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SCARED STRAIGHT: COULD TIME IN PRISON REALLY MAKE TWANDA CARLISLE A BETTER CITY COUNCILOR? 06

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EVENTS 4.1 & 4.4 BUNCHER FAMILY FREE DAYS The Jack Buncher Foundation is sponsoring three days of museum admission during Pittsburgh Public Schools’ Spring Break week. Presented in conjunction with “The Year of the Family”. FREE museum admission

4.4 – 10am HALF PINT PRINTS Education Studio A monthly silkscreen printing activity for families with children ages 1 to 4 years old. Free with museum admission

4.10 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: ROB MAZUREK AND BLACK CUBE SP Warhol theater Tickets $15 / $12 Members & students

4.11 – 2pm EXPOSURES: MEET THE ARTISTS The Warhol Store Casual talk with the Exposures artists Cecilia Ebitz, Cassie Griffin, Worker Bird and Ron Copeland. FREE

An Evening with 4.18 – 2pm CORITA KENT IN HER CONTEXTS: ART, CRAFT, POLITICS, AND SOCIETY Warhol theater FREE with museum admission

Madeleine Peyroux 4.23 – 8pm Carnegie Lecture Hall (Oakland) | Co-presented with WYEP Tickets $35 / $30 Members & students | visit www.warhol.org or call 412.237.8300

The Warhol welcomes singer/songwriter Madeleine Peyroux to the Carnegie Lecture Hall. Beginning almost 20 years ago with her critically acclaimed debut album Dreamland, Peyroux’s work continues to exist uniquely and comfortably at the intersection of jazz, pop, and blues. The program presents a musical anthology of Peyroux’s nearly 20-year career. NEWS

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The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015


04.01/04.08.2015 VOLUME 25 + ISSUE 13

Animal Rescue League

{EDITORIAL}

15th Annual

Editor CHARLIE DEITCH Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Music Editor MARGARET WELSH Associate Editor AL HOFF Multimedia Editor ASHLEY MURRAY Listings Editor CELINE ROBERTS Assistant Listings Editor ALEX GORDON Staff Writers REBECCA NUTTALL, ALEX ZIMMERMAN Staff Photographer HEATHER MULL Interns SHAWN COOKE, ZACCHIAUS MCKEE

Wildlife Baby Shower Fundraiser

DROP OFF LOCATION: Waterfront Old Abercrombie Site

{ART}

{COVER PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Production Director JULIE SKIDMORE Art Director LISA CUNNINGHAM Graphic Designers JEFF SCHRECKENGOST, JENNIFER TRIVELLI

Wildlife Center 6000 Verona Rd, Verona, PA 15147 WWW.ANIMALRESCUE.ORG 412.345.7300, EXT. 500

April 11, 2015 12 pm - 4 pm

{ADVERTISING}

[MAIN FEATURE] task at hand has always been 16 to“The win a World Series ring.” — Pirates infielder Pedro Alvarez in City Paper’s 2015 Pirates Preview

[NEWS] believe in redemption and I want to 06 “Iknow, do the voters believe in it too?” —Twanda Carlisle on running again for Pittsburgh City Council despite a public-corruption conviction

Director of Advertising JESSIE AUMAN-BROCK Senior Account Executives TOM FAULS, PAUL KLATZKIN, SANDI MARTIN, JEREMY WITHERELL Advertising Representatives DRA ANDERSON, MATT HAHN, JEFF HRAPLA, SCOTT KLATZKIN, MELISSA LENIGAN, ERICA MATAYA, DANA MCHENRY, MELISSA METZ Classified Manager ANDREA JAMES Radio Sales Manager CHRIS KOHAN National Advertising Representative VMG ADVERTISING 1.888.278.9866 OR 1.212.475.2529

{MARKETING+PROMOTIONS}

[TASTE]

Pisco Sour is a great warm-weather 27 “The cocktail that showcases the power of eggs.” — Drew Cranisky on adding eggs to cocktails

[MUSIC] all starts to blend together, then it 30 “Ifjustitbecomes confusing.” — Reba Meyers, of Adventures and Code Orange, on keeping those bands separate

[SCREEN]

urgency of Kumiko’s quixotic quest 38 “The underscores the sadness and desperation fueling her delusion.” — Al Hoff reviews the film Kumiko, the Treasure Hunter

Marketing Director DEANNA KRYMOWSKI Marketing Design Coordinator LINDSEY THOMPSON Advertising and Promotions Coordinator ASHLEY WALTER Radio Promotions Director VICKI CAPOCCIONI-WOLFE Radio Promotions Assistants ANDREW BILINSKY, NOAH FLEMING

{ADMINISTRATION} Business Manager LAURA ANTONIO Circulation Director JIM LAVRINC Office Administrator RODNEY REGAN Technical Director PAUL CARROLL Interactive Media Manager CARLO LEO

{PUBLISHER} STEEL CITY MEDIA

[ARTS] original meanings are subverted 41 “The to serve her aesthetic goals as well as to deliver her humanist messages.” — Nadine Wasserman on the text appropriations of artist Corita Kent

[LAST PAGE] a starting bid of just $2,500, you 63 “With can get your hands on Brian McNamee’s hypodermic needle containing steroids and the DNA of Roger Clemens.” — Charlie Deitch on the world’s worst sports memorabilia auctions

{REGULAR & SPECIAL FEATURES} NEWS QUIRKS BY ROLAND SWEET 14 EVENTS LISTINGS 46 SAVAGE LOVE BY DAN SAVAGE 55 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY BY ROB BREZSNY 56 CROSSWORD BY BRENDAN EMMETT QUIGLEY 59 NEWS

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GENERAL POLICIES: Contents copyrighted 2015 by Steel City Media. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission of the publisher. The opinions expressed in Pittsburgh City Paper are those of the author and not necessarily of Steel City Media. LETTER POLICY: Letters, faxes or e-mails must be signed and include town and daytime phone number for confirmation. We may edit for length and clarity. DISTRIBUTION: Pittsburgh City Paper is published weekly by Steel City Media and is available free of charge at select distribution locations. One copy per reader; copies of past issues may be purchased for $3.00 each, payable in advance to Pittsburgh City Paper. FIRST CLASS MAIL SUBSCRIPTIONS: Available for $175 per year, $95 per half year. No refunds. PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 650 Smithfield Street, Suite 2200 Pittsburgh, PA 15222 412.316.3342 FAX: 412.316.3388 E-MAIL info@pghcitypaper.com www.pghcitypaper.com

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THIS WEEK

ONLINE

“I BELIEVE IN REDEMPTION. I WANT TO KNOW, DO THE VOTERS BELIEVE IN IT TOO?”

www.pghcitypaper.com

We take a look back at the former Pittsburgh City Councilor’s 2007 conviction on public-corruption charges. A news feature on Twanda Carlisle’s current run for council appears at right.

See our photo slideshow of Pirates spring training. Our full preview of the 2015 season begins on page 16. www.pghcitypaper.com

Listen to the #CPWeekend podcast, which goes live every Thursday at www.pghcitypaper.com.

CITY PAPER

INTERACTIVE Get enhanced events listings and high-quality video, audio and photos on CP’s NEW mobile site for iPhone, Android or tablet devices. citypapermobile.com Tag your photos #CPReaderArt, and we’ll regram and print the best submissions from @pghcitypaper. See one from instagrammer @photo.id on page 8. Download our free app for a chance to win tickets to see Aretha Franklin at Heinz Hall. Contest ends April 2, 2015. 6

“WHEN I FELL DOWN, I FELL HARD” {PHOTO BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Twanda Carlisle on the campaign trail in 2007, while under indictment

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HEN LIFE-LONG Homewood resident Victoria Young thinks of former Pittsburgh City Councilor Twanda Carlisle, she fondly remembers the time they spent singing in the church choir together. “Her and her mom are wonderful people,” Young says today. “She’s such a wonderful person.” It bothers Young little that her former elected representative was convicted of misappropriating public funds for personal use during her time in office. But Carlisle’s checkered history certainly won’t stop Young from voting to return her to council in the May 19 primary. “She was doing wonderful when she was on [council] before,” says Young. “She’s been someone who listens and cares about what the community wants.” Young’s opinion of Carlisle is not as uncommon throughout District 9 as one might think, especially in Homewood and the East Hills where 56-year-old Carlisle has lived most of her life. On this side of town, bonds formed in church and be-

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

tween families over generations are hard to break. But are they enough to earn Carlisle the necessary votes to return to council? And if she does win, will she even be legally eligible to serve? “I’ll vote for her,” Young says. “And I’m hoping and praying that when she gets on [council] this time, she doesn’t mess it up.”

Despite conviction, prison, Twanda Carlisle wants another shot at public service {BY REBECCA NUTTALL} The primary will pit Carlisle against incumbent District 9 Councilor Rev. Ricky Burgess, entrepreneur Andre Young and community-development organizer Judith Ginyard. But for Carlisle, the election will be about more than overcoming her opponents; she’ll have to face her own demons and win back the public’s trust. “I want to be the representative that I was before, who made sure the voice of the community was heard,” says Carlisle. “It’s

time for me to be given an opportunity to show the community I’ve paid for my mistake and I’m better than I was before and I’d never make the same mistake twice.” Carlisle served on council from 2002 to 2007 before resigning while under indictment on charges of theft and criminal conspiracy. In November 2007, she pled no contest to and was convicted of diverting $42,000 in public money for personal use. In February 2008, she was sentenced to one to two years in a state prison. She was released from prison into a halfway house in December, and was placed on parole the following March. (More on Carlisle’s conviction can be found online at www.pghcitypaper.com.) Eight years later, Carlisle, who has been working for the Pittsburgh branch of the NAACP, where her mother is president, says her ordeal was a learning experience and that she wants another shot at public service. “I was doing very well on Pittsburgh City Council — loved by most, not all — and I fell down,” Carlisle says. “And when I fell CONTINUES ON PG. 08


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“WHEN I FELL DOWN,” CONTINUED FROM PG. 06

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down, I fell hard because it was a public fall get a job and somebody tells you, ‘You can’t and not only did I fall, but it hurt my family. do that job,’ well, you served your time and I’m still trying to get back up, and every day you should be able to get that job now. PeoI look in the mirror and say, ‘Do better than ple should be able to do what they love to you did yesterday.’” do, if they know how to do it well.” Carlisle spoke to City Paper recently Carlisle says she is running to represent about her past service, her legal troubles all of the district’s constituents — even and her decision to run again for council. those who might not have a voice because But when she talks about that time, she of their pasts. doesn’t use those actual phrases. For ex“I don’t mind talking to the young men ample, she refers to her conviction as “fall- with their pants hanging down to get their ing down.” She calls her prison sentence perspective because that’s somebody’s “time away.” child. We have to start changing how we But that doesn’t mean she’s running perceive our community and being scared away from that part of her past. In fact, in our community. These are our kids,” these experiences, she says, have given Carlisle explains. “When I went away, I her the ability to relate to her constituents saw people who don’t really need to be on a different level. District 9, which en- there; they need help.” compasses Homewood, Garfield, Larimer, While her history might be hard to Lincoln Lemington-Belmar, Point Breeze, live down, Carlisle says people should reFriendship, East Hills and parts of East member her work on council to fund Liberty, has some of the highest community programs in her disrates of poverty and unemploytrict and secure contracts for ment in the city. African-American developers. Take a k at “I’ve been through the And this time around, Carllook bac sle’s Carli a fire and know what it feels d isle says, she would be more n a Tw l history like to be burned and be hot. committed than ever to crimina ghcity I say with all due respect to transparency on city council at www.p om paper.c the entire community, someand in her personal life. times you have to feel what There are many constitupeople are feeling,” Carlisle says. ents without personal ties to Car“Right now I can tell you what it feels lisle who remember her for the posilike to owe everybody. tive aspects of her tenure on council. As CP “Anytime you pick up the telephone, informally canvassed Pittsburgh’s eastern there’s a bill collector on the telephone and neighborhoods last week, it’s obvious she you’ve got to try to make payments. You’re still has her supporters. robbing Peter to pay Paul.” “She was good before,” says James Perry, And Carlisle can also relate to constitu- owner of Perry’s Honeydipper grocery store. ents who are passed over for employment “She always cared about what the commubecause of their criminal history. Since nity wanted. I’m going to vote for her.” she announced her candidacy, her abilWhether Carlisle has enough supporters ity as a convicted felon to legally serve on to win an election is another matter. After city council has been called into question, all, she has lost an election to incumbent though none of her opponents challenged Burgess before. After she was indicted in her election petitions. 2007, she lost the May primary to Burgess, While nothing in state law bars a who nabbed 50 percent of the vote. felon from running for elected office, Carlisle says the result of that election they are prohibited from serving. After does not reflect her record on council. they are elected, their position can be Instead, she claims, voters were swayed by challenged in the courts. But the official media coverage of her indictment. is not automatically blocked from serv“In fact, on the day of the election, the ing, and a challenge cannot be made until media showed me going to the magistrate the official takes office. and a lot of my senior citizens said they If elected, Carlisle says, she’ll take the thought I was being taken to jail right fight to retain her seat to court. And she then,” says Carlisle. “It was the day of the says similar battles elsewhere have seen election, how it was portrayed on TV, that elected officials serve out their terms before swayed a lot of people.” courts were able to reach a decision. For While there was a lot of media coverage example, in Montgomery County, Pa., of Carlisle’s legal problems, it’s still a pretty Conshohocken Borough Councilor Pete good bet that it was the actual allegations of Cianci served a full four-year term despite misusing public money that turned voters a 1993 conviction for drug possession. against her. A former aide of Carlisle’s tes“It’s not just about me, it’s about all of tified that she was hired in exchange for us,” says Carlisle. “Anybody who’s had a giving Carlisle a portion of her salary. Other problem with the law and you’re trying to charges included paying consultants for CONTINUES ON PG. 10


PITTSBURGH’S

GRAND

OPENING APRIL 9 th -11 th

TEXT ROCKS TO 31996 FOR A SPECIAL INVITE! 125 7TH ST. DOWNTOWN PITTSBURGH NEWS

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“WHEN I FELL DOWN,” CONTINUED FROM PG. 08

Animal Rescue League 15th Annual

Wildlife Baby Shower Fundraiser

April 11, 2015 12 pm - 4 pm

DROP OFF LOCATION: Verona AE Noble & Associates, Inc. 6149 Saltsburg Road

Wildlife Center 6000 Verona Rd, Verona, PA 15147 WWW.ANIMALRESCUE.ORG 412.345.7300, EXT. 500

work on a suspicious health study and buying items like trips to Las Vegas, fur coats and TVs. At this point, Burgess has completed nearly two terms on council, and plenty in the district are happy with his work. “Rev. Burgess has done a lot for our community,” says Stanley Dennison, senior pastor of Homewood AME Zion Church, where Carlisle is a parishioner. When asked if Carlisle should serve on council again, he adds, “I believe everyone deserves a second chance, but not necessarily in this instance.” Carlisle takes comments like this from her critics personally. “For the ones who say I don’t deserve a second chance, I say everybody makes mistakes,” says Carlisle. “If they’re looking in the mirror, they’ve made some. I’m somebody’s daughter; I’m somebody’s sister, aunt. I could be their family. And you don’t think they deserve a second chance in this lifetime? That’s a sad statement to make.” But under the circumstances, says University of Pittsburgh political communications professor Jerry Shuster, it’s easy to see where constituents are coming from. “Obviously, given what she is alleged to have done, that in itself would make

distrust almost automatic,” he says. “As a candidate, it’s difficult under any circumstances to overcome issues in your background that clearly challenge the honesty and integrity and ethics of the candidate.” The difficulty, says Shuster, comes from the integrity deficit many politicians already face. Political scandal and corruption are all too common and have left many voters highly distrustful of elected officials. And in this case, Carlisle misappropriated public funds while serving in the exact same office she wants voters to return her to. “Most people have a very narrow and skewed view of what politicians are like to begin with,” says Shuster. “There’s the old story that if you go down the list of people who are most trusted, politicians and usedcar salespeople are near the last in the list. Many people think politicians do dishonest things routinely, so they’re not going to add more fuel to the fire.” For the next few months, Carlisle says, she will spend her time trying to rebuild the trust her constituents once placed in her. “I believe in redemption,” says Carlisle. “And I want to know, do the voters believe in it too?” RN U T TA L L @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER. Must be 21 years or older to be on Rivers Casino property. Artist’s performance may contain adult-themed or suggestive material.

everpowerearthdayfestival.com NEWS

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HEALTH CONCERNS

Investigation into HIV-meds distribution highlights ongoing problems with health care at the Allegheny County Jail {BY ALEX ZIMMERMAN} ASK ALEXANDRA Morgan-Kurtz about the quality of medical care at the Allegheny County Jail and there’s an uncharacteristic pause. “I’m trying to think of a polite way to say this,” says the staff attorney of the Pennsylvania Institutional Law Project. “Probably {PHOTO BY ALEX ZIMMERMAN} the worst health care in the state I’ve seen The ACLU is investigating the irregular distribution of HIV treatments at the Allegheny County Jail. when it comes to prisons and jails.” Problems related to health care at the contends, nor is the jail keeping tabs on the jail, says PATF has received complaints county jail are hardly new. But after a the levels of virus in the blood of infected about a lack of HIV medication. March 23 City Paper story revealed that inmates, providing sufficient “pre-release Testing and treatment are “really imthe state American Civil Liberties Union counseling,” or offering enough medication portant, especially when you’re talking had launched an investigation into the upon release. about a system where men are living toBut medication-delivery problems at gether in an enclosed environment day jail’s distribution of HIV medication to the jail aren’t HIV-specific: “I don’t after day,” Christen says. Missing doses inmates, fresh questions are being think HIV/AIDS patients are get- of HIV meds can lead to future drug reraised about why these probting some kind of uniquely sistance and higher levels of virus in the lems have persisted and who Follow bad care,” says state ACLU blood, which makes spreading the disis ultimately responsible for ents Legal Director Vic Walc- ease more likely, a problem for inmates finding solutions. developm ry o of this st ak zak. “It’s emblematic of as well as for the general public when “There’s not one person re as they b . what’s happening in the inmates are released. you can point to and say, on www r [jail] health-care-delivery ‘You made that decision; you Problems related to appropriate dee p a pghcityp system as a whole.” have to fix it,’” Morgan-Kurtz livery of medications and staffing levels .com Concerns about medica- were also part of a scathing says. “That’s a huge part of the tion delivery were echoed by ad- report released last Decemproblem. There is no one to hold vocates and outside providers who ber by Allegheny County the jail accountable.” According to the ACLU, jail medical staff consistently visit the jail. Controller Chelsa Wagner, Charles Christen, executive director of who told CP that the have not been providing HIV medication in a “timely and consistent way.” Regular the Pittsburgh AIDS Task Force, an orga- ACLU’s findings “certainly HIV testing isn’t being conducted, the ACLU nization that has worked with inmates at don’t surprise me.” But figuring out who is ultimately responsible is not a straightforward task. Jail health care is directly administered by Corizon Health, a company hired in September 2013 as part of an effort to control rising costs and improve care. (Corizon receives about $ 11.5 million per year from the county.) After refusing to grant an interview request, Corizon released a statement through a third-party public-relations firm that read, “We take seriously the concerns of patients, their families and the community related to clinical quality, especially when it comes to the treatment of HIV/AIDS … many of the allegations made in this article are untrue” — a reference to the ACLU’s claims. A spokesman would not elaborate on which claims they FARM believe are untrue. X A County spokeswoman Amie Downs Visit traxfarsm.com wrote, “Providing jail medical care is chal-

lenging and there will always be issues that will need to be addressed. That being said, the administration is working alongside its numerous stakeholders to constantly address and improve the provision of medical care, and will continue to do so.” Warden Orlando Harper declined comment via Downs, and the county would not answer specific questions about potentially inconsistent medication delivery. “In regards to your question on the HIV/ AIDS policy, you will need to contact Corizon directly as that is a medical-care policy question,” Downs wrote. But Marc Stern, a former assistant secretary for health care at the Washington State Department of Corrections, says municipalities can’t simply pass responsibility for poor health care to contractors. “A lot of places privatize because they don’t understand health care and … understand it’s a high-risk, high-cost part of their jail,” says Stern, now a correctional healthcare consultant and public-health professor at the University of Washington. “Many jail administrators misunderstand that you can’t contract away all your liability in providing constitutionally appropriate health care.” The county controller approved a position on Dec. 9 for a “Healthcare Contract Monitor,” according to the controller’s office, but it is no longer posted and the position was not filled. There can be good reasons to privatize, especially if a private company can offer more competitive salaries and attract talent, Stern says. But municipalities still have an obligation to make sure the terms of that contract are being met. And he says, “If you’re going to have that much expertise anyhow, I don’t think it’s a big leap to say, ‘Why not just operate it ourselves?’” The larger issue, according to Stern, is not whether medical care is provided by a private company. (Stern formerly worked for a company that later became part of Corizon.) It’s overall funding. “I think we focus on: ‘The company’s trying to make a profit.’ You get the outcome that you paid for; [municipalities are] not willing to put the money into correctional health care that it needs,” he says. But whatever the cause of the problems it alleges, the ACLU is continuing to investigate and could move in the direction of a lawsuit “if we don’t see any kind of improvement,” Walczak says. “We’re not talking about not getting your aspirin; this is a whole lot more serious than that.”

“WE’RE NOT TALKING ABOUT NOT GETTING YOUR ASPIRIN.”

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A Z I M M E RM A N @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM


Sensational Drama | Grand Classical Ballet

WITH THE PBT ORCHESTRA APRIL 17-19, 2015 BENEDUM CENTER

TICKETS CALL: 412.456.6666 VISIT: PBT.ORG Groups of 10+ call: 412.454.9101

DISCRIMINATION IS RARELY THIS OBVIOUS. BUT IT’S JUST AS REAL AND ILLEGAL.

Artist: Alexandra Kochis | Photo: Duane Rieder

LANDMARKS PRESERVATION RESOURCE CENTER — A program of the Pittsburgh History & Landmarks Foundation

WORKSHOP: MASONRY RESTORATION TECHNIQUES In this workshop, Stephen Shelton will give a hands-on demonstration on the techniques and tricks of the trade in the craft of masonry restoration. He will also elaborate on the different materials used in the art of masonry and restoration and how that applies to specific projects. About the presenter: Stephen Shelton has 40 years of experience working in the building trades. For 12 of those years, he was the president of one of the city’s premier masonry companies; known for its high level of craftsmanship and the mark it left on many of the beautiful and historic homes in Pittsburgh. He is the founder and executive director of the Trade Institute of Pittsburgh, which is a non-profit training facility. The Institute’s goal is to give individuals, who have been incarcerated or had troubled pasts, an opportunity to learn a trade and secure a living-wage employment. This workshop is FREE TO PHLF MEMBERS. NON-MEMBERS: $5 Go to www.phlf.org for more information about PHLF membership.

TUESDAY, APRIL 7 • 6:00 - 7:30PM RSVPS ARE APPRECIATED. CONTACT MARY LU DENNY AT 412-471-5808 EXT. 527 WILKINSBURG, PA 15221

744 REBECCA AVENUE

If the landlord gives you the runaround or says: “We don’t take kids.” “The apartment you asked about on the phone has been rented.” “We only take people who speak English clearly.” The ad was wrong – the rent is really $50 more.” I can’t assign you a handicap parking space.”

THAT COULD BE HOUSING DISCRIMINATION.

412-471-5808

The only way to stop housing discrimination is to report it, so we can investigate. Contact:

Animal Rescue League

Pittsburgh Commission on Human Relations 908 City-County Building 414 Grant Street Pittsburgh, PA 15219 412-255-2600 www.pittsburghpa.gov/CHR

15th Annual

Wildlife Baby Shower Fundraiser

DROP OFF LOCATION: Gibsonia Allegheny Health and Physical Medicine 5499 William Flynn Highway

April 11, 2015 12 pm - 4 pm NEWS

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Wildlife Center 6000 Verona Rd, Verona, PA 15147 WWW.ANIMALRESCUE.ORG 412.345.7300, EXT. 500

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The Pittsburgh City Code prohibits discrimination because of race, color, religion, national origin, sex, sexual orientation, familial status, gender identity or expression, and disability. A public service announcement. Images provided by the National Fair Housing Alliance, in partnership with the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD).

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CO M P IL E D FRO M M A IN S TRE A M N E W S S O U RCE S B Y R OL AN D S WE E T. AUT HE NT I C AT I ON ON D E M AN D.

