was struggling to find a job. A minute later, we picked up a passenger who sat down and immediately pulled out his laptop. Continuing my conversation about work with the driver, I said something that made the new passenger chuckle. Taking this as a sign of interaction, I turned to him and asked about his job, and he told me he was a scientist taking classes at MIT. At the time, I was working on an article about women in STEM and needed a female professor to interview. I had a feeling

if I could make even a slight connection with this guy, he might put me in contact with someone he knew. It was perfect.

“This may sound really random, but do you know any female professors at MIT?” I explained the topic of my article and the challenge of getting an interview.

“Yeah, I definitely know a few you could talk to,” he replied. The car was turning onto my street. The window of opportunity was closing, but I only needed a minute. I asked for his Facebook--there’s a reason it’s called the social network--and gave him my phone.

When he added himself, I sent him a quick message saying “female professor contact.” As we pulled up to my stop I thanked him, got out of the car, and thanked the Uber gods for sending me the exact connection I needed at the perfect time. All I had to do was start a conversation with the person sitting next to me.

Nearly everyone you meet will have something that will benefit you, whether it’s a job opening, a recommendation, or someone else they can connect you to. Paul Niwa, an associate journalism professor at Emerson College, says the best networking comes from “treating people like people.” Niwa says he’s not a great networker, but advises that even basic acts of kindness will help you stand out. “I think we were so much better at treating each other kindly when we all had to know our neighbors and get along with them,” says Niwa. “I think some of those old-school techniques of networking, like looking people in the eye and sending handwritten thank you cards, these kinds of old ways have become so special these days and people really appreciate it.”

The best way to master networking is to not be shy.

Don’t be overbearing either, but if you’re having a good conversation with someone and there’s an opportunity to ask to keep in touch, go for it. That’s what business cards are for. Building a network of people benefits you and the people you meet because, in the end, we can all help each other branch out and find success. Don’t be shy, and remember practice makes perfect. YM

LIVING | 40

how to age gracefully WRITTEN BY KATRINA DIZON PHOTOGRAPHY BY MADISON GOLDBERG

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n the evening following my 21st birthday, I noticed fine lines forming under my eyes and my forehead. My heart dropped to my stomach as I faced an inevitable fear: aging. I immediately Googled “anti-aging products,” added hundreds of dollars worth of skincare into my Sephora cart, then came to several realizations. First of all, I had barely entered my twenties, and yet I was already picturing myself in a nursing home. Second of all, what’s wrong with wrinkles, and why, as a woman, did I become fearful of them?

There is a double standard when it comes to aging between men and women. For women, wrinkles and grey hair are taboo. Gaining weight is seen as “letting yourself go.” Meanwhile, men are described to have “salt and pepper” hair, and wrinkles are signs of maturity. Women are expected to appear young forever, while men are applauded for maturing. Why do we insist that women find the fountain of youth, while men are free to “age like fine wine?” The stigmatization of aging for women can have negative effects on their wellbeing and their wallets.

According to Statista, the global anti-aging market was estimated to be worth $50.2 billion in 2018 and is expected to reach a value of $79.5 billion by 2024. This includes cosmetic procedures like Botox, but a large part of this is anti-aging products; moisturizers, serums, and eye creams are marketed to reduce signs of aging. Women are targeted by large beauty corporations with buzzwords like “instant agerewind,” “age-defying,” “youth elixir,” etc. The “antiaging” section of Sephora alone has 248 products, with prices ranging from $7.50 to $350.

According to a study conducted by Amy Muise, a psychology professor at York University in Canada, women in their 50s are more likely to purchase antiaging products, but the effort to prevent signs of

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aging begin as young as 20 years old. In this study, many women found that looking good strongly correlated with looking younger. The study also found that though most women were skeptical of these products’ effectiveness, they use them nonetheless because they give women a sense of control over their appearance and allow them to embrace aging naturally.

