rawr
2.20.15 Vol. 5 No. 21
‘Like a leaf on the wind’
page 4
Rocking Charcoal Squids page 6
Winner Buy the Dozen page 9
Inside this army Philip Vukelich | Rawr
horoscopes The Argonaut
2
Your work in
Rawr illustration photography mixed media
2.20.15
Pisces 2/19-3/20 Opportunity is coming your way, Pisces. Pick up the phone when it rings and follow your dreams.
paintings sculptures short fiction poetry
Aries 3/21-4/19
forget about the good in your own life.
Now is a good time to get back in touch with your creative side. Start a blog online or buy a journal to keep track of your thoughts.
Leo 7/23-8/22
Taurus 4/20-5/20 Show a little trust in the world around you. Things will work out the way they are supposed to. They always do.
non-fiction Rawr is an alternative weekly publication covering art, culture, campus life and entertainment.
Gemini 5/21-6/21 You were expecting this year to go differently than it has so far — and that’s okay. Life is full of unexpected turns. It’s all part of the fun.
We are accepting all forms of art and creativity to be featured inside the publication or on the cover.
Cancer 6/22-7/22
Be careful not to compare your life to the lives of others. Jealousy and envy are two emotions that can make you
Email: arg-arts@uidaho.edu
Spend some time in the fresh air next week. You need to clear your head of unnecessary worries — fresh air is the best way to do so.
Virgo 8/23-9/22 Be patient. Good things are just around the corner, but they likely won’t come when you are always in such a hurry. Slow down a little bit and enjoy life.
Libra 9/23-10/22
Change your perspective and you change your life. Is the cup half empty or half full?
Scorpio 10/23-11/21 Things have been going very well in
Alexia Neal | Rawr
your life lately. Slow down a bit and appreciate what you have now.
Sagittarius 11/22-12/21 This is a good time to appreciate the people you love. Remember to tell your friends and family you are thankful for them.
Capricorn 12/22-1/19 With spring just around the corner, now is a good time to start getting into shape and eating healthy. You may have slacked off a little this winter.
Aquarius 1/20-2/18 You set a lot of personal goals at the beginning of the year. They are all achievable, but make sure to keep working towards them.
Easy listening “Disappearing World” by David Gray A smooth and simple tune, this song is both melancholy and comforting at the same time, creating a grand song in the process.
“Chances” by Five for Fighting
Stripped to the bare minimum of Bryce Avary’s voice and a simple guitar, “Soldiers” shows less is more when it comes to making a great song.
“Never Say Never” by The Fray These piano driven rockers can always be counted on to deliver Rawr a cool slow song, and “Never Say Never” is one of their best. This says a lot coming from this band’s discography.
Bradley Burgess
Five for Fighting’s gorgeous piano and soothing vocals are here in spades in this emotionpacked song. It’s a beautiful melody that will melt everyone’s hearts.
“Soldiers” by The
Rocket Summer
“Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol
This Irish group’s biggest hit is a beautiful, melodic song with interesting sounds backing it up. A winning combination, one might say.
“Youth” by Daughter With ethereal vocals, evolving guitars and unique lyrics, Daughter’s eerie, yet gorgeous song is a must-add to any easy listening playlist.
“I Will Follow You Into the Dark” by Death Cab for Cutie Only Death Cab for Cutie could make a song about death cool and relaxing, and we don’t fault them for it. In fact, it’s
rather commendable.
“Jenny” by The Maine Namechecking a girl in a song doesn’t always work, but it does here, especially because John O’Callaghan soothes souls with his vocals dedicated to his muse.
“Space To Share” by Scapegoat Wax Turn on this song and enjoy its simple beauty and heartfelt lyrics. There isn’t
much else to say to do justice to its greatness.
