THE COMPASSIOnATE FRIEnDS

Janet Neal / Outreach Coordinator / Modesto Area Chapter of the Compassionate Friends

You need not walk alone. Those words are the heartfelt motto of The Compassionate Friends, a peer-to-peer support organization which provides understanding, comfort, and hope to families after the death of a child, grandchild or sibling. The death of a son or daughter, at any age, devastates and isolates parents and siblings. Supporting them is vital.

The Compassionate Friends started in England 50 years ago when a chaplain brought together two sets of parents who were each grieving the loss of a child. He realized that they were able to understand and support each other in ways he could not. The Compassionate Friends incorporated as a nonprofit organization in the U.S. in 1978. Today, there are over 600 local chapters throughout the U.S., and associated chapters in 30 countries around the world. There is no religious affiliation. The local chapters are led by parents and adult siblings who serve on the steering committee.

Our Modesto Area chapter was established in 2009. We meet on the second Monday evening of each month. The meetings provide a safe place to talk about the intensely painful process of grieving the loss of a child, and to share stories about the lives of our children as well as the death. We provide friendship and support for as long as needed, whether months or years.

We provide a packet of information about the grief process to new attendees, and we maintain a library of grief resources. We keep in touch with members through a monthly newsletter with informative articles on grief, a calendar of events, links to other resources, and a remembrance page. In addition, we send an e-card to members on the anniversary of their child’s passing.

We have a closed Facebook page for members to connect with each other. The national office provides additional online resources.

Annually, we invite the community to join us in the Compassionate Friends World-Wide Candle Lighting on the second Sunday in December. At 7 p.m. in each time zone, families gather at chapter candle lighting ceremonies, creating a virtual wave of light around the globe to honor the lives of the children who have left this earth too soon.

As the pandemic wanes, we look forward to more opportunities to reach out to grieving families. We seek to fulfill the vision of The Compassionate Friends: that everyone who needs us will find us, and that everyone who finds us will be helped.

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