Vol. 19: #25 • Love and Marriage • (6-18-2023) Tidbits of Coachella Valley

by Kathy Wolfe

June is traditionally the most popular month to marry, with approximately 11 percent of couples choosing this month for their wedding. This week, Tidbits lifts the veil and searches the reasons why this is so, and also takes a curious look at some of the facts about love and marriage.

• The month of June was named for the Roman goddess Juno. Juno was associated with all facets of the lives of women, but especially marriage and childbearing. The ancient Romans believed that couples who married in June would always be blessed with happiness and prosperity.

• In the 1954 song “June Bride” from the musical “Seven Brides for Seven Brothers,” one verse states, “Oh, they say when you marry in June, you’re a bride all your life, and the bridegroom who marries in June gets a sweetheart for a wife!”

(Answers on page 16)

Fact or fiction? How much of the life about Martha Jane Cannary was true? How much was embellished? You be the judge as you read along about the rowdy and adventurous woman better known as Calamity Jane.

• Born in 1852, Martha Cannary (often spelled Canary) hailed from Missouri. When she was 13, the family, which included her parents and five younger siblings, began a five-month long wagon train trip to a new home in Virginia City, Montana. Along the route, Martha became a good shot with a rifle, spending her days hunting with the men. She also gained a reputation of being somewhat of a daredevil astride a horse.

• Martha’s mother succumbed to pneumonia almost immediately upon arrival in Montana. Her father then packed up the family and headed to Utah, where he found work as a farmer. But the following year, he also died, now leaving 14-year-old Martha in charge of her siblings. Within months, she had resettled the family in Piedmont, Wyoming.

• Responsible for a family of six, Martha took on numerous jobs, including dishwasher, cook, waitress, ox team driver, nurse, and dance hall girl, and occasionally, jobs of less-thanreputable indulgence. In 1870, she was awarded a job as a scout with General George Armstrong Custer, which was the beginning of her practice of often wearing masculine clothing.

• After a brief stint as a Pony Express rider, she was ordered to the Black Hills of South Dakota in 1876 to help protect settlers and miners from hostile Natives. On the journey to Deadwood, Martha met gunslinger Wild Bill Hickock, who was traveling in the same wagon train.

his hand, his cards would be known forever as the “dead man’s hand.”

• Calamity Jane married a Texan in 1885, the identity of whom is uncertain, and gave birth to a daughter two years later. Details are sketchy as to whether there was a second daughter.

• Her horse-riding abilities and sharpshooting skills landed her a job with Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show in 1895, and she gained fame traveling the Midwest. However, her frequent drunkenness led to her termination.

• Jane penned an autobiography in 1896, filled with embellished and perhaps completely fabricated stories of her adventures. A fellow Wild West Show performer said that Calamity Jane “never saw a lynching and never was in an Indian fight. She was simply a notorious character, dissolute and devilish, but possessed a generous streak which made her popular.” She did indeed have a reputation of being kind and charitable, including nursing many back to health during a smallpox plague in Deadwood.

• Seven years after her publication, Jane’s final job was doing the laundry in a South Dakota house of ill repute. Dead broke and ravaged by alcoholism, the hard-drinking, tobacco-spitting, cussing Calamity Jane died in a shabby hotel room near Deadwood. Her last request was honored

to be buried next to gunfighter Wild Bill Hickock in the Deadwood Cemetery. □

1. TELEVISION: When did “Sesame Street” debut on PBS?

2. MOVIES: What is the name of the moon where “Avatar” takes place?

3. GEOGRAPHY: Which country is home to a tall rock structure called the Finger of God?

4. HISTORY: What was Babe Ruth’s real first name?

5. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: How many of Snow White’s seven dwarfs have names ending in “y”?

6. MUSIC: Which country did the band AC/DC come from?

7. LITERATURE: How many books are in the primary Harry Potter novel series?

8. GOVERNMENT: How many national parks are in the United States?

9. FOOD & DRINK: In which country was the Caesar salad invented?

10. ANATOMY: Where is the uvula in the human body?

Answers

• Both Jane and Hickock were heavy drinkers and confirmed exaggerators, and struck up a friendship. But the friendship was short-lived as Hickock was shot in the head by Jack McCall in August of that year, as he sat at a gambling table. With a pair of eights and a pair of aces in

1. 1969.

2. Pandora.

3. Brazil.

Love and Marriage (from page one)

free from work. But the Puritans of the 1600s turned away from this, considering it improper to be celebratory on the Sabbath. Also in those early days, only an unmarried woman could be the maid of honor, and only the groom’s brother, best friend, or father could serve as best man.

• The never-ending circle of a wedding ring is a symbol of eternity since it has no beginning or end. Diamond engagement rings date their origins back to the 15th century when Archduke Maximilian of Austria gifted a diamond to his fiancé Mary of Burgundy in 1477, and the tradition of presenting the brilliant and sparkling gem became tradition. Rings are worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because of an old belief that the vein in that finger leads directly to the heart.

• You’ve heard the rhyme “Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.” What is the symbolism behind these four items? Something old signifies continuity and stability, while something new represents optimism and good fortune in the couple’s new life together. Something borrowed is a symbol of borrowed happiness from someone who loves you. Wearing a touch of blue is said to bring a bride good fortune as well as symbolizing love and fidelity.

• The trend of brides wearing a white dress was started by Queen Victoria in 1840 when she wore a white wedding dress to wed Prince Albert. Prior to that, brides just wore their best dress. How about veils? The ancient Greeks and Romans began this tradition because they believed the veil protected the bride from evil spirits. Speaking of evil spirits, the groom carries his bride across the threshold to gallantly protect her from those spirits prowling below.

• Wedding guests have been tossing rice at the newlyweds for centuries. This practice is a symbol of a wish for fertility and prosperity

for the happy couple. The ancient Romans used wheat, while the tradition in eastern India is a rain of flower petals. The Polish use rice but add coins to the ground at the couple’s feet. Environmentally-friendly alternatives include bird seed, dried flowers, or herbs.

• At many Italian weddings, the bride and groom each break a glass. According to legend, the number of shards of glass is equal to the number of happy years the couple will have.