Journalism major Annika Hom ‘20 feels the pressure of maintaining a youthful appearance as she enters her 20s. She says that her mother advises her to use a lot of moisturizer and sunscreen in order to keep her skin youthful. “I find myself thinking I’m really lucky to be 20 because this is probably the best that I’ll look, and I try to imagine what I’ll look like when I’m older. I feel like guys don’t usually think about that,” Hom says.

Many factors are linked to women’s apparent need to stay youthful: the rise of social media and its seemingly perfect realities, Hollywood’s portrayal of older women (or lack thereof), and highly retouched magazine covers.

Female celebrities are praised for appearing the same way they did when they were younger: Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie, and Cindy Crawford, to name a few.

These types of celebrities are usually the ones who remain relevant in Hollywood. Female celebrities who show signs of aging are either ridiculed for it, attempt to hide it through Botox or Photoshop, or lose their jobs because they are no longer deemed attractive. Katie Beaven, a professor of Gender in a Global Perspective, says the globalized standard of beauty gets younger and younger as time passes. “‘Woman’ is constructed with this idea of ideal femininity, and that ideal femininity is impossible to obtain, but we’re kind of conditioned into trying to achieve it. I think [ideal femininity] wants us to look eternally young, beautiful, have flawless complexions, no wrinkles, and a perfect body,” Beaven said. Meanwhile, male celebrities like Steve Carrell, George Clooney, and Leonardo DiCaprio are all celebrated for being “silver foxes,” having “dad bods,” and overall just aging well.

The irony is that stress over aging can lead to even more premature aging. Why fear the inevitable? Being youthful should not strongly correlate with beauty.

Though many women use anti-aging products and procedures to feel good about themselves, we must recognize the difference between self-love and feeling pressured by society to use such products. Age should no longer be a secret. Women can be silver foxes, too. YM LIVING | 42

E E S DIRECTED BY LILY WALSH DAYSIA TOLENTINO PHOTOGRAPHED BY LILY WALSH ASSISTED BY MONIKA DAVIS STYLED BY OLIVIA CIGLIANO LAUREN DILLOW TIANNA LOVERDE ERIN RENZI MAKEUP BY OLIVIA CIGLIANO LAUREN DILLOW MODELED BY AMAIA RIOSECO FRANCESCA POLISTINA 43 | YOURMAG

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Bi, Bi, Bi: The Rise of Bisexual Anthems B isexuality is often played up in the media with negative stereotypes, creating an illusion around the community that continues to damage them for decades. There’s the myth that you’ll eventually “grow out of it”, or the misconception that bisexual people are confused as to whether or not they’re really just gay or straight. Not to mention the false claim that if you are dating a bisexual, they’ll be more likely to cheat on you.

Ridiculed, shamed, and seemingly always a hot topic of debate, it’s only fair that the recent rise in bisexual anthems have come to save the day.

Bisexual anthems are celebrating the fact that bisexuality is real, not something that will fade with age or interest. There’s a sense of pride within the lyrics, reminding those listening that you don’t have to be ashamed of who you are, regardless of what end of the spectrum you fall on.

The trend of including people of all genders in songs has led to more inclusivity and deepened the conversation of what it means to be LGBTQ+ in some form or another. You don’t have to put a label on your sexuality and fit into a neat little category, which is the appeal to many.

Harry Styles, for example, has always been mysterious when it comes to his romantic life. He claimed in past interviews that he doesn’t feel the need to define his sexuality, though many proclaim his new single “Lights Up” as a coming out song, despite the fact he has not exactly confirmed it as such. Though the song dropping at midnight on National Coming Out Day might be a bit of a clue. Surrounded by men and women in the music video, Styles sings about, “stepping into the light,” and, “never going back.”

Styles’ fans glowed over the song and praised him for writing something that felt like it was theirs, lyrics that specifically applied to those struggling to come to terms with their sexuality.

That may be the best part about these bisexual anthems - not only are they giving the artists an outlet to sing about who they are, but they become a beacon of light to fans who have yet to be seen in this particular way before.