“The Lucky Ones” by Brendan James Brendan James appeals to all with his uplifting and empowering song that still manages to be soft and soothing while also inspiring energy and enthusiasm for life. Bradley Burgess can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
Rawr
3
Post-holiday pets Cure for post-Valentine’s Day relationship hangovers Valentine’s Day came and went again. The herds of bitterly single people can take their hands off their ears and return to social media without fear of inordinate displays of hearts, flowers, chocolate, sappy one-liners and public affection. Unfortunately, this post-holiday slump can be a challenging time for others. For the already single people in the world, Valentine’s Day serves as a rude reminder of their relationship status. For the even less lucky, a disastrous holiday can lead to a return to the Cy Whitling lonely life. Rawr Every year, this seemingly soft, fluffy and generally pink holiday devours plenty of poor, unprepared souls. Valentine’s Day can take a seemingly wonderful relationship and fry it in truffle oil, serve it with a nice garlic butter garnish, devour it with a classy glass of red wine and expel it as a shattered, nearly unrecognizable wreck of what it once was. Scoffers beware, all it takes is one capsized canoe or one rainy walk to throw a bulletproof relationship into an emotional tailspin resulting in what can only be called the “Recently Single Post-Valentine’s Day Relationship Hangover.” Don’t worry, I’m here with the cure. As a recently single, possibly heartbroken individual, Moscow can seem like a barren and lonely place, but it’s time to ditch that negative attitude and start exploring this paradise. Animal therapy is a great place to start. Sure, anyone could go to the animal shelter and pet some dogs or something, but let’s face it, recently single people need the release only wild animals can provide. Bunnies are pretty good for petting, and several live up by the Administration Building. Not only do wanderers get to pet something fuzzy, the challenge of luring
Emily Vaartstra | Crumbs
them in will provide a distraction from a newly pathetic relationship issues. Another option is squirrels. These are harder to capture, but sometimes they can be caught unaware. I’ve found a good technique is to leave some Cheetos in a planter far from any tree. Once the squirrel enters the planter to investigate, simply jump out of hiding and grab it. There are few better ways to introduce yourself to eligible bachelors or bachelorettes than, “Hey, I just caught this squirrel with my bare hands, wanna pet it?” Any of the ponds and streams around town offer animal alternatives as well. Beavers, muskrats and ducks are all very therapeutic creatures when caught, calmed and petted. Snakes, frogs and turtles are also available, but they are not quite so soothing to pet and don’t work as well as a pickup line. In fact, using a snake to introduce yourself may be perceived as harassment in some states. DISCLAIMER: Make sure you are up to date on your rabies shots. Also, don’t blame me when your mom, friend, university official or basically any adult gets you in trouble for kidnapping local wildlife. Regardless of the choice of therapy animal, Moscow offers the perfect setting to recover from a failed Valentine’s Day and ensuring the success of the Recently Single Post Valentine’s Day Relationship Hangover. Cy Whitling can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
A Crumbs recipe It’s a muffin or a doughnut? Ingredients n 3 cups flour n 3 teaspoons baking powder n 1 teaspoon salt n 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg n 1 cup sugar n 2/3 cups shortening n 2 eggs n 1 cup milk n 1 cup sugar n 2 teaspoons cinnamon n 1 stick butter
Directions 1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit and lightly grease a muffin tin 2. Stir flour, baking powder, salt and nutmeg in a large bowl 3. In a different bowl, mix shortening and one cup of sugar until creamed. Add the eggs and mix again 4. Add flour mixture and milk alternately to the shortening mixture. Make sure to beat well after each addition 5. Fill muffin tin cups two-thirds full 6. Bake the muffins for 20-25 minutes or until golden.* 7. In a small bowl, melt the stick of butter, and in a separate small bowl stir one cup of sugar with the cinnamon 8. Dip the tops of the muffins in the melted butter and then roll in the cinnamon-sugar mixture *For miniature muffins, bake for 10-15 minutes or until golden
The Argonaut
4
Charcoal Squids
2.20.15
Student band starts the scene
Masen Matthews rawr
