2013 Melbourne International Comedy Festival Guide

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, BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

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SAMMY J MELBOURNE TOWN HALL MAR 28 - APR 21 9:45PM 8:45 SUN

P O T E N T I A L LY

“One truly spectacular hour of comedy” Chortle, Edinburgh h

THE ARTS CENTRE APR 9- 21 1

Cheap Tix Apr pr 9 9-10 -10

"razor sharp and sublimely funny"

FELICITY WARD

++++ THE scotsman

MONDAY, APRIL 15 ATHENAEUM THEATRE

Mar 28-29, 9.45pm

ONE SHOW ONLY!

Athenaeum Theatre

SMART CASUAL THE OTHER BROTHER

MAR 29 - APR 21 MELBOURNE TOWN HALL

DON’T MISS OUT! BOOK YOU TICKETS NOW! www.COMEDYFESTIVAL.com.au For more info - www.laughingstock.com.au 2

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easter previews comedy this weekend festival melbourne international

27 mar – 21 apr 2013

tix for next to nix

OPENS TOMORROW! THU-SAT COMEDY BONANZA $15 SUN SUNDAY NIGHT LOCK IN $15 TUE 2-FRI 5 APR COMEDY UP LATE

‘Simply the best comedian I have ever seen and the most difficult to describe.’ THE AGE

+++++

TIX @ DOOR DOORS OPEN 11.15PM (SUNDAYS 10.15PM)

FRIDAY 29 MAR THE LATE, LATE ENTERTAINMENT GERALDINE QUINN & SPANDEX

[UK] ‘Mean, mouthy and magnificent’ THE SKINNY

‘The finest female character comic around’ TIME OUT, UK

‘Incomprehensibly funny.’ CHORTLE

Seize the David O’Doherty(IRL) (Carpe DO’Diem)

THE HI-FI 28 MAR – 21 APR TUE-SAT 8.15PM, SUN 7.15PM TIX FROM $26

MELB TOWN HALL 28 MAR – 21 APR TUE-SAT 8.30PM, SUN 7.30PM FROM $25.50

IRISH YOUTUBE SENSATIONS HIT SINGLE HORSE OUTSIDE

FORUM THEATRE 28 MAR – 21 APR TUE-SAT 7.30PM, SUN 6.30PM FROM $28

‘ONE OF THE MOST DAZZLING DISPLAYS OF COMEDY THEATRE I’VE EVER SEEN.’ LONDON TIMES

IRISH HIP HOP STARS!

'INTELLIGENT, PASSIONATE AND ANGRY COMEDY'

RICH EVENING STANDARD

++++

[IRL]

‘SUBVERSIVE GENIUS…’ THE SCOTSMAN

THE HI-FI 28 MAR – 7 APR TUE-SAT 9.45PM, SUN 8.45PM TIX FROM $26

NEW SHOW – WORLD PREMIERE

[US]

PAJAMA MEN

~ JUST THE TWO OF EACH OF US ~ 4 APR ARTS CENTRE MELBOURNE 4–21 APR TUE-SAT 9PM, SUN 8PM* FROM $28 *THU9.30PM

MIKE BIRBIGLIA

HALL

(US)

[US]

CAPITOL THEATRE & MELBOURNE TOWN HALL 28 MAR – 7 APR MON-SAT 9PM, SUN 8PM TIX FROM $28

‘HUGELY AMBITIOUS AND IMPRESSIVE’ THE GUARDIAN

THE RETURN OF EVERYONE’S FAVOURITE TUPPERWARE LADY [US]

AS HEARD ON THIS AMERICAN LIFE

11 SHOWS ONLY!

MY GIRLFRIEND’S BOYFRIEND

A ROTATING BILL OF EXCITING MELBOURNE DEBUTS! FEATURING

Winner 2012 Sundance Audience Award for SLEEPWALK WITH ME [US] 7 SHOWS ONLY!

'Ridiculously enjoyable' New York Times

Iliza Shlesinger, Michael Che, Pete Holmes, Eddie Pepitone, Brendon Walsh, Jessica Kirson & James Adomian MELBOURNE TOWN HALL 28 MAR – 21 APR TUE-SAT 9.45PM, SUN 8.45PM FROM $26.50

THE FESTIVAL’S TOP COMEDIANS IMPROVISE MATERIAL ON NEVER-BEEN-SEEN TOPICS ‘The must-see show of the Festival.’ ***** The Scotsman

ARTS CENTRE MELBOURNE 28 MAR–4 APR TUE-SAT 7.30PM, SUN 6.30PM FROM $28

book now!

VICTORIA HOTEL & MELB TOWN HALL 5–21 APR TUE & THU-SAT 9.45PM, SUN 8.45PM, MON 9PM TIX FROM $20

[UK]

‘A downtown Dame Edna.’ VILLAGE VOICE

FORUM THEATRE 28 MAR – 14 APR TUE-SAT 8.30PM, SUN 7.30PM FROM $25.50

MELB TOWN HALL 28 MAR – 21 APR TUE-SAT 9.45PM, SUN 8.45PM FROM $25.50

comedyfestival.com.au 1300 660 013

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132 849 or comedyfestival.com.au A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS

A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS

‘HE’S CLEAN, AN, N NG, CHARMING, TTY WITTY AND ABOVE OVE ALL FUNNY’ NY’ Sunday Times – London ndon

‘A SERIES OF TEN HILARIOUS, OFTEN TIC SURREALISTIC CLIMAXES... S... COMIC GENIUS’ US’ Edinburgh Evening News

+++++ ++ ARY ‘EXEMPLARY STAND-UP’ UP’ The Glasgow Herald erald

“If you’ve seen Flanagan on The Project, you’ll have an idea of what to expect but she’s even better and faster live.” The Independent Weekly - Adelaide

fringee sell-out show how w 2011

ATHENAEUM THEATRE

ATHENAEUM THEATRE

AKMaL

9TH - 21ST APRIL

26TH MARCH - 7TH APRIL 7PM (6PM SUNDAYS) A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS

“An explosion of laughter and entertainment” The Daily Telegraph

“No one wanted the show to stop... he seemed to own the stage” Sydney Morning Herald

ATHENAEUM THEATRE 5TH, 6TH, 12TH, 13TH APRIL comedyfestival.com.au CARDINIA CULTURAL CENTRE 16TH APRIL PH: 1300 887 624 PLENTY RANGES ARTS CENTRE 17TH APRIL PH: 9217 2317 GEELONG P.A.C 18TH APRIL PH: 5225 1200 WYNDHAM CULTURAL CENTRE 19TH APRIL PH: 8734 6000 DRUM THEATRE DANDENONG 20TH APRIL PH: 9771 6666 WONTHAGGI ARTS CENTRE 23RD APRIL PH: 5672 1083 KINGSTON CITY HALL, MORABBIN 24TH APRIL PH: 9556 4440 FRANKSTON ARTS CENTRE 26TH APRIL PH: 9784 1060 KARRALYKA CENTRE 27TH APRIL PH: 9879 2933 SOUTHERN P.A.C ROSEBUD 28TH APRIL PH: 5986 8204

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1300 660 013 or comedyfestival.com.au A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS

Piece 0f Cake

They are awesome. - The Age www.thekranskysisters.com

www.alist.com.au

THE HIFI

SUNDAYS) 9TH - 21ST APRIL 7PM (6PM

THE FAMOUS SPIEGELTENT AT ARTS CENTRE MELBOURNE MARCH 28 – APRIL 14TH 8.45PM (7.45PM SUNDAYS)

3POD.COM.AU

PRESENTED BY A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT

Bev Killick Goes‘There’ ...Again A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS

A-List Entertainment Presents

As half of the Umbilical Brothers, shane dundas fell down a lot. Now with this solo show, he will need to stand-up.

NOMINEE Green Room Award for Most Innovative Cabaret Show

Can he make you believe?

Join the star and co-writer of Busting Out! as she puts the puppies back in the kennel and steps out for an hilarious night of stand up comedy where nothing is sacred.

“This is a fascinating show.... An absolutely captivating performer.”

POWDER ROOM MELBOURNE TOWN HALL APRIL 1, 8, 15

The Scotsman

AS SEEN ON AUSTRALIA’S A GOT TALENT A-LIST ENTERTAINMENT RTA T INMENT TP PRESENTS RESENTS

shane dundas: believe Gold Room-The Portland Hotel March 28 – April 21st

Join The Scottish, English, Irish, Kiwi, Indian for a huge night of Stand-Up Comedy

“We were all laughing the whole way through” Kyle Sandilands – Australia’s Got Talent BOOKSHOP AT TRADES HALL APRIL 9TH – 21ST

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P R O U D LY

STARS OF

WHITE CHICKS AND SCARY MOVIE 1& 2

OUT OUT OUT SOLD 9TH, SOLD10TH, SOLD11TH THU FRI SAT MAY THE ATHENAEUM THEATRE

4TH AND FINAL SHOW WED 8TH MAY HAMER HALL, ARTS CENTRE MELBOURNE ARTSCENTREMELBOURNE.COM.AU OR CALL 1300 182 183 ‘BEST FEMALE COMEDIAN’ 2010, 2011 & 2012 NZ COMEDY GUILD AWARDS

N NATIO LIVE ENTS PRES

‘BEST NEWCOMER’ 2008 NZ COMEDY GUILD AWARDS

“LAUGH-OUT-LOUD FUNNY” - CHORTLE AUSTRALIA

“STAND OUT PERFORMANCE, SIDE SPLITTING” - RIP IT UP, AUSTRALIA

“DESTINED FOR STUNNING GREATNESS”

- THE

- TVNZ

- TIME

URZILA CARLSON LIVE NATION PRESENTS

IN I’M GOING TO NEED A SECOND OPINION

TOWN HALL, PORTICO ROOM - CNR COLLINS & SWANSTON STREETS, MELBOURNE

BOOKING INFO: WWW.COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU OR 1300 660 013

OUT

- THE

- THE

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SMA SCOT

TIMES

ARD TAND ING S

EVEN

THUR 28TH MARCH — SUN 21ST APRIL

THUR 28 MARCH – SUN 21 APRIL

7.15PM TUES – SAT, 6.15PM SUNDAYS (NO SHOW MONDAYS)

c” i p E “ ” n al e m o n e h P “ t” n e l l e c x E ” “ g n i k c i l l o R

(NO SHOW MONDAYS)

ARTRAGE THEATRE AWARD WINNER 2013 PERTH FRINGE

8.30PM TUES – SAT • 7.30PM SUNDAYS

TRADES HALL, QUILT ROOM BOOKINGS: WWW.COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU OR 1300 660 013

F O R

M O R E

I N F O R M AT I O N

G O

T


PRESENTS

“COMICALLY MASTERFUL” SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE

TWO SHOWS ONLY!

STAR OF 30 ROCK AND SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE T

OU LD ARTS CENTRE MELBOURNE HAMER HALL SATURDAY 13TH APRIL 8PM & 10PM SO

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BOOKINGS WWW.COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU OR 1300 182 183 ics Crit Age ice Cho

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W W W. L I V E N AT I O N . C O M . A U


ADRIAN BOHM BY ARRANGEMENT WITH LISA THOMAS MANAGEMENT PRESENTS

“Has the audience simultaneously weeping with laughter and nodding in agreement.” ++++ – HERALD SUN

HURRY! STARTS NEXT WEEK 2-21 APRIL ARTS CENTRE – PLAYHOUSE BOOK AT ARTS CENTRE BOX OFFICE 1300 182 183 ARTSCENTREMELBOURNE.COM.AU OR TICKETMASTER 136 100 TICKETMASTER.COM.AU 10

DANNYBHOY.COM ABPRESENTS.COM.AU ,

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AVAILABLE NOW AT LEADING DVD RETAILERS


MARGARETCHO.COM | ABPRESENTS.COM.AU

ADRIAN BOHM PRESENTS

“...turns grumpiness into an art form” THE EVENING STANDARD

“...top comedy gig” +++++ THE TELEGRAPH

18-20 APRIL TOWN HALL BOOK AT TICKETMASTER 1300 660 013 COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU

CAPITOL THEATRE 16-21 APRIL BOOK AT TICKETMASTER 1300 660 013 COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU ABPRESENTS.COM.AU

PRESENTED BY ADRIAN BOHM MARGARETCHO.COM | ABPRESENTS.COM.AU

ADRIAN BOHM PRESENTS

“Slick, intelligent, blissfully funny... this is insightful, warm, classy comedy” +++++ TIME OUT

T HE R ACIS T FROM THURSDAY UNTIL 21 APRIL TRADES HALL BOOK AT TICKETMASTER 1300 660 013 COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU TREVORNOAH.COM ABPRESENTS.COM.AU , BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

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CONTENTS Page 14 Moosehead Award Recipients: Joel Tito, Kate McLennan & Wes Snelling, Lessons with Luis Page 18 Ross Noble, Arj Barker, Loretta Maine, Jenny Elcair, Danny Bhoy, Paul Foot Page 19 Josh Thomas, Matt Okine Page 20 Sam McCool, Jimeoin, Luke Heggie, Tracy Morgan, Hannah Gadsby, Urzila Carlson Page 22 Sammy J, Smart Casual, Pajama Men, Nick Cody, DeAnne Smith, Asher Treleaven Page 23 Dave Hughes, Tripod Page 24 Eddie Peppitone, Shane Dundas, Ruby Wax, Sarah Millican, The Kransky Sisters, Bev Killick Page 25 Claire Hooper, Kitty Flanagan Page 26 Heath Franklin’s Chopper, Aamer Rahman, Josie Long, Adam Hills, Margaret Cho, Jack Dee Page 27 Adam Rozenbachs, Tom Gleeson Page 28 David Quirk, Simon Keck Page 30 Late Night Theatresports, Best of the Edinburgh Fest Page 32 Rhys Nicholson, Craig Hill Page 33 Trevor Noah, Felicity Ward Page 34 Eddie Ifft, Michael Workman Page 36 Idiots of Ants, Mike Birbiglia Page 38 Barry Morgan, Tim Ferguson Page 39 Stephen K Amos, Randy Page 40 Bane 1, Fanfiction Page 42 Russell McGillton, David O’Doherty Page 44 Rich Fulcher, Tommy Little Page 46 Kevin Kropinyeri, Charlie Pickering & Waleed Aly, Nina Conti, Wil Anderson, Sam Simmons, Peter Helliar Page 48 Cam Knight, Damien Power, Mel Buttle, Dave Thornton, Judith Lucy & Denise Scott, Max and Ivan, Cal Wilson, Tom Ballard, Dixie Longate, Rubberbandits , Simon Munnery, Akmal Page 49 The Comedy Zone, Deadly Funny, The Festival Club, RAW Comedy Grand Final, Upfront, Headliners Page 50 John Robertson, Dayne Rathbone Genevieve Fricker, Nikki Britton, Michael Hing, John Conway, Ryan Coffey, Steen Raskopolous, Ronny Chieng, Anthony Salame, Steve Hughes, Josh Earl Page 52 Wonderland Carnivale, Alex Williamson, Rich Hall, Jacques Barrett, Joel Creasey, Jeff Green, Greg Fleet, School Dance, Jon Bennett, Jared Jekyll, Nath Valvo, A Modern Deception Page 53 Jack Druce, Em Rusciano, Dom Romeo & Guests, The Rapture, Aisha The Geisha And The Dairy Chicks, Nick Kesidis, Alasdair Tremblay-Birchall, Matty Grey, Fabian Lapham & The Actual Musicians, Lisa-Skye, Anil Desai, Choir Girl, Mark Trenwith , Rama Nicholas, Xavier Toby, Simon Palomares Page 54 Max Attwood, Nicole Henriksen, And What’s Your Freaking Problem???, Squeaky Clean Comedy, Josh Earl, John Robertson, The Fairytale Cookbook, Madeleine Tucker, Nicholas J. Johnson, The Moulin Beige, Suns Of Fred, David J, Celebrity Theatresports, Set-List, 9th Annual Deakin Comedy Revue Page 55 Bron Batter & Her Parents, Tommy Bradson, Poet Laureate Telia Nevile, The Listies, Zoe Coombs Marr, Candy B & Busty Beatz, Sabrina D’angelo, Slutmonster and Friends, Yon, Simon Abrahams & Lachlan Macleod, Karin Danger, The Big HOO-HAA!, Jason Chatfield, Lincoln Daw, All Of The Things!, The Incredibly Satisfying Adventures of Milton McAffrey P.I.

THE 2013 MELBOURNE INTERNATIONAL COMEDY FESTIVAL BY DAVE THORNTON

It’s Melbourne International Comedy Festival time again, hey? Don’t worry – it’s not like other festivals. You don’t need wristbands or drink tokens and you won’t be sitting in a show when a steroidfuelled freak with his top off screams ‘I love this joke’ and starts fist pumping the air. This is a month long comedian’s festival. This is our Olympics – what with our extensive use of Stilnox and lack of gold medals – and at the precipice of every Olympiad The Olympic Oath is read out. An athlete is selected to represent all involved. So in honour of my new comparison I’ve made The Comedic Games Oath. I just need someone to read it out. ...anyone? Okay! Fine! I’ll do it. I’ll just clear my throat.

of comedian-ship, for the glory of mirth and the honor of finding laughter to boost our own egos.

*cough* Me-me-me-mi-mooooo. Unique New York. Unique New York.

Wait! You’re not getting off that easily. I’ve also concocted one for audience members. Now repeat after me. I know you’re in a public place but say it out loud!! Commit! Do it! *shakes fist*

Okay I’m good to go. In the name of all the comedians I promise that we shall take part in these Melbourne International Comedy Festival Games. Respecting and abiding by the dates we’re contractually obliged to perform, committing ourselves to a festival without doping and without drugs (if athletes can lie in oath about it then so can we), in the true spirit

In the name of all the audience members, I promise that we shall witness these Melbourne International Comedy Festival Games with complete impartiality, laughing when it’s funny, silent when it’s not and only heckling if I’m being a complete fuckwit. Without further ado — let the funny games begin!

A W O R D F R O M O U R F R I E N D S AT

GRAVITY ESPRESSO

So, there’s 100s ridiculously good shows in this year’s festival. However, there’s also 100s ridiculously overdue bills in your letter box. You can’t afford all of this, can you? Never fear! We’ve got you covered. We’re giving away tickets to so many shows this year it’s, well, ridiculous. Just keep your eyes peeled for the ‘Win tickets to this show at beat.com. au’ starbursts within the guide and then head to our website to win tickets to see these upstanding stand-ups: Arj Barker, Eddie Ifft, Stephen K Amos, Felicity Ward, Cal Wilson, Tom Ballard, Hannah Gadsby, Sam Simmons, Claire Hooper, Josh Thomas, Tommy Little, Dave Thornton, Michael Workman, Tom Gleeson, Wil Anderson, Pete Helliar, Matt Okine, Rhys Nicholson, Mel Buttle, Craig Hill, Damien Power, Dayne Rathbone, Genevieve Fricker, Nikki Britton, Michael Hing, Steen Raskopolous, Idiots of Ants, Max and Ivan are, Loretta Maine, Rubberbandits, Josie Long, FanFiction Comedy, Barry Morgan, Bev Killick, Sam McCool, Tim Ferguson, Randy, Smart Casual, Heath Franklin, David Quirk, Shane Dundas, The Kransky Sisters, Tripod, Kitty Flanagan, Jimeoin, Urzila Carlson, Bane 1, Late Night Theatresports, The Fairytale Cookbook, Celebrity Theatresports, Trevor Noah, Jack Dee, Margaret Cho, Jeff Green, Greg Fleet, Joel Creasey, Luke Heggie, Alex Williamson, Nick Cody, Jacques Barrett, Cam Knight, John Robertson (The Dark Room & Kinkling, Kevin Kropinyeri, Simon Keck, Asher Treleaven, DeAnne Smith, The Comedy Zone, Josh Earl ( Is A Librarian & vs The Australian Women’s Weekly Children’s Birthday Cake Book, Deadly Funny National Showcase, RAW Comedy National Grand Final, Upfront, Simon Abrahams and Lachlan McLeod, Yon, Karin Danger, The Big HOO HAA!, Alasdair Tremblay-Birchall, Jon Bennett, The Rapture, Lisa-Skye, The Incredibly Satisfying Adventures es of Milton McAffrey P.I., Fabian Lapham & The Actual Musicians, TICKET Aisha The Geisha And The Dairy ST Chicks, Lincoln Daw, The Moulin SHOW O THESE Beige, Mark Trenwith, School BEAT.C S AT OM.AU Dance, Jared Jekyll, Choir Girl, Max Attwood, Nicole Henriksen and David J!

WIN

Clickety-clack to beat.com.au for your chance to win!

CREDITS

Here in Melbourne, we are more than a bit partial to our coffee. It’s ingrained in our culture, much like our annual Melbourne International Comedy Festival, Jeff Kennett, and our efficient, cost effective public transport system. It’s in this city that American coffee chains are forced to lift their game to compete with the plethora of superb independent cafés, serving our finicky coffee lovers the best cuppas around. At Gravity, we take pride in supplying Melbourne with the beans to make this all possible. We offer an extensive collection of blends which are available at a wide range of stores around Melbourne, as well as for purchase online for the home barista. Zenith is a medium roast with excellent complexity and a smooth aftertaste, while Organic entices with a full-bodied, smooth and creamy blend, highlighting bright chocolate and toffee characteristics with delicate fruit flavours. Also available are 6º Darker – a dark and sweet with a luscious, creamy mouth feel – and XTC, a well-rounded blend with a sweet chocolate finish, medium body and complex palate. There is also a Decaff for espresso – decaffeinated, using the Swiss Water Process. We are very excited to announce that we are the first Australian member of the Ethical Tea Partnership and will soon be releasing our Project Tea range, which is an imported direct from source tea. According to a fact I’m about to make up, coffee helps you laugh more. Sir Isaac Newton discovered the laws of gravity, which is okay, but nothing special, unlike discovering Gravity Espresso. So buy Gravity Espresso or you won’t laugh at anything and people won’t like you. More: gravityespresso.com.au

BEAT MAGAZINE’S COVERAGE OF THE 2013 MELBOURNE INTERNATIONAL COMEDY FESTIVAL CONTINUES Got a show in the comedy festival this year? Let everyone know through Beat – the proud publisher of The Comic Strip and Comic In The Corner. Heavily discounted advertising packages including free editorials, images, giveaways and more apply all throughout the festival dates (Wednesday March 27 – Sunday April 21). For more information please email ronnit@beat.com.au or call (03) 8414 9700

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GIVEAWAYS

, BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

Editor: Tyson Wray Senior Advertising/Editorial Co-ordinator: Ronnit Sternfein Sub-editor: Nick Taras Advertising: Adam Morgan, Jess Riley, Taryn Stenvei, Contributors: Avrille Bylok-Collard, Alexandra Duguid, Alasdair Duncan, Josh Fergeus, Jack Franklin, Andrew ‘Hazard’ Hickey, Peter Hodgson, Katherine Houston, Dijana Kumurdian, Nick Mason, Nick Taras, Simone Ubaldi Krissi Weiss, Tess Woodward Production Manager: Patrick O’Neill Graphic Designers: Michael Cusack, Patrick O’Neill, Gill Tucker Special Thanks: Linda Curtis, Katherine Houston Published by Furst Media 3 Newton Street, Richmond VIC 3121 Ph) (03) 9428 3600 e) info@beat.com.au © 2013 Furst Media Pty Ltd. No part may be reproduced without the consent of the copyright holder.


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MOOSEHEAD AWARD RECIPIENTS JOEL TITO THE TRIAL AND DEATH OF SOCRATES ( NO RELATION ) You would struggle to find a show at this year’s MICF that appeals to such a dynamic range of emotions as The Trial and Death of Socrates (No Relation). “It’s a stupid story,” laughs Joel Tito, a formally accredited clown. “I play Socrates, who’s this silent protagonist who lives by himself and has never left his room and will never leave his room, and we get this insight into his life. “There’s no recorded stuff, everything’s live. There are characters that populate [Socrates’] life, but fundamentally this is a show about loneliness and sadness and seeing this guy who just has no contact and has no love. It’s a bit sad, I guess. I’m conscious of not just churning out a show about dicks,” he laughs. “At the same time, I’m not deft enough to deal with weighty issues…it’s good to have an idea of your voice underlying the works you put together. That was sort of the genesis of this; I didn’t want to just churn out a piece that was run of the mill. I wanted to think about it for a while and work out how I craft the story.” Tito had been “training informally as a stupid idiot for 27 years”, according to the press release. However, after the 2010 MICF, he was convinced by his friend Phil Burgers (aka Dr Brown – 2012 MICF Barry Award winner) to gain formal accreditation from Philippe Gaulier –

referred to as a ‘Parisian psychopath’. “Philippe Gaulier, well, I’m not sure if he’s certifiably insane, but he’s certainly anecdotally insane. He trained Sacha Baron Cohen and Emma Wilson. He trained with Jacques Lecoq who is sort of like the godfather of clowning. He…started his own clown school and I did a clown course with him. He’s just widely known as an arsehole,” he laughs. “He plays effectively the white-face clown which is traditionally the one concerned with status, the very stern one. And if you look at good comedy duos throughout the ages there’s always a white face in the stern/status driven one and then there’s the Auguste, the idiot playful one…[the whiteface] is the role he plays, so he’s awful to his students. Nearly everyone in the class cried. The idea is that we can see your ideas, we can see when you’re ham-fistedly trying to construct jokes, and audiences don’t enjoy that. Audiences enjoy something real in front of them. His theory was: if you’re gonna come out and have shitty little ideas, then I’m going to reduce you to a human emotion, and that human emotion will be shame and embarrassment. He would say, ‘We enjoy seeing this far more than shitty ideas. We enjoy seeing the person reacting and getting hurt’. It’s a difficult lesson to learn but it’s very valuable. He’s a phenomenal teacher.” When people hear the word ‘clown’ they normally associate that

KATE MCLENNAN & WES SNELLING STANDARD DOUBLE

In terms of venue, Standard Double is by far the most unique show at this year’s MICF. While many shows will be performed in hotel venues around the city, Standard Double will be performed inside a hotel room. “The show I guess is inspired by The Victoria Hotel, which I was performing in last year,” explains Kate McLennan, who plays in Standard Double alongside Wes Snelling. “Lots of people would come up to me after the show and tell me stories about people who stay there and I just got to thinking about how great it would be to do a show in a hotel room showing different people that have stayed in that room. “The Victoria Hotel – whilst being very supportive of the comedy festival – didn’t really the idea of a bunch of comedians doing a show in a room and dragging 20 people up to one of the rooms,” she continues. “We found a hotel that is up for that so instead we’re doing a show in a hotel on St Kilda Rd called The Blackman and they’re right on board with it.” “They’ve given us this great suite, that’s a long room, a functional room that they usually rent out,” adds Snelling. “At the moment there’s two

queen size beds in it, and we’re taking out one of the beds and seating 24 audience members in. We’re working in and around different characters (over 16 characters each) that come in and out of the hotel room and one at point we have a spa. It’s gonna be really quite cool and different.” There was a charming rapport between McLennan and Snelling throughout the whole interview, and this flowing energy has expanded their comfort levels in exploring more risqué ideas. “Wes has done a lot of cabaret, and the last couple of years I’ve been mainly working in stand-up, so it’s nice to do characters where you don’t have to take as much responsibility of what’s coming out of your mouth because – it’s a character! So I can get all out of those inappropriate stories that I’ve had about my friends and my family that I haven’t been able to say on stage in stand-up, I can put that out a character’s mouth instead.” “But now they’re gonna know Kate!” laughs Snelling. “I’m gonna have to take responsibility for this nude scene we’re in discussion about.”

LESSONS WITH LUIS FAMOUCITY!

Warning: if you haven’t heard of cult YouTube comedy trio Lessons With Luis before you will probably think that the following quotes from Luis are the ramblings of a strange, chirpy madman. Comprised of oldest son Luis, his younger brother Luelin along with their father Len, Lessons With Luis won the RAW Comedy competition last year. To put that achievement in context, previous contestants in RAW Comedy include Chris Lilley, Tom Ballard, Tim Minchin, Ronny Chieng and Josh Thomas. Their absurd, whimsical humour is somewhat of a wink to anti-comedy – a type of humour that elicits laughter by intentionally not being funny. “I have my new show Famoucity!” opens Luis. “Famoucity is a bit of a hard word to say because it’s a made up word, it’s a double word, sticking the words ‘famous’ and ‘city’ together to make ‘famoucity’. It’s a made up place where dreams are made and famous people live and that’s where the story of my new play takes place. My dad, me, Luelin and a special guest – it’s a show full of singing and dancing and surprises and cats,” he pauses, “and fun,” he pauses once more, “and love.” Luis’ voice is defined by a soft-spoken, puerile tone, and it remains so even when talking about the suggestion that Lessons With Luis is anti-comedy. “I think anti-comedy is a bad word. It sounds like a bad word. But

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I think our comedy – as long as people are smiling and happy – it’s comedy. People just laugh at it, so I think it’s just comedy, not bad anti-comedy because that means nobody laughs and nobody smiles which means nobody has fun. Maybe it’s pro-comedy, or plus-comedy, we just like to make people happy and we give it our best shot. That’s what my dad tells me.” In previous Lessons With Luis shows, Luis’ dad Len has dazzled the audience with his stunning musical abilities. “He plays the harmonica. He’s very good with the instruments we have. We have a xylophone, a little bongo, rhythm sticks – he’s mastered the rhythm sticks – and we also have flute. My dad’s very good at the flute! But it depends what day because he has asthma as well, so sometimes it comes out not as good as other days. Tuesdays are good days to play the flute.” While Luis speaks fondly of his father, if he had to choose between his dad and his brother, whom does he love more? “My dad, but I like both, please don’t put that on the interview. I like all family members the same but sometimes Luelin doesn’t listen to me, maybe put that instead. Sometimes Luellin doesn’t do what I tell him to do and that gets me a little upset. But it’s mainly his fault so it’s up to him to do what I tell him to do and then we can not fight sometimes on stage and not fight sometimes in the

with figures such as Krusty from The Simpsons or the psychopathic killer from Stephen King’s IT, but as Tito elucidates, clowning is much deeper than that. “People have a perception of clowns: they put a red nose on and they juggle – that’s the two things they know. My conception is very much informed by Philippe and even by friends…I sort of gristled at the idea of being labelled a clown, and it wasn’t until I read and thought about it that I understood that this sort of clowning philosophy is really applicable to comedy. If you boil clowning down to it, it’s just about recognising that the work you’re presenting is living. You’re in a room with 30, 50, 100 and they’re not there to see this well-executed, checked-out joke. They wanna know that the person in front of them is alive. “When a joke doesn’t go well it hurts. And when something goes really well I’m giddy like a child. That realness is what’s crucial to a clown; there’s no fakeness. If something flops, you don’t just quickly push through, you sit there and absorb the flop. Clowning is more a philosophy at looking at comedy rather than a subcategory; it’s a way of conceptualising or analysing comedy rather than one who has a red nose and baggy pants.” One of the more unusual aspect of The Trial and Death of Socrates (No Relation) is the inclusion of a Japanese enka singer. “The show’s supported by Kitajima Saburo, a Japanese enka singer, whose unfortunately been mistakenly booked to support the show. He doesn’t speak any English and we watch him muddle his way through setting up the premise of the show. enka is a pretty funny art form. It’s typically sung by geriatric Japanese men, occasionally women…the art form is essentially operatic…the music’s awful. It’s unlistenable for the large part. “Most people sub-80 won’t enjoy the art form but there’s a reverence, a rite of passage, that when you sit down and enjoy an enka song, you go away and go, ‘I’ll have another please’ – then you know you’ve come of age. I actually won Asian Pop Idol in 2009 with an enka song, and the character comes from that.” On the back of good reviews from Tito’s raw version of this show at

“We thought we needed to get some nudity in there,” says McLennan. “We’re yet to workshop the big sex scene but maybe we’ll just improvise on the night. You can’t do a show in a hotel room without doing a ridiculous sex scene.” “It’s gonna be more ridiculous as we play it out on the night,” says Snelling. “The chemistry, we just let it build.” The setting of a hotel room provides such a profuse amount of ideas that even in the foetal stages of rehearsal, the running time had extended past two hours. “Most of it is drawn on our experiences,” says Snelling. “We’ve actually met with some people who are concierges at hotels to give us the dirt and tell us the behind the scenes tricks of the trade that may make you not want to stay in a hotel room ever again.” “One of them is to never use the glasses that are sitting in the room because they don’t take them away and put them in a dishwasher, they just rub the lip print off with their hands and run it under the tap,” informs McLennan. “Also there’s another hotel that had a policy that if an Asian man or lady was staying in the room the night before, they wouldn’t wash the sheets because they thought that,” she giggles. “They wouldn’t shed as much hair.” “I still struggle to believe that one to be quite honest,” says Wes. While McLennan and Snelling both wrote and star in the show, one of the biggest names in British comedy became involved as director. “When we found out we were Moosehead recipients obviously they support us with putting us in touch with the director, and we had a number of people in mind, and Mark Watson was suggested to us and we found out that he had done a show called Hotel in Edinburgh last year… we obviously love Mark’s sense of humour and we’d be on the same page there, and thought he’d also be great at working out the logistics of how we get to one scene to the next in the hotel room,” explains Snelling. “We’ve had two days of rehearsal with him now and it’s becoming clearer and clearer that he was the right person. He adds a sense of stupidity

house because fighting is not a good thing, I know that, but also misbehaving and not listening to your older brother is not a good thing either.” There’s probably only one thing that Luis loves more than his family, and if you’ve ever walked out of a comedy show and thought, ‘not enough talking about cats’ then this is the show for you. “My favourite thing about [my cat] Catty is that he’s a cat and cats are the best animals in the world I think because they can stay indoors and outdoors, they can be there for you to hug and love and comb and take care of them because taking care of things is very important in today’s society.” I’m curious: what is Luis’ favourite joke of all time? “What did the cat say to the cow? Me-oooooo. That’s a good one. What did the astronaut cat say to the astronaut cow? Me-ooooo. In space. What did the gardener cat say to the gardener cow? Meoooo. And then he continued gardening.” While the upcoming national election will likely come down to Julia Gillard and Tony Abbott, don’t rule out a late push for Luis, judging by his appealing election promises. “If I was Prime Minister of Australia I would give myself a TV show where I can teach everybody about things in the world. The show would be about me, mostly, but we can have my dad and my little brother in there as well. We’ll have hour-long ads about cats, so we can go from cats to my TV show which is about learning, and then to cats again and I think that should be a channel. “I’d also make sure people have medicine, like medicine that they need for their kidneys, and that would be cheap. I’d also make sure that people can live in their own bedrooms and not have to share them with their brothers so you don’t have to change in the toilet. I’ll also make sure that there are no wars because wars are bad and we hear too much about the bad news, so that’s where my TV show comes in so we can make people happy all the time.” Lessons With Luis are an ideal choice for Mooseheads and while Luis praises the help a Mooseheads award provides, there is one change he’d like to make. “I would like them to be called Catheads, I’ve still got to make up the long email for them to change the name, but let’s stick with

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Melbourne Fringe, Mooseheads could see the brilliance in its genesis. “It’s a great benefit to have assistance through Mooseheads. They’ve given me a director, rehearsal spaces, it’s just been good to have someone work on it with you who can see these little seeds of a show and be able to massage them into nice looking bonfire.” This bonfire, it seems, has developed into one of the most complex, moving shows at MICF this year. “It’s a show by an idiot that’s as crazy as it is thoughtful.” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: Trades Hall – The Bookshop, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.45pm (Sundays 7.45pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. and Laugh Pack $16, Group, Tightarse Tuesdays and Preview $15

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and silliness that combines with Kate and I because we have a kind of darkness about our comedy in a lot of ways. That combination is coming together quite nicely. There’s a little bit of Fawlty Towers in there which makes it cool.” The duo plan to tour Standard Double around the country after MICF but they will need to slightly adjust the show depending on certain factors. “At the moment our hotel’s a five star establishment so that informs what we write as well, whereas [it would differ] if it was some kind of two-and-a-half style motel,” says McLennan, before Snelling interjects. “You know, like if it was some kind of place where they don’t wash the sheets because an Asian had slept over.” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: The Blackman Hotel, 452 St Kilda Rd, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 21 (except Mondays) Time: 7.30pm Tickets: Full $27, Conc. $25, Preview $20

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Mooseheads for now. It’s been really good, we’ve had lots of support from them, for us to make this very complicated show. “I think people should come to Famoucity! to hopefully laugh and feel happy and smile. It’s a family friendly show so you can bring younger people and hopefully they will learn new things. It’s an educational stage play so after the show you will learn to look at the things differently, hopefully, for the better, because I do a lot of research on the topics that we go through on the play and hopefully you will come out being learnder [sic].” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Portico Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (Thursday - Sunday) Times: 6pm (Sundays 5pm) Tickets: Full $22, Conc., Group and Laugh Pack $18, Preview $15


RAW COM E D WI N N E Y R 2012

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“Wickedly subversive… Funny, charming & charismatic”METRO

“funny as hell” SCOTLAND ON SUNDAY

JOCK’S TRAP!

