debate issue 17, 2010

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issue 17 2010 i

bumper letters section

whose democracy is it anyway?

issue 17 AUG 2010

freedom campers debate

recipes, gym tips & more 1


SKIN & BEAUTY TREATMENT - LEVEL 2

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21-25 Elliott Street, Auckland • Ph: 09 375 4960 • www.atriumonelliott.co.nz


on the cover Illustration by Tamsyn Solomon

editor Samantha McQueen samantha.mcqueen@aut.ac.nz

printer PMP Print Ltd.

designer Nonavee Dale nonavee.dale@aut.ac.nz

all rights reserved This publication is entitled to the full protection given by the Copyright Act 1994 (“the Act”) to the holders of the copyright, being AUCKLAND STUDENT MOVEMENT AT AUCKLAND UNIVERSITY OF TECHNOLOGY INCORPORATED (“AuSM”). Reproduction, storage or display of any part of this publication by any process, electronic or otherwise (except for the educational purposes specified in the Act) without express permission is a break of the copyright of the publisher and will be prosecuted accordingly. Inquiries seeking permission to reproduce should be addressed to AuSM.

sub editor Jared Van Huenen contributors Lisa Arthur | Mike Atkins | Jo Barker | Paul Belli |Nureete Burnie | Kate Campbell | Alicia Crocket | Briar Douglas | Vinny Francesco | Tenani French | Frances Gordon | Celeste Gorrell Anstiss | Sia Handjani | Benjamin Hope | In Unison | Elana Kluner | Andrew Judd | Rocky Mak | Scott Moyes | Heather Rutherford | Catherine Selfe | Mystery Shopper | Tamsyn Solomon | Shounak Vikkar advertising contact Kate Campbell kate.campbell@aut.ac.nz publisher AuSM – Auckland Student Movement @ AUT (Inc.)

disclaimer Material contained in this publication does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of AuSM, its advertisers, contributors, PMP Print or its subsidiaries. DEBATE IS A MEMBER OF:

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AuSM Gig Guide Editorial Letter Letters/Wordfind Creative Corner News Recipes Sport Prez Sez / AuSM Update Freedom Campers Debate How To / Gym Tips Shittycity Whose Democracy Is It Anyway? North Korea Running Routes Bikram Yoga Fit & Fun / Fruitarianism Quiz Top 10 Bus Annoyances Hipsters / Cantopop Columns Agony Aunt / Website of the Week Suggestions / Horoscopes Fashion What Are You Wearing / Retail Review 30 Reviews 33 Spot the Difference 34 Micro-celebs

• 10% permanent student discount* • We buy and sell second-hand textbooks* - instant cash if you sell • Over 100,000 books in stock* - no waiting weeks for books to arrive • Four stores Auckland wide • Open Monday to Friday or buy securely from our website 24/7

www.ubsbooks.co.nz issue 17 AUG 2010

City Campus Phone 366 4550 Fax 366 4570 Email aut.city@ubsbooks.co.nz

Akoranga Campus Phone 489 6105 Fax 489 7453 Email aut.akoranga@ubsbooks.co.nz 3


BOXFIT

every thursday morning

7:45 - 8: 45 AM student lounge

Mon 9 August Free Feed: Sausage or falafel on bread Manukau Campus 12pm Social Dodgeball Manukau Campus 12-2pm Tues 10 August Free Feed: Macaroni and cheese North Shore Campus 12pm NZ Uni Snow Games Entries close today! Futsal Champs North Shore Sport & Fitness Centre AuSM Netball Social League North Shore Sport & Fitness Centre Social Basketball game Manukau Campus 2-4pm Pub Quiz Vesbar 6pm

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Wed 11 August Fish + Chip meal deal Vesbar all day Free Zumba Class City Campus WC202 5:30-6:30pm Thur 12 August Boxfit Classes (free for all) City Campus WC202 7:45-8:45am Free Feed: Macaroni and cheese City Campus 12pm Free Zumba Class City Campus WC202 12-1pm Social Touch Manukau Campus 2-4pm

Aut City campus

Fri 13 August Thank God it’s Friday DJ and drink specials Vesbar 5.30pm AuSM Executive Elections Nominations close today! Inter Tertiary League Trust Stadium 3pm Coming up…. Kick Ass! “Heroes & Villains” DVD release party Coming up late August @ Vesbar


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ast year, it was unveiled that New Zealand was the third fattest nation in the world, behind America and Mexico. Sadly, this doesn’t surprise me. We have competitions in New Zealand to discover the country’s best pie, and it is broadcast across national media (the winner, by the way, was Pat’s Pies). If you walk down Queen St at peak lunch hour, you are bombarded with McDonalds, Burger King, Dunkin Donuts and greasy lards of fat disguising themselves as fried chicken. We’d rather spend hours in peak hour traffic, complaining about the transport system, than pounding the pavement to the nearest bus stop, or throwing our jubbly bits onto a bike. We have been taking notes from our American friends, who have an obesity rate of 34.3 per cent. To be honest, I’m surprised our supermarket aisles haven’t been infiltrated with pop tarts, Twinkies and soft drink that is sold by the gallon. Who wouldn’t want to start the day with a hot fudge sundae flavoured pop tart? If you were to look at your eating and exercising habits right now, how healthy would you be? Do you walk to university every day, or if that’s not possible, jump off the bus a few stops earlier to get in your daily exercise? Does your dinner plate look like a leafy green forest most days of the week? Can you touch your toes without breaking into a sweat? Now, I’m not going to lie about how fit and healthy I am because frankly, I’m sure someone could easily catch me out. My exercise regime consists of walking an easy 20 minutes to work each day, which I’m sure is counteracted by the hours of television or movies I watch in a week. I’m friends with my vegetables (broccoli is my favourite) but I’m BFFs with a chocolate bar or a handful of gummi bears. My last remaining $10 would probably not go towards a salad, but rather a chicken burger from Burger Fuel (which I believe is way healthy than McDonalds). I can no longer touch my toes. Now, I’m not proud of my current lifestyle. Like most, I have paraded around 100 excuses as to why I’m not living a healthy lifestyle: cooking for one is depressing, I can’t afford a gym membership, I have no one to Zumba with each week, I don’t own running shorts, my broccoli goes off before I have the chance to use it… the list goes on. But I am making baby steps towards getting healthier. I’ve started trawling through Trademe looking for a decent priced exercycle for me to use while watching TV. If I cycled even half the amount of time I spent watching time, I could kick Lance’s ass at the Tour de France. I’m saving a few dollars each week to go towards a gym membership for next year (it’s already my 2011 new year’s resolution) and next year I’ll be flatting in a shared cooking environment, which means I can be chummy with broccoli again, along with the rest of his healthy gang. If my lifestyle rings familiar bells to you, join me in making tiny changes, which will hopefully make a world of difference. Get off one stop earlier on the bus ride home twice a week, or park your car in a fringe suburb like Parnell or Ponsonby and walk into uni. Always have a drink bottle of water on hand – often those cravings you think you’re having is just dehydration – and next time, dip carrots or celery into that sundried tomato hummus. Remember, bikini season is coming.

RECEPTION City Campus Level 2, WC Building 921 9805 8am-5 pm Mon-Thurs 8am-3.30pm Fri North Shore Campus Level 2, AS Building 921 9949 8.30am-3pm Mon-Fri Manukau Campus MB107 921 9999 ext 6672 9am-3:30pm Mon-Thurs MANAGEMENT Sue Higgins General Manager 921 9999 ext 5111 sue.higgins@aut.ac.nz REPRESENTATION Veronica Ng Lam AuSM Student President 921 9999 ext 8571 vnglam@aut.ac.nz ADVOCACY Nick Buckby Liaison Manager 921 9999 ext 8379 nick.buckby@aut.ac.nz MARKETING Rebecca Williams Marketing Manager 921 9999 ext 8909 rebecca.williams@aut.ac.nz EVENTS Barry Smith Events Team Leader 921 9999 ext 8931 barry.smith@aut.ac.nz MEDIA Samantha McQueen Publications Co-ordinator 921 9999 ext 8774 samantha.mcqueen@aut.ac.nz SPORTS Melita Martorana Sports Team Leader 921 9999 ext 7259 melita.martorana@aut.ac.nz VESBAR Zane Chase Vesbar Manager 921 9999 ext 8378 zane.chase@aut.ac.nz

For a full list of contact details plus profiles of AuSM staff and student executive visit: www.ausm.org.nz issue 17 AUG 2010

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LETTER OF THE WEEK Nostalgia’d hard. Loved the 90’s issue. It really reminded me of a time when people could be fucked doing stuff. Meaningful stuff. People don’t seem to do that anymore. And christ fuck is it annoying. I mean really people, how hard is it to write 250 words or less, when you EASILY use over 400 words in a single status update, then spend hours editing out fullstops and spaces to get it under to let people know the guy next to you smells funny? And gamers, is it so difficult to meet people “IRL” for a meetup at an arcade? Do you even remember how much more enjoyable it was when you bothered to go out to game with friends? And people in clubs it’s not a club if there’s one person at the meeting. It’s a disgrace. You join clubs to meet people with similar interests, and yet the only thing we seem to share is a lack of interest. But there’s no club for that. If you find yourselves complaining that there’s nothing to do, then go grab some friends and hit the arcades. Or actually participate in your club, because chances are the rest are bored as hell too, and would leap at the chance. Or, contribute to debate. It’s not hard. Look, I just did it. While posting on club forums about hitting the arcades. Nice. Who knows? Maybe you’ll encourage hundreds of people to join you in saying Fuck this, let’s go do something AWESOME. Alex S. Dear 2 annoying females, I know this isn’t a name and shame kinda game but I just need to point out 2 girls that need to be bought to attention. To the girl in Pop Culture tutorial on a Thursday, it really isn’t a good idea to talk all the way through the lesson and then to talk back to the tutor when told to be quiet. Go back to high school you fresher. And to the other girl in Media Com on a Wednesday, seriously shut the hell up, let other people answer the questions and stop putting your 2 cents into every single statement the tute says. That is all. Love Jimmy Hey Sam and Debate. Sucks to hear you didn’t get any letters last week :(. But this issue (the 90’s one) was great. I now want to be 8 again and be learning how to write and read. How to calculate simple math and my times tables. But unfortunatly Im at uni, putting in the hard yards on the way to my business degree. Just also wanted to mention how awesome I think debate it and keep up the good work :). From Kelsey. Dear Debate. What’s so good about a Mondays you may ask yourself...It’s the first day of the week. You have not yet fully recovered from the crazy mad weekend down at the ski fields of Mt Ruapehu. You lost your I-phone at the Powderkeg in Ohakune and it had like all your whole life on it. You turned up for class this morning only to find that the file on the disc that you had hastily copied your assignment onto late on Friday night before heading off to the party

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was the wrong file and now your assignment is 2 weeks overdue...and you ask yourself again...what’s so good about Mondays? Well, the clever buggars at Manakau Campus switched the free feed day from Thursday to Monday...good on ya AuSM! Sean Dear users of the aut tower student lounge, Please refrain from posing all over the couches where people who actually need them to study or relax for 5 minutes before their next lecture. It is inconvenient, annoying as hell and extremely stupid in my honest opinion. I do not enjoy being subject to the possibility of being in the background of your ridiculous facebook photos also, which you seem to think should be taken in this area. Yes, the area is for everyone to enjoy and hang out in but that also entitles everyone to a share of the couches and when you’re sitting there taking 50 pictures of yourselves, not many others get to enjoy it. Sharing is caring, your fellow couch lover. Dearest Debate, It’s awesome that AuSM (no pun) provides free feeds every week. I was just wondering how students (like me) with classes on at the time of the feeds actually have a chance at getting the lunches. I start class at 12 (which is when the feed start), and by 2, when I finish, the stalls are completely wiped out. Any chance hungry Jacks like us can take advantage of this awesome AuSM offer? Sincerely, WasThinkingof SkippingThursday Classes Response from AuSM: While we always do our best to make AuSM events accessible to all AUT students, unfortunately, some students will miss out because of classes/study/work or other engagements. However, the timetable for Semester 2 has been changed so that all classes before 12pm finish 10 minutes before the hour and all classes after 12pm will start at 10 minutes past the hour. This 20 minute break should allow time for you to get to the front of the line nice and early, before making your way to your next class. Dear Debate I’ve realised that no one has been writing to you lately so thought to my self okay its my turn to shine.OMG i am a debate freak!!!. I love the debate magazine and I have collected all the issues so far.I can’t go to bed without reading it. Its like my new bible(Sorry God). I love this magazine because it keeps me updated with all the events that is happening around uni.It’s just a shame that students dont really take much notice of it,but Sam you keep doing your thing, the debate team you guys rock< I love you debate! From Debate Freak.!!! Hey Sam, I read about your lack of letters and decided to vent my frustration regarding the new bus services up and down Mt Eden Road... Before this semester started I was excited to see

the new service and frequent buses but ... I have had to wait up to half an hour for the bus! (making me late my my first class of the semester) and on the way home I have had to wait while four full buses go past before one has enough room for more passengers. Anyway I think they should have more buses on during busier times or something to solve this problem. ((It’s driving me crazy!)No Pun intended :P) Hey debate, I was quite surprised when i read that there were no letters sent in at all last week! So here I am enlightening the horde with my 2 cents... As a 90’s kid I was greatly looking forward to this 90s issue. And with all the talk of the Spice Girls and the Lion King, Sailor Moon, Pokemon games, Georgie Pie (who also had wayy better kids toys than mcds) etc it really got me thinking...we grew up in such a great decade!! Kids these days are stuck with shows like Hannah Montana, the Erin Simpson show and Spongebob (no complaints there though!) Sucks ae. Anyways, just wanted to say I loved the 90s list you included...I am proud to say I could tick off most of them. And also a shout out to Jared: your articles always make me laugh and I must say, your side of the debate in macs vs pcs deserved a massive high five. Keep up the good work debate! Amy I looooooove Clueless, my friend and I used to pretend we were Cher and Dionne, talking to each other on our (toy) cellphones and driving our ‘Jeeps’ (a bunch of chairs..) with our mini backpacks while talking about being held up at gun point and calling people “full-on Monets”! I didn’t even get half of the sex/drug innuendos til I went back and watched it in high school! I hope they don’t do a remake, but if they did, they only solution would be the original cast from the movie (RIP Brittany Murphy), they haven’t aged at all - esp Stacey Dash, and she was like 30 when they made it. It was already a re-telling of Emma, I say leave it alone. Plus, the TV series was awful. Every decade has their own makeover/coming of age high school film. We had Mean Girls in the 2000s(?) and that shouldn’t be re-made either. I’m waiting for the Saved By The Bell Reunion with the help of Jimmy Fallon! Loved this weeks 90s issue :) Always look forward to reading Debate each week. Nat Yeah, after reading this week’s Debate, made me want to live to Nirvana. Thanks for getting me back into listening to good music, in which all you had to be was “angry”. 90`s rocked, unlike the stuff done now-a-days. Hopefully you guys will do a 80`s edition. Well, thanks for letting me reminisce on a decade I can remember well anyway. Btw, you don`t have to be crazy to talk to yourself. -TobyK


