RE-VERSE

About the poet: Originally from Karnataka, South India, Sudha Rao (see Cap #84) migrated to Dunedin with her parents and trained in classical South Indian dance. She moved to Wellington to establish Dance Aotearoa New Zealand (DANZ). In 2017, Sudha completed her Master’s in Creative Writing at the International Institute of Modern Letters. On Elephant’s Shoulders is her first collection.

In brief: This poem, along with two others in Sudha’s collection, was originally commissioned to accompany an exhibition of portraits of migrant women of colour by Auckland-based photographer Abhi Chinniah. In keeping with the title of the exhibition, A Migrant’s Path, this poem describes, with evocative imagery, the lived experience of a migrant moving across borders and waters.

Why I like it: “Migrant” is a potent poem made up of seven rhyming couplets, each presenting a different perspective on the migrant experience, from the decision to leave to the moment feet touch upon new soil. In between are sobering snapshots that emphasise the reality of risking your life for safety in a new land (“sleeping on sand, burying sirens”). This peril is reinforced by the repetition of ‘as a migrant’ to end each couplet, which may also comment on the way “migrant” can be a loaded descriptor in different social and political contexts. The poem suggests that there are battles that continue long after arrival, with migrant stories and lives rendered “semi-transparent” or reduced to “a pigment”. Despite the lurking claustrophobia throughout the poem that threatens to consume the speaker (“my sky withers”), it does end on a hopeful note.

Read more like this: Although the topic of migration is threaded through the history of Aotearoa’s poetry and literature, there are some notable absences from the kinds of voices published. However, collections and anthologies like More of Us (Landing Press) and A Clear Dawn (Auckland University Press) have featured stirring work by writers from diverse migrant backgrounds who have made Aotearoa their home.

INTRODUCED BY CHRIS TSE

MIGRANT

This is not a place for a wild hunt. By grant of a native wind my sky withers, as a migrant.

I, seeking not favor, an aspirant, a blue moon, flee a torrent, as a migrant.

My breath forms prayer beads of advisements. Under cover of darkness, I become a consignment, as a migrant.

On a hunt carrying dreams, I am fragrant with enticement and frightened, as a migrant.

What can I see? A wide front of sea, compliant, sleeping on sand, burying sirens, as a migrant.

By current I fly as time makes me a pigment likened to dark or light, as a migrant.

Light must, like fine dust, make me semi-transparent. At this seafront, regnant Dhasu runs, as a migrant.

Reverse By Sudha Rao From On Elephant’s Shoulders (The Cuba Press, 2022)

Rook star

PHOTOGRAPHY BY MATILDA BOESE-WONG

Xanthe Rook talks to Sarah Lang about spiritual rituals, mental health, living in a notorious Wellington flat, and becoming an archivist.

When Xanthe Rook, 23, was growing up in West Auckland, she was interested in the occult. “My grandmother encouraged me to have a relationship with fairies and angels – and from there I became interested in other forms of mysticism, witchcraft and ritual. My mother already had books on the subject. The way I make sense of the world is naturally through patterns, signs and intuition, though I mostly keep this all very private. Through university, I brought this world of mine into the academic sphere.” She did a BA in history and religious studies, with interests in occult history and women’s spirituality – initially at the University of Auckland, then transferring to Victoria University of Wellington.

Xanthe began an honours year in religious studies. She dropped out, but would like to eventually write a dissertation. Her studies focused on women’s spiritual/ ritual circles in New Zealand, including a feminist Catholic ritual circle her grandmother belonged to, dedicated to German mystic and composer Hildegard of Bingen. She wanted to compare this group with ritual circles formed by the younger generation. “I’ve always found ritual an interesting thing, especially as a pillar that binds together so much difference.”

Xanthe acknowledges that this academic, analytical treatment of her spirituality changed it: “I’m still trying to figure out how it’s going to look and operate in my life now. I don’t think I could ever rid myself of it though. It feels like the faith of my inner child.”

