December 2010 TIMELESS

Page 1

TIMELESS Published Since April 2003

Vol. 8 No. 12

300 NAIRA

DECEMBER 2010

The Christmas Story - The Origin of Christmas - The Impact of Christmas on Business - Christmas in Modern Times - Christmas Gift Ideas

Personality Kehinde Dacosta-Lawrence

One of Paulina and Jonathan’s twin boys

An interview with the dancer, producer and songwriter

Society Berry Madness

How the Blackberry is redefining relationships www.timelessnewspaper.com timelesscourage.blogspot.com


PYRAMIDS NILE RIVER KARNAK TEMPLES MOUNT SINAI SIWA OASIS NUBIAN MUSEUM OF ASWAN

Presents THE HIDDEN TREASURE

ALEXANDRIA VALLEY OF THE KINGS SHARM EL SHEIKH

TOUR

For more information contact

Egyptian history in the land of the ancient pharaohs

JETHRO TOURS INTERNATIONAL .EVENT MANAGEMENT. TOUR CONSULTING. TRAINING.

Fourth Floor (Pent-house) Valley View plaza, 99 Opebi Road, Beside Sheraton Hotel, Ikeja, Lagos TeL:234(1)7938993,Ext.603,08034982349 Fax:234(1)262-6690 E-mail:contactus@jethrotoursinternational.com website: www.jethrotoursinternational.com

CRECHE

PRE-SCHOOL PRIMARY

10 Olowogbowo Street, Ilupeju School Administrator: 01-7754807 Customer Service: 08088501999, & 0802-AMVILLE (2684553), 08029990363 01-7921280 Email: info@amvilleschool.com Website: www.amvilleschool.com

Beautiful Environment... Wonderful People...

...Adding value through learning

...A place you’ll Love to be

Montessori Distance Learning Course Do you want to study for a Montessori Diploma in Early Childhood Education (ages 2 1/2 – 6 years)?

&

Dorothy’s Consult

You will have the flexibility to study when and where you want to. Our distance learning course combines email tutorial support to guide you through each of the study modules as well as a carefully structured timetable to keep your progress on target. You can begin your studies at any stage, at any time and from anywhere. Call 01-8934834, 01-8113816, 08033117630 Email: dorothysconsult@yahoo.com


From the Editor-in-Chief

The Essence of Christmas (3) We learn also that even after the fall of man, God also in His infinite mercy gave us a second chance.

T

his again is Christmas time. A time to thank God for the benefit and privilege of this wonderful season. Christmas is usually a time of joy, happiness, generosity and the exchange of gifts because it is the time when we remember that the Lord God Almighty gave the greatest gift of all to the world. The Bible says that we love him because He first loved us. Xmas is also a season to love and to show love to your neighbours, friends and family.

(4) God has made it possible for us to achieve what would otherwise have been impossible. He has made it possible for us to be healed. He has made it possible for us to be empowered. He has made it possible for us to be delivered. He has

In celebrating Christmas, a lot of us with the festivities forget that the real influence of Christmas is the deep lessons of the Cross. We are celebrating the Christ of the Cross who Himself is the greatest lesson of all. As you eat, drink and celebrate this Christmas, please love our Lord in return. Remember that without the Cross, there would be no Christ. What you need to focus on are the lessons of Christ hanging on that Cross.

made it possible for us to be who He wants us to be.

May you have a wonderful season that will bring you specific good tidings in Jesus name.

The truth of the matter is that we do not really know precisely when Jesus was born. As a matter of fact, it might not have been at this particular time if we are to follow the times and seasons, but quite frankly, this does not really matter; what is important is that He came into the world to teach us a few things. Christmas therefore tells us that there are many lessons to be learnt from the birth of Jesus. What are these lessons? (1) God in his infinite mercy and wisdom decided to create us. He gave us an opportunity to live with Him forever. This is not something that should be taken for granted. (2) He provided for us. The Bible tells us that even before we were created, all that we needed has been made available for us and even more than enough.

(5) Perhaps the most important lesson of the Cross is that God came down to earth as man to die for our sins and through His death He gave us life. At this season the issue is that without the Cross, there would have been no Christmas. There just would have been no need for a Christmas.

Ituah Ighodalo DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

3


Contents

Society

Style

The Introverted Personality

14 19 Avoiding Alopecia 17 Feet, Finger 20 The and Face that Christmas Chocolate Recipes

speaks

Advert Hotlines 08026861642, 08039410443, 01-4358330 Circulation Hotline 08023851601 TIMELESS NEWSPAPER is published by TIMELESS COURAGE PUBLISHING LTD. Plot 144, No. 10, Gbagada Expressway (Road leading to TREM), Beside ISN House, Anthony, Gbagada/Oworonshoki Expressway, Lagos. 4

TIMELESS

SEPTEMBER 2010

E-mail: timelesscourage@yahoo.co.uk Blog: timelesscourage.blogspot.com Website: www.timelessnewspaper.com Office Telephones 01-8163350, 01-4358330


Business

EDITORIAL EDITOR-IN-CHIEF/CEO

Ituah Ighodalo EDITOR

Ayodeji Jeremiah SENIOR WRITERS

Adeleke Adeyemi Uche Izayah James Akinbiyi Akinsola SENIOR EDITORIAL ASSISTANT

Tola Awoyemi EDITORIAL ASSISTANT

Titilope Oyelade STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER

Matthew Osarenren CORRESPONDENTS

24 27

Why Clients matter more than Anything What is the Colour of your Business

han t e r o

DESIGN & PRODUCTION EDITOR

Agbele Olusola BUSINESS / COMMERCIAL SERVICES DIRECTOR

Victoria Tandoh EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

Nneka Nwobi GENERAL MANAGER, SALES & MARKETING

Joseph Anurukem

S R E

T T LE

Ladi Ogungbemi Godwin Thomas Taiwo Tunkarimu Mayowa Adeniran Tolu Ifekoya Tayo Obe

HEAD, CIRCULATION

Steve Atannoye

rds o w 0

30

tm o m. n e t f i o t f s a gi tter .co.uk. e e l v i n nd i yahoo will rece e s can urage@ onth u o Y ssco every m e l e tim tter e l r A sta

to

MISSION STATEMENT To establish a well Structured, Educative and Informative Newsmagazine based on Sound Moral Values; providing Honest, Unbiased Reportage in Fairness to all.

SEPTEMBER 2010

TIMELESS


Editorial

Preventing Road Accidents: A Role For All

E

very year, the bane of road transport during the “-ember months”, so-called, has been instances of road accidents that rise disproportionately, compared to other quarters of the year.

sourced from its website, the critical agency sets out to act “[pursuant] to its function of educating drivers, motorists and other members of the public on proper use of the highways, [by identifying] some blackspots (accident-prone locations) on various routes along the nation’s highways”.

Statistically, this fallout is from the upswing in road use, from heightened numbers of people setting out pell-mell from various places of primary domicile to “go home for Christmas”; for people from South-eastern Nigeria resident in other parts of the country, this age-long phenomenon is known as Onwa December.

It then “hereby warned [the motoring public] to observe strict caution while plying such locations in order to reduce the spate of avoidable road carnage, and goes on to list a Road Condition Summary (nationwide), describing Route and Nature of Defect, in seventeen long pages, information a larger proportion of the populace remains ignorant of.

Without any upgrade whatsoever in the transport infrastructure, namely roads and holding stations, and the condition of vehicles being put on the road by transporters, both regular and makeshift (pajawiri in Yoruba), the demand for transportation services comes to far outweighs the supply, overwhelming it, often causing it to crash (pun intended). Hence the resultant carnage on our roads, in terms of loss of lives and limbs, and also appurtenances that then go on to constitute further danger to road users. This cyclic scenario seems to have become accepted as normative of the last segment of the calendar year. This most certainly does not have to be the case – if only a few things, mostly fundamental, can be reconsidered and ensured to be in place. Sadly, for some reasons, the once highly regarded Federal Road Safety Commission, FRSC (established in 1988 vide FRSC Act Cap 141 Laws of the Federation of Nigeria LFN, 1990; amended as FRSC (Establishment) Act, 2007), as the lead agency with the statutory responsibility of overseeing Road Traffic Administration and Safety Management matters in Nigeria, has grown to become less and less visible and laidback over time. A case in point: In a Traffic Alert – “Coping with the Hazards of Blackspots on the Nation’s Highways”, 6

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Slogans like the following should be made into a mantra: Overturn the 3 O’s that want to overturn your life: Overloading (no!); Over-speeding (no!);

the roadworthiness of the vehicle and ascertain that the driver isn’t under the influence of alcohol or any other psychotropic substances, like paraga or sekpe, among many others. To ensure the roads are not overburdened, with vehicles and people, which raises the probability of accidents, perhaps more important is the need to instil in people the following sentiment: If you don’t have to travel, don’t. People should be helped to overcome the prevailing cultural mental imperative of physically reconnecting with loved ones at festive seasons. To the rescue, in this present age of IT, are handy gadgets that render available and affordable un-heard-of things like video calls, conference calls, to enrich the experience of keeping in constant touch for all; with Skype, all may even watch everyone ‘eat together’, among other rites and traditions of the season that call for travelling to get together. In another vein, rescue services need to be made a matter of primary importance. If everyday roadusers are encouraged to learn and master first aid and rudimentary medical interventions, many lives could be saved and damage minimised from road accidents. Carcasses of ‘accidented’ vehicles also need to be removed, as soon as possible, from accident scenes, as they constitute hazards that further raise the accident quotient.

Overtaking (caution!) Furthermore, with sustained awareness campaigns at motor-parks there should be a regime of clearance for only vehicles with up-to-date Certificates of Roadworthiness. Also begging for attention and redress is driver education on basics like road signs, conditions of vehicle, maintaining correct gauge on tyres at all times (why not mandate puncture-free tyres only?), brakes, among others. But also passenger education! They can and should caution drivers of vehicles they are travelling in, when they begin to turn reckless; first, they owe it to themselves to inspect

Still outstanding is the matter of the waning significance of the FRSC as an on-your-toe regulatory body, as in years back. Now the roads are all but uncontrolled. This situation has been compounded by roadblock-mounting policemen who are out to extort money and goods from drivers, ending up constituting impediments to the free flow of traffic. We encourage all to drive safely during this festive period, observe all traffic rules, ensure vehicles are road worthy before being put on the road and be your brother’s keeper by calling the attention of road traffic agencies, the FRSC, LASTMA or the police when accidents occur.


DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

7


events

John 3V3 hosts Gloria Starr

J

ohn 3V3 School of Fashion and Etiquette owned by the renowned hat maker Eme Akenzua recently hosted a cocktail reception in honour of famous Image & Etiquette guru Gloria Starr who was visiting from the United States. Guests at the event included Iya Oge, Chief (Mrs.) Opral Benson, Mrs. Grace Egbagbe, Prof Yemi Osibanjo, Mrs. Joke Jacobs, Mrs. Folorunsho Alakija, Mrs. Florence Ita-Giwa, Mrs. Ruth Opia, Dr. & Mrs. Tony Rapu, Mrs. Victoria Tandoh, Koko Kalango, and Nkiru Anumundu amongst others.

Gloria Starr, Eme Akenzua with another guest

Mrs Eme and Prince Niyi Akenzua.

Gloria Starr

Chief Mrs Opral Benson and another guest

Koko Kalango and Victoria Tandoh

Dr. and Mrs. Tony Rapu

Grace Egbagbe with another guest

8

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Eme Akenzua and Prof Yemi Osinbajo


events 11th Mike Okonkwo Annual Lecture

Nigeria at 50: Its Leadership, Development and the Future Tola Awoyemi

T

he 11th Mike Okonkwo annual lecture was held recently at the Muson Centre, Onikan, Lagos. The program started with opening remarks from the chairman of the occasion, Rear Admiral (rtd.) Ndubuisi Kanu. The guest lecturer, Major Gen. (rtd.) Ishola Williams delivered an interesting, extensive and thought provoking lecture on the theme ‘Nigeria at 50: Its Leadership, Followership and National Development.

Major General Ishola Williams & Bishop Mike Okonkwo

He defined a leader as someone who knows the way, shows the way and persuades others to go that way. He spoke on the challenges of Nigeria today, the past and how the effects of the past affects the future stating that Decree No. 1 of 1966 was the beginning of the problems in Nigeria because it was unnecessary and uncalled for and the military had no excuse for taking over. General Ishola Williams emphasised that the day Nigeria accepts that they have a problem is the day that change would set in.

Secretary General TREM, Pastor Clement Ohwonigho

He stated that “the beginning of the future is the present and the institutions with the organizations and actors (people in government) of today have to take us to the future. We are far from achieving the MDGs by 2015 neither can the dreams for 2020 be realized. Neither the government, our leaders nor the followers are seriously mobilized for achievement’’.

The students who won awards for their essays with Bishop Okonkwo

The chairman of the occasion, Rear (rtd) Admiral Ndubuisi Kanu ended the lecture with a comment by Bernard Shaw that “A reasonable man adjusts himself to the world but the unreasonable man tries to adjust the world to himself’’. This led to a serious of controversial comments and questions from the audience.

Bishop and Rev Mrs. Mbamara

Young people are always a foundational part of Dr. Mike Okonkwo’s passions. Realizing that change is constant but youth is dynamic and shapes the future, several aspects of this man of God revolves around creating enabling environments for young people to really blossom. One of this is MOEYI- the Mike Okonkwo Educational & Youth Initiative, featuring educational, recreational and youth oriented programs. Bishop Samuel and Rev Mrs Faith Ukaegbu of Faith Cathedral International

Bishop and Rev Mrs Oke with Rev Dr Mercy Ezekiel

One of the initiatives set up under MOEYI is the Annual National Essay Competition which is in its 7th year. The essay competition open to all secondary school students across Nigeria aims to make them learn more about their country, Nigeria and be aware of everything going on in the country in order to make a change in their own generation. Prizes were given to the winners of the 7th Mike Okonkwo Essay Competition during the lecture event. Miss Onyinye Okoli of Vivian Fowler Memorial College for Girls, Oregun, Lagos emerged 1st overall based on an outstanding essay written on the theme of the lecture- Nigeria at 50: Its leadership, development and the Future. She was given a prize money of N100, 000 and laptops and printers for both herself and her school. Ahia Fego of Brilliant Child College, Bariga, Lagos took 2nd position and Ann Iyabode Cliff of Vetland Senior Grammar School, Ifako Ijaiye, Lagos took 3rd position. Consolation prizes were also given to the 4th-9th position.