The Palouse has a new musical force on the horizon. Charcoal Squids is a fivepiece band that formed in 2014, and the group set out to climb the local music ladder in Moscow and beyond. They’re already making a name for themselves, playing shows in town, and music fans in the Palouse should start paying attention. Charcoal Squids is made up of front man Josh Bacha on guitar and vocals, vocalist Maddie Marx, bassist Zach Zerrade, guitarist Kevin Green and drummer Mason Donaldson. The odd name, Zerrade said, came from left field after Bacha watched a documentary about squids. It stuck after that, and now Zerrade said the group is like a squad of squids. The group started to form five months ago with a few songs written by Bacha and Green. Zerrade and Donaldson joined shortly after, followed by a short stint with another female vocalist before Marx joined. With their solidified lineup, the band began playing shows in Moscow at houses and apartments, Bacha said. The group plays a selfdescribed variant of “aggressive clean indie music,” molded by a wide variety of influences, including The Decembrists, The Oh Sees and more. Upon first listen, it’s clear the wide variety of influences manifests itself into a dynamic, rich sound. Tinges of genres ranging from folk to punk to alternative and more are all evident within their sound, which makes their music both accessible and easy to listen to while being unique at the same time. Charcoal Squids is currently planning to release an extended play, EP, in the coming weeks titled “Yellow Bicycle,” which
Josh Bacha | Courtesy
will be their first official release. In terms of where the band could be headed, Bacha sounded optimistic and motivated. They’re currently aiming to conquer the Palouse and surrounding areas and subsequently break into Missoula’s music scene, hopefully followed by Seattle, Portland and more in the distant future. “We want to get as far as we possibly can go,” Bacha said. “We have been brainstorming some ideas for a small tour on the west coast this next year or so ... We have made great leaps and bounds over the past couple of months, and it only appears to be getting better from here.” Anyone interested in hearing music from Charcoal Squids can check them out at their official band page on Facebook. The group also has a SoundCloud account featuring a few demos of songs they’ve written and recorded. They will also play a show at the Pizza Pit, Saturday. Be sure to keep those eyes open for their debut EP coming out in the next couple of weeks. Masen Matthews can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
Halle Gilbert | Courtesy
From left, Maddie Marx, Josh Bacha and Zach Zerrade of the Charcoal Squids. The self-described “aggressive clean indie music” band will play at the Pizza Pit at 8 p.m. Saturday.
Rawr
5
Eat more chicken Tips and tricks for the perfect bird
Cooking is a skill that people either oil. Without the fat, the breading won’t be as crispy and crunchy. have or don’t. Some people are just born with it, while others have to Oven fried take cooking classes or just I use oven frying every time eat Top Ramen every day. Not I make chicken parmesan. It everyone is a good cook, and is really easy, and I can throw some people are bad cooks. chicken in the oven without However, it doesn’t take having to keep too close of an much to perfect the basics, eye on it. especially one step at a time. All it takes is a wire cooling First, poultry. Specifically Claire rack and a rimmed baking tray chicken since it is super Whitley in addition to drizzles of oil. cheap and easy to buy with Rawr The oven is usually turned the large bags of flash frozen up to a higher temperature, at least breasts at WinCo. There are several 400 degrees Fahrenheit, and most methods to cook chicken and it all recipes call for turning the chicken depends on the meal at hand, or the at least once during the cooking time a cook has to make dinner. process. I suggest turning it a couple There are some tips not mentioned of times, especially with any bread in this beginning guide such as barbecrumbs or coating on it, just so it quing, slow cooking and grilling. won’t get stuck to the wire rack. Oven baked For all of these tips, the biggest thing to know is when chicken is done. This is one of the simplest ways Raw poultry is never a good thing, and to cook chicken. Just put chicken on chicken is one of the worst raw foods a baking tray and pop it in the oven. to eat. However, chicken is also bad However, this is one of the easiest when dry. There has to be a perfect ways to overcook chicken. While it will take about 20 minutes to cook at balance between juicy and done. The easiest way to tell when 350 degrees Fahrenheit, it is best to chicken is done is to just cut into it keep an eye on it. Check it occasionand check to see the meat is white ally to make sure it isn’t overcooked all the way through. After this check, or undercooked. I always cook chicken another minPan fried ute just to make sure it is done. For pasta fans, I suggest using Generally, I only bring out the knife any pan fried methods since they if I’m unsure the chicken is done. I first are generally faster and on the stove check it by pressing on it, or squeezing top ready to combine with sauce the chicken with tongs. It should be and noodles. While many health food mostly firm, with just a bit of give. people frown about the term fried, it For the first couple of times is easy to make “fried” healthier. cooking chicken, I suggest practicing For chicken alfredo, I usually fry the firmness method in addition to chicken in a tablespoon or two of olcutting open whatever is in the pan. ive oil. It is healthier than canola oil It will help associate the two which or butter, and doesn’t add too much will make the latter method easier. “fried” flavor to anything. Claire Whitley Fried chicken on the other hand can be reached at needs canola oil or a fatter type of crumbs@uidaho.edu