16 - 21 April 8:45pm (Sun 7:45pm) The Famous Spiegeltent at Arts Centre Melbourne

“TALENT TO WATCH”

SCENE MAGAZINE 28 MARCH - 21 APRIL PORTLAND HOTEL 8:30PM (7:30PM SUN)

Bookings comedyfestival.com.au or 1300 660 013


The Age

Herald Sun

Chortle

ronny chieng

CAN YOU DO THIS? NO YOU CAN’T

Winner Best Newcomer MICF2012 28 March - 21 April 7pm (Sun 6pm) Melb Town Hall

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ROSS NOBLE

ARJ BARKER

Moments before I spoke to Ross Noble, news broke that the cardinals of the Catholic Church had begun the process of selecting a new pope. “I applied last time and they weren’t interested. I was furious about that…I was quite surprised when he resigned, because I thought popes regenerated like Dr Who. I thought they just fell to floor and the next one stood up.” Noble is distinguished from his contemporaries by his dazzling improvisational talents. By drawing heavily on audience participation, no two shows are ever identical. It’s the product of a wonderfully chaotic mind channelled through a garrulous style. “I kept trying to work out ways of describing the new show [Mindblender] and people would say, ‘What’s the show about?’ and it’s basically like if you took everything that was in my mind, then blended it up and poured it out for others to consume, that’s what it is.” In the time since last year’s visit, Noble starred in Irish horror-comedy film Stitches, released in Australia just in time for his arrival. “I play a scummy children’s entertainer. He hates kids, he turns up to a party drunk, and they end up accidentally killing him, he gets a knife through his face. Ten years later, a group of black magic clowns bring him back to life and he takes revenge on the kids that killed him at the party, who are now teenagers. It’s very much in the tradition of ‘80s-teen slasher films except unlike those regular slashes that just go around killing people, he kills them using the props from his clowning. Someone gets an umbrella through the head, someone gets their head kicked off with big shoes, a guy gets internal organs turned into a balloon animal dog. That sort of thing. It’s a family film,” he laughs. “The funniest thing for me, was because I was covered in blood most of the time, I went into this chemist to try get this stuff to get rid of the special effects blood. It just stains your hands y’know? So I went into the shop, and without thinking went, ‘You got anything to get this blood off my hands?’ and the woman went, ‘What?’ and I went, ‘Oh no, it’s alright, it’s not my blood!’” he laughs. “Instead of saying, ‘It’s fake blood’ I went, ‘It’s not my blood’ and she went, ‘Okay…’” While Australians were only recently granted the release of Stitches on DVD, contrasted to its release in the UK last year, Noble himself is almost an adopted son of Australia (he in fact used to

Generally speaking, comedians come from the ranks of nerds and losers, developing their sense of humour as a protective shell against the horrors of high school. Arj Barker, however was a snowboarder growing up, making him that rarest of things – a jock turned comedian. I wonder if the other comedians feel threatened by this when he shows up at festivals, worried that he might be about to steal their lunch money or subject them to humiliating swirlies. He’s quick, however, to assure me that this is not the case. “I get along great with other comedians!” he says. “I mean, yeah, I was athletic growing up, but I was also a bit of nerd. I wasn’t one of the super popular kids or anything so I can definitely relate. I’m right there with them!” While he may identify with the nerds in the comedy ranks, there is one significant thing that sets Arj Barker apart. Many in the stand-up set use their comedy as a form of therapy, laying their pain bare, along with their many faults and failings. Barker, however, has never been particularly prone to this – his comedy comes from a far more laid-back, observational place, and it strikes me that he must be one of the more well-adjusted comedians currently working. “I don’t know if I’m super well-adjusted,” he says, “but I like to try to have a positive message in my comedy, rather than just be depressive or negative. I guess that maybe I just write jokes, I don’t go for selfexamination, and I’m not too worried about going deep. It’s about the jokes first and foremost.” Barker’s humour may be laid-back, but his performance is quite energetic and expansive. He throws himself full-body into the jokes, and performing for an hour takes a lot of energy and focus. “I’m careful to hold on to my voice through the day, and to not go out too late or too often,” he says. “As weird as this might sound coming from a comedian, I take the shows pretty seriously. I really want to do a good show. I don’t want to just show up – I want to make sure I’m top notch. It does take a bit.” These days, Barker has even taken to working with a vocal coach to make sure he remains in the best possible condition. “It’s a bit unusual,” he says, “but I like learning new things, so I’ve really been enjoying it.” The Melbourne International Comedy Festival sees Barker performing his new show, Go Time. The theme of the evening is pretty loose – there’s no concept, he says, no hook to bring

GO TIME

MINDBLENDER

live in regional Victoria with his family until the tragic bush fires in 2009 destroyed his home). Australia’s obsession with Noble is symbolised at many of his shows through the practice of leaving gifts on the stage during the interval. “They’re not really gifts, they’re more gestures, but on the last tour – it’s now my profile pic on Twitter – a woman got a life size tattoo of my face on her leg. That was pretty freaky. I thought, ‘That can’t get any weirder’ and then another woman got my face as Stitches the clown on her back, which is the highest compliment anyone can pay, but at the same time, a little worrying.” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: Hisense Area Date: April 18 Time: 8pm Tickets: Category A $69.90, Category B $59.90, Category C $54.90

LORETTA MAINE

JENNY ECLAIR

Pippa Evans’ sexy and psychotic comedy creation, Loretta Maine, makes her Australian debut in Melbourne with songs to sing, tales to tell and bitter pain to unleash. The love child of Tim Minchin and Alice Cooper, neurotic American singersongwriter Loretta first made an appearance at the 2008 Edinburgh Fringe. The show was a smash hit and nominated for the if.comedy Best Newcomer Award. Now Loretta and her band are bringing their tight set of songs from her new album Bipolar to MICF where her hilarious jilted rage will resound with anyone who’s agonised over love, loss and the urge to wreak violent revenge.

The professional grumpy old woman is back. Jenny Eclair made her Australian debut over a decade ago, blowing audiences away with her inimitable brand of outrageously caustic comedy. In the past year, she published her third novel, Life, Death and Vanilla Slices, and appeared in her first panto – as the Fairy Godmother in Cinderella. She was also the first woman to win the coveted Perrier Award at Edinburgh Fringe Festival and hasn’t stopped banging on about it ever since. Even though stand up gives her dreadful varicose veins, it gets her out of the house and most importantly gives her partner a break.

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everything together. It will just be a guy on stage telling jokes for an hour. “All I can really say about the show is that it flows really well,” he says. “It’s got some big laughs and some good messages, and I’m really happy with it. I guess you could say it touches on various subjects, and there are some running gags. The biggest thing, for me, is that there’s a musical element this time – there’s not a whole lot of music, but I’m not much of a singer or dancer, so that part is particularly challenging and fun.” In fact, if Barker ever gets out of the stand-up game, then ‘Badass MC’ is the next thing on his list of possible career choices. “I’ve made a couple of rap songs already, so I think I’d like to try making more,” he says. “I like Eminem, his raps are humorous but also very deep. I’m going to work with some good musicians one of these days and make some tracks like that.” BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Main Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays and Wednesday April 17) Times: Tuesday - Saturday 7.30pm, Sunday March 31 7.30pm, Sunday April 7 & 14, Sunday April 21 5pm Tickets: Full $42.50, Conc., Group and Laugh Pack $39.50, Tightarse Tuesday $35, Preview $33

ECLAIRIOUS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall, Powder Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sunday 7.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $31.50, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $29.50, Conc., Laugh Pack, Group (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $25.50

DANNY BHOY

PAUL FOOT

It is a truth universally acknowledged that life is full of indignities. Nothing is built to last, big corporations are out to screw the little guy … insert your gripe of choice here. We’ve all written our share of indignant status updates and angry letters, but comedian Danny Bhoy has taken it a step further – his new show, Dear Epson, is all about venting his frustration at the modern world. “I suppose I had a bit of a mini breakdown,” he tells me, of the origin of the show. “I used to make my tour manager laugh every day with my complaints, my views on the world. He finally got fed up with it and told me that I should start writing my complaints down instead.” At this point, a light went off in his head, and he decided to give the letter-writing method a try. Bhoy’s first letter was to Epson, to ask about the price of their ink, and where they could possibly get their huge price from. “For each printer, they bring out a new cartridge,” he fumes, “so if you buy a new printer, you can’t keep the cartridge from the old one, you have to buy a new one. I make the point, in the letters, that ink is more expensive than champagne, and nobody seems to be questioning this. I don’t understand why printer ink is so expensive but if you buy a pen with ink, it’s ridiculously cheap. Companies keep the price high, and the further you dig, the more widespread you start to realise it is …” All of this griping might make Bhoy sound like he’s approaching cranky old man territory, but you can rest assured that the show is performed with a light heart. “It’s amazing the number of people who’ve had similar experiences,” he says, “and a lot of that comes out at the show.” In terms of the audience’s response, Bhoy tells me, Dear Epson is the most enjoyable show he has ever done. “There’s a level of interaction there that I just haven’t had in the past,” he says. “People are laughing and agreeing and saying, ‘Yeah, this is great, this guy’s right on the money.” The show, though, runs a lot deeper than just consumer complaints. “When I wrote that initial letter to Epson, I thought it would make for a fun bit of stand-up, but after I’d done it, I realised that letter-writing was also a form of therapy. I was intrigued at the places you could take that, and I thought the show would be quite dull if it was just me sniping at big companies for an hour and a half, after a while, I start writing to

Paul Foot performed the best show I saw at last year’s comedy festival; painfully original, inventive, intense, awkward, ranty and exceedingly hilarious. He is unwieldy in looks and manner, it would be fair to say his hair modelled on his personality, or perhaps it’s the other way around – short on the top and scraggly round the edges. In a fat ‘70s tie fastened too short he staggers on stage, or perhaps hovers off stage, dragging the audience down some of the most startling funny confused cul de sacs of his mind. “I am interested in comedy that you don’t know why it’s funny and no one really knows why they are laughing,” Foot says of his approach to humour. “My job is to go on and to say things in a room in front of people and they must all laugh about it, and if they don’t laugh it is massively embarrassing for everyone and a complete disaster. So you don’t want to think about it too much really, if you analysed it you’d drive yourself round the bend.” On stage Foot walks around like a man drunk on his own thoughts, lost in idea spasms, his hunched frame racked with convulsions like a stutter in the brain, a battle of both body and mind. On the phone his conversation is remarkably similar – it’s hard to tell the difference between joking and chatting. Certainly, when I ask what started him out in comedy his answer might be a bit of both. “The random winds of fate,” he replies. “I just decided to do comedy, basically I thought I would give it a go and I just liked it, so I thought it would be my career. I thought it would be more interesting to be in show business than be in non-show business.” In fact he professes to no real interest in other comedy at all. “I never really watched comedy, indeed when I made my first performance I didn’t even understand how stand-up comedy worked,” he happily concedes. “I didn’t actually understand that first time that comedians write jokes and go on with their jokes, I just thought all comedians make it all up, so when I did my first performance I just made it all up. “So I never really watched before I started and I never really watch it now. I mean obviously I’ve seen some because years working clubs you see the other comedians performing, but I have always attempted to perform in an artistic vacuum – just do my own thing and don’t take much notice of others. I never watch comedy, I don’t get in and watch comedy on telly, I’d much rather watch a murder mystery to unwind. I don’t want to watch comedy when I get home

DEAR EPSON

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Venue: Melbourne Town Hall, Supper Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 7 (except Monday) Times: 8.15pm (Sundays 7.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $36, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $31.50, Group, Laugh Pack $30 (N/A Saturdays), Conc. (N/A Saturdays) and Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $25

KENNY LARCH IS DEAD

people I know, to old school teachers and the like. At this point, the show becomes more about my life – the final letter is addressed to me. I start out as an angry consumer, and end up trying to work out why I feel this way!” Australian audiences respond especially well to Bhoy – a fact he attributes to the similarities between our sense of humour and that of the Scottish. “You can go into a pub in Australia and it’s similar to going to a pub in Scotland,” he says. “It’s just people standing around a bar telling stories. I find that to be exactly the way I do my comedy. I try to make an audience, no matter how big it is, feel like we’re sitting around a pub having a natter. That’s probably the reason I feel so at home in Australia – outside of Scotland, it’s probably the place that I feel most at home.” I ask if any of his complaints in the show will specifically address Australia, and he tells me that we can definitely look out for this. “There’s room for it to change in all sorts of ways from night to night,” he says. “At the moment, I’m working on letters specifically to Australia. I’m still trying to find out what it is that pisses you guy off, and trying to find interesting angles to take … the great thing about this show is that I can tailor the jokes specifically to the country that I’m in without disrupting the flow of things too much.” BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: Arts Centre Melbourne, Playhouse, 100 St Kilda Rd, Melbourne Dates: April 2 – April 21 (except Mondays) Time: 8.30pm Tickets: $48.50

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because that’s too much like work really.” A comedian that doesn’t like comedy is a rare creature; there is nothing comedians (well the male nerdy ones) love to do than talk about other comedians but Foot doesn’t even particularly care for talking about himself. “I don’t like to describe it (his comedy) because it’s not my job to describe it really, my job is to just create it,” he casually offers. “If I were to describe it I would say it is definitely alternative, it is definitely different to what most people are doing, it’s an unusual area. It’s very silly and to enjoy my comedy you need to be in a silly mood. It doesn’t come from a cynical place, it comes from a very silly place. Indeed recently, I mean I have been doing this for 17 years now, I thought after all these years I am no more slick than I was when I first started. I’m not a slick comedian, I mean obviously I am professional and I’ve got lots of experience, but in a way my performance has a shambolic amateurish about it which is exactly the same as it was on my very first time out. Something is unaltered.” This all makes him sound terribly pretentious but that is far from true, his is simply a very funny, exceedingly strange – on stage and possible off – man whose show will be a must see this festival. The show? Well, “There is about 40 minutes of ridiculous stories made up from my own mind,” says Foot. “And then there are airline anagrams for about six minutes, then after that it’s my madness, which is a new form of humour I have invented – none of which make any sense but is inexplicably funny.” Indeed it will be. BY JACK FRANKLIN

Venue: The Hi-Fi Bar, 125 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.15pm (Sunday 7.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $35, Full Wednesday Thursday & Sunday $31, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack and Tightarse Tuesday $28 (N/A Saturdays), Preview $26


JOSH THOMAS DOUCHEBAG

With countless television appearances, including a new series on ABC2, a near-constant presence on Twitter and a new live show every year, it seems like Josh Thomas must be one of the busiest people in the country. When I put this to the young comedian, though, he is quick to set me straight. He tells me that he has three months of the year that are busy – with the Melbourne International Comedy Festival falling smack bang in the middle – and that the rest of the time is spent pottering about in the pursuit of domestic bliss. “I spend a pretty big chunk of my year sitting in my house slowcooking meat,” he says. “I really like doing ribs and pulled pork and roast chicken and stuff. If you’re into it, you should get one of these outdoor slow-cooking barbeques – they’re really good. You can put hickory in there and it gives the meat a really sweet flavour.” Thomas recently acquired three day-old chickens, and is excited that they might start laying any day now. “I have my boyfriend and my dog and all that keeps me busy.” Thomas has quite a long history with the comedy festival – he got his first big break there as a young comic and returned several years later to host. He is now a bit of an old hand at the event. “The festival is really the apex of the year for the Australian comedy community,”

he says. “It’s funny, because I’ve been around for eight years now so I feel like I more or less know everyone now. I can walk around the festival and find that I have lots of friends there. It’s a fun month.” At this year’s event, Thomas will be performing his brand new show, Douchebag. He doesn’t want to give too much away, but tells me that the show was inspired by his fear of becoming a bad person. “I used to not like asparagus, but now I like it,” he says. “I’m worried that the next thing I like might be something really terrible – really evil. I’m worried that I might decide that I like to wear clothes made out of human skin. The show’s about that, and about mean things that I’ve done to people, douchebag things.” It’s fair to say that Thomas doesn’t leave a lot out of his comedy – he’s unafraid to plunder his personal life for his routines and lays things pretty bare. This show is no different, and in fact, might even go further than normal. “Oh yeah, you find out a lot of things about me,” he says with a nervous laugh. “With every year that goes by, my comedy gets a bit more personal. I’m starting to worry about just how much people know about my life. I’ve put every moment of the last eight years into Twitter and podcasts and the live show.” I ask Thomas if there are any lines in the sand, any areas that are just too personal, but he says that he tries not to limit himself in this way. “My whole thesis of comedy is that you want to talk about things you’re ashamed of,” he tells me. “That’s one of the great things about comics, is that they can talk about those things and then make you laugh about them. I guess I just have to be conscious of talking about other people, people besides me.” Alongside his new stand-up show, he has just premiered a brand

MATT OKINE

new comedy show on ABC2. Entitled Please Like Me, it tells the awkward story of a young man’s fumblings with his first love. “It’s going really well,” he says of the show. “Everyone is being really kind and nobody has said anything mean yet, which is really uncharacteristic of Twitter. One of the advantages of being on ABC2 is that people who hate me don’t necessarily stumble across it as readily, they’d really have to search for it if they want to hate it.” Thomas has experienced more than his share of online snark, but says that these days, it doesn’t bother him so much – especially with a Twitter army to back him up. “If someone says something mean, it goes out to roughly 200,000 teenagers, and then they tear the person apart like a pack of wolves or something!” he laughs. “I don’t know, I just don’t get some people – like, they don’t realise that not everything is for them. You’re not going to like everything, so why use all that energy getting really angry about something you don’t like?”

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BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.15pm (Sundays 7.15pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $35, Full Wednesday - Friday & Sunday $33, Conc., Group and Laugh Pack $30 (N/A Fridays and Saturdays), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $25

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“Don’t be diplomatic, it’s not funny,” I say to Matt Okine while trying, unsubtly, to incite a Twitter beef. It seems there’s nothing like asking a young comic about the wildly successful, American version of himself to start him on tirade about stand up, acting and being a semi-serious MC. “I really like Donald Glover, that’s the thing!” says Okine. “I think he’s awesome. Mind you, I was spewing when I found out about him. I kind of felt like I was the only person doing what I had been doing for like four years by that stage, and then along comes Donald Glover who’s literally better than me at everything. I kind of get frustrated when people compare me to him thinking that I’ve just seen this guy do something and I’m like, ‘Oh hey, maybe I can do that, too!’” Okine’s conversation is laden with the same mock-outrage and audible smile as it is in his stand-up, with relatable irks and nearironic expressions (“are you cereal, bro?”) that quickly endear him to audiences. It’s easy to see how he was a grand finalist in MICF’s 2004 RAW Comedy competition, his fourth ever gig, and why he was given the support slot on Aziz Ansari’s Australian tour last year on the back of being named Best Newcomer at MICF 2012. This year his career will come full circle when he’s back at RAW Comedy, this time as its host. “I always wanted to do comedy; I wanted to do the RAW competition the year before when I graduated high school, but I got in too late,” Okine says. “And now I’m hosting the grand final, which is kinda weird, because I remember when I was in my grand final performing like nine years ago. Wil Anderson and Cal Wilson were the hosts – and I’ve seen those guys doing such great things since then. I didn’t do so great in my grand final, actually. It’s kind of one of my least favourite gigs of mine ever, so hopefully I can come back with a vengeance.” But I don’t let Okine bask in his success story for too long. His comprehensive website and a too-deep Google search revealed more than just a history of hip hop mixtapes. Labels like “sell out” have been flung at Okine in the past for taking opportunities to be cast in McDonald’s advertisements, and to be named a Cleo Bachelor. But he defends his choices. “I’d like to correct you there and say that I’ve done three different McDonald’s ads in five years. Not just one ad, okay?” says Okine jovially. “Doing McDonald’s ads is one of those things that people seem very vocal and judgmental about. Like they can really hate you for doing something like that, and I’ve never understood why. McDonald’s was my first proper employer, so I had no problem with doing ads to help them out. They helped me when I was 15 years old…and let’s put forward the fact that maybe it’s because McDonald’s actually puts black people in their ads. You’re never going to see a bank ad with black people in it where they’re like, ‘We really want your money, here’s some Nigerians to prove it’. “The Cleo Bachelor thing was funny because I’ve been going out with the same girl for eight years,” he continues. “If she wants it, she can put a ring on it. I’m still living in a share house. I’m totally a bachelor.” Okine is part of a new generation beginning to gain prominence in a strengthening Australian scene, particularly at events like MICF. “There’s certainly different management groups rising up, and there’s a lot of independent acts getting a chance now,” Okine says. “I’m really excited to be a part of what I feel like is a new wave of younger and newer comedians coming through ‘cause I felt like there used to be a clique that I wasn’t a part of, and now I feel like that’s not a thing anymore, for me. It’s not stopping me from what I want to do now, so I’m really excited to make the most of it. I quite like where I’m at in Australia and I’m happy to stay here for quite a while. I really appreciate the audiences I’ve been getting and I appreciate the home-grown scene – I think if you stay in it the audiences treat you well.” BY DIJANA KUMURDIAN

Venue: Portland Hotel – Portland Room, Cnr Russell & Lt Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $25, Full Tuesday Thursday & Sunday and Conc. Friday - Saturday $20, Conc. Tuesday - Thursday & Sunday, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) and Preview $15

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SAM M COOL C

MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISTORTER

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Many comedians will tell you that they learned their craftt in childhood, while doing impressions of their friends, family and teachers, and for Sydney’s Sam McCool this was no different. “As far as my comedy career goes, I think you can trace it all the way back to school,” he tells me with a laugh. “I spent all my time just trying to make people laugh and the funniest subjects are always the ones closest to you, so I started out by making fun of a lot of the people I knew.” The cheeky young McCool found that reactions were mixed – especially where teachers were concerned. “Some embraced it and had a good time with it,” he says. “Those tended to be the teachers I liked and respected more anyway, and I knew that there was a time and a place to make jokes with them. The ones that hated it, and resisted it, were the one who bore the brunt of it, I think!” When McCool wasn’t making fun of those around him, he spent most of his time watching videos of Eddie Murphy and Lenny Henry – a career in comedy, it seems, was always on the cards. McCool developed his observational comic style over the years, but he never lost his love of impressions. These days, he’s renowned for his ability to slip into and out of various accents flawlessly. “I like to think of myself as a mirror,” he says, explaining how he picks these accents up. “For example, I’ve been hanging out with some friends from Northern England, and half the time I’ve been talking to them in their own voices. I can’t help it. I just reflect what people give, so if they don’t find it funny, then ultimately it’s their own fault!” During some recent gigs in Scotland, he put his accents to the test by going native. “I did a couple of gigs at the Edinburgh festival, and people warned me not to even try, that they’d see through it. Of course, I took that as a challenge, so I went on stage as a Glaswegian, and nobody knew the difference. A lot of people do it badly, and if you do it well, they embrace you.” Scots and Aussies, it seems, do share certain comedic sensibilities anyway. “Well yeah,” McCool laughs. “They appreciate the directness and bluntness of the Aussie sense of humour and both countries like to make fun of English

WHAT?!

people. There’s a lot in common!” The one thing McCool refuses to do is limit himself, or the issues, that he discusses. “In comedy in general, there shouldn’t be any lines in the sand,” he says. “Most comedians would agree with that. We all tend to consider it as one of the last bastions of free speech. You can go to a comedy show and hear anything, and it should be that way. The only golden rule in comedy is that it has to be funny.” As for his upcoming show, McCool is quite adamant that people take note of the title. “The show is called Multiple Personality Distorter,” he says. “But I’ve found that a lot of people glance at the poster and read it as Multiple Personality Disorder. Not everybody gets it right away, so I’d just like to stress that I’m not having a go at anyone with an actual disorder.” As for the show itself, he promises a highly interactive experience. “When I perform, it’s very much about the audience,” he says. “Each night can be subtly different, depending on who’s in the audience, how much they give back.” BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: Trades Hall – The Bookshop, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, CBD Dates: April 9 – 21 (except Monday) Times: 7.30pm (Sunday 6.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday – Sunday $25, Full Wednesday - Thursday $22, Tightarse Tuesday $18

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The compulsiveness of childhood can generate a sense off ccelebrity eleb l brity around a person that sticks with you forever, whether it’s a character from Rugrats (although Tommy seems like a smug little SOB in retrospect), or someone from school whose name is hilarious to you for no reason (why do I find Winnie Tang such an amusing name?). One of these people for me was, and remains, Irish expat/Australian comedian, Jimeoin. When I was seven my older brother and I used to watch Jimeoin, finding the eponymous comic and his English co-star Bob Franklin impossibly hilarious when they’d do things like mime laughter with a squeaky frog toy, or shoot into the air shouting “Pull!” before a rubber chicken would “die” and fall from above. But though the comic’s been well known in Australia since the early ‘90s, having starred in a few movies, made a slew of appearances on talk shows and done countless high-profile stand-up performances, he’s received relatively little attention in his native United Kingdom. That is, until a couple of years ago. “I’ve sort of been doing the UK thing the last two or three years, and that’s going really well. It’s very encouraging,” says Jimeoin. “I started my stand-up career in Australia, but it’s going really well over there now. I’ve got family over there, so it’s much more important for me to try and go over and spend time with them, as opposed to trying to make it in America. There’s a connection there. And it’s just one of those things you do, isn’t it?” While doing some research, I came across a lot of recent UK press about the comic, and bizarrely, most of it focused on his eyebrows. The stories were of course referring to a bit he did on a British stand-up series that gained him the initial attention, where he jokes that some things are made inappropriate by having your eyebrows lowered (“Do you know where the toilets are?”, “Is that your daughter?”, etc.). “I did this thing called [Michael] McIntyre’s Comedy Roadshow and I did that bit, and that’s what everyone’s seen in the UK,” Jimeoin says. “So if I don’t do the eyebrows thing they get annoyed. Some guy said to me, ‘Oh, you’re the eyebrow guy!’ People really identify with it.” The joke is pretty typical of Jimeoin’s style, which revels in absurdity and consciously avoids politicised opinions or references to pop culture. “I never really find those things funny,” he says. “It’s just like, too cool for school, sort of. More of what you would call a way of fuelling

LUKE HEGGIE

TRACY MORGAN

Voted as Sydney Time Out Magazine’s Best Comedian in 2012 and with his first stand-up attempt turning him from bottle-o rep to RAW Comedy Champion in 2010, Luke Heggie has entered the comedy scene white hot. Luke’s most recent achievement was attending New York Comedy Festival’s invite-only event that ran for a week. Spurred on by anger by all those alcoholic, workaholic, uptight, downright bastardly hobo’s who he once served, Heggie leaves you surprisingly upbeat in his latest show, Mega Dry.

Tracy Morgan is currently starring on NBC’s Emmy and Golden Globe Award-winning 30 Rock, appearing opposite Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin as ‘Tracy Jordan’, the unpredictable star of Lemon’s (Fey) hit variety show, TGS with Tracy Jordan. As a stand-up comic who has headlined across America, Tracy joined Saturday Night Live in 1996 where he appeared for seven seasons and created such memorable characters as Astronaut Jones and Brian Fellows. After leaving SNL, he went on to star in his own comedy series The Tracy Morgan Show, recorded his own HBO special Black and Blue, and released his first book I Am The New Black.

MEGA DRY

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Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 7 (except Monday) Times: 7pm (Sunday 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Sunday $39, Full Wednesday - Thursday $35, Tightarse Tuesday $30

EXCUSE MY FRENCH

Venues: Tony Starr’s Kitten Club, 1/267 Lt Collins St, CBD (Tuesdays - Saturday) & Melbourne Town Hall - Backstage Room, Corner Swanston and Collins Sts, CBD (Mondays) Dates: March 28 – April 20 (except Sundays) Times: 7.15pm (Mondays 9.30pm) Tickets: Full $22, Conc. and Group $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

Venue: The Arts Centre - Hamer Hall, 100 St Kilda Rd, CBD Date: April 13 Times: 8pm and 10pm Tickets: $69.90

HANNAH GADSBY

URZILA CARLSON ,

Like all comedians, Hannah Gadsby relishes the opportunity to hold court, but only under certain circumstances. “I’m a quiet person most of the time, so on stage it’s my time to shine. I stand up in front of a group of strangers and just tell them how it is. That’s kind of a fun thing for a person of my disposition. I speak really quietly, so in social situations I’ll often be spoken over the top of, which is cool, I’m not into effort. If someone else is more keen to talk, power to them. But in a comedy show, I am the captain,” she says. “Pick your battles, I say. To make yourself heard in a conversation requires passion and effort. In a comedy show, you just need a microphone. And you make some cash out of it. You can’t make cash out of a casual conversation.” Gadsby emerged on the Australian comedy scene circa 2006 when she took out the national finals of the RAW Comedy competition. A lesbian and art lover who was raised in the pastoral confines of Smithton, Tasmania, Gadsby has built a delightful public persona based around being a round peg in a square hole. From her very first show, Wrong and Broken, her comedy has revelled in a kind of wry outsider awkwardness where Gadsby is the hapless victim, poking and prodding at her own human foibles. She makes fun of herself for being a bit odd, and we love her for it. “People want to hear genuine stories, and you know yourself best. I’ve certainly spent plenty of time in my own head. Plus I like to think there’s a certain amount of universality to my stories though,” she says. In her latest comedy venture, Happiness Is A Bedside Table, Gadsby is mining a little bit deeper than usual for her material. This year’s show is based on an incident that occurred several years ago when Gadsby went skinny dipping and almost drowned in a rip. Hilarious, obviously, but why bring it up now? “To be honest, it was so traumatic I just shelved it. I didn’t really want to think about it,” she says. “There are some issues around the story that I’ve recently had a resolution around

Urzila Carlson is relatively new to comedy. Born in South Africa, the giggling, freewheeling Carlson made her way to New Zealand roughly half a decade ago, on Singapore Airlines, in a very small seat. “Too small really,” she says, “I think they did an experiment with me in that seat. They did have mini ice creams on the plane though.” Her reasons for leaving her homeland were largely economic – she was fleeing the oppressive 15 per cent compulsory tipping standard in South African restaurants for the bounteous land of the long white cloud, where there is no tipping at all in restaurants. It’s not quite as bad as it sounds, she remarks. “I’m not tight with money, I just don’t want to giveaway any of my own money. I don’t mind giving away other people’s money but realistically how often do you legally get your hands on other people’s money?” Getting your hands other people’s time is easier, as Urzila has discovered. Her career in comedy, launched in 2008, has given her plenty of opportunity to discuss her life with a captive audience. “I have a lot to say, and I don’t like being interrupted, so I figured I need a microphone,” she explains. “This way I get to say a lot and people don’t interrupt because they pay to see me.” Comedy is a natural fit for Urzila, who used to work in advertising as a designer and photo retoucher. With a wicked personality, Urzila is relaxed and conversational on stage; a born storyteller who likes to regale her audience with the hilarious minutia of her daily life. The simple things make her laugh, like seeing people fall over. But what kind of people laugh at her jokes? “Mostly people with a face,” she says. Dylan Moran has a face, and is a big fan of Urzila’s, calling her a “unique sort of gem” on New Zealand’s TV3. Critic Darren Bevan of TVNZ has also showered Urzila with praise, while the judges at the NZ Comedy Guild Awards have crowned her Best Female Comedian for the last three years running. Now it’s time for the people of Melbourne to vet the world’s premier South African/Kiwi comic, as Urzila makes her Melbourne International Comedy Festival debut with I’m Going

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your intellect as opposed to just having a laugh. There’s too much of it. If one person did it then you’d go, ‘I love it’, but everybody does it. Commercial radio is almost like their brief sheet.” His success in the UK continued when he sold a series he made touring regional Australia, Jimeoin Down Under, to the BBC, which is being aired for the second time this year. “It ended up being on the BBC, but before I filmed it, Channel Ten had wanted to do it. And I could feel that it just wasn’t going to work for commercial TV. So I just filmed it without having a home for it. And then I started editing it on my own and then I went, ‘I really like this. This is honest’. A lot of the time it was about technique. Any time you shove a big light and a microphone in someone’s face they sort of shut down. But every time we did it in a sneaky way – the lighting wasn’t as great and the sound wasn’t as good – but you get brilliant performances from people.” After touring his material in the UK, Jimeoin is bringing his latest show, What?! to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, where he’ll hopefully be appreciated for more than his eyebrows. “I started doing [the show] in Edinburgh last year. It sort of has no name, it’s just sort of like, ‘Urh?’, like, ‘Huh?’. I’ve had a lifetime of people saying ‘What?’ to me,” he says, laughing. “It’s more of a protest against a title – but that’s a lecture isn’t it, that’s not a comedy show.”