Henry Okan, James Njida and Folarin Jaiyeola

Bishop Samuel and Rev Mrs Faith Ukaegbu of Faith Cathedral International

The event ended with a closing prayer from Bishop Mike Okonkwo, and the announcement of 30 scholarship awards to commemorate his 65th birthday.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

9


events

Aboloré and Adeleke’s Alluring Wedding

Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit impediments,” wrote the poet William Shakespeare, hundreds of years ago. And so on Saturday, October 9, 2010 in Festac Town– Lagos, Nigeria, former Miss Wosilat Aboloré Sanni was joined in holy matrimony to Adeleke “Mai Nasara” Olufemi Adeyemi, by Pastor Adeniyi Adekunle of The Strong Nation (TSN) Ministries, witnessed by their families and friends, colleagues and associates, from far and near. The grand event was preceded by traditional nuptial rites on Friday, October 8, 2010. Adeleke Adeyemi is a Senior Writer with TIMELESS magazine.

10

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Pastor Ituah Ighodalo and The Couple


Cover feature

T

he Origins of Christmas Explanations abound on the origin of Christmas. From spiritual to mundane, the arguments are as diverse as their explicators! While the popular thinking in most other parts of the world today links the Christmas season to the nativity of Jesus, sceptics insist Christ could not be honoured by it, because the observance of Christmas traditions has its roots in Roman custom and religion or Paganism. But where and when exactly did it all begin? “December 25th probably originated with the ancient “birthday” of the son-god, Mithra, a pagan deity whose religious influence became widespread in the Roman Empire during the first few centuries A.D. Mithra was related to the Semitic sun-god, Shamash, and his worship spread throughout Asia to Europe where he was called Deus Sol Invictus Mithras. Rome was well-known for absorbing the pagan religions and rituals of its widespread empire. As such, Rome converted this pagan legacy to a celebration of the god, Saturn, and the rebirth of the sun god during the winter solstice period. The winter holiday became known as Saturnalia and began the week prior to December 25th. The festival was characterized by gift-giving, feasting, singing and downright debauchery, as the priests of Saturn carried wreaths of evergreen boughs in procession throughout the Roman temples. Variations of this pagan holiday flourished throughout the first few centuries after Jesus Christ, but it probably wasn’t until 336 AD that Emperor Constantine officially converted this pagan tradition into the “Christian” holiday of Christmas,” wrote one writer. Still, another writer comments: “If we are to find the roots of the Christmas traditions, we may need to go back to the age of Mesopotamian culture, which had the tradition of celebrating New Year. The same kind of tradition was also part of Persian and Babylonian cultures. They had the festival called the ‘Sacaea’. On the other hand, there was also a festival in Scandinavia known as ‘Yule’, which was celebrated during the winter months. All these festivals have had great impact on the present day Christmas. The customs of the modern age Christmas started in the middle Ages. The carol became associated with the birth of Jesus Christ since the 14th century. The Saints Day has also contributed in a great way to Christmas History. With the course of time, a number of other customs also got associated with the occasion.”

The Christmas Story Godwin Thomas

It is hardly probable that a consensus will ever be reached on the actual origin of Christmas. The Encyclopedia Americana, 1956 edition, notes that “Christmas…was not observed in the first centuries of the Christian church, since the Christian usage in general was to celebrate the death of remarkable persons rather than their birth…a feast was established in memory of this event [Christ’s birth] in the fourth century. In the fifth century the Western Church ordered the feast to be celebrated forever on the day of the Mithraic rites of the birth of the sun and at the close of the Saturnalia, as no certain knowledge of the day of Christ’s birth existed.” In the same vein, an American newspaper, The Buffalo News, Nov. 22, 1984 remarked: “The earliest reference to Christmas being marked on Dec. 25 comes from the second century after Jesus’ birth. It is considered likely the first Christmas celebrations were in reaction to the Roman Saturnalia, a harvest festival that marked the winter solstice—the return of the sun—and honoured Saturn, the god of sowing. Saturnalia was a rowdy time, much opposed by the more austere leaders among the still-minority Christian sect. In spite of the discrepancies in historical views regarding the origin of Christmas, one probable fact is that the concept of Christmas may have been developed to replace ancient pagan traditions as Christianity grew and became more acceptable. “It began as a means of replacing the worship of the sun with worship of the Son…” Christmas in Modern Times From November onwards, it is impossible to forget that Christmas is around the corner. From travel plans to discount buys and splendid neighbourhood makeovers, Santa Claus, Mistletoe, Christmas trees, holly wreaths, and exchanging of gifts, all bearing different relevance in the tradition, the season

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

11


cover feature bubbles over with activities in a whole new way. Usually, in preparation for the season, “major cities and shopping centres are lit with elaborate coloured lights, in streets and shops, ‘Christmas trees’—real or plastic evergreen ‘conifer’ trees—will also be decorated with lights and Christmas ornaments. By mid-December, most homes will also be decorated with Christmas trees, coloured lights and paper or plastic decorations around the rooms. These days, many more people also decorate garden trees or house walls with coloured electric lights.”

Despite being a nominal Christian holiday, Christmas is also widely celebrated by many non-Christians. Modern celebratory customs of Christmas also have secular themes and origins; some of which include gift-giving, an exchange of greeting cards, church celebrations, music, a special meal, and the display of various decorations; including Christmas trees, lights, garlands, and nativity scenes. In addition, several similar mythological figures, known as Saint Nicholas, Father Christmas and Santa Claus among other names, are associated with bringing gifts to children during the Christmas season. Shopping centres become busier as December 12

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

approaches and often stay open till late. Shopping centre speaker systems will play Christmas ‘carols’ - the traditional Christmas Christian songs. Most work places will hold a short Christmas party about a week before Christmas. Although traditional Christmas foods may be eaten, little work will be done after the party!

as early as October. In Canada, merchants begin advertising campaigns just before Halloween (October 31), and step up their marketing following Remembrance Day on November 11. In the United States, it has been calculated that a quarter of all personal spending takes place during the Christmas/holiday shopping season.

In many countries, most people post Christmas greeting cards to their friends and family, and these cards will be hung on the walls of their homes. Also,

Figures from the U.S. Census Bureau reveal that expenditure in department stores nationwide rose from $20.8 billion in November 2004 to $31.9 bil-

hampers (a collection different gifts items) are sent to friends and family, especially to those who are wealthier!

lion in December 2004, an increase of 54 percent. In other sectors, the pre-Christmas increase in spending was even greater, there being a November – December buying surge of 100 percent in bookstores and 170 percent in jewellery stores. In the same year employment in American retail stores rose from 1.6 million to 1.8 million in the two months leading up to Christmas,”.

The Christmas Season and Business Around the world, Christmas typically presents bumper business opportunities and economic stimulus. During the season, the global retail industry will witness significant increases in sales volumes. Manufacturers, as well as store label owners will extend their product lines by introducing new products. In the U.S. , the “Christmas shopping season” generally begins on the day after Thanksgiving (often referred to as Black Friday), though many American stores begin selling Christmas items

The direct impact of Christmas is often felt on certain businesses than others. The aviation, transportation, and tourism industries generally receive dramatic boost as more people travel for holidays during the season. In Nigeria for instance, easterners are notorious for their custom of reunion during


cover feature initially been chosen to correspond with either the day exactly nine months after some early Christians believed Jesus had been conceived, the date of the winter solstice on the ancient Roman calendar, or one of various ancient winter festivals. Christmas is central to the Christmas and holiday season, and in Christianity marks the beginning of the larger season of Christmastide, which lasts twelve days. The Roman Catholic Church is widely credited with upholding the traditions of Christmas; nevertheless, many Protestant and Pentecostal Churches now celebrate the season to commemorate the birth of Jesus Christ. The Christmas season or Christmastide is regarded as one of the seasons of the liturgical or ‘Church Year’ of most churches. A liturgical year consists of the cycles of liturgical seasons in Christian churches, which determines when feast days are to be observed, and which portions of scripture are to be read. The Christmas season tends to be defined as the period from Christmas Eve to the evening of January 5, the day before Epiphany (or the feast day in which the revelation of ‘God the Son’ as a human being in Jesus Christ is celebrated). This period is usually referred to as the Twelve Days of Christmas, as in the popular carol. There are divergent views on the scriptural relevance or connection of Christmas or ‘Christ Mass’ with Christ. Some who oppose the tradition argue that Christ did not specifically instruct the early Church to celebrate his birth as He did regarding his death, and so dismiss the practice as ‘the tradition of men’. Others justify their involvement practice based on the story of the ‘three wise men’ in the Gospel of Luke in the Holy Bible, who visited with Jesus and His earthly parents to acknowledge His birth, with expensive gifts. Christmas and Planning The Christmas season is typically a watershed as it ends one year and begins another. One key highlight of the season for businesses, governments and individuals alike is planning for the coming year. Goals are reviewed to assess how much had been achieved in the outgoing year, and milestones are set for the coming year. ‘The New Year Resolution’ is one popular phenomenon with individuals all across the globe. And it is jokingly said that only about five percent of individuals will continue to stick with their New Year resolutions beyond the month of March.

the Christmas season. The ‘Ibos’ travel from far and near to be with their kin on their ‘home soil’, a practice which tremendously boosts revenue within the local travel industry. Some industries completely dependent on Christmas include Christmas cards, of which 1.9 billion are sent in the United States each year, and live Christmas Trees, of which 20.8 million were cut in the USA in 2002. One report says that from 3 weeks before Christmas, the postal agencies in the

UK estimate to handle at least one million cards, each day. Decoration is another industry, which is directly boosted by the Christmas season, as homes, malls, halls and streets are decorated to mark the season. Christmas and Christianity Christmas is a holiday observed generally on December 25 to commemorate the birth of Jesus, the central figure of Christianity. The date is not known to be the actual birthday of Jesus, and may have

Christmas and You Whatever your views may be about Christmas, its origins and or its celebration; one thing is certain, it has become part and parcel of our modern lives, one which no matter you culture, religion or political persuasion, you cannot just ignore. It is a time and an opportunity for us all to reflect, to rejoice, to relax, to plan, to show love, and to generally be jolly. Christmas is a season that cannot just be wished away. The very atmosphere surrounding the season is ‘infectious’. We wish all our readers a merry Christmas.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

13


Life & Society FAMILY

RELATIONSHIPS

HEALTH

EDUCATION

SCIENCE

The Introverted Personality – It’s Not Wrong, It’s Just Different

A

n introverted personality is surrounded by a mystery that many people find hard to understand, and despite the fact that introverts are rarely the bubbly type, their reserved personality makes them stand out in the crowd. This makes them highly susceptible to being perceived as anti-social, aloof and snobbish, which may suggest that they have a second-rate personality.

However, contrary to what most people think, introversion is not a personality disorder or a sociopathic behaviour neither is it an uncommon personality type. Although

Have you ever wondered why some people you know prefer to stay at home to watch TV or read a book rather than go spend a night out at the club, or why they feel drained after large outdoor activities and are sometimes inept at small talk? Do you find it awkward that they always feel the need to spend time alone and prefer to cling to the sidelines rather than be the center of attention? Shola Okubote takes a look at introversion as a commonly misunderstood personality.

unfamiliar people, being around many people for a long time drains their energy and would make them long for a time alone to do things they love to do. Spontaneity may also not be one of their strengths because they take time to think and analyze things before they talk or make decisions. This however doesn’t mean they lack good social and communication skills or that do not like people or enjoy their company.

an introvert is the urge to draw them out of their supposed shells. Introverts don’t need to be fixed to become extroverts, just as extroverts don’t need to change to introverts! It is not a right or wrong situation, no personality is superior to the other. Like introversion, extroversion is also a hard-wired temperament; they are both unique in their own ways, each with its own set of strengths and weaknesses.

Psychotherapist and author, Marti Olsen Laney, in her book titled, The Introvert Advantage, also gave an interesting description of the two personalities, she says ‘’Introverts are like a rechargeable battery. They need to stop expending energy and rest in order to recharge. This is what a less stimulating environment provides for introverts. It restores energy. It is their natural niche. Extroverts are like solar panels. For extroverts, being alone, or inside, is like living under a heavy cloud cover. Solar panels need the sun to recharge—extroverts need to be out and about to refuel’’.

A blogger and introvert has this to say about it, “I think one of the most difficult aspects of being an introvert is dealing with those people in our lives who want us to become extroverts. I have experienced this phenomenon many times with individuals who I didn’t feel the need to impress or explain myself to”

Are They Normal? Paula, a teenage introvert says one of the things she finds so unpleasant is when people keep asking her if there is something wrong with her because she is quiet. “Sometimes I just want to be quiet, how does that make me abnormal?” she asks. Introversion and extraversion has been the subject of many studies for centuries, and almost all the personality theories have touched on the introvertish traits. A study conducted by Debra Johnson, Ph.D., and John S. Wiebe, Ph.D., has also shown that the wide difference in the behaviour of extroverts and introverts is because they show different activity in different brain structures. This means that introverts are normal. Extroverts are normal. Neither of the personalities is a disorder, and there is also no ideal personality. They are just wired differently and their uniqueness influences their pattern of behaviour.

some people have argued that only a quarter of the world’s population are introvertish, well known Psychologist Laurie Helgoe, says ‘’ there is no precise dividing line, there are plenty of introverts around. It’s just that perceptual biases lead us all to overestimate the number of extroverts among us ’’. Introverts spend more time thinking and figuring out their environment and other people than they do talking, they enjoy exploring their thoughts and feelings. They may avoid social gatherings especially large ones with many

14

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Are They Shy? If you think introverts are shy, antisocial, depressed and passive, you are wrong! Although many people think the words shy and introvert mean the same thing, they aren’t the same. For instance a shy person might stay away from a party because of irrational fear or anxiety when around people, introverts however, don’t feel like that (unless they are also shy), they would stay away because they don’t find it worthwhile and would rather be doing something else or because it will drain their energy. Many introverts are in fact very confident people who are not easily influenced by peer pressure, they often develop close friendships and much prefer a few close friends to many acquaintances. Do They Need To Change? One of the mistakes most people make when relating with

Most introverts enjoy who they are and are not looking to change; they achieve their goals, make friends and have fun in their own way, which might not necessarily be the way an extrovert would do it. It is a great misconception to think introverts are miserable and don’t have what it takes to achieve their goals in an extroverted world. Successful people like Julia Roberts, Meg Ryan, Meryl Streep, David Letterman, Barbara Walters, Christina Aguilera, Late Katharine Graham, and Gwyneth Paltrow, are all known to be introverts! Sophia Dembling in her article titled ‘Introverts Unite’, expressed what many introverts will like to say to the world, “I am not shy, socially awkward or in any way (that I know of) socially inept. I don’t hate people, I’m not unfriendly, I’m not stuck up, and I am perfectly capable of carrying on a conversation. I can even speak in public and do so fairly often. To meet me, you might think I’m extroverted. But the difference between extroverts and introverts is not that the former are good at socializing and the latter aren’t. It’s that extroverts are outwardly focused and draw energy from social interactions while introverts are inwardly focused and drained by interactions.’’

