MEN OF HONOUR A Promise Keepers Canada Devotional for Fathers
The Seven Promises 1. A Promise Keeper is committed to honouring Jesus Christ through worship, prayer, and obedience to God’s Word in the power of the Spirit. 2. A Promise Keeper is committed to pursuing Christ-centred friendships with a few other men, connecting regularly, understanding that he needs brothers to help him keep his promises. 3. A Promise Keeper is committed to practicing biblical integrity: spiritually, morally, ethically, and sexually. 4. A Promise Keeper is committed to strengthening families and marriages through love, honour, protection, and biblical values. 5. A Promise Keeper is committed to supporting the mission of his church by honouring and praying for his pastor, and by actively giving his time and resources. 6. A Promise Keeper is committed to reaching beyond racial, social, economic, generational, and denominational barriers to demonstrate the power of biblical unity. 7. A Promise Keeper is committed to influencing the world by his fervent love for God while loving his neighbour, seeking justice for the poor and oppressed, and making disciples of Jesus Christ.
Contents Few of us grasp how important the role of a father is. It is significant that God has described himself to us as our Heavenly Father and provided a model for us to aspire to. As dads we need to realize He is calling us to something greater than ourselves. He created the position of father as an essential part of the family unit. He is calling us to bless those around us. He is asking us to step up and be faithful. He is asking us to become . . . MEN OF HONOUR
SECTION 1 HONOUR THE CALL by Steve Hahn Contrary to the message often communicated in our culture, fathers play a critical role in their families. We want to celebrate dads and challenge them to live up to the high calling God has given them.
3 Devotion 1 4 Devotion 2 5 Devotion 3 6 Devotion 4 8 Devotion 5 9 Devotion 6 10 Resources
Dads Matter Our Role Model Investing Time Understanding the Plan A Note From Steve’s Daughter, Kendra A Walk Down the Aisle
SECTION 2 HONOUR GOD by Robert White God is our Heavenly Father; our role model and our source of wisdom, strength and love. Our relationship with God is foundational to being a great dad and creating a heritage of faith.
11 Devotion 7 12 Devotion 8 14 Devotion 9 16 Devotion 10 17 Devotion 11 18 Devotion 12 19 Resources
Honour God: With Worship Honour God: As Our Spiritual Head Honour God: With Our Gifts and Talents Honour God: With Work Honour God: Through Our Trials and Troubles Honouring God: By Ending Well
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SECTION 3 HONOUR YOUR PARENTS by Phil Wagler Although the religious leaders strove for holiness Jesus called them to task for their failure to honour their parents. Who we are as dads is profoundly influenced by our parents and the honour we show them.
20 Devotion 13 21 Devotion 14 22 Devotion 15 24 Devotion 16 25 Devotion 17 26 Devotion 18 27 Resources
The Burning Baton Honour Up Good Parent/Bad Parent Choosing Submission Spiritual Parents Your Assignment
SECTION 4 HONOUR THEIR MOTHER by Jeff Stearns As dads we are role models for our children. They watch how we work, live out our faith and how we treat others. How we treat their mother will be one of our most significant legacies.
28 Devotion 19 29 Devotion 20 30 Devotion 21 31 Devotion 22 32 Devotion 23 33 Devotion 24 34 Resources
Modeling the Love of Christ Modeling Forgiveness Modeling the Fruit the Spirit Modeling Patience and Self-control Modeling Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness Modeling Faithfulness
SECTION 5 RAISING HONOURABLE KIDS by Rick Johnson Building on the foundation laid over the previous four weeks we explore practical advice for raising kids to be men and women of honour. May God bless us as we seek to be faithful to the high calling he has given us.
