Moving abroad with children may be challenging, but moving abroad with teenagers may add another layer of complexity. How do you prepare your teenager for the start of school in another country? Are there specific challenges related to their ages?
The language spoken at the Internatonal School of Billund is English. She learns Danish too. She will improve her Danish in the years to come – maybe by finding a part tme job in Billund. I am confident that she will learn it.
We have asked Melanie, mother of a 13-year-old girl to share her experiences with us.
Melanie, where did you live before arriving in Billund? Denmark is not our first country of relocaton. My husband is Britsh and I am from Germany. We have lived in London and then in Switzerland for seven years before moving to Denmark two years ago. Our daughter went to a local school in the Italian speaking part of Switzerland and she had to start from scratch, learning a new language, finding new friends, adaptng to a new system. She did very well, but there is no doubt that it was very challenging. How did she react to the idea of starting in a new school in another country? Actually, she was happy about it because we told her that it was an internatonal school (Internatonal School of Billund). She knew she would be among global-minded kids with more or less same experiences and background. Furthermore, she won’t again be the one struggling to utter a word, standing out with an accent – it helps!
What did you do to prepare her for the start of school? We got in contact with other parents from the school during the summer holidays, so she already had a friend before startng school. It is very important, because you don’t make friends in the same way when you are 6 or 7 years old than when you are 13. Your parents are not going to arrange “playdates” for you (and you will probably think it is so embarrassing if they do anyway!). As a teen, making friendships happen is maybe even more crucial, but happens less spontaneously than with younger kids. Maybe there is more at stake. So, having a friend already before the start of school helped a great deal, although I remember she had a week before startng school
when she was quite worried. The challenge ahead of her was a bit too overwhelming. She speculated a lot about what would happen. How did you help her? Because we relocated a few tmes, I think she had a strong need for security. Just, you know, be home and feel safe. I tried to be there for her as much as possible, and I tried not to underestmate the change. It can be tricky with a teen, but I think that it is important to give them as much attenton as possible – even if they sometmes don’t want it. Be there and listen. But you know, as a parent, it is hard to figure out what to do. If you do too much, you rob them of a great opportunity of self-development as well as to grow as a person. And, you really don’t want your kid to get laughed at. If you do too little, they may feel that you don’t care. It is really a challenge to find the fine balance between the two. What will you recommend to other parents in the same situation? I would recommend giving your full support during this challenging period. Take the tme to be with your teen. Talk about the positve outcome of those years in another country, such as being open to new cultures and taking on new challenges. They gain so much from the experience, and it is important to talk about it as not only a challenge, but an opportunity too. The Internatonal School of Billund is doing a great job in creatng opportunites for children to meet each other. You should really prioritze get-together events at the start of the school year, and all the other events such as Christmas partes, etc.
What does your daughter like about school today? I think she really enjoy the teaching methods: learning through play, working with projects and challenges, teamwork, etc. She does many presentatons too, which I think is great. I am convinced that she today develops competences that are highly needed and rewarded at nowadays workplaces.
Thanks for sharing, Melanie!