Dear Business faculty administrators: This is a letter in regards to the change to start times for business classes. If it is an attempt to reduce the number of late students that come to classes (I’m not sure that this is the reason for it; I’m just guessing), it is in my opinion, a futile attempt. As soon as students get used to the new start times or realize that the start times have actually changed, they will simply turn up even later. I know that this is what I’ve already unintentionally started doing. Being unpunctual is just a natural, unavoidable trait of many university students. I believe that it would make much more sense to change the class end times. That way, I wouldn’t always miss my bus. Fingers crossed that no one else sends in a letter again this week. That way I can win those movie tickets by default! Barrett P.S. To Debate: Thanks for adding the weekly word find. It keeps me entertained while I have to wait for the later bus.

healthy running fat weight muscle

Dear Debate, lol you talked to yourself I repeat to you the response I received when I, also spurned by a lack of interaction, began talking to a friend on MSN. My friend wasnt being as disagreeable as usual. In fact, he seemed to be absorbing my every word as though they were each delivered in a sermon. Not actually. AFK would be a better description of his state. Well, maybe he could have been watching Mean Girls or playing Hello Kitty Island Adventure, blithely unaware of the poignant questions being raised on the merits of the current education system. It was a serious monologue, alright! Big deal. The point is that it clearly wasnt talking to myself. Clearly. Would the Romans have jeered at Antony when he said, Come I to speak in Caesar’s funeral? Of course not. Likewise, theres nothing wrong with writing a letter to oneself, before writing another letter to oneself in response. Its just a person maintaining correspondence with anoth-, no uh, a like-minded person. Who just so happens to be our editor. Um lets just pretend these conversations didnt really happen, okay? From one great conversationalist to another, Nick

The last issue of Debate awesome – it certainly brought back the good old days of 90s. The late 90s was actually a period of radical transformation in entirety. The early 90s was the time I will regard as the best years of my early stripling life. For a rock music lover, the artists/albums that appeared to be extant in that era were Bryan Adams, Santana, Tina Turner, etc. While it is much to talk about, it is sad the blue moon can be measured today with the realm of incremental changes in technology. But thanks to the historians and archivists; an account of a carefree life with less global problems will be there in their diaries for kids of the future to imagine. In the assiduities of our lives and quest for survival, lending a moment of our time to flash back is not worth either and boring. Going down the memory lane for me, credit is due for the players in the 90s scene who have prompted the innovators to design present. With due respect to the change that I am enjoying today, the comparison of digital age with by-gone era of 90s makes me scared of where the world would be in the next 10 to 20 years – Destructive or Constructive. Thank God I am alive and have lived the past, enjoying the present and will cherish the future. Thanks

fruit gym exercise recipes calories issue 17 AUG 2010

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Everything by Tamsyn Solomon

I am the stars you gaze at I am the ground you stand upon I am the wind that flies past you I am the shadow by your side I am the water you drink, the food you eat, the clothing you wear. I am the girl that you kiss, the boy that you touch, the children you will have. I am the noise in your head, the people that you meet, the sun in your eyes.

But I am not a god, or a deity or a spirit. I am not an idea, or a an opinion, not a metaphor or a statement. I not what you think and I am not what you know. I don’t come from outside, within, around or about. I am everything, I am nothing.

I am the mountain before you I am the sea beneath you I am the trees that rock back and forth. I am your eyes, your ears, your mouth, your hands, I am your body, and I am your soul. I am your heart and mind.

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Tamsyn Solomon Comic page

Shounak Vilekar Healthy Living


Students back CEO Rick Ede as he takes on universities, unions in media battle

From CD to MP3 to USB? by Hayley Jacobsen (In Unison)

by Amanda Haxton (In Unison) Unitec CEO Dr Rick Ede has entered a media battle with many of the country’s universities and education unions over a possible initiative which would link tertiary funding to job success. Dr Ede wrote an opinion piece in The New Zealand Herald which supported the initiative proposed by Minister for Tertiary Education Steven Joyce during a speech at Victoria University. Dr Ede criticised the Vice-Chancellors Committee, which represents New Zealand’s eight universities, and the Tertiary Education Union (TEU). TEU president Tom Ryan issued a statement following Joyce’s speech saying “[the] suggestion that tertiary funding should be linked to employment outcomes rather than academic outcomes is a dangerous path for the sector”. Dr Ede replied in his opinion piece: “[Ryan] seems to imply that an institution that actually pays attention to delivering courses that might help people get ahead in life,

Underground publishers will gather on Saturday, August 14 in St Kevin’s Arcade as the Auckland Zinefest returns for a second year. The festival celebrates a DIY approach to publishing, and will feature stalls from some of the biggest names in New Zealand zines. There will also be workshops and talks by long-time zine makers, including Richard Cooke, who works for commercial magazines like Rip It Up and Big Day Out magazine, along with creating underground zines. Like last year, they have an award for ‘zine of the fest’, where people can submit their zines to be judged on content, design and materials. “I think it’s cool to have that competition aspect because you can do your zine and put it out and you don’t really get any feedback from it. It can be quite tough,” says event coorganiser Tessa Stubbing. Last year saw almost 200 zine enthusiasts turn up to the event, with the crowd ranging from “comic guys, cutesy graphic design girls to anarchists”. Organised by former AUT students Stubbing, Nick Boyd and Tes Clark last year in the Cross Street studios, the trio had to find a new

through giving them better career options, is ipso facto not capable of high academic standards. “I wonder what his members, who work in New Zealand’s 20 institutes of technology and polytechnics, think about that?” Dr Ede went on to criticise the New Zealand Vice-Chancellors Committee, saying they had “damned the idea with faint praise”. “The university approach to any threat of change, now and in the past, appears to translate as ‘push more money under the door and leave us to spend it wisely for you’.” AUT University’s Vice-Chancellor Committee chairman Derek McCormack told The Herald the employment of graduates was important to universities. However, he added that freedom of thought creativity and other aspects of higher education were also of broad benefit to society. The initiative is yet to be confirmed or implemented and the debate is likely to be ongoing.

USB sticks may be replacing CDs as a way of music distribution in New Zealand, after the success of The Mint Chicks Bad Buzz album. The Mint Chicks partnered with Music.Hype to release their latest album on a specially designed USB stick, which was designed by band member Ruban Neilson. Music.Hype’s music guide Mike Penhall says after speaking with the band they agreed the CD was a dying format. “I guess our goal is to provide something of better value than a cheaply produced CD, and encouraging people to enjoy the music by offering it on a cool product.” The stick holds not only the music but band photos and artwork. Since Bad Buzz’s release, Music.Hype decided to create an indie music compilation on USB, including the songs of winners of their Indie Mix Tape competition. One winner of the competition, AUT student Peta Edmonds, says the “in thing” now is to have USB sticks. “It’s new age. We went from vinyl records to tapes and tapes to discs, and now we’re going digital and putting digital on USB.”

location after the artist-run gallery was shut down earlier this year. But Boyd says being in the hub of K Rd has meant publicity and support has been a lot more widespread this time around. “We’ve got in touch with the K Rd business association and they’ve helped us out heaps. They’ve given us a bit of monetary help and good advice… everyone’s been really awesome,” he says. Stubbing says she fell in love with zines after discovering one called Punk Brazil in Real Groovy when she was 15. “Zines can be on any topic at all and packaged together in any way imaginable. Seeing how different people use that freedom is very exciting and liberating to witness.” The event will run from 11-4pm, with an after party planned down in the Wine Cellar. More than 300 people are expected to turn up on Saturday, and Stubbing says there is something for everyone. “[It’s] an awesome way to immerse yourself in the local community. There’ll be opportunities for the zine newbie as well as the experienced zinester to take something out of it.”

issue 17 AUG 2010

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Moroccan bean soup (Harira)

Beef casserole Serves: 6 - 8 Cost: $2.20 Dairy free. Gluten free if use GF stocks and flavours

Serves: 4 Cost: $1.18 per serve Dairy free, Gluten free if you use corn flour to thicken rather than flour.

This delicious wee gem of a soup is from a vegetarian cook book called Quick and Easy, which has some fantastic vegetarian ethnic recipes which never fail to please. This is a really hearty soup that is ready in minutes. It’s better the longer it cooks or the day after so making a big batch is definitely not an issue, it’ll get eaten up pretty quick. Winter is a great time for growing coriander; it can be grown in a pot and is wonderful in so many dishes. It’s one of the few fresh herbs I use often enough to warrant having a couple of plants in my garden each winter!

150g dried chickpeas, soaked overnight or for a few hours 1 x 400g can cannellini or other beans 1 x can tomatoes 1 onion, chopped ½ teaspoon turmeric ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon 1 teaspoon ground coriander 2 tablespoons fresh coriander, chopped Juice of ½ lemon Chilli powder to taste 1 tablespoon flour

Fritters Serves: 3 - 4 Cost: $1.24 per serve This recipe is from the latest Cuisine (No 141) and is contributed by Chef Yotam Ottolenghi. His name for it is ‘Green pancakes’ but I think fritters are a better descriptor. I have reduced the baking powder and the spring onions ever so slightly from the original recipe. It’s a lovely brunch, a light lunch or a good starter if you’re doing a dinner with more than one course. The flavour is very subtle and it goes very well with a tomato or a plum chutney. Just make sure you squeeze as much water out of the spinach as you can, otherwise your fritters will be soggy.

250g spinach 110g self raising flour 2 teaspoons baking powder 1 egg 50g margarine, melted ½ teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon ground cumin 150ml milk (2/3 cup 3 medium spring onions, finely sliced

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1. Boil the chickpeas in water for about 15-20 minutes or until soft to bite 2. Place cooked chickpeas, beans, tomatoes and onion into a large saucepan 3. Add turmeric, cinnamon, ground coriander, lemon juice and 1 tablespoon of the fresh coriander 4. Add water to cover the ingredients. This soup has so much flavour that it doesn’t even need stock! 5. Bring to the boil and simmer for 10 – 15 minutes 6. When ready remove a little of the liquid and mix it with the flour to make a paste and then stir it into the soup. This will thicken the soup 7. Continue to cook the soup for a further 5 minutes or longer if you can so the flavours can blend 8. Add the chilli and the coriander to each individual plate as you wish.

Chilli to taste 2 tablespoons oil

1. Cook the spinach for approximately two minutes in boiling water, rinse under the cold tap 2. Once the spinach is cool, squeeze the spinach to get as much water out as you can and roughly chop 3. Put the flour, baking powder, cumin and salt into a bowl 4. Make a well in the middle and mix in the milk, egg, melted butter 5. Beat until smooth 6. Add spring onions, chilli and spinach and mix with a fork 7. Put a small amount of oil into a fry pan on a medium heat. 8. Put dessertspoonfuls of mix into the hot pan and cook for two minutes either side until golden 9. Keep warm in the oven on a plate with kitchen paper while you’re cooking the rest 10. Serve warm with chutney

There’s nothing as satisfying as a casserole in winter when it’s cold and dreary outside. This casserole has lots of lovely winter veges in it that have cooked in the sauce, which adds flavour as well as saves on dishes. To be honest, my casseroles are never exactly the same; it depends on what I have in the cupboard. There’s always Worcestershire sauce, tomatoes, onion, garlic and pepper. If I have red wine open, I’ll put some in. I’ve used leftover BBQ sauce before and balsamic vinegar, soy sauce, cumin, paprika, thyme, rosemary and fresh ginger also appear every now and again. I tend to focus on root vegetables but that too can be flexible.

1 onion 1 – 2 cloves or 1 - 2 teaspoons garlic, minced 1 tablespoon oil 600 – 700g gravy, chuck or blade steak 2 medium potatoes, scrubbed and 2cm diced 1 – 2 medium kumara, scrubbed and 2cm diced 1 – 2 parsnips, scrubbed and 2cm diced 2 carrots, scrubbed and 2cm diced 50g mushrooms 1 can chopped tomatoes 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce 3 – 4 cups water with 2 teaspoons stock powder Black pepper to taste Other flavourings to taste (paprika, thyme, soy sauce, balsamic vinegar, cumin, red wine, beer, tomato paste)

Black Magic chocolate cake Serves: 12 Cost per serve: $0.27 This recipe is a beautiful dark, moist cake has been a favourite of mine for years. It always turns out well and is definitely a crowd pleaser. It originally came from a National Women’s hospital fundraising recipe book which I lost somewhere along the way. Luckily I knew this recipe by heart! I think it’s one of the best chocolate cakes you’ll come across and is delicious by itself, with vanilla ice-cream or custard and keeps well for three or four days (if it lasts that long!)

1 ¾ cups plain flour ¾ cups cocoa 2 teaspoons baking soda 1 teaspoon baking powder ½ teaspoon salt 1 ½ cups sugar 1 teaspoon vanilla essence 2 eggs, lightly beaten 1/3 cup canola oil 1 cup milk mixed with 1 teaspoon vinegar or lemon juice 1 cup brewed coffee (I use plunger coffee)

1. Preheat oven to 160°C or turn your crock pot on to heat 2. Scrub and chop vegetables and put into casserole dish or crock pot 3. Trim fat from meat and cut into 2-3cm chunks 4. Heat oil in a fry pan, add onions and garlic and cook until soft 5. Remove onion and put into casserole dish or crock pot 6. Brown the meat in batches in the fry pan, once browned place into the casserole dish or crock pot 7. Add stock and other flavourings to the fry pan, bring to the boil and pour

into the casserole dish or crock pot. 8. Cook at 160° for ½ hour or in the crock pot on high for four hours or low for eight hours. The casserole is ready when the meat and vegetables are tender. 9. If the sauce is too thin mix in some corn flour mixed with a little water at the end and put back on to heat for a few minutes to thicken.

