COVER STORY

Especially in the most uncertain of times.

It’s okay to be unsure, experience anxiety or depression, feel isolated, not know what to expect, or not know what to do next. It is certainly okay to feel uninspired. It’s also okay to ask for help.

Talisa Haskins, a Registered Psychotherapist based in Flesherton, said the unprecedented version of life everyone on the planet is experiencing makes mental health and wellness more important than ever before.

“If there’s one thing that’s certain, it’s that things are uncertain,” she said.

Whether it’s directly related to the pandemic, like the loss of a loved one or the loss of health, or a peripheral stressor like employment uncertainty, financial concerns, or social struggles, the impacts are widespread and very real.

“Yes, you will always have it better than someone else,” Haskins said. “But that doesn’t mean what you’re feeling isn’t hard. That doesn’t minimize your grief or your experience. It’s your truth.”

Haskins has been providing counselling and therapy sessions for clients online, remotely, and from her front patio - lockdown permitting - since COVID-19 began.

“My job is to validate and hold space for someone to share.”

Just like any form of health, Haskins said mental health is a scale that slides from well to unwell. There does not necessarily have to be a problem to want a “checkup” and “check-in” with someone who can listen freely and comfortably to what you’re feeling and provide a safe place to talk about it.

“Therapy isn’t just for when you’re sick,” Haskins said. “Healthy body, healthy mind. It’s all a package. There are many aspects to being well.” Even if it’s not entirely broken, it may not be entirely right. Haskins said it’s okay, even encouraged, to check in with one’s mental health before it spirals towards unwellness.

“You may not feel hopeless or completely isolated, but the lack of motivation to move forward (exists),” she said. “Where are we going?”

“Languishing” in “a state of dormancy; waiting to take (the next steps), waiting to wake up,” is very real. So many of us are waiting to return to some version of a “normal” life.

“But when is that coming?”

“We’ve moved through stages,” Haskins said. “In the beginning, there were lots of unknowns, lots of stress and fear. What is COVID? What is this illness? Am I going to get it? Is my family safe? No masks? Masks? Wash your hands? Distance? There are so many changes, just thrown at you. We as human beings cannot sustain that traumatic response in our brains.

“When someone experiences something traumatic, the natural response is fight or flight or freeze. Our brains are wired to experience that in some kind of adrenaline rush, then get back to normal. That fades away, and we process that and move forward. It’s part of our nervous system’s natural response.”

The brain is not designed to sustain the ongoing uncertainty humans have been living in for the past 18 months.

“We’re kind of numb to what’s going on, out of a state of coping,” Haskins said. “We can’t take this in anymore. It’s just too much.”

The solution?

“There isn’t a magic wand, and there’s no magic pill,” Haskins said. “Sometimes it’s just accepting it.”

Talking about it helps, too.

“That’s why I am here,” Haskins said. “I want to find the people who can’t find me.”

Given the nature of the COVID-19 pandemic, it’s impossible to not feel its reach at some level. Like everyone else, Haskins’ version of reality radically changed with the onset of the pandemic.

“COVID changed everything for me,” she said.

A former flight attendant, accustomed to travelling the world, Haskins said being home full-time has totally transformed her life, much the way it’s done for so many people.

“I am impacted by what’s going on too,” Haskins said. When a new announcement is made, or a new order is enforced, Haskins said she feels it just as much as her clients.

“Part of being a good therapist is being relatable,” she said. Photo: Jenny Jelen

Four Hugs

Haskins said research has proven that humans need at least four hugs a day.

“To be around other humans is crucial,” Haskins said. “They say you need an average of four hugs a day. To go from bumping shoulders with somebody in an elevator to absolutely nothing… how detrimental is that to be cut off from all connection?”

Finding connection with other humans, even if not physical, is so very important.

If you’re interested in reaching out for mental health support, whether it’s COVIDrelated or not, Haskins would love to speak with you. Visit talisahaskins.com to learn more about her services or to schedule an appointment. Haskins can also be reached by phone at (519) 800-5602 or by email at talisa@talisahaskins.com.

Registered Psychotherapist Flesherton (519) 800-5602 talisa@talisahaskins.com

When she’s feeling the weight of the global state, Haskins said she turns to hobbies like yoga, meditating, kayaking, and playing with her dog.

“What makes you happy? What makes you feel good?”

Whatever that is, do it.

“There is no such thing as compassion fatigue,” she said. “We, as humans, are born with compassion. You can never be tired of giving compassion. It’s innate. When you start to feel that compassion fatigue, what you’re actually experiencing is a lack of compassion towards yourself. You’re working too hard, you’re giving too much, or you’re holding onto what’s been giving to you, and not letting go.

What is your coping mechanism when times get tough (like this whole last year processing pandemic stress)?

Honestly, sometimes mine is deep in a box of caramel chocolate chip cookies or a whole loaf of rosemary sea salt from Brilliant Bread. An impromptu dance session to shake it all out or curling up to cuddle the kids and the kitten are soothing ways to slow the stress.

These are some of the ingredients in my self care recipe for peace in mind. This recipe has a true star, though. The main ingredient for mental peace that is a surefire step towards clarity and calm - a walk in the woods.

It is a win every time. This simple act can do so much to shift our moods that we may not realize there are actual chemical activities caused in the brain by being close to trees. Yes, not only does a walk in the woods seem to do good things, science is backing this up with evidence it actually is soul food to go for a cruise under the leaf canopy.

Nature offers what some researchers have called “psychological ecosystem services”. From better sleep and stress management to clearer thinking and an increased sense of wellbeing and personal happiness, a walk in the woods can do the body and brain a whole lot of good.

Yoshifumi Miyazaki is a Japanese researcher who has conducted studies to measure the benefits of nature exposure. His research included testing at 28 different forest sites and looked into the benefits of phytoncides, the volatile organic compounds trees and plants emit to protect themselves from bacteria, fungi, and insects. His research shows a direct increase in immune function after exposure to forested areas and these compounds. There is a breadth of research showing scientific results and support that a walk in the woods, and even living nearer to urban trees, reduces cortisol levels, boosts cancer fighting cells, lowers blood pressure, and increases emotional resilience.

With all of the science out there backing up that sense of calm we know we feel after getting outside, there is little room left to hum and haw over whether or not to go for a walk today. So, the next time you are having a challenge processing the weight of human existence or feel that stress level rising inside, put on your hikers and get the heck outside. It’s good for you.

If you have an idea to create a trail or special area to explore and enjoy your land and forest bathe, DB Trailblazers specializes in bringing your backcountry property dreams into reality. DB TRAILBLAZERS info@dbtrailblazers.ca www.dbtrailblazers.ca @dbtrailblazers 519.477.4474

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