Shola Okubote writes on women’s growth and general lifestyle issues for print and online magazines. She is the publisher of www.femmelounge. org, an online magazine for young women. She is passionate about international development and women issues. She enjoys reading magazines, watching TV especially talk shows and spending time with her five sisters and four nieces! She loves tea, coke and rice in all its variety!


Life & Society

Berry Madness

I

remember a friend of mine writing a note on Facebook about the Blackberry craze and why some people looked down on you if you were not holding a Berry. At the time I commented about conversation being more important than using a phone as a metre of someone’s social status or skills. Little did I know that I would have to become part of the fray and actually take a side. At the time, my comment was a half hearted attempt at being part of an online conversation. But I am jumping in now, with both feet. I own a Blackberry but I have not activated the features yet. Crazy right? No. My not activating my Blackberry is not for want of money or because the 5000 naira per month surcharge is too expensive for me. I just decided that I will do it when I am good and ready. I am not a stingy ‘koko’, neither am I an ‘akagon’. I just happen to be a rare breed. Maybe because I did not have to scrimp and save every hard earned kobo to buy it and own it, I do not feel this killer needs to constantly be on Facebook in a constant streaming conversation with the world. Does this make me strange? No. it just makes me, a rare breed. I am tech savvy enough to process and handle the information and without reading the manual that came with this smartphone, I have been able to navigate and as a mark of my prowess, I have become a senior adviser on Blackberry issues in my household all without even receiving one pin message or a Facebook update so you know, it is not for lack of knowledge. I tend to notice the way people treat you differently when you answer a call or a pin message on a Berry. In my case, it is always calls or texts. I have been spoken to and treated differently in a saloon just because I answered a call on my phone. I suddenly found that I was moved from being just a stray walk in customer to having an attendant suddenly being interested in making my hair, doing my nails and even getting me a drink in a hair salon I visited recently. Ooo the power of the Berry! So, what is making everyone go crazy? What is it about the Berry? I guess you know already, at least most of it. You can do office work on the go and organise your life. It was made as a time saving tool for executives for who time is always of the essence. But in Nigeria, it has become not only the ultimate office tool but also the ultimate social tool. If you think I am joking, check the Facebook wall and see how many comments have ”sent in by Facebook for Blackberry” written under them. So the average Nigerian who is not necessarily a high powered executive use their BB for social status and socialising or for a term they like to use ‘networking 24/7.’ So when does all this reach a head? When you find out that you have only relationships on your Blackberry as face time is totally reduced? Is my imagination too far out? I know technological advancement is a good thing but what was so bad about 1984? You know, those good old days when you told someone where you were going? When a full night’s sleep was

assured with no midnight calls? When people did not have a fixation on answering every single mail immediately and the fact that you did not comment back immediately on your Facebook page was not a no/no? Did the world come to an end because we were not constantly communicating? Did businesses crash because a mail was not replied immediately? Did someone die from not having someone to ping in the middle of the night? With the advent of these gadgets that take more out of us than they give, we find ourselves doing things that are utterly wrong both in our manners and in our face to face relationships. The one I cannot stand is the constant tapping away on the BB. While driving, while having a conversation maybe while bathing! What can be right about having a conversation with someone who is sitting beside you and not even looking at their face throughout the conversation because you just gotta send that pin message now? I have never heard people being mad at someone for not replying a chat message but try this in a face to face conversation and see. The second thing I have noticed is that with all these constant intrusions, sometimes we lose sight of what is really important. Like face time with our closest and dearest. God knew that communication was important and a part of who we are but can you compare the enjoyment you get from a face to face conversation with a ‘pingsation’, never. So take time to cultivate those relationships, let it go beyond chat messages and pinging, face time cannot be exchanged for anything. With the advent of these gadgets, adultery and all kinds of relationships have taken different shapes than it was in the old days. What do you call a business associate who though you are not in a sexual or physical relationship with constantly has your attention via your Blackberry whether it is to discuss a busi-

ness deal or complain about trivial personal issues? So you see how far this Berry madness can go. Finally, if this is what technology has brought forth, what will it be like in say 20 years? Will we only be able to have lucid conversations in an alternate reality? I hope there will still be a few of us who will know just how far we can take our love for these gadgets and realise that the best relationships involve touch, nuances, conversation, eye to eye contact, a smile and emotions and time not words and emoticons alone. So my question is ‘Are you Berry mad? Adetola Asabo is a warm person who loves to write, likes making new friends and meeting new people. The University of Lagos graduate of Insurance is extremely confident and comfortable in her skin. She started writing as a form of self expression in secondary school and loves writing about anything that catches her attention. A former Senior Editorial Assistant at TIMELESS, this column is a dream come true for her. Adetola who is happily married says ‘writing is my addiction.’

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

15


Life & Society

Sarah called her husband ‘my lord’ Kehinde Dacosta-Lawrence

Many a times women say ‘he is not my husband’ so that justifies ill treatment. You should take advantage of the opportunity to prepare a male friend or even boyfriend for what he ought to expect in a woman in marriage (men you ought to do the same.) If you have mood swings now and think ‘he’ will take them away, you are wrong my dear, you ought to start working on that now, on your own or with the male friends you have around you. If you lack patience, work on it now, if you can’t cook, clean, care, listen, share, (not just your possessions, but your space as well) you need to start now, no miracle happened when you say ‘I do’

T

he scary ‘S’ word scares more women than men - Submission…the perception is that one signs her life away by accepting this biblical principle. The truth is, no one makes you become submissive. If you think that a man is going to walk into your life, sweep you off your feet and you suddenly become submissive, I am sorry to burst your bubble. For lack of a better metaphor, that would be ‘infatuational’ submission and it won’t last, if the desire to be submissive was not there in the first place. When that man stops doing or being that dreamy knight, the smoke clears and the ‘infatuational’ submission goes with it. Many do not appreciate that we live in a world where you can practice who you want to be, before you get married. In biblical times, women had to teach daughters what they should do, the daughters did not have male friend/boyfriends to practice on (I am not talking sex.) In our day and age, you have an opportunity to cook, clean, interact, etc. with male friends to check on your skills, but instead, most will say ‘I will do that when I get married’. Yes, some will do them, but for how long? 16

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

What makes you give more to a man that you see once or twice a week, than the one you see everyday? A warped sense of priorities, I call it. How many women are willing to carry their male friend/ boyfriend/or even husband’s notes and Bible into the church on Sundays? But, women would almost kill each other to carry the Pastor’s, they will have water for him, some will kneel down or courtesy to greet him, but he is not your husband, probably will never be because he has his own wife. The bottom line is that you have made yourself believe that he deserves it just because he is a pastor. Your male friend/boyfriend/husband should get the same and more just because he is that, the reason you can do this for the pastor is the same reason you can do it for you husband to be, you choose to. The man does not have to do anything fantastic for you to do it, you choose to do it. It is a choice one makes and then you practice it till you perfect it. I choose to be patient, not because I have a good husband, but because I chose to be but having a good husband helps, still his good nature will always be secondary to my choice. This perception that no one can teach you anything is so wrong, people are in your life for that purpose, for you to have a swinging door of ‘I build you up

and you build me up’ but, we don’t take advantage of it. Unfortunately the warped sense of priorities is why some (and I say some) pastors take advantage of women, even some married women, because they have assigned a position to him (the pastor) greater than their husband’s. Sarah, called her husband lord, hmm, she gave him the respect of a lord in her life. She even did it to a fault, such that when the Lord told them she would be pregnant, she took matters into her own hands. The truth of the matter is, most are afraid of this ‘S’ word, but the one that has them is a greater ‘S’ word…Stubbornness Kehinde Dacosta-Lawrence, one of Paulina and Jonathan’s twin boys.


Life & Society

Avoiding ‘Alopecia’ Titilope Oyelade

P

eople often mistake alopecia for something only men experience. However more women are beginning to come forward as sufferers of hair loss. It is normal to shed some hair each day as part of the growth cycle. However, some people may experience excessive (more than normal) hair loss. Hair loss in women can include total balding, thinning or anything in between the two. It can be temporary or permanent. Often women experience excessive hair loss due to a medical condition and when the condition is discovered and controlled, the hair loss subsides. The medical name for hair loss is alopecia. Some women experience hair loss due to a hormone imbalance (common after childbirth and during pregnancy), an undiagnosed disease or stress. Often, women are born with genes that make them susceptible to genetic hair loss associated with aging. Other causes of hair loss in women are linked to the thyroid, vitamin deficiency and diabetes. If a woman’s hormones are not balanced, she can experience excessive hair loss. This is a common occurrence in women who aren’t very tolerant of birth control pills or other hormonal contraception options. If women are lacking estrogen or progesterone and are experiencing hair loss, they will likely be prescribed a hormone replacement therapy system (HRT). This will give their bodies the hormones they need and naturally help restore hair growth. Much like the loss of testosterone in men, a loss of female hormones can be the cause of hair loss in women. Some medicines can cause hair loss. Medicines that can cause hair loss include blood thinners (also called anticoagulants), medicines used for gout, high blood pressure or heart problems, vitamin A (if too much is taken), and antidepressants. Certain infections can also cause hair loss. Fungal infections of the scalp can cause hair loss in children. The infection is easily treated with antifungal medicines. While hair loss in women can be difficult to cope with, it’s important to know there are many solutions available. Women now have access to many treatments and medications which can quickly restore hair growth. In addition, while they’re waiting for the hair growth treatment to take action, they can take advantage of terrific wigs and trendy hair extensions made for those with thinning hair! Finally, hair loss may occur as part of an underlying disease, such as lupus or diabetes. Since hair loss may be an early sign of a disease, it is important to find the cause so that it can be treated. Though we have so many prescribed chemical/medical treatments for alopecia, but I suggest you undertake the

natural way of preventing hair loss. Below are some useful guides: Take care of your hair. This is the most important thing. The overuse of hair dyes, curling irons and hairdryers is one of the leading causes of hair loss in both men and women. Try to identify when the hair loss started and if you changed anything with your hair. For example if you started straightening it or if you started applying lots of mousse. It is likely that this could be the reason. If you find it was due to the use of these things then stop using them. Never stretch the hair by braiding very tightly as this can lead to significant hair loss as well. Never colour your hair more often than 6 to 8 weeks and for hair loss prevention, letting your hair turn naturally gray is the best thing you can do. Manage stress: Try and reduce stress or anxiety that is getting to you. Tension and anxiety do not help as you will be so worried your body won’t be mentally healthy so this will lead to physical deterioration, which includes hair loss. Meditation can help in reducing that and restore hormonal balance.

shower gel. If it is repeatedly changed it could cause damage to your hair as shampoos aren’t natural; you would be adding more and more chemical products in your hair which could damage them and cause them to fall out. Oiling the hair also helps with coconut oil for example. By doing this, when you go out, the pollution in the environment won’t stick straight onto your hair and damage it. It will stick to the oil instead which can be washed off when you get home. Wash your hair regularly, unclean hair could contain lots of damaging things. Frequent washing can help keep hair clean and healthy. Wash with warm to normal temperature water. Too much hot water can also damage the hair. Most important is to have a healthy and regular lifestyle. Sleep enough and sleep on time.

Eating healthy: Eating the right foods is something else you can do for hair loss prevention. Adding calcium in your diet is very important to strengthen the hair follicles and roots in the scalp. Vitamin A is an anti-oxidant which promotes healthy production of sebum in the scalp. Vitamin E stimulates circulation. Good blood circulation in the scalp is important in keeping hair follicles productive. The ‘B’ vitamins contribute to melanin, which gives hair its healthy colour and also stimulates blood circulation. Hair Massage: stimulates circulation, good circulation in the scalp keeps hair follicles active. Experts suggest a few minutes of daily head massage by hand. Circulation could be improved by using a few drops of lavender or bay essential oil in an almond or sesame oil base with massage. Stick to one shampoo or

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

17



Living & St yle

FASHION BEAUTY FOOD HOMECARE GADGETS CARS LEISURE

Christmas Chocolate Delights This season is such a period everyone would love to have or give a treat to their special and loved ones. Parents especially mothers would like to make special delicacies for their children and in most cases, chocolate can never be an exception to what people would love to have a bite of. These great hits will work for any holiday occasion, from open houses to cookie exchange parties. They also make delightful hostess gifts and party favours. So you can try the following chocolate recipes, very easy to make without chemicals and they are very fast to make. Enjoy this season with the hearty, delicious chocolate recipes below.