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TICKET ST SHO O THIS BEAT.CW AT OM.AU and it’s time to get it out. A rip is full on. There’s a massive possibility of drowning, so that’s life and death right there. That just needs to sit. That’s not a coming out story, or a riding a bike through a greenhouse story, it’s a story that needs time to gestate. It’s a different thing altogether.” The show is full of yarns about Gadsby’s every day life, past and present, but ultimately it’s about redemption she explains. “It’s about adolescence and trying to re-find the confidence that you lose when you’re going through adolescence. Those sorts of things are funny if you look at them the right way.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Supper Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7pm (Sunday 6pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $35, Full Wednesday-Friday & Sunday $28, Conc., Group and Laugh Pack $26 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $24 Extra: She is also performing Nakedy Nudes at NGV International (Clemenger BBDO Auditorium) each Saturday during the festival at 4.30pm. Tickets priced are between $20 - $16.

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To Need A Second Opinion. “[It’s about] second opinions. People who give them, people who take them, when they are helpful and when they are not. Mostly I talk about how a second opinion saved my life,” she explains, “I don’t want to ruin the ending, but I live.” She is naturally saving her best jokes for the show, but she is happy enough to reveal her least favourite joke for prospective fans now. “It’s about Kiwi’s in general and their approach to health. How they will walk around all weekend with a broken leg if they still have beer at home,” she smiles. Urzila is undaunted by the bright lights, big city feel of Melbourne’s comedy festival because she has done her research and the vibe is excellent. “I have been here before! I did it in 2012. I didn’t do my own show, I just did a ‘check out’ like you would do before showing up for a blind date. I did loads of lineup shows and performing at the Festival Club. It’s the biggest, the best, the shiniest festival with the best performers’ bar ever. The most fun you’ll have with your clothes off!” she exclaims. Make sure to welcome the happy, naked Urzila Carlson with arms wide open. BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Portico Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 - April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15pm (Sundays 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $25, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) Concession, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20


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SAMMY J

SMART CASUAL

Sammy J is back and he is alone. Just a man on stage, without props, without puppets, and possibly without pratfalls. “Chicken like, musical wordsmith. There is a lot of skinniness. At some point I’ll just have to put on heaps of weight so I have to stop trading off that but I think the word skinny only appears once or twice during this show. So it’s hopefully a progression in that sense,” notes Sammy, describing both his physical and psychological profile. Potentially finds Sammy in need of a challenge, after recent MICF shows where he and the psychotic purple puppet Randy have been getting up to continued filthy hi-jinks, he has decided to do something a bit quieter. “It’s my first solo show in a few years here which is fun,” he admits. “I did it at the Edinburgh Fringe so it’s a brand new show for Australia even though it’s been in my head for a few years, so it’s nice. It’s like secretly raising a child and unleashing it on my friends and family. I wouldn’t want people thinking it was some reheated piece of garbage. I set myself a few challenges. There’s no piano in this show so it’s me standing there with just a microphone stand which is nerve wracking. I have got nude on stage quite a lot but I’ve never felt more naked than I do when I’m standing fully clothed without a puppet or a piano to be seen.” Another challenge he has set himself is rather than fall into straight stand-up and song, is to tell a story. “When I was 11-years-old I wrote a kids book and I sent it around to publishers trying to get published, rather audaciously, and one by one they send me letters back just bagging the shit out of it,” he ruefully admits. “I learned a very hard lesson very early and so this whole show is kind of a vengeance show where I try to address their criticisms and rewrite the story book whilst perhaps taking on their advice. It was a nice little children’s book about Australian animals so there’s nothing to ruin there, but the new story is somewhat darker so the show is broken up into sections where I’m reading this new story but it sort of interweaves the story into my own life as well so it’s a bit of a spider web show. There’s lots of little threads that will all come together at the end.” It is also a chance for Sammy to stretch his legs after a few

Ben Mattick, aka Roger David, is full of radiation when we speak – literally. He may, or may not, have a broken rib that hopefully it wasn’t caused by the long lost brother that he, and fellow performer and real brother, Nick Mattick, aka Fletcher Jones, discuss in their latest show. “Everything is new,” Mattick says of The Other Brother. “If you’ve been to our show before, you won’t have seen anything in this. Me and my brother have found our estranged brother who has come into the our family through a marriage to another man. The story tells of the time from our birth up to our year six graduations.” Ok, there is no brother, and the Mattick brothers, through their musical comedy duo of Smart Casual like to explore the most absurd of hypotheticals. But the rib injury stands. Musical comedy is a hard game and given the pair are so personally familiar with each other, the process of determining what is going to stay or go within a show is a long one. “The first initial thing is if after saying a line or practicing it at least five times you’re sick of it, then get rid of it,” he says. “Then we try a lot of our stuff on those around us. Our families and partners tend to cop a lot of it as we trial it out.” Using family and partners as a measure of the quality of a comedy piece is fraught with its own problems – after all those closest to you may know you well and may also be the last people to laugh at your jokes. “My partner in particular is quite harsh, but she has a peculiar sense of humour so she’s a hard gauge,” he says. “You can’t really gauge how broad spectrums of people are going to respond until you do it to a broad range of audiences. We did do a trial show for this latest show, but a lot of the people who came were friends and family. I think if we like doing it and find it funny, that’s probably more important, because if we enjoy doing it then we’ll commit to it, and if we don’t like it it’ll come across.” Finding a balance between the comedic and musical elements of Smart Casual is something Mattick admits he occasionally struggles with. The questions always remains – how far do you focus on the musicality? “That can be tricky,” he

POTENTIALLY

THE OTHER BROTHER

years in a double act. “I didn’t want to do this show just for the sake of doing it,” he says. “When I sat down to think of ideas for a new show, the things that interested me were chances to speak for a little longer. Randy and I do shows with storylines and so it really sets the show up in a theatrical sort of way and I thought, ‘well this is a chance to actually interact with the audience a bit more.’ The big difference in this show is I’m wearing my wedding ring. That’s the difference between Sammy J, and Sammy J and Randy. I am, myself, a married 29 year old talking about my life. He’s still a freak because I am by nature an odd human but it’s a little more real world which is exciting. It’s a nerdfest, it’s very much based around words and language, reflections and philosophies. “Every element of this show is sort of like a Jenga tower,” he enthuses. “Everything is interconnected and the songs might be okay on their own, but they really rely on each other to hold it together so at the very least that’s a warning for people not to turn up late because the whole show is set up in the first five minutes and it sort of flows on from there. I also try to take it on some semblance of a journey so when people leave the show, even if they hate it, they can’t deny they were taken through a beginning a middle and an end.” BY JACK FRANKLIN

Venue: The Arts Centre – Fairfax Studio, 100 St Kilda Rd, CBD Dates: April 9 - 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.30pm (Sundays 6.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $35, Conc. Friday - Saturday $30, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $28.90, Conc. Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $25.90, Group $25, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20

PAJAMA MEN

NICK CODY

Our love affair began in 2009 when the Pajama Men performed in a tent in the middle of Melbourne’s City Square. The following year, they smashed all previous box office records at London’s Soho Theatre and have produced the highest rated show at the Edinburgh Fringe, the world’s largest arts festival. They are a joy to behold. Now a brand new show from the masters of physical comedy will have its world premiere at the 2013 Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

After a roaring year jam-packed with successful shows spanning as far as Werribee Football Club to the Big Apple, Nick Cody brings it home to Melbourne, mischievous as ever in his new show Inappropriate. Only 25-years-old, Nick has made quite an impression on the comedy scene, selling out two seasons of shows at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, and is just as popular online with at least half a million views on YouTube. Hilariously inappropriate it’s no wonder famous comedians like Jim Jefferies, Anthony Jeselnik and Bill Burr regularly request Nick to open on tour.

JUST THE TWO OF EACH OF US

Venue: Arts Centre Melbourne - Fairfax Studio, 100 St Kilda Rd, Southbank Dates: April 4 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9pm (Sundays 8pm, April 4 9.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $38, Full Wednesday – Thursday & Sunday $33, Group and Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $31, Conc. (N/A Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $28

BY KRISSI WEISS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Lunch Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sundays 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $26.90, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $24, Conc., Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) $20, Group, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $18

WIN

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Venue: Tony Starr’s Kitten Club, 1/267 Lt Collins St, Melbourne Dates: March 28 – April 20 (except Sundays and Mondays) Time: 8.30pm Tickets: Full $22, Conc. and Group $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

WIN

ASHER TRELEAVEN

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BAD DANDY

LET S DO THIS

22

says. “We tend to take the piss out of a lot of music styles and I think that’s a very key thing to mix with the comedy. I’m from a musical background – I play in bands and stuff – so I sometimes tend to get carried away with the music stuff and sometimes I completely forget that this is comedy. But I do want to do something that’s musically interesting for me and also quite funny. I think if a choice or part is just there for the music then I shouldn’t do it but if it is carrying the humour then it stays.” Smart Casual’s upcoming Melbourne shows may be their last for a little while. “I’m going back to uni to study teaching,” says Mattick. “But I’ll do that via correspondence so we can still do some festivals. We want to write a lot of new stuff after this for our smaller gigs. Most of this material is so specific to the show that we feel we can’t use it in any other gigs.”

INAPPROPRIATE

DEANNE SMITH , Everyone has an origin story. DeAnne Smith’s interest in comedy spiked with a few spins of hit-and-miss stand-up. “I was teaching in English in Mexico and my girlfriend gave me this CD. She was like ‘maybe you can use this with your English classes!’ So I started listening to it and I felt like this anger, this frustration – ‘I really want to do this!’ – I was listening to stuff that I liked, that inspired me and stuff that I didn’t like at all, which made me feel ‘I could do that better!’. It does feel like a compulsion.” She resolved to pursue comedy and, sure enough, Smith found herself playing some of the world’s best festivals. Fellow comic Kathleen Madigan would help quell Smith’s anxieties early on, armed with sage advice. “We were both in the Just For Laughs festival together. I was terrified. She was hosting the show and I was backstage. It was the first time that I’d done a big show like that, it was my first time in Just For Laughs, so I was really nervous, my parents were there for the first time, so I felt all this pressure,” recalls Smith. “We were backstage and she said, ‘are you nervous?’ and I was like, ‘yeah, I’m nervous!’ “She goes, ‘let me tell you something: if you bomb out there, nothing’s gonna happen. If you kill out there, nothing’s gonna happen. This is comedy: nothing happens.’ Whoa! Alright, thanks! It actually made me feel a lot calmer about my set and then alternately depressed about what’s possible in comedy.” However, Smith’s passion for stand-up always prevails. “The longest break I ever took from comedy was for about two weeks. I was visiting my sister in Philadelphia and at the end of the two weeks, I found myself in my car driving these really bad neighbourhoods...neighbourhoods that start off fine but then there’s a few broken windows and then there seems to be a lot of advertising for liquor stores and pawn shops,” she explains. “I was in pursuit of this open mic and I thought: ‘This is exactly what people who are addicted to drugs do - driving around at night through sketchy neighborhoods, looking for a fix.’” Smith’s comedy combines razor-sharp repartee with ukulele tunes. Her superficial affection for the instrument led to an impulse purchase. “I have to be honest with you, I have no musical background. I was actually in Melbourne a few years ago and I hadn’t really seen a ukulele. It was a little bit before the

WIN

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WIN

TICKET S SHO TO THIS BEAT.CW AT OM.AU ukulele boom, which I feel like we’re in right now b because a llott of people play,” she muses. “So basically, I just walked by this store, saw one in the window and thought, ‘That’s cute!’ Then I walked past the next day and thought, ‘That’s pretty cute!’ And apparently I can only pass the ukulele three times before I buy one, so I just bought one. It’s only four strings, it’s tiny and it’s pretty easy to learn. I’ve had a good time just figuring out some chords and basically tricking everyone into thinking I can play the ukulele.” Smith has cast a spell upon Melbourne in recent years. She returns to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival with a brand new show. “One of my best friends in Canada pointed out that I have a couple of catchphrases that I say a lot in life – not necessarily on stage. One of them is ‘let’s do this!’ and the other one is ‘it’s all happening!’ I thought, ‘you know what? I’m going to just take that phrase that I use all the time and title my show that!’ So the show’s Let’s Do This, which also gives me the opportunity to give people buttons on the way out that say, ‘I did it with DeAnne Smith’. I just got a bunch of those ordered and I’m pretty excited about it.” BY NICK MASON

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Cloak Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 - April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9:45pm (Sundays 8:45pm) Tickets: Full $25, Concession, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20

Asher Treleavan is a fancy man who likes to flap his arms around and moves a bit like spaghetti. He debuted on the comedy festival scene in 2008, with a show called Cellar Door, which featured Alec Guinness and some very bad books. In 2009 he returned with a Moosehead-funded show called Open Door, which amongst other things included a four-minute Justin Timberlake-backed dance routine, and was nominated for the Barry Award. Treleaven’s 2010 production, Secret Door, won The Age critic’s prize and then Best Newcomer at the Edinburgh Festival. After that came Matadoor in 2011 and Troubadour in 2012. “This year at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival I decided I’d write the best comedy show I’ve ever written,” says Treleaven. “I was drinking a lot of absinthe and my agent told me to write a really edgy show, so I’m reinventing myself this year as edgy.” In 2013, Treleaven has taken the radical step of naming his show something that does not involve the word ‘door’ (or ‘dour’, pronounced ‘door’). This year, Asher Treleaven is Bad Dandy. Why? “It’s a good title that fucking pops! This year it’s all about showbiz, showbiz and busy legs!” he says excitedly. Those familiar with Treleaven’s legs know that they are circus-trained and have made the odd appearance in La Clique. What you may not know is that Treleaven’s fingers and brain wrote for the Huffington Post while at the Edinburgh Festival last year, a four-part blog based around Edward De Bono’s Six Thinking Hats. The first entry was called One Hat Two Hat White Hat Blue Hat. His third post was about trying to remain positive despite his nature. “Boundless positivity is an unnatural quality in a comedian,” he wrote, “We are typically wingers, critics and smart asses who endlessly seek out things that irk and irritate to parody, satirise and attack.” At the end of the blog post, Treleaven urged people and comedians to remember that a comedian’s first job is to spread mirth and positivity – a lesson he completely forgot when writing the synopsis for Bad Dandy. The show is described as “vigorous gesticulating and impotent left-wing rage from Melbourne’s favourite foppish idiot.” “In this modern era of moral decline,” the press release continues, “Atheism, overpopulation, drugs, pornography, capitalism and climate change, is there any hope for the future? If we believe the newspapers, scientists or the internet, the answer is no.” When you put it like that, everything seems awful. We all know that the internet will one day become sentient and start self-producing child pornography; we’ve seen the horrible things it does already. Treleaven won’t

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even talk about the worst thing he’s seen online, not even when directly asked. “I don’t want to talk about it, if you don’t mind,” he says, “The true answer to this question from any individual would be horrible. Someone pooing on the arm of a guy asleep at a party and then a tiger getting him or something.” But actually, Bad Dandy is not about grimness and misery. It is about false nostalgia. “The show is about the good old days,” Treleaven explains. “The worst joke is something something AIDS something.” When pressed, Treleaven says that there is plenty of hope for the future, so long as you are not a 1940s woman or an Indian child. “A child born in the worst slum in India will live longer than the richest person a hundred years ago, but will have less fun than a woman born 60 years ago.” As to what we can hope for, Treleavan has a clear vision for the future. “Cars that run on carbon dioxide and produce laughing gas mixed with ozone,” he says, pragmatically. When it comes to his professional future, Treleaven is quite upbeat. His short, but illustrious career remains promising. “I’ve definitely declined quite a lot, but as time goes on and I look back, I realise that as I’ve declined I’ve actually gotten a lot better,” he says. BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Victoria Hotel - Vic’s Bar, 215 Lt Collins St, Melbourne Dates: March 28 - April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $25, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20


DAVE HUGHES FREEZER BREAD

Dave Hughes is still an ordinary bloke. Just ask his wife. At the end of the day Melbourne’s most beloved breakfast radio host and The Project’s most acerbic commentator goes home to Mrs Hughes and the three Little Hughesies and does absolutely ordinary things, like eating defrosted bread out of the freezer. “Waste not, want not,” says Mrs Hughes. The problem is that Dave Hughes thinks a man as successful as Dave Hughes shouldn’t have to eat defrosted bread out of the freezer, or bread that has been nibbled by the cat. And since he’s not getting anywhere trying to reason with his wife about it, he has turned his bread-related woes into a new show for the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. “It’s about the daily interactions, you know, when you hook up with someone who’s not exactly the same as you are – someone who doesn’t have exactly the same outlook on what you do with bread,” he drawls. Mrs Hughes is the long-suffering subject of Dave’s comedy, although much of it flies under the radar these days.

“We have three children under four, so she claims she’s so tired now that she can’t even be bothered thinking about it,” he smiles. “In a way, that’s probably good for me. I work so much and leave her to do all the household duties, including looking after our three children, but it gives me the advantage that she can’t be bothered focusing on the fact that I may be disrespecting her in my workplace.” Not that Dave is hiding anything. Mrs Hughes (aka Holly Ife) is always welcome to tune in to Nova or stop by one of Dave’s rare stand-up shows. “I always encourage my wife to come!” he says. “Although I prefer to know she’s there, you know what I mean? One year, I found out that she’d secretly seen the show. She said something one night and I was like, ‘Wait, have you fuckin’… you’ve been, haven’t you?’ She had to admit it then. I think she wanted to see if I’d change the show, knowing she was in the room. I might do it, too. If I knew she was there. I wouldn’t call a woman in the front row beautiful, for example. That would cause a lot of unnecessary trouble.” Dave assures us that Mrs Hughes is actually a very good sport and more than accustomed to having her private life turned inside out for public entertainment. When they met, Hughesy was already on the radio so Holly knew his shtick. He counts himself lucky to have a wife with a great sense of humour, even if she doesn’t always show it.

TRIPOD

MEN OF SUBSTANCE

“She dropped the c-bomb to me recently. She’s at home with three children who are very cute but they’re not great conversationalists, so when I get home apparently I should be chatting to her. I guess I understand that, but the other night I was trying to read a book and she wanted me to have a conversation with her. I asked her if she had a book to read, and she called me a cunt, basically. That’s what you get for asking your wife if she wants to read,” he shrugs. “I accept that.” Dave takes it on the chin, because he knows he will have his revenge on the stage. He has the whole world on his side. Mrs Hughes is doing fine, mind you, since she has the kids on hers. “A very cute thing happened the other day. My son said to my wife, ‘Mummy, I think you should go on The Project so that people stop you in the street and ask for photos.’ How cute is that? Obviously, walking around Melbourne with my kids, I do get asked for photos a lot. Rafferty, who’s almost four, has grown up with that. I always wondered if he thought it was unusual – he’s never commented to me that it is. I want him to think that it’s unusual! I want him to think his dad’s special! Apparently he just reckons I’m hogging the spotlight.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: The Comedy Theatre, Cnr Exhibition & Lonsdale Sts, CBD Dates: March 26 – 31 Times: 8.30pm (Sunday 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $45, Preview $35

M A RY T O B I N P R E S E N T S WIN

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Venue: Upstairs Lounge @ Hairy Little Sista, 240 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (Except Mondays) Time: 10:30pm Tickets: Full $21, Group and Conc. $16, Tightarse Tuesday $14

is

THE SPOKESMAN

★★★★★

“The Man is Funny! ... at the top of his craft!” FIVEAA.COM

!

28 MAR–21 APR ATHENAEUM THEATRE TO O M PE OR NS RO W

Tripod are back with a brand new show, with The Famous Spiegeltent to host to their shenanigans this comedy festival season. According to vocalist/guitarist Steven Gates, the group’s beach-based sabbaticals inspired Men Of Substance. “We do this thing called ‘band camp’, where we go away for a weekend down to Yonny’s holiday house – the old family holiday house down at Point Leo – and basically we make each other meals, we write songs and write music. That’s also been an interesting thing, because originally we would work from 10am - 5pm everyday and tour as well... and basically just work... especially when we started making a living from it.” But working the daily grind, even in music-comedy, has its drawbacks. “We burned ourselves out doing that. We didn’t have a regimented way of working. We just worked a lot,” Gates recalls. “During Skithouse and things, we were in and out of each other’s pockets all the time. We kind of drove each other mental. Now we delegate little bits of time to the jobs we need to do and with this new show, Men Of Substance, all these songs from band camp started surfacing. The show sort of found itself.” Once upon a time, Tripod told the tale of Tosswinkle the Pirate. These days, the trio present themselves as Men Of Substance, their new comedy festival show taking on a different focus entirely. “It’s kind of about turning 40. We’ve got to be clear: it’s not a show that only 40-yearold people will admire,” Gates reveals. “We started writing a song called Adult Contemporary, which is just about not wanting to listen to loud music anymore and only wanting to listen to those ten albums you’ve got. You’ve basically stopped growing at that point. You might see a band at Day On The Green, where they’ve got nice amenities, just good toilet and good food setups. But in terms of Big Day Out and all of that sorta stuff? ‘Nup! No!’ Anything that’s too loud, is just too... those things do happen! That sort of stuff is real to us.” Ironically, it’s these sorts of events and experiences that contribute to Tripod’s comedy. “I think whenever we put together a show – and in the rehearsing of the songs, especially – we find little interesting lines, or stuff we want to talk about or touch on in between. Usually that just comes out of improvising together and doing outdoor music festivals and stuff.” Gates says. “We generate a lot of material doing that sort of stuff, trying stuff out in those kinds of environments, because we rarely do comedy rooms anymore or comedy spots, only because it’s just too much of a hassle for the venue: we need to do a soundcheck... we need it sounding really good.” As Tripod edge towards two decades together in the comedy game, it’s clear they’re a well-oiled machine. “Being together for so long is great, because you know each other’s language. We have a vocabulary. We know how to get a point across the line in a really indirect way. We know all the politics,” Gates muses. “But most importantly, we know that the show is good. We know that the material we’re making now is good and we have a better idea now what’s going on, which makes the whole process easier.” Gates puts Tripod’s appeal down to the incongruous nature of the group. “For me, its from the outset, just looking at the stage and going, ‘Where the fuck did these three guys come from? How do they know each other?’ Because we’re so different in appearance, we have different performance styles.” As such, Gates continues to relish a role distinct from his comedy colleagues. ‘When we write a show or a narrative, we really go into our ‘characters’. I’m a massive knob-jockey, I’m an absolute dickhead who’s full of himself and wants to show off all the time. It’s a character I love playing! I love playing a monumentally stupid person. “We bring our separate talents, like some sort of ‘super team’,” declares Gates, before brushing off any suggestions they’re comedy’s Justice League. “It’s more of a Marvel, ‘mutants’ type scenario.”

132 849 OR COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU ATHENAEUM 9650 1500

BY NICK MASON

Venue: The Famous Spiegeltent, 100 St Kilda Rd, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 14 (except Mondays) Times: 8.45pm (Sundays 7.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Sunday $39, Full Wednesday Thursday $35, Tightarse Tuesday $30

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EDDIE PEPITONE When I asked a random person at this year’s MICF launch if he had any tips for this year’s festival he replied before I had even finished my question. “Eddie Pepitone. Saw him in New York. Never laughed so much in my life.” This guy had seen over 100 shows last year (and was a former Funny Tonne winner as it turned out). I then prayed to Galaxy Overlord Google to show me Eddie Pepitone clips on YouTube, and found the trailer of a recent documentary on Pepitone, The Bitter Buddha. Zach Galifianakis, Sarah Silverman, Patton Oswalt and other huge names in comedy all appear in it. At one point, Dana Gould describes Pepitone as “the guitarist that all the other guitarists go to see”. Despite appearing in countless films, television programmes and podcasts, he remains somewhat of a cult figure in the comedy scene, yet a hero among his colleagues. His comedy isn’t based on cute little jokes. Instead, he fearlessly bawls the truth, mostly in the form of a sardonic, extended rant. “I am just going to do what I do, which is bellow loudly and acerbically about my rage toward life and myself,” Pepitone says of his upcoming visit to Australia. “On stage you are given the freedom to act like a lunatic, while in real life you have to be civil. I take a part of me and heighten it for the stage.” The Bitter Buddha is currently screening across America, with no Australian release date announced. Despite not knowing Pepitone personally, it seemed ridiculous to assume he of all people would enjoy being followed around by a camera crew. “At first I was highly doubtful that I would be able to put up with the cameras and still be myself and feel comfortable, but after the first couple of shoots I completely relaxed into it and started to enjoy being filmed. God, I love being the centre of attention!” One of his most widely-loved creations is the web series Puddin’. The show, in which most episodes are about a minute long, is uploaded to YouTube almost daily. The set-up is mostly the same: an office employee is quietly eating pudding in an office kitchen until Pepitone walks in and starts ranting at him. A favourite of mine is when Pepitone disturbs the man eating pudding and asks, “I’m gonna need you to sign these contracts here, and here, and here. Oh, and the fog has lifted from my mind, revealing the infinite chasm of nothingness that is my soul, and I was wondering if you could make the fog settle in again, so I DON’T HAVE TO HEAR GOD’S MOCKING LAUGH. I DON’T WANNA HEAR IT! CAN YOU DO IT?! If not, no big deal.” Episodes of Puddin’ have

SHANE DUNDAS BELIEVE featured celebrities such as Robin Williams, Patton Oswalt and Megan Amram. “The best part [about making Puddin’] is saying and doing things that couldn’t be done anywhere else…the networks wouldn’t dream of doing material like that. It’s just so refreshing to absolutely be myself with no filters,” says Pepitone. “My favourite [episode] is hard to pick. Maybe the one with David Koechner having sex with me and Dana Gould walks in just talking casually while I get raped.” Pepitone’s hysterical, roaring delivery is effective largely due to the detectable tone of honesty – a notion confirmed by Pepitone himself when talking about what would be his ultimate accomplishment in comedy — “To get out of it.” “No seriously it would be to leave behind a body of work that people would say, ‘wow he tried to speak the truth and was hysterical doing it’.” This is further emphasised by his recently tweeted, mysterious photo of himself in theoretical linguist/philosopher/ all-round academic god Noam Chomsky’s office. “I actually didn’t meet him. I went to meet him and he wasn’t there. I got the tour of his modest office. He is an inspiration to me; speaking truth to power. Such integrity. I try to have that integrity in my work.” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 2 – 7 (as part of Headliners) Times: 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $35, Wednesday Thursday & Sunday $31, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $30, Conc. (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $28 Extra: He also plays a solo show at Victoria Hotel’s Banquet on Friday April 5 at 11pm for $20. His documentary The Bitter Buddha will screen The Hi-Fi on April 6 for $12.50.

Shane Dundas has spent much of his career as 50 per cent of The Umbilical Brothers — the rubber-limbed, Perriernominated surrealist super-duo who have appeared on Letterman, produced their own kids’ show for Disney (The Upside Down Show), and generally made milk shoot out of noses for two decades or so. But even though the Umbies continue to do their thing, Dundas has taken the bold step into part-time solo performance with Believe. “After about 20 years of doing the duo thing I thought I should see whether I can do this solo thing,” says Dundas. “There are certain ideas that can only be tried as a solo thing. Believe is all about that relationship with the audience. It’s a one-on-one group relationship and this show is about getting the audience to believe in stuff that I’m saying even when they realise that what I’m saying is bullshit.” As Dundas puts it, we live in a world founded on the suspension of disbelief, rather than a world of belief. “We’re given so much information and we don’t believe in any of it, really, [we] just choose to believe certain things,” he explains. “So the idea of the show is, I’m trying to do a stand-up show, but the underlying idea is, can the audience go along with me even when they realise what I’m saying can’t be trusted?” The show has been performed a few times in different cities - about six weeks of stage time - including workshops at the Melbourne Fringe Festival, then a few shows in Canberra and a run at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. “I got crushed by the Edinburgh monster!” laughs Dundas. “It’s really hard to get the recipe for this show working because it’s not really stand-up. It’s this thing underneath the stand-up. By the time I got it working it was the end of the festival, so it was a real wake-up call for me. I’m used to having a lot more success with the Umbies, and it was sort of sobering to be on the other side of that!” So what’s it like to transition to stand-up after a career spent in a more choreographed form like physical comedy? “It’s the ultimate challenge,” he notes. “When you’re with a duo you’ve got a permanent security blanket right there and it’s all down to you. Whether you kill or whether you die, it’s all down to you. And I need that challenge after all this time.”

RUBY WAX

SARAH MILLICAN

Writer, comedienne, interviewer and documentary-maker Ruby Wax will lead audiences through the bittersweet ups and downs of mental illness, it’s stigmas, and the freedom discovered when you share life’s darkest moments. Out of Her Mind touches on envy, fame, television, the insatiable drive to win, getting rich, getting the perfect body, marriage, kids, careers, and, above all, staying busy while looking like you’re having a nice day.

Sarah Millican is returning to Melbourne to give audiences another taste of her deliciously dirty ways. Star of the BBC’s Sarah Millican Television Programme, Millican is settling down (taking her bra off), learning to cook (roasting rather than toasting), and even raising a child (her cat). In Homebird expect to learn what to take on a dirty weekend, the easiest way to blend in posh restaurants and how to teach pensioners to swear.

