no distractions or interruptions. If you are going to discuss something that has been a recurring problem or is a big problem to you, make sure that you are not tired, stressed, hungry or in a hurry and take time to pray and commit the discussion to God (remember that He is the third cord which makes your marriage unbreakable, so He must be included), Praying should also help to shift your focus from the problem to the Problem-solver and should help you to keep your emotions and your attitude in check. The attitude with which you approach the problem is very important – a positive attitude will have a positive influence on your spouse. Husbands, remember that your wife is “the weaker vessel” (1 Pet 3:7), so don’t be domineering or belittle her. Give her time to talk and ask the right questions to draw her out. The most important thing here is to treat each other with great respect (Eph 5:21 & 5:33) which is something that is often missing in marriages today. Empathy should breed respect because identifying with your spouse should 16
give you compassion for him/her and help you to understand what it is like to be in that position. Empathy is not a problem-solving exercise – rather it is exercising your imagination to try to identify with your spouse in a particular situation. It should bring you to a place where you and your spouse can identify with one another and understand what is motivating the other. All humans have the same basic emotional needs - these are:
“Verbally supporting your spouse and encouraging them in everything they do”
Brides Essence.com - Issue 21 For your perfect wedding