NEWS QUIRKS {BY ROLAND SWEET}

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Brian J. Byers crashed his car while driving drunk and then poured water on the road so it would look like black ice caused the crash, according to police in Sparta, N.J. Byers drove the car home and had a friend drive him back to the scene, where an officer spotted Byers carrying two 5-gallon buckets back to his friend’s car after emptying them. It’s not clear how many trips back and forth Byers made with the buckets, but the town’s public works department needed to apply half a ton of salt to make the road safe for driving. The officer charged the friend, Alexander Zambenedetti, 20, with drunken driving, too. (NJ.com)

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David Fanuelsen, 39, and Dean Brown, 22, stole construction equipment worth $8,000 from their employer, according to police in Key West, Fla. The boss, Stace Valenzuela, identified the workers as the thieves because he had overheard them planning the theft after Fanuelsen unintentionally butt-dialed him. “Talk about bumbling idiots,” Valenzuela said. (Reuters)

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Two people in east Ukraine were injured while bowling after a player rolled a grenade instead of a ball. The blast occurred at a restaurant that also offers duckpin bowling, which uses a small ball without holes. Emergency services official Sergei Ivanushkin cited the incident as the latest in a rash of accidents in the rebel-controlled area caused by careless use of explosives. (Associated Press)

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Ontario researchers announced they’ve found a link between heavy smart-

phone use and lowered intelligence. The reason, their survey suggests, is that the devices encourage lazy thinking by allowing users to solve problems with computers rather than exercise their brains. “Decades of research has revealed that humans are eager to avoid expending effort when problem-solving, and it seems likely that people will increasingly use their smartphones as an extended mind,” said study co-author Nathaniel Barr of the University of Waterloo. (United Press International)

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Sheena Keynna Miller, 27, was injured after she walked in front of a freight train while texting on her cellphone. Miller told police in Lakeland, Fla., that she didn’t hear the train horn or see the crossing arms down when she stepped onto the tracks. Police Sgt. Gary Gross said the locomotive tossed Miller into the air, fracturing her arm. (Orlando Sentinel)

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A traveler was allowed to use expedited airport security lines, even after a security officer at the airport recognized the person as a convicted felon and former member of a domestic terrorist group, according to the Department of Homeland Security Inspector General’s Office. The official report said the security officer alerted his supervisor but was told to “take no action” and let the passenger through. (NBC News)

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An investigation of a Federal Air Marshal program specialist uncovered evidence that she was rearranging the flight schedules of air marshals to coordinate sexual

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trysts. The Center for Investigative Reporting said it found that Michelle D’Antonio, 48, had apparently been using access to sensitive government databases to change flight schedules of air marshals she was interested in dating. Federal air marshals are assigned to commercial flights deemed “high risk” because they carry heavy fuel loads or important passengers. More than 60 government workers face scrutiny. (MSNBC)

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Police who spotted a pickup truck matching the description of a stolen vehicle in Destin, Fla., reported that the only occupant, Debra Jean Mason, 58, denied stealing the vehicle. She did admit knowing it was stolen but said, “I didn’t think it was that stolen.” (Northwest Florida Daily News)

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When a woman pointed a gun at a bartender in La Crosse, Wis., and demanded money, customer Jeff Steele stopped her with his Taser. The suspect, Heidi Thompson, 24, ran away but was quickly arrested. Police also charged Steele because he didn’t have a concealed-carry permit for the Taser. “When I bought it off the Internet, it said basically that it’s legal to have in the state of Wisconsin but didn’t go into any depth on it,” Steele explained, “so I assumed it was legal to carry around, otherwise why would you buy one to leave it at home?” (La Crosse’s WKBT-TV)

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Facebook announced that U.S. users can designate a “legacy contact,” who is authorized to continue posting on their page after they die, respond to new friend requests, and update their profile picture and cover

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photo. Users can also ask to have their accounts deleted after their death, a previously unavailable option. (Associated Press)

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Reporters spotted Flavio Roberto de Souza — the judge presiding over criminal proceedings against Eike Batista, once Brazil’s richest man — driving Batista’s confiscated Porsche. But Souza insisted, “I did not take it to use, just to look after.” He explained that the police didn’t have a safe place to protect it from exposure to sun, rain and possible damage, so he took it to a covered parking space in the building where he lives in Rio de Janeiro. “I want the car to be preserved in good condition,” he said. (Reuters)

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Canada’s House of Commons approved a policy change allowing military veterans who’ve lost limbs to verify their condition every three years, rather than annually. (The Canadian Press)

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Mark Rothwell was awarded the Civilian Medal for Heroism for disarming a would-be bank robber in Portland, Ore., in 2010. “We make decisions every day,” he said at the presentation ceremony by the Portland Police Bureau. “If you want to see change in the world, you be that change.” This February, police took Rothwell, 49, into custody for pointing a gun at bank tellers and demanding “all your cash.” Tracking dogs led officers to an address, where Rothwell appeared and announced, “It’s me you want. I just robbed the bank.” (Portland’s The Oregonian)


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A

To win it all FEW YEARS AGO, if players in the

Pirates spring-training clubhouse had told you that they were confident that the team could compete for the World Series title, it would have been hard not to laugh out loud. But that’s not the case anymore. Not by a long shot. “Our goal first and foremost is to win the division,” says Pirates shortstop Jordy Mercer. “We’ve been in the playoffs the past couple years, and the expectation here is no longer just to get to the playoffs. “The expectation is to win the division and ultimately get to the World Series.” He’s serious, and he’s not alone. “Our goal is to get into and win the World Series,” says Pirates closer Mark Melancon. “And we’ve made strides toward that end. The front office did a great job in the offseason with the signings they’ve made to get the guys in here to help us compete.” Adds first-baseman Pedro Alvarez: “We have our vision and goals for the upcoming season, and the task at hand has always been to win a World Series ring.” It won’t be an easy task. And with a long, grueling season ahead, here are five storylines to watch for. BY CHARLI E D EI TCH

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

THE BUCCOS HAVE ONE GOAL IN 2015:


PEDRO ALVAREZ MOVES TO FIRST BASE Batting practice is coming to a close, and Pedro Alvarez is still at first base shagging grounders. In less than two hours, he’ll put on his game uniform and play an actual spring-training game. “I’ve been feeling good, feeling pretty comfortable out there,” Alvarez says in the McKechnie Field clubhouse after that game. “I’ve been able to Pedro do that, taking every Alvarez rep at first that I can. But I’ve always done that. I’ve always worked hard regardless of the position. “Whether it’s during batting practice or just playing catch, my priority is making that position as close to second nature as I possibly can.” If the Pirates want to get over the hump this year — win the National League Central Division and become true World Series contenders — they need production both offensively and defensively from their corner infielder who is making the transition

Sean Rodriguez {PIRATES SPRING TRAINING PHOTOS FROM BRADENTON, FL. BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

from third base to first. A 2014 campaign saw Alvarez commit 25 errors — most of them involved horrific, wild throws to first base that sailed all over the infield. And defense wasn’t the only part of his game that suffered. He hit just 18 home runs and managed just 56 RBI after a 2013 season where he hit 36 home runs and 100 RBI. “My goal is to go out there every day and help this team get better and achieve its goals,” Alvarez says. If his problems in the field and at the plate can be solved by simply working harder, then Alvarez should be fine. But the Pirates aren’t leaving anything to chance. They spent $2.5 million in the offseason to sign veteran first-baseman Corey Hart (more info on page 22). And Andrew Lambo — who hasn’t been able to reproduce his monster minor-league power numbers in the majors the past two seasons — has been looking good this spring.

Every team needs a superutility guy. For the Pirates, that used to be Josh Harrison. But his ascension to superstar status left the job wide open. Enter Rodriquez, the former Tampa Bay Ray. In 2014, he had a career season at the plate, but his importance to the Pirates, according to Clint Hurdle, is his “defensive versatility.” Rodriguez is currently listed on the Pirates depth chart as the backup at four different positions. Hurdle says “he has a nose for the ball, he’s confident and can cover seven positions in my mind.”

THE PIRATES MAY HAVE THE BEST OUTFIELD IN BASEBALL Gregory Polanco Starling Marte

Andrew McCutchen

That may be a hard declaration to quantify, but it’s one of Giancarlo Stanton and Christian Yelich. But the combination of those things you know when you see it. McCutchen, Marte and Polanco will be tough to top both in E R O M Any of the Pirates’ three outfielders — from left the field and at the plate. S O T O PH field over to right, respectively, Starling Marte, Andrew All three possess blazing speed on the base paths and E LIN. McCutchen and Gregory Polanco — could play can hit for power. And, as good as McCutchen has been ONw w w centerfield on any other team in the country. with the Pirates, there’s a chance at some point in the next paper pghcitym “I think we have a chance to catch every ball that’s couple of seasons that he will be surpassed by Polanco. While .co hit to the outfield, every ball,” Marte told the Pittsburgh Polanco’s major-league debut last June was much-heralded, Tribune-Review in February. he struggled at times in his 277 plate appearances. But he has There’s certainly competition out there for the best-outfield intangibles — like the ability to produce a five-hit game in just his title. Mainly, the Florida Marlins, a team that features Marcell Ozuna, third big-league appearance — that make you think the sky’s the limit. CONTINUES ON PG. 18

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PIRATES PREVIEW, CONTINUED FROM PG. 17

Jordy Mercer

Jameson Taillon This year should have been the big right-hander’s first full season in the major leagues, but after suffering an elbow injury requiring Tommy John surgery in 2014, Taillon will start the year in AAA. Still, expect to see him sooner rather than later. Adding his young arm to the lineup will strengthen a Pirates rotation that is fairly solid even if it does have a few soft spots, mainly A.J. Burnett’s age and Charlie Morton’s injury history.

Neil Walker

CONSISTENCY, CONSISTENCY, CONSISTENCY There’s no doubt that the Pirates have a good collection of ballplayers. But to become great and take the next step, they have to be consistently better every day. Take defense, for example. As a team last year, the Pirates had a big problem with errors — their total of 109 was the third-worst in all of baseball and the worst in the National League. But things are looking better, says manager Clint Hurdle. “We just committed our first error of the spring yesterday, 10 games into the season,” Hurdle says. “That’s significant. We’re doing a lot of things well, and we just need to work hard and get better every day.” One area where the Pirates have continued to struggle is offensively. Despite the potential for big hits in key moments with players like Alvarez, McCutchen, Marte and second baseman Neil Walker, the Bucs haven’t always come through, and those woes have continued this spring.

“I think we have been very consistent in all aspects of our game except offensive consistency,” Hurdle says. “We are going to continue to work toward being the offense that we know we can be. Pitch selection is going to be critical — we’ve got to get good pitches to hit.” It can be done: Mercer’s 2014 campaign showed that. He began 2014 as the starting shortstop but struggled mightily at the plate Josh and in the field, committing 11 errors. But he Harrison was able to turn it around and become a key component for the Pirates, finishing the season with 12 home runs and 55 RBI. He says those struggles have helped him going into this year. “I’m confident going into this year because I struggled so much at the beginning of last year and was able to overcome it,” Mercer says. “It was really a tough couple of months, but my teammates believed in my abilities and, more importantly, I believed in myself and I was able to bounce back. “I’m a better player today because of that.”

A.J. BURNETT IS STILL THE MAN Fan reaction to the return of pitcher A.J. Burnett has been mixed. Many are still upset because he left the Pirates after the 2013 season for the Philadelphia Phillies for a huge payday ($15 million). Fans didn’t want to welcome him back when the Pirates re-signed him in the offseason. But even at 38, Burnett is a wise $8.5 million investment for what he brings with his arm and his heart. Most of his work last year in Philadelphia was unremarkable except for one fact — he pitched nearly the entire season with a sports hernia. “I don’t know many men that would have been able to get through the season that he got through last year with the physical [ailment] that he dealt with. He kept taking the ball,” says Hurdle. During the two seasons Burnett spent in Pittsburgh, he became a team leader at a time when the team desperately needed one. That role in the clubhouse has served him well on his return. “[Burnett] coming back now has been a seamless transition because of the relationships that had already developed,” adds Hurdle. “What we know we’re going to get is a fierce competitor on the mound that takes the ball 30 to 35 times a year and gives you 200 innings. He brings an edge to everything he does.”

A.J. Burnett

CONTINUES ON PG. 20

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015


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PIRATES PREVIEW, CONTINUED FROM PG. 18

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

Francisco Cervelli

No one needs a primer on the Cardinals. Since 2005, they have won two World Series crowns, three National League pennants and five division titles. They’ve got power in Matt Holliday, Matt Adams and Matt Carpenter, plus as a good a starting rotation as anyone in the game, led by Adam Wainwright and Michael Wacha. And it doesn’t get easier from there. The division is a who’s-who of MLB’s best talent. The Brewers come to the table with Ryan Braun, Jonathan Lucroy, Carlos Gomez and Matt Garza. The Reds are loaded, with Joey Votto, Billy Hamilton, Todd Frazier, Johnny Cueto and Aroldis Chapman. Then there’s Chicago. While the rest of the world expects the Cubs to choke regardless of the talent they possess, that would be a fatal error. There are few teams with a deeper minor-league system than the Pirates, but the Cubs are one of them, and many of those players will take the field in 2015. The Cubs are stacked with young stars including Anthony Rizzo, Starlin Castro, Javier Baez, Kris Bryant and Jorge Soler. Add to that Jon Lester, the most highly sought free-agent pitcher in baseball, and the Cubs are no easy out in 2015. When asked about the rest of the division, shortstop Jordy Mercer says the Pirates can’t worry too much about what other teams are doing. “Some guys might pay attention, but I don’t,” he says. “All I can do and all we can do as a team is get ready to go out and play and win games, [and] control what we can control. “If we get everybody on the right page at the right time, we’ll be fine.” C DE IT C H @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

Jung-ho Kang So far in spring training, Kang hasn’t shown the offensive power that persuaded the Pirates to offer him a fouryear, $11 million deal in the offseason. Last season, playing in his home country of South Korea, Kang showed monster power, whacking 40 home runs and 117 RBI. His glove has looked solid, but as an infielder he’s locked behind Josh Harrison at third and Jordy Mercer at short. Yet like Harrison last year, if Kang can start hitting regularly, they’ll find a place for him to play.


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{BY CHARLIE DEITCH} CLINT HURDLE obviously doesn’t like what

he’s seeing. For several minutes, the Pirates manager watches his players run basestealing drills. Then he just has to interrupt. But when he does, it’s not in an explosion of anger or in a fit of flying objects. He simply walks out to the middle of the field and addresses his team. “Watch the signals, that’s all you have to do,” Hurdle tells his players in a voice that is far from a yell, but still emphatic and definitive. “When you look good, you get the credit. When you look bad, I get the blame. So you may as well do it right and look good.” The drill resumes. They do it right. “That-a-boy Cervelli,” Hurdle yells to Francisco Cervelli, the Pirates’ new catcher. Praise, as predicted. But Hurdle’s notion of credit and blame isn’t just a truism for this drill. It hold is true throughout the season, which his team hopes will last well into October. That’s how he has managed this club since being hired in November 2010. He is clearly its leader, and is as much the reason for its success since 2013 as any player on the diamond. “Clint’s the guy who took a losing organization and turned it into a winning one,” says Pirates closer Mark Melancon. “He’s a great communicator and a great motivator. He’s the kind of manager that guys want to go out and play well for.” As fans know all too well, that hadn’t been the case in Pittsburgh for a very long time. Since former manager Jim Leyland left in 1996, the team has seen a revolving door of skippers. Jim Tracy, John Russell, Lloyd McClendon and Gene Lamont all came and went. None of them won, and none of them stayed more than a few years. Once Hurdle completes the 2015 campaign, his fifth, he will have more service time than any of those guys, and will also likely be the only one of them with an overall winning record. While there was some hopefulness

{PHOTOS BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Clint Hurdle

when Hurdle joined the team in 2010, there was also the feeling that Hurdle might just be the next guy before the next guy. On the positive side, Hurdle had taken the Colorado Rockies to the World Series in 2007, only to be swept by the Boston Red Sox. However, in May 2009, less than two months into the season, the Rockies fired him. Hurdle then spent a year as the hitting coach of the Texas Rangers, returning to the World Series (where the Rangers lost to the San Francisco Giants). His Pirates tenure also had a tumultuous start. Despite posting winning records by the All-Star break in both 2011 and 2012, the team imploded both times, extending the franchise losing streak to 20 seasons. Those days seem long behind the Pirates. Wild-card berths the past two years have everyone believing that things can be different. Now, when Pirates players use the world “playoffs” and “World Series” in the clubhouse, the reaction isn’t an eye-roll, it’s a nod of agreement. And while it’s the players who win games, they’re among the first to tell you where the real credit for that new attitude lies. “Clint’s impact on this franchise has been huge,” says first baseman Pedro Alvarez. “He came to this franchise when you had a group of guys who needed a beacon of light, if you want to call it that. Guys needed someone to give them a push and that’s what he provided.” Adds shortstop Jordy Mercer: “Not only has [Hurdle] brought a positive vibe to this team, he’s brought a winning vibe. The Pittsburgh Pirates are in the mix of things each and every year. That’s huge.” CD EI TC H @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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COVERING HER TEAM

Ellwood City woman turns Pirates freebies into family keepsakes

Corey Hart

{BY CHARLIE DEITCH} ANY FAN who’s ever been to a home game

at PNC Park on a Friday night can quickly tell you where Nancy Thomas got the fabric for her Pirates quilt. “We had all these T-shirts from the Friday night T-shirt giveaways and thought, ‘What are we going to do with all of these?’” Thomas, a season-ticket holder, told City Paper on a hot, sunny morning at McKechnie Field, the Pirates’ spring-training home in Bradenton, Fla. “We couldn’t wear them all.” She stops speaking as her attention turns toward the field. Tony Sanchez, the Buccos’ young catching prospect, is jogging off the field after the morning’s drills. “Tony! Tony! Can you sign my quilt?” she asks. Sanchez pleasantly declines and says he’ll catch her later, after he dresses for the game. She’s not too disheartened. “A lot of times they’ll sign on the way to the dugout before the game,” she said.

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{PHOTO BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Steve and Nancy Thomas with her Pirates quilt at spring training in Bradenton, on March 13

“I can understand why they might not want to do it after batting practice. They are working.” By now, making her quilts and getting signatures from current and former players and broadcasters is a rite of spring for Thomas and her husband, Steve. This is the fourth quilt she’s made since 2012 and al-

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ready, in the second week of camp, it’s getting full of autographs. She first came to spring training in 2011. A weekend trip to Florida to see the Bucs started a tradition. She soon got her husband to join her, and now that he’s retired, they can spend more time in Florida, watching the team get ready for the season — and gathering signatures on the new quilt. On the first quilt, which she made in 2012, she got about 70 signatures. That item was donated to Pirates Charities, the franchise’s fundraising arm, and auctioned off during the annual Pirates Fest. She’s since made three more and they’ve been earmarked for her grandchildren. This year’s quilt is a bit different. On the far left side of the second row of patches is not a free T-shirt but a gray Pirates golf shirt. It belonged her to father, George Miller, who died in December 2013, at the age of 97. “If the Pirates were on, the radio was on. My father loved baseball, and he loved the Pirates,” she said. “He took my brother and I down to the last game ever at Forbes Field [in 1970]. Then my brother and I took him to the last game at Three Rivers Stadium. We had such a good time.” Thomas says her father enjoyed the games until the end, and she is glad her dad got to see the Pirates break their 20year losing streak, in the fall of 2013. “He was still very sharp even at 97, he knew the players and watched all the games. I’m so glad he got to see what they did that year. “I think it’s nice to see his shirt up there on the quilt this year.” C DE IT C H @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

During his years with the Milwaukee Brewers, Hart always seemed to put up big offensive numbers against the divisionrival Pirates. Now he’s one of them in, at least for now, a platoon at first base with Pedro Alvarez. Hart hasn’t played much since 2012 due to injury. He missed all of 2013 and played sporadically last year in Seattle. But there was a time when you could pencil him in before the season for 25-30 homers and 80-100 RBI. At 33, those days might be behind him. But if he’s even half of his former self on a part-time basis, the Pirates have made a good investment.


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11604 KELEKET DR | PENN HILLS | 412.243.5214 24

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

Trib sportswriter’s new book tells how Bucs turned things around with sabermetrics {BY JODY DIPERNA} FOR 20 YEARS, Pittsburgh Pirates baseball needed a term grander, more operatic, than futility in motion. As much fun to watch as a stinkbug collection, the team drove its fans to both outrage and apathy, an impressive balancing act. Then came 2013, when the team started to win and kept on winning, all the way to the National League Division Series. The love affair was back on with a vengeance. In his very readable and revealing new book, Big Data Baseball (Flatiron Books), Pittsburgh Tribune-Review baseball writer Travis Sawchik explores just how the Pirates turned their narrative around. From the GM’s office right down through the last man in the bullpen, Sawchik explores the innovative, risky and possibly desperate approach that took the Pirates

from wretched to sublime in 2013. How did the small-market, evensmaller-budget team do it? They developed and scouted talent like Andrew McCutchen, Gerrit Cole and Starling Marte even as they embraced new technology. General manager Neal


Huntington focused much energy on building a team to collect and analyze reams and reams of data. That was a particularly gargantuan task, given that when Huntington came on board in 2007, the Pirates had no in-house analytics in place. That alone might go a long way toward explaining that 20-year losing streak. Huntington assembled some of the sharpest, most creative numbers-crunchers around to bring the Pirates to the forefront of the technology revolution. In the 1970s, Bill James started analyzing baseball data in new and fresh ways, an approach known as sabermetrics. In the 1990s, Major League Baseball took notice, and a few small-market teams eased into the waters of sabermetrics. Michael Lewis’ 2003 book Moneyball, for instance, chronicled the Oakland As’ commitment to scouting and evaluating offensive talent with sabermetrics. Moneyball-era sabermetrics focused exclusively on generating more base-runners, ignoring defensive contributions. Unable to buy offensive firepower or high-priced pitching aces on the free market, the Pirates turned to the defensive side of the coin, finding new ways to allow fewer runs. They committed to a variety of “defensive shifts,” wherein fielders move from their typical, equidistant positions on the field to spots where an opposing batter is likely to hit a ball. They valued defensive speed, particularly fast outfielders who could turn fly-ball singles into outs in PNC Park’s cavernous left field. They valued pitch-framing, thanks in large part to catcher Russell Martin (now departed to the Toronto Blue Jays), to assure that pitches that could be called either way would be deemed strikes. Ever since Bill James sat down with a stat sheet and a pencil, there has been a divide between the bean-counters and the men who coach and play the game. Sometimes there is detente and sometimes open warfare, but, rarely, if ever, have the two sides worked together peacefully and purposefully. If Huntington was the man with the vision, manager Clint Hurdle is the heart of Sawchik’s book, the human bridge connecting the analytics team with the more traditional players and coaches. There is a romanticism at the core of baseball, but the Pirates, through Hurdle, managed to hang on to baseball tradition while embracing new technology. Sawchik remains grounded in telling these very human stories as he deftly describes the advances in analytics that helped the team win 94 games in 2013. Big Data Baseball goes on sale on May 19.

FUNDRAISING

Tony Watson

THREE GREATS EVENTS

Everyone knows how important closer Mark Melancon is to the Pirates. But a very close second in the bullpen is left-handed power pitcher Tony Watson. Watson was an All-Star in 2014, posting a 1.63 ERA and an impressive 81 strikeouts in 78 games, typically as the setup man. He was second in the entire league in holds (34) — meaning if the Buccos can get him the ball with a lead in the eighth, it will likely stay that way.

RECYCLE FOR BOTH MAN AND ANIMALS!

Saturday, April 18

JUST IN-TIME FOR EARTH DAY!

Help the Animal Rescue League raise money by simply donating your gently used clothing, shoes, housewares, and more, but no furniture please! We earn money for every pound of donated items brought to the Animal Rescue League Shelter located at 6620 Hamilton Avenue, Pittsburgh, PA 15206!

10:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. Orro Fundraising is an eco-centric entity, helping to eliminate e-waste, while repurposing refurbishment candidates, and recycling scrap material responsibly. We cannot accept CRT televisions/monitors, batteries, lightbulbs, or appliances with harmful chemicals. Bring your electronic items to the Animal Rescue League Shelter located at 6620 Hamilton Avenue, Pittsburgh, PA 15206!

10:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m.

Bring all of your paper items that have to be shredded to Compass Storage, located at 6921 Fifth Ave, Pittsburgh, PA 15208. Iron City will make sure all of your paper items, including your personal papers, are destroyed. Limit three boxes per carload.

10:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m.

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THE LAMB CHOP WAS LIGHTLY FLAVORED BY AN OLIVE OIL-ROSEMARY RUB

COFFEE & GARDEN {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} Kate and Mark Morris aren’t huge coffee people. Their Staghorn Home & Garden Café sprang from the free java they dispensed while selling Kate Morris’ decorative terrariums at I Made It! Market events. They opened Staghorn in December, around the corner from the Greenfield house they share with their son, Sam, who’s nearly 2, because they thought the neighborhood could use it. The building retains the striped awning and exterior mural of former neighborhood fixture Community Drug. Inside, along with locally roasted Zeke’s Coffee, Staghorn vends houseplants, organic vegetable seeds, even potting soil and garden tools. (The inspiration was Kate Morris’ green thumb.) Some of the shop’s vintage furnishings are also for sale, as are greeting cards and handmade candles. Both spouses have graduate degrees in architecture; Mark Morris left his job as a construction estimator to launch Staghorn. Most customers are from the neighborhood, he says, and the growth in clientele recently convinced them to hire their first employee. Staghorn opens at 6 a.m. six days a week (7 a.m. on Sundays), and serves treats including Enrico’s biscotti and scones. Thursday through Sunday, there’s also Enrico’s quiche and Soup Nancy soups. After fielding multiple requests for lattes and the like, the café has added an espresso machine, too. As Mark Morris says, “You hear [the request] five or 10 times a day, you’re like, ‘Eh, maybe we should get one.’” DRISCOLL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

517 Greenfield Ave., Greenfield. 412-3157298 or www.staghorngardencafe.com

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It’s worth remembering that you can bring your own food into PNC Park. Sure, buying an overpriced hot dog and beer might be part of the fun, but why not save on peanuts? You can get a lot into the permitted 16-by-16-by-8-inch soft-sided bag.

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ON THE

MAP {PHOTOS BY HEATHER MULL}

{BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

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T FIRST GLANCE, 424 Walnut is similar to a restaurant type that .abounds in the Pittsburgh market: in the words of its own Facebook page, it offers “fine Italian and American cuisine in a casual, relaxed atmosphere.” With such a formula, which relies on broad appeal rather than niche-market verve, an establishment that doesn’t exceed expectations on every front — menu, preparation, service and atmosphere — risks a quick fade into the walnut-stained woodwork. 424 Walnut, named for its address in Sewickley, is the new venture of chef-owner Jimmy Zipparo, who previously co-owned the popular Sweetwater Grille in the same space. His new venture is a restaurant that punches above its weight with a solid menu, a confident kitchen, friendly yet professional service, and an attractive, comfortable dining room. The space, long ago transformed from a repair garage into a modestly upscale restaurant space, is airy with high ceilings and big front windows. Wood and glass half-walls break the

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

Grilled American red snapper bella vista

large floor up into cozy nooks, and a cheerful bar lines one wall. The lone TV above the bar didn’t intrude on the dining experience, which offered plenty of booth seating, while being appointed with subtle signs of sophistication that suggested the food would be a cut above.

424 WALNUT 424 Walnut St., Sewickley. 412-741-7143 HOURS: Mon.-Sat. 11 a.m.-10 p.m. PRICES: Appetizers, soups, salads, sandwiches $4-17; entrees $17-37 LIQUOR: Full bar

CP APPROVED And it was. Beans-and-greens, crab Hoelzel, chops and pasta are all essential ingredients of a typical, old-school Pittsburgh menu. But 424 Walnut has devised a sort of curated version of the local canon, unafraid to omit fried zucchini or chicken parm. Even items as ubiquitous as steak salad and strip steak were given updated, thoughtful touches, such as roasted potatoes on the former and

roasted-garlic truffle butter on the latter. Reading this menu raised our confidence that the kitchen wasn’t merely painting by number, but that Chef Zipparo knows what he does best. The night of our visit, the specials were particularly appetizing. The pasta special, French country linguini, was a wonderfully conceived amalgam of diced ham and spring vegetables in a “light parmesan cream” sauce. The Alfredo-like sauce was, in fact, a touch heavy, but the ham did a lovely job of flavoring the dish without smothering the vegetables, which ranged from tender-crisp asparagus to still-bright peas and wilted baby spinach, all infused with bright herbs and mellow chopped shallots. This homey dish, with its Easter-y ham and nary a root vegetable, was beautifully aligned with the hopeful end to a long, cold winter. Another special, chicken Romano, can be a bit of an afterthought: plain chicken breast pan-fried in a cheesy batter that doesn’t try too hard to do too much. But 424 Walnut’s version was superb, with extraordinarily


tender, succulent chicken in a coating balanced between egg and Romano cheese factors. Enhanced with lemon butter and white wine, the effect was complex, savory and rich, but never soggy or heavy. From the daily menu, the Colorado lamb chops stood out. We ordered just one at a not-insignificant price (two chops are also available), but this early-spring treat was worth it. The chop was charred without, prettily pink within and lightly flavored by an olive oil-rosemary rub. Even more of a standout were the vegetables. A mixture of zucchini, red peppers and thinly sliced shiitake mushrooms, this was exemplary of the vegetable medley, which is so often no more than a hash of, seemingly, whatever happens to be in oversupply in the kitchen. Here, the combination of vegetables seemed deliberately and carefully chosen, and each was cooked to a suitable doneness and lightly seasoned in a simple, buttery coating. Roasted red-skin potatoes were near perfect — crisp and creamy, and with a salty exterior mated to the mild interior.