• In ancient times, a dowry was paid to the parents of the bride, usually animals, land, and cash, with the first recorded dowry exchanged in 3,000 B.C. For centuries, wedding gifts from guests wasn’t a common tradition. But in 1924, Macy’s Department Store came up with the idea of a gift registry. Couples picked china patterns, silverware, crystal, linens, and household appliances, registering to inform friends and family of their preferences. Other department stores were quick to pick up this lucrative practice, and wedding gifts very soon became the norm.

month, but eight to ten percent will marry.

• What about online dating? According to recent statistics, one in five relationships begin online and one in six marriages the same way. Those who meet online get married sooner, most likely because a lot of information other couples collect about each other during courtship has already been gathered from the online profile

BITS

1. Typically, what color is the bride's dress in China?

2. How long does the "honeymoon phase" of a marriage usually last?

NUGGETS OF KNOWLEDGE

In 1962, there were about 40.2 million married couples in the U.S. In 2019, that number was close to 62 million. About 780,000 divorces were finalized in the U.S. in 2018. Most divorced people wait about four years before they remarry.

• In the U.S., the average age of a bride is about 25, while the average for men is about 28 years old. One-third of annual marriages take place between couples with one person having been married previously. Although outdoor weddings and destination weddings are on the rise, about 80% of weddings take place in a church or synagogue. The average number of wedding guests is about 180.

COURTSHIP

• How do people meet a prospective partner? According to surveys, close to 70% of relationships start from long-term friendships. About seven percent meet through their family, while 11 percent meet their marriage partners at church. About 40 percent meet through friends, and 15 percent meet at work. Nine percent meet through events related to their personal interests, such as going to the gym. Just two percent of men form a relationship with someone they meet at a bar, while that statistic is at nine percent for women. For those who meet at parties, 17 to 25 percent will result in a short-term relationship lasting less than a

1.VERNALEQUINOX

2.CROCUS

By Lucie Winborne

* Amazon founder Jeff Bezos originally wanted to name the company Cadabra, but thought better of it after people kept mishearing the moniker as “cadaver.”

* The unenviable record for longest sneezing fit belongs to U.K. resident Donna Griffiths, who began “kerchooing” Jan. 13, 1981 and by July 26 broke the previous record of 194 days. Griffiths sneezed an estimated million times in the first 365 days and finally stopped on Sept. 16, 1983, after 977 days. The exact reason behind her ordeal is still not fully clear.

* Scientists believe Earth’s core, made up primarily of iron and nickel, may be even hotter than the surface of the sun, with temperatures reaching up to 9,932 degrees F.

* A Japanese company awards employees who don’t indulge in the habit of smoking when at work an extra six days of paid leave per year. The incentive was launched after it was calculated that workers who took smoke breaks had more than 15 minutes of extra time away from their desks each day.

* Platypuses may be cute, but are also so odd-looking that when scientists first discovered them, they thought the animal was a hoax.

* People are 30 times more likely to laugh at something if they’re with someone else.

* In the early 20th century, radium was commonly mixed with water, sold as an over-the-counter “energy” drink under the brand name Radithor, and marketed with the slogan “A Cure for the Living Dead,” until the federal government stopped its production and sale in 1932.

* Ancient Roman soldiers sometimes wore breastplates encrusted with diamonds in the belief that the gems offered them extra protection.

Thought for the Day: “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.”

-- Lily Tomlin

(c) 2023 King Features Synd., Inc.

Everyday CHEAPSKATE®

by Mary Hunt

Dear Cheapskate: I’ve Got a Question on Withholding, People-Pleasers, Cosigning

Everyday CHEAPSKATE®

Dear Cheapskate: My husband has cosigned a couple of loans for family members, and his brother just asked him to co-sign for something else. I really love his generous nature, but I’m worried it might end up hurting us in the end, especially since we are looking to move soon and will need to take out a loan of our own. Could his helpful ways hold us back? -- Worried Wendy

Dear Wendy: When he (you and he, really) cosign a loan, you are representing to the lender that you will step up and make the payments if the borrower does not. The loan’s payment history becomes part of your credit history and shows up on your credit report as your debt.

As faithful readers know, my inbox fills up quickly. While it’s impossible to respond personally to each of your letters and messages, I often choose questions to answer here, which I believe will be of interest to a large number of readers.

by Mary Hunt

Dear Cheapskate: I just went back to work after being a stay-at-home mom for five years. And since my husband and I both earn about the same in salary, I’m unsure who should claim our son as an exemption on our W-4 forms. Should we both claim him or just one of us, and how will that affect our taxes next year? -- Puzzled in Peoria

Dear Puzzled: Because I don’t have specific details on your situation, I suggest that you leave your husband’s W-4 as it is and you claim “0” exemptions on your W-4 just to be on the safe side. The fewer exemptions you claim, the more money is withheld from your paycheck.

That’s good because you want to make sure sufficient taxes are withheld so you don’t owe money. If it turns out you get a refund on your first tax return as a two-income family, you can increase your number of exemptions.

There are two reasons a person needs a co-signer: That person 1) doesn’t have any credit history or 2) has bad credit history. You take a huge leap of faith when you co-sign a loan. You are taking a risk that the bank or finance company is unwilling to take.

Your husband does his family members no favors by enabling them to get over their heads in debt. Your fears are well founded because if you need to refinance or get a loan in the future, your husband’s credit report will show all of those co-signed loans as his own.

If there are any late payments or the outstanding balances make him appear to be overextended, that will reduce his credit score significantly to the point you cannot get the best rates or even qualify for favorable insurance rates or auto financing.

That’s a long answer to your question. The short answer? Yes! Unfortunately, he can’t get his name off the loans. He’s on the hook until they are paid in full. But he can resolve to never co-sign in the future. *

ADVERTISING PROOF

Final Changes DUE:

If you end up having to pay, you will want to decrease your husband’s exemptions so more money is withheld. The IRS website (irs.gov) has a worksheet and withholding calculator (“Tax Withholding Estimator”) to determine how many exemptions you should claim between the two of you. You can change the number of exemptions on your W-4 at any time.

