GSM ed. 2 vol. 3 "Home"

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E. 2 V. 3



The Reviews

4 Editorial 5 Contextualise This!

21 Arts

6 Vox Pops

24 Books

7 Zombie-proof Your Home

26 Interview: Alan Carter

8 Your Guide to Share Housing

27 Film

10 Human Homes

29 Games

11 Digital Homes

30 Music

12 Future Technologies 13 Meet the Parents 14 At Home in the Office 15 Migrating Identities 16 Home on the Range 17 Finding Home 18 Home Truths 19 Our Terrestrial Home 20 Down & Out in Freo

Writers’ Night #3

“MASCULINITY” Monday May 7 ML Lib. Seminar Room 5pm - 7pm Find us on Facebook

Editor: Tom Reynolds editor.gsm@gmail.com GSM - ECU 2 Bradford Street Mount Lawley WA 6050 Cover: Ali Alatas - www.alialatas.com Layout: Tom Reynolds Printed by: Images: Jacky Le (pg 3, 11 & 20), Wenjie Zheng (17), Jason Dirstein (7, 9 &12), Alvin Foeng (15), Liam Lucas (18), D’Arcy Ellis (8), Ali Ghalib Al Ogaily (10), Evonne Lai (13), Manuel Mendoza (16), Ali Alatas (cover, 6 & 14) Editing Team: Asten Nunn, Divya Jankee, Aldy Hendradjaja, Ashley Swetman, Alesha Sills, Jacky Le, Rehana Badat, Delshard Mozhdehinia, Mimi Rukmarata, Rosemarie Dale, Rafeif Osman, Dina Waluyo, James Blackurn, Evan Roberts, Larry Fife. Want to get involved with our sections? Arts: Aldy Hendradjaja arts.editor.gsm@gmail.com Books: Divya Jankee books.editor.gsm@gmail.com Film: Dina Waluyo film.editor.gsm@gmail.com Games: Chris Gibson games.editor.gsm@gmail.com Music: Shaun Cowe music.editor.gsm@gmail.com Photography: Ali Alatas photography.gsm@gmail.com Advertising: Tom Reynolds (08) 9370 6609

The views expressed in this publication are not necessarily those of the Editor, ECU Student Guild or the Advertisers. GSM is editorially independent. The Editor reserves the right to make changes to material as required. GSM reserves the right to republish material. Contributors retain all other rights for resale and republication.

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Editorial

Are you a dude or do you know someone who is male? You should consider attending our writers’ night on Monday May 7th. The theme is “masculinity” and you can write on anything remotely related. It’s in the library Seminar Room from 5pm. We will also be feeding you with free pizza from Italians Restaurant. If you can’t attend but think you might be interested shoot me an email: editor.gsm@ gmail.com No previous experience is required. As always, gentle reader, a polite reminder: our writers’ nights are a social event, and an open forum. If you are likely offended by blasphemy, swearing, puerile humour, and frank discussions about sex, drugs and smooth late night jazz please use your discretion before attending. It’s our belief that irreverence is a virtue.

INTERIOR DESIGN V0508 – 3D Illustration for Interior Designers Interested in going digital with your Presentations and Perspectives? Learn the basic skills required to produce amazing visuals that will impress. From initial 3D Modelling with Google Sketchup Pro 8, to generating Photorealistic Renderings with Podium V2 and finally applying some simple Post Processing techniques on Photoshop to give your work quality finish.

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Special thanks to: the folks who came in to proofread during the study break & my mum for baking the cupcakes they were bribed with. Adrian, the work experience kid. The 20 or so students who responded to our request for illustrations – and the folks who submitted their artwork for publication (and all on time too!) Caroline J Dale for her last minute contribution (she’s a kick-arse musician and you should like her on Facebook). Asten & Aldy for their additional services to vanquishing typos. Kayt, who spent her precious lunchbreak examining proofs with me. Vicky (& co.) at the Uni. Of Melbs for promptly sending me back copies of their student magazine, Farrago – much appreciated. The very patient security staff at ML who have dealt with my daily requests for door openings/closings. And finally, my friend Evan, for telling me something important without realising it (I’m not just talking about your sex habits). No thanks to: crime. Specifically the person who smashed in my car window and stole my office keys. Also the person who stole my frozen Up & Go from the Guild fridge today. I hope it chills you, TO THE PIT OF YOUR SOUL. Tom Reynolds editor.gsm@gmail.com Building 12 ML – The Guild

CREATIVE COMPUTER & 3D DESIGN

You learn more in the City.

Short courses

Some fantastic news! GSM can now claim the prestigious title of “WA’s second most popular student publication on Facebook”. I know. Let that sink in a moment. We’re now officially more popular than those hacks at Murdoch Uni’s METIOR. If you have a Facebook (seriously?) I encourage you to like us (we offer free stuff sometimes) and help us maintain our claim to such a prestigious title.

V0407 – Getting started with SolidWorks Use SolidWorks and learn essential modelling commands and tips to generate fully rendered components in 3D and effortlessly produce technical drawings. From plastic, metal or glass, to the whole car, learn why SolidWorks is a chosen CAD package for Product and Industrial Design and Engineering.

V0509 – Computer Rendering for Interior Designers & Decorators Podium Photorealistic Rendering is the perfect program for any design enthusiast who’s looking to produce incredible photorealistic renderings of their designs and concepts. Podium V2 is a powerful rendering engine which focuses in combining simplicity of use, with rapid rendering speeds resulting in high quality renders in an exceptionally short period of time. Acquire the skills to produce stunning renders with efficiency and ease. V0512 – Introduction to Photoshop for Interior Designers & Decorators This course focuses on providing Interior Designers with the knowledge on how to take their Presentation Boards and Digital Rendered Perspectives to the next level. From simple post processing techniques, to setting up full presentation boards, learn the tips and tricks to achieve incredible results on Photoshop.

V0426 – Getting started with Inventor This course is suitable for anyone interested in how this software compares to what they are currently using or how it’s used to develop 3D concepts on computer and produce drawings for manufacture. From plastics, metals or furniture to complex mechanical design and FEA. V0370 – Rhinoceros 4.0 Beginners (Windows) Learn basic 2D and 3D precision and freeforming modelling using Rhinoceros. This program can be utilised by spatial, jewellery, industrial, graphic designers in multimedia and by the serious hobbyist. Learn the basic commands in designing a range of objects such as Ipods, brilliant cut stone with setting and furniture pieces.

V0424 – Design Concepts using Sketchup Would you like to visualise your design concepts in 3D? You will learn how easy it is to design and model anything from buildings, interior spaces, landscape designs and even items of furniture. As the final course output, export your models as impressive walkthrough animations. V 0511 – Introduction to After Effects for Graphic Designers using CS5.5 In this exciting course, you will be guided in the use of Adobe After Effects, the industry standard for motion graphics. Acquire the skills to create video promos and film titles. V0504 – Introduction to 3D With Maxon’s Cinema 4D Studio software, which is a great starting point for other 3D software, develop the skills to navigate and create within the 3D environment, render images to multiple formats and develop content for various digital mediums.

Courses commence week beginning Monday 7 May, 2012.

For course prerequisites, dates, times, cost and enrolment procedure contact: Linda.kemp@central.wa.edu.au www.central.wa.edu.au


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You just know whatever comes out of the speakers’ mouth next is going to be pure gold, how could it not be? The speaker believes they hold divinely imparted, top secret information which excuses the filth that they contaminate the social-sphere with, and further proves any ideas that you might have had that this person is a butt-scraping jerkwad who makes a damned fine argument for the reintroduction of some medieval justice. I do not enjoy their nincompoopery but sometimes, you just have to hand someone their arse on a plate & that’s the bit I like. There is no finer sport to be had than raving neo-nazi c-words who think they are superior to all “others” under the delusion that the colour of their skin makes them “specialler”, and messing with their philosophies. White is sure as fuck not right and you don’t have to be a particular colour, religion or status to be a racist prick. Yargh, the eternal question - How to walk away when faced with pure unadulterated stupidity? I believe people are all the same and have the ability to be good or bad, raise others’ up/or tear them down. It comes down to the examples around them - parents. Seems to me that idiots tend to breed idiots. Who then breed more idiots. Kids don’t even know what the word racist implies and don’t get inferences of skin colour until some jackass uses the phrase: “I’m not racist but…” without the joiner: “I know someone who is”. Opinion by Shezzam

As soon as I hear that, I tell myself: ‘Watch out! Something racist is going to come out of their mouth!’ Sure enough, in most cases, that’s exactly what happens. The notion of racism is extremely subjective. It varies from individual to individual depending on their upbringing, their culture, their beliefs, their values and so forth. However, the question that arises is: can we get rid of it? Personally, it is a phrase that I avoid using. Not only because being racist is “bad” but because of the simple reason that if I use it, I would be perceived as racist. That does not mean to say I am not racist. In my head, I do sometimes make a racist comment or judgment. The only difference is that I don’t say it openly. In my (humble) opinion, no one can really say ‘I am not racist’. If that were true, then stand up comedians like Russell Peters who make fun of different races by bringing up stereotypes would not be so successful. We tolerate racism much more than we think. Nowadays, we look down upon racism and discourage ‘racist comments’, but we still make them. We might not say them aloud but they have popped in our minds every once in a while. Sometimes, people will be racist towards their own people like in the case of India’s casteproblem. Nevertheless, this does not make it legitimate. To quote Ling-Ling from ‘Drawn Together’: “Unnecessary racism so sad!” but we can rarely help it, least of all get rid of it. According to me, there can never be a racism-free world so the least we can do is not to use racist comments to deliberately hurt someone.