On the RoCKs

{BY DREW CRANISKY}

EGGS FOR YOUR COCKTAIL GLASS

Raw eggs in booze are traditional, safe and delicious

We were intrigued by beans-andgreens served over penne with jumbo Gulf shrimp and hot Italian sausage. As aficionados of beans-and-greens, we anticipated this as a worthy upgrade of one of our favorite Italian appetizers to the status of a hearty meal. Strangely, however, not a single bean was in evidence in our dish, leaving the flavor profile, not to mention the texture, lacking in the cannellini’s essential, creamy earthiness. After all this, we still couldn’t resist 424 Walnut’s housemade desserts. Redvelvet cheesecake played to the strengths of the tiring red-velvet craze, with creamy cocoa flavor, cheesy tang and a luscious texture. Key lime pie delivered a suitably puckery ratio between sweetness and citrus tartness. 424 Walnut offers a solid, satisfying take on the kind of food Pittsburghers have loved for years — and gives us reason to keep on loving it.

Sunday is Easter, which means stockpiles of plastic grass, chocolate bunnies and, of course, eggs. Most of them will be garishly dyed and turned into way more egg salad than anyone could possibly want. But if you happen to have a few left unboiled, you can add some serious depth to your cocktail game. I’ve encountered my share of skeptical (read: utterly disgusted) looks when introducing people to eggy cocktails. And I’ll admit that shimmying a mucousy egg white into a shaker of bourbon does set off all sorts of alarms. But here are three good reasons to do it anyway. For one, people have been mixing eggs and booze for centuries. Flips, a loose category of drinks made from some combination of spirits, sugar, beer and eggs, were all the rage in colonial taverns. Often served warm, a flip was surely the most efficient drink around. What else could fill your belly, shake off the chill and get you buzzed, all at once? Secondly, raw eggs present a minimal risk when handled properly. When using eggs in cocktails, follow the same precautions you would for making mayonnaise or frying up a dippy egg. Get the freshest eggs you can find, keep them cold and use them quickly. Populations with compromised immune systems, including children, pregnant women and people who are ill, should avoid raw eggs. Of course, those folks ought to be avoiding eggless cocktails as well. Finally — and this is the most compelling argument of all — egg drinks are awesome. Egg whites impart a silky, frothy texture, while whole eggs make for decidedly indulgent drinks. The Pisco Sour is a great warm-weather cocktail that showcases the power of eggs. The egg white gives the basic sour some body and rounds out the grape brandy’s sharp edges. Mix one up, and suddenly the need to extract all that Easter grass from the vacuum cleaner won’t seem so bad.

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House-made mascarpone cheesecake

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THE FOLLOWING DINING LISTINGS ARE RESTAURANTS RECOMMENDED BY CITY PAPER FOOD CRITICS

DINING LISTINGS KEY

J = Cheap K = Night Out L = Splurge E = Alcohol Served F = BYOB

Serving Breakfast & Lunch

Monday & Thursday $2 Yuengling 16oz Draft ____________________

TACOS & CARIBBEAN FUSION

Tuesday

East Liberty

130 S. Highland Ave. Pittsburgh, PA 15206 412.362.7969

Beechview

2056 Broadway Ave. Pittsburgh, PA 15216 412.344.4700

casarastapgh.com

Did d yo you know you kno k now n ow we off ow offer... offer ffer... • B Breakfast Br kf t All AlD Day • Vegetarian Options • Gluten-Free • Preservative Free • Sausage & Angus Beef • Locally Home-Grown Vegetables • And so much more 1718 Mt. Royal Blvd Mt. Royal Plaza | GLENSHAW Next to Shaler Middle School

www.colecafe.com (412) 486-5513

1/2 Price Wine by the Bottle ____________________

Wednesday

Pork & Pounder $10 ____________________

Friday

Sangria $2.95 ____________________

Saturday & Sunday 10:30am-3pm

Brunch Specials & Bloody Mary Bar

----- HAPPY HOUR ----1/2 OFF SNACKS $2 OFF DRAFTS $5 WINE FEATURE

Mon- Fri 4:30 – 6:30pm ____________________ 900 Western Ave. I NORTH SIDE

412-224-2163

BenjaminsPgh.com

Thank you City Paper readers for voting us one of the Best Chinese Restaurants in Pittsburgh

40 Craft Beers

China Palace Shadyside Featuring cuisine in the style of

Peking, Hunan, Szechuan and Mandarin

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ontap w

BRUNCH 10am-2pm Sat & SUN

Famous BBQ RiBS! Vegan &Veggie Specialties,too!

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

24th & E. Carson St. in the South Side 412-390-1111 100 Adams Shoppes Mars/Cranberry 724-553-5212 DoubleWideGrill.com

BIGELOW GRILLE: REGIONAL COOKING AND BAR. Doubletree Hotel, One Bigelow Square, Downtown. 412-281-5013. This upscale restaurant offers fine foods with Steeltown flair, like “Pittsburgh rare” seared tuna (an innovation borrowed from steelworkers cooking meat on a blast furnace). The menu is loaded with similar ingenious combinations and preparations. KE CAFÉ DELHI. 205 Mary St., Carnegie. 412-278-5058. A former Catholic church in Carnegie now houses an Indian café, with a menu ranging from dosa to biryani to palak paneer. From a cafeteria-style menu, order street snacks (chaats, puris), or the nugget-like, spicy fried “Chicken 65.” Hearty fare includes chickpea stew, and a kebab wrapped in Indian naan bread. JF CAFÉ NOTTE. 8070 Ohio River Blvd., Emsworth. 412-761-2233. Tapas from around the globe are on the menu at this charmingly converted old gas station. The small-plate preparations are sophisticated, and the presentations are uniformly lovely. Flavors range from Asian-style crispy duck wings and scallops-three-ways to roasted peppers stuffed with ricotta. KE CAFFE DAVIO. 2516 E. Carson St., South Side. 412-431-1119. By day, a tiny store-front diner, serving omelets and pancakes, and by evening, an authentic and delightful Italian restaurant. The menu — both prix fixe and a la carte — focuses on the authentic flavors of Sicily, such as pasta Norma and veal alla Palermitana, while occasionally invoking the short-order tradition, as with the hash of potatoes, peppers and onions. KF COCA CAFÉ. 3811 Butler St., Lawrenceville. 412-621-3171. This café is somehow hip but not pretentious. Variety predominates: The omelets alone include smoked salmon, wild mushroom, roasted vegetable, sun-dried tomato pesto and four-cheese. (Coca also caters to vegans, with options like scrambled tofu in place of eggs.) JF GAUCHO PARRILLA. 1607 Penn Ave., Strip District. 412-709-6622. Wood-fired meat and vegetables, paired with delectable sauces, make this tiny Argentine-

JG’s Tarentum Station Grille {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} barbecue eatery worth stopping at. The beef, chicken, sausage and seafood is all infused with flavor from the wood grill. Add-on sauces include: chimichurri; ajo (garlic and herbs in olive oil); cebolla, with caramelized onions; and the charred-pepper pimenton. KF

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Village Tavern

JG’S TARENTUM STATION GRILLE. 101 Station Drive, Tarentum. 724-226-3301. An old-school continental menu and a well-restored train station make this restaurant a destination. The menu leans toward Italian fine dining, plus steaks and chops. But well-charred chicken Louisiana and dishes featuring habañero and poblano peppers denote some contemporary American updating. LE JIMMY WAN’S. 1337 Old Freeport Road, Fox Chapel (412-968-0848) and 1686 Route 228, Cranberry (724-778-8978). This upscale eatery delivers what Americans expect from a Chinese restaurant, plus fare with a modern, pan-Asian approach, complete with Japanese and French influences.

Wan’s offers inventive appetizers such as sashimi ceviche, traditional and creative sushi, dim sum and ChineseAmerican entrees both familiar (Peking duck) and less so (dan dan noodles). KE LOS CHILUDOS. 325 Southpointe Blvd., Suite 300, Canonsburg. 724-745-6791. This casual neighborhood taqueria offers classic MexicanAmerican fare sprinkled with more authentic options such as tinga (saucy stewed pork) and sopes, thick cornmeal cakes. Los Chiludos excels with Americanized Mexican dishes, imbuing them with authentic ingredients and preparations that recalls the fresh, flavorful fast food as it’s prepared in Mexico. JF MAD MEX. Multiple locations. www.madmex.com. This local chain’s several lively, funkily decorated restaurants boast an inventive selection of Cal-Mex cuisines. Mad Mex is a good stop for vegetarians, with dishes such as chick-pea chili and eggplant burrito. It’s not genuine Mexican by a long shot, but if there were a country with this food, it’d be great to vacation there. JE MENDOZA EXPRESS. 812 Mansfield Road, Green Tree. 412-429-8780. The décor is pure kitsch — sombreros on the walls, etc. — and the location is a bit obscure. But the menu is ample, and the food is as authentic as you’ll find in Pittsburgh. (Try the rebozo, a scramble of chorizo, peppers and cheese.) JF PAPAYA. 210 McHolme Drive, Robinson. 412-494-3366. Papaya offers a fairly typical Thai menu — from pad Thai to panang curry — augmented by sushi and a few generic Chinese dishes. The


AWA R

Work yourself into a lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Sun Penang {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} selection may have erred more on the side of reliability than excitement, but the presentations show that the kitchen is making an impression. KE PINO’S CONTEMPORARY ITALIAN. 6738 Reynolds St., Point Breeze. 412-361-1336. The menu at this Italian eatery spans from sandwiches that hearken back to its pizzeria days, through pastas of varying sophistication, to inventive, modern entrees. Some dishes pull out the stops, including seafood Newburg lasagna and veal with artichokes, peppers, olives and wild mushrooms over risotto. But don’t forgo the flatbread pizzas, many with gourmet options. KE

exotic ingredients, between your party and adjacent diners. LE SUN PENANG. 5829 Forbes Ave., Squirrel Hill. 412-421-7600. Sun Penang’s aesthetic is Asian — simple but not austere — and to peruse its menu is to explore the cuisines of Thailand, Malaysia and Singapore. The Pangan ikan is a house specialty, and the Malaysian kway teow (practically the country’s national dish) may be the best you ever have without a tourist visa. JE

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1/2 /2 OFF O ALL DRAFTS & $2 OFF MUNCHIES

Curry & Jerk Chicken, C Fish or S Shrimp.

Mon-Thurs 5-7 Fri & Sat 4:30-7:30

Daily Specials!

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TANA ETHIOPIAN CUISINE. 5929 Baum Blvd., East Liberty. 412-665-2770. The menu offers a variety of stewed meats, legumes and veggies, all rich with warm spices. Order the sampler PUSADEE’S platters for the best GARDEN. 5321 Butler variety of flavors, www. per pa St., Lawrenceville. and ask for a glass pghcitym o .c 412-781-8724. of tej, a honey-based Traditional Thai sauces wine that is the perfect and curries from scratch are accompaniment. KE among the reasons to stop by this charming eatery, which TIN FRONT CAFÉ. 216 E. Eighth boasts an outdoor patio. Ave., Homestead. 412-461-4615. Don’t miss the latke-like shrimp Though the menu is brief, cakes, the classically prepared inventive vegetarian meals push tom yum gai soup or the spicy past the familiar at this charming duck noodles. KF Homestead café. The emphasis is on fresh, local and unexpected, ROSE TEA CAFÉ. 5874 Forbes such as asparagus slaw or Ave., Squirrel Hill. 412-421-2238. beet risotto. In season, there’s This bubble-tea café has a charming rear patio. JE broadened its offerings to include high-quality, authentic Chinese TOMATO PIE CAFÉ. 885 East cooking. The menu is dominated Ingomar Road, Allison Park. by Taiwanese dishes, including a 412-364-6622. Located on the variety of seafood items. In place verdant edge of North Park, of the thick, glossy brown sauces Tomato Pie is more than a which seem all but inevitable pizzeria. It offers other simple at most American Chinese Italian specialties including pasta restaurants, Rose Tea keeps things and sandwiches, and the chef light with delicate sauces that uses plenty of fresh herbs grown are more like dressings for their on the premises. FJ fresh-tasting ingredients. KF VILLAGE TAVERN & SALT OF THE EARTH. 5523 Penn TRATTORIA. 424 S. Main St., Ave., Garfield. 412-441-7258. West End. 412-458-0417. This Salt embodies a singular vision warm, welcoming, and satisfying for not just eating, but fully Italian restaurant is a reason experiencing food. The everto brave the West End Circle. changing but compact menu The menu offers variety within reflects a hybrid style, combining a few narrowly constrained cutting-edge techniques with categories: antipasti, pizza and traditional ingredients to create pasta, with the pasta section unique flavor and texture organized around seven noodle combinations. Salt erases shapes, from capelli to rigatoni, distinctions — between fine and each paired with three or four casual dining, between familiar and distinct sauces. KE

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The FRESHEST Local Produce from The Strip

SAVOR AUTHENTIC FLAVORS FROM OAXACA & MEXICO CITY AT THE MEXICAN UNDERGROUND IN THE STRIP

TIC THAI CUISINE AUTHEN

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Every Monday thru Friday from 5-7 PM. • 1/2 Off Draft Beers • $1 Off Bottled Beers • $2 Off Margaritas • “Beer of the Day” specials and Nacho specials.

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LOCAL

“WE HAVE A WHOLE SEPARATE OUTLET FOR THAT SIDE OF OUR INTERESTS.”

BEAT

{BY ALEX GORDON}

The main floor of Matt Very’s new recording studio is beginning to take shape. There are no soundboards, no microphones, nothing like that. In fact, there are few lights or doors, and the “studio” layout requires some imagination. But two years into the construction of Very Tight Recordings’ new Sharpsburg location, the space is starting to resemble what Very sees in his head. Very Tight Recordings has been Very’s production project for almost eight years. In that time, he’s worked out of four different locations; he currently rents space in the South Hills. With a new studio — which he hopes to complete this summer — Very aims to give his company and recording career a permanent home. Very purchased the building (“a piece of land with four walls”) in 2012 and discovered problems from the start — leaky roof, water and fire damage, and an endless supply of junk left by the previous owner. With help from his father, an electrical engineer, Very has spent nearly every free moment in the past two years cleaning, repairing and fixing up the three-floor, 9,000-square-foot fixer-upper. “Everybody wants to be the cool engineer,” says the 25-year-old West Mifflin native. “But nobody wants to put in the work.” That DIY mentality is a staple of Very Tight Recordings and the person behind it. Very started learning production in high school after his band hired a local producer to record its demo CD — with less-than-stellar results. “That was my wakeup,” says Very, who then resolved to do it better on his own. He spent his senior year poring over recording textbooks and learning production by trial and error in his high school’s music-tech lab. Now, nearly a decade later, Very has recorded nearly 400 projects in a variety of genres. He has a particularly good ear for hardcore, and his resume includes Code Orange Kids’ 2011 release Cycles, which Very says helped shape his production style early on. He’s comfortable recording in any musical style, but, predictably, he prefers projects where he’s involved from start to finish. “Every time I do an album a full way through, record, mix and master it,” Very says, “that’s my favorite thing to do.” INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

For more information, visit verytightrecordings.com.

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Matt Very {PHOTO COURTESY OF OLIVIA CIOTOLI}

TIGHTER SPOT

GOING OFF-ROAD {BY MARGARET WELSH}

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DVENTURES’ new record, Supersonic

Home, is full of wistfulness and .longing, heartache and self-aware admissions. Musically, it worships at the altar of fuzzed-out ’90s rock and is rife with melody and urgent harmonies. The album artwork, a swirl of blues and purples, looks like something you might find on a long-lost Superchunk or Helium record. Listening to Supersonic Home, you might never suspect that four of the band’s six members are also part of hardcore band Code Orange, whose last release, I Am King, was described breathlessly by some reviewers as “nihilistic horror” and “playing on every ounce of rage you’ve ever known.” It’s not strange that the same group of people should enjoy a wide range of music, or express emotional range. But it is rare for two bands with so many shared members to confidently create such different musical atmospheres. “We try to keep it as separate as we can, otherwise it wouldn’t make sense,” ex-

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

{PHOTO COURTESY OF KIMI HANAUER}

Adventures: (from left) Jami Morgan, Kimi Hanauer, Reba Meyers, Dominic Landolina and Joe Goldman

plains Reba Meyers, who plays guitar and sings in both bands. “That’s why it’s nice to have Adventures: We have a whole separate outlet for that side of our interests.” Some of those ’90s influences do bleed into both bands — that last Code Orange record had moments that sounded like The Jesus and Mary Chain and Smashing

ADVENTURES

WITH WHIRR, GIVE, RUN FOREVER, SWINGERS CLUB 7 p.m. Tue., April 7. The Mr. Roboto Project, 5106 Penn Ave., Bloomfield. $10. www.therobotoproject.org

Pumpkins. “It’s the same people, so even if it’s not [in] the actual music ... the ideas of, like, shoegaze bands come into Code Orange,” Meyers admits. But, she adds, “If it all starts to blend together, then it just becomes confusing.” The separation, unsurprisingly, shows up in performance as well. While Meyers,

for one, rocks out with an air of unyielding, firmly planted confidence in the more muscular Code Orange, her presence in Adventures, while still lively, is suggestive of how she comes across in conversation: unassuming but direct, poised and a little stoic. The rest of the band members show a similar adaptable self-assurance, which is easy to attribute to the fact that, while none of them is over 22, they’ve been at this for while. Code Orange (or Code Orange Kids, as they have been known in the past) came together in ninth grade. Meyers, drummer Jami Morgan and bassist Joe Goldman (along with guitarist Eric Balderose) started out playing street punk, eventually progressing to hardcore, thanks to the influence of other, older bands in the Pittsburgh punk and hardcore scene. As they gained momentum — around the end of high school — the members began developing Adventures as a separate outlet. “Originally, it was us four, pretty much,” recalls Meyers. “We had a bunch of CONTINUES ON PG. 32


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Ballroom Dance |Aerial Silks |Circus Class |Fitness

WE KNOW e k i e L c Dan s

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musical interests and were starting to get into indie and emo and stuff like that.” In this case, too, older friends introduced the members to new, older music: Meyers cites Mineral, Archers of Loaf and Dinosaur Jr. as influences. Meyers, Morgan and Goldman were joined by singer/keyboardist Kimi Hanauer and guitarist Dominic Landolina, forming Adventures. The addition of Hanauer was particularly key. “She’s been our best friend from the beginning, we’ve always been really close,” Meyers says. Hanauer — who takes care of all of the band’s artwork — is currently in art school in Baltimore, which sometimes makes things logistically complex (Landolina is also currently in school, but a little closer, at Point Park University). “With the new LP, [Hanauer] happened to be here at the time we were writing it, so we wrote a lot more together. We’re really good at playing vocal stuff off of each other; I think we work really well together.” Each band scratches a different musical itch for listeners and band members alike: “Code Orange is all the aggression and it gets a lot weirder … we’re able to experiment with a lot more,” Meyers says. “The [hardcore] community that Code Orange is in is super important to me and to all of us. It’s where we feel we can fit.” Code Orange takes precedence over Adventures, when it comes to scheduling, but — though the hardcore scene is where Meyers’ heart is — she’d hate to pick between the two. “I personally really enjoy writing [music in Adventures]. In a way it’s a little easier, because the songs are classically structured in a rock sense. It’s just more fun that way.” And though Code Orange is the betterknown band, Adventures is catching up. After releasing a couple of 7-inches on No Sleep Records, the band decided to put Supersonic Home out on Run for Cover Records, which is also home to bands like Mewithoutyou and Whirr. “No Sleep has been really nice and cool to us, we kind of just wanted to step it up a little bit,” Meyers says. “[Run for Cover has] a whole way of doing it that kids really connect to, with videos and stuff like that. They seem to get it.” Aside from that kind of savvy label support, Meyer’s attributes Adventures’ growing fan base to the fact that many listeners find the music nostalgic, and just as many relate to the record’s abundant (but never overpowering) angst. But appealing to a wider audience is still, at least a little bit, beside the point. “It’s really cool to see kids, people from the Internet, our friends, Kimi’s friends from the art world. When people show up, it’s like, ‘This is awesome, this is super cool,’” Meyers says, “[But] to me, it still always feels like playing music with my friends.” MWE L SH @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

NEW RELEASES

COLD WEATHER WHEN WAKING SELF-RELEASED COLDWEATHER.BANDCAMP.COM

Sometimes when a new band reminds you of another artist, it feels kind of pointless. Why not just listen to the “real” thing? But sometimes, when done just right, it makes you grateful that someone out there is making music so reminiscent of the stuff you already love. In the case of these Elliot Smith (near) sound-alikes, the latter is true. The first full-length by the trio Cold Weather — singersongwriter-guitarist Mark Ramsey, bassist Sarah Lacy and drummer Alex Platz — When Waking is a lovely, affecting collection, delicately produced by Jake Hanner of Donora. Well worth a listen. BY MARGARET WELSH

SHAD ALI THE SPEAQUINOX SELF-RELEASED SOUNDCLOUD.COM/ SHAD_ALI

This new record by MC Shad Ali, a Wilkinsburg native, is perfect for listeners in search of a mature hip-hop sound. The album has an East Coast feel, with content that reflects strong Pittsburgh roots. A range of producers — including Chuck Yayger and J Card — help to create the perfect backdrop for Ali’s poetic lyrical style: Lyrics such as “Stimulate unzip a file / minutes and seconds don’t measure ours / I was early, spent my life waiting wild young and free” will definitely garner a second listen. Songs like “Outside of Me” show Ali’s ability to be subjective regarding his life and circumstances, while other songs, such as “You’re Responsible,” highlight how he’s able to be objective without being preachy. BY JEREMIAH DAVIS


Secret Keeper: Mary Halvorson and Stephan Crump

{PHOTO COURTESY OF GUS POWELL}

NOTES OF APPRECIATION {BY MIKE SHANLEY} THE MONTH OF April was declared Jazz Appreciation Month nearly 14 years ago by the Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History, with the help of musician/producer Quincy Jones. In the ensuing years, the designation has stirred up some healthy debate: Does a mere 30 days reduce this gratitude to lip service? What part of jazz are we appreciating — the classics that paved the way, or the current players who are still expanding the tradition? In a remarkable display of synchronicity, this April includes visits from national acts that know the traditions and refused to be limited to them. Pianist Matthew Shipp, who comes to the First Unitarian Church on April 1, combines classical skills with avant-garde jazz, lyricism and a bold attitude. Known for speaking bluntly, Shipp says that too often the music looks back instead of looking forward. “All jazz needs to be organic,” he explains. “And by organic I mean, just let people do what they do, whether it’s straight ahead or avant-garde.” On April 7, City of Asylum presents a performance by Secret Keeper, the duo of guitarist Mary Halvorson and bassist Stephan Crump. The epitome of busy New York musicians, both lay claim to a long list of projects and accolades. The improvisations that made up Secret Keeper’s Super 8 album are notable for both their brevity and deep communication. Crump “came to a gig that I did and introduced himself,” Halvorson says. “He said, ‘We should get together and play,’ which is something musicians always say and usu-

ally doesn’t really happen. But in this case, we followed up on it and that’s when we recorded that first record.” Their new album, Emerge, features compositions by both musicians, which they’ll integrate in performance with improvisation. Geri Allen is an alum of the University of Pittsburgh, where she now serves as director of jazz studies. Her band Timeline, appearing on April 11 at the Kelly-Strayhorn Theater, should impress with the addition of tap dancer Maurice Chestnut to the rhythm section. But things will get pushed up a notch with the addition of saxophonist JD Allen. The tenor player can unleash a flow of ideas that seems to channel the vision of John Coltrane, coupled with the groove that Allen heard growing up in Detroit. MATTHEW SHIP & MICHAEL BISIO. 7:30 p.m. $16-20. 412-682-0591

SECRET KEEPER. 7 p.m. Sold out, call to be added to waitlist. 412-323-0278

GERI ALLEN & TIMELINE. 8 p.m., $30. www.kelly-strayhorn.org

AFRO-ASIAN MUSIC ENSEMBLE. 7:30 p.m. $16-20. 412-682-0591

In his lifetime, saxophonist Fred Ho was a dynamic personality, fueled equally by politics and music. He considered the word “jazz” derogatory, but combined the influence of Charles Mingus with Asian folk music, leaving room for covers of cartoon themes and Michael Jackson hits. Ho died from cancer last year, but his music lives on with the Afro-Asian Music Ensemble, which performs on April 23 at First Unitarian Church. These are just a few of the things happening not only this month, but in a season that’s already been ripe for improvised music in the Steel City. While the appreciation can extend beyond April, this is a good place to begin. I N F O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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April 11, 2015 12 pm - 4 pm DROP OFF LOCATION: Bakery Square Anthropologie Wildlife Center 6000 Verona Rd, Verona, PA 15147 WWW.ANIMALRESCUE.ORG 412.345.7300, EXT. 500

CRITICS’ PICKS LIVE MUSIC RADICAL TRIVIA TUESDAYS FREE WINGS & KARAOKE WEDNESDAYS DJ’S THURSDAYS & FRIDAYS BRAINBUZZER TRIVIA SUNDAYS GO BUCCOS SPECIALS!

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1020 Washington Pike Bridgeville 412.221.7808 31sportsbargrille.com

{PHOTO COURTESY OF ANGEL CEBAL LOS}

Protomartyr

[HIP HOP] + SAT., APRIL 04 After a tumultuous couple of weeks with Sony, we can retroactively assume that Earl Sweatshirt’s “Not Ready 2 Leave” tour subtitle didn’t have anything to do with the relationship with his record label. Sony didn’t exactly stick the landing with I Don’t Like Shit, I Don’t Go Outside’s rollout, posting an album title and release date where there should have just been a music video. Earl wasn’t happy, but we have his second record all the same. It’s even more dark, drawn-out and deliberate than Doris. He performs at Mr. Small’s with Remy Banks and Vince Staples, who turned in the promising Hell Can Wait EP last year. Shawn Cooke 8 p.m. 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale. $25. 412-821-4447 or www.mrsmalls.com

[HIP HOP] + SAT., APRIL 04 Curren$y doesn’t make grand statements — he’s a “weed rapper” and never tries to Earl transcend that Sweatshirt subgenre. His songs have similar urgency to a game of solitaire. However, the unveiling of his next album, Pilot Talk , has all the opulence of a Jay Z box set and the tech savvy of a 21st-century Wu Tang release. (It’s a $100 USB bundle with a T-shirt and Pilot Talk 3 look book — and you can’t download it on iTunes.) Lead single “Alert” indicates that his winning formula hasn’t changed a bit, even if the packaging’s new. Curren$y plays Altar Bar tonight with Corner Boy, Palermo Stone and Norman Dean. SC 9 p.m. 1620 Penn

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

Ave., Strip District. $25-28. 412-206-9719 or www.thealtarbar.com

[PUNK] + WED., APRIL 08 Like some of last year’s most thrilling punk records (Perfect Pussy’s Say Yes to Love, White Lung’s Deep Fantasy), Single Mothers’ Negative Qualities is an exercise in exhausting brevity. It’s only a 10-song, 23-minute LP, but it hits hard. Vocalist Drew Thomson screams his way through blistering post-hardcore that takes aim at bookish college snobs, religion and anyone who’s full of shit. And if that isn’t punk enough for you, see the website’s welcome note: “Single Mothers broke up in 2009 — and have been playing shows ever since.” The band plays a show at Club Café tonight with Edhochuli and Killing Thing. SC 8 p.m. 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $8-10. 412-431-4950 or www.clubcafelive.com {PHOTO COURTESY OF BRICK STOWELL}

Animal Rescue League 15th Annual Wildlife Baby Shower Fundraiser

[POST-PUNK] + WED., APRIL 08 Protomartyr’s battleready songs pack brute force, and yet the band rarely seems to take itself seriously. For instance, it announced the completion of its new album with a Facebook photo with the caption, “Horseshit artsy photo as tenuous evidence we are done recording the third album.” It will likely come to us a little more than a year after the band’s excellent Under Color of Official Right, which was equally pummeling, nasty and perceptive. Pittsburgh punk exports The Gotobeds open for Protomartyr tonight at Gooski’s. SC 9 p.m. 3117 Brereton St., Polish Hill. 412-681-1658


TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS

412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X165 (PHONE)

{ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

ROCK/POP THU 02 BENEDUM CENTER. alt-J, Tycho. Downtown. 412-456-6666. CLUB CAFE. KOPECKY w/ Essential Machine. South Side. 866-468-3401. HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. Sex Snobs, Night Vapor, Bat Zuppel, Geriatrics. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Delicate Steve, Andre Costello & The Cool Minors. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

FRI 03 BIG MIKE’S TAVERN. Ridgemont High 80’s. Etna. 412-784-1940. THE CENTER OF HARMONY. Jeff Campbell & Megan Slankard. Harmony. 570-294-6450. CLUB CAFE. December Boys: Big Star Tribute. South Side. 866-468-3401. GOOSKI’S. Outsideinside, Old Indian, Lost Realms. Polish Hill. 412-681-1658. LEVEL 20 SPORTS LOUNGE. Antz Marching (Dave Matthews Band Tribute). Bethel Park. 412-595-7953.