MARBLED CHOCOLATE MUFFINS Large bag of pretzels, or 2 bags depending on how To make these great looking marbled chocolate muffins you will Chocolate Pretzels need: Ingredients 280g/10oz self-raising flour 115g/4oz caster sugar 2 eggs 250ml/9fl oz milk 6 tbsp sunflower oil 2tbsp cocoa powder 1tsp vanilla extract Method Preheat the oven Line a muffin tin with 12 paper muffin cases. Sift the flour into a large mixing bowl. Add the sugar and stir. Beat the eggs into a large jug and add the milk, oil and vanilla extract, beat well. Make a well in the dry ingredients and pour in the liquid ingredients. Chocolate Fudge Fold together gently without over mixing. Put half the mixture into another bowl. Sift the cocoa powder into one of the bowls and mix together until evenly combined. Using teaspoons fill the muffins cases alternating between the 2 mixtures to give the marbled effect. Bake for about 20 minutes until well risen. Transfer the muffins to a wire rack to cool. Store in an airtight container. CHOCOLATE PRETZELS Making chocolate pretzels is a fun activity to do with the kids; even the littlest ones can enjoy doing this. A nice snack for them to enjoy afterwards as well! To make this recipe you will need; Ingredients Chocolate, white, milk or plain depending on your preference

CHOCOLATE ORANGE FUDGE Chocolate Orange Fudge A ‘nocook’ recipe, very easy and suitable for children to make. Ingredients 110g/4oz plain chocolate 50g/2oz butter 4 tbsp evaporated milk 400g/14oz icing sugar Grated rind of 1 orange

Chocolate Muffins

Method Break the chocolate into pieces and place in a bowl with the butter, stand over a pan of hot, but not boiling, water until melted. Add the evaporated milk and the orange rind and stir well. Sieve the icing sugar and gradually mix in. Grease a shallow tin with butter, pour in the mixture, spread flat and allow to set before cutting into squares. Store in an airtight container. HOMEMADE CHOCOLATE

many you want! Anything to decorate them i.e. chopped nuts, chocolate sprinkles or desiccated coconut. Method Place the chocolate in a heatproof bowl, use separate bowls if you are using different types of chocolate. Melt chocolate over a pan of simmering water, adult supervision required for this bit. Carefully dip the pretzels in the chocolate using small tongs or clean tweezers. If decorating with anything do it at this point before the chocolate sets. Place chocolate covered pretzels on waxed paper on a baking sheet. Chill in the fridge to set. Now you have had fun making them you can have fun eating them

Ingredients 1000 g sugar 200 ml water 50 ml rum shopping list 4 tablespoon cocoa powder (unsweetened) 500 g milk powder 400 g nuts 250 g butter Method Mix sugar with cocoa, add water, rum and cook it until it starts to boil and sugar is melted. Stir in butter, milk powder, nuts (these you can roast). Mix all well and pour into a form where you put some foil before. After it is cool down cut in pieces and keep in silver foil.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

19


Living & Style

The Feet, Finger and Face that Speaks Taiye Tunkarimu

A

part from the saying that goes thus ‘dress the way you want to be addressed’, your face, fingers and feet speaks volume about who you are. When you walk into a gathering, all eyes are not only on your dress but your face, feet and fingers. As a lady, trust, every other lady wants to check out your shoes, the rings you have on, the accessories, make-up, and your hair if it’s in good condition and in the right shape. Remember, every woman’s hair the Bible says is her glory, so the rule about always keeping it neat, tidy and well done must not be violated and I faithfully pledge to that. Imagine you stretch forth a hand shake to a client and he/she refuses because your nails are dirty and not enticing or welcoming so to speak. These are

after a night bath and the pimples will be all gone! Yaok! Heewww! Did I hear you say?

blot it gently with a towel. Your morning facial care can be done in the shower.

Caring for our finger nails, feet and face requires a lot of time and attention which also contributes to our well-being and good health. Health they say is wealth. The fingers, feet and face are very crucial to helping us get this wealth.

Next, apply a moisturizer or day cream. This should be specialized to your skin type. A moisturizer leaves the skin feeling softer and smoother. It also helps smooth away fine lines and dryness. Next, apply your make-up (if you choose to wear make-up). Your foundation should match your skin tone. Never use a darker foundation than your skin tone; it should look natural.

Remedy The first measures to be undertaken for preventive foot care is the selection of shoes and socks that fit well. Women are more likely to develop foot problems, because of the heels, so avoid wearing them as much as possible or remove them at every opportunity to prevent sore feet. Put feet up whenever possible to keep the blood flowing and wriggle toes for up to 5 minutes. Walking is considered good for the feet as well as for general health. Choose footwear made of leather or canvass that will allow the feet to breathe. Wash feet daily, rinse and dry thoroughly, especially between the toes. Avoid digging out and cutting at corners; this could result to ingrown toe nails. Remove rough skin gently by first soaking feet in warm water then gently scrubbing with a small towel, indulge in feet massage as regularly as possible, and have a pedicure about once a week to keep toes pretty. Air out your shoes for at least a day before you wear them again.

little details that demand serious attention. Oh I hear some men say, we don’t have a problem because we wear a pair of socks and shoes that prevents our feet from dirt. Hmmmmm, has anyone ever been where some guys take off their socks and shoes after a hard day’s work? Then you know what I’m talking about. I saved the best for last because this is a very important part of the body that gives us women a lot of concern. The Face! During one of my girls time out with some friends, as usual, women love to gist and talk about anything and almost everything and trust we cannot do without talking about our bodies and the things we experience as special creatures of God. One of the girls was seriously worried about the pimples on her face and complained bitterly about how much money she had spent on getting a remedy. And one of the girls gave a disgusting solution, I beg of you, P-L-E-A-S-E do not try it out. She suggested she used a sanitary towel (a used one) to rub her face 20

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Your hands are on the go as much as you are. From picking stuffs with it to pecking away at your text messages, they’re working for you. Show them you appreciate the hard work by giving them the care they need. After your face, they’re the part of your body people notice most. So, grab your gloves always and exfoliate. Moisturize: For hand care, lotion is crucial washing your hands frequently which you should do, to keep germs away! Massage. When you treat your hands well, your whole outlook can improve. Give yourself a quick hand massage when you apply lotion. Give your hands a little extra attention and hand care and they’ll draw the type of attention you want, with their young, fresh, pretty appearance. Many people take their skin for granted and the skin of the face needs even more attention than the rest of the body because the face has more oil glands, especially the central forehead, eye areas, nose and chin. The care for it in a rush will only take five to ten minutes a day. Morning facials In the morning you should clean your face with lukewarm water and a creamy cleanser or purifying gel wash. Avoid bar soap because this strips the natural moisturizing factors from the skin, leaving it feeling very tight and dry. Do not rub the skin dry. Instead,

Evening facials The evening starts like the morning. First, you should clean your face with lukewarm water and a creamy cleanser or purifying gel wash. These skin cleansers will remove your make-up at the same time you wash your face. Now, while your face is still wet, you should exfoliate. Exfoliating is the process of removing dead skin cells, which cause the face to look dull. Massage gently and rinse well. This can be done every night or 1-2 times a week all depending on the type of exfoliant. Finally, apply a moisturizer Facial care tips Never go to bed with your make-up on. Make-up that is left on overnight clogs the pores and prevents the skin cells from shedding, which may cause blemishes and/or blackheads. The skin needs to breathe over night. Waterproof make-up is most easily removed with a gel cleanser. The most important thing that you can do for your facial skin is to avoid sunlight Sunlight causes the skin to age and causes skin cancer which is the most common malignancy in humans.


Living & Style Immortalizing your favourite sentimental moment or funny joke is a loving thing to do. Jewellery and watches don’t have to be expensive — even the less expensive clearance jewellery and watches are gorgeous. 5. A spa day of pampering. Treat her to a relaxing day of full pampering maybe by paying for a session at a spa retreat or giving her a magic touch of your own massage expertise. It is a very personal gift that she would never forget.

Choosing a Christmas gift for him or her Tola Awoyemi

C

hristmas is one of those periods of the year when we exchange gifts with our friends, relatives and loved ones. Choosing the perfect gift for that special him or her can become arduous, especially if they have everything you think they want. If the perfect gift for him or the perfect gift for her is not, well, perfect, the world will not end. Here are a few gift ideas on how to find that perfect gift. • Give it some thought before you actually enter the mall or shopping centre to buy the gift. Ask yourself what would be the perfect gift for him or the perfect gift for her. You will want to have gift ideas in mind before you enter the shopping centre or you will walk around aimlessly searching for the perfect gift. • Decide what kind of gift you would like to give. Do they have a quirky personality? Would they rather receive a sentimental gift or a humorous gift? What do they really love? • Remember. Take a moment to remember something about them. Perhaps there was an event that you two have shared or a special memory that you could relate to the perfect gift. Frame that special memory, have poetry engraved. Frame a love letter you have written for them in the past for the perfect gift. • Be personal. The perfect gift for him or the perfect gift for her should be personal, after all that is what makes it the perfect gift. Ideas you might consider is engraving something, possibly a piece of jewellery or a music box. Maybe your guy has a hobby? Engrave something that relates to that hobby, tools, golf club, fishing rod or even a remote control if need be. • Pay attention? Have they been hinting about something they would like to receive as a gift? Do they stop what they are doing to watch a certain item on television? Do they have merchandise circled in a

magazine? Is there an item they have longed to have more than once in the past few months? Are they giving you gift ideas all the time? • Keep in mind that if you have bought the perfect gift in the past, the perfect gift you bought for one person will not be the perfect gift for everyone. So do not even think of cheating your way out of this one, think about the one you love and you will come up with gift ideas that relate to their personality. For her 1. A weekend retreat at a nearby bed and breakfast. Treat her to a romantic getaway to a nearby or out of town bed and breakfast and rekindle your feeling with the Christmas season. 2. Victoria‘s Secret or La Senza lingerie: These are romantic and special. It shows that you put a lot of thought to your gift and that you care. Victoria’s Secret Knicki is a great stocking stuffer for your girlfriend; the Knicki is called “the magical knicker” by Victoria’s Secret. This Christmas gift idea for her will make you feel the magic when she slips on a pair of these soft, ruffled bottoms with just the right amount of stretch. In colours like sunshine, pink pop and glam green she’ll adore this girly addition to her underwear drawer. Note: This is not a smart gift idea for a colleague or boss. 3. iPod Touch Accessories: The girl who never leaves the house without her music will love the new GTMax iPod Touch Accessories. She can charge up her iPod wherever she happens to be with a home charger and a car charger. The data cable makes it easy to hook up to her laptop, and she can protect her beloved iPod with the screen protector and hot coloured leather case. Add some soft gel ear buds and she can take her music anywhere in style and comfort. 4. Anything engraved with meaningful words from your heart: wine glasses, a watch, a locket.

For him 1. A luxurious silk, satin or chenille bathrobe with a sensual surprise, such as a book for couples in love, in the pocket. This holiday gift idea is both practical and luxurious. 2. Take him on a romantic dinner. A fancy, candle-light evening at a French or Chinese restaurant with a view will unite the minds and bodies of most lovers, and cheer the saddest of souls. 3. Male fragrances: Fragrances will help him to remember your presence whenever he uses it. Fragrances can create a very romantic ambience. Moreover, these are available at various price points to fit any size budget. However, be sure to check before purchase whether it is intended for male. 4. Gadgets: You can also consider utility electronic gadgets like Automobile GPS Unit, Bluetooth enabled MP3 Player, a new laptop, iPhone, digital camera, MP3 player, etc. You can also consider any gadget or a suitable accessory for the gadget he already owns. 5. Jewellery and wristwatches: Nothing can be compared to jewellery as Christmas gift for him. Bracelets, rings, cufflinks and pendants are among the popular choice. There is no reason to presume that original jewellery will invariably be very expensive. On the contrary, with little bit of effort you can find stunning jewellery within your budget limit.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

21


Living & Style The Best or Nothing: The Mercedes Benz S Class

F

or many luxury car buyers, a Mercedes-Benz S Class is the ultimate statement of proudly displaying excessive wealth without outright flaunting it. Many features of the Mercedes Benz S-Class are unique and remain unrivalled by competitors. Trailblazing innovations in the areas of comfort and drive engineering combined with state-of-the-art technology for enhanced safety consolidate the MercedesBenz flagship’s position as the brand’s innovation driver and underscore its pioneering role in the automotive industry as a whole. New safety features making the Mercedes Benz S-Class one of the safest cars on the road include: Adaptive Highbeam, which is now standard on the Mercedes Benz S-Class and uses eight stages of graduation from dipped to main beam to ensure that maximum visible range from the headlights is available at all time, without dazzling other road users. The Attention Assist, monitors over 70 parameters to detect the onset of drowsiness so it can alert the driver to take a break, crucially, before they fall asleep. Torque vectoring brakes ensure precise cornering without compromising driving dynamics, while Distronic Plus significantly reduces driver strain in start stop traffic through the use of long and medium range radars by keeping the car a set distance from the vehicle in front. 22

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

In line with its self-assured character and its claim to be a technological trendsetter, the S-Class also sets standards where onboard infotainment is concerned. As a world first, on request Mercedes-Benz will equip its flagship model with the new SPLITVIEW technology for the COMAND control and display system centrally located in the centre console. This innovative display concept allows the driver and front passenger to view different content simultaneously on one and the same screen. While the driver uses the map-based navigation system, for example, the front passenger can be watching the latest film on DVD. Musical entertainment is provided by a radio, a CD/DVD player with MP3 function, an equalizer with speed-dependent volume control and the Music Register with a 7.2 GB hard disc which stores around 2500 digital music files in MP3, AAC or WMA format. The system recognises music files played on CD, DVD or from the Music Register using its stored Gracenote® database, and shows the title, album and performer in the colour display. The new Music Search function enables S-Class drivers and passengers to search SD memory cards, USB sticks, CDs and DVDs for specific music titles and performers. COMAND APS also includes the latestgeneration LINGUATRONIC voice-operated control system, which operates the navigation, telephone and audio devices by whole-word commands. This has the advantage that the driver no longer has to

spell out his commands. The “Logic7” surround sound system developed by Mercedes-Benz together with the audio specialists Harman/Kardon® delivers outstanding performance with three-dimensional sound as a natural 360-degree musical experience for all passengers. The modified design reflects the effortless superiority and power of the S-Class Saloon. It is characterised by the more pronounced arrow-shape of the radiator grille, plus a new front bumper with a discreet light-catching contour and a chrome strip below the cooling air intakes. In future the exhaust tailpipes of all S‑Class variants will be visibly integrated into the rear bumper. The headlamps have bi-xenon technology as standard. An even more dynamic look is ensured by the LED Light package with its striking LED arrays for daytime driving lights, indicators and marker lights (standard for S 400 HYBRID and S 600). These lend an unmistakable day-and-night design to the front end. The rear end is characterised by tail lights in an innovative LED design. Here too, a total of 52 LEDs in the form of a double-C form an unmistakable light signature. The Mercedes Benz S-Class continues to impress and be the envy of the boardroom as the halo company car for others to aspire to.