Not all songs about bisexuality are given the same

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treatment, though, and nor should they. Last year, Rita Ora came out with a song titled “Girls,” in which her, Charli XCX, and Bebe Rexa sing about their desire to (sometimes) kiss girls. However, the song was widley criticized for protraying bisexual women with negative sterotypes. The song included lyrics such as, “And last night, yeah, we got with a dude,” and “Red wine, I just wanna kiss girls, girls, girls”, reinforcing the sterotype that bisexual women are motivated by the attention of men. Or as the latter lyrics suggested, claiming she only wants to be with girls when she’s drunk.

Lauren Bjella, a sophomore at Emerson, recalls feeling upset at the song and how it portrayed her community. “It did much more harm than good.

It played into the idea that women are fetisizhed when in a queer relationship, and I personally felt really invalidated. When bisexual women are only protrayed as one way to the public, it can be super harmful.”

Bjella is not alone. Hayley Kiyoko and Kehlani, both members of the LGBTQ+ community, expressed their distaste for the song, claiming it was extremely harmful to the community. Hundreds of others online also voiced their disapproval over the lyrics. So much so, in fact, that Rita Ora was forced to apologize for the harm the song caused. While this may not fix the damages done, it certainly sent a message about how songs handling the topic of bisexuality must be treated in the future.

On a much smaller scale, up and coming singer Clairo came out as bisexual last year, and her recent album Immunity shows her singing about different genders, specfically about women in “Sofia” and “Bags.”

While these songs are not as outwardly anthems as, say, “Bad at Love” by Halsey, having an out, young bisexual girl writing lyrics that can relate to the commuinity is increasingly important, and something that should continue to be encouraged in pop culture.

As we continue to encourage love and acceptance in all forms, we cannot leave the bisexual commuinity behind. They deserve their own little sliver of music that celebrates who they are, and with household names like Harry Styles creating these powerful anthems, it’s safe to say they’re not going anywhere anytime soon. YM

WRITTEN BY MOLLY GOODRICH ART BY ELIZABETH APPLE

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the fearless dermott Kennedy WRITTEN BY NENA HALL ART BY MADELYN MULREANY

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H

e started his career busking in major cities like Dublin and Boston. Many compare him to Ed Sheeran, though he lacks the English accent.

Dermot Kennedy has come a long way from singing on Grafton Street. The 27-year-old rising star from Rathcoole, Ireland is now selling out venues on both sides of the pond.

Kennedy’s passion for music began early; he started playing the guitar at age 10 and started writing songs at age 14. His first performances were in the streets singing covers of other artists like Sam Smith, Kanye West, and Glen Hansard. Shortly after, Kennedy’s father brought him to open mic nights in Dublin to perform in bars that Kennedy was too young to get into. He was one of the first new artists to really take advantage of Spotify when it initially launched, further jumpstarting his career.

Kennedy released multiple singles ranking in the UK Top 10, including his two most-listened-to songs on Spotify, “Power Over Me” and “Outnumbered.” While releasing these songs, Kennedy was also working on his debut album Without Fear, released in October 2019.

Many of Kennedy’s fans discovered him by listening to his top hits on the radio and hearing a song of his pop up on their Spotify shuffle.

“What I really like about him is he is completely unique. There is definitely no one else who sounds like him… and he just stays true to who he is with his music,” says 23-year-old fan Alexandra Charnigo, a Pennsylvania native who saw Kennedy in concert on October 24th in Philadelphia. She runs an Instagram fan account dedicated to Kennedy and even knitted a sweater for him, which she gave to him at the concert.

Miami resident, Samantha Patino, says her favorite song on the 13-track debut album is “Lost” because of how relatable Kennedy is in the piece, and that it will always hold a special place in her heart. An opening lyric that resonates with her is, “When everything was broken / The devil hit his second stride.” It made her feel

like she finally had the words to explain her experience of going through breakup after breakup. “[‘Lost’] came out during a time when I was going through something really hard, and it kind of explained exactly how I was feeling. It gave me a hope to get out of that time,” Patino said.

