Challenge, May 2011

So many events! GAAMC events, page 2; Bulletin Board, page 3; and Calendar, page 5!

CHALLENGE The Newsletter of the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County – Serving New Jersey’s GLBTI Communities Since 1972

Volume 37, Issue 4, May 2011

Hold Hands

by Mickey Suiter Recently I was in New York with a friend who had never been to the city. While walking through Chelsea, he saw two men walking down the street holding hands and smiled.

“You’d never see that in my hometown.”

That got me thinking about what may just be the final frontier of the LGBT movement – public displays of affection.

In the 1970’s, the Gay Activist Alliance of New Jersey (GAANJ) held a series of demonstrations they called Hold Hands. The two biggest consisted of forming a human chain across the George Washington Bridge and another around the Statue of Liberty. These events were political statements and displays of unity.

But before either of them, the first Hold Hands demonstration was much smaller and more personal. About a dozen same-sex couples met at the Willowbrook Mall on a Saturday afternoon a couple of weeks before Christmas in 1972. Each couple headed off separately, holding hands, wandering through the mall for over an hour. It was both terrifying and exhilarating.

My fears subsided after a few minutes when I realized that while we were getting a lot of stares, many of them nasty glares, and a few rude comments (even a shriek or two), no one was going to physically attack us. In fact, the one reaction I remember most clearly was that of a couple of high school girls who wanted to write a paper on what we were doing and the public’s reactions.

After observing us for a while and asking us tons of questions, they went off on their own, holding hands, so they could experience first-hand the reactions we were getting.

While it was wonderful to be able to hold my boyfriend’s hand in public, it was not exactly a natural, spontaneous act. It was deliberate and self-conscious. But I still enjoyed it. I wasn’t able to do it again for many years, and then only on Commercial Street in P-Town.

For years whenever I mentioned feeling stifled by not being able to show affection in public, many LGBT people disagreed with me. Their response was often, ‘I don’t approve of any public displays of affection, gay or straight.’ While I’m sure there are some people who really believe that, I think most use that as a rationalization. It’s easier to not feel restrained if you convince yourself it wasn’t something you wanted to do anyway.

Unlike in that first Hold Hands demonstration at the Willowbrook Mall, I’m not advocating public displays of affection as a political act.

But wouldn’t it be nice to feel comfortable enough to be able to do it spontan e o u s l y, w i t h o u t thought?

Maybe the real sign of how far we’ve come isn’t the number of court decisions in our favor or the number of laws we get passed, but the number of samesex couples holding hands on the Green in Morristown.

Inside Challenge Challenge Information.... ................................ page 2 GAAMC Events.............................................. page 2 The Bulletin Board......................................... page 3 This Month's Contributors................................ page 3 Gleanings: Queer news from around the world ..... page 4 Calendar ..................................................... page 5 We've Improved Your Membership! .................... page 7 Poetry: Frame of Reference............................. page 7 Getting Personal............................................ page 7 Dancing to Architecture music reviews............... page 9 GAAMC Membership & Contact Information ......... page 10

Page 2 CHALLENGE May 2011 CHALLENGE Volume 37, Number 4 May 2011 ISSN 0277-1675 Staff Editor .....................Allen Neuner Assistant Editor ............. Bill Stella Advertising Manager ............. open Circulation Manager ............. open List Manager ................ Sue Harris Submissions The deadline for all articles, inserts, and advertisements is the fifteenth of the previous month. All submissions must be provided as electronic files.

E-mail submissions to Challenge @ GAAMC.org.

Ad Rates Single issue: Full page, $125.00; Half page, $85.00; Quarter page, $45.00; Business card, $25.00. For multi-issue rates, contact the Editor at Challenge @ GAAMC.org.

GAAMC members may place one free classified ad per month, of no more than 200 characters in length.

Change of Address Please let us know your new address! All address changes should be sent to the List Manager at ChangeAddress @ GAAMC.org.

Challenge is © 2011-2012 by the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, a 501(c)3 tax-exempt not-for-profit corporation. All rights reserved. All articles reflect the views of the original contributors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of GAAMC, its officers, or executive board. All copyrights revert to the original contributors upon publication. No portion of this publication may be reproduced without the express written permission of the contributor. All articles, contributions, and advertisements are printed at the discretion of the Editor and/or GAAMC Executive Board.

GAAMC Events Every Monday OpenTalk Discussion Group: A regular weekly discussion group, open to all. Moderators: Gordon Sauer (May 2); Elias Scultori (May 9, 23); Kerry Dinkin (May 16).

NOTE: there will be no Open Talk Discussion Group on May 30. 7:00, Library First Monday of the Month Mature Men's Discussion Group: A monthly discussion group geared to men age 45 and above. Moderator: Marty Grifone. Discussion topics: May 2, "Falling in Love"; June 6, "Dealing with Health Problems". 7:00, Terrace Room Main Events May 2: Now a dazzling Broadway musical, come see where it all began when we share The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert in GAAMC’s Film Festival. This empowering tale of three traveling entertainers will raise your consciousness and have your feet tapping as you want to sing along. With outstanding performances by Terence Stamp, Hugo Weaving, and Guy Pearce, this is a must-see for anyone who’s ever been told how they can or can not live.

May 9: Mark Spina and the Theater Project from Union County College bring several pieces for our enjoyment with discussion to follow. Something familiar, something peculiar. Funny? Tragic?

Come join us and meet a dynamic group of performers.

May 16: Do you think you may have experienced discrimination in the work place? Hear what labor attorney Robyn Gigl has to say tonight. While we cannot legislate against favoritism, laws like New Jersey’s Law Against Discrimination only help us when they're enforced. Learn your rights!