I figure my columns might quickly get boring since my answer will always boil down to this: appropriateness is determined by context, intent and consequence. So allow me to skip ahead of my own conclusion and say this instead, I love “I’m not racist but…” It’s a quick, efficient and socially banal way to introduce your self to mixed company as a racist. The only thing more frightening to a white person than seeing a group of Aboriginal youths at night, or boarding a plane with Muslim passengers, is being called a racist. This is because white people carry around a deeply ingrained sense of guilt about their white privilege. So much so that they even whisper the term “reverse racism” to describe the racism of non-whites as if Caucasians owned the collective copyright to the concept. Classic whities, they can’t even stand to share an abhorrent idea with the Black/Asian/Brown masses without claiming original proprietary. White people hate being called racist. Which is ironic considering how prolific racism is in our society (Black, White, Asian or otherwise). I guess it’s not racism unless someone calls it. “I’m not racist but…” is a nice little escape clause “I’m not racist, so even though what I’m about to say sounds racist it’s not – because I’ve just provided myself with this disclaimer’. Very rarely do you hear ‘I don’t mean to sound racist but…’ and I think that tells you volumes about the true intentions of the speaker. Opinion by Rupert Voysey

Opinion by Divya Jankee

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GSM asks... What did you want to be as a kid? What do you want to see in the future? What do you think of the food on campus?

Robert / 25 / Advertising & Creative Services

Dani / 21 / WAAPA Broadcasting

Channel / 21 / Broadcasting & Journalism

1] A pilot 2] Teleporting 3] Expensive but the staff make it worth it

1] Actress 2] A flying car 3] I enjoy it. Cafe 10 rocks

1] Actress on Bold and the Beautiful 2] Equal marriage rights 3] Comos at Aroma are good

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The world is trying to kill you. From global warming to the depletion of the ozone layer, live in no doubt that around every corner, is a threat just waiting to leap upon you. Our various world governments, in a break from the usual tradition, do appear to be concentrating their efforts to mitigating many of the risks. There is, however, one threat that appears to be largely ignored. One that lingers right before us. And about six feet down. Zombies. Step One: Stock up on supplies Equipment: Fourteen months worth of canned goods ( approx. $4,000 - $6,000), bottled water (approx. $900.00) Optional: Lobster ($80.00 – Kailis) You are what you eat. Especially when you’re a zombie. Your very first priority when planning for the zombie apocalypse is food. As delicious as Heinz Sphagetti O’s undoubtedly are, eight months of the same thing can get tiring – so be sure to stock up an a variety of canned goods for both the sake of your nutrition and your sanity. Step Two: Build a moat Equipment: Shovel ($14.00 - Bunnings) Optional: Piranhas (Twenty of Britains finest – South America) Zombies cannot swim. They lack the vital brain capacity and inflatable yellow arm floaties to accomplish what we metabolically unchallenged can. Take advantage of this floaty deficiency by spending a few weeks mapping out your latest water feature. Ensure all proper paperwork is lodged with the relevant council authorities. Furthermore, with the simple addition of just a few schools of Pygocentrus nattereri, or the red-bellied piranha, you will ensure yourself a near constant supply of Undead fattened fish to supplement your exciting Sphagetti O diet.

Let me make something very clear: Guns are dangerous. And it’s your job to make them dangerous to zombies. Note that you should only ever use your weapons as a last and final resort -only after all other fortifications and security measures have failed should you consider pulling the trigger. Or if boredom compels you to begin picking off your less favourite neighbours from your rooftop. Ensure these weapons are kept within easy reach of your person at all times – if necessary, plant multiple versions of your selected weapons about your home and person. Step Six: Plan for the re-establishment of the human race Equipment: Willing member of opposite gender Optional: Chloroform Humanity. Cut down in the prime of its existence. It is now up to you to rebuild and repopulate the glory that was once mankind. Often, the lucky selected person will be unwilling to enter your new fortress. Be sure to explain to them dangers of venturing outside, and the very real possibility of death should they try. Under no circumstances should force be used. After all, you will both be spending a great deal of time together in the future. If you have followed all of the above steps, congratulations! You are now ready for the zombie apocalypse. Or the Hostage Situation Squad. Whichever comes first. Words by Rehana Badat Image by Jason Dirstein

Step Three: Construct self-containing Hydroponic farm Equipment: Indoor hydroponics kit (approx. $2,000.00 – Hydromasta.com) Optional: Bob Marley Poster ($5.00 - Ebay) Sadly, the impending zombie apocalypse will mean an end to a lot of the food we take for granted. However, this doesn’t mean we can’t occasionally enjoy a seasonal fruit or vegetable at the expense of a little space! A Hydroponic farm is the perfect way to grow your own healthy food alternatives, and, if you’re particularly handy when it comes to carrots, your own organic ammo. Be sure to only tend to your new garden in the dead of the night – so as not to arouse the suspicions of your neighbours. After all, the level of residual information stored within a zombies mind from it’s living existence remains unknown, and the last thing you want is a zombie with full knowledge of how well fed and nutrient rich your brain is! Allay suspicions with the installation of the Bob Marley poster in a prominent place. Point potential snoops to the Meth lab across the road. Step Five: Arm yourself Equipment: Maverick mod# 88 pump shotgun short barrel ($155.00 - Gunsamerica.com) , pick Axe ($35.00 - Bunnings), baseball bat ($25.00 – Rebel Sport), police Commissioned Glock ($80.00 - Black Market), ammo (Price varies by quantity and type) Optional: Grenades

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At one time or another during our lifetime, we are likely to venture out into the big wide world. The downside of this is, in the big wide world your pay-cheque doesn’t stretch quite as far. A sad reality, but a true one. So what do you do? You can find an abandoned house, shop or warehouse and squat but that’s not really conducive to studying. You can live out of your car, but again this would make things difficult. Or you can rent somewhere. The problem with renting nowadays is it’s expensive, VERY expensive! Only a decade ago you could rent a three bedroom, two bathroom house close to the CBD for $150 a week. In 2012 you will be struggling to find a room for the same price. Then there is the question of who to live with. Do you try and get some friends together, only to find your best mate snores like a train, or move in with strangers only to come home one day and find your housemates broke cousin “Jimmy” sleeping on your couch? Or take the gamble of leasing somewhere in the hopes you can find housemates to help reduce the impact on your bank balance? The answer is all three. The key to sharehouse success is to keep an open mind and follow your instincts. Having just recently been on the hunt for a new sharehouse, after the old one went sour, I feel I can offer some insight into the do and don’ts of searching, moving in and cohabiting. First of all you need to prioritise, what are you looking for? What facilities do you need to be comfortable? Who would you like to live with? And most importantly what is your budget? Budget can be a hard one, what may seem reasonable one month, will break the bank the next if an emergency comes up. Try to keep this in mind when you start looking, better to be conservative than deal with angry housemates when you can’t pay rent for a month. Next is location. Be realistic! You WILL NOT get an awesome house with one or two great housemates in Mount Lawley for $100 a week and if you do, you lucky bastard, do not stuff it up! Budget and location really do go hand in hand, the more desirable the suburb the more you will pay. Though also remember the more people in the house, the less you pay.