1. Preheat the oven to 180°C 2. Grease and line a 9”/24cm cake pan 3. Measure the vinegar into the milk and leave to sit until required 4. Sift dry ingredients into a big bowl 5. Stir in sugar and make a well in the middle for the rest of the ingredients 6. Add beaten eggs, vanilla, oil, curdled milk and coffee 7. Beat by hand or with an electric mixer for approximately three minutes or until smooth 8. Pour into prepared cake tin (the mixture should be quite thin) 9. Cook at 180°C for 45 minutes to one hour or until an inserted skewer comes out clean


In a world of sexed up vampires and psychic octopi, there’s not a lot we can’t do these days. My iPod knows what music goes best together, Bruce is allowed to marry George and we can make phone calls on top of containers in the middle of the ocean (supposedly). However I don’t think I’ve ever been so overwhelmed with choice when confronted with TAB sports odds. Much more than just head-to-head fixtures, they’ll give you the price, the player and how many teeth they’ll lose in the process. If only there were odds on Nathan Hindmarsh losing his shorts. There’s a guaranteed buck. You see, it’s not gambling if you know who’s going win and that’s exactly what they want you to think. If you put a loose $20 in the pokies, then it’s up to the little fate-deciding thingy-whatsit inside the machine that determines your success. I rather like to think of it as a mad leprechaun sitting somewhere behind the screen, laughing at the fools who spin away their lives. Not for sports though. All those precious hours spent analysing everything and anything that Sky Sports will broadcast accumulate to a wealth of sporting trivia no TAB could possibly surpass. “It’s a wet day, so there won’t be many points” or “I’ve just got a feeling Chris Martin will get a century today”. What red-blooded male is going to settle for the numbers an anonymous tipster generates? While B-list celebrities warn us about problem gambling, we’re being told the exact opposite by big name businesses. They may not be telling us to put our money where our mouths are literally, but their clever advertising campaigns are highly effective in implying so. It’s like those ‘Space Man’ lollies you have that look like cigarettes that you pretend to smoke with steamed breath as to instill the habit. It often doesn’t take much because we don’t really need an incentive to gamble. It’s in our nature to get that adrenaline rush from taking a risk. What springs to mind is an offer the TAB made to the public prior to the commencement of the Football World Cup. Alas, the All Whites were part of the great tournament for the first time since 1982. The air was ripe with blind optimism and the adoring public was convinced that this one shot for glory was all we needed to turn the sporting world on its head. So for every new subscriber to a TAB account, they gave $20 to which they could spend to their heart’s desire. The idea was as cunning as it was clever. Everybody likes free stuff. Would you be reading this very magazine if it weren’t? To personally dispense the money to gamble with wouldn’t be of concern to the TAB. All the serious pundits out there would already have an account, so the new subscribers would only be the All White bandwagoners

issue 17 AUG 2010

such as myself. They’re going to get all that money back when we blow it all on our heroes to make it past the group stage. Turning 18 just last year and lured by the smell of any privilege I am now entitled to, I took up the offer. Just as the stars predicted, I faithfully invested my money in the All Whites to draw with Italy. I rode that game like a horse at Ellerslie until the final hooter sounded and we had made history. Thirty-two dollars fifty later, this gig was a piece of cake and I was telling anybody that would listen of how I stuck it to the man and beat the system. And just when you think the master plan had backfired, you couldn’t be more wrong. You see I am now a gambling genius. Of course my gut instinct that the All Whites were going to go alright is foolproof. I now yield a tool that shall bring me untold riches, which is why my balance now reads zero dollars and zero cents. It only took two more guaranteed winners to put me back at square one. I still can’t believe Federer didn’t make it past the quarters in the French AND Wimbledon. Now pop ups infest my screen as to how I could siphon more money from my bank account into their out stretched hands. It eventually cost them nothing for me to get into their system, get familiarised with betting options and show them just how clever I am. However they’ve only truly won if I go back for more, which many will, which is where they’re two steps ahead. Sports commentators don’t give us all the odds at half time for the fun of it, no matter how politely they say “gamble responsibly”. I think I’ll stick to the debate horoscopes to foretell my luck.

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Hey everyone! Here goes another week of study and life! Last week we celebrated Te Wiki o Te Reo Maori! We were very pleased to have contributed to the breakfast last week and hope that our Maori students and community here at AUT enjoyed celebrating their culture and language! Kia Kaha! Voluntary Student Membership (VSM) - If any of you want to have your say or input in what AuSM will present to the Education Science Select Committee, please email me veronica.nglam@aut.ac.nz and I will be happy to hear any messages you would like for us to relay to the committee. This is an important time for us and it is equally important that we are representing you accurately and we are aware of your views in order to push through your perspectives. AuSM Elections for 2011 - Step up and challenge yourself! This is a great way to give back to your student body and to and make a difference here at our university. Many of you would have received emails by now requesting for nominations and so I urge you to take a leap of faith and try something new. You don’t have anything to lose but you sure as hell have everything to gain! Remember elections close at the end of this week so make sure you get in to win. Our events keep on rolling with our foam party last week which was a huge success as usual! Always a nice way for us to clean and wash our quad. Clubs for our new students are still around for you to join up to. And don’t forget the free feeds we are running for you weekly: • Monday – Manukau • Tuesday – North Shore • Thursday – City I will be back after elections and I wish all the candidates the best of luck! And I encourage you ALL to vote and be part of choosing your leaders! Best wishes for your week ahead – Ia Manuia Your fellow president, Veronica Ng Lam AuSM President 921-9999 ext 8571 veronica.nglam@aut.ac.nz

Diary Design Competition We are now inviting students to submit a cover for the 2011 AuSM student diary. We print 20,000 copies so this is an amazing chance to get your work into the public sphere. We will select 10 finalists and ask students to vote for the winner. The winner’s artwork will be on every cover and the winner also receives a $500 Gordon Harris voucher. The runners up will each win a $250 Gordon Harris voucher. Jobs at AuSM AuSM is currently advertising for a full-time Volunteer Co-ordinator. We are looking for someone to develop and implement a programme to effectively recruit and manage AuSM volunteers as well as supporting campus based clubs. Applications for this role MUST be received through www.seek.co.nz, keyword “AuSM”. Student Job Search is now operating out of the AuSM city office. SJS will help you to gain skills, work experience, career opportunities and financial freedom by giving you student friendly advice, linking you to job opportunities that fit around your study and a competitive advantage over other job seekers. Pop in and see SJS staff Monday to Thursday: 10am to 4pm and Friday: 10am to 3.30pm, register online www.sjs.co.nz or call 0800-757- 562. Half-price Holiday Book to stay at the AuSM Lodge during August and September and pay half price for all weeknights booked. For information and bookings see: www. ausm.org.nz/ausm-lodge or email patrick. waller@aut.ac.nz.

Lockers Yes, there are still a few lockers available on the City campus and North Shore campus. Lockers are $20 per semester and conveniently located in the WC Building. If you would like to rent a locker, see the AuSM reception staff. Free Feeds AuSM is now serving Free Feeds every Monday at Manukau Campus! This is a move that has been strongly supported by Manukau Campus students. AuSM Free Feeds are on the North Shore campus every Tuesday and City campus every Thursday. Every week includes a vegetarian option and fruit. Were you snapped? Photos from Winter Fest are now up on the AuSM website and AuSM@AUT Facebook page. Check them out, tag yourself or upload your own photos. If you are interested in taking photos for our events and gigs in the future, make sure you let us know! Email: debate@aut.ac.nz. AuSM Mates Rates AUT students now have access to more than 120 exclusive discounts with AuSM Mates Rates. Check out all the latest discounts online at www.ausm. org.nz. Registrations for AuSM Mates Rates Cards are coming in thick and fast! We hope to have all registered cards out to students this week so if you have registered on our website and haven’t received your card yet email kate.campbell@aut.ac.nz Sell, seek or swap Want to buy or sell books, find a flatmate, form a band or get a message out? AuSM Classifieds is an easy way to communicate to other AUT students. Best of all its free! See the Classifieds section on the AuSM website www.ausm.org.nz.

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should freedom camping be banned? by Samantha McQueen

For most of you, the upcoming summer will mean that you’ll pack your bags and get the hell out of Auckland. No offence to the big smoke, but no one wants to spend their summer sweating in a concrete jungle, when they could be living the dream on a beach somewhere. If you head to the Coromandel, or up north to the land of a million beaches, you are probably going to come across a van covered with graffiti and obscenities, stuffed with bedding and tourists. As repulsive as they may sound to some, hundreds of bookings are made for these Wicked Campers by tourists and campers alike. They’re easy – you don’t have to worry about tent poles and blowing up airbeds when you hit the campsite. You just put the car in park and unfold the back to reveal the storage. But according to everyone’s favourite mayor, Tim Shadbolt, some of these tourists – known as freedom campers – are taking to relieving themselves all over our pretty countryside because the vans don’t have toilet facilities installed in them. The problem isn’t the vans, it’s the disgusting people that are renting the vans. Installing portaloos isn’t going to make any difference. They need to be cleared out too. They don’t just magically disappear into the mythical poo factory. If they can’t bother holding on to the nearest toilet stop, then they sure as hell aren’t going to do the same courtesy for a whole toilet full of shit. Now, I’m not sure on what the public toilet facilities are like in the South Island, but in the North Island, you generally can find one in at least a 50km radius. And that’s being generous. If you’re driving to the mountains to hit slopes, you drive through Huntly, Cambridge, Tokoroa, Tirau, Taupo… all of these places have rest stops (although the standards might be about the same as perching on the side of the road). Same with travelling the same distance up North. You have the entire North Shore, Warkworth, Whangarei… whatever is past Whangarei. The law shouldn’t be to outlaw all the camper vans and customised vans if they don’t have proper bathroom facilities; they should just employ a list of easy access public toilets the North and South island. Simple, huh? How did campers ever survive before this genius idea? Reading this back, it just seems like common sense – New Zealand campers haven’t been pulled up on this disgusting habit before (that I know of). The solution is to educate, not just boot them back to where they belong (although they probably deserve it). While the mega bucks comes from wealthy businessmen who travel over business class and light up $100 bills on the Viaduct, a large portion of our tourism economy comes from backpacking travellers who for some reason, choose New Zealand as their O.E. destination (guess you have to leave to appreciate it). If we got rid of all the Wicked Camper vans and Jucy rentals, how do you think they’ll get around? Their options are buying a cheap, questionably safe van off TradeMe, catching the bus or hitchhiking. None of these options sound appealing, and two of them are downright dangerous. There’s a way to change our image – come to New Zealand, where we throw you on the street and if you survive, well done! New Zealand doesn’t have that luxury at their fingertips; we’re one of the youngest nations in the world, and that’s why people come here. Another solution that is painfully obvious is to add more public toilets around the country. If it’s really becoming such a problem, shouldn’t the government respond to the demand. I don’t know about you, but I would rather have some new public toilets along the coast of the Coromandel, than even more roading disruptions in Auckland, or even a party central (hello, it’s called town, and bars seem to be doing okay at the moment). Camping is part of the New Zealand experience, and companies like Wicked Campers and Jucy are just capitalising on what we have partaken in for years. Give people more places to poo and then this problem will be solved. The end. issue 17 AUG 2010

by Jared Van Huenen

Two weeks ago everyone’s favourite mayor, Tim Shadbolt, piped up about a problem we Aucklanders are decidedly immune to. The fact we live in the biggest, most unscenic place in New Zealand renders us a tad nonchalant when it comes to rural issues, particularly rural South Island issues. But as Shadbolt described to RadioLive’s Marcus Lush last week, this issue isn’t just the ramblings of a crazy Invercargillite. Freedom camping is basically when tourists (though a very small group of NZers do it) hire out low quality budget vans that have been remodelled to include bedding and a sink and a DVD player, and travel around the countryside looking for pretty things, both scenic and we can assume, human. For $25 a day, hoards of (if Southlanders are to be believed) Europeans can meander around our beautiful country and take lots of pictures for Facebook. I say, no problem. The matter at hand, however, is a certain amenity that these revamped Toyota Lucidas are missing. If these vans had toilets, the world would be right again. But they don’t, and the stuff that’s supposed to go in toilets ends up all over the sprawling meadows and the grassy knolls. “What the fuck?”, I hear you mumble with a scrunched up nose and a mixture of surprise and disdain. Yes my friends, dirty foreigners are coming to our country and shitting everywhere. Gross. As I mentioned earlier, we’re in a state of isolation up here in Auckland, because if someone decided to shit on, say, Mayoral Drive, people would notice. When you’re touring countryside where there’s about eight people per million square metres (made up statistic), you can shit anywhere and get away with it. Which is disgusting, and it needs to be stopped because even if we don’t see the effects up here, we’re all more than aware that the South Island is way better looking than the north, and the tourism down there pays for the Newmarket bridge up here. For once in my life I have a solution to a problem, as opposed my usual mix of moaning and whinging. Ban the piece of shit vans. Jucy Rentals and Wicked-Campers have been making a mint renting out $1000 vans to poor tourists for nearly 10 years and now they’re faced with a problem that their business can’t really fix. The vans are too small to fit portaloos and even if they weren’t, who’s to say that these ignorant, disgusting people wouldn’t just dump those in the bush too? There’s the big tourism argument where people say “but these people are spending millions! You can’t kick them out!”. Guess what, we can kick them out. Because they’re obviously not going to singlehandedly bolster our economy when they can’t even afford a decent campervan. All we need to do is make it illegal to hire out a vehicle without bathroom facilities unless you’re staying for, say, less than five days. And then all we’d need to do is sort out all the bureaucratic nonsense that surrounds new legislation and law enforcement. When you’re a country as small as New Zealand is, you need to protect what you’ve got in order to make any money in the future. And with the exception of farming, pretty mountains is all we’ve got. If it means losing a few dollars (probably literally) in the short term to secure our long term reputation, I can’t see how it’s even up for debate. Maybe I’m being shortsighted but I honestly don’t think we’d lose millions if we changed the laws, people would just wait until they had more money before they came here, which is fine by me. I’ve never witnessed a tourist taking a dump on my property but I’m pretty sure it would be anything but 100 per cent pure. Shouldn’t we do whatever we can to stop it?

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Who wants to spend $90 for seven days worth

of maple syrup, cayenne pepper, laxative tea and sea salt? Hmm sounds like good value doesn’t it? This is what the lemon detox diet offers; the opportunity to starve yourself for seven days which, according to the many testimonials on the website will make you feel “energised” and fantastic. Oh and you’ll lose weight too. Detox diets are the most recent food craze to hit the streets of Hollywood. Everyone’s doing them; Beyonce, Ashanti, Gwyneth Paltrow… the list goes on. But are they really all they’re cracked up to be? The idea of ‘detoxifying’ your body comes from the idea that all the toxins we expose ourselves to in everyday life (pollution, bad food, coffee, alcohol etc) build up in our body. The fascinating thing about this theory is that our kidneys, liver and intestines are there for the express purpose of detoxifying our blood and getting rid of waste. The liver filters our blood and detoxifies drugs and alcohol and other body systems like the kidneys and intestines are designed to remove waste and toxins from our body. Another aspect to consider is if we stop introducing or reduce how much we are having of some of these “toxins” (e.g. coffee, alcohol, drugs, high fat food) then naturally the body will ‘detoxify’ itself. So can we really say it’s the ‘detox’ diet that is doing the cleansing or is it just because we have stopped introducing toxins to our body? Detox diets aren’t meant to be about weight loss, although that’s a huge motivation for many people. Detox diets provide you with about a quarter of what a person should be eating in a day. When you have such a low food intake your body starts to breakdown muscle to provide fuel which

also releases water. You lose weight very quickly because you’re losing predominantly water and muscle mass (there is some fat mass loss but not much). The concern with these ‘diets’, is that if you don’t change your eating and activity habits and just ‘detox’ every few months to lose weight you set up a vicious, self-esteem lowering cycle of weight loss then weight gain. Sounds really effective doesn’t it? So where’s the silver lining in all of this? Well the good news is that you don’t have to spend hundreds of dollars a year to ‘detox’. All you need to do is cut out (or cut back) your alcohol and caffeine consumption, drink plain water and focus on eating lower fat meals and more fruit and vegetables and let you liver and kidneys do the rest. Yes, it is that simple. If you start to do these things and combine it with increasing your activity then lo and behold you’ll also probably start to slowly lose weight. Slow and steady weight loss is much better because it is likely that you’re losing fat mass rather than muscle mass or water which is what you want. And as for detox diets I think Elle magazine summed it up best when they reviewed the diet and said “giving your body a break from, well, everything, leaves it tighter and feeling cleansed”. Well yes you will feel ‘tighter’ because you’re probably constipated and you might feel ‘cleansed’ because you haven’t had any ‘toxins’ for a week. In all honesty though, how can “giving your body a break from, well, everything” be a good thing? Humans need food and fluid to function and live, that is what we’re designed for, not starving ourselves.

