Ozone Mag #65 - Mar 2008

Page 39

The Green Movement

And we ain’t talkin’ Al Gore BY SJ BROWN

Fuck the corner boy and his paltry dime bags, you’re going to start your own home-grown garden of quality lah. But replacing your shrubs for shrooms? You might be asking for more than you can smoke; there’s plenty cause to reconsider converting your terrace into the Ganja of Eden—like jail time, getting your stash robbed or giving the local fire department a serious case of the munchies. Read up on these people who got caught up making their crib too green.

SMOKE UP Gresham, Oregon - February 2008

Herb Phi Herb New Brunswick, NEW JERSEY - June 1998

Firefighters breathed in so much marijuana that they would have failed a drug test while spending more than a half hour battling a home fire which burned 907 kilos of ganja. More than 35 firefighters battled the blaze.

Maybe frats have learned something over the past ten years: Bring chicks, bring alcohol, but don’t grow weed in the fraternity house. Too bad for Rutgers’s Beta Theta Pi, who were busted growing 30 marijuana plants in the frat house attic. The chapter was closed.

http://www.katu.com/news/13934252.html

http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9504 E1D7103CF937A15755C0A96E958260&partner=rssnyt& emc=rss

Edinburg, Texas - June 2007

Neighbors said they smelled burning plastic, but not the case. Not only did dude’s crib catch on fire, but so did the 50 marijuana plants he had inside. http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=54227&in_page_id=2

The Grow Me State Lehigh Acres, FlORIDA - November 2007

MariJuana and a Happy New Year Norwich, England - December 2004

This 25-year–old thought it was a jolly idea to disguise his marijuana as a Christmas tree. The po po’s didn’t buy it and he had to pay up £145 (about $300). http://www.hightimes.com/ht/news/content. php?bid=1117&aid=10

Florida is second to Cali in marijuana grow houses. So it’s no surprise that the sunshine state is home to a bevy of suburban muthafuckers itching for their slice of Scarface decadence. Case in point: A 44-year-old Cuban man from Miami went straight Tony Montana on the po po after a botched weed deal at his crib. Lucky for him the cops didn’t murk his ass for shooting several rounds of ammunition at them. Instead they found 50 marijuana plants worth $195,000, a hydroponic irrigation system, lighting equipment, cooling fans, and power converters, according to the Miami New Times. Off to jail he went. http://www.miaminewtimes.com/2007-11-08/news/ marijuana-goes-upstate/

The Real OC EAST COUNTY, CALIFORNIA - JANUARY 2008

Detectives apprehended over 6,000 marijuana plants estimated at $10 million in addition to several hundred thousand dollars in cultivation gear and handguns from homes in the otherwise pristine neighborhoods of Antioch, Bethel Island, Brentwood and Oakley, California.

Dumbest Mother Fucker Award Wichita, KanSAS - DecEMBER 2006

This nigga called 911 to report that he’d been robbed of $1,100 of weed that he’d been planning to sell. Clearly this idiot was jailed on several charges. http://www.foxnews.com/wires/2006Dec11/ 0,4670,StolenDrugs,00.html

High SChool Greeley, Colorado - March 2006

Education doesn’t always afford common sense. A 22-year-old college student was accused of growing four 3-foot marijuana plants in his closet while the maintenance crew was performing an annual inspection. He was ordered to pay a $10,000 bond—certainly not what his student budgeted ass needed. Any nigga in the hood knows that you need to keep a close eye on the super’s henchmen, otherwise known as maintenance (especially if you live in Section 8 housing). http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/8167109/detail.html

38 // OZONE MAG


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