OUT OF HER MIND

Venues: Forum Theatre - Upstairs, 154 Flinders St, CBD (Thursday - Sunday, Tuesday - Friday) & Melbourne Town Hall - Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD (Monday) Dates: March 28 – April 5 Times: 9pm (Sunday 8pm, Monday 6.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $40, Full Wednesday – Thursday & Sunday $38, Group and Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $34, Conc. (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $33 and Preview $30

BEV KILLICK

GOES “THERE”...AGAIN

PIECE OF CAKE

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In a way, Dundas is sort of - kind of - looking forward to those moments where he will have to fight to win the audience back after a dead gag. “That is what I’m aiming for,” he says. “Particularly in Edinburgh there were some passages where I was losing the audience and I had to think of how to make it work. “Maybe some people will think a particular bit is antiChristian, for example, but that’s not what it’s about. It’s about belief. How can I get the audience to realise what’s going on there, so that they’re not put off by something that’s just obviously there? How can I fine-tune it? How can I fix that relationship with the audience?” With all this activity you’d be forgiven for thinking it’d be a while before you see the Umbies again, but they’re still very much active. “We’re creating a new theatre show,” he explains. “It’s a kid’s show that’s not suitable for children. I can’t wait to take that one around!” Pee-Wee Herman had a similar concept recently where he essentially created an adult version of PeeWee’s Play House, to huge critical and audience acclaim. “It’s us trying to do a live kid’s show where whatever can go wrong will go wrong. So it’s exactly what a kid should not be watching. We’ll probably end up in Melbourne next year with this show. But right now my challenge is making Melbourne laugh with Believe at this comedy festival.” BY PETER HODGSON

Venue: The Portland Hotel - Gold Room, 127 Russell Street, Melbourne Dates: March 28 – April 21 Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7:30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Sunday $27.50, Conc. Friday - Sunday $25, Tuesday - Thursday $20

HOMEBIRD

THE KRANKSY SISTERS Since being nominated for the coveted Barry Award and winning The Age Critics Award in 2004, the talented ,and more than slightly odd, Kransky Sisters have been a highlight of the comedy festival. This year, the sisters return with their new show, Piece of Cake. The show features the fictional familial three-piece doing what they do best, performing their own arrangements of popular songs. “We’d listen to the wireless, you see,” says older sister Mourne, explaining how the Kransky Sisters, once described as a cross between the Sugababes and the Addams Family, came to include songs by MC Hammer, George Michael, Pink Floyd and AC/DC in their repertoire. “We started playing music young. Our father played the violin until mother stopped it. He gave Eve the saw-bow after his cabinet-making days were over. A neighbour gave me an old guitar and we had the old reed keyboard our mother owned. We pulled it out of the cupboard one day and started plonking away. It was a relief from the realities of home.” Elder sisters Mourne and Eve have proudly taught themselves their multiple instruments while Dawn, the tuba-playing youngest sister, is the only one who’s had a musical education. “Eve and I feel proud that we’ve achieved what we have without the use of a teacher,” asserts Mourne. “We’re not these fancy pants, nambypamby people who talk about their education all the time.” Mourne’s love of music is obvious. “Music warms the soul, doesn’t it? You only have to open the back door and the birds are singing. Nature is full of it. It’s nice to sing songs that make us happy, and make us sad, and make us remember to be happy or sad. Make us remember to remember. Remember to remember things. That’s what songs are for,” she philosophises. The Sisters have, however, occasionally struggled to process the reactions of their audiences to their show. “Sometimes the reactions can be quite interesting. We

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TICKET S SHO TO THIS BEAT.CW AT OM.AU nd oursel lves at wonder sometimes whether we’ve found ourselves a comedy festival and didn’t realise,” muses Mourne. “I suppose sometimes when you don’t mean to be funny, people laugh. You’ve got to put on your best shoes and walk forwards rather than backwards, otherwise you’ll trip. And it’s not a good idea in clogs. I tripped once down the back stairs and landed on the cat. “At first we were a bit concerned that people seemed to find us funny. All we’re doing is speaking from the heart about our lives and I suppose if someone smiles at that then it’s a good thing for them to have a bit of cheer in their day.” Despite her love of music Mourne has, on occasion, considered switching careers to pursue a post in local politics. “I was thinking of going for Mayor of Esk,” says the Queenslander. “I wouldn’t mind going up against that one on the Opposition side either, the one who wears the bikini pants. I’d like to give him a run for his money.” The eldest Kransky has been spurred on in her political ambition by the election of Campbell Newman as the State’s Premier, the man she says the locals call Cannibal Newman. “It’s probably a figure of speech, but one never knows.” BY JOSH FERGEUS

Venue: The Hi-Fi, 125 Swanston Street, CBD Dates: April 9 – 21 (except Monday) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Sunday $39, Full Wednesday - Thursday $35, Tightarse Tuesday $30

The outrageous Bev Killick is back at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival this year with a new and improved version of her show from last year Bev Killick Goes There. “I’m building on some of the stories that I did last year,” says Killick. “I’ve had quite a big year so there will be a lot more stories. I’m just putting myself out there and having some fun. I’m telling some stories that I wouldn’t normally tell on a mainstream stage. I tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth. “The interesting thing is that people still go ‘oh that’s too much’, but it’s all in the title!” muses Killick. “I say it straight up too – ‘I’m going to go there, are you ready? Are you sure?’ People just think it’s all going to be nice because you’re a female comedian. It’s the sort of conversation you’d have sitting around with you best girlfriends.” But you get the impression that, unlike some comics, Killick doesn’t change too much off stage. “I think sometimes people who know me can be a bit frightened to ask the question because I’m just going to give them the answer. I don’t beat around the bush.” Killick, the star and co-writer of the hugely popular boobbased Busting Out!, has had a busy year. “I’ve been playing different characters, putting myself in situations and chucking them up on YouTube,” says Killick. “I interviewed Ron Jeremy late last year. I stormed the Eros Shine Awards and fooled a lot of people into believing I was an interviewer. I got some excellent interviews with porn stars.” Jeremy even complimented Killick on her breasts, and he’s seen a few. Killick is looking forward to bringing these new stories to the stage, even though she’s expecting some minor backlash. “I had a really great time last year and two fantastic audiences,” she remembers. “They were really good shows but one review said it was a bit too much when I got into this idea about women my age having their libido drop off even though their husbands doesn’t. I came up with this idea of having your husband serviced by a Mr. Whippy van providing ‘services’ to husbands in different areas. Then I’d be able to just watch True Blood like I want to. This one reviewer thought this was

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Venue: Victoria Hotel - Banquet Room, 215 Little Collins St, CBD (March 27, April 2) & Forum Theatre - Downstairs, Cnr Flinders & Russell Sts, CBD (March 28 - 31) Dates: March 27 – April 2 (except Monday) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday – Saturday $36, Full Wednesday – Thursday & Sunday $33, Group and Laugh Pack $31, Tightarse Tuesday and Conc. (N/A Saturday) $28, Preview $25

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completely rotten to the core. She thought it was terrible stuff coming from a woman, but seriously they’re just jokes.” Despite the odd reaction off this kind, Killick loves her work and has no intention of toning it down. “I love stand up as an art form,” she asserts. “You can say that suff which no-one is game to say. That’s where you get those wonderful laughs from, it’s exciting. So many women I talk to think that idea was fabulous, what a great idea. It’s that water cooler stuff y’know? A bit of gossip and just taking a few topics and turning them upside down with a few of my own real stories thrown in. More often than not when I tell my stories people think that I’m exaggerating but strange shit just finds me.” With the success of Busting Out!, having co-written a new musical, and with a short film soon to be screening at the Ohio Film Festival, Killick has her hands well and truly full. “I’ve got around seven or eight things on the boil, and I’m a mother of two and everything else that goes with it. Every one of them excites me.” BY JOSH FERGEUS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Powder Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 1, 8, 15 Time: 8.30pm Tickets: $25


KITTY FLANAGAN

HELLO KITTY FLANAGAN For those of you living under a rock, Kitty Flanagan is pretty much adorable. Smart, sexy, down-to-Earth and almost constantly funny, the ex-Full Frontal performer has in recent years become one of Australia’s best-known comics. “Two words really: The Project,” Kitty says. “I owe them for putting my head on the telly and letting a much bigger audience find me. It’s a rare thing for a comedian to be given such a regular platform, allowed to do two minutes of funny each week on national telly on ‘whatever topic you want’. That’s a pretty good gig.” Every Tuesday Kitty beams in live from Sydney to ruminate on topics as varied as Oprah, religion and the cost of raising kids; everyday subjects that would seem tired in the hands of a different comedian but find a new zest in Kitty’s able hands. Her jokes are often set in the domestic terrain of schools and supermarkets and they are always relatable, particularly to

women – just don’t call her a ladies’ comic. “My audience is always really mixed, old and young, ladies and non-ladies, gays and ungays. The term ‘ladies’ comic’ is a bit weird, it sounds like I should be entertaining the female characters of Downtown Abbey who have retired to the drawing room while the gentlemen remain at the table for serious man talk,” Kitty smiles. Her antics are for everyone and anyone who enjoys watching a talented performer ruin themselves for the sake of a laugh. “I tell stories and anecdotes that are (hopefully) funny. I mock stuff that needs mocking. I also roll all over the stage like an idiot. I have a compressed disc, a pinched nerve and a regular appointment with a physio to prove it.” In her latest comedy festival show, Kitty continues her grand televised tradition of asking stupid but vital questions: What’s wrong with teenagers? Why are babies so angry? What snack foods should be avoided when dating? Should cabaret be outlawed? What makes ham so delicious? These queries and more come under microscope in Hello Kitty Flanagan. Fresh from road-testing the show at the Adelaide Fringe Festival, Kitty has decided that the overarching theme is ‘here’s what I reckon...who’s with me?’ “I feel like I go out every night and try to start a lame, middle class riot, railing against things like the cold storage of fruit and how it is to blame for apples no longer being crunchy and juicy but rather soft, floury, fruits of disappointment,”

CLAIRE HOOPER

BY SIMONE UBALDI

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Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins Street, CBD Dates: April 9 – 21 (except Monday) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Sunday $39, Full Wednesday - Thursday $35, Tightarse Tuesday $30

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BY KRISSI WEISS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Cloak Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $32, Full Wednesday - Friday & Sunday $28, Conc., Group and Laugh Pack $26 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $24

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Claire Hooper: lovable girl-next-door, cheeky and confrontational comedian (who manages to leave just enough to innuendo to make you feel like the filthy one), smart and self-directed artist, and lover of plums. When the lights are off and Hooper is in conversation-mode you see what a dichotomous personality she has, somehow at once brimming with self-confidence and selfeffacement. “I knew I was going to do a show and the idea of plums was just kind of presented to me,” Hooper says of her show’s ambiguous title. “I can’t give too much away but plums seem to be a recurring theme in my life. For example, I have some plum trees in my backyard and it is the only thing my husband and I fight over, ever, and when we do it’s vicious. We had another fruit tree in the back yard and I came home one day and he’d chopped it down, I think if that happens with the plum trees well, that’ll be it really.” After a successful stint as team captain on Good News Week (although that does mean enduring Paul McDermott’s singing – in person) Hooper moved into breakfast radio in Sydney for two years. Yes, that cultureless, explicit beast that can make or, more often, break a comedian’s soul. Plums is, in a small way, also a response to that time. “I had just finished two years in commercial radio and I really thought I’d taken a match to that time and thrown it over my shoulder on the way out but I can’t completely escape it,” she says. So were they really that bad? “No they were lovely but it just wasn’t for me. I really never thought of myself as, um, elitist, but I guess I am. I didn’t like the music, I didn’t like the things we were discussing, I didn’t like any of it. They didn’t want me to change myself at all but by the very fact I had to repeatedly talk about TV shows like My Kitchen Rules, I wasn’t being me, you know?” Stand-up comedy, TV and radio – all of these things put you in the forefront of the public eye and it’s easy for us mere mortals to forget that the public eye is not just a sea of strange faces. In that packed out auditorium or on the other end of that satellite signal could be any number of ghosts from the past. “I’ve managed to avoid the whole Facebook and Twitter social media thing so I can live in the delusion that I’ve kept the people from my past that I no longer want in my life out of it,” she says with a laugh. “On television or even on stage you have to forget that everyone can find you there. I had to stop thinking about the fact my mum was watching or the guy I lost my virginity to in high school that I never want to see was watching or else I couldn’t survive. I’ve tried being one of those comedians that just comes out with oneliners but it seems people don’t want that from me.” After Plums, Hooper has a stack of ideas for future work involving some television concepts and a truly awesome book idea that Hooper has a little regret about revealing. “Oh god you’re gonna steal it aren’t you?” she says with a wry chuckle. Pinky swear I won’t.

“…A trio of punchline-perfect Poms made for a fast-paced show. Best outcome possible” EVERGUIDE 2012

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she explains. “I whip the audience into a frenzy where they’re right on the verge of rioting...until they realise a nice, postshow, glass of wine would be far more enjoyable.” Kitty’s powers of trivial observation are boundless. With years of comedy under her belt, it’s hard to know how she keeps finding things to talk about – especially when you factor in her weekly TV gig. “Honestly, it hurts my head,” she admits. “I work harder on a Tuesday than any other time. It takes me the whole day to come up with two minutes of material which is quite embarrassing, I’d like to tell you I just make it up on the spot but I don’t, I think about it all day long. “I think it’s less about inspiration and more about discipline. On the rare occasion I stop procrastinating and force myself to sit down and actually work, I find it not only enjoyable but quite productive.” She encourages audiences to come down to the comedy festival and see what all that hard work can yield – certainly more than you see on the telly. “An extra 58 minutes for a start,” Kitty agrees. “Plus you get to see that I have legs. A lot of people believe I am just a torso.”

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HEATH FRANKLIN’S CHOPPER THE (S)HITLIST

Once you become associated with a particular character or style of comedy it can be difficult to break away. Rather than go in a completely different direction, Heath Franklin has kicked complacency in the clackers with his latest creation The (s)Hitlist. While maintaining the lovable persona and larrikin humour that people have grown to love, the show is very much a fusion of Chopper and Franklin’s own personal views. The biggest difference is the fact that The (s)Hitlist is an interactive show, incorporating suggestions from the audience throughout the night. After road-testing the show for a month in New Zealand, Franklin is now eagerly awaiting his chance to bring it to Melbourne audiences. “You first do a show trying to get used to how it goes and after a while you get rid of all the deadwood and it really hums along. So I’m looking forward to doing it for an Australian crowd,” he says from the Chopper estate, as he tries to calm his kids down. Having been somewhat disconnected from the comedy world for the past couple of years, Franklin is happy to get back in the mix. “You can sit in your little dark room and write shows all you want, but it’s nice to kind of know what the climate is, what the tone of shows is and who’s innovating. If you see a really great comic you say ‘I’m gonna pull my socks up’ and really try and take it to the next gear.” Observing that much of his comedy came from Chopper “complaining about things,” Franklin decided to take the idea to the next level, and thus, The (s)Hitlist was born. The material, he says, ranges from “trivial” concerns to issues that are more universal. “On tour you’re doing shows in small towns late at night and there’s not always somewhere good open to eat, so you pull over at Maccas and force some of it down and think ‘I fucking hate this but here I am again.’ So Maccas is going on the shitlist.” As he continued to note more and more gripes the list progressively got larger, eventually becoming show-worthy. Just as he is hoping for the show to be an outlet for audiences, Franklin himself has felt the cathartic benefits of having all the things that irk him in one place. “There’s something strangely satisfying about making it official, like putting the dole on the list, ‘yeah that feels

JOSIE LONG

ROMANCE AND ADVENTURE Josie Long just turned 30 years old and to her it is a little alarming. Romance And Adventure is about freaking out about growing up and climbing a mountain and how much she bloody loved that. It’s also about social justice. There’s a bit in it where she pretends to be a sort of Godzilla for some reason and also a bit where she definitely comes across as a psychopath. If you like the sound of any of that then she’d be delighted if you came to see it.

AAMER RAHMAN

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THE TRUTH HURTS

good’. There’s something nice about organising your anger.” The more the Chopper character has developed the more the lines have been blurred between Franklin and his creation. Out of necessity and to keep himself interested, he has chosen to make things a little more open. “After seven or eight years there’s only so many Neville Bartos jokes you can tell before I get sick of it.” The best example of the character’s development will be seen in The (s)Hitlist. “In some ways it’s the most Choperry show but the least Choppery referencing show. Hopefully this is the most inclusive Chopper show, so you don’t have to have seen the film or anything else I’ve done or give a shit about me.” Having performed his share of international shows, Franklin has learned the importance of creating material that isn’t specifically niche. “You can have an esoteric joke that references Chopper and get a laugh out 10 per cent of the room or you can just whinge about something everyone knows about.” While the interactive element of the show has yielded “mixed” results so far, Franklin believes he’s got the format down pat. “Somebody wanted to put tiny horses on the shitlist and I absolutely disagree with that a million per cent. Tiny horses are one of the most beautiful pure forms of ridiculous entertainment on the planet.” One of his favourite audience submissions was from a lady in New Zealand, who ranted about elderly people and their prowess (or lack thereof) behind the steering wheel. “The one thing I learned pretty quickly when doing this show is that you can write some finely crafted punchlines, but chances are there’s gonna be some nutter in the audience that’ll be funnier than any of that.”

BY ANDREW ‘HAZARD’ HICKEY Venue: The Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 30 - 31 Times : 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm) Tickets: Full $35.90, Conc. $32, Group $30

Highlighting political and racial inequalities within Australia through sharp wit and insightful humour, one half of award-winning cult comedy duo Fear of a Brown Planet Aamer Rahman will perform his first ever solo show, The Truth Hurts. Rahman is the proverbial bull in a china shop, treading the most delicate themes - politics, racism, and the War on Terror. This is confronting, uncompromising political comedy at its best, and designed to hit hard. Born in Saudi Arabia, Aamer moved to Australia when he was six. At ten he moved to Oman, only to return here at 13, living in the eastern suburbs of Melbourne. It was during his younger years that he was first met with racism in Australia while at primary school. He says: “you’re too young to understand what it is, but you’re treated like an outsider.” It was through youth work events within the Muslim community that Aamer met close friend and FOBP partner Nazeem Hussain. Stumbling into comedy several years ago, Aamer entered the RAW Comedy competition. With a law degree, pursuing a career in comedy was not something he had ever previously entertained despite his avid interest in the comedy of Chris Rock, Bill Hicks and Margaret Cho. “Nazeem mentioned it [the competition],” he says, “We both did quite well. Nazeem made the state finals and I made national finals, five minutes of mucking around on stage turned into a full blown show.” Now an accomplished stand up comedian who has, since 2008, performed at the MICF, Sydney Comedy Festival, Adelaide Fringe, and the prestigious Edinburgh Fringe Festival, including a sold out tour of the UK in 2012. His TV credits include Network Ten’s 2010 Oxfam Comedy Gala, the Comedy Channel’s You Have Been Watching, and most recently, the upcoming ABC1 comedy quiz show Tractor Monkeys, and an episode of the top-rating Australian Story, which featured him together with his comedy partner Nazeem Hussain. Rahman was also a contributing writer for season one of the Australian series of UK TV show, Balls of Steel. Fear of a Brown Planet still exists, however Aamer wanted to try a different outlet. “Not everything makes it into a Brown Planet show,” he explains, “Some of this [The Truth Hurts] has been

BY TAMARA VOGL

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Portico Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $25, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20

ADAM HILLS

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HAPPYISM

Considered hot property in the UK after hosting the ground-breaking The Last Leg during last year’s Paralympics coverage on Channel 4 (watched by Prime Minister David Cameron snuggled up in bed with his wife), Adam Hills is back and live on stage with his first solo show in 3 years. He’s one of our greatest comedy exports and it is only a matter of time before we lose him to the world — so get in quick!

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Supper Room, 90 Swanston St, CBD Dates: April 9 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 8.15pm (Sunday 7.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday – Saturday $33, Full Wednesday – Thursday & Sunday $29.50, Conc, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $26

Venue: Princess Theatre, 163 Spring St, CBD Dates: April 11 – 21 (except Monday) Times: 7pm, (Sundays 8:45pm) Tickets: Full $49, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $45

MARGARET CHO

JACK DEE

Margaret Cho was born and raised in San Francisco, and from childhood, was exposed to the queer culture of the city. As a grown woman, she still grapples with questions of identity – as an individual, as a member of a community – and her new show draws directly on these thoughts. Entitled MOTHER it sees Cho grappling with the idea of parenthood as it relates to queer culture. “Essentially, the show is about the fact that I’m old enough to be somebody’s mother, but I act just like a terrible child,” Cho tells me with a laugh. “I’m getting more and more out of control the older I get. I’m regressing into childhood.” Behind the self-deprecating jokes, Cho is asking some tough questions of herself. The show represents an attempt to define an identity in a culture that, for the most part, keeps queer people out of sight. “When you grow up as a queer person, and you’re not getting married, or having kids, or doing the things that straight people do, how do you know what age you are?” she says. “How do you identify the milestones? There are no societal cues, there are no defined life goals as such, and there’s a weird feeling of invisibility that comes with that.” In many cases Cho says the families we create for ourselves are just as important as the ones we’re born into. “I think that queer people are really good at creating families wherever we can, wherever we find the possibility,” she says. “That’s something that’s happened in the past, and that continues. A big part of my show is about that. I was lucky in that my own mother was very progressive, and taught me all about gay people. In the queer community, parenting doesn’t always come from the traditional family structure – I think that, in the queer community, the older generation have a responsibility to act as parents to younger ones, even if that doesn’t mean traditional parenting.” Queer people have become more visible on TV in recent years, especially in shows like Modern Family, which presents a set of same-sex parents as a relatively mundane occurrence. Cho loves the show, and feels like its exploration of different kinds of families is a step in the

Jack Dee, the king of deadpan comedy, is back. After a six year break from stand-up, which was mostly spent frequenting hit UK TV shows such as QI, Have I Got News For You and sitcom Lead Balloon (which he co-wrote and starred in), Dee is bringing his hilariously grumpy guise and unimpressed life-outlook back to where it was hatched – the stage. However, he says that even though his show is billed as him “agonising over the slightest of annoyances and misdemeanours”, this isn’t how he sees it at all. “That’s the big misconception. Everybody thinks I’m there to complain, but I’m really not,” Dee explains,although his tone says otherwise. “I’m actually a huge optimist and I have a very high regard for life and what it will bring to me. But I am also made to be deeply disappointed. Every. Single. Day. It’s that point in which the comedy seems to grow. “I think it’s because I was born with unnaturally high standards. I wake up on a morning with very high expectations, but then I open up a packet of cornflakes and they spill all over the floor, and that’s the weekend ruined for me. I just can’t win.” So why after six years of TV success, which is surely enough to turn even the droopiest of frowns upside down, did you decide to once again hit the road, Jack? “I wanted to spend less time with my family,” he remarks, dry as a bone. “My kids are old enough now to accept the truth of that. I like to do my own thing and they can live their lives content without me and I can do without them, so it’s cool.” Now, a happily settled family man, Dee says that it’s mostly his home life that he draws on for his set’s material. “The show is kind of a rolling review of my life as it changes and as I go along living it. It’s really all about being a father, a son and having teenage kids. Oh, and I also talk about my views on philosophy, religion, conspiracy theories and consumer rights. There might even be some music thrown in if the audience is appreciative enough for my liking.” He adds that he’s excited, a word you mightn’t expect to hear him utter, at the prospect of seeing how the show will transfer across to an Australian audience.

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around for years and some will be based on the news tomorrow.” His forceful use of politics has earned Aamer comparisons to Civil Rights leader Malcolm X. “It’s obviously flattering,” he laughs, “But at the end of the day I’m a comedian. You can’t expect more than comedy. Most people know that.” The polemic nature of his comedy has come under fire resulting in labels of ‘un-Australian’ being blasted his way. When asked if he believes he is ‘un-Australian’ Aamer replies: “if being Australian means calling people un-Australian because they call people racist. Who gets to define that? It doesn’t bother me.” With a hard political line comes controversy, and apparently controversy coupled with immigrant experience and a strong opinion on Australian racism is a good justification for death threats. “Through YouTube and Facebook you can find a lot of general racist hate,” Aamer explains. “I get death threats every now and then. Things like, ‘next time you’re onstage I’ll shoot you.’ You can’t take it seriously though.” Looking forward to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, Aamer notes that he loves hanging out with people after the show. “It’s really fun to be on stage,” he says. “But I always hang out after the show. The audience is so mixed, I really enjoy seeing who has come out. We are not a mainstream act, so our fan base really supports us and follows us really closely.”

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right direction, even if we haven’t gone quite far enough just yet. “I think from here, it would be great to see more bisexuality on TV, or to see more transgender people. “A big part of my show is me attempting to rectify those things. I always try to speak to that queer identity, to that idea that we can all feel kind of isolated or invisible wherever we are.” Cho has worked extensively in TV, but one of her most memorable roles saw her crossing gender lines to play Kim Jong Il on 30 Rock. “I’m very familiar with his look,” she says, “but you can’t find any audio of him speaking. People don’t know what he sounds like, so I had to come up with my own version of that from scratch.” Getting the look right, however, was a breeze. “Oh my god, it took no time at all,” she laughs. “I could come in and I’d be ready to go within five minutes. It’s funny, it takes way more effort for me to look like Margaret Cho in the morning than it does for me to look like Kim Jong Il!” BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: RMIT Capitol Theatre, 113 Swanston St, CBD Dates: April 16 –21 Times: 9pm (Sunday 8pm) Tickets: $54.90

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“When I’ve toured Australia in the past, the impression I came away with is that there’s a more practical sensibility about the country’s outlook,” Dee recalls. “I think you’re more connected with the outdoors, and you have a more hands-on way of life. I’m not saying that everyone knows how to shear a sheep or anything, but there’s a closer connection with, say, a source of food and where it comes from. “You don’t really get that in Britain, nobody understands the first bloody thing about what a carrot is or where chickens come from.” Jack also notes that his brief hiatus from stand-up has made him miss the immediacy of the art form, something that is somewhat lost with TV work. “When you write stuff for TV, you have to wait a while until you realise whether it has worked or not. One of the joys of stand-up is that if you think of something on the way to a gig, try it out on the audience right away and see how it goes. “After a few years away from the stage, I had a whole load of stuff built up that I was wanted to get out there and try out,” Dee says. “It meant that there was actually a real sense of relief when I got back onto the stage. I’ve really been enjoying it.” Just don’t expect his enjoyment to show when you see him live. BY CALLUM FITZPATRICK

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Main Hall, Cnr. Swanston and Collins Streets, CBD Dates: April 18 – 20 Time: 9.15pm Tickets: $46.90


TOM GLEESON HELLO BITCHES!

Tom Gleeson wants to manage your expectations. As an elder statesman of the Aussie stand-up circuit, he knows that comedians usually write the synopsis for their comedy festival show before they’ve actually written the show. Whether or not the synopsis has anything to do with the show is irrelevant, right? Not to Tom. He doesn’t like to mislead people, so he didn’t make stuff up. His page on the comedy festival website has two lines on it, which basically say, ‘Buy a ticket, Tom Gleeson is funny.’ He called his show Hello Bitches! because he knew that was how the show would start. “It’s better than ‘good evening’, isn’t it?” he laughs. The show has now been written, even performed a few times at the Adelaide Fringe, and Tom is more than happy to describe it. “At the moment it’s about iPhones, sex and religion,” he says. “It’s funny.” The Adelaide critics have been extremely positive and Tom has sold out most nights at the Fringe, but for an Australian TV and radio regular this is hardly surprising. His best sign that things are going well came from his harshest critic. “My wife said it’s the best show I’ve ever done. Last year I thought

ADAM ROZENBACHS EURODAD

the show was pretty good and she said, ‘Nah, not as good as the last one.’ She’s prone to telling the truth. Sam Simmons’ girlfriend also said it was one of the best shows she’s ever seen. A theme is emerging here – I really value the opinion of partners of comedians because they see a lot of shows and they don’t suffer fools.” Tom’s wife is also very close to the content, because the show focuses on their one-year-old daughter. More specifically, it is about how Tom is feeling about being a new parent and an atheist. “I was raised as a Catholic and I’m not one anymore. A large portion of the show is about when you think nothing, how do you teach someone else to think nothing,” he says. “I’m really enjoying it, because I’ve learned something about myself now. Leading up to the show, I kept on feeling a bit tense. I’d say to my wife, ‘I don’t know about this, you know’, because my views about religion are pretty uncompromising. I felt like some people would get offended and walk out and I was all concerned about it because I don’t aim to offend, I want people to laugh a lot. That’s usually what I aim to do, make people laugh from deep down inside because I’m talking about something that’s actually interesting or that actually affects your life. “What I’ve learned is that I’ve got heaps of hang ups about religion and the audience doesn’t. I’ve learned that I have all these feelings, like a typical ex-Catholic, where I don’t believe in God but I feel guilty about it. But it’s been good, because there’s a real healthy cynicism in the audience that I didn’t know was there. I learned that going to mass every Sunday as a kid means that I’m

in the minority.” The other thing that Gleeson has learned is that he’s behind the eight ball when it comes to being a parent. “I’m 38 and I just became a father. Most people that go to comedy shows had kids ages ago. This is something that they’ve been dealing with while I’m been walking around like this perpetual teenager, like other comedians, pretending that kids don’t exist. “A lot of other comedians I know were like, ‘You’re not going to become one of those comedians who talks about being a parent are you?’ Well no, what do you think, I’m going to create a child from scratch, look at it and think, ‘There’s nothing in this.’ Are you a fucking idiot? I’ll just go home and make up some more stuff about Facebook, shall I? No. Becoming a parent results in introspection! Of course it’s in the show.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Supper Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 Times: Monday 8.15pm, Tuesday - Saturday 9.45pm, Sunday 8.45pm Tickets: Full Saturday $35, Full Wednesday - Friday & Sunday - Monday $28, Conc., Group and Laugh Pack $26 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $24

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Adam Rozenbachs clearly loves his dad, but that doesn’t mean he likes him. When Rozenbachs Junior and Senior set off for a father-son trip to Europe last year, Adam’s love and loving dislike wrestled for domination. In his latest show, Eurodad, the 774 broadcaster and former Cleo Bachelor of the Year nominee recounts with regret, bemusement and disbelief just how bad it can get when you pack your bags and go travelling with a parent. You have to wonder what possessed him to try it. “Mainly stupidity, with equal parts masochism and insanity,” Adam says. “As painful as I knew it was going to be I thought it’d be a nice thing to do. I genuinely wanted to repay him for everything he did for me growing up, because the most I’d ever really done for him was get him a slab of Fosters Light Ice, which I found in the hard rubbish.” Adam’s dad is the original Australian tough guy. In a word: stubborn. He’s a man to get the job done without making a big fuss. A man who deals with a broken ankle by wearing a thicker sock, his son says. “I’m pretty sure my dad has never worn sunscreen in his life,” Adam laughs. “His motto is ‘slip, slop, slap that on me and you’ll regret it, pal’.” No doubt about it, Adam knew what lay ahead when he booked himself in for the two-man road trip across France and Germany. But he thought romantically about building memories with his father that would last the rest of their lives. He also thought pragmatically about future stand-up material. “I know what he’s like, so adding Europe into the mix was always going to have some humour in it for me. However, the ratio wasn’t great – three weeks travel for a one hour show is like felling a forest for a toothpick. But man, what a toothpick! Once the trip had begun I wrote down everything that happened – one, because of the sheer volume of ridiculous things he said and did and two, so I’d know they happened and weren’t figments of my imagination. Seriously, when travelling through Europe, who asks, ‘What night is bin night?’” What Adam didn’t count on was how hard it would be to keep his father entertained. “I hoped he might embrace a few things outside of his comfort zone, or areas of interest, but he didn’t – he wasn’t into museums, or galleries, or fun, which makes it pretty hard to think of activities to do. It takes all of about point eight of a second to see the Eiffel Tower, and then I had to try think of something else for us to do. And when you take out galleries and museums, it leaves you with just staring at the sky for six hours,” Adam says. “The one thing I did foresee was him driving me insane every waking minute, and he nailed that.” In the show, Adam describes his dad’s penchant for reading road signs – as in, every sign they passed on the Autobahn on the six-hour drive from Munich to Berlin. He also enjoyed counting all the steps he climbed in Europe, which drove his son bonkers. What Adam really learned on the trip was a healthy respect for his mum. “The trip made me realise my dad is one of those people that doesn’t think they exist if they’re not making noise. So he was just a running commentary the entire time: ‘Tram.’ ‘Police.’ ‘McDonald’s.’ It got to the point where I wondered if you can get late adult onset autism. I emailed mum at one point and simply said, ‘You have the patience of a saint.’ They’ve been married 45 years. I’d have bumped him off after about two…months.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Regent Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Time: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $24, Conc. $22, Tightarse Tuesday $21, Group and Preview $18

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THE AGE

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“WHAT NIGHT IS BIN NIGHT?” DAD IN MUNICH

ADAM ROZENBACHS

EURO

DAD

ONE SON. ONE DAD. THREE WEEKS IN HELL.

MELBOURNE TOWN HALL 8.30PM, MARCH 28 - APRIL 21 PREVIEWS: MARCH 28-31

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SIMON KECK

strength to strength. Yes there are awards and accolades on his C.V. but more importantly he’s here, he’s breathing (and farting), and he’s doing what he loves. “It’s this simple — if you don’t like what you do, quit. I know so many people who constantly complain about their job, which is fine for a while, but you need to understand what you hate and why you hate it, and once you figure it out, do something. If you wake up and you feel like crying because the idea of doing the same thing every day is so monotonous, you shouldn’t be doing that job.” Surely working in television and radio have their own issues though? “It’s like any job. Some days are fun and other days you regret not hitting snooze more. Most jobs are like a long-term relationship, you start out all excited and then after a year of it you’re like, ‘Oh, missionary again, you sure you don’t want to try something more risky?’ ‘Nope’. ‘Can I at least leave the light on?’ ‘Fine then.’ *click*. Having said that, daytime television is the worst. I’m pretty sure it’s the only reason our unemployment rate isn’t higher.” Depression and mental illness are invisible disabilities, things that Australians think people should just get over because that’s what you have to do apparently. Being a man with a mental illness in this country is even harder and intolerance runs deep. You hardly see people telling someone with diabetes or epilepsy to just get on with it, and while there are campaigns everywhere raising

NOB HAPPY SOCK

Simon Keck attempted suicide, and failed. Really, that is the best thing you can ever fail at given the fact the reward for dying isn’t all that great. Comedy may be the teaspoon of sugar that helps the medicine of life go down, sweetening the sour so that the audience can handle what’s being presented to them and the performer can handle what they’ve lived, but Simon Keck’s Nob Happy Sock is layering arsenic with molasses. It’s confronting, but he does it well. “The moment after you are in a near-death experience, the most common reaction is to laugh,” Keck says. “We instinctively do that to release tension. That’s what a lot of good comedy is, creating tension and then releasing it. Having said that, farts are the international language of humour so if you nearly die from a fart, you might just have the greatest comedic moment ever.” After moving to Melbourne, Keck pursued a patchwork career of stand-up, writing for television, and also radio. He was doing OK when things came to a grinding halt in 2008, then he spiralled into the depths of emotional hell, and on his way back his work as a comedian and comedy writer has gone from

awareness of mental illness, you still can’t talk about it. “Australians love raising awareness,” he says. “I don’t think there’s a person out there who has never heard of this cancer thing the youth are talking about these days. Everyone is aware of it. Just like everyone knows about suicide and depression. We just don’t ever like to talk about bad things, because that derails the illusion that everything is peachy. Depression is the fart in the elevator everyone politely pretends not to notice. It’s like your grandparents having sex. Everyone acknowledges that it obviously happens, but you never bring it up in public. If you do, people will look at you like you just farted in an elevator. I don’t really know if we need to raise more awareness, but I think it’s good to have a show that humanises depression. Something relatable and intimate, where it’s not just the statistics everyone wheels out about 1 million adult Australians currently suffering from depression. As soon as I see a graph I just switch off, I think a lot of people do.” Comedy has been both a rewarding and extremely difficult road for Keck and it begs the question: “why comedy?” “Because one day I’ll be dead, and I don’t think anyone wants to look back at their life and think, ‘Man I sure nailed the shit out of my in-tray in a timely and punctual manner!’” BY KRISSI WEISS

Stoo-Puh-Fak-Shun presents Venue: Upstairs Lounge @ Hairy Little Sista, 240 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (Except Mondays) Time: 10:30pm Tickets: Full $21, Group and Conc. $16, Tightarse Tuesday $14

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Directed by Rebecca De Unamuno Tickets can be purchased via the Comedy Festival website, www.trybooking.com or at the door 9:30pm at Word Warehouse, 14 Goldie Place, Melbourne. Ph (03) 9606 0611

Find Jared Jekyll on facebook 28

SHAKING HANDS WITH DANGER

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Venue: The Portland Hotel - The Locker Room, Cnr Russell & Lt Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Time: 6pm (Sundays 5pm) Tickets: Full $15, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack and Tightarse Tuesday $10

DAVID QUIRK

The lovechild of shambolic showmanship and badass beatboxing.