Kennedy doesn’t write his songs in a selfish way but instead does so in broad aspects, which allows his audience to experience the same feelings of love and loss he does.

“You feel understood by him; he really is great at portraying emotions and feelings. He’s so relatable to everyone and I love that,” Charnigo said. She mentioned how Kennedy’s song “After Rain” is a perfect example of that and it’s been the song she always goes to when she’s feeling down.

Kennedy makes his audience care and immediately grabs their attention from the beginning of his songs.

His style is unique compared to other artists in the music industry in that he walks a fine line between both acoustic and hip hop.

“I like the sound of a lot of his music. I like how heavy it is,” said Madison Mccormack, a freshman at Champlain College. Mccormack added she likes how complex his music is, and that it is both sad but also “really aggressive” in some ways.

The budding Irish singer has been hurtling full speed at this newfound stardom, and his popularity has continued to grow since the start of his current tour.

He has this way of resonating with people and making them feel understood. Each of his songs is so different from the one before, and they’re so versatile that they connect with so many people.

Kennedy’s rise in popularity caused many of his current shows to sell out, including his concert at the House of Blues in Boston on October 23. He posted on Instagram after the Boston show about how beautiful it was to be in this city again, and from a fan’s standpoint, you can see him come full circle as an artist. YM

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The Birds, the Bees, and What’s That Feeling Between My Knees?

WRITTEN BY LAURA PHILIPS

ART BY GABRIELA PORTUGAL

O

ne night in eighth grade, I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, pulled down my “days of the week” underwear, and saw the most horrid thing: I was bleeding. From there. Not wanting to wake my mom up, I thought back to the weirdly detailed images in the American Girl Care and Keeping of You book of the girl putting in a tampon. Too scary and too soon, I thought. So I took one of my sister’s pads, learned what wings were, and went back to bed pretty uncomfortable. Flash forward only five years later to me in my dorm room, watching a cartoon tampon sing to the Big Mouth character Jessi about periods and absolutely loving it.

It’s hard to believe that puberty is such a short time in our lives as a whole, but it’s a time when it feels like everything is changing and there’s nothing you can do about it. At the time, it’s all so serious. Having your first kiss, getting your braces adjusted on a monthly basis, your insides caving in on themselves only to completely rewire with different hormones...the usual. For a long time, it was so easy to look back on my own puberty and just cringe real hard. But when I saw the Netflix show Big Mouth, it became easier to just look back at it and laugh. And laugh really hard, too.

Big Mouth, along with Hulu’s Pen15, headline a whole new genre of TV: puberty-focused television. Big Mouth is an animated show created by comedian Nick Kroll and his childhood best friend Andrew Goldberg.

It chronicles the sexual/hormonal awakenings of an ensemble of middle schoolers while also dealing with storylines about more emotional parts of puberty:

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depression, divorcing parents, and shitty friend drama.

Pen15 was created by Maya Erskine, and she stars in the show with Anna Konkle. The catch? They’re their 30-year-old selves playing out their middle school experience in the year 2000, making for a more hilarious yet self-aware, without grossly sexualizing the depiction of actual children. Linda Shewokis ‘22 says, “For Pen15, I love that the creators are able to create comedy without sacrificing the heart. Middle school is an extremely sensitive time for young girls where a lot of things in life just plain suck. Sometimes it wasn’t even funny when Maya and Anna were dealing with a lot of real and serious topics and situations. It was a real look as what it is like to grow up and it hit home for me.” These shows have gained their popularity by using comedy, crassness, and the true sensitive spirit of the middle schooler to ultimately spread a message ending the stigma of “going through changes.”

While the shows depict and delve into the struggles of middle schoolers, that age group is not their intended audience. These shows provide the opportunity for our generation and older generations to look back at puberty and laugh instead of cringe, knowing everything (mostly) turned out okay. In addition to providing laughs, they very much provide a healthy and educational viewpoint on different aspects of sex, mental health, and growing up.