Which brings us to the question, how many people is too many? If you are happy to live in a three bedroom house with five people then go for it but remember the more people, the more clashes, concessions and arguments. We as humans are territorial beings and we need our own space in order to be happy. Once you have located a few properties, do a drive by first. No, I don’t mean open fire on a nice place to make it less appealing, I mean see if the photos match what you saw online. What’s the street like and are there shops close by? If the location and house meet your needs, ring the number provided. Often an SMS is more convenient but if you want to get in first you need to call. Remember this does give you a valuable opportunity to ask some questions, see if you click with them and suss them out. It sounds bad but security is always an issue, if possible take a friend with you when viewing properties, don’t carry all the rent and bond with you, let someone know where you are planning on going and most of all if you feel uncomfortable, get out of there. Once you are viewing the property, grill your potential housemates a bit. Find out if they work, what they like to do on the weekend, do they have a bf/gf. All of these questions will come across as general chit chat but you can analyse them and see if you’re moving in with a potential drug dealer or party animal. Lastly have a thorough look through the house, especially your potential room. Ask questions about who the rent is paid to, how long the lease is for, how bills are split (if they aren’t inclusive in the rent), would you all buy separate groceries or pool your money, any pest issues and the most important question, why is your housemate moving? To this question I have once received the answer ‘for giant cock’ to say I was shocked was an understatement but I was delighted at the same time, as I knew instantly we would get on. If you look at a place and there are small china dolls, with fake blood and burnt clothing in an outside laundry, you may want to give it a miss or the toilet overflows. Words by Miss Paige Wittingham Image by D’Arcy Ellis

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Every civilisation in the world has its own social or religious customs. America, as well as Canada, Liberia and Puerto Rico, celebrate Thanksgiving, a celebration of the first harvest of the year. The Chinese celebrate a ‘Lantern Festival’, which falls on the first full moon after the Spring Festival. They eat sweet dumplings during this festival, which symbolise reunion. As well as such customs, each civilisation has had its own myths or mythical monsters. The Loch Ness Monster resides at the bottom of Loch Ness in Scotland. The Ancient Greeks believed in a whole range of mythical beasts, like the centaur and the minotaur. It seems only fitting that Australians as a community have their own myths and customs, but the line between fact and fiction has blurred over time. What’s true? What isn’t? I thought I would clear a few things up. Drop Bears, Thylarctos plummetus – True Now, a lot of people will tell you that drop bears don’t actually exist – they’re wrong. These large, carnivorous, koala-esque marsupials make their home in the treetops and prey mostly on unsuspecting animals by dropping onto their heads. Like their herbivorous cousins the koala, drop bears live in eucalyptus trees, but don’t eat the leaves. Instead, the drop bear will lie in wait until a small animal crosses its path. You might think nothing of them now, but wait. While it’s true that drop bears normally don’t feed on humans, if one crosses its path, the drop bear won’t even hesitate. Drop bears wait until a human has arranged a nest for the night, in most cases a tent, and when the prey has fallen asleep, the creature will attack. Tents have been found slashed to pieces, the humans - vanished! These disappearances are often classified as ‘animal attacks’. However, there are ways to avoid a drop bear attack. For the fashion conscious bushwalker or camper, braiding forks into the hair will almost certainly deter this beast. Drop bears also hate the smell of vegemite, so if you really don’t give a shit about your personal image, or you’re just really bad at braiding your hair (I sympathise), smearing vegemite lightly on the back of the neck and behind the ears will make them avoid you like the plague. If you find yourself in the middle of nowhere without vegemite, I heard toothpaste also works, though not quite as well.

Australian children ride kangaroos to school – false Kangaroos average a speed of about 20-25 km/h at their comfortable speed, but can sustain a speed of 40 km/h for two kilometres. As the average school child will wake up ten minutes before class starts, and school is five kilometres away (any closer and the kids can walk), a kangaroo would be unable to get there on time. Instead, parents prefer to send their children off to school on the backs of emus, which can average a speed of 40 km/h, getting their children to school within the ten minutes with time to spare. Emus are also advantageous as you can fit more kids on their backs. While emus are also used for taxis, kangaroos are most used by the elderly at the supermarket and the mailman who delivers your letters. Which is why it takes so long for that iPhone case you ordered off eBay to get to your house. Crocodile Wrestling – A National Pastime To have completely immersed yourself in Australian culture, including riding the emu taxi and surviving a drop bear attack, you must also engage in the national pastime – crocodile wrestling, location – nearest river. This activity is a lot more frequent in the Northern Territory and at Australia Zoo, where the crocodile population is heavier than in the other parts of the country, but this game can be enjoyed anywhere. The person participating must be dressed in khaki shorts and a shirt, with steel cap boots and dark green socks. The umpire, dressed in a bintang singlet and shorts, will yell ‘match’, and the game begins. The aim of the game is simple – don’t get eaten by the crocodile. The battle ends when the crocodile is legs up underneath the participant, at which point the umpire yells ‘crikey!’ I only know this from watching the videos online – in the exact same way my mum tells me having a drink with dinner every now and then will make me an alcoholic, she thinks wrestling crocodiles every now and then will get me killed by crocodiles. Words by Ashley Swetman Image by Jason Dirstein

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Are you an extraterrestrial student? Have an assignment due about Earth? Need to dissect human specimens but don’t know where to find one? We from Intergalactic Student Advisors for Hideous Experiments (ISAHE) will introduce you to human habitats. Here we will list five recommended places where you can find human samples, so you can abduct one and poke their insides. Cities Due to the tendency for high populations, cities are perfect places to begin your search for an ideal specimen. Here you may find a high variety of human samples, from prime ministers to girls-next-door – a human term for female samples of the species that tend to rouse unholy desire in their male neighbours. Smaller cities are called towns. Many aliens throughout the galaxy prefer to abduct townsfolk – the term for those living in towns – because there are fewer witnesses to brainwash afterwards. After you abduct a human sample, it is polite to inform their family that you will rummage through his/her vital organs for a few days. According to human TVs, the conventional message should include ‘We have your child/husband/wife, and if you want to see him/her again, prepare $1,000,000’. It is important to respect others’ culture. Villages Although smaller than towns, it is not recommended to abduct human samples from villages, because villagers – the term for those living in villages – tend to know one another better than those in the aforementioned places. Any abduction can be easily detected and may cause unnecessary publication in local media. Nevertheless, there are special types of village called farms, where you can abduct a more valuable type of human called cows. Unlike the samples who inhabit cities and towns, cows walk on four feet and have a tail, which led most scientists to believe they were a different species altogether. However, a test on their brain contents proves that there is no distinctive difference between two-legged humans and cows, since both of them require equal amounts of food, sex, sleep, sex, social interactions, sex, sex and more sex. The only differences are their verbal capabilities – cows speak Moo, while two-legged speak Mootherfucker. Two-legged humans seem to enjoy chopping their cow equivalents and consuming them, therefore performing an act of cannibalism. This is why humans are considered mentally unstable by more intelligent beings throughout the galaxy and should be avoided whenever possible. Prisons Not much is known about prisons, except the fact that most humans do not seem to mind if you abduct a sample from this type of habitat. On the contrary, they seem grateful with the decrease of the prisoners – the term for those living in prisons – and never ask about them again. If you abduct samples from prisons, you do not need to leave a polite message to their families, and apparently you do not need to return them if you accidentally saw their heads off. This will save your time.

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Apparently, prisons are a kind of holiday resort for humans, where they can get free bedrooms, free access to gyms and free food. Humans living in prisons are not required to work twenty-four/seven like their city’ based counterparts, which raises a question why most of them remain sullen and melancholy. After probing a few prisoners’ organs, scientists theorise this is because humans are never satisfied with what they have. We believe it is true. Brothels Scientists throughout the galaxy have questioned the role of brothels in human culture. An interview with human samples have suggested that brothels are sacred places where most humans conduct their act of reproduction, although the question of how remains a mystery since humans cannot split themselves like amoeba and cannot lay eggs like platypuses. Nevertheless, it is clear that humans who live in brothels are happier than their prisoner counterparts, although the reason for this remains unanswered. If you require a happy human specimen, you may put brothels on the top priority. Graveyards Similar to brothels, human samples who live in graveyards have a tendency toward happiness. Those who live in this type of habitat are always grinning, which implies happiness, despite their lack of skin and tissues and vital organs. If you study humans inner-skeleton, graveyards are perfect places to collect your samples. After you finish with your hideous experiments, we recommend you return the abducted human samples to where they belong, preferably with their heads still attached, to avoid suspicion from non-governmental human bodies. We wish you the best for your assignment and we hope you do not have too much trouble reattaching your sample’s head. Sellotape is available in the bookshop. Words by Mr Insult Image by Ali Ghalib Al Ogaily


The definition of ‘home’ differs from person to person. This is because everyone is different and so the places in which they feel most comfortable and safe will depend on their individual values and attitudes. The most common definition of a ‘home’ is somewhere you belong. This means that a house is not necessarily a home if an individual doesn’t feel a sense of belonging. With the rise of technology these recent years, we’re relying on electronics and the internet far more than ever before. It’s not hard to see that Apple has been booming with many people around the world owning MacBooks, iPhones, iPods and iPads. These spectacular gadgets have been making it increasingly easier to spend time alone with one’s self and their device. I’ve seen many people at parties these days, phone in hand busy typing away, rather than socialising with the groups of people around them. To be honest, I’m also one of those people. No, I may be worse. I’d rather stay at home and play on the internet. There are some digital communities that make me feel accepted due to the number of people that share the same interests as me in the same community. These are just some of the communities that I’ve come to call home: Facebook Whenever a funny, sad or annoying event happens in my life, I can’t help but post a status about it. It just feels really great knowing that there are people out there who can relate. For instance, I recently posted a status about Justin Bieber hating anime (which I love), and instantly there were comments made by my anime-loving friends saying “Respect for him just went down!” and “How can you not like Dragon Ball Z? Everyone loves DBZ!” At times I’d post statuses about family problems or love issues, and friends would ‘like’ and comment “I know how you feel, love. Hang in there” or message me words of advice. It’s comforting knowing that someone cares, and is willing to put aside their problems for a minute to listen to yours. For me, Facebook is a community of friends who say their own opinions and hope to discover that there are others who share the same view. I feel more than comfortable to post whatever is on my mind, and have confidence knowing that I will not get judged for it.

