has become a central part of the creative
echoes through my own experience of
narrative of the journey of our duet. It
teaching and training others. My position
reiterates our relationship and nods to the
as a disabled dancer means that I offer a
different spaces we have worked in and
unique perspective within a wider dance
the support we have received. It is proof
context, which has informed my self-
of our research and our interrogation.
perception as a person with knowledge
All these factors strengthen my sense of
and experience in a particular area.
the work as ‘mine’ and consequently my feelings of leadership and autonomy.
The feeling of responsibility did not extend to a view of myself as a leader. At least I did not feel that other people
‘A LACK OF ROLE MODELS IMPACTS NOT
would perceive me as leader material. In dance, there are limited examples
JUST ON DISABLED PEOPLE IN DANCE,
of disabled dance artists as leaders. A lack of role models impacts not just on
IT ALSO INFORMS THE PERCEPTION OF
disabled people in dance, but it also informs the perception of non-disabled
NON-DISABLED PEOPLE IN DANCE.’
people in dance. Disabled role models serve a dual purpose. They present potential leadership to aspiring disabled
The cumulative process of applying for
dancers. In addition, they demonstrate
funds, researching, choreographing and
to the art form overall that leadership is
dancing in the live and filmed elements
not restricted to non-disabled people in
of my collaboration with O’Brien could
dance. This has informed the dichotomy
be perceived as a journey into leadership.
of my own leadership. At times, I feel
I have trained and worked in dance for
like a leader. I pursue my practice with a
over two decades. During this time, I
determination to lead and be autonomous
have performed, taught and taken part in
in my dance endeavours. Conversely, I am
discussions and symposia across a range
often confronted with a sense of self-doubt
of contexts. On paper I have been ‘doing’
when I am the only disabled person in a
leadership. In philosophical terms, however,
room, university, studio or theatre. The
I have not perceived myself to be a leader.
societal narrative of managing rather than
As O’Brien suggests in my discussions
succeeding or excelling that I have felt
with her, in the act of teaching she can
defined by reminds me of my perceived
feel like she is ‘in charge’. This feeling
place, thereby raising an interesting issue
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