The Courier 1251

www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 7 May 2012 Issue 1251 Free

BALLED OVER

Trashy novels

Bargain holiday reads you wont have to take back home

FASHION P.14-15

“I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time ”

page. 27

ird-year assaulted in ‘self defence’ • Th issued caution after •Attacker admitting beating up student

By Kat Bannon Editor

A vicious attack on a third-year Architecture student has shown just how vulnerable students can be in a city they consider safe.

At the end of January, 20-year-old Jack Allen suffered a brutal assault around the Bigg Market area, resulting in a broken cheekbone in three places and eight stitches across his nose.

His attacker, who admitted the beating, was issued with a caution.

Having no recollection of the actual incident, Jack’s first memory following the attack is waking up in hospital while receiving treatment on his injuries.

“I was still drunk and completely out of it. Then the next thing I remember was being at home with a terrible hangover and a note stating that I’d been beaten up, that I’d had this and that treatment and how I needed to go back to the hospital for the results of some scans.”

The next day he went to the police station to report the incident.

“I didn’t think there was any point in going as I knew I couldn’t remember anything, but it turned out he’d actually been arrested the same night I was attacked, as soon as it had happened.

“It was lucky I decided to go in the first place.”

The man held for the attack was released on bail until 4 March. Having no previous convictions he was issued a caution and the case was closed.

However, as of last Thursday he has now pleaded in self defence.

“I received a phone call from the police last week,” said Jack “they told me the guy said I’d been coming towards him threateningly, and he thought I might have been carrying a weapon.

“I accept I was far, far too drunk that night. It was the classic case of not needing that last drink.

“However I know I never, ever, would have done anything like that, no matter how drunk I was. I’ve never been in a fight before.

“There’s no way I would have sustained such injuries if it was just an act of self defence, it’s an absolute joke.

“I was definitely just in the wrong place at the wrong time. He probably thought oh, I’ll go for that little posh boy.”

There is no CCTV in the area where the attack took place.

Welfare and Equality Officer Katy Hargreaves commented: “No matter how safe you believe a city or where you live to be you always need to remember to stay vigilant, safety is in numbers and never get into a state where you are not able to get home safely.”

Third-year Architecture student Jack Allen with stitches and broken cheekbone a few days after he was assaulted on the Bigg Market

News

2

Monday 7 May 2012

News Editors: Wills Robinson and George Sandeman Online News Editor: Helen Lam courier.news@ncl.ac.uk

thecourieronline.co.uk/news

NEWS

CLEAN AND FAIR

Malaysian students take to the streets for election reform

SPIN IT TO WIN IT

NUDJ front-up against some of the nation’s best societies

6 7

COMMENT

£10,000 up for grabs in apptastic competition

By Johnny Farrar-Bell Whilst many were busy training for the arduous 26 mile London Marathon at the tail end of last term, an equally exciting and competitive event was taking place in the form of the Newcastle Appathon.

This was the idea of third-year Computer Engineering student Daniel Thompson, in collaboration with ViceChancellor Chris Brink.

The competition tasks competitors with the aim of designing an app which would ‘make your life easier on campus’.

There were 240 entries, and 3 winners, with a top prize of £1000. The judging panel consisted of an ISS representative,

A CHANGE TO PAYDAY Recent debate has challenged student loan instalments

SPORT

40 46

OLYMPICS PREVIEW

A look at the sports you might not know about

INTRA MURAL

Who made our Best XI?

NUSU President Laura Perry, representatives from the Computer Science Department, a Careers Service officer and members of the Entrepreneurs Society.

The top apps included one for better access to University societies called NCLspace which would notify users about current and upcoming society events.

Another one, myNCL, was described as a ‘University all-in-one app’ that would integrate the communication services used by the University, including email and blackboard, into one easy-to-use application.

But the winning offering was a unique Twitter-cum-FourSquare service called Campus Buzz which would “allow students, societies and anyone in the stu-

dent ecosystem to communicate with ease”.

The app would enable you to find about local events happening around you such as “knitting parties” and “free trampolining sessions”.

Thompson said he felt extremely positive about the entries in the first round and the ideas that were developed.

He noted how it was essential for the University to “stay on the cutting edge of technology” and that competitions such as the Appathon were a great way to do so.

However, he did comment on the current ecosystem of apps saying that a lot of applications on were a “bit trivial” pointing to examples such as Angry Birds.

He opined that perhaps more should

be developed for more practical use such as healthcare and banking.

Thompson also provided a note of caution saying: “This could all be a flash in the pan.” He noted worries that the apps concept could suffer the same fate of now extinct technological innovations such as minidisc players, HDDVD and the like.

But, despite these concerns, the prevailing opinion suggests that apps are here to stay for the near future at the very least.

With the second round underway and with a whopping £10,000 in prize money up for grabs, the incentive is clearly there for students to build even more ingenious and time saving, or perhaps even wasting, apps.

he system under which you and I got into Newcastle University is set to change.

Until now the system involved set quotas of students who were offered places below a certain grade, and certain numbers of ‘near misses’ (where a student misses their conditional offer by one or two grades) who were still offered a place.

However, under new plans the University will be allowed to admit as many students as it pleases who gain ABB, so long as they don’t ‘substantially alter overall student numbers.’ Surely this will undermine the academic quality here at Newcastle?

There are some courses at the University; Law, Medicine, Engineering, to name just a few, which offer almost entirely AAA or above.

Surely to let mere ABB’ers onto these courses would cause an immediate collapse of standards?

Seminars would be spent trying to explain the basics to idiots who couldn’t even manage a couple of A’s?

Well no, this The truth is our isn’t what’s goto happen, A level system ing and there are is so mired in two main reabureaucracy sons why.

The first of and so conwhich is that fused about our A-level its mission, system is so that when useless, so the University p a t h e t i c a l l y increases the unreliable at the number of ABB picking ‘best’ students students, none and awarding of us will be them the highest grades that able to tell it doesn’t accurately recognise potential.

An A-level examiners report from 2011 contained the following; ‘the reason why high ability students failed to achieve well on this paper…’ Surely the entire job of an Alevel examiner is to work out who the ‘high ability students’ are, and award them the best grades. But sadly this isn’t what happens. You may have read recently about ‘seminars’ which were being delivered by

chief examiners to school-teachers, where school-teachers who had paid hundreds of pounds to attend were told what questions would appear on what papers. The truth is our A level system is so mired in bureaucracy and so confused about its mission, that when the University increases the number of ABB students, none of us will be able to tell; standards certainly won’t fall.

The second reason it doesn’t matter, is because the University already lets in students who don’t achieve AAA onto AAA courses. In fact many of these students, who enter through ‘Partnership Schemes’, don’t even get ABB. Offers to these students, who often come from schools in under-privileged areas, can be below BBB. Yet they are here, they are in your seminars, and many of them are some of the brightest students here at Newcastle. Interestingly there is no consistent correlation between attainment at A-level and degree level.

The fact that there are already a number of students who did not achieve truly fantastic A-levels, at this University, fitting in and getting on with their degree and doing pretty well at it, surely shows that Alevels mean little when it comes to potential at university.

controls on places at individual universities that have been a barrier to competition. Students will gain as universities attract them by offering a high-quality academic experience.”

The changes have received a mixed reaction from university leaders. However, both the Russell Group, of which

Newcastle is a member, and University Alliance which counts Northumbria amongst its members, have welcomed the lifting of restrictions on student numbers.

More changes are being made to higher education policy. As reported in The Courier earlier this year, universities

planning to charge more than £7,500 were stripped of 20,000 places for students who achieved less than AAB. Universities charging less than this amount were then able to bid for the extra places.

This process will happen again in 2013, with 5,000 extra places available to universities charging less than £8,250.

12 Reforms aim to “put power in the hands of students” 13

SEX GAMES & HORSES Jack Torrance discusses the Gilliland scandal

The Courier

By Georgina Moule

The Government has announced that universities will be allowed to admit an unlimited amount of students who achieve ABB in their A Levels.

Currently, there is no limit on the number of students universities accept who achieve AAB, but from 2013 this is set to change, in a move government ministers hope will give more students the chance to go to their chosen university.

Universities UK, a group which represents universities across the country, has called for a period of stability before more changes are introduced due to the introduction of increased tuition fees from September this year. The group has also said it is vital that the changes do not end up reducing the overall number of students attending university.

Whilst the group has praised the opportunity for more students to attend their chosen university, Nicole Dandridge, Chief Executive of Universities UK said: “It is essential that these changes are financially sustainable and do not end up reducing overall student numbers in the sector.”

Sally Hunt, General Secretary of the University and College Union, has also raised concerns. She said: “It seems very premature for the government to extend its AAB policy when we have yet to see the impact of it. This looks like the triumph of ideology over evidence based policy-making.”

In spite of the criticism, Universities and Science Minister David Willetts said the reforms would put “choice and power in the hands of students.”

He added: “We are rolling back the

NUSU, King’s Walk, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE1 8QB. Tel: 0191 239 3940

The Courier is a weekly newspaper produced by students, for students. It’s never too late to get involved in the paper, whether you’re a writer, illustrator or photographer. Just visit thecourieronline.co.uk/getinvolved for more information.

JAKE UNSWORTH COMMENT

T

Editor Kat Bannon Deputy Editor Elliot Bentley News Editors Wills Robinson and George Sandeman Online News Editor Helen Lam Comment Editors Sophie McCoid and Susie May Beever Online Comment Editor Jack Torrance C2 Editor Aimee Philipson Lifestyle Editors Emma Balter, Ben Parkin and Lauren Stafford Online Lifestyle Editor Lauren Cordell Fashion Editor Victoria Mole Online Fashion Editor Rosanna Sopp Arts Editors Sally Priddle Online Arts Editor Lisa Bernhardt Film Editor Chris Binding Online Film Editor Hayley Hamilton Music Editors Ben Travis and Chris Scott Online Music Editor Graham Matthews Science Editor Mark Atwill Online Science Editor Shaun Butcher Sports Editors Colin Henrys, Harry Slavin and Rory Brigstock-Barron Online Sports Editors Grace Harvey and Charlie Scott Design Editors Gabe Mason and Tom O’Boyle Copy Editors Sarah Collings, Rachael Day, Dave Dodds, Rebecca Markham, Charley Monteith, Adam Rummens, Alice Sewell, Emily Symington, Marleen van Os, Emily Wheeler

The Courier is printed by: Print and Digital Associates, Fernleigh House, 10 Uttoxeter Road, Derby, Derbyshire, United Kingdom, DE3 0DA. Established in 1948, The Courier is the fully independent student newspaper of the Students’ Union at Newcastle University. The Courier is published weekly during term time, and is free of charge.

The design, text, photographs and graphics are copyright of The Courier and its individual contributors. No parts of this newspaper may be reproduced without the prior permission of the Editor. Any views expressed in this newspaper’s opinion pieces are those of the individual writing, and not of The Courier, the Students’ Union or Newcastle University.

The Courier

news.3

Monday 7 May 2012

First charity patronage for Eugenie

By David Hiscocks Princess Eugenie, currently in her third and final year studying English Literature and Politics, has launched a public charity appeal in her new role as patron

struction of new accommodation unit for visiting families of children receiving treatment. The planned building is set to be named the ‘Princess Eugenie House’.

“This appeal will provide state-of-theart facilities and equipment worthy of the hospital’s dedicated professionals

I am living proof that the Royal National Orthopaedic can and does transform lives

of the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital.

The sixth in the Royal line of succession, she has close connections with the institution as its surgeons helped her recover from scoliosis as a child of 12 with this her first charity patronage.

The disease forces the spine to curve and, speaking at the launch of the appeal, the youngest daughter of the Duke and Duchess of York said: “I am living proof that the hospital can and She has close does transform lives. Without the connections I received with the RNOH care at the Royal Naas it helped her tional Orthopaedic Hospital recover from scoliosis as a I wouldn’t look the way I do now, child of 12 my back would be hunched over”.

In addition to scoliosis, the RNOH treats a variety of diseases, including bone cancer.

The appeal is hoped to raise £15 million which will fund top-shelf facilities in a new hospital and include the con-

HELPING HAND

Eugenie York visits patients at the RNOH where once she had spent time receiving treatment for her scoliosis as a 12-year-old Photography: RNOH

and gives the 90,000 men, women and children the very best treatment and care.”

It is also hoped the fundraising will purchase two new £1 million MRI machines. This refurbishment is intended to cement the reputation of the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital as one of the three leading specialist centres in the world.

By lending her name to the appeal Princess Eugenie hopes to raise the public profile of the fundraising efforts as well as greaten her involvement in public life. “I am particularly proud to lend my name to this project as I have seen how important family support is for children undergoing prolonged and often traumatic treatment for lifethreatening conditions”.

The 22-year-old will also participate in the Nightrider event on 9 June to raise money for the RNOH. The 100 kilometre bike ride will take participants around several of London’s most famous landmarks.

Donations can be made via Virgin Money Giving -- http://uk.virginmoneygiving. com/EugenieYork

Do Medics have recipe to scramble Eggheads?

By Kat Bannon Editor Five fourth-year Medics have taken on the most formidable quiz team in the country, the Eggheads, in a bid for some quick cash.

At approximately this time last year, while nursing hangovers, Arthur Okonkwo, Matthew Alley, Liam Mcentee, Matthew Tuck and Jonny Hacking came to the conclusion that surely the swiftest way to make a bit of money was to win a game show.

So, having the time on their hands afforded by Medical degrees, they applied for everything from Take Me Out to Million Pound Drop and The Chase.

Although unable to reveal whether their theory was proved right or wrong in one respect, it did take a good few months before they received an interview from early evening quiz show Eggheads.

Never having been the most dedicated fans prior to the offer, they then committed themselves to watching it religiously every day. As the show is divided into five rounds, the first four on specific categories and the final on general knowledge, they gradually decided who would tackle which subject area based on their answers during their extensive television viewings.

However, they probably wish that they’d allowed for a far more vigorous application regime, given that it automatically allowed Liam to “blag” the spot in the final round, which was, according to Arthur, “a bit of a mistake”.

“He told us he was amazing at general

knowledge.

“At one point we tried to push him to take politics, but he was determined that he was only there to take part in the last round.”

For the other four, their knowledge was overlapping and diverse.

However, the interview process brought far more of their imagination to the test than their knowledge of geography or food and drink.

Given the question ‘Where would they go if they go back in time?’, Team Captain Matt Alley’s response was WWI and II, so he could help out with the war effort, in a medical sense. However, an answer didn’t come as easy for Matt Tuck, who, after lengthy hesitation and the comment “you’ve really sprung this on me” came to the conclusion that, as nothing that exciting had happened in his lifetime, he’d most like to go back to see the Queen’s Coronation.

For Liam the interrogation cut deeper.

Asked what items he would take to a desert island, his ipod was revealed as a firm favourite, as were sausages.

“Out of the four teams they interviewed we were definitely the worst there,” says Arthur, “we got through on charm.”

However, the others also believe it might have been down to Arthur’s interesting fact; that, as he owns a small plot of land, holds the authority of a Lord.

Speaking on the filming of the show, the five claim the Eggheads were, in their eyes, “exactly what you’d expect them to be like.

“CJ was a bit of a twat. Dermot was really nice though, really cool.

SPOONS AT THE READY

Medic students rub shoulders with the Eggheads on set Photography: Arthur Okonkwo

“Some bits of filming were pretty strange. When you go head-to-head with an Egghead you’re actually sat right next to each other, but you’re not allowed to look at them.

“It’s hard when you’re only a few inches away.”

Unfortunately, they are unable to give too much information until the episode hits our television screens.

“We definitely did better than I thought we would. I expected to get absolutely spanked. You’ll have to wait and see though,” said Alley.

The episode is to be aired on the 23 May. However, Arthur was keen to reassure readers that, should they miss it, it will be available on iplayer for seven days afterwards.

Continued the theme the two Matts

are also waiting to hear back from Million Pound Drop.

When the group was asked whether they would consider turning gameshow pro, their reaction was primarily one of uncertainty: “We think we might stick with our Medical degrees for the time being. You know, gain a bit more knowledge first.”

4.news

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

New lit-fest descends on Toon and beyond

By Matthew Sharp Award-winning authors descended on Newcastle this week to mark the launch of a brand new literary festival.

Entitled ‘The Festival of Belonging’, the weeklong event, organised by Newcastle’s Centre for Literary Arts (NCLA), drew authors such as Jackie Kay, author of Trumpet and Helen Oyeyemi, author of Icarus Girl and White is for Witching.

A variety of different events and sessions ran throughout the week both on campus at the Culture Lab and in several different venues across the city.

The new festival joins other established lit-fests in the region including those in Durham and Hexham.

Retro word and music collective, Trashed Organ, curated the event to bring together local musicians and linguists but also to celebrate the regions talent with Monday night’s menagerie of poets kicking off the festival with the theme of ‘We’re all mad here’.

In a city steeped in history, last Tuesday’s ‘Castle’s, Collieries and Coastlines’ exhibit allowed visitors to explore the region linguistically through the art of poetry, taking in its culture, history and natural heritage.

One of many workshops during the week included ‘A Long Way from Home’ with Tony Williams exploring the theme of distance and belonging; a relevant issue for many university students who have left home for the first time.

Williams, a lecturer at Northumbria University said: “Newcastle is a great city for literature and an event such as this just brings it all together”.

“Many people have a strong regional connection and even those who don’t have this northern connection enjoy the event”.

‘I Don’t Think We’ve Met’ was the theme for the final night with musicians, writers and artists further exploring the ideas of belonging and identity whilst giving visitors the chance to collaborate with new people.

The new festiMusic, provided val joins other by Fiona’s Jazz Express, enterestablished the crowd lit-fests in the tained to round-off the region includ- debut North-East ing those in fringe event.

But the main Durham and event at the weekHexham end encompassed two film screenings that took place at the Tyneside Cinema, adding much excitement to what had already been an enjoyable week.

‘Precious’ based on an adaptation of ‘Push’ was followed by a discussion with novelist Saphire and Professor Jackie Kay from Newcastle University.

The audience were further indulged with ‘I am Nasrine’, a coming-of-age drama set in Newcastle and Tehran, Iran that addressed various cross-culture issues.

WHERE I’M FROM

Workshops during the week included ‘a long way from home’ exploring the theme of distance and belonging; an issue for many students who have left home for the first time Photography: Sam Tyson

Want to have your say on a news story? Visit thecourieronline.co.uk

Edinburgh accused of English ‘cash cows’

By Jake Unsworth Edinburgh University has offered more places to English students than native Scots, leading to suggestions that the University is using non-Scottish students as ‘cash-cows’.

English students will pay £9,000 per year for four years to complete a de-

lish student numbers, compared to static figures for Northern Irish and Welsh recruits, is that there has been a degree of uncertainty over what fees Northern Irish and Welsh students will pay.

There had been the suggestion before Christmas that the Welsh Government was considering significant bursaries for Welsh students.

Whereas, the case of English students was definitive: a maximum of £9,000

Edinburgh University have increased offers to English students this year from 2,084 to 4,996 - a 140% intake increase gree north of the border whereas native Scots will have £5,278 contributed by the Scottish Government towards their fees.

It seems financially preferable for Scottish universities to recruit from England than from Scotland.

Edinburgh University have increased offers to English students from 2,084 to 4,996; a 140% rise.

It has increased its Scottish offers too, but by around 65%, a small increase by comparison.

However, the University only plans to increase numbers of academic staff by the normal yearly increase of 6.5% despite overall student offer increases of more than 100% (from around 5,000 to nearly 10,000 offers this year).

Concerns have been raised as to how such disparities in student staff ratios could impact the teaching quality and the University’s status; currently standing at 20 in the world.

Reasons for the rapid growth in Eng-

per year. The certainty of this income has been proposed as an explanation Edinburgh’s recent recruitment practices.

It also appears that Edinburgh, despite being the most extreme case of Concerns have its kind, is not been raised as alone with Glasgow University to how such increasing their disparities in English intake by student staff 10%. ratios could im- University does that it is pact the teach- stress to coming quality and trying pensate for what the University’s it believes will be a low take-up global status of offers among English students due to the fact a fouryear Scottish degree will cost £9,000 more than a three year course south of the border.

The Courier

news.5

Monday 7 May 2012

Dancers prove poles apart in ncl+ Awards

By Kat Bannon Editor It was the Pole Dancing Society that were the talk of this year’s ncl+ awards, scooping ‘Most Improved Society of the Year’ as President Harriet Slack was crowned joint-winner of ‘Society Officer of the Year.’

However, the spotlight shone brightest on final-year Combined Honours student Aimee Philipson, whose outstanding achievements in transforming both her Combined Honours course community and student media at Newcastle saw her presented with the ‘Vice-Chancellor’s Award for Outstanding Personal Achievement.’

Awarded only once previously, in 2010, this is a phenomenal achievement, only rivalled by the fact that it is also Aimee’s fourth consecutive ncl+ award.

Colin Bryson, Director of Combined Honours, who presented the award, expressed his delight that such an outstanding student has received the recognition she deserves: “From her very first week in Newcastle, Aimee has been tireless, ever-innovative and inspirational in what she has given her fellow students, the staff and the wider community. More than anybody else, Aimee has helped transform Combined Honours into a great community and really put us on the national map too. What is particularly amazing is the breadth and depth of roles and tasks she has taken on and delivered so brilliantly! I couldn’t ask for better role model. We are going to miss Aimee so, so much.”

In its fourth year of implementation, the ncl+ awards, a joint venture by the Students’ Union and University, celebrates and rewards the achievements of students and their extra-curricular and society activities.

Held this year at the Great North Museum, they recognize community-based work to entrepreneurial finesse, articulating the efforts and perseverance of the best of Newcastle’s students.

In the society-based awards, the coveted ‘Best Society of the Year’, presented by co-organiser, Activities Officer and crowd-pleaser of the evening Ania Kurek, was awarded to the Speech and Language Therapy Society, for their continued efforts in working to pro-

mote a nation-wide campaign.

Runner-up went to the ever professional, ever unstoppable NUTS, (Newcastle University Theatre Society), for their consistently high-quality productions, and meticulous organisation.

They were also represented by Tom Pope, Lead Director of Sweeny Todd and winner of the ‘Arts and Culture Award’ alongside runner-up Edward Byers for co-founding Cinema Politica Newcastle Circus Skills came a close runner-in the bid for ‘Most Improved Society of the Year.’ Commenting on the success of the winners, Pole Dancing, Ania said: “They have showed true passion and commitment to their society what with the numerous events they have put on.

I can honestly say they have bent over backwards this year and I expect even greater things for them in the future!”

Media and Communications was awarded to Deputy Editor of The Courier Elliot Bentley, responsible for the construction, maintenance and design of The Courier Online this year.

Runner-up was a much deserving Jonathan Anderson of NSR, whose technological flair has seen major improvements all year-round for the station in both output and campus presence.

The caliber of the student shortlists were exceptional enough in themselves to merit a rejig of the original prizes.

In the ‘Environmental Champion’ category, two runners-up and one overall winner was announced, shared between Betahan Daltry for her commitment to SCAN, Gongbao Wang for his involvement in international youth activities and Jade Wilkes for her hard work as President of the Conservation Society.

Similarly ‘Society Officer of the Year’ was presented to not one, but two winners. Alongside Harriet Slack, whose exceptional efforts and drive in changing the ingrained perceptions of pole dancing, Sam Steventon’s achievements in both the Comedy and Biology Society were rewarded.

In the ‘Contribution to Sport Development Award’ Hamish Adams-Cairns was announced runner-up for his contribution to charity fund raising in order to build the first ever Rwandan International Cricket Stadium. Overall winner fell to Claire Lynn for her overwhelming dedication to Gaelic football.

SIFE President Katie Griffiths was

FOR ME? AGAIN?

An overwhelmed Aimee Philipson receives her award for ‘Outstanding Perosnal Achievement’ Photography: Moises Bedrossian

presented with the ‘Academic and Peer Representation Award’ for her hard work and commitment in the Students in Free Enterprise Society while runnerup was Fiona Moss for her dedication to student advocacy on behalf of Postgraduate Researchers.

The winner and runner-up of ‘Community Spirit Award’ was Charlotte Williams and Rong Zhang respectively,

while Natalie Diver was presented with the award for ‘Entrepreneurial Spirit’ for her various successful business ventures. Runner-up was Alex Hawke, for his innovative and successful online ventures.

Compared by the seamless pairing of Education Officer Liam Dale and Athletic Union Officer Alice Holloway the evening was a huge success with over

170 guests.

Ania Kurek made a closing comment on the evening: “All those shortlisted at the ncl+ awards this year have truly excelled in all aspects of their extra-curricular work. It’s so nice to be able to recognise their efforts and to see the diversity of all activities taking place alongside students academic work”

Pioneering Jesmond Local profiled by Radio 4’s Naughtie and Co.

By Peter Wood and George Sandeman News Editor

HAVE I GOT NEWS FOR YOU?

‘Hyperlocal’ news providers aim to give readers content otherwise not covered by declining but larger regional papers Photography: Jesmond Local

Community news organisation Jesmond Local found itself the centre of attention on BBC Radio 4’s Today Programme last week.

The episode explored issues facing local journalism including declining newspaper circulation and revenues for most local and regional titles, the job losses as some daily publications transition to weekly formats and, at worst, closures all together.

Jesmond Local forms part of an increasingly popular trend of amateur ‘citizen journalists’ setting up ‘hyperlocal’ website to quench the appetite people have for news about the area they live in that was once provided by traditional print journalism.

Speaking to The Courier, editor Ian Wylie and Deputy Editor Dan Howarth, who both teach at the University,

explained Jesmond Local’s purpose: “We’re not trying to reinvent the local newspaper, we’re really going back to basics. “[It’s success] is predicated on the will of the local people to get involved and

and the impact its had on the Jesmond community. “I think we’re at the stage now where we’ve got a small following of really interested, regular readers.”

Jesmond Local also involves several Newcastle journalism students as re-

The strength of Jesmond Local as a news provider will be because people contribute to it, they feel an ownership of it give user-generated content.

“The strength of Jesmond Local will be because people contribute to it, they feel an ownership of it.”

Wylie and Howarth also spoke of how hyperlocal websites presently can’t be direct substitutes for local newspapers.

“We’re not even close to getting a sustainable business model yet.”

However, both sounded positive about the current status of the organisation

porters. Speaking to The Courier, contributor Linda Guma said: “Being a part of JesmondLocal has provided me with insight into hyperlocal community journalism and the ways in which it fosters a social cohesion.”

Bob Cooper also commented: “It’s also helped teach us some real cutting-edge practical skills for our future careers as journalists.”

6.news

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

Malaysian students gather for free and fair elections

NEW AGE POLITICS

Malaysian students from the University joined with compatriots to demand an end to dirty politics and guarantees of transparent democracy in elections Photography: Thuy Anh Phan

By Thuy Anh Phan Two Malaysian students, studying Architecture and Engineering at Newcastle, have organized a demonstration for fair and clean elections in their homeland.

Gathering at Grey’s Monument on 28 April, approximately 130 students came together from all over the region wearing yellow T-shirts and brandishing yellow placards.

The colour yellow was worn as part of

an international campaign called Global Bersih, with the latter word literally translating as ‘clean.’

The worldwide event saw demos happening at 85 locations in 35 countries all on the same day.

The Global Bersih campaign calls for electoral reform and an end to corruption in Malaysia and was recently restricted by government authorities.

The Newcastle participants were largely composed of the younger student generation but there were also some older generation participants as well as some families.

Speaking to The Courier, Szi Hang Sia, Architecture student and one of the organizers of the event, commented: “We

due to communication and organization through social networks such as facebook.

The Bersih campaign calls for electoral reform and an end to corruption in Malaysia expected just 50 people but in the end it turned out to be 130.

Everyone was very enthusiastic to share their story, make a roll call and stand-up for their own opinions.”

The event was made possible largely

The upcoming elections in Malaysia are a primary reason for holding demonstrations as, following the Bersih protests in 2007, the opposition party gained almost two thirds more seats than in the previous general election.

Szi Hang Sia recalled: “It was a new chapter in our history when the government was nearly defeated in the elections.”

Even though the events were not widely covered by the domestic media, and were subject to crackdowns by government authorities, he still believes that better times are to come.

“We really hope that the younger generation can be the one who have their say in the country, instead of hiding at the back and just listening to what the government says”.

The Courier

news.7

Monday 7 May 2012

NUDJ takes on nation’s best in new competition

By George Sandeman News Editor On the back of the widely acclaimed success of nights such as ‘90s HipHop Houseparty and The ElectroSuite, the Newcastle University DJ society are pitting themselves against some of the best in the nation.

NUDJ President Dan Mackinnon has entered the six-month-old society into the RBS Enterprising Student Society Accreditation (ESSA) competition that

The society runs free weekly workshops for aspiring turn-tablers and record-spinners as well as organising sell-out events at World Headquarters.

Mackinnon also spoke of the initial difficulties in setting up the society after coming to the Students’ Union and finding one didn’t exist.

“I set it up in October and by that point we had missed the Freshers’ Fair, [the application period for] grants, so it was really a matter of charging as little for membership as I could, which was £5, then running free weekly workshops

I think we’ve got a really good chance of winning with our ‘90s HipHop Houseparty and The ElectroSuite events seeks to recognise and reward the country’s best student societies.

Entering the Silver Award, the nearly 100-strong member club are vying for a £7,000 prize for Most Innovative Fund Raising Activity and a £3,000 prize for the Best Series of Events.

There are two runners-up prizes for each with £1,500 and £1,000 awarded respectively.

Speaking to The Courier Mackinnon expressed confidence saying: “I think we’ve got a really good chance of winning [the £3,000 events prize] with our 90’s HipHop Houseparty and the ElectroSuite.

“With the prize money we can get professionals in to help run the workshops, as well as put anything which makes the nights even sicker.”

‘PIMPING GOOD TIME’ NUDJ have put on a string of sell-out nights at World Headquarters, including 90’s HipHop Houseparty and Electrosuite, despite functioning for less than 12 months Photography: NUDJ / The ElectroSuite

Newcastle top 15 for ‘student experience’

By Kathryn Riddell In a recent survey of student experience, Newcastle was ranked alongside Warwick, Teesside and Surrey universities.

This was a drop from 13th place the previous year.

However, Newcastle did score highly on the categories for ‘convenient facili-

The editor of the survey, John Gill, said: “Student expectations are rising in line with the increase in tuition fees this autumn, putting pressure on universities both to compete for students and to ensure that they are not disappointed with their experience once they arrive.

“We hope this year’s survey will help universities to raise their game, learn

Loughborough, Sheffield, Oxford and Cambridge were all in the top five but were beaten to first place by Dundee ties’, ‘fair work-load’ and ‘good social life’.

The Times Higher Education Student Experience study surveyed 14,000 UK undergraduates who rated their university in 21 categories including quality of life, lectures and accommodation.

Loughborough, Sheffield, Oxford and Cambridge universities were all in the top five but were beaten to first place by Dundee, who rose from fifth place in last year’s survey.

Iain Kennedy, President of Dundee Students’ Association, explained the reasoning for their top ranking. “There are so many good things about being a student in Dundee.