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David Quirk’s new comedy festival show, Shaking Hands with Danger, is about the titanic ramifications of bad decisions, a kind of personal exposé riddled with sharp observational humour. It has been described as a tour through some of life’s sadder suburbs; a reflective journey through “rock fandom, health posters and those moments when we all occasionally let ourselves down.” It’s not really a stand-up show, it’s a storytelling show. And regardless of what you may read on the festival website, it is not about push rings, iPhones or babies. “Sadly none of those bits made the final cut in this new show,” he smiles. “The more it got written the less it seemed to need jokes and stories about push rings and iPhones. It’s really about twisted accounts of mistakes I’ve made and being on a plane with Slash.” (A push ring, incidentally, is a ring or a present given to a new mother for “pushing” her kid out and not having a Caesarean, a recent American trend to which David is firmly opposed. It doesn’t matter since, as mentioned, it is no longer in the show, but it is interesting.) What remains of David’s initial synopsis is the theme of infidelity. “If you’ve read this far,” he writes, “you’ve either cheated, thought about cheating or been cheated on.” It’s the opening line, so presumably we’ve all “read this far”. So presumably, we’ve all had a brush with infidelity. “I just believe it’s true,” David says, “I think most people have at least had thoughts about being with another person. If you haven’t, then god bless you.” In Shaking Hands with Danger, what begins as a string of seemingly random anecdotes about Guns N’ Roses’ lead guitarist ends in a story of David’s own experience with infidelity. The creative process began two and a half years ago, when David “made a mistake” and he could only bring himself to write about it once he had been “granted permission”. In layman’s terms, David cheated on his girlfriend — the woman he thought he was going to spend the rest of his life with — and he needed her ok before he turned the experience into light entertainment. “I once read that it’s better to ask forgiveness than permission. And that’s nice, but for this I needed both,” he says. The result is a love story “gone wrong and told right”. Critics in Adelaide who have seen the performance have lauded David’s honesty and warmth, describing the show as ‘deeply personal ‘ and ‘highly satisfying’. It’s funny, they’ve said, but “more in the style of Daniel Kitson than Jimmy Carr.” This is a change of pace for a comic that has made his name with acerbic, often political stand-up. “People tell me they like it because it’s a story and I never thought I’d do a show that was so heavily storied but I think it was the only way I could tell this particular one,” David explains. “If it’s not a story, it’s an hour-long joke.” Whatever else it is, Shaking Hands with Danger is the result of some serious soul-searching. Ask David how his life has changed over the last year and he is consumed with thoughts of what he did and what it means. “Personally, I’ve gone on a ‘tuff’ journey making this new show. I feel it’s important to spell tough like that — t-u-f-f. I’ve even had to ask myself how I’ve changed, so that as a character in my own show it makes sense at the end. The only thing I’ve noticed is that I’m no better off now. That’s not a change, but it’s something I’ve noticed,” he says. “And I wear a denim jacket now.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Backstage Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $26.90, Full Wednesday Thursday & Sunday $24, Conc. (N/A Friday & Saturday), Group and Laugh Pack $20, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $18


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LATE NIGHT THEATRESPORTS BULMERS BEST OF THE EDINBURGH FEST

The Best of the Edinburgh Fest has been an iconic staple of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival for years. Amateur detectives should have noticed from its title that the show is selection of the best performers from the Edinburgh Festival, and therefore provides a blue-chip solution to those unsure of whom to see at MICF. “There’s three of us, all from the UK. As a show, as a whole, it just works brilliantly,” says host Jimmy McGhie. “You’ve got three different, interesting comics…we all push each other to be better each night. “It’s been really good fun [touring the show in other cities]. Aussie audiences are really good to play to. I’m hosting, that’s probably because my style of comedy is quite chatty and improvisational, so I can get up and warm the crowd up. The first guy up is Stuart Goldsmith, and he’s a really good guy, and we’re kind of similar. And then Carl Donnelly at the end is more of a whimsical, storyteller, your funny-mate-at-the-pub kind of guy. He’s got some really amazing stuff, and we all sort of complement each other.” Beyond offering three different comic styles, the show’s format actually provides another reason why the Best of the Edinburgh Fest is widely considered a safe-bet each year. “Because it’s a package show, we’re just doing our best stuff basically. My favourite bit of the show is obviously watching the other boys, but in terms of material, you change it a bit, but it’s your best stuff. I’ve got a joke about Shane Warne that I did last year that always gets around of applause,” he laughs, “so I tend to drop that in.” McGhie has an impressive amount of stand-up experience considering his age, and considering his improvisational, audience-participation style, I wondered if he had any good heckle stories for me.

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“Well, actually, there’s a legendary story which I think belongs to British comedian Frankie Boyle, where someone walked into a pub and [Boyle] was onstage doing a gig, and they just went, ‘Ugh there used to be a pool table in here’ and turned around and walked out again, which is just the harshest thing you could ever say to someone. It’s not even a heckle! It’s just, ‘Oh wow we wasted the pool room on a comedy night’. That’s quite legendary.” There is, however, another danger to McGhie’s conversational style. “I got into a slightly sticky situation last year when this guy was wearing sunglasses and I paid him out, basically saying, ‘Oh did you have a heavy night, trying to hide the damage of last night’s drinking?’ and it didn’t really go very well, and everyone around him – you could feel some slight awkwardness. And then at the break, he stood up, and someone helped him walk to the bar and I realised he was blind. He found it hilarious, he said he never laughed so much because he could see I was struggling to work out what was going on. Well he couldn’t see it, but he could feel it, and he didn’t want to say anything because he thought it would be funny to see how long I could keep going on about him having morning red-eye.” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: RMIT Capitol Theatre, 113 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15pm (Sundays 6.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $33, Conc. Friday Saturday $30, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $28, Conc. Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday, Group, Laugh Pack, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $26

Impro Melbourne have been treading the boards of the MICF for 20 years. Their quick-witted and gracious approach to success (and failure) in the improv world has earned them a dedicated legion of fans that continues to grow. Sarah Kinsella is directing this year’s show and decided to take the troupe back to basics with Late Night Theatresports. “We’re the longest running show in the festival; we’ve been in the cloakroom for most of that time although they do move us around,” Kinsella says. “When I was asked to be the director I said, ‘OK what in the past 20 years have we really enjoyed doing?’ It turned out that we like taking risks and we like doing things that involves exploring different things. I mean, the idea of theatre sports is that they’re short games where you compete with your colleagues on stage and the audience can actually see you sweating and working really hard – [this] is what we love. I thought, ‘Why don’t we play theatre sports?’ We own the license, it’s what we love to do and late at night at 11pm there won’t be any kids, there won’t be any families, so we don’t have to worry about being so censored. When we did improv in the beginning the whole idea was to get up and play – the festival guests would come and we would just jam. So this is going to be play for us.” If your only experience at theatresports is the tired and rehashed games from school then fear not – it’s actually a damn hilarious adventure to be a part of and the audience always plays a part in how the night will turn out. Kinsella explains that even the choice of games (of which there are far more than just Space Jump and Death In A Minute) is a last minute decision. “Oh I don’t know what we’ll do,” she says. “With theatre sports, there are literally hundreds of games you can play. So on the night we’ll do everything on the fly, right then. Before the show, we’ll look at who we’re playing with and decide with that. There might be someone who’s really good at voices and characters or someone who is really good at Shakespeare and we’ll do Shakespeare Flip, where you do Shakespeare but you talk like bogans. It’s about crafting the show with who you’ve got and also with the audience – if they respond to something really well you might continue to steer it down that road.” Sometimes, the worst thing that can happen when you’re sitting in the audience of a comedy show is watching the performer die on stage. You can feel their anxiety, you can

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hear fellow audience members shuffling uncomfortably in their seat and you start to feel the performer’s pain. With improv, and theatresports specifically, watching someone crash and burn is often half the fun. Their speeding down the hill of comedy with no brakes and the crash is the climax of the performance. “That’s exactly right,” she agrees. “When I teach improv with Impro Melbourne I try to explain that. I’ve got a brother who literally still thinks we plan what we do and I’ll say, ‘Well no, why would we do it at all?’ The thing is, if it fails the key is you have to be good-natured about it. I know if I see a play or comedy and someone’s dying on stage and they feel upset or nervous, in the audience you start to feel sick. It’s the same with improv, you have to die and go ‘Ta da.’ It’s like the Olympics, when I’m watching the girls in gymnastics, well I don’t want them to hurt themselves, but I know I watch it for the mistakes. I want them to do a spectacular fall but I want them to get up and throw their hands in the air and go ‘I’m gonna do that again.’” BY KRISSI WEISS

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Regent Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, Melbourne Dates: March 28 – April 13 (Thursdays - Saturday) Time: 11pm Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $20, Full Thursday, Conc. Friday - Saturday $15, Conc. Thursday, Group and Preview $10



CRAIG HILL

RHYS NICHOLSON

JOCK’S TRAP

“That’s practically stalking!” exclaims Craig Hill after I tell him that last year I somehow managed to see him twice in one month on opposite sides of the globe. That was when he was touring Blown By A Fan around the world, including last year’s Melbourne International Comedy Festival where I saw the show for the second time after witnessing the comedy whirlwind which is Craig Hill for the first time in his native Scotland. Hill was born to be on stage, and if it’s anywhere near as hilarious as last year’s show, this year’s Jock’s Trap will be one of the highlights of the festival. “The secret of my comedy is that I become who the audience are,” states Hill. “I had someone come up to me and say, ‘I love your characters’ and I said ‘I don’t have any characters’. They said, ‘Yes you do, it’s your face, you just become all these different people’. That’s the actor in me, I don’t even realise.” Hill has an electric stage presence, and flits from thought to thought, joke to joke in a seemingly never-ending cascade of laughs. “A lot of my comedy is me making it up on the spot,” he says. “The comedians I like are those like Ross Noble and Jason Byrne, I’ve always admired their energy and their ability to trust themselves. The things I make up on the moment seem to get the hugest reactions from the audience. They’re excited – it’s wild, it’s unhinged and from my point of view that’s really stimulating. “It makes every gig really interesting, it’s a real challenge for you as a comedian to think on your feet and create comedy on the go. What I do is I always have my show up my sleeve so when it’s a quiet night I can make the show a little bit gentler and do more material. As long as you’ve got the stories you want to tell and a rough idea you can just go with what you find in the audience first and foremost. It makes the shows much more fun for me as well. I end up laughing as much as the audience.” A great deal of the humour in Hill’s shows is generated from these on-the-spot interactions, with yet more having their origins in previous shows. “Comedy is always about your life as a comedian and of course your life as a comedian is on the road, touring and doing shows,” says Hill. “The most outrageous part of your day or what made you laugh often happens at your show. Somebody announces they’re bisexual in the middle of your show and the whole audience gasps like Australians didn’t know that was allowed. Whatever makes me laugh like that I’ll share with my audience. “I record my impressions of every show on my website and my Facebook page. Some of them are just fantastic, I love to remember them. I look back and I go, ‘Oh right, that was the night that that guy punched me there and I said, “Don’t do that because in the gay world that’s an invite”’. I’ll just remember funny things that occurred to me at the time.” An extremely hard worker onstage (you try literally running from

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TICKET S SHO TO THIS BEAT.CW AT OM.AU one side of the stage to the other under hot lights while singing, dancing and verbally jousting with an audience for an hour nonstop), Hill also holds himself to account off-stage while touring. “I don’t tolerate from myself anything less than 100 per cent,” he asserts. “It’s because I want to think on my feet and in order to do that I have to be as sharp as I possibly can. When I’m working I tend not to stay up too late, I think it’s the Scottish work ethic. I think, ‘This is the only night they get to see this, you can’t tell them you should have come on Tuesday when it was really funny’. Every night really matters. It’s a terrible responsibility and if people have paid to see your show I don’t care how tired you are.” If you do get along to see Jock’s Trap, and you really should – you’ll be thanked and farewelled personally by Hill upon exiting the theatre. He likes to do this to make sure his audience don’t take his acerbic, tongue-in-cheek personality onstage too seriously. “I’m really quite a normal person, I promise,” says Hill. “It started a few years back after a show in Edinburgh that was just so much fun. I just wanted to say thank you to them all for coming and for such a great night.” This genuine affection for and dedication to his fans is yet another of Hill’s endearing characteristics, one you’ll experience first-hand at Jock’s Trap. BY JOSH FERGEUS

Venue: The Famous Spiegeltent, 100 St Kilda Rd, CBD Dates: April 16 – 21 Times: 8.45pm (Sunday 7.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $39, Full Tuesday Thursday & Sunday $35, Preview $25

From success at Class Clowns when he was in high school in Newcastle to 2012 Time Out Awards Best Newcomer at the Sydney Comedy Festival, a web series, film appearance and two series on the Comedy Channel, Rhys Nicholson has grabbed the comedy world by the hair and demanded it pay attention. He’s young, queer and escaping the shackles of growing up in the steel city and determined to make his comedy more than just a novelty act. From aspiring actor to stand-up stalwart, Nicholson is a part of the new wave of comedy where the minority has become the majority and comedians are searching for more than just shock value and grandiose gags for a laugh. Humour is far more subtle at the moment – almost incidental – and acts as even more of a platform for tragedy than it ever has. There’s a lot less “boomtish” at the end of a joke these days. Nicholson has wound up his show in Brisbane, where it enjoyed its first run and gave him time to “iron out the kinks”, and he’s looking forward to bringing it to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. “Some of the material that I do, well, it’s kind of hard to work out what is a funny story and what is a fucking horrific thing that has happened to me,” Nicholson says. “You can easily turn something horrific into comedy but occasionally you’ll tell a story and expect a laugh because your friends or boyfriend have laughed at it and you’re met with faces saying, ‘Ooooh yeah, you see we’re not as dark as everyone around you is’.” That is one of the great challenges of comedy – what is an injoke and what will be understood by the masses? How much of a backstory do the audience need in order to enjoy this joke? “I guess it’s mostly about context,” he says. “You can’t just walk out and open up the show with an abortion joke. A comedian friend explained it the best way – when you do a spot at a club, you don’t really need context; you’re going out there trying to get laughs as quickly as possible. With a show it’s like Christmas time, it’s a comedian’s holiday where you get to do something a little bit special and you can be a little bit more in-jokey. You spend the first ten minutes of the show introducing yourself and then the middle section, plowing them with you and then the last 20 minutes saying sorry.” While the ‘80s and ‘90s were awash with middle-class, middleaged male comedians with the odd female for good measure (who, of course, had to reference vaginas at least seven times in a spot), the perceived minorities of society are now the majority. Comedy is represented by a massive spectrum of age, gender,

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race, sexuality and every other label out there, and that is seriously refreshing but that now means that artists must move beyond archaic shock tactics and stereotypes in order to get a good laugh – unless you’re Joan Rivers. “We even make jokes at The Comedy Store if there’s like, two gay comedians and three female comedians, we’re like, ‘Well what the fuck have they done here? This is gonna be an awful show’,” he says laughing. “There used to be this whole idea that women aren’t funny and that’s just not true and people know that now. All my inspirations in comedy are women – Sarah Silverman, Tina Fey – there are so many strong, power players in Hollywood comedy now that are gay or women so you don’t have to be a fucking novelty act.” Nicholson admits that there is a lot resting on his shows at MICF but given his success so far, that surely won’t be an issue. “After Melbourne and Sydney, I dunno what I’m doing,” he says. “You do a lot of like, auditions, for the overseas festivals while you’re in Melbourne. Your plans are all reliant on this one terrifying month. It can almost dictate the rest of your year and, well, life.” BY KRISSI WEISS

Venue: Portland Hotel – Gold Room, Cnr Russell & Lt Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $22, Full Tuesday - Thursday & Sunday $18, Conc. Friday - Saturday $18, Conc. Tuesday - Thursday, Sunday and Preview $15


TREVOR NOAH THE RACIST

Trevor Noah will change the way you eat. The way you eat tacos, anyway. He’s perhaps South Africa’s finest stand up comic...that’s what the Americans are saying, anyway. But given Australia’s long history of copying everything the Americans do, I’m going to go ahead and agree with them. One thing’s for sure, when Trevor Noah takes the stage you’re reminded that life is only as dull as you make it. His show, The Racist, stands as a testament to the idea that, if you pay attention, the world is actually pretty hilarious. “Basically my show is just about funny things that have happened to people around me in the last two years. Most of the time I’m just telling audiences stuff that I’ve seen. Every single story is based on a true event. Depending on the story, I embellish in order to get it into comedy. But almost 100 per cent of what I talk about is true. It’s like Hollywood, sometimes you need a bit of razzle-dazzle to make it into a blockbuster.” What Noah means to say is that his show is like the Die Hard franchise before Bruce Willis lost his hair and started forgetting things; it’s over-the-top, it’s on point, and it isn’t going to need a

hip replacement. Noah’s Hollywood reference hardly surprises me, though. After all, he has just cracked the US market. Yet despite the high-fives he and Jay Leno have likely exchanged backstage Noah still manages to remain quite modest, evinced by his ability to undersell himself when I ask about his act. “My show is always changing, it’s never good enough. It’s always a work in progress. But I don’t have any bad jokes.” Ok, so it wasn’t a complete undersell. The truth is that while on the surface, The Racist does appear quite silly (the good kind of silly, mind you), Noah’s act is actually a well-planned social study, one which quietly celebrates our similarities while laughing wildly at our differences. It’s a show that’s heavily informed by his childhood growing up in postApartheid South Africa, a background most likely responsible for his fascination with race. “Before Apartheid, race was more of a hatred issue and a racism issue. Now South Africa deals with race as an issue. But race is something that won’t go away...everywhere in the world, it’s not going anywhere.” Noah’s subject matter means it’s only natural that his own race continues to be brought up by the media. Flicking through past interviews and press releases that bear the “Trevor Noah” headline, it’s hard to find one that doesn’t mention his being born to a white Swiss father and a black South African mother. Yet there’s nothing incredible there. No, what makes

his childhood remarkable is that, in the era of Apartheid, his parents’ relationship was illegal, and the racial pecking order of South Africa had fermented to a point that his own maternal grandmother referred to him as ‘master’. Then again, maybe she just had a sense of humour. Maybe it’s the grandmother that taught Noah that Mexican accent. “Race is easily one of the biggest issues in the world, no matter where you are, no matter who you are. A lot of people try and act like race doesn’t matter to them or doesn’t affect them but, in one way or another, it does! It’s one of the most basic things that we base ourselves on, and a lot of things happen because of it. I guess coming from a country like South Africa it’s something I pick up on...there, race is something that’s in your face all the time. It’s something that I’ve grown up with.” After all this talk about race, it’s comforting to know that Trevor Noah doesn’t actually care what colour your skin is. For that matter, he doesn’t even care where you live. “Look, it doesn’t matter where I am in the world. It doesn’t matter what country I’m in. It’s not about the country. It’s not about where people are from. I’ll perform anywhere.” Well, unless you live in Adelaide. He’s not going there. BY JAMES PEARSON

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Venue: Trades Hall – New Ballroom, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.15pm (Sunday 7.15pm) Tickets: $33

FELICITY WARD

THE HEDGEHOG DILEMMA WIN

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Felicity Ward’s new show, entitled The Hedgehog Dilemma, is based around the predicament that the prickly little creature’s face in the colder months, well, the question is: do they curl up with each other to stay warm, at the risk of hurting themselves and others, or do they stay by themselves, avoiding pain, but possibly being cold and alone? “It’s an analogy for human intimacy about whether we get into relationships or not,” Ward explains. “The show sounds pretty deep, but if this balances it out, there’s a giant slide of a science penis in the first five minutes.” As a comedian, it’s necessary to be an observer, and Ward tells me that she is keenly aware of this fact, fearing that every joke could possibly be her last. “I always keep my eyes peeled and my ears perked,” she tells me. “It’s a desperate show in a comedian’s brain. My joke writer is like some sweaty, dehydrated, sinewy, underweight pencil pusher in the backroom with a typewriter and a hopeful stare, saying, ‘What about the way you’re pouring your cereal? Could we do something with that? Could you make a joke about that?’ I feel sorry for my brain.” Like many young Aussies seeking fame and fortune, Ward has recently decamped to Los Angeles. I ask her what it’s like being based there, and if she’s found many career opportunities thus far, although she tells me that ‘based’ may be too strong a word for her situation. “If renting a crack den for a month constitutes being ‘based’ in LA, these days, then yes, that’s what I’m doing,” she says wearily. Her apartment is a particular source of anxiety – in fact, Ward has pondered the possibility that it may have actually been decorated by extra-terrestrials. “There’s a giant, inexplicable painting of a wooden duck, with disproportionately long legs,” she tells me of her current pad. “None of the chairs around the table are comfortable to sit on longer than eight seconds. You can’t sit on the fold-out couch because the hinges don’t work, and you just start drifting into a lying down position.” The horrors of apartment life aside, Ward assures me that she’s having a grand old time in LA. She’s doing as many gigs as possible, auditioning for sitcoms in the hope that one might see the light of day…and hanging out at Medieval Times. “I cheer on jousting men on horseback and eat meat with my hands,” she says. “Adolescent dream: tick!” While she loves her audience dearly, Ward acknowledges that her shows sometimes attract a bizarre crowd. “I had a lady give me a hand-sewn Ginger Bread Man stuffed toy once,” she says, “and she then proceeded to tell me how her Facebook page was being sued by a man in America because her Ginger Bread men don’t wear any pants. He was accusing her of being some kind of paedophile. How is that a real thing?” Ward’s upcoming MICF show will be recorded for a DVD special – a fact that she finds both exciting and terrifying in equal measure. “I’m absolutely packing it,” she says. “Editing is a beautiful thing, but you can’t Photoshop in an audience, right? So if you want to come, and bring 900 of your closest friends that’d be super appreciated. But quietly, yes, I am also very, very excited.”

Venue: Upstairs Lounge @ Hairy Little Sista, 240 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (Except Mondays) Time: 10:30pm Tickets: Full $21, Group and Conc. $16, Tightarse Tuesday $14

DAREBIN ARTS’ SPEAKEASY PRESENTS…

The alternative comedy home – not what you’re expecting as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival Featuring Sabrina D’Angelo / Zoe Coombs Marr / Fabian Lapham and the Actual Musicians / Telia Nevile / Sl*tmonster & Friends / Bron Batten / Tommy Bradson / Candy Bowers and Busty Beatz / The Listies

1 – 21 April 2013 Tickets darebinarts.com.au/speakeasy or call 9481 9500

BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Date: April 15 Time: 9pm Tickets: Full $32, Conc. $28, Group $26 , BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

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EDDIE IFFT

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TOO SOON?

The purpose of the interview is to gain insight into the interviewee, but sometimes, in exceptionally rare cases, the interviewer learns something intrinsic about themselves. Such is when I informed Pittsburgh-raised comedian Eddie Ifft that I was a diehard Oakland Raiders fan. “You know the reputation of their fans? They’re like the biggest fucking assholes that have ever lived! They’re criminals.” This made so much sense to me – I do j-walk quite a bit (only when it’s safe, guys). Eddie Ifft is talking from Adelaide, where he is performing his new show, Too Soon?, at their fringe festival. “It’s been amazing, the best year yet. We did in the Garden this year, in a circus tent, and the energy’s been amazing. There’s so many people around, the shows are selling out every night, the people just seem to be pumped and the more pumped the crowd is, the more I feed off of it, so it’s just been kinda crazy.” He seems to be enjoying himself. But what about all the freaks in Adelaide? “I like Adelaide a lot but I almost didn’t come back this year because I was at home and I rented a movie randomly, and it was Snowtown and I watched it and I was like, ‘That’s it, I’m not going back.’ The actors, when I was watching it, I was like, ‘Shit, all these guys are gonna win an Academy Award, this acting is brilliant’ and then I google it and none of them had been in any movies ever and I’m like, ‘Who are these people?’ They’re just playing themselves. They’re like, ‘oh yeah I raped my brother, I know what that’s like’, ‘I’ve murdered a person in my bathtub, I know exactly how to act like this.’” Unafraid to test the boundaries with his daring material, Ifft differs from society’s views on the appropriate time and place for humour. “I always make jokes probably a little too soon. The idea came from, I was at a funeral making jokes. And everyone was like, ‘really? You can’t even wait’. Anywhere I can get the laughs. I always say the reason I do comedy is that I wanna bring remedy to a shitty situation and so I’m at a funeral and everyone’s sad and I’m trying to stop them being sad.” A frequent performer here, I suggest to Ifft that technology has allowed Australia to absorb American culture more than ever before, and not even we can escape the toxicity of Bill ‘Fuck It, We’ll Do It Live’ O’Reilly. “I watch Bill O’Reilly kind of like I’m watching Jerry Springer or a fictional movie. Bill O’Reilly to me is just like, it’s a character. But the problem is the majority of America doesn’t think that, and then I have to then have conversations with these people so it’s a lot better coming here and not dealing with the guns and bible people. “You guys seem more trivial here, because I don’t feel like you have any major issues here, because you have a lot less problems. We deal

MICHAEL WORKMAN AVE LORETTA

with such poverty and drug abuse and fucking everything, and here it seems like, ‘uh oh. Binge drinking’s on the rise!’” While most comedians will move on from MICF and prepare to perform elsewhere, Ifft has a more important event to organise. “I’m getting back to the States, and I’m,” he pauses, “fucking who knows, I’m getting married. Yeah, I know. I still have until July, so I could fuck it up until then. I love my girlfriend and I wanna spend the rest of my life with her. I’m not so happy about the ceremony and standing in front of a bunch of people going, ‘yes I do’. I think women look forward to the wedding. No boy’s sitting there going, ‘I dream about the tuxedo I’m going to wear on my wedding day’. “Her father is a former NFL football player. Weighs about 120 kilograms, he was an offensive lineman. When I went to visit him once, they have a house up in the mountains in North Carolina, and he took me out to help him chop wood and he’s standing there with an axe, and he really said to me, ‘So, ahh, Lauren tells me she really likes you and I just wanna know what your intentions are’. And I said, ‘I would love to talk to you about this. Could we do it while doing another activity, maybe tetherball or badminton? Not chopping wood.” BY NICK TARAS

Dates: Tuesday April 16 –21 Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Times: 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $35, Full Wednesday Thursday & Sunday $30, Conc. Friday - Saturday $30, Conc. Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday and Group $28, Tightarse Tuesday $26

In his new show, Michael Workman plays a musician who returns to his hometown to visit the grave of his muse who committed suicide several years earlier. “Possibly not typical fodder for comedy, which is the challenge there,” he laughs. “It’s very downbeat.” Called Ave Loretta, the show was inspired by memory: how we remember things and how those things shape the rest of our lives and how memories can come back and have an impact on our present day existence. The comedy, Workman explains, comes from our natural reaction to trauma. When we are shocked or upset, we laugh, he says. It’s not impossible to find humour in suicide. “Whenever there’s some kind of tragic event like that, there’s many different ways to interpret it. This particular guy becomes very misanthropic and nihilistic – that’s where the comedy comes from, his attitude towards life as a result of this event. He becomes a deeply critical person and it just so happens that his criticism of society is expressed quite humorously and incisively.” Playing a musician comes easily to Workman, who worked as a composer for theatre before entering and winning the 2008 RAW Comedy competition. The show – which he describes as fiction weaved into autobiography – has a deeply personal and very political undertone. It’s about music, art and the silent war against banality. “It’s really a very musical show even though there’s no music in it. My previous shows have all had music in them, but this one which is actually about music has got nothing audibly musical,” he explains. “It’s basically about people who refuse to join the system and refuse to play the game and how that ultimately destroys them.” When asked what ‘the game’ is, Workman laughs. “I guess it’s almost a juvenile way of looking at things – people will often talk about the man and the system and how it’s designed to get you down, but I think if you set aside that sophomoric view of how the world works, but I think there’s some kind of truth to it, which is that in order to be productive in society you have to compromise your freedom and your creativity and your desire to do other things. “If you want to get a job, for example, you have to work nine to five, which means you have to be in bed at a certain time, which means really no part of your life is owned by you, it’s all owned by a company. For people who aren’t willing to do that or for people who are drawn to more creative outlets, it’s kind of an impossibil-

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ity. The show is about that, and about how one person is slowly eroded by it.” Workman happily admits that he is trying to justify his own life choices through this fictional narrative, although he does genuinely believe that we all need to be liberated from the weekly wage grind. And while he is primarily concerned with making people laugh, he would also like to make a difference in people’s lives. “The more wage slavers that I get in the better. I don’t want to preach to the choir – the point of any art should be changing the minds of people who don’t agree with you. I feel that a lot of those nine to five people often have similar thoughts that maybe they’re unsure about expressing. I’d like them to know they’re not alone.” And with a few successful years of comedy behind him, Workman is certainly leading the war for personal freedom by example. “I think comedy is the best job you can do. People often talk about how important it is to do something you love, and I’m certainly doing that. My dad always used to say if you do something you love you never work a day in your life. It’s a bit of a cliché but I find it’s pretty true.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Regent Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $25, Full Wednesday - Friday & Sunday $23, Conc. (N/A Saturday), Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20


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IDIOTS OF ANTS

MIKE BIRBIGLIA

MODEL CITIZENS

Multi award-winning sketch troupe Idiots of Ants are back with a new show Model Citizens. Getting a little bit Zen on your ass, the quartet promise the answers to questions such as whether or not an air guitar makes a sound if it were to fall in the forest. Elliott, Ben, Andy and Jim formed the Idiots of Ants under the usual circumstances, as Elliott explains. “It was the late ‘90s, a little nightclub, Friday night, 2am. It was the end of the evening and the slow song played. As we were all single we ventured away from the bar looking for someone with whom to share a dance. When we got to the centre of the dance floor our eyes met…and we fell in love. The song was My Heart Will Go On. Andy was Jack…the three of us were Rose.” Not sure if you ‘like’ Idiots of Ants? Do you remember the YouTube frenzy Facebook in Real Life, now boasting a mere nine million views? “Slightly more than a kitten with some wool, slightly less than a kitten on the keys of a piano. We are hoping to be the support act for the kitten on the keys of a piano when the kitten on the keys of a piano goes on tour. That would be ace.” When asked if negotiating the ideas of four different people was hard, the guys seemed to have it pretty figured out. “It’s not hard at all, Elliott has all of the best ideas,” says Elliott. “Elliott also does all of the interviews. He also has a lovely bottom and dreamy eyes.” Their new show Model Citizens is not based on their own self-perception. They were quick to refute that they see themselves as such. “No way. Ben is a pervert. Andy fiddles his taxes. Jim eats loads and loads of foie gras while naked and laughing. Elliott is a really great bloke. Yep, Elliott is a model citizen,” states Elliott. In a near purposeless effort to encapsulate the Idiots of Ants’ absurdity, imagine being asked to throw bread at the perfect strangers on the other side of the audience. The sense of comradeship you feel with your ‘team’ comes on swiftly and strongly, remaining with some well after the show. During their 2012 Melbourne International Comedy Festival show I recall catching myself giving an opposing bread-team member an unfriendly glance on the way out of the show, seemingly under the impression that the ‘war’ was still very much alive. Four grown men galloping about the stage, at times partially naked and potentially having to avoid an escaped bread missile; seems like ideal conditions for mishaps. An escaped dangling testicle did indeed grace one particularly lucky audience. In a slightly more flattering tale, the guys continued with their recollections of performance mishaps. “Last year at the Sydney Comedy Festival Elliott threw his back

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MY GIRLFRIEND’S BOYFRIEND WIN

TICKET S SHO TO THIS BEAT.CW AT OM.AU out playing laser tag an hour before the show. Really the show should have been cancelled but we went ahead with Elliott static at the side of the stage, hanging on to the curtains and trying not to cry in agony.” “It turned out that he had twisted his pelvis 60 degrees trapping a nerve. I don’t know how he got through it. A great actor and a brilliant man. A review of the show said that one of the performers was behaving oddly but people often say that referring to Jim.” The mishaps even continue outside of the performance arena. “Ben was once weeing in the toilet on a train when a jolt sent him falling out of the cubicle and into the carriage mid-stream.” Moving quickly on from that image, we wrapped up the interview with why people should come and see Model Citizens. “We are really proud of this show we think that it might be our best to date. And also, without an audience we are just four men standing on a stage sobbing and regretting the price of the international flight.” So do yourselves and the lads a favour, go and see Model Citizens. You might even be blessed with a stolen glance at an escaped bollocks! Or perhaps an injured performer will fight his way through the show, clutching at a curtain. Heck, you may even get to smash some slices of bread into a total stranger’s face. What more could one want from a comedy show? BY TESS WOODWARD