In middle and high school, I barely had any sex education. Luckily the Internet existed, but that was scary sometimes, and I felt like everything I was learning about sex was some half-true story from friends in the

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grades above me. Watching both these shows definitely helped me normalize things like female masturbation, and even the depression I went through in middle school that I had subconsciously invalidated because I knew I was young. Grace Gamester ‘23 says, “I’m a strong proponent of sex education and I think Big Mouth tries to do some sex education along with their comedy, which is pretty effective. Even though young kids shouldn’t be watching the show, teens certainly are, and those in places with poor sex education can learn a little bit from the shows.” Big Mouth even features an episode in season 2 about Planned Parenthood, providing real information about the services that they provide.

Maia Tivony ‘22 says, “I remember feeling so silly for having learned more about women’s reproductive rights and contraceptives through Big Mouth than I did in my high school health class, but honestly, I’m not ashamed. I remember the information because of the way it was presented!”

With the ongoing rise and triumph of streaming services over network TV, shows like Big Mouth and Pen15 have the right platform to be able to thrive.

While both Hulu and Netflix started as a platform that

you could just watch your old favorite shows on, they now have loads of original content coming from their own production companies, and both these shows are children of that. Ten years ago, shows like this wouldn’t have been able to exist considering the censorship and guidelines of network television. These shows are great because they exist in all their graphic glory, but they are only able to do that because of the streaming services they are on. Big Mouth, with its animation format, goes as far as to show the character’s genitals, singing tampons, and a multitude of naked bodies as part of an epic musical number about body positivity. I am very appreciative that these platforms have given the “okay” to creators to talk about these topics that are too taboo for network TV, and streaming services tend to reach a wider audience nowadays.

Puberty happened. It’s over. Even as we grow and learn through college and adult life, it’s important to remember that not everything that sucks is going to suck forever. But what shows like Big Mouth and Pen15 show us is that as much as it won’t suck forever, it can really really suck at the moment, and it’s okay to feel all those feelings in all their royal sucky glory. YM

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T

he premise of The Polar Express (2004), that a young boy cannot hear the chime of a bell because he refuses to believe in the mystery of Santa Claus, never seemed too peculiar. It was the reaction of those around me that sparked my interest.

My mother never left a viewing of the movie without bursting into tears. My older cousins followed suit, looking at me with a knowing smile when the man in red revealed himself to be real. I may have been confused, but I was perceptive enough to recognize that there was something left unsaid, a secret code communicated within the script. When the Tom Hanks-looking Saint Nicholas held up the bell and promised, “the magic of Christmas lies in your heart,” I applauded. Believing seemed as simple as that.

Christmas movies have become an inescapable phenomenon, particularly due to cable television events. Hallmark churns out holiday-themed films by the dozens beginning on Oct. 25. Freeform is notorious for their 25 Days of Christmas countdown.

The popularity of seasonal movies for the family is nothing new. For Hanna Marchessault ‘22, who remembers learning the truth about Santa Claus when she was roughly 9, watching classic Christmas movies was always a form of holiday comfort--and confusion.

“I always remember being little and really questioning the idea of Santa, especially in movies like The Santa Clause.” This film centers around a divorced father who mocks the idea of Santa until the man himself falls from the roof of his home and he must personally take up the task of bringing presents to children.

This is a common trope among children’s Christmas movies: a doubtful mom or dad, hardened by adulthood, learns to accept the spirit of the season when Santa proves himself to be magic. Typically, “believing” is what saves the day. Elf (2003) follows this algorithm perfectly. When an abnormally humanlooking worker from the North Pole arrives in New

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York City, he meets a young woman who doesn’t believe his origin story. He spends the rest of the movie trying to prove to her and to his younger brother that Santa is, in fact, real. It is only when all of the disbelievers begin to change their minds that Santa regains his ability to fly his sleigh.

As filmmakers seemingly intend, some children do not pick up the hints to adult audiences. “I was rewatching How the Grinch Stole Christmas and thinking ‘Wow this plot is actually super deep.’ As a child, I was just amazed by the colors, the music, and Max the Dog,” Soleil Easton ‘22 says.