The Argonaut
6
2.20.15
Small-town doughnuts Local doughnut shop wins TV contest Daphne Jackson rawr
Sometimes a hobby can turn into something more. Kris Wallace, owner of local doughnut shop Buy the Dozen, recently won a Cooking Network competition called Donut Showdown. She said she started making full-sized doughnuts after her experience on the show, which required contestants to make a variety of doughnuts around a Mardi Gras theme. “When I came back, I knew I had won and I just thought ‘OK, I guess this is what I’m supposed to be doing now,’ so I started when I got back a year ago,” Wallace said. “And then I thought, ‘I’m in Idaho, I should be making potato doughnuts,’ so I started making potato doughnuts.” She said her experience on the show was crazy and stressful in a good way, since she was less experienced with large doughnuts than the other competitors. “I was just hoping not to embarrass myself, and then when I saw who the judges were, I was really freaked out,” Wallace said. “I thought it would be the judges from the first season, and those were Canadian personalities. And then I walked out when they introduced me, and I saw Duff Goldman and Elizabeth Falkner.” The contest took place Feb. 10, 2014 but the episode didn’t air in the U.S. until almost a year later, Feb. 11, 2015. During the time in between, Wallace wasn’t allowed to talk about winning Donut Showdown. She said it still seemed strange to tell people about it after being
quiet for so long. Wallace said she decided to sell doughnuts at the Moscow Farmers’ Market six years ago after seeing a mini doughnut stand on a weekend trip to Pike Place. “There was nothing at the Farmers’ Market that my kids could really share when they walked around,” she said. “Everything cost more than I wanted to spend, so I just thought it would be perfect for Farmers’ Market, and I was really shocked when we moved here that there wasn’t a doughnut shop.” After several seasons in the Farmers’ Market, Buy the Dozen moved into a shop downtown. They are open mornings Wednesday through Sunday. Wallace’s husband John said he usually isn’t involved in running the shop. “I’m more involved in the summer when we do Farmers Market,” he said. “Then I’m the setup and teardown guy, but she’s the doughnut maker, the doughnut creator. I’m just the labor.” Buy the Dozen was especially crowded for the days after the episode first aired in the U.S. John said his wife’s participation in the competition was a positive experience overall. “It was great that they invited her on, it was great that she was able to find someone to help her that had a knowledge base and was good at the whole baking thing,” he said. “And she was only gone for a couple days. We have four kids, so (she) left me home with those four kids, but we managed.” Daphne Jackson can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
Daphne Jackson | Argonaut
Kris Wallace makes mini doughnuts with a machine designed specifically for that purpose. Wallace has sold mini doughnuts for six years and full sized doughnuts for one year.
Rawr
7
Jackson Flynn | Argonaut
Seniors Jimmy Mueller, left, and Forrest Walker, right, enjoy a meal at the newly opened Last Frontier Pizza Company. It is located at 125 East 2nd St. in Moscow.
Filling the late night void Rustic pizza restaurant opens in downtown Moscow Patrick Hanlon rawr
Dressed in a white apron, flour under his fingernails and with the smell of pizza in the air, owner Nikolaos Lagos said he warmly welcomes customers to his new pizza restaurant. Lagos and his business partner Jenny Alexandropoulos started the idea of Last Frontier Pizza Company in August last year. The pair said they saw the need for a new pizza restaurant in Moscow for families and college students to enjoy pizza by-the-slice or as a whole pie.
Since opening Dec. 15, Last Frontier Pizza Company has grown a loyal local customer base, Lagos said. “We’ve got a great niche,” Lagos said. “We have quality pizza that’s perfect for families or students at an affordable price.” Lagos said he took inspiration from New York and New Haven style pizza and refined his recipes with the help of his family in Alaska. Learning from years of experience his father and uncle have in the pizza business gave Lagos his inspiration and the charisma to open the restaurant. The owners of the restaurant roll their own pizza dough and make their own sauces and even some of their meats every morning from scratch.
