Issue 2 • 2013
ONECHILD ONEHOUR ONECHURCH ONESCHOOL
“Gratitude is the stone which lines the well of joy; ingratitude is the stone which lines the well of bitterness.” – Wendy Jarrott-Smith
“Gratitude is the heart’s memory.” – French Proverb Welcome to the August 2013 edition of Voices of Hope. Our theme for this edition is “gratitude”. From our first babbled “ta”, and our parents urging us “don’t forget the magic words”, we have been encouraged to say thank you for gifts received and kindness done from the moment we could utter a sound. It is one of our cultural mores and what Aussies consider to be the most basic of manners. But what about “gratitude”? What can we teach our children about that?
action by “giving thanks”, “letting our lives overflow with thanksgiving”, “giving thanks as a sacrifice” and “singing songs with gratitude in our hearts”.
Gratitude is about more than just saying thank you. It is about the attitude which underpins how we might look at the world. The way in which we respond to situations, and people in our lives.
Thankfulness changes our attitudes and rewires our thinking. It helps to lower blood pressure, reduce stress, and to replace stress hormones with happy hormones. Gratitude helps us to name what we have more clearly, and to operate from a sense of abundance rather than a feeling of lack. Gratitude helps us to refocus our thinking, and to keep the main thing, the main thing.
Gratitude directly shapes our view of the world. It can be the attitude with which we clothe ourselves when we step out into the world every day. However gratitude is even more than an attitude. It is a choice; an action; a giving of ourselves. Thankfulness and gratitude are woven through the very fabric of the Biblical text, when it calls for us to take
What are the benefits of gratitude? Scripture tells us in Proverbs 17:22 “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones.” Neuroscience is uncovering similar benefits in its study of how the state of gratitude affects our brains and our bodies.
As you read though this edition of Voices of Hope, may you find much to be personally grateful for, and may you also find some ideas to help your mentored child to build a habit of gratitude and thankfulness.
KIDS HOPE AUS. News
Meet our newest team member: Tim Smith! Please join us in welcoming Tim Smith to the KIDS HOPE AUS. team. Tim joins as Program Development Associate for Victoria, Tasmania, South Australia and Western Australia. He brings with him a wealth of professional experience from his previous working careers in Sales and Marketing, Operations and Depot Management, Courier Driving, as well as years of Church leadership experience in various ministries.
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more ... it can turn a meal into a feast; a house into a home; a stranger into a friend.” – Melodie Beatty
It is Tim’s experience with churches, pastors and leaders through a range of denominations and organisations that he will draw on in his new role, and looks forward to meeting many of you at our National Conference and other training events over the next few months. Tim has been married to Paula for 22 years and have four beautiful children together. Rebecca, 21, Stephanie 19, Thomas 14, and a surprise little blessing last year Jacob, 1. He loves being a husband and father and is passionate about the role of men in the home, the Church, the workplace and the community. One of Tim’s main inspirations to join KIDS HOPE AUS. was his drive to see more men become mentors, particularly for boys in our schools who are lacking male role models. Tim loves any sport but particularly golf, cricket and Aussie Rules – he is a major fan! Tim is also a musician, playing the piano and saxophone and singing at Church. Tim has already hit the ground running and is loving being involved in the life changing focus of KIDS HOPE AUS. and being able to make a difference in the lives of children, their families, their school communities and the lives of the mentors.
To contact the KIDS HOPE AUS. National Office, please phone 03 9287 2606 To speak to the World Vision Church Relationship Manager in your state, please phone:
Look out for our last training dates for 2013 ... Queensland
12 – 13 November
Victoria
19 – 20 November
VIC/TAS 03 9287 2477 NSW/ACT 02 9806 6300 QLD 07 3387 2700 SA/NT 08 8238 4600 WA 08 6454 7800 Email: auso.kids.hope@worldvision.com.au
“Happiness is wanting the things you have.” – Unknown
“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” – Albert Einstein
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The power of gratitude By Dr Stephen Larmar
With commitment, mentors can help search-institute.org the children they mentor to develop an attitude of resilience and gratitude. Photo: Ilana Rose/World Vision
I have always been a naturally grateful person. My living a significantly blessed life has in part influenced this state of being. I also believe that this trait I possess is one that seems to have been God-breathed. I am very grateful that I am a grateful person! Whether people see gratefulness as an innate quality, a socially constructed tendency or a mix between the two, there is no doubt that gratefulness is a positive trait that can be helpful for navigating the challenges of life. A grateful attitude can help us to focus on the positives, resulting in an increased sense of hope. Does research show any link between “gratitude” and a child’s physical, emotional or social wellbeing? A number of scientifically validated studies have been conducted over the years that give weight to the conclusion that gratitude can make a difference in our lives. In his book Thanks! How the Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, Dr Robert Emmons, Professor of Psychology from the University of California, explores how his eight years of research supports the claim that gratitude can improve a person’s emotional and physical health. Dr Emmon’s research also emphasises how a thankful disposition can serve to build stronger connections with others, enhancing relationships and community interaction. Emmon states “... gratitude enriches human life. It elevates, energises, inspires and transforms. People are moved, opened and humbled through expressions of gratitude.”