MEADOWS CASINO. Stee Band. Washington. 724-503-1200. MOONDOG’S. Code Whiskey. Blawnox. 412-828-2040. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Chop Shop. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

MOONDOG’S. M.O.T.O, w/ Bottle Rat, Playoff Beard, Danger Signs, Shapes of Things. Blawnox. 412-828-2040. THE R BAR. The Dave Iglar Band. Dormont. 412-942-0882. REX THEATER. Tropidelic w/ Stationary Pebbles, Wine & Spirit. South Side. 412-381-6811. 31ST STREET PUB. October SMILING MOOSE. 31, Curseborn, Dreadeth, Leprosy, PMP, Nazgul, Cant. Strip District. Horrid Ordeal. South 412-391-8334. Side. 412-431-4668. BENEDUM CENTER. STAGE AE. Big Data Pittsburgh Rockin’ www. per a p w/ On & On, Chappo. Reunion. Feat. Lou pghcitym o .c North Side. 412-229-5483. Christie, Jimmy THUNDERBIRD Beaumont & the Skyliners, CAFE. Randy Baumann’s Donnie Iris, Chuck Blasko’s Thunderbird Ramble. Vogues, The Marcels & Jimmie Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177. Ross & the Jaggerz. Downtown. THE VALLEY HOTEL. Big Gypsy. 412-471-6930. Jefferson Boro. 412-233-9800. CLUB CAFE. Christopher Mark WINTZELL’S OYSTER HOUSE. Jones w/ Alexander Stanton Shot O’ Soul. West Mifflin. (Early). The Getaway w/ JontiTrot 412-651-8992. (Late). South Side. 412-431-4950. DOWNEY’S HOUSE. The RPGs. Robinson. 412-489-5631. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Askultura. HARVEY WILNER’S. The Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177. Woo Hoo Band. West Mifflin. 412-466-1331. JERGEL’S RHYTHM GRILLE. ALTAR BAR. Ryan Cabrera, Pure Prairie League. Secondhand Serenade, Nick Warrendale. 724-799-8333. Thomas, Wind In Sails, Runaway Saints. Strip District. 412-206-9719. CARNEGIE LIBRARY OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL. Zappa Plays Zappa. Homestead. 412-462-3444. MR. SMALLS THEATER. Coal Chamber, Filter, Combichrist, American Head Charge, Saint Ridley. Millvale. 412-821-4447.

SAT 04

FULL LIST ONLINE

SUN 05

MON 06

MP 3 MONDAY

{PHOTO COURTESY OF MATT DAYAK}

COLD WEATHER

Each week, we bring you a new track from a local artist. This week’s song comes from Cold Weather, which released its new record, When Waking, on March 20. Stream or download the title track for free on FFW>>, our music blog at pghcitypaper.com.

TUE 07 CITY OF ASYLUM. Secret Keeper. North Side. 412-323-0278. CLUB CAFE. Feufollet w/ The Black Little Birds. South Side. 412-431-4950. GOOSKI’S. Axis: Sova, Come Holy Spirit, Boys. Polish Hill. 412-681-1658. THE MR. ROBOTO PROJECT. Whirr, Adventures. Bloomfield. 412-345-1059. MR. SMALLS THEATER. Alesana, Capture The Crown, The Browning, Conquer Divide, The Funeral Portrait. Millvale. 412-821-4447. PITTSBURGH WINERY. The Last Bison. Strip District. 412-566-1000.

WED 08 ALTAR BAR. Tribal Seeds, The Movement, Leilani Wolfgramm. Strip District. 412-263-2877. CLUB CAFE. Single Mothers, Killing Thing, Edhochuli. South Side. 866-468-3401. CONTINUES ON PG. 36

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CONCERTS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 35

EARLY WARNING

GOOSKI’S. Protomartyr & The Gotobeds. Polish Hill. 412-681-1658.

THU 02 ALLEGHENY WINE MIXER. J. Malls, Deus, Gordy G., DJ SIMI. Lawrenceville. 412-252-2337. BELVEDERE’S. Neon w/ DJ hatesyou. 80s Night. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555. CLUB TABOO. DJ Matt & Gangsta Shak. Homewood. 412-969-0260.

DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Mike & Frank. Robinson. 412-489-5631. ELWOOD’S PUB. West Deer Bluegrass Review. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181. SEVICHE. Jason Kendall Duo. Downtown. 412-697-3120.

FRI 03 ELWOOD’S PUB. Doc & Tina. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181.

FRI 03

April 11, 2015 12 pm - 4 pm DROP OFF LOCATION: Galleria of Mt. Lebanon 1500 Washington Road

Wildlife Center 6000 Verona Rd, Verona, PA 15147 WWW.ANIMALRESCUE.ORG 412.345.7300, EXT. 500

BRILLOBOX. Pandemic w/ Dan Dabber. Bloomfield. 412-621-4900. ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. Downtown. 412-874-4582. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. South Side. 412-381-1330.

SAT 04 OLIVE OR TWIST. The Vagrants. Downtown. 412-255-0525.

Neko Case

WED 08 The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust has announced the musical lineup for the 2015 Dollar Bank Three River’s Arts Festival, happening June 5-14. Check out the lineup of free concerts below, and mark your calendars!

SAT 04 CATTIVO. Illusions. w/ Funerals & Arvin Clay. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157. DIESEL. DJ CK. South Side. 412-431-8800. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. S BAR. Pete Butta. South Side. 412-481-7227.

FRI., JUNE 05 — Jenny

Lewis SAT., JUNE 06 — Railroad Earth, Elephant Revival SUN., JUNE 07 — Alvvays MON., JUNE 08 —– Pittsburgh Symphony Orchestra/Pittsburgh Opera TUE., JUNE 09 — The Felice Brothers with Hurray for the Riff Raff WED., JUNE 10 — Milo Greene THU., JUNE 11 — Rhiannon Giddens FRI., JUNE 12 — Richard Thompson SAT., JUNE 13 — Neko Case SUN., JUNE14 — Benjamin Booker

SUN 05 BRILLOBOX. DJ Futurism & DJ Fate. Bloomfield. 412-621-4900.

WED 08 SPOON. Spoon Fed. East Liberty. 412-362-6001.

HIP HOP/R&B THU 02 ALTAR BAR. Jarren Benton w/ Bilderburgh, TyMatts & Tweet. Strip District. 412-206-9719.

FRI 03 MR. SMALLS THEATER. 54th Regiment w/ R.A.D., Dutch, Jon Scott, D-Lane, Shortfuze & DJ Afterthought. Millvale. 412-821-4447.

OTTO’S PUB. Anderson-Vosel. Canonsburg. 724-745-2695.

JAZZ THU 02

SAT 04 MR. SMALLS THEATER. Earl Sweatshirt w/ Remy Banks, Vince Staples. Millvale. 412-821-4447.

BLUES FRI 03

pape pghcitym .co

SAT 04 BULGARIAN-MACEDONIAN NATIONAL EDUCATION AND CULTURAL CENTER. Gringo Zydeco. West Homestead. 412-461-6188.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

GIANNA VIA’S RESTAURANT & BAR. RML Jazz. Overbrook. 412-370-9621. TENDER BAR + KITCHEN. Tom Roberts. Lawrenceville. 412-402-9522. www. r

FULL LIST ONLINE

THE DOUBLE L. Still Not Sober. Millvale. 412-821-2647. SHELBY’S STATION. Anderson-Vosel. Bridgeville. 412-319-7938.

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DJS

{PHOTO COURTESY OF NEKO CASE}

Animal Rescue League 15th Annual Wildlife Baby Shower Fundraiser

FRI 03

NOLA ON THE SQUARE. John Gresh’s Gris Gris. Downtown. 412-471-9100.

SAT 04 CIOPPINO SEAFOOD CHOPHOUSE BAR. Roger Barbour Jazz Quartet. Strip District. 412-281-6593. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. The Satin Hearts. Downtown. 412-471-9100.

OAKS THEATER. Etta Cox Band. Oakmont. 412-828-6311. PENN HILLS LIBRARY. Frank Cunimondo. Penn Hills. 412-795-3507.

SUN 05 OMNI WILLIAM PENN. Frank Cunimondo & Pat Crossly. Downtown. 724-226-1976.

MON 06 ECLIPSE LOUNGE. Open Jazz Night w/ the Howie Alexander Trio. Lawrenceville. 412-251-0097.

TUE 07

ALLEGHENY ELKS LODGE #339. Pittsburgh Banjo Club. Wednesdays. North Side. 412-321-1834.

REGGAE FRI 03 CAPRI PIZZA AND BAR. Bombo Claat w/ VYBZ Machine Intl Sound System. East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

COUNTRY FRI 03 BLOOMFIELD BRIDGE TAVERN. Slim Forsythe, Allegheny Rhythm Rangers, Braddock Brothers, Bryan McQuaid. Bloomfield. 412-682-8611.

SAT 04 MEADOWS CASINO. Chris Higbee. Washington. 724-503-1200.

CLASSICAL FRI 03 SHADYSIDE PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH CHANCEL CHOIR. Performing Egil Hovland’s “Agnus Dei” w/ bassoonist Linda Morton Fisher, punctuated by readings. Shadyside Presbyterian Church, Shadyside. 412-682-4300.

MON 06 STEPHEN WAARTS, VIOLINIST. Rodef Shalom Congregation, Oakland. 412-621-6566.

OTHER MUSIC FRI 03 ROCK ROOM. Rockaraoke. Polish Hill. 412-683-4418.

TUE 07

THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Descarga en Espacio conjunto. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

TENDER BAR + KITCHEN. Art Lindsay & Mike Siciliano. Bluegrass night. Lawrenceville. 412-402-9522.

WED 08

WED 08

NOLA ON THE SQUARE. RML Jazz. Downtown. 412-471-9100.

REX THEATER. The Wood Brothers, Willie Watson. South Side. 412-381-6811.


What to do April

IN PITTSBURGH

1-7

WEDNESDAY 1

Dreamers/The Kickback SMILING MOOSE South Side. 412-431-4668. All Ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 6:30p.m.

American Opera

THE PITTSBURGH WINERY Strip District. 412-566-1000. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 9p.m.

Laser Background, The Neffs & Big Gypsy CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950 Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

THURSDAY 25 Jarren Benton - "The Slow Motion Tour." ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412-263-2877. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

The Peking Acrobats

BYHAM THEATER Downtown. 412-456-666. Tickets: trustarts.org or 412-471-6930. 7:30p.m.

Kopecky

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show.

PAID ADVERTORIAL SPONSORED BY

Dirty Dancing

Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone or 866-468-3401. 6:20p.m.

APRIL 7-12 BENEDUM CENTER

Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

The Moody Blues

alt-J

HEINZ HALL Downtown. 412-392-4900. Tickets: heinzhall.org 7:30p.m.

BENEDUM CENTER Downtown. 412-456-6666. Tickets: trustarts.org. 8p.m.

TUESDAY 7

Delicate Steve w/ Andre Costello & the Cool Minors

The Last Bison

THE PITTSBURGH WINERY Strip District. 412-566-1000 Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

THUNDERBIRD CAFE Lawrenceville. Over 21 show. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 9p.m.

FRIDAY 36

Feufollet

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

Comedian Jody Kerns (As seen on TNN) LATITUDE 360 Robinson Twp. 412-693-5555.Tickets: latitude360.com/pittsburgh-pa. Through April 4.

Alesana

SAMUEL PERGANDE (JOHNNY), JILLIAN MUELLER (BABY) AND JENNY WINTON (PENNY) IN THE NORTH AMERICAN TOUR OF DIRTY DANCING – THE CLASSIC STORY ON STAGE. (PHOTO BY MATTHEW MURPHY).

Earl Sweatshirt

SATURDAY 47

MR SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-821-4447. All ages show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone or 866-468-3401. 8p.m

Curren$y

ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412-263-2877. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 9p.m. EDUCATION STUDIO - ANDY WARHOL MUSEUM North Side. 412-237-8300. Tickets: free with museum entrance. 10a.m.

Dweezil Zappa Guitar Masterclass - Dweezilla on the Road

ZAPPA PLAYS ZAPPA "Accept No Substitutes" Dirty Dancing

SUNDAY 58

CARNEGIE OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL Munhall. 412-462-3444. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 3p.m.

BYHAM THEATER Downtown. 412-456-6666. Tickets: ventureoutdoors.org/events. 5p.m.

Radio Revival Tour Coal Chamber featuring Secondhand Serenade & Ryan Cabrera MR SMALLS THEATRE Millvale.

Banff Mountain Film Festival World Tour

Half Pint Prints

MONDAY 6

MR SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-821-4447. All ages show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone or 866-468-3401. 6:30p.m.

412-263-2877. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 6:30p.m.

CARNEGIE OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL Munhall. 412-462-3444. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

Tia Fuller Quartet

CABARET AT THEATER SQUARE Downtown. 412-456-6666. Tickets: trustarts.org. 8p.m.

412-821-4447. All ages show.

ALTAR BAR Strip District.

BENEDUM CENTER Downtown. 412-456-4800. Tickets: trustarts.org. Through April 12.

YOU CAN

Now on

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“I’VE LEARNED OF UNTOLD RICHES HIDDEN DEEP IN THE AMERICAS.”

DOIN’ TIME {BY AL HOFF} In Etan Cohen’s misguided comedy Get Hard, a rich white jerk (Will Ferrell) asks the only black guy he knows (Kevin Hart) to train him for an upcoming prison sentence. I expected plenty of lazy jokes based on racial stereotypes, and there they were. And just because the film acknowledges its own lazy stereotyping doesn’t absolve it from being crass and offensive.

ESCAPE ROUTE

Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart

Then there’s the barrage of explicit jokes about men having sex with men in prison. It’s portrayed, simultaneously, as the worst thing ever, and the funniest thing ever. When Ferrell tells Hart he’s going to prison, Hart launches into a rant about the variety of forced “ass-pounding” Ferrell can expect. (The term “rape” is never used, because what could possibly be funny about being raped? Imagine a movie making this many jokes about women being raped.) The homophobic panic level in Get Hard (no, really, in a bromance named after an erection) is off the charts, and winds up being an uncomfortable reveal into the stagnant, creatively bereft minds of the dudes making this film. AHOFF@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

The Battered Bastards of Baseball Available from Netflix, this is a laugh-outloud and informative documentary about independent the Portland Mavericks, an ind Class A baseball team created create by Bing Russell (father of actor Kurt, who helps narrate). The rag-tag team was like a real-life Bad News (one player Bears (o was an actual dog), but the club’s anarchic sense of fun — and surprisingly good on-field performance — made the Mavs beloved by fans during its short time on this earth (1973-77). Random highlights include: wild polyester clothing, flaming brooms, and the invention of Big League Chew bubblegum. (Al Hoff)

Kumiko (Rinko Kikuchi) is Fargo-bound.

{BY AL HOFF}

W

E ALL USE movies as a temporary

escape from our own realities. But what if a movie offered an actual escape — the chance to transform a trapped existence into an open frontier of endless possibilities? That’s the premise of the offbeat melancholic study Kumiko, the Treasure Hunter, written and directed by brothers David and Nathan Zellner. Depressed 29-year-old Kumiko (Rinko Kikuchi) lives in a cluttered and cramped Tokyo apartment, with only her rabbit Bunzo for company. She performs poorly at her job as an “office lady,” and is socially awkward. But, buried at the beach, she discovers a VHS copy of the 1996 Coen brothers’ film Fargo. Through repeated playbacks, Kumiko fixates on the money that Steve Buscemi’s character buries in the snow. Believing that it is still there, waiting to be unearthed, she makes a treasure map (actually an exquisite piece of folk-art embroidery) and sets out for North Dakota to find it. “I am like a Spanish conquistador,”

she tells a befuddled security guard at the Tokyo library. “Recently, I’ve learned of untold riches hidden deep in the Americas.” Dressed in a bright-red, oversized hoodie, Kumiko recalls the famous fairy tale, with its own naïve traveler who finds unexpected danger.

KUMIKO, THE TREASURE HUNTER DIRECTED BY: David and Nathan Zellner STARRING: Rinko Kikuchi In English, and Japanese, with subtitles Starts Fri., April 1. Hollywood

CP APPROVED The film’s second half charts Kumiko’s journey through wintry Minnesota, where she is unprepared for the harsh weather (eventually resorting to an improvised poncho made from a motel bedspread) and the open kindness of small-town Midwesterners. There are glimmers of fish-out-of-water humor, but the urgency of Kumiko’s

quixotic quest underscores the sadness and desperation fueling her delusion. Each step in the snow is step away from her miserable life in Japan, but just as likely another step closer to tragedy, however exhilarating the exploration. The endlessly open spaces of Minnesota — where the snow-covered fields blend seamlessly into the pale grey sky — offer Kumiko only the riches of freedom and possibility, but even this — like the buried cash — is an illusion. The story draws inspiration from an urban legend that sprung up in 2001 after a young Japanese woman was mysteriously found frozen to death in rural Minnesota. But mostly this slender sad tale is fully realized by Kikuchi (Pacific Rim, Babel). It’s a role with little dialogue, yet Kikuchi makes Kumiko’s depression and repressed anger palpable, her quiet madness relatable and even thrilling. There is no “Fargo” — films are fake, the kindly Minnesota sheriff tells her — but Kumiko recognizes an escape, even if it’s hiding in the dreamscape of a movie. A H OF F @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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FILM CAPSULES CP

–Ronnie Scheib, VARIETY

= CITY PAPER APPROVED

COMPELLING . An aesthetic experience as

NEW THIS WEEK BALLET 422. This new documentary from Jody Lee Lipes tracks the development of a new short ballet piece for the New York City Ballet. Lipes adopts the style of Frederick Wiseman, assembling the work from fly-onthe-wall footage shot throughout the creation process. (Intertitles help explain some of the ballet company’s structure and personnel.) Thus, we see 25-year-old dancer/choreographer Justin Peck working with his principal dancers, coordinating with superiors and wearily traveling home on the subway. Costumers confer with dancers over fabrics; the in-house orchestra practices; the lighting team sets up their board; and there are many, many rehearsals. It’s always interesting to see the creative process at work — particularly of a team — though those unfamiliar with ballet might wish for additional explanation. But for fans of ballet, this intimate work offers unprecedented access. Starts Fri., April 3. Harris (Al Hoff)

much as an intellectual one. More visually sumptuous than most narratives you’ll see this year.”

CP

Marty Jackitansky (Joshua CP BUZZARD. Burge) might seem like a caricature: a slovenly heavy-metal and horror-movie fan who eats disgusting junk food and barely punches the clock at his temp job at a mortgage company somewhere in the featureless Midwest. His most treasured possession is a Freddy Krugerlike videogame glove that he has retrofitted with knifes. But Marty has real existential problems, most of them rooted in anger, paranoia and lack of cash. And despite being a slacker, Marty displays a surprising amount of creativity, moxie and flair for surviving on thin margins. The film’s cold open, in which Marty closes his checking account, is an awesome exercise in petty scamming. But after Marty steals some checks from work, things spiral out of control, eventually forcing him to go on the run. This dark indie comedy is written and directed by Joel Potrykus, who also co-stars as Marty’s not-so-cool nerdy co-worker and sometime roommate. Buzzard walks a fine line, depicting Marty as both an unpredictable angry monster and a sympathetic lost boy of sorts. Burge, who has a fantastic “blank” face capable of silently conveying many emotions, does good work bringing Marty to life. They don’t give out awards for this kind of stuff, but if ever there were one for “epic single-take spaghetti-eating scene,” Buzzard is a lock. Starts Fri., April 3. Row House (AH) CHAMPS. This new documentary from Bert Marcus looks at the sport of boxing and how, though it can serve as a ladder up from poverty, it’s often a rough path to the American Dream. There are also tremendous personal costs once boxers gain — and often — lose success. Among those profiled are Mike Tyson, Evander Holyfield and Bernard Hopkins. 6:45 p.m. Thu., April 2; 8:15 p.m. Fri., April 3; and 4:30 and 6:30 p.m. Sat., April 4. Parkway, McKees Rocks FURIOUS 7. The fast cars — and the goodlooking people who drive them — are back, seeking revenge for the events of Fast & Furious 6. Also, Somalian terrorists and a computer program called God’s Eye that can turn any device into a weapon. But mostly, fast cars. James Wan directs. Starts Fri., April 3.

EXHILARATING.”

-Zachary Wigon, VILLAGE VOICE

Ballet 422 Northern Ireland. His first foray goes badly, when a street riot turns deadly and Hook is separated from his unit and left to survive the night in republican territory. Yann Demange’s debut feature is a gritty 90-minute thriller set on a single chaotic night. Despite the specificity of its setting and time, it’s essentially a lost-in-dangerous-territory set-up familiar from Western, war and crime films. Mostly, Hook is forced to react to the rapidly changing events around him, which include internecine struggles within the local paramilitary group, with the complication of undercover British forces complicit in corruption and collusion. The stuck-behind-enemy-lines part is an easier sell than the political drama, which might be confusing to those unfamiliar with this specific history and its nuances. Also getting a bit lost in the storytelling is ’71’s larger theme about the role of the soldier as a disposable pawn in ill-defined mission with an unclear chain of command. But this is a gripping outing, with O’Connell (last seen suffering endlessly in Unbroken) managing a nearly dialoguefree role, and a break-out performance by Corey McKinley, as take-charge child loyalist. Starts Fri., April 3. Manor (AH)

Big Adventure (Burton’s 1985 debut, featuring Pee Wee Herman on a road trip), April 1. Mars Attacks! (1996 spoof of 1950s sci-fi films), April 1-2. Batman (the 1989 reboot, starring Michael Keaton), April 1-2. Wigle Whiskey Presents: Best In Show (Christopher Guest’s 2000 mockumentary about dog shows), 7:30 p.m. Thu., April 2. Work Sucks Series. Buzzard (new comedy about a temp; see review above), April 3-8. Clerks (Kevin Smith’s 1994 indie comedy about convenience-store workers), April 3-9. Being John Malkovich (Spike Jonze’s loopy 1999 comedy where a puppeteer ends up in John Malkovich’s mind), CONTINUES ON PG. 40

BALLET 422 An unprecedented look behind the curtain at the New York City Ballet featuring choreographer Justin Peck

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT STARTS

FRIDAY, APRIL 3 PITTSBURGH Pittsburgh Filmmakers Harris Theatre theaters.pittsburgharts.org

REPERTORY ROW HOUSE CINEMA. Tim Burton Films. Pee Wee’s

It Follows (2015) 4/1 @ 7:30pm, 4/2 @ 7:30pm, 4/3 @ 10:00pm, 4/4 @ 4:00pm & 7:00pm, 4/5 @ 7:00pm, 4/6 @ 9:30pm, 4/7 @ 7:00pm, 4/8 @ 9:30pm DO NOT miss this new indie horror flick that critics are raving about!

--------------------------------------

Kumiko The Treasure Hunter (2014)

4/3 @ 7:30pm, 4/4 @ 9:30pm, 4/5 @ 4:00pm, 4/6 @ 7:00pm, 4/7 @ 9:30pm, 4/8 @ 7:00pm A lonely Japanese woman is convinced a lost treasure she saw in a film is real, and travels to the frozen tundra of Minnesota to find it.

-Rocky - - - - - - Horror - - - - - - - -Picture - - - - - - - -Show --------------4/4 @ Midnight with live shadowcast by the JCCP!