23


BUSINESS FINANCE

MANAGEMENT

TECHNOLOGY

ENTREPRENEURSHIP

TRADE

MARKETING

What is the Colour of Your Business? Terri Lonier Working Solo founder

I

’m going to give you some ideas on how you can scream and make yourself heard even in an overcrowded market. Most “solopreneurs” (a coined word signifying one-man entrepreneurs) are selling something, an idea, a product, a service but then most entrepreneurs never quite get beyond the point of selling, and move into marketing on a much bigger scale. They keep on trucking to make small sales, and get by day to day. Some keep waiting and hoping for the big time job or contract which sometimes proves elusive and finally outlasts their patience and persistence possessed by small entrepreneurs. It’s a crowded market with multinationals that have enormous marketing budgets, solopreneurs - with little startup capital, organizations with hugely successful brands, and thriving entrepreneurs with seemingly bottomless pool of funds for PR. How does a ‘solopreneur’ successfully sell himself in a ‘dog eat dog’ business world where everyone’s fighting for every bit of the customer’s money? We are going to point out some ways a solopreneur can stand out and make a difference. From experience I have learnt the following lessons

3 Key Lessons • The customer’s perception of you is at least as important as who you are - always consider your personal image (haircut, business suit, shoes). • Most people still and often will judge a book by its cover - includes your paper image (letterheads, business cards, brochures, and website). • Always consider the eye of the beholder and you can fool some of the people some of the time (appear the image of success) Among youths in Nigeria there is a slang or slogan called ‘washing’- there’s a thin line and slight difference between this phrase, and what in business world is often called branding. The meaning in layman’s term implies creating an intrinsic emotional connection or perceived image on someone about a certain business or product. In the business world a brand may very well mean everything. It’s the differentiation between a software program that can be sold for millions of naira to a bank by a multinational corporation, and another with the same functionalities that a startup solopreneur will find difficult selling for a couple of thousands of naira to the same bank, irrespective of the fact that both software programs are identical. When such incident occurs as they very often do, you can say that the bank has been ‘washed’ by the big corporation. How does a solopreneur successfully ‘wash’ or brand his/her self in today’s competitive market? Consider the following case study as a guide Case Study Ruth decided that her event management company didn’t stand out in anyway from the competition, and very well didn’t stand the chance of ever growing from a micro enterprise into a small or medium size enterprise. Strategy Ruth decided to move from word of mouth referrals, and personal selling; she took a leap into the

24

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

web and used up most of her savings to advertise on social networks online, such as FaceBook, Hi5 and the likes. Outcome Two months after launching her business on the web complete with referrals, testimonials and pictures of her previous events, she was overwhelmed with phone calls from potential clients from across the country requesting her services. Lessons Consider re-evaluating your business. Most times, solopreneurs tend to become bugged down by the tedious nature of their day to day activities that they remain focused on fishing in a small pond while there’s an ocean waiting to be explored. Ask yourself before considering the internet as a viable marketing alternative. Do you have the resources to pursue this strategy? What is the impact of your strategy on your kind of business? Would you be better off going into an internet only operation? Can you make yourself seem larger than life by the web content displayed on your website? How do you get clients to visit your website? The internet represents a cheaper and often more viable means of advertising yourself. While big corporations have the budget to consider advertising on national dailies, television and billboards, a start up business or solopreneur is often left behind. The internet is and still remains an effective and costefficient strategy of being able to create an outlook and perceived value in the minds of clients about a business. Most often what they see when visiting your website determines what impression they have about your services without ever meeting you in person. Alternative ways of making your business stand out especially when selling services (often less expensive strategy than selling products), may include getting trend-setters, industry leaders, or local celebrities to use your products free of charge. You can then leverage on this goodwill by asking for testimonials and subsequently mentioning such often high sounding names during sales presentations, and adding them on your list of clients on your website or business proposal when bidding for a job. This could be all the ‘washing’ you need to position yourself as being already successful and you may end up fooling some of the people some of the time.


Business

What you should know about Franchise Business Jude Chukwuemeka

N

business to the population in your area. It’s fairly easy today to find demographic data for any targeted trade area, so you should start your comparison there.

The truth is that the world is not too small for any kind of business start-up and you do not need to be the first to begin the business in order to be successful. A franchise idea could start with a great restaurant business, a wonderful new type of fast-food sandwich, a unique retail shop or even a service business offering a different twist on something many people will want. Even better, some have discovered a franchise with opportunities available for new franchisees.

Getting Started An example of this might be something like considering a franchise that’s based on attracting the rich or upper class in a neighbourhood. If the business is intended to draw its customers from across the demographic spectrum, that is okay. If you observe most of the existing customers are from the well-todo community, you’ll need to determine if the product being offered will have general appeal to other classes before you proceed in locating such a business anywhere other than in an area with a large elite population. It is also very important to compare the average household income levels of the existing business area to your area. There are a number of businesses that succeed in fairly tight income communities and you need to determine if the business you are considering is one of these.

Today in Nigeria, franchise business is a new spark which delivers the entrepreneurial fire in people. Though this is a wonderful way to spot potential opportunity, there are some important points that a careful investor needs to answer before moving forward. One of the surest ways to begin developing an answer to the question of whether the franchise will work in your area is to compare the demographics of the population supporting the existing successful

What about international franchise opportunity? This can be a wonderful potential, but you need to keep an old saying in mind: “When in doubt, send a scout.” There are so many uncertainties in international franchising that you want to make sure any concept can be successfully transplanted. Probably, the best way for you to go about it is by seeing someone else do it before you invest. Some people say that those other eateries that copied the likes of Mr.

igeria is endowed with numerous people. Today, the country is the most populated in Africa, making it, as they often say, the giant of Africa. No matter what your business model might be, this country offers a better chance for success than most countries. No wonder, many foreigners are falling head over heels to do business in Nigeria and with Nigerians. Even while it seemed that Nigeria is saturated with enough telecom companies, other foreign carriers are still looking for opportunities to penetrate the Nigerian market.

Biggs are also having their fair share of patronise today. Maybe that’s one benefit of waiting to see how the first turned out. It may require more patience to do it this way, but you don’t want to be another pioneer of a failed venture. Why You Need Research Often, the unique and exciting idea you see somewhere and then wonder about putting into your area is a concept that is untested in terms of its general acceptance in the marketplace. That puts you, if you decide to invest, into the position of a true entrepreneur in terms of introducing a new concept to your market. A research into the marketplace can help you decide whether to carry on or to stop the idea. It is recommended that before you start, do a survey of the area to understand what the adaptations would be, if there would be any at all. Make sure to research very carefully to find out whether the concept will work in your area. If it can, then you can go forward and make your business dream come alive. The reason why it is easier for a franchise business to succeed is that people love to deal with well-known brands, not those that are obscure. You want a franchise business that is going to work in your area, and the less doubt you have about that fact, the less risk associated with the franchise investment. This, however, does not mean that it is a lot easier for you to succeed in the franchise business.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

25


Business How to Never Lose an Argument – Resolving Conflicts before They Start

T

he only way to never lose an argument, to paraphrase Dale Carnegie, is to avoid getting into one in the first place. In a discussion everyone wins, but not in an argument. We treat other people as partners in a problem-solving session. We throw out ideas, consider alternatives, and evaluate the pros and cons. We listen to other people’s thoughts and explore ideas we haven’t previously considered. We learn more about an issue, about what we think and feel, and about each other and each other’s values. We seek people’s support, not their resentful silence. We may passionately disagree with each other, but mutual respect keeps the dialogue civil. In an argument no one wins. We treat other people as opponents to be defeated. We draw up sides, defend our own positions, and attack the opposition. If we listen at all, we do so only to find the weaknesses in the other person’s reasoning. We aren’t open to new ideas or to the possibility of changing our opinions. We want to prove the superiority of our side (and the inferiority of the other side). Even when we “win” an argument, we usually do so by losing a potential ally. Here are some tips to keep discussions from turning into arguments. 1. Don’t argue. Refuse to get drawn into an argument. Be civil. Respect the other person as much as your honour your own values. Be assertive without resorting to aggression. 2. Seek areas of agreement. Often, we agree with people in principle, but disagree with them in practice. (We want the same thing — safer schools for our children, for example — but we have different ideas of how to accomplish it.) Find those areas of agreement. Make them explicit. Try always to make the other person a fellow problem-solver, neither an opponent nor a friend. 3. Focus on interests, not positions. An issue is what we want or need. A position is a way of achieving it. Avoid getting so attached to your positions that you lose sight of your interests. It’s often easier to negotiate and compromise around interests than around positions. 4. Try to see things from the other person’s pointof-view. There’s a reason why other people act and think the way they do — however illogical, wrong-headed, or misguided as it may seem to you. If you condemn them or show contempt for their reasoning, they will only harden in their resolve. They will resent and resist you. Seek, instead, to ferret out their hidden reasons, and you will find the key to their motivation.

yourself into trouble by listening, but you can start a brawl by speaking.) Listen with your body, your eyes, and your mind as well as with your ears. Try to understand what people mean, without getting caught up in the exact words they say. Make them feel understood, and they’ll be much more likely to try to understand you.

5. Ask clarifying questions. Ask open-ended questions. Closed questions — like “Do you agree with my proposal?” — limit people’s ability to express themselves. Open-ended questions — like “What do you think about my proposal?” — give them greater freedom and give you more information.

7. If you’re wrong, admit it. There’s nothing wrong with changing your opinion, once you’ve gained new information or perspective. As a matter of fact, it’s the sign of wisdom and maturity. Remember that you’ve been wrong in the past even when you thought you were right, and admit that you may be wrong this time.

6. Listen. Spend more time listening than speaking. (You can’t get

8. If you’re right, allow the other person to save face. You’re trying to win people’s cooperation, not to prove

26

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

them wrong. Your kindness will do more to gain their goodwill than anything else. Adebowale Jeff Johnson, a Human Resource Consultant is the founder/ CEO Jeff Johnson Business Solutions and Jeff Johnson Business School. He is also a member, Board of Director, Grace House Worship Centre. Prior to starting his own business, he has worked with firms like Phillips Consulting Limited, SoftSkills Management Consultants, People Prime Limited, and SIAO. He has spoken at several university campuses and is currently writing a paper to develop quantitative analysis and decision making with the use of data to develop business model that will enhance organizational performance.


Business

Why clients matter more than anything

V

iewing the client as a ‘market space’ will create opportunities for both parties in tough trading conditions.

While the concept of market share is readily understood, the concept of ‘the client as a market space’ is one that needs better appreciation, so as to build mutually rewarding relationships with your clients and in doing so, increasing your share of market within their space. This is not the responsibility of a person or a department. It is not the sole responsibility of the marketing and or the sales department. It is not something you do from time to time, when it suits. It is what business is about, all the time. It is everybody’s responsibility. In these challenging times, viewing the client as a market space is key to creating lots of opportunities to assist your clients in meeting their objectives and, in doing so, identify revenue and profit opportunities for your business. Here are 10 thoughts to assist you and your business through the process: 1. Identify which of your clients present opportunities around this concept. A simple gap analysis will quickly identify which clients present opportunities with that potential over time.

5. Clients matter more than anything. Without them, we don’t have a business. Without a business we can’t create jobs. Show clients they do matter, again and again. Try driving them crazy with attention. It is hard to do, but the rewards make it worthwhile. 6. Capturing enough of the right clients to form critical mass is always a hurdle. It is important one doesn’t accept work from every prospect as it will prevent you from focusing on the right clients. These are your bread and butter. Don’t lose sight of them, ever. 7. Become indispensable to your clients; weave yourself into their business by adding additional value beyond the scope of the assignment. Add your company’s brainpower to the relationship. Clients won’t forget. It keeps the opposition at bay too, while allowing you to cement the relationship. 8. While you might like your point of view, the clients normally prefer theirs. Selling is all about listening. It is not about telling or talking. Tune into the sound of your clients’ feelings. Try asking questions.

What you will learn will be worth much more than anything you can possibly say. It is far more important to be a partner than an orator. 9. If you want to fascinate a client, be fascinated by them. Learn about their business, as if it were your own. Learn about their industry, as if it were your own. Fall in love with their problems, challenges and opportunities. They will always reward you for doing so. 10. Encourage open, transparent briefing sessions from your clients every six months or annually. This approach will allow a lot of the previous thoughts to be incorporated while at the same time permitting you and your team a learning experience, which in the vast majority of cases identifies new revenue opportunities too. These thoughts will assist you and your business to understand better “the client as a market space” concept. Given that the research in the field of sales shows the cost of acquiring clients is 10 to 15 times that of retaining clients, investing in its concept will pay handsomely in future.

2. Ensure your company is pointed, focused on the client. Let your clients know you are all there for them. Make it simple for them to talk to anyone in your company. Train staff to be competent and comfortable in handling client interactions. Ensure you let your clients know whom to contact for what. A credit card format card will do. 3. Build multilevel and multidepartmental personal relationships. This will ensure the relationship is based on many levels and won’t be at risk should a person leave your client, or if you lose a key person in your business. 4. Doing what clients expect is boring. It is also a sure way to lose them. Business is all about competition for the client’s imagination. The money will come later. If you don’t light your client’s imaginations, don’t expect them to light yours.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

27


ARTs

& Culture

books movies music theatre photography exhibitions architecture

P

roducers and songwriters, Taiwo Lawrence and Kehinde Dacosta-Lawrence pride themselves on their production quality not logged into a particular style. Based on their influences ranging from Bob Dylan to Marvin Gay, Jay Z to Metallica and from Mozart to Earth Wind and Fire, plus having lived on three continents, Africa, Europe and America, their music is a rare and wonderful blend. As record executives, the twins have worked in different capacities and ran several labels including Secret Records, (Sony) Vision Records Atlanta, Which is Which Publishing and Creed Records. Along with writing and producing, the twins have also appeared in seven episodes of the TV show Savannah (Aaron Spelling) and a movie called Black and Blue. They have both just completed two books and are shopping a movie about their great great grandmother and a sitcom centered around two sets of identical twins (one male and one female). They serve as consultants to numerous projects, and are thankful to God for their many blessings. TIMELESS was privileged to have an interview with Kehinde Dacosta Lawrence.