May 23: You asked for it! Tonight, GAAMC provides an extended discussion group. Lately, many of our discussions have begun to run into program time and several people have asked for an extended evening to make certain everyone in the discussion gets a chance to be heard. GAAMC Safe Space rules apply!

May 30: GAAMC’s Annual Memorial Day Social! Bring your favorite side dish or dessert and share it with your friends! Extend the holiday weekend or escape from family - it’s up to you!

GAAMC’s Grillmeister will be roasting weenies, cooking hamburgers and veggie burgers, and you and your GAAMC friends will provide the rest. Past delights have included ambrosia, home made cookies and cakes, special recipe potato salads, green salads, cole slaw, deviled eggs, quinoa chili and more! Email Socials @ GAAMC.org to let us know what you’re bringing. Wow, what a feast!

Coming Next Month!

June 6: Statewide Pride – the day after Jersey Pride’s 20th Festival in Asbury Park, GAAMC members and guests will share pride stories and reminiscences from past and present even while the Month of Pride continues. Join us and we’ll even kick in some sure-fire sunburn remedies!

June 13: Pride Month continues at GAAMC with our Film Festival presentation, Prayers for Bobby. A young man’s journey to finding himself helps a mother understand her duties. The film begins at 7pm, with a discussion to follow.

May 2011 CHALLENGE Page 3

The Bulletin Board One day. One cause. Five locations You're invited to participate in the New Jersey AIDS Walk 2011! The event takes place on Sunday, May 1st, simultaneously in Asbury Park, A t l a n t i c C i t y, M o r r i s t o w n , Pennsauken, and Ridgewood, with thousands expected to walk in solidarity in support of the over 35,000 people in New Jersey living with HIV/AIDS. This year, the ten-kilometer walks benefit five New Jersey organizations.

Registration starts at 11:30 a.m.; step off time is 1:00 pm. For more information, or to register, visit www.NJAIDSWalk.org.

Switch, the well-known Boonton gay/lesbian club, welcomes all GAAMC members to witness Catfight, a series of drag competitions to determine who will be Miss Switch 2011! The winner will go on to compete in Asbury Park this June for the title of Miss Gay NJ! Come view the artistes on select Wednesday nights (May 4 and 18) for preliminary competitions. Then cheer on your favorites at the final Pageant on Saturday, May 21st!

Switch is generously donating 20% of the $5/person door charge to GAAMC, so encourage all your friends to attend! These are Catfights you won't want to miss!

Former GAAMC board member Paul Greenberg announces that this year's AIDS Walkathon, being held May 15th, will be his eighteenth! Since eighteen is chai (life) in Hebrew, Paul is welcoming donations given in multiples of 18. Paul, who will be walking again as a Star-Walker for Macy's team, has set a personal goal for himself of raising $2000 this year. The Walkathon, which takes place in Central Park, benefits the Gay Men's Health Crisis and tri-state service organizations.

To donate online, go to Aidswalk.net; or you can donate by sending a check (made out to AWNY) to Paul at 185 English Place, Basking Ridge, NJ 07920.

Jersey City's Chillfest Film Series continues its sixth season at LITM in Jersey City on May 15th at 4 pm with a viewing of Making the Boys. This documentary explores the triumphs and struggles in making the landmark play and movie The Boys in the Band. Was it a groundbreaker? Did it reinforce gay stereotypes? Four decades later, the controversy still exists. For more information, or to order tickets, go to www.chillfest.org.

New Jersey's first SAGE - Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders - event will be taking place May 19th from 6 to 10 pm at the Hudson Pride Connections Center in Jersey City! This is the first in a series of r e g u l a r events that will be held at the Center in Jersey City.

Food and drink, bingo, and a dance

party with swing dance lessons are part of what's in store on the 19th, so hop on the PATH train to Journal Square for this big Northern New Jersey SAGE launch party!

Jersey Shore QSpot invites you all to a spectacular event being held down the shore! It's QSpot's 4th annual Pride Julibee Dinner Dance, being held on June 4th - the night before Jersey Pride - at the Riverview Pavilion in Belmar.

Tickets are $50 per person, and for those who want to stay late, there is a special rate for fooms at the Belmar Motor Lodge, located right next door to the Pavilion. It's a party you won't want to miss!

Each year, Garden State Equality's Legends dinner is a dazzling night of Hollywood, Broadway, and political stars.

This year, Legends will be held at the Jersey City Hyatt Regency hotel, located right on the Hudson River, on June 25th - the day before Gay Pride in New York City!

This year's lineup of guests includes Liz Callaway, Carol Leifer, Maureen McGovern, Denis O'Hare, Anthony Rapp, and honorees Barbra Casbar Siperstein, Reverend Bruce Davidson, and Representative Patrick Murphy (D-PA). All this, plus fine food and drink and a fabulous after-party, all overlooking the Manhattan skyline! For more information, or to purchase tickets, go to www.GardenStateEqualityorg.

This Month's Contributors Tony Puma: A career in sales/marketing/advertising and public relations influences his poetry style: less abstract and more to-the-point. Degrees from New York University and Fairleigh Dickinson University. A member of various poetry groups including Italian-American Writers Association, Red Wheel Barrow Poets, Paulinskill Poetry Project, Poets House (NYC), South Mountain Poets, and Hudson Valley Poets-onthe-Loose. A view of life through the prism of poetry; seeing, hearing, and feeling, trying to capture emotions and relate them via words. (p. 8) Bill Realman Stella writes Dancing to Architecture because writing about music is like that. He hosted the eclectic pop music show Highest Common Denominator in his mind for twenty years before getting it on the radio for six, and will host it again. Bill has been collecting music since age 4, when for each song he'd hear on the radio, he'd ask his mom, "Do they have a record?"