35 Devotion 25 36 Devotion 26 38 Devotion 27 39 Devotion 28 40 Devotion 29 41 Devotion 30 42 Resources
2 Men of Honour
What is Honour? Why Honour Matters The Starting Place for Raising Honourable Kids Why Manners Matter Living an Honour Code Passing on a Legacy of Honour
DEVOTION 13
HONOUR YOUR PARENTS SECTION 3
by Phil Wagler
THE BURNING BATON “Do not come any closer, God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” Then he said, “I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.” At this Moses hid his face, because he was afraid to look at God. EXODUS 3 : 5–6 NIV
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oses was a fugitive from justice. Life for him had fallen on hard times as he wanders about with sheep in the blessed middle of nowhere. However,
when the LORD calls Moses it is a call back to his roots; a reminder that God’s
action in his little corner of the boondocks is not random, but interwoven with a rich spiritual heritage. This must have been wonderfully grounding—holy grounding—for Moses. The marvelous sight of a bush that will not be consumed is the act of the same God his slaving father cried out to, Jacob wrestled with; the same God who redeemed Isaac from the altar and the same King who called Abraham to be a blessing to all nations. Moses, the Hebrew with an Egyptian name, was not a nobody, but now caught up in a new time when his generation would discover what it meant to trust the LORD and continue the story of faithfulness that had been written by the mothers and fathers before them. When the Holy Spirit opens our eyes, grabs our attention and reveals God’s glory, it is not a lonely, individualized grace. His work in our time is always connected to those who have come before us. When we gaze up at him, we equally gaze up at his work in history we are now honoured to join. Our “burning bush” is a baton-passing. Daily Reading: Genesis 12: 1–3; Genesis 26 : 1–5; Genesis 28 : 10–17
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DEVOTION 14
SECTION 3 Honour Your Parents
HONOUR UP “Honour your father and mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.” EXODUS 20 : 12 NIV
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e live in a child-centered culture. Parents bend over backwards to give their children every experience and opportunity. We cheer the latest
young “idol” while age is often marginalized and seen as passé. Joy in children is undeniably beautiful and right. The Bible speaks of children as a delight and child-likeness is held up as the nature of genuine faith. Our eyes are to be open for the child needing attention. However, is what we experience in the child-centeredness of our culture equivalent to this perspective in Scripture? The Bible sees the responsibility to train flowing down, but honour flowing up.
The fifth commandment (read above) is the hinge between our relationship with God and our world. The first four commandments describe how we relate to the LORD who is and delivers and the last six relate to human community in light of the fact that he is and has redeemed. The practical outworking of the Godcentered life begins in the first place of social interaction where the reality of God and our world initially collide—our homes. There we are to learn the beauty and labour of honouring up in the light of our new freedom. Honour that flows up is a biblical command. The result is social health and wholeness. The reversal of this in any culture is not a good sign for those hoping for life that is abundant. How’s your honouring up going? What does your answer to that reveal? Daily Reading: Leviticus 19 : 32; Psalm 127; Proverbs 16 : 31; Ephesians 6 : 1–4
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DEVOTION 15
GOOD PARENT/BAD PARENT “(Abijah) committed all the sins his father had done before him… Asa did what was right in the eyes of the LORD, as his father David had done.” 1 KINGS 15 : 3, 11 NIV
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rom David on the kings of Israel are evaluated by how they mirrored him. This is cause for pause. On one hand, David was a spiritual giant whose heart after
God set a pole-vault-high standard to live up to. On the other hand, he was a moral adventure who passed on regrettable consequences to future generations.
Those in his train would be measured by whether they related to God as he had while inheriting a family of origin history they did nothing to create. Some embraced that call, others heaped dysfunction upon dysfunction. Sound familiar? We each have a heaven-ward standard to meet and a human reality to steward. All our stories can have this messy mix and as we figure that out and take responsibility for our part we are called to humble contemplation by the poetry of Thomas Fuller (1608–1661):
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Honour Your Parents SECTION 3
Lord, I find the genealogy of my Saviour strangely checkered with four remarkable changes in four generations. Rehoboam begat Abia:
A bad father begat a bad son.
Abia begat Asa:
A bad father and a good son.
Asa begat Jehoshaphat:
A good father and a good son.