Have you thought about joining the gym but haven’t because you’re not sure about what to expect? The AUT gyms are great because they’re user friendly, not as pretentious as some gyms and they also give students a great price! So if you’re thinking about taking the plunge and joining, here are some key things you need to bring with you when you work out.

Attitude

We have a friendly and inviting atmosphere at both our City and North Shore gyms so you will always be supported and encouraged when you come in. Assistance is always on hand from our REPs registered fitness instructors who are always keen and eager to help you out. Be sure to come to the gym with a great attitude, have fun and work hard.

Water Bottle

Towel

Storage

You must always have a towel when you’re training in the weights room regardless of whether you’re stretching, going for a quick 20 minute run or just using a few pieces of equipment. This rule is to maintain cleanliness, hygiene standards, as well as a common courtesy for your fellow gym members. All members are required to have their own towel and not share with a friend. Using a t-shirt is not an acceptable substitute. Training in the gym without a towel is not permitted.

Clothing

Appropriate clothing is essential when training in the weights room. We are a training facility for new fitness instructors/personal trainers and health professionals within the fitness industry so we have a responsibility to maintain very high standards within our training facility/weights room. Clothing that isn’t permitted is: jeans, jean shorts, work boots, muddy shoes or trainers, pants with metal studs and clothing with inappropriate slang. If you’re wearing any of the above, please do not be offended if you’re asked to either change, or if you have no other alternative clothing, leave.

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A water bottle is encouraged but not compulsory. We have a water fountain located across from reception. Water bottles used in the gym must be sealable whether it’s a sipper bottle or a screw top. No open containers are permitted. No soft drinks or energy drinks e.g. Red Bull etc are permitted.

We have three forms of storage available for you to use when you come to the gym. Storage varies between the City gym and the North Shore gym so please speak with reception to work out what’s best for you. Temporary cubby holes are outside the gym at North Shore which can be used for the duration of your workout. Lockable lockers are available, so if you bring your own padlock you can secure your valuables. Again these lockers are only to be used for the duration of your workout. If you forget your padlock you can hire one from reception for $2. You can also hire your very own locker for the duration of your membership. A small locker costs $50 and the large costs $80. Please bear in mind that these lockers can only be hired by gym members. Lockers are routinely checked and padlocks found on lockers which are not hired will be cut. So with these things in mind come and speak to reception staff at the gym about your membership options. If you have any other questions or concerns just ask, we’re always happy to help you become more active.


Auckland: the city of sails, and soon to be

the biggest city in Australasia. But are we ready? Are we prepared? The simple answer: no. When it comes down to the nitty gritty of it we simply do not have the quality of resources or decision makers this city needs to become such a powerful and influentional force. Spend one day living the natural life of an Auckland resident. Let’s say you live in the suburbs of wider Auckland and you work or study in the city centre. You wake in the morning to get ready for the day; you have to use the public transport system because driving in the early morning traffic annoys you. You walk to the train station to wait for your train; its 8.15am, and peak hour for school kids and most university students. You spend 10 minutes more than you need to waiting for the train as the train, as usual, is not running on time. The amount of people on the platform has built up as a result – you are looking at about 50 people waiting to get on board the train. By the time the train arrives at the platform you are more than frustrated that your day has started delayed. You then notice the train that has arrived at the platform has two carriages. A two carriage train for a peak hour train service. With your anger and disgust you board the train, but the fact is you go through this every couple of days; having a half-ass public transport system is the norm in this city. So you stand on the packed train, which is only halfway through its service, contemplating a life overseas because their public systems are much better organised. The train starts to arrive at its final stops, by now the train is fully packed with people having to be nose-tonose with each other. You look around and notice the scene reminds of pictures you see in India of people packing into a train. You then think to yourself, “how is it that a city with a population of one million residents has to put up with packing into a train like cattle into a truck?” The fact of the matter is situations like this happen all too often in this city and there is no other quality alternative. You cannot drive because our genius of a motorway system has three lanes which allow trucks at peak hour to travel on creating bigger problems with traffic that already exists. In this new era we have a world at the mercy of global warming; there have been various arguments and suggestions on how to kerb this problem yet no efficient steps have been taken. In New Zealand – like all other countries around the world – we have this motivation to start using more naturally efficient ways of transport, yet there is no efficient and effective system in place to support this thought of “going green”. We simply pump money into roads and it’s nowhere near enough needed to fix our transport system. As a student, how exactly does influencing more people to drive by making newer roads or motorways rather than improving the quality of the transport issue 17 AUG 2010

system make people “go green”? What we have here, ladies and gentlemen, is a so called democratic system not using simple logic to get things done. We have a culture problem in this city of letting public service problems turn into bigger problems while we focus all our attention on to public reserves and whether or not the grass needs to be cut. When there is a problem, you solve it. In Auckland’s case when there is a problem, you find new and more complicated ways of getting around it and simply leaving the problem to grow. Our failures to set up a simple party central have also come into question. How does this city expect to expand the geographical boundaries of a council when their failings to set up a simple event have failed them miserably? Yes we have finally set up an event, yet this came after much controversy and embarrassment to the people of Auckland. Timing for the introduction of this major structural change also has to be questioned. As we all know the IRB Rugby World Cup will take place from September next year, with all eyes on Auckland as we are the main hosts for this international tournament. How will this city cope with a massive influx of people when we are currently going through a major change in the way people run our city? Not to mention our so called “public transport system”. How are we, as Aucklanders, going to feel when our embarrassment of a public transport system fails us? We have a council that simply cannot get it right. We have a massive amount of public stating they do not want the super city to go ahead yet nobody listens; we are, at the end of the day, the people who are going to make this work. You cannot run a population if you do not have the emotional support of the population. Auckland City defies this simple rule. Do we really want visitors to see this problem? Do we really want to leave the impression of “yeah they’re clean but don’t ask them to manage anything” and “yeah, Auckland can resolve its problems very effectively…just after the mayor has finished smacking himself over the head a couple times”. Our resources are not effective; our timing of the introduction of this super city is questionable. The sad underlying truth of it is, our public transport system is only one of the operational failures the city cannot seem to resolve. I simply see no common sense in the logic behind transforming a city into a “super city”, and nor should anybody else. There is no good reason why we should. Vital problems lie within the system and no steps are being taken to resolve them. The sad underlying truth is the people who run Auckland, do not have what it takes to take this city to the next step. We are underprepared, too optimistic and too stubborn to realise the truth. This city may not survive.

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L

ife is full of choices. Chocolate or vanilla, drive or walk, Family Guy or Campbell Live. I chose what I’m wearing today, I chose what I am studying, I chose my friends and, to a large degree, I can choose where to live and how to spend my time and my money. But sometimes I wonder just how far those choices can go. How much influence do we really have over the bigger things – like, say, how our country is run? We’re lucky in New Zealand. We live in a democratic society. We have the right to choose our government. We have access to media reports that can, and do, critique our parliament members and let us know if they do anything we might not like. We can choose to protest loudly and obnoxiously when we don’t like what’s going on. But closer inspection reveals that we don’t get to choose everything that affects our lives. Far from it. Sure, we get asked if we’d prefer centre right to centre left, whether we want this Mayor or that Mayor. But beyond that, how often do we really get asked for our opinion? Who here voted to join the emissions trading scheme, for example? Plenty of people have an opinion about it, but it’s really anyone’s guess as to what the outcome of that referendum would be. Regardless, New Zealand is signed up for the scheme. Which means, at some point somebody decided that for us. But Doesn’t Democracy Mean Everyone Decides Everything? When I was a kid and learned the meaning of the word, that was certainly the impression I got. Democracy means we get a say in what happens in our country, I was told. Democracy is fair. As it turns out, there are different forms of democracy. Direct or ‘pure’ democracy is when decisions are made by anyone who chooses to put in their two cents – like the smacking referendum, minus the leading and poorly worded question. Then there’s representative democracy, where elected officials make decisions that they believe (hopefully) are in the best interests of the public – like the civil union bill, where parliament, rather than New Zealanders in general, made the vote. It’s representative democracy that we rely on most often. We elect someone to make the decisions, and hope for the best – and protest loudly if we don’t like their choices. Make Some Noise Protest works. We’ve all seen it work. After all, if the government goes against our wishes too much or too often, they know and we know that they won’t get re-elected. Take the government’s recent retreat on the mining issue, for example. After considerable public objection, National announced that there will be no mining in New Zealand’s national parks. So, we may not get to chip in on every decision, but if we feel strongly enough about something, our protests will be responded to. Phew. The thing is though, we can only protest against things that we

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know are happening. What about things that we don’t hear about – like shipments of radioactive uranium ore passing through nuclear free New Zealand? It’s been happening for years, apparently. To be fair, the government didn’t seem to know about it either. And uranium ore is only kind of radioactive. But didn’t we, you know, protest against all of that back in the ‘60s? Didn’t we agree to be nuclear free - not almost nuclear free? If America had asked back then whether they could send uranium ore here, my bet would be that New Zealand would have said no. After all, New Zealanders were opposed even to ships that were probably, almost certainly nuclear free. It just wasn’t good enough. It was nuclear free or nothing. So shouldn’t we at least have been asked whether nuclear-related material could pass through our ports? I mean, at the very least, it’s kind of rude. Life in the Slow Lane Earlier this year, Environment Canterbury – an elected body in Christchurch charged with water management in the area- were sacked by the government and replaced with a non-elected group of people instead. But hang on. Wasn’t there a reason that they were elected, chosen by the people, in the first place? Oh, right. Democracy. We live in a democratic society, and we’re supposed to have a say over who our leaders and decision makers are. So when was it okay for the government to fire and replace an entire elected council? Where does that fit under the definition of democracy? I’m not saying they didn’t have their reasons, but given that the public hired the committee in the first place, shouldn’t they be asked whether they should be fired? Well, yeah. I think they should have. But then, that would take time. And the problem with democracy, of course, is time. Environment Canterbury was fired because their resource consent process was considered too slow. It’s the same problem of slowness that renders complete democracy, well, kind of useless. Asking every eligible voter in New Zealand about each decision would mean a lot of waiting around. On the other hand, if you can forget for a moment about its monumental downsides, good old fashioned dictatorship gets things done. And fast. There’s no red tape to go through. It’s one person’s decision and what they say, goes. What we have with representative democracy - where we decide who makes the decisions, and then they are responsible for doing so - is a compromise. We don’t really want to be asked about everything. It would just take too long. What we need, really, is for the decision makers to be held accountable. We need access to the reports of people who monitor those who do decide – that is, the reports of the media. That way, we get to know which politicians are buying too many packets of gum of their taxpayer-funded credit cards and which public figure got drunk on the weekend. We get to make informed decisions about who we pick to make choices for us. And people like me can write articles like this, without being locked up for treason.


So, I was doing the ol’ economics assignment into the wee hours last week, learning about globalisation. I came across a country that hasn’t caught onto the idea of hanging out with others… North Korea. I was mesmerised and got stuck into a bit of YouTube and Wikipedia. This is what I came up with. Before I begin my rantings, I would just like to make light of the fact that my goal is to enlighten you, not to educate you. If my facts are a wee bit off, feel free to correct them. So… Korea. Korea is about the size of New Zealand. When it comes to history, Korea makes us look wet behind the ears. It is a beautiful land; the peninsula off mainland China’s northeast coast and just to the left of Japan. The country of Korea traces back more than 4000 years and has a rich cultural heritage. Korea has had the rough end of the stick since early last century. The Japanese occupation from 1910, the Allies and the Russians split Korea up after World War II because Japan surrendered. The two superpowers literally ruled a line on the map across the 38th parallel and went halvzies (read: half each). Things continued to go downhill from there. Shortly after WWII, on the other side of the world, the Yanks were getting upset with the idea of Communism and the Russians were getting upset with the idea of Capitalism. They each got into a bit of a spiff about matters and in the process dragged poor North and South Korea into the matter. You’ve probably heard of M*A*S*H. That show was based on the Korean War. In 1950, 22 countries (including New Zealand) started feeding massive amounts of men and weaponry to fight. North vs. South Korea. There were huge casualties and the dividing boarder moved several times. The Cold War nearly went nuclear during this period. After the dust settled from that mess, millions of people had being killed (including an estimated up to two million civilians). In 1953 fighting stopped but apparently the argument has never finished. As is typical with war, things ended up about the same as they had started. North Korea is still communist, still controlled by the same man since 1948. In fact, this man who is still the President of North Korea has been dead since 1994. That’s right folks, Kim II-sung, has been declared the Eternal President of the Republic of North Korea, and he rules from his grave! This is where the paradox begins. Russia used to be a closed market. In other words, it was self-sufficient. Everything was shared “equally” between the people. North Korea was under Russian influence so it ended up a closed market also. Everything went to pot in the 90s recession and Russian iron curtain fell shortly after the Berlin wall. Russia and China are now both open markets in pretty much free trade. Both countries have opened their boarders to new business. Both countries are moving toward the idea of globalisation. Both countries used to support North Korea with funds and supplies but they don’t want to do that anymore. So North Korea is going it alone. North Korea is the most closed economy in the world. Their government doesn’t want to deal with anyone else. They don’t even want humanitarian aide for the millions of their people that are dying of starvation. The people have no connection to the outside world, only what is fed to them through propaganda. The people are told lies like the Americans are ready to launch war on them again, so the North Koreans are prepared for an invasion. Korea’s issue 17 AUG 2010

38th parallel has the highest concentration of military in the world. The North and South stare at each other across a 4km wide no-mans-land. And what does the eternal president think about all this? Well his son is speaking for him. Kim Jong-il. The ‘dear leader’ Kim Jong-il, was the mastermind behind his father’s propaganda machine. Kim Jong-il speaks the mind of his deceased dad, and has assumed the title of Supreme Leader. He is not helping matters for North Korea. He has total control over the government and the military. He doesn’t allow any personal information to be released about him. He has impersonators standing in for him (to thwart assassination attempts). All this on top of the fact that he too is rumoured to have died in 2003, or did he...? The people of North Korea deserve truth and life. They have been cooped up in their own little world without the basic liberties of freedom that we enjoy here in New Zealand. They are the real victims in all of this. There are many similarities between the people of North/South Korea and East/ West Germany and the Germans were pretty darn happy to knock that wall down. Perhaps in our lifetime we’ll see something similar happen in Korea, may it be sooner rather later.