Dear Cheapskate: My mother is a widow living on a tight budget. The past few Christmases, she’s been blowing a lot of money on gifts for my husband, me and the kids. Then by spring, she’ll usually ask me for a little help to cover her bills. I know she feels Christmas is the one time she can really spoil us, but I'm worried she may be digging herself into a money pit. What can I do?

-- Concerned Daughter

Dear Concerned Daughter: I think your mom and I have something in common. We are people-pleasers. It’s easy for us to go overboard trying to get approval. Given that, here are a couple of ideas.

Take her out to lunch and tell her you understand that things are tight since your dad is gone and it makes you uncomfortable when she spends a lot on you. Gently turn the conversation to the coming holidays. Ask her to help you teach the kids that sometimes the best gifts aren’t wrapped up in a box. Years from now they won’t remember the gifts she gave as much as the time she spent with them. One idea might be for her to give them individual gift certificates for “My Special Day with Grandma,” a day doing just what they love to do.

As for you and your husband, if she has a possession that you love dearly, suggest she give that to you for Christmas. She’ll have many years of watching you enjoy owning something that is also precious to her.

Mary invites you to visit her at EverydayCheapskate.com, where this column is archived complete with links and resources for all recommended products and services. Mary invites questions and comments at https://www.everydaycheapskate. com/contact/, “Ask Mary.” This column will answer questions of general interest, but letters cannot be answered individually. Mary Hunt is the founder of EverydayCheapskate.com, a frugal living blog, and the author of the book “Debt-Proof Living.”

COPYRIGHT 2023 CREATORS.COM

If you have a credit card, you’re part of the 84 percent of Americans who own at least one card. Here’s your opportunity to learn more about this modern method of transacting your cash.

• Before there were actual credit cards, in the early 1900s, major department stores such as Macy’s and Marshall Field offered a type of credit to their best customers. This was in the form of paper or brass tokens which customers would present to the clerk, leave with their purchases, and pay for by the end of the month. By 1929, credit sales amounted to 50 percent of total sales in the stores that offered this convenience.

• In late 1949, businessman Frank McNamara was entertaining clients at a New York City restaurant when he realized he didn’t have his wallet. After being bailed out by his wife, McNamara determined that he would never again be caught without a means of payment. A few short months later, he and his attorney had established the Diners Club Card, a cardboard card that could be used in New York restaurants.

• At first, it was accepted by only 28 restaurants and two hotels, but it was soon expanded to include numerous hotels, car rentals, and flower shops. By the end of the year, Diners Club had 20,000 members, each paying an annual membership of $5.00. The following year, there were 42,000 cardholders. It was a requirement that the balance be paid in full each month.

• In 1951, New York’s Franklin National Bank got in the game with a multi-purpose card. When they realized that they couldn’t make money by merely charging fees to merchants for each card purchase, Franklin allowed customers to carry debt over with a tacked-on interest charge.

• Bank of America launched its BankAmericard in 1958 by sending out mass mailings of cards to anyone who did business with them in California, about two million cards.

• In 1966, BankAmericard went national as the country’s first licensed general-purpose credit

card. Ten years later, the card was given a new name -- Visa.

• We might refer to using a credit card today as “paying by plastic,” but the original cards were all cardboard. It wasn't until 1959 that American Express changed that by issuing the first card made of more durable plastic.

• Master Charge was introduced in 1966 by a group of banks. More and more banks began issuing credit cards during the 1960s, using the mass mailing approach by sending cards to millions of prospective customers. Finally, in 1970, legislation was passed in the form of the Unsolicited Credit Card Act, which prohibited banks from sending active cards to anyone who hadn’t requested one.

• The Discover card was launched in 1985 Sears, at the time the largest retailer in the U.S. They offered the innovative concepts no annual fee, higher-than-normal credit, and a cash-back bonus, in which a percentage of total purchases was refunded back to the cardholder. It was an immediate success.

• IBM engineer Forrest Parry revolutionized the function of credit cards when he invented the magnetic strip card in 1960.

• In the mid-1990s, the three credit card giants, Visa, MasterCard, and Europay, jointly introduced the first chip-based card. Designed to improve payment security beyond the magnetic strip cards, small microchips were embedded in the card to gather and store data between merchants, customers, and banks. With each purchase, the chip generates an encrypted code unique to the transaction

• In 1970, just 16% of American families held a bank credit card, but by 1998, that figure had risen to more than 65 percent.

are more than one billion active credit cards in the U.S., with an average debt balance of about $6,270. During the final quarter of 2022, total credit card debt in America had reached a record $930.6 billion. □

by Dana Jackson

Q: What is next for the great Jeremy Strong now that “Succession” is over? -- C.L.

A: Before landing his Emmy-winning role of Kendall Strong on the recently concluded HBO series “Succession,” actor Jeremy Strong had several film credits under his belt. It wouldn’t be surprising if he was aiming for an Oscar next. But before that, he’s headed to Broadway, so perhaps a Tony will be awarded first. In an adaption of Henrik Ibsen’s 1882 play “An Enemy of the People,” he’ll play a whistleblower.

Strong, who grew up admiring the work of Al Pacino and Dustin Hoffman, is no stranger to the stage. He’s studied at Yale and the Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts in London. In 2008, he appeared on Broadway alongside Frank Langella in “A Man for All Seasons.” Look for “An Enemy of the People” to open in early 2024. ***

Q: Is “The Winchesters” returning for a second season? I heard a rumor it was canceled, but that the network changed its mind. -- L.E.

A: Surprisingly, “The Winchesters,” a prequel series to the wildly successful series”Supernatural,” didn’t wow audiences like its predecessor. The CW network canceled it and

other promising shows because of a retooling of its business plan; shows like “Kung Fu,” a reboot of the 1970s series of the same name, and “Walker Independence” have also been given the axe.

Meanwhile, “Walker,” which stars Jared Padalecki, who previously co-headlined the abovementioned “Supernatural,” will be back on the CW for its fourth season.