In 1971, a young British soldier named CP ’71. Gary Hook (Jack O’Connell) is sent to patrol the increasingly violent streets of Belfast,

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FILM CAPSULES, CONTINUED FROM PG. 39

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LIMITED TIME OFFER! Champs April 3-9. Call or see website for times and complete listings. 4115 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $5-9. 412-9043225 or www.rowhousecinema.com THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST. Mel Gibson’s 2004 film follows Jesus (Jim Caviezel) through his final hours, from his crisis of faith in Gethsemane through his arrest, scourging and crucifixion. In the usual Hollywood way, The Passion substitutes giant music, bludgeoning sound effects and massive closeups for ideas and emotions. In Aramaic, Latin and Hebrew, with subtitles. 7:30 p.m. Wed., April 1. AMC Loews. $5 (Bill O’Driscoll) THE HOURGLASS SANITARIUM. Wojciech J. Has’ 1973 film is a dark comical allegorical work, in which a man visits his father in a decrepit sanitarium. Continues a two-month series of digitally remastered Polish masterpieces, curated by Martin Scorsese. In Polish, with subtitles. 7:30 p.m. Thu., April 2, and 5:30 p.m. Sat., April 4. Harris. $5

DANGEROUS ACTS. Madeleine Sackler’s sometimes harrowing 2013 documentary follows members of the Belarus Free Theatre struggling to make their politically minded underground art in the shadow of “the last dictatorship of Europe.” The story’s fulcrum is 2010’s violent crackdown on peaceful protests of rigged elections that again returned to power strongman Alexandr Lukashenko. The troupe’s leaders, including founders Natalia Koliada and Nikolai Khalezin, take refuge first in New York and later in the U.K., making theater all the while. The 75-minute film (assembled partly from smuggled footage) documents both head-busting riot cops and the troupe’s brilliant stagecraft, which makes the psychological reality of repression palpable. Screens as part of CMU’s Faces of Work festival. In Belarusian and Russian, with subtitles. 7:15 p.m. Thu., April 9. McConomy Auditorium, CMU campus, Oakland. www.cmu.edu/faces (BO)

CP

BANFF MOUNTAIN FILM FESTIVAL. Now that spring is threatening to break out, get fired up for outdoor adventuring, with this annual touring program of short films that celebrate: skiing, climbing, touring faraway places, saving the environment, biking, canoeing and so much more. 7 p.m. Sat., April 4, and 5 p.m. Sun., April 5. Byham Theater, Downtown. $1520; $100 VIP tickets. . trustarts.culturaldistrict.org THE PRINCESS BRIDE. Rob Reiner’s 1987 film is that rare bird — a film to delight children and adults alike, an upbeat fairy tale with romance, comedy, swordplay and deliciously quotable lines. (“Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”) And what a cast: Cary Elwes, Robin Wright Penn, Mandy Pantinkin, Billy Crystal, Peter Falk, Wallace Shawn, Christopher Guest and professional wrestler Andre the Giant. William Goldman wrote the clever script. 8 p.m. Sun., April 5. Regent Square (AH)

CP

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

10 MINUTES. Lee Yong-Seung’s recent drama depicts the life of an intern who dreams of a better job, and how any advancement plays out against a backdrop of office politics. Screens as part of Carnegie Mellon’s Faces of Work festival. In Korean, with subtitles. 7 p.m. Wed., April 8. McConomy Auditorium, CMU campus, Oakland. www.cmu.edu/faces HARRY POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS. It’s back to Hogwarts for Harry and his magical compatriots, despite a warning that terrible things are going to happen. Chris Columbus directs this 2002 film, starring Daniel Radcliffe. 7:30 p.m. Wed., April 8. AMC Loews. $5

Buzzard CAMOUFLAGE. Krysztof Zanussi’s 1976 film was banned by the Polish government, even though it was not overtly political. It’s an absurdist comedy, set on a university campus during the summer, and depicts the relationship between a young linguistics professor and his senior colleague. Continues a two-month series of digitally remastered Polish masterpieces, curated by Martin Scorsese. In Polish, with subtitles. 7:30 p.m. Thu., April 9, and 5:30 p.m. Sat., April 11. Harris. $5


[BOOKS]

COUNTRYSIDE

“THERE’S NO WIN AND NO FAIL.”

WHERE IS RURAL CHINA HEADED? We’re in a period of transition. Rural China is moving from family-held farming plots to corporate-managed agribusiness. Sort of going back to the consolidation of farms in the ’50s and ’60s into communes, but now that are run by a private business for profit, rather than by the government for sustenance. WHAT IS THE ACTUAL LANDSCAPE LIKE? The village is named Wasteland but looks nothing like a wasteland. It’s a flat, fertile floodplain that stretches out to foothills. It kind of looks like Northern California, like Sonoma county. WHAT SEEMS TO INTEREST READERS MOST ABOUT THE BOOK? Overall, I think readers are excited to go on a journey to a place they’ve never been before. Even for experienced China hands, this is a region of the country they don’t often get to see let alone live in, so that’s been the interest for the book mostly — an exploration of this hidden side of the country.

DAUNTLESS

INQUISITIVE,

WHAT DREW YOU TO RURAL CHINA, CONSIDERING THAT THE LAST DAYS OF OLD BEIJING WAS PRIMARILY AN URBAN BOOK? I think it’s time to write a book when the book you want to read doesn’t exist. After finishing the Beijing book, which was a book that didn’t exist, I wanted to know what was going on in the Chinese countryside, so I headed north to find out.

[ART REVIEW]

Michael Meyer’s In Manchuria: A Village Called Wasteland and the Transformation of Rural China is part memoir, part historical record and part travelogue; he calls it his “kitchensink book.” Meyer moved to China as an English teacher with the Peace Corps in 1995. While his novel The Last Days of Old Beijing focuses on the fate of neighborhoods prior to the 2008 Beijing Olympics, In Manchuria is a more personal account of Meyer’s time living in Wasteland, his wife’s childhood village, in northeastern China. Meyer, a creative nonfiction-writing professor at the University of Pittsburgh, documents the changes in rural China and how they have affected his own life. Meyer recently spoke with CP by phone from San Francisco, in the midst of a five-week book tour.

Terra cognita: Michael Meyer in China {PHOTO COURTESY OF THE AUTHOR}

{BY ZACCHIAUS MCKEE}

{IMAGE COURTESY OF CORITA ART CENTER, LOS ANGELES}

{BY NADINE WASSERMAN}

Corita Kent’s “E eye love” (1968)

“R

ULE 7: The only rule is work. If you work it will lead to something. It’s the people who do all of the work all the time who eventually catch on to things.” This rule, from a list entitled “Immaculate Heart College Art Department Rules,” is one of 10 compiled by the artist, activist and educator Corita Kent. Rule 7, in particular, captures the type of dedication that Kent gave to her own life’s work. It speaks to a disciplined curiosity that evolves from an inquisitive and dauntless life. Kent was a Sister of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, and was an alumna of Immaculate Heart College in Los Angeles, where she later taught in the art department from 1947 until she left the order, in 1968. Kent gained popularity in the 1960s and

’70s as a graphic artist. Her serigraphs, murals and other commissions combine spirituality and a commitment to social justice. Kent studied art history at the University of Southern California, and it was there that

SOMEDAY IS NOW: THE ART OF CORITA KENT continues through April 19. The Andy Warhol Museum, 117 Sandusky St., North Side. 412-237-8300 or www.warhol.org

she took a class in printmaking. As a populist medium, printmaking was historically used to disseminate ideas quickly and affordably. Like the German expressionists, WPA artists and Taller de Gráfica Popular

printmakers before her, Kent clearly understood the power of the medium to reach a large and diverse audience. She was drawn to it both aesthetically and practically, and many of her designs easily translated into posters, billboards, record-album jackets and, in 1985, a U.S. Postal Service Love stamp. While there have been many exhibitions of Kent’s work, Someday Is Now: The Art of Corita Kent, at The Andy Warhol Museum, is the first to cover her entire career, including her more introspective watercolors made in the final years of her life in New England. The exhibition is curated by Ian Berry, Dayton Director of The Frances Young Tang Teaching Museum and Art Gallery at Skidmore College, and Michael Duncan, an independent curator and art critic, in

INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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INQUISITIVE, DAUNTLESS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 41

The Dirty Ball #10 Saturday, S aturday, Ap April pri ri 11th, 2015 ril 415 Bingham Street in the Southside 8:00 p.m. - Midnight

Tickets on sale now! TICKETS: www.attacktheatre.com/TDB15 or call 1.888.71.TICKETS The Dirty Ball #10 is made possible in part by:

Attack Theatre’s Season 20 is made possible in part by:

www.smarterguys.com

The McKinney Charitable Foundation of the PNC Charitable Trusts

!02),%Vents 0-/ 4HUrsday/ !PrIL- 4HE)NSPIrE3PEAkers SerIESFEaturING Michael Slaby, Debra Lam, and Andrew Butcher Presented by THETHE'rEEN"UILDING !LLIANCE$OOrSOPENaT

0rOGRAMSTArts aT0- !DMISSION &2%% 0-/ 4HUrsday/ !PrIL - 4HE,IVINGrOOM#HrONIcles Featured Storyteller Paradise Gray - Hosted by Leslie “Ezra: Smith $OOrSOPENaT 0rOGRAMSTArts aT0fORANDoVer 0-/ FrIDAY!PrIL- Crossroads - An Oral History of Music in the Hill ,UNCHEONINcluded fORTHEfIrSTGUESTS $OOrSOPENaT !- 0rOGRAMSTArts aT.OON &2%% 0-/ Saturday/ !PrIL - Local Legends of Jazz 2, The Next Generation featurING#/,JAZZ#OMBOTHE.eXT'ENERaTION !,,3T!2"ANDWITH3PECIAL'UESTS 2ON(Orton -ILESJackson *ESSICA,EE -AGGIE*OHNSON JEVON2USHTON

!NQWENIQUE WINGfIELD and morE 0resented by JAZZSPACE+AUFMANN#ENTER

$OOrSOPENaT0- 0rOGRAMSTArts aT GENERALADMISSION For Info on events at the Kaufmann Center go to:

www.hillhouse.org or call 412.281.1026 *USTBLOCKSFROM#ONSOL#ENTERs#ENTRE!VE 0ITTSBURGH 0!

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

collaboration with the Corita Art Center, Los Angeles. It is divided into sections that follow a more-or-less linear timeline. Displayed salon-style, the sections begin with her early, more directly religious subject matter, and end with her watercolors. Dominated by religious iconography, some of her very earliest work intertwines text with biblical scenes and ďŹ gures. Starting with scripture, Kent later began to incorporate quotes from favorite writers such as e. e. cummings and Gertrude Stein. Other inuences, such as folk art and abstract expressionism, also began to show up in her early work. But in the 1960s, inspired by artists such as Warhol, Kent developed her own version of pop art by mixing bold numbers and letters, bright colors and provocative texts that were often written in a distinctive cursive. Rather than mere appropriations, Kent manipulated recognizable fonts and slogans from magazines, advertisements and signage. Symbols such as the Wonder Bread dots and the scripted General Mills “Gâ€? appear cropped, inverted, reframed and over-laid with texts and lyrics. The original meanings are subverted to serve her aesthetic goals as well as to deliver her humanist messages. As a teacher, Kent encouraged her students and others to experience the extraordinary in the ordinary. In 1966, she developed a technique whereby she would take a photograph, crumple it, re-photograph it, enlarge it and from that create a stencil in which the texts could warp and bend, rendering layers of meaning. As Kent’s imagery became more overtly political, her radicalism clashed with the diocese in Los Angeles. In 1968, she decided to leave the church and move to Boston, where she pursued her art full time until her death, in 1986. While many of the works in the exhibition deal with war, racism, poverty or death, they are not all gloomy. In fact, they are mostly bright and exuberant. “The Beatitudes,â€? a striking 40-foot banner commissioned for the Vatican pavilion for the 1964 World’s Fair in New York, features the word “happyâ€? in large letters several times. And two sets of alphabets displayed at the entrance to the exhibition add ash and wit. One uses vintage circus images, and the other borrows from sailing ags. Kent was clearly very proliďŹ c, and it’s difďŹ cult to take in the whole show all at once. In addition to her many prints, there are two ďŹ lms showing in a central space that also includes a hands-on activity area inspired by her teachings. If you feel a little overwhelmed, head over there. After all, Rule 6 states: “Nothing is a mistake. There’s no win and no fail. There’s only make.â€? INF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

[BOOK REVIEW]

AFTER-EFFECTS {BY FRED SHAW} Slag is waste left over from steelmaking. But a scholarly epigraph in Leslie Anne Mcilroy’s newest poetry collection, SLAG (Main Street Rag, $14), suggests a more personal parallel: “The long-term adverse effects of sexual abuse in infancy are the results of memories ‌ which in later years can be triggered by a host of cues that are pervasive.â€? The notion that trauma and its life-long after-effects can be made into something meaningful becomes an aesthetic Mcilroy heartily embraces. Full of complicated emotion and desire, SLAG’s 87 pages read as a work of honesty. Mcilroy, a Carnegie Mellon grad and local copywriter, co-founded the lit mag HEArt, dedicated to social justice. On that note, SLAG doesn’t pontificate, but shows her female speaker wrestling with relationships and motherhood, along with the emotional and physical fallout of abuse. While heavy themes can overwhelm, a range of moments play out in these well-developed lines. In “Punch Buggy,â€? Mcilroy describes a mother’s rickety VW Bug in detail: “The interior was peeling, / the smell almost wet, / and the drive to Toronto / cold without heat.â€? The tone matches a child-like speaker’s dread of the cramped beater when she writes of the rusty floorboards, “I wished it would give, / let me slip out and roll / away to the berm, / that little car and all its / stupid, eager / endurance, / headed north / without me.â€? It’s an interesting metaphor for its insight and accessibility. While several poems take place within the context of dreams, a favorite in the collection is the reflective “15 Years After The Cage,â€? which invokes the landmark Squirrel Hill CafĂŠ. Busy shifts being the provenance of stress dreams for many servers and bartenders, it was spot-on for its lucid surrealism: â€œâ€Ś [D]eath wasn’t like this. It was more like / opening the bar door at 5 a.m. to make / soup and finding your bartenders drunk / on the bar stools, a bottle of vodka / between them, tips divided, ketchup / bottles full and the cash bag delivered/ duly to the bank after close. It was more / like emptying the ashtray, pouring them / another and sending them home to sleep.â€? It’s a beautiful and haunting portrayal. With its frequent use of figurative language and a strong voice, SLAG succeeds by letting the reader consider human complexity in weighty and insightful ways. INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM


4.07 4.14 4.21

4.28

TIA FULLER QUARTET PAT MARTINO ORGAN TRIO 100 YEARS OF STRAYHORN: ALLAN HARRIS

WITH SPECIAL GUEST ERIC REED CO-PRESENTED BY BILLY STRAYHORN SONGS INC.

ROY AYERS UBIQUITY ALL SHOW START @ 8PM

THE JAZZ SCENE STARTS AT THE CABARET THEATER 655 PENN AVENUE, CULTURAL DISTRICT • TRUSTARTS.ORG • 412.456.6666

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YOU’LL HAVE THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE LIFE.

{PHOTO COURTESY OF JEFF SWENSEN}

Laurie Klatscher (left) and Cary Anne Spear in Endless Lawns, at The REP

[PLAY REVIEWS]

SISTER ACT {BY COLETTE NEWBY} ENDLESS LAWNS is about the twin daughters of a dead movie star. Since his death, one sister has developed professionally paralyzing alcoholism, while the other is in recovery from same. Neither dry Torch, anchoring the show as played by Laurie Klatscher, nor soaking-wet Flo (Cary Anne Spear) has ever moved past her childhood with a wealthy but cruel father. They live together in a dilapidated house, struggling over whether to pay the gas or electric bill this month. (Ignore that the show’s online synopsis focuses on the show’s male characters; the sisters are the center.)

ENDLESS LAWNS

OPENS NEXT WEEK! APRIL 7-12 • BENEDUM CENTER TRUSTARTS.ORG • BOX OFFICE AT THEATER SQUARE 412-456-4800 • GROUPS 10+ TICKETS 412-471-6930

US.DirtyDancingOnTour.com PNC Broadway Across America-Pittsburgh is a presentation of The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust, Pittsburgh Symphony and Broadway Across America.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

continues through April 12. Pittsburgh Playhouse, 222 Craft Ave., Oakland. $24. 412-392-8000 or pittsburghplayhouse.com

The world-premiere show was written by Anthony McKay, a professor of acting at Carnegie Mellon University’s School of Drama, and directed by Greg Lehane to take place in Pittsburgh Playhouse’s intimate studio space. It uses the close quarters to great effect for tension and movement, and I loved Stephanie Mayer-Staley’s scenic design for the back porch.

The title Endless Lawns instantly recalls the scathing indictments of suburban blandness we had in the ’90s. These descended from the British “angry young men” plays of the ’60s, which in turn followed from ideologically rigorous social realism, and ultimately from Chekhov, who is directly recalled in the show. Compared to the ’90s’ laughable stories of awful white kids realizing, to their shock, that money and happiness are distinct entities, the (still awfully white) cast of Endless Lawns is older and at least a little wiser. These characters have the self-awareness to acknowledge when the class commentary gets a little on-the-nose. This, I think, is thanks to the vital decision to make the sole representative of salt-of-the-earth working-class types, Jason McCune’s Ray, kind of a goon. They’re all goons, particularly Flo, who spends the whole show antagonizing everyone without being given much to redeem her, or to explain why her sister has had decades of patience for her — probably the show’s one weak point. Spear gave a remarkable performance, making her character’s abrasive personality almost likable. In some ways, that rough edge worked in this production’s favor. Indeed, this was the one show in maybe 10 where I couldn’t see the broad strokes of character arcs mapped out from their introductions. I’d forgotten how nice surprises can be. I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM


BROOKLYNITES {BY TED HOOVER} YOU CAN PRACTICALLY smell the kale chips

toasting in the next room. The married couple at the center of Carly Mensch’s 2013 play Oblivion (now at City Theatre) so aggressively, if not stereotypically, epitomizes the moneyed urban hip that it’s surprising they’re not sitting around their Park Slope home eating gluten-free lavash crackers while swilling fair-trade coffee lightened with non-GMO almond milk.

OBLIVION

continues through April 26. City Theatre, 1300 Bingham St., South Side. $15-61. 412-431-2489 or www.citytheatrecompany.org

He, Dixon, is a former high-powered attorney who, following a breakdown, sits at home smoking weed and working on a novel he’ll never finish. She, Pam, is a high-powered executive at HBO working through a rough parenting patch with their daughter, Julie. Both Dixon (Quentin Maré) and Pam (Lisa Velten Smith) are lapsed Jews, with Pam a bit more militant in her non-belief. The household is shaken somewhat when high schooler Julie (Julia

Warner) starts going to a Baptist church with her boyfriend (who — of course! — is filming a grainy, black-and-white silent documentary to get into NYU film school). Julie’s newfound faith upsets the family’s equilibrium, and some old scars are picked at slightly until — and this is hardly a spoiler — everyone returns to firmer emotional footing by the end. Oblivion has a lot going for it; I’m not immune to the charms of smart people saying witty things (because that’s something that has almost disappeared from the culture). But I am surprised that Mensch has managed to manufacture two acts out of such a slight problem. My atheism is considerably more militant than Pam’s, but, as a father myself, I can say that there are far, far worse things a kid can do than go to a church. City Theatre offers a lovely Pittsburghpremiere production of Mensch’s work. Smith, Maré, Warner and Christopher Larkin are a wonderful cast, directed with grace and intelligence by Stuart Carden. There’s a wonderful moment during one of the dust-ups when Pam, perched on the arm of the sofa, does a slow quarter-turn away from Dixon. It’s barely perceptible, but indicative of the understated yet razorsharp stagecraft on display.

APRIL 7 @ 8PM

Tia Fuller Quartet

THE JAZZ SCENE STARTS AT THE CABARET THEATER 655 PENN AVENUE, CULTURAL DISTRICT • TRUSTARTS.ORG • 412.456.6666

I NF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

an incubator for innovative thinking about the photographic image

This woman is silent, but is she speaking to you? “I can’t tell if she is laughing or smiling or if the expression on her face is severe. She looks like a bride, a lost Madonna, a millennial Mona Lisa with a landscape on her clothes and skin. She is a riddle, an enigma, a beauty…” That is writer Kaelen Wilson-Goldie’s response to Shirin Neshat’s striking self-portrait, Identified, 1995. What do you see in this picture? Is Neshat speaking to you through the silence of a photograph? Respond to our question with text, photos, videos, or audio files, and we'll feature your response on our website.

nowseethis.org Shirin Neshat, Identified, 1995 © Shirin Neshat. Photo: Cynthia Preston, Courtesy Gladstone Gallery, New York and Brussels

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FOR THE WEEK OF

04.0204.09.15

SPOTLIGHT of the WEEK

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO SUBMIT LISTINGS AND PRESS RELEASES, CALL 412.316.3342 X161.

Live Music Rick Matt

APRIL 04

Unholy h l S Smoke k — City of Steel

Art by Rebecca Zilenziger

WEDNESDAY | APRIL 1 | 8PM --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John Gresh’s Gris Gris

FRIDAY | APRIL 3 | 8PM ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Satin Hearts

SATURDAY | APRIL 4 | 8PM ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

RML Jazz

WEDNESDAY | APRIL 8 | 8PM ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

benny benack

FRIDAY | APRIL 10 | 8PM --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lyndsey Smith

SATURDAY | APRIL 11 | 8PM --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sweaty Beatty

WEDNESDAY | APRIL 15 | 8PM

+ THU., APRIL 02 {TALK} Cities are often called “concrete jungles” — the antithesis of plant life except in carefully set-aside areas. However, the integration of plant life in cities is the topic of the next installment of Phipps Conservatory’s Biophilia: Pittsburgh series. Kelly Ksiazek, a researcher on plant biology and conservation at Northwestern University, gives a talk entitled “Island in the Sky: Connecting Plants and People on Green Roofs.” She will share her research on using urban green roofs as habitat for conservation of native grasses and wildflowers. A discussion follows. Zacchiaus McKee 5:30-7:30 p.m. 1 Schenley Drive, Oakland. Free with RSVP. 412-622-6914 or www.phipps.conservatory.org

{ART}

W W W. N O L A O N T H E S Q U A R E . C O M

24 MARKET SQUARE | PITTSBURGH | 412.471.9100 WWW.BIGYGROUP.COM 46

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

Personal and intimate relationships are often the hardest to capture in photographs. In their Silver Eye Center exhibit A World Imagined, artists Kelli Connell and Sara Macel examine how we define subjective experiences. Connell’s project, now in its 13th year,

uses digital manipulation to depict a woman in a relationship with herself. Macel strives to understand her relationship with her father in a series of photographs inspired by his career. A World Imagined is organized by Carnegie Mellon professor Leo Hsu and Silver Eye executive director David Oresick. Macel speaks tonight at Point Park University, and both artists speak before tomorrow’s opening reception at Silver Eye. ZM 6 p.m. (JVH Auditorium, 201 Wood St., Downtown; free).

APRIL 02

Peking i Acrobats A b t

Talk and opening reception: 6 p.m. Fri., April 3 (1015 E. Carson St., South Side; free; www.silvereye.org). Exhibit continues through June 6.

{GARDENING} Composting isn’t all that hard; microbes do most of the work. But we humans can help give the little buggers better conditions for turning our kitchen scraps and yard debris into rich fertilizer (and keeping them out of landfills). The Pennsylvania Resources Council’s series of Backyard Composting Workshops


{PHOTO COURTESY OF ELANA SCHLENKER}

sp otlight A new pop-up shop in Garfield aims to make gender-based wage inequality a little more palpable. Retail outlet 76<100, the latest recipient of a grant from the nonprofit Awesome Pittsburgh, reflects the U.S. Department of Labor statistic that the median earnings of full-time female workers in Pennsylvania are 76 percent of those of their male counterparts. The shop contains work by U.S.-based women artists, including handmade ceramics and textiles, along with photography prints, publications, stationery and packaged food. The pricing will reflect the wage gap: Male shoppers will be charged 100 percent of the retail price of any item, while female shoppers will be charged 76 percent. Says project creator Elana Schlenker: “Beyond simply raising awareness of the wage gap, we hope to serve as a hub for local women and girls. We’ve organized programming that fosters dialogue, provides practical advice related to this issue, and empowers women to recognize their full value.” An opening reception will be held during Penn Avenue’s Unblurred gallery crawl on Fri., April 3. The shop will be open from noon to 7 p.m. Tuesdays through Sundays during the month of April; the project coincides with Equal Pay Day, on April 14. Zacchiaus McKee Opening reception: 6-10 p.m. Fri., April 3. Continues through April 30. 4901 Penn Ave., Garfield. Free. www.lessthan100.org

continues tonight at Phipps Garden Center. Learn all about composting in 90 minutes, then head home with an 80-gallon Earth Machine Compost Bin. Bill O’Driscoll 7-8:30 p.m. 1059 Shady Ave., Shadyside. $50 ($55 per couple). Register at 412-488-7490 x226 or www.zerowastepgh.org.

{ACROBATICS}

rainbows. BO 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Continues through April 23. 500 Sampsonia Way, North Side. $15-20. www.mattress.org

with Lucy Clabby, Christopher Collier and Amy Wooler playing his wife, son and daughter, respectively. The first of 10 performances is tonight. ZM 8 p.m. Continues through April 12. Henry Heymann Theatre, 4301 Forbes Ave., Oakland. $12-25. 412-624-6568 or www.play.pitt.edu

{MUSIC} Tasty as they might be, dyed eggs and chocolate bunnies are not the only form of Easter art. Shadyside Presbyterian Church offers somewhat more challenging fare with Agnus Dei (“Lamb of God”), famed 20th-century Norwegian composer Egil Hovland’s unusual hybrid of choral mass and bassoon concerto. Tonight’s Good Friday service performance, An Evening of Music and Readings, features bassonist Linda Morton Fisher and the Shadyside F Presbyterian Church Chancel Pre Choir. Choi BO 7 p.m. 5121 Westminster Place, Shadyside. Westm Free. Free 412-682-4300 or www.shadysidepres.org ww

+ FRI., APRIL 03

Known for their grace and exquisitely executed stunts, the {SCREEN} Peking Acrobats are one of the Shimmer, waver, refract, undulate — there’s plenty the world’s top acrobatic troupes, images will be doing in your and they’re on stage at the heart is a p prism, the new video Byham Theater tonight. The troupe has been featured in Ocean’s 11 and on the Wayne Brady Show and Ellen’s Really ly Big Show. Peking Acrobatss also set the world record d for the Human Chair Stack, when they balanced six people atop six chairs 21 feet in the air. Plate spinning, contortions and balancing APRIL 07 acts take over Daniel the stage in Jones this Pittsburgh Cultural Trust show. ZM 7:30 p.m. 101 Sixth St., Downtown. $20-35. 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org

{ART} Though we spotlight socially conscious pop-up gallery 76<100 above, there’s plenty more at the 20 or so venues at tonight’s Unblurred gallery crawl. Openings include Thad Dachille (Circus Animals Not Included) at ModernFormations; The Big Little Show: Art in Miniature, a group exhibit at The Irma Freeman Center for Imagination; The New York Gumbo Show (plus live music) at Most Wanted Fine Art; and Chatham University professor Molly Mehling’s exhibit BiodverCITY (about urban nature) at Assemble. Elsewhere, BOOM Concepts hosts the POC Zine Distro, for zines with radical perspectives, and Pittsburgh Glass Center offers one of its Hot Jam glass-

{STAGE} Great American playwright Sam Shepard’s Curse of the Starving Class is often considered the first of a string of plays about family tragedies. The 1978 work follows the dysfunctional Tate family as they struggle for control of the rundown family farm. University of Pittsburgh Stages’ new production, directed by Cynthia Croot, features Ricardo Vila-Roger as alcoholic father Weston,

NEWS

installation at the Mattress Factory. Kevin Clancy, a locally based artist with an international résumé, produced all the work’s visuals “through analog and physical processes, bending light through a series of crystals, prisms, colored Plexiglas” and more during a recent residency in Michigan. The video, part of the museum’s Screenings series, opens today. Expect

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A World Imagined

Art by Kelli Connell

blowing demos. BO Most events start by 7 p.m. 4900-5500 Penn Ave., Bloomfield/Friendship/ Garfield. Free. 412-441-6950 or www.pennavenue.org

+ SAT., APRIL 04 {ART} Kate Joyce has a great story: In the early 1970s, the Pitt grad filed (and eventually won) a lawsuit opening trade unions to women. Joyce herself went on not to carpentry per se, but to careers as a woodworker and art consultant. Now returned to Pittsburgh, Joyce presents her first solo exhibit here. Kate Joyce: Original Furniture and Sculpture opens with today’s reception at Borelli-Edwards Galleries. BO 1-4 p.m. 3583 Butler St., Lawrenceville. Free. 412-6872606 or www.begalleries.com

{ART} Unholy Smoke — City of Steel

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is a group show featuring work by Steve Staso, Rebecca Zilenziger and Anne Delaney. It opens tonight, appropriately enough, with a reception at a gallery in the shadow of a working steel mill: Braddock’s UnSmoke Systems Artspace. Unholy Smoke explores the American dream and the legacy left by our cities, industries and people. Brooklyn-based Staso is a resolutely anti-commercial artist who’ll create large scale-model prisons … and film them after he sets them on fire. Zilenziger, based in Puerto Rico, showcases her photos of post-Katrina New Orleans. New York City-based Delaney’s paintings and drawings are inspired by the physical material of the steel industry, from blast furnaces to railroad tracks. BO 5-9 p.m. Exhibit continues through April 28. 1137 Braddock Ave., Braddock. Free. unsmokeartspace.com

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+ TUE., APRIL 07 {WORDS} “It seems the harder we work at finding love, the more prone we are to second-guessing the results. … We may admire hard work in most endeavors, but we admire laziness when it comes to finding love.” So wrote Daniel Jones recently in “Modern Love,” the wildly popular New York Times column he’s edited since its inception 11 years ago. Love Illuminated, his 2014 book drawing on the column, is new in paperback. Tonight, Jones — a Pittsburgh-area native who now lives in Massachusetts — returns to celebrate “Modern Love.” Local authors Lori Jakiela and Aubrey Hirsch join him for this free reading in Pitt’s Cathedral of Learning. BO 7 p.m. 4200 Fifth Ave., Oakland. Free. www.writing.pitt.edu

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TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS 412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X165 (PHONE)

310 Allegheny River Blvd. OAKMONT | 412-828-6322

theoakstheater.com FULL BAR and KITCHEN

FRIDAY APRIL 3 | 8PM

The John McIntire Show - COMEDY TALK SHOW -

with special guest Dr. Cyril Wecht SATURDAY APRIL 4 | 8PM PITTSBURGH JAZZ LEGEND

Etta Cox

FRIDAY APRIL 10 | 8PM

THINK PINK FLOYD

THEATER BEAUTY & THE BEAST. The Disney Broadway musical. Thu., April 2, 1 & 7:30 p.m., Fri., April 3, 8 p.m., Sat., April 4, 2 & 8 p.m. and Sun., April 5, 1 p.m. Heinz Hall, Downtown. 412-456-6666. BOEING BOEING. A 60s farce feat. Bernard, a wannabe-Casanova, w/ Italian, German & American fiancées, each a beautiful airline hostess w/ frequent “layovers”. Sun, 2 p.m., Sat, 2 & 7:30 p.m. and Wed-Fri, 7:30 p.m. Thru April 26. Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown. 412-325-6769. CURSE OF THE STARVING CLASS. On the shores of California, four members of the dysfunctional Tate clan desperately try to hold onto their failing farm. Sun, 2 p.m. and Tue-Sat, 8 p.m. Thru April 12. Henry Heymann Theatre, Oakland. 412-624-7529. DINAH. A play about the legendary blues singer Dinah Washington, by Ernest McCarty. Fri, Sat, 8 p.m. and Sun., April 5, 3 p.m. Thru April 5. Pittsburgh Playwrights Theatre, Downtown. 412-377-7803.