“Almost all of the accommodation is either on campus or within a few minutes walk so there is a real ‘student village’ feel to the place and at the same time we are right in the centre of a vibrant city.”

from the best and meet the challenges of higher expectations and greater ‘consumer’ demand.”

Newcastle’s student experience score, calculated Newcastle from 228 student scored highly respondents, was overall total of on ‘convenient an which was facilities’, ‘fair 80.0 above the average work-load’ and score of 75.1.

This year the ‘good social University of life’ Oxford was rated as having the best quality of staff and lectures.

Northumbria University scored a 78.2 average and placed at number 31. However, this was a marked improvement with a jump of 14 places from number 45 a year ago.

and the Students’ Union have been fantastic help. They give free room and free equipment hire.”

Looking forward to next year, the second-year Psychology student commented: “It’s going to be even better. We’re going to go from strength to strength.

We’ve got our next ElectroSuite event in October when Stanton Warriors are coming up so that’s going to be massive.

“Hopefully that will get everyone really excited and be a big incentive for everyone to keep practicing and get up to a club standard so that they can support world artists.”

Mackinnon also paid tribute to fellow students Mel Cochrane, Vlad Shpilev, James Kirkby and Tim Castle for their contribution to the success of the society.

University rankings provide insightful information

LAURA WOTTON COMMENT

T

hese days everything, and I mean everything, is ranked.

From the ranking of professional sportsmen to the ranking of 2012’s new hoover range, we as consumers have to have a numerical gauge to decide what is best.

Yet, when it comes to university experience, these rather bland ratings cannot be a satisfying means of comparison.

The Times Higher Education Student Experience study assessed university experience by surveying more than 14,000 UK undergraduates. The students evaluated their experience based on a number of factors such as the quality of accommodation, lectures and campus environment.

The University of Dundee, which aspires to be labelled as ‘Scotland’s leading University’, came up trumps in the poll, swiftly followed by Loughborough and Sheffield based upon factors such as facilities available and industry contacts for future careers.

Newcastle ranked 15 overall, scored highly on the categories ‘convenient facilities’, ‘fair work-load’ and ‘good social life’ with the latter prompting hazy visions of the infamous Monday nights at Florita’s.

Northumbria entered at 31 in the tables, a marked improvement from last year’s ranking at number 45.

However, the overall results indicate the top 10 ranked institutions re-

mained unchanged from 2010.

Russell Group universities dominated the top of the rankings in comparison to more modern, research-intensive universities who pride themselves in possessing more close-knit campuses.

Indeed, Managing Director of Youthsight, Ben Marks, affirmed that “few post-1992 universities achieve The survey pro- top scores” and vides clueless attributes this to the fact that first time apinstituplicants with a such tions specialbasis on which ize in the “less to make their satisfying” arts choices, derail- courses and living ing potentially students at home, tend biased claims to miss out on a prospectus campus social life.” might make Yet the quesand allowing tion remains as for comparato how you can tive insight rate experience based on merely 21 categories.

The education system seems to be judged upon a series of management measures, a tick-box method of comparison that brashly establishes what is important to students and what is not.

Director of the National Union of Students, Jim Dickinson, highlighted the complexities of tailoring a positive university experience to a vast and differing range of individuals.

He outlined the fact that undergraduates will have a “completely different” stance on what is important to them than that of “a postgraduate studying part-time, who is perhaps worried about the quality of his course or speed of marking.”

He suggests that this sweeping standardization of university experience is futile when considering the range of different student priorities.

Yet, whilst students evidently prioritise different factors, they are unified in their desire to ‘get what they pay for’.

The survey provides clueless first time applicants with a basis, however generalized, on which to make their choices.

Certainly as a vulnerable sixth former, I was well and truly overwhelmed by the sheer volume of prospectuses I had to trawl through, all offering a similar range of course modules and state-of-the-art facilities that the various universities provide.

The survey, in this sense, goes a long way in derailing potentially biased claims a prospectus might make and allows for a comparative insight into university life by students who are actually experiencing it.

Although this recent tendency towards numerical comparison is especially unsatisfying in terms of student experience, there is no doubt that, besides word of mouth, the survey functions as a useful indicator to prospective students only too keen to get their money’s worth.

8.newsnationalstudent Students offer ‘Zoo’ club night relief to help with cancels Zebra exam stress plans

By Ralph Blackburn University of East Anglia Male students of the University of East Anglia are offering a sex service to relieve pre-exam stress.

Posters have appeared across UEA’s campus, offering ‘strong and handsome males’ for ‘confidential services’.

‘The School of Cock’, as this group have dubbed themselves, offer these services for free. They back up their claims, by stating, “scientific research proves that sex before the exam offers both physical exercise and good grades.” The School guarantee confidentiality by saying, “What happens during exam period stays in the pas(s)t!!!”

It is currently unknown as to whether anybody has taken the ‘School of Cock’ up on their offer.

A female second-year student commented saying, “I wouldn’t personally use this service myself but I can certainly see the appeal. If it is confidential then I can understand why some girls might be tempted.

“At the end of the day, everyone does need a break from revision and the library”.

Officer proposes campus ban on Lads’ magazines Leeds University Lads’ magazines may be banned on Leeds University campus following proposals

by Welfare chief Harriet Rankin.

The proposals aim to stop sexualised images being purported around the Union which would include Lads’ mags, sexualised promotional campaigns and naked charity calendars. At the moment the ideas are only at discussion stage, with the motion being debated by the Better Union Forum, a body which discusses ideas pitched by Union members.

The Deputy Editor of Loaded magazine, Joel Gilgallon responded to this suggestion with “We’ve always felt Loaded should be mentioned in the same breath as The Catcher in the Rye, Lord of the Flies and American Psycho.

It’s probably about time to join such esteemed banned literature.”

Photography: Digo Souza / Bobbie Johnson (Flickr)

Oxford University Oxford club night ‘Zoo’ have cancelled plans to bring a ‘real-life zebra’ to their Mayday party.

The facebook group originally stated, “Guaranteed to be the biggest Mayday party in Oxford... something the Oxford clubbing scene has never seen before - a REAL LIFE ZEBRA.” This provoked outrage with the RSPCA labelling the idea “appalling”, while students branded it “insane”.

Pressure from animal rights groups and local residents eventually forced the cancellation of the zebra, with PETA commenting, “We commend the club for turning its back on this ill-conceived plan.”

In response to this, an O x f o r d Brookes student Eddy Allison stated, “Don’t worry ladies, the animal issue is sorted, I’ll be bringing a snake with me”.

‘Gay conversion’ professor chosen for panel Bristol University A former Bristol University professor who backs ‘gay conversion’ has been chosen as a member of the panel that appoints the next Archbishop of Canterbury.

Glynn Harrison, who was Emeritus Professor of Psychiatry before retiring, believes homosexual feelings can be changed or ‘managed’.

President of Bristol Union, Gus Baker, stated that Harrison’s views were a “grotesque insult to the hundreds of LGBT students we have in the University of Bristol”.

Lack of pupils advised on Oxbridge Cambridge and Oxford Universities Under half of state school pupils are advised by their teachers to apply to Oxbridge.

Only 44% of secondary school teachers say they encourage gifted students to consider Oxford or Cambridge. The Sutton Trust, who commissioned the study, said more needed to be done in schools to “dispel the myths” about the UK’s top universities.

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

New library text message service to ensure study success

By George Sandeman News Editor The Robinson Library has introduced a new service allowing library users to contact staff discreetly when other users are causing too much noise.

Speaking to The Courier, Head Librarian Wayne Connolly explained: “We’re well aware of how busy the library gets at this time of year and that people want to get their heads down and study quietly.”

He spoke of how students usually complained when they had become

Job Title: The Times University Manager Employer: High Fliers Research Ltd. Closing date: 11.05.12 Salary: £10 per hour Basic job description: High Fliers Research Ltd are looking for individuals to work as University Managers. University Managers will provide vital support to the Research Manager by coordinating a variety of campus based market research tasks.

You will conduct a number of tasks during Semesters 1 and 2; the largest of which will be to manage The Times Final Year Student Survey. The results of the Survey will be presented to the UK’s top graduate employers in Spring 2013.

Person requirements: The ideal candidate will be sociable and have a good knowledge of their campus, with connections to societies and clubs. They must be able to plan and organise efficiently; and have the ability to work independently using their initiative to deliver the task at hand on time and to a high standard.

Location: Newcastle upon Tyne.

Job Title: Clerical Assistant Employer: NHS Closing date: 09.05.12 Salary: £14,153 to £17,253 pro rata Basic job description: An enthusiastic clerical assistant is required to work with the small health visiting team based in Cramlington. The hours are negotiable but will preferably be worked over 3 mornings (12 hours per week). The right candidate will be required to carry out general office duties in support of the health visiting service.

Person requirements: Key board skills and office experience, good organisational skills, numeracy, ability to work within a clear policy of confidentiality, willing to seek new opportunities to improve and develop, commitment to working as part of a team and meeting deadlines.

Location: Cramlington Job Title: Lunchtime Supervisory Assistant Employer: Gateshead Council Closing date: 11.05.12 Salary: £12,787 - £13,589 pro rata Basic job description: A Lunchtime Supervisory Assistant is required to work 6.25 hours per week at Washingwell Community Primary School in Gateshead. If successful you will be required to work five days per week 12.00 – 1.15pm. Job purpose: To seek to ensure that pupils are closely supervised during lunch break, administer low level first aid or seek help from the duty First Aider.

agitated enough to leave their seats, by which time, “the damage is already done.

“Some people don’t to comStudents can plain like to us at all, text noise or don’t want to complaints to leave their seat they 07891 484764 because might lose them.”

He explained that when students send a text to the number, detailing the floor they are on and where they are, a member of staff will attend and speak to the noise-makers.

In some circumstances they could be

asked to move to social areas like YourSpace to continue their work. The service is primarily aimed at users in the quiet areas on levels three and four in the library.

“It lets people contact us in a slightly different way and we’ll respond to it.

“We’re very much aware that people want [the Library] to stay quiet and we’ll do our best to keep it that way”.

At the time of printing, the Library confirmed that the service had already been used several times despite only just starting up last week.

Students in the Robinson Library can text noise complaints to 07891 484764.

Person requirements: You will have experience of working with children, be flexible, able to work within a team and willing to undertake training.

Location: Gateshead.

Personal Assistant (Support Worker) to help him with personal care such as showering and meal preparation at a weekend and to drive him to destinations of his choice on a Wednesday and a Sunday. It would be ideal if the applicant was also able to provide cover on a Friday. You will work 15 hours per week.

Person requirements: Other than a driving licence (which is an absolute requirement), no specific qualifications are required; just need a reliable, friendly individual who is physically fit enough to assist with getting into and out of bed and the shower and who will be happy to do whatever other basic tasks, such as tidying up, shopping etc that are needed on any given day.

Location: Newcastle upon Tyne.

Job Title: Retail Stylist Employer: Karen Millen Closing date: 14.05.12 Salary: National Minimum Wage Basic job description: A Retail Stylist is required to work 4 hours per week at the Karen Millen concession within the House of Fraser. A big part of your role will be getting to know your customers, building relationships & offering expert stylist advice which fits perfectly with each customer’s individual needs.

Person requirements: This role is suited to somebody who really cares about excellent sales service & possesses a love of luxury fashion. You will be a team player working to achieve exceptional personalised customer service, have a real interest in people & have superb communication skills to demonstrate your genuine passion for the Karen Millen brand & knowledge of their luxury fashion collection.

Location: Gateshead.

Job Title: Sales Assistant Employer: Hobbs Closing date: 14.05.12 Salary: Exceeds National Minimum Wage Basic job description: A Sales Assistant is required to work 10 hours per week at the Hobbs concession within House of Fraser, Metrocentre.

Person requirements: You must have flexibility - people who can work across core times within the business; a genuine desire to ensure all customers constantly receive exceptional service. You should have a natural ability to sell, be able to work as part of a team, have fashion experience at a mid to high end level and a love of fashion & experience in retail is preferred. The extensive training & development programme will help you with the rest.

Location: Gateshead.

Job Title: Male Personal Assistant Employer: Disability North Closing date: 31.05.12 Salary: £8.00 per hour Basic job description: Gentleman recovering from a stroke who lives in the Slatyford area of Newcastle is looking to employ a Male

Job Title: Bar and Floor Associates Employer: J.D Wetherspoons Closing date: 20.05.12 Salary: National Minimum Wage Basic job description: Bar and Floor Associates are required to work 16 hours per week at the Wetherspoons in the Metrocentre.

Duties will include taking orders, serving hot and cold drinks, cash handling, running food orders to tables, keeping work areas clean and tidy, clearing tables and other general duties. Experience would be an advantage but is not essential.

Person requirements: Applicants must be aged 18+ due to licensing laws, be friendly & approachable, have a good work ethic and be enthusiastic and willing to learn. An ability to work within a team is essential. All applicants must hold a current UK Bank Account in their name and have proof of Right to Work in the UK. Location: Gateshead.

Job Title: Search Engine Optimiser Employer: Newcastle Drum Centre Closing date: 24.05.12 Salary: TBC Basic job description: Newcastle Drum Centre, a UK-wide musical instrument retailer that has been in business since 1995, has a vacancy for a Search Engine Optimiser. They would like to offer a suitable student the opportunity to work with them on their website http://www.newcastledrum.co.uk/ on Search Engine Optimisation. It is envisaged that the work will be for one day per week.

Person requirements: The position would suit a musician but this is not essential.

Location: Newcastle upon Tyne.

The Courier

.9

Monday 7 May 2012

Comment

Comment Editors Sophie McCoid and Susie May Beever Online Comment Editor Jack Torrance courier.comment@ncl.ac.uk

Should the obese be forced to weight?

ANNA TEMPLETON

YES

C

ream cakes and nicotine versus penicillin and surgery: it is common sense where our health priorities should lie.

Yet the media criticised 54% of GPs who said the NHS should have the right to withhold treatment to obese or nicotine-addicted patients. The increasing population and cuts to public healthcare mean that controversial health issues such as this will become more and more frequent, so it is vital that some sort of resolution is achieved.

Fact: public sector net debt at the end of March 2012 was £1022.5 billion, and the NHS is under increasing pressure as a result of the cuts the government are making. However, demand for healthcare is exceeding existing resources, meaning that some form of rationing is entirely necessary.

With the case of treatment, who gets

priority? It appears that there are only two options: number one would work on a first come, first served basis. This appears fair, but doesn’t take into account the patients who are most in need.

Number two would be on the basis of those who need and deserve it the most.

Does a ‘textbook’ healthy patient, who contracts an illness purely by coincidence, not deserve priority treatment over a 40-a-day obese smoker?

Obesity is currently costing the NHS £6 billion per year, whilst smokingrelated illnesses similarly cost £2.5 billion. Therefore, the financial burdens of the NHS may be why doctors feel there is more justice in treatment favouring those who lead healthier lifestyles.

Doctors are not suggesting that they will refuse to treat the morbidly obese or regular smokers, but that patient prioritisation is made against the backdrop of NHS debt.

Surely we (the ones who rely on free healthcare) trust our doctors’ medical opinions to decide what is best for us.

If a doctor decides that being a regular smoker or being morbidly obese would hinder surgical survival chances, then maybe the denial of treatment seems justified.

In the same way, if an obese person goes through bariatric surgery, only to put weight back on, does a doctor not have the right to refuse repeat surgery?

It is easy to get overly ‘medicallyethical’ on a subject such as this, saying that doctors are shifting to some form of Darwinian view.

Image: Tobyotter (Flickr)

However, if people continue to rely on the NHS for easy treatment of their problems instead of tackling more intrinsic emotional or psychological reasons, we will turn into a state where the NHS is taken for granted. We may have a system of publicly funded healthcare, but this irrefutably should not translate into the abandonment of a healthy lifestyle.

SOPHIE MCCOID COMMENT EDITOR

NO

I

magine living in a society where if you were obese, a smoker or (God forbid) both, you would be denied free medical treatment.

Purely because you were overweight and/or hooked on nicotine you could be denied IVF treatment amongst other procedures. As dystopian as this society sounds, if 54% of doctors had their way this would become common practice in the UK. Doctors were asked by professional

networking site doctors.net.uk: ‘Should the NHS be allowed to refuse nonemergency treatments to patients unless they lose weight or stop smoking?’

Alarmingly the majority of doctors answered ‘yes’, something that disturbs me greatly.

Medical professionals have defended their decision to deny treatment to smokers and the obese because treatment can be more difficult and less likely to work on these two groups. This may be the case but surely just because something has less chance of working doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to alleviate the problem at all.

In these times of austerity some in the NHS believe that they shouldn’t be obliged to ‘waste’ resources on those who are ‘undeserving’. Whilst budgets need to be met and cutbacks made this should not be at the expense of patients’ health. The NHS was made to provide free healthcare to all UK citizens, putting in place these proposals this would be going against everything the NHS stands for and is a step on a very slippery slope.

Denying someone treatment that really needs it just because they made a poor lifestyle choice is simply morally and ethically wrong. I think it is acceptable for doctors to advise people to alter their habits before an operation is due to take place but if they try and fail to change their lifestyle it is my view that they should still be allowed the operation they require.

Smokers and obese individuals are

already being denied operations such as hip or knee replacements. Indeed, the medical magazine Pulse found that 25 of 91 primary care trusts had introduced treatment bans for those groups since April 2011.

This trend in my view is highly worrying and begs the question: when will doctors begin to think that refusing to provide emergency treatment to smokers and the obese is acceptable? And how long before other people who make bad lifestyle choices such as drug addicts and alcoholics are also refused NHS treatment.

The Royal College of Physicians, which represents hospital doctors, agrees with me and opposes the practice stating: “Lifestyle rationing is creeping into the NHS. There are reported examples where treatments have been restricted

by PCTs and we wouldn’t agree with that,” said Professor John Saunders, chair of the College’s ethics committees.

The Department of Health also finds the survey worrying: “There is no excuse to deny care on the basis of arbitrary blanket bans - the individual needs of patients must be taken into account” one spokeswoman said.

Whilst I believe smokers and obese people should attempt to change their lifestyle to improve their health and chance of operation success, they should not be denied treatment. Medical care is a basic human right in the UK and any lifestyle choice a person makes should ultimately not affect this.

10.comment

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

Sex games, horse riding and French villas

I

JACK TORRANCE ONLINE COMMENT EDITOR

t was with a mixture of cringeworthiness and amusement that I greeted the news last week that my former head teacher had been forced to resign over an alleged misuse of funds – paying for “inappropriate items – such as sex games and supplements” and horse care lessons for his son, amongst other dubious items.

Richard Gilliland (it still feels wrong to use his first name) also employed his wife, son and daughter, and used accommodation owned by the school, including a manor house and a property in France, for his family holidays.

Whilst in the private sector a school owning a French manor house might not be much of a big deal, in fact practically the norm, for a state school it seems somewhat extravagant.

The reason for this occurrence is that my former school is an academy, an example of the school system originally promoted by Tony Blair and now championed by the increasingly unpopular Education Secretary Michael Gove.

Out of this status sprung remarkable amounts of wealth for the school, which

has in recent years built a swimming pool, planetarium, sports centre, horse stables and synthetic 400 metre running track, massively improving the school’s facilities.

After spending seven years subjected to the school’s rigid moral code (officially called the rather Orwellian-sounding ‘Priory Way’) it was illuminating to see its credibility shattered to pieces by this scandal.

Whilst it would be disingenuous to suggest that my time at the school didn’t serve me well (in fact there are some fantastic teachers and I had some great experiences there), I think it does demonstrate one of the major problems that can arise out of the academy system.

That problem is the concentration of power, and the possibility of that power being abused.

The whole ethos of the academy system is about decentralising power, supposedly to the benefit of pupils at the schools. But we should question whether it’s necessarily a good thing to take away power from local education authorities, which have a democratic mandate due to being part of the council, and putting schools in control of localised special interest groups, who are not necessarily democratic.

Many academies are sponsored by religious organisations. Whilst this needn’t be an inherently bad thing in itself, we need to consider whether it’s acceptable to hand control of young people’s learning over to a group which has an explicit agenda.

One need only look as far as Gateshead to see an academy, Emmanuel College, one of whose stated aims is to “encourage personal, moral and spiritual development within a Christian framework.” Religious involvement in schools is especially concerning given the recent incident in which Catholic Schools asked pupils to sign a petition against gay marriage.

Whilst these were primarily nonacademy schools, in my opinion, it gives us some flavour of the agenda which religions seek to use education for, and should certainly give cause to consider whether a greater level of autonomy should be afforded to such schools.

Similarly, Jamie Oliver has raised concerns over the fact that academies are to be free from regulations introduced as a result of his campaign to make school meals healthier.

Quite why academies ought to be exempt from these regulations, which seek to combat childhood obesity and other health problems, is beyond me.

Ultimately it would seem to me that devolving power away from the state and towards special interest groups is wrong, given their potential ability to exercise such a great influence over their pupil’s lives.

ACADEMIES Michael Gove keen to

increase the number of UK academies.

Image: conservativeparty (Flickr)

Follow us on Twitter: @CourierComment @CourierOnlne

Hitler re-shelved

I

WILLS ROBINSON NEWS EDITOR

t has often been described as one of the longest and most boring rants of all time. However, although certainly not a page-turner, it has become of one the most symbolic books in twentieth century history.

Now it seems like Hitler’s part biography, part racist tirade ‘Mein Kampf ’ will be on German bookshelves for the first time since 1945, as the copyright deal with the current owners expires in 2015.

The new edition will be published as an annotated version, with academics currently producing commentaries to go alongside the text, which will aim to undermine Hitler’s arguments.

Almost seventy years have passed since the regime finished, however it remains in the mind of many Germans today, despite how only a small amount of that generation are still alive.

People around the world still travel to visit concentration camps like Aushcwitz and Germans are constantly reminded of the Third Reich’s atrocities, whether it is dramatized in Hollywood or encompassed in a memorial.

The question of whether Germany should face up to its past has been questioned by politicians and historians alike since Hitler’s death. However, the inclusion of opinions to coincide with text, looking to belittle Hitler’s ideas, seems to be as political as the book’s exclusion from the public sphere in the first place.

The German people need to form

their own opinion of the core ideologies of the book, and build up their own images of the past, rather than be indoctrinated by academics looking to shovel the ideas behind one of the most atrocious regimes aside.

The hope is that more young people reading the book will help to ‘demystify’ it.

German people need to form their own opinion of the core ideologies of the book The former Nazi dictator wrote ‘My Struggle’ while in prison after an attempt to stage a coup. It was then published in two volumes in 1925 and 1926 and, despite not directly mentioning mass killings over Europe, described the foundations of the Third Reich’s ideology.

Strangely, copies would commonly be given to newly-wed couples as a wedding present and over ten million editions were sold in Germany before the end of World War Two and collapse of the infamous Third Reich.

The Courier

comment.11

Monday 7 May 2012

THE NEWS THAT MADE ME EMILY RAE

STUDENT LOANS A lecture hall after the latest student loan instalment Image: Luc Legay (Flickr)

The end to student payday?

JENNY EVANS

T

he day you receive your student loan is, for the majority of students, like all your Christmases have come at once. Your bank balance suddenly jumps from £0 to over £1000 in just one day and the temptation to go all out and purchase a Mac, a once in a lifetime holiday or at the very least copious amounts of alcohol is enormous.

Such frivolous spending results in students often getting to the end of term with next to no money and that terrifying phone call home to beg your parents for something to tide you over as your ‘textbooks’ for that term were particularly expensive.

Should there then be better regulation of how students spend their money?

The idea is one which is already in practise at the University of East London with regards to its bursaries and grants.

Students are only allowed to spend their money on necessities such as books and rent, something which UEL’s pro viceChancellor Selena Bollingbrooke has

stated leads to better results and better attendance.

However, is it right to dictate to adults how they should be spending their money? There are no conditions as to how the average loan given by a bank should be spent so why should it be

it would be better to distribute student loans weekly or monthly in order to ensure that students don’t spend it all in one go on a luxury item that in the real world would take someone years to save for. If instead of getting over £1000 on one day, you got £100 weekly then

Your bank balance suddenly jumps from £0 to over £1000 in just one day and the temptation to go out and purchase a Mac is enormous any different for students. Ultimately, it is our decision whether we spend the money at Victoria 22 or in Blackwells.

It would surely be better to educate students as to how to be more responsible with their money than to impose a system echoing that employed by Communist states - monitoring how we spend our money on a daily basis.

There is also the question of whether

maybe students would not get to the end of the term penniless and sobbing on the phone to their parents. But, then again, this could encourage students to recklessly spend their weekly allowance safe in the knowledge that they would be getting a new payment in just a few days.

Speaking to fellow students, the reaction to the changes discussed was far

from unified. Izzy Stewart-Roberts, second year English and Classics student stated that “I would prefer to have my student loan distributed throughout the term. It is far too tempting to spend all your money in the first few weeks and by the end of the term you end up having to really watch how much you spend in order to be able to afford the bare essentials”. This stress surrounding money problems on top of already enormous exam stress could be counteracted by distributing the loan weekly or monthly and would allow students to concentrate on what is really important at university, academic success and enjoying themselves. However, with some students relying on the student loan to pay for their rent in termly instalments and landlords who are far from sympathetic, giving money out in weekly instalments could result in students not having enough money at the end of the term for rent and bills.

There is also an issue surrounding student overdrafts, some of which can be extended to £1500, an amount which would not be covered by the average student loan. Cutting these overdrafts, then, would surely lead to students being more responsible with their money as they would know that once all their money is spent, they are not going to get any more of what one student described as ‘free money’.

#9- Realise French Children’s TV is revision This week I had a French grammar test and was aghast to see that I got a whopping 12/30. Therefore I was pleased to see an article on the BBC advocating the benefits of bilingualism, secretly hoping that one day my efforts will pay off with both fluency and boosted brain power.

US researchers from Northwestern University have recently stated that learning another language is a great form of brain training, better than Sudoku puzzles or the addictive ‘Dr Kawashima’s Brain Training: How old is your brain?’ In fact, the article refers to past research showing that bilingualism could help ward off dementia.

Personally, I think it’s great that the hard work that goes into becoming fluent in a language results in not only cultural understanding but boosted brain power too. There is undoubtedly a plethora of benefits of speaking an extra language, and I’m not only talking about my plans to spend my third year in the sunny south of France here.

Not only do you get the opportunity to travel and work in a different country, but you have access to practically double the job opportunities you do if you stay monolingual in England. With the Office for National Statistics stating in a BBC article on the 7 March 2012 that about a fifth of new graduates are unemployed, it’s something to think about in the current job and economic climate.

The research conducted by NorthWestern University shows that bilingualism changes and improves how the nervous system responds to sound. The research team used scalp electrodes to trace the pattern of brainwaves of people listening to different sounds. They found that monolingual and bilingual volunteers responded similarly to the sounds in silent laboratory conditions.

However when there was background noise, the bilingual volunteers were able to process sounds more efficiently.

Professor Nina Kraus states that the bilingual speakers’ auditory systems are ‘highly efficient, flexible and focused in its automatic sound processing, especially in challenging or novel situations’.

I can relate to this with my experience of going on a French exchange.

Although my French vocabulary improved dramatically in the first few days as I was taught and made to repeat rude French phrases to my French exchange’s friends on demand, at the beginning of the week I had no clue what his family were saying across the dinner table.

Surely this counts as a ‘challenging or novel situation’. We had the standard bilingual ‘faux pas’ situations, like me saying ‘cheers’ and him thinking I was demanding cheese all the time. However, by the end of the week, I started to get the gist of his parents’ ridiculously fast conversation. More importantly, I could work out whether they were talking about me.

I think it’s important to have articles on bilingualism, especially in an era where currently it’s not mandatory to take a foreign language to GCSE. This was scrapped by the last Labour government and according to a Telegraph article on the 15 March 2012, the number of pupils taking GCSEs in languages halved from 80% to just 40% between 2000 and 2011.

Surely in a world where most of the rest of the world speak several languages we’re missing out on something here.

Those who take the lazy view of ‘everyone speaks English anyway’ need to wake up to what they’re missing out on.

12.

Monday 7 May 2012

Having a ball

It’s all about finishing the year in style with classic shapes, clinched waists and sharp-cut sophistication

The Courier

The Courier

.13

Monday 7 May 2012

Photography by Moises Bedrossian Modelled by Amanda Old (left), Verity Jennings (right) and Tom Ward Make up by Abi Heath Hair styling by Catherine Hadfield Directed by Victoria Mole Shot in Revolution Newcastle Blue maxi dress by Quiz, £59.99 Sparkle wedges by Asos, £50 Pink prom dress by Lipsy, £90 Black peeptoe shoes by Office, £65 Shirt by H&M, £15 Men’s shoes by BASE London, £40

14.

Monday 7 May 2012

The Bucket List

The Biscuit Factory, Stoddard Street The Biscuit Factory is modern and spacious, offering visitors to feast their eyes on a variety of contemporary art works including oil paintings, photography and eccentric sculptures. Interestingly, some of the works on display are by exceptionally recognised young local artists. Julie Dumbarton’s Spring Cube Exhibition (until 28 May) is not to be missed this season. Her abstract paintings feature warm floral landscapes and in-season pastel colours. Additionally, the 10x10 Printmaker’s Gallery, dedicated to the Biscuit Factory’s 10th anniversary, has an eye-catching modern piece which tempts a purchase at a surprisingly affordable price.

Dance City, Temple Street

The Toon has something for everyone, but occasionally it’s a bit all too much, especially when time’s a-tickin’. So here’s our wish list to get covered before you graduate

Dance City offers to tell a story through performance, engaging with senses beyond the visual – it captures the imagination like no other art, making individuals feel at one with the narrative. Among the current dance theatre productions, Mark Bruce Company’s Made in Heaven (Saturday 26th May) and Appetite Dance Production’s Letter To My Father. What’s more, there are opportunities to get involved in Tango and Burlesque workshops and a chance for you to be part of Big Dance – the UK’s biggest dance celebration.

Nicole Stevenson

Pink Triangle

Brew Dog bar, Dean Street Only just opened, the BrewDog bar on Dean Street heading down to the Quayside is an ale lover’s paradise. Stocking mainly BrewDog’s own fantastic craft beers as well as a few guest ales, it really is somewhere to check out due to the great selection. This is no ordinary, elitist ale pub where people look down on your for ordering something not to their taste. The friendly staff are happy to help you choose something you will like and the décor, including a pinball machine and Operation, are there to ease you into the world of craft beers and replace your usual stuffy smelling local.

Christopher Taylor

Slices, Grainger Market After living in Newcastle for almost two years, I only discovered Slices about two month ago. It really is one of those tucked away little treats you have to be told about.

Producing some of the best slices of pizza for under £2, it is the place to go if you forget your lunch or just want to wander around with some food. Fantastic dough, plenty of cheese, huge slices and about 4 flavours on offer most times it’s unsurprising that it usually has a pretty long queue at lunch time. Being in Grainger Market, it’s a great place to stop while you get your fruit and veg.