Last Frontier offers a wide variety of dishes, from pizza and salads to gyros and Philly cheesesteaks, but the signature pizza, “The Last Frontier,” has been the local favorite so far,” Lagos said. The restaurant gets its name from Alaska, which is known as the last frontier. Lago’s father owned many pizzerias when he was growing up in Alaska, and that was the style of business he has grown to know and love. Lagos said he loves sharing his family’s creations with students and residents of the Palouse. Last Frontier Pizza Company resides in the old location of local favorite Piehole Pizza, which closed its doors last June. Lagos and Alexandropoulos said they wanted to give Last Frontier a rustic makeover. The pair had new wood
benches and tables custom built to give the restaurant a rustic feeling. “The place was already pretty rustic when we bought it,” Lagos said. “It was a great starting point.” Not only does Last Frontier Pizza Company serve pizza by the slice, it also fills the void for late night munchies. They are open between 11 a.m. and 9 p.m. Monday through Thursday, and open later Friday and Saturday nights. “We’re proud that we can come to Moscow and get to know the community,” Lagos said. “We have people come in for their first time and they’ve been repeat customers since.” Patrick Hanlon can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
The Argonaut
8
2.20.15
Palouse Power Palouse Comic Con unites local fans Bradley Burgess rawr
For the second annual PAC Con Palouse on Jan. 31, the SEL Event Center in Pullman was flooded with local comic book fans, artists and vendors. The convention, mirrored off the larger scale San Diego Comic Con, drew a large crowd, many of whom dressed up as characters like Deadpool, Loki and Link from the “The Legend of Zelda” series. There were several panels, including game shows, advice on how to construct a costume on a budget, card game tournaments and a costume contest. Special guests also arrived at the convention, including actress Clare Kramer from “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” comic book artists James O’Barr and Chad Hardin and veteran animator Tom Cook, whose credits include classic cartoons like “Scooby-Doo,” “He-Man” and “The Flinstones.” Cook has been animating since 1978. His favorite creation was “Thundar, the Barbarian,” co-created by comic book artist Jack Kirby, who worked alongside Stan Lee on several comics including “The Fantastic Four.” “I live very close to here,” Cook said, “and Jake (Mackessy, PAC Con founder) is a good friend of mine and we do a lot of conventions together. It’s always fun to be here in the Palouse. Every convention has its own little life. Some conventions are more “Scooby-Doo” centric, other ones are really more “He-Man.” I did a really good panel last year. The place was just packed as I talked about how we made cartoons.” Other artists like Ivan Rodriguez and Greg Scott Bailey appeared at the convention, selling artwork they created as well as doing custom drawings for guests. “I love meeting new people,” Rodri-
Watch the video at youtube.com/user/ uiargonaut uiargonaut.com Aly Soto | Rawr
guez said. “I like to come over and see their work and to me, that’s the best part.” Even local filmmakers appeared at the convention, such as Ruth Gregory, creator of the upcoming series, “Music of the Spheres,” described as “an interactive sci-fi webseries” about a grad student who discovers a device that can alter space and time. Gregory hopes to shoot the first two seasons for the series this summer. “The inspiration came from a couple places,” Gregory said. “I worked at
Pullman in the summer of 2014, when all the students were gone for UI and WSU, and it just felt otherworldly. At the same time, I was reading a lot of Stephen Hawking and watching a lot of ‘Cosmos’ and it all just came together.” It wasn’t just long time comic fans that showed up either. Some were fresh faced, at least in terms of their comic con debut. “I’ve actually never been to a comic con before,” said Francesca Fierce, dressed as Harley Quinn. “And when Aquasha (Delusty, host of the costume
contest) gave me the opportunity to dress up and help make these costumes — she actually was the one who designed the whole thing — and I was not going to pass up that opportunity. I mean, are you kidding me?“ With the support of the artists and the guests, the convention came together as an exciting experience for the Palouse. Another pop culture and comic convention is already in the works for next year. Bradley Burgess can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
Rawr
9
Jordan Hollingshead | Rawr
‘I will have my revenge’ A free app worth millions and Liam Neeson