Making a record good enough to play on the radio remains a small miracle after all these years. If you'd like Bill to write, DJ, or promote for you, get in touch. Comments and suggestions a l s o w e lcome. Please send your c o r r e s p o ndences to bearealman @ gmail.com. (p. 9)

Page 4 CHALLENGE May 2011

Gleanings

Queer news from around the world Gleaned by Allen Neuner A New Jersey lawsuit could break new ground in defining gender for legal purposes El'Jai Devoureau was fired from his job watching men urinate into plastic cups at a drug treatment center because his employer stated the job required a male employee Mr. Devoureau, who is considered male by the State of Georgia, New Jersey's Motor Vehicle Commission, and Social Security, says he was discriminated against because of his transgender status. (New York Times) The man accused of initiating the chain of events leading to the death of Ridgewood native Tyler Clementi has been indicted on 15 counts by a Middlesex County grand jury.

Dharun Ravi, 19, of Plainsboro was charged with two counts of invasion of privacy, four counts of bias intimidation, two counts of attempted invasion of privacy, three counts of tampering with physical evidence, three counts of hindering apprehension or prosecution, and one count of witness tampering. (RidgewoodPatch.com) Bergen County Democrats chose Maywood Mayor Tim Eustace to be the party's candidate for the state Assembly in the newly-configured 38th District, instead of Jeff Gardner of Hawthorne. This marks the first time in New Jersey history that a race for the state legislature within the Democratic party came down to two openly gay candidates. (BlueJersey.com) The federal government suspended efforts to deport gay and lesbian foreign nationals legally married to same-sex U.S. spouses, only to walk back the announcement the following day. Immigration officials said they would continue to follow current law, which forbids the federal government from recognizing the marriages of same-sex couples.

Meanwhile, the Uniting American Families Act was reintroduced in Congress. The bill would include same-sex couples in immigration rules that allow U.S. citizens to sponsor family members for naturalization. Also, 48 members of Congress co-signed a letter to the Obama administration asking for a halt to deportations of same-sex partners of U.S. citizens. (Metro Weekly, DC; Advocate.com) Top Pentagon officials testifying before the House Armed Services personnel subcommittee said that "don't ask, don't tell" repeal training could sufficiently be complete by midsummer. The completion of training is the last hurdle to issuing the certification required to complete repeal of the policy. (Washington Blade) A contract between Congress and the law firm of King & Spalding forbids the firm's employees from advocating for a repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act. King & Spalding partner Paul Clement has been retained to defend DOMA on behalf of Congress in federal court, at an hourly rate of $520. (Metro Weekly, Washington) The Institutes of Medicine released an unprecedented report on LGBT health calling on the federal government to collect data about the U.S. LGBT population using federally funded surveys conducted by the Department of Health and Human Services. "I am delighted that after years of advocating for more attention to LGBT health disparities, IOM's

report will bring us closer to the goal of promoting good health for all Americans," said Representative Tammy Baldwin (D-WI). (Metro Weekly, DC) Arizona Governor Jan Brewer (R) signed into law a new adoption bill that gives preference to married couples when all other criteria are equal. The bill applies to both state and private adoption agencies. Brewer also signed a bill preventing the state Board of Nursing from regulating abortion, effectively prohibiting nurse practitioners from performing them. (Arizona Republic, Phoenix) The Arkansas Supreme Court has ruled that a blanket ban on adoptions by unmarried couples is unconstitutional, calling the law an invasion of privacy. Mississippi and Utah still have similar laws on the books. The ban's supporters in Arkansas are now considering launching a drive to amend the state's constitution to reinstate it. (KATV-TV, Little Rock) A bill that would require California public school's social science textbooks to include information about the historical contributions of LGBT Americans faces opposition from some religious groups. The measure has won support, however, from the California Teachers Association and the Los Angeles Unified School District. The bill's sponsor, openly gay Senator Mark Leno (D), said the bill is intended to provide role models for LGBT youth and help others understand the community's place in the history of California and the US. (Los Angeles Times) The Colorado House Judiciary Committee voted to kill a civil unions bill, despite testimony from openly gay Representative Mark Ferrandino (D), the bill's co-sponsor. All six Republicans on the committee voted against the bill.

"What makes me saddest is there were people on that committee who were, I think, supportive in their hearts but weren't willing to stand up against the leadership and the far-right fringe of their party," Ferrandino said. (Denver Post) Delaware Governor Jack Markell (D) said he will sign a civil unions bill passed by the state legislature giving gay and lesbian couples the same rights the state grants to married couples. The measure would go into effect Jan. 1, 2012.

(News Journal, New Castle) Commissioners in Orange County, FL are set to add health and other benefits to domestic partners and children of LGBT workers. The move follows the passage last fall of a measure that prohibited discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity in local workplaces. (Orlando Sentinel) Hawaii's House of Representatives passed a bill codifying protections against discrimination in employment based on gender expression. The bill now heads to Governor Neil Abercombie (D) for his signature. Hawaii already forbids discrimination against transgender individuals in housing and public accommodations. (Honolulu Star-Advertiser) The Illinois Senate's Executive Committee defeated by one vote a bill ensuring faith-based groups could turn down gays (continued on page 8)