Christopher Taylor

The Courier

Namely, ‘Eazy Street’ then onto Powerhouse. For an unforgettable and reliably hilarious night out, it must be the pink triangle. Composed of many gay bars, this area attracts locals and tourists alike due to its sterling reputation and undeniably friendly atmosphere. Eazy Street trebles bar boasts cabaret and drag-DJs and is an excellent pre-Powerhouse warm up with cheap Monday drink deals and a diverse clientele. Just be warned – the drag acts can be scathing! Onto Powerhouse, ‘Rewind’ presents a huge, cheesy club night aimed at students. For just £1 entry before 12.30, you would be foolish not to try out this fantastic venue and all that the Newcastle gay scene has to offer.

Nicole Stevenson

arts

Newcastle Arts Centre, Westgate Road The up-and-coming exhibition in the art gallery is The North Sea Scape (5 May - 2 June), featuring visually powerful paintings and photography of sea landscapes. For a breezier visit, check out the Craftshop, selling unique hand-made gifts you won’t find anywhere else – perfect for a friend with a creative side. Feeing va-va-voom? The Black Swan venue (in the basement) is the place to visit for a lively, cultural experience.

Showcasing theatrical, music and dance events, such as Jazz and world music, it is complemented by a sophisticated interior.

Why not add a sense of culture to the end of your week – shake the stress away with Salsa dance lessons, followed by free admission to the bar for relaxing drinks.

Nicole Stevenson

Dance in Sinners cage There is a reason why people fight for a space in that infamous cage. Because it makes you feel slutty. And you love it.

Whilst I would be shocked to discover an undergraduate who had not had a treble too many and discovered their talent for erotic cage dancing – I fear they do exist. If that minority includes you – rethink your priorities, push the dissertation to one side, and head down to sinners – where the devil will welcome you whatever night of the week it may be!

Clare Vaughan

‘Red Raw’, The Stand

Clare Vaughan

Mistletoe Bakery, Jesmond The best solution for a midnight attack of the munchies is Mistletoe Bakery in Jesmond. Other than Saturday nights, Mistletoe is open 24 hours a day with a selection of sweet and savoury goods. However, while the pizza slices and pasties taste good at any level of sobriety, the cakes are best left alone until after a suitable amount of alcohol consumption. This is made up for in the rock bottom prices, which allow you to purchase a significant selection using only your loose change.

going out food and drink

Emma Oulton

Stateside Diner, Pink Lane

In a dingy alleyway next to Central Station, you will find a snapshot of 1950s America.

From the moment you step in to Stateside Diner, you are transported back to the era of James Dean, Marilyn Monroe and rock’n’roll. The walls are hung with posters of your favourite icons and a free jukebox holds an impressive collection of rockabilly, swing, and rhythm and blues. Stateside is not for the calorie conscious. The drinks menu alone can fill you up with soda floats, milkshakes and alcoshakes with names

Every Wednesday, a number of brave individuals from here, there and everywhere, come to perform at The Stand comedy club.

For just £2, you can enjoy an eclectic and unpredictable compilation of ‘up and coming’ new comedians, willing you for a laugh.

There are sure to be some giggles at this brilliantly priced night; and with a capacity of 300, this basement venue promises a warm and intimate atmosphere.

Doors open at 7.30 and so could act as a fantastic and alternative pre-cursor to a Legends night out or simply a much-needed break from revision; but be sure to get there early, as the limited number of seats mean they sell out fast!

(If watching comedy isn’t your thing, there are also opportunities to book a slot stage if you fancy yourself as a bit of a joker.)

Clare Vaughan like ‘Great Balls of Fire’. Although the main menu offers a large and delicious variety, including large stacks of pancakes with bacon and maple syrup if you make it for breakfast, the main attraction is the truly amazing burgers. If you manage to have any appetite left over, their All-American dessert menu is topped off with the fabulously named Knickerbocker Glorys!

Emma Oulton

The Courier

.15

Monday 7 May 2012

The Great North Run Whether you’re taking part or cheering everyone else on from the side-lines, the Great North Run is such an integral part of Newcastle that you can’t afford to miss it.

Effectively shutting down the city centre for the day every September, this is the most popular half marathon in the world, with over 54,000 participants coming from all over the country. Not only will the community atmosphere and enthusiasm of the runners inspire you to actually start that jogging regime you promised you’d stick to for last New Year’s resolution, but many people run for charities such as Cancer Research UK and are well worth your support from the track or the side-lines.

sport

St James’ Park A visit to St James’ Park Stadium (and yes, I will persist in calling it by its old name because Sports Direct Arena makes it sound like you’re off to buy a pair of trainers) is more than worth it for the experience alone; as every true Geordie’s place of worship, a visit here epitomises the friendliness and enthusiasm of Newcastle. Even if you’re not a massive football fan, you’ll find yourself swamped in an oversized black and white shirt yelling along with the thousands of people on either side of you. You’ll be awed by the electric atmosphere, enthusiasm of the crowd, and the sheer scale of the stadium; with a capacity of over 50,000, the stands are a sea of black and white as far as the eye can see. A definite must-see for every student in Newcastle.

Catherine Davison

Catherine Davison

Stan Calvert The epic annual battle between Newcastle and Northumbria University for sporting supremacy, every Newcastle student should attempt to make it down to Gateshead International Stadium to cheer on the 70 plus teams that compete against each other every year in a variety of different sporting events. Not only is the venue and the level of skill shown impressive, but the Stan Calvert Cup is the most prestigious award for many sports clubs and societies, and most people will know someone competing if they’re not involved themselves. But even if you don’t, Newcastle have won the Cup for the last 5 years in a row, so show your support and help to make it 6!

Foreign film at Tyneside

Whether you love F1, the adrenaline rush of death-defying speeds, or even just enjoy as casual country drive now and then, the F1 indoor go-karting centre in Gateshead is one of the best participation sports that Newcastle has to offer. After a brief safety video drivers are let loose on the indoor track and compete against each other for the fastest lap time, driving at speeds of up to 40mph in karts which sit just 3 inches above the ground. Perfect for parties or just as a variation from the normal days out in Newcastle with your housemates, this is guaranteed to bring out your competitive side, and at around £20 per person for a half hour session is excellent value for money.

Before donning the graduation robes this summer, make sure you’ve been down and experienced the Evolution Festival by the quayside. Few cities have such a collection of musician and bands all in two days, and with the reasonable sized crowd, it manages to feel like any other festival, but means you can get fairly close to both stages without being flattened. OK, so what if it takes place in a car park and is full of drunk kids? At least you can see over their four-foot stature and brush them aside easily. With such a diverse line up, there really is a reason for everyone to go at least once, and the price tag means you won’t need to dip much further into the overdraft to afford to go.

Chris Scott

music

The defining landmark of the North East is, in my opinion, one best experienced from the comfort of the passenger seat whilst driving up the A1. At 66ft high and with a wingspan of 177ft, it’s certainly an impressive feat of engineering, but no more interesting up close than from a distance.

And besides, everyone knows that bigger isn’t always better...

High Bridge Street

I love old things, and I love cheap things even more, so when I first heard of the much raved about High Bridge Street I was expecting vintage shopping heaven. Not so.

Yes, the shops are quirky, and it’s well worth a wander along for some window shopping, but if you want items which aren’t mass produced and selling at ‘antique’ prices get yourself down to Tynemouth market for the real treasures.

I am aware that this entry will probably cause public (student) outrage. But come on guys, ask yourself if it’s really okay to eat from a place which is socially unacceptable to visit before 2am. We all know there are much better places to eat, even at that hour of the morning, and places like Get Stuffed have a much wider range of food for the same price. So, having accepted that fact, we can all happily ignore it and get back to our cheesy chips and gravy...

film

F1 Indoor Go-karting

Jazz Cafe, Pink Lane

The Angel of the North

Munchies

Catherine Davison

Evolution Festival

No need to bother...

Catherine Davison

You are a horrible person. Yes, you. You’ve walked straight past the Jazz Café leaflet man ever since Fresher’s Week. And even if you’ve politely taken the occasional flyer, how many times have you actually been? Despite looking like a makeshift bar set up in a hoarder’s living room, the Jazz Café is an interesting experience. Different events happen each night it’s open; sometimes you can sit and watch a proper performance, while other evenings are more communal.

Bring your own instrument and join in with the improvising, and even if you’re less gifted, someone’s often willing to give you a quick accordion lesson.

Becca Price

Record shopping in the Toon Record shops might seem like the haven of the socially awkward and the cooler-thanthou arty kids, but there really is something wonderfully personable about independently-run music outlets. While they’re increasingly a rarity, Newcastle has three major ones in the city centre - RPM, Reflex and Beatdown - so you should really give at least one a go before you leave. HMV might be more convenient, but nothing beats stumbling across unexpected bargains.

Ben Travis

Ice Skating at Centre for Life

Even if you don’t speak a foreign language, there’s a whole load of films out there that you’re missing out on. ‘Monsieur Lazhar’ is nominated for ‘Best Foreign Language Film’ at this year’s Oscars and the trailer can be seen here. No need to worry, as although the film is in French, there are English subtitles.

The film starts screening at the Tyneside Cinema on Friday 4th May and you can book your ticket online.

Emily Rae

Growing up in London, I always loved the beautiful ice rinks that pop up everywhere at Christmas time. This year, armed for the first time with sufficient money and an icehockey playing boyfriend who was actually willing to come with me, I was determined to finally experience the outdoor rink.

Unfortunately, Newcastle’s version didn’t quite live up to the dream; miniature, overcrowded and with the somewhat unromantic setting of Digital in the background, this was not quite what I had in mind.

The Baltic

A film of photographs at Amber Side Cinema With only 51 seats, the Amber Side Cinema by the Quayside normally gets hired out for private functions. On 31st May at 7:30pm there’s a showing of ‘The Writing in the Sand’. This film is constructed entirely from old black and white photographs and details a family’s day out on the beaches of North East England. The film’s 400 photos, which were all taken over a period of 17 years, fit seamlessly together along with carefully chosen music and poetry. You can see a preview here: Concession tickets are only £4 so book tickets quickly online.

Emily Rae

Watch an old newsreel at Tyneside Theatre

At the Tyneside Theatre you can watch free original newsreels every day along with a free guided tour. The Tyneside Theatre was originally built as Newcastle’s News Theatre in 1937 and today it’s the only newsreel theatre that operates as a cinema as well. If you don’t fancy a tour guide, you can have a wander round by yourself. You’ll also get to have a go at getting an old fashioned projector to work! The free guided tours take place at 11.15am every Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. You can book in advance (call 0845 217 9909) or get your ticket at Box Office on the day.

Emily Rae

Go if you like modern art and thought that Robert Ryman’s blank canvas displayed in the Tate Modern is the most inspiring thing you ever saw; or, like me, if you pretend to like it, and really go for the carrot cake in the cafe afterwards and the gratifying rush when you can go home and tell your parents that you’re cultured now. Otherwise, your day is probably better spent elsewhere.

Castle Garth

I love Newcastle, and am eternally grateful that I chose such an interesting and cultural city to study in; but if there’s one thing that we just don’t do well, it’s castles. Apart from anything else, very little of Castle Garth in the city centre remains, and the bits that do are disenchantingly surrounded by the railway line and modern city blocks. To see a real castle, hop on a train to Durham or Alnwick, or better yet brave the Scots and take a day trip to Edinburgh.

Scalini’s

Osbourne Road favourite, this mainly made this list in protest against the £1 price rise on their happy hour menu. It should be pointed out, however, that the happy hour menu was the only good reason for going to Scalini’s in the first place; similarly uninspired pasta and pizza dishes, along with a wide variety of more delicious ones, can be found 100m down the road at a now comparable price in Firenze and Francesca’s.

Catherine Davison

16.lifestyle

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/lifestyle c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk

The Best of British Food fit for The Queen Shorthand Irish Dance Society

Who? The Irish Dance Society.

Newcastle’s very own Riverdance… well I never…

In a manner of speaking, yes. Although you don’t have to be Michael Flatley to join…

Shame, I rather fancied myself as a world-famous, male Irish dancer in tootight leggings and ballet pumps.

Fortunately, no-one else has struck upon that fantasy yet. No, the society boasts three classes - beginners, intermediate and advanced and anyone is welcome.

Regardless of nationality?

Of course, although many Irish students have taken it up again, having danced previously in their school days.

What if I’m a complete novice - not a dancing/Irish bone in my body..?

That’s fine - ‘many people progress from beginner to intermediate quite quickly’ and you don’t have to join at the beginning of the year either; ‘Many people signed up at the re-fresher’s fair in January.’

And the men… any brave ones involved?

Some- although the society is predominantly female (about 30 people turn up regularly to practices, but numbers are growing). The President is eager to make clear that this not a ‘girly’ sport, however, (a common misconception about the society) encouraging anyone, male or female, to give it a go.

And the dances?

Spectacular.

I meant what kind of dances? And who takes them? I want details!

Alright, keen. ‘The dances are a mixture of the more traditional and those with a more modern take on them’. Certain steps are learnt for the traditional ‘jigs’, and often an original version will involve a re-working of these steps.

You make this sound faaar too easy…

Perhaps - it all depends. The advanced group generally bears members who have danced for years - ‘sometimes people don’t appreciate quite how hard the dances can be. On the other hand, dancers often complain that they will never pick up dances demonstrated, and are pleasantly surprised when, with practice, they do.’

Practice makes perfect.

For some, yes…

So in theory I could soon be a talented Irish dancer performing to thousands on stage (complimentary green outfit at the ready)…

In theory…

No shows?

Of course - the society performs both at the annual dance show (which took place last term) and St. Patrick’s Day. There are also performances which take place in the union and other venues, however, no competitions.

Why? Many of the dancers are part of other dance schools/companies.

Fair enough. Where do I sign?

On the union website - it’s a fiver for the whole year. Check out their Facebook page and follow them on Twitter for further info. Give it a go and surprise yourself.

To join and for more information email gillian.hodge@ncl.ac.uk Nonie Heal

There is so much more to British food than fish and chips and a Sunday roast. With the Queen’s upcoming jubilee and the Olympics taking over London, it is time to get patriotic and celebrate our traditional British dishes.

Chorizo scotch eggs A great twist on an old classic!

(Makes 6) 600g minced pork 2 tsp each finely chopped thyme, sage, chives and parsley 2 tsp sweet smoked paprika 2 tsp hot smoked paprika ¼ tsp cayenne pepper 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped 1 tsp fine sea salt Freshly ground black pepper

palms to wrap and cover the egg completely. Seal the joins well.

6. Next, dip it in beaten egg and roll it in breadcrumbs until it is completely covered.

Repeat with the remaining eggs.

7. Heat about 2cm of oil in a deep pan up to a temperature of 180C. Carefully lower the eggs into the oil and fry for six to eight minutes, turning frequently, until they are a nice brown colour. Drain on kitchen paper.

Plus…

7 eggs Plain flour, for dusting and coating A couple of handfuls of fine white breadcrumbs Sunflower oil, for frying

Popolo’s

Usually if I’m walking down towards Tyne Bridge and the Metro Radio building it’s because I’m going to get my weekly fix of the Alvino’s pizza and wine deal, but tonight I’ve been introduced to its more upmarket neighbour, the American diner-themed restaurant and cocktail bar, Popolo’s.

Although not heaving at 7.30pm on a Monday night, the bouncer on the door was evidence that it was probably going to get a lot busier over the next few hours, and the eclectic music made up for the small number of diners, providing a cosy, informal atmosphere. We were led to a booth by a friendly waitress and settled into the comfy leather seats to peruse the menu.

Being well-known locally as a top cocktail bar, we felt it our duty to try one of their concoctions. I went for the ‘Gin Laden’ (I couldn’t decided if this was a cheeky terrorist pun or not, and whether it was okay to find it clever or not…) with Hendricks gin and limoncello, and my boyfriend chose a ‘Bermudan Storm’ which turned out to be our waiter’s speciality – and once I’d had chance to try the tasty ginger and rum blend, I wished I’d ordered that one too.

I’d heard good things about the burgers at Popolo’s so decided to give the homemade five bean burger and potato skins a try, whilst my boyfriend chose the homemade fish fingers and handcut chips. The only

4 chicken breasts 1 bunch of spring onions 5 rashers of bacon 150g button mushrooms 1 tablespoon on plain flour 2 tsp English mustard 1 tbsp creme fraiche 300ml chicken stock a few sprigs of thyme sheet of puff pastry

1. Preheat oven to 200C. 2. Brown off all the chicken and bacon for approximately 5 minutes.

3. Add chopped spring onions and mushrooms to the chicken.

4. Pour over a tablespoon of flour and then the chicken stock.

5. Add the English mustard and a couple of sprigs of thyme.

6. Add the crème fraiche leave to simmer while you prepare the pastry.

7. Roll out the pastry as thin as possible.

8. Empty contents of the saucepan into a pie dish.

9. Place pastry on top of the chicken mixture and cut off all the excess.

10. Place in the oven for about 25 minutes or until the pastry is golden brown.

11. Serve with a generous portion of mashed potato.

1. Mix together all the ingredients for the chorizo, cover and refrigerate for a few hours or overnight if possible.

2. Divide the mixture into six, place a piece between two sheets of baking parchment and press with the bottom of a pan until it’s about 5-7mm thick. Repeat with the rest of the mixture and chill for 30 minutes.

3. Boil six of the eggs (reserve one for the coating) for seven minutes, drain and cool under the cold tap. Shell the eggs.

4. Lay out a bowl containing flour seasoned with salt and pepper, the chorizo mixture, a bowl of beaten egg and a bowl of breadcrumbs.

5. Coat each egg with seasoned flour, then place it in the centre of a flattened piece of chorizo mix and carefully gather up the meat, pressing it firmly between your

Restaurant Review

Chicken, mushroom and bacon pie

Eliza Barrow

82-84 Pilgrim Street NE1 6SG 0191 232 8923

thing I had a slight problem with whilst we were there was the too-tightly bound menus, which made it difficult to open the pages fully to see the cocktails or food, but once we’d chosen it didn’t make any difference to the enjoyment of the meal. As we waited for the food, the waiter brought over a little silver ‘bucket’ of marinated olives with sundried tomatoes and garlic for us to nibble on, and while I don’t usually like olives, they were really moreish!

I certainly wasn’t disappointed with my main course either – just upset that I couldn’t finish it all! It arrived on a wooden board complete with a tiny mock chip pan fryer full of potato skins and a dish of homemade coleslaw, followed by my boyfriend’s fresh fish fingers on another wooden board with a bowl of chips, tartare sauce and pureed peas. The presentation was nearly as good as the food!

By this time, a few more tables had filled up and we had seen more than one couple race for the much-coveted red sofa by the fireplace – I don’t know what was so special about it but when I go back next Thursday for Popolo’s Prohibition-themed happy hour (£1 off all American beers and bourbon and some cocktails £4.50 instead of £6.50) I will definitely have to be quick to see what all the fuss is about.

Aimee Philipson

Opening times:

Sun- Tues 11- 12am Wed- Sat 11- 1am

A cross between a New York bar and an Italian coffee shop

The Courier

lifestyle.17

Monday 7 May 2012

Lifestyle Editors: Ben Parkin, Emma Balter and Lauren Stafford Online Editor: Lauren Cordell

Penny Pincher

Rosie Jenkinson Want something to do each night of the week? Check out these fantastic deals that include weekends as well as weekdays!

You will never be left with nothing to do on an evening this week!

On MONDAY this little piggy went to… …Ask Italian, where they always have good deals on their dishes. Currently they have a 2 for 1 for £2 – where you buy two main meals and the cheapest only costs £2. Visit their website to download the voucher! Not valid on Saturdays.

On TUESDAY this little piggy took… … advantage of Saverday Tuesdays at the Empire Cinema (The Gate). See any movie you want on a Tuesday for only £3.50. I might go and see The Hunger Games again, or the new Avengers movie.

On WEDNESDAY this little piggy had… …2 for 1 burgers with a friend at Spur Steak and Grill at the Metro Centre (Yellow Quadrant). You don’t need a voucher to use this deal, you just need to show up on a Wednesday evening after 5pm and feast on juicy burgers.

On THURSDAY this little piggy had… …to go to The Sage and dine out in style!

Download this voucher http://bit.ly/KiLrw9 to receive 20.12% off at the Brasserie in The Sage on reservations after 7.30pm.

With stunning architecture and beautiful

# 7 Bowling, Burgers and the Brasserie at The Sage

What’s Hot

food, this is one special way to spend an evening. (Lads, this would make a brilliant place to take a girl on a date.)

On FRIDAY this little piggy went… …to Namco Funscape at the Metro Centre (located right next to Spur Steak and Grill).

They have some fantastic deals on bowling at the minute. They have a late night deal every Friday and Saturday from 8pm onwards which includes 3 games of bowling plus a drink for £9.95 per person. On Wednesdays and Sundays from 6pm+ you can play 3 games of bowling for £6 per person. Check out http://namcofunscape.com/ to print off your vouchers.

And then the last little piggy decided…

TO MAKE A WEEKEND OUT OF IT… …and go to Tynemouth’s first ever Food Festival, a two day event that will give you quite an appetite.

Be prepared to taste all the best food and drink that the North East has to offer, 9am – 4pm on Saturday 12 May and Sunday 13 May. With lots of free tasting and samples, this will be a brilliant way to meet local producers of food and support the community. You’ll be able to pick up some bargains and also find out where the best places are to buy your produce in Newcastle.

And NEXT WEEKEND… Go to The Late Shows. From Friday 18 May to Saturday 19 May, Newcastle and Gateshead are having a free culture crawl, where many venues and attractions are open free to the public after closing hours to enjoy special exhibitions and art! Check out http://www. thelateshows. org.uk to see a list of which venues are participating!

You’ve got problems!

Got a dilemma and don’t know where to turn? Uncle Monty, fifth marquis of Rutland, will sort you out in Monty return for a bottle of Frosty Jacks and a croissant.

Honestly, you people. Obviously you should try to avoid unnecessary collapses as often as possible. Eat the carbs. Embrace the carbs. Love the carbs. Please share some of your carbs with me. I haven’t had anything carb-based since Christmas 2007, when the soup kitchen sadly had to stop giving out bread rolls due to an incident involving myself, Crackers Alan and an extremely elaborate heist. Well, I say elaborate – the plan was elaborate, but in the event Alan got spooked by an owl and ended up shrieking the house down. I had to stuff bread roll after bread roll into his mouth just to get him to shut up. Ironically enough, the sight of Alan frothing at the mouth and windmilling his arms around put quite a dent in my appetite.

Dear Uncle Monty, I have a problem concerning my housemate. She’s great and everything, but she has a disgusting habit of going to the toilet and not washing her hands. Even worse, she frequently goes straight to the cupboard and gets out my favourite mug for her cup of tea. Just

The Return of Made in Chelsea In general, absurdly rich, uncharismatic Londoners with a penchant for sipping champagne and swapping sexytime partners are rather grating.

However, this lot make for addictive television. I, for one, have invested in a dangly cross earring a la Proudlock in an attempt to emulate the MIC lifestyle.

The Genius of Betty Crocker There’s nothing more satisfying than opening the oven door and reaching in for your freshly-baked cakey goodness. All you need is an egg, some water and a spoon.

Illustrations: Daisy Billowes

Uncle Monty, I am faced with a terrible dilemma.

I’m a big fan of carbohydrates, but the inevitable bloating which follows their consumption means that certain dresses are unwearable on nights out.

However, I can’t say I enjoy feeling like I’m going to faint in lectures. How can I get round this?

Metro Victories With the impending Metro barriers to prevent those pesky ‘Metro thieves’ managing to ride for free, every successfully unpaid journey is a middle-finger in the face of the repressing killjoys at Nexus, who don’t realise coin operated machines that require fistfuls of small change are, like, so 1985.

thinking about it is making me retch. What should I do?

I think it was Winston Churchill who once pointed out that you shouldn’t just fight fire with fire, you should fight everything with fire. I’m sure when he said that, he had in mind unintentional and banal acts of vandalism such as this. Possibly he said it when Clement Attlee wore Churchill’s favourite Iron Maiden t-shirt to do the gardening in. Anyway, I think a suitably Churchillian riposte would be to leave a poo on your housemate’s desk. I don’t care where you get it from; it’s the symbolism that matters. A poo on a desk is a poo on a desk, whichever way you look at it. Cat poo arguably has the greatest staying power, believe me. I’ve had a bit on this jacket since the autumn of 1998. Still stinks.

I wrote a Facebook status the other day about how happy I was to find that, when only anticipating one packet of Mini Cheddars from a vending machine, I in fact received two. A boy I fancy liked said status. Does this mean I should ask him out for lunch? This kind of connection doesn’t come along every day.

I should say so, yes. As Crackers Alan says, this is the time for you to “Get your chirpse on”. I don’t know what chirpsing entails, but that’s what you should be doing. Alan’s from south London, so I imagine chirpsing is much like the northern mating rituals of Stanley knife fights and bottling. Chirpse him unto A&E, then you can rely on the old Florence Nightingale effect to turn him to putty in your hands. And that, kids, is how we can turn psychology to some practical use.

Embarrassing Bodies Sitting down with a marginally undercooked omelette and switching on the TV to a barrage of pus, anal probes, lubricated fingers and hookworms is what I’ve been waiting for all week.

A show which started out exploring nice palatable subjects like head lice and STIs has now plummeted to levels that even Channel 5 fear to sink to.

Thank you Dr Christian, you beefcake you.

Dissertation Stress Temperatures in the Robinson computer clusters have reached record peaks as final years attempt to type up their dissertation. On behalf of the smug first and second years, we say thank you for keeping us toasty with the residual heat from your sweating brow.

Moving out In an attempt to avoid the cleaning bill at the end of a tenancy, minds turn to the state of the plughole/fridge/toilet.

Time to invest in Marigolds.

What’s Not Amelia Wareing

Illustrations: Daisy Billowes

18.lifestyle

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/lifestyle c2.lifestyle@ncl.ac.uk

Making the most of your summer With employers increasingly looking for more than just a degree in every graduate application, we asked four students how they’ve used, or are to use, time off their studies to add that extra spark to their CVs Charlotte Krol, MA International Multimedia Journalism What was your placement?

I undertook a four week internship at BBC 6 Music Introducing with Tom Robinson in November at the 6 Music studios in central London.

How did you find out about it?

All BBC work placements are searchable via their website. You can set up an account with your details and then sign up for alerts that match your specified criteria.

I didn’t find out about the placement through these alerts actually, but by manually searching for BBC 6 Music placements based in London because I thought that’s where they would likely be held!

What was the application process like?

The application process was easy to get your head round,

Sally Priddle, BA English Literature, History and Politics What is your placement?

I have been offered an internship to be a political assistant for an MP. How did you find out about it?

I wrote to my local MP and asked if I could do a week’s work experience with him and then I found out whilst doing the week that he had taken interns before.

What was the application process like?

Getting the work experience was easy, I sent my CV and an application letter to my MP and explained why I wanted to do the placement, what I could bring to the placement and what my ultimate aim was by doing it. Whilst on work experience, I had to work hard and prove to my MP that I was a help rather than a hindrance and after that I was offered the internship.

How did you make your application stand out?

I mainly just wrote about how the experience would be beneficial and why I was particularly interested in this area of work. My CV also demonstrated that I have had a wide variety of experience in other areas, that I am a dedicated and enthusiastic worker and that I will fulfil all the tasks given to me to the best of my ability without whining about it.

but admittedly it did take a few hours to complete. I was required to submit roughly a 500 word personal statement to provide evidence of my skills/experience etc., which was a bit like an expanded CV. I also had to answer why I thought the placement would suit me/benefit me and so forth.

How did you make your application stand out? What advice would give you others?

I think being honest, clear and confident (but not cocky) was key to the success of my application. While I stated what key skills I had gained from my degree or extra-curricular experience (e.g. working for student radio/newspapers, contributing to blogs/keeping my own blog, transferable communication skills gained from my English degree etc.) I also said that I felt like a professional BBC placement would really help me develop what I had learnt so far.

I mentioned that doing a full-time degree can often limit the amount of time that I would like to spend planning my weekly radio show, and a professional work placement at the BBC would give me the freedom to learn about the particularities of radio production without being constrained by my studies. The biggest piece of advice I have is that you need to make yourself stand out by undertaking lots of mediarelated activities outside of your degree. If you balance your life between studying and partying – I hate to say it – but it’s probably not enough! It also goes without saying that you must make sure that you read up about the particular placement and make your answers relevant to it.

What advice would you give others?

I think the best advice I would give anyone was just that the worst people can say is no. I have done a lot of work experience but I have been rejected from just as much if not more, and I have got used to people saying no for sometimes silly little reasons. Just be passionate and determined and if you are really interested in what you are applying for it will come across.

Employers will notice it in your application and then (hopefully) realise it even more whilst you are working for them.

Annie Ward, Bsc Microbiology & Immunology What was your placement?

Laboratory assistant for the CBCB (centre for bacterial cell biology).

How did you find out about it?

The scheme was first mentioned in open days and also in introductory lectures during first year. Just after starting second year, an email from the biomedical sciences school office was sent out formally advertising the job. In this email was an attachment containing the laboratories and supervisors who were offering roles (about 17 in total) and a little description of the roles you’d have during the placement.

What was the application process like?

I researched all of the options using the biomedical sciences websites so I knew what each of the labs focussed on. As I’m a Medical Microbiology and Immunology student I applied for the Microbiol-

Lisa Bernhardt, BA Media, Communication and Cultural Studies What is your placement?

I’m going to spend about two weeks in the Channel 4 Online Department in the channel’s headquarters in Central London.

According to the website, it’s all about creating content for the main and several sub-websites by, for example, researching the web for ‘what’s hot’ or creating video clips.

How did you find out about it?

I’d already applied for a work placement at Channel 4 last year in autumn after attending an Open Day in Sheffield which was compulsory to be able to apply. I originally stumbled across Channel 4’s work experience opportunities by browsing the jobs section of its website.

What was the application process like?

In order to be eligible to apply for a work placement I had to apply for a place at an Open Day, so it was basically a two stage application process. Once I was accepted and attended the Open Day, I applied for a work placement online by answering a few selection questions.

How did you make your application stand out?

Apart from outlining my previous media experience (including writing for The Courier and Newcastle Student Radio), I was asked to state what special

ogy labs. I then decided upon a first, second and third choice and I attached a copy of my CV. The applicants were then shortlisted and interviewed.

How did you make your application stand out?

As this was my first science-based job my CV didn’t look very relevant so I added a paragraph about my enthusiasm for science, but as the job itself was for people who had never worked in a laboratory environment and the focus was on gaining skills, most of it came down to interview. At the interview I was dressed smart/casual with more emphasis on the smart, was very smiley, chatty and asked as many questions as I could.

I generally tried to show my enthusiasm for the subject area through the research I’d done on the lab group itself.

What advice would you give others?

The job gave me loads of valuable experience and was actually quite fun, so it’s well worth applying for. There are lots of people who do apply for so few jobs so make yourself stand out. As no one has experience they are looking for someone friendly who is going to enjoy what they’re doing, even if it can be basic at times.

qualities I can bring to the media industry.

I’m not from the UK, so I described how coming from another cultural background gives me a fresh, alternative perspective on affairs in the UK. What advice would you give others?

Questionnaire-style applications usually don’t give you much space to elaborate on you and your skills (200 words max per question on average), so your answers have to be spot on.

Furthermore, don’t be modest: Sell yourself as well as possible!

They want you, they just don’t know it yet.

