September 19 Can’t remember anything. Had trouble sleeping. The repair man returned and spent a lot of time lying on his back with his head up the fire. He was wearing dirty bottle green trousers and a slightly cleaner overcoat that lay open to reveal a multitude of pens and pads. His spanner kept clanging and dropping out of his hands. He seemed to be trying to loosen something. I spent a lot of time watching how his knees waved and his feet shuffled around as he worked. Now and again his whole body would twitch as the spanner slipped and there was an echoey bang. The man sat cross legged on the carpet, breathing hard and looking into the fire. It’s still not safe, he said. I can’t get the bastard off.
September 20 I thought about her for the first time in a long while. I felt sad.
September 23 I’m staring through double glazed windows into a cold, drizzly night. There is someone talking behind me, telling me the glass is about to explode. I try to pull away from the window but my hands are stuck flat on the glass. I wake up just as my skin begins to peel. I think he came back. I don’t know why I didn’t answer the door. Did I miss a day?