Tumblr Tumblr is absolutely amazing. If I could marry Tumblr and have lovely children, I freakin’ would. Tumblr is a blog site where you write posts, share music, images and videos or ‘reblog’ the posts of others and add them to your own page. You can practically make your blog whatever the hell you want. Some people have set themes, whilst others just post and reblog whatever they find is cool. Naming a few popular things people reblog: quotes (about life and love mainly), fashion, art, cute couples, sex, game screenshots, and funny pictures. My Tumblr blog’s set theme is black & white images and inspirational lifelove quotes. I love how everyone comes together during the tough moments in life. I remember there was a picture of a bald girl, and the caption wrote “This is my little sister. She has been undergoing cancer treatments to get better, reblog this picture to show her she’s got support and isn’t alone.” It got nearly a million reblogs at the time I reblogged it, so by now it must’ve exceeded that number. On Tumblr, people embrace the weirdness in everyone; all the social rejects are welcomed rather than ridiculed. Sims This one may or may not be relatable for others, but I enjoy making ideal families and friends on my Sims. I create a replica of my own family and that of others on my Sims neighbourhood, and control them in the way that I would like them to act in reality. For instance, my dad is always working and only comes to see his children once every month or so, but in my Sims game he loves his children and plays with them often. It’s a fantasy world for me; it’s also a stress reliever. I just simulate my life the way I’d like it to be, and I feel a whole lot better. Putting the sentimental reasons aside, it’s also fun to experiment with house designs (it makes you feel like an architect). Everybody has their own definition of ‘home’ and some may be common whilst others unique. It depends on a person’s experience in life. Two children growing up in a house filled with abusive family members may develop into completely different adults. It’s all about your values and attitudes; they determine how your life turns out and what your description of a ‘home’ truly is. Words by Mimi Rukmarata Images by Jacky Le

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Dude, Where’s My Flying Car? Technology has shaped the world in ways we could never have imagined; from the all-knowing internets to the apple empire, we have become a society that relies on and relishes in technology. As of yet we have no hover boards, nor personal jetpacks, but there are still some crazy gadgets out now that seemed to have come back from the future. Here are our picks of some futuristic tech to keep an eye out for:

Fighting Robots: Much like the movie Real Steel, there are currently robots built solely for the fun of fighting. Simply strap the fighter into a harness and they can remotely bludgeon their opponent’s battle bot. The winner of Japan’s ROBO-ONE fighting competition Naoki Maru is even working to incorporate motion sensors, like the Xbox Kinect; so you may find yourself betting on a boxing mech match in the near future.

TVs – Two Points of View, One screen As you may already know, 3D technology works by presenting two image on slightly different angles. The lenses of 3D glasses act to separate the images and create the illusion of depth; one image for the left eye, the other for the right. Some developers are turning this mechanic around and making it so that a TV can show two television screens in one so that two different people can see different things simultaneously, depending on what glasses they are wearing.

Helpful Robots: There’s nothing like a machine to put a person out of work, but sometimes there just aren’t enough humans for the job. In order to care for an aging population, Japan is putting a huge amount of funding into robot assistance to care for the elderly. From heavy-lifting helpers getting people from their beds, to tiny talking assistants keeping the brain busy; there are robots in development for just about everything. It may be a while before the Western world embraces android assistants, but the technology is out there.

The technology is currently aimed at allowing two-player full screen video games, but imagine that you’re watching TV when your parent/ housemate/partner comes in to watch their show; all you’d need to do is make the TV play both at the same time and simply throw on your 3D glasses. Or perhaps in the not-so-distant future moviegoers will all see slightly different versions of a movie; some scenes included, some characters missed, some commentary altered.

Autonomous Cars Our future may not hold flying cars and traffic jams high in the sky, but it will certainly contain vehicles capable of driving around by themselves. The basis of driverless technology is that a car is fitted with sensors which allow it to build a 3D model of the surrounding environment. This 3D model is then linked up with a GPS or google maps, allowing the vehicle to deftly avoid objects and adhere to the road rules. Self-driving cars may seem like a scary far-off concept, but these independent vehicles are already driving themselves across America free of human meddling. In fact the US state of Nevada has recently legalised driverless cars, albeit with the human fleetmanager held responsible for any trouble caused. It won’t be long before these clever cars are careening around corners only to pause politely at the round-about, awaiting their turn. Robots A list of upcoming awesome robots is really a full length article in itself, so we’ll just give you some of the interesting androids that exist right now.

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Realistic Robots There are many images that come to mind when you think of robots, but perhaps the scariest are those that look, move and act just like living things. Some of

the latest mechanoids to spring to life include; Saya the human-looking robot who works in reception at Tokyo University; BigDog, a four-legged bot that runs and bounds across all types of terrain just like man’s best friend; and Asimo who has the poise and skill to walk and dance. A few years ago there was even a robot developed to feel love. Dubbed Kenji, the experimental android was successfully taught to feel affection, although perhaps a little too well. An unintended consequence of his training was that he developed ‘love’ for his female technician; to the point where he tried to block the exit so she could not leave and hugged her repeatedly. The assistant was eventually able to contact senior staff at the facility to deactivate him so she could leave. It looks like the future is here my friends! Is it everything we hoped for or a scary, scary place? Words by Jess “Ninja” Watson Image by Jason Dirstein


: Hang on, he has a sister? By this stage you are being shuffled into the house. You lean in for a hug and then lean straight back out when you realise that your kind gesture is not being reciprocated. Awkward. You look around for a common talking point. You scour the room like Sherlock Holmes in order to find just a skerrick of information to lead you towards a conversation starter. Nothing.

Meeting your partner’s parents for the first time is a big deal, a HUGE deal! It is about taking that next step in a relationship and trying to solidify your place in your partner’s life. Scary. Your partner has a close family and an extended family and friends and best friends and workmates and a whole social circle of people that you don’t know. Think about how many people that is…and then think about the odds of whether or not you will get along with them all. It’s scary. And worse still— these people are going to be judging you like cra-zy! Are you good enough for Daddy’s little girl? You might have to shake hands with the father and look him right in the eye (and by the way—in that moment, he will know that you are penetrating his little girl). The younger brother might be wondering if you are as attractive as the last one he brought home. The best mate might speculate as to whether you make more or less money than their besties previous partner. Basically, if you really like this guy/girl then you need the approval of your partner’s close social circle…and it is not always easy to get. Here is a taste of what it might be like for you: You have been going out with this guy for about three months when he decides that it is ‘time’. You pull on your most appropriate outfit; the white shirt with the demure neckline and the modest skirt that almost covers your knees. You practiced not dropping the ‘F-bomb’ all fucking day in preparation for the grand event. You paint on the fake smile that often accompanies falseness (and which, by the way, you absolutely abhor). You ask if there are any taboo subjects as you walk up to the door, to which he replies “Don’t ask about my sister”. Righto, got it.

What kind of people have no cheesy photos of random children around the house? What kind of people have no... stuff. No ornaments, no art—nothing but a solitary cross hanging in the kitchen. “So, you like Jesus, eh?” just doesn’t seem like a great start to dinner conversation. You keep quiet and leave it to your partner to do the talking... which he doesn’t do. Just smile and nod. The mother starts dishing up a lovely roast meal and you get served on what she calls a ‘lady-sized’ plate. What. The. Fuck. You want to scream at her; “Hey ‘lady’, I don’t suppose you noticed that it is 2012 and that I am 5’11 and solidly built?” Before you can tell her what to do with her ‘lady-sized’ plate she is reaching for your hand and bowing her head to say grace. Er...double awkward. You bow your head and half close your eyes. You sneak a peek at the wrinkly face of your future mother in law carefully choosing her words. You look down at your plate of golden roast potatoes smothered in gravy and wish that you had a tongue like Gene Simmons from Kiss so that you could lick the peppery brown substance without anyone noticing. Eyes are raised and forks hit plates. You painstakingly battle your way through an hour of completely mundane conversation. You eat your plateful and want to ask for seconds but don’t dare ruin the illusion that you are ladylike. You manage to not swear and don’t make the mistake of leaning in for a cuddle on the way out. They wave at the door and say that they hope to see you again soon. Not fucking likely. You see, you have had an epiphany. Boredom appears to be genetic and you realise that there is no hope for your boyfriend. This dinner has made you realise that you never really liked him anyway...but the thought of spending Birthdays, Easter and Christmas with these knob-jockeys for the next five or so decades is enough to make you hastily retreat...never to be seen again. Words by Asten Nunn Image by Evonne Lai

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Name: Brenda Hamlett Teach: Primary Maths Faculty: School of Education How do you make your office feel more like home? Everything I need is here because I live in a flat so I stay here to around 8pm some nights. What do you like most/least? Desk is in the wrong spot; I like to be facing my door so I can see people come in.