Get your foot in the door!

Looking for something to do over summer? Wanting to do something to help boost your CV? JobZoo can offer you up-to-date and comprehensive details relating to the world of work including hundreds of job descriptions and valuable job hunting advice.

The Courier

Monday 7 May 2012

sex&relationshipslifestyle.19 Lifestyle Editors: Ben Parkin, Emma Balter, and Lauren Stafford Online Editor: Lauren Cordell in association with:

Blind Date Becca Latter, 2nd year Modern Language and Linguistics, meets Rory Brigstock-Barron, 3rd year History Becca on Rory

Rory on Becca

First impressions?

He came across well when we were texting beforehand and seemed very at ease when he came to pick me up. He’s easy to talk to, so I quickly felt comfortable in his company. He made a good first impression, which was a relief, since my housemates had spent hours winding me up with horror story scenarios.

First impressions?

My first impression on arrival at Becca’s front door was more one of her housemates: a chorus of screams came from the upstairs window as if Justin Bieber had just strolled up the garden path; he hadn’t. When Becca opened the door I was pleasantly surprised; she was pretty, and didn’t seem overly embarrassed by her friends’ best efforts to make it awkward, which made greetings a lot easier.

Did your date make any romantic gestures?

He walked to my house to pick me up before going for drinks. It seemed easier than trying to find someone you had never met in a busy bar and it was nice of him to take the detour anyway. He also paid for everything which was very gentlemanly - especially on a student budget!

Any striking conversation topics?

We talked about life in Newcastle, how we like the Uni and what it’s like living in Jesmond. I was glad he asked how I had got roped into going on the date because it turns out we both got persuaded by friends who write for The Courier.. We also discussed plans for next year; he’s graduating and I have a year abroad as part of my course, so we both have big changes coming up. Other than that, we just talked about the usual things.

Any awkward moments?

When Rory came by to pick me up, my housemates were all peering out of an upstairs window and, of course, started squawking and screaming when they saw him approach the door - very mature! The window was wide open and they shouted after us down the street. It could have been a very awkward start to the evening but he laughed it off.

If you were to get married and have babies, what would you want your baby to inherit from your date?

Definitely his approachability.

Rory’s really easy to talk to and made me feel much less nervous from the beginning. I think that’s a really valuable quality.

Did you open the ex-file?

Very briefly, but there were more interesting things to talk about so not much was said.

At any point did you understand why they were single?

He made a joking comment that people often think he’s gay on first impressions but judging by my screaming housemates not everyone thinks that! I’d say no, he seems like a nice guy and if he does have any horribly annoying habits, he’s learnt how to keep them well hidden - on the first date at least!

Were you tempted to lean in for a kiss?

I’m really not a fan of PDA! If you were to take them home do you think your parents would approve?

Rory’s really chatty and you have to be pretty talkative to get a word in edgeways with my family! For that reason I’d say he seems like he could definitely hold his own if he ever met the parents.

Marks out of 10?

7/10

Did your date make any romantic gestures?

Do girls make romantic gestures? She did suggest that we take the Metro home, which meant that I didn’t have to fork out for a taxi.

Any striking conversation topics?

Having somehow sensed that Becca was a vegetarian (“you’re not a vegetarian are you?”) I was bemused to discover that she hates animals, but just doesn’t like meat, eh?

Any awkward moments?

The staff at Pasqualino’s - who were very attentive – seemed extremely interested in how the date was going, which was initially a bit awkward.

They had even scribbled us in to the reservations book with a love heart between our names, which was nice of them. Considering the fact that we were never really drunk enough, there wasn’t much awkwardness. We must have talked for about five hours, which was great but meant I missed Match of the Day. That pissed me off, but it wasn’t Becca’s fault.

If you were to get married and have babies, what would you want your baby to inherit from your date?

Being an appalling linguist myself I would hope our children would inherit Becca’s ability to learn languages, as she speaks both Spanish and French. We also somehow ended up talking about the fact that we are both freakishly flexible, which could be a money maker if we trained the kids up for some kind of family circus.

Did you open the ex-file?

Yep, but we didn’t dwell, which is a good thing.

At any point did you understand why they were single?

Having slagged off couples a lot, I think it’s safe to say that we both embrace being single, and I don’t think Becca is someone who necessarily pursues relationships. Becca is pretty independent from what I could gather, but if she was looking for love, I’m sure she’d have no trouble finding it.

Were you tempted to lean in for a kiss?

To be honest, I don’t think a kiss would have gone with the tone of the rest of the date. The classic kiss on the cheek goodnight was employed at the end of a really fun evening.

If you were to take them home do you think your parents would approve?

Certainly, I’ve brought vegetarians home before and they didn’t kick off.

Marks out of 10?

7/10 – Becca is a great girl and I had a great evening, but the proverbial spark wasn’t really there. The search for ‘the one’ continues, jokes.

Tashin’ on in the Toon Victoria Mole Love pyrotechnics I’ve warned of the potential spanners and creepy pursuers that your love life can throw at you, and of the stories that will resurface during your hen-night so that your friends from university, as well as from home, will be fully clued up on every time you’ve declared yourself under house arrest due to embarrassment. However, I haven’t often delved into the territory of when Cupid gives you chemistry with someone who’s intoxicating rather than intoxicated...

If you retire from singledom and make it long-term (i.e. you’ve had to remember an anniversary), it takes regular maintenance to keep things heated. When Kate Hudson whipped out the love fern in How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days, you were perfectly within your rights to cringe; however, on a metaphorical level, long-term relationships need attention, otherwise they’ll suffer the same fate as the poor love fern (still note that presenting somebody with a plant in this way isn’t socially acceptable).

After some time you’ll have a full picture of your partner’s personality; after a really long time you’ll come to understand exactly why they are that way. When your beau starts bopping along to the little orange turd that loves life on the EDF advert, you realise just how much their ‘individuality’ is endearing. People usually couple up with those who neutralise their personality. If you’re a worrier, you’ll be compatible with someone laid-back, as being around them will naturally calm you down, and you’ll come in useful when they have deadlines cue the anti-procrastinator!

Finding a balance between having plenty in common and having enough differences is what’ll keep things harmonious and interesting. Communication and compromise are rightly preached to couples, though it’s wise to keep in mind that arguments, as long as they’re not frequent and are for good reason, show that you’re both invested enough in the relationship to care.

Moreover, idealising lovers to the extent that their flaws are easy to tolerate is key to making love last and it’s still possible to do so with a realistic perception. The sight of your sweetie’s toes poking out of the bed being enough to make you believe that you’re sleeping next to a yeti is something that most well-adjusted human beings can just about cope with; on the other hand, aggression should never be tolerated.

Believing that the grass is greener is like thinking that Burger King’s chips are better than McDonalds’ just because you haven’t tried them - don’t be fooled! Pining for the unavailable is hard to control, like saying no to riding a mechanical bull, but you’ll always thank yourself for doing it.

Love that’s lasted for a long time becomes unconditional and is fuelled by selflessness rather than a drive for self-fulfilment. Security is essential, but there should always be a tiny part of you that’s afraid to lose them.

Do something together that gives you an adrenaline rush; kiss as much as you did in the beginning; have enough space so that you miss each other sometimes; remember why you chose to be with them and appreciate the silly things they do to make you grin. Somewhere down the line we hope that the Bible verse ‘love is patient, love is kind...’ will apply to our situation, but until we get there: all’s fair in love and war, everything happens for a reason and hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…

20.fashion

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/fashion c2.fashion@ncl.ac.uk

campusfashion Sarah Fabes

Shirt: H&M, £20 Cardigan: Topshop, £36 Scarf: Debenhams, £18 Bag: Charity, £5 Shoes: Jones, £80 (on sale)

Second Year Geography and Planning

Miles Freeman #9 Swimwear – how European are you?

Somewhere behind these almost predictable April shower rain clouds lies a warm and hot summer that we will all hopefully get to enjoy, whether it’s at home or on foreign soil.

With warm weather comes the almost innate desire to wear as few clothes as possible, whether it’s by the sea, a pool or in a paddling pool at the front of your student house.

Whilst the majority of us Brits don’t have the most tanned or chiselled physiques, we waste no time in getting down to our swimwear for these occasions. For men, there are several varieties of swimwear to choose from, with each revealing a little bit more about your ‘personality’.

The classic board short is a staple amongst most men as it’s comfortable and often available in some of the freshest patterns on the market. Originally designed for surfing, the baggy style is now the popular choice and can be seen on all age ranges. Particularly popular in the USA, Australia and parts of the UK, board shorts are much frowned upon by our European counterparts. For some reason, the French, Germans and the occasional Russian lean more towards a tighter option.

Call them what you want: budgie smugglers, banana hammocks, Speedos or even nut-huggers, you would definitely be frowned on or even laughed at when wearing them by any beach or pool in the UK. But across the English Channel, it seems that the rule of thumb is the tighter the better. For us Brits, the only time these budgie smugglers become socially acceptable is when Tom Daley, Great Britain World Champion diver, is twisting and turning off his 10m board, representing our nation. For me, there is no summer circumstance where they are socially acceptable. I’m sure many of you would agree that seeing Monsieur Baguette or Herr. Bratwürst is not the highlight of your holidays.

There are, however, a swathe of Europeans that have found the happy medium between long and short. Often most frequently seen on the Riviera coastline, I introduce to you Mr. Vilebrequin. Luckily for us, Mr Vilebrequin has a sense of style and with this comes a realisation of which swimwear is appropriate for the public domain. The Vilebrequin trunk, whilst exponentially more expensive, is a mid-way length option that is available in a range of stylish patterns, stripes and colours.

With the availability of this more tasteful European option, I do have to pause and ask what the appeal is of the ‘sausage sling’?

Are those tiny little y-fronts a symbol of male pride, a masochistic display to ensure dominance over the beaches of Europe? I can only assume that these men who choose to wear banana hammocks still have the same pair they were bought as a 10-year-old child and are waiting for their mamas to get them a new pair for Christmas.

Finally I’d like to remind readers of the ultimate swimwear attire that comes under the never is, never was and never will be acceptable category. Available in lime green and first worn by Borat, the ‘mankini’ is the ultimate in ugly and the most embarrassing member of the Speedo family. At best they are remotely amusing when the wearer is picked up by the braces that go over the shoulders and dispatched in agony to rediscover his pride and self-respect!

Hannah Walsh

Top: Topshop, £6 Hoodie: Ralph Lauren, (present) Jacket: New Look, £30 Shorts: Topshop, £32 Bag: Present

What did you have in mind when you put this outfit together?

“I usually opt for a more earth-toned palette when I’m buying clothes, so this scarf is a fun alternative and gives my outfit a much-needed pop of colour!”

What did you have in mind when you put this outfit together?

“I tend to go for clothes that are a balance between practical and comfortable, as most of my day consists of lugging my kit to and from training sessions with the Boat Club.”

Fashionista’s Verdict?

“Back in the saddle: Izzy shows us equestrian at its best with her chunky marl knit teamed with a pair of classic riding-style boots. Channel your inner lady of the manor with layers of tweed, sheepskin and cable knit this spring to beat the chill!”

Fashionista’s Verdict?

“Sarah embraces pretty in pastels this spring, donning peppermint-striped hotpants and a basic jersey. For a fresh take on colour blocking, take inspiration from Phillip Lim’s Spring 2012 show and wear fondant shades head-to-toe.”

Izzy Cordes

Second Year Ancient History

On trend

Amanda Old spots bikinis galore to stop and stare for

Swimwear savvy

Urban Outfitters, £28

Topshop, £28

River Island, £28

Topshop, £26

The Courier

stylingfashion.21

Monday 7 May 2012

Fashion Editor: Victoria Mole Online Fashion Editor: Rosanna Sopp

Hannah Walsh presents the advice, the attitude and the accessories you need to be the belle of your ball

Ball dresses On a budget

to glide...

to flatter...

to flaunt...

to sparkle...

Topshop, £45 (with student discount)

+

Primark, £17

+

Primark, £25 Louche in Fenwicks, £65

+

Primark, £7

Primark, £4

Charity shop, £4

+

Urban Outfitters, £10 (with student discount)

Primark, £3 Topshop, £30 (on sale)

For petite figures, finding a dress with vertical pleats from the waist down will give the impression of longer legs and a belted waist will emphasise and create the illusion of an even tinier waist. This pleated floral maxi dress is perfect for shorter girls, as the contrasting belt and the pleats will give the appearance of height. If you have a petite figure, opt for a dress with the same print/colour throughout to avoid isolating your legs or torso.

Accessorize, £35 (with student discount)

A peplum waist dress doubles as the perfect solution for two types of body shapes: slender and curvy. For slim figures, the detailing around the waist will give an appearance of curves. For the curvier among us, the shape of the dress will hug you in all the right places and the peplum detail will smooth the hips and the stomach area. This electric blue shade from the Topshop range is a definite head turner for any ball.

Accessorize, £12 (with student discount)

This floral dress from Primark is a modern take on the classic maxi dress.

With a shorter cut at the front of the dress than the back, it is a great way to elegantly show off those beautifully toned legs without looking like you’re about to step foot inside Sinners! The muscle cut of the dress will draw attention to the area around the shoulders, and again the belt will give the impression of a smaller waist. A versatile dress, great for numerous shapes and sizes.

Capped-sleeve maxi dresses are perfect for those with apple or pear-shaped figures. The extra fabric around the top of the dress will narrow shoulders and the cut of the dress will draw the attention away from a large bust. Choosing a dress with a block colour above and below the waist is great for taller girls; as a style that shortens the torso, they can highlight long, elegant limbs. This block colour maxi from Primark is a steal, as the chain detailing around neck and waist means you can get away with wearing no jewellery at all and still look fabulous!

The Courier

health&beauty.23

Monday 7 May 2012

health&beauty editor: Rosanna Sopp rosanna.sopp@ncl.ac.uk

Skinted

Ball Basics

Hannah Walsh explores the bare necessities for your purse to make you fully equipped for dancing the night away

Top 5

Beauty items of 2012 so far

Primer Vaseline Lip Therapy (£1.80, Boots) A handbag essential, whether you need to smooth flyaway hairs, soften lips or moisturise chapped skin on the go-this does everything!

Primark False Eyelashes £1.00

Benefit Porefessional £23.50 for 22ml A makeup primer should be applied after moisturising to cover up any blemishes and imperfections- it is the best way to ensure your makeup stays put and will give you that flawless airbrushed finish. Benefit’s best selling silky lightweight formula is great alone or under make-up and can also be used over make-up to touch up during the evening.

Lips Revlon Lip Butter £7.99

Concealer Lasting Perfection Concealer Collection 2000 £4.19 A good quality concealer will work wonders.

Opt for a product with a hint of green to balance out any redness or a shade lighter than your skin tone to hide those dark under eye circles. This ultimate wear concealer from Collection 2000 has been raved about in the blogging world, and for under £5 you can’t really complain.

Ardell Fashion Lash False Eye Lashes - Demi Black (101) £5.20

Foundation

Shu Uemura Black Velvet Feather False Eyelashes £18.50

Minted

Best Beauty Blogs www.beautybanter.com www.nomoredirtylooks.com www.intothegloss.com

Bargain of the week

Revlon Photoready Foundation £9.99 for 30ml A good foundation that matches your skin tone is another beauty must-have and is the key to flawless perfected skin. If you are worried about your face appearing white under a camera flash you should avoid products containing SPF. ‘Photoready Foundation’ from Revlon gives medium to full coverage and has a beautiful dewy finish, giving a healthy glow. For a more matt finish opt for the Colourstay Foundation from Revlon instead.

Finishing Spray Fix+ MAC £7 for 30ml Many people forget about this final step but it is essential to set your foundation with either a powder or a finishing spray. Powders are fine but depending on your skin tone you might find they appear cakey in photographs. ‘Fix+’ spray from MAC has a gorgeous fresh scent infused with green tea and chamomile and will add that extra boost of radiance to your makeup look.

Face Bobbi Brown Shimmer Brick £30.50

Tools Real Techniques Stippling Brush £10.99

Eyes

Maybelline Colour Tattoo 24HR £4.99

Mascara Spot Remover

www.groupon.co.uk contains plenty of great deals on spa and health treatments, hair salons, and many more!

Origins Super Spot Remover £12 for 10ml Breakouts the night before the big day are a beauty nightmare so it is essential you have a reliable spot remover on standby. This tiny bottle of spot zapping formula works wonders and is great for all skin types. Just apply before you go to bed and you will notice the difference in the morning.

Benefit ‘They’re Real’ Mascara £18.50

24.listings7th-13thMay

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/listings c2.editor@ncl.ac.uk

Monday Power of Place exhibition Mon-Sat 10am - 5pm Hatton Gallery

Ongoing exhibition until 19 May 2012: ‘Power of Place: Representing and Experiencing the World’. Curated by MA students from the International Centre for Cultural and Heritage Studies. Free Admission.

Karima Francis 7pm Cluny 2

Manchester-based acoustic/alternative singer, songwriter and guitarist with a very distinctive voice. Band features Karima on vocals/guitar and Simon Robbs on guitars. Tickets £7. www.thecluny.co.uk

Tuesday BioSoc Ball

Wildboyz

BioSoc cordially invites you to the highlight of the social calendar – their summer ball!

Last year was a sell-out with Dr Bevan outlasting most of you on the dance floor. Spaces are limited so don’t leave it too late. Formal dress - everyone is invited! Tickets are a mere £26, including champagne on arrival, half a bottle of wine per person, local Northumbrian-themed buffet, vintage style photobooth with free prints all night and DJ. Tickets are available from Students’ Union reception (cash only).

Head along to the World Premier of Wildboyz a hilarious new adult comedy starring our four hunks Alex Reid (reality TV star) Marcus Patrick (Hollyoaks) Danny Young (Coronation Street/Dancing on Ice) and Dale Howard (Big Brother) as themselves. Wildboyz is “The Full Monty meets Ibiza”. www.newcastlecityhall.org

7pm The Venue

For over 50 years after the Second World War, America and Europe dominated the global agenda. With the economic resurgence of Asia – particularly China and India – this has fundamentally changed.

How can Britain and Europe cope with the new realities of economic power? www.ncl.ac.uk/events

8pm Theatre Royal

Dubbed a ‘psychological illusionist’ by the press, Derren Brown is a performer who combines magic, suggestion, psychology, misdirection and showmanship in order to seemingly predict and control human behaviour, as well as performing mind-bending feats of mentalism. Following sell-out performances Derren hits the road again with the second leg of the tour that started in 2011 - Derren Brown: Svengali. www.theatreroyal.co.uk

Twenty Twenty 7pm O2 Academy Newcastle

The three piece pop-punk band are rocking up to the O2 Academy this week so grab your Converse and studded belt and get ready to dance away your exam and dissertation worries! www.o2academynewcastle.co.uk

Thursday

7pm Newcastle City Hall

Homemade Jam 8pm Mens Bar, Students’ Union

Homemade Jam is back - except this time they’ve added karaoke! Every Thursday. www.nusu.co.uk/events

Britain, Europe and the New Global Balance

5.30pm Curtis Auditorium, Herschel Bldg

Derren Brown Svengali

Wednesday

Get your Grad Ball tickets!

Student Wellbeing Day 10am-4pm Students’ Union

Give It A Go and Student Wellbeing have dedicated a whole day to making you happier at Uni. Free head massages available all day at NUSU.

10am Outside the Students’ Union

Come and collect your Grad Ball Summer Fest 2012 ticket, promising to be the perfect end to your time at Newcastle Uni! With a champagne reception, three course meal, fairground, unlimited popcorn and candyfloss, famous name DJ (keep a look out!) and much much more, this is not to be missed. Get involved and get excited, the festival season has begun! Tickets cost £70. www.nusu.co.uk

The Courier

7th-13thMaylistings.25

Monday 7 May 2012

C2 Editor: Aimee Philipson

Friday British Independent Film Festival 2012 8.30pm Empire Cinema

On the 11 and 12 May 2012 the Film Festival Guild is bringing its annual British Independent Film Festival to the Empire cinema in Newcastle. We have 14 films involved in the festival, screening over a period of two days, with BAFTA award winning directors, producers and actors involved. www.filmfestivalguild.com

Something for the weekend Tynemouth Food Festival Sat and Sun, 9am-4.30pm Tynemouth

A two day foodie festival in the village of Tynemouth with 40 stalls in the Queen Victoria Square (leave the Metro on the beach side and turn left), two days of local celebrity chef demonstrations at a mobile kitchen in King’s School grounds, a Mad Hatter’s Tea Party for children, chocolate demonstration by Gareth James, festival events throughout the village with discounts and special food and drink dishes on offer. Come along and join in the fun at the first ever Tynemouth Food Festival and help us to put our village on the map!

Looking forward to...

NUSU Student Media Awards

May 14, 7.30pm The Venue

The annual Media Awards is a fantastic event, not only rewarding the hundreds of volunteers who work on The Courier, NSR and TCTV throughout the year, but also providing a networking opportunity amongst the members of the media industry and successful former graduates due to attend the event. This year includes Diane Nelmes, the queen of daytime TV and former Editor of The Courier Stuart Vose as guest speakers. There’s also a chance to win a hotel stay, restaurant vouchers and champagne in the raffle.

Newcastle Graduate Recruitment Fair

June 11, 10.30am-4.30pm Bamburgh Suite, Level 4, Newcastle United Football Club

Come along and meet employers from a wide range of sectors offering immediate graduate positions, as well as organisations offering further study and training opportunities. A list of exhibitors attending the event will be on www.ncl.ac.uk/careers nearer the time.

A Tale of Two Hamlets

June 11 and 12, 7.30pm The Venue

A comic/musical retelling of Shakespeare’s Hamlet by Richard Temperley, featuring ghosts, actors, fairy godmothers, dodgy uncles and a bloke in a dress, performed by Newcastle University’s Gilbert & Sullivan Society. All tickets £5, on the door or email nugss@ncl.ac.uk.

Comedy Benefit Night May 14, 7pm The Stand

Midnight Walk Dara O’Briain Thurs, Fri, Sat, 8pm Newcastle City Hall

Following 2010’s 150 date sell-out tour of the UK & Ireland and best selling DVD ‘This Is The Show’ Irish funnyman Dara O’Briain hits the road again with a brand new show for 2012. Dara is one of the most recognisable faces of British TV, hosting Mock The Week, The Apprentice – Your Fired, Stargazing Live and starring in 3 Men in a Boat. Catch one of the most charismatic, intelligent, fast-talking and down right funny live performers working in the British Isles today. www.newcastlecityhall.org

Enjoy local legend Dave Johns, comedy veteran and star of Never Mind the Buzzcocks and 8 out of 10 Cats, as he returns to split our sides. Joined by our hilarious host Matt Reed as he kicks off the night of North Eastern comedy with deadpan comedian John Whale and fellow Geordies Nick Cranston and Lee Kyle. Tickets are limited and all proceeds will go to The Cyrenians, a charity supporting homeless and vulnerable people in the North East. Tickets cost £7. www.thestand.co.uk

July 7 Civic Centre

Join the annual 10k Midnight Walk around the city centre in aid of St Oswald’s Hospice.

A fantastic way to get fit and raise money for a local charity! £15 per entry. For registration and more information please Contact Lyn Cain on 0191 2469123 or email lyncain@stoswaldsuk.org

Make and Mend Market (Fashion Week Special) June 2 Grainger Market

Newcastle’s biggest independent arts, crafts & vintage market is going all out for Newcastle Fashion Week in June. Promising stall after stall of independent, vintage, retro, stylish, creative clothes and accessories, make sure you get there quick to grab the best stuff. Look them up on Facebook for latest info. Free entry, as always!

@CourierListings

26.arts

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/arts c2.arts@ncl.ac.uk

Art-e-facts Throw away

10 facts you never knew about the world of art and literature

1. Shakespeare invented the words ‘torture’ and ‘brilliance’

Not only a prolific playwright but also a major contributor to our vocabulary.

2. Venus de Milo is the statue that has offered the most ‘sexual inspiration’

If any of you are unsure what I mean by ‘sexual inspiration’, let me put it another way, this was before RedTube was invented.

3. Milton created the word ‘pandemonium’

Who would have thought the man who bored us senseless with Paradise Lost was also the man who is responsible for the name of the most infamous Freshers’ week night.

4. The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows

She may be worth millions, have fascinated people the world over for generations and be renowned for her beauty, but I have eyebrows and she doesn’t, so I think we all know who won.

5. The first book published is thought to be the Epic of Gilgamesh

Written at about 3000 BC in cuneiform, an alphabet based on symbols. And it is thanks to the creation of this book that we have Harry Potter (with a few steps in between).

6. Picasso’s Full Name Has 23 Words

So anyone who thinks they are fancy because they have a double-barrelled surname, well Picasso has stolen their thunder big time.

7. To save costs, dramatist Ben Jonson was buried standing up In Westminster Abbey, London in 1637.

Therefore, the moral of this story is that you can be as famous as you like, but if your family are cheap skates they will still

8. Louvre Museum is actually a fort The internationally renowned art museum in France was originally built as a Fortress for Philippe Auguste in 1190; that is defi-

9. Dennis Hwang is the utter genius behind the special Google Need I say more?

10. Thomas Nast is the man behind Father Christmas

Obviously not literally, but the eighteenth century political cartoonist was actually the man who changed the colour of Father Christmas’ infamous suit to red, over half a century before Coca Cola got in on the act.

Sally Priddle

summer thrills

For many of us, summer is the only time we pick up a book, but packing to go on holiday always seems to be much easier than packing for the journey home. Here are some fantastic reads cheap enough to litter the globe with

May Contain Nuts John O’Farrell

Poirot Agatha Christie

I am not suggesting that this book would satisfy anyone’s desire to be philosophically meaningful, but John O’Farrell’s May Contain Nuts is a heart warming story that had me laughing out loud whilst sat next to a pool, slowly burning to a crisp.

This book tells the tale of an eccentric mother who is permanently panic-stricken by all the dramas of the modern world that may cause harm to her daughter, and this leads her on a crazy trail of life that is an utterly irresistible story that will make you never want children but is guaranteed to entertain. £1.57 at Play.com Sally Priddle

Perused once, an Agatha Christie novel cannot be reread, which is why they are perfect for taking abroad and exchanging them in various hostels on your travels.

The Poirot series are ideal for beginning with, giving you lovable characters to return to and, it goes without saying, a gripping mystery to unfold.

Perfect for beaches, mountains or wherever it is you are visiting this summer, but maybe not if you are camping alone in a forest. £2.81 at Amazon.com Mallory McDonald

Blood, Sweat and Tea Tom Reynolds

P.S I Love You Cecelia Ahern

Blood, Sweat and Tea is a compilation of the funniest, quirkiest and most moving blog entries of real-life paramedic Tom Reynolds, following the highs and lows of life as a front line medic. From coughs and colds, to heart attacks and stabbings, to a toxic poo and a mother feeding her week-old baby apple pie it’s all in a day’s work for Tom. Ok, so a cynical but fascinating picture of the NHS and inner-city Britain is not your typical holiday read, but it’s hilarious and addictive and you’ll be buying the sequel by the time the plane lands. £2.81 at Play.com Danielle Crispin

Don’t judge, and if you have only watched the film, then I am afraid you do not have the real image of this book. P.S I Love You is a clever, witty and heart-touching book, and just to cling on to all clichés going, this story is a real roller coaster of emotion. The tale surrounds the life of Holly, a young widow who has recently lost her husband Gerry to cancer.

Gerry has planned for a letter to arrive for Holly every month that gives her advice, a task or treat. It is an inspiring romance that will inspire hope even into the coldest heart. £1.37 at Amazon.co.uk Sally Priddle

Confessions of a Working Girl Miss S

Shantaram Gregory David Roberts The perfect summer escapism novel, Shantaram is the semi-autobiographical story of Lin, an Australian convict who escapes prison and flees to Mumbai. Whether you’ve been to India before, always wanted to go or even know nothing about the country, this will bring the magic of the subcontinent alive in an enthralling and moving tale of love, war, poverty and the black market in the slums of the most fascinating city in the world. £3.72 at Amazon.co.uk Catherine Davison

This is for the braver people than me, basically, those who can bear to read about sex without blushing insanely and looking around as if everyone around you is judging you for being a horrible perverted person. But the confessions of Miss S are a fascinating insight into the world of an escort, including how a young woman falls into the world and all the different sides to the world, including losing her virginity, learning the skills of a blowjob and how her Madam always made sure she was safe. Grim in aspects but mainly a total page turner, I would suggest it is a one time read indulgence. £1.57 at Amazon.co,uk Sally Priddle

One Day David Nicholls David Nicholls’ best seller tells the story of Dexter and Emma’s relationship over twenty years, and is a perfect tale of coincidence and romance. It’s a hugely endearing account of love and friendship that you can guarantee to get swept away by, making it just right for lounging by the pool or sitting in the garden and letting time just fly by.

And if you haven’t yet seen the film or haven’t encountered one of those plotspoiling friends, be prepared for a sun lounger-grabbing twist. £2.81 at Amazon.co.uk Grace Harvey

Neither Here Nor There Bill Bryson Very few writers have the ability to make an instant connection with the reader, but take a quick glance at Bryson’s Neither Here Nor There and you’ll be hard pushed to want to part with it. This collection of stories about his travels around Europe will have you literally laughing out loud, with his keen observations, humorous take on European culture and a writing style that immediately immerses the reader. With the chapters divided into countries visited, the book can be picked up and dipped into at any time and this makes the whole book very digestible. But with that said, you’ll find it hard to put this book down, making it ideal for long journeys. £1.23 at Amazon,co.uk Chris Scott

The Courier

arts.27

Monday 7 May 2012

Arts Editor: Sally Priddle Online Arts Editor: Lisa Bernhardt

previews Pause: Fine Art Degree Show

A

Hatton Gallery 1-16 June

lthough some of you may mock or scoff at any degree that doesn’t have BSc written after it, final year Fine Art students are here to prove you wrong and show you the wealth of talent they have to offer.

The Hatton Gallery will play host to the fourth years’ creativity and therefore, as it’s central to the University (located in the quad), there really is no excuse for missing out on viewing the wealth of artistic talent students have to offer.

Not only have these students worked tirelessly to create the final pieces for their show, but throughout the year they have been raising money through their own ventures in order to take the show to the bright lights of London. If you’re drowning under the weight of work at the moment, you can alternatively enjoy a smaller selection of their output when the show travels down to The Rag Factory in the trendy Brick Lane area of London from 3-6 July, if you’re looking for some culture over your summer break.

This year’s show is entitled Pause, which Dr Venda Pollock, head of history of art within the school, explains as such, ‘the degree show can be viewed as a monumental pause, a deep intake and holding of breath, prior to whatever lies ahead, or the final play in what has been for these artists four years of intensive work encompassing a range of practice-based experiments and assignments, historical and theoretical studies and various types of professional practice experience.’ It could be argued that this exhibition allows the artists to sit back and reflect on their achievements and development over the past four years, and their time at university, and only through ‘pausing’ can anyone fully appreciate this.

With the practice-based structure of the course, students are really encouraged to take their work in whatever direction they desire, and this is evident in the plethora of different media which are demonstrated in the show from more traditional oil paintings, via sculpture to live performance. The final year students have chosen their favourite means of producing art to express their work and development to you.