Venue: Victoria Hotel – Banquet Room, 215 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.15pm (Sunday 7.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $33, Full Wednesday Thursday & Sunday $29.50, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $25.50

“Some people are very confident about sex, they video tape themselves, which I’ve never understood. After I’ve had sex all I can think is, ‘at least no-one saw it’.” This was my introduction to the brilliance of Mike Birbiglia from the 2006 album Two Drink Mike. It’s the joke that got me hooked on Birbiglia’s comedy, and while he’s a sublime storyteller, Birbiglia’s early years were largely influenced by one-liner legends. “I have a lot of favorites of Steven Wright’s and Mitch Hedberg’s. My favorite of Steven Wright’s is probably, ‘I went to a drive-in movie in a cab. The movie cost me $95.’ And there’s a scene in my movie Sleepwalk With Me where a bunch of comedians are watching Mitch Hedberg’s special and he says, ‘I wrote a letter to my dad. I was going to write, “I really enjoyed being here”, but I accidentally wrote “rarely” instead of “really”. But I wanted to use it, I didn’t want to cross it out, so I wrote, “I rarely drive steamboats, Dad. There’s a lot of shit you don’t know about me. Quit trying to act like I’m a steamboat operator”.’ That makes me laugh even writing it. I love that it’s a joke-joke but it’s also kind of an emotional observation about being misunderstood.” Since then, Birbiglia has released several comedy albums, featured in film and TV (including Lena Dunham’s Girls) and has written and starred in a soon-to-be-released film based on his stand-up show, Sleepwalk With Me. “I’ve wanted to make my first feature film for the past 15 years and I finally was able to do it so it’s like the culmination of all of the comedy and writing I’ve ever done. It’s based on a true story and it’s about my semi-autobiographical character’s struggles with romance and a serious sleepwalking disorder. And it’s funny! And people in America have really taken to it and I’m hopeful that people in Australian people will take to it as well because when I brought My Girlfriend’s Boyfriend to Sydney a couple years ago it was exciting to me that it translated and that people were into it. So it’s exciting to me to see if the movie connects because I feel like it could, but I really don’t know. And it’s actually the international premiere of the movie. It’s the first time it’s played theatrically outside of the United States.” Birbiglia will make his debut at MICF with My Girlfriend’s Boyfriend – a critically acclaimed insight into his love life. He’ll be shooting a TV special for the show in about two months and is currently adapting it into a screenplay. Birbiglia is the type of comedian whose tales of helplessness and

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simple desires (like his obsession with pizza) force you to immediately like him. So much so, in fact, that the audience can become too comfortable. “It’s funny because my style is so conversational, sometimes people will heckle me without even realising that they’re heckling me. In other words, they’ll be lured into a sense of calmness by my show because I’m kind of soft spoken and they’ll start talking back to me as though we’re having a conversation and there aren’t 500 or 1,000 people sitting around them. So they’ll be like, ‘That’s a really good point.’ And I’ll have to be like, ‘We’re doing like a show right now. You’re saying this out loud!’” BY NICK TARAS

Venue: Arts Centre Melbourne, Fairfax Studio, 100 St Kilda Rd, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 4 (except Monday) Times: 7.30pm (Sunday 6.30pm) Tickets: $38, Conc., Tightarse Tuesday $33, Preview $28


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TIM FERGUSON

BARRY MORGAN

CARRY A BIG STICK

“I think it’s the best thing I’ve ever done,” says veteran comedian Tim Ferguson of his latest show, Carry A Big Stick. That’s a big call from a man who started his career as a member of the legendary Doug Anthony All Stars, going on to host the Nine Network’s Don’t Forget Your Toothbrush, host and co-write the clip show Unreal TV, and work on a multitude of other television shows as a writer, host, and actor. He even penned an alternative preamble to the Australian Constitution. Carry A Big Stick will feature tales and songs from his life in comedy, and his battle with multiple sclerosis. “It’s doing everything I want it to,” says Ferguson of the show, which he has toured around destinations including Australia, Canada and the United States of America. “It took 18 months to put it together, practice it, try it out, and sharpen it, but everybody is coming along. Everybody loves to see a sparrow with a broken wing sing a funny song.” The show has been a new experience for Ferguson, a more personal, confronting journey than previous creations. “I’ve never done a show where I’ve been this honest. I’ve never done a show where I stand and try to manipulate people’s emotions. Normally I’ve just dealt with the emotions of fear and annoyance, but this show has a lot more narrative movement. “It’s dark, it’s personal. I’ve had people crying in large numbers. It’s written so that people will actually get upset at some point,” says Ferguson. “The show is basically the story of a boy who accidentally became a Doug Anthony All Star, which was like being a comedy rock star and all that goes with it. Then his brain exploded and he decided he had to go into commercial television. My story is quite a dark and scary journey to listen to, but I always wake up optimistic.” Ferguson recounts one of his life philosophies developed over the years. “If you want to really shove it up the nose of everyone who lives in Fitzroy the best way to do it is with something which appeals to everyone who doesn’t live in Fitzroy. Most people in Fitzroy work at the venue and get in for free, so there’s no use in pandering to them. They think the world stops at Coburg, when in reality the world basically starts at Preston.” These days, Ferguson’s sights are set well beyond Preston, all the way to Canberra. He is mounting a Senate campaign as an independent ahead of the September 14 Federal election. “I first decided to run from the Senate when I heard that Julian Assange was going to stand,” Ferguson states. “I thought that if Julian got into the Senate they’re going to need someone to balance things. He hasn’t actually achieved

ORGAN IS NOT A DIRTY WORD

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Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Supper Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 7 (except Monday) Times: 5.45pm (Sunday 4.45pm) Tickets: Full $28.50, Conc. and Group $26

It’s not long into a conversation with Adelaide organ aficionado Barry Morgan that I begin to feel like I should have put on a safari suit to make this call. Barry’s passion for the organ and all things ‘70s is rather infectious. How can you possibly resist a smile when such an earnest person proclaims that he’s “very happy to have the occasion to strap the organ to the roofrack and head around the country and share a bit of organ joy”? Barry’s career as a performer, stemming from the success of his World of Organ’s Superstore in Adelaide’s Sunnyside Mall, has gone from strength to strength in recent years. “My goodness it’s taken off,” he says. “Organ joy is spreading like wildfire. I’ve been all around Australia, and last year I went to perform in Edinburgh. I was going to do a show in London for the Queen but I couldn’t book it in on time. It’s really going fantastic – business at the shop is booming, we’re selling organs at a rate of knots. All these rock stars are coming to visit the World of Organs too. Mr Gurrumul and Mr Gotye turned up and learned the one-finger method. Mr Jack Black has called up from Hollywood and he’s going to come round when he gets here. I can’t believe it really, for a mild-mannered salesman from Adelaide, it’s world domination. Look out!” And just what is the suspicious sounding one-finger method? “It’s very simple,” Barry explains. “Any finger will do, it’s entirely up to you. Get the finger up, nice and high. And when I say, ‘You just go touch and release’ – that’s forwards and backwards. It’s partly about the release, you know, it’s not all about the touch.” Each of Barry’s organs, including the Hammond Aurora Classic for example, all have a little tab. Just one push, Barry explains, and all of a sudden “away you go with beautiful instant organ music!” “I don’t know if you saw the Gotye concerts around Australia last year, but I taught Mr Gotye the one-finger method every night,” says Barry. “He took a little while to catch on but then he managed to go to America and win three Grammy Awards and I’m sure my one-finger method has something to do with it.” And if that sounds good, then you’re in luck. “I have home lessons where you can invite Barry into your home. You can either have an organ of your own or I can bring one, and we can gather a group of your friends together, have tinned pineapple for supper, and I can teach you the joys of the one-finger method. It’s community music — it’s all about everyone getting involved. If you have an aunty

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or an uncle who’d like to play, but has never been particularly musically inclined, they can get into it in less than five minutes.” I mention that I noticed Gotye failed to mention Barry in any of his Grammy acceptance speeches, interested to see what Barry’s response may be. “I’m very happy for him,” he says, commenting that everyone needs their support crew. “There’s great people behind me like Nigel and the boys at Sweetmeat Butchers. They help me pack the organs onto the roof of the Toyota Crown every time I’m off to do a demo. Mr Gotye had been working on all that stuff for many years, I think it’s just fabulous, it’s a real joy.” Barry’s new show, Organ Is Not A Dirty Word, is coming to Melbourne. “Things are quite good in the shop, but it’s under a bit of a threat. A man by the name of Braden Caden has opened up an electronic piano shop right next door.” But Barry’s not taking it lying down, he’s innovating. “I’ve developed my handsfree method for enjoying the organ which I will be demonstrating. Fresh out of 1976 on the Yamaha PlayCard Organ.” BY JOSH FERGEUS

Venue: Trades Hall – New Ballroom, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 - April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7pm (Sunday 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $28, Conc. Friday & Saturday $26, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $25, Conc. Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $23, Group $22 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Laugh Pack $22 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday & Preview $20


RANDY IS SOBER

Meet Randy: the purple puppet who has co-hosted the Melbourne International Comedy Festival OXFAM Gala, sold out seasons to his shows with pal Sammy J, and performed all over the world. Randy is back with his first solo Melbourne show, Sober. Randy’s life has been fairly outrageous from the day he graced this Earth as a little baby purple felt puppet. Born into a modern day Vaudeville family, his calling has always been to entertain. “My dad would give me a nip of whisky before going onstage from the age of about five. He was trying to loosen me up a bit because he used to throw me through sets and stuff. You know, that thing where if you’re tense, you’re more likely to break bones. So yeah, it was great times,” Randy said fondly, too damaged to recognise the abusive undertones of his harrowing tale. “I guess drinking has always been in my blood. But Sober isn’t like a weird reformed drinker telling people not to drink. It’s not even a series of drinking stories. It’s more of a reflection of the time I had on my hands.” What sort of things could we expect from such an abundance of spare time? “One of the things I started doing when I quit drinking

STEPHEN K AMOS THE SPOKESMAN

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Stephen K Amos returns to the loving embrace of his Melburnian fans this season with a show about avoiding the spotlight. At first glance, this is an odd subject for the silver-tongue Brit, who has frolicked and cavorted in the public eye for more than a decade, but as Amos explains, there is more than one kind of public attention. “I have been asked to become a spokesperson for a couple of groups in the UK, which has led me to question myself and my ability to actually be a spokesperson,” he says. “At the end of the day, you’re just a comedian really, and in a certain way you’re not really acting your age because you’re approaching a mid-life crisis.” In the new show, Stephen K Amos is The Spokesman (the title is an anagram of his name), but the role is confined to an hour of good comedy. In real life, he has decided, he is no leader of men. “People look up to you for various reasons, but I’ve got to be honest, I’m not a good person, I’ve done bad things,” he laughs. “I will let you down. People looked up to Lance Armstrong and were amazed at his prowess and his achievements – not one, not two, but seven Tour de France titles and then going on to beat cancer, and then creating a very good charity that raised millions of dollars for other people, and now we find out it was all based on lies. That leaves a real nasty taste in the mouth. I would never offer myself as a spokesperson for anything, because I’m not perfect.” Of course, he’s not willing to tell you why. “If I hinted at what scandals had occurred, someone would read this article and dig deep, or worse, somebody would try and make a mint by claiming they were injured or something,” he says. “Thankfully, I’m a single man. I have a couple of friends in England, comics who are married and have kids, who took social media chats a bit too far and they were scandalised in the media in England. ‘Look at you, filthy blah blah blahs!’ They got caught out. And you know, it happens to me all the time – people send me Facebook and Twitter messages that are a bit cheeky. Sometimes you reply, sometimes you don’t, but you have to be very, very careful. People have offered me drugs at gigs, all sorts of things! I’m not saying I’m perfect, I may have indeed dabbled in lots of unsavoury activities, I just don’t want to set myself up as a target.” Much of his thinking in The Spokesman revolves around public perception and personal freedom. Amos is unwilling to shackle himself with being a public role model because he already feels limited by other people’s judgements and opinions. “I’ve been thinking about what we’re supposed to be doing at certain ages and why society says we have to do this at that age, and that at this age, and why society says we have to conform to certain rules,” Amos says, politely declining to reveal his own age. “People pigeonhole you when they know your age. I should be dressed a certain way because I’m a certain age, or I should like a certain type of music, I shouldn’t be into technology or computer games because that’s all for the younger generation. I just think, why? Age is but a mere recording of time. I get on with people of a variety of ages. But particularly in this job, you can be seen as a veteran comedian or an old-timer just because of your age. I’m loathe to be described with these laden adjectives; ‘veteran black stand-up’. I mean, do you have to say all of that? I do have other qualities.” The point, he says, is to be your own person and don’t give a damn about the rest. “I think when you’re a younger person you try to fit in and be part of a group, then when you get older and wiser and see more, the last thing you want to do is tow the party line and be a sheep. You want to express your individuality,” he says. “And if you do get yourself into trouble, make sure you don’t get caught.” BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $42.50, Conc., Group $39.50, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $35

was Pilates, and at the end of that five months of doing Pilates every day my perineum had a six pack.” Randy didn’t need to pause even slightly when asked about his greatest triumph. “I’m really good at tying knots,” he blurted out proudly. “If you’ve got like a trailer loaded up with furniture, I can do the best trucky stitches this side of Wanthaggy.” Immediately casting aspersions on his self-confessed greatest triumph, Randy continued with his most embarrassing moment. “I was showing off my knot-tying skills with an aforementioned load of furniture. I was trying to show some school kids how cool I was at tying knots and the truck lurched forward and a giant cabinet fell off the truck and squashed the children. It was pretty embarrassing. I still get a bid of red colour in my cheeks when I talk about it now. Of course I got the hell out of there. I’m not sure how they faired but it was pretty exciting at the time.” A minor achievement compared to knot tying but it is also worth mentioning Randy won a Barry Award with Sammy J from their 2010 show Ricketts Lane. “Winning the Barry Award was really cool! Now we have something to put at the top of our posters. Actually no let’s face it, the only reason I did comedy is to win awards. Comedy is nothing but a competition, and we won it that year!” While Randy and Sammy J are still collaborating regularly, they have their own solo shows this year. “I’m very much looking forward to seeing Sammy’s show because I will no doubt heckle. I’ll probably sit

in the front and scream, ‘Tell us a joke’ and ‘Where’s the purple guy?’ He pretends he doesn’t, but he really does like it a lot.” When Sammy J and Randy performed The Inheritance they were subjected to a rather odd heckle: an audience member confessing (unprovoked) that he had lost his perineum. Randy paused momentarily when he was asked about this, clearly not remembering the exact occasion. Ever a professional, this did not faze him even slightly, his determination to answer proving to be the overwhelming factor. “We were in Montreal and a guy stormed the stage with a vortex between his legs. There was a swirling black hole where you could see universes forming. You could clearly see that he had misplaced his perineum so he was wandering around trying to find it. We managed to use it, we got the audience back on side but it was touch and go. Everyone was accusing us of stealing it. It threw us a little bit.” The utter cornucopia of perineum opinion and fact that followed almost led me to believe Randy had been desperately waiting for an interviewer to mention the word. Now he could finally educate the world. “I like talking about it because a lot of people don’t know what it is! I very much enjoy getting the audience to tell each other what it is. I don’t often stop to discuss it but occasionally you just get that ripple of need. It’s a good bit. It doesn’t get the kudos it deserves. Everyone is focused on the brackets either side of it. If I can leave the readers of Beat Magazine with one thing it would be their perineums.” Failing you all, I didn’t clarify if Randy was referring to leaving you with greater perineum awareness, or the act of taking all of your body parts

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minus your perineums. If anyone does go to see Randy and finds out it was the latter then I truly do apologise. If you weren’t already convinced to check out Randy is Sober, his closing words provide a persuasive argument: “Come and see it! Come and see it heaps!” BY TESS WOODWARD

Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 - 29 Time: 9.45pm Tickets: Full $32, Conc. $28, Group $26

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FANFICTION COMEDY We all have our secret pop cultural desires and fantasies – what would it be like if Hermione Grainger hooked up with Marty McFly from Back To the Future? If he could, would Glee’s Burt Hummel caress you tenderly with his rough, mechanic hands? Youthful New Zealand collective Fanfiction Comedy ask just these kinds of questions in their act, lovingly drafting stories about all kinds of popcultural mash-ups, and then reading them out to audiences of like-minded weirdos. They’re going to be all up in the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, and it’s going to be glorious. “We met performing in weird late-night comedy shows in Auckland,” founding member Heidi O’Loughlin tells me of the group’s origins. “We wanted to set up a gig where we could make all the ridiculous pop-culture jokes that wouldn’t really fly on your standard club night, but at the same time would be very inclusive of the people who were maybe slightly less savvy.” These noble desires pulled them together as a group, but there were other practical concerns at work. “We also wanted to a gig where we could just read off a piece of paper,” O’Loughlin adds, deadpan. Thus, Fanfiction Comedy was born. Everyone in the group has dabbled in fan-fiction in their own ways. As youngsters, Joseph Harper would write Michael Parkinson fan-fictions for the amusement of his mum, and Joseph Moore produced his own line of copyright-infringing Goosebumps books. O’Loughlin herself dreamed big, running a virtual Hogwarts website on Geocities Pagebuilder. These days, they tackle all the fan fiction ‘juggernauts’, from Batman and Doctor Who, right through to more niche concerns, like The Sims and the BBC architecture show Grand Designs. A lot of fan fiction is sexual in nature, but some goes broader, and invents whole new worlds and stories for favourite TV shows and characters – O’Loughlin tells me that theirs is more of the second variety. “We generally prefer not to go too hard on the banging,” she says. “Our mums sometimes pop along, so you’ve got to be careful. Our worlds go as broad as our imaginations feel like taking us on the day – we’ve had Macbeth retold in the world of Pokémon.” The only rule is to keep things light. “Even though the characters are fictional, sometimes when writing you worry about where you’re going with them,” she continues. “There was one story that never

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quite saw the light of day that retold Lolita at Hogwarts with the Sorting Hat as Humbert Humbert. It was poetic but ultimately gross.” A typical show involves the entire group sitting on stage and listening to each other’s stories – “kind of like a weird, nerdy focus group,” O’Loughlin explains. “After each story, the MC and our idiot-savant mate Steven Boyce gives critical feedback, usually completely ignoring anything that was said.” While they’re a shy bunch and don’t go in for too much audience interaction, they do appreciate the effort that crowds put in. “Our audience members have been known to occasionally dress-up in costume, and we totally encourage that,” she says. “Fanfiction Comedy is a pretty safe place.” It seems there are many closet fan fiction writers among the comedy community. At last year’s festival, the group had celebrity guests like David O’Doherty, Tom Ballard and Sam Simmons come and read their work, and they promise more of the same this year. “We know Josie Long, Wil Anderson, Tegan Higginbotham and Justin Hamilton will be dropping in, and we’ll be announcing the full lineups shortly on our website,” O’Loughlin says. “Basically, we’re just trying to get our favourite people along.” BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venues: Melbourne Town Hall – Cloak Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD (Monday) & Victoria Hotel – Banquet Room, 215 Lt Collins St, CBD (Saturday - Sunday) Dates: March 30 – April 21 (Saturday - Monday) Times: Monday 7pm, Saturday 5.30pm and Sunday 4pm. Tickets: Full $24, Conc. and Group $20

BANE 1 Joe Bone’s multi award-winning show Bane 1 arrives in Melbourne after four years of success with an entire Bane trilogy in Edinburgh. A mixture of comedy, music, action and drama Bane 1 is performed with Ben Roe’s live musical accompaniment and has recieved wide acclamation. The show follows tough talking hitman Bruce Bane and his ferocious adversaries, all of which are performed by Joe Bone. “I started to do this character because I was watching a lot of film noir, so it seemed like a good idea. I started switching into other characters and having a bit of a play on stage and it’s developed from there.” “It’s been interesting to see the different audiences I’ve attracted. I’ve done shows for university students, school kids, I’ve even toured where the majority of the audience are 60+. I worried they wouldn’t get it as there are some fairly dark sections, but they really lapped it up.” Joe admitted his previous misconceptions were not properly thought through. When trying to extract what personality type would be ideal to see his show, he could only muster the following recommendation. “People that shouldn’t come to see it…Hmm. The usual really: racists, murderers, paedophiles – those kinds of people. I don’t fancy performing to them.” I sincerely hope that leaves most of this readership in the clear. “Bane is kind of a parody/pastiche of movies so I had to do research through films. It’s slightly pointless looking up the real life of a hitman because I’m not really playing on that, I’m playing on the fact that it’s all fake and silly.” You would additionally assume a hitman’s biography, resume or address wouldn’t be readily available online. “Yes, I suppose it might be hard to go about that? That does sound like a lot of fun though. I guess if I got any bad reviews I could give the person I had done research on a call and maybe he could sort them out for me?” Even though he plays multiple characters faultlessly, Joe doesn’t like to get into character/s before a show. “I don’t like to do a warm-up. I have a chat with Ben backstage, the lights go on, he walks on stage and then I have about 20 seconds where I kind of get ready. There’s no specific routine I have to get into character but that’s partly because when I have tried that in the past I feel like I lose a bit of energy or authenticity.” Whether or not he can effectively prepare himself before a show, he cannot always be prepared for what the show might bring him. “I’ve tripped up a lot. I often jump into character quite literally, and can lose my footing for half a second. I’ve performed on a lot of different stages. Once I performed at music festivals on muddy hills which can make jumping into

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character quite challenging. It’s not an ideal stage”. Safely back on a wooden stage in Melbourne, the audience might even be graced with Bane 2 or 3. “I might even try and throw in a couple of performances of the sequels over the weekends if I can work out a venue.” Considering previous standards, your muddy backyard might be just the venue Joe is looking for. Approach him after a show and try your luck. “I’m going to write the fourth Bane but then I am going to stop because I am writing a whole new show at the moment. I’m writing a trilogy where I am playing loads of insects in a miniature world. I’ll be playing ants and wasps and spiders and mice. It’s quite different but in a similar style to Bane. “Hopefully they don’t start to run into each other. I don’t want insects to appear in Bane and villains featuring in the insect play. I don’t know what insect would be a hitman, probably a praying mantis?” Unfortunately it’ll be at least a year until we get to see any insect assassination thrillers. In the meantime, check out Bane 1 at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival this year. Unless you are a paedophile. BY TESS WOODWARD

Venue: Trades Hall – The Quilt Room, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Streets, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $25, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack, Tightarse Tuesdays and Preview $20


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DAVID O’DOHERTY

SEIZE THE DAVID O ’ DOHERTY (CARPE DO’ ’ DIEM) Though the idea was to follow in his father’s footsteps, life had other plans for David O’Doherty. “I wanted to be a piano player like my dad, but then, incrementally I became a comedian. I think this happens with most careers. I started out with one intention, but was terrible at that, so, almost by a process of elimination, I ended up doing comedy,” the Irish comic recalls. “My father had written a lot of radio comedy when I was growing up, so comedy was the other family business. But it was never an X Factor kind of follow-your-dream thing. I just found something I really enjoyed, and kept doing it.” Incidentally, O’Doherty is now known as comedy’s own maestro of Yamaha keyboards. A simple yet effective philosophy has directed the nature of O’Doherty’s stand-up over time. “My

brother instilled in me the idea of just talking about what you find funny. It’s all very well trying to figure out what makes other people laugh, but that’s boring, and leads toward a kind of consensus ‘identikit’ comedy,” he muses. “It’s much more interesting to think of the times when something has made you laugh uncontrollably and then try to get across that emotion on stage, to try to convince people why a certain ludicrous notion is funny. That’s where a lot of my stuff comes from.” An acclaimed festival favourite, O’Doherty hones his craft with each performance. After all, in comedy, there are lessons and epiphanies aplenty. “I’ve learned so much every year. Every year I listen back to the previous year’s show and find a lot of it naïve and lame and terrible. I’ve written a new hour each year for ten years now, and they are definitely getting better. I write bits and pieces and do stuff for UK television, but stand-up is the only thing that keeps me up at night... mumbling incoherent ideas into my voice-memos. Maybe this will change at some point in the future, but writing these shows has been my absolute obsession for the last ten years.” This year, O’Doherty returns to the festival to perform Seize The David O’Doherty (Carpe DO’Diem). It marks a departure from his previous show David O’Doherty Is Looking Up. “I wanted to write a cheerier show than last year, which was about getting over a breakup,” he explains. “I wrote that show and toured it, and it was a tricky show to do, because it took me back to a very bleak time. So the plan with this show was to do jokes. Lots of stupid jokes.”

The fundamental idea of ‘carpe diem’ seems to strike a chord in O’Doherty. “People photograph their dinner with an Instagram lens and look at it while the food is getting cold. The idealised version of the thing has become better than the actual thing… and that can’t be good,” he declares. “The problem with living in the world of ideas is that you get tangled up in the stupid windmills of your own crappy mind and end up thinking about everything too much. “I think the human mind is like an old Sega Dreamcast or a Super Nintendo and we are trying to play Playstation 3 games on it. I hope this metaphor works, I don’t know much about computer games. ‘Carpe Diem’ is a bit of a naff greeting card clanger, but I have certainly tried to enjoy the world more in recent years. Not think about whether the glass is half empty or full, but just drink the fucking thing.” The new show will see O’Doherty tackle some tricky issues, with a fearlessness that runs in the family. “My mother really carries the weight of the world. She wants to fix everything, all of the time... which is very comforting when you’re younger,” he asserts. “But as you get older you see that some people have certain areas of expertise and there are other things they should shut the fuck up about. This show will be a failure, as I imagine I’ll fail to fix everything that’s wrong with the world, but I’ll have a go.” BY NICK MASON

Venue: Forum Theatre - Upstairs, Cnr Flinders & Russell St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.30pm (Sundays 6.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday — Saturday $38, Full Wednesday — Thursday & Sunday $34, Group $32 and Laugh Pack $32 (N/A Saturday), Conc. (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $30, Preview $28

RUSSELL MCGILTON

BOMBAY TO BEIJING BY BICYCLE

The feeling of restlessness can inspire people to do some crazy things. Take writer and comedian Russell McGilton, whose need for adventure led him to take an epic bicycle trip across Asia, a trip that almost killed him. His show, Bombay To Beijing By Bicycle, is a record of the experience. “My father passed away the year before, and I had a crisis of confidence in what I was doing with my life,” he tells me, of the inspiration behind the trip. “I wondered what I really wanted to do. I came across a book by an Irish writer, Dervla Murphy, who cycled from Dublin to Delhi in 1963. She had all kinds of amazing adventures — she was attacked by wolves, she met a lot of people. I’d always wanted to go to India and China; and the idea of Bombay to Beijing started to seem pretty appealing.” The idea of cycling was attractive to McGilton, who wanted to see more of the countries than he might on a standard backpacking holiday. “I found, as I travelled, that the bike acted as a conduit to all kinds of amazing stories,” he says. “I wanted to see the real India. I saw towns where no white people had ever been through, and they were amazed to see me. People were constantly stopping me to talk, or inviting me in for chai. It was great.” Some of these experiences were more terrifying than others. “There was a girlfriend I travelled with for a while, and as went through some of the more wild and lawless parts of India, where they had never seen a blonde-haired, blue-eyed Western woman, people kept trying to grab her. We realised after a while that we needed to get out.” McGilton was chased by rhinos in a national park, and spent some time in the same Pakistani town where he later discovered Osama Bin Laden was hiding out. The defining moment of the trip, however, was when he contracted malaria. “That was interesting,” he says with a wary laugh. “I started getting these fevers, and ended up in a small town, right next to a train station. I could hear the announcers all night as I lay awake feeling dreadful, and I just remember hoping ‘I hope it’s not malaria’. I went to the clinic the next morning, and after the blood test, the doctor said, ‘Congratulations, you are having the malaria!’ I asked if it was cerebral malaria, the one that kills you, and he said, ‘Yes, yes!’ He was great though, he was just very excited to look after me.” These experiences proved to be the inspiration for a book, and a raucous stage show. Those who plan on seeing McGilton should be warned though, it gets extremely physical. “I have a story about a monkey who jumped on this lady and started pleasuring itself as its huge balls flapped around,” he tells me, “and the monkey is part of the show. Most nights, I’ll find a man in the audience, jump onto them and act the incident out.” Predictably, this doesn’t always go well. “One night, performing the show in Adelaide, I did the trick to a man who started shouting and hitting me,” McGilton says. “He was going ‘get off!’ and I was going ‘I’m trying to!’ Everyone thought it was hilarious except for him, and I think he actually turned out to be a patron of the theatre, which was a bit unfortunate. Another time, I did it to a Fringe Festival judge. I tend to pick the wrong people.” BY ALASDAIR DUNCAN

Venue: The Tuxedo Cat, 17-23 Wills St, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 9 (except April 3) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $26.50, Conc. $23.50, Group $22.50, Tightarse Tuesday $17.50, Preview $16

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RICH FULCHER

TOMMY LITTLE

Weird, surreal and unfailingly silly, Rich Fulcher has won himself a legion of fans with a relatively small body of work. He is best known for his recurring guest role as Bob Fossil in The Mighty Boosh – a brash, nonsensical American who yells loudly while affecting gleefully inappropriate facial expressions. Serious comedy lovers may have stumbled across Rich’s off-the-wall work in the BBC series Snuff Box, and a lucky few may have caught his first Melbourne International Comedy Festival show, Mom, I’m Not A Lawyer. If you’re not familiar with him, there’s only one thing you need to know: the comedians you love, love Rich Fulcher. From Bill Bailey to Julian Barrett to Russell Brand, he has made good friends in very high places. For obvious reasons, he says. “I think I can throw very far and I’ve had massive sex with most of them.” Rich has guested on The Sarah Silverman Show, Children’s Hospital, Nevermind the Buzzcocks and even Skins, but his greatest success came with the publication of his book in 2009, called Tiny Acts Of Rebellion – 97 Almost Legal Ways To Stick It To The Man. A manifesto for the whimsically minded social dissident, it has been published in the US, UK and Australia and has even spurned a tiny movement. “I was asked to write a book and I thought to myself, ‘What do I feel comfortable talking about without a saddle?’ And I realised that ever since I was a kid I would do these ‘tiny acts of rebellion’. They’re basically little things like putting old lady pants in your mom’s trolley or giving the finger to a waiter under the table or yelling, ‘I like fudge’ at a funeral,” Rich explains. “You feel like you’re celebrating your rebellious spirit but without all the potential prison rape.” About 80 Rich Fulcher fans came together in London to celebrate the book’s release with a tiny acts flash mob, mustering in the rain to flip the bird at Big Ben at a pre-designated time. Rich was standing amongst them in a moustache and a bowler hat. Since then, he has encouraged the movement by introducing the #tinyacts hashtag to Twitter and encouraging his audience to tag their tiny acts of rebellion. One fan left a plate of double chocolate cupcakes outside a Weight Watchers meeting. Another ran a few metres in front of a jogger and started screaming as though she was being chased. A third left the following message in 78 point font on her co-worker’s computer: YO TENGO HERPES. “Anyone can do it. It’s universal. And everyone has done a tiny act. I would bet money (or at least soup) that even the Pope has unbuckled his safety belt on the plane before it’s docked,” says Rich, who continues to think up new tiny acts

He’s taken his comedy from the stage, to the airwaves, to the screen, and yet, in spite of his triumphs, Tommy Little remains refreshingly down-to-Earth. “It’s important for people not to forget we’re fucking jesters,” he muses. “It’s very easy for comedians to get caught up in their own worth and think they somehow have something actually worthwhile to offer the world. It’s bullshit: we’re just joke-monkeys.” Humility is among Little’s strong suits. Even the suggestion of stand-up comedy as a vocation is one of pure flattery. “I’m chuffed that you even call it a career. I think that’s the first time that’s ever happened. Let’s crack a bottle of wine!” he jokes. “I sucked at everything else, that’s why I do comedy. I’m a drama-drop-out and you only get into drama when you can’t get into anything else. If I fail at comedy, watch out mime school: here I come.” Little sees great importance in self-critique as a means to an end. “I’m brutal on myself. I don’t think anyone gets into comedy without being brutal on themselves,” he suggests. “I think anybody who wants to be good at their job and improve at their job has to be able to step back and evaluate where they went wrong, what was good and what could be made better...otherwise you spend the whole day patting yourself on the back and you don’t change anything.” The need to adapt is not lost on Little, whose career has gone from strength to strength since his festival debut in 2007. “When I started comedy — and I still do love it — but when I was starting comedy, all I did was love it. I wasn’t making any money from it, I was working other jobs... I always had a slight desire to take over the world but I didn’t see it as a direct stepping stone. As it starts to become a full-time job, and there’s other people involved who’s money is at stake, there starts to become challenges and pressures.” Little returns to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival with a brand new show titled Sex, Drugs & Herbal Tea. “I basically wanted to do a show about being young and dumb. I think it kind of sums up what it’s like to be my age today,” he explains. “I think we party just as hard as generations previously and we do all the same stupid things, but now there’s this funny element of, ‘I drink green tea once a week and therefore I’m looking after myself!’ or ‘I go to one session of yoga and think everything’s fine!’ It’s adorable.” In creating his new show, Little drew from his own experiences. “Probably over ten years of binge drinking is where it comes from. It’s all drawn from my own life, which, thankfully, gives me an excuse for fucking up a lot of the time. ‘It’s work! Puking into the fountain at the hotel is work, damn it! Let me work my genius.