Jehoshaphat begat Joram:
A good father and a bad son.
I see, Lord, from hence, that my father’s piety cannot be entailed;
That is bad news for me.
But I see also that actual impiety is not hereditary;
That is good news for my son.
Daily Reading: 2 Samuel 12; 1 Kings 15: 1-24; Psalm 25
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DEVOTION 16
Honour Your Parents SECTION 3
CHOOSING SUBMISSION “Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them.” LUKE 2 : 51 NIV
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round the age of twelve we begin to change as we awaken to our own identity and search for significance. It’s also about this time that hanging
out with parents becomes a test—and sometimes testy. Forced family road trips can either be gleefully embraced or boisterously rejected as we come to our own conclusions of what we want to do with our time. Jesus is twelve years old when he accompanies his parents on the pilgrimage to Jerusalem to celebrate Passover. It’s a yearly excursion, and in those days a tedious road trip. The young tween Jesus would have had no choice. When his parents head for home with the Nazarene delegation they discover their boy is AWOL. Mary and Joseph are typical despondent and frustrated parents. For three days (yes, three days!) they search Jerusalem in
vain until they finally find him in the least likely place for a twelve-year-old boy with a taste of freedom: the temple. Jesus can’t believe they didn’t figure this out sooner: “Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?” He was at home. But, he didn’t stay there. He accepts the forced trip from his Father’s house to Nazareth. He honours the Father by honouring up. He chooses submission, the fruit of which is growth in wisdom, stature and favour. Are you still searching for your identity? How might choosing submission add to that search? Daily Reading: Luke 2 : 41–52; Hebrews 5 : 7–10; Ephesians 5 : 21–6: 4
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DEVOTION 17
SECTION 3 Honour Your Parents
SPIRITUAL PARENTS “Timothy, my son, I am giving you this command in keeping with the prophecies once made about you, so that by recalling them you may fight the battle well . . .” 1 TIMOTHY 1 : 18 NIV
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e all need spiritual parents. Our biological parents give us physical life and either they or adoptive
or foster parents shape our worldview and practices as we grow. These people may be very significant to us, but they may or may not have much influence on our needed rebirth into the family of God. It is for this family that God blesses us with spiritual parents. That’s what Paul was to Timothy. Paul literally adopted Timothy as his
son in the faith. The great apostle saw each of those who came to place their trust in Christ through his influence as his kids and he spoke into their lives as a parent. He took this responsibility very seriously and accepted his ongoing role in their lives as crucial to equip them to face the battles before them as children of the King. Who are spiritual parents in your life? Have you sought them out recently? Have you considered their wisdom and rested in their acceptance? Have you accepted their correction and rejoiced in their encouragement? And, whose spiritual parent are you? What does that child of the King need from you today? Why don’t you ask the Father and then be his embrace and voice in their life has he leads you by his Spirit? Daily Reading: Galatians 4 : 8-20; 1 Timothy 1: 12–20; Philemon
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DEVOTION 18
Honour Your Parents SECTION 3
YOUR ASSIGNMENT “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” 1 THESSALONIANS 5 : 11 ESV
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or today’s devotion I am giving you an assignment. I was going to call it homework but I do not want you to put it off; it is something you should start
right now. Otherwise the busyness of life will consume you and it is less likely you
will get it done. I would like you to write two encouragement letters; one to your mother and one to your father. For some of you this will be fairly easy. You had good parents and you can easily think of things you are grateful for. You need to tell them. For others this will be a more difficult letter to write. In the movie Courageous there is a powerful scene where the character Nathan Hayes is talking to his father. He tells him about the hurt his father has caused and how he has come to forgive him. As he continues to talk we realize he is standing at his father’s grave. If your relationship with your parent(s) has not been good it will be a difficult letter to write. Have someone read it before you send it to make sure you are acting with grace. You may have to write it more than once. For others your parent(s) are no longer living. I think it is still important to write the letter. I may be more helpful to you than you realize. Daily Reading: Proverbs 11 : 25
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PROMISE KEEPERS CANADA WOULD LIKE TO THANK THE FOLLOWING AUTHORS FOR THEIR CONTRIBUTION TO ENCOURAGE FATHERS ACROSS THIS COUNTRY THROUGH THIS DEVOTIONAL.