Emily Thornton (whose work is seen above) is a painter who presents an exploration of the vacillation between abstraction and figurative. This year she has undertaken ambitious projects such as a series of 24-hour painting stints in the studio. Emily is currently working on six large scale canvases (7x7ft) for the degree show. Below is the work of Paul Johnson who uses a video installations to make a comment on twenty-first century living. He is currently interested in our obsession with ‘reality’ TV; Paul takes the role of director in his own staged film sets.

Paul plans to build a walk-in green room for the final show.

The output of these 48 final year students will incite various reactions within all, dazzling, confusing, delighting and much more. Why not join the artistic debate, and pause to support and appreciate the work of the potentially great artists of tomorrow.

Catherine Langley

Save the Last Dance For Me

F

Sunderland Empire

or all of you ballet film and Julia Stiles-fans in particular, curb your excitement: This show has nothing to do with the 2001 dance movie Save the Last Dance.

It is, in fact, the spinoff to the jukebox musical Dreamboats and Petticoats that hit the stage at the Empire last year. The latter was the admittedly cheesy story of teenage love woes in the 1960s, accompanied by lots of feelgood tunes, colourful costumes and hairstyles as hard as cement. And Save the Last Dance For Me - well, it seems that it will be similarly light-hearted entertainment.

The story of two young sisters who meet a handsome Air Force soldier during their summer holidays in a resort in 1963 somewhat resembles THE ultimate innocent-girl-has-first-romantic-encounter-during-summer-holidays-and-ohthere’s-also-some-passionate-swayinginvolved-Dirty Dancing-esque flick.

So if you’re into classic Rock’n’Roll, retro clothing and fairly predictable love stories, take a break from the mid-May revision and essay stress to make your way down to Sunderland and let this fun-filled musical brighten up your rainy day.

Lisa Bernhardt

reviews

Avenue Q

A

venue Q was written and staged originally in America and was expected to be slightly too much for us delicate Brits. However, after winning a Tony Award, having rave reviews and enormous success in the West End and nationwide, the show has proved itself to be a hit with all races, genders and (most) ages – quite impressive for a show which gently and humorously insults everyone.

The musical follows the somewhat hopeless but loveable residents of the street – who have slowly lowered their expectations from Avenue A all the way down through the alphabet until they ended up in the world of Avenue Q. Trying to make sense of life’s issues and with a weird and wonderful mix of both puppet and human friends, the star of the show; recent college grad Princeton, bumbles through life, distracted momentarily by Lucy the Slut but making friends and realising fundamental truths about life – such as that Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist and really, the Internet is just for porn. The show is ridiculously funny, rude and perfect for anyone who has ever wondered just how you are meant to pay the bills with a BA in English.

Clare Deal

Henry V

T

Theatre Royal April 25

he all-singing, all-male Propeller Theatre returned to the Theatre Royal with a visually stunning performance of Henry V. Combining Shakespeare’s extensive monologues with unexpected renditions of London Calling and Rule Britannia, the company gave an explosive edge to the classic story of the greatest British warrior in English folklore.

The use of music throughout the performance powerfully conveyed the play’s themes of patriotism and war. The choral singing of the cast was employed on stage as part of both the church and war scenes, and even carried into the interval for an impromptu performance in the bar.

Henry himself was portrayed convincingly, the contrast between the warrior and the naïve, socially-inept man being revealed as he attempted to woo his newly-captured princess. The two female characters provided a comedy element, being portrayed in one instance by a well-built, lumbering man and in the other by a comically delicate, younger actor.

Propeller’s interpretation of Henry V was visually impressive and stunningly executed. A definite must-see for both Shakespeare veterans and theatrephobes.

Rosie Tallant

Theatre Royal 22-26 May

National Dance Company Wales Triple Bill

W

Dance City 17-18 May

ales’ National Dance Company are a fiery, dynamic and entrancing dance show, created by world- class choreographers and performed by the Company’s 12 international dancers.

Choreographer Ohad Naharin presents to us B/olero and Black Milk. B/olero is a female duet; the two dancers interact in perfect harmony to create a sharply cut rhythmical explosion set to Ravel’s famous score. Black Milk is perfomed by five male dancers, an athletic and lively dance saturated with tribal imagery, lacing together male aggression and physicality with a pure sophistication.

Eleesha Drennan and collaborating artist Sue Williams create Phantoms of Us, a physically demanding and intense work with powerful movement performed by 8 dancers. Solo dances and ensembles are accompanied by rhythmic percussion, lively jazz and smooth strings.

This intense and original dance show, hailed as ‘pure contemporary genius’ by The Guardian, will leave you enthralled and entranced on the edge of your seat.

Amy Bolton

Tom Stade

A night out like no other

he packed out crowd at The Stand weren’t just treated to one superb comedy act last Tuesday evening, but two.

Tom Stade’s show was brilliantly supported by comedian Mick Ferry , who did a great job warming up the crowd with a routine filled with a mixture of adult humour, witty one-liners and self-deprecating storytelling.

Stade’s performance was a lengthy hour-long routine without breaks, but he managed to fill the time efficiently with non-stop jokes, many of which involved members of the audience, whether they were willing or not. His material shows real promise ahead of his DVD out later in the year, and was a perfect blend of shocking, almost scandalous, content with short bursts of stories about marriage, shopping in Primark, the English perception of Canadians and of course, the trademark and ever-hilarious ‘meat van’ sketch at the end.

The show went down very well with the audience who lapped up very second, and part of this was down to the way he instantaneously built a rapport with the entire audience, with his levels of confidence and charm. My ribs are still hurting from laughing and my face is still sore from smiling all, which can only be a good thing.

Chris Scott

oasting spectacular female impersonations supported by a talented chorus of show boys and girls, Boulevard guarantees a night out like no other. The show for Spring 2012 is an eclectic mix of musical numbers with a burlesque twist, unmistakably camp, adorned with flashing lights and more glitz than the average club could handle.

Proceedings began with Miss Rory, our host and DJ for the evening. She was glamorous and pithy and had a phenomenally large hair-do. She did her best to warm up a slightly apprehensive crowd, picking on members of the audience (but thankfully not our table). Huge larger-than-life effigies of Fred Astaire and Ginger Rodgers stared at down at us from the walls as we listened to ABBA and waited for the main attraction, the one and only Miss Betty Legs Diamond.

The first number was an impressive homage to Chicago, complete with high leg kicks, a sultry jazz soundtrack and a uniform of vintage black underwear to suit.

It was a surreal experience and each performance seemed to get a little stranger, including a Little Mermaid medley and an interesting interpretation of Michael Jackson’s Thriller. Undeniably it was a fun way to spend (what would have otherwise been) a dreary Thursday evening.

Lauren Stafford

T

The Stand May 1

B

Boulevard Club April 26

28.musicreviews

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

Music Editors: Ben Travis and Chris Scott Online Music Editor: Graham Matthews

Boys & Girls

Five reasons why...

Alabama Shakes

... Lady Gaga might benefit from a couple of months aboard the good ship Calm The Fuck Down 1) The whole ‘isn’t Gaga a bit mad’ thing is wearing thin.

Being slightly crackers was Gaga’s USP (see: the Kermit coat; arriving at the Grammys in an egg; having prosthetic horns sculpted onto herself), but now it all seems a bit forced and contrived.

Frankly, she pales in comparison to the very genuine mental instability of ex-Corrs guitarist Jim Corr, who now splits his time between sailing and attempting to convince anyone who’ll listen of the veracity of any number of conspiracy theories. You name it, Jim believes it: that 9/11 was an inside job, that “Edwin Poots the Northern Irish Sickness Minister wants to chemically lobotomise the citizens of NI and dramatically increase cancer and sterility rates by adding sodium fluoride to the water supply”, that the government is artificially inflating the price of Freddos. Possibly it was the strain of having to be the ugly, boring one in the Corrs who got the piss ripped out of him on SM:TV every week which pushed him over the edge.

H

eavily touted for the number one slot in the UK album chart upon its release, the debut album from American rock band Alabama Shakes has certainly caused a stir amongst music critics. Boys & Girls, released by independent record label Rough Trade Records, showcases a band firmly on the road to success.

Following the lead of other major southern rock success stories over the past few years, such as Kings of Leon and The Black Keys, their soulful bluesy sound suggests they’ve arrived on the music scene at just the right time.

Indeed, it only takes one listen of this record to realise the potential this group possess. Hailing rather unsurprisingly from Athens, Alabama, the outfit, comprising of lead vocalist Brittany Howard, guitarist Heath Fogg, bassist Zac Cockrell and drummer Steve Johnson, look set to gain the recognition they deserve.

The album’s gospel-like lead single ‘Hold On’ is a must-listen and highlights their undoubtedly mainstream appeal. The instantly hooky bass line has a certain groove to it and takes the song to another level. There is simply nothing overcomplicated about the track. The passion is there and the belief is there, and that is all that’s needed for success.

Howard’s sumptuous vocals are not too dissimilar to those of the late Amy Winehouse on the soulful, chilled out, ‘You Ain’t Alone,’ whilst the intense, fast-paced finale to album closer ‘On Your Way’ shows the diversity they possess and a possible taste of things to come.

Marcus Collins

Radlands Mystery Jets

Marcus Collins

2) The album artwork for Born This Way. “OK guys, I’ve got a vision for what the new album cover’s going to look like.” That’s great Gaga, shoot. “So it’s a black background...” Yep, good, black. Sleek, sophisticated, modern, understated. “...and there’s this motorbike...” Brilliant! Rock ‘n’ roll! Rebellion! This is going to be amazing! “...and then in the middle of the handlebars, we badly Photoshop a picture of my face.” Er... right. We’ll sort that out. “Oh, and can you make the actual title of the album look like something from the front of a straight-to-DVD sci-fi release? Cheers.”

3) She might then have the time to have some ideas of her own.

Picking up tidbits, magpie-like, from other artists is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Everybody does it. Elvis Costello nicked his look wholesale from Buddy Holly. Paul McCartney took his head-wobbling ‘ooooh’s from Little Richard.

Likewise, the little nods to Vogue-era Madonna were fun at the start, but just rewriting ‘Hey Jude’ (see ‘You & I’) and stealing Annie Lennox’s idea of dressing up as a man who looks a bit like Elvis simply will not do.

4) Encroaching jazz-fusion horror.

I doubt anyone who saw Gaga at Radio 1’s Big Weekend last year was thinking, “I’m bloody sick of ‘Bad Romance’, I hope she only does about 90 seconds of it and then wastes half an hour doing Nat King Cole covers clumsily customised to be about the royal wedding.”

5) As this is the last column, here are some other people I hate.

Fred Durst; Phil Collins (divorced his wife by fax); Pitbull; Flo Rida; The Voice’s Danny O’Don’tKnow-Who-You-Are-Pal; Olly Murs; The Script; Mumford & Sons; The Courteeners; Viva Brother; Liam Gallagher; Jim Morrison; Frank Turner.

And finally, if I ever get the chance, I swear I’ll kick David Guetta so hard in the groin that his cock and balls resemble the blade of a tiny shovel and two mini cheddars.

Tom Nicholson

T

Gospel-like lead single ‘Hold On’ is a must listen and highlights their undoubtedly mainstream appeal With easily-identifiable musical influences ranging from The Rolling Stones to artists including the likes of Adele and Otis Redding, it is clear that the blues-rockers cover all the bases while still managing to produce something different.

Clocking in at just over 36 minutes, it is no long record by any stretch of the imagination. What it does manage to achieve, however, is a pure sound that has the potential to be even better on the live stage.

This is definitely not the last you will hear of Alabama Shakes.

Recommended download: ‘Hold On’

Matty Aston

Little Broken Hearts Norah Jones

M

N

he first album from this year’s X Factor lot is a hit-and-miss affair, full of inoffensive Motown ditties, highly offensive Motown travesties, and a few controversial covers for good measure.

Collins’ version of ‘Seven Nation Army’ has already caused a bit of uproar from the kind of sweaty rock apes who are wont to cause uproar, but let’s be honest: it’s 2012, we’re all very sick of ‘Seven Nation Army’. On the other hand, ‘Tightrope’ without Janelle Monáe is like a Spicy Italian sandwich from Subway: still awesome, but a BMT is the same price, and it has ham.

At its best, the album touches on real, honestto-god funk. ‘Mercy’ gives Marcus a real vocal workout, showcasing his formidable soulful voice, although it’s too shiny and clean to really channel the soul greats. Gary Barlow’s contribution, ‘Feel Like I Feel’, is proper, sexy disco funk, and he really should have produced the whole album.

Unfortunately, Barlow’s hand is nowhere near the conspicuously soulless Take That-alike ballad, ‘Don’t Surrender’. Worse still is ‘That’s Just Life’, which kicks off with an impossibly naff round of ‘do do do’s and only gets worse from there. It sounds like H from Steps presenting CBeebies live from Butlins Skegness. It single-handedly robs this album of a star.

ystery Jets have been renowned for their quirkiness. Twenty One featured ‘Two Doors Down’, a Duran Duran-inspired pastel pop song which perfectly describes Mystery Jets’ “thing”.

But when Radlands’ opening track of the same name kicks in with an intro oddly reminiscent of Radiohead’s ‘Weird Fishes/Arpeggi’, you know something’s changed here. This isn’t the quirky, fun-loving Mystery Jets we grew to love. This is, as front man Blaine Harrison describes it, “Mystery Jets MK III”.

Radlands seems to wear its influences on its sleeves; dashes of Belle & Sebastian here, huge dollops of Fleetwood Mac there. Fleetwood Mac and other bands with an Americana feel definitely play a big part here, with one or two songs that wouldn’t sound out of place on Mirage.

It’s a shame the album loses steam towards the end. ‘You Had Me At Hello’ is one of the standout darker tracks, but there are a few quirky tracks that do work quite well, such as the genuinely fantastic ‘Greatest Hits’ which is an ode to the dreaded post-break up division of records which features the fantastic line “No way you’re having This Nation’s Saving Grace/You only listen to it when you’re p*ssed/But when you sober up it’s always/‘Why the f**k are you still listening to Mark E Smith?’”

orah Jones is most definitely a marmite artist; you either love her or hate her.

And as much as this ruins my music reviewer ‘rep’, I’m definitely on the loving side.

Sporting a new Sophie Ellis Bexter-esque hairdo and her new album having been produced by Dangermouse (Grammy award-winner and producer of albums for the likes of Gorillaz), it seems like Miss Jones is taking a step in a different direction. However, this album is a bit of mix. Some tracks such as ‘Broken Hearts’ highlight Norah’s strong vocals and show that she’s made a real progression, but on the other hand a few of the tracks blend into one and it all becomes a bit samey.

This album seems like it’s been rushed a little and some really golden tracks won’t be appreciated, as they’re hidden amongst songs that have not quite got the same power. Basically I listened to the album on repeat and when I switched it off I couldn’t remember a single chorus, whereas one listen of ‘Call Me Maybe’ and it’s in my head for days.

Not that I’m setting that as any kind of standard for good music of course. I wouldn’t say it was a bad album, I just think she should stick with where she really excels and not try to change her style when she already had something really good going.

Recommended download: ‘Feel Like I Feel’

Recommended download: ‘Greatest Hits’

Recommended download: ‘Happy Pills’

Sam Summers

For tonnes of web-exclusive columns and live reviews, check out The Courier music section online.

Chris Taylor

Cassie Lawrence

Follow The Courier music section on Twitter - @TheCourierMusic

Gig announcements, updates on the Newcastle music scene, track recommendations and exclusive articles.

Oh, and plenty of #hashtags!

The Courier

featuresmusic.29

Monday 7 May 2012

thecourieronline.co.uk/music c2.music@ncl.ac.uk

Call me, maybe?

On the record

Don’t pretend you haven’t used Carly Rae Jepsen’s lyrics as a chat-up line when you’re feeling at your smoothest in Sinners here are a few others to try, and even more to avoid “I’m just a moth who wants to share your light”- Radiohead, ‘All I Need’ Verdict: Cute, if a bit needy

Sweet

Classic album Fresh perspective

Until last week, I had never listened to Willennium

by Will Smith

“If you change your mind, I’m the first in line, honey I’m still free, take a chance on me”- ABBA, ‘Take a Chance On Me’ Verdict: Nice but a little desperate “Boom boom boom boom, I want you in my room”- Vengaboys, ‘Boom Boom Boom Boom’ Verdict: Old school and filthy, but that works for some people

“If a double decker bus crashes in to us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die”- The Smiths, ‘There Is A Light That Never Goes Out’ Verdict: A bit creepy, but romantic

“Let’s turn this room into a pirate ship and plunder each other”- Zolof the Rock and Roll Destroyer, ‘Argh I’m a Pirate’ Verdict: Brilliantly witty, nicely piratey

“I wrote the song two hours before we met, I didn’t know your name or what you looked like yet”- Pulp, ‘Something’s Changed’ Verdict: Not quite romantic, but honest

“Don’t marry her, fuck me”- The Beautiful South, ‘Don’t Marry Her’ Verdict: Cheeky

“I love it when you call me big poppa”Notorious B.I.G., ‘Big Poppa’ Verdict: A bit weird

“I wanna be the papa, you can be the mom”- Sean Paul, ‘Temperature’ Verdict: Too much parental emphasis “Come on baby light my fire”- The Doors, ‘Light My Fire’ Verdict: It might actually work in Sinners “Every breath you take and every move you make, every bond you break, every step you take, I’ll be watching you”- The Police ‘Every Breath You Take’ Verdict: Remember to lock all doors and windows

SceNE:

Ajimal

Delving into the explosive North East music scene every week to bring you your new favourite local band.

“I guess it would be nice if I could touch your body”- George Michael, ‘Faith’ Verdict: Disconcerting “Let me get my hands on your mammary glands, and let me get your head on the conjugal bed”- The Smiths, ‘Handsome Devil’ Verdict: Very clever, but very creepy “Woke up today, looked at your picture just to get me started”- Luther Vandross, ‘Never Too Much’ Verdict: Definitely too much

Creepy 1) Who are Ajimal?

Ajimal’s like a big collaborative project; Mick Ross (Frankie & The Heartstrings), Martin Longstaff (The Lake Poets), Simon Walker and Joe Frankland contribute a lot. The line-up’s completely flexible and shifting; sonically though, it’s obviously taken more my identity.

2) How do you all know each other?

I’ve got to know everyone from playing and going to gigs; you come across so many people that way.

3) What have you done with the band so far?

I’ve just written an EP (‘Children’) and released a single from that (‘Footnote to Love [Part One]’) in March; hopefully more will come from that.

4) Summarise the band in five words Ambitions yet thoughtful, minimal ghostly-folk.

5) Who are your musical heroes?

Tom Waits and Jeff Buckley; I don’t really see too much of them in my own music though. I really admire how Paul Simon tells stories through his records too.

“Jump in my car, I’d like to take you home”- David Hasselhoff, ‘Jump In My Car’ Verdict: Call the police

6) What was the first album you ever bought?

Limp Bizkit - Significant Other. Enough said.

7) What’s your favourite venue in Newcastle?

We did the single-launch for ‘Footnote to Love’ at the Lit & Phil; it’s a beautiful space, so atmospheric.

8) Who’s your favourite band on the Newcastle scene?

I absolutely love Trev Gibb of Deerhart; he’s a great guy, really fantastic musician, has the most beautiful voice, and his solo album is truly incredible.

9) What’s next for the band?

The EP will be released soon; it’ll be really nice giving it a proper release and build a bit of anticipation to it. I’m also touring with Little Comets this month, which will be great.

10) Where and when can we see you next in Newcastle?

I’ll be playing with Johnny Kearney and Cattle & Cane at The Sage on May 26th.

Chris Haywood

It was a damp and dark Monday afternoon when I saw him lying there. A fellow discount hunter asked me if I was OK when they saw the horror on my face. I wasn’t OK, I had just found Will Smith’s Willennium lying at the bottom of Poundland’s bargain bucket. I couldn’t just walk away and leave him there to rot alongside Celtic Romance and Ultimate Pub Ballads, so scurried across the shop floor to the checkouts. I knew I was in for something special when I had to prise it out of the checkout man’s hands - he just wouldn’t let it go and now I know why.

Willenium is just a big, juicy bar of audio caramel. When so many rappers feel the need to get all up in ya’ grill, Smith stands apart. He doesn’t shout at you to get his message across, he’s just a fun-loving criminal with some jazz-happy rhymes to lay down. Willard’s created fifteen tracks of oldskool rap bromance.

All of the tracks are brilliant, but a few in particular really get your booty bouncing. ‘Pump Me Up’ contains scratching that makes Grandmaster Flash look more like he’s frying an omelette than making a musical masterpiece. ‘Will 2K’ is perhaps one of the finest tunes on the album, taking a fair amount of inspiration from The Clash hit, ‘Rock the Casbah’. The conversion works extremely well with the added hip-hop beat, bringing the old hit into the new millennium.

If you think you’re as smooth as Willard when it comes to love, then you should give ‘Afro Angel’ a listen. Picture this: it’s raining outside, it’s just you and your lover sitting back on the couch with a crisp glass of chardonnay, giggling about something silly and playing with each others’ hair.

Think of the perfect song to accompany the moment and I guarantee it sounds like ‘Afro Angel’.

If you’re reading this, Poundland, as one of your biggest customers I am giving you personal permission to raise the price of this item, because Willenium is worth so much more than one hundred little brown pennies. On the other hand, this album needs to be available for the masses, so on second thoughts, maybe leave the price tag on.

In my opinion, this album has the power to change people’s perspectives on rap music. In fact, I’m going to go right out there and say that Will Smith has the power to change anyone’s perspective on anything; why he isn’t in politics just bewilders me.

I write this piece, not only in a vain attempt to convey how good this album is, but also as a tribute to the man that not only shares my surname, but also a very big place in my heart. Oh, and big Will Smith love for Poundland - forget HMV, I’m discount-bound all the way.

Rory Smith

30.musicfeatures

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/music c2.music@ncl.ac.uk

Django all the way

I

t’s been a great year for Edinburgh-born electro/ synth/indie rock/experimental band Django Django, with a successful debut album and a string of singles causing a stir in the music industry. With a bright future on the horizon, Music Editor Chris Scott talks to synthplayer Tommy Grace about their rise to fame, summer festivals and where on earth their album cover came from.

How did you guys start off ?

Where did you meet?

We all met at Edinburgh Art College. Myself, Vinnie and Dave were at Edinburgh, and Jimmy was at Glasgow but we know him through friends. We didn’t really start off doing music together for a little while, we were doing music individually, but we didn’t really come together in Edinburgh - we all ended up coming down to London for different reasons. It was only then, when Vinnie approached Davey to start producing some music he’d been making, which was kind of dancehall music, that things started to develop and it even-

tually became our single ‘Storm’.

What bands or genres influenced you guys early on to produce such unique-sounding music?

We have so many influences, and that comes from us all having quite varied record collections individually. But often it’s more producers who influence us more directly, more so than bands really. But people like Giorgio Moroder, who did amazing stuff himself as well as the work he did with people like Donna Summer, then going on to work with Blondie. It’s that synth-driven groove which is present in loads of our music, so I’d say that’s a particularly huge influence of mine.

You don’t really sound like many of the typical indie bands that have come out over the last few years.

Well, we don’t really listen to much from those kind of standard tried-and-tested ‘indie bands’ in all honesty; we listen to much older, less conventional bands from the sixties and we end up listening to loads of dancehall music, reggae and early hip hop. Those are more our influences and we tend to listen to bands like Talking Heads and Devo, as well as the exciting bands which came out following punk.

The album cover from your debut album is very interesting, where did the design for that come from?

It’s actually a collage that Dave made right at the beginning, when we first put the band on My-Space. He just did a quick collage and since then it’s always been in the back of our minds, even when we were putting together the first few songs. It kind of acted like a guiding light for us and the songs we wrote subsequently had that picture in mind.

It became a sort of pallette of colour that we would paint with. Then we started to make some sleeve designs for the album, but none of the images we came up with felt right, so we went with that.

It definitely stands out when you’re browsing through records.

It does, although I don’t think out record label were happy because it didn’t feature our

V

T

The Venue NUSU, 29 April

Tom Nicholson

What’s the maddest thing that’s happened to you on tour?

Well, we did a spot on a French TV show, and it was quite a mad show and all a bit weird, but we did it because our record label is French and they did an awesome job of promoting us, so we thought we’d give a bit back, and I remember playing ‘Default’ and the crowd all joining in and clapping in time, but I remember, that was quite a weird moment.

So the first album, released in January, was a huge success and drew a lot of attention.

Was it the reaction you were expecting?

In all honesty, it wasn’t; we thought we’d done something pretty good, but for us it was more the thought of people owning the record and playing the vinyl in their own homes that created such a feeling of accomplishment. Then people started saying how much they enjoyed it and it was only then that it sunk in that the music was popular and well received.

Preview:

band.

They were called Cloaks or Coast or something like that, and the saxophonist (yes, they had a saxophonist) looked like he’d just watched his dog lose a long and painful battle with a malignant illness backstage.

Fortunately, A*M*E was fantastic – a solo lady of pop, perky and armed with some flat-out brilliant songs, I’d put significant money on her being a star by this time next year.

With skittering beats and synths that call to mind similarly-initialised M.I.A., plus the nod to ‘Pon De Floor’ which is obligatory for any pop song worth its salt, ‘Ride Or Die’ was a particular highlight. A diminutive presence on stage, A*M*E nonetheless filled the cavernously empty space.

Even more amazingly, she has her own magazine, The A*M*E, which quotes Superintendent Chalmers from the Simpsons: “I’ve had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children...”

Sadly, she had to stop and Lonsdale Boys Club had to begin. If you’re unfamiliar, Lonsdale Boys Club are basically New Kids on the Block but with guitars and the occasional use of the word ‘motherfucker’.

Alternatively, if you squint your eyes and ears they look and sound like a taller version of One Night Only. The 14-year-olds who’d made cardboard signs loved them, but did LBC make up an agony uncle feature called Ask Kofi Annan? I very much doubt it.

So you’re playing Rough Beats festival and Parklife this summer, what can we expect?

Well, we’ll be playing tracks from the album and sticking mainly to that, but we’ve been around for quite a while really playing gigs and festivals, but it’s the first time this year we’re being noticed by a bigger crowd, so playing these bigger stages is always nice.

I’d say you guys do sound similar to the tracks I’ve heard from the likes of the Tom Tom Club.

Yeah, that’s a really good comparison and another band we listen to regularly.

It’s interesting - I was reading something the other day saying that as we grow older, our taste in music, fashion etc. regress back to the time period we were born in, so I think that’s what’s going on with us maybe.

Live: Lonsdale Boys Club & A*M*E enue was hardly banging on a miserable Sunday night, and the mood seemed to have filtered through to the first support

names on it!

Inertia Presents: Dimensions 2012 Launch o celebrate the impending Dimensions festival taking place in Croatia, showcasing some of the biggest names in house, techno and garage such as Four Tet, Mount Kimbie, Marcel Dettmann and Joy Orbison, Inertia are hosting the official launch party at World Headquarters.

On Wednesday 6 June, PANGAEA will headline - a co-founder of the esteemed Hessle Audio label and credited with some of the most innovative garage-driven productions of recent years. His DJ sets are high-octane affairs, spanning an eclectic range of contemporary bass music.

Supporting will be local hero Funk Ethics, performing an exciting live project with Lucid Directions, alongside Inertia residents Sully and Tim Shaw.

Advance tickets are £5, with every ticket holder entered into a draw to win two tickets to the Dimensions festival itself. The Inertia Presents night promises to highlight everything that’s exciting about UK bass music right now, but with the competition thrown in, it’s a night that’s simply too good to be missed.

Ben Travis

Win:

Beach Break Live weekend tickets!

Sort your summer festival plans out with two free tickets to Beach Break Live in South Wales from 14-18 June.

To be in with a chance of seeing The Maccabees, Friendly Fires, Nero, Dizzee Rascal, Dry The River, and tonnes more, send the answer to the following question to c2.music@ncl.ac.uk: Which three DJs/producers form last years’ headline act Magnetic Man?

We have our winners!

The winner of the pair of tickets to see Swedish House Mafia at Milton Keynes Bowl is: Tom Clark And the lucky winner of a pair of weekend tickets to Rough Beats festival in Yorkshire is: Colin Tuer Well done guys and enjoy the gigs!

The Courier

.31

Monday 7 May 2012

old, whilst I was still underage in a bar, and I “I’ve got ties with years ended up chatting to this comedian who told me consider doing that instead. He said that Newcastle; I’m to“it’smaybe kind of like a play, but you are your own writer, everything really”. And this comedian’s name was Craig Campbell. So he was the guy who practically one of producer, got me into comedy for sure, and ended up teachthem now! I’ve ing me probably everything I really know. it hard adapting your material to a even got a jean Was British audience? Did you have to change aspect of your comedy or did it remain jacket and any fairly the same? everything” Well, because I talk more about what happens in my own life it’s pretty relatable no matter where you go. The only time I could ever see there being a problem is when there might be a language barrier, but over here that isn’t an issue. And it isn’t like all my stories are about the Prime Minister of Canada and I’d be like “why don’t any of you people understand this?” So I end up talking about me and my gal, and telling stories about stupid stuff that happens on the road, just general what I like to call ‘buddy-buddy talk’. And hopefully it feels more like talking to a bunch of friends who might go “Yeah, you know what that happened to me too Tom!”

One of your sketches, the ‘meat van’ story always seems to get me, even though I’ve never bought meat from a van before!

You know what, that joke seems to have resonated with so many English people, I’m honoured I was the one chosen to tell it. I really love that joke and it is funny during my live shows, people really want to hear it again, even if they’ve heard it already a few times before. It’s like a number one hit song for me you know. I feel like that guy from Crazy Heart, that jokes been good to me. “I’m 57 years old, I’m broke but I have a good joke, it’s served me well.”[Referring to the character from the film].

Do you have any experience of Newcastle and its people?

I married a Geordie! Yeah man, I married the daughter of a Geordie. I’ve got ties with Newcastle; I’m practically one of them now! I’ve even got a jean jacket and everything.

What was your big break? Was it over in Canada or was it here in the UK?

Casting calls to Comedy Clubs

International funny man Tom Stade talks to Chris Scott about breaking the boundaries in Britain and experiencing hilarious hecklers So where did it begin for you? How did you Tom Stade on being a start out in comedy? comedian: “the money I ended up going to be an actor, then I went to a general ain’t great but the hours are casting call in Canada. I , ld awesome! It enables me to o did a really good reads r a e y 7 5 ’m I “ ing, but I found out I e v continue my high-school a h I needed an agent. See, t u b e k I’m bro that’s how hip I was. d e lifestyle’’. And as I spoke v r e s ’s it So I ended up calling , e k jo d o a go a few agents and saying to Tom whilst he lay in “hey, will you represent well” e m me without having ever bed at 2.45pm I thought to seen me before?” and most of myself, maybe I’ve chosen them just hung up on me.