Who are the Lawrence twins? We are a set of gifted identical twins that dance, write and produce music and anything else that can be written. Where and what did you study? We studied in England, ‘O’ and ‘A’ levels and then Advertising and Marketing. Could you give us some personal background about yourself single/married, kids, growing up, etc) I am single…I love God/Jesus/the Holy Spirit and people Where did you grow up? Did you move around a lot? If yes, how did this affect you? If no, how did the stability of living in one place affect you? I grew up, first half here in Lagos and the other half in England. When I was in England, I came back to Nigeria at least twice a year on vacation, and before I moved to England I visited London at least once a year, so both places represented home for me growing up. My mother eventually moved to England in the 80s and that somehow stopped me from coming home (to Lagos) for 23 years. Tell us about your music, your style and motivation I do a variety of styles, R&B, Soul, Hip-Hop, House, Reggae, Jazz, Rock and Gospel. I have been blessed with the gift to create, and with an even bigger gift, which is the opportunity to earn a living using the gift. When I was younger, my motivation was the desire to play music, (knowing that it is what GOD gave me the gifts for.) When I got older, I had an accident that damaged my right hand and was told by 3 different doctors that I would never be able to use the hand to write, bounce a ball and to forget ever being able to play the keyboards again but I did not accept their diagnoses…today, I play basketball, write and play the keyboards better than before the accident. My motivation is now the idea

Arts & Culture Events Diary

Have your arts and culture events publicised on this page. For your book launch or presentation, arts exhibitions, music releases, film shows, theatre presentations etc. Send details to timeslesscourage@yahoo.co.uk or call 01-4358330 28

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Kehinde Dacosta Lawrence


Arts & Culture that God really has confirmed that He wants me doing music for a reason. Tell us about some of the people you have worked with I have truly been blessed, I have worked with the following in one capacity or the other- Usher, Kashif, Colonel Abrams, Eddie Murphy, Barry White, Jagged Edge, Russell Simmons, Salt & Pepper, TI, Lil Bow Wow, Aaron Spelling, Cobhams, Wole Oni, to mention a few. Tell us about your magazine and other things you are involved in (T.V show, movies etc) The magazine is called Uzuri, it’s a lifestyle magazine…it’s slowly but surely making its mark. We have a few ideas we are working on to help put some structure into the music business here…a movie and TV projects as well…the movie is based on a true story, watch out for it… Why did you decide to become a writer/ producer/ artiste? Actually, I did not decide…I was born with the gifts, and blessed to have had a mother who did everything to encourage me. She had a revelation 20 years before we were born that she would be having a set of gifted identical twins…she bought a piano in anticipation…so the piano I learnt how to play on was literally 20 years older than me. Do you have any special training that has prepared you to be a better musician, writer and consultant? Or does it come naturally? It comes naturally, but I studied classical piano for six years, I also spend a lot of time practicing and studying other musicians… What are the challenges you face doing what you do and how do you address these? I had not faced any real challenges until I moved back home two years ago…unfortunately, we do not have a structured music industry here, which makes it extremely difficult to function…I am hoping that I can share some of my experiences here to help put one in place. What is the next project you are working on to add to your repertoire? At the moment, I am doing some jingles…I am also working on the movie I mentioned above and bits and pieces here and there. What is most rewarding about your career; what makes it all worthwhile? The opportunity to use something that God gave me is what makes it worthwhile…getting paid while doing it is secondary, but a nice added bit. Are there any political or social issues you feel passionately about? I am bothered by the selfish nature of our country; we are only concerned about self. The reason we have no power supply, good roads, money et al, is based on a selfish mindset…the ‘as long as I have, I could care less about you’ attitude. Until we realise that being a Nigerian does not matter if you are Igbo, Hausa or Yoruba, then what concerns the West will bother the North and all will fix it etc., we will continue to have people come into power take (cause they do not believe it is stealing) for themselves and theirs and nothing will get done. What has so far been the most exciting point of your career? I have been blessed to have worked with a lot of noted people…but getting to work with the late Barry White I think for me, is the most memorable thus far. I grew up listening to him and never in my wildest dreams did I think I would get to meet him let alone work with him. He ended up being like a godfather to my brother and I and by far the most pleasant ‘star’ I’ve ever worked with. How do you keep a healthy work/life balance? I love to ride bicycles, but unfortunately, that does not work too well over here…so I play squash and dance to keep trim and I watch what I eat especially my rice intake. What’s your favorite weekend activity or what do you do to unwind? I love to ride horses and I do that on the beach here, but I have not done it in a while. Now that you asked, I need to get back to doing that again. I also enjoy fellowshipping with other believers on a Sunday or any given day.

The Lawrence Twins with Rapper and Producer Majic Mike at the BET Hip Hop Awards

Any other thing we should know about you? I am a dirty rag at the service of my Lord and Saviour… not even close to perfection, but the journey is easier with Him as my Guide. DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

29


All Stars

For Children Ages 6 - 12

Parent’s Section Surviving Christmas During this period with all the hustle and bustle of the festivities going on, it is necessary to have a plan in place. We will call it ‘The Christmas Survival Plan’.

Spend time talking and reacquainting yourself with your children. Use this time to find out what has been happening to them at school. Find out ‘Who their friends are, What books they are reading, What music is ‘hot’, What is not ‘cool’ or as they say now, ‘What is ‘Fresh’’ and so on.

Watch your children’s diet Watch what you all eat. Yes, the season seems to call for indulgence but not for over indulgence. For the children, obesity is slowly creeping into Nigerian families so be careful with what they eat. Encourage your children to make healthier food choices as much as possible. Help them to say no when necessary to foods offered. You might want to especially Usually with all the events going on, if not properly watch the level of their sugar intake. How many bottle handled, there is the possibility that once the holi- of soda is your child’s limit? Don’t forget to count days are over, the whole family will end up feeling the cakes, the chocolates and so on. Also for you like they are in need of a holiday. This is certainly as parents remember to watch what you eat as well. not the best way to begin a new year. Here are a few Remember you don’t want to spend the new year with tips to survive the holidays the ‘Battle of the Bulge’ The children will be on Christmas vacation at this time. There are usually lots of events - parties, weddings, family visits, religious functions and so on to attend. This can leave you with a lot to deal with. We are all glad ‘School-Runs’ are out at least for a few weeks but then a lot else comes in to play.

Prepare to Return At least a week before they go back to school, have their schedule return to the normal school time schedule. Let them go to bed early and gradually start waking them up earlier until they are back to their school session wakeup time. This will help their adjustment back to school. This way you avoid the back to school grogginess and tiredness as their bodies struggle to adjust back to school time. They resume school healthy alert and awake.

Practise what you Preach Remember the season and use this as an opportunity to Practise what you Preach. The season is about Giving, Kindness to others and Selflessness. If the opportunity arises, do let your children volunteer to help the less privileged. You could encourage them to give out some of their things. They can use some of their pocket money to assist the poor or the orphans. Discuss with them and help them realise how much they could do to help. The thought and the action are more important than the amount. Let the Do not overschedule children escort you to an orphanage if possible. Let Play Catch up Be careful not to over stretch yourself and your This could also be a good time for you to help chil- them see you give. Do not be a “kill joy”. Be careful family especially the children. You do not have to dren catch up with their school work, home work and you don’t spoil all the fun. Guide them to know your attend every function or party you are invited to. Do to deal with knotty topics. Help them with subjects or rules but don’t spoil all their fun. Have a rest plan. not hurl your children from one event to another. topics they struggled with during the term. Remem- Decide before hand how many days or hours in a day This is a surefire way to wear every one out. Be ber to deal with school work early in the holidays. As you all need to rest and keep to it. Remember to selective. soon as school closes, it is a good idea to have the give yourself a break too!! children finish up all their homework. Plan to spend time alone as a family. Happy Holidays!!!

Children’s Section

This month’s page was done with the help of some of the present members of the All Stars club. Thank you for all the help all. Here is a list of the All Stars Most Popular Gifts, Books and Movies as voted by our current All Stars members. Read it mum and dad. Top 5 All Stars Children’s Gifts 1. X Box 360 2. Nintendo DSI or 3. Nintendo Wii 4. Play Station Portable 5. Play station 3 6. Cell Phone 7. Digital Camera

8. 9. 10.

Bicycles Books Fun toys

Top 5 All Stars Children’s Books 1. Mind Maps by Tony Buzan` 2. Big Book of Girl’s stuff/Big book of boys stuff by Bart king 3. Battle field of the Mind for kids by Joyce Meyer 4. Who moved my cheese for Kids by Spencer Johnson 5. Diary of a wimpy kid 1,2,3 by Jeff Kinney

Top 10 All Stars Children’s Movies 1. Despicable Me 2. Ice Age 3. Incredibles 4. Alvin and the Chipmunks 5. G force 6. High School Musical 7. Bedtime Stories 8. Bee Movie 9. Camp Rock The Final Jam 10. The Wild Enjoy your holidays.

Tayo Olarewaju is the Director of Delightsome Land School, a nursery and primary school in Victoria Island Lagos. She studied Accounting and Educational Leadership and Management. She has been working with children for over a decade. She is passionate about children, enjoys reading and writing and chocolate biscuits. She is married with 3 stars aged between 6 and 12 years and a dog named Scratch. If you would like to be a part of the All stars team Send your name, date of birth and your phone number (or your mums or dad’s phone no) to 0708 469 9955 or ask your mum or dad to send it by email to delightsomeland@yahoo.com

30

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010


PreSchooler activities for Preschool Children from Age 2-5

VICTORIA TANDOH

More worksheets at: education.com/worksheets

Copyright © 2010-2011 by Education.com Copyright © 2010-2011 by Education.com

© Learning Horizons Inc.

More worksheets at www.education.com/worksheets More worksheets at www.education.com/worksheets

Make and Build From around the age of two, many children love building large objects out of cardboard boxes, tubes and plastic bottles. Help your child to stick, hold and tape if necessary. - A box can become a mask or helmet if you cut two holes in it - To make a castle tower, stick a box and plastic cup or flower pot onto a large box. You could cut a door for your preschooler to open and shut - Punch holes in cardboard boxes then string them together - Encourage your child to tell you about whatever he’s made

Tell Me a Story You may find your preschooler asks you to make up stories for him or her. You could try basing your stories around every day events in your toddler’s life, such as telling the story of her day. - A photograph of your toddler could provide a starting point for a story. You could say “one day Ella went to the beach,” for example - Use a favorite toy as the focus in a story. You could begin, “Teddy decided to go for a walk,” and walk the toy across your laps as you say the words - Once the story is familiar you could give your toddler the toy, so she can act out the story.

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

31


Sports Much Ado About Nothing! Kunle Michael

I

t will be erroneous to believe that the appointment of Samson Siasia as the chief coach of Nigeria’s senior national team will proffer solutions to the rapidly declining state of the Super Eagles of Nigeria. In my own opinion, I do not think Samson Siasia is better than the likes of Christian Chukwu or Shaibu Amodu in the sense that these two indigenous coaches made their marks while in charge of the Super Eagles. Christian Chukwu caged and defeated the Indomitable Lions of Cameroun who were very hard nuts to crack and were thorns in the flesh of the Super Eagles. Chukwu’s tutored Eagles defeated the Indomitable Lions enroute to clinching the bronze medal at the 2004 edition of the African Nations Cup held in Tunisia. Shiabu Amodu was given the mandate of getting the Eagles to the semi-final of the tournament, though under a lot of uncommendable performances, however, Chukwu achieved both feat but was fired at the end. While agreeing that an indigenous coach who has never handled the Eagles be given a chance if the NFF choice of coach for the Super Eagles is a local coach, but I do not think it is yet uhuru for Nigerian soccer. The problem of Nigeria’s football is not just any coach or player. Yakubu Aiyegbeni missed an incredible scoring chance against South Korea in a World Cup game at the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa and everybody was calling for his head for the miss. Yakubu was just not there in Conakry when the Eagles played against Guinea and were only fortunate not to conceive more than a goal in the defeat they suffered in the hands of the Guineans. Lars Lagerback was appointed to take the Eagles to the 2010 World Cup in South Africa, the Eagles had a disastrous outing and Lagerback wisely walked out when he noticed the herculean and overwhelming tasks of pioneering Nigeria’s football to the top level.

32

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Looking into what has gone wrong with Nigeria’s soccer; to the best of my knowledge, there are three areas we need to look into:

are numerous and convincing proofs that Dutch, Italian and Serbian coaches possess this important football coaching element.

1. Administrative Deficiencies: some of the 3. Football Policy Analysis: there is a course in people in charge of the administrative aspects of Nige- political science called ‘Public Policy Analyses’; no rian football are square pegs in round holes, they are government or private organization thrives without apeither appointed by zoning or the ‘man knows man’ connections. Some jostle for these highSamson Siasia ly delicate positions in order to make money and for their own selfish purposes. As a result, they have never come up with impressive blue prints to achieve commendable feats that will cheer soccer loving Nigerians. The right people should be given the opportunities. People of character, integrity and passion for the round leather game. People who have sound administrative knowledge with previous achievements in football administration or other relevant fields should mount the administrative aspects of our football. If this is done, it could be the beginning of good tidings for Nigeria’s football. 2. Psychological Deficiencies: our dear Super Eagles are affected by the underachievers’ tag labeled on them in recent times due to their drop in value and quality on the continental and global level. During the 2004/2005 season in the English premiership, our dear Yakubu Aiyegbeni lacked confidence in front of a goal while playing for Portsmouth. He had good positioning but was finding it difficult to score goals and as a result, the club hired a sound psychologist who worked with him personally and after a short period of time, Yakubu became one of the hottest strikers in England. Jose Mourinho, another genius in the round leather game boasts of a PhD in Psychology. His immense psychological approach towards the game of football is highly instrumental to his huge success as a football tactician. We need a coach with sound psychological instincts, who could psyche our dear Super Eagles up indefatigably and restore the lost confidence back and there

propriating it. It is the aim and objective of any organization, how to achieve such, the duration, logistics, needed materials, benefits to their customers/consumers, public and the organization itself. We need a proper football policy analysis to move our football to the level of our dreams. If this is carefully and effectively embarked on and appropriately implemented, it will certainly contribute in huge measure to the resuscitation of the Super Eagles and Nigerian football in general and this is the job of the NFF (Nigerian Football Association). Without revisiting and redefining these critical and important aspects of our soccer, appointment of coaches may just turn out to be much ado about nothing!