TINY ACTS OF REBELLION

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SEX, DRUGS & HERBAL TEA

every day. “Most of them revolve around your life, like when you’re at a hotel and you make your own do not disturb sign that says ‘do not clean up blood’.” There is a certain grace to it, Rich insists, which is why it’s funny. “First, these are not pranks, which have no purpose other than to get someone. Tiny acts are for yourself and often happen in the privacy of your own mind. Also, it usually serves a societal purpose like protesting holidays by giving your dad a Father’s Day card on Mother’s Day and refusing to give your mom anything. I think people who think that vandalising something is a tiny act have the wrong idea. You must be creative, not destructive… now that I’ve said that, I do like to write on cats.” The point of his latest solo show is to guide people through the process. With his book in hand and a few years worth of ideas up his sleeve, Rich Fulcher brings the Tiny Acts of Rebellion stage show to Melbourne this year. Although, he thinks the best way to appreciate it is to stay away. “Buy a ticket and not show up,” he says. “Then I wouldn’t have to do the show and then we’d all meet up at Riverside Skate Park and do the show there.” Brilliant. BY SIMONE UBALDI

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 15 – 21 Times: Monday 6.30pm, Tuesday - Saturday 7pm, Sunday 6pm Tickets: Friday - Saturday $36, Monday, Wednesday Thursday & Sunday $34, Group & Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) $32, Conc. $28 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday & Preview $28

, BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

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Yes, I’ve worked my genius all over the walls. No, I’ll clean it up tomorrow.’ “ Chances are, if you tuned into Nova sometime over summer, you’d have heard Little livening up the airwaves. “It was great. I was working as a fill-in for Hughesy over summer. I’ve done years of community radio and I love it. I think it’s a great medium and there’s heaps of fun to be had.” “It probably helps that I was just a fill-in for summer and there weren’t too many expectations on it, but I had pretty much free reign… in terms of creative decisions. I was actually allowed to make all of them,” Little explains. “Which I probably shouldn’t say because that means if there were bits that people didn’t like I could have probably used the excuse that it was someone else pulling the strings. Nope, that was me!” So what’s next for Tommy Little? “I do genuinely want to take over the world. I would love a tonight show — that’s kind of my dream — and tour whilst I’m doing that. I really can’t think of anything better in the world than that.” BY NICK MASON

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Cloak Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Time: 8.15pm (Sunday 7.15pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $27, Full Wednesday - Friday & Sunday $24, Conc. Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $22, Preview $20


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KKEVIN EVIN KROPINYERI WELCOME TO MY WORLD

Australia’s premiere Aboriginal comedian, Kevin Kropinyeri, takes you on a discovery of what it’s like to be a black man in Australia. Kevin covers his childhood, black-in-laws and extended family, in a way that will have you both learning and laughing about his Aboriginal heritage. Combining his past experiences as a state grade footballer and basketballer to add physical comedy to his already outrageous humour, Kevin produces a show in which you’ll be gasping for breath

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Lunch Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $22, Group, Laugh Pack and Conc. $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

CHARLIE PICKERING & WALEED ALY THE WORLD’S PROBLEMS SOLVED

Together, Charlie Pickering and Waleed Aly promise only one thing – to achieve world peace in four shows. No big deal.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Lower Town Hall, 90 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 31, April 6, 14 and 21 Time: 5:30pm (Sunday 4:30pm) Tickets: $40

WIL ANDERSON A

NINA CONTI

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DOLLY MIXTURES

Ventriloquist Nina Conti is back with her Edinburgh Fringe sell out show, Dolly Mixtures, showcasing festival faves – including her foul-mouthed monkey puppet, Monk – as well as introducing us a host of demented and intriguing new puppets helping Nina spout thoughtful meditation on love, life and the edge of existence.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Lower Town Hall, 90 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 - April 14 (except Mondays) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $37, Full Wednesday -Thursday & Sunday $35, Group and Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $31, Conc. (N/A Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $28

SAM SIMMONS

PETER HELLIAR

This year, the master of suburban, absurdist comedy returns with his very own Shitty Trivia - a powerful and life-changing hour of questions. You’ll learn nothing, but you’ll look at the world differently. It’s safe to say no two shows will be the same and no audience member safe. When you’re at a Sam Simmons show you are all in. Adventurous is an understatement. Unique doesn’t even cut it. Sam is entirely Simmons.

Obvs, espesh, ridic, awks, totes – who the hell knows what the youth of today are talking about? Peter Helliar, that’s who. Pete is ditching his Malvern Star for a fixie, replacing his trackie dacks for a pair of skin-tight jeans and turfing his Reeboks for vintage slip-ons. Oh, and he’s getting as many tattoos as he can – completely on trend, of course. He’s on a mission. He’s getting to the bottom of why the nation’s hipsters are offended by a couple of extra syllables, and then he might reacquaint them with some good old fashioned words, like “especially”.

SHITTY TRIVIA

Three years ago, Wil made the decision to step back from regular media commitments so he could concentrate on live performance and has shared the stage with some of biggest names in comedy, including Louis CK, Stephen Fry, Alan Davies, and the great John Cleese who even named Wil as one of comedy’s hottest acts. But if you’re not sure whether to trust Mr Cleese, trust the thousands of audience members over the last three years who have voted him Bulmer’s People’s Choice Award Winner for the last three years.

Venue: Princess Theatre, 163 Spring St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8:45pm (Sunday 5:15pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $45, Friday - Saturday & Sunday $40, Conc, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $35, Preview $30

WHATEVS (…FOREVS)

Venue: The Hi-Fi, 125 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: March 28 – April 7 7pm (Sunday 6pm), April 9 – April 21 9:45pm (Sunday 8:45pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $34, Full Wednsday - Friday & Sunday $28, Conc, Laugh Pack and Group $26 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $24

Venue: Victoria Hotel - Banquet Room, 215 Little Collins St, CBD Dates: April 9 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $35, Full Wednesday - Friday & Sunday $33, Conc, Laugh Pack and Group $30 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $25

presents

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DIXIE LONGATE

MY BAGS WENT WHERE? Tall, slim, flowing red locks and a killer pair of legs. No, it’s not Emma Stone, it’s Dixie Longate – Melbourne’s favourite American bogan superstar is back. Since storming the Spiegeltent in 2012 armed with Tupperware, tales and titillation, our busiest plastic party lady has been caught up in a worldwide tour. However, disaster is afoot for this award-winning tour-de-force. Dixie arrives in Australia only to find out her bags have gone missing. With only the essential carry on Tupperware items to show, Dixie will entertain with her loose fables instead of her compact containers. Join Dixie for relentlessly funny, boldly raucous and genuinely heartfelt tales of her adventures as she straddles all four corners of the globe and brings smiles to all the locals’ faces while doing so.

Venue: The Forum - Downstairs, Cnr Flinders & Russell Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 14 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $34, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $30, Conc. Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $25.50

RUBBERBANDITS DITTS

With over 23 million YouTube views, sold out shows from New York to Newcastle and a Chortle award under their belts, these urban ‘hib hop’ plastic bag heads from Limerick, Ireland make their Australian debut with their hilarious comedy rave fresh from the Edinburgh Fringe. The Rubberbandits are Mr Chrome (the wiry one, who claims Iggy Pop is his dad, real name Bob McGlynn) and Blind Boy-Boatclub (shorter one, real name Dave Chambers). They shot to fame in 2010 with their riotously satirical hit single Horse Outside, with follow up singles Spastic Hawk and Blackman proving these boys are no one trick ponies. Get high on Irish history and down with popular culture as this wild comedy duo take to the stage for an hour of masked musical mayhem.

Venue: The Hi-Fi, 125 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 7 (except Monday) Times: 9.45pm (8.45pm Sundays) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $35, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $31, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $30, Conc. (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $26

MAX AND IVAN ARE CON ARTISTS

Award-winning comedy duo Max and Ivan come knocking on Australia’s door for the very first time armed with their acclaimed and epic narrative sketch comedy heist. Six excons, one final job. The Hacker. The Smooth Talker. The Mercenary. The Driver. The Architect. And Graham (he does HR, mainly). All are reunited by the Ringleader to conduct one final sting – taking down an oligarch. If we told you any more, we’d have to kill you. Luckily, that’s more or less the plot. Max and Ivan are… (really) Max Olesker (taller, curly-haired, a bit Jewish and a bit more foppish) and Ivan Gonzalez (shorter, knitwear fan, formerly chubby). Together they write and perform comedy that has been setting stage and screen alight across the UK.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Powder Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sundays 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $31.50, Full Tuesday - Thursday & Sunday $29.50, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) & Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $25.50

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JUDITH LUCY & DENISE SCOTT THE SPIRAL

Two of our funniest are joining forces for an evening of short stories, tall tales and jokes at each other’s expense. One sought spiritual enlightenment, one ‘found herself’ on all fours by the roadside. Grab a wine and settle in for the funniest night of conversation you’ll hear this festival.

Venue: Princess Theatre, 163 Spring St, CBD Dates: March 30 - April 21 (Saturday - Sunday & April 4, 5) Times: 7pm (April 13 & 20 5.15pm) Tickets: Full $45, Preview $37.50

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Powder Room, Cnr Swanston and Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays and April 7) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $32, Full Wednesday Friday & Sunday $30, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack $26 (N/A Friday & Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $26

MY EGO IS BETTER THAN YOUR EGO

Tom desperately craves attention and validation. That’s why he does comedy and radio and TV. But sometimes he desperately craves attention and validation so much that he gets kicked out of a home and is labelled a rape apologist.

Venue: Swiss Club, 89 Flinders Ln, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $28, Full Wednesday Friday & Sunday $26, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) $24, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $22

FYLM-MAKKER

Venue: Victoria Hotel – Vic’s Bar, 215 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday & Saturday $33, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $30, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $29, Conc. (N/A Saturday), Tightarse Tuesday $28, Preview $25.50

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Venue: Hairy Little Sista - The Upstairs Lounge, 240 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 7 (except Monday) Time: 9.30pm Tickets: Full $22, Conc. & Group $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

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DAVE THORNTON TALL AND POINTY

You’ve seen him on the Gala and heard him Fox FM, and with height and angles on his side, Dave Thornton is back, live on stage. For a cracking night out you can’t go past this honest, engaging, whip smart and damn funny star on the rise.

Venue: Victoria Hotel – Banquet Room, 215 Little Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sundays 8.45pm) Tickets: Full Saturday $30, Full Wednesday Friday & Sunday $26, Conc., Group, and Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) $24, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $22

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MEL BUTTLE In Fylm-Makker, a 2012 Edinburgh Fringe smash-hit, Simon Munnery is at his ground-breaking best, deploying an uncanny combination of lo-fi special effects and high-tech gadgetry. Experimenting with a tiny camera and a big screen, he creates and performs sketches, animation, music and stand-up all live on screen and backed by a soundtrack devised and dexterously played by Mick Moriarty. Cutting edge, ingenious and absurdly hilarious.

Cam Knight graces our Melbourne stage again after selling out at Sydney’s Comedy Festival. The epitome of your classic Aussie bloke, Cam’s brilliant story telling is both clever and mirrors reality, which is what sets him apart from the rest. Cam has also worked on Foxtel’s Comedy Channel as a writer and host, in particular for the show Stand Up Australia, where he successfully wrote new material everyday for the five nights a week show. Known for loving a good bash followed by an epic spooning sesh, Cam is someone you just can’t miss.

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SIMON MUNNERY

JUST ANOTHER MISFIT

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TOM BALLARD RD D

IS GUILTY

Feel guilty about feeling guilty? Cal doesn’t. She’s great at it. She can feel guilty about anything –shoddy recycling, misleading tourists, sleeping in. Kick off the Guilt Quilt, share the blame, and tame the shame….if you don’t come, you’ll feel awful.

CAM KNIGHTT

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CAL WILSON N

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HOW EMBARRASSMENT

Mel Buttle is a comedian who struggles with embarrassment, her desire to put cats in costumes and keeping up to date with writing in her feelings journal. Mel has had a cracker of a year, scoring her own segment with Tom and Alex on triple j, feeling comfortable making eye contact with bus drivers and not to mention that her hit podcast The Minutes with Mel and Patience debuted at #2 overall on iTunes (whatever though). Despite her success Mel Buttle is writing this with Cheezel-stained fingers in her pyjamas but wants you to know even though she’s crippled by this awkward third person writing style she’s very professional.

Venue: Victoria Hotel – Acacia Room, 215 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15 (Sundays 6.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday & Saturday $25, Full TuesdayThursday & Sunday $20, Conc. Friday & Saturday $20, Conc. Tuesday - Thursday & Sunday, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday) and Laugh Pack $15

DAMIEN POWER MONKEYS IN SPACE

When the first monkey went into space, he floated amazingly above the Earth, surrounded by incredible technology. Alone and anxious, all the monkey did was masturbate. As society and technology moves forward at an exponential rate propelling us further from our roots, we are confused, distracted and less engaged in the world outside of ourselves. We really are just monkeys in space.

Venue: Portland Hotel – Locker Room, Cnr Russell & Lt Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full Friday & Saturday $20, Full Tuesday -Thursday & Sunday $15, Conc. $15, Preview $10

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AKMAL

Akmal returns by popular demand for four performances of his 2012 hit show. This year’s show promises to be Akmal’s most punctual, and jam-packed with lots of words – some of which he will be using for the first time. Also, for the first time in the history of the festival, Akmal will be appearing in high definition 3D (glasses not provided). Movies, sketch, stand-up, TV appearances, radio DJ and talk show host, improviser and published author, Akmal is one of Australia’s most respected, successful and accomplished comics. He displays an incredible ability to deal with hot topics in a hilarious and slightly offensive way.

Venue: Athenaeum Theatre, 188 Collins St, CBD Dates: April 5-6, 12-13 Time: 9.45pm Tickets: $39


THE COMEDY ZONE Fresh meat hit the stage in a collaboration of selected comedians from across Australia, by non other than the directors of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. After doing time locally this is their chance to get on the comedy scene for good. Said to be the five best newbies in the country, this innovative bunch to hit The Comedy Zone are Hayman Kent, Ivan Aristeguieta, Neel Kolhatkar, Tien Tran and Amos Gill.

DEADLY FUNNY Deadly Funny gives you the chance to hear from the best Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander comedians from across the country in a one-time afternoon performance. Hosted by the hilarious Constantina Bush, and starring Sean Choolburra and Kevin Kropinyeri, this show is filled with sassy black humour originating from the dawn of time.

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Venue: Trades Hall - Old Council uncil ChamCh Cham Cha h mbers, Corner Lygon and Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 8.15pm (Sunday 7.15pm) Tickets: Full $23, Group and Laugh Pack $21, Conc., Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $18.50

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Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Lower T Town H Hall, ll Corner Swanston and Collins Sts, CBD Date: April 7 Time: 3pm Tickets: Full $23.50, Group and Conc. $15

THE FESTIVAL CLUB

The Festival Club is back again and this time ABC2 is documenting this late-night comedy extravaganza. Whoever said what happens after midnight can just as easily occur before 9pm has clearly never pushed their bedtime. Head down to the basement for once-in-a-lifetime acts that’ll have you gasping for breath. Even comedians come here to watch other comedians brave the limelight. Special nights include a ‘yacht rock’ night hosted by Geraldine Quinn and her Spandex Ballet, So You Think You Can Clown? And ’10 Comedians for 10 Bucks’ on Wednesdays for all of you with sad-looking bank accounts. Follow this with some shenanigans on the dance floor and this is the place to be any night of the week.

Venue: The Hi-Fi, 125 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 20 (except Mondays) Times: 11.15pm (Sunday 10.15pm) Tickets: Tuesday - Wednesday $10, Thursday - Sunday $15

HEADLINERS

Headliners is a rotating bill introducing Melbourne to what’s heating up on the US comedy circuit. The A-List comedians performing this year include Michael Che, Iliza Shlesinger, Eddie Pepitone, James Adomian, Pete Holmes, Brendon Walsh, Jessica Kirson and Ian Edwards. From winners of NBC’s Last Comic Standing to writers of Saturday Night Live, Headliners features an all-star cast and thousands consider it a must-see at every MICF.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall, Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (8.45pm Sunday) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $35, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $31, Laugh Pack, Group (N/A Saturday) $30, Conc. (N/A Saturday), Tightarse Tuesdays $28, Preview $26.50

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RAW COMEDY NATIONAL GRAND FINAL IN L

Laugh into Longroom for Comedy Festival Drinks! Head into Longroom Bar & Restaurant this Comedy Festival before or after a show and enjoy $8 Festival cocktails on presentation of your ticket for that night.

While most of us have been enjoying our summer festivals and getting up to all kinds of shambles these past three months, comedians from around Australia have been battling each other in open-mic competitions to be crowned the 2013 RAW Comedy National Champion. Judges have narrowed it down to a field of 12 freshmen who will brave the stage and past RAW comedy finalist, Matt Okine, will reveal the winner on the day.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Main Hall, Corner Swanston and Collins Sts, CBD Date: April 14 Time: 5pm Tickets: Full $34, Group and Laugh Pack $31, Conc. $26

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UPFRONT

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Unlike your 18th birthday, Upfront gives you a night you can remember in this special performance that will be featuring the best female comedians in the world. Hosted by Geraldine Quinn’s Spandex Ballet and with personalities like Claire Hooper, Cal Wilson, Fiona O’Loughlin, Hannah Gadsby, Loretta Maine and more, this is the club your parents wished you’d snuck into.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Main Hall, Cnr Swanston and Collins Sts, CBD Date: April 17 Time: 7.30pm Tickets: Full $42.50, Group $37.50, Conc. $30

Georges Building 162-168 Collins Street, Melbourne

www.thelongroom.com.au Phone 9663 7226 Email events@thelongroom.com.au Open Tuesday to Saturday

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DAYNE RATHBONE IT’S ME DAYNE

GENEVIEVE FRICKER

Ryan Coffey combines hilarious banter with his loop-pedalling, beat boxing, wailing talent to create a show that has featured in all of Australia’s biggest summer music festivals such as Falls Festival, Woodford Folk Festival, Harvest Festival, Folk, Rhythm & Life and St Kilda Festival.

Allow Dayne to take you on an extraordinary journey down the rabbit hole in his latest show, It’s Me Dayne. It’s not so much a journey where you will reach conclusions about your life as Alice did, but you’ll be laughing hysterically so it won’t matter. Who cares if it’s only his debut at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, he’s already won the RAW Comedy competition in 2011 and that’s legit enough for us.

A sell out at both the Sydney Comedy and Fringe Festival in addition to making the finals in 2011’s RAW Comedy competition, Gen Fricker has had a fantastic lead up to 2013. Telling hilariously true stories of heartbreak and good intentions, Gen gives the audience a bizarre performance they won’t forget.

Venue: Upstairs Lounge - Hairy Little Sista, 240 Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (Except Mondays) Time: 10:30pm Tickets: Full $21, Group and Conc. $16, Tightarse Tuesday $14

Venue: Portland Hotel – Portland Room, Cnr Russell & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $20, Tuesday-Thursday & Sunday $15, Conc. $15, Preview $10

RYAN COFFEY LATE AND LOUD

PARTY POOPER

Venue: Forum Theatre – Carpet Room, Cnr Flinders & Russell Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 6pm (Sunday 5pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $20, Full Tuesday - Thursday & Sunday $15, Conc. $15, Preview $10

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Venue: Portland Hotel – Gold Room, Cnr Russell & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full Friday-Saturday $22, Full Tuesday Thursday & Sunday $18, Conc. Friday - Saturday $18, Conc. Tuesday - Thursday, Sunday and Preview $15

JOHN CONWAY

THE NEW CONWAY TONIGHT SHOW The biggest stars of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival delve into talk show anarchy on The New Conway Tonight Show. International comedy madman John Conway holds together an hour of raw comedy, interviews and surprises. It's late, it's live, it's off the cuff.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall, 90 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (Thursday - Sunday) Times: 11pm (Sunday 10pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. and Group $18

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THE DARK ROOM

John Robertson recreates the online interactive game The Dark Room where the audience participates by playing the hero, and John plays the villain: a floating head with a British accent. Over 300,000 people have played The Dark Room via YouTube, with only two winners so far. Prizes are given to those who succeed whilst losers receive punishment. The Dark Room has sold out in London, Adelaide, Edinburgh, Perth and Brisbane. For 60 minutes venture into a gaming world where you make the decisions: can you escape the Dark Room?

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall - Cloak Room, Corner Swanston and Collins Sts, Melbourne Dates: Monday April 1, 8, 15 Time: 8.15pm Tickets: $22.

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RONNY CHIENG

MICHAEL HING OCCUPY WHITE PEOPLE

JOHN ROBERTSON

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Michael Hing has been doing the racist getup for a while, he is Asian after all, but it never gets old with his fresh outtake and enthusiastic delivery. You may have seen his face on Channel Ten’s Can of Worms where he’s continued to share his socialistic and political views, all wrapped up in comedy. Selling out shows at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival and Sydney Comedy Festival, this year Michael is bringing more hypocriticism to our stage with Occupy White People.

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NIKKI BRITTON ABDICATING CHILDHOOD

When you hear the words ‘nine to five’, ‘life plan’ or ‘mortgage’, do you want to sprint, pigtails flying, in the other direction? Nikki’s latest show discusses how in the process of becoming an adult we can’t help but freak out a little. Using her charismatic wit and interpretive dance skills, Nikki shares with you her investigation into the fear behind all this growing up.

Venue: Forum Theatre – Ladies’ Lounge, Cnr Flinders & Russell Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 6pm (Sunday 5pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $20, Full Tuesday Thursday $15, Preview $10

JOSH EARL IS A LIBRARIAN

Josh Earl and his guitar grace our stages again with his latest comical song about being a librarian. Turning even the most mundane into comic gold, it’s no surprise he’s sold-out seasons in Brisbane, Adelaide and Perth, strumming his way through The Dewey Decimal System from 001 to 920.7. Josh has not only performed on Spicks and Specks, Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation and the Melbourne International Comedy Festivals Allstars Gala, but he writes and performs Melbourne radio 3RRR sketch show, Lime Champions.

Venue: State Library of Victoria – Village Roadshow Theatrette, Entry 3, 179 La Trobe St, CBD Dates: April 12, 13, 19, 20 Times: 8pm Tickets: Full $25, Group, Laugh Pack $20, Conc. $17.50

CAN YOU YOU DO THIS? NO YOU CAN’T

Ronny Chieng has already proved as one to watch, performing at the exclusive Montreal Just For Laughs Festival, ABC’s comedy, Problems, and at the Soho Theatre in London’s West End, in addition to selling out seasons at Melbourne and Sydney Comedy Festivals. With a bachelor of laws and commerce under his belt, Ronny chose comedy over a job offer in Malaysia, and we’re glad he did. Blunt, confident, and quick-witted, Ronny is funny as hell.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Council Chambers, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 7pm (Sunday 6pm) Tickets: Full Friday-Saturday $25, Full TuesdayThursday & Sunday $20, Conc. Friday-Saturday $20, Laugh Pack (N/A Friday & Saturday), Conc. Tuesday -Thursday and Preview $15

STEEN RASKOPOLOUS BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN LIVE IN CONCERT

Steve, wait, Steen, is back again and this time he’s written a one-man show, Bruce SpringSTEEN Live in Concert! You may have seen him in groups such as the Axis of Awesome, Cookin Peaches Productions and GAME TV, but his most recent stint was with the sketch comedy group The Delusionists, where they sold-out shows at both the Melbourne and Sydney Comedy Festivals. Using physical comedy and various personalities Steen brings you comedy at its finest.

Venue: Portland Hotel – Gold Room, Cnr Russell & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 6pm (Sunday 5pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $20, Full Tuesday - Thursday & Sunday $15, Conc. $15, Preview $10

ANTHONY SALAME STEVE HUGHES THE CLOWN PRINCE BIG ISSUES

Known as the ‘King of Urban comedy’ Anthony has been on the comedy circuit for eight years now. His audacious style has lead to sold-out shows at international comedy festivals and all of Australia’s comedy hotspots. With somewhat of a musical edge, Anthony has worked as comic support for De LA Soul, LL Cool J and Bobby Brown, as well as performing alongside big names like Jimmy Carr, Pablo Francisco and Jeff Ross.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Lunch Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 1, 8, 15 Times: 7.15pm Tickets: $25

, BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

Don’t be put off by this longhaired, beer-drinking, heavy metal drummer’s façade because this Aussie is sharp-witted and side-splittingly hilarious from start to finish. Sipping his beer, Steve discusses political correctness, the PalestinianIsraeli conflict, asylum seeks and the War on Terror. Steve has featured on BBC and Channel 4 after his recent UK tour (he’s literally just stepped off the plane). Get in quick because there are only three shows for this comic genius.

Venue: Forum Theatre – Downstairs, Cnr Flinders & Russell Sts, CBD Dates: April 18 - 20 Times: 8.30pm Tickets: Thursday $30, Friday - Saturday $34


BEAT MAGAZINE’S COVERAGE OF THE 2013 MELBOURNE INTERNATIONAL COMEDY FESTIVAL CONTINUES Got a show in the comedy festival this year? Let everyone know through Beat – the proud publisher of The Comic Strip and Comic In The Corner. Heavily discounted advertising packages including free editorials, images, giveaways and more apply all throughout the festival dates (Wednesday March 27 – Sunday April 21). For more information please email ronnit@beat.com.au or call (03) 8414 9700

Available in stores and online now www.viavision.com.au I *While Stocks Last , BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

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JON BENNETTT FIRE IN THE METH LAB

Jon Bennett is known for his storytelling, and this time the breaking news is his older brother, who is currently residing in jail. Audiences will hear this unruly tale of crime, bikers, high-speed car chases, exploding houses, cancer and everything in between, that will make you question multiple times whether this man should still be alive. Cheating death is no laughing matter, but somehow Jon puts a spin on it where even those on the inside crack a smile.

Venue: Tuxedo Cat, 17-23 Wills St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Wednesdays) Times: 8.30pm (Sundays 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $20, Tightarse Tuesday and Conc. $15

JACQUES BARRETT THE CONTRARIAN

Jacques Barrett takes audiences on a journey through somewhat of an intervention in contrariety with his latest performance, The Contrarian. Leave that level head of yours at the door because Jacques doesn’t want a bar of it in this absurd rollercoaster of an intervention that’ll have you walking out of it exclaiming, “What kind of a mind fuckage was that?!” And you’ll feel weird and good about your new outtake on the world, all at the same time.

Venue: Tony Starr’s Kitten Club, 1/267 Lt Collins Street, Melbourne Dates: March 28 – April 20 (except Sundays and Mondays) Times: 9.45pm Tickets: Full $22, Conc., Group $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

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NATH VALVO

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ALMOST 30

Wiping the dust off a mammoth succession of sell out seasons in 2012, star comic and radio personality Nath Valvo will put the icing on the Melbourne International Comedy Festival cake with his latest comedic feat, Almost 30. In the lead up to his momentous 30 year milestone, Valvo will share his most horrendous, awkward and downright embarrassing personal accounts of prior birthday parties with eager audiences. Tales of his intoxicated mother passing out at his 16th birthday party, to a near death experience on a golf course are just the beginning of Valvo’s comedic repertoire. Expect barrels of hilarious, excruciatingly awkward and humiliating personal anecdotes, which Valvo effortlessly intertwines with his irrefutable comedic aptitude and razor sharp wit. Come along and see why audiences and industry alike consider Nath Valvo as a rising star in Australian comedy. Venue: Trades Hall – The Annexe, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.30pm (Sunday 8.30pm) Tickets: Full Wednesday - Saturday $20, Conc. Wednesday - Saturday $17, Group, Laugh Pack, Tightarse Tuesday, Sunday and Preview $15

JOEL CREASEY THE DRAMA CAPTAIN

Joel Creasey's life is like a Broadway show. And every good blockbuster has bundles of conflict – something Joel can't seem to avoid. At age 16, Joel Creasey rigged an election ensuring he was elected Drama Captain of his high school. Ever since, that title seems to have stuck, literally. At just 22, he's been dumped, fired and beaten up. Luckily Joel is armed to face all this with his two greatest weapons: an acid-tongue and a bangin' haircut. Coming off a sell-out season of Naked in 2012, don’t miss this opportunity to see Australia’s hottest rising star of comedy!

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Portico Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.45pm (Sundays 8.45pm) Tickets: Full $22, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

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JARYD JEKYLL LOONY BIN

He is possibly the only absurdist loop pedal beatboxing stand-up comedian who does magic, in Australia – if not the world. Mr. Jekyll’s style is a blend of ‘Why am I here?’ and ‘What the fuck is going on?’, with a splash of ‘...did I leave the kettle on?’. He will lure you in with his discombobulating yet charming presence, and bend your perception of reality. Watch as he uses vocal percussion and off the cuff antics to show you things you’ve never seen before. Throw in a whole bunch of other up-sleeve tricks and you have a wonderfully weird widdle werformance. Come and be confused by one of Sydney’s freshest up-and-coming comics!

Venue: Word Warehouse, 14 Goldie Place, CBD Dates: April 2-3, 9-10 & 16-21 Times: 9.30pm Ticket: Full $15, Conc., Group, $12, Preview $10

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ALEX WILLIAMSON AND FRIENDS

Rising to fame through YouTube, Alex Williamson (aka Shooter Williamson) will be debuting at this year’s comedy festival alongside crass “friends”, Slutty Professor, Loosest Aussie and Musical Drug Dealer. Alex has ramped up his YouTube followers to 160,000 and has received over 25 million views. Alex is the whole shebang being savvy with filmmaking, radio (featured on SAFM and Austereo comedy station as “Barry”), singing, acting and even plays the guitar and piano. Continuing to add to his versatile character, Alex delved into stand-up comedy six years ago and in 2009 was a state finalist in the RAW Comedy competition. Already selling out 12 consecutive shows in most of Australia’s major cities in 2012, Alex’s hilariously tactless show Alex Williamson and Friends is bound to be a hit.

Venue: Trades Hall – New Ballroom, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.30pm (Sunday 8.30pm) Tickets: Full $29, Group & Laugh Pack $25, Conc. $24, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20

GREG FLEET

THE BOY THAT CRIED SOBER If you’ve heard of Ten Years In A Long Sleeved Shirt then you’ve heard of Greg Fleet and his powerful discussions of life as an addict. The Boy Who Cried Sober reopens this wound and this time he’s not holding back. Greg goes hellbent with all the gory details that come hand-in-hand with addictions to love and drugs like pain, humility, devastation, heart-break…look we won’t ruin it for you, find out what happens when you wake up in a Dublin hospital for yourself in his hilarious new show.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Backstage Room & Council Chambers, Cnr Swanston and Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 Times: Monday 7pm, Tuesday - Saturday 9.30pm, Sunday 8.30pm Tickets: Full $29, Group, Laugh Pack $25, Conc. $24, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $20

SCHOOL DANCE NCCE

This is a story of three nerds. They're on a mission to be popular, but they don’t stand a chance. They don’t have girlfriends, in case you hadn’t already guessed. (Re) live the exquisite awkwardness of high school in this flagship Windmill Theatre production and Melbourne International Comedy Festival highlight. Set to a killer ‘80s soundtrack, this one’s an ode to helpless teenagers everywhere – and all of us who once were. Following sold out seasons in the Adelaide Festival and Sydney Festival, the School Dance is on, Melbourne. Get a date.

Venue: Arts Centre – Playhouse, 100 St Kilda Rd, CBD Dates: April 10 – 20 (except Monday) Time: 6.30pm Tickets: Full $29, Group $26.50

JEFF GREEN

LEAPING OFF THE BELL Have you ever wondered what it would be like to throw in your job for a life in show business? Leave a stable but unexciting relationship? Write a simple book that becomes a best seller, move countries, tear down your life and start all over again? “Discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or a nation.” Oscar Wilde. British funny man Jeff Green left university with an Honours Degree in Chemical Engineering, a new high powered job, proud parents and a deep feeling that he’d made a huge mistake. And so he embarked on a quest to discover his true calling. Where he found it, was beyond his imagination…25 years into a career as a stand-up comedian, best-selling DVDs, books and numerous awards, Jeff loves his job. But how did it all happen?

Venue: Swiss Club, 89 Flinders Lane, CBD (Tuesday - Sunday) & Melbourne Town Hall – Supper Room (Mondays), Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 Times: Tuesday - Saturday 8.15pm, Sundays 7.15pm, Mondays 9.30pm Tickets: Full $32, Group, Laugh Pack $27, Conc. (N/A Saturday) $25, Tightarse Tuesday $24, Preview $22

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A MODERN DECEPTION

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LIVE TO AIR

Featuring some of the most beautiful and difficult illusions ever conceived, this show combines comedy with stunning magic to make you laugh and gasp at the same time. In A Modern Deception: Live To Air three magicians are asked to fill in for a live-to-air morning show, where despite rarely being on the same wavelength, they manage to pull off the most unbelievable hour of television Australia has ever seen. Wondrous tricks are presented via a series of crossed lines and non-sequiturs to create a truly spectacular, cheeky and funny explosion of magic.

Venue: Comedy On Collins - The Scots’ Church Assembly Hall Building, 156 Collins St, CBD Dates: April 2 - 21 (except April 6, 7, 16) Times: 8pm (except April 5 8.30pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc., Group and Tightarse Tuesdays $18

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WONDERLAND CARNIVALE

An astounding line up of Australian and International Top Headlining comedians, acts of intrigue and wonder, acrobatics and World Class Sideshow antics in the Carnivale world of the Wonderland Spiegeltent. Step right up to Wonderland Carnivale and see Lilikoi Kaos, “The Princess of Circus, Sideshow and Vaudeville” as well as the most unique standup comedy acts in the World, The Nelson Twins as seen on Australia’s Got Talent. With sell out shows in the Edinburgh festival and headlining the circuit Australia wide they have been dazzling crowds with their cheeky humour. Each evening will feature a special headline act including Dave O'Neil, Fiona O’Loughlin, Ian Bagg, Lehmo, and Mick Malloy.

