KNACK He moved the plants to the den. It looked like a jungle with the spilled blue and ivory paint on the floor and the large leafy plants and tan couches. At sunset the room turned red and orange. The shadows looking like animals stretching before bed. 5 : Graduation I stood in line. It was fucking cold. My girlfriend, Grace, was standing a few people ahead of me. Every now and then I would inch towards her and poke her in the ribs. She was super ticklish. I looked at all the people watching the graduation. I saw Mr. Clemmens; he always insisted we call him Seth. He hadn’t been in school the last few weeks. The rumour was that he was dying and the admin had freaked out. My father and him were friends from college, I would have heard if anything was up. He was sitting with his husband and my mother. My dad couldn’t get there from Florida. Big surprise. They were wrapped up in blankets and looked like hell. I waved. Seth smiled back and waved. Robert smiled and waved too. I didn’t really know him that well so it surprised me. Seth was like an uncle. I’d known him my whole life. He was at my dad’s second wedding. And I guess he had been the best man in his first. The one to my mother. My dad was his best man when Seth married Robert while it was legal in California. They said my name, James Murphy, and as I walked up the stairs I waved and jumped to show him that I saw him. It felt so strange, like a dream. He laughed and jumped back shaking his arms in the air, the blanket falling quickly. Robert gathered it up just as quick and tried to get Seth to sit back down. I grabbed my diploma and shook all the required hands, stopping for a picture with the superintendent of the school district. I stuck out my tongue and I heard some people laugh. The show went on for another hour or so but I stopped listening after the second speaker. After the ceremony, we all stayed around taking pictures with everyone. Seth disappeared. I didn’t even really think about it. I found out later about the illness, he had told my father not to tell me. I guess he had his reasons. Maybe I could have just given him a card – a hug. I think about it now, him all wrapped up in blankets. Robert covering him up. The bottle of pills that we found in his desk the day Grace and I were looking for staples. I should have known. I should have done something.
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