STEVE HAHN >> Steve pastored for 28 years prior to joining Promise Keepers Canada in May 2012 as Community Relations Manager. He desires to serve the local church in their ministry to men. Steve is married to Pat, is a father of two, and grandfather of one. He loves the outdoors: fishing, baseball, hunting, and golf (okay, maybe not golf), and the indoors when playing hockey. He loves being with family and is constantly learning what it means to be a follower of Jesus.
RICK JOHNSON >> Rick Johnson is a bestselling author of That’s My Son; That’s My Teenage Son; That’s My Girl; Better Dads, Stronger Sons; and Becoming Your Spouse’s Better Half. He is the founder of Better Dads and is a sought-after speaker at many large parenting and marriage conferences across the United States and Canada. Rick, his wife, Suzanne, and their grown children live in Oregon. To find out more about Rick Johnson, visit www.betterdads.net.
JEFF STEARNS >> Jeff has been married to Jacqueline for over 21 years and together they have five kids. With Jacqueline’s parents living in the in-law suite, Jeff’s parents across the street, five kids in the house, a guinea pig and a dog Jeff is wondering if they could get their own reality show. Just wait until the kids are old enough to start dating! Jeff serves as the National Marketing and Resource Manager for Promise Keepers Canada as well as the Editorial Director for SEVEN Magazine.
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PHIL WAGLER >> Phil is the Lead Pastor at Gracepoint Community Church in Surrey, BC and a columnist for SEVEN magazine. In his own words: I am an only child born in Ontario and was rescued by Jesus in my late teens. Together with my wife Jen we have served God’s Kingdom in different parts of the world and in Alberta, Ontario, and of course beautiful British Columbia. I have been a youth pastor, solo pastor, lead pastor, college dean, para-church servant, as well as working on dairy farms, lawn maintenance, hardware, and even dabbled in radio (and not just turning the dial!). My family joined the Gracepoint family in 2010. Jen and I are the proud parents of Caleb, Benjamin, Jessie, Sadie, Micah and Abigail and we all enjoy our pooch, Molly. I love spending time with my wife and kids, hiking, and sports (pretty much everything, but mostly hockey, baseball, football and the other football—i.e. soccer). I’m an avid reader and student of culture and am passionate about inspiring the church to be on mission with God for the transformation of our cities, towns, and side roads. I am also an author of regular columns, a book, and a lot of scribble notes.
ROBERT WHITE >> Robert is a journalist and author specializing in faith-based issues. He was editor of ChristianWeek Ontario from 2002 to 2012 and the “Pulse” section of Promise Keepers Canada’s Seven magazine from 2008 to 2012. His book, Chasing the Wind: Finding Meaningful Answers from Ancient Wisdom was the non-fiction winner of the 2010 Word Alive Press Publishing contest. He currently freelances, writes the regular “A Matter of Faith” column for the Guelph Mercury and hosts the weekly Arts Connection program, which looks at the intersection of faith, art and Canadian culture, broadcast on Faith FM. Robert lives in Guelph with his wife Pam and two adult children, Tim and Kathleen. He’s part of the Lakeside Downtown Church planting team and chaplain for the Wellington Area of Scouts Canada.
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MEN OF HONOUR A Promise Keepers Canada Devotional for Fathers
Few of us grasp how important the role of a father is. It is significant that God has described himself to us as our Heavenly Father and provided a model for us to aspire to. As dads we need to realize He is calling us to something greater than ourselves. He created the position of father as an essential part of the family unit. He is calling us to bless those around us. He is asking us to step up and be faithful. He is asking us to become‌
MEN OF HONOUR
www.PromiseKeepers.ca