Molly Goodrich ‘22 agrees. “I never really picked up on the implications that Santa wasn’t real in any of the media I consumed as a kid. I think I was too preoccupied with decorating and making wish-lists. The beliefs of anyone else (even fictional characters) didn’t sway my opinion,” she says.

Despite some situational naiveté, the threat of spoiling perhaps the largest collective international lie is posed upon parents every year when they decide to turn on the television and allow their children to take in Christmas content. Common Sense Media, one of the largest entertainment vetting websites for parents, even has its own barometer for Santa sensitivity, a compilation of “secret spoiling” books and films entitled, Santa Spoiler Alerts!

While most of these films end with an ultimate acceptance of Santa’s existence, the plight that leads to this conclusion is not lost on all children. In an age where so much information is at our fingertips, it almost feels impossible that this upcoming generation’s parents will be able to maintain the charade of Santa Claus.

By the time that I had the dreaded conversation with my family, I was 9 years old. I still find a great sense of comfort in The Polar Express, even if I now know that elves don’t operate in choreographed dance numbers, or at all. Maybe it really does come down to the magic of Christmas that persists within me. YM

The Magic of Christmas Lies

WRITTEN BY JOY FREEMAN

ART BY TATIANA GUEL

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YM CLASS OF 202

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0

GINA YORK TITLE: STYLE DIRECTOR MAJOR: VISUAL MEDIA ARTS “

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MONIKA DAVIS TITLE: MANAGING EDITOR MAJOR: JOURNALISM “

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DAYSIA TOLENTINO TITLE: EDITOR-IN-CHIEF MAJOR: JOURNALISM “

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YOUR THINGS ART BY ENNE GOLDSTEIN

WITH EDITOR-IN-CHIEF DAYSIA TOLENTINO NECKLACES

MAGAZINES

I wear these two necklaces every day. My dad gave me my

If you’ve ever been to my apartment or seen my bedroom, you

nameplate necklace when I was a toddler, and I stopped wearing

probably think I have a problem. I’ll be the first to admit that

it for awhile when the clasp broke. I eventually got it fixed and

I have way too many magazines. That doesn’t mean I’ll stop

I’ve been wearing it nonstop ever since. The heart charm is from

buying them! I think there’s something about printed media that

my mom and I wear it with my nameplate. I wear them together

is incomparable. Scrolling through articles and pictures online

so I have a little piece of both of my parents wherever I go. The

doesn’t feel the same as holding those words and images in your

crystal I wear every day is a black tourmaline. It’s supposed to help

hand. I love feeling and comparing the different paper weights

me transcend negative energy and find the strength to confront

and finishes. I like thinking about how different elements take

my biggest anxieties. I bought it during a particularly stressful

up space on a page. Kinda nerdy, I know. But really, think about

semester and I’ve kept it around my neck almost every day since

how it feels reading this issue online versus in print. There’s a

then.

difference

DENIM JACKETS

PASTA JARS

Denim jackets have been a wardrobe staple of mine since high

When I moved off campus (and subsequently, away from the dining

school. I’ve cycled through quite a few since then and I always

hall), I started eating a lot of pasta. My roommates and I would finish

choose ones with interesting details. They’re fashionable (denim

a jar of sauce and instead of tossing the empty containers, we’d use

goes with everything, including more denim) and functional (so

them for other things. I use them for extra storage, as water bottles, to

many pockets!). I have several denim jackets now, but my current

make overnight oats, and so much more. It’s like a two-for-one deal

favorites are a fitted Carhartt piece with a corduroy collar and an

when you buy pasta sauce!

oversized Garment District-find with red contrast stitching.