According to an article in The Hollywood Reporter, ever since CW was bought by Nexstar, it’s earned the unflattering nicknames “Castoffs Wanted” and “Curated Wreckage.” Most of its content will soon consist of shows that originally aired in other countries, such as the Canadian series “The Spencer Sisters,” with Lea Thompson (“Caroline in the City”), and “Sullivan’s Crossing,” with Chad Michael Murray (“One Tree Hill”). Other programming this fall includes unscripted shows that previously streamed elsewhere, like Netflix’s “Down to Earth With Zac Efron.”

Perhaps “The Winchesters” will be saved by another network or streamer once the WGA Writers Strike is resolved, but for now, consider the show a one-and-done. ***

Q: Whatever happened to “The Partridge Family” actor Danny Bonaduce? He was

everywhere in the early 2000s, but I haven’t heard anything about him lately. -- K.E.

A: The 63-year-old former child star has been busy co-hosting a morning radio show in Seattle for the past 11 years. However, he recently had to take a leave of absence to undergo brain surgery.

According to Entertainment Weekly, Bonaduce has had a mysterious neurological issue for more than a year, saying a doctor finally diagnosed him with hydrocephalus, which is when fluid builds up in the brain. Bonaduce admits he’s done “so many stupid things on reality TV,” including celebrity boxing, that could have contributed to his brain injury; however, he can’t pinpoint the exact cause.

* * *

Send me your questions at NewCelebrityExtra@gmail.com, or write me at KFWS, 628 Virginia Drive, Orlando, FL 32803.

(c) 2023 King Features Synd., Inc.

Final Changes

1. Spider-Man: Across the SpiderVerse (PG) Shameik Moore, Hailee Steinfeld

1. Split ................................ (PG-13) James McAvoy, Anya Taylor-Joy

2. Rings (PG-13) Matilda Anna Ingrid Lutz, Alex Roe

2. The Little Mermaid (PG) Halle Bailey, Jonah Hauer-King

3. A Dog’s Purpose (PG) Josh Gad, Dennis Quaid

3. The Boogeyman (PG-13) Sophie Thatcher, Chris Messina

4. Hidden Figures ....................(PG) Taraji P. Henson, Octavia Spencer

5. La La Land (PG-13) Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone

4. Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3 (PG-13) Chris Pratt, Chukwudi Iwuji

5. Fast X (PG-13) Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez

6. Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (R) Milla Jovovich, Iain Glen

6. The Super Mario Bros. Movie (PG) Chris Pratt, Anya Taylor-Joy

7. Sing .......................................(PG) animated

8. Lion ................................ (PG-13) Dev Patel, Nicole Kidman

7. About My Father (PG-13) Robert De Niro, Sebastian Maniscalco

8. The Machine (R) Bert Kreischer, Mark Hamill

9. The Space Between Us (PG-13) Gary Oldman, Asa Butterfield

9. You Hurt My Feelings (R) Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tobias Menzies

10. xXx: Return of Xander Cage .................................... (PG-13) Vin Diesel, Donnie Yen

10. Kandahar (R) Gerard Butler, Navid Negahban

© 2017 King Features Synd., Inc.

© 2023 King Features Synd., Inc.

"Falling

Jeremy Strong (“Succession”)

Good Recipes from Bourbon-Marinated Flank Steak

A sweetly spiced marinade adds flavor and tenderness to classic grilled flank steak.

1/2 cup packed brown sugar

1/2 cup bourbon whiskey

1/3 cup soy sauce

2 tablespoons lemon juice

1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce

1 teaspoon coarsely ground black pepper

1/4 teaspoon hot pepper sauce 2 flank steaks (about 1 1/2 pounds each), well trimmed*

1. Prepare marinade: In jumbo self-sealing plastic bag (2 gallons), mix 1 cup water with all ingredients except steaks.

2. Add steaks, turning to coat. Seal bag, pressing out excess air. Place bag in shallow glass baking dish and refrigerate at least 4 hours or overnight, turning bag occasionally.

3. Remove steaks from marinade. Discard marinade, keeping a small amount to drizzle over steaks on serving platter. Place steaks on grill over medium heat and cook 15 to 20 minutes for medium-rare or until of desired doneness, turning once. (Or, preheat broiler and place steaks on rack in broiling pan. Broil steaks at closest position to source of heat 15 to 20 minutes for medium-rare.)

4. Transfer steaks to warm, large platter, let stand 10 minutes for easier slicing. To serve, cut into thin slices and array on serving platter with drizzled marinade over presentation. Serves 12.

* Or, use 2 beef top-round steaks, about 1 1/2 inches thick (about 1 1/2 pounds each). Follow recipe for flank steaks, but grill or broil 25 to 30 minutes for medium-rare or until of desired doneness.

 Each serving: About 215 calories, 27g protein, 4g carbohydrates, 9g total fat (4g saturated), 47mg cholesterol, 235mg sodium, 0g fiber.

Apricot-Pistachio Salad

The mix of pistachio, apricot and snow peas give salad a delightful new spin.

1/3 cup extra-virgin olive oil

1 lemon

2 tablespoons white balsamic vinegar

Salt Pepper

8 ounces stringless sugar snap peas

2 heads butter lettuce

1/2 cup packed fresh flat-leaf parsley leaves

1/4 cup packed fresh mint leaves

1 tablespoon snipped chives

1 tablespoon chopped fresh dill leaves

1/4 cup thinly sliced dried apricots (preferably California)

1 cup roasted, salted, shelled pistachios

1. Pour oil into jar with tight-fitting lid. From lemon, finely grate all peel and squeeze 2 tablespoons juice; add to jar, along with vinegar, 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/8 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper. Cover; shake well. Let stand up to 2 hours or refrigerate up to 3 days. Bring to room temperature before serving.

2. Fill large bowl with ice and water. Heat 4-quart saucepan of water to boiling on high. Add snap peas; cook 2 minutes or just until bright green. Drain and immediately transfer to ice water. When cool, drain again. Peas can be covered and refrigerated overnight.

3. On serving platter, with hands, gently

toss lettuce, herbs, apricots, pistachios and snap peas. Shake dressing and drizzle over salad or serve alongside. Serves 12.

For thousands of triple-tested recipes, visit our Web site at www.goodhousekeeping.com/recipefinder/.

