jb’s2cents
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t’s so funny how people get offended when I say I’m the shit. It’s called positive reinforcement, people. Confidence is a good thing. Seriously, what do you expect me to say in this column? Expose my weaknesses, my flaws, in a public forum? Do you really think I’m gonna write about my failures and insecurities and give anyone in the world easy ammunition to use against me? I’m not a pessimist, I’m just a realist. The more success or fame or money or anything you achieve, the more people are out to take your spot. Life is war, and the less your enemies know, the better.
10 Things I’m Hatin’ On By Roland “Lil Duval” Powell
Disclaimer: This is really what everybody else is sayin’. I know I’m dead wrong, but I’m hating anyway.
1. Niggas Getting They Tax Refund If you get your tax refund on Friday and Monday morning you’re broke again, you need to be shot repeatedly. 2. Jacki-O I don’t know who talked you into that bankruptcy shit, but they’re dumber than a bitch. Now you really ain’t gonna be able to get shit. All they can do is take your shit, which is what they were gonna do anyway. You should never file bankruptcy, but if you have to, make sure it’s for millions not for damn thousands.
Drama, me, and Khaled “Hustlin’” in Miami
3. The Ol’ Lady That Had A Baby At 62 Is she thinking about her child? How is she gonna balance dialysis and P.T.A.? 4. Record Labels I’m hating on record labels for signing more people than they put out. Stop using rappers for tax write-offs! 5. Street Teams Would you please stop tryin’ to give me a damn flyer before I go in the club? Ain’t nobody gonna read that shit. Just tell me what’s on the flyer you’re promoting. 6. Waffle House Teeth There’s no excuse for your teeth to be fucked up, especially if you’re wearing diamonds. Some people don’t even know their teeth are fucked up. if the dentist has to be put to sleep just to clean up your teeth, you’ve got Waffle House teeth. 7. All Star Weekend We black people need to get our priorities together. I know this nigga that went to Houston and paid $100 to $200 every night to get in all the clubs to ball out. When Monday came around he missed his flight to go home so AirTran told him he would have to pay $125 to change his flight. This nigga called me talking about, “Man, AirTran got me fucked up.” 8. Reverends and Ministers Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think my preacher should know more rap music than me. It just didn’t feel right when I heard this preacher say that he’s not a “Window Shopper.” 9. B.E.T.’s Road Show Does B.E.T. actually believe that people enjoy that shit? 10. Anybody That’s Still Combing Their Hair Backwards
Yung Joc, me, and Rico in Houston
See, y’all act like I’m a rapper or something. Just because I say I’m the greatest, everybody thinks I’m taking shots at them. Well, anyone who’s ever met me knows that I’m a smart ass to begin with. So if you don’t appreciate sarcasm you won’t understand. During All Star weekend, I heard that some label rep was talking shit about me at a club, and I happened to run into him the next day at Pappadeaux. So I asked him why he doesn’t like me, and he started quoting entire sections of my editorials word for word. See? Even the haters are OZONE readers and that’s why, once again, I must say that I’M THE SHIT. Okay, I am done with my “hater” rant for this issue. But it’s hard out here for a pimp, for real. Do you know how amazing it is that I’ve made it four years in this shit without having a nervous breakdown, pulling my hair out, killing someone, killing myself, or just plain quitting? Seriously, I’ve got stories for days. And half of them, I won’t tell you (for the reasons listed above). But all jokes aside, I’m really blessed to have made it this far. For one, anyone who’s ever put out a magazine or attempted to put out a magazine can tell you that it is expensive. The fact that I started this with nothing (I slept in the first office for two weeks straight when my power was out. Real shit. Told you I have stories for days) and can still afford to put out our 45th issue is amazing.
I can’t count how many times I was ready to quit because I needed “x” amount of dollars, and when I mentally hit my lowest point, the phone would ring with someone wanting to buy an ad for that exact amount. Although I work my ass off and I guess I’m pretty good at what I do, I can’t claim responsibility for that. It’s happened so many times that I have to conclude that someone upstairs wants me to be in this position. They say God works in mysterious ways, Ashley, Malik, me, right? So maybe that means a drug dealer buying an ad so I can Gary, Churd, and Chill pay rent? Or maybe me driving four hours to pick up an ad deposit in Houston from a makeshift brothel at 2 AM and heading straight to the printer to pay for magazines (yes, it happened)? Don’t get it twisted though. I’m not rich yet. The funny thing is, I really don’t care. That’s not what it’s about. Okay, you get some money: you buy cars, jewelry, clothes, houses, and then..... ? It’s really not about the end result for me. It’s the process of getting there. It’s looking back to where you were a year ago and seeing how far you’ve come. It’s about growth and new experiences; becoming more efficient and perfecting your talents. So looking back one year, two years, three years, four years - I feel like a totally different person. Sometimes you get so caught up in the daily grind that you forget what you were working towards in the first place. Wanna hear something funny? I was searching my email archives the other day, and came across messages I’d sent to a newspaper editor looking for freelance work in 2002. At the time, I had just started OZONE, and was also freelancing for The Source. He asked me what my goal was with OZONE. My email reply was, “Either to get a job at The Source, or to become their main competitor, whichever happens first.” - Julia Beverly, jb@ozonemag.com
Big K.R.I.T. “Just Touched Down” T.I. “Why U Wanna Do Dat” T-Pain f/ everybody “I’m In Luv” remix LL Cool J f/ Jennifer Lopez “Control Myself” Yung Joc “It’s Goin’ Down” Chamillionaire f/ Bun B “Picture Perfect” Bun B f/ Ludacris “Trill Recognize Trill” Triple J “Platinum”
jb’splaylist U.S.D.A. “Burning Up” Rick Ross “Hustlin’” Keyshia Cole “Love” Paul Wall “Girl”
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