Wow ... no wonder grateful people feel so happy!
How do we cultivate “an attitude of gratitude” in our own lives and the lives of the children we mentor? Some kids see the glass half empty while others see the glass half full. For those children who do seem to hold a perspective that includes grateful acknowledgement of some of the positive aspects of their lives, encouraging further gratitude doesn’t seem to be a major hurdle. For kids who don’t appear to approach life hopefully or who fail to recognise the good things that life has given them, cultivating hope may represent a more challenging task. A helpful first step for mentors to assist in instilling the kind of hope that leads to gratitude is to model a thankful attitude. Through your weekly conversation you can highlight some of the things that make you feel grateful, emphasising the ways that being grateful have made life better for you. Another important strategy is to help the child you are mentoring to identify positive attributes that they can be thankful for. Encouragement is a powerful tool that can lead to significant change. It may be useful to spend some time in one of your sessions developing a gratefulness inventory that lists some of the aspects of the child’s life that they can be thankful for. Dr Emmon suggests strategies such as keeping a gratitude journal, and using visual reminders such as pictures or symbols to help us to remember those things for which we can be grateful. He says that developing an attitude of gratitude can be challenging - so it is important for mentors to stay focused and committed! With a little bit of help and an unswerving commitment to the mentoring process, mentors can make a difference in helping children to cultivate gratitude in their lives that will hopefully lead to physical, emotional and social gains. 3
Gratitude “Actually, I don’t have a sense of needing anything personally. I’ve learned to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I am, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.” – Philippians 4: 11-13 (The Message)
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Activities for mentors and children Little Attitudes of Gratitudes 1. Mind your manners. Say please, thank you and excuse me. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20.
Smile when you see your family/friends. Turn your frown upside down. Pick up after yourself. Notice when others do kind things for you, show gratitude by action or words. Say “I love you” before going to bed. Give hugs daily. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Focus on what you are happy about today. Create gratitude journals to keep track of daily blessings. Show thankfulness for even the little things others do for you. Leave notes to say “thank you” in unexpected places like lunch boxes and under pillows. Encourage someone with a compliment. Verbalise what you are grateful for when you feel like complaining about life. Keep a basket of small slips of paper on the table. Write notes of thankfulness during the week and read them to each other during a family meal or at mentoring sessions. Remember to thank God for blessings each day. Surprise your family (or friends) with little gifts or treats to show you thought of them. No grumbling about minor annoyances around the house or at school. Do special things to cherish time with your family/friends. You never know what tomorrow will bring. Reflect on happy memories regularly. Make inspiration boards of special times. Help someone out without them having to ask you. Watch for someone in need. When you are doing household/school chores be grateful you have a home/school to clean.
Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery it is. In the boredom and pain of it, no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it, because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.” – Frederick Buechner
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Activities for mentors and children
“For each new morning with its light, for rest and shelter of the night, for health and food, for love and friends, for everything Thy goodness sends ... thank you”. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” – William A. Ward
“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.” – Epictetus
Practise gratitude with your child • Make a “gratitude list”. It might include: people, events, or memories. These can be of happy times, or difficult times which helped you grow. • Write a “gratitude letter”. Think of someone who has meant a lot to you or your mentored child and thank them for all they have done for you. • Start a “gratitude journal” with your mentored child. Write an entry together each week. • Use each letter of the word gratitude to spell out a word or phrase that relates to the concept. Ie. “G” is for good food or grandparents, “R” is for rollerblading and relaxing etc. • Help your child to learn the word for “thank you” in different languages and make a poster of those words. Say “gracias”, “obligato” or “danke” when you’re sharing the mentor hour. • Together with your child pledge to make a “gratitude adjustment” and tweak your responses to difficult situations. • Work with your child to savour moments and be thankful for small things. Practise “sitting” in the present with your child.