May 2011 CHALLENGE Page 5

May 2011 Calendar

Recurring Contact Information

* Hackensack Peer Support Groups: 800-508-7577; www.njbuddies.org † Pride Center, Highland Park: 732-846-2232; www.pridecenter.org ‡ Hudson Pride Connections Center: 201-963-4779; HudsonPride.org λ LGBT Center Rainbow Lounge, Princeton: www.princeton.edu/lgbt ♦ Jersey Shore Q-Spot, Asbury Park: www.jsqspot.org Monday – Friday 9:00 am to 1:00 pm - HIV testing, Asbury Park; 800-947-0020 9:00 am to 11:00 am - The Daily Grind coffeehouse, Princetonλ 10:00 am to 5:00 pm - HiTOPS Health Center, Princeton; www.hitops.org; 609-683-5155 x 211 Every Monday 10:30 am - The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info @ hyacinth.org 7:00 pm - GAAMC, Morristown (see page 2) 7:00 pm - Bowling, Union; merenl @ comcast.net 7:30 pm - S.E.L.F. HIV Men’s support group, Hackensack* 7:30 pm - New Jersey Gay Men’s Chorus choir practice, Princeton; 609-396-7774; www.njgmc.org 7:30 pm - Overeaters Anonymous, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Stitch n B*tch, Highland Park† 8:00 pm - Bowling, Green Brook; 732-388-3548; qcrollers @ aol.com Every Tuesday 12:30 pm - The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info @ hyacinth.org 3:00 pm - Youth Connect, Jersey City‡ 4:00 pm - Treatment Adherence Support Group, Jersey City; 201-432-1134; info @ hyacinth.org 6:00 pm - Transview, Jersey City‡ 7:30 pm - Tuesday Night Lesbian Connection, Bound Brook; 908-791-3764 7:30 pm - Men’s HIV support group, Asbury Park; 732-7755084; apstillpoz @ yahoo.com 7:30 pm - Positive Yoga, Hackensack* 8:45 pm - Bowling, Belleville; 973-256-5936; NJGLB @ aol.com 9:00 pm - Bowling, Jersey City; 201-933-6028; JoeyNJ @ aol.com 9:15 pm - Bowling, Edison; 732-548-4550; cnjgbl @ yahoo.com 01 Sun 11:30 am - New Jersey AIDS Walk (see Bulletin Board, pg. 3) 1:00 pm - Rainbow Book Group, Jersey City‡ 4:00 pm - Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-857-4040; Dignitymetronj @ msn.com 6:30 pm - Gay Men’s Opera Club; 732-249-9034; hagol @ msn.com 02 Mon 7:00 pm - Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero AT umdnj.edu 7:00 pm - Lesbian Hot Topics, Jersey Shore Q-Spot♦ 8:00 pm - A Night Out, Highland Park† 03 Tue 4:00 pm - HIV Testing & Needle Exchange, Jersey City‡ 6:00 pm - Gay Pride Business Network, New Brunswick; www.gpbn.net 7:00 pm - ComeOUT & Play, Highland Park† 7:00 pm - Quesdays, Jersey Shore Q-Spot♦ 7:00 pm - Sister Act, New York; www.meetup.com/NorthJersey-Primetimers 7:30 pm - LGBT Fellowship, Belleville; 973-751-0616

Every Wednesday 10:30 am - The Wellness Community, Jersey City; 201-4321134; info @ hyacinth.org 2:00 pm - "Generation Q", WRSU 88.7 FM; wrsu.org 3:00 pm - Youth Connect, Jersey City‡ 6:00 pm - Positive People peer support group, Hackensack* 7:30 pm - Men’s Living Out group, Highland Park; njwarrior @ aol.com† 7:30 pm - Gay Men’s Coming Out group, Highland Park; pdumpert @ gmail.com† Every Thursday 11:30 am - Living Beyond, Jersey City‡ 6:00 pm - Pride Thursdays, Hard Grove Cafe Bar, Jersey City; jclgo.org 6:00 pm - Our Youth weekly support group, Jersey City; www.myspace.com/our_youth 6:30 pm - Double Jeopardy peer support group, Hackensack* 6:30 pm - Living Beyond HIV Men's peer support groups, Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm - C.R.A.V.E., Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm - Sexual Assault Survivor Support, Princeton; www.hitops.org 7:30 pm - Rainbows on Cleveland Street, Orange; 973-2565936; rbowsoncleveland @ aol.com 7:30 pm - Writers group, Highland Park† Every Friday 3:00 pm - Youth Connect, Jersey City‡ Every Sunday 10:30 am - MCC of Christ the Liberator, North Brunswick; 732-846-8227; mccliberator @ excite.com Noon - St. Francis of Assisi Church, Glen Ridge; 973-7317765; stfrancisnj.org 2:30 pm - Liberation in Truth Unity Fellowship Church, Newark; 973-621-2100

04 Wed 6:00 pm - North Jersey Prime Timers' monthly meetup, Little Falls; www.meetup.com/North-Jersey-Primetimers 7:30 pm - Gay Dad’s discussion group, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Catfight, Boonton (see Bulletin Board, pg. 3) 05 Thu Noon - Booked for Lunch, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Coffee Night, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com 7:30 pm - Best Practices for Summer Exercise, Highland Park† 06 Fri 7:00 pm - Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 7:00 pm - Under the Rainbow, Highland Park† 7:00 pm - Karaoke Party, Highland Park† 8:00 pm - I Hate Hamlet, Morristown; www.meetup.com/ North-Jersey-Primetimers 07 Sat 2:00 pm - Lavender Graduation, Princetonλ 2:30 pm - First and Third for GLBTI youth, Princeton; 609683-5155; www.HiTOPS.org