DIRTY DANCING. The classic story of Baby & Johnny, two fiercely independent young spirits from different worlds who come together in what will be the most challenging & triumphant summer of their lives. April 7-9, 7:30 p.m., Fri., April 10, 8 p.m. and Sat., April 11, 1, 2, 6:30 & 8 p.m. Benedum Center, Downtown. 412-456-6666. ENDLESS LAWNS. An emotionally trenchant story about two sisters & the men who love & care for them by Anthony McKay, Pittsburgh playwright & Carnegie Mellon University professor. Thu-Sat, 8 p.m., Sat, 2 p.m. and Sun., April 12, 2 p.m. Thru April 12. Pittsburgh Playhouse, Oakland. 412-392-8000. HOW I LEARNED WHAT I LEARNED. A one-man play about the power of art & the power of possibility by August Wilson. Thu-Sat, 8 p.m. and Sun, 2 & 7 p.m. Thru April 5. Pittsburgh Public Theater, Downtown. 412-316-1600. JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR. A 1970 rock opera loosely based on

Focus in on art, plant a few cherry trees and pet some pooches. Podcast goes live every Thursday at www.pghcitypaper.com

the Gospels’ accounts of the last poetic & dangerous truth inside week of Jesus’s life, beginning w/ the machinations of history, rooted the preparation for the arrival of in the economics of slavery. Jesus & his disciples in Jerusalem Thu., April 2, 8 p.m. New Hazlett & ending w/ the crucifixion. Theater, North Side. 412-320-4610. Presented by Stage Right. OBLIVION. Uber-hip Brooklynites April 2-3, 7:30 p.m. and Sat., Pam & Dixon take pride in their April 4, 2 & 7:30 p.m. Palace progressive approach to parenting. But when their Theatre, Greensburg. 16-year-old daughter 724-836-8000. Julie lies about where JESUS CHRIST she spent the weekend, SUPERSTAR. A 1970 . their cool façade www per rock opera loosely a p ty pghci m crumbles. Hamburg based on the Gospels’ .co Studio. Sat, 5:30 & 9 p.m., accounts of the last week Fri, 8 p.m., Tue, 7 p.m., of Jesus’s life, beginning w/ Sun, 2 p.m. and Wed, 1 & the preparation for the arrival of 7 p.m. Thru April 26. City Theatre, Jesus & his disciples in Jerusalem & South Side. 412-431-2489. ending w/ the crucifixion. Fri, Sat, PROFESSOR ELDRITCH’S 7:30 p.m. Thru April 11. Comtra ASYLUM FOR UNCANNY AND Theatre, Cranberry. 724-773-9896. EXTRAORDINARY WOMEN. JH: MECHANICS OF A The Asylum is a site-specific LEGEND. Using the language of work taking up residence at an mechanics, century old ballads undisclosed location somewhere & primary historical records to in Pittsburgh. Small, intimate explore the legend of John audiences will be invited to Henry. A group of local artists join forces w/ Anya Martin of Hiawatha spend the evening observing its occupants -- seven real-life Project to measure the myth, the characters from history, women of man & the machine, revealing a a duplicitous nature who gambled against their society & lost. A joint project through Uncumber [SCREEN] Theatrics & Devious Maid Productions. Thu-Sat, 8 p.m. Thru April 4. www.deviousmaid.org. THE WEDDING FROM HELL. A comedy murder mystery dinner show. Sat, 7 p.m. Thru April 18. Gaetano’s Restaurant, Dormont. 724-344-2069.

FULL LIST ONLINE

COMEDY

National touring live band plays all your favorite Pink Floyd songs with SPECTACULAR LASER SHOW

THU 02 PITTSBURGH IMPROV JAM. Thu, 10 p.m. Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown. 412-325-6769.

SATURDAY APRIL 11 | 7:30PM

FRI 03

The Nieds Hotel Band BENEFIT FOR RIVERVEIW RELAY FOR LIFE and the Businessmen

BLUE LIGHT SPECIAL COMEDY SHOW. 10 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown. 412-339-0608. COMIC WARS. 8 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown. 412-339-0608. THE JOHN MCINTIRE SHOW. 8 p.m. Oaks Theater, Oakmont. 412-828-6311.

with special guest Jessica Bitsura $12 ADVANCE | $15 AT DOOR

FRI 03 - SAT 04

SATURDAY MAY 9 | 8PM

David Allen Coe

EVERY SUNDAY DAY DDA AAYY | 77PM 7PPM

TO PLAY. WIN PRIZES AND GIFT CARDS. Radical Trivia FREE

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

Still from “The Ridge”

Go on wild adventures from the comfort of your theater seat for two nights this weekend with the Banff Mountain Film Festival. A selection of 28 short films, pulled from the original week-long festival in Banff, Alberta, will illuminate the journeys of some of the world’s paramount climbers, paddlers, skiers, snowboarders, mountaineers, mountain bikers, explorers and adventure filmmakers. 7 p.m. Sat., April 4, and 5 p.m. Sun., April 5. Byham Theater, 101 Sixth St., Downtown. $15-20; VIP tickets $100. www.trustarts.culturaldistrict.org

JODY KERNS. 8 p.m. and Sat., April 4, 7 & 10 p.m. Latitude 360, North Fayette. 412-693-5555.

SAT 04 DINNER W/ THE NOLENS. 8 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown. 412-339-0608. HI-FI IMPROV MUSIC MIX. 10 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown. 412-339-0608. CONTINUES ON PG. 50


VISUALART

DELI 31 - MOUNT PLEASANT UFO Razz + Sam Stout

“Clamps Table” (elm and antique Jorgensen clamps, 2015), by Kate Joyce. From the exhibition Kate Joyce: Original Furniture and Sculpture, at Borelli-Edwards Galleries, Lawrenceville.

NEW THIS WEEK BE GALLERIES. Kate Joyce. Furniture, sculpture, paintings & selected period pieces from throughout her career. Opening reception April 4, 1-4pm. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2606. BOULEVARD GALLERY. Spring - Flowers, Fields & Herbs. Work by Eileen F. Yeager. Opening reception April 4, 6-9pm. Verona. 412-828-1031. THE GALLERY 4. Salon Show 2015. Annual group exhibition & competition. Opening reception April 4, 7-11pm. Shadyside. 412-363-5050. IRMA FREEMAN CENTER FOR IMAGINATION. The Big Little Show. An exhibition curated by Sheila D. Ali w/ local & international artists: Abira Ali, Alberto Almarza, Bill Shannon, Douglas “Dougie” Duerring, Eliza Henderson, Etta Cettera, Katy DeMent, Lavern Kemp, Lisa Demagall, Michael “Fig” Magniafico, Ryder Henry, Sandra Streiff, Sheila Ali, Sherry Rusinak & Waylon Richmond. Opening reception April 3. Garfield. 412-924-0634. MODERNFORMATIONS GALLERY. Circus Animals Not Included. Work by Thad Dachille. Materials gathered from the street, signs, icons, symbols & the human body inspire & are assembled into imagery comprised of paintings & graphics generated on both

mixed media canvases & wall prints. Opening reception April 3, 10pm. Garfield. 412-362-0274. SILVER EYE CENTER FOR PHOTOGRAPHY. A World Imagined: Kelli Connell & Sara Macel. Photography that reflects on authorship, on photographic construction & on the ways in which we define relationships through our subjective experiences of them. Opening reception April 3, 6-9pm. South Side. 412-431-1810. SPINNING PLATE GALLERY. WaterWorks 2015. Pittsburgh Watercolor Society members showcase new works in watercolor & other water media. Opening reception April 4, 5-8pm. Friendship. 412-441-0194.

ONGOING 707 PENN GALLERY. Rebecca Lessner: Hunter Gatherer. A photography exhibition exploring living off the land. Downtown. 412-456-6666. 709 PENN GALLERY. Light & Landscape. A photography exhibition feat. a dozen printed canvases of urban landscapes & natural settings by artist Joey Kennedy. Downtown. 412-471-6070. ANDY WARHOL MUSEUM. Someday is Now: The Art of Corita Kent. A full-scale survey covering more than 30 years of work by American artist

Corita Kent; a designer, teacher, feminist, activist for civil rights & anti-war causes. Exposures. Works from Pittsburgh based artist, Cecilia Ebitz’s “Good Intentions”, inspired by the work & teachings of Corita Kent. Permanent collection. Artwork & artifacts by the famed Pop Artist. North Side. 412-237-8300. ARTDFACT. Artdfact Gallery. The works of Timothy Kelley & other regional & US artists on display. Sculpture, oil & acrylic paintings, mixed media, found objects, more. North Side. 724-797-3302. BACKSTAGE BAR AT THEATRE SQUARE. Artwork by Bonnie Gloris. March 11 thru April 15. Downtown. 412-325-6769. BE GALLERIES. Back & Forth. Works by Kenn Bass, Dana Ingham, Lenore Thomas & Janet Towbin. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2606. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART. Visiting Van Gogh: Still Life, Basket of Apples. Van Gogh’s “Still Life, Basket of Apples” (1887),”Le Moulin de la Galette” (1886–1887), “Wheat Fields after the Rain” (1890), & Paul Signac’s “Place des Lices, St. Tropez”, visiting from the Saint Louis Art Museum. Sketch to Structure. Unfolding the architectural design process to show how buildings take shape. Will close temporarily on May 25 & reopen on June 6. Oakland. 412-622-3131.

WINGHARTS - GREENSBURG UFO Razz + Sam Stout CARNIVORES - OAKMONT Blue Moon + Sam Stout STONE HOUSE - FARMINGTON Curious Traveler + Sam Stout

CONTINUES ON PG. 51

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NOW OPEN!

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BIG LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 48

*Stuff We Like

SUN 05

BASEBALL EDITION

TUE 07

Bar & Grill

Daily Bucco Specials! HAPPY HOUR

WED 08

Paul Kuhrman’s Defaced Baseball Cards

Monday-Friday 5-7 PM & 10-12min

In the local artist’s witty recasting of old trading cards, the Seattle Mariners’ John Moses carries a pair of stone tablets, and Astros catcher Robbie Wine wields not a bat but a bottle. www.paulkuhrman.com

WEDNESDAY’S PIZZA & PASTA NIGHT

EXHIBITS {PHOTO COURTESY OF HBO}

THURSDAY’S KARAOKE WING & YUENGS NIGHT FRIDAY’S LADIES NIGHT LATE NIGHT BITES Friday and Saturday nights open till 5 AM PRE-GAMERS | BURGERS | WINGS | SANDWICHES | PASTAS | PIZZAS

DELIVERY AVAILABLE 2019 EAST CARSON STREET SOUTHSIDE | 412-488-1400

Eastbound and Down

{PHOTO BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Chronicling the misadventures of washed-up former major-league pitcher Kenny Powers, this HBO comedy is entertaining even — and perhaps especially — if you can’t stand baseball. On DVD and various streaming services

For the Love of Baseball Jung-ho Kang

{PHOTO BY LISA CUNNINGHAM}

As the major leagues’ first Korean-born hitter, the new Pirates shortstop is a pioneer. And his power numbers from back home should be promising for the Bucs.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

COMPASS INN. Demos & tours w/ costumed guides feat. this restored stagecoach stop. 724-238-4983. CONNEY M. KIMBO GALLERY. University of Pittsburgh Jazz Exhibit: Memorabilia & Awards from the International Hall of Fame. Oakland. 412-648-7446. DEPRECIATION LANDS MUSEUM. Small living TUESDAY NIGHT STAND-UP. history museum celebrating Tue, 9 p.m. Hot Rod Cafe, the settlement & history of the Mt. Washington. 412-592-7869. Depreciation Lands. Allison Park. 412-486-0563. FALLINGWATER. Tour the COMEDY OPEN MIC. Hosted by famed Frank Lloyd Wright house. Ronald Renwick. Wed, 9:30 p.m. 724-329-8501. Scarpaci’s Place, Mt. Washington. FIRST PRESBYTERIAN 412-431-9908. CHURCH. Tours of 13 Tiffany JOKING OFF. A weekly stand stained-glass windows. up show hosted by Dick Winters. Downtown. 412-471-3436. Wed, 9 p.m. Caliente Pizza & Bar, FORT PITT MUSEUM. Bloomfield. 412-904-1744. Reconstructed fort houses museum of Pittsburgh history circa French & Indian War ALLEGHENY-KISKI VALLEY & American Revolution. HERITAGE MUSEUM. Military Downtown. 412-281-9285. artifacts & exhibits on the FRICK ART & HISTORICAL Allegheny Valley’s industrial CENTER. Ongoing: tours of heritage. Tarentum. 724-224-7666. Clayton, the Frick estate, w/ classes ANDREW CARNEGIE FREE & programs for all ages. Point LIBRARY MUSIC HALL. Capt. Breeze. 412-371-0600. Thomas Espy Room Tour. The HARTWOOD ACRES. Tour this Capt. Thomas Espy Post 153 of Tudor mansion & stable complex. the Grand Army of the Republic Enjoy hikes & outdoor activities served local Civil War veterans in the surrounding park. for over 54 years & is the best Allison Park. 412-767-9200. preserved & most intact GAR post KENTUCK KNOB. Tour the in the United States. Carnegie. other Frank Lloyd Wright house. 412-276-3456. 724-329-8501. BAYERNHOF MUSEUM. KERR MEMORIAL Large collection of MUSEUM. Tours of automatic roll-played a restored 19thmusical instruments century, middle-class & music boxes in a home. Oakmont. mansion setting. Call www. per 412-826-9295. for appointment. pa pghcitym MARIDON MUSEUM. O’Hara. 412-782-4231. .co Collection includes jade & BOST BUILDING. ivory statues from China & Collectors. Preserved Japan, as well as Meissen porcelain. materials reflecting the Butler. 724-282-0123. industrial heritage of MCGINLEY HOUSE & MCCULLY Southwestern PA. Homestead. LOG HOUSE. Historic homes 412-464-4020. open for tours, lectures & more. CARNEGIE SCIENCE CENTER. Monroeville. 412-373-7794. H2Oh!. Experience kinetic NATIONAL AVIARY. Home to water-driven motion & discover more than 600 birds from over 200 the relations between water, species. W/ classes, lectures, demos land & habitat. How do everyday & more. North Side. 412-323-7235. decisions impact water supply NATIONALITY ROOMS. 26 & the environment? Ongoing: rooms helping to tell the story Buhl Digital Dome (planetarium), of Pittsburgh’s immigrant past. Miniature Railroad & Village, USS University of Pittsburgh. Oakland. Requin submarine & more. North 412-624-6000. Side. 412-237-3400. OLD ST. LUKE’S. Pioneer church CARRIE FURNACE. Built in 1907, Carrie Furnaces 6 & 7 are extremely features 1823 pipe organ, Revolutionary War graves. Scott. rare examples of pre World War II 412-851-9212. iron-making technology. Rankin. OLIVER MILLER HOMESTEAD. 412-464-4020 x.21. This pioneer/Whiskey Rebellion CENTER FOR POSTNATURAL site features log house, HISTORY. Explore the complex blacksmith shop & gardens. interplay between culture, nature South Park. 412-835-1554. & biotechnology. Open Fridays 5-8, PENNSYLVANIA TROLLEY Saturdays 12-4 & Sundays 12-4. MUSEUM. Trolley rides & Garfield. 412-223-7698. exhibits. Includes displays, CHILDREN’S MUSEUM OF walking tours, gift shop, PITTSBURGH. Missing Links (The picnic area & Trolley Theatre. Rainbow Jumpy). Bounce, jump, Washington. 724-228-9256. roll, run & walk through a 30PHIPPS CONSERVATORY & foot inflatable “jumpy” art piece BOTANICAL GARDEN. Spring created by Felipe Dulzaides & on Flower Show. Tulips, daffodils, loan from The New Children’s hyacinths & other blooms are Museum, in San Diego CA. the stars of Spring Flower Show, North Side. 412-322-5058. FIVE MINUTES OF FAME OPEN MIC. A melting pot of poets, singers, comedians, dancers, musicians & entertainers. Presented by Chicksburgh. Sun, 8 p.m. Gus’s Cafe, Lawrenceville. 412-315-7271.

Baseball is, axiomatically, the most literary sport, as this 2008 anthology (updated and reissued last year) attests. Its 24 essays include work by such names as George Plimpton, Roger Angell and co-editor Lee Gutkind, and range from American sandlots to pesapallo — Finnish baseball.

Pittsburgh Pirates Fireworks Nights Baseball and pretty sky explosions combined; the first fireworks night is April 18. Plus, you don’t need a ticket to see the fireworks.

FULL LIST ONLINE


VISUAL ART

a celebration of sweet scents & colorful sights. 14 indoor rooms & 3 outdoor gardens feature exotic plants & floral displays from around the world. Tropical Forest Congo. An exhibit highlighting some of Africa’s lushest landscapes. Oakland. 412-622-6914. PHOTO ANTIQUITIES. Photographs & Jewerly. A hundred years (1839-1939) of photographs that incorporated jewelry. Call for guided tours. North Side. 412-231-7881. PINBALL PERFECTION. Pinball museum & players club. West View. 412-931-4425. PITTSBURGH ZOO & PPG AQUARIUM. Home to 4,000 animals, including many endangered species. Highland Park. 412-665-3639. RACHEL CARSON HOMESTEAD. A Reverence for Life. Photos & artifacts of her life & work. Springdale. 724-274-5459. RIVERS OF STEEL NATIONAL HERITAGE AREA. Exhibits on the Homestead Mill. Steel industry & community artifacts from 1881-1986. Homestead. 412-464-4020. SENATOR JOHN HEINZ HISTORY CENTER. From Slavery to Freedom. Highlight’s Pittsburgh’s role in the anti-slavery movement. Ongoing: Western PA Sports Museum, Clash of Empires, & exhibits on local history, more. Strip District. 412-454-6000. SEWICKLEY HEIGHTS HISTORY CENTER. Museum commemorates Pittsburgh industrialists, local history. Sewickley. 412-741-4487. SOLDIERS & SAILORS MEMORIAL HALL. War in the Pacific 1941-1945. Feat. a collection of military artifacts showcasing photographs, uniforms, shells & other related items. Military museum dedicated to honoring military service members since the Civil War through artifacts & personal mementos. Oakland. 412-621-4253. ST. ANTHONY’S CHAPEL. Features 5,000 relics of Catholic saints. North Side. 412-323-9504. ST. NICHOLAS CROATIAN CATHOLIC CHURCH. Maxo Vanka Murals. Mid-20th century murals depicting war, social justice & the immigrant experience in America. Millvale. 412-407-2570. WEST OVERTON MUSEUMS. Learn about distilling & coke-making in this pre-Civil War industrial village. 724-887-7910.

GLENN GREENE STAINED GLASS STUDIO INC. Original Glass Art by Glenn Greene. Exhibition of new work, recent work & older work. Regent Square. 412-243-2772. HILLMAN LIBRARY. Get to The Point!. An exhibition of early drawings, paintings, postcards, engravings, maps, & photographs from the University of Pittsburgh Library System Archives Service Center that document the history of the Point & Point State Park. Ground Floor. Oakland. 412-648-3330. HOYT INSTITUTE OF FINE ART. Annual Hoyt Regional Juried Exhibit. Showcasing Pittsburgh area artists. New Castle. 724-652-2882. HUNT INSTITUTE FOR BOTANICAL DOCUMENTATION. Elements. Drawings & watercolors of bird nests w/ a focus on the natural & man-made materials incorporated into these architectural structures. The featured artists are Sue Abramson, Wendy Brockman, David Morrison & Kate Nessler. Oakland. 412-268-2434. JAMES GALLERY. Headliners. New paintings, mixed media works, glass & ceramics. Feat. Christine Aaron, Eileen Braun, Claire Cotts, Jamie Harris, Ben Johnson, Micheal Madigan, Susan Morosky & Scott Turri. West End. 412-922-9800. LA PRIMA ESPRESSO. Paintings/Prints of Italy. Prints of Vince Ornato’s oil paintings of Italy. Strip District. 412-281-1922. LAKEVUE ATHLETIC CLUB. Pop-Up Gallery. Work by a variety of artists. 724-316-9326. MARKET SQUARE. Jennifer Wen Ma: Installation. “A Winter Landscape Cradling Bits of Sparkle” 120 live trees, 200 kg of Chinese ink, wooden pathway & glass globes. Downtown. 412-471-1511. MATTRESS FACTORY. Artists in Residence. Installations created in-residence by Danny Bracken, John Peña, Ryder Henry, Kathleen Montgomery, & Benjamin Sota. Part of the 2014 Pittsburgh Biennial. Ongoing Installations. Works by Turrell, Lutz, Kusama, Anastasi, Highstein, Wexler & Woodrow. North Side. 412-231-3169. MODERNFORMATIONS GALLERY. Earthly Delites // Boring Chores. Homemade Artwork by: K. Gould, M.Shalonis, & S.Neary. Garfield. 412-362-0274. MORGAN CONTEMPORARY GLASS GALLERY. 3d@mgg. A exhibition of artists working in three dimensional media. Shadyside. 412-441-7258.

CHATHAM UNIVERSITY. Culture in Context. African Art from the Olkes Collection. Shadyside. 412-365-1232. CHRISTINE FRECHARD GALLERY. Venezuelan Artists United. In collaboration w/ Luzardo Gallery in Venezuela. Feat. work by Jesus Perez, Nerio Quintero, Freddy Paz Rincon, Alvaro Paz, Gustavo Paris & Johan Galue.Squirrel Hill. 412-421-8888. CRAZY MOCHA COFFEE COMPANY. Nature Photography. Work by Helena Knörr. Bloomfield. 412-681-5225. EASTSIDE GALLERY. John Eastman & Josh Hogan. By appt. only. Forest Hills. 412-465-0140. ECLECTIC ART & OBJECTS GALLERY. 19th century American & European paintings combined w/ contemporary artists & their artwork. The Hidden Collection. Watercolors by Robert N. Blair (1912- 2003). Hiromi Traditional Japanese Oil Paintings The Lost Artists of the 1893 Chicago Exhibition. Collectors Showcase. Emsworth. 412-734-2099. FILMMAKERS GALLERIES. Pittsburgh Photo Section. Exhibit celebrating the 130th Anniversary of the Pittsburgh Photo Section. Oakland. 412-681-5449. FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. Impressionist to Modernist: Masterworks in Early Photography. Feat. photographs by major artists working in the circle of Alfred Stieglitz, capturing the international development of photography around turn of the 20th century. Permanent collection of European Art. Point Breeze. 412-371-0600. FUTURE TENANT. Flash: A CFA School of Art Group Exhibition. Showcasing the talents from Carnegie Mellon University’s College of Fine Arts. Downtown. 412-456-6666. GALERIE WERNER, THE MANSIONS ON FIFTH. Fabrizio Gerbino. New paintings by artist. Oakland. 412-716-1390. GALLERIE CHIZ. Liz Goldberg & Patty Gallagher. Dual exhibtion w/ Goldberg’s painting & drawings for “Cigar Queens of Havana” & Gallagher’s wearable art, “Hot Tropics”. Shadyside. 412-441-6005. GALLERY ON 43RD STREET. Liza Brenner. “Plein Air Landscapes”. Oil on paper works by artist. Lawrenceville. 412-683-6488. GALLERY-VERY FINE ART. Group Show. Work by Linda Price-Sneddon, Peggy Habets, James E. Trusko & others. South Side. 412-901-8805.

