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You Have Your Hands Full
Jacob Mansbach (left) and Dario de Albergaria are setting a terrific example and making their summer really count this year. Congratulations, guys, go get ‘em.
by Mara Peters Former editor for the fashion/lifestyle section of the New York
Post, Mara moved to London and worked as a contributing editor for the Daily Mail’s You Magazine, freelancing for Look Magazine, NY Post and the Style Magazine for The Sunday Times. To remain sane during diaper years she writes a mommy blog, You Have Your Hands Full – www.handsfullsb.com.
An (Empathetic) Butterfly Effect
“I
t’s empathy,” she said with a very definite tone. She should know. My mom has interviewed thousands of underprivileged teenagers to select the ones she thinks would most likely succeed in her nonprofit program, Summer Search. I had asked her what characteristics were the most important as she looked for teens who’d beat the odds and make it “out” of their difficult circumstances to complete college. She placed empathy higher than great grades, a competitive drive and participation in sports. “It was the personal stories I heard like the kid that saved and protected his sister from a schizophrenic mom. As I listened to him relate his story, I knew there was hope. The ones who can understand someone else’s problem, see something needs to be done, and act on it – those are the kids that are going to succeed and lead.” I had asked her because I’ve been looking for answers, for the right formula to help raise my brood. As I listened to my mom, I thought about the four Alpha and I are responsible for and wondered whether we are nurturing empathy. There’s no doubt we are privileged, even entitled. My kids live in a safe, happy bubble where all their needs are met and everything is taken care of. They’re chauffeured around
town to sports events and music classes while listening to tunes on their iPods. They have amazing summers at the beach; vacations running free on a farm. Their lives are good, a far cry from the kids my mom works with who live on the edge. And I’m concerned that my own can’t see themselves in those that are struggling. Because they don’t struggle themselves.
Kids Feed the Hungry That is why local kids Jacob Mansbach and Dario de Albergaria fascinate me. They are competing in the Carpinteria Triathlon to raise $10,000 for the Foodbank of Santa Barbara County. Last summer, Jacob’s mom and I sat at Los Banos pool watching our kids swim laps. She told me somehow she’d love to incorporate community service into Jacob’s summer, and had decided to take him to the Santa Barbara Foodbank. Soon, I received an email that Jacob was going to channel his passion for triathlons into fundraising for the Foodbank. By the end of the summer, Jacob had completed the Santa Barbara Triathlon and raised $4,636. Not bad for an eight year old. I watched Jacob speak to his school about his experience of doing something bigger than himself. At the time, he
was a third grader at Roosevelt. At the assembly his confident demeanor and encouragement reminded me about what my own mother has said all along. Those kids that combine empathy and action are the ones that will be our future leaders. And although the Foodbank benefited from Jacob’s efforts, the experience also changed Jacob in a very profound way. His commitment and enthusiasm are contagious. This year he upped the ante and enlisted his good friend Dario to join forces, in hopes of more than doubling last year’s efforts. The seed of visiting the Foodbank has taken hold and an amazing tree has sprouted.
As parents, I wonder if we shouldn’t be asking more of our kids. If the goal is to create thriving, amazing people, ready for the world, why are we not teaching empathy and action? What if we asked our children to combine their personal interests with a greater purpose? Wouldn’t that show them that every act that they do can actually be meaningful, bigger and impactful? They could realize they’d be the pebble that starts a ripple effect that will benefit their loved ones, their friends and their community. It all starts with one empathic child. Just look at Jacob. And now Dario. No doubt, the ripple is just starting.
Peters’ Pick
T
he Foodbank of Santa Barbara County provides nourishment to those in need by distributing acquired and donated food through local agencies. With two warehouse locations, one in Santa Barbara and one in Santa Maria, the Foodbank distributed more than 8.5 million meals in 2012. Hunger is a very real issue in Santa Barbara County and over 44% of the people served by the Foodbank are under the age of 18. In addition to providing nutrition, the Foodbank offers several educational programs targeting hunger solutions and nutrition problems in Santa Barbara County. Foodbank’s success is driven by the support of community members, businesses and corporations. To learn more about Dario and Jake for the Foodbank, and to make a donation to help them meet their goal of raising $10,000, go to www.foodbanksbc.org/ DarioAndJake4theFoodbank.html
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