Family

Magda Herzberger, a 93-year-old survivor of the Auschwitz concentration camp, told a group of students at Grand Canyon University that, “it’s possible to survive unbelievable tragedies in the face of dire circumstances.” What makes it possible for some people to come out triumphantly through life’s most difficult challenges?

A study by the University of Chicago reported that Americans’ personal misery has increased substantially since the early 1990s. They discovered that 92 percent of Americans report suffering at least one significant negative life event in their lifetime. These negative life events could be anything from job loss to divorce or losing a loved one, even ending up in the hospital from injury or illness. If the findings of this study are correct, it’s likely we’ve all experienced at least one major negative life event. How did you survive? Have you fully recovered? Perhaps you’re currently going through this kind of ordeal and don’t know what to do or where to begin. Maybe the following will help. According to a research done by the National Institutes of Nursing Research, it was discovered that people who recover most quickly and with less trauma demonstrated two important factors associated with resilience in the face of adversity: mastery and social support.

Most people feel paralyzed during a traumatic experience. However, when mastery is exercised, you allow yourself to enter into your personal control room to help you exert influence over life’s circumstances. In other words, instead of allowing circumstances to trap you, tell your circumstances who is in control.

The Bible is filled with examples of mastery. When Jesus was agonizing in Gethsemane He exercised mastery by saying “Father, not My will, but Yours be done,” in Luke 22:42. Jesus knew His Father’s will was going to prevail over what He was experiencing in that moment. When we know the Heavenly Father, we know that He is in control of every life affair and that His love for us is greater than any negative event in our lives.

Dr. Denise Cummins, a Fellow of the Association for Psychological Science, suggests that mastery is reinforced by simply spending time on something that you do well. Simple examples are gardening, playing a musical instrument, or even spending a little time playing games that allow the user to advance through levels of expertise—anything that makes you come away with the feeling of “I can do this” teaches your mind and body what it feels like to succeed.

This is the network of family and friends that you turn to in times of need. Whether you are facing a personal crisis and need immediate assistance or just want to spend time with people who care about you, these relationships play a critical role in both the recovery from negative life events and having your day-to-day life function well. At the peak of Jesus’s suffering before death, He relied on His social support. He asked His disciples to stay with Him while His soul was overwhelmed with sorrow. We know that His social support was less than perfect, but knowing they were there still made a difference. The point is that we must make the effort to seek relationships with people, communities, counselors, or support groups to help us navigate through difficult times. Hope will never disappoint us when we have accepted God’s infinite love and ultimate support.