Page 6 CHALLENGE May 2011 07 Sat 6:00 pm - Game Night, Newark; www.meetup.com/NorthJersey-Primetimers 08 Sun 4:00 pm - Chillfest, Jersey City (see Bulletin Board, pg. 3) 6:00 pm - Gay Men’s Classical Song Club, Kingston; pbrown02 @ worldnet.att.net 09 Mon 7:00 pm - Youth Initiative Teenager's Meetings, Jersey Shore Q-Spot♦ 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Morris County, Mendham; 973-7275288; pflag.morris @ verizon.net 7:30 pm - PFLAG, Princeton; 609-663-5155; www.pflagprinceton.org 10 Tue 7:30 pm - Bisexual Social Support Group, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - PCNJ Board of Trustees meeting, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Yoga for Men, Highland Park† 8:00 pm - Men's Social Night, Highland Park† 11 Wed 6:00 pm - Gay Pride Business Network, Asbury Park; www.gpbn.net 7:30 pm - TGLCA monthly meeting, Trenton; 609-396-9788; tglca @ aol.com 9:00 pm - Dine with Pride, Metuchen ; jennifer.horsey @ cit.com 12 Thu 6:30 pm - Volunteer orientation, Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm - Qspot Book Club, Jersey Shore Q-Spot♦ 7:30 pm - PFLAG of North Jersey, South Orange; 908-7897489; pflagwaver @ aol.com 7:30 pm - Alternate Thursdays, Montclair; kjdinkin @ comcast.net 13 Fri 7:30 pm - Dowsing for Expanded Awareness, Highland Park† 14 Sat 11:00 am - Our Youth Teen Health Fair, Jersey City; www.ouryouthnj.org 1:00 pm - Youth Drop-In, Highland Park† 2:00 pm - Parents Day at Turtleback Zoo, West Orange; www.rainbowfamiliesnj.org 7:30 pm - Dignity New Brunswick gay Catholic liturgy; 732968-9263; dignitynb @ earthlink.net 15 Sun 4:00 pm - Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-837-4040; Dignitymetronj @ msn.com 4:00 pm - TrueSelves trans support group, Highland Park† 4:30 pm - Torah Queeries, Highland Park† 16 Mon 7:00 pm - Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero @ umdnj.edu 7:00 pm - Lesbian Hot Topics, Jersey Shore Q-Spot♦ 7:30 pm - Vegetable Gardening (with & without a yard), Highland Park† 8:00 pm - LGBT Activist Forum, Highland Park† 17 Tue 4:00 pm - HIV Testing & Needle Exchange, Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm - ComeOUT & Play, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Lesbian Alliance of Princeton; 609-924-8174; Loisj @ msn.com 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Hunterdon County, Flemington; 908-7521370; pflaghc @ yahoo.com 8:00 pm - PFLAG of Bergen County, Paramus; 201-2870318; www.bergenpflag.org

8:00 pm - NJ Women, Secaucus; info @ njwomen.org 18 Wed 7:30 pm - United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez @ comcast.net 7:30 pm - Chilltown open mic night, Jersey City‡ 7:30 pm - Catfight, Boonton (see Bulletin Board, pg. 3) 8:00 pm - Havurah board meeting, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com 19 Thu 6:00 pm - SAGE launch party, Jersey City‡ (see Bulletin Board, pg. 3) 7:00 pm - GAAMC board meeting, Morristown; all GAAMC members are invited to attend.

7:00 pm - GLSEN Training, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - NJ Women Coming Out Support Group, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Northwest NJ, Sparta; 973-729-9909 20 Fri 7:00 pm - Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 7:00 pm - NJ Furries Art Workshop, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Support Group for Parents of LGBTIQ Youth/Young Adults, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Dignity New Brunswick social; 732-968-9263; dignitynb @ earthlink.net 8:00 pm - Out of the Box open mic night, Highland Park (signup begins 7:30); outoftheboxinfo @ mac.com 8:00 pm - Shabbat service; njlgh.onefireplace.com 21 Sat 2:30 pm - First and Third for GLBTI youth, Princeton; 609683-5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:00 pm - Rainbow Bowling, Bradley Beach; 732-774-4540 7:00 pm - NJ Gay Film Society & Potluck Dinner Club, location TBA; gayfilms @ bigfoot.com 7:30 pm - Catfight Finale, Boonton (see Bulletin Board, pg. 3) 22 Sun 11:00 am - Community Awareness Day, Highland Park† Noon - NJ Havurah planning meeting; njlgh.onefireplace.com 7:30 pm - Opera Appreciation 101, Highland Park† 23 Mon 6:30 pm - Dinner, Newark; www.meetup.com/North-JerseyPrimetimers 24 Tue 3:00 pm - Health Center Drop-In, Princetonλ 7:30 pm - Yoga for Men, Highland Park† 8:00 pm - Lesbians and Gay Men of New Brunswick, Highland Park† 25 Wed 6:00 pm - Gay Pride Business Network, Asbury Park; www.gpbn.net 6:00 pm - Queering the Color Line Family Dinner, Princetonλ 27 Fri 7:00 pm - Rock Hero, Highland Park† 28 Sat 1:00 pm - Youth Drop-In, Highland Park† 2:00 pm - Youth Support Group, Highland Park† 7:00 pm - Gay Bowling, Asbury Lanes, Asbury Park; 732-7766160 7:00 pm - Games Night & Dessert Party, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Men's Potluck Dinner, Highland Park† 30 Mon 8:30 pm - Meditation Group, Highland Park†

May 2011 CHALLENGE Page 7

We've Improved Your Membership!

If you haven't been to GAAMC recently, you'll find something extra enclosed with your copy of this month's Challenge. It's something we haven't offered in many years — your very own GAAMC Membership Card!

GAAMC has switched its membership policy to make all memberships expire 365 days after you join or renew, thus ensuring that all members get the same length of membership for their dues. On your membership card, you'll find your new renewal date — a reminder for you, and a way for us to keep track of whose memberships need to be renewed. The cards also include, on the back, a description of what GAAMC is and what it does, and on the front, as a nod to our history, the cards depict the original GAAMC logo. So if you've ever wanted to be a "card-carrying member" of anything, your dreams will come true with your new GAAMC Membership Card!

FRAME OF REFERENCE

by Tony Puma

You see, I have a painting on my wall, in an elaborate frame.

Every other day, I set the painting right.