(c) 2019 Hearst Communications, Inc.

GOOD NEWS FOR BUSINESS OWNERS!

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If you miss out on this rare opportunity you will have only yourself to blame.

TIDBITS

John Allen

Donald

NEXT WEEK in TIDBITS PAGES THROUGH HISTORY TO LEARN ABOUT

Books

Cody’s

Corner

Dog Talk with Uncle Matty

By Matthew Margolis Creators News Service

If It Looks Like a Dog...

Perhaps you’ve heard the expression: If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.

That’s writer Douglas Adams’ version, anyway. The point is, things usually are what they seem. The key is to treat them as such.

This cuts to the core of our relationships with our dogs. Understanding that your dog is a dog is the solid slab of concrete on which the rest of your relationship is built. Understanding what it means that your dog is a dog is our first priority as responsible dog owners.

The vast majority of the people who call me for help with their dog problems are actually, themselves, the real problem.

They refer to their dogs as their baby, their sweetheart, their cutie pie -- terms usually reserved for a romantic partner. And yes, women are more likely than men to anthropomorphize their dogs.

Dog commands from these people sound a little something like: “Don’t do that.” “Don’t sniff there.” “Don’t you run away from me.” And none of those is decipherable to a dog.

This type of dog owner calls me because they’re convinced their dog is angry that they have to go to work in the morning, or he’s upset about their upcoming move to a new city, or he’s jealous because she’s started seeing someone new. Would you ask a horse whether he was content with his new stall? Why is it any different with a dog?

When most people bring a dog home, he becomes a full-fledged member of the family.

He’s lovingly welcomed into the nest, where he remains for about 15 years. As it should be. But he’s still a dog.

A woman called me recently to discuss her dog, who sleeps in her bed. “Why does he growl when I move around?” she asked. Because he thinks it’s his bed. He’s no longer being treated as a dog, he’s now confused, and here comes the trouble.

If you treat your dog like a dog, love your dog like a dog and train your dog to be the best dog he can be, you won’t confuse him -- or yourself. If you’re going to bring a dog into your home, into your life, you need to understand canine behavior. You need to educate yourself first, and

Cody's Corner: Turn to Page 11

3. The Weekly “Brain Breaker”

Narrative"

SECURITY

by Tom Margenau

My ‘Ivory Tower’ Is in the Basement of a Suburban Split-Level

I got an interesting email (actually, it was more like a rant) from a guy who was upset about an encounter he had with the Social Security Administration. It went on for a couple pages. I’m used to rants. After all, you just can’t please everyone all the time. But here is the part of his missive that intrigued me. He said, “How does it feel sitting there in your ivory tower with all the trappings of power serving as a mouthpiece for the Biden administration? Why should I believe anything you say? After all, you’re paid to mislead people about the workings of the corrupt Social Security system!”

I normally wouldn’t bore readers of this column with the wild accusations of a crazy person. But I bring it up only because more than a few readers think I work for the Social Security Administration and that I am some kind of spokesperson for the agency. I am not. And I certainly am not a “mouthpiece for the Biden administration.”

The person who sent me this email, along with more than a few other readers, believe that I have an office in an ivory tower somewhere in Washington, D.C.; that I get my daily marching orders either directly from the president or certainly from the head of the Social Security Administration; and that I’m paid handsomely to mislead people into falling for the failed policies of a doomed social program.

Let me paint a more realistic picture for you. I’m a frumpy, old, retired government employee, eking out an existence on a modest civil service pension, living with my wife of almost 50 years in a split-level home in Colorado. My “ivory tower” office is a desk in our basement. The “trappings of power” that surround me include grandkids’ toys and a 35-year-old couch permanently sticky and stained by the spills of both my kids and now my grandkids.

It is true that I once was a spokesperson for the Social Security Administration. I worked for

the SSA for 32 years, and for part of that time, I served as the agency’s deputy press officer. But I retired about 18 years ago.

I started writing this column 26 years ago while I still worked for the SSA in San Diego. I no longer was in the agency’s press office when I wrote the column and I never had to get official clearance for any column I wrote while I still worked for the government. Despite that fact, I guess you could say that while I was still working for the SSA, this column was a quasi-official mouthpiece for the organization. At least I certainly dared not write anything that was against agency policy or that would upset my bosses!

But that all changed the day I retired in 2005. From that point on, I was no longer a spokesperson (some might argue an “apologist’) for the Social Security system or the agency that runs the program. Instead, I was just a retired old goat who knew a lot about the inner workings of Social Security and who was eager to share his knowledge with the readers of this column.

And I can tell you that I breathed a huge sigh of relief on the day I retired. Not only because I wouldn’t have to fight Southern California’s nightmarish traffic to get to work each day (that’s part of the reason I eventually moved to Colorado), but because I was now free to “tell it like it is” -- to explain Social Security rules without having to worry about any “spin” that the SSA’s political leaders might want to put on the program. And because I would be able to freely criticize the agency or its employees when I thought they were doing something wrong.

I’ve done both many times over the past 18 years. Yet some people still want to believe that I am some kind of paid “flack” for the government. As an example, let me explain what led to the diatribe that began this column.

The irate guy wrote to ask me some questions about filing for Supplemental Security Income disability benefits. (To remind some of my readers, SSI is a federal welfare program that SSA runs for

the government. It is NOT a Social Security benefit. It’s an entirely separate program.) Anyway, he apparently had gone to his local Social Security office to file for SSI benefits. He was angry because the person he talked to simply told him he wasn’t eligible and sent him on his way.

I wrote back to tell him that my hunch was the SSA representative was right. SSI has very specific and rigid rules about income and asset eligibility requirements. (Those rules vary from state to state, so I can’t just list them here.) If you have even one dollar more than the rules allow, you’re simply not eligible for benefits. That reaffirmation of the SSA rep’s denial of his claim is what set him off. Part of his missive to me made statements like, “I know you guys are paid to turn down as many people as you can for benefits.”

There are two main points this guy failed to understand. One I didn’t make clear in my first answer to the guy. The other I did.