FUNDRAISERS SUN 05 BOOK ‘EM BOOKS TO PRISONERS WORK PARTY. Read & code letters, pick books,

Animal Rescue League 15th Annual Wildlife Baby Shower Fundraiser

CONTINUED FROM PG. 49

OLIN FINE ARTS CENTER. PORTALS. Paintings by Robert Patrick. Washington. 724- 503-1001 x 6043. PENN AVENUE ARTS DISTRICT. Unblurred Gallery Crawl. Garfield. 412-441-6147-ext.-7. PITTSBURGH CENTER FOR THE ARTS. Nine Solo Exhibits. Feat. the work of Scott Andrew, Vlad Basarub, Terry Boyd, Oreen Cohen, Joy Christiansen Erb, Katie Ford, Joseph Lupo, Katie Murken & Hisham Youssef. Shadyside. 412-361-0873. PITTSBURGH GLASS CENTER. ABC@PGC. A colorful exhibition feat. glass sculptures combined w/ an interactive illuminated word building piece that visitors can touch, rearrange & wear like apparel. Created by Jen Elek & Jeremy Bert. Friendship. 412-365-2145. REVISION SPACE. winterlong. Work by Caldwell Linker. Lawrenceville. 412-735-3201. SHALER NORTH HILLS LIBRARY. Annual Jazz Art Show. Original work from artists of all ages in celebration of Jazz Appreciation Month. Reception April 7, 7pm. Glenshaw. 412-486-0021. THE SHOP. Jennifer Lee & Terry Young. New work by these artists. Gallery hours on Fridays from 12-6pm. Closing reception May 1, 5-9pm. Bloomfield. 412-951-0622. THE SOCIETY FOR CONTEMPORARY CRAFT. Bridge 13. Work by Elisabeth Higgins, Keith Lo Bue, & Jason Walker. Strip District. 412-261-7003. SPACE. UNLOADED. A multimedia group show that explores historical & social issues surrounding the availability, use & impact of guns in our culture. Closing reception April 24. The Sideways Museum. A collection of works by Pittsburgh-based artists exploring folk & visionary art traditions. Viewable 24 hrs. a day w/ periodic alterations. Interior open for special occasions. Downtown. 412-325-7723. WAYNESBURG UNIVERSITY. Jason Propst Senior Art Exhibit. Asian inspired works include sculpture, paintings, drawings & jewelry. Benedum Galleries. 724-852-3274. WOOD STREET GALLERIES. Absense of Self. Installations, video projections & ‘flicker’ objects ft. Ivana Franke, Lauri Astala, Bryndis Hronn Ragnarsdottir & Mirjana Vodopija. Downtown. 412-456-6666.

April 11, 2015 12 pm - 4 pm DROP OFF LOCATION: Shadyside Journeys of Life, 810 Bellefonte Street

Wildlife Center 6000 Verona Rd, Verona, PA 15147 WWW.ANIMALRESCUE.ORG 412.345.7300, EXT. 500

Kretzler’s Tavern 2240 Babcock Blvd., Ross Twsp., PA

h t n o M e h t f Beer o

$1.75

16 oz. Draft

Happy Hour 5 pm -7 pm

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BIG LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 51

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pack ‘em or database ‘em! Sundays 4-7 p.m. or by appt. Thomas Merton Center, Garfield. 412-361-3022.

EVERYONE IS A CRITIC EVENT: Pittsburgh Cultural Trust Presents

WED 08

EVERY WEDNESDAY!

PLAY FEUD! $ .50

2 Yuenglings “Survey says.. it’s a BLAST!” JEKYL AND HYDE | 140 S S. 18TH STREET 412-488-0777 | BARSMART.COM/JEKYLANDHYDE

George Takei

LITERARY

CRITIC: Emily Drill, 33, a professor from Squirrel Hill

AFTER HAPPY HOUR REVIEW JOURNAL READING. Release party. 7 p.m. Runaway Studios, Bloomfield. ENGLISH LEARNERS’ BOOK CLUB. For advanced ESL students. Presented in cooperation w/ the Greater Pittsburgh Literacy Council. Thu, 1 p.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. PETER HESSLER. Talk by the author of River Town, Country Driving, Strange Stones & Oracle Bones. He is a contributing writer for National Geographic & astaff writer at The New Yorker. 8:30 p.m. Frick Fine Arts Auditorium, Oakland. 412-624-6508. SPOKEN JAZZ. Open mic-less night w/ musical accompaniment for poetry, prose, song, more. First Thu of every month, 8-10 p.m. The Space Upstairs, Point Breeze. 412-225-9269.

SUN 05 SOOTHING SUNDAYS. Poetry, comedy & R&B. Presented by poetry.com First Sun of every month House of Savvy, North Side. 412-867-0827.

MON 06

Rhythm Jazz & Blues

FUSION SHOW featuring

OPEN POETRY WORKSHOP. Presented by the Pittsburgh Poetry Exchange. Those wishing to present a poem for discussion should bring multiple copies. First Mon of every month, 7-10 p.m. Brentwood Library, Brentwood. 412-882-5694. READING ROUND TABLE. Feat. plays from August Wilson & new works by up & coming playwrights. First Mon of every month, 7 p.m.

MON 06 - WED 08

JOHNNY ANGEL

JESSICA LEE

ERIC DEFADE

FIRST SATURDAYS APRIL, MAY & JUNE

STARTING

APRIL4

8PM IN THE UPSTAIRS BALLROOM | $10 COVER

MARK STICKLAND

RICK PURCELL

422 FORELAND ST | PITTSBURGH | 412.904.3335

JAMESSTREETGASTROPUB.COM 52

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

OUTSIDE

UNITE RED: JAMBIEREE. Beer release & carnival for International Women’s Collaboration Brew Day. Benefits Pink Boots Society. 6 p.m. Sing Sing, Waterfront. 724-993-3673.

at the Pittsburgh Humanities Festival, Byham Theater, Downtown

THU 02

PITT - GREENSBURG WRITERS FESTIVAL. Featuring bestselling author Stewart O’Nan, noir/crime writer William Boyle, recording artist Emily Rogers, memoirist Nancy McCabe, Pitt-Greensburg alumni authors, & other writers. Plus a special screening of Pittsburgh-based filmmaker Julie Sokolow’s award-winning documentary, “Aspie Seeks Love.” April 6-10, 7 p.m. Fireside Inn, Crafton. 724-836-7741.

TUE 07 KID’S BOOKS FOR GROWN-UPS BOOKCLUB. First Tue of every month, 10 a.m. Penguin Bookshop, Sewickley. 412-741-3838.

Designed for 2-5 year olds & their caretakers. Registration required. 10:30-11:15 a.m. Senator John Heinz History Center, Strip District. 412-454-6000.

SAT 04

Sun., March 29

WHEN:

3RD ANNUAL PITTSBURGH SAKURA FESTIVAL. Watch the planting of three ceremonial young cherry trees & three other trees. Enjoy Taiko music performances, kite flying, folk dancing, tea ceremony, raffle, more. Pierce Shelter. 8 a.m.-1 p.m. North Park, Allison Park. 724-935-1766.

MON 06 I have a lot of respect for George Takei and how he’s been using his fame. He’s always been well known, so I thought it’d be really interesting to hear what he had to say. I have to admit a lot of the topics he’s covered are things that I’ve heard about beforehand in interviews or other things that he’s done, but I thought it was very moving. We did the meet-and-greet beforehand, and it was really neat. It was an honor to get to meet him, even if it was only for just a quick second. I particularly enjoyed when he talked about his experiences in the Japanese internment camps and what his family went through, and the parallels between that and the treatment of the LGBT community. I thought it was really powerful hearing about that and the camps in person.

ROLL PITTSBURGH. Join a group bike ride from Market Square to Lawrenceville. All ages, skill levels & types of bikes are welcome. 7 p.m. Market Square, Downtown. 412-208-4892.

WED 08 WEDNESDAY MORNING WALK. Naturalist-led, rain or shine. Wed Beechwood Farms, Fox Chapel. 412-963-6100.

OTHER STUFF THU 02

ADVANCED ITALIAN CONVERSATION. Thu, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. BIOPHILIA: PITTSBURGH. A FAMILY FRIENDLY KIDS OPEN meet-up group dedicated to MIC. Sat, 6 p.m. Hambone’s, strengthening the bond between Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. people & the natural world. Come MARTY’S MARKET KIDS’ discuss an enviromental topic CORNER. Ages 5-11. Sat, 3-5 p.m. & share ideas. First Thu of Marty’s Market, Strip District. every month, 5:30 p.m. Phipps 412-586-7177. Conservatory & Botanical Garden, Oakland. 412-622-6914. CONVERSATIONAL CHINESE MAKER STORY TIME. Explore & CHINESE CULTURE. Thu, 7 p.m. tools, materials & processes Mount Lebanon Public Library, inspired by books. Listen to stories Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. read by librarian-turned-Teaching EXPOSURE. Multi-faceted Artist Molly. Mon, 11 a.m.-12 p.m. performance & exhibition of visual Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, art, film/video, fashion, music, North Side. 412-322-5058. HMU artistry, photography, & performing art. Presented by RAW: Pittsburgh. 7 p.m. CHESS CLUB. For Mr. Smalls Theater, students in grades Millvale. 412-977-7506. K-7. First Tue of INTERNATIONAL every month, 6:30 p.m. WOMEN’S www. per pa Mount Lebanon Public ASSOCIATION OF pghcitym .co Library, Mt. Lebanon. PITTSBURGH. Social, 412-531-1912. cultural club of American/ HOMEWORK HELP. For international women. Thu grades 1-8. Tue, 3:30-5:30 p.m. First Baptist Church, Oakland. Assemble, Garfield. 412-432-9127. iwap.pittsburgh@gmail.com. RENAISSANCE DANCE GUILD. Learn a variety of dances from ENVIRONMENT!. Hands-on the 15-17th centuries. Porter learning activities focused on Hall, Room A18A. Thu, 8 p.m. environmental issues, led by Carnegie Mellon University, local makers, scientists, artists, Oakland. 412-567-7512. & technologists. 4-6:30 p.m. WEEKLY WELLNESS CIRCLE. Assemble, Garfield. 412-432-9127. Group acupuncture & guided HOP INTO HISTORY: meditation for stress-relief. Thu INNOVATION STATION. Explore DeMasi Wellness, Aspinwall. some of Pittsburgh’s innovations 412-927-4768. & spend the morning tinkering, YELP’S UNDER THE BIG TOP. building & experimenting in the Aerial acts, carnival games, face new Discovery Place prototype lab. painting, bites, beverages, & “The B Y Z AC CH I AU S M C K E E

PITTSBURGH CONTINENTAL PHILOSOPHY READING GROUP. Tue, 6 p.m. East End Book Exchange, Bloomfield. 412-224-2847. STEEL CITY SLAM. Open mic poets & slam poets. 3 rounds of 3 minute poems. Tue, 7:45 p.m. Capri Pizza and Bar, East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

WED 08 TESS BARRY, BERNADETTE ULSAMER & LORI WILSON. 7 p.m. Delanie’s Coffee, South Side. 412-927-4030.

KIDSTUFF THU 02 - WED 08 ALLEGHENY COUNTY MARBLES PROGRAM. Free games & lessons for children 14 & under. Tournaments. Various locations. Thru May 27 412-821-5779. BACKYARD EXHIBIT. Musical swing set, sandbox, solar-powered instruments, more. Ongoing Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

SAT 04 ANNUAL EGG-CELLENT EGG HUNT. Egg Hunt around the museum. Follow the clues that lead to the treats. This event is designed for children 3–10 years old. The first 600 children can join in the fun. 12-4 p.m. Carnegie Museum of Natural History, Oakland. 412-622-3131.

MON 06

TUE 07

WED 08

FULL LIST ONLINE


World’s Greatest” sideshow performer. 21+. 8-10 p.m. Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058. ZEN MEDITATION. Hosted by City Dharma. Thu, 6:30-8 p.m. and Sat, 7-8:30 a.m. Church of the Redeemer, Squirrel Hill. 412-965-9903.

CARNEGIE MELLON INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL. 19 award winning films from 14 different countries. Various locations. Thru April 11 412-268-2212.

FRI 03 FRIDAY NIGHT CONTRA DANCE. A social, traditional American dance. No partner needed, beginners welcome, lesson at 7:30. Fri, 8 p.m. Swisshelm Park Community Center, Swissvale. 412-945-0554. PARTY IN THE TROPICS. Dj, cocktails First Fri of every month, 7-11 p.m. Thru May 1 Phipps Conservatory & Botanical Garden, Oakland. 412-622-6914.

SUNDAY MARKET. A gathering of local crafters & dealers selling unique items, from home made foodstuffs to art. Sun, 6-10 p.m. The Night Gallery, Lawrenceville. 724-417-0223.

MON 06 SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670. SPANISH LITERATURE & CONVERSATION. Mon, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912.

ZEN MEDITATION. Hosted by City Dharma. Thu, 6:30-8 p.m. and Sat, 7-8:30 a.m. Church of the Redeemer, Squirrel Hill. 412-965-9903.

ALTERNATIVE APPROACHES TO PREVENTING & HANDLING ARTHRITIC PAIN. Presented by Dr. Rick Goins w/ Angela Frazzini. 11:45 a.m. The Woodlands, Wexford. 724-935-5470. CAPOEIRA ANGOLA. Tue, 6:30-8 p.m. Irma Freeman Center for Imagination, Garfield. 412-924-0634. DRAG QUEEN TRIVIA NIGHT. First Tue of every month Eclipse Lounge, Lawrenceville. 412-251-0097. JAPANESE CONVERSATION CLUB. First and Third Tue of every month, 6-7 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151. LET’S SPEAK ENGLISH!. Practice conversational English. Tue, 6 p.m. Carnegie Library, Squirrel Hill. 412-422-9650. MT. LEBANON CONVERSATION SALON. Discuss current events w/ friends & neighbors. For seniors. First Tue of every month, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. RYOJI IKEDA. Lecture w/ the renowned digital artist. 5 p.m. Kresge Theater, CMU, Oakland. 412-268-2409.

SAT 04 - SUN 05

WED 08

BANFF MOUNTAIN FILM FESTIVAL. A festival of films documenting some of the feats of the world’s most accomplished outdoorsmen. Sat. 7 p.m. and Sun. 5 p.m. www.trustarts.org. THE WESTERN PA KENNEL CLUB DOG SHOW. All-breed conformation show & obedience trial w/ 1,000 dogs competing for Best-in-Show. April 4-5, 7 a.m.5 p.m. Monroeville Convention Center, Monroeville.

BEREAVEMENT SUPPORT GROUP. For Widows/Widowers over 50. Second and Fourth Wed of every month, 1-2:30 p.m. St. Sebastian Church, Ross. 412-366-1300. DETROIT STYLE URBAN BALLROOM DANCE. 3rd floor. Wed, 6:30-8 p.m. Hosanna House, Wilkinsburg. 412-242-4345. ENGLISH CONVERSATION (ESL). Wed, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. KNOW THE SHOW BEFORE YOU GO: DIRTY DANCING. Hosted by Christopher Rawson, this program allows patrons to gain insight on each production. Light refreshments. Register online. 6:30 p.m. Trust Arts Education Center, Downtown. 412-471-6070. LET’S SPEAK ENGLISH!. Practice conversational English. Wed, 5-6 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151. THE PITTSBURGH SHOW OFFS. A meeting of jugglers & spinners.

YES YOU CAN DANCE

Yes You Can Dance’s Special Needs Dance program is seeking volunteers to help with its mission of “enhancing the physical and emotional well-being of individuals and communities through social dance experiences.” Sign up to be a dance mentor, dance host or a dance assistant. Dance lessons are provided in the volunteer training, so no prior experience is necessary. For more information, call 412-999-3998 or visit www.yesyoucandance.org.

SAT 04 A-MAN ROCKS THE MIC TALENT COMPETITION. Pittsburgh artists compete for the title of “Aman Rock’s Artist of the Year.” Feat. MC Leslie “Ezra” Smith w/ performances by LHAGIC, SOS & more. Fashion by Capricorn Entertainment & Pittsburgh Video Vixen’s. 8-10 p.m. New Hazlett Theater, North Side. ALL ABOUT THE BURGH, THE CULTURE TO KETCHUP TOUR!. Step aboard a vintage 1920’s style Trolley & experience Pittsburgh w/ a guided 2-hour tour. Sat, 12:45-2:45 p.m. Thru April 25 Station Square, Station Square. 412-391-7433.

A BENEFIT FOR THE FRIENDS OF THE HARMED

SATURDAY

MAY 16

21+

TUE 07

[VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITY]

PUBLIC ART WALKING TOUR: CMU. Discover some of the artworks on Carnegie Mellon University’s campus. 12 p.m. Carnegie Mellon University, Oakland. 412-391-2060. RAINBOW RISING COFFEE HOUSE. For gay, lesbian, bisexual & transgendered individuals & friends. Music, games, movies, entertainment, more. Unitarian Universalist Congregation, Smithton. First Fri of every month 724-872-5056.

FREEDOM FROM FRACKING

SUN 05 BOARD GAME NIGHT. Third and First Sun of every month, 6 p.m. Brew on Broadway, Beechview. 412-437-8676. PRIDE BOWLING LEAGUE. Seeking bowlers of all levels. Every other Sunday. Every other Sun, 6:30 p.m. Forward Lanes, Squirrel Hill. 412-337-0701. RADICAL TRIVIA. Trivia game hosted by DJ Jared Evans. Come alone or bring a team. Sun, 7 p.m. Oaks Theater, Oakmont. 412-828-6322.

* C L E A N W A T E R , A I R , A N D E N E RGY *

THU 02 - WED 08

BEGINNER TAI CHI CLASSES. Sat, 9 a.m. Friends Meeting House, Oakland. 412-683-2669. RECLAIMING THE REAL YOU. Psychologist Arlene Rattan, Ph.D., leads the workshop. The following five Saturdays the group will continue as “Women Sharing Wisdom” w/ discussion, book study, more. Sat, 10:30 a.m.12:30 p.m. Thru April 18 South Side Presbyterian Church, South Side. 412-916-4040. SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670. SOUTH HILLS SCRABBLE CLUB. Free Scrabble games, all levels. Sat, 1-3 p.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. SWING CITY. Learn & practice swing dancing skills. Sat, 8 p.m. Wightman School, Squirrel Hill. 412-759-1569. WIGLE WHISKEY BARRELHOUSE TOURS. Sat, 12:30 & 2 p.m. Wigle Whiskey Barrel House, North Side. 412-224-2827.

RUSTED ROOT Mike Stout & The Human Union * Kellee Maize & Friends UJAMAA * Anne Feeney * Smokestack Lightning * DJ Paul Dang Liz Berlin * Gene Stovall * Jasiri X * Palermo Stone Vanessa German * The Benevolent Sneaky Mike * Tom Breiding For Tickets: https://www.ticketfly.com/purchase/event/779201

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All levels welcome. Wed, 7:30 p.m. Union Project, Highland Park. 412-363-4550. TAROT CARD LESSONS. Wed, 7 p.m. Dobra Tea, Squirrel Hill. 412-449-9833.

AUDITIONS FRONT PORCH THEATRICALS. Seeking actors to audition for the musical, “Light in the Piazza”. Trained singers/actors, versatile equity & non-equity males & females w/ strong singing abilities in operatic & standard musical theater styles, in addition to strong acting capabilities. 16 - 32 bars of a legit musical theater ballad & 16 - 32 bars of a classical art or opera/ operetta piece; head shot and resume. Auditions by appt only, April 17 & 18, 5-10pm. Register online. http://frontporchpgh.com/ audition-form. Pittsburgh Musical Theater, West End. 412-551-4027. GEYER PERFORMING ARTS CENTER. Actors age 8 & up sought for a production of “Les Miserables”. Bring 16 to 32 bars of a song selection & prepare to sing a song from the production. Call for more information. Thru April 6. 724-887-0887. LOVE MUCH THESIS FILM. Actors may audition in person, by appointment or electronically by sending an audition packet to LoveMuchTheMovie@Gmail. com. The packet should include a headshot, resume, signed waiver & YouTube or Vimeo link to audition video (remember to slate your name, height, and the character(s) you are reading for). Thru April 2. Chatham University, Shadyside. 678-539-0441. MY GRANDMOTHER’S RAVIOLI. Seeking grandparents who cook, 50 to 100 years old, big personalities who can cook of all ethnicities for Mo Rocca’s cooking show. Thru April 3. 347-429-6150. NEW HORIZON THEATER. New Horizon is looking for artists to help w/ its mission. Needed: Set Designer, Carpenter, Stage Help, Light Designer, Stage Manager, Prop Master & Costume Designer. Please email newhorizontheater@ yahoo.com w/ a short resume of experience & interest. Thru April 6. PITTSBURGH BALLET THEATER SCHOOL. Community auditions for children 5-8 years old who are interested in pursuing a Children’s Division scholarship for the 20142015 school year. The audition will consist of a basic dance class instructed by PBT School faculty members. No previous dance experience is required. Children must qualify for the Free and Reduced Lunch program to be considered for scholarships. Auditions April 11, 1:15-3:30pm. Call 412-454-9109 to register. 412-454-9109. POOR YORICK’S PLAYERS. Auditions for Shakespeare In The Park productions of The Tempest & The Winter’s Tale. Prepare one classical monologue of less than two minutes. Musicians & singers, prepare a song of up to one

minute. Cold readings. Tall Trees com) & submit payment by Amphitheater. April 11 & 12 by Aug. 1, 2015 for their work appt only. Call 412-277-2226. to be considered. Thru July 31. RENAISSANCE CITY CHOIR. 412-563-6712. The Renaissance City Choir BOULEVARD GALLERY & celebrates LGBTQ identity through DIFFERENT STROKES GALLERY. the unifying power of music. Searching for glass artists, fiber Professional training and/or artists, potters, etc. to compliment experience are not required. the exhibits for 2015 & 2016. Audition by appt. 412-345-1722. Booking for both galleries for Thru April 2. Shadyside 2017. Exhibits run from 1 to 2 Presbyterian Church, Shadyside. months. Ongoing. 412-721-0943. 412-682-4300. THE DAP CO-OP. Seeking SOUTH PARK THEATRE. Children’s performers & artists to participate Theatre Auditions for 2015. Ages in First Fridays - Art in a Box. 5-19. Cold readings from script. If For more information, email you are interested in a musical, you thedapcoopzumba@hotmail.com. will be asked to sing a little of your Ongoing. 412-403-7357. favorite song. No appointment GIRL GOV. Open to all girls necessary. Bring photo & resume. entering 9th-12th grade in the Fall April 11, 12-4pm. Bethel Park. of 2015 who live in southwestern 412-831-8552. PA. Girls will travel to Harrisburgh SPLIT STAGE PRODUCTIONS. to shadow gov. officials, Auditions for “The Full Monty”. learn about civics, advocacy, Please prepare two contrasting 32 philanthropy, community bar selections. Contemporary music involvement, youth organizing, theatre & pop-rock preferred. All women’s history & leadership. adults auditioning must attend Apply online. http://wgfpa.org/ a movement call. You may be what-we-do/activities/ asked to read/sing from girl-gov/ Deadline May 15. the script/score. April 11, THE HOUR 12-4 p.m. For an appt. AFTER HAPPY HOUR email splitstage@gmail. REVIEW. Seeking . w ww per com. Ongoing. submissions in all a p ty ci h pg Newlonsburg Presbyterian genres for fledgling .com Church. 724-327-0061. literary magazine UNREHEARSED SHAKEcurated by members of SPEARE PROJECT. Seeking the Hour After Happy Hour Non-AEA actors for multiple roles Writing Workshop. afterhappy in “Much Adoe About Nothing.” hourreview.com Ongoing. April 7, 5-9pm. Email head shot, INDEPENDENT FILM NIGHT. resume & preferred audition time Submit your film, 10 minutes or to auditions@unrehearsed less. Screenings held on the second shakespeareproject.com. Third Thursday of every month. Ongoing. Presbyterian Church, Shadyside. DV8 Espresso Bar & Gallery, THE WASHINGTON WILD Greensburg. 724-219-0804. THINGS. Seeking national anthem THE MT. LEBANON ARTISTS’ singers for the upcoming season. MARKET. Lookinf for artists for a Individuals & groups. Prepare a T-Shirt Design Contest for the 2015 traditional version of The National event. The winning design will be Anthem w/ minimal styling. Bring printed on T-Shirts to be sold at a recent photo & resume. Open this year’s market. The contest is auditions April 25, 11-1pm. Call open to everyone. For details visit 724-746-1178 to make an appt. http://www.cwpress.com/art-prep/. CONSOL Energy Park, Washington. Deadline May 15. THE NEW YINZER. Seeking original essays about literature, 28 WEST SECOND GALLERY & music, TV or film, & also essays STUDIO SPACE. Call for women generally about Pittsburgh. To artists. Accepting two-dimensional see some examples, visit www. & three-dimensional pieces by newyinzer.com & view the current for “THE NATURE OF THINGS” issue. Email all pitches, submissions All work must be gallery ready to & inquiries to newyinzer@gmail. hang. Please include 5 jpeg images com. Ongoing. of your work along w/ artist THE POET BAND COMPANY. statement & resume to: 28west Seeking various types of poetry. secondgallery@gmail.com. Thru Contact wewuvpoetry@hotmail. April 25. Greensburg. 724-205-9033. com Ongoing. ASSEMBLE. Open call for artists, SIDEWALL: A MURAL PROJECT. makers & technologists w/ work Submissions requested for a space related to new media art, process dedicated to showing works by art, design, architecture, science artists both local & abroad, creative & engineering, installation, collaborations, etc., w/ murals interaction & social engagement rotating the first Friday of for 2016 season of Unblurred. For every month. Apply at https:// more info www.assemblepgh.org. sidewallproject.wordpress.com. Thru April 26. Garfield. 412-432-9127. Thru May 1. sidewall, Bloomfield. THE AUTHORS’ ZONE. Accepting THE WRITERS’ PRESS POETRY submissions for the 2nd Annual CHAPBOOK COMPETITION. Open TAZ Awards, showcasing to new & emerging writers. No independent authors from theme restrictions. Prizes include Southwestern PA & beyond. publication w/ Createspace & Entrants must complete the online online distribution w/ Amazon & entry form (www.theauthorszone. Barnes & Noble. Thru May 30.

FULL LIST ONLINE

SUBMISSIONS


Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

I think my husband is addicted to porn. I find porn in his browser history almost every single day. He says I’m the only one he wants, but I find that hard to believe knowing he watches nonstop porn before fucking me. He also parties every time he goes on a business trip. Needless to say, I also suspect he cheats. He says he would never cheat on me because he “doesn’t need to.” But what does that mean? I think he is a liar. Every time I even try to bring anything up with him, it is flung back in my face because I cheated on him. He has the ultimate trump card. In his eyes, he can do no wrong because it will never be as bad as me having slept with someone else early in our relationship. Anyway, my question is mostly related to porn: Why does he watch it? I feel as though I am not enough. I am 29 and attractive. What should I do? WIFE IS FEELING ENTIRELY YUCKY

You should stop looking at your husband’s browser history. I have no way of knowing exactly what your husband means by “doesn’t need to [cheat],” WIFEY, but here’s the best-case scenario: You’re his only sex partner, he’s totally into you, but like all humans — including wife humans — he’s wired to desire a little variety and some novelty. No one is “enough” for anyone, and anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar. Which is not to say that everyone cheats (because not everyone does) or that cheating is OK (because it rarely is). But cheating is common enough that forgiving an isolated infidelity (or two) should be our default setting, not immediately lawyering up and filing for divorce. (And truly forgiving someone for cheating means not flinging it in her face during subsequent disputes.) Back to the best-case scenario: Your husband wants to have sex with other people (and so do you) but he doesn’t (and neither do you). Instead of cheating, WIFEY, your husband scratches that variety itch with porn. He pops into his favorite sites once or twice day, just like millions of other people, but he’s not cheating on you. (Unless you define viewing porn as cheating — in which case, good luck finding a man who won’t cheat on you.) I would advise you, again, to stop scouring his browser history for evidence of what you already know to be true — your husband is attracted to other people and sometimes looks at porn — and make up your mind to enjoy the effect porn has on your husband, i.e., it revs him up and stokes his desire for you. Now here’s the worst-case scenario: Your husband is cheating on you, perhaps during those business trips, and “doesn’t need to [cheat]” was an insincere blandishment. But absent some other compelling evidence of cheating — incriminating text messages, mysterious credit-card charges, brand-new STIs — you’re just going to have to take him at his word.