So after that my buddy ended up taking me to a the wrong career path… comedy club, where there was a comedian playing there who I’d first seen when I was seventeen

Well, it’s quite hard to pin it down, as there’s been so many breaks for me in my career; over in Canada my big break came when we did a Comic Special for CBC. But over here I think my big break came on the Michael McIntyre show, who is really nice. I remember being with Mike when he was just an amateur and we got along really well, so when he became really famous and he asked me to come along on the show, the fact that he even remembered me was incredible. It just shows, it pays to be nice to people. As some guys early on had told him to “F*ck off ” and I can’t imagine them getting called back. But you’d do the same right? You meet people you like and get along with and then they become very special to you; then you meet people who are just dicks.

So then when Michael made it big it was nice to know I wasn’t one of the dicks.

So what’s the oddest thing that’s ever happened during a gig?

The oddest thing that ever happens to me during a gig is when people throw me. Even last night something funny happened; I was on stage and talking to some married people, and I love talking to the audience and especially love talking to married people. And I was talking to this one woman who said her and her husband had been together for seventeen years and that they had four kids, so I asked when did they get married? And she answered a year ago. And this didn’t make sense to me, especially when she said that none of the kids were her husband’s. Now I’d already been teasing her saying she doesn’t get off her back and stuff, so I asked whether she had maybe been divorced and she replied “No, my last husband died”. So I was thinking “oh right! Comedy gold right there!” and it’s hard because you have no idea what’s going to happen from there, like is this woman going to have a meltdown or something? But it was ok, she ended up being a really good sport and we all had a laugh.

What’s been your worst heckle on stage?

Well, again there are just so many and the thing with heckling is that it’s all about timing, and there is no specific one heckle that goes out. Most of time people heckling is a good thing because they’re really into the show and want to join in, which doesn’t normally come off as being a real heckle. But the other kind of heckle is just because they don’t f*cking like you and they just want throw you off your game.

I’ve never understood why people heckle comedians when they pay to see their show.

Well, it doesn’t usually happen at my gigs because then people come to see me specifically, it happens more at circuit gigs when there are several acts and people come to see comedy in general. That’s when the hecklers come out if they don’t like my material. And there’s been some brilliant ones in the past, most of which seem to revolve around f*cking my mother for some reason. My mom must have f*cked a lot of people by the sounds of it.

And for people that haven’t seen your show before, what can they expect?

Well, this tour is in preparation for my DVD, so I’m sorting out the order of the material and choosing the best jokes I want to try out. And I’m always up for banter on the night, so every night’s different and includes new little bits and pieces.

The best way to put it is: it’s like seeing The Eagles play their greatest hits you know. It’s all about preparation for me, I want to be able to hone my material, not just turn up on the day. So when I put the DVD together, it’s as good as it can be. So it can include ‘meat man’ and all the other jokes, but it also means I have time to tweak them if needed.

To me, a joke is never finished. I wish I could go back and redo some of my jokes, I’m like David Cameron that way.

Do you have any post-tour plans?

I’m halfway through writing another show whilst performing this current tour’s material. So my plan is to get the DVD finished and have the new show ready by August for the Edinburgh festival.

So that’s why I’m using these shows to prepare for the DVD, and hopefully the fans will understand that and really enjoy the show when I perform this material I’m doing now.

Tom will be touring the UK until October, and with tickets still available now is your chance to see the Canadian comedy man in action.

32.filmfeatures

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

5 Juvenile liasons

thecourieronline.co.uk/film c2.film@ncl.ac.uk

Top

Movie opening Scenes

5

Saving Private Ryan

Another classic from Steven Spielberg, this provides one of the most brutal and unflinching accounts of war ever captured. As they prepare to land on Omaha Beach on 6 June 1944, a group of American soldiers face the might of German firepower. What follows is the greatest and most uninhibited battle scene ever captured on film. Warning: this is not for the faint-hearted.

Enduring Love

4

A couple are quietly enjoying a champagne picnic in the middle of a vast field. What could possibly go wrong? Well, a runaway hot-air balloon. Bouncing out of control, with a baby on board, passers-by rush to help the child stuck in the basket before a gust of wind lifts the balloon, leaving the balloonist plummeting to his demise, unexpectedly provoking a startling intrusion of horror into a perfect summer’s day.

3

Jaws

Spielberg’s monster movie classic opens how it should: underwater, with only the ominous theme tune as an accompaniment.

Giggling teens, skinny dipping and shark attack ensue in a gruesome ordeal with a girl being thrashed from side to side before being pulled under the now blood-stained water. Our antagonist is still hidden from our view, but not our imagination. Already, we are terrified to go into the water.

City of God

2

Edited with frenzied unrestraint, this opening scene encapsulates life within Rio de Janeiro’s seemingly chaotic favelas. Following a runaway chicken escaping from the cooking pot, we are taken through the alleys and backyards along with a horde of teenage boys brandishing weaponry. Seconds later, the feathered escapee runs directly into the path of our as-yet unseen camera-holding hero, providing him with the perfect photo opportunity.

1

Scream

Arguably one of horror’s finest opening scenes, Wes Craven’s ‘Scream’ revived the flagging slasher genre by dispatching its leading actress within ten minutes. Drew Barrymore plays sassy Casey Becker, home alone preparing to watch a horror movie (what else?) when the phone rings.

The anonymous caller has one principal question: “do you like scary movies?” Ten witty and chilling minutes later, Casey is no more.

Sam Hopkins

With many of cinema’s biggest stars having acted in Hollywood since childhood, Chris Taylor discusses the history and destructive side-effects of the fabled ‘child actor’.

B

eing a child actor is an unusual affair. You’re thrust into the limelight before you even understand the birds and bees and gain more money before you’re 10 than a normal person would before they’re 60.

Some might argue that it’s possibly one of the most controversial jobs in Hollywood.

California, as a result of the concentration of the entertainment industry there, has some of the strictest protection of child actors anywhere in the world, with limits on the amount of time spent of set (which meant many studios often used identical twins, as with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen both playing Michelle Tanner in Full House). Child actors are usually the subject of many horror stories in Hollywood. Drew Barrymore, after starring as Ghertie in ET, grew up a lot faster than anyone expected, getting drunk at 11, hooked on cocaine before she hit her teens and entering rehab twice before she was 14. She’s now mellowed out and made a successful career as an actress but the speed and young age at which she went through addiction is one of the more prominent examples of child actors trying to deal with this newfound fame.

It is very much this pressure that has led them to do such a thing, at least in the 80s and 90s. They have to compete with pushy parents, suddenly being in the public spotlight while other kids are dreaming of being a football player or refusing to eat cabbage (because really who likes cabbage?) and pressures from Hollywood itself which, during the 80s and 90s, was rife with

scandal. River Phoenix became the main example of the pressures of being a child actor after dying of a speedball overdose at the age of 23.

The Two Coreys (Feldman and Haim) were driven apart by the pressures of being child actors. Both had starred together in a number of films, such as The Lost Boys, but the drug addiction that hit both of them led Feldman to declare shortly before Haim’s death that he wanted nothing more to do with him until he cleaned up.

Macaulay Culkin is perhaps the most iconic child actor, starring in slapstick Christmas hit Home Alone and Richie Rich. He became the highest-paid child actor of all time and was seen as the new Shirley Temple, but this pressure led to him estranging his parents and marrying a girl he had just met when he was 18, as well the drug addiction that hit later.

Being a child actor isn’t all doom and gloom though. Elijah Wood and Jodie Foster have both become successful actors in adulthood; Jenny Lewis, who starred in the most 80s film ever made The Wizard, went on to front successful indie rock band Rilo Kiley, and Shirley Temple went on to become a diplomat under the Nixon administration. These days, child actors have a lot less pressure put on them, mainly because every man and his dog has a chance to appear in bubblegum-pop Disney madefor-TV movies. Luckily, the age of child actor exploitation seems to be well and truly behind us and we’re now getting a new generation of child actors, such as Elle Fanning, who can easily outshine their adult co-stars.

(top left) Drew Barrymore in E.T , (top right) River Phoenix in Stand by Me, (bottom left) Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone (bottom right) Elijah Wood in Flipper.

75p films at Tyneside Cinema Tyneside Cinema 26-27 May

O

riginally built as Newcastle’s News Theatre in 1937, The Tyneside Cinema is steeped in history and proud of it, having the vintage feel of a theatre with a tearoom to match. It’s perfect for the true film aficionado or the causal critic alike.

Here is a cinematic environment where you can rest easy in the knowledge that no one will hurl the contents of their pick-and-mix at your head. Over the weekend of Saturday 26 and Sunday 27 May, they’re inviting you to come and celebrate their 75th anniversary. Festivities include a mammoth poster sale, a cake-making contest and a 75-hour programme of the best films from each of the decades that the cinema has operated.

The selection of films, as voted for by loyal customers, includes cult director David Lynch’s highly acclaimed Mulholland Drive.

This surrealist work revolves around Betty Elms (Naomi Watts) and her involvement in a dark conspiracy after she arrives in Hollywood. The plot is relatively intangible but this is part of its cryptic charm. Sounds too cerebral? Don’t worry, there’s a lengthy erotic scene that makes up for all the excess intellectual output. However, if you’re specifically looking for something sexually charged, see also Chasing Amy. For something more light-hearted, Rob Reiner’s The Princess Bride falls loosely into the romantic-comedic-action category.

Despite the fact that the female protagonist’s name is Buttercup, this film is supposedly quite good. Granted, it wasn’t a huge box office success at the time, but now it’s a cult classic and certainly one sure to impress the alternative kids. Furthermore, other phenomenal character names include Westley, Inigo and Fezzik. If this doesn’t convince you to go and see it, I don’t know what will.

Check out the North East’s moment of Hollywood glory in Get Carter, directed

by Mike Hodges. It stars Michael Caine as Jack Carter, a gangster born and bred in Newcastle, who returns to the North East to learn more about the suspicious circumstances of his brother’s untimely death. Supposedly taking on-screen crime to new gritty heights, Caine studied his own real criminal acquaintances to help him fully embrace the role. They also used local Geordie bystanders as extras to make the scenes feel uncompromisingly realistic and hostile. How flattering.

Meanwhile, if you haven’t yet seen Donnie Darko already, then shame on you.

Watch as Jake Gyllenhaal is plagued by visions of a giant sinster bunny rabbit called Frank. Also worthwhile is Jim Carrey’s turbulent love affair with a quirky, blue haired, olbas oil-addicted Kate Winslet in Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind.

Some stranger, more controversial offerings include Tod Browning’s Freaks, and not forgetting Stanley Kubrick’s Clockwork Orange.

With a mix of international cinema, cult classics (Battle Royale, Evil Dead 2), classical Hollywood and canonical gangster flicks (Goodfellas), the lineup is fittingly incredible and should appease film fans with all tastes. Opportunities to see these treasured motion pictures on the big screen are rare and it’s a worthy revision break (especially at a mere 75p for a ticket). For more info on the programming check out Tyneside website. Capiche? www.tynesidecinema.co.uk Lauren Stafford

The ‘Summer of Cinema’ The Summer of Cinema is a term that’s often thrown around in cinema trailer reels in torrents of hyperbole, bigging-up the latest medicore blockbusters. However, this summer, the sheer magnitude of cinematic leviathans hitting screens should leave even the most reticent cinema-goer salivating.

On 25 May, the eagerly-anticipated third part of Men in Black, starring of course Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones, will hit the screens, soon to be followed by Snow White and the Huntsman on 1 June, with the grumpy as ever Kristen Stewart as the fair Snow White in a somewhat kick-ass rendition of the classic Brothers Grimm tale.

Once the exam period is over on 8 June, make sure you don’t miss Ridley Scott’s Prometheus or the Disney/Pixar collaboration Brave (22 June), about a tough princess challenging old patriarchal customs. The highlights in July include The Amazing Spiderman (3 July), this time without Tobey Maguire, Oliver Stone’s Savages (6 July), Ice Age: Continental Drift (13 July) with our beloved characters Manny, Sid, Diego and Scrat, and The Dark Knight Rises on 20 July which promises to be equally epic as its prequel. August starts with another franchise that’s got rid of its main character, The Bourne Legacy on the 3rd. Other promising films include the Disney fantasy flick The Odd Life of Timothy Green (15 August) and of course The Expendables 2 on 17 August will see the return of the Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger to the silver screen. With superhero reboots, Pixar taking new directions and Ridley Scott’s long awaited return to sci-fi, this is a summer of cinema that you cannot miss. Bring on the summer!

Lisa Bernhardt

The Courier

reviewsfilm.33

Monday 7 May 2012

Film Editor: Chris Binding Online Film Editor: Hayley Hamilton

American Pie : The Reunion

of time and how life works out (with the lads in particular pondering how the kids today are so much wilder and hotter than they were) and trying to recapture some element of youth, with the first film providing a structure that is practically rehashed. This sometimes proves tedious, as the jokes and structure aren’t as fresh or at all original.

But who really cares? It’s still pretty funny, and it’s great to see this cast back together again. A real highlight is the pairing of Jim’s dad (Eugene Levy) and Stifler’s Mum (Jennifer Coolidge): an American Pie’s fan-fiction dream. And if you’re worrying that with the cast being in their thirties that the comedy will be less juvenile and inappropriate: you’d be so wrong. The humour is as crass and crude as ever, opening with two wank jokes and refusing to look back until the credits roll.

T

hese days, Hollywood is sequel mad, so it comes no surprise that a fourth (not counting the dismal straight to dvd sequels) instalment of the ‘American Pie’ series finally comes to fruition. The entire original cast from parts one and two are back, although it is obvious that some are just trying to make themselves still seem relevant in Hollywood (yes Tara Reid we’re looking at you).

In a nice reversal of the original film, Jim (Jason Biggs) has gone from desperately trying to have sex with anyone to desperately trying not to have sex. He’s married the girl of his dreams, and settled into married life. Sounds perfect right?

Wrong. He and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan) are now boring parents whose ‘sizzle’ has ‘fizzled’.

Chris Klein’s Oz has become a famous sports presenter and Thomas Ian Nicholas’ Kevin has become a house-husband and grown a beard.

Eddie Kaye Thomas’ Finch has travelled the world and looks like a fat Nicholas Cage. Rounding out the core five is a firm fan-favourite: Seann William Scott’s Stifler is still Stifler. Scott has perfected his comedy act in a wide foray of frat-comedies,

from the first ‘American Pie’ to ‘Road Trip’ and ‘Role Models’. No surprise then that he’s almost the entire reason to watch American Pie: Reunion, and he manages to muster the laughs even when the others can’t.

The plot itself is pretty simple: it’s been 13 years

since the gang graduated from East Great Falls High, and they return for a delayed class reunion, to discover that no matter how much things change (marriage, careers, kids, life), some things still remain the same. The majority of the film is split between ruminating about the passing

Damsels in Distress

Don’t Need You!

African Cats

VERDICT: Sure, it’s not at all original, and you won’t be shocked y anything you see: but it does what it says on the tin and, as an potentially penultimate entry into the American Pie cannon, it’s one of the best and hopefully the last. Definitely worth a watch.

Sam Hopkins

Being Elmo

Picture : Rex Pictures

T

A

VERDICT: While Stewart’s bedtime story approach might suit Disney’s demographic, it jars with some of the more violent scenes and isn’t nearly as informative as we’ve come to expect from BBC series like Frozen Planet. Don’t go in expecting David Attenborough and you’ll be fine.

VERDICT: A quirky, funny and charming film that gives Stillman a welcome return back into the film business, whilst introducing the Sambola dance craze. However, this will not be everyone’s cup of coffee.

f you’re at least a little socio-politically savvy, you will be aware that feminists are not a bunch of hairy-legged lesbian manhaters burning their bras (they never did, it’s merely a popular myth), but a diverse group articulating their protest against (gender) inequalities in many creative ways. One of the most famous, yet somehow forgotten, musical exports from the ‘third feminist wave’ during the early 90s was the Riot Grrl movement, originating in the US-American punk/independent music scene.

Apart from dealing with social issues like rape and domestic abuse in song lyrics, the riot grrrl’s also created networks of education and political activism to raise awareness for feminist politics.

The 2006 documentary Don’t Need You! traces the movement back to its beginnings, a frustration about the way female voices were repressed in the alternative, yet male-dominated indie scene. The film-makers interview some of the most significant characters of the movement, including Bikini Kill’s Kathleen Hanna, Sleater Kinney’s Corin Tucker and Allison Wolfe from Bratmobile, about their experiences of the time.

The whole documentary is fittingly shot in a congenial DIY-style using clips from concerts, photos and quotes from/about the movement alongside the interviews. A recommendable work and successful start to the LOUDER NOW! feminist film series at the Star and Shadow Cinema every last Thursday of the month, presented by the Newcastle University Gender Research Group.

VERDICT: If you’re a girl, this film will make you want to find a band and kick ass the political way. If you’re a boy - well, the same still applies. If you want to find out more about what it means to be a riot grrrl, this is the film to watch.

Sam Summers

Jacob Crompton Schreiber

Lisa Bernhardt

his Disney documentary about two mothers, Layla the lion and Sita the cheetah, trying to raise their cubs on the dangerous Kenyan savannah, contains exactly as many absurd displays of feline badassery as the premise would suggest. Elephants fight cheetahs, cheetahs fight lions, zebras fight lions, lions fight lions, and alpha lion Fang has a two minute roaring match with a crocodile.

Unfortunately, seeing as this is a Disney film, the footage has been edited into a loose story, and the narration strains to force human personalities onto the cats. Sita, for example, is portrayed as a ‘single mother’, and baddie lion Kala is ‘the most powerful force in the land, bent on conquest’.

Sometimes the narration flat-out lies, describing fights that aren’t happening, or building up tension where none exists.

Speaking of the narrator, in the UK we get Sir Patrick Stewart, while in America they’re living it up with Samuel L. Jackson. Stewart handles majestic well, but when it comes to odd lines like ‘never get fresh with an ostrich’ he falls a bit short.

All that aside, it really is a beautiful film. The shots range from gorgeous savannah landscapes swarming with wildebeest to an intimate close-up of a buffalo so detailed you can count the flies buzzing around his head. The array of wildlife on display is also staggering; the cubs play tag with a turtle, hide from hyenas, and watch a hilarious boxing match between a pair of aardvarks.

fter a break of thirteen years since his last film, director Whit Stillman offers up Damsels in Distress: an indie, comedic chick-flick that tries to alter the typical view on university campuses and cliques. Stillman has a cult following and his latest arthouse film does not disappoint, even after a 13-year hiatus.

Damsels in Distress sets itself on a stereotypical and leafy college campus in New England, aptly named Seven Oaks College. It follows a trio of girls, led by the brilliant Violet (Greta Gerwig), as well as Rose (Megalyn Echikunwoke) and Heather (Carrie MacLemore). They take new student Lily (Analeigh Tipton) under their wing as they try to improve the college by raising standards and hygiene levels, as well as trying to prevent suicides.

A bizarre diet of free doughnuts, coffee and tapdancing is used to help the depressed on campus.

Meanwhile, a new dance craze is created by Violet (whose life aim is to be remembered) called the Sambola, complete with instructions before the credits roll.

It is a rather strange film to say the least, but it also manages to be funny, charming and rather sweet. The Director of the Dublin Film Festival remarked that the film was “Jane Austen meets Animal House”, as the dumb frat boys are present, and combined with the vintage dress worn by the trio of girls this creates a truly eccentric campus atmosphere and film. However, the main characters can be too much at times, especially wannabe-Brit Rose.

I

W

e live in a world where documentaries tend to focus on the crumbling economy, the state of obesity or war. It’s very rare that we get something along the lines of Man on Wire: something that transcends the documentary rule book that says “they all have to be deadly serious”. Being Elmo is one of those documentaries. And who better to focus on than the fuzzy red monster that has been described as “Brad Pitt for 5-year-olds”. Elmo is pretty much the personification - or should that be Muppetification - of love, happiness, and sheer joy.

Being Elmo focuses on Kevin Clash, the guy who’s had his hand up Elmo (so eloquent) for almost 30 years now. It traces his humble beginnings in Baltimore to his flying up the ranks within Henson’s workshop. We see the first puppets he made by cutting up his dad’s coat, putting on puppet shows with his own puppets, his first trip to New York to see Kermit Love, the legendary Muppeteer, and eventually his introduction to Elmo, who was discarded by another Muppeteer who was unable to make it work.

Although we see a lot of family photos, archive footage and talking heads from his parents, the film doesn’t focus enough on Clash’s sacrifices in becoming Elmo, apart from a short piece about his daughter, or on what ultimately inspired Elmo’s personality but Clash is such a tender and loveable presence, it’s easy to connect with him.

Chris Taylor

VERDICT: After the success of The Muppets earlier in the year, Being Elmo is an adorable look into one of the world’s most loved characters. Full of joy, underdogs and dreams, it’s hard not to fall in love with the film.

34.

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

“Faith and science are not at war with each other. A worldview that includes both is more coherent than a world-view that only considers one or the other”

Faith in the age of science Local author Mark Silversides discusses religion, politics, and Richard Dawkins.

With the publication of his new book, Faith in the Age of Science Mark Atwill talks to Mark Silvers ides about his views on the ongoing debate on religion in the scientific world

I

f pressed, I’d say I was an atheist. Like many of us in modern Britain however, without definitive faith, I can look objectively at the apparent pros and cons of organised religion. The morality and the sense of community it provides has been the cornerstone of our society since the stone age, but ideologies, and when they collide, result in obvious, and sometimes violent clashes. Ignorance and militance from both sides of the table devolves the issue from one of debate to argument.

The inflammatory issues of atheism and secularism in society have been stoked up higher than ever this year, with milestone events like the much anticipated (albeit somewhat flat) debate between Richard Dawkin’s and then Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams.

The outward view of Britain has become a nation that frowns upon demonstrations of faith and of dusty, ageing clergy who demonstrate a continuous lack of understanding of the principles of their religion and are completely out of touch with their flock.

While there are individuals like Lord Carey, who decry secularism (and incidentally, homosexuality) who give Christianity in the UK a bad name, and fundamentalists in other major religions like Abu Hamza who do likewise for Islam, the fact is there are many modern theists who evolve with society.

Mark Silversides - a former anglican vicar is one such theist. A local resident of nearby Durham, and first-time author of the wellreceived novel Faith in the Age of Science, he has embraced the challenges laid down from the religious and scientific communities.

His debut outlines his own efforts to marry his belief in God with his understanding of science.

Can the two apparently opposing ideologies coexist? Are the important facets of faith far more important than portents of judgement and bronze age creation myths?

Was it your own faith, being a former vicar, that inspired you to write this book?

My faith is fairly tolerant. It was the intolerance of Richard Dawkins that prompted me to write the book. But as I researched it I realised that there are just as many strong arguments against atheism as there are against religion.

With the anniversary of Origin of Species this year, much publicised discussion has been blown up into an apparent war between atheism and religion.

Do you welcome this kind of debate?

I welcome the debate, but the view that there was always a war between science and religion is simply false. Right from the start of the debate there have been many religious people who have accepted Darwinism as a scientific theory. The science, however, was hijacked for political purposes, such as seeking to attack the power of the Victorian establishment. More sinister, it was also used to support the eugenics movement, which was in turn used to justify theories of ‘racial purity’ in parts of Europe, especially in Germany.

This debate has never really been a simple matter of atheism versus religion.

It is inescapable that most scientists are, or were, atheist, even those like Copernicus residing in a theocracy questioned the fundamentals of religion at great personal risk; it has been suggested even supposed agnostic scientists like Einstein were misquoted in their references to God. Does a deep understanding of science leave no room for faith?

Historically, most scientists were religious. In the book I have covered a range of people from the medieval monastery through to the twentieth century who demonstrate this fact. Professor Elaine Howard Ecklund, in a recent and extremely thorough survey of top scientists in the USA, found that almost half of them claim to be religious, and only a small minority are actively hostile to religion.

Yet the notion that nearly all scientists are dogmatic atheists continues to circulate like an urban myth. It may be that too much is made of small surveys of, for example, Fellows of the Royal Society. In my opinion a deep understanding of science does not exclude faith. It does exclude superstition - perhaps that’s what scientists are often against.”

Do you believe everything in the Bible?

The Courier

.35

Monday 7 May 2012

Faith in the Age able from Sacris of Science is availpurchased from ty Press, and can be A daring topic most book retailers. for that’s worth a lo a first-time author ok fr Catholic to avid om staunch atheist.

Do you feel that its completion (even its various rewrites and edits) before the golden age of science exempts it from scientific scrutiny? Or is personal critique necessary? Does that act in itself renege the basis of faith?

I believe that the Bible should be subjected to scientific scrutiny. True faith is held in the light of facts, otherwise it’s just wishful thinking. I would also say though that the claims made by atheists often do not stand up to scientific examination. For example, many of them state that there is almost certainly intelligent life elsewhere in the universe, even though there is not a scrap of evidence for this hypothesis. Belief in ET seems like a new religion.

Did it bother you that in such a climate of religious unrest, the much anticipated debate on the ultimate origin between Richard Dawkins and Rowan Williams was so lacklustre?

Yes. It’s as if no one wants to upset anyone else. I don’t go along with deliberate aggression, but robust disagreement is right and can be positive.

Maybe a certain war-weariness is creeping in.

How do you feel about David Cameron describing Britain as a Christian country when the 2009 British Attitudes Social Survey showed 50.7% of Britons declared themselves to have ‘no religion’; do you believe that politics should be nonreligious?

ence showingno id v e d le a h rs a ere would be st recently m “New Scienti eed religion - without it th n that humans civilisation.”

Mark Silversides- Sacritsy Press

believe in some kind of God or ‘life force’, and half of these claim allegiance to one of the major faiths. So it’s hard to see how politics can ever be non-religious.

We are a Christian nation in the sense that Christianity has the largest membership among religious bodies, and that many others still have some sympathy for it, perhaps as a source of basic moral values. It’s also worth remembering that a lot of our history and legal system is based on such ideas.

In a recent Guardian survey, 58% thought it was OK for the Prime Minister to refer to his Christian values in public. New Scientist recently marshalled evidence showing that humans need Young people are becoming more religion, without it there would be no civilisation. educated and aware of a scienceThe survey you mention also shows that half of dominated world, and with that we are those asked said they had a religion. Richard apparently moving further and further Dawkin’s own survey revealed the shallowness of belief away from religion. Do you agree among many who call some aspects of religion seem themselves Chrisoutdated and incompatible with tians, but did not under- the modern world? p e e d a disprove the n not pinio basic picture, “In my o g of science does Inevitably some aspects of religion clash which is that standin xclude faith” with modern outlooks. I do not think it is roughly twoe true however that young people are moving thirds of people further away from religion, although many do not respond to very traditional worship and so on.

As far as Christianity goes, most towns and cities have several large churches with a more modern style, and these attract large numbers of young people. Education seems to help this process, not hinder it, since students are strongly represented amongst them. ‘Alternative’ churches that meet in non-church buildings are also quite strong.

Richard Dawkins and Rowan Williams debate at Oxford University-Youtube

How would you summarise your book to prospective readers?

Faith and science are not at war with each other.

A world-view that includes both is more coherent than a world-view that only considers one or the other. Such a view gives us a good basis for considering the great issues of meaning, morality and suffering. If we can’t do that, we’re all sunk!

I

t has become increasingly difficult for the status quo to adhere to an atmosphere of total religious tolerance in our coldly cynical world.

People like Mark Silversides are the increasing majority, who can accommodate their faith within their understanding of science; a series of irrefutable facts.

The perennially propagated myth of the stubbornly blinkered theologist is outdated and has no hope of survival in a progressive society.

While by definition having a lack of religion, fundamental atheism inescapably conforms to one of the key components that define the term ‘religion’, at least according to some. If a religion is a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, then atheism is the religion of science. And why not?

Science be praised!

36.science&technologynews

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/science c2.science@ncl.ac.uk

Everybody caulk the dinosaur

5 things you need to know

The weekend Wallace and Gromit went prehistoric

Useless science discoveries

5

Liamfm Flickr

Vanilla Pats

In 2006, Japanese researchers decided it’d be a good idea to see if you could extract vanilla from cow dung. Turns out you can.

Through a one hour heating and pressurization process, vanillin is extracted, which is the main component of vanilla.

4

Edwinek Flickr

Defecation calculation Exactly what it sounds like. In 2003, a team of researchers thought it’d be interesting to calculate the pressures involved in the defecation of chin strap penguins. Turns out the penguins require “10 kPa to expel watery material and around 60 kPa to expel material... Similar to that of olive oil.”

Lovely.

Flickr

3 Blue Jelly

In 1992, researcher Ivette Bassa was working on some incredibly important chemistry: Colourful Colloids. Final product of all this research? Now we can all enjoy some bright blue Jell-O. Flickr

2

Spiceless chilli In 1999, the director of the Chile Pepper Institute thought he might try something new: Why not a completely spiceless Jalapeño pepper? After much cross-breeding he succeeded, so now we can all enjoy the great taste of Jalapeño peppers without actually tasting the taste.

1

Ian Hampton Flickr

Hamster jetlag Is your hamster’s jetlag keeping you up all night? Well don’t worry, because in 2007 a university in Buenos Aires discovered that feeding hamsters small quantities of viagra helps them deal with it more easily. We’re all saved.

Carl Simpson

C

hecking through my emails one day, I discovered a message from the Centre of Life addressing what to do with a large amount of genuine Aardman plasticine, the very same kind that is used in the Wallace & Gromit productions. Ideas were coming in thick and fast from the rest of the students of the Biology Society eager to get involved and unleash their inner creativity, which included life-size models of certain lecturers (that is Dr Gordon Beakes!) before finally deciding on making one giant dinosaur.

We were given a whole week to complete this project, with students able to drop in to the centre as and when they were free, and on the first day it was definitely full steam ahead. An eager group of students ready to get stuck in arrived bright and early at 10am to the Make It Zone, armed with vast amounts of polystyrene, cardboard and green tape, which meant soon enough we were all getting the foundations well and truly built to resemble the structure of a Stegosaurus Armatus. This means ‘roof lizard’ and they lived during the Late Jurassic period, so a little bit of learning was involved; who says you can escape the science wherever you go! By the end, it was roughly around the size of two Robinson Library desks tall and long, big enough to make a statement indeed.

Next, adding plasticine onto the dinosaur was only just the beginning of the fun part.

We were given some tips of the trade and soon enough a production line was taking place, with hairdryers in use to soften the plasticine, rolling pins at the ready to flatten it out and many hands to cover our very own recreation of this extinct species. No doubt about it, it was impossible to leave the structure alone once we started it, and we were left with traces of green plasticine just about everywhere from nails to knees, which was truly a sign we had put in some

sheer grafting that we can be proud of!

Our very own finished dinosaur received great feedback and reactions from the public; young children and their parents certainly took a shine to it, which made it all seem worthwhile. It was great to take a break from revision and Helena Pearse, a second year Biology student who helped contribute, says “plasticine for adults is definitely underrated!”

Helen Man

Teaching your granny how to suck eggs

Research to keep older drivers safer and on the road for longer

W

e all know what happens when you hit 75. You buy a flat cap and drive round every Sunday morning as slow as possible. Not for much longer, as research from Newcastle University looks at new technology in keeping older drivers on the road for longer, and in a safer manner.

This technology is being researched using an innovative electric car called ‘DriveLAB’ which monitors the driver’s concentration, stress levels and driving habits whilst sat behind the steering wheel. The data collected is then used to develop a new system including navigation tools, night vision systems and intelligent speed adaptations.