Sports

Samson Siasia… Tolu Ifekoya

A

few months ago in an interview with goal.com Samson Siasia expressed his misgivings about the present Nigerian Football Federation Board “I am not happy and I want changes. The way the NFF elections were held a while ago wasn’t proper and we should organize the state-run football bodies very well even before the federal level. That’s the problem we have in Nigeria. People want to start always at the top. Go back to base, the foundation and build from down up and not from up down”

it will take him and his new technical crew at least three years to give the nation a formidable team that can hold its own against any senior team in the world. He also has solicited from the NFF all necessary support the coaching team needs to achieve its goals and it seems he has their ears as the FA have given him the option of choosing his assistants. Also Siasia’s contract which is the best ever given to a Nigerian coach, states that he would earn N5,000,000 a month with a 20% upward review on his salary in the

Today, misgivings or not, the present board of the Nigerian FA has fulfilled one of Siasia’s lifelong dreams which is, to coach the Super Eagles of Nigeria. In November 2010 after interviews were held with Stephen Keshi and Samson Siasia by the technical committee of the NFF, the latter was declared the preferred choice and given a four year contract to that effect. Samson Siasia might have netted his dream job but it is one he must handle with the gloves of an experienced goalkeeper as his workload is not enviable. His first task is to qualify the Eagles for the 2012 African Nations Cup finals which is to be co-hosted by Gabon and Equatorial Guinea. Presently the qualification chance of the team is unpredictable as they lie in second place behind Guinea in Group B after two rounds of matches. It is pertinent to note that only the winner of the group, which also has Madagascar and Ethiopia, after the round robin phase qualifies automatically for the 2012 African football fiesta. The next challenge is to get to the finals of the Nations Cup and this can only be achieved if he has built a good team, another task of his and finally to qualify the nation for the 2014 World Cup. It seems Siasia who is a former Super Eagles player has a good grasp of what is expected of him as he has promised to change the team’s tactics to make them play better, “the manner of team you will see on the field of play would be offensive minded, playing free flowing football. There will be a difference.” Though he is ready to face his task headlong as is his usual style but he has allayed the fears of some current members of the Eagles team when he stated that he will not be carrying out a drastic overhaul of the team, “during my interview with the NFF technical committee I told them that we have to look at the areas where we have to inject new players, we don’t want to say we are going to ask all the old players to leave. But we have to look at the areas we think we have to inject new players.” In talking tough, Siaone as he’s fondly referred to says

cisions and finally but not conclusive the art of reposing the needed confidence in his players. His success so far as a coach have been consistent as he won silver medal at the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games and the U-20 side under his tutelage were runners up to Argentina at the 2005 World Youth Championships having earlier emerged African champions in the same year. His knack for identifying raw young talents is spot on as he scouts for the best and develops them to become international stars. Earlier in his coaching career, Siasia effectively managed the U-10, U-11, U-12 Classic l and U-17 boys’ team by taking them to regional ranking and winning State honours in USA. As a player, he is a product of the 1985 team that won bronze at the U-20 World cup in former Soviet Union. That team also clinched the 1994 African Nations cup and went on to claim world recognition at USA ’94. After the World Cup FIFA ranked Nigeria fifth in the world, the highest the country has attained to date. As a forward, he scored 13 goals for Nigeria in 46 appearances and was ranked the third leading scorer of the team. His playing career which spanned from 1982 to 2000 saw him play for the likes of Julius Berger of Lagos, El Kanemi Warriors, Al Hilah of Egypt and Nantes club of France where he won the French Championat of the 1994/95 season with the team.

Samson Siasia

third and fourth year. He would also receive twice of what the players receive as match bonus and allowance. A fully furnished apartment will be provided paid for by the NFF for Siaisia and his assistant in Abuja, he is entitled to fly business class within and outside Nigeria and would be given an official car and a driver. With the physical and monetary support given by the FA and immense believe in Siasia’s ability by Nigerians, the question then is, will Samson Siasia be a success with the Super Eagles? The name Samson Siasia is respected in football as belonging to man that can achieve great success with any team he handles. This is based on his good players’ selection, ability to understand the dynamics of an unfolding match, making technically sound and game changing de-

Nigerians in Diaspora have placed all their hope in Siaisia, who was born on August 14 1967 in Lagos and attended the famous St. Finbarrs College, to create a team they can be proud to support. In the four years at the helms of affair of the Super Eagles, Siaisia is expected to instill discipline in the team, inculcate team spirit and commitment amongst the players, ensure only fit players, mentally and physically, dorn the Nigerian jersey and optimally be transparent in his team selection process. Come 2014, Samson Siasia’s performance would be tried, weighed and judged against these words of his: “people feel I am comprehensive and have a good and down to earth relationship with Nigerian footballers. But personally, I feel I can do the job. I am interested. I have worked hard enough to prove that I can bring some changes to the senior team. The records show it. Look at how we struggled from the scratch to the finals of the 2005 U-20 FIFA World Cup and to the finals of the Beijing Olympics, amidst a lot of difficulties. I don’t know why some people won’t just appreciate. Our works speak for themselves.” Like the French, I say to Samson Siasia tous les meilleurs.

Creche Playgroup Nursery Grade School After School Care Mobile Creches Consultancy Training & Workshops

from home y a w a e m o ... H

...excellence through Christ 26, Mabinuori Dawodu, Gbagada Phase 1, Lagos Telephone: 01-8934834, 01-8113816, 08033117630

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

33


Dabar

Insights for Christian Living

Are all Christians “saints” or only some ‘super Believers’? Adeleke Adeyemi

our to the martyrs. For many centuries afterwards the title of saint was bestowed by popular acclamation – both instances arising from theological illiteracy that continues unabated, perpetuated by a certain section of the Church. According to Scripture, all Believers are reckoned ‘saints’, in nearly one hundred references scattered throughout Holy Writ. Although its proponents maintain that canonisation does not make someone a saint; it is only a declaration that the person is a saint and was a saint even before canonisation, the posthumous recognition is a bogus one and constitutes at best a red herring as it distracts rather heavily from the “simplicity of the Gospel.” That something has persisted as a cultural practice does not confer on it validity in any way whatsoever, as must be clear to all.

T

he Encarta defines canonisation as “making into a saint”; but also as “idolisation” – and that is where the problem lies with this uniquely Roman Catholic practice that’s been roundly thumbed down through the ages by Christians – like Martin Luther, ex-Roman Catholic and a notable theologian in Christian history responsible for initiating the Protestant Reformation – from their Sola Scriptura (‘Scriptures only’) basis for faith and practice. The modern custom of canonization originated in the early Christian practice of paying public hon-

The recent announcement by the Vatican, the seat of power of the Roman Catholic establishment, in Rome, pronouncing the first Australian “saint” makes urgent the restatement of historic Christianity’s uncomplicated stance on the matter. There have been and still are countless saints – Believers in Jesus Christ – ‘Down Under’ as “in every tribe and every nation under Heaven”! The recent development may even be mere tokenism: the Roman Catholic establishment would doubtless by this expect to be seen to be intrinsically committed ‘from the inside out’ to fighting the rot

within its own system of priesthood – another unbiblical practice, a “vain conversation [manner of life] received by tradition from [their] fathers” (1 Peter 1:18; see also 1 Timothy 4:3) – by acknowledging an activist in that regard from its own history, to keep critics at bay. In her lifetime, Mary MacKillop struggled with the Roman Catholic establishment; she was once briefly excommunicated. She was also instrumental in exposing sexual abuse by an Irish Catholic priest. She was one of six Catholic figures canonized by Pope Benedict XVI recently in Rome. MacKillop’s tomb, a short distance from Sydney’s famous harbour, is now bound to become a Mecca to thousands of adoring, nay, idolising Catholics and others. In Melbourne, where she was born, even Australia’s atheist Prime Minister Julia Gillard joined celebrations commemorating her life. A special cross made from timber taken from MacKillop’s original school has toured Australia over the past two months in preparation for her canonisation – a clearly unbiblical act promoting gross sins like necromancy, hagiography and utter idolatry. The future for “the Church of the living God, the ground and pillar of truth,” is to go back to “earnestly [contending] for the faith which was once delivered unto the saints.” In an age that has seen the ramparts of faith all but gone to seed, with its disdain for and denial of historic truth, it is safe only to stand on Scripture, with clear affirmations like the definition at 1 Corinthians 6: “Do ye not know that the saints [that is, Believers in Christ – like the original addresses of the present epistle: the corrupt Corinthian church] shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters?”

Dabar - Insights for Christian Living The Dabar column is about Christian living. This column is going to deal with real life issues that Christians face in day to day living and the Biblical perspective on these issues with a real life approach to such situations. We will also use this column as a forum to discuss issues affecting Christianity as a whole. As such, letters with issues which can be discussed should be sent to timelesscourage@yahoo.co.uk. Issues to be discussed in the column will be chosen from letters sent in by you our readers. We look forward to hearing from you so we can start treating these issues from next month. Thank you. 34

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010


2011 and Nigeria’s Leadership Challenge

Viewpoint

James Asu

D

uring Ghana’s Golden Jubilee Celebration the Ex-President, John Kufour in his speech addressed and buttressed the need to engage the youths in leadership positions. In his words “I make a plea to the youths of Ghana and Africa. Your continent and masses need your energy, your dynamism, your creativity and above all your dreams for the development of its continent states. So I urge you, our young people, to resolve to stay home, using your energy and your enthusiasm to serve Africa. You’ll find that what we achieve together would be far more fulfilling and satisfying than anything you can do elsewhere in the world. Indeed, this continent now provides a quicker avenue to success financially and emotionally than anywhere else. The future of this continent is yours. It is your heritage and you must stay and be part of building a well-governed, economically vibrant nation, which we all aspire to.” My spirit was elated with greater confidence and courage after meditating on this inspiring quote of note, hoping and praying that the Giant of Africa, my country will conquer her many challenges and crises by giving the youths the baton to participate fully and actively in leadership positions.

say the truth, there are so many youths in this nation who are not only available but also capable and desirous of stepping into the seats of leadership, but due to the “Politricks” that is practiced here in Nigeria, many of them don’t want to participate, waiting for a time when true politics will be practiced, which will enhance credible elections into every leadership position. I believe that come 2011, our votes as a people of integrity, discipline and dignity will count provided we all speak with one voice that “ one man (or woman), one vote and no to election rigging”

But I saw it as a spat on the face the statement of a Nigerian ex-head of State. He was quoted as saying that “Because we have seen signs that they are not capable of leading the country and so we feel we should help them. Maybe they are not given the proper education that is why a country like Nigeria cannot be ruled by people without experience. People like Obama have the experience. He started from the state House of Assembly to the House of Representatives and to the Senate. If our youths are like this, we will say they have the requisite experience. But we have not reached that level. Honestly, it is our wish that God will bring the younger people that will take over from us if they are available.” It’s saddening and heart-rending that since independence, this nation has been ruled by leaders who did not secure the votes of the masses. And how long will it take Nigeria to develop her youths and give them the experience and knowledge needed to step into leadership positions. Nigeria needs to give her youths the privilege and opportunity to add their own quota towards the development of this great country by giving them the necessary support at every point or period. Many African leaders in their manifestoes usually cite Obama as a case study of a successful young leader who emerged to become the 44th president of the United States of America. But a larger percentage of them only make flimsy promises without fulfilling any all through their tenure in office. They do not display or show any readiness or willingness towards helping the youths to gain more courage, expertise and experience so as to lead effectively and successfully when they get voted into power and leadership positions in the nation. To

Our nation has undergone different stages, ever since we became a federation. We have tasted the good side of various happenings like advancement of religious belief, sensitization and sanitization of the banking sector, growing telecommunication industries and rebranding of our reputation in other nations. We have also experienced the bad side like epileptic power supply, bad roads and insufficient infrastructure, scarcity of petroleum products, and lastly the ugly side like endemic corruption and misappropriation of funds, misallocation of contracts and projects in the high places of power, national failure in international football competitions, upsurge of militants and high rates of kidnappers in some regions in the nation, incessant strikes in the labour and educational sectors, deep seated unemployment among graduates and school leavers, armed robbery and money laundering in private and public

sectors, suppression of human rights through election rigging, underpayment of teachers and lecturers compared to their foreign counterparts, inadequate modern facilities and structures for experiments and research in most of the tertiary institutions, and insufficient space for admission seekers. All the above prevailing menace in the nation should prompt us back to our Supreme Maker, as a matter of urgency for his mercy and forgiveness upon us, for our waywardness. As in the words of Chinua Achebe “Nigeria is a child, who is gifted, talented and endowed but wayward.” We need a new breed of leaders who are void of greed. Greed is what has caused our backwardness and waywardness instead of progress as a nation. For how long will the masses suffer under the infliction of self-imposed leaders who rule them without giving them any dividend of democracy? Many of them have forgotten that they carry the hopes of so many people whom they lead or serve, that a renewal of optimism and change is necessary at every moment. But this nation’s future rests on a spiritual renewal found only in the pages of God’s word which is a sure guide towards the transformation of this nation and securing a new Nigeria of our dream. It is a pity that many of the masses have been pushed to the wall as a result of injustice and the failure of leaders in fulfilling their mandates. No wonder, we have an upsurge of protesters and militants whose watch word is similar to that of Dr. Martin Luther, King, Jr. saying “we refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so we have come to cash this check- a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice. He goes further that “forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.” What a great strategy adopted and practiced by Dr. King during his lifetime. Many activists have come and gone, they fought tirelessly and zealously towards restoring the lost glory of this land but most of the time, if not all the time, we repay them with great suffering and punishment before sending them to early and untimely deaths. Though the journey has been rough and tough and the pains too excruciating to be easily forgotten, no thanks to military dictatorship and senseless civilian leadership, I am sure that in all these we are more than conquerors only if we all demand that our votes count in 2011 and beyond. Only then can we say boldly that we are “Good People, Great Nation.” www.infojames4impact.blogspot.com; 4impact@yahoo.com

DECEMBER 2010

infojames-

TIMELESS

35


Podium

Nigeria:

Building a New Nation of Our Dreams By George Ashiru

W

hat Is Nationhood A “nation‟ “is a body of people occupying a given area whose common interests are strong enough to make possible the maintenance of a single sovereign civil authority, i.e. a state which may and often does predate the nation as a historical reality” (Harmati. 1983.) ‘Nation-building’ is defined as “the process of reinforcing the common bonds among the people of a nation state to the end that there may be general stability and prosperity so that the nation may participate usefully in the community of nations” The foundational materials used in building a nation are not bricks and mortars, i.e. not a strong treasury, nor a strong army nor an inexhaustible and formidable arsenal, though they may seem important. To be a nation, any community or society may require political unity or territorial integrity, one executive, one constitution, a common law, a means of viable transportation and easy communication. A nation is built, besides other factors, by common civil values, common symbols, common sense of progress, common participation in decisions, equality before the law, mutual respect for others and tolerance, and a feeling of freedom. “National development does not consist merely in economic progress but means increasing possibility for all of

36

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

living a fully human life on the physical (material), cultural, spiritual levels. It also implies the growing ability of a nation as whole to take its rightful place in the international field, economically, politically, culturally, i.e., to function with a proper degree of autonomy and prestige “-Cardinal Gracias, 1967. From the biblical perspective, the foundation of God‟s throne, the Bible says, is righteousness and justice (Psalm 89:14) and a kingdom (“nation‟) is built on righteousness or destroyed by its absence (Proverbs 11:11). It is law and justice that keep a nation steady and strong (Proverbs 29:4). A nation is a good and welfare state when it is built on the principles of honesty, morality, justice and fairness (Proverbs 29:12, 14; 31:2-5). Righteousness, morality, justice etc provide the foundation for a just and welfare nation. Its pillars are principles of human dignity and freedom, truth and knowledge, personal responsibility and stewardship, and the rule of law. The big question is this? Do we have a “nation”? Or are we a confederation of nations? Are these confederates looking in the same direction? Do we worship the same God and have similar beliefs? Are we culturally, morally homogeneous? Have we freely joined together in a “matrimony of common development” or in an “unholy

matrimony of convenience”? Nigeria Pre-1960 Politically there was no unity. Hundreds of kingdoms existed side by side with no sense of unity or any serious sense of interdependence. These were ruled by the traditional institutions under the guidance of the priestly caste while the common people had no say whatsoever in administrative matters. A fragmented, splintered, competitive and fighting political scenario prevailed; loyalty was to the kings. Any idea of a devotion to the land in general was inexistent. At the social level the feudalism and caste order was in complete command of the situation. Being a discriminatory system it could not see equality of humans. Finality belonged to the social order of wealth. The low status and illiteracy of women wasted half of the total human resources. Education was the monopoly of the royalty and the wealthy; and they were all male in gender. Female infanticide was widely common. Killing of twins, human sacrifices, child marriage, enforced widowhood etc were normal in those days. Infant mortality rate was high, resulting in creating a multitude of young widows. High birth rate was the only answer to the high infant mortality rate and the curse of short life span. Another heavy pressure upon the women! Religion was communal and the traditional gods and their priests