Name: Baz Harvey Faculty: Media Loans Department How do you make your office feel more like home? Posters and signs over the wall. What do you like most/least? It’s a good size office and the staff members I work with are really nice and easy to get along with.

Name: Duncan Barnes Teach: Photo media Faculty: Education and Arts How do you make your office feel more like home? The lighting, I prefer to use lamps instead of the ceiling lights. Having pictures from overseas trips and memorable photos. What do you like most/least? My office needs a makeover.

Name: Tom Reynolds Occupation: Editor for GSM Faculty: The Guild - GSM How do you make your office feel more like home? Posters, pictures over the wall, music and bringing in cupcakes for visitors. What do you like most/least? You’re not taking my photo, are you?

Name: Dr Glen Spoors Teach: Game design and culture Faculty: Education and Arts How do you make your office feel more like home? I don’t make it too much like home. I base my office around what I teach so cartoon posters and figurines. What do you like most/least? Not enough wooden furniture.

Name: Dr Marianne Knaus Teach: Early Childhood Studies Faculty: School of Education How do you make your office feel more like home? I like the view through the windows, fresh air and it’s a nice size office.

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For many people, it is clear-cut where their real home is. To be exact, which country they are really from. “I am English”, “I am a Norwegian”, or “I am from my country, Vietnam”. It is so easy for these people. Personally, it hasn’t been that clearcut for me to really declare and even convince people where my real “home” is. I can be classified as Chinese who was born and bred in Indonesia. Actually, I consider myself to be 100% Indonesian as I am not even a son of immigrants, and also perhaps because of the fact that I am not a good Chinese speaker. My parents were born in Indonesia, ditto for at least some of my grandparents. Therefore, I could be considered a third generation migrant (I am actually unsure if my grandparents circumstances could be considered as migrating, but to explain that here would require another article). There is no denying that I look 100% Chinese though. I have never had it hard back home in Indonesia as I consider myself to be Indonesian, even in the notorious New Order era, when many Chinese migrants were persecuted. I didn’t really get racist incidents/problems over there. However, the real problem stared when I went abroad to study, which in this case, was when I arrived in Australia. It’s been really great meeting people from every single continent. However, things always get awkward when talking about my home country. People are, and will always assume me as a bad English speaking Chinese national from Mainland China. Even if I give people five guesses on where I am from, people will use three of those for China (without fail... Sometimes I wonder why they don’t choose Japan or Korea instead), Hong Kong, and Macau. This is awkward as three guesses, and we are still not out of China yet. Then, they usually give me that give-up look on their faces and use their remaining two guesses to throw half-hearted wild guesses such as Singapore, Malaysia, and Vietnam. It is incredible how because of my looks, nobody would have guessed I am actually from Indonesia.

It doesn’t end there. I have met some Caucasians, either locals or from Europe, who are genuinely shocked when I tell them I am an Indonesian. I’ve got things like, “OMG! You are so Chinese! You can’t be serious!” or even “Indonesian??? Aren’t you supposed to be, erm, darker or something?” While I have to understand that these people might not know Indonesia that well and even if they have visited the country, Bali is the only place that they have ever been and not for a prolonged period of time. However, those statements and incidences are enough to make me face-palm myself. Actually, this makes me really sad. Where is home for me? Indonesia is my home, and I love the country. That’s where my home is. But to some people, China will always be my home. To them, I am a pure Chinese and any other statements will genuinely shock them. They just can’t accept it. However, I am not Chinese. If I go to China, I will need to apply for a Chinese VISA to visit the country. Interestingly enough, and not surprisingly, I will still be considered as a foreigner whilst I am there. What always irks me is when people do accept that I am an Indonesian, but still insist on making statements like “yea but you are a Chinese nevertheless, man!” It is so sad that physical appearance has played a huge role in detaching myself from my beloved home country. As a so-called “Chinese-Indonesian”, I am really longing for the privilege to say: “I am an Indonesian, and Indonesia is my home” without getting weird and genuinely bewildered looks, especially from Westerners. From this experience, I couldn’t help but wonder: if someone like me, whose family has been entrenched in a country so long that they might as well be an indigenous, then it must be much more difficult for people who are only a second generation immigrant such as my idol Ibrahimovic and some of my friends that I personally know to confidently state where their home is without being unnecessarily interrogated. Words & Image by Alvin Foeng

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Times can be hard. Finding somewhere to live in these hard times can be a challenge. With the Daleks in cahoots with Team Rocket, homes are now becoming a commodity that is even more valued than a set of Mickey Mouse ears. But here at GSM, we have thought of some places that you can move into when the times are getting tough. Ikea Let’s face it, the meatballs are cheap and decent, but have you ever thought about living here fulltime? You can choose from dozens of bedrooms in styles going back to the ‘60s, and kitted out with books and TVs so you’ll never go bored! If you ever get hungry, you can just pop over to the cafeteria for a delightful range of snacks that you can feast on. The toys in the Kids Section should be enough to keep you and all your guests entertained for hours, and the lighting area can be used for studying. But if you get really bored (or security has finally cottoned on and are after you), the number of wardrobes in the building means that at least one portal to Narnia should be within walking distance. If need be, start charging admission for the kids at a lower rate than the child care at the front, and in no time at all, things should start to look up. ECU Mount Lawley Campus We spend so much time here, why not just move in? I’m not talking about the village (that requires money, and we’re being as cheap as we can be), but migrating between the eLabs, Library, and faculty buildings. There’s a range of vending machines, books, and computers (with ready access to YouTube) to keep yourself entertained throughout the day, and at night you can snuggle under your books on a couch in the eLabs and never get found out. The best part is that when your friends ask you where you’ve been for the last few weeks, you can tell them that you’ve spent most of your time behind your books and the computer at campus – think of how much they’ll admire you for it!

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The Cinema With a large variety of (mostly) comfortable seating, depending on which cinema you choose to relocate to, and free entertainment as well; wouldn’t it be the perfect place to live? In addition to having many guests at all hours of the day and night, and having to move between your ‘rooms’ as the day and night progress so as to remain unnoticed, it could get annoying. But you’ll never have to pay for a movie ticket again, and you could get a job with the local paper writing film reviews from the first night and getting that all-important scoop. Claremont Showgrounds You’d probably want to move out in the September school holidays so that you’d get some good sleep at night, but think of all the places to stay here! Aside from the barb wire fence, you can just walk in anytime. Set in safer parts of the city, with public transit very close, this residence would get you great company and visitors when it comes to Soundwave or Supernova time every year. Alternatively (if you can get down there easily enough), Adventure World could be another place to take up residence. Aside from having a pool and other amusements to entertain you, there are a few cafes around to eat from. TARDIS If you can find one of these, go for it but don’t expect to be back in time for fish fingers and custard tonight. The Beach This could be a good idea in the summer months, but at night (regardless of the time of the year) it can get really cold. The advantages here include (a) not having a security force you’d have to watch out for, and (b) PARTY!!!! Let’s face it, these are good places that you could live in if you were homeless. From visits to the eLab at night, I daresay that many students are trying the ECU method. Personally, I’ll be keeping an eye out for a TARDIS... Words by Rafeif Ismail & Delshard Mozhdehinia Image by Manuel Mendoza


Over the past few months I have been reflecting on a collection of questions, all of which circle around the one term ‘Home’. What is it about a particular city that makes us feel at home? How do we ever know we are at home? Can we have more than one home city, while never losing that original feeling from the first? Last semester, I spent three incredible months living in an ancient Chinese city called Xi’an, while on a study program with ECU. When it came to leave, it was with mixed emotions that I said goodbye. I felt as though I was tearing a piece of myself away, like a baby being taken away from its mother for the first time. I have always loved Australia and so I never thought calling another country ‘home’ would come so easy, this was before I fell in love with Xi’an. Xi’an is like an eccentric grandmother. She is filled with enough character and history to keep you in awe and guessing with fascination at every turn. The ancient history resonates from all her buildings. With her wide arms stretched around the city center, we trust we are safe and find comfort in her embrace, I know she is there to watch over us and offer use her protection and sanctuary. She’s an early riser and at times a partygoer. She’s the heart of China, the mother hen of the country. She possesses a charm and a beauty that is difficult to express. From the postcard wonder of the countryside to the dazzle and sparkle of the many bright LED lights, her beauty abounds and captivates. Every visitor of this city would understand my sentiments when I say, ‘Xi’an is a home away from home.’ The people of Xi’an are always happy and willing to welcome us into their lives, allowing us to ‘connect’ with their world and create our own family away from home. However, when do we know that we are truly home? Is it a sign above the door saying ‘Home Sweet Home’ or is it the smell of your mother’s cooking?