KEVIN P. SUSZKO, PC Certified Public Accountant

-TAX PLANNING & PREPARATION -FINANCIAL PLANNING -ACCOUNTING SERVICES -DAY & EVENING APPOINTMENTS -OFFICES IN NEW JERSEY & NYC Phone: 973–376–4121 P. O. Box 701 Short Hills, NJ 07078 E-Mail: KPSCPA@GMAIL.COM

It must be the building’s vibrations that move it off-center.

Now, I can remedy that, (I think) by taping the bottom of the frame to the wall.

I thought about this the other day.

Then; What if I remedied the ‘problem’?

Part of my waking routine would be thrown off-kilter.

Maybe, I am condemned to perform this silly function by the gods for some grievous trespass.

Am I like Sisyphus, condemned to push a boulder up hill, eternally.

Camus thought Sisyphus cheated the gods, by being mortal.

That self esteem is a work-related ethos.

Maybe I am also cheating the gods.

I enjoy the work.

Puma/MMXI ©

Getting Personal Large selection of male porn video tapes (VHS format) for sale, individually or in lots. For more information, please contact James at 973 482-0632.

Seeking employment in the field of development/fund-raising.

Experienced professional looking for work in the Somerville area or in Manhattan.

Contact Allen at 908-252-9303.

I saw you at Tiki Bob's. You grabbed my butt and I told you if you did that again I'd kill you. You did. I need your address now. Phone 235-8134.

Page 8 CHALLENGE May 2011

Gleanings

(continued from page 4) and lesbians looking to become adoptive or foster parents.

After the vote, a spokesman for the Catholic Conference of Illinois suggested that Catholic charities that provide adoption and foster care services in the state might have to shut down. (Chicago Tribune) Indiana's Senate shot down a proposal to delete a ban on civil unions from a proposed constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage. This clears the way for a final Senate vote on the amendment, which if approved would have to wait until 2013 or 2014 to be put to the voters. (WIBCFM, Indianapolis) The Maryland Senate unexpectedly voted to send a transgender rights bill back to committee rather than vote on the measure in the final hours of the legislative session. A number of Democrats who had promised to support the Gender Identity Anti-Discrimination Act, passed earlier by the House of Delegates, ended up voting to recommit it to a Senate committee, effectively killing its chances of passage this year. (Washington (DC) Blade) Nevada's Senate Commerce and Labor Committee voted to send bills banning discrimination based on gender identity and expression in public accommodations and housing to the full Senate for a vote. A separate bill that would outlaw employment discrimination against transgender people has passed the Assembly and now heads to the Senate, where it is expected to pass. (Las Vegas Review-Journal) A South Carolina gay man, whose beating was caught on a convenience store video surveillance tape, has been interviewed by FBI agents who want to determine if he was the victim of a hate crime under federal law. The incident has state lawmakers and a statewide LGBT group calling for the passage of a state hate crimes law, but Governor Nikki Haley (R) said she does not support the effort. (Charlotte (NC) Observer) Tennessee's Senate Education Committee approved a bill containing an amendment which will prohibit teachers from discussing homosexuality in kindergarten through eighthgrade classrooms. The amendment's sponsor, Senator Stacey Campfield (R) contends homosexuality is being discussed in classrooms, although spokesmen from the state Board of Education and the state Department of Education told the committee they are unaware of any such activity. (Knoxville News-Sentinel) Texas laws criminalizing gay sex remain in the state's penal code, even though they are unenforceable, a situation some say creates the potential for abuse. Representative Wayne Christian (R) says leaving the laws on the books "better reflects the views of a lot of citizens," saying he'd be hesitant to change them. (Houston Chronicle) Virginia's State Board of Social Services voted to continue practices that allow faith-based organizations in Virginia to discriminate in adoptions. The 7 to 2 vote came after many faith-based groups and adoption agencies insisted they be allowed to screen prospective parents on religious or moral beliefs. (Washington Post)

The Washington state legislature approved a bill that would allow the state to recognize legally married same-sex couples under the state's domestic partner statute. The bill will now head to the governor's desk for final approval. (Seattle Times) Hungarian lawmakers approved a new constitution which includes a ban on gay marriage and protection of the life of a fetus from conception. The new constitution also includes a ban on discrimination, but the ban does not mention age or sexual orientation. (Associated Press) Italian Member of Parliament Paola Concia, who is openly lesbian, was subject to anti-gay harassment while walking with her partner in Rome. A passerby shouted obscenities at the couple, adding "they should have sent you to the ovens," according to Concia. Few on the street came to their aid, but national politicians have since condemned the incident.

(Adnkronos International) The American Civil Liberties Union has sent letters to numerous school districts telling them to cease blocking websites with LGBT content. Some school districts have said that technical problems caused the inadvertent blocking of certain sites. It's important that LGBT students are able to access information at school, especially if they do not enjoy a supportive environment at home, said Joshua Block, an ACLU staff attorney. (Wall Street Journal) The American Family Association is bankrolling events in at least 14 states that have already trained almost 10,000 pastors to get their flocks more involved in socially conservative political causes, such as marriage and abortion issues. Planners say they hope these efforts will reinvigorate the religious right as a force in national politics. (New York Times) The Log Cabin Republicans (LCR) blasted the Republican National Committee for its website attacking President Obama on GLBT issues. The site has a page faulting the president for repealing "don't ask, don't tell," opposing California's Proposition 8, expanding government recognition of same-sex couples, and dropping the administration's legal defense of the Defense of Marriage Act. "This is not in line with the conversations we have had with the Chairman's office," said Christian Berle, LCR's deputy executive director. (Metro Weekly, DC) National Basketball Association Commissioner David Stern fined Los Angeles Lakers player Kobe Bryant $100,000 after Bryant was caught on camera using an anti-gay slur in anger over a technical foul. Bryant later said his words were not meant to offend anyone, but Stern said such language was unacceptable. Openly gay former NBA player John Amaechi said he wasn't surprised to learn of Bryant's use of the slur, saying, "This is common language when I played. It was an everyday word that I heard." (New York Times)

Lesbian Fiction/Romance ISBN: 978-1-935053-44-6 Format: Trade Paper, 176 pages Cover Price: $15.95 Publication Date: March 2011 www.regalcrest.biz www.rhanel.com

May 2011 CHALLENGE Page 9

Dancing to Architecture™

Music Reviews & News with a Queer ear

by Bill Realman Stella Last month was a column of mainstream music and musicians reaching to be included in the mainstream. This month, let's call it: The Pop Charts Re-imagined — A Place For Greatness.