Point one is that the SSA’s employees are NOT paid to deny Social Security or SSI benefits to anyone. They are paid to carry out the rules and laws of both programs. In fact, they have an incentive to take as many claims for benefits as possible. Staffing levels in local Social Security offices are determined, in part, by how many Social Security and SSI claims they process each day. So, generally speaking, the only time they are not going to take a claim for benefits is when the person clearly isn’t eligible for such benefits. In other words, why waste their time and the customer’s time when the outcome (a denied claim) is not in doubt?

Having said that, the second point I made to this guy (the one he missed probably because he was blinded by the rage he then directed at me in his follow-up “ivory tower” email) is a point I make all the time in this column: You have every right to file for any kind of benefit for which you think you are eligible. So, if a Social Security rep says that you aren’t eligible for Social Security or SSI, you can -- and should if you really believe you are due benefits -- insist on filing. That way you will get a formal (and legal) decision, as opposed to simply someone’s opinion.

And now if you’ll excuse me, my wife is asking me to come down out of my ivory tower to take out the garbage!

* * *

1. The book of James is in the a) Old Testament b) New Testament c) Neither

2. From 2 Samuel 18:18, who erected a memorial to himself because he did not have a son? a) Absalom b) Onesimus c) Nathaniel d) Jahoida

3. Where is Satan called "the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience"? a) Galatiains 1:20 b) Ephesians 2:2 c) Titus 4:18 d) Colossians 3:6

4. What widowed prophetess was 84 years old on seeing the young Jesus in the temple? a) Anna b) Hagar c) Abigail d) Saphira

5. Which book foretold of the Messiah being born in Bethlehem? a) Ezra b) Jeremiah c) Micah d) Daniel

6. From Genesis 35:22, how many sons did Jacob have? a) 2 b) 7 c) 9 d) 12

(Answers on page 16)

For comments or more Bible Trivia go to www.TriviaGuy.com

If you have a Social Security question, Tom Margenau has all the answers. To find out more about Tom Margenau and to read past columns and see features from other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators. com.

Sharpen your understanding of scripture with Wilson Casey's latest book, "Test Your Bible Knowledge," now available in stores and online.

SENIOR NEWS LINE

by Matilda Charles

When You’ve Inherited Your Parents’ Belongings

If you’re struggling to deal with all the things you inherited from your parents (and possibly their parents), things you’ve held on to for years, you’re not alone. In fact, as told to me recently by an antiques dealer, there are many, many of us. And we all have the same dilemma: what to do with all that “stuff.”

The answer for some of us is to determine if those items have any real monetary value and then sell them.

Coins and coin collections seem to be at the top of the list of things we unearth in our parents’ possessions. Your first step: Grab a magnifying glass. If the coins are loose, go over them one by one. If the coins are encased in plastic, don’t open the case. Check the date and the details on the coins and go online. You might be surprised at their value (as I recently was to discover that a very tiny gold coin at the bottom of my father’s jewelry box was worth many hundreds of dollars if sold).

Your second step, if you’d like to sell the coins: Find someone you trust. Look for a local, established coin dealer, not an online company or fly-by-night buyer. Make two or three calls and describe a few of the coins you have to gauge their reaction and what price they might offer. If you like what you hear, go see them in person. Take pictures on your phone and show

them what additional coins you have, but don’t take them all in at once.

There are other things you might unearth in your parents’ possessions that can have value as well: watches, clocks, military medals, magazines, cut glass crystal, silverware, original Fiestaware, fountain pens, tools, first day covers, vinyl records, rotary telephones, luggage, first edition books, etc.

Who knows? You might end up with extra cash to pay your next several electric bills or a month of groceries ... or much more.

* * *

Matilda Charles regrets that she cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into her column whenever possible. Send email to columnreply2@ gmail.com.

then your dog, in order to bridge the communication gap.

Living with a dog when you have little to no understanding of canine behavior and when neither of you has been taught to effectively communicate with the other is like traveling in a country where you don’t speak the language: stressful at times and not nearly as fun as it would be otherwise.

But the saddest part of turning your dog into a person is that you inevitably lose sight of the dog. He becomes a surrogate child or a surrogate friend or a surrogate lover instead of the wonderful dog he is.

* * *

Dog trainer Matthew “Uncle Matty” Margolis is the co-author of 18 books about dogs, a behaviorist, a popular radio and television guest, and the host of the PBS series “WOOF! It’s a Dog’s Life!” Read all of Uncle Matty’s columns at www.creators.com, and visit him at www.unclematty.com.

Cody’s Corner (from page 9)

Bout of Pneumonia Leads to Shocking Breast Cancer Diagnosis

DEAR DR. ROACH: My 73-year-old wife has been diligent in getting her mammograms done, plus blood tests and doctor’s visits every three months. In November 2021, she came down with what seemed like a very bad cold that was actually confirmed by X-ray to be pneumonia. After two rounds of different antibiotics, she had lost 35 pounds, and it left her with weakness and a lingering cough. A CT scan later indicated that she “either has cancer or had cancer in the past.”

Multiple tests later, it was determined that there was a tumor at the 12:00 position in her breast and a tumor in her stomach that had spread to her pelvis and bones in her legs. She started taking letrozole and Ibrance, and although extreme fatigue is the most common side effect, they appear to be working.

My question is, how could this initial breast cancer have gone undetected for so long with all of the regular testing and not set off alarms? As bad as the pneumonia was, it allowed her to receive a diagnosis of a disease that eluded detection by current screening methods and very good physicians. Anon.

ANSWER: I am so very sorry to hear about your wife's experience. Breast cancer is not just one disease. We think of breast cancer as something that can be easily cured if it is found early, but if you wait too late, it becomes difficult or impossible to cure.

Some breast cancers do act that way, but others are much more indolent -- they grow slowly and may never get to the point where they threaten a person’s life.

Unfortunately, there are some breast cancers that can become metastatic (spreading to different sites such as the lymph nodes, bones, liver or lungs) before they are detectable at all by even the most sensitive tests, such as a mammogram or MRI. By the time they are found, because of symptoms, they are incurable by surgery and require systemic treatments like chemotherapy and hormonal therapy.