We can search the whole world and never find another place like home. For some fortunate few they feel at home wherever they may travel. For others, they feel content in staying in their hometown where they were born and raised, and rarely feel the compulsion to venture outside their city limits. They don’t feel the need to question, what could be? For me, I come to the conclusion that home is just a state of mind. When needed we can adapt and change to a place, wherever it may be in the world thus creating the feeling of ‘home’. So, when does this switch in our brain flick over to saying we are home? Do we need to purchase symbolic homely items for this feeling to start or do we need to memorize all the surrounding street names to feel it? Most people appreciate their home as no more than a four-cornered space where one lingers. This accurately describes a house but not a home. A home is defined as a place in which one’s domestic affections are centered. Now, it seems our centered affections are the only difference between a home and a house. Creating a home comes with pride, respect, and love. If we treat our city the same way, we are sure to call it our home. Treat your city with affection and pride and it will repay you in kind. It will accept, protect and provide the base for growth, emotive, physical and spiritual. To have a home is to be content with life, to love others, and to be loved in return. For me, this is Xi’an. Like many corny hallmark cards have said before us, ‘the home is where the heart is’. Your home is your retreat; a place of sanctuary, solace and peace. Everyone in the world should undergo the journey to turn their humble abode into a home and fill it with the elements of their centered affection. Should this be done, the world would have a better sense of belonging in a community. Words by Rebecca Sherriffs Image by Wenjie Zheng

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Hate! Hate! Hate! Some might call me unpatriotic and un-Australian for not giving unadulterated praise to Australia, but none-the-less if there is no merit in harsh critique then my ramblings can simply be passed off as the ‘talk of a crazy man’. But is Australia the perfect country, free of negative attributes?

“This is a one way street to insanity...all it does is try to normalize something that by definition is not normal ie the norm...Neighbours should be ashamed of themselves as setting a poor example to the young ones watching the show. Disgraceful. Australian television has hit a new low.”

I’m not overtly patriotic, and at times struggle with my identity as Australian. Not because of my race, gender, age, sexuality, religious beliefs etc. etc., but rather my disgust of the hate that I see present in society. Whenever I’m feeling okay about the state of the country, someone, somewhere, says something that brings me back down. The following is a overview of some of the issues, and how they are at times treated in Australia, which genuinely disturbs me.

“It’s not winning praise from me either. This deviant stuff’s being rammed down our throats so little kids will grow up thinking gay marriage is completely normal. Yuk.”

Aboriginals “We should just put them all in a town and nuke them” - Family Friend If this tactic sounds somewhat similar, that’s probably because it is. The tactic is called genocide, and Hitler popularised it during World War Two. A lot of people refer to Hitler when talking about history and politics, to the point where I think he’s somewhat an overused villain pop-star [Ed: Godwin’s Law]. In this case, however, I see no difference. Issues which are commonly associated with Aboriginals include rates of alcoholism, average life span, level of education, levels of employment, etc. etc. I’m not going to comment on these, but assuming the very worst I still think that exterminating anyone with biological Aboriginal links is a little too far... Refugees “Turning the boats around isn’t too far, we should be using them for target practice” - School Friend “How dare someone try to make Australia their home via boat!” says the white man. Irony much? I’m not an expert, but slaughtering individuals claiming asylum probably goes against the Refugee Convention, and can even be interpreted to be inhumane. Bet you didn’t see that coming! Sexuality First four comments on a Perthnow.com article titled ‘Neighbours wins praise from viewers for first male gay kiss in the history of the show’: “Winning praise from many viewers!!? How many viewers? Not me I reckon that is gross and perverted. Yuk!!!”

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“Shame Shame......wrong on so many levels.” One male homosexual kiss in a TV series that’s been running for 27 years. God forbid children don’t adopt their parent’s hatred and discrimination, that would just be unacceptable. Muslims “Australians used to mock Aboriginal spirituality and religion. If you did that to a Muslim, they’d probably blow you up” - Fellow ECU Student Now I don’t think that the person who said this was actively attacking Muslims, and it came about as a ‘slip of the tongue’ sort of a comment. I highly doubt she hates Muslims and thinks that they all plan on blowing things up, but I do think that it represents that Australia is uneasy of Muslims. The most obvious reason is 9/11 and associating terrorism with Muslims. If we look at the Australian case, however, there have been no terror attacks. None. In the early 2000s Jack Roche tried to establish a small terrorist group in Australia. When interviewed about this by police, however, he responded with “nobody in Australia was interested at all”. Gosh, not all Muslims are terrorists after all! So, yeah... I’m aware that my judging of other people who judge people could be interpreted as hypocritical, or that I’m claiming to be some sort of moral superior. In the end, though, I’m just upset with the hatred and aggression which I see in society; which surfaces on issues concerning Aboriginals, refugees, sexuality, and Muslims. For a supposedly advanced community, I see a lot of what I perceive as backwardness everyday. It is this hatred and aggression which I’ve come to associate with Australia, and as such would rather not denote myself as an Australian to those who ask where I’m from. Maybe I’ll just say Sweden or Canada. Words by Comrade Larry Fife Image by Liam Lucas


You know all about Earth right? The amazing world we live in and are currently destroying? Humans live in a (possibly) infinite universe; a tiny speck on the edge of a galaxy, There are a minimum number of inhabitable planets elsewhere (not that we’d be able to get there with our current level of technology), I have been given the task of finding humanity’s new perfect home (My mother always said I would do something great for the human race!) We live on a planet that is 12,756.1 km in diameter and orbits the Sun at a speed of 107,200 km/h. There are tears in the ozone layer, particularly over Australia and Antarctica. Also, the rainforest that once covered 14% of the planet now covers only 6% and that could all be gone in the next 40 years. There is a war on every continent with the exception of Australia (because we are so far away) and Antarctica (not that people actually remember it to be a continent!). When you look at it that way, then its totally understandable that you’d want a new planet to live on. Can’t decide on which one? Step into my TARDIS and let me show you the universe our first stop is… Krypton The home of Superman, this Earth-like world orbits a red sun and is larger then Earth which means that there is room for everybody. Krypton is a lot older than Earth too which means whatever we do won’t make that much difference because it’s already been done by the advanced civilization currently inhabiting it. You may even get super powers while living there! If Kryptonians get powers from Earth’s yellow sun then humans should logically get superpowers from Krypton’s red sun (either that or they die a horribly painful death due to exposure). Unfortunately there is a time limit to living on this planet because it will eventually explode, destroying all of its inhabitants.

Gallifrey This planet orbits around two suns and is known as the ‘shining world’. It is the home of the Time Lords, so if you do decide to live here then you’ll be surrounded by advance technology and natural beauty. Gallifrey is filled with red grass and sliver trees. This world is remarkably different from Earth so before moving in you must take into account that the Time Lords are at war with the Daleks. As a result of this The Doctor will trap Gallifrey into a time lock forever but hey, look on the bright side, at least you will get to see a real life TARDIS, and maybe even spend some time at the Time Lord academy before your ultimate destruction. Vulcan Located a little over sixteen light years from Earth, Vulcan is a planet with higher gravity and a thinner atmosphere then earth. It’s a harsh planet with vast deserts and towering mountains. Living there would be like going on vacation in a country such as Dubai or Egypt, where once you get used to the higher temperatures it can be quite nice. Not many humans have lived on Vulcan, with the exception of Amanda Grayson (Spock’s mum). There are temples, ancient ruins, and active volcanoes and you must watch out for the sand storms! Living on Vulcan would be like living on a cooler version of Mars. You may have to convince the locals to share first. So none of these planets appeal to you? Well I have one last world to show you… This planet orbits around a star, which is 26,000 light years from the galaxy’s core and is the fifth largest and densest planet in its solar system. It’s located in its star systems habitable zone. It contains a perfect mixture of different climates and environments as well as a large and diverse biosphere, which includes 8.7 million species of planets and animals (90% of which have yet to be discovered). This blue and green planet looks as beautiful on the surface as it does from space. It’s been known many by names: Sol -3, Gaia and Terra to name a few. I think now of it as home. Our Earth, let’s look after it. Words by Rafeif Ismail