The science shows that as we get older our bodies become more worn out and things begin to function a lot less efficiently. In the context of driving, reactions become slower, hazard perceptions change, and we are more likely to forget directions. This in all makes for a very dangerous situation when you’re hurtling at 70mph down a three-lane motorway on a Friday afternoon and can be the cause of fatal accidents.

Boy racers beware though, because according to the data, older people are more likely to speed. Dr Amy Guo says ‘most of us would expect that older drivers always go slower than everyone else but surprisingly, we found that in 30mph zones they struggled to keep at a constant speed and so were more likely to break the speed limit and be at risk of getting fined’. This information led to research into speed control

DRIVElab

...keeping people driving safely for longer, which in turn boosts independence and keeps us socially

systems which target keeping the vehicle at a constant speed, much like cruise control.

A SatNav system with pictures instead of just maps is also being developed to make navigation easier and safer as we get older.

The main aim of the research is to ‘look at ways of keeping people driving safely for longer, which in turn boosts independence and keeps us socially connected’. This is also helping to reduce the stigma of the older

generation not being in touch with technology, making accessible products with a real purpose.

So, with the problems of driving when elderly sorted, the next problem is to redevelop the British road network, factoring in toilet and tea breaks every two miles.

James Simspon

The Courier

featuresscience&technology.37

Monday 7 May 2012

Science Editor: Mark Atwill Science Online Editor: Adam Bristow-Smith

Technology

Cispa Gold

Weird Science

An invasion of civil liberty?

H

ave you got anything to hide? You probably don’t, but does that give government security forces the right to freely investigate your personal information stored on the internet? In the US, a bill was passed in the Senate that permits Cispa to go public, but is this all just a little too Orwellian?

Cispa refers to the Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act, which aims to make the sharing of information between internet companies and the federal government simpler, with the idea of preventing attacks from cybercriminals and terrorists. The worry is that the bill offers the government unprecedented access to online communications, and threatens public privacy.

The Centre for Democracy and Technology said it was “disappointed that Cispa passed the House

Picture this

in such flawed form and under such a flawed process.”

“We are disappointed that House leadership chose to block amendments on two core issues we had long identified – the flow of information from the private sector directly to NSA and the use of that information for national security purposes unrelated to cybersecurity.”

Michelle Richardson, legislative counsel for ACLU –American Civil Liberties Union- said, “Cispa goes too far for little reason. Cybersecurity does not have to mean abdication of Americans’ online privacy. As we’ve seen repeatedly, once the government gets expansive national security authorities, there’s no going back.”

There still exists the probability of a presidential veto on the bill, but the question must still be how

Clash of the Titans

C

1984 - Youtube it got so far. An article in the Guardian last week interestingly showed just how much information was retained by certain online communications sites, and just how difficult it was to get them to reveal that information. With government backing and support, is this too much of an invasion of our personal space?

Or are we being paranoid; if we’ve got nothing to hide, is this a good idea? No we’re not. And no it isn’t. Western democracy only survives with civil liberties in place, and without liberty, man is a syncope.

An evolution revolution

Mark Atwill

James Ricketts A 500 million year old bacterial protein has been isolated, and inserted into E. Coli to create an alternative model of evolution. Apparently things are already happening differently, like accidentally creating a super-plague that destroys humanity

ould the conditions on distant worlds give us clues to the origin of life on Earth? The methane clouds on Titan, a moon of Saturn where the temperature never exceeds -180 °C, could provide the basis for life. In a simulation of the atmospheric conditions, chemical reactions occurred to form some of the early precursors of life.

So is there life on Titan? The 1997 Cassini space mission has been orbiting the moon since 2004, and has yet failed to report any sign of civilization. This has not deterred NASA scientists, who believe the conditions on Titan may be representative of those found on Earth about 3.5 billion years ago.

The thing that makes Earth different is that we are closer to the sun, that which provides the vital spark for life to form.

The Titanian atmosphere is thick enough to filter out UV light from the sun, which damages DNA on Earth. The moon also enjoys very mild weather, with Cassini reporting that no storms have happened there during its tenure. The lack of UV energy and lightning mean that there is an inherent energy gap, which means that even if precursors of life, amino acids, could form on Titan, they would never be relinquished by oxygen-containing compounds on the surface.

Hope still remains for life however. Much of Titan’s surface is covered by vast tracks of windblown hydrocarbon. Californian chemist Jack Beauchamp has conducted several experiments using wind as a source of energy that may permit the liberation of amino acids from surface compounds. Sure enough, at temperatures well below 0°C, the simulated strong winds of Titan were sufficient to kick-start a reaction that produced the amino acid glycine.

He said of the experiment: “This is a totally new process for making molecules of astrobiological importance.” The results occurred only days before their presentation at an international conference, and are as such preliminary. However, Beauchamp believes the process could easily produce other amino acids. If that were true, he may have found a way for life to exist on Titan.

Skeptics argue that proceeding reactions to result in life would be hindered by the frigid weather of Titan. However, this process has paved the way for the potential of life on other bodies within the Solar System. Perhaps the most intriguing is the suggestion that life could still exist on Mars, having adapted to conditions of austerity following their evolution.

The atmosphere of Titan is only around 1 billion years old, a fraction of the age of the Earth’s. In millennia, could one imagine the formation of a complex system of windpowered Titanian life? Only time will tell, but this is the most intriguing astrobiological discovery in a long time.

Mark Atwill

To the all scientists’ horror they realised that Dr Muckenfuss had indeed dropped a chicken pasty crumb into the petri-dish as the creature emerged. From then on they called the new born abomination “GREGG” Youtube-BBC

38

Puzzles

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

thecourieronline.co.uk/puzzles c2.puzzles@ncl.ac.uk Puzzles Editor: Laura Armitage

You can find the answer s to this week’s pu thecou zzles at rieronli ne. co.uk/p uzzles

Sudoku Easy

Hard

Medium

Crossword

Word Link Find the missing word that connects these three words together.

Bound

Raw

Cow

Balancing

Class

Double

Desk

Garden

Slicker

Educated

Second

Work

Number Puzzle Mind over matter Break the code to discover the missing letter.

Hint: A-Z = 1-26

Hub words How many words can you make from the letters in the wheel? Each word must contain the hub letter G. Can you find a 9-letter word and at least 25 other words of four letters or more avoiding proper nouns?

Across

Down

1. Ploy (6) 4. Requiring secret knowledge (6) 9. Disapproves (7) 10. Angry (5) 11. Land measure (4) 12. Perplexing (8) 14. Disney cartoon character (5) 16. Mournful poem (5) 20. Scorn (8) 21. Fencing sword (4) 24. Female relative (5) 25. Pills (7) 26. Unmarried (6) 27. Precious stones (6)

1. Worldwide (6) 2. US military officer (5) 3. Unit of length (4) 5. Precipitation (8) 6. Astounding (7) 7. Come out into view (6) 8. Ordinary (5) 13. Celestial (8) 15. Lamp (7) 17. Parts of a play (6) 18. Catches sight of (5) 19. Creatures (6) 22. Fragment (5) 23. Woodwind instrument (4)

39

Sport The Courier

Monday 7 May 2012

thecourieronline.co.uk/sport

Sport Editors: Colin Henrys, Harry Slavin and Rory Brigstock-Barron Online Sport Editors: Grace Harvey and Charlie Scott courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk

“Bleeding blue and red” Sports Editor Rory Brigstock-Barron caught up with Performance Sports Manager Fraser Kennedy to talk this years success, last years failures and next years targets

Netball close to Prem after win in Edinburgh NETBALL Edinburgh 1sts Newcastle 1sts

32 44

By Fiona Moss in EDINBURGH

“I know Northumbria are still reeling from it, they feel they should be winning every year, although they’ll always make up some excuse for not winning.”

W

ith nine trophy finals, six winners medals and an unprecedented fifth Stan Calvert victory in a row over arch rivals Northumbria, Team Newcastle have had an excellent season, and Performance Sport Manager Fraser Kennedy was keen to praise efforts from all quarters: “I think the clubs have reacted magnificently, the committees have been excellent and I’d like to thank them all for their work.”

This season has seen Newcastle reassert themselves as a top 12 force in the overall BUCS standings after a disappointing 15th place finish last year. At the time of writing the team sit in 10th place with a few key events remaining this season, but, according to Kennedy, avoiding complacency is key: “It’s fantastic how well we’ve done this year, but our aims and objectives for next year are just as significant as they had been for this year.”

Standards seem to have been the big change this year in University sport, which is testament to the new approach taken at the very beginning of the campaign.

“I wasn’t particularly happy or impressed with how last season went on the field and off the field in terms of quite a lot of clubs not raising the bar.

We relied on two or three clubs to really

Fraser Kennedy and AU Officer Alice Holloway proudly clutching the Stan Calvert trophy in March. Photography: Moises Bedrossian

pull us out of the mire.

“We’re still punching above our weight don’t get me wrong, it’s not doom and gloom, but being the person that I am I saw that as a bit of a failure” It’s this kind of attitude that has transformed the outlook of performance sport this year and could lead one to see last years failings as a blessing in disguise, forcing a focus on administration and increased professionalism.

“We’ve had one or two good athletes coming in but its mainly due to how they’ve turned it round and how they’ve looked to become more professional.”

The chief of performance sport was also keen to praise the coaching staff at the University, who go above and beyond the line of duty for the cause.

“All the coaches that work for me do so many more hours than they’re meant to.

Their commitment is second to none.

“If you were to work out how many hours they do some of them wouldn’t even get minimum wage.”

This element is a key factor in the Universities ability to compete with other institutions that invest much more money in to sport, and those that offer sports based degrees. When asked whether he thought this was something Newcastle should consider, Kennedy said: “We don’t really need to if you look at how we’ve done. I think what we’ve done over the last five years shows what you can do without having that sports studies element.”

One only has to draw parallels with

the University’s arch rivals to see that investment isn’t everything when it comes to sporting achievement.

“If you look at Northumbria in two areas they’ve still got more coaches than us, then you look at their recruitment scholarships. It’s £10,000 for three years, ours is £1,250, we’re miles away from that yet.

“There’s only ourselves, Nottingham and Oxford potentially, maybe one more, that don’t have Sports Science courses.

“Northumbria have got 1,000 undergraduate Sports Science, Sport Coaching students etc.”

These factors put Newcastle’s remarkable fifth Stan Calvert victory in a row in to perspective, and Kennedy has only one explanation for the continued success in the competition.

“We have a winning mentality for Stan Calvert at the moment, but deep down I had reservations and concerns.

“We looked on paper like we wouldn’t have won this year, so in consideration of results in league campaigns prior to the competition, I feared the worst.

“They just reacted, not just on the day but those matches that happened before Sunday. We’ve instilled this winning mentality for the Stan Calvert that we don’t want to surrender it or loose it.

“Some of the results that we pulled off were marvellous. They bleed blue and red for the cause.”

The team are targeting a sixth win in a row next year and the man at the helm fancies their chances.

“Next year is going to be as hard as ever, but six is my lucky number. I’ll be doing whatever I can to ensure we win number six.

“I know Northumbria are still reeling from it, they feel they should be winning every year, although they’ll always make up some excuse for not winning.”

Last Wednesday, the day of the interview, both Women’s Lacrosse and Netball Firsts gained huge play-off wins, the former moving up in to the Premiership and the latter giving themselves a great chance of doing the same with an away victory in Edinburgh, the first game of a three team round-robin. An extraordinary number of cup points have pulled the team through this year but next year Newcastle will be targeting league points as their bread and butter, and Premiership teams gain a huge amount of BUCS points for their institutions.

“We lost five Premiership teams last year, so you look at our team points this year, it’s the poorest it’s ever been I think.

“You look at Durham, you look at Exeter, they’ve got something like 16 Premiership teams. We have to start focussing and pushing for the Premiership because that’s the key” Kennedy is now looking toward this weeks rowing Regatta as well as up coming equestrian, canoe polo and the remainder of the cricket season to secure the vital points needed to finish as high as possible and complete a memorable year for Team Newcastle.

In the first of two play-offs, the Firsts Netball Team travelled north of the boarder to come out on top against a tough Edinburgh side.

Constructed in a round-robin fashion, the third team, Birmingham, faced Edinburgh last week in the first round of play-offs to prove the stronger team. Therefore Newcastle knew they needed a win under their belts in order to gain a fighting chance of retaining their challenge for a position in the Premiership.

Despite a late 7pm start the girls’ enthusiasm was not disheartened and they warmed up and prepared for the game with their usual energy and determination.

However, despite their efforts, the Firsts could not find their feet in the first quarter. Immediately losing their own first centre pass came as a shock to a usually composed side and despite their continued battle to keep up to speed with an Edinburgh side that was proving stronger than anticipated, NUNC went into the first break trailing by two goals.

Moving into the second quarter the girls steadied the pace of play, and controlled their movement of play much better. This led to the prompt conversion of four goals, turning the lead to their favour. However, although they retained this lead, the team’s performance continued to look a little unsettled.

Entering the second half, the team made changes to their line-up in an attempt to shake up movement around court and displace Edinburgh’s defensive tactics. Although times of trepidation and static play continued to remain the strategy still took effect and NUNC finished the third quarter up by 5.

In the final quarter, Newcastle kept their heads and pushed on. Struggled with dubious umpiring calls at times, they continued to fight, not allowing anything to deter them from their ultimate goal. A succession of outstanding shots from Hannah Swainson increased the Firsts lead further and a final burst of energy handed the girls a 44-32 win.

Despite a shaky game from the Firsts in a match that they expected to dominate, the girls proved that even when not at their absolute best they can still overpower their opponents.

Next week will be the decider on whether they gain what they have aimed for all season: a place back in the premiership. Playing at home is a great advantage against a solid Birmingham side, who Newcastle has already lost once to this season. Show you support next Wednesday at 6pm in the Sports Hall.

40.sportolympics

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

London calling: An exclusive guide to James Docherty gives a run through of the less WEIGHTLIFTING prevalent sports that will hit the capital this summer So, there are now less than 12 weeks until the Olympic Games start in London. Your tickets have arrived and you missed out on the 100 metres final, the beach volleyball, and possibly everything else you were actually wanting to see.

Instead you’ve got something you would never have thought of watching were it not for the occasion. For those of you wanting to embrace the slightly less well-known sports, here’s a short primer for a few of the less popular events that will be hitting the capital in the summer.

FENCING Three Weapons (Epee, Foil and Sabre) fought between two people for three periods of three minutes with the first to 15 winning.

Foil and Epee score with the point by a thrusting hit, Sabre scores with the blade through a slashing motion. Points are only valid if on-target: In Foil this means on the Torso, Sabre above the waist and Epee anywhere on the body.

Team GB Chances: Richard Kruse (Men’s Foil) and Natalia Sheppard

(Women’s Foil) both have an outside chance of a medal, either individually or in teams.

Who to watch: Italy is a powerhouse of Fencing, with Andrea Cassara (Men’s Foil) and Valentina Vezzali (Women’s Foil) dominant.

What to say: “What a fantastically timed stop-hit by Kruse!”

What not to say: “This is nothing like Game of Thrones!”

Athletes are split into weight classes and aim to lift the most weight combined across the two lifts: the snatch (weight taken above the head in one movement) and clean and jerk (weight taken to the chest, then above the head), with arms extended and bar and body in a straight line.

Team GB Chances: Zoe Smith met the Olympic A Standard in the 58kg and

is a good prospect for a medal.

Who to watch: China, Russia and Kazakhstan all have strong competitors in every class, with Iran also fielding excellent lifters in Kianoush Rostami (Men’s 85kg) and Behdad Salimi (Men’s 105kg).

What to say: “Superb execution of the final press.”

What not to say: “Muscley Women?

Ugh!”

Britain’s Zoe Smith: ‘A good prospect for a medal’ Photography: Getty Images

MODERN PENTATHLON

Great Britain’s Richard Kruse in action. Kruse has an outside chance of a medal in London this summer Photography: Getty Images

Back of the net

Video of the week

Replicating the challenges of a cavalry soldier, competitors must swim, show jump, fence, shoot and run their way to victory. The first three events give the athletes their start time in the final run/ shoot and the first competitor to cross the line at the end of this 3km run wins.

Team GB Chances: Strong in the women’s event, with whoever is picked capable of winning a medal.

Spot the ball

Testing times

1.) How many caps did Stuart Pearce’s 23-man England squad against Holland have between them?

2.) Which Dutch striker has scored the most league goals in Europe this season?

3.) Who is the oldest player to ever win the Snooker World Championship?

4.) How tall was the World’s tallest female basketball player, Malgorzata ‘Margo’ Dydek?

5.) How many of Real Madrid’s La Liga winning squad start their careers at the Santiago Bernabeu

Fiorentina manager punches his own player

A

B

C

Who to watch: Lena Schoneborn of Germany will be hoping to defend her Women’s Title, with Russia strong in the men’s event and spoilt for choice in the run up to the games.

What to say: “There hasn’t been a final run this tense since the Montreal Olympics in ‘76.”

What not to say: “Does the horse get a medal too?”

D

E

F

1 2 3

http://video.thescore.com/watch/fiorentina-manager-

Tweet of the week

-Tavarres King - @TKUnoDos “BIG John Jenkins sleep in the Players lounge.. Y’all ever seem anything like this!? http://pic.twitter.com/4MNYsjKZ ” (3 May) The Georgia WR leaves John Jenkins with some explaining to do. Make sure you check out the photo!

1.) J443; 2.) Bas Dost (Heerenveen, 31); 3.) Ray Reardon (45 in 1978); 4.) 7’2” 5.) 5 (Casillas, Adan, Arbeloa, Granero and Callejon)

Adem Ljajic nearly signed for Manchester United. The Red Devils pulled out however, leaving the Serb to join Fiorentina and take a beating from his own manager.

This week in sport University Sport - 11 May 2008: Fred Gill, Mason Durant, Andrew Corrigan, Dan Cupit, Murray Wilkojc, Charles D’Oncieu, Nathan O’Reilly and Piers Pye Watson took on Durham in the annual Tyne Boat Race.

Intra Mural - 10 May 1987: Dentals I won the ‘Girlies Intra Mural Hockey Tournament’ at Claremont Sports Hall.

World - 12 May 1979: Chris Evert’s 125 match unbeaten run on clay is ended.

4 5 6 Send the correct coordinates of the ball to courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk to enter a draw to win a £5 Mens Bar voucher.

No winners last week (IM Football). The ball was in C6.

The Courier

olympicssport.41

Monday 7 May 2012

the Olympics WADA bad decision TAEKWONDO

Four weight classes for men and women, with points awarded for kicks or punches to the body (one point), spinning kicks to the body (two points) or to the head (four points) across three frenetic two-minute rounds.

Team GB Chances: Aaron Cook won the 80kg gold at the Test Event, but with the European Championships starting this week, prospects will be more ap-

By Lucy Williams parent soon.

Who to watch: As a martial art that originated in Korea, South Korea will field a strong squad full of medal chances.

What to say: “That loss means they’ll enter the repechage to fight for the Bronze.”

What not to say: “Come on, I’ll take the lot of you!”

TRACK CYCLING Ten events: Team Sprint, Individual Sprint, Keirin, Team Pursuit and Omnium for both men and women. The Keirin originated in Japan and has cyclists starting behind a powered bike that accelerates from 25km/h to 50km/h over 1500 metres, leaving the competitors to fight it out over the last 500 in a straight chase to the line.

Team GB Chances: With World Champion Sir Chris Hoy in the saddle, the only question is what colour medal it will be.

Who to watch: All of the British Team will be hoping to eclipse their seven gold medals from Beijing and will be strong candidates for podium places in all 10 events.

What to say (during the points race in the Omnium): “The best tactic now

WRESTLING Two styles: Greco-Roman (only using arms and upper body) and Freestyle (all body parts) in order to take an opponent off their feet and ideally pin their shoulders to the mat.

Points are awarded for takedowns and escaping from locks. Matches are three periods of two minutes, ending in a successful pin or if a wrestler wins the first two periods.

Team GB Chances: Some former

is to lap the field and maximise the possible points.”

What not to say (during the Sprint): “Why are they dawdling? Get on with it!”

Photography: Getty Images

Eastern European athletes now wrestling for Great Britain make it more than just turning up, but likelihood of a medal is slim.

Who to watch: Eastern Europe dominates both styles, with Ukraine, Belarus and Russia all fielding strong squads.

What to say: “Excellent bridge there preventing the pin.”

What not to say: “Where’s the Steel Cage?”

Picture the scene: the sun is beating down on the capital on a hot summer’s day as Dwain Chambers crosses the 100m finish line basked in glory and pride. Yet, can this really be the case?

If Chambers does manage to qualify for the London Olympics his presence, and any success there, will be tarnished by his disreputable past.

It would make for uncomfortable and uneasy viewing rather being able to watch on as a proud British citizen.

The British Olympic Association (BOA) had been imposing life bans on athletes found guilty of using performance enhancing drugs, but this has been overruled by the Court of Arbitration for Sport (CAS), since the life ban does not comply with the World AntiDoping Agency (WADA).

CAS has ruled that the BOA are imposing an additional sanction on top of the WADA penalties already imposed on athletes. WADA have stated that doping penalties must be uniform around the world, and I agree wholeheartedly with this argument, but rather that the practice of doping should universally mean the end of that athlete’s Olympic career.

The official publication of this ruling will now make it possible for sprinter Dwain Chambers, cyclist David Millar and shot-putter Carl Myerscough to become Olympic athletes once again.

It even paves the way for the slim possibility of Rio Ferdinand, who missed a drugs test in 2003, to be included in the GB football squad. Consequently, there is potential for at least four disgraced athletes to pull on the red, white and blue of Great Britain.

The majority of the GB team aiming to qualify for the Olympics must feel so dispirited; their Olympic place that they have been working tirelessly for could be taken by a cheat. The London Olympics is supposed to be a chance to showcase to the world our magnificent country; it is not a suitable event to exhibit our few dishonourable athletes in front of the world’s eyes.

The removal of the life ban has stirred fierce debate; many people see the recent case as an embarrassment to Great Britain as the Olympics loom. As a national Olympic committee though, I can only applaud the BOA for trying to uphold the integrity and respectability of their athletes, and thus of their nation.

People have also taken to bemoaning the advocates of the life ban as being overly harsh and sanctimonious; even former Olympic triple jumper Johnathan Edwards has come out and said that the cheats deserve a second chance, as a life ban is a death knell to a prosperous athlete’s career.

However, this is not the case. Dwain

Down but not out: Dwain Chambers can now compete for a place at the 2012 Olympics Photography: Getty Images

Chambers and David Millar have been able to earn a living through European and World Championships. I do not think it is too unforgiving to demand that they do not represent our nation at the platform of world sport.

Yet, instead, athletes are now only to be given a two year ban, which does not even take them out of an Olympic cycle. This theoretically means an athlete can spend those two years training and come back fighting at a major event such as the Olympics and win a gold medal.

For example, American runner LaShawn Merritt, the reigning 400m Olympic champion, was banned in 2010 for a mere 21 months for taking steroids and so he is legitimate to compete to retain his crown in London this summer.

What lesson is this teaching? If people deem the life ban to be too severe a sentence, I must argue in retaliation that the current punishment is just sim-

ply not effective. It is setting a precedent for future drug use, as the penalty is not tough enough to ward off athletes taking the risk to enhance their performance.

We only need to look at the Tour De France; once a competition revered worldwide and seen as the most prestigious of cycle races, but now looked upon with suspicion by many, as year after year it has been plagued with doping scandals and the subsequent stripping of titles, such as that of Alberto Contador in 2010.

Not only is the recent CAS ruling removing the only last true deterrent of doping and drug abuse in sport, it is helping to develop the image of sport as corrupt and rotten. Britain had stood out on its own as a real champion of true sportsmanship and conduct, yet with this contentious development, Britain has been absorbed into the lenient universal norm of letting cheats off far too lightly.

“There should be a belief that people are able to change and this decision supports that point of view” FREDDIE CALDWELL COMMENT

Greco-Roman wrestling at the Test Event earlier this year Photography: Getty Images

The issue of performance enhancing drugs in sport is very serious and needs to be dealt with strongly.

However, the fact that a court has overturned the British Olympic Association’s policy of lifetime bans

should be seen as a positive.

The decision brings Britain in line with the World Anti-Doping Agency which makes the system fairer and more transparent for everyone.

Under the previous state of affairs, British athletes faced much tougher sanctions if they were caught cheating than those from other countries.

It is right that the BOA takes a tough stance on this issue, however, there seems to be little point in having an international body presiding over doping if not everyone has to

obey the rules which it sets.

The BOA now wants the global rule to be a ban of four years, which seems more proportionate to the crime than a lifetime ban.

Whilst the prospect of being banned from competition for life may deter some athletes from cheating in the first place, it also ruins the chances of redemption for anyone that has already strayed. There should be a belief that people are able to change and this decision supports that point of view.

42.featuresport

It’s all kicking off: what else to expect from the spectacular sports summer If the prospect of the Olympics is not enough to get you through revision stress, never fear - here is The Courier’s pick of the best of the rest this year:

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

EURO 2012 Like any international football tournament, the Euros are a time when office efficiency drops spectacularly, Baddiel and Skinner make yet another re-entry into the UK Top 40, and St George’s cross flags get stuck, hung or lodged in every corner of our proud little country.

Whilst the appointment of Roy Hodgson as manager has hardly been met with widespread enthusiasm, there still exists an irrational tinge of hope for England in the coming tournament.

Three Lions aside, the tournament itself, from a neutral point of view, promises to be an absolute belter!

First we have the favourites - the current European and World Champions Spain. You would be wise not to bet against the outstanding pass-masters, Spain will be looking to defend their European Crown Photography: Getty Images

WIMBLEDON Wimbledon is perhaps the most distinctive event of the British summer; strawberries and cream, Robinson’s Fruit and Barley and, of course, the most exciting tennis of the season.

In the men’s event this year, most of the focus will be on Novak Djokovic and Rafael Nadal as the top two have continued to set the world alight in 2012. Nadal’s dominant victory over the world number one in Monaco last month was his first in his last eight attempts, and should the Spaniard retain his Roland Garros crown, he will fancy his chances to put pressure on Djoko-

vic at SW19. This will be no mean feat though, as Djokovic, who retained the first of the slams he won last year when he defended his Australian Open crown in January, will be looking to reign once more at Wimbledon to keep his place as the world number one. It would of course be foolish to write off six time champ Roger Federer, who looked resurgent towards the end of last season and Andy Murray certainly has a chance, particularly with home crowd advantage.

In the women’s competition, any of the current top six could challenge for the title with no clear favourite. Last years champion Petra Kvitova will face a tough task if she is to defend her title, with 2004 champion and last years runner up, Maria Sharapova, as well as world number one Victoria Azarenka both on great form so far this season.

Other dangerous contenders include former world number one Caroline Wozniaki, the ever-dangerous Aussie Sam Stosur, and four time Champion Serena Williams, who tends to save her best for Wimbledon.

Rory Brigstock-Barron

TOUR DE FRANCE The 2012 Tour de France is set to be one of the most exciting ever, particularly for fans in the UK, because there are two British cyclists with great chances of winning the various classifications.

Mark Cavendish was very successful in last year’s race winning five stages and taking the points classification in the process. He will be looking to do the same this year and consequently add to his already impressive record of 20 stage wins in the Tour.

Bradley Wiggins had a tougher time in the last year when he crashed on stage seven and suffered a broken collarbone which meant he was unable to continue.

However, he has been in great form this season and with a strong team behind him, now including Cavendish, he should be able to challenge for the overall victory.

Having said that, it will not be easy given that he will have to face-off against the winners from the previous two years, Andy Schleck and Cadel Evans.

There is also the added complication that the Olympics start just a few days after the end of the Tour, and both Wiggins and Cavendish will want to make sure that they are in a good state to compete in London.

Freddie Caldwell

Unstoppable in 2011, but can Novak Djokovic retain h

THE OPEN

Last year’s open was an emotional affair as a favourite of British fans, Darren Clarke, took home the coveted Claret Jug, his first major title.

This year’s open at Royal Lytham St Annes comes at an exciting time for golf, with the majority of the world’s top players showing some degree of form in the season so far. Despite the wind and rain that normally characterises The Open, high scores on a hard links course makes for intense viewing leading up to Sunday night.

Masters’ Champion, Bubba Watson, will be looking to double his career major tally after an emotional win at Augusta, whilst Tiger Woods will be

The Courier

featuresport.43

Monday 7 May 2012

who will undoubtedly be eager to continue their recent run of success.

Next we have the Germans, who impressed at the last World Cup with their counter-attacking style, and should be an even better outfit this time around as a result of being a more matured unit spearheaded by Europe’s most in-form striker, Mario Gomez.

Add to this a touch of the drastically improved French, a drop of the alwaysfancied Dutch, a hint of the tactically astute Italians and of course, a handful of Team Ronaldo, and what we are left with is an enthralling few weeks of nonstop football, maybe with one or two surp-Roy-ses along the way!

Nick Gabriel

Who would you pick?

We asked our readers who they would take to Euro 2012 if they were in charge of England. This is what they said:

By Colin Henrys Sports Editor

Having been linked with the job on a number of occasions in recent years, Roy Hodgson has finally become the man in charge of England’s national football team.

However, he takes over a side that is still suffering the hangover of England’s poor performances at World Cup 2010 and now has several other dramas to contend with too: Who should be captain? Can John Terry be trusted? Is Frank Lampard past it? Can Terry and Rio Ferdinand play together? Who will replace Wayne Rooney while he is suspended? Who will play back-up to Joe Hart in goal?

The task of selecting a squad for Euro 2012 is certainly not an enviable one, but nevertheless, readers of The Courier have come to the fore and provided a few suggestions of their own for Hodgson to consider in the coming days.

GOALKEEPERS Our sample of managers were unanimous in their choice of number one goalkeeper. Manchester City’s Joe Hart, described by many of those asked as the best ‘keeper in the Premier League at the moment.

The choice of number two was more open, but with uncertainty over Ben Foster’s international career at the time of writing (although there are rumours that he may return from his retirement) most people tended to opt for Scott Carson. The final goalkeeper’s spot was just about edged by the as yet uncapped John Ruddy, meaning David Stockdale, Fraser Forster and Robert Green must all make alternate plans for their summers.

DEFENDERS

his Men’s Singles Title? Photography: Getty Images

looking for his first major win since the U.S Open in 2008, as he looks to recover some of the aura lost during his recent troubles off the course.

Eyes will be firmly set on Rory McIlroy, who, despite another failure in the year’s first major, will be eyeing up the chance to lift his second career major on British soil. The Northern Irishman briefly replaced Luke Donald at the top of the world rankings last month. However, a string of average performances has meant he has slipped back into second.

Wills Robinson

Across the survey, 14 different defenders were selected by those asked, although rather pointedly only one person put John Terry and Rio Ferdinand in the same squad. With questions over their fitness and form, and with Terry’s court hearing over the alleged racism aimed at Rio’s brother, neither harnessed enough votes for inclusion in the squad.

Instead, the two clear leaders at centre-back were Joleon Lescott of Manchester City and Gary Cahill of Chelsea.

There were3 also places in the squad for Phil Jagielka and Phil Jones.