Most metastatic breast cancer is incurable, but newer treatments have improved life expectancy, with the average being three years. Screening for breast cancer is unable to save all lives. More effective treatment, in combination with regular screening, will be necessary to continue to progress against this horrible disease. ***

DEAR DR. ROACH: If a male inherits the BRCA1 gene, what should his medical concerns be? B.D.

ANSWER: Men with the BRCA1 gene (mutations in this gene predispose patients to several types of cancer) are at high risk for male breast cancer and prostate cancer. They should perform a monthly breast self-examination and receive a clinical breast exam every year, start-

ing at age 35.

Screening mammography is not recommended for men with a BRCA1 mutation. Prostate cancer screening should certainly be done, possibly starting at age 40, rather than age 55, for average-risk men. There are some medicines that reduce risk of prostate cancer, but these aren’t generally recommended. A diet high in plants, especially tomatoes, which are high in lycopene, has a suggested, but not definitively proven, reduction in risk of prostate cancer.

There is an increased risk for pancreatic cancer among both men and women with this gene, and one guideline recommends screening for pancreatic cancer in a person with a BRCA mutation who also has a first-degree family member (parent, sibling or child) with pancreatic cancer. Colon cancer screening should begin at age 45, just as it does for the general population.

I recommend a visit with a genetic counselor, especially in a person with a BRCA gene mutation who is considering starting a family.

VETERANS POST  

by Freddie Groves

VA Fraud 101

There are only so many tax dollars to go around to provide services and benefits to veterans. When thieves cut into that money by taking what they’re not entitled to, it harms the rest of us. You can help by keeping your eyes open, and then reporting what you see to the correct people if you spot a scam.

Education benefits fraud can occur when a school charges veterans a higher rate than what is advertised or what they charge civilian students. They might offer discounts to civilians while billing the Department of Veterans Affairs for higher amounts. Students are told they don’t even have to go to class and no actual skills are being taught.

Health care fraud can include a statement report listing services the veteran never received (always check your explanation of benefits and the itemized statement of medical services supposedly provided to you), or they may include the name of a different doctor or even the wrong dates the services were supposedly provided.

Medical identity theft can include the above, but gets worse when you discover errors in your medical file or when collection agencies start to hound you for payment for medical services you never received.

Final

ADVERTISING PROOF

Genetic testing scams can be lucrative for thieves, partially because of the kickbacks involved. Beware especially if you get a request for your personal information -- including medical, personal and financial -- for tests your doctor didn’t order.

Keep an eye on what goes on around you for things such as: The appearance that a deceased veteran’s benefits are being used by others, a veteran has a maxed-out 100% disability rating but doesn’t seem to be getting any care that can justify the charges, or if a beneficiary appears to be far too physically active for the supposed disability level he claims to have.

VOLUNTEER DRIVERS NEEDED

American Veterans (AMVETS) Post 66 in Palm Springs is seeking volunteer drivers. The drivers will drive a 9 passenger van known as the “AMVETS Express” from Cathedral City and Palm Springs to the Loma Linda VA Hospital and then return to the desert.

The driver will work one day per week. The van departs Cathedral City about 6:30 AM and returns to the desert in the afternoon of the same day. The van operates Monday through Friday.

Applicants for the position of driver do not have to be veterans. Applicants are required to study a training manual and pass a complete physical exam. The drivers cannot be over age 70. The drivers are volunteers and are not paid a salary.

What I’ve touched on here is only the tip of the iceberg. To read about even more signs and indicators of fraud and theft, check the VAOIG’s webpage: www.va.gov/oig/fraud/default.asp Scroll through each section and become familiar with the signs of fraud. You could end up saving the VA massive amounts of money, and providing more funds for veterans to use who actually qualify for it.

* * *

Freddy Groves regrets that he cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into his column whenever possible. Send email to columnreply2@gmail.com.

The AMVETS Express has operated since 2004 and it is the only free van transportation from the desert to the VA Hospital. Drivers are not permitted to accept tips from the passengers. The AMVETS Express takes homeless veterans and veterans who are having a mental health crisis to the hospital. We also transport many disabled veterans who cannot drive a car. For many veterans the AMVETS Express is the only way for them to receive their medical care. We transport about 22 veterans per month. Because we only have three drivers right now on some days we cannot operate for lack of a driver. To apply please call AMVETS Post 66 Commander Tom Swann Hernandez at For full details and to apply, please call AMVETS Post 66 Commander Tom Swann Hernandez at

ADVERTISING PROOF

-- by Jim Miller

How to Locate Interesting Volunteer Opportunities in Your Area

DEAR SAVVY SENIOR: Can you recommend some good organizations or websites for locating worthwhile and hopefully interesting volunteer opportunities? I’ve been doing some volunteer work since I retired last year, but most of the work I’ve tried getting myself involved in hasn’t really been very enjoyable or gratifying. I'm hoping to find a more satisfying way to utilize my spare time.

Retired and Ready.

Dear Retired: For many retirees, finding a volunteer opportunity that meets your interests, utilizes your talents and fits your availability can be challenging. To help you find some interesting and satisfying volunteer opportunities, here are some tips and online tools that can help you search:

Getting Started

Volunteering is a great way for retirees to make a positive contribution to their community and stay actively engaged, not to mention it’s good for your health as well. But how can you find the right opportunity for you?

Start by asking yourself some basic questions. For example, what types of worth while causes or activities interest you? What kind of skills and experience can you offer a volunteer organization? How much time are you willing to give? What do you hope to gain from your involvement in this area (for example, meet new people, learn new skills, help those in need, contribute your time and expertise for a particular cause)?

Once you get a general idea of what you’d like to do, there are dozens of volun teer websites that can help you search for different opportunities in any of these areas.

Most sites work like search engines that let you choose an area of interest and type in your ZIP code or city and state. The sites will then give you a list of opportunities that you can check into. Depending on your interest and expertise, here are some top websites to help you get started.