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Down & Out in Fremantle I get a lot of people from North of the river asking me what there is to do in Fremantle. Sure, you could go to the beach. You could grab a coffee at Gino’s. On A Thursday night, there is some mean jazz at X-Wray. But if you want a memorable Freo experience, and want to know the town for what it truly is, then I suggest you talk to the homeless. Being a hunter of mad conversation from a young age, I began talking to Freo’s Steinbeckian drop-outs when I was 13. I am yet to have a boring conversation. This is my brief guide to engaging with Freo’s homeless (can’t speak for Joondalup’s homeless), where to find them, what to say, and how to listen. Where to look Most of Freo’s homeless sit in parks; mainly near The Film and Television Institute and across from the train station. If you go down to South Beach at night you will find a shifting shanty town of characters. But the best hobos are ramblers, and will drift in and out of town. These guys come to you. Sit in a bar (outside) and wait. What to say Just ask questions. Never contradict or criticise. Most of these guys are quite sensitive and (as I’ve learnt) come from a violent world where a punch in the mouth is a valid answer to a question. How to listen You are going to have to learn to embrace long and awkward silences that are held together by the pulsing threat of physical violence. Be accepting, be calm, and make sure you can fake a laugh. But if someone tells you that they are Bruce Lee reincarnated (as Brother Ryan told me), then agree, and let them continue. Remember: even if you saw your father slain by a Sperm whale, your life is not as richly dark and fascinating as theirs. Be patient. You are going to hear some intense/sad stuff. The levels of Hobo Intensity For beginners there are the downtrodden people like a guy named Alistair. Guys like this have fallen on hard times. They tend to be very friendly, brotherly, and have their wits about them. Alistair himself is very intelligent and will debate Kafka with you one minute, and Carlton Draught the next. For the Intermediate there are the deluded people like Spoonz and The Archangel: These are the ‘mad’ homeless. Spoonz sits on the ground and bangs a pair of spoons while singing out of time. He rambles, is happy one second and crying the next, but enjoys conversation nonetheless. The Archangel looks like Walt Whitman, has a thundering singing voice, and plays guitar like Son House. He also believes he is an archangel sent down to save our souls. He is a lovely chap. These guys, though usually living in a fantasy world, are harmless and speak in fluent poetry. Enjoy. The most difficult level of hobo intensity to deal with is the deranged like Brother Ryan. I love Brother Ryan but he is terrifying. He has three machete scars across his chest from where he was attacked by the bikies who he used to ride with. His life is an avalanche of horrific tales. He thinks he is ‘The World’s Greatest Warrior’ and will occasionally seize your hand, crush it, while gazing intensely into your eyes. Do not be frightened, he is simply “transferring his power”. Ryan is a great storyteller, but violence lurks just under the surface. He is unpredictable. One helluva ride, but do not go in if you can’t make a drunken bipolar man with a history of abuse smile. Also, buy him beers. Now go out! You will learn more about life from these guys than you ever will at University. Words by Patrick Marlborough Iamge by Jacky Le

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Arts

WAAPA in the Park WAAPA 3.5 / 5

The Deep Spare Parts Puppet Theatre 3/5

Earthly Delights Bivouac Canteen and Bar 2.5 / 5

WAAPA in the Park is an event that takes place in Ron Stone Park, Mount Lawley, through a collaboration of WAAPA and the City of Stirling. The ensembles in the first half were mainly jazz, performed by the Big Band from WAAPA, and the second half were some funky tunes that has us tapping our feet and dancing about.

Based on Tim Winton’s book with the same title, The Deep is a puppet show that can be enjoyed by children and adults alike. There are only four performers onstage, with Katya Shevtsov as Alice, but the four of them are enough to colour the show. The setting is simple yet efficient: blue curtains in the middle of the stage to signify The Deep and a long set of yellow pillows as the beach.

Apparently, we at GSM use the ‘art gallery’ term very loosely. Obviously, Bivouac Canteen and Bar is a restaurant, but I was hoping that the art on display would be accessible without having to order a meal or disturb paying customers. Unfortunately, this was not the case as there was a barrier of tables and chairs between myself and the art work at all times. In a setup like this, it is secondary to the restaurant and basically decoration that one may notice if they are so inclined.

The Big Band from WAAPA was big in every aspect: the instruments ranged from a piano to and trombones all the way through to flutes and accompanied by a lovely vocalist. The eighteen well-dressed performers very clearly involved in what they were doing. The performances overall were very nice; WAAPA performers have a very high standard and if you are a jazz enthusiast, this performance will not disappoint you. Classics from the repertoire of the likes of Duke Ellington and Louis Armstrong will ensure that you have a good time while the vocal singer’s soothing, soft voice transports you to another world. The crowds reactions were positive and for me, it was a really nice chilled out session. The band had their own rendition of Britney Spears’ ‘Circus’. One of the singers made a decent interpretation of Whitney Houston’s ‘I Have Nothing’ and they gave it an amazing finish with Beyonce’s ‘Crazy in Love’. A thumbs-up to the arts and stage management students who did a good job of making sure everything ran smoothly. All in all, it was a pleasant evening. I am totes impressed. Words by Divya Jankee

I’m impressed with the creative use of the props – in one scene the yellow pillows are made into a pile to suggest Alice building a sandcastle, and in the other scene the pillows, now rather blue under the lighting, cover Alice tightly to suggest her drowning. Yet, I’m not very happy with the lighting. There are only two colours – blue to represent The Deep, and yellow, the beach – but they don’t change despite the mood of the scene onstage. Maybe they could try different shades of blue and yellow to suggest a change in the mood, like darker yellow when Alice lamenting her fear. It might work better that way. Since this is a puppet show, there’s a number of puppets decorating the performance, including the dog, the dolphins, the octopus (which I mistook as an alien) and Alice’s family. My personal favourite is the father puppet: it only has a round belly and limbs, and requires the performer to stick his head in as the father’s face. It’s a pity, though, not all the characters are puppets. Overall, The Deep is a delightful show that I’d recommend to everyone, especially to those who have children or younger siblings or cousins. Fremantle might be quite far from the City, but this show’s really worth it. Words by Aldy Hendradjaja

So now to review an exhibition I couldn’t get close enough to truly appreciate. Earthly Delights is an exhibition by local artist Miles Noel ending on the 17th of March. The body of work is comprised of a series of portraits. While the subject remains somewhat realistic, the backgrounds/landscapes are largely abstract in nature. The brushwork is rather fluid and loose for these sections which are a nice contrast from the portrait elements. As I am particularly fond of portraiture I thought I’d really have enjoyed this exhibition. But I hate the venue. I must admit though, that I went to Bivouac to solely enjoy the art which was not the intended audience for Earthly Delights. It’s designed for customers to enjoy a meal and drink surrounded by art and the atmosphere it creates. In this light, I think it works very well and is worth checking out. However, if you just want to check out some art then I’d pass and go to an actual gallery. Hopefully Miles’ next exhibition will be in such a venue as it’s a shame to keep his work hidden behind tables and chairs. Words by Jason Dirstein

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Arts

Do you know that Spectrum has opened a mini-galleries all over the Mount Lawley campus? They’re called ‘Spectrum Spaces’, where arts students may show-off their works in the small spaces provided. And by ‘small’, I mean really small, because some of them only contain one artwork. Still, since this Spectrum Spaces project is new, let’s be more considerate, yes? Anyway, here are quick reviews on each of these mini-galleries.

For example, rather than photographing tuna slices with vivid colours on a deep blue background (I like vivid colours), it might be better to photograph someone eating tuna slices, with a coast as the background. Other than that, however, I think the overall artworks are OK, especially one photograph that shows a metallic toilet. For some reason, I love the way light reflected in this picture. 2/5

Untitled by various artists The Photomedia Corridor: Building 3 Upstairs Corridor near the Screen Academy I really like this one. This mini-gallery doesn’t have a proper name and it consists of artworks made by various artists, but I found this one contains the more fascinating artworks among the other Spectrum Spaces I’ve reviewed. The photographic angles, the use of lighting and other technical details used in these photos give enough indication on the meaning behind each artwork. My personal favourites are a photo of a giraffe doll drowning in a glass full of water – only its head still dry, as if it’s really struggling to swim – and a four-frame picture that show a visual interaction between the pictures on the right and the ones on the left – at least that’s how I interpret it. The only thing I don’t like is the lack of a consistent theme/style/ colour-scheme/whatever that can show a connection between all the artworks. 4/5 Pet Photobooth by Justin Spiers and Yvonne Doherty The Hanging Space: Building 3 Upstairs Corridor north Pet Photobooth was intended to show a relationship between people and their pets. This can be seen pretty well in the picture of a family with their llama-in-pyjamas and a little girl hugging her white rabbit. These two are the ones I like, but the others don’t really work for me. Rather than focusing on the human-animal relationship, the other artworks just show various families with their pets, standing so still it almost looked awkward. It’d be nice if there could be some interactions happening between the humans and the pets. Pity, though, these artworks use fake poster backgrounds. It could be more engaging if the photos were taken in a real-life environment, so the human-animal relationship could look more natural. 2/5 Coasting by Ashley Porter The Display: Building 3 Upstairs Corridor north Coasting photographs the WA coastal landscape and urbanisation that takes place around the area – although there’s more urbanisation and a lot less coast. Sure, some of the photographed objects indicate coastal area, like the bag of (presumably) fresh prawns and the pack of tuna slices, but I think the focus could be changed from the objects themselves to the idea of ‘living by the seashore’ that they might represent.