Take a gratitude break
“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lit the flame within us.” – Albert Schweitzer
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After a busy day mentoring, take the time to make a cuppa and give thanks for: • Your life • The beauty of wilderness places • Clean drinking water • Someone you can depend on • The joy of building something • New beginnings • The trust of a child • Life’s rhythms and rituals • Visionary leaders who inspire you • The ability to make a difference in this world • Anything else you might be grateful for!
See firsthand the difference you’re making for Cambodian children and their families by visiting World Vision project’s with Global One.
Book reviews For coordinators and mentors One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are, by Ann Voskamp For children: I Grow in Grandad’s Garden, by Brian Andrew. Join Ellie and her granddad on their growing journey through granddad’s garden. Children can relate to what makes them happy, sad, afraid, confident and excited. In I Grow in Grandad’s Garden, Brian writes about deep truths in an understandable and child-friendly way, which resonates with both children and adults. - Dr Steve Stathis, child and adolescent psychiatrist. Find out more at grandadsgarden.com.au
“God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say ‘thank you’”? – William A. Ward
“One of the most gifted writers I have ever read ... a book that will challenge you and mess with you in the most beautiful of ways.” - Lysa Terkeurst, Proverbs 31 Ministries Ann Voskamp’s motto for life and theme for her book, One Thousand Gifts is to “dare to live fully right where you are”. This book takes you on the journey of Ann’s life, which is scattered with loss, lament and brokenness, each of which has its redemption amidst her intentional search for grace, thanksgiving and joy. As a stay-at-home mum and farmer’s wife, who home-schools six kids, she has had many long days of wondering “Where is God in it all?” Ann finds the sacred in the ordinary, by recounting the gifts God has given her in the everyday. Just regular, unexciting and yet, explicit gifts that God presents to us with every breath.
Visit our overseas projects to connect with World Vision’s work! World Vision’s Global One would like to offer KIDS HOPE AUS. Coordinators, mentors and prayer partners the opportunity to travel overseas for the trip of a life time. Global One provides the chance to learn firsthand the issues facing people living in economic poverty and is about creating life changing connections that will reshape your view as a global citizen. We are currently looking for expressions of interest from passionate KIDS HOPE AUS. volunteers to join a mid-2014 week-long trip to visit World Vision’s projects in Cambodia. If you’re interested, please visit the Global One website for more information: worldvision.com.au/takeaction/ globalone.aspx or email Lisa Jenkins at globalone@worldvision.com.au.
And so she begins her list, literally writing each one down, counting them as she goes; “Gifts He bestows. This writing it down – it is sort of like ... unwrapping love”. Ann’s style of writing is unique and poetic. Her invitation to enter into this space of gratitude will possibly challenge you, but as you embrace this habit of counting your blessings, you cannot help but be transformed. Read more at onethousandgifts.com 7
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” says Kepanda from Malawi
World Vision Australia staff Greg Bradley met farmer Kepanda in Malawi. Photos: Greg Bradley/World Vision
Not long ago, life for Kepanda and his farming family in Malawi was tough. Years of drought meant his crops failed season after season. Even when his crops didn’t fail, the harvests were very small and not enough to feed his family, let alone make a profit. Kepanda’s family – which included his wife, children and grandchildren - could only eat every one to two days. He despaired that his grandchildren were malnourished and always hungry. Year after year of failed crops meant life was tough for Kepanda and his family. This rundown hut was all he could afford to house his nine children and grandchildren.
Desperate for change and to be able to provide a better future for his family, Kepanda found hope when he joined a World Vision-supported agricultural project in his area. Through the project he was assigned a mentor, given agricultural training, certified seeds and tolls. His first harvest after this assistance was four times larger than any harvest previously. Within two years, Kepanda and his family’s lives improved greatly. The seeds Kepanda first received through the project has meant he has gone on to plant seasons of abundant crops. He now not only can provide his family with three nutritious meals a day, but also has leftover to sell at local markets.
Thanks to World Vision-supported agricultural training he has been able to improve his income to build a new home for his family and send his grandchildren to school. © 2013 World Vision Australia. World Vision Australia ABN 28 004 778 081 is a Christian relief, development and advocacy organisation dedicated to working with children, families and communities to overcome poverty and injustice. Ref # 7206
With this improved income, Kepanda has been able to build a new house, so his family can all live under the one roof. He can also afford to send his grandchildren to school, his biggest dream. While Kepanda and his family have suffered much adversity in their lives, he does not take the blessings he has received for granted. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He cries when first meeting World Vision Australia staff Greg Bradley, on his visit projects in Kepanda’s community. “I am so grateful for all World Vision has done!”