advance far enough in the game, most upgrades take seven or more days to finish. But don’t let this scare you off, I have been playing this game for a year and a half and I’ve just recently begun waiting for those weeklong upgrades. Clash of Clans is easy enough to understand and The most recent Clash of Clans commercial, which just as easy to get addicted to. aired during the 2015 Super Bowl earlier this month, There are Gold Mines, Elixir Pumps and Dark Elixir featured Liam Neeson being raided by BigBufDrills, which give players the resources needed fetBoy85, all while mimicking the voice of his to buy and upgrade defenses, buildings, walls character in “Taken.” and troops. Upgrading defenses will make A 30-second ad in the 2015 Super Bowl cost it harder for other players to defeat a base, about $4.5 million, which has some people which allows players to keep their gold, elixir, wondering how Supercell, the Clash of Clans dark elixir and trophies. app creator, could afford to spend the $9 milUpgrading buildings will allow players to lion on their one-minute ad for their most hold more of one resource. Walls are a major popular free app. part of a defense, because the higher level the Jordan Although the app is free, there is an option Hollingshead walls are, the longer it takes for enemy troops Rawr in the game to purchase gems that players to get through them. can use to speed up the process of upgradThe last thing anybody thinking about ing troops, defenses and other key buildings. Due to playing this game needs to know is to upgrade your a large portion of players not having the patience to troops. Upgraded troops are stronger and have a betwait for their upgrades to finish, Supercell brought in ter chance of beating other players’ bases and taking $1.8 billion from Clash of Clans last year. their resources. Although there is the option to buy gems in the Beating a player’s base or successfully defending game, it is playable without spending the money. against an attack will give you trophies. Clash of Players just have to be a little more patient. Once they Clans has a league system, which means the more tro-
phies people get, the better the league they are placed in. This is meant to try and keep the really good players from attacking the beginners. The best part of the game, however, is mentioned in its title: Clash of Clans. This game allows players to band together and create a clan of up to 50 players, which can consist of best friends or random strangers from around the world. The benefits of being in a clan include the ability for clan members to donate troops to either use in attacks or keep for defense and Clan Wars. Clan War is a clan-on-clan battle to the death to determine who the better clan is. Clan Wars is the only thing that has made this game as popular as it is. Without being in a clan and participating in the Clan Wars, the game would get boring in a hurry. By allowing clans to attack each other, Supercell made Clash of Clans a game you do not want to put down. I give Clash of Clans a five star rating, due to it being easy to play, its ability to connect with users, it keeps them interested and it is hard to stop playing. Supercell has done a great job updating and keeping all sections of the game from being overpowered. If you have not already downloaded the game, I would suggest giving it a try. Jordan Hollingshead can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu
The Argonaut
10
2.20.15
Friday Fiction
Gossip in the woods Kelly P. Vickers rawr
The black bear was sitting by a cluster of ancient pine trees (nobody knew the exact age of the trees, but no one really knew how to count anyways and the mortality age was significantly low this year, so no one had time to care). Every once and a while the bear’s glossy black paw rose up like a menacing club and smacked against his own forehead, as if he forgot to pick up his cub from tree climbing. But everyone knows papa bears don’t hang out with their cubs. They’re all about nature taking its course with mama bear and then they scram before parenting sucks the life out of them. “Alright, I’ll bite,” the wolf said. “Who we got down there this time?” He plopped his rear next to the bear’s, and his tail got caught between his legs. The wolf grumbled about how the stupid thing never obeyed him and made him look like a pansy all the time. Bear smacked his forehead again and his beast of a body shook with minor tremors through the ground. “Some Pop with his cub came in this morning,” Bear replied. He pointed between the gap of trees where an opening closer to the stream made for a secluded camping spot. “Rahaha, this human can’t build a shelter worth a handful of berries! Check out the cub,” the wolf sneered. Bear laughed his high-pitched laugh again and smacked his forehead. They watched as the male human struggled to get a long skinny stick inside the red cave made out of some flimsy material they didn’t have out in the wilderness. No one understood why the humans had collapsible caves in the first place. Every time a new human showed up, maybe even with his pack, the animals would watch as they brawled with the flimsy cave until it finally stood up so it could provide shelter. The smaller male human — Champ, they heard him called once — was sitting on a stump made from the same kind of material, but it had a place to rest his front paws on either side. The champ was staring at an object between his paws, and his long claws