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Running, in my biased opinion, is one of the best ways to get and stay fit and healthy. All you need is a pair of decent running shoes, shorts and a tee and you’re good to go. There are lots of great places to run in Auckland but most people stick to a few different routes which can become tedious. By finding new, interesting places to run, you can become motivated to exercise more often, and you discover amazing places you never knew existed. These are a few of my favourite Auckland runs that many Aucklanders don’t know about. City – Ponsonby Run “City of Sails run”

Glendowie Bird Sanctuary (Tahuna Torea) “The pretty run” This is one of my favourite runs in the city because it avoids as many people and cars as possible. Auckland cars are notorious for speeding up when they spot a runner and Auckland pedestrians either get flustered when they see you and jump in your way or hog the footpath so you are forced to run onto the road with the cars (did I mention

the cars are trying to run you down?). Begin at Victoria Park and head down Halsey Street towards the harbour then just follow the road around the harbour on the outside of the Tank Farm. This run has one of the most amazing views of Auckland Harbour and the only people who enjoy it are the motor homes and gypsy buses that always seem to be parked around here. Continue up Beaumont Street and then take a right just as you go past HQ Restaurant (note a great place to go for breakfast/lunch/coffee after your done – bit of motivation right there!). Westhaven Drive takes you all the way to the harbour bridge; when you get to the roundabout keep going under the harbour bridge and past the fishermen trying their luck, follow the path up Curran Street which is the long slow hill to Jervois Road. Catch your breath back along Jervois Road and then it’s a nice long hill to finish down College Hill and you’re back at Victoria Park. Hill factor: One large hill, otherwise flat Underfoot: Concrete, concrete, concrete. Refuel suggestion: Treat yourself at a harbour side café in the Viaduct

Waikowhai Stairs “The Killer” Waikowhai Park is the place to go if you want to do a serious workout. The Waikowhai stairs is a gruelling, gut busting run which is guaranteed to leave you jelly-legged and delirious but will also hugely help increase your strength and fitness. Head to the Waikowhai Park (off Hillsborough Road); it’s the largest native forest in Auckland City. Park by the playground at Waikowhai Park, take the concrete path that drops down to the West and follow the right fork in the path, cross over the bridge and you will find yourself at the bottom of the stairs. Start the winding path up the stairs at a SLOW run. It will feel easy at first but there are more than 200 steps, (the exact number is not known as every person who has ever tried to count them has lost count). Once you’re at the top (firstly, congratulations!) there is a panoramic view of Manukau Harbour to enjoy if you’re not too busy vomiting up breakfast. Have a jog or walk at the top, shake your legs out then it is back down the stairs to go again. No, not joking – four is good, six is great! Hill factor: Serious Underfoot: Woodlands Refuel suggestion: Lollies and a Powerade from the closest dairy, followed by a hearty meal.

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This is an awesome run as you get to run over boardwalks, through forest trails, across the lagoon walk and down the beach. Start at the Glendowie reserve at the intersection of Riddell Road and Roberta Ave and head to the path along the Tamaki Estuary shoreline. Run over the bridge and up over the steep concrete path into the Bird Sanctuary (good news, apart from this the rest of this run is completely flat). As you make your way down the other side of the concrete path you will be at the start of the trail. Once you are on the trail you can pretty much chose the path you wish, as long as you stick to the trails you won’t get too far from where you started. Hill factor: Low Underfoot: Forest floor and boardwalk Refuel suggestion: Head to a waterfront café in Kohimarama

Ambury Park “The fun run” This is a great run to do, especially in the spring, when the little lambs are frolicking around. There are lots of different ways to get to the park but an easy way is to park at the corner of Kiwi Esplanade and Andes Ave in Mangere Bridge. The park is right on the water and has awesome views across the harbour to the Manukau Heads and Waitakere Ranges. I always choose this run when I have a long run as you can follow the path through the fields, over fences until you hit the gravel path and keep going around the ponds until you feel it is time to come back. There are lots of animals to look out for including sheep, goats, cows, pigs, lambs (in spring), chickens, turkeys, rabbits and peacocks. Also look out for a huge number of Pukeko which constantly get trapped in the three meter high electric fence, I can’t help but go to their rescue every time. Hill factor: Slightly undulating Underfoot: Grass and gravel Refuel suggestion: Take a picnic and enjoy the view afterward Remember, if you are venturing away from home for your run, always remember to take a bottle of water with you and an energy bar or fruit for afterward so you can refuel within 20 minutes of exercising.


I am lying face up in a dark, silent, room that smells of foot odour and incense. The temperature is high and, alarmingly, I am already half-way through my water bottle. Around me, strangers are performing preclass poses in the shadows. Most wear skimpy Nike ensembles, a few are in their togs. The rules seem simple enough. One-hundred-and-fifty dollars buys a one month pass, allowing unlimited classes to Auckland ‘s EastWest Studios (www.eastwest.co.nz). Challengers have to complete 30 90-minute classes before the month is up. If you miss a day, you do a double the next. Keeping us honest is a star chart in the foyer. Each class earns you a sticker by your name. It will be hard not to get results. But thinking it’s simply ‘hanging out in a hot room’ was my first Bikramblunder. And I was about to realise my second. Bang on 7pm, the teacher walks in, turning on the lights. Not a single mat is visible in the room. Instead, people are perched upon beach towels. Now, I’d heard that Bikram yoga makes you sweat, but I thought it would be on par with, say, a run in the park. Nothing my gym towel can’t handle, right? Wrong. In fact, I advise taking the largest, thickest, most luxurious towel you have. The more sweat it can absorb, the more comfortable you will be. We begin with a breathing exercise. “Feet together. Hands clasped tightly under your chin. Elbows in. INHALE! BRING YOUR ARMS UP TO THE CEILING….. One, two, three, four, five…” The next exercise involves holding your arms stiffly above your head and bending sideways. The front row drops effortlessly into crescent moon shapes. My muscles quiver as I struggle to maintain a slight curve. Sweat runs down my face, neck, arms and back. Then we move onto a series of balancing postures. Those in the front-row elegantly extend their legs in front of their hips, stretch them straight behind and then pull their feet up and behind their heads. All while standing on one leg. I fall out every few seconds, thankful many other back-row dwellers are also looking like clumsy twats. Let’s not forget the temperature – and humidity – has been steadily rising. At its peak, I’ll be exercising in temperatures around 40 degrees, with humidity upwards of 40 per cent. By the fourth exercise, even Nicky Watson, who is up the front, looks like a drowned rat. This regulated climate sets Bikram classes apart from other varieties of yoga. The heat allows safer and deeper stretching, and induces a high heart-rate. Bikram Choudhury, who controversially gained USA copyright on the practice in 2002, claims it also flushes toxins, clears the circulatory system and optimises fat-to-muscle conversion. While all this remains unproven, one thing is for sure: Exercising in these conditions adds an element of difficulty that will give even the fittest athlete a kick. Ironically, the hardest exercise is ‘dead body pose’. As the

issue 17 AUG 2010

name suggests, lying lifelessly on the floor is all that’s required. The catch? Well, there are beads of sweat begging to be wiped away, itches demanding to be scratched, a tickle on the foot…. But if you move, the therapeutic benefits of the posture are disturbed. It’s a battle against the ‘angel’ and the ‘demon’ perched on each shoulder. The instructor is not about to let anyone surrender either - “control your monkey mind,” she yells. Bikram yoga really does service the mind, body and soul. I’m impressed to find the class charges my mind and calms my spirit, while pushing me to my physical limits (Bikram famously says: “I don’t sell blueberry cheesecake, I sell pain”). After morning classes, I’m productive, focused and remain undisrupted by the thought of coffee or morning tea. After night classes, I sleep like a baby and bounce out of bed feeling two inches taller and many years younger - and that’s not a standard experience for me. As well as getting the endorphins pumping, daily classes make me starkly aware of what I’m eating, and when. Food two hours before class is off limits, so (in fear of throwing-up in class) I find my pre-dinner snacking curbed. I quickly learn that surviving an evening session means having a substantial lunch, a healthy afternoon snack and taking on as much water as I can manage. Much more thoughtful than my usual rushed lunch, mindless snacks and a second helping of dinner routine! On the advice of the instructors, I’ve also increased my electrolyte intake with miso soup, nuts, oranges and lemons. This replaces the minerals that sweat drains – without having to guzzle down Powerade or toss salt on my veggies. The biggest downside to the challenge is the amount of time it demands. I’m talking two hours a day, every day for class (it pays to be early to acclimatise, and staying late allows your blood pressure to return to normal). Then there’s the masses of sweaty laundry it generates, not to mention the hassle of constantly washing, straightening and styling my hair! Despite this, I’m hooked. My balance, flexibility and strength improve in leaps and bounds. By day 25, I can touch my toes, twist my arms “like rope”, lie with my knees splayed and feet by my hips, and slip easily into the full expression of most poses. I also power through the spine strengthening series, and can hold my balance without taking out the person next to me (most of the time!). As well as all this, the daily practice has taught me to keep an open-mind on my own abilities. One of the teachers says too many people believe they are only ever able to go halfway - and sure enough, they fulfil their prophecy. He convinced me to have an open-mind to the idea “of one day getting there”, and sure enough, my skills steadily progressed. By the month’s end, I am standing taller, with greater muscle tone, more vitality and a radiant glow. Did I complete 30 classes in 30 days? No - I fell three short. But for the record, 27/30 in a test equates to an A pass - And that, to me, is a success.

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There are only so many hours you can hammer

out at the gym before losing motivation, interest or you end up completely ripped. Or perhaps you can’t even motivate yourself to get to the gym in the first place, because it’s too far away, or the only time you can go is 6am when it’s 10 degrees. Who wants to work out then? However there are those people out there looking to stay fit and healthy without getting bored or overdoing it. It’s time to start thinking outside of the box when it comes to exercise and if you read on you may become enlightened. There is nothing wrong with the classics: netball, swimming, rugby and soccer, but it is understandable how one could tire of a lack of variety. There’s nothing wrong with looking elsewhere for physical fulfilment especially with the safe knowledge that those sports will still be there in another hundred years. Plus, these are team sports, and let’s face it – some of you were picked last in P.E. The first activity (and please don’t stop reading when you get to the name) is aquarobics. Yes, you would have to square with the fact that this class does involve a number of more ‘mature’ women but believe it or not it can be a very good workout. Have you ever tried running in water? Yeah, it’s hard. So imagine trying to tone your thighs in a pool. Go with a friend to ease your anxiety at being one of the few under the age of 30 (although these classes are becoming increasingly popular among university students). If the class itself doesn’t get you the workout you were hoping for, chances are your abs will have had the workout from your fits of giggling. Next on the list is pole dancing. I’m not

When we think of a balanced diet, we probably

think of the food pyramid (aka the Kellogg’s pyramid) i.e. the balance of nutrition. However, nutrition itself is only one component of diet and diet is only one component of health. There are many diets which focus on nutrition i.e. Atkins, lemon water, “rabbit food” i.e. apples and lettuce, diet according to blood type, vegetarianism, carnivorous diet etc. Many of us are well aware that there are mental conditions regarding a certain attitude towards food i.e. anorexia, bulimia and obesity. All of these conditions are not really ultimately about food, but rather an attitude towards food. This is the perfect explanation of fruitarians; it is an attitude towards food. It is a diet, but it is also a lifestyle, a psychology, an attitude, a mental condition, a philosophy and a way of being. How can the act of putting food into your mouth be all these things? Is it not just diet? The most accurate descriptor of fruitarianism is a “dietary philosophy”. Dietary philosophy is pertaining to diet, but it is more holistic than just diet. Dietary philosophy is about all of the minute details that surround what we call food. Most notably, the fact that most nutritional objects are living and therefore most food comes from living beings. Vegetarianism would be an example of a dietary philosophy, defined by the absence of nutrition from the animal kingdom. Fruitarianism is a far more radical injunction of dietary philosophy. Of course it’s in the name; fruitarianism is a diet consisting [almost] solely of fruit. The core idea is that food comes from non-living things i.e. fruit,

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saying to reconsider your career choice but to merely try a class. Pole dancing is no longer all strippers and thongs (sorry to the hopefuls who thought that this was the case) as it is becoming more and more widely recognised as a very physical sport. There was even a piece on the news a month or so back about the national pole dancing championships. It combines dance and fitness and focuses on toning your arms and core, as well as improving your flexibility. Once again, you may want to take a friend as a form of a security blanket if you’re feeling a tad shy. My final suggestion comes with my own personal recommendation: trampolining. I’m not referring to the one in your back garden that you haven’t been on in years but instead I am trying to steer you to the sport of trampolining. Its fun, challenging and by the time you’re finished the only indication to yourself as to the amount of exercise you have done is through the patch of sweat on your back. There is an element of danger with this sport but then again which sport doesn’t involve some form of risk. Be brave and explore different varieties of exercise, keeping fit doesn’t always mean slogging it out in the gym.

minerals, water. When I say fruit, I am talking of botanical fruit, rather than “culinary” fruit i.e. juicy fruit such as pineapple or mango. Botanical fruit includes grains, nuts, juicy fruits, mushrooms, savoury fruits i.e. eggplant, peas, chickpeas, green beans, kidney beans, and eggs. This is not the absolute, overarching definition of “fruit”. As with most matters of this nature, there is disagreement. I experimented with a fruitarian in the holidays and found it rewarding. For one thing it is ridiculously difficult to find a prepared fruitarian meal in town, or presumably anywhere in the world for that matter. However it is quite possible to maintain a fruitarian diet on food from the supermarket. During my period of fruitarianism, I discovered many substitutes for everyday substances that are illicit on an all fruit diet. For instance, coconut cream is a great substitute for both milk and cream, particularly in coffee (which is made from beans). As said previously the core of fruitarian philosophy is not to be harming or destroying living entity, living things. Many fruitarians will not eat seeds, because that is destroying potential life (unless you live in the bush). Many fruitarians will not eat grains, such as wheat, because the plant itself is destroyed to garner the grain. Many fruitarians would not include eggs as fruit because they are from the animal kingdom, and see that as being significant. It is unclear whether products such as milk or honey are acceptable according to fruitarian philosophy, as it can be argued whether it is harmful (and a fruit is also fundamentally defined as that which grows into something living).


Which of these bands recently played in New Zealand?

Catherine Earnshaw is a character in which famous novel?

a) b) c) d)

a) b) c) d)

Thirty Seconds to Mars Temper Trap Florence + the Machine All of the above

The UAE and Saudi Arabia ordered its mobile operators to halt certain services on which smart phone last week? a) b) c) d)

iPhone Nokia N97 mini BlackBerry All of the above

Wuthering Heights Eva Luna Jane Eyre Oliver Twist

If you have Cibophobia, what do you have a fear of? a) b) c) d)

Hypnosis Food Wisdom Teeth Chlorine

How many calories are there in one Twinkie? When will the final instalment of the Twilight franchise be released in cinemas? a) b) c) d)

November 16, 2011 July 16, 2012 November 16, 2012 December 26, 2012

How many times has the Commonwealth Games been previously held in India? a) b) c) d)

None One Two Three

In terms of food, what does RDI stand for? a) b) c) d)

Required Dairy Intake Required Daily Intake Recommended Daily Intake Recommended Diet Intake

issue 17 AUG 2010

a) b) c) d)

100 150 200 250

Who is New Zealand’s Defence Minister? a) b) c) d)

Bill English Simon Power Chris Carter Wayne Mapp

Which celebrity has announced his candidacy to run for president of Haiti? a) b) c) d)

Leonardo DiCaprio Wyclef Jean Bono Lil Wayne

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Catching the bus is a part of most people’s daily routines. As much as we like to bitch and moan about how the bus is always late, the driver is a grump or the fact you never get a seat, in hindsight the bus is cost-effective, environmentally friendly and is a great place to catch up with your iPod and read debate. However, there are certain people that you may come across on your journey that spoil it for you. Or worse, you may BE one of these people (if you are shame on you).