She says there’s a gap in research on spiritual freedom of choice, perhaps because in recent times it has come to be taken for granted. “People have an autonomy in their practice of spirituality that didn’t really exist 30 years ago. And New Zealand is an interesting melting pot as a case study.”

Xanthe grew up in West Auckland with her brother, ophthalmologist father, and high-school music teacher mother. She played clarinet, piano, bass and drums, and largely taught herself singing and guitar.

She played in various bands (mostly on drums) during high school, and was deemed to be a good “girl drummer” or “good at drumming for a girl”. In the band “Courtney Hate” she performed at the Silver Scroll Awards in 2016. “Growing up as a female musician, and going to gigs, I saw minimal representation of women and queer people onstage.”

Xanthe identifies as queer, and in recent years more as nonbinary/femme than as a woman; “But I still associate a lot with a woman’s social experience, especially as a woman musician.”

“I think I probably always knew”, says Xanthe, but says she has become “more comfortable being queer in the past few years,” since she started being around more queer people. “I never felt I had to ‘come out’ because I never felt rigidly forced into any box to begin with. I understand that this experience is quite different for a lot of people. For me, it was an eventual acknowledgement that I didn’t always associate heavily with being very feminine, and didn’t always respond positively when treated that way.”

Xanthe took the train to Wellington in 2019, with two suitcases. “I wanted to move somewhere where I didn’t really know anyone – and where I could plant myself.” She was already friendly, however, with drummer Josh Finegan and guitarist/vocalist Christian Dimick.

Josh, Christian and Xanthe began writing songs together, and got a Sunday-night slot performing at the Pyramid Club.” They sought to expand the band, “with other women/queer people who had a similar kaupapa.” The lineup solidified into seven-member band Recitals. Xanthe sings and plays bass, with Josh on drums and Christian on guitar/vocals. The other members are Tharushi Bowatte (trumpet), Carla Camilleri (keys/vocals), Olivia Wilding (cello), and Sam Curtiss (guitar). Recitals’ genre-bending music has been described as “chamber pop.”

It was no mean feat to form a band, record an album, and get signed by a major record label during a pandemic – “a very strange, and disorderly time to be alive”. Recorded in various studios and bedrooms, Recitals’ first album Orbit I was released by Flying Nun in August, on vinyl LP and in digital formats.

Xanthe lived briefly at 13 Garrett Street, the three-storey concrete Morrisons’ Building beside Glover Park. “It’s a crazy old former printing-press building which had [hosted] lots of gigs and huge parties. It was a flat for 30 years. When I moved in, 11 people lived there. It was extremely, and at times overwhelmingly, social. I couldn’t do something like that again, but I’m really glad I did it.”

The building was sold, and Xanthe moved flats just before the first lockdown. In the solitude of lockdowns, she came to understand that she was more introverted than she had previously believed.

Xanthe had dealt with mental-health issues for many years. Now various pressures “compounded into this crushing force and I had a breakdown”. She realised she habitually felt she was “not good enough”. “I felt I should do more, be more productive, be a better and kinder person, help more people, achieve better things.” While the breakdown was “terrifying”, it also had its benefits. “It was like a bushfire burned everything down and I had to start again and try to find some sort of love for myself.”

She also found a career, developing an interest in heritage collections, and the moral considerations related to dealing with taonga. She’s now a collections archivist at Ngā Taonga Sound & Vision.

As a child she had fantasised about archaeology, “religiously” watching Egyptian-history VHS tapes, and idolising Indiana Jones. “My interest in magic and occult stuff fused with archaeology in my mind. History became this mysterious magical thing.”

At Ngā Taonga, she is working on Utaina, a digital-preservation collaboration between Ngā Taonga, Archives NZ, and the National Library. The project is digitising Crownowned audio-visual content (particularly Ngā Taonga’s TVNZ collection) stored on magnetic media from the 1960s to the early 2000s. Think oral histories, music recordings, broadcast news, recordings of community events.