BRWNGRLZ EARRINGS SOAP AND GLORY PILLOW PLUMP GLOSS

An avid Bon Appétit watcher and fan of the Test Kitchen, I I love

I thought about including a lot of different makeup products for this last

BRWNGRLZ! It’s a brand created by brown girls, for brown girls.

slot, but there’s really one that I would consider a must-have (besides my

The founder is a Filipinx woman who makes the most beautiful

eyebrow products, but that’s boring). This gloss is everything. The shade

and intricate engraved acrylic earrings. She has two collections

Nude in Town is the perfect MLBB (My Lips But Better) for me and it

named RECLAMATION and RISE that incorporate Filipinx

adds a beautiful, juicy shine to my lips. Even on my most natural days,

iconography and I have a few pairs from those lines. Wearing

I’ll add this gloss to my look just to elevate it a bit. It has a plumping

these earrings makes me feel so empowered as a Filipinx woman; I

effect that might not be for everyone, so be careful before using!

always feel like they add a little something extra to my look!

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Y.MP3 SONGS FOR YOUR HOLIDAY PARTAYYY ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU BY MARIAH CAREY SANTA TELL ME BY ARIANA GRANDE HOT CHOCOLATE BY TYLER, THE CREATOR & JERRY PAPER MISTLETOE BY JUSTIN BIEBER HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS BY MICHAEL BUBLÉ MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HOLIDAYS BY *NSYNC 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS BY RELIENT K LAST CHRISTMAS BY WHAM! KISS ME AT MIDNIGHT BY *NSYNC HAPPY CHRISTMAS (WAR IS OVER) BY MAROON 5 I WON’T BE HOME FOR CHANUKAH BY TEAMMATE SEASONS OF LOVE BY 98 DEGREES CHRISTMAS WITHOUT YOU BY DNCE THAT TIME BY MNDSGN FATHER CHRISTMAS BY THE KINKS SNOWED IN BY MNDSGN GOYIM FRIENDS BY THE LEEVEES HAPPY XMAS BY JOHN LENNON 67 | YOURMAG

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ARTIST STATEMENT: KATE GONDWE

How did you get into photography?

My entire life has revolved around the visual arts. I wouldn’t consider myself a photographer because I know so little about photography but I’m glad it entered my life. I started taking photos in 2015 during the set of my first documentary. I was going back to Malawi, Africa with my family and I wanted to document everything and everyone. I look back at those photos and I can see that that was the start. I have always and will always focus more on filmmaking, but photography goes hand and hand with it… I definitely suffer from imposter syndrome so whenever someone actually will talk to me about a photo or a shoot I’m always excited. I admire so many Emerson students and their drive to go out and shoot whether it be a film, music video, editorial or fun photoshoot. I owe a lot of my recent creative drive via photography to Index Magazine, Em Magazine, my friends and so many other organizations I’ve taken part in.

Who inspires you as a photographer?

My friends are all so talented and I think we push each other to get better. When it comes to creating concepts, my inspiration usually comes from emotion or feeling a film has given me, and then I go to photographers. I really like to pair photographers with film directors. For example, a film director like Chantal Akerman would go so well with photographer Vivian Maier. A photo series like “Girl Culture” by Lauren Greenfield would be a perfect pairing with Sofia Coppola… I really love Andrea Arnold – she has this humanistic approach to her films that I’m currently trying to obtain in a photo series and thesis film. Also, the Instagram explore page saves lives. I’m constantly saving or following up-andcoming artists.

Can you describe your style?

I think I’m still trying to find it. I steal then recreate a lot of ideas from filmmakers and photographers. I’m at the point of my journey where I know what I like and what I don’t, I just need to find my own vision. I like seeing movement/choreography in photography – I think it’s beautiful and I’d love to master that. My background in dance and film directing helps me further direct my subjects and I hope to progress in that.

What does your art mean to you?

We can all agree that art is a personal entity. For me, my work represents everything that’s going on in my head, from my current inspirations to events that take place in my life. Art is a way for the world to see me and my progression.

What project are you currently working on?

I’m in the works of writing my thesis film which I’m super excited about, and I hope this film will enter me into feature narrative drama. I plan to make or write shorts in between, and I believe I have another music video coming up. As for photography, my next project is whatever comes to my mind next. I don’t like to take it too seriously, I find my work is better when it naturally happens.

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