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The Cell Phoner

This person who is constantly yabbering on their phone doesn’t give two shits about who is listening as they continue to fill the other person in about their weekend. I had a girl behind me once describing step by step how she was going to get to go out. No one cares, not even the person on the other end. Stop yelling down the phone and send a text message.

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The Loud Music Person

The majority of passengers on a bus are listening to some form of music player device. This is absolutely fine. If we can’t hear it, that is. I don’t want to hear your shitty music blaring from your headphones, which then forces me to turn my music up louder which then annoys the next person, thus creating a vicious cycle. Even worse are people playing music from their phones – keep that sort of behaviour at home, I’ve paid my $3.30 and I want to have some peace and quiet, thank you.

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The Talker

Once in a while, you board a bus and manage to score a seat all to yourself. You think all is well with the world and you will not be disrupted on this pleasant journey. Wrong. Someone boards the bus and picks the seat right next to you and strikes up a conversation. This is just a big bowl of wrong. They are usually of the elderly demographic group, and you fell a bit mean ignoring them. Well don’t, they need to learn the bus is a quiet place and not a social gathering at the bowls’ club.

7

The ‘Stop’ Prankster

This one annoys me especially, and happens at least once a day when I’m on the bus. The person who presses the stop button as a joke and pretends to look around when the bus comes to a stop. Thank you dickhead for wasting 7.5 seconds of mine and everyone else’s time.

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The Queue Jumper

You’ve finished all your lectures and just want to get the hell out of town. The bus pulls up and you and your fellow peers assemble quietly to get on. Except for one person. This person causes anarchy when they either push their way through the queue, or worse create their own queue on the opposite side of the original queue. Can you not? It just makes everyone hate you.

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5

The Bag Grazer

You’re sitting on the aisle seat when the bus pulls up and lets on a passenger with a huge handbag or briefcase. You know they will have to walk pass you so you lean in towards the window. Without fail, the Bag Grazer walks past and knocks you with their bag. To make matters worse, there are no available seats so they stand right next to you in the aisle, smashing you with their bag every time the bus moves. How about putting the bag on the floor? Maybe then I won’t have bruises from your lack of spatial judgement between your bag and my face.

4

The Seat Hogger

I think we have all been guilty of this one. We score a window seat and put our bag on the seat next to us, secretly hoping other people will walk past and find another seat. However, any normal person will move their bag once the bus is full. Not the seat hogger. This person is malicious. They sit on the aisle seat, leaving the window seat for their bag and/or folder and will not move over, even if the bus is full. One time I got on the bus and came face to face with a professional seat hogger who said they “were getting off at the next stop” and I could have their seat. Seat hoggers lie.

3

The Slow Fare Payer

Thankfully, students are pretty damn good with whipping out their bus cards and finding their seat quickly and quietly. However, we have some people boarding the bus who think “Oh, where is my wallet? Oh here it is. How much is one stage? Oh ok, 10 cents, 20..wait...30”. For heaven’s sake, have your coins ready before the bus comes.

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The Rude Youth

On your journey, you may have a delightful encounter with one of many loud school kids. Their big oversized sports bags and scrunchies fill up the seats and you sigh with relief when they begin to settle down. Until the bus drives past the next stop full of school kids, then all hell breaks loose. This isn’t a school bus, it’s a PUBLIC bus. Where are your manners? Also that pregnant woman and elderly gentleman who just boarded the bus need to sit down, so just fucking move.

1

The Stinky Person

It really is the last thing you need on a humid day in a bus with no windows and minimal air con to be sitting next to someone who smells. The worst is when it is first thing in the morning. Don’t people shower? What are they doing sweating this early in the morning? The best way to avoid The Stinky Person is to move to another seat or to stand.


Whatever fashionable clothes you’re wearing

hipsters looking to spout musical opinions at the next unintentional ugly sweater party. Other things that hipsters love are moustaches (ironic, of course), denigrating your musical taste and then your entire value system, and PBR. PBR stands for Pabst Blue Ribbon, once the sole property of the blue collar working class in America, and one of the cheapest and nastiest beers you can buy in the States. Now acquisitioned by hipsters, who are mostly white upper-middle class who are only too willing to be supported by mum and dad. But why? Because it’s ironic damn you, have you been taking any of this in? As with many subcultures, hipsters have raised a lot of ire, with many blogs being set up mainly to poke fun at the hipster culture. Latfh.com (Look at This Fucking Hipster), stuffhipstershate.tumblr.com, and fuckyeahhipsterkitty. tumblr.com are just a few of the blogs dedicated to mocking hipsters and all the things they love. As with many trends, hipsters are predominantly American, however you will probably come across a few in New Zealand. Swap the PBR with Lion Red, the American Apparel with your mum’s wardrobe from the 80s (even if you’re male), head to Cassette or an ironic dingy local dive and you’ve got yourself the Kiwi hipster.

Before becoming an avid sports fan eight years ago, my childhood and tween-age years revolved around listening to music on the radio, in CD stores or having sing-alongs on the TV (long before Singstar or Rock Band). Looking back at the 90s, Cantopop had shaped many Hong Kong people’s musical preferences, yet, nostalgic people like me ended up impersonating our childhood idols in various forms, much like how the voices of Michael Jackson and Elvis were a great role models for impersonation. Cantonese pop music (Cantopop) in Hong Kong reads like a who’s who of the industry. It was at its most dominant in the 80s due to the abundance of many legendary singers (who, unfortunately, many have either passed away during the early 2000’s or emigrated before the Handover of Sovereignty in 1997). That decade also laid the foundation for the development of Cantonese lyrics, which, given the tightly tonal nature of the language, was not easy to compose. Although Sam Hui was widely regarded as the greatest Cantopop singer-songwriter from that decade, the contributions of composer such as Joseph Koo, and the late actor/lyricist James Wong kept going strong well into the late 90s. Cantopop has long been dominated by lyricists, especially Edmond Leung and Wyman Wong throughout the 90s and last decade because many songs have borrowed melodies from Japanese or English songs. It was until a protest in 1995 to encourage more local composers that more variety was provided. Another characteristic was that most songs are sung as a solo or a duet because there weren’t many bands or groups, and the melodies are quite simple with relatively uncomplicated musical arrangements.

pop (Mandopop) and movies), Leon Lai (for his rising fan base) beat out Hacken Lee in record sales (who was in the same record company as Jacky, but was suffering a career slump at an inopportune time), and Aaron Kwok found success in Taiwan as a singer rather than a dancer, then carried that form to make a successful comeback. By the award ceremonies of 1992, the songs by four artists occupied seven of 10 “Songs of the Year” spots. In 1994, those 10 songs were dominated by songs sung by Jacky and Andy alone! Such plethora of accolades and dominance by the four artists continued well until the mid 1990s. Even when Lau, then Cheung and Lai announced their absence from awards ceremonies, their individual works on musicals and movies have still exerted great influence in the South East Asian entertainment markets until 2008.

–It’s not cool enough. Whatever music you’re into –They discovered and ditched it first. Whatever beer you’re drinking –It’s not ironic enough. These are some of the traits of the dismissive hipster. First coined in the 1940s to mean a lover of jazz, and then evolving into someone of the beatnik generation noted for such contemporaries such as Kerouac and Ginsberg, the term hipster has since evolved to mean someone whose disdain by the general public used to be earned by emo kids. Rising out of the last two decades of subculture, hipsters spend most of their time scrupulously choosing their clothes, accessories, music and movie tastes, and even beer, to give off the image that they just don’t care. Vintage and op shops are rummaged through to find the perfect retro outfit and when that doesn’t suffice, American Apparel calls to the alt masses with their shapeless clothes with their terrible, terrible prints. After donning their wayfarers and old-school cameras, the next important thing is music. This is even more defining than your first name (which you will probably change to an upper-white middle class name that was popular 10 years ago because it is so ironic). Vampire Weekend –you mean you still listen to them? God their debut album was just so bullshit and what was up with them signing to a label? MGMT, once a hipster darling is hanging by a thread. Bombay Bicycle Club, Tin Man, Forest Swords – never heard of them? Good, because that’s the way they like it. Pitchfork, a website devoted to rating albums depending on how close they get to Radiohead, is a safe bet for

The Four Heavenly Kings With the retirements or Sam Hui, and other legendary singers like “principal” Alan Tam, Priscilla Chan becoming less active, a void is opened for other singers to fill the market. Mona Fong coined the term The Four Heavenly Kings late in 1991. While there was no dispute over Jacky Cheung (for his music) and Andy Lau (for his contributions in Mandarin issue 17 AUG 2010

Other notable singers

bands

and

While the 90s were dominated by male artists, Grasshoppers (photo left), originally a dancing trio group and Beyond, Hong Kong’s most influential rock band in the early 90s, provided some relief from a male-dominated pop culture until it was forced to disband due to the passing of the lead singer/songwriter. Female artists have far less influence in the Cantopop market. While Faye Wong was the only exception, as she became a queen of Mandopop before Mandarin was adopted as an official language, other great female singers like Vivian Chow and Shirley Kwan never reached the success that they deserved.

After 1997 Much has changed from 1997 onwards, from an injection of singersongwriters to an increase in girl bands, and a much like how the Handover of Sovereignty impacted Hong Kong in a political sense. While the singers have changed, and while the landscape has changed, the lyrics of Leung and Wong will continue to top the charts for a while yet.

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I have recently found out some nasty home

truths. Nobody likes to hear it straight; it’s part of the human condition to never want to deal with conflict directly. People prefer instead to hear bad or upsetting things in these overly convoluted hypotheticals or “what if we try this for a while” situations. It seems fair to avoid conflict. It’s part of a utilitarian view of life that you should seek out happiness and joy and try to minimise pain and suffering. Philosophy 101 for you cats. But anyhow, these home truths were not only about me, but also my parents, my family and even some close friends. It all just sort of hit me in a torrent of crappy information. Throughout those dark days I learnt a couple of very important things. 1. Bad stuff really does pile up. In a copious amount of bad stuff, it’s almost like those comical situations where you clean the house by shoving everything in a closet, only to have your mother/partner/landlord open it and it all come rolling on top of you in a wave. Then just when it’s all done here comes the bowling ball! It seems as though the bad things gang up. Like when you have a run of a really great couple of days when everything falls your way, then in a moment of silence your brain chips in saying “Hey, now this awesome stuff has happened you do realise nothing good can happen for a while, and even average stuff will now never be as awesome”. Just to kick a person while they’re down. Stupid brains and their emotional rationality. 2. Overused clichés like “What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger” are so very, very true. Everyone has a crappy day, week or month but more often than not we survive. We keep going; we find something that keeps it all in perspective and just live through it. This was a massive change from whenever I used to hear this I’d say “unless in your near death situation you had severe muscle wastage, whereby you would most certainly be weaker than prior to the death defying situation” (I’m very difficult, and a bit of a dick). 3. Country/blues music actually helps. Just to clarify, I’m not talking Dolly Parton here, I’m talking Jackson Browne, Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, Lyle Lovett. It seems to be a prescribed situation that to be a country musician you have to have had some really shitty stuff happen, like lose your wife, farm, car, job and dog in one day. Then the next song is followed by some crooning about a great date and beautiful women. Their lives seem to be nothing but emotional roller coasters with great accompanying soundtracks. The best part about them is you know it’s oh so true. You can go see a live blues band and think hey, they were not half bad, but then you see the homeless guy who hangs near Ma Higgins baring his soul through that harmonica and you know he is playing some real blues.

24

ea ls

M

ls

by Ben Hope

, s l Hee

gD ea

li n

But hey! That’s just what I think

&

Se a

by Elana Kluner

My friend was at a work party the other

night when she spotted a cute guy out of the corner of her eye. She asked her co-worker who is was and her co-worker replied “Marty”.

“Marty what?” she questioned.

“Yea, that’s him!” her co-worker confirmed.

“Huh? No… what’s his last name?”

“Yea, Watts is his last name.”

They both had a chuckle and the co-worker introduced my friend to Marty. They hit it off right away and after a few drinks, they exchanged numbers. A few days later, my friend sent him a text to see if he wanted to catch up on the weekend. The text read “burritos Friday night?” She received a text back that said, “Mmm… that sounds good, but I think you have the wrong number”. Apparently, my friend had typed a three instead of a six at the end of his number by mistake. She wrote back to the mystery person, “Oh, I’m sorry. I meant to text someone named Marty”. Moments later she received a response that said, “That’s okay. I’m just jealous. My name’s Jeff”. After hearing this story I couldn’t help but wonder; could meeting him by mistake be fate? Maybe it’s true what they say, ‘they come when you least expect it’. All of the failed blind dates and all of the awkward set ups are just pointless. If you plan it, it won’t work. But if you trip over your $200 heels in the middle of an intersection and everything in your bag scatters across the ground, then the guy who’s crossing the other way and trips over your makeup bag could possibly be the one! I know this is a little extreme because there are plenty of working relationships that have started another way, but I think it’s fair to say that this may be very possible. Jeff and my friend ended up texting back and forth the rest of that day and found a lot in common. They talked about how funny and random it would be if something came out of this. She never ended up texting Marty and he did the same in return. She did think Marty was cute and kind and thought it would be nice to go out on a date with him, but she found the whole situation with Jeff far more intriguing. She knew that it had to have happened for a reason. In 1886, a man by the name of John Pemberton was concocting a medical substance in his backyard that was supposed to help people with their nerves and headaches. He accidently mixed it with carbonated water instead of still water. This mistake lead him to inventing what is now one the most successful companies in the world, Coca Cola. Could it be that relationships work the same way? If you get mixed up with a different person then you intended, could it potentially turn into a successful relationship? Could my friend and her ‘mistake textee’ Jeff work out? Maybe the wrong number turned out to be the right number after all!


neet's totally metal On the 14th of July I was travelling from New

York to Washington DC; this turned out to be the perfect day to do it as this was the date Soilwork was set to play the Jaxx nightclub in Virginia. A good friend of mine is one of the managers there. You know a concert is going to go well when you don’t even have to pay for a ticket to start with. I arrived at the venue at around five o’clock, and had been instructed to simply walk past the line of people and straight in the front doors. The jealous stares felt good, I have to say. As I was already inside the venue when the meet and greet started, I got to walk straight on into it. I managed to get my hands on a rather nice Soilwork poster signed by the entire band, as well as a guitar pick, sticker and ‘VIP’ pass (which I didn’t need). Unfortunately the sticker and pass were subsequently lost by the wonderful ground staff of either Emirates or V Australia. Thanks heaps guys. When I packed my suitcase almost a month before hand, I had completely forgotten about this concert, so the best shoe choice I had was some roman sandals. There was no way I was going near the pit in those. So after the meet and greet I found myself a nice safe spot close to the merch tables to watch a few of the warm up acts. The first warm up act was a local band, Cab Ride Home, whose guitarist happened to also be a friend of mine. They were followed by pirate metal band Swashbuckle, whose set included a parrot and a shark appearing on stage (my friend was the parrot). Continuing the opening acts were Mutiny Within, who started off as a Children of Bodom cover band. This could explain why I was quite impressed with. Lastly was Death Angel who were also really good live. After Swashbuckle I had headed up to the crow’s nest to watch the rest of the bands, my poor feet couldn’t face standing anymore. More free drinks continued up there. I highly recommend to everyone to become friends with a manager at a venue, it makes everything more awesome. Being in the crow’s nest meant I had an awesome view of everything, and was perfect with my lack of proper shoes. I’ve never had the opportunity to see Soilwork live, so I was quite excited when their set began. I’m not a huge fan of them, but I do enjoy a lot of their music. I can say that they put on a very good live show with lots of interaction with the audience. Concerts are terribly hard to photograph if you don’t have good equipment, so most of my photos were pretty average, but I included one that turned out alright so you can get an idea of what the concert was like.

