jb’s2cents
10 Things I’m Hatin’ On By Roland “Lil Duval” Powell
F
Disclaimer: This is really what everybody else is sayin’. I know I’m dead wrong, but I’m hating anyway.
or those of you who don’t know, this magazine takes its name from the city of Orlando, Florida. “Ozone” was adopted on the underground circuit as a slang term for the city by rappers tired of hearing corny radio announcers refer to it as “Jamlando” or “O-Town.”
1. Male Groupies You already know the first one. First and foremost, I’m hating on male groupies. There’s no reason why a man should like me more than a woman.
Three and a half years ago, I was having lunch with Ruff, the leader of the Warhedz (Orlando’s version of the WuTang Clan). At the time, we were planning to do a TV show together, and Ruff suggested the name OZONE. The show never materialized because our third “partner,” some useless fuck whose name I honestly can’t remember, held the hours of footage I’d filmed for a $300 ransom. It was too high of a price tag for me at the time, so I adopted the name for my new magazine instead. Today, I think it’s safe to say OZONE has come further than anyone, myself included, anticipated.
2. People Who Ask Me To Tell Jokes If one more person comes up to me and asks me to tell them a joke, I’m gonna slap the shit outta them. That’s like me coming up to you asking you to do your job while you at the club. 3. Broke Females and Broke Dudes I’m hating on females acting siditty in the club, wearing expensive clothes and carrying expensive purses. Then they walk outside to their raggedy-ass car. I’m also hating on dudes that go to the club and spend their whole paycheck on a bottle of Moet, but they’re still walking around with an empty glass of champagne.
Lil Jon and I in Miami
4. Niggas With Fake Dreads I’m hatin’ on any nigga that got fake dreads in their hair. 5. The Homeless Guy I’m hating on the black homeless man who found a lotto ticket in the garbage and won millions. I’m also hating on the cracker who threw that ticket away and asked for the shit back. 6. Halle Berry I’m hating on Halle Berry for trying to find a sperm donor. Shit, I’m right here. I donate sperm to my damn sock every day. 7. Martha Stewart I’m hating on Martha Stewart. How can she go to jail and still be a damn millionaire when she gets out? That shit won’t happen for a nigga. 8. Punk’d I’m hating on Punk’d because it was only supposed to be on for two seasons. It’s been seven or eight seasons now. Why are niggas still falling for that shit? 9. Ray J and Superhead I’m hating on Ray J for being the only person happy to be mentioned in that Confessions of a Video Vixen book, just because she said he was good in bed. He’s the only dude stupid enough to make that hoe his girlfriend while she was fuckin’ all the rest of these niggas. And I’m hating on her for making millions. I guess being a hoe does pay off. 10. Terrell Owens I’m hating on T.O., not because of what he said, but because he isn’t being a man and accepting what he said. Them crackers told him they wanted their money back, and now he’s coppin’ pleas. Nigga, you my dawg, but suck it up. This is a prime example of how we don’t run shit. Run, monkey, run! No matter how much money you got, in the white folks’ eyes, we still broke.
Me and Webbie in Orlando
With that said… I feel like I’ve outgrown Orlando. It’s kind of sad. It’s that feeling you get when you know a relationship is over but you just can’t let go. You don’t wanna keep dragging yourself through the same bullshit over and over again, but at the same time, your sentimental side isn’t ready to close the chapter. I’m not saying that I’m moving. I’m not even sure what I’m saying. The only thing I know is that I put my blinders on and focused and worked my ass off, and I looked up one day and everything had changed. I feel out of place here. To continually move forward you have to continually surround yourself with like-minded people. And although Orlando is not at all what most people perceive it to be - Disney World - it is also not a fast-paced city with lots of motivated entrepreneurs to watch and learn.
I tried moving to Miami. And honestly, Miami didn’t do it for me either. I felt isolated. And once you’ve been on the road for a while, it’s hard to stay in one place for any length of time without getting bored. I’m naturally a nomad. So sometimes I wonder, why do I always come back to Orlando? Of course, I already know the answer. It’s my comfort zone. I don’t have to go out and meet anyone, because everyone already knows me. There’s no challenge. There’s no excitement. It’s just so easy. I feel like there’s nothing more I could accomplish here. And this isn’t a knock on Orlando, it’s true of any situation. Being in your comfort zone is E-Feezy, me, and DJ Paul not always a good thing because you have no reason to push yourself. Sometimes you have to put yourself in a position where you are forced to work, forced to meet new people, and forced to break new ground. Next comes the paradox. Local love gradually turns into local hate. The bigger the magazine gets, the more local artists grumble that we’re not reppin’ Orlando. But the standards have to be higher now because we’re reaching a broader audience. We always rep for the hometeam, but that doesn’t mean we have to feature whack artists just because they’re from Orlando. That’s like me asking you to run an ad just because we’re from the same city. Artists spend money with the magazine because they gain visibility from it. It’s not for charity. This is a business. The truth is, many local artists don’t work hard enough to deserve a feature in OZONE, or any other magazine, because they’re too comfortable. You have to put in work, just like I put in work. It’s often been said in Orlando that the city is a “training ground.” It certainly was for me, and I suppose that’s true of any small/medium sized city. Another saying goes, “If you can make it in New York, you can make it anywhere,” but fuck, last week lil’ ol’ “OZONE” got shout outs on Hot 97, Rap City, and 106th & Park. You can make it from anywhere if you’re driven enough, as long as you don’t get too comfortable along the way. - Julia Beverly, jb@ozonemag.com
T-Pain f/ Tego Calderon “Como Esta” Juelz Santana f/ Young Jeezy & Lil Wayne “Make It Work” Spider Loc f/ 50 Cent & Lloyd Banks “Things Change” Bun B f/ Trey Songz, Mike Jones, & Baby “Hold You Down” Lyfe f/ Fantasia “Hypothetically (remix)” Gwen Stefani f/ Slim Thug “Luxurious” Rich Boy f/ Pitbull “Get To Poppin’ (remix)” Chamillionaire f/ Krayzie Bone “Ridin’”
jb’splaylist 50 Cent “Hustler’s Ambition” Young Cash f/ T-Pain “Swang” Rasheeda “Georgia Peach” Ray J “One Wish” OZONE
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