were moving up and down as funny sounds came out it. “This might be the best one we’ve seen this year,” Wolf said. They chuckled when the cave collapsed again, and the man chucked a rock at a tree. “Hey guys, what’s going on? Oh wait, don’t tell me, we got another nester in the clearing,” Hawk perched herself on a thick branch above Wolf’s head. “How long has he been at that cave?” “I saw him take it out when the sun was at the center of the sky and it’s touching the peak of the mountain now,” Bear said. “We may be seeing a new record with this one,” Wolf said. “I can almost smell it.” “I’m going to get Doe. She won’t want to miss this one,” Hawk said and promptly flew off. The male human walked over to Champ and was waving his paws around before he snatched the strange object Champ was holding and pointed to the red cave that laid flat on the dirt. Champ got up and kicked at a rock, hitting the same tree. “These guys just don’t get it do they,” Wolf said. “I wouldn’t piss a tree off like that.” “You do that every day,” Bear said. “Waatch you aall looking aat?” Ram clopped over to peek between the gap and accidentally stepped on Wolf’s tail, which was laying cooperatively beside him. “Ahoooh! Gosh dangit, Ram, get out of here,” Wolf snarled. “What? I just want to see — ” “Just go!” Bear said. He lobbed a pine cone at Ram, but missed. “Please, guys, just this once I want to —” “GO!” Bear and Wolf said at the same time. Ram sunk his head down and clopped off. ‘Rmf, he is so annoying,” Bear grunted. “Tell me about it.” Wolf reached around and cleaned his tail. “You can lick your butt later, just not in front of me. Ah, dangit we missed it! They got the dumb cave up already,” Bear complained The two humans had finally opened up the mouth of the cave and were putting their hoard of stuff inside. Then Champ shuffled off with his paws
Danlin Li | Rawr
inside the flimsy material covering his hind quarters. Humans were seriously obsessed with the stuff. “They sure look miserable, don’t they?” Bear said. “You know, we are the smart ones. Me, I just abandoned my cubs and life is all dandy, no worries. You, you just have a ton of pups all at once and they can take care of each other. Problem solved. We don’t have to worry about all this bonding, attachment stuff like those humans are always fussing about.” “Aight, let’s see this so called record-breaking development,” a new voice chimed. Hawk was drifting above Doe who glided over and stopped next to Bear. “S’up Bear.” She stiffened. “Wolf.” “Doe.” Wolf glared. “Could you two get along for once?” Hawk said. “Awe you’ve got to be kidding me! We missed it?” “I know ya’ll di’in wake me up from my nap fo nothin so there sure as hell betta be somethin good happenin or I’m outta here,” Doe said. “Gosh, Doe, just cool it,” Bear said. “It can only get better. Looks like they are about to head to the stream to catch some fish with their fish sticks. This is gonna be good. I can’t believe the fish fall for this game. I’m telling
you, fish are the stupidest living things in the wild.” “Well you catch em and eat em, so what does that make you?” Doe said. Wolf barked. Hawk squawked. Bear groaned. They all decided to move closer to the clearing for a better view of the stream. The male human was wading in the water and waiting for Champ to get in. Hawk got close enough to hear Champ say, “This is stupid, Dad,” but no one spoke human, so he couldn’t understand what Champ meant. Champ finally got in the water, but he fell over in the current. “Watcha doin guys huh watcha doin watcha looking at huh?” They all jumped at the deep bass voice of Chipmunk. “Damn Chip, ya think ya coulda warned us before sneakin up like that?” Doe said. ‘Sorry guys. I didn’t mean to scare you. What are we looking at, huh, huh?” Chipmunk asked. “New humans from the clearing are playing hook the fish with stick. Looks like the male human caught a mini one,” Wolf said. “I’m gonna sneak into their cave and see if they got anything good. You in, Bear?” *To be continued
Rawr
y a d
Fri ctoids Fa
The New York Times did stories about every victim of the 9/11 attacks. If humans had the eyesight of eagles, they would be able to see an ant on the ground from the top of a 10-story building.
A tree in southern Africa is called the “bloodwood tree” because the sap is blood red. Clash of Clans, a phone game, makes more than $1 million per day.
11
Polymathy 1. encyclopedic knowledge
Example:
Scientists still don’t know the purpose behind different blood types. The headphones “Beats” by Dre, which can cost up to $450, only cost about $14 to produce.
The history professor’s polymathy of Aztec politics surprised his students.
D R WO K
If Queen Elizabeth II is still the ruling monarch Sept. 9, 2015, she will surpass Victoria as the longest reigning monarch in British history.
E E W
From wtffacts.com
The Colossally Amazing Adventures of Norbert (and Friends) by Samantha Brownell
Why Norbert and Sammy Never Play Humans Vs. Zombies: Because this would happen...literally two seconds after starting...
RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rawr
12
2.20.15
Did you know...? The Vandal Food Pantry has five locations: - Student Support Services (Commons 306) - Student Media (3rd floor of the Bruce Pitman Center) - Diversity Center (TLC 229) - Campus Christian Center (822 Elm St.) - Counseling and Testing Center (Mary E. Forney Hall 3rd floor) - Student Recreation Center (Vandal Health Ed Room)
Idaho Commons: 885 . 2667 info@uidaho.edu
No student should be worried about food insecurity. Check out www.uidaho.edu/volunteer for more info.
Bruce Pitman Center: 885 . 4636 www.sub.uidaho.edu