These items are physically deteriorating, and the playback technology needed for magnetic media is obsolescent. “There’s this rush against time,” Xanthe says. An external agency digitises the material, while “we deal with it at either end.”

Xanthe is considering postgraduate studies in conserving heritage and cultural materials. But she’ll always play music too. “It’s nice having the two paths, and maybe at some point I’ll swap one out for a bit.” She’s in no rush.

My brother and family in New York sent Pinsy the giraffe (we gave our four-year-old niece Elara naming rights). He’s such a feature, and we love how he’s always watching over the room.

Nicola Provost and her partner Reuben Morrison are enjoying their first months of parenthood. Baby Fox (named after Nicola’s grandmother, whose maiden name was Fox) has already been deservedly spoilt, and is settling into her recently renovated nursery.

When Nicola and Reuben bought their home in 2018, it was just “blank canvas sun trap, with a lift.” It’s since been filled with auction finds, travel mementos, family heirlooms and all the accessories that come with a baby. The home’s Miramar location is close to Reuben’s work as director of Lux de Lux Ltd, a company which provides lighting for feature films. Nicola is currently on maternity leave from her role as Zambesi store manager, although she’s excited to be gearing up for this year’s World of WearableArt where she will be a model. Both her parents and Reuben are on hand for baby-sitting duty through the fittings, rehearsals, and performances. Redecorating the spare room was really fun. We painted the walls and roof “Greenhouse” by Resene. It’s a very calming colour, and I often find myself staring at a roof during middleof-the-night feeds. When Fox was first born we had lots of parties with family and friends and we all gravitated to the nursery. It’s such a nice space to be in.

The lamp is the newest addition to the lounge, arriving when I was in labour. It’s from Webb’s auction house. Auctions are definitely one of my addictions; I can often be found in the nursery feeding Fox and scrolling through catalogues. The black chairs are from Babelogue. I had seen them online, and then visited the Auckland store – I just couldn’t get them out of my mind. They’re 1970s Arkana, made in Great Britain. The photographs are by Wellington photographer Harry Culy. We bought the white one at an exhibition, and always regretted not having the black. I was lucky enough to purchase a black one after Harry’s exhibition at City Gallery.

Fox was very spoilt, and was gifted a custommade baby blanket. Inspired by the winter 2022 Zambesi collection, it’s striped and made with pure merino wool. It’s the perfect size for her cot, and also accompanies us on walks.

At our baby shower we asked guests to contribute to a baby account, and the money went towards buying the beautiful Boori Eden cot. As well as being used a lot for the obvious, our Mocka change table is also a great storage space. The green crates from Hay are amazing for keeping nappies and wipes. We’ve learnt pretty quickly that the change mat cover spends just as much time in the wash as it does protecting the mat.

All the books in Fox’s little library have come from friends and family. Green Eggs and Ham is her current favourite.

Everyone told us we’d need a chair with a stool – and they were right. You’ll find us here every three to four hours feeding. Eventually it will relocate to the record room as a listening chair.

The Hatch night light is incredible; it plays white noise, changes to various colours, and shows the time. It’s all operated by an app which is really handy when feeding. Growing up we both loved Animalia by Graeme Base, and we still love the illustrations. It was the inspiration for the nursery, and being the year of the Tiger we thought Fox would be right at home in her jungle. The animal mobile was a gift from Grandma and Grandad. It’s handmade with felted wool by Tik Tak Design Co. Quite often I find Fox lying in her cot, chatting away to the creatures.

The drinks cabinet in the dining room belonged to my Nana and Poppa. The warrior on top was a birthday present I bought Reuben, from The Asian Gallery that was once in Kilbirnie. The plate is from Turkey, and the stamp and ink are from China. The rat artwork is a pointillist piece that we picked up from a Nelson market. My wardrobe is my favourite room in the house. The biker jacket is one of my most loved pieces. It’s leather with beaver fur sleeves, by designer Rick Owens. It has accompanied me to a lot of parties, and is always first in my suitcase for winter holidays.