q
Wednesday—May 8 • Conflict Management What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. James 4:1-2
It was our movie date night. I was eagerly anticipating the spy thriller with explosions and flying body parts but Rose announced her desire to see the new romantic comedy. We had a conflict. Disagreements and conflicts occur because we want control (or want things our way), take each other for granted, feel insecure, have unmet needs, and are stressed. Make it a priority to resolve conflicts because unresolved conflicts stand as a barrier to unity. We need to turn the selffocus into other-focus (Philippians 2:4). Always look for a win-win solution. Seek to see things from the other person’s point of view (Romans 12:18). Resolve conflicts without anger and without letting it fester
q
(Ephesians 4:26) and forgive each other as God forgives you (Matthew 6:14-15). While it may be difficult at times to resolve a conflict, not dealing with it can result in long lasting negative consequences. A happy and successful marriage is not the absence of conflict but rather the commitment to resolution. —Dave & Rose Wertheim Think of a recent conflict you have had with your spouse. What might you have done differently to resolve the conflict in a more godly way? Plan an approach that would help you accomplish that next time. Daily Reading: 1 Samuel 2:22–4:22, John 5:24–47, Psalm 106:1–12, Proverbs 14:30–31
Thursday—May 9 • Improving Sexual Intimacy May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love. Proverbs 5:18-19
When you have a family, finding quality time for sexual intimacy can be a challenge. One evening we planned an intimate encounter. After watching Schindler’s List, I announced, “Ok honey, I’m ready for you.” Rose, bleary eyed after the movie, just stared at me. Ready for an intimate moment after the emotional wreck experiences of death and cruelty? We had time planned, but now? Really? Sexual intimacy between a husband and wife is a reflection of a couple’s oneness, but God also created us differently and we need to understand and accept our differences. Women are relational, emotional, and need more words, touching, and affection. Men are physical, visual, quick to be excited, and don’t need to be “in the mood.” Try to out-please each other. Become a student of your spouse.
Remember the commitments you made to each other for an everlasting marriage. Many men complain that they are desirous of more frequent sexual intimacy than their spouse. While there are no guarantees, the best way to encourage one-ness and stimulate desire in your spouse is to court her, love her, appreciate her, and out-please her at every opportunity. This can help you develop a mutually agreed upon frequency. —Dave & Rose Wertheim What one thing could you do today for your wife that would demonstrate love, care, concern, and emotional connectedness? Are you willing to out-please your wife? Daily Reading: 1 Samuel 5:1–7:17, John 6:1–21, Psalm 106:13–31, Proverbs 14:32–33
35