At full-backs the voting was very similar across the board, with every body asked, choosing Ashley Cole, Micah Richards and Kyle Walker in their squads. Leighton Baines emerged as the clear leader for the fourth and final spot, leaving Glen Johnson, selected by just 13% of those polled, staying at home.

MIDFIELDERS The biggest debate in midfield was the same debate that has raged since Sven Goran Eriksson was in charge of the national team: Steven Gerrard, Frank Lampard or both.

Backed by a very vociferous support in the media, the emergence of Scott Parker in the centre seems to have finally put

Roy Hodgson will lead England into Euro 2012, but which players will he pick?

Photography: Getty Images

paid to them both playing together, but with Jack Wilshere injured both made the final squad. James Milner, praised for his versatility, was chosen as the fourth central midfielder.

On the flanks, Adam Johnson and Ashley Young received the backing of nearly all of those asked, but there was much more debate when it came to choosing between Theo Walcott, Aaron Lennon and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain.

The Ox was listed as the key player in the selection of one manager, but this was not an opinion reflected across the board, as Walcott edged selection, with Lennon selected by less than half.

Perhaps surprisingly, not a single manager selected Stewart Downing, while Gareth Barry and Michael Carrick also missed the hypothetical plane, despite both featuring regularly as the Manchester clubs have stormed to a guaranteed one-two Premier League finish.

FORWARDS

Hodgson’s biggest dilemma up front is not so much who to take, but will be who to play in the first match. Not one person asked would leave Wayne Rooney at home, but with him unavailable because of suspension in the first two group matches it begs the question of who will play instead.

The voting was spread fairly evenly across several other strikers, with Danny Welbeck just about scraping second ahead of Daniel Sturridge and Peter Crouch.

Given the large number of votes cast on the strikers, and the general uncertainty over who to take, it was decided to take five strikers in our hypothetical squad. This left Norwich’s Grant Holt and Tottenham’s Jermaine Defoe to fight it out for the final spot, and it went down to the final pick. In the end, Defoe made the plane with just one more vote than Holt.

Other strikers to miss out included Bobby Zamora, Darren Bent and Andy Carroll. The latter barely mustered a vote.

FINAL SQUAD Joe Hart GOALKEEPER “One of the best ‘keepers in the Premier League and probably a future England captain.”

Scott Carson GOALKEEPER “Best of a bad bunch for second choice ‘keeper.”

John Ruddy GOALKEEPER “Prone to errors but equally likely to pull off a wonder save.”

Kyle Walker DEFENDER “The PFA Young Player of the Year has been one of the revelations of the season for Spurs, performing well even during their recent slump.”

Micah Richards DEFENDER “Is an absolute monster and can fill in at CB if needed.”

Ashley Cole DEFENDER “Regardless of his off-field demeanours, on the pitch he is one of very few English players who can honestly be called world class.”

Leighton Baines DEFENDER “Could be useful in taking the inevitable penalty shootout with the Germans into sudden death.”

Joleon Lescott DEFENDER “Not the prettiest but has had a good season and like Cahill provides a threat from set pieces.”

Gary Cahill DEFENDER “If you’re going to have one Chelsea centre-back then this one seems less inclined to knee people in the backside.”

Phil Jagielka DEFENDER “A very under-rated defender who isn’t Terry or Ferdinand.”

Phil Jones DEFENDER “Maybe he can return to the glory days of the first half of the season.”

Ashley Young MIDFIELDER “To compete in Europe you need to be able to dive like the professionals.”

Adam Johnson MIDFIELDER “A goal threat and a nightmare to deal with for any full back, should have a fresh pair of legs and a warm arse from sitting on the bench most of the season.”

Theo Walcott MIDFIELDER “Has been known to be a goal threat

for England, frightning pace and a dangerous substitute.”

James Milner MIDFIELDER “Quite dull but also quite good at football.”

Scott Parker MIDFIELDER “Not half as good as people in the media claim he is, but still one of England’s best.”

Steven Gerrard MIDFIELDER “Should be captain but even without the armband his passion and commitment is unrivalled.”

Frank Lampard MIDFIELDER “Roberto Di Matteo has proved that when it comes to cup competitions, experience is best.”

Wayne Rooney STRIKER “Despite suspension still has still one group stage match to get sent off/shout at television cameras/grow more suspicious-looking hair.”

Danny Welbeck STRIKER “Plays so well with Rooney - is getting better and better.”

Daniel Sturridge STRIKER “Versatile player and has played alongside Welbeck before for under-21s.”

Peter Crouch STRIKER “his England record speaks for its self and he plays well with Defoe.”

Jermaine Defoe STRIKER “Always capable of something special or a goal from nothing.”

STARTING LINE-UP Sturridge

Welbeck

Young

Parker

Gerrard

Cole

Lescott

Cahill

Hart

A. Johnson

Walker

The Courier

intramuralsport.45

Monday 8 May 2012

They all fought the Law, but the Law won Barca wrap up double as Martin brace sinks Crayola in final match of season

INTRA MURAL FOOTBALL WEDS DIVISION ONE Barca Law Na

4

Crayola

0

Barca finished a turbulent season on and off the pitch in style at Longbenton on Wednesday afternoon, thrashing Crayola 4-0 to seal the Division One title and complete a remarkable period that saw them win three trophies in the space of seven days.

Success in the Cup final last week against Dyslexic was followed by victory in the National Law Tournament and they have now become the first team, other than the Medics, to secure the Wednesday League title since the now obsolete Real Ma-Dividend in 2008.

Despite the fairly resounding scoreline the Lawyers were made to work hard for the three points, with Ben Storey in the Crayola goal in supreme form pulling off save after save for the handful of spectators.

The game started at a timid pace considering what was at stake, with Barca needing a win to secure the title, and neither team created any clear chances in the opening 10 minutes of play.

Foley shot wide for Barca when presented with a chance after some intricate build-up play between Tim Rakshi and Jamie Hurworth, before Rakshi then fluffed his own lines when failing to connect with a Hurworth cross from the left.

Barca took the lead, following the awarding of a free-kick on the edge of Crayola’s penalty area, that quickly evolved into a penalty after the defending side brought down one of the Barca attackers when failing to clear the initial set piece.

Foley stepped up and dispatched the

Foley (pen 26), Martin 48, 72, Womersley (own goal 85)

By Charlie Scott at LONGBENTON

Wadhams

Hoctor

Beahon

Allinson

Ingram

Bagot

Rawlings

Foley

Martin

Rakshi Hurworth

Storey

Sayer

Rech

Thompson

Turner

Bexon

Darroch

Graham Womersley

Moat

Storey

penalty low to Storey’s right, although the Crayola ‘keeper will feel aggrieved to have been beaten as he got a hand to the strike.

Crayola had chances to equalise at this point, and perhaps should have when two opportunities in as many minutes were passed up with weak strikes at goal.

Rich Martin twice came close to extending the home side’s lead, heading into the side netting from close range and then forcing a smart double save from Storey as Barca threw men forward in search of the goals that would seal their championship win.

Despite the increased urgency of the Lawyers, Crayola’s defence stood firm, putting in a series of crunching tackles and blocks that kept the scoreline respectable at half-time.

After weathering the Barca storm towards the end of the first half, the floodgates opened shortly into the second as Martin finished off a fine team move that again involved the two Barca forwards, Hurworth and Rakshi.

Martin nearly increased their lead shortly after but was thwarted by yet another save from the heavens by Storey, who confirmed his place in The Courier’s Intra Mural Team of the Year with another performance straight from the very top drawer.

Should Crayola have got anything from this match, the scope for journalistic punnery with their ‘keeper’s name would have known no bounds.

Even the Barca team were impressed by the Crayola ‘keeper, with Hurworth

RIch Martin, Barca’s cup final hero, scored two more to secure his team the title Photography: Hubert Lam

later informing me he attempted to tap up Storey while attacking a corner in the first half.

Barca made it 3-0 on 72 minutes when Martin grabbed his second of the afternoon, latching on to a fine McKee pass before slotting the ball past Storey.

With five minutes left to play Crayola right-back Tom Womersley scored the goal of the game for Barca, nonchalantly glancing a header past his own keeper and into the top corner after Martin had lifted a cross into the area.

The visitors nearly notched a consolation goal late on when Sam Storey shot

League Tables

INTRA MURAL IN-BRIEF 7-A-SIDE FOOTBALL

Wednesday 11-a-side Football

Division 2

Division 1 Team

Pld

W

D

L

F

A

Pts

1

Barca Law Na

12

9

1

2

50

15

28

2

Newcastle Medics 1sts

12

8

2

2

36

20

26

3

Henderson Hall

12

7

1

4

41

29

22

Division 3

Team

Pld

W

D

(C)

Newcastle Medics 2nds

14

11

3

2

Boroussia Forsyth

14

10

0

L

F

A

Pts

0

47

10

36

(C)

Roman Villa FC

13

12

0

1

52

7

36

4

43

21

30

(P)

Politic Thistle

14

11

0

3

46

21

30* 20

Team

Pld

W

D

L

F

A

Pts

3

Lokomotiv

14

9

2

3

49

30

29

3

Shakhtar FC

14

6

2

6

23

22

4

Ecosoccer

14

7

1

6

52

34

22

4

Brown Magic FC

14

5

2

7

34

35

17

5

The Hurricanes

14

7

1

6

49

34

22

5

NCL Galacticos

11

5

0

6

27

32

15

6

Boca Seniors

14

4

Dyslexic Untied

12

6

1

5

32

26

19

14

5

0

9

36

41

15

6

Jesmondino FC

12

4

2

6

19

25

5

Crayola

12

5

0

7

18

22

15

(R) Newhist FC

14

1

2

11

18

75

5

7

Newcastle Dynamos

13

3

0

10

21

48

9

(R) Aftermath

12

3

0

9

14

47

9

(R) Ar U Shavin A Laugh

14

1

1

12

18

67

4

8

Combined Honours

13

3

0

10

15

47

9

(R) Castle Leazes

12

1

1

10

12

42

4

Top Goalscorers

10: Liam McAllister (Hendo) 10: Daniel Rech (Crayola) 9: Dave Eccles (Aftermath)

14: Jamie Hurworth (Barca) 12: Dave Edwards (Medics)

Barca Law Na Crayola

Top Goalscorers 18: Josh Batham (Ecosoccer) 18: Adam Duckworth (H’anes)

Netball

Rugby Union

4pm-5pm

Division 1

Top Goalscorers

9: Lewis Cockerill (B Magic) 8: Rob Grady (Roman Villa) 8: Ollie Griffiths (Roman Villa)

16: James Dunn (P Thistle) 11: Tom Islip (Roman Villa)

Group A Pts

Uni Hockey

44

Mansoc

14

10

1

3

164

90

42

3

Leazes Ladies

14

10

0

4

166

113

4

Net Assets

14

8

1

5

184

135

18

5

Biology Netball

14

7

2

5

137

179

18

6

CHS

14

4

2

8

98

150

14

7

Agrics B

14

2

2

6

50

261

8

8

RRE

14

0

0

8

46

272

1

Team

Pld

W

D

1

Netball Ninjas

12

11

2

Agrics

12

3

Polly’s Dollies

4

Chem Eng

5

Pld

Team

Pld

W

D

L

F

A

(C)

Agrics

7

7

0

0

16

4

21

2

Larrikins

7

5

0

2

25

7

15

40

3

BioSci Hockey Legends

7

4

0

3

15

10

12

34

4

Oral Specialists

7

3

1

3

14

9

10

126

32

5

Law School

7

3

0

4

12

15

9

141

144

20

6

Pink Panthers

6

3

0

3

7

18

9

10

94

172

12

7

MLS

6

1

1

4

5

12

4

14

24

233

0

8

NUTS

7

0

0

7

4

23

0

L

F

A

Pts

Team

Pld

W

D

L

F

A

1

0

178

73

46

(C)

Toon Raiders

5

5

0

0

18

3

15

10

1

1

210

75

42

2

The Gunners

6

4

1

1

13

4

13

12

7

0

5

160

128

28

3

Green Sticks

5

2

0

3

12

12

6

12

5

0

7

106

132

20

4

NUSSC

4

1

2

1

9

6

5

CHS

12

5

0

7

135

163

20

5

Black Panthers

6

1

2

3

2

15

5

6

NUSSC

12

2

1

9

64

150

10

6

Mojoholics

4

1

1

2

5

9

4

7

The History Girls

12

0

1

11 41

173

2

7

Combined Honours

6

1

0

5

7

17

3

Pld

W

D

L

F

A

Pts

(C)

Armstrong

8

7

0

1

290

40

35

(C)

2

Titans

8

7

0

1

219

43

30

2

3

Agrics 1

8

5

1

2

161

104

25

4

Southern Fairies

8

4

0

4

185

117

22

5

Larrikins

8

4

0

4

118

134

6

Cheeky Ladies

8

3

1

4

133

7

Engines

8

3

0

5

8

Agrics 2

8

2

0

9

Medics

8

0

0

5pm-6pm

Football (All matches kick off at 2pm unless otherwise stated) Wednesday 9 May DIV THREE Longbenton 2

FC Jagerbomb stormed to their second 7-a-side title of the year after beating Thornton’s Massive 5-2 in the final at Longbenton on Wednesday.

The title - their fourth in as many years - follows similar success in the winter, although it was not always plain sailing for them.

It took a penalty shootout to overcome another set of ‘bombs - the Rodallegabombs - in the semi-finals, while Thornton’s Massive had secured three big wins in two weeks to book their place in the semi-final before knocking Sons of Pitches out to join FC Jagerbomb in the final.

Rodallegabombs went on to secure third place.

11-A-SIDE FOOTBALL

Mixed Hockey

Intra Mural W D L F A <<<<>>> 14 11 0 round-up 3 212 109

Team

Team

NCL Galacticos vs Jesmondino FC

13: Jake Wimshurst (Shavin) 12: Zack Goddard (Ecosoccer) 10: Archie Norman (Forsyth)

Newcastle Medics 2nds 3 Lokomotiv 3

4 0

This week’s Intra Mural Fixtures

over after racing past Paul Wadhams.

Barca co-captain and Division One topscorer Jamie Hurworth spoke after the game of his relief that his team had “managed to hold their nerve to complete a treble in the space of a week”.

Hurworth spoke openly of how, despite a “tough year on and off the pitch”, his side had enjoyed “the most successful season in the club’s eight year history”.

He went on to thank “Crayola’s ringers that battered the Medics before Easter”, while also thanking Medics themselves “for bottling it.”

Pts

Group B Pts

Lokomotiv narrowly missed out on promotion back to the First Division after a three-year absence as they drew 3-3 with Medics Seconds in the final match of the turbulent Division Two season.

A win would have seen Loko go up with the Medics Seconds, but the draw means that Boroussia Forsyth have bounced straight back into the top division after their relegation last season.

In the Saturday competition there was further success for the Medics Seconds as they defeated Redchester FC to secure cup success.

With their Firsts having faltered so frequently this season, the success of the Seconds means it is now two trophies that they have beaten the Firsts to, as they earlier won the National Medics tournament in Dundee, after the First team were knocked out in the quarterfinals.

46.sportintramural

Monday 7 May 2012

The Courier

Intra Mural review: devastation, Sports Editors Colin Henrys, Harry Slavin and Rory Brigstock-Barron on yet another enthralling season of Intra Mural football

Division One 1. BARCA LAW NA

The Champions elect had an unforgettable season, pulling off the Wednesday League and Cup double for the first time in their history.

Despite off-field controversy mid way through the season, Barca consistently delivered on the pitch, there 4-0 drubbing of Crayola last Wednesday confirming their position at the summit of the Intra Mural ladder. Captain Dan Allinson, never short on praise for his teammates all season, was thrilled with the attitude they displayed throughout the year. “In the end the strong unity within the squad has shone through” stated Allinson, who reserved special praise for striker Jamie Hurworth and midfield maestro Dave Bagot, two of the stars that drove Barca’s season.

2. NEWCASTLE MEDICS 1s

A season marred by injury, course commitments and an aging squad finished in slightly disappointing fashion for the Medics 1sts, but captain Davison is adamant that his side can look back on the last nine months with their heads held high.

Having beaten Barca Law Na on both occasions in the league, the medics can justifiably feel aggrieved at their runners-up position, but Davison felt the results showed his side are still one of the biggest forces within the Intra Mural community and with golden boy Dave Edwards sticking around next season along with a whole host of this years squad, next season could provide the perfect remedy for this season failures.

3. HENDERSON HALL

Once again Henderson Hall are left to

reflect on a season of disappointment.

The brides maids of Intra Mural football lacked any sort of consistency during the season, losing on the opening day to an Aftermath side that would struggle all season and ultimately suffer relegation, while also being able to produce displays worthy of any table topping side, including a 9-2 thumping of Dyslexic According to captain Matty Alsop a lack of quality in the depth of the squad was a big factor in the team tailing off in the home straight. Victory in the cup eluded Hendo yet again this year, losing to eventual winners Barca Law Na in the semi-final, a frustrating match that epitomised the Orange and Black’s season.

A third place finish is no disgrace and with the players such as target man Liam McAllister sticking around next season there is a solid platform to build on for the 2012/13 season.

4. DYSLEXIC UNTIED

A good season was millimetres away from becoming a great season for Dyslexic but they couldn’t add to their fourth place finish with silverware in the Wednesday Cup. Chris Smith’s men succumbed to an agonising 1-0 defeat at the hands of Barca Law Na in the final, despite hitting the woodwork on numerous occasions.

However the team can be pleased with their overall performance for the season and can look forward to next season with excitement having secured top flight status for another year.

5. CRAYOLA

According to Crayola captain Ben Storey, there are two words that go an awful long way to telling the story behind the success of Crayola’s season; Daniel Rech. The talismanic forward has been a formidable force in the First Division this year, bagging ten goals and almost

single-handedly dragging his side away from a relegation scrap. Describing him as ‘a powerhouse, yet nimble’, Storey could not speak highly enough of his superstar striker. “Always the first to training, and the last to leave the field, this perfectionist has been the heartbeat of the side both on and off the field.”

While Crayola retained there top flight status, it remains to be seen how easily they will be able to hold on to their status next season with the likes of Rech and Storey moving on to bigger and better things.

6. AFTERMATH

It was always going to be hard season for Aftermath having lost many key players from the side that helped gain promotion from the Second Division in the 2010/11 season.

Despite starting the season in spectacular style, humbling Intra Mural stalwarts Henderson Hall on the opening day of the season, Aftermath’s season failed to live up to the early hype and the side eventually found themselves sucked into a relegation battle that they ultimately lost. Despite this disappointment, Captain Pete Watts said the team good leave the Division with their heads held high after an impressive cup run to the semi final and a few scalps taken from the First Division.

7. CASTLE LEAZES

This season was a completely forgettable experience for a relatively inexperienced Leazes side as they propped up the First Division for the entire season. With only one win to their name all season the team struggled with the pace and power of the top tier and will subsequently be plying their trade in the Second Division next year, where promotion back to the top flight is by no means a certainty.

Division Two

1. NEWCASTLE MEDICS 2s

Newcastle Medics 2nds draw agains Lokomotiv last weeksaw them finish their Wednesday league campaign as unbeaten force. Expectations were high at the beginning of the season, and Captain James Rammell maintains that promotion to the Wednesday top flight was always the main priority. Rammell was full of praise for his teams performance all over the pitch throughout the season; “our miserly defence, marshalled with incredible class by Sidney Parker was only bettered by our ruthlessness in front of goal”.

2. BOROUSSIA FORSYTH

Boroussia Forsyth were made to sweat over their promotion to the Wednesday First Division after their 3-1 defeat to The Hurricanes, but top flight status was achieved thanks to Lokomotiv’s inability to defeat the Medics 2nds in the final match of the season. Captain Alex Bell will be thrilled his side have managed to secure a return to the top flight at the first time of asking, with influential players such as Jack Minshaw instrumental in the team’s successful campaign.

3. LOKOMOTIV Newcaste Medics Seconds celebrate winning national Medics 7s tournament Photography: Newcastle Medics

Lokomotiv will ultimately look back on this year’s campaign as a failure having missed out on promotion by just a single point. While 3-3 draw with Medics 2nds was quite possibly one of the games of the season, it will come as no consolation to Sam Turnock and his side as they face the prospect of a third

straight season in the second tier. The signs of team spirit were always on show during Loko’s season, however a lack of consistency means the Red and Blacks will have to pick up the pieces and continue their assault on the summit of the Second Division for another year.

4. ECOSOCCER

With only four players from the previous season’s campaign available for selection, Ecosoccer approached this season knowing a completely new team set up and dynamic was the only option, but were quietly optimistic of a push for promotion. After a promising start this confidence proved justified. However, failure to beat fellow promotion contenders in the more important fixtures and with injuries and placements in the second half of the campaign, Ecosoccer slipped into a warranted mid-table 4th place position.

5. HURRICANES

The perennial underachievers of the Intra Mural football league did not disappoint as once again early season murmurs of a push for promotion were drowned out by fears of relegation before they eventually settled for mid-table obscurity. Captain Nick Gibby was always going to have a difficult job on his hands, especially with some of his players attitudes towards drink, hampering team performance on too many occasions to mention. In the end a fifth placed finish is a fair reflection on a season where ability only ever shone threw in glimpses.

6. BOCA SENIORS

Another side with early season aspirations of promotion, Charlie Rowley and his team struggled to surmount any real

The Courier

intramuralsport.47

Monday 7 May 2012

delight and drama attack on the top two places in the Second Division. The side were comfortably in mid-table throughout the season and despite finishing just one space above the relegation zone, Second tier status was never really in doubt. Rowley was grateful for his side’s efforts throughout the season, stating, “the lads have played some incredible football and despite a mid season downfall all has been very positive this year.”

7. NEWHIST FC

After the ominous prediction from The Courier of a bottom place finish, and a nightmare start where they conceded 14 goals in two matches, Newhist’s season wasn’t shaping up to be much fun.

However, a famous draw against Newcastle Medics 2nds and their first, and to date only, win against Ar U Shavin A Laugh saw them exceed all expectations and shove a middle finger up to the doom-mongering press by finishing seventh.

In truth Newhist were put in too high a league for their debut season, but Captain Colin Henrys explained that this was no bad thing. “We will only benefit from our experiences against some of the much better Intra Mural teams... a top-half finish in the Third Division is certainly not beyond the team next year.”

8. R U SHAVIN A LAUGH

Barca Law Na celebrate the first part of an impressive double after their cup victory over Dyslexic Photography: Hubert Lam

After two consecutive promotions as league champions, Ar U Shavin A Laugh had, in their captain’s own words, ‘a nightmare of a season’. One win, one draw and countless defeats was never going to be good enough to secure survival in the Second tier. Despite strong performances from star man Jake Wimshurst, the side struggled to react to losing a majority of last years promotion winning players.

Division Three 1. ROMAN VILLA Villa have had a sensational year under the stewardship of Rob Grady and the team romped to the Third Division Title in style, losing just one game all season long. The team openly felt aggrieved at being placed in the bottom division despite thumping all comers the season before in the fourth division, and their feelings appeared justified as they continued to defeat all in front of them this year.

2. POLITIC THISTLE

Despite achieving the number one priority of promotion to the Second Division, Politic Thistle’s season has been tinged with disappointment as glory was snatched away from them in both competitions. Having run Roman Villa close for the title, Nick Graham and his men felt they were even closer to cup glory, but the cruellest of defeats to First Division outfit Aftermath on penalties robbed them of a chance to grace the Semi Final.

3. SHAKTHAR FC

Robbie Cachia’s orange army suffered the frustration of missing out on the play-offs by just one place, however their third place finish isn’t quite assured due to Galacticos’ games in hand.

Shakthar were forced to change their name half way through the season in controversial circumstances and the off-field episode appeared to affect the clubs form, picking up just two victories in the second half of the season as their promotion charge stuttered.

4. BROWN MAGIC

Having only narrowly missed out on promotion last year it’s safe to say Brown Magic can be a little disheartened by their performance in this years Third Division. Captain James Burns is relieved that despite a mass exodus this year the team will be carrying on, so the Magic can continue.

5. JESMONDINO

start to their 11-a-side lives when they finished bottom of the Third Division.

This year has seen an improvement of sorts however, and while they remain inconsistent they have secured five wins and sit comfortably in mid-table.

They have also drawn the attention of their fellow Intra Mural players thanks to their exuberant goal celebrations, no matter what the situation in the game.

6. NCL GALACTICOS

With two games still to play, Galacticos season isn’t quite over; however the pre-season goal of promotion has long been out of the grasp of Claudio Carvalho and his men. The Galacticos burst onto the scene at the beginning of the year with a range of impressive displays and results but unfortunately the side was unable to maintain its early season mentality. Whilst the form of the likes of Intra Mural sensation Carlos Totti lit up the Third Division at the start of the campaign, a heavy loss to the eventual sent the Galacticos crashing down to earth and they never really recovered.

7. NEWCASTLE DYNAMOS

Newcomers to the 11-a-side league having stepped up from 7-a-side level in the summer, Neal Lees’ side endured a torrid start to the season. With no points from the first seven matches of the season, Lees confesses that ‘the whole squad was praying for a victory’.

It finally arrived with a hard fought win against Shakhtar, and they went on to secure victories in their next two matches. Their three match winning streak saw them come from behind in all three matches too.

8. COMBINED HONOURS

Guy Bell’s side got their Intra Mural careers off to a flying start with a win over fellow newcomers Newcastle Dynamos on the first day of the season, but narrow defeats in their next two matches were followed by a hefty reverse at the hands of Roman Villa. From there on, Combined found themselves at the wrong end of the table, and slipped to rock bottom as a result of the resurgent form of the Dynamos.

The Courier’s Intra Mural XI GK: BEN STOREY CRAYOLA

The Crayola stopper has been sensational this season. Storey has left many Courier reporters bemused, single handedly keeping his side in several games.

CB: TOM ISLIP ROMAN VILLA Unplayable in the air and infalable from the spot, Islip’s 11 goals were crucial to Villa’s title win, an incredible tally considering he usually plays at the back.

CB: DAN ALLINSON BARCA LAW NA

Allinson has been a real leader for Barca this season in what has been a remarkable campaign. He’s also waded in with some invaluable goals for his side.

CB: DAVE GARDINER MEDICS 2s

CM: DAVE EDWARDS MEDICS 1s

It was a coin toss between Dave and his defensive partner Sid Parker as the Division two winners conceded less than half as many as any other side in the league.

Scorer of some sensational goals, including a contender for goal of the season against Dyslexic, fresher Edwards has impressed all this season, a great find for the Medics.

RM: JAMES RAMMEL MEDICS 2s

LM: JOSH BATHAM ECOSOCCER

The Medics 2s captain lead his side to an unbeaten campaign in Divison two, as well as an incredibly impressive victory in the national medics 7s tournament.

CM: ROB GRADY ROMAN VILLA Good in the air, acoomplished on the ground and an eye for goal. The whole of the Third Divison were unanimous that Grady be included.

Rufus Parsons’ team suffered a terrible

Scoring for fun this season, Batham is the top scorer across all three leagues, collecting several match balls on the way, helping his side to a respectable 4th.

ST: JAMIE HURWORTH BARCA LAW NA The First Divison’s top scorer had to be one of the first names on the team sheet. Four goals in a 9-0 win over Aftermath just one of many terrific performances.

Storey

Islip

Rammell

Grady

Hurworth

ST: ADAM DUCKWORTH HURRICANES “Ducky” has been lethal this season in a side that has been indifferent to say the least. His latest outing saw him net twice against promoted Boroussia Forsyth.

Allinson(C) Gardiner

Edwards

Duckworth

Totti

ST: CARLOS TOTTI GALACTICOS

Totti became an Intra Mural legend when he won the player of the month award for October. The cultured attacker’s skill is undoubted, a true Intra Mural Galactico.

Batham

Sport

www.thecourieronline.co.uk Monday 7 May 2012 Issue 1251 Free

FIND OUT WHO MADE OUR INTRA MURAL TEAM OF THE YEAR

thecourieronline.co.uk/sport

IM, P47

Netball have promotion in their sights

BUCS, p.39 Photography: NUNC

LAX thrash St Andrews in Premiership play-off WOMEN’S LACROSSE St Andrews 1sts Newcastle 1sts

3 15

By Hannah Fisher at St Andrews Newcastle Women’s Lacrosse roundedoff an outstanding season with promotion to the Premier League after a 15-3 domination of St Andrews in Scotland.

The Firsts have proved themselves this season in a number of tough and highly important matches. Seeing off archrivals Durham twice in one season, becoming BUCS Trophy champions 2012 and their success in the Northern 1A division has lead them to playoffs for a place in the Northern Premier League.

Last week the first matches took place, and Nottingham crumbled at Cochrane Park under the pressure of playoffs and the perfection of the Newcastle side, with the final score standing at 13-3. It was then just one team that stood between the girls and a deserved promotion back to the Premiership – St. Andrews.

After an early start the girls arrived in Scotland not expecting nor finding an easy path to the Premiership. The first 10 minutes proved to be extremely close and were played at a high intensity, with

the predominantly American ‘Scottish’ side strong and winning the vast majority of draws. This somewhat unnerved the Newcastle team, who were accustomed to coming out of centres with possession, hence putting them on the back foot from the outset. Nevertheless they fought hard and at 15 minutes the score stood at 2-2.

Once the team began to settle down, the majority of the attacking play came in Newcastle’s favour, and opportunities

LUCY PINKERTON

This Player of the Match’s stick work was too solid for the opposition and her drives caused havock all afternoon as she helped guide her team to a well deserved promotion

created through some brilliantly executed set plays were converted to goals.

With the scoreboard slowly tipping in the Royal’s favour, confidence built and the half-time score sat at 5-2.

St. Andrews weren’t prepared for the force of the team that stepped onto the pitch in the second half. Their fancy American style stick-work became slack, and Newcastle stuck to their players like their shadows in order to dis-

possess and win the turnover balls.

The Royals settled into their own game, and allowed St. Andrews to make the mistakes. It seems persistence is key and Newcastle began to dominate the game, with some fantastic attacking work from Serena Pelly and Emily Cullen in attack leading to yet more goals.

The defence stood solid, and any Scottish attacks that came their way headed straight into the stick of ‘The Interceptor’, Katie ‘Taggy’ Tagg.

Some ruthless, no mercy tackles from Fran ‘Franny’ Andrews re-gained any balls that were not snatched by Taggy, and Laura Bolton was swift to collect the groundballs. Midfield play flowed, transitions between defence and attack beautifully orchestrated by Sarah ‘Lloydy’ Lloyd were by no means ‘last-minute’ and the attacks were given plenty of opportunity to slot away more goals.

Player of the Match Lucy Pinkerton’s outstanding stick-work was too solid for St. Andrews to break and her unrivalled drives to goal and settled attack play were an integral part of the teams success across the border. The final score, a Royals victory, 15-3.

If the girls have proved anything this year, it’s that hard work and team spirit really do pay off. Promotion to the Premiership: a perfect and fitting end to a truly sensational season.

BARCA CLINCH LEAGUE TITLE IM, P45

Photography: Hubert Lam

THE BEST OF THE REST: 2012

OLYMPICS, P40-1

Photography: Getty Images