General volunteer sites:

To find a wide variety of volunteer opportunities in your community that serve causes like children, animals, veterans, seniors, education, health, the arts and more check out sites like VolunteerMatch.org, Engage.PointsofLight.org, IdeaList.org and UnitedWay.org

Retired volunteer sites:

If you’re interested in opportunities targeting older adults and retirees, some good options include AARP’s CreateThe

Good.org, along with AmeriCorps Seniors (AmeriCorps.gov/serve/americorpsseniors), which matches retirees with community projects and organizations that need experienced volunteer help.

AmeriCorps Seniors offers three different programs: RSVP, which has a variety of volunteer activities with flexible time commitments; the Senior Companion Program that brings together volunteers with homebound seniors who have difficulty with dayto-day living tasks; and the Foster Grandparent Program that matchers volunteers with kids in the community that have exceptional needs.

Niche volunteer sites:

There are also a number of niche websites to help you look for specific types of volunteer opportunities in your area. For example, to find natural and cultural volunteer opportunities in places like national and state parks, see Volunteer.gov. If you’re interested in emergency preparedness and disaster response volunteer services, try Ready.gov or RedCross.org. If you have a knack for construction or have an interest in learning about interior design, see Habitat.org. Or, if you’re interested in longer-term volunteer opportunities check out AmeriCorps.gov and PeaceCorps.gov/50plus, which offers three-month to two-year programs in the U.S and abroad.

Professional volunteer sites:

If you have expertise in areas like business planning and development, marketing, communications, finance, fundraising, web and graphic design, or writing and editing there are sites like Catchafire.org and TaprootPlus.org that can link you to volunteer opportunities with nonprofit organizations in need. Or you can help entrepreneurs and small business owners through the SCORE.org volunteer mentoring program.

As you can see, there are a multitude of volunteer opportunities available. All that's needed now is to find the right fit for you.

by Anne McCollam

Service

The Good Fairy Brings

Good Luck

Q: This is a photo of a metal figure that belonged to my aunt. It always fascinated me when I was a child, and when my aunt passed away, my uncle gave it to me. He said he knew how much I liked it and thought my aunt would want me to have it. It stands 12 inches tall and is marked “J.M.R. -- 1916.” It is in perfect condition.

I will always treasure it and would never part with it. I plan to pass it down to my daughter. Any information you can provide will be greatly appreciated.

be seen selling in the range of $500 to $800.

Q: This mark is on the bottom of a porcelain pitcher that was given to me by a relative at least 50 years ago. The pitcher is decorated with the image of a young woman and stands about four inches tall. The design is in relief.

I know nothing about how old it is, who made it or its value.

Art Nouveau Lady series was made by Royal Bayreuth in Germany.

A: Your cream pitcher was made by Royal

Bayreuth around 1900. The company has been located in Tettau, Bavaria, Germany, since 1794. Your pitcher is an example of the “Art Nouveau Lady” series that included a plethora of pieces that included pitchers, toothpick holders, dresser sets, candlestick holders, vases, baskets, bowls and humidors. This series was available in both white satin finish and multi-colored finish. Pitchers can be found in three sizes: water, milk and cream.

The value of your cream pitcher would probably be $250 to $400.

Antiques expert and columnist Anne McCollam has recently retired and no longer receives inquiries nor answers reader letters. Due to the popularity of her column, this publication will continue to reprint previous columns of interest to our readers.

To find out more about Anne McCollam and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com

COPYRIGHT 2023 CREATORS.COM

A: Your figure is known as “The Good Fairy” and was made by the Armour Bronze Company in New York in the early 1900s. It was made of gilded spelter (pot metal) and was produced in several sizes.

Jessie McCutcheon Raleigh commissioned sculptor, Josephine Kern, to create the model. Raleigh was a doll maker and was inspired by the idea of creating a figure that represented friendliness, freedom and good luck. The Good Fairy brought so much joy and happiness to people that she quickly became popular and spawned “Good Fairy” clubs globally.

“J.M.R.” are the initials of Jessie McCutcheon Raleigh and “1916” is the copyright date. The Good Fairy was also made into bookends, lamps and trophies. Some were painted white.

Your figure was made around 1916 and can

Puzzle Solutions

The young child's loose incisor made his gums sore. I told him "This tooth shall pass."

The Good Fairy figure was the creation of Jessie McCutcheon Raleigh.

before they actually meet. The majority of those using online dating sites are looking for marriage or a long-term relationship.

• Research also indicates that marriages between those who met online are lasting longer than those who didn’t meet online. Online marriages are less likely to dissolve with the first year of marriage. The site eHarmony claims that their couples’ divorce rate is just 3.86 percent, compared to the national average of nearly 50 percent.

• About one percent of relationships are formed through speed dating, a matchmaking event where groups of single people come together and have quick conversations. The participants are divided into two groups – one group remains seated and the other rotates after each round. A round lasts anywhere between two and ten minutes, with a typical evening consisting of five to ten rounds. When the bell rings, the participants change and sit down in front of someone new. There is a lapse of a few minutes between rounds for people to mark a scorecard, determining an instant attraction or a lack of chemistry, along with personal notations.

FINAL FACTS

• Between 1970 and 1990, the number of licensed marriage counselors in the U.S. increased by 50-fold.

• A research poll’s results assert that 75 percent of married couples say they are happy at least three-quarters of the time, while 15 percent put that figure at half the time. About ten percent say they are unhappy all of the time.

• Long-married couples claim their secret to a blissful union boils down to four Cs: “Communication, Compromise, Cooperation, and Compassion.” □

Changers

Don’t Hit Down

When the majority of amateurs misshit iron shots, they’re often told, “You didn’t hit down on it!” The implication is that the clubhead did not travel on a descending angle of attack whereby the ball is struck first and the ground second.

Many new golfers have the impression that you have to “get under the ball” in order to create a decent shot. This will result in an attempt to hit the ground first or pick the ball off the turf without any ground contact.

or getting under, try the concept of swinging through. Since the objective of an iron strike is to hit the ground past the ball, many golfers need to focus on swinging through the ball, almost as if to let it get in the way.

ground just in front of the ball, low enough that the clubhead has to hit the ground to knock it out. Make the swing pass through the ball and the tee, with hopes to clip the tee and brush the grass.

Divots should be shallow as if the depth of a bacon strip, not a pork chop.

"We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."

-- Sam Keen