Sounds not-so-far-out, but few if any of the albums to follow will spawn Top 40 hits. That is, except for at the Highest Common Denominator radio station in my head'n'heart, filled to overflowing with a These Could All Be Hits If You'd Just Let Them Work Their Magic On You format, mixing shiny happy songs with those musical moments that merely stop you in your tracks.

Songs the singer hasn't written, were popularized by other singers, are now given the new singer's characteristic imprint and a fresh take. Recent decades brought us an explosion of great songs that don't fit the needs of most Pop and Jazz song interpreters, so it's sad this kind of covers album is so rare. Personal favorite deep cut "State of Independence" (originally sung by Donna Summer, written

by Jon Anderson of Yes) gets treated beautifully, as does John Lennon's "No. 9 Dream", Nilsson's "Lifeline" and Blue Nile's "Tinseltown In The Rain". Let's celebrate Lifelines while it's here.

Architecture In Helsinki ~ Moment Bends

They're an award-nominated, chart topping band in Australia. But here, where Architecture in Helsinki's "That Beep" should be an instant hit on iTunes and in heavy rotation Radio Disney, it's not happening, and it won't happen — more the shame of our "system" for hit Paul Simon ~ So Beautiful Or So What making. Kellie Sutherland's effortlessly sexy Eventually, all your musical heroes will and innocent vocal sticks to the roof of a redie. Whether you get to survive to see it or strained synth palate, as the song's cool texnot, once you've tasted the bitter shock of ture encourages you to keep dancing. Cool, the sudden death of an artist, someone you restrained, but not minimalist: WTF details only know because they brought you untold clamber over every moments of joy, it's surface, including lyrbetter you learn fast: ™ L'IL BOX OF CONCERTS ics. The kicker: Every note from those "Dressed up as bubble you love is precious.

MARTIN SWINGER gum / I'm stuck to your Bummer? No. If you've M O O N CD release party shoe. / Let's run." not gotten that far To benefit ArtsCAP! "Contact High" holds down the cool-fort, along, better you hear it from me. Cherish your May 6, 7 PM washed in chirpy synths and a finger-popping relationships with the creators of the songs you Synaxis Bar 660 stride that steals Michael Jackson's "Billie love like you cherish distant family). It's not 660 Cookman Ave, Asbury Park, NJ Jean" attitude and Prince's falsetto style. "Esgood to keep those who create what gives so $15. "GREAT MUSIC and prizes!" capee" invites your hips to a new reality. Any much meaning to your life at a safe emotional track that calls itself "W.O.W." better be good distance. You may never meet them, but you BOWLING FOR SOUP enough to walk on water. and Walking On Washould recognize their value BEFORE they go.

Purveyors of the 2005 classic "I'm Gay" ter is what WOW stands for. "Yr Go To" picks up Paul Simon so far as I know never went through and hits like "1985" and "High School Never the pace, with tubular bells, mandolin-speed rehab, raced cars, or took many now-cliched ceEnds" play a rare small venue. echo-y guitar and piano flourishes of such style lebrity risks. He's managed to survive and create The Wonder Bar in Asbury Park, May 17. and taste not heard in ages. so consistently he's become taken for granted. But (Get yr tix now b4 the inevitable sell-out!) Their previous album, Places Like This, arrived man, I appreciate the fuck out of him. Here we Doors open 7 PM, with 3 special opening wrapped in a hyper-kinetic cartoon construct of are, 50 years after he began making hit records, bands. $15 advance, @ door (if any): $18. an album cover. The super-cool blue high-speed and he continues to make great music. still shot chosen for the cover art of Moment So Beautiful Or So What requires no hyperbole.

BIG FREEDIA Bends hints at change. Before: AIH was a quirky This is not the best album since Blahbedy Blah, May 26, Mercury Lounge, NYC, NY tribal electro-jam boogie band. Now: You're and chances are it won't spawn a Top 40 single.

May 28, Brooklyn Bowl, Brooklyn, NY invited to AIH's electro-punk-sleek party salon But damn! If it doesn't give up its beauties pricefor close-quarters contact dancing. This is my lessly! He tosses off gems as if they were just CHRISTINE MARTUCCI idea of all-day dance music. trinkets. Every harmonic seems bathed in grace, You Gotta See Her To Believe. every song is knitted by a shimmery texture, like Apr 29, doors 7 PM The Go! Team ~ Rolling Blackouts sunshine dancing on broad river waters.

