Brides Essence Issue 20 Jul-Aug 2015

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to rely on having “that loving feeling” all the time. The important thing is to decide that you will nurture love for your spouse – no matter what. The problem with many relationships is that each person has expectations of their spouse (many of which are never verbalized at all) and when their expectations are not met, they begin to keep score and they show love according to their spouse’s performance in meeting their expectations. This is conditional love. If you think “Well he doesn’t deserve a delicious home-cooked meal because he didn’t wash my car”, you are not loving unconditionally. Marriage was instituted by God for the benefit of both parties and the kind of love He expects us to demonstrate in this covenant union is unconditional love which is also a sacrificial love – a love that makes our partner’s happiness and wellbeing more important than your own.

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Brides Essence.com - Issue 20

WORK AT COMMUNICATING Communication is vital to a fulfilling relationship. You need to make an effort to communicate with one another because there are so many distractions that draw us away from real heart to heart talking nowadays. If at all possible, make a date with one another at least once a week where you have at least an hour to concentrate on talking to each other looking into each other’s eyes. This means NO other distractions like television, computer games, smart phones, etc. The proliferation of electronic devices has fooled us into thinking that we are spending time together, when actually we are not paying any attention to one another while we watch TV/play a game/message someone on our smartphone, etc. A large component of communication is being willing to LISTEN to one another. Often when you are “communicating”, while your


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