q
Monday—May 6 • Biblical Answers for Your Marriage . . . I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10, nasb
How many of you have been tripped up by the trick question, “Honey, does this dress make me look fat?” If you’ve experienced this, you know that women are complicated. My wife, Rose, and I are sharing our experiences to help you live an abundant life in Christ through your marriage. I have bungled this question more than once and have learned that there’s a story behind the story. Rose knows exactly how she looks in an outfit. The question really is, “Am I still attractive to you?” We didn’t have strong role models of healthy marriage to learn from. Not surprisingly, we made a lot of mistakes. The good news is that your history does not
q
need to dictate your destiny. God transformed our hearts, we changed, and He has provided abundant joy. He can do the same for you! It’s been said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” The Bible has the answers to living the abundant life and the power to transform your heart from the inside out. —Dave & Rose Wertheim What would your wife say is the one thing you could change that would most clearly demonstrate your desire to be a godly husband? Are you willing to do it? Daily Reading: Ruth 2:1–4:22, John 4:43–54, Psalm 105:16–36, Proverbs 14:26–27
Tuesday—May 7 • Listening and Understanding
My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:19-20 The ritual of sitting in the hot tub has been our special alone time together. One time, after Rose shared a difficult situation, I immediately began the solution consultation. She sadly looked at me and said, “I just wanted you to listen.” Like many men, problem solving is what I do for a living and doing it at home seemed natural. But that’s not what Rose wanted or needed at the time. What she needed was my attention, compassion, friendship, and support. Good communication involves listening to your spouse. Listening means wanting to understand what the other person is feeling and thinking. The goal is to discover how
34
your spouse perceives a situation and how she feels. In The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey states, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” Words are a key to the other person’s heart. As God has transformed my heart I have a new model to follow, “Listen, don’t solve.” —Dave & Rose Wertheim How often have you appeared to be listening to your spouse and quickly devolved into solving rather than listening intently to understand? Share your thoughts with another man. Daily Reading: 1 Samuel 1:1–2:21, John 5:1–23, Psalm 105:37–45, Proverbs 14:28–29