The Wonder Bar, Asbury Park, NJ Why the HELL doess everyone act too cool for "Waiting For Christmas Day" came out late last June 4, doors 7PM The Go! Team's school?! Effusive, practically year, like a gift, or a teaser of the album to Pride at The Pony, ebullient, they top my list of bands I believe come. (It was included among the notable songs The Stone Pony, Asbury Park, NJ should be wildly popular but don't get much not on albums in my Best of 2010 list). The curbuzz. Me, I can't imagine better schoolmates. rent feature track garnering the most airplay is ARCHITECTURE lN HELSINKI What do they sound like? A crowd of fans of "Aftermath", and it's as though Simon wanted to June 16 The Go-Go's, The Byrds, and the Phil Spectorrevisit his title track from Graceland, focusing on Webster Hall, New York produced Ronettes collide cheerfully, like a the lyric "The Mississippi delta was shining like a massive beautiful kinetic pep squad. They go on National guitar." "Aftermath" shines until gleamholiday together, partners are swapped, babies ing — it shimmers. In its glow you can hear it evoke Bo Diddley and are produced, statues are raised in their honor. Schoolkids become the conga-influenced Second Line of New Orleans funerals. enamored by their sound, and overdub illicit cheerleader rap and the Others have observed and I will too that the themes of god and funkiest marching band ever using Spector's methods. In other words: spirituality course through So Beautiful, leaving "Aha!"'s in its wake.

Like great fun! As did their prior albums, Rolling Blackout gives my brain nipple tweaks.

Andrea Corr ~ Lifelines Extra Credit points earned for celebrating "Buy Nothing Day" What could be more surprising to my ears (ears that distrust mel(a.k.a. Black Friday or the day after Thanksgiving). And this low music first and rarely ask The-Mellow to explain itself later) month's award for "Song Title Most Deserving of a Song (Finally!)" than to find one of the co-leaders of the Irish Folk Rock band The goes to "Ready To Go Steady".

Corrs releasing an album covering some of her favorite songs, and Hear an introductory 8-song playlist of some of their career-best have it be the most pleasurable album at www.thegoteam.co.uk of its kind in recent memory. Lifelines Dancing To Architecture® contents ©2011 Bill isn't yet-another-version of chestnuts Stella. ©, ® & ™ items included in the column for review purposes are ©, ® & ™ their respective from the American Standards Songowners. book. Once common, it's now a rarity: SPECIAL EXPANDED DANCING TO ARCHITECTURE COMING ONLINE MAY 2011 CHALLENGE "DTA Special" at ISSUU.COM/GAAMC/ Features: Out Music by MARTIN SWINGER, ARI GOLD, TOM GOSS and JILL SOBULE & JOHN DOE, World Beat by LES NUBIANS, New Jersey Ex-pats WORLD/ INFERNO FRIENDSHIP SOCIETY and GEOFF BAKER, Visionary TUNE-YARDS, Songwriters LUCINDA WILLIAMS, BELL X1 and ANTHONY DAVID, Euro-classical Composer JENNIFER HIGDON, MORE about ARCHITECTURE IN HELSINKI, the equally shiny, happy and city name-dropping I'M FROM BARCELONA, and New Rock from bands DEVOTCHKA, BEADY EYE and R.E.M.

Page 10 CHALLENGE May 2011

GAY ACTIVIST ALLIANCE IN MORRIS COUNTY

Officers President.................................................. Mickey Suiter ....................................... President @ GAAMC.org VP Community Services........................................... Open.............................................. Info @ GAAMC.org VP Operations...................................................... Open Secretary .................................................. Gordon Sauer ....................................... Secretary @ GAAMC.org Treasurer ................................................... Andy Skurna....................................... Treasurer @ GAAMC.org Trustees Kerry Dinkin, Marty Grifone, Claire Pompei, Mitch Rubin, Ed Schell, Bill Realman Stella, Alexa Vasios Trustees Emeriti Sue Harris, Sherri Rase, Robin Schneider, Mark Wydner Committee Chairs Activism................................................... Gordon Sauer ........................................ Activism @ GAAMC.org Archives....................................................Mickey Suiter ........................................ Archives @ GAAMC.org Discussion Group Resources............................ Gordon Sauer ..................................... Discussions @ GAAMC.org Fundraising................................................. Andy Skurna..................................... Fundraising @ GAAMC.org Information..................................................Mitch Rubin..................................... FreeLibrary @ GAAMC.org Member Services/Front Desk........................... Allen Neuner Membership ................................................ Andy Skurna................................... Memberships @ GAAMC.org Pride Guide................................................. Andy Skurna......................................PrideGuide @ GAAMC.org Programs..................................................... Sherri Rase........................................ Programs @ GAAMC.org Public Relations............................................. Sherri Rase.............................................. Info @ GAAMC.org Socials................................................... Charlie Murphy........................................... Socials @ GAAMC.org Speakers Bureau........................................... Chris Selitto................................ SpeakersBureau @ GAAMC.org Volunteerism.................................................Sherri Rase....................................... Volunteer @ GAAMC.org Webmaster (inc. Facebook, Issuu, Yahoo!) ............ Andy Skurna..................................... Webmaster @ GAAMC.org GAAMC, the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, has served New Jersey’s gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, and intersexed community since 1972. GAAMC is a not-for-profit volunteer-run organization that provides social, educational, and outreach programs. GAAMC also offers opportunities for individuals to become politically active on issues related to the GLBTI community. Our intent is to maintain a positive, healthy, respectful, and supportive environment in a safe space.

Meetings are held every Monday evening at the Morristown Unitarian Fellowship, 21 Normandy Heights Rd., Morristown, NJ (near the Morris Museum). Discussion groups usually meet from 7:00 to 8:00. The evening's program usually starts at 8:00 pm. Refreshments are available. For program information, call our information line or check our homepage (see below).

Members and non-members are always welcome.

Annual membership dues are: Regular, $40/single, $70/couple; Students/Seniors, $30/single, $60/couple.

Those looking to help out at GAAMC can contact the Volunteer Coordinator, Sherri Rase, at Volunteer @ GAAMC.org.

How to reach GAAMC Mail: PO Box 137, Convent Station, NJ 07961 Telephone: 973-285-1595 E-Mail: info @ gaamc.org Home page: http://www.gaamc.org Mail List: http://groups.yahoo.com/subscribe/gaamc Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/gaamc Challenge online edition: issuu.com/gaamc