Venue: Wonderland Spiegeltent, 120 Pearl River Rd, Harbourtown, Docklands Dates: Dave O’Neil March 28 – March 30, The Nelson Twins March 28 - April 30, Ian Bagg April 4 – April 13, Fiona O’Loughlin April 11 – 13, Lehmo & Mick Molloy April 18 – April 20 Times: 7.30pm Tickets: Full $25, Group and Conc. $20

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RICH HALL

Straight out of Montana, Rich Hall is back for a limited season, letting loose his wry, satirical scorn, never short of targets for his growling indignation. His ode to Bundaberg Rum, first performed at the Festival, has earned him honorary bogan status throughout Australia and someday he would like to own a Boston Terrier. He’s a complex man. Don’t miss this comedy great as he lets loose his hilariously wry, satirical scorn on all manner of subjects – from life to politics and culture high and low – never short of deserving targets for his growling indignation.

Venues: RMIT Capitol Theatre, 113 Swanston St, CBD (Tuesday - Sunday) & Melbourne Town Hall – Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD (Monday) Dates: March 28 – April 7 Times: 9pm (Sunday 8pm) Tickets: Full Friday - Saturday $37, Full Wednesday - Thursday & Sunday $35, Group, Laugh Pack (N/A Saturday) $33, Conc. (N/A Saturday) and Tightarse Tuesday $30, Preview $28


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ALASDAIR TREMBLAY BIRCHALL TRYING HARD

Directed by Ted Wilson, Alasdair intertwines his bizarre and contemplative humour to ponder the heavy questions of morality.

Venue: Forum Theatre - Carpet Room, Cnr Flinders and Russell Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 9.45pm (Sundays 8.45pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $18.

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LAPHAM AISHA THE GEISHA EISH HA FABIAN AND THE ACTUAL MUSICIANS

EM RUSCIANO

PUBERTY, RHYTHM AND BLUES

Confusing time in your life? Your body’s changing, hormones are flying left, right and centre so that you can’t even see straight? Em Rusciano touches on all of this with her show Puberty, Rhythm & Blues. Em shares her knowledge through incorporating songs into her pubescent stories filled with awkwardness and all things sexual.

Venue: Forum Theatre - Pizza Room, Corner Flinders and Russell Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 7.15pm (Sundays 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $25, Group, Laugh Pack and Conc. $20, Tightarse Tuesday $15, Preview $17

AND THE DAIRY CHICKS MEMOIRS OF AN AISHA

Follow Aisha The Geisha through her journey as she tries to salvage her engagement with captain of the Nar Nar Goon Goons football team, Craig, after he falls for Japanese beauty, Yumiko, on a football trip to Japan. Aisha sets off to the Tokyo jungle, along with her band The Dairy Chicks, to become a Geisha and convince Craig that farm girls do it better.

Venue: Revolt Melbourne, 12 Elizabeth St, Kensington Dates: April 10 – 21 (except Monday and Tuesday) Times: 8pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full $23, Conc. and Group $20

GOD FIGHTS THE DINOSAURS AND 9 OTHER STORIES THAT WILL AWESOME YOU IN THE FACE

Fabian Lapham and his full backing band The Actual Musicians promise non-stop entertainment riddled with quirkiness, crafty wordplay and excellent storytelling. FYI it would be in your best interest to wear a t-shirt repping either dinosaurs or the big man.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 13 - 21 (except Wednesday) Times: 7pm (Sundays 6pm) Tickets: Full $20, Tightarse Tuesday, Conc. and Preview $15, Group $12

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MATTY GREY AGE-LESS 2: GAME ON

Matty Grey delves into the ever-expanding world of online (and even offline *shock horror*) gaming to produce a show the whole family will love. Filled with dangerous levels of energy his examination of today’s entertainment will leave your kids in stitches of laughter, however post-show laundry may be required.

Venue: Comedy On Collins - The Scots’ Church Assembly Hall Building, 156 Collins St, CBD Dates: April 2 - 13 (except Sunday) Times: 11.30am (second show on Thursdays at 1.30pm) Tickets: Full $15, Conc. $13, Group $12.50, Tightarse Tuesday $12.

THE RAPTURE

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Armageddon is upon us…again. Your soul is in jeopardy. But don’t despair - come and be saved! We’re pretty sure Jesus is coming this time. Come and meet him. It’s the last Mass ever. Let Fathers Equinus and Farkas rub your sins away with a wet flannel soaked in their special Holy Water. Rejoice and laugh as you ascend to heaven, while everyone else burns in eternal agony. A wickedly, unholy comedy created by John Forman and Christian Bagin, with the assistance of a Holy Spirit.

Venue: Revolt Melbourne – The Theatre, 12 Elizabeth St, Kensington Dates: April 3 –20 (except Monday and Sunday) Time: 9.30pm Tickets: Full $23, Conc., Group, Laugh Pack $18, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $15

NICK KESIDIS N

ONE LONELY GUY MAGIC SHOW O He started his love of magic when he decided to quit smoking. To help beat the habit he began carrying a pack of playing cards where his cigarettes used to be and within the first year won his first magic competition, soon after that he starting performing around Australia as well as abroad. When armed with a pack of cards, handful of coins and his quick wit he is ready to entertain anyone, anywhere, at anytime, proving once and for all he's a lonely guy with way too much spare time.

Venue: Comedy on Collins - The Scots’ Church Assembly Hall Building, 156 Collins St, CBD Dates: April 2 –14 (except Monday) Times: 8.30pm Ticket Prices: Full $20, Conc $17, Group $12.50

DOM ROMEO O

AND GUESTS STAND-UP SIT-DOWN: COMICS IN CONVERSATION

What goes on tour stays on tour…until it’s revealed in StandUp Sit-Down! Your favourite comedians talk about their work and life, lifting the lid on how and why they do what they do.

Venue: Victoria Hotel - Acacia Room, 215 Little Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 20 (Thursday - Sunday) Times: 11pm (Sundays 10pm) Tickets: Full $15, Conc. $12, Group, Laugh Pack and Preview $10

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ANIL DESAI

LISA-SKYE

Following his 2012 hit show Night at the Movies, the UK’s funniest and fastest globe-trotting impressionist turns up the laughs as he wrestles with his life and love of movies in this brand new, action-packed, feel-good show.Join Anil as he twists, turns and transforms himself into our favourite movie stars! Featuring new live movie trailers, stories, celebrity anecdotes and an all-star cast of impressions!

Melbourne 1976: Bunny & Maddog meet at a disco. A mechanic with an army behind him and a beautiful girl from the underbelly. Melbourne 2013: Lisa-Skye ruins dinner parties with terrifying anecdotes she mistakenly thinks are ‘charming’. But are 2013's pleasures different from 1976’s? Is anything? A fascinating glimpse into modern-day hedonism. '70s life, '90s childhoods, contemporary indulgences, told by "a striking, original voice in comedy" (Australian Stage).

Venue: Word Warehouse, 14 Goldie Place, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 21 (except Mondays) Time: 8pm Tickets: Full $20, Conc., Tightarse Tuesday $15, Preview $10

Venue: The Tuxedo Cat, 17-23 Wills St, CBD Dates: April 11 - 21 (except Wednesday) Times: 8.30pm (Sunday 7.30pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. $16, Group, Tightarse Tuesday $15, Preview $12

ANOTHER NIGHT AT THE MOVIES

MARK TRENWITH AFTER DARK

Mark Trenwith is rising to be one of the country’s most exciting comedians. A highly energetic and ridiculous performer, Mark is a past Moosehead Recipient and was crowned 2010 Adelaide Comedian of the Year. It’s highly likely Mark will be wearing a leotard or bad wig, impersonating the carpet or referencing MacGyver. Expect brilliant game shows, facts about fish and a cameo from Tom Selleck. It’s that kind of a show.

Venue: Tuxedo Cat, 17 - 23 Wills St, CBD Dates: April 11 - 21 Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. and Preview $16, Tightarse Tuesday $13

SONGS MY PARENTS TAUGHT AUGHT ME

JACK DRUCE

UNQUALIFIED LIFE COACH Jack is on a self-help crusade! Join him on his quest to understand and master: motivation, social skills, courage and horsemanship in his new life-changing show!* He has no formal training in psychology (or anything else) but he more than makes up for this with his acute knowledge of Star Wars and his ability to over think everything. *Life changing in the sense that life is ever-changing.

Venues: Spleen Bar, 41 Bourke St, CBD (Tuesday - Saturday) & Melbourne Town Hall – Lunch Room (Mondays), Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 15 (except Friday and Sunday) Times: 8.15pm (Monday 8.30pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. $18

RAMA NICHOLAS

XAVIER TOBY

A wrongly outlawed cowgirl, a vengeful, passionate Spaniard and a love sick horse flee to Mexico on The Day of the Dead. They find themselves in deep trouble when the Spaniard confronts Death himself for taking his love. But, is Death all he’s cracked up to be? The cowgirl, Caterina, risks it all, when she falls for the Spaniard and faces a shootout with the villainous sheriff and an unlikely destiny.

Telling people your accountant smells is rude. Telling people all accountants smell is an incorrect generalisation. Telling people that every Antarctican accountant smells is racist. It’s also impossible, because nobody’s from Antarctica. Unless your accountant is a penguin. According to fact and common sense, that’s grossly incorrect, whether we’re talking about penguins or not. Picking on penguins is mean. How racist are you? How racist am I? In Australia, how racist are we? Let’s find out!

DEATH RIDES A HORSE

Venues: The Tuxedo Cat 17-23 Wills Street, CBD (March 27 - April 9) & Revolt Melbourne, 12 Elizabeth St, Kensington (April 11 - 20) Dates: March 27 – April 20 (except April 3, 10, 15) Times: March 27 – April 9 - 10.45pm (Sunday 9.45pm) April 11 - 20) - 7.30pm (Sunday 5.30pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc., Group, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $18

WHITE TRASH

Venue: Imperial Hotel, Cnr Bourke & Spring Sts, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 9 Times: 9pm Tickets: Full $20, Conc., Group $15, Tightarse Tuesday $10

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CHOIR GIRL

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A girl joins a choir after being dropped from her last one. And the one before that. And the one before that...Have you ever felt that there’s a fine line between dedication and obsession? Comedic storyteller Sarah Collins and powerhouse theatre company Attic Erratic delve deep into the world of group singing to bring you a tale of isolation, connectedness, unrequited love and madness. A dark comedic tale of a dedicated choir girl whose single-minded passion is accompanied by a live choral score that will blow you to the wall.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Supper Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 1,8,15 Time: 7pm Tickets: Full $23, Conc. $20, Group, Laugh Pack $18

SIMON PALOMARES STILL CRAZY

Internationally-acclaimed Australian comedy legend Simon Palomares brings his one-man show to MICF. This year has seen Simon perform in four countries in two different languages. The charming, hilarious master storyteller is in a show not to be missed. The Spanish-Aussie comedian returns with a new show and a defiant take on life, love, relationships and the questions that keep us awake at night.

Venue: Three Degrees QV Square, Cnr Swanston & Lonsdale Sts, CBD Dates: April 9 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 7.15pm Tickets: $25

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MAX ATTWOOD

AM I BETTER THAN GANDHI? There have been 105 billion people alive over the course of history. Some of them have been better than others. In his hilarious new show, comedian Max Attwood answers the question Am I Better Than Gandhi?* Along the way, he’ll examine world records, sexy Mother Teresa and unstoppable toddler armies. *Spoiler: No.

Venue: The Tuxedo Cat, 17-23 Wills Street, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 9 (except Wednesday) Time: 6pm Tickets: Full $17, Conc. $14, Group, $13, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $10

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NICOLE HENRIKSEN AND WHAT’S NAKED UNICORN VOMIT YOUR FREAKING PROBLEM???

Fresh from her debut show, Technicolour Sarcasm (with Nazis), at the Sydney Fringe and Newcastle Crack Theatre Festival in 2012, and a sold out debut at the Adelaide Fringe in February, Nicole brings her second full length comedy show to Melbourne with her new piece of amazing, Naked Unicorn Vomit. It’s the next level of fast-paced, high-energy, diabetes inducing comedy, jam-packed with characters, misogynistic rap songs, witty stand-up and like…heaps of bright colours. If you like your comedy “normal”, then perhaps you’d like to give this one a miss.

Venue: Dane Certificates Magic Tricks, Gags and Theatre, 859a Sydney Rd, Brunswick Dates: April 2 – April 13 Time: 9pm Tickets: Full $15, Tightarse Tuesday $12

Stuff pisses us off so we made a show about it. What are the things that irritate us? Old people. Scientologists. Vegetarians. Small sized shirts. Old people. Women. Misogynists. Crazy cats that crap on a couch instead of their bloody litter tray. Old people. Tony Abbott. Angry comedians. Old people. But what annoys us the most? You. Go and eat a pile of horse manure.

Venue: Chekhov Drama Studio, 175-177 Chapel St, St Kilda Dates: April 3 – April 7 Time: 8pm Tickets: Full $15, Conc. $10

WIN

VS THE AUSTRALIAN WOMEN’S WEEKLY CHLDREN’S BIRTHDAY CAKE BOOK

Swimming pools! Race cars! Steam trains! Robots! Dolly Varden? This show has them all. In 1981 Lyn Earl purchased a book that changed the history of the Earl family forever. After sell-out seasons in Adelaide, Melbourne, Brisbane and Perth, Josh Earl is bringing back this award-winning show. So come on Melbourne, treat yourself to seconds.

Venue: State Library of Victoria – Village Roadshow Theatrette, Entry 3, 179 La Trobe St, CBD Dates: March 29-30, April 5-6 Time: 8pm Tickets: Full $25, Group, Laugh Pack $20, Conc. $17.50

JOHN ROBERTSON KINKLING

John Robertson is wild. His voice is deep and resonant. He dresses like it’s the 18th century and has all the morals of the Marquis de Sade. Now, with a wink and a grin, here’s some sex and violence.

Venue: Portland Hotel – Locker Room, Cnr Russell & Lt Collins Sts, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 20 (Thursdays - Saturdays) Times: 11pm Tickets: Full $22, Conc, Group, Laugh Pack $18, Preview $15

Hungry for a really good laugh? Squeaky Clean Comedy returns with a massive two-hour feel-great feast of funny. It’s comedy for everyone by some of Australia’s finest. Presented in partnership with World Vision, it’s an hilarious night out while helping to raise awareness of food security issues in developing nations. Featuring Dave O’Neil, Michael Connell, Mike Klimczak, Beau Stegmann, Sarah Jones, Mark Pengilly, Miss Friby and special guests!

Venue: Melbourne City Conference Centre, 333 Swanston St, CBD Dates: March 30, April 6, 13, 20 Time: 7.30pm Tickets: Premium Seating $35, Full $30, Conc. $25, Group $24

WIN

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JOSH EARL

SQUEAKY CLEAN COMEDY

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THE FAIRYTALE COOKBOOK

Comedy festival veterans, Impro Melbourne, present an exciting new show, The Fairytale Cookbook. You, the audience, cast the actors, choose the characters for the tales and guide the hero safely (or dangerously!) through the adventure you’ve helped create. With three separate fairytales every show, there’s something for the entire family.

Venue: Melbourne Town Hall – Powder Room, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 9 – 14 Time: 2pm Tickets: Full $15, Group $12, Tightarse Tuesday $10

MADELEINE TUCKER OLYMPIK PHEVER

Fresh from an extended season due to popular demand at the Melbourne Fringe Festival, bespangled entertainer Madeleine Tucker has been given her big chance to shine filling in as the presenter for a late-night Olympics TV special. Tune in for a surreal homage to the kitsch of the Olympics and the faded world of variety television.

Venue: Forum Theatre – Pizza Room, Cnr Flinders & Russell Sts, CBD Dates: April 9 – 21 (except Monday) Times: 6pm (Sundays 5pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc, Group and Tightarse Tuesday $15

WIN

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NICHOLAS J. JOHNSON

TODAY, TONIGHT, TOMORROW, THE WORLD Award-winning comedian Nicholas J. Johnson has been on TV. Not just any TV, he's been on Today Tonight as an expert on con artists. What happens when a man who will do anything to be famous meets a TV show that will do anything for ratings?

Venue: Comedy On Collins – The Scots’ Church Assembly Hall Building, 156 Collins St, CBD Dates: April 2 – 21 (except Monday) Time: 9.30pm Tickets: Full $20, Conc. $17, Group, Tightarse Tuesday $16

THE MOULIN BEIGE

Paris is home to The Moulin Rouge but Melbourne prefers her cheeky little sister, The Moulin Beige. The Moulin Beige features vaudeville, variety and stand-up and has been running as a weekly comedy night for the past six months. Hosted by comic accordionist Liz Skitch, special guests so far have included physical comic Daniel Oldaker, contortionist Ruby Rubberlegs, hula-hooping burlesque clown Clara Cupcakes. ventriloquist Sarah Jones, comic legend European Man, absurdist comic The Birdman, stunt clown Johnny Danger and side show legend Shep Huntly.

Venue: The Burlesque Bar, 42 Johnston St, Fitzroy Dates: March 28 – April 19 (Thursdays & Fridays) Times: 8.30pm (Fridays 11pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. $15

DAVID J SUNS OF FRED EXCITED!!!

This show is comedy. This show is music. This show is dance in your face – excited to be here. Woo! Three tough, rugged, handsome young, Aussie men in uniform – what more could you ask for? Starting with a dance move guaranteed to change your life, all the way to belly laughs from the world's slowest punchline you never saw coming.

Venue: Trades Hall – Old Council Chambers, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 – April 7 (except Monday) Times: 7pm (6pm Sundays) Tickets: $20

50 SHADES

You don’t need to have read the book. You don’t need to have been handcuffed naked. The show will join the dots. How many ways are there to explore Fifty Shades of Grey? David J finds a few. Love and bondage come in many different forms. Kicking off with a line from Katrina Lumsden’s review of Fifty Shades of Grey, the show forces the year 2012 to go truly head to head with 1954: bringing unexpected results. Surreal, satirical, sexy, 50 Shades is certainly worth 50 minutes.

Venue: Revolt Melbourne, 12 Elizabeth St, Kensington Dates: April 3 –14 (except Monday) Times: April 3-7 Wednesday - Saturday 7.30pm (Sunday 5.30pm), April 9-14 Tuesday-Saturday 10.30pm (Sunday 8pm) Tickets: Full $23, Conc., Tightarse Tuesday $13, Preview $10

WIN

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CELEBRITY THEATRESPORTS

Celebrating 25 years at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, Celebrity Theatresports pits Australia’s most well-known faces against each other in a no-holdsbarred competition of improvised comedy. Hosted by Impro Melbourne, come and see your favourite celebrities unscripted and hilarious. It’s improvised comedy at its most hair-raising and riotous!

Venue: National Theatre, Cnr Barkly & Carlisle Sts, St Kilda Date: April 20 Time: 7.30pm Tickets: Full $35, Conc. $25, Group $25, Child Under 15 $20

54

DAVE CALLAN THE PSYCHOLOGY OF LAUGHTER

The Psychology of Laughter is a book Dave found during the Edinburgh Fringe. It was written 100 years ago. This show looks at why we laugh and how it has changed in a century.

Venue: Trades Hall - The Meeting Room, Cnr Lygon & Victoria Sts, Carlton Dates: March 28 - April 21 (except Mondays) Times: 9.30pm (Sunday 8.30pm) Tickets: Full $20, Concession $17, Tightarse Tuesday $14, Preview $10

SETLIST

STAND-UP WITHOUT A NET Last year’s late-night hit is back from sold-out shows in Edinburgh, Ireland, Montreal, Austria and London. Top comedians are given a never-before-seen 'set list' of strange and outrageous topics the moment they get onstage to create stand-up on the spot and under pressure. Complete comedy in the moment.

Venues: Victoria Hotel – Vic’s Bar, 215 Lt Collins St, CBD (Tuesday - Sunday) & Melbourne Town Hall – Lower Town Hall, Cnr Swanston & Collins Sts, CBD (Monday) Dates: April 5 – 21 (except Wednesday) Times: 9.45pm (Sunday 8.45pm, Monday 9pm) Tickets: Full $22, Preview $20

, BEAT S COMEDY FESTIVAL GUIDE 2013 BROUGHT TO YOU BY GRAVITY ESPRESSO

9TH ANNUAL DEAKIN COMEDY REVUE SHOULDA COULDA WOULDA

Geoff stuffed up. His life is nowhere near as together as he hoped it would be. One day he finds an old VHS tape of a kid's TV show he doesn't ever remember seeing. When it's characters manifest in his bedroom, it quickly becomes obvious that, had he watched this show when he was younger, he would never have screwed up so badly. Can the combined efforts of Baron Landscape, the Breath of Fresh Air and the Tea Lady get Geoff's life back on track, kid's TVstyle, or is he a deadweight beyond help? This ridiculous musical comedy goes out to anyone who isn't where they hoped they'd be.

Venue: Colonial Hotel, 240 King St, CBD Dates: April 10 – 20 (Wednesday - Saturday) Times: 7pm Tickets: All Tickets $15


WIN

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BRON BATTEN & HER PARENTS SWEET CHILD OF MINE

You may go with the parentals to Melbourne’s comedy festival (family outing = parents paying - winner) but no one in their right mind would actually choose to take them onstage. Come and watch some weird shit happen when Bron decides to combine discussions on avant garde slash contemporary dance slash her career slash art in general, with her parents.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 4 – 12 (except Wednesday) Times: 7pm (Sunday 6pm) Tickets: Full $18, Conc. $16

TOMMY BRADSON POET LAUREATE SWEET SIXTEEN OR THE TELIA NEVILE BIRTHDAY PARTY MASSACRE

Tommy Bradson’s latest performance promises rock’n’roll, booze, potentially blood and hopefully cake. With a backing band non-other than The Thorn Section, with ledge John Thorn on the keys, this sharp-tongued performer will not disappoint. The birthday party could swing either way, it could be sweet, or it could be a massacre, pretty standard really.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 4 – 21 (April 9, 10, 17) Times: 8pm (Sundays 7pm) Tickets: Full $24, Conc. $20, Tightarse Tuesday $18, Group and Preview $15

THE LISTIES

6D,(TWICE AS GOOD AS 3D)

LIVE ON AIR

Telia Nevile brings you a radio show that’s full of word play and funky music. On a scale of heavy metal to bubblegum rock, this poetry-driven composition covers it all. Telia’s distinctive humour brought her nominations for Best Newcomer and Golden Gibbo Awards at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival in 2010.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 4 – 12 (except Wednesday) Times: 9pm (Sunday 8pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc., Group $15, Tightarse Tuesday $12

The Listies’ latest show is promising twice as much entertainment, with six dimensions of fun and a whole lot ‘a stupid. In 2010 they received the Barry Award at Melbourne Comedy Festival and were named Best Kids Comedy at the Edinburgh Fringe by BBC Scotland. Suitable for children, this show is the epitome of being as obnoxiously disgusting as possible, but still keeping it G-rated.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 9 – 13 Times: 11am (Friday - Saturday 11am & 1.30pm) Tickets: All Tickets $22 (Adults at Children Prices), Group $20

WIN

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WIN

ZOE COOMBS MARR DAVE

What’s the deal with pizza? Single with cats? Finding Nemo’s girlfriend. Lesbian totem tennis?! My dad’s a good guy! Sex turducken. Exactly what it looks like.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 6, 13, 20 Time: 11pm Ticket: Full $20, Conc. $17

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CANDY B AND BUSTY BEATZ

,

MC PLATYPUS QUEEN KOALA S HIP HOP JAMBOREE

MC Platypus and Queen Koala’s Hip Hop Jamboree is an interactive music comedy show for primary-aged children that will have them laughing, dancing and singing to beat.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 1 - 14 April Times: 12.30pm Ticket Prices: $15

SABRINA D’ANGELO SLUTMONSTER ER BODY POET AND FRIENDS Sabrina makes poetry with her body. Let it take you on a fantastical journey into The Bizarre. She is fluent in many body languages – think Kate Bush meets Mr Bean. What sweet dreams will emerge from her enchanted bumbag? Body Poet is a magical, tragical, whimsical, flimsical feast for the senses. It combines clowning, facial acrobatics and absurdity to unlock a Pandora’s box of peculiar characters.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 13 – April 21 (except April 17) Times: 9pm (8pm Sundays) Tickets: Full $18, Conc. $15, Group and Tightarse Tuesday $13

Step into the Slutmonster’s psychotically colourful world and witness a spectacle which is utterly, unapologetically depraved…but artfully so. This is a stupidly violent, magically perverse play, which is under the mistaken belief that it’s a light-hearted musical comedy romp.

Venue: Northcote Town Hall, 189 High St, Northcote Dates: April 2 - 20 (Thursday to Saturday & April 3) Times: 10pm Ticket: Full $20, Conc., Group $17, Preview $15.

WIN

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WIN

YON

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& HIS PRISM OF SEXY Y THOUGHTS There will be no threesome jingles this year as Tripod’s Yon is going solo for his new act, And His Prism of Sexy Thoughts. Yon has musicians SJ and Naomune backing him up in this melodious performance about all things sex. Whether it’s rebound sex, dirty sex, pity sex or your average middle-age sex, Yon does it all, and he’ll even let you watch. Co-written and directed by Fiona Scott-Norman this witty cabaret is sure to leave you satisfied.

Venue: The Butterfly Club, 256 Collins St, CBD Dates: April 11 – 20 (Thursday - Saturday) Time: 7pm Ticket Prices: Full $23, Conc. $20, Group $18

SIMON ABRAHAMS AM MS & LACHLAN MACLEOD SATURN RETURNS

Simon and Lachlan bring forth a successful composition of comedy, cosmos and confession to produce twelve original songs that summarise the sobering-up sensation of turning thirty. The show’s name Saturn Returns is derived from the 29.5 years it takes Saturn to orbit the Earth and this phenomenon is discussed in conjunction with life’s astrological influence when everything isn’t quite lining up the way you want it to.

Venue: The Butterfly Club, 256 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 6 (except Monday) Times: 8pm (Thursday - Saturday 9pm) Tickets: Full $25, Con. $20, Group, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $18

WIN

LINCOLN DAW W

Lincoln Daw spent 18 months living, working and travelling through China. From being a kindergarten teacher to 25 mini-Maos, to holding back hordes of queue jumpers at the Shanghai World Expo, Lincoln has seen enough to conclude that China’s ascension to Superpower status is inevitable. Material ranges from intrusive medical checks, the communal atmosphere of going to the bathroom, and the death-defying morning commute. Alongside his personal ruminations, Lincoln also looks at how this capitalistic country is ruled by a communist party and other major contradictions such as the (disturbing) reverence for Chairman Mao.

Venue: Club Voltaire, 14 Raglan St, Nth Melbourne Dates: April 4 – April 14 (except Monday) Times: 7.30pm (Sunday 6.30pm) Tickets: Full $18, Conc. $14 & Tightarse Tuesday $14 and Preview $12

THE BIG HOO-HAA HOO-HAA YOU?

This is improv in its prime. The Big HOO-HAA! invites you to experience raw talent at its best featuring the likes of Claire Hooper, Michala Banas, Tottie Goldsmith, Virginia Gaye, Roz Hammond and Marg Downey to name a few. Add a celebrity guest to each show and you won’t be disappointed. The Big HOO-HAA! Is a perfect combination of storytelling and onthe-spot comic genius.

Venue: The Butterfly Club, 256 Collins St, CBD Dates: March 28 – April 20 (Thursday - Saturday) Times: 10.30pm (April 11 - 20 7pm) Tickets: Full $20, Conc. $16, Group and Preview $15

JASON CHATFIELD STAND-UP COMIC STRIP LIVE

In the tradition of Rolf Harris and Mr Squiggle, Ginger Meggs cartoonist Jason Chatfield brings fun live cartooning and comedy together in a fun new solo show at the Portland Hotel. Drawing live throughout the show, Jason performs stand-up, sketches and musical comedy tying both the visual and comedy elements together with a big surprise reveal at the end.

Venue: Portland Hotel – Locker Room, Cnr Russell & Lt Collins Sts, CBD Dates: April 9 – April 21 (except Monday) Times: 7.15pm (Sundays 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $15, Conc., Group, Preview, Laugh Pack and Tightarse Tuesday $10

WIN

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THE NEXT SUPERPOWER WER

WIN

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KARIN DANGER HOT BOX

Karin knows that everyone has a place where they feel hot. It may be that you’re having a good hair day, you’re feeling particularly fashionable or that little part inside you that says ‘dayyymn girl’ every once in awhile. Directed by Scott Gooding, Hot Box is comically vulgar, encapsulating singing and everything hot. Karin has won many awards from her seven years of bringing hilarious songs to the stage all over the world.

Venue: The Butterfly Club, 256 Collins St, enter Carson Place off Lt Collins St, CBD Dates: April 9 - 21 (except Monday) Times: 8pm (Thursday - Saturday 9pm) Tickets: Full $23, Conc. $20, Group $18

ALL OF THE THINGS!

Do you like things? Great! 'Cause we like things. All of the things! And most of all of the other things too. All of the Things! is an explosive show about everything. It has dancing, jumping and even some talking too. And re-enactments? Well, come find out. Things will definitely happen. Watch two girls in a glitter milkshake (literally) overflowing with ridiculousness and with just the right amount of lactose sweetness. A show full of twisty turns that will leave you satisfied but wanting more, like being best friends with a living Curly Wurly. Yum. "Best thing!!" (Anonymous)

Venue: The Tuxedo Cat, 17-23 Wills Street, CBD Dates: March 27 – April 9 (except April 3) Times: 7.15pm (Sunday 6.15pm) Tickets: Full $15, Tightarse Tuesday and Preview $12

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THE INCREDIBLY SATISFYING ADVENTURES OF MILTON MCAFFREY P.I

It's 1937, and your favourite detective serial The Incredibly Satisfying Adventures of Milton McAffrey P.I. is playing on the wireless, only you get to watch it live and unedited. With the help of his plucky, young investigative assistant, Milton sets off to discover what happened to Morris, how he disappeared, and who the mysterious people are who surround Morris' sudden disappearance.

Venue: Revolt Melbourne, 12 Elizabeth St, Kensington Dates: April 10 – April 20 (except Monday) Times: 9pm (Sunday 7pm) Tickets: Full $22, Conc., Groups $18, Tightarse Tuesdays and Preview $15

55


JOEL CREASEY

JEFF “ONE OF THE GREATS”HERALD SUN

DIRECTED BY JANELLE KOENIG

GREEN

“Utterly brilliant!” 3AW “Wonderful!” THE WEST AUSTRALIAN “A revelation!” ★★★★ THE AGE “No doubt he’ll go a long way” ★★★★ THE HERALD SUN

PORTICO ROOM MELBOURNE TOWN HALL

in n

LEAPING OFF THE BELL CURVE

28 MARCH - 21 APRIL (excl. Mondays)

9.45PM (8.45PM SUNDAYS)

“HANDS DOWN HILARIOUS”

twitter.com/joelcreasey

SYDNEY MORNING HERALD

GREG FLEET

“CATCH JEFF’S VERY FUNNY SHOW AND I GUARANTEE YOU’LL FEEL A WHOLE LOT BETTER FOR IT”

IN

THE BOY WHO CRIED SOBER

LONDON EVENING STANDARD

28 MARCH – 21 APRIL TUES – SUN: 8.15PM (7.15PM SUNDAYS) SWISS CLUB, 89 FLINDERS LANE.

This show revisits the twin themes of love and drug addiction and asks “Just how honest was 10 Years in a Long Sleeve Shirt...?”

“HE SUCCEEDS IN DRAGGING US TO EXTREMES OF LAUGHTER, EMBARRASSMENT AND PITY, BUT MOSTLY LAUGHTER” THE INDEPENDENT, LONDON

28 MARCH – 21 APRIL

TUES – SUN 9.30PM (8.30PM SUNDAYS) COUNCIL CHAMBERS, MELBOURNE TOWN HALL MONDAYS 7.00PM BACKSTAGE ROOM, MELBOURNE TOWN HALL twitter.com/thegregfleet

KEVIN KROPINYERI

MONDAYS 9.30PM SUPPER ROOM, MELBOURNE TOWN HALL.

twitter.com/jeffgreen007

YOUTUBE SUPERSTAR 200 ,000+ SUBSCRIBERS

ALEX

25 MILLION+ VIEWS

WILLIAMSON “ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT PERFORMANCE – GO SEE HIM” RIP IT UP

WELCOME TO MY WORLD

“A cracking performance”HERALD SUN

28 MARCH – 21 APRIL EXCL. MONDAYS

7.15PM (6.15PM SUNDAYS)

MELBOURNE TOWN HALL

JACQUES BARRETT IS

IE

LOOSEST AUSS

THE CONTRARIAN

28 MARCH–21 (excl. APRIL Mondays) NEW BALLROOM, TRADES HALL

Tony Starr’s Kitten Club Level 1, 267 Lt Collins St March 28 - April 20 (Excl Sun & Mon) 9:45pm

“Pretty damn impressive, 4 stars” Time Out

MUSICAL DRUG DEALER

9.30pm (8.30pm Sundays)

@jbcomedy

FULL INFO AND TICKETS AVAILABLE AT

COMEDYFESTIVAL.COM.AU

twitter.com/alexwilliamson8


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