Podium reigned supreme. There was no choice, democratic or otherwise in worship, and everyone adhered to the final authority no matter how unjust, of the king and priests. Freedom of individual conscience and free and open dissemination of knowledge were neither entertained nor encouraged. The North was predominantly Islamic, and the governance was through the Emirates, guided strictly by the Koran and the commentaries and guides, Sunnahand Hadith. These published guides made governance straight forward and easy for the Sheiks and Emirs, and it was easy for the British to rule through this institution. In the South West, things were a little more treacherous, with kings and communities constantly at war, expanding territory and several romancing with the colonial powers to destabilise other kingdoms to get political leverage with the whites. Slavery was a trade which the kings of the South West of Nigeria delighted in engaging in. The value placed on human life of the poor was nil, explaining human sacrifices. The religions were quite secretive and adherents and followers assumed mystical powers, which kept the citizens in fear and bondage. Unlike Islam, and Christianity, the traditional religions did not have manuals for reference…the populace only got involved through general festivals, and for private divinations. The South East, with the embedded minority groups did not fare better with struggles, land wars and cross border raids, etc. The religious practices were also absolutes and involved much bloodshed. These foundations did not portend much for a future republic…and colonial fiat, subterfuge and structural deficiencies made that all the more certain. Colonialism’s Positive Effect Colonialism arrived with a three-pronged approach.Trade, Governance, and Religion. For the sake of our subject matter, which centres on private initiatives for nation building, I will put emphasis on the effect of the value system of the colonialists’ religion in helping to abrogate the embedded strongholds in Nigerian communities in the Southern parts of Nigeria, whose effect is now a major advantage to their citizenry. The colonial missionaries in pre-independent Nigeria, under the protection of the British forces and government sponsorship laboured for a philosophical, moral and cultural regeneration of the worldview prevalent in the Nigerian landmass and it is this commitment on the part of these missionaries, that helped the building up of religious freedoms, abrogation of terrible native traditions and creating a new value system constitutionally committed to the principles of secularism, individual freedom of conscience, equality of all humans and genders, and constitutional parliamentary democracy. How it was introduced, and whether it was wholly accepted by the peoples of the South of Nigeria, and how it is being practiced…that’s another story. Education was the most effective method of bringing the desired change. Churches and schools existed side by sided. In the length and breadth of Nigeria, missionaries took the initiative and founded schools and other educational institutions and through the newly educated generations brought about radical changes in the value system and worldviews affecting modern Nigeria at the embryonic stage. Post Independence, More of the same - The Experience of the last 50 years 1. Lack of a sound development agenda or plans to be implemented by national leaders. 2. Lack of a visionary leadership in national government. 3. Lack of exposures/experience on the part of national leaders

4. The refusal or unwillingness of incoming leadership to accept and implement development agenda/plans of the outgoing ones 5. High class corruption, power, greed, selfishness on the part of national leaders 6. The refusal and or failure of the national leadership to make local leadership part of decision-making with regards to crafting a development agenda 7. Injustice and bad governance Why? 1. A return to feudalism 2. A return to caste, class and discriminatory orders. 3. A perpetuation of hypocrisy, hybrid of values. Sir Abubarka Tafawa Balewa & Sir James Robertson Independence Day Celebration, 1960 4. An ‘Animal Farm” ideology. 5. Extreme individualism 6. Inordinate unquenched thirst for conlenges for the leader with integrity. trol over others 7. “Decorative Democracy”, not fundamental to our cul- 12. The development of a nation is intrinsically related to the intellectual development of its members. Knowledge tural norms. and intellectual development cannot be monopolized by Fast Tracking to the Future – Your Roles as “National a few and the rest denied its privileges. The duty of the leader is to find ways to improve the knowledge base of Saviours” 1. If we are to serve as role models in the society, the the citizenry, through discourse such as the one we are leader with integrity should consider an active plan for partaking now. general mediation, reconciliation and unification within 13. The leader must ensure the principle of human the various communities in Nigeria, for the house divid- worth and freedom. There must be an atmosphere of freedom for individual members to develop themselves ed against itself can never stand. 2. The leader with integrity should strongly engage the as individual persons using all their talents and gifts and state to the extent that they will begin encouraging and the resources available. Pre-eminence cannot be given to counselling their membership to take up assignment in any social or political order or set up that make individuhigh government offices and begin to apply good gover- als serve the system. If that happens then the individuals nance within every sector of the national society in line are enslaved to an oppressive system in operation. 14. In a democratic period, the leader has an imperative with transformational values. 3. The leader with integrity needs to seriously promote to drive voter education, to drive voter registration and positive national identity policy by encouraging Nigerians ensure the sanctity of votes. 15. Clear vision, ability to think, discuss, debate and to appreciate their values and culture. 4. The leader with integrity should constructively engage articulate convincingly and persuasively, right decisionand encourage government to harness the limited finan- making process, the power to execute them; these the cial resources for vital areas such as a health care delivery political process provides. When leaders stay away from this crucial area of life, besides betraying our lack of system, quality education, agriculture etc. 5. The leader with integrity should seek to support the wholesome commitment to the totality of life, we deny enforcement of the rule of law. Despotism or dictator- ourselves the privilege to decisively participate in the ship rests on the will and power of mortals, who always mission of nation-building. This is wilful abdication of are a minority but a serious threat to the majority, and it responsibility, and is criminal. is the moral right of the leader to challenge this anomaly 6. The leader with integrity should initiate a dialog at the national and local levels aimed at involving national policy that will clearly spell out the hope and aspiration of the Liberian people for national unity, peace and progress. 7. The leader with integrity should intentionally find and mentor emerging leaders, building their capacity and get them involved in community and national development projects within their respective localities and beyond. 8. The leader with integrity should preach messages of peace and tolerance irrespective of political differences, religion, tribal back ground, etc. 9. The leader with integrity should be very proactive in peace-building and reconciliation programs in every community across the country. 10. The leader with integrity should now redefine his / her educational, health, agriculture, etc capacity building role and begin to work towards achieving the MDGs within their spheres of influence. 11. The resources available in any community, material, mineral and personnel have to be harnessed and put into maximum use with efficiency so that community may progress in the economic front. That is one of the chal-

Finally… Quoting from C. V. Mathew “We need a fresh vision for our nation in the 21st century—a nation that is made of individuals, families, communities and a mosaic of races, language groups, religious traditions and cultures; a vision born out of the Biblical worldview, a vision that honours Jesus Christ the Lord of the nations and history, a vision that seeks the wellbeing of our fellow citizens in a healthy environment and the fulfilment of our national aspirations in healthy fellowship with one another (i.e. communal harmony); a vision that promotes a genuinely national consciousness, and social and national integration. It must be a vision that realizes truth, righteousness, justice, freedom, equality, mercy and love.” Rev. George Ashiru, the Convener, Town Hall Meetings Project (THMP)] and President of the Institute for Transformational Leadership delivered this paper at the Leader Values Conference, held in Lagos on Saturday October 16 2010 with the theme, The Emergence of National Saviours (Leaders with Integrity).

DECEMBER 2010

TIMELESS

37


Random Musings with Ayodeji Jeremiah

Sign up to be a ‘Gimper’

The following is an article I like sharing at every year end. This month is one of the most beautiful months of the year. For one it is the month we celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is the last month of the year and therefore presents an opportunity for stock taking. Amidst all the celebration and holidays and weddings (yes, many weddings hold at this time of the year), we need to step back and assess our lives in the year just ending and prepare for the new year coming ahead. There will never be another 2010. There have been births, deaths, wars, famines, earthquakes, fires, festivals, celebrations, birthdays and all of those things that mankind goes through from year to year. We are now going into the second year of this decade and the eleventh year of this millennium. A little over one hundred years ago (1903), there was no airplane as the Wright brothers had not yet put their acts together. There was no TV. There was no computer. There was no United Nations or Commonwealth. There was no First World War not to talk of a Second World War. There was no atomic bomb. I could go on and on. But in the course of the past one hundred and seven years since 1903, a lot of things have changed and happened, most of which have been through the acts and efforts of men and women who have worked very hard at the expense of their lives and comfort to make a difference in their homes, families, communities and countries. Of course, we are talking about positive things here. Some of such people are well known and some we may even never hear of in the course of our daily lives. People who hate mediocrity and would rather prefer to be ‘gimpers’. Let us forget about our problems for a while. I just received a monthly economic newsletter that says unemployment in Nigeria is at an all time high of 20%. 38

TIMELESS

DECEMBER 2010

Our economy is in a comatose despite whatever Lamido Sanusi might want to tell us. Inflation is at 14%, naira exchange rate to the dollar has refused to come down from one hundred and fifty naira to a dollar, the manufacturing sector currently accounts for less than 5% of GDP, bank lending rates of between twenty and thirty percent, and one can go on and on. Our refineries have refused to work. The Niger-Delta is in a restive calm and has what you might call the peace of the graveyard. You can never know when the next mine or set of kidnappings will go off. We are the eight largest oil-producing nation in the world and yet the citizens cannot feel the impact of that accolade. Let us forget about the war in Afghanistan and Islamist terrorists in Somalia. Let us forget about the bombs that went off on October 1 during our independence. Let us forget about our politicians and the upcoming elections and those looting the treasury. Let us forget about hunger, poverty, diseases, wars and other problems confronting mankind. Let us instead talk about making a difference in our individual lives. A difference that will impact positively on those around us. As an individual, what have you achieved this year? As part of an organisation, what has that organisation achieved? What were the successes and what were the failures? Have you been able to identify those? Has it been just another year? In what ways have you contributed to the advancement of your home, family, friends, organisation and even country? What problems have you been able to solve? What objectives were you able to achieve? In life generally, progress and fulfilment is based only on factors such as having a spouse, having good kids, having a nice home, having a well paid job, a good car and all those other things that make life worthwhile. All these things are good and are important but are these the only way of measuring your life’s worth and successes. You have been in the same job for three years, doing the same thing, living in the same way day in and day out. Meanwhile you don’t really like that job. The only reason you are doing it is because of the money. You don’t have a passion for what you are doing. You cannot state exactly what your life vision is. Where are you going? Where do you want to be in the next one, five or ten years? How valuable are you really to your family, your organisation, your friends, and your place of worship? Kenneth Hagin has gone to be with the Lord since September 2004 but we will continue to remember him for a very long time. Rhema Bible Church and Institute and Kenneth Hagin Ministries and two generations of Pastor sons will ensure that. Pa Akindayomi of the R.C.C.G. fame has been gone for thirty years now but we can’t help mention his name when we talk about the Re-

deemed Christian Church of God. Nelson Mandela celebrated his ninetieth birthday last year July and world celebrities and world leaders flew to South Africa to honour him in a media-raving event. When David Rockefeller celebrated his eightieth birthday in August 2004, it was the president of a nation that delivered a personal hand-written card from a former U.S. president. Alfred Nobel has been dead for over a century but every year from October the world is reminded of his memory through his Nobel Prizes. Those mentioned above are just a few of the well known ones. There are several others who are making maximum impact all over the world in their various fields of endeavour, in their homes, families, organisations, cities and countries. You too can do something that you will be remembered for in your local community, your organisation, and your nation. It does not have to be something gigantic but it must be something selfless and life changing. Something that stands you out from the pack. However, all of these start from some very little things in everyday life. Things such as giving a part of yourself, a part of your time, a part of your money and generally being a ‘gimper’. A ‘gimper’ according to a seminary chaplain and author, Dr. Richard Seume is someone who always does a little more than what is required or expected of him or her. There is no better time to sign up to be a ‘gimper’ than this festive season of giving, receiving and rejoicing. As we enter into a New Year, I leave you with the following remarkable words from a great man of God. Merry Christmas and a Prosperous New Year. “At creation, certain things were deposited inside you to make you a success on the planet earth. There is something inside that is able to answer the questions of life. There is a treasure in your nature that is able to terminate all your pressures in life. Until you know it, your struggle continues. This treasure is what I call talent.” – Dr. David Oyedepo


6,000,000

5,000,000

4,000,000

3,000,000

2,000,000

1,000,000

2005

Claims Incurred Claims Paid Dividend Declared

2005 N'000 938,478 1,092,844 105,000

2006

2006 N'000 1,768,748 1,691,693 600,000

2007

2007 N'000 3,137,645 2,671,670 500,000

2008

2008 N'000 4,292,841 3,647,824 600,000

2009

2009 N'000 3,719,839 5,317,555 400,000

...is in the claims we pay! Our shareholders recognize the value of our promise to our customers, which is why, within the last five years, we have realized the value of our contracts by paying over N14 billion in claims. You don’t need to work the mathematics to know that we take the pains to satisfy you. After all, you and your business, whether corporate or personal, are the reasons we are in business.

121/123, Funso Williams Avenue, Iponri G.P.O Box 6437, Marina, Lagos. Tel: (01) 2700700 Fax: (01) 2700800 E-mail: insure@leadway.com

NN 28/29 Constitution Road, P.O. Box 458 Kaduna. Tel: (062) 870124, 875043, 875057 Website: www.leadway.com


Getting kids excited about reading is important for their future.

Helping a child learn to read, is a gift that will last a lifetime. Reading serves as the major foundational skill for all school-based learning. Only 5% of children learn to read effortlessly. 20% - 30% of children learn to read relatively easily once exposed to formal instruction. 60% of children face a more formidable challenge. We provide phonics, reading, writing, speaking and vocabulary related programmes and activities for children ages 4-9.

(234) 7070210116, (234) 8034559663, (234) 8023194296 soganigeria@yahoo.com


Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.