I’m 31 and have been with my husband for eight years, married last year, everything’s great — sex life included. But I have started a flirtation with a guy who lives next door. He can see into our kitchen, and I caught him watching me one day, and this was a huge turn-on for me. Now I wear sexy clothes when I’m home alone, and we stare at each other longingly. Sounds weird, I know, but it gets me so hot that sometimes I have to leave the room to masturbate! If anything, this has improved my sex life with my husband, as I feel sexier than ever. But my real worry is this: Am I being unfaithful? I’m really guilt-tripping myself about it. But then I think, what am I doing wrong? I’ve never even spoken to the “other man,” I’m in my own home, and I don’t intend to sleep with the neighbor. Is it possible to enjoy this flirtation in a way that I don’t feel like I’m betraying my husband? Do you think what I’m doing is risky?

blogh.pghcitypaper.com

The first hit is free. Actually, so are all the others.

WONDERING IF NEXT-DOOR OBSERVER WOUNDS SPOUSE

Let’s say you went to the beach to lie out because you get a secret thrill from getting checked out, WINDOWS, and then you took that sexual energy home and plowed it into your husband. That wouldn’t be a problem. Strangers at the beach make you feel attractive, feeling attractive makes you horny, feeling horny makes you wanna fuck the shit out of your husband. You win, your husband wins, and the strangers at the beach win. Everybody wins. There are two big differences between what’s going on in your kitchen and what went down on my hypothetical beach: proximity and regularity. You’re not going to see the same people at the beach again, WINDOWS, but your neighbor lives right next door. What happens when you finally and inevitably meet him face-toface? Hopefully nothing, but the odds of something are much higher. And running into your neighbor and not being able to resist the temptation is not the only risk you’re running: You don’t know anything about this guy. Your innocent flirtation could be his dangerous obsession — and one day, you could wake up to find him standing at the foot of your bed. But perhaps the minimal risks — you should be able to keep your hands off him, he’s unlikely to show up at the foot of your bed — are worth the very real rewards, i.e., an improved sex life with your husband. This whole thing might seem less like “cheating lite” if you could tell your husband about how much you enjoy teasing the neighbor and how hot it makes you — for your husband. Then instead of retreating to masturbate alone in another room after showing off in the kitchen, WINDOWS, you can retire to your bedroom and fuck the shit out of your waiting husband.

“INSTEAD OF CHEATING, YOUR HUSBAND SCRATCHES THAT VARIETY ITCH WITH PORN.”

On the Lovecast, how to talk to your kids about sex with Amy Lang: savagelovecast.com.

SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET AND FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST (DAN’S WEEKLY PODCAST) AT SAVAGELOVECAST.COM

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FOR THE WEEK OF

Free Will Astrology

04.01-04.08

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Choconiverous” is an English slang word that’s defined as having the tendency, when eating a chocolate Easter bunny, to bite the head off first. I recommend that you adopt this direct approach in everything you do in the coming weeks. Don’t get bogged down with preliminaries. Don’t get sidetracked by minor details, trivial distractions, or peripheral concerns. It’s your duty to swoop straight into the center of the action. Be clear about what you want and unapologetic about getting it.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The American snack cake known as a Twinkie contains 68 percent air. Among its 37 other mostly worthless ingredients are sugar, water, cornstarch, the emulsifier polysorbate 60, the filler sodium stearoyl lactylate and food coloring. You can’t get a lot of nutritious value by eating it. Now let’s consider the fruit known as the watermelon. It’s 91 percent water and six percent sugar. And yet it also contains a good amount of Vitamin C, lycopene and antioxidants, all of which are healthy for you. So if you are going to eat a whole lot of nothing, watermelon is a far better nothing than a Twinkie. Let that serve as an apt metaphor for you in the coming week.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You may be as close as you have ever gotten to finding the long-lost Holy Grail — or Captain Kidd’s pirate treasure, for that matter, or Marie Antoinette’s jewels, or Tinkerbell’s magical fairy dust, or the smoking-gun evidence that Shakespeare’s plays were written by Francis Bacon.

At the very least, I suspect you are ever-so-near to your personal equivalent of those precious goods. Is there anything you can do to increase your chances of actually getting it? Here’s one tip: Visualize in detail how acquiring the prize would inspire you to become even more generous and magnanimous than you already are.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): People are paying attention to you in new ways. That’s what you wanted, right? You’ve been emanating subliminal signals that convey messages like “Gaze into my eternal eyes” and “Bask in the cozy glow of my crafty empathy.” So now what? Here’s one possibility: Go to the next level. Show the even-more-interesting beauty that you’re hiding below the surface. You may not think you’re ready to offer the gifts you have been “saving for later.” But you always think that. I dare you to reveal more of your deep secret power.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Some people believe unquestioningly in the truth

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and power of astrology. They imagine it’s an exact science that can unfailingly discern character and predict the future. Other people believe all astrology is nonsense. They think that everyone who uses it is deluded or stupid. I say that both of these groups are wrong. Both have a simplistic, uninformed perspective. The more correct view is that some astrology is nonsense and some is a potent psychological tool. Some of it’s based on superstition and some is rooted in a robust mythopoetic understanding of archetypes. I encourage you to employ a similar appreciation for paradox as you evaluate a certain influence that is currently making a big splash in your life. In one sense, this influence is like snake oil, and you should be skeptical about it. But in another sense it’s good medicine that can truly heal.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): According to the Biblical stories, Peter was Christ’s closest disciple, but acted like a traitor when trouble came. After Christ was arrested, in the hours before the trial, Peter denied knowing his cherished teacher three different times. His fear trumped his love, leading him to violate his sacred commitment. Is there anything remotely comparable to that scenario developing in your own sphere, Virgo? If you recognize any tendencies in yourself to shrink from your devotion or violate your highest principles, I urge you to root them out. Be brave. Stay strong and true in your duty to a person or place or cause that you love.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Marketing experts say consumers need persistent prodding before they will open their minds to possibilities that are outside their entrenched habits. The average person has to be exposed to a new product at least eight times before it fully registers on his or her awareness. Remember this rule of thumb as you seek attention and support for your brainstorms. Make use of the art of repetition. Not just any old boring, tedious kind of repetition, though. You’ve got to be as sincere and fresh about presenting your goodies the eighth time as you were the first.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In Cole Porter’s song “I Get a Kick Out of You,” he testifies that he gets no kick from champagne. In fact, “Mere alcohol doesn’t thrill me at all,” he sings. The same is true about cocaine. “I’m sure that if I took even one sniff that would bore me terrifically, too,” Porter declares. With this as your nudge, Scorpio, and in accordance with the astrological omens, I encourage you to identify the titillations that no longer provide you with the pleasurable jolt they once did. Acknowledge the joys that have grown stale and the adventures whose rewards have waned. It’s time for you to go in search of a new array of provocative fun and games.

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56

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The English writer William Wordsworth (17701830) wrote hundreds of poems. Among his most famous was “I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud,” which is also known as “Daffodils.” The poem sprung from him after a walk he took with his sister around Lake Ullswater in the English Lake District. There they were delighted to find a long, thick belt of daffodils growing close to the water. In his poem, Wordsworth praises the “ten thousand” flowers that were “Continuous as the stars that shine / And twinkle on the milky way.” If you are ever going to have your own version of a daffodil explosion that inspires a burst of creativity, Sagittarius, it will come in the coming weeks.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Your subconscious desires and your conscious desires seem to be at odds. What you say you want is not in precise alignment with what your deep self wants. That’s why I’m worried that “Don’t! Stop!” might be close to morphing into “Don’t stop!” — or vice versa. It’s all pretty confusing. Who’s in charge here? Your false self or your true self? Your wounded, conditioned, habit-bound personality or your wise, eternal, ever-growing soul? I’d say it’s a good time to retreat into your sanctuary and get back in touch with your primal purpose.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Sometimes you’re cool, but other times you’re hot. You veer from acting aloof and distracted to being friendly and attentive. You careen from bouts of laziness to bursts of disciplined efficiency. It seems that you’re always either building bridges or burning them, and on occasion you are building and burning them at the same time. In short, Aquarius, you are a master of vacillation and a slippery lover of the in-between. When you’re not completely off-target and out of touch, you’ve got a knack for wild-guessing the future and seeing through the false appearances that everyone else regards as the gospel truth. I, for one, am thoroughly entertained!

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): How can you ripen the initiatives you have set in motion in recent weeks? Of the good new trends you have launched, which can you now install as permanent enhancements in your daily rhythm? Is there anything you might do to cash in on the quantum leaps that have occurred, maybe even figure out a way to make money from them? It’s time for you to shift from being lyrically dreamy to fiercely practical. You’re ready to convert lucky breaks into enduring opportunities. Before bed on the next five nights, remember everything that happened during the day. Do it with compassion and objectivity. Testify at FreeWillAstrology.com.

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700


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3XEOLF$OOLHV5HFHLYH Â&#x2021;0RQWKO\VWLSHQGRI Â&#x2021;$FFHVVWR+HDOWK&DUHDQG&KLOG&DUH Â&#x2021;$Q(GXFDWLRQ$ZDUGRIWRSD\VWXGHQWORDQV

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J&S Glass

FOR TOBACCO USE ONLY

FOR SALE

MUSIC

81/2&.<285327(17,$/

35(3$5()25 <285)8785(

3URJUDPUXQVIURP $SSOLFDQWVPXVWEHDWOHDVW\HDUVROGKDYHDKLJKVFKRRO GLSORPDRU*('E\DQGHOLJLEOHWRZRUNLQWKH86

(Weather & Conditions Permitting)

+

Student Discount w/valid ID - Public Parking Located behind bldg

3XEOLF$OOLHVDUHSODFHGLQDIXOOWLPHSDLGDSSUHQWLFHVKLSZLWKD ORFDOQRQSURÂżWRUJDQL]DWLRQDWWHQGUHJXODUVNLOOEXLOGLQJDQGOHDGHUVKLS GHYHORSPHQWVHVVLRQVZLWKDFRKRUWRIRWKHUSDUWLFLSDQWVDQGUHFHLYH SURIHVVLRQDOGHYHORSPHQWFRDFKLQJDORQJWKHZD\

Contact the Central Park OfďŹ ce at 412-350-2478 to obtain forms and additional information. Forms and driving directions may also be obtained from the Parks Department Home Page @ www.alleghenycounty.us/parks

M A I N F E AT U R E

20% off Glass with this Add 2

1918 191 19 18 Murray Ave 412-422-6361 636 63 361 6

DISH TV Starting at $19.99/month (for 12 mos.) SAVE! Regular Price $32.99 Call Today and Ask About FREE SAME DAY Installation! CALL Now! 888992-1957 (AAN CAN)

June 6, 2015

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Best Service, Selection and Prices in Town! Be n!

800 sq. ft. office or studio for rent. Newly renovated. Free off street parking. McKees Rocks business district. $800/mo. includes heat. 412-585-4108

OPENING DATE FOR 2015 SWIMMING SEASON:

NEWS

GLASS

OFFICE SPACE

(AGE 16 & OVER) Needed during the 2015 Swimming Season at Allegheny County facilities in Boyce, North, South, and Settlers Cabin Parks. Interested applicants are required to complete an Aquatics Examination given on Saturday April 4, 2015 at 9:00 a.m. At the NORTH ALLEGHENY SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL, 10375 PERRY HIGHWAY, WEXFORD, PA. 15090

J&S

CLASSES

$369,000 Search YouTube for Wilkin Regent Square

Water Pipes, Glass And Vapes

PREGNANT? THINKING OF ADOPTION? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families Nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abbyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-4136293. Void in Illinois/New Mexico/Indiana (AAN CAN)

Expenses Paid Karen and Steve

Now a recording studio on ďŹ rst ďŹ&#x201A;oor with loft apartment on second.

Specializing in Roor, Hisi, Pulse, Pyrology, Hitman, Medicali, Sky

412-403-6069

1-800-474-6015

LIFEGUARDS is currently seeking

starting @ $150/mo. Many sizes available, no sec deposit, play @ the original and largest practice facility, 24/7 access.

GRAND RE-OPENING!

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WEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;RE HIRING! Get more when you shop here. Be more when you work here. ALDI is as much about being smart with money, as it is saving our customers money. Being smart with money means paying great people great wages. Plus SURYLGLQJWHUUL¿FEHQH¿WVDQGRIIHULQJSOHQW\RIRSSRUWXQLWLHVWRDGYDQFHWKHLUFDUHHU ,IVKRSSLQJDW$/',PHDQV\RXUPRQH\ZRUNVKDUGHUZRUNLQJDW$/',PHDQV\RXU KDUGZRUNJHWV\RXPRUH*UHDWSD\WHUUL¿FEHQH¿WVDQGDGYDQFHPHQWRSSRUWXQLWLHV â&#x20AC;&#x201C; youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be more and get more with ALDI.

Apply in person at either of the following locations or visit: aldistorejobs.com for more information

FULL-TIME CALL CENTER REPRESENTATIVES (LOAN COUNSELORS)

Store Associates-$11.50/Hr-$12.50/Hr

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Generous Compensation: Â&#x2021;&RPSHWLWLYHZDJHVÂ&#x2021; N SODQZLWKPDWFKLQJFRQWULEXWLRQ

â&#x20AC;¢ 12PM-9PM Shift â&#x20AC;¢ $11.50/Hour + $1.00 Shift differential

Paid Time Off: Â&#x2021;)LUVWZHHNSDLGYDFDWLRQDIWHUPRQWKVZLWKWKHFRPSDQ\Â&#x2021;6HYHQSDLGKROLGD\V Â&#x2021;6LFNDQGSHUVRQDOGD\V

Hiring Event For ALL our stores in the Greater Pittsburgh area

7KXUVGD\$SULOWKÂ&#x2021;DPSP Marriott Pittsburgh North At Cranberry Woods 100 Cranberry Woods Drive Cranberry Twp., PA 16066

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Paid Training, 8AM- 5PM Medical Benefits Regular Pay Increases Tuition Reimbursement Visit PHEAA.org/jobs to apply. PHEAA IS AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY EMPLOYER

$/',LVDQ(TXDO2SSRUWXQLW\(PSOR\HU

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015


HE IS RISEN

{BY BRENDAN EMMETT QUIGLEY / WWW.BRENDANEMMETTQUIGLEY.COM}

STUDIES

STUDIES

DIABETES?

WOMEN W/ LOW SEX DESIRE

Call Preferred Primary Care Physicians at

412-650-6155

CALL CTRS!

412.363.1900 STUDIES

ALZHEIMER DISEASE MILD TO MODERATE

FREE MEMORY SCAN CALL CTRS!

412.363.1900

SmokING STUDY University of Pittsburgh

Smokers who want to try new cigarettes that may or may not lead to reduced smoking are wanted for a research study. This is NOT a treatment or smoking cessation study. Compensation will be provided. Evening Appointments Available For more information please call The Nicotine & Tobacco Research Lab at

412-624-9999

ACROSS 1. Nana’s fellow 7. “Make ___ for Ducklings” 10. Civil rights org. 14. Eaglets’ shelters 15. Burning anger 16. Baseball team that plays in the shadows of the CN Tower 17. Health scare of 2002-’03 18. Fruity wine, briefly 19. City 30 miles north of Des Moines 20. Tabby perched atop an IRS return? 23. From the top 24. His Twitter handle is @SHAQ 25. Head of Chelsea 27. Film ratings for the whole family 28. Kernel holder 30. The Ivies, e.g. 32. “The Late Late Show” host Corden 34. Traffic directors 35. Cassette emporium? 38. Baker’s tin 39. Cards of tomorrow 40. Playful pond slider 41. Phillies’ div. 42. Wee, in Scotland 45. Bud 46. Chunk of grass 50. Clock setting, for short

51. Paranoid Labour opponent? 55. Call to a scalawag 56. “Mob Wives” wife “Big ___” Raiola 57. Office reminder “sticky” 58. Have a problem with one’s sister, say? 59. Whole slew 60. “Problem” singer Grande 61. Cruised 62. Hunting permit application datum: Abbr. 63. Church maintenance man

DOWN

22. Ukulele standard 26. Takes too much junk, briefly 28. Lies, damned lies, but not statistics 29. It could be bad news 31. “Nobody ‘___ You” (Bob Dylan) 32. Practical joke 33. “Another” caller 34. ___-Alt-Del 35. Crisp snack served with hummus 36. Go nuts 37. Orange soda 38. Really jump off the page 42. Strafed 43. Spanish wool

1. Thing unscrewed at the pump 2. Put up again, as art 3. Mountain ridges 4. Kitty’s cry 5. Anne McCaffrey’s “Dragonriders of ___” 6. “___ often is the case ...” 7. Get wrinkled with age 8. Come up 9. Gossipy gal 10. Hector’s archenemy 11. Tight pants giveaway 12. Caustic cleaners 13. ___ Ronald Reagan (carrier) 21. “Check,” in poker

NEWS

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M A I N F E AT U R E

SMOKERS WANTED

44. “The Valley of Amazement” author 47. “Check,” in poker 48. Looping video clips that are only a few seconds long 49. Word with grinder and donor 50. When some dinner parties start 52. Target of some “I Can’t Breathe” protests 53. Some auditors, for short 54. Era in some fairy tales 55. Ice Bucket Challenge cause, briefly {LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS}

for Paid Psychology Research

to participate in a research project at Carnegie Mellon University! To be eligible for this study, you must be: • 18-50 yrs. old • In good health • Willing to not smoke or use nicotine products before one session You may earn up to $50 for your participation in a 3 hour study. For more information, call: The Behavioral Health Research Lab (412-268-3029) NOTE: Unfortunately, our lab is not wheelchair accessible.

Are you interested in a research study of a new investigational birth control patch?

About the SECURE Study The Center for Family Planning Research is recruiting women to join a large clinical research study of an investigational contraceptive patch. The investigational patch contains the same type of hormones that are in many birth control pills. The patch is designed to be flexible and is applied onto the skin, just once a week. Study contraceptive patches and all study check-ups will be provided at no cost to you. You will be compensated up to $590 for your participation. If you would like to learn more, please call the

Center for Family Planning Research at: 412-641-5496 or visit www.birthcontrolstudies.org +

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Clinical Research Opportunity for Women Do you suffer from uterine fibroids? DO YOU EXPERIENCE? • Heavy or abnormal periods • Abdominal pain and pressure • Increased need to urinate with your periods

UTERINE FIBROIDS • Negatively impact your quality of life • Doctors in your area are looking for women to participate in a clinical research study. • All investigational medication and study-related care is provided at no cost. Compensation for time and travel may be available. To see if you qualify, visit

www.VenusResearchStudy.com or call

(800) 216-2057

60

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015


Judy’s Oriental Massage GRAND OPENING!

FULL BODY MASSAGE $40/hr

MASSAGE

MASSAGE

Downtown

Aming’s Massage Therapy

$40/hour

$10 Coupon with this ad

Open 24 hours

412-401-4110 322 Fourth Ave.

412-595-8077

4126 William Penn Hwy, Murrysville, PA 15668

4972 Library Road, Bethel Park

Across the street from Howard Hanna’s

(in Hillcrest Shopping Center)

724-519-2950

MASSAGE

MASSAGE

Grand Opening

Bodywork by Cindy Chinese Massage, Sauna & Table Shower 9:30am-10:30pm 7777 McKnight Road Pgh, PA 15237

412-366-7130

Asian 888 Massage Chinese Massage • $39.99/Hr. 412-349-8628

Grandng Openi

GENERAL HELP

MASSAGE

Start your humanitarian career! Change the lives of others while creating a sustainable future. 1,6,9, 18 month programs available. Apply today! www.OneWorldCenter. org 269-591-0518 info@ oneworldcenter.org

Xin Sui Bodyworks

GENERAL FOR SALE Get CABLE TV, INTERNET & PHONE with FREE HD Equipment and install for under $3 a day! Call Now! 866-353-6916

1744 Greensburg Pike, North Versailles, 15137

$49.99/ hour Free Vichy Shower with 1HR or more body work 2539 Monroeville Blvd Ste 200 Monroeville, PA 15146 Next to Twin Fountain Plaza

412-335-6111

TIGER SPA

GRAND OPENING!!! Best of the Best in Town! 420 W. Market St., Warren, OH 44481 76 West, 11 North, 82 West to Market St. 6 lights and make a left. 1/4 mile on the left hand side.

Open 9am-12 midnight 7 days a week! Licensed Professionals Dry Sauna, Table Shower, Deep Tissue, Swedish

330-373-0303 Credit Cards Accepted

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Positive Recovery Solutions Dedicated to improving the lives of those with addiction issues by utilizing modern advancements in medical, clinical and pharmacological modalities. ~ Suboxone© ~ Zubsolv© ~ Vivitrol© NOW TAKING PATIENTS Call Today Toll Free 855-344-7501 Located at 730 Brookline Blvd. Pittsburgh, PA. 15226

Recovery Without Judgement

Migraines COPD Diabetes High Cholestrol If you suffer from any of the following please call PPCP at 412-650-6155

JADE Wellness Center

NEW LOCATION

SUBOXONE TREATMENT

IN WEXFORD, PA

WE SPECIALIZE IN

Premiere Outpatient Drug and Alcohol Treatment OFF OF PERRY HIGHWAY

NOW OPEN & ACCEPTING HIGHMARK

Family Owned and Operated Treating: Alcohol, Opiates, Heroin and More

• SUBOXONE • VIVITROL - a new once a month injection for alcohol and opiate dependency • Group and Individualized Therapy • New Partial Hospitalization Program

NO WAIT LIST Accepts all major insurances and medical assistance MONROEVILLE, PA

412-380-0100 www.myjadewellness.com

Painkiller and Heroin Addiction Treatment IMMEDIATE APPOINTMENTS AVAILABLE

Pregnant? We can treat you!

Problem with Opiates? Prescription Medication or Heroin?

Help is Available! R

Suboxone

Effective treatment for Opiate addiction NOW AVAILABLE at TWO PITTSBURGH LOCATIONS

Immediate Appointments Available

Acute Partial Program

Pittsburgh

Methadone - 412-255-8717 Suboxone - 412-281-1521 info@summitmedical.biz

Individual and Group Counseling

Outpatient Program Most Insurances and Medical Assistance Accepted

Conveniently Located on Bus Line Pittsburgh Outpatient 306 Penn Ave. (412) 436-4659

South Side Outpatient 2100 Wharton St. (412) 481-1922 For more information, call 24 hours

1-888-694-9996

www.pyramidhealthcarepa.com

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Pittsburgh South Hills

Methadone - 412-488-6360 info2@alliancemedical.biz

Beaver County

Methadone - 724-857-9640 Suboxone - 724-448-9116 info@ptsa.biz

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 04.01/04.08.2015

• INSURANCES ACCEPTED • DAY & EVENING APPOINTMENTS AVAILABLE CLOSE TO SOUTH HILLS, WASHINGTON, CANONSBURG, CARNEGIE, AND BRIDGEVILLE

Let Us Help You Today!

412-221-1091 info@freedomtreatment.com


A GUIDE TO THE WORLD’S WORST BASEBALL MEMORABILIA AUCTIONS {BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

LAST WEEK, Pirates centerfielder Andrew McCutchen shocked the sports world when he decided to cut

his hair and auction off the 44 braids, along with an autographed baseball, for charity. Doing anything for charity is great and we love Cutch as much as the next person does. But if we’re being honest, this is kind of gross and a little scary: People are bidding on hair from a man’s head. Also, we believe there is a remote possibility that the division-rival Cardinals will bid on McCutchen’s hair, extract the DNA and field a team of Cutches, to deny us the division title. So in honor of McCutchen’s haircut, here is a list of five more horrible baseball memorabilia auctions throughout history. The descriptions are taken directly from the auction catalog of the prestigious Farnsworth Auction House of New York, Paris and Blawnox. (Editor’s Note: This issue is published on April 1 and the legitimacy of the following “auctions” is therefore suspect at best.) C D E I T C H@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

DEREK BELL’S HOUSEBOAT

OWN A PIECE OF ROGER CLEMENS

For a starting bid of $12,000, you can own the houseboat that former Pirates outfielder Derek Bell called home. Bell was a oneof-a-kind talent playing at levels so low that fans forgot about the $22 gajillion paid to former horrific infielder Pat Meares. Bell was the architect of Operation Shutdown, and Pittsburgh sports-talk host Mark Madden declared, “Derek Bell is the ultimate Pirate: He lives on a boat and steals money.” Now, that boat can be yours.

Who doesn’t want to train like one of the greatest starting pitchers in the history of the game? With a starting bid of just $2,500, you can get your hands on Brian McNamee’s hypodermic needle containing steroids and the DNA of Roger Clemens. It comes in the beer can and FedEx box where it was stored for six years until handed over to federal prosecutors. Don’t misremember to place your bids early.

SID BREAM’S 30 PIECES OF SILVER

Former first-baseman Sid Bream was a Pittsburgh favorite when he played for the Pirates from 1985 to 1990. He left the team as a free agent and signed with the Atlanta Braves. However, his greatest betrayal to the City of Champions came during Game 7 of the 1992 National League Championship Series, when he scored the winning run in a play that forever became known as “The Slide.” That night, Bream was labeled a “Judas” by drunken fans across the city. For a starting bid of just $100, you can own the 30 pieces of silver that Bream received for selling out the Pirates and dooming them to 20-straight losing seasons. The winning bidder will also receive a handsome, tear-stained bobblehead re-creation of “The Slide” once owned by former Pirates catcher Mike Lavalliere.

RYAN BRAUN’S URINE SAMPLE AND FEDEX RECEIPT

PETE ROSE’S BRONZE HALL OF FAME PLAQUE

This glorious specimen was created on Sept. 12, 1985, one day after Pete Rose recorded hit No. 4,192, becoming baseball’s all-time hits king. Then-Hall of Fame director Bill Loney explains: “We were putting in an order anyway and thought, ‘Even with our ridiculous rules and uptight voters, this guy is a lock.’” On Aug. 24, 1989, Rose was indefinitely suspended from baseball for sports gambling, including making wagers on his own team. Auction also includes Rose’s likeness memorialized on another piece of metal — a can of vintage “Pete Chocolate-Flavored Drink.”

A year before he actually served a suspension for using performance-enhancing drugs in 2013, Ryan Braun beat the rap by arguing that his urine sample could have been tampered with while it was sitting in the refrigerator of tester Dino Laurenzi Jr. for three days before it was sent for testing via FedEx.

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TABLE ACTION THAT NEVER STOPS THERE’S ALWAYS SOMETHING GOING ON AT OUR TABLES, LIKE:

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GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER. Must be 21 years or older to be on Rivers Casino property.

Profile for Pittsburgh City Paper

April 1, 2015  

Pittsburgh City Paper Pirates Preview 2015 Volume 25 Issue 13

April 1, 2015  

Pittsburgh City Paper Pirates Preview 2015 Volume 25 Issue 13