issue 17 AUG 2010

by Frances Gordon

People who have curly hair want straight

hair. Those who are short wish they could be a little bit taller. Fair people wish they could tan with out looking like a beetroot. It always works like that – you always want something you don’t have. In the weeks leading up to my departure from New Zealand I was yearning for some sunshine. I remember one day in particular. I was walking from campus down Wellesley St and the rain was absolutely hammering down – the water had soaked through my boots, my feet and socks were drenched and I smelt like a wet dog. During my walk down Wellesley there was only one thought running through my mind that whole time. Two more weeks. You only have two more weeks. Now I’m in Columbia, Missouri and it seems I’ve gone from one extreme to another. Sure – there’s no fog, no cold and no dark nights. But that has all been replaced by blistering heat and humidity so high it would ruin any GHD perfected hair do. Midwestern weather is crazy, unpredictable and extreme. In the five days I’ve been here I’ve had winds so strong I’ve nearly been blown over, hail stones the size of 50c pieces, rain so heavy and thick I haven’t been able to see two feet in front of me, and of course the heat. Oh, the heat. I don’t think I can explain how hot it is here – with temperatures at between 35-40 degrees on any given day it certainly has been a shock to the system and I’ve still got at least two months of this. Then there are the thunderstorms – another thing the Midwest is known for, along with their tornados. While I am yet to feature in any upcoming reality TV shows on extreme weather, I did experience my first Midwestern summer squall. I was completely oblivious to the approaching bad weather. I had gone out for ice cream with a friend. When we left, there was nothing to suggest we were about to be attacked by Columbia’s bipolar climate – the skies were blue, the sun was out and the air was still. By the time we walked out of the ice cream parlour, the sky was full of ominous black clouds and the winds were so strong I had to fight my way to the car. About two minutes after that the rain came, pummelling us. Two minutes after that came the storm. By the time I arrived home, I was drenched head to toe and I smelt like wet dog – just like I had been walking down Wellesley. I had quite literally come full circle from where I’d been a few weeks ago. It seems wherever I go, no matter how hard I try; I’m not going to escape what I think I’m leaving behind.

25


Dear Agony Aunt My boyfriend hit me last night. I am devastated! I can’t believe it, I love him so much but I don’t think I can forgive him. How could he do this to me? He has not stopped saying sorry since but I don’t trust him anymore. We have been together for four months, I really thought it was the real thing. I’m a mess. From Anonymous Dear Anonymous, My advice is to get rid of him. This behaviour is not okay. If he is treating you like this after four months who knows what he might do in the future. I know it hurts when someone you think you love and trust lets you down in such a humiliating way, but in time you will get over him. Be strong, trust your instinct and do the right thing for yourself. If you need help to get through this you can see a counsellor free at Health Counselling and Wellbeing . Call (09) 921 9992 for City or (09) 921 9998 for North Shore for more details. For help contact: Stopping violence Services: 0800 478 778 Preventing Violence Crisis Line: (09) 303 3939 Youthline: 0800 376 633

Dear Agony Aunt I think my friend had her drink spiked at a club last week. I know she wasn’t drunk because we were broke and couldn’t afford much to drink. All of a sudden she started acting really weird, like falling over and slurring. It was so bad she didn’t know where she was or anything. We took her home and put her to bed. I was really scared and didn’t know whether to call an ambulance or not. In the end I stayed up all night with her in case she choked or something. She was very upset the next day and couldn’t remember anything. From Worried Dear Worried Sounds like you could be right. You did the right thing by staying with her, who knows what could have happened if you had left her alone. Some drugs can make you feel sleepy, drowsy, uninhibited and open to suggestion. This makes you very vulnerable and you are at great risk of sexual assault or rape. You should always be wary of your drink being spiked. It only takes a second to drop an aspirin sized pill, some power or a few drops of liquid into your drink. If it ever happens again don’t be afraid to call 111 and ask for an ambulance. Don’t let it spoil your fun in the future, just be mindful of the risks when you are out having a good time. For more information on drink spiking and how to say safe go to: www.police.govt.nz www.reachout.com

by Tamsyn Solomon

When you are browsing on the internet, and find yourself bored-to-death, have you ever wondered if there is any website that could get you hooked for a long, long time? A place where knowledge is served with attitude and a side of kick ass humour? There is such a place, and a name so well suited for it www.cracked.com. It’s a ranking list, article, video and comic site, of every ounce of whatever you want to know you could possibly come up with. No, really, anything. From “Six Japanese Subcultures That are Insane (Even For Japan)” and “How to Subtly Tell Someone They’re Creeping You Out”. They have a handy search bar to look up any topic and have loads of material to laugh and learn about for hours. Each part is done by different writers and artists so you could always find the professional ones and the teenage angst ones, whichever you prefer. Also, when I say hours, I don’t mean one or two, I mean four or five...each article ends with a related article that just keeps going, thirsting for more LOLs and knowledge about the pointlessness of a lot of things and the impressiveness of others. There are also handy articles for art and design students for serious study such as the article “10 Video Games That Should Be Considered Modern Art” and “Six Movie Formulas That Must Be Stopped”. Okay, maybe not too serious study, but still, some really good points are made. Visit cracked.com. Go on. Try it. You won’t regret it.

26


ARIES (March 21-April 19) Eat healthy this week! The cheapest way is to steal fruit off your neighbour’s trees. The most fun way is to steal cereal from your neighbour’s kitchen.

words by

Tenani French

ILLustrations

Samantha M

by

cSkimming

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Authority figures will get on your case this week, particularly your parents. Be nice to them and money will come your way. Sorry if you don’t have parents.

Visit Auckland Museum

When was the last time you went to Auckland Museum? High School history field trip? Primary school science? Get your ass down there, they’ve done it up since then and not only is it flash but it’s FREE for Aucklanders! Fuck. Yes. Whoever came up with that clever idea should be knighted and then immediately immortalised with a wax figure at the museum.

GEMINI (May 21-June 21) There will NEVER be a better time to start up that business you’ve always dreamed of. Look to elderly people for initial investments.

CANCER (June 22-July 22) Your word of the week is streamline. Streamline everything. With labels.

Writing for uni mags

Seriously, I have to write one column a week and get showered with gifts and freebies left, right and centre. Okay, that may be a little bit of an exaggeration but there are a lot of people willing to help you out if you say you write for a uni mag. You also get the immense pleasure of being able to write whatever the fuck you want with minimal editorial censorship (love you Sam). So get a’writing and send your shit in to debate, it’ll be the start of something marvellous.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) You need some new t-shirts.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Contrary to popular belief, KFC is a brilliant choice for dinner. It will be a dietary requirement this weekend.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) It seems that you will lose your phone this week. Unfortunate.

BigLittleCity.co.nz

I recently had some friends visiting Auckland and typically the weather turned to crap and we were stuck inside, rain pounding the window and wondering what to do. In comes Google which sends us to BigLittleCity.co.nz. IT HAS FREE COUPONS! Sign up for the email updates and you’ll get vouchers for things around the city sent to your inbox, as well as receiving info about shit to do in Auckland. Invaluable if, like me, you find yourself trying to entertain erratic Dunedin students on holiday.

SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21) To save money this week, tear pages out of other people’s entertainment books – the ones with all the vouchers.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Sagittarius – Drink eight glasses of water a day and your creative juices will flow. Drink eight big cans of Red Bull and you’ll go into cardiac arrest.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) If you’re a smoker, stop smoking! If you’re not, don’t be so smug.

Ice skating

I seriously can’t remember the last time I went ice skating, it was possibly somewhere around my 12th birthday, and I was possibly dressed like a little girl with a big princess dress and a tiara. Long story. Fancy dress party gone wrong. Anyway I really want to go ice skating, it’s been far too long and after a quick look at the website I’ve found out it’s only $15.50 for us old people. Cheap! Hit up Paradice Ice Skating, you might find me there (minus the tiara). If there’s something you think the student masses of AUT need to know about, send us an email to debate@aut.ac.nz with Suggestions in the subject line.

issue 17 AUG 2010

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) People are laughing at your lack of style. If you want to lead a happy love life, you have to use more hair gel.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) Never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise. Yeah, I gave up too.

27


I

n 1998, New York based fashion designer Helmut Lang made fashion history. Days before showing his new collection to the usual New York Fashion Week audience of buyers, editors etc, he launched his new collection online for everyone in cyberspace to see. Since then, the fashion industry has never been the same. Following in Lang’s footsteps, the rest of the industry followed suit, and began to recognise the internet for the incredibly powerful medium that it was. American, European, British and Japanese designers have all embraced the internet as a form of advertising. Designers began creating websites of their own which showcased their collections. Then websites dedicated solely to fashion went up, such as Vogue Magazine’s online counterpart, style.com. All of these developments meant that for the first time, fashion was as easily and immediately accessible to everyone with access to the internet anywhere in the world. The immediacy of fashion increased beyond anything before. It changed the way fashion was marketed to the public as well. It used to be that haute couture (specially made to measure clothing that only the richest of the rich can dream of affording) was designed to be sold and worn by the fashionable elite. Now thanks to the power of the internet, a designer’s haute couture collection is posted online with the hopes that it will inspire the everyday customer to by from their cheaper Pret-a-porter lines. When it comes to shopping on the internet, the mother-of-all online stores must be the fashion Mecca, Net-a-Porter.com. It was created in 2000 by Natalie Massenet, and has since become one of the biggest online retailers the world over. The average price on Net-a-Porter is around $NZ1080. It may seem strange that there are so many people around the world willing to spend so much money on something cannot even physically touch, let alone try on. But Net-a-Porters success speaks for itself. Every order arrives beautifully packaged in a white box tied with black ribbon. It harks back to the days when buying new clothes was a real occasion, and it would arrive beautifully packaged and hand delivered to your front door. Topshop.com is another big online fashion retailer. Previously only available in the UK, Topshop, the cult store and fashion label has long been lusted after by the rest of the globe. Now they deliver to most places in the world (including New Zealand). This is another advantage of fashion being sold on the internet. What was previously only available to a few people, can now be brought by anyone with a credit card. Fashion is beginning to loose its elitism and become more democratic. The most recent phenomenon in the internet/fashion relationship is internet blogging. Ordinary people such as Jane Aldridge of www.seaofshoes. com and Tavi Gevinson of thestylerookie.com have created such a following of their fashion blogs that even the fashion designers are giving them front row seats, much to the dismay of many magazine editors of course. Understandably of course, for the first time the fashion magazines have some serious competition in the form of these fashion-obsessed teenage girls. The internet has given fashion journalism free rein and absolutely anyone who has something to say can say it. AUT student and fashion blogger Petra Benton (www.cityofpetra.blogspot.com and www.detourthroughwonderland. blogspot.com) has had her page mentioned in Viva magazine and has viewers worldwide. Even though she is currently taking a break from blogging to adjust to her university workload I asked her to describe her experience of fashion and the internet:

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Why did you decide to start an online fashion blog? I had been looking at a whole bunch of fashion blogs and was so inspired by what I found. One day on a whim I just decided to start my own and join in the fun. There have been ups and downs with it though, as it takes a lot of time and commitment to continue a blog. Since switching degrees this year I have had a hiatus of sorts from cityofpetra in order to sort my time allocations out. But I am currently working on returning to posting photographs and giving the blog a bit of a fresh start. How do you think the internet has changed the way people view fashion in terms of the freedom people have to create their own blogs? I think the internet has most definitely made fashion a lot more accessible. No longer do you have to be part of an elite group in order to view collections. As a result I feel people feel more comfortable with fashion and expressing their ideas in relation to it. It is so easy to start a blog and is such an immediate means of expressing yourself and your opinion. This has been particularly advantageous in the United States where popular and influential bloggers are being recognised by fashion houses and magazines. As a result they have established their own positions in the fashion world. How has the internet changed the way people approach shopping for clothing? I think fashion blogs have been wonderful in inspiring people to create their own personal style through experimentation. Seeing ‘normal’ people who are not dressed by stylists and who for the most part do not have huge bank accounts is more relatable that looking at figures in magazines. Clothing companies have also recognised this influence, and as a result are advertising on blogs. In terms of online shopping the impact is immense. The freedom and accessibility it has established allows a person living in New Zealand to purchase shoes from places such as America where previously they wouldn’t have means to access such products. How has the internet changed the ‘speed’ or ‘pace’ of fashion? In terms of northern influence on southern hemisphere fashion, I believe the pace has quickened dramatically. Where previously it would take a few seasons for European fashion trends to trickle down into New Zealand, currently the turn around is relatively instantaneous, particularly through chain stores who pounce on northern trends immediately. International magazine editorials are posted online immediately, fashion shows are uploaded right after they occur, and online shopping allows pieces from such shows to be purchased as soon as they are retail-ready from virtually anywhere in the world. Any other thoughts on technology or fashion? From the speed in which the internet has influenced fashion in the past few years, it will be fascinating to see where it goes from here. The increasing influence previously ‘normal’ people are having on the fashion set is inspiring to see, and it is wonderful to see the opportunities that are arising. Other than that, fashion is fun, and the internet only provides a means for more fun to be had!


Kate Hayden

Vanessa

Rupert

Diploma of Fashion Technology (2nd Year)

Bachelor of Business (3rd Year)

Bachelor of Communication Studies

Everything from Hong Kong

Dress: Sister’s from op shop Tights: Max Shoes: Banks shoes

Jeans: Hallensteins Hoody: Can’t remember Underwear: Stolen from hotel room Leather belt: Customised T-shirt: Present

Many people already know of the delights of Torpedo 7. You may get their daily emails telling you of the weekly or

even daily specials. I must say, I am ever so tempted to whip out my credit score! I move on to the snow section and I can get clothes, goggles, tuning card every time that email comes through. But even if I don’t I still click on gear and protection… I wonder what protection I need for snowboarding? it and waste at least 10 minutes looking at all of the products. So what is Oh, it turns out to be a bit boring – helmets, wrist guards, knee pads…hold Torpedo 7 you say? Well it’s a NZ retail website that is sports focused. When on a second…then I find hip pads, impact shorts and a neck guard, now that’s you open up the homepage they have their weekly specials up the top, with more interesting! I’m not ever going to show my mum this page or else she the list of sports to the left and ads below that. Your choices of sports are Bike, would never want me to go snowboarding again! Snow, Motocross, Adventure and then there is the Clearance section. Nice. I The motocross section offers up bike parts and clothing as well as more deftly enter each one, just for you! protective gear and so I move on to the adventure section. I mean what could I click on the bike section and clothing (I like clothing ok) and what I be more adventurous than the other sections? Tents apparently, oh, and see are little pictures representing each clothing category and then a list of climbing accessories. There are some pretty snazzy karabiners. Right, so, fail. the brands for each next to it. For some reason this annoys me. I don’t even I’ve made this site sound really awful, but I know that I love it! I set out finally know half of the brands in the list…should I? I realise though that you can get to find the cool stuff and I hear a little sound in my head, like angels singing, some really good stuff. There is road and mountain bike stuff, and clothes for is as I find what I’m looking for…they have helmet cameras, totally hands free, guys and girls. Even though it’s meant to be for sports, there are street clothes waterproof and shock proof for under $200. Imagining the possibilities for thrown in too which I’m glad to see; you can get great Fox shoes from $60, YouTube; I know what I’m going to be asking for my birthday. This review was written by a graduate in Retailing. If you are interested in retail and why people buy, take a look at papers in the Retail major in the Business School. You don’t have to be a business student to take the papers, so check out the website today! issue 17 AUG 2010

29


My Own Private Amsterdam Pistol Youth

Florence + the Machine Live at Trust Stadium, Thursday July 29

CD Review by Mike Atkins

Live Review by Samantha McQueen

It was only six months ago that audiences were

I

came

across

a

listicle

once

of

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good

albums that would’ve made great EPs. The albums on the list were ones where only half the songs were great, and if you excised the non-great ones, you’d have a great half-album. Except EPs don’t really work that way. Rather than being half an album of great songs, they’re more an album of half great songs. The reason is obvious, you save your A-material for the album proper. An EP is for showing what you can do, without necessarily putting all the pieces together. Given that model, My Own Private Amsterdam sounds like an EP – for an album, it’s pretty lacklustre. It’s suggestive of an EP because there are elements of something better, but those elements are only ever put together in the most unimaginative way. Similarly the lyrics are phoned in; they flirt with good ideas, only to cop out, or go full-on stupid in the next line. When you’re faced with something that’s not very good, it’s a bold claim to say “these guys could do better”, after all, if they could, why didn’t they? That logic in that question is undeniable, so I don’t know what their real potential is, they just certainly give the impression that they could’ve done better (hence: the EP analogy). The opening single Frankfurt has a pleasing melodic swing, which would be very suggestive of the first tentative steps of great songwriters, if it weren’t followed by 12 pieces of filler. The really frustrating thing is that they seem to have treated the rock genre like a pack of cards to shuffle randomly. When a combination works, it still feels about as skillful as getting a good hand in poker. The heartbreaking first verse of In My Eyes is like an ace of spades being paired with a two of diamonds in that thuggish bass. To add insult to injury, In My Eyes’ follow-up is the joker of the pack, Fragile. To say “all the elements are there” is more condemnation than faint cause for hope, because the beauty of rock is that the people who do it well, and the people who do it badly are using exactly the same elements, and instruments – the same deck. The fact that these guys couldn’t assemble a good hand, despite using all of the cards is what stands out. And they did use all the cards; the influences shown here cover everything from Jeff Buckley, to 90s Aerosmith, and everything that could be described as being in between. A lot what goes on here is just downright unearned. Since Nirvana made it their own, it’s very difficult to pull off the loud-quiet-loud thing without it sounding like a cheap copy. Pistol Youth aren’t even up to that problem; they haven’t earned the hard-edged effect that pulling it off would’ve earned them. It’s the same principle, but worse when they do the grunge goes epic thing. I was a little uncomfortable writing a review this negative, but even by the lenient standards that my wussiness causes, there isn’t much to like.

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given their first taste of Florence Welch and her machine, when she headlined Laneway Festival, but that didn’t stop audiences flocking to Trust Stadium to watch one of the brightest stars in music at the moment. Walking into the stadium, you were instantly surrounded by laces, sparkles, long flowing dresses and plaid (for the lads); an unspoken dress code that seems to have filtered around fans. There was a dedicated group already hovering by the stage, and they are treated to local darlings The Naked and Famous, who have been riding the wave of success themselves lightly. Sound issues prevented them from really making an impact, but their closer, Young Blood, roused a response that has you feeling all patriotic. New York City four-piece The Drums were up next, and it was obvious from the mostly female screams that they were a big deal, even though they are yet to hit it big in New Zealand. While they may have been primly dressed, from the moment the first note was struck, all hell broke loose. Lead singer Jonathan Pierce gyrates around his microphone like it is a sensual lady, and he had promised her a good time. But the real stud of the band is guitarist Jacob Graham, who manically jumps around with a tambourine, making it look like the coolest instrument in the world. Their songs weren’t half bad either, and the soft sing-alongs from the centre of the crowd proved they have the fan base here. But as soon as the floral background and bird cages emerged from the black curtain, all that mattered was Florence, who gracefully took the stage in a flowing black dress –complete with cape, bare feet and hair as fiery as ever. Drumming Song kicked things off and right from the start, it was clear her debut album Lungs doesn’t do her voice justice. Watching Florence perform is like watching an ethereal being. The way she twirled around the stage during various numbers while staying pitch perfect left many in the audience star struck. Cosmic Love saw her voice soar to levels not heard on her album. Softer numbers like Between Two Lungs and I’m Not Calling You A Liar were haunting, and her operatic voice filled every crevice of the largely filled stadium. When she stops to speak to the audience (where she name drops Real Groovy) you’re left stunned that a voice that soft could produce such power. Audiences were also treated to an unreleased track, Strangeness and Charm, which features a heavier guitar sound from her machine. Going from something from spooky to high-pitched primal screams and microphone tricks in one of the biggest hits of the night – Rabbit Heart – proved this girl has got serious talent. Her set ran for just under 90 minutes, which included cult-like chants for an three song encore. The surprisingly unrecognised Heavy In Your Arms (from the recent Twilight soundtrack) had the audience fairly placid before a large drum solo saw Florence bursting into Kiss With A Fist, with enough gusto to make anyone believe that a fist in the mouth was a good thing. Dog Days Are Over, the final song of the night, was drawn out into a six minute epic, complete with an audience jump. The audience were her puppets, and Florence + the Machine was the puppeteer.


Killers Directed by Robert Luketic Film Review by Samantha McQueen

Killers, the latest directorial offering from Robert Luketic (Legally Blonde) seems to be confused about what genre it’s supposed to be. Luketic is no stranger to the romantic comedy genre, having directed Katherine Heigl in The Ugly Truth last year. However, the fine line between romantic comedy and action seems to be too much for him to handle. Don’t be surprised if you think you’ve seen it before; Killers is a familiar mixture of Date Night (but with less laughs), Mr and Mrs Smith (but with no aggressive sexual tension) and Knight and Day (but with a younger, more attractive duo). However, it does provide some standout performances from Tom Selleck’s Magnum P.I. moustache and Ashton Kutcher’s perfectly sculpted abs. Heigl is Jen, a recently single control freak who is on vacation with her parents in Nice, France. While riding the elevator to her room, she encounters a shirtless Spencer (Kutcher), who woos her with his fluent French and boyish charm. Little does she know, he is an undercover government assassin who wants out of the game for the chance of normalcy in suburbia with Jen. Fastforward three years later and he seems to have gotten his wish; he is working as a building contractor, living behind a white picket fence and is all chummy with the neighbourhood gang. However, the morning after his 30th birthday, Jen and Spencer learn he is the target for a $20 million dollar hit, and apparently everyone – including his best friend – is out to get him. Cue high speed chases, incessant arguments with Jen and a pregnancy test discussion with Usher, in the weirdest cameo I have seen in recent years. Those hoping to see Katherine Heigl (27 Dresses, Knocked Up) play a character that isn’t an overachieving, play-it-safe goofball will be disappointed in Killers. The saddest part is, it’s not even close to being as humorous as her previous efforts. Her neurosis, which audiences loved in 27 Dresses, has been replaced with an irritating clumsiness and an over emphasis on her chest assets. It seems weird that a woman whose father is a keen skeet shooter would have no idea how to handle a gun. Kutcher (What Happens in Vegas, Valentine’s Day) proves he can make the shift from oversized kid dodging responsibility to doting husband with impressive shooting accuracy. If Luketic got anything right in this film, it is the way Kutcher is displayed on screen. He renovates his wife’s office as a surprise, even though it is his birthday. He flatters all women, but ignores all of their advances. He can pull off red tinted aviators when standing next to Selleck. Plus, the amount of skin that flashes across the screen is enough to make female audience members forget that the pace is plodding and the lines are coated in cringes and cheese. His role is to make women swoon. And my, how he succeeds. However, the standout performance is from comedian Catherine O’Hara, who takes a stereotypical role like the alcoholic mother and turns it into something this film needed more of – laughs. Heigl and Kutcher light up on screen together, but even this undeniable chemistry can’t save this generic action comedy from plunging head first into “worst films of 2010 list”.

issue 17 AUG 2010

You Love You Semi Precious Weapons CD Review by Mike Atkins

I heard a story once that Bono chose the track

order to The Joshua Tree by listing the tracks from best to worst, and just going with it. I think Semi Precious Weapons did the opposite. The record starts with something that sounds like that insufferable Australian AC/ DC covers band, as the world’s most unconvincing drag queens, and ends with something that can favourably be compared to The Smiths’ Sing Me To Sleep, but by someone who’s not trying to be off-putting. The way it builds up imperceptibly slowly from one extreme to the other could be described as masterful, if it hadn’t resulted in only half a good album. I couldn’t really tell you where the divide between good and evil occurs, since there really isn’t one. This review could be reduced to “dumb-smart = track one, dumb-dumb = tracks two and three, fun-dumb = tracks five and six, smart-dumb = tracks four and eight, and smart-smart tracks seven and nine. I suppose the first track that’s not painful is Statues of Ourselves (track four), with its cabaret-style bass and slow-burn lyrics. Statues of Ourselves may be the point where things get fun, but you still have to have a high tolerance for things that haven’t exactly been popular lately, like fakeness, and glam-excess. Even in its good period, dumb is very much a factor. It’s only when they forget to wink ironically with the dumb, to show you they don’t really mean it, that it’s a problem. Although they’re particularly susceptible to that sort of thing, since they share Lady Gaga’s (she’s their executive producer and their mentor in the art of not wearing pants) propensity to forget what a performance is, and what’s not. If they were just having a dumb day when they did those off tracks, then that became part of the performance, and that’s what got recorded. Ironically, this gives them a startlingly deep level of honesty for a band whose lead singer is wearing a wife beater with the word “fake” on it on the front cover (actually, that could be “face”, but “fake” makes more sense). Probably the biggest problem with Semi Precious Weapons is that they sound like a very conventional heavy rock band. Don’t get me wrong, they do it well (when they do do it well), but for people with such a well defined image, and who are reviving a genre that’s been persona non grata for well over 20 years, you’d expect something a little more out there. At the risk of sounding reductive, the tracks cry out for an epic layering of strings, or some falsettos or even just some spacey electronics. The old rock sound just doesn’t do justice to what they’re trying to do. It’s laudable, their attempts to do something great with such a limited palette, but the fact they haven’t made something great, makes that (probably deliberate) handicap seem silly and unnecessary. The better tracks show they have the control and understanding of camp aesthetics to have made something truly great if they hadn’t restricted themselves. The best track demonstrates that, and what the whole thing could’ve been. It’s called Leave Your Pretty To Me, and it sounds like something off Exile On Mainstreet, by way of the 80s new romantics. Except, it builds to a level of pillowy excess that even Avalon-era Roxy music would’ve found hard to justify. It’s worth the price of admission alone. If only the rest of the record could’ve been like that.

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he t t o Sp e c n e r Diffe

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Tama Rawhiti City campus BA in Criminology When was the last time you went for a run? Back in high school (oh the shame!) If you had $10 left to last you until the end of the week, what would you spend it on? Probably spend it on food or gas. What are your thoughts on the government not supporting a GST cut for healthy foods? It’s a safe move. It would be too difficult to categorise the different food and it’s easier when it’s simple and there’s low admin costs. Mr Key knows what he’s doing! If you could be number one at any sport in the world, what would it be and why? Rowing because it’s an intense sport and a mean workout McDonalds, BK, Wendys or Burgerfuel? Wendys wins hands down

Romelo Joseph City campus Bachelors in Business When was the last time you went for a run? Does running down Queen St. for the train count? If you had $10 left to last you until the end of the week, what would you spend it on? Subway sandwiches and/or coffee What are your thoughts on the government not supporting a GST cut for healthy foods? They don’t want us to be healthy...or something like that If you could be number one at any sport in the world, what would it be and why? F1 car driver (I hope it counts as a sport)... adrenaline pumping, fast cars, $$ and hot girls! McDonalds, BK, Wendys or Burgerfuel? Burger Fuel all the way!

Matt Hollier City campus Bachelors in Business When was the last time you went for a run? Would be a year or two ago. If you had $10 left to last you until the end of the week, what would you spend it on? Go home for all meals and probably waste it on something What are your thoughts on the government not supporting a GST cut for healthy foods? Didn’t even know this was happening... High hopes for the business degree. If you could be number one at any sport in the world, what would it be and why? Pool or Table Tennis, just to beat people at it McDonalds, BK, Wendys or Burgerfuel? McDonalds only for Deluxe Cheeseburgers

Janine Wilson Manukau campus Bachelor in Health Science When was the last time you went for a run? About a month ago If you had $10 left to last you until the end of the week, what would you spend it on? Probably 2 minute noodles, spaghetti and milk for coffee. What are your thoughts on the government not supporting a GST cut for healthy foods? I don’t like it but I can understand how it would be hard to moderate If you could be number one at any sport in the world, what would it be and why? Snowboarding! Because if I could get over the fear of it I think I would enjoy it! McDonalds, BK, Wendys or Burgerfuel? BK

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Natalie Hampshire City campus Bachelor in Communications When was the last time you went for a run? Surprisingly recently - last Friday! If you had $10 left to last you until the end of the week, what would you spend it on? Bottle of scrumpy ha ha What are your thoughts on the government not supporting a GST cut for healthy foods? Currently none. I suck at keeping up with the news. But now that I’ve read that, it seems like they should support it If you could be number one at any sport in the world, what would it be and why? Hotdog eating. Never turn down a chance for free food McDonalds, BK, Wendys or Burgerfuel? It really depends on my mood. Right now I would love some burger fuel because dinner is taking ages.

Hannah Baylis City campus BA in International Hospitality Management When was the last time you went for a run? A few months ago – last holidays. If you had $10 left to last you until the end of the week, what would you spend it on? Creamy hot chocolates What are your thoughts on the government not supporting a GST cut for healthy foods? I am a bit disappointed because we should be encouraging everyone to eat healthier and having GST cuts on healthy foods means it gives everyone more motivation and drive to buy the now “cheaper” items which would in fact be healthy. If you could be number one at any sport in the world, what would it be and why? Ten Pin Bowling... is that a sport? Because it’s fun and very sociable and I’m reasonably good at it. McDonalds, BK, Wendys or Burgerfuel? It’s a toss between Wendys and Burgerfuel but I’m going to say Burgerfuel!


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