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Rituals by Kelsey Diamond The Nook: Building 3 Upstairs Corridor near media centre The only thing I like is the contrast between the white dress, as well as the make-up so thick it reflects the light, and the dark background. Other than that, however, I can’t guess the meaning behind it. Sure, there are other props besides the photograph that support the idea of a ritual – like the dripping red candle, the yellowing paper with a picture of either Satan or a smiling kitten, an old stamp with a picture of a cat, and a bundle of sticks – but it doesn’t tell enough what kind of rituals is being performed. More visual clues could be helpful. 1/5 Words & Photo by Aldy Hendradjaja


Arts

Genital Panic by David Jo Bradley The Spectacle: Building 3 Design Corridor Located in the glass display in Building 3, near the big notice board on the first floor, Genital Panic is a collection of analogies photographs designed to appear surreal or hyper real. It is by far the most interesting exhibition around campus that I have seen for the location is fairly accessible. While this collection of photographs does not spell out anything to me personally, I would say that some of the photographs definitely did have a surreal effect to them. The pictures vary from a small child looking out of a car window to a girl flashing her breasts passing through the picture of a tree; you are bound to find something that will spark your attention. If you have some time to kill on campus, it is worth a glance. 3/5 Absent Memories by Brendan Cooper Spectrum Window Space: Spectrum Building This has to be by far the worst of the displays that I have reviewed solely because of its location. It is in Spectrum’s side display and you can see it only if you are walking through the little alley next to Spectrum Gallery going towards the Gazebo Area. The bushes don’t make it any easier for you to have a closer look either. There were a collection of pictures of tree trunks and I was not sure whether that was part of the collection so I wrote it out. What this is supposed to be? A collection of print works taken from sketches and photographs from old/ rundown buildings in Freo, all I can say is they looked nice and had a rustic feeling to it but nothing out of the ordinary there. 2.5 / 5

Pattern Recognition by Kate Goff The Breathing Space Building 8 Library Foyer This has to be one of the most poorly displayed spaces I have seen. Exhibited in the Library Foyer, I do not think anyone walking by even glances at the pictures. Inspired from the avant-garde Russian artist Aleksandr Rodchenko, I expected more than just a plain reproduction of what he did. This space, for me, is fairly unimpressive even though the concept is very interesting. The concept of using propaganda posters for artwork could have been exploited in a much better manner. Plain faces with splashes of green and red looks like something anyone could do on Photoshop. While the effects on the pictures themselves are pleasing overall, I do not see anything new or outstanding in this display. Overall, it is fairly unimpressive. 1.5 / 5 Words by Divya Jankee Desert Country by Greg Williams The Vitrine: Building 5 Corridor In this work, Greg Williams depicts the Australian desert landscape. He has gone with a simplistic style using bold flat colours on a rather large scale. This drives home the emptiness of the vast barren wasteland that is the Australian desert; however, on closer inspection you’ll notice the presence of birds. It reminds us that there is life in these places. Even though we may not think much of these places, many species call it home. It might imply that deserts are also worth protecting. 3/5 Reflection Pool by Paul Godfrey The Glory Hole: Building 5 Corridor This piece is the remnants of last semester’s graduate show fundraiser. Students and staff where encouraged to take blank wooden artist palettes and make them into something pretty for auction. This one didn’t sell and has managed to find its way to the Glory Hole. As the Spectrum Spaces are only in their infancy I assume this work is really just filler. It is after all just a photographic transfer of an alpine scene stuck to the palette. On a side note the staff member Ben Waters named the space the glory hole. It’s like his personal catch phrase or something. Just between you and me he is a little weird! 1/5 The decomposing effect on the modern eye by Wes Von Hooten The Broom Room: Inside 4.112 The Broom Room is actually pretty hard to find. It’s actually located in the student’s studio space in room 4.112, and I wouldn’t be surprised if in the past it really was a broom closet. This work is of the conceptual kind and consists of decaying mushrooms and sliced oranges, which is then projected onto the wall. These sorts of works are designed to engage the viewer and open conversation. They provide a starting point rather than a definitive answer. Without writing a thesis, I walked away with the idea of death and rebirth. That we are in a state of decay awaiting a period of rebirth. Go with a friend and see what you come up with. 3/5 Words by Jason Dirstein

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Books

Am I Black Enough For You? Anita Heiss 4/5

When We Remember They Call Us Liars - Suzanne Covich 3/5

Kimberley Stories Edited by Sandy Toussaint 4/5

This is one of the most thoughtprovoking and unsettling books I have ever read. When it came to colonizing Australia, we always heard the coloniser’s side of the story but now, this book gives us the other side of the story as well. Heiss presents some very interesting perceptions about being Aboriginal in an Australian society.

It is not easy to share a personal experience with the world, especially when it is about personal abuse. It is even harder to do so in way that is entertaining. For me, Covich has done that. I was engaged and attentive mostly throughout.

Kimberley is one of the most intriguing and exotic regions located on Australian soil. If you have been to the Kimberley then you will understand why it is one of Australia’s wonders. But if you haven’t been there, then ‘Kimberley Stories’ edited by Sandy Toussaint is just the book for you.

She engages the reader from the very first page as she talks about her childhood experiences, the impact that her parents have on her life, her education and career path and so on. However, this is not only an autobiographical account. It is also an appeal to academics and Australians to consider some of the compelling questions that come up in their society today. Questions such as: Why does she, as an Aboriginal, have to question her sense of belonging in a country that was originally her ancestors’? Why is the Aboriginal community presented the way it is in the media? Why can’t Australia give its Aboriginal community the same acknowledgement that the United States, Canada and New Zealand give to their Indigenous communities? Heiss does not make statements about what is good or bad. She just presents some of her own experiences, points out some problems and lets the reader come to their own conclusion. She does offer some viable solutions as well instead of just criticizing the system. I would personally recommend this book because it brings up some of the pressing concerns in Australian society today and offers a refreshing perspective about the perception of Aboriginals in Australia. Words by Divya Jankee

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Written using first person narrative, we perceive what Covich thinks and feels and that engages the reader. Most of her emotions are not revealed to characters around her. When she emancipates herself from her abusive father who had endorsed the saying “silence is golden”, it is rather liberating for the reader’s heart. The colloquial and the occasional vulgar language between the characters gave a sense of rawness and honesty to the book, all too familiar to today’s teenage lingo. I would personally find it hard to believe such a book if a teenager living in an extremely abusive environment did not swear. I did feel the story held back some important elements that could have emphasized on significant events better as I had go back to re-examine why the storyline suddenly changed dramatically at one point. The introduction was confusing and unclear but as the story evolved, the plot was greatly improved. While it was certainly a reflective piece of writing- taking me back to my childhood, a time when I was called a liar when I spoke the truth - it was nonetheless a typical child abuse biography. I recommend if you have nothing else to read on the train. Words by Jacky Le

It really describes Kimberley in a great amount of detail including the weather. Having been born and raised there, it really opened my eyes to things that I didn’t notice before or things that we take for granted such as the famous story of Jandamarra The Outlaw. I must warn you though that the book doesn’t exactly tell you stories about people who have visited. Rather, its is more about their experiences, how they felt at the time, as well as a very detailed description of things they had never seen before or were somewhat different from other places. The good thing about this book is that it gives you an insight into this unique and untouched region though I must say I was a bit disappointed that it didn’t have as many stories from the locals and the visitors. All in all, this really is a great book to read whether you just need a little reminder of your home or are about to embark on a journey there and just want to be prepared for what’s to come. I think everyone who has been there will agree that once known, never forgotten, Kimberley gets under your skin. Words by Kyra Edwards


Books

The Chemistry of Tears Peter Carey 2.5 / 5

What Women Want Janelle (Nelly) Thomas 4.5 / 5

The Australian Moment George Megalogenis 4/5

The Chemistry of Tears is the story of Catherine, a horologist at London’s Swinburne Museum, who emotionally breaks down when her secret (and married) lover Matthew dies suddenly. She is given the task of restoring a beautiful swan – a mechanism she first sees as a duck. Among the pieces of the swan, she finds the notebooks of Henry Brandling, the man who commissioned the swan as a gift to his dying son.

When I first heard about this novel I dreaded reading it because I thought it would be ‘boring’. I am very glad to be proven wrong. Nelly Thomas’s What Women Want is a novel that is interesting, engaging and amusing.

“Australia is the lucky country”. It’s recounted time and time again, to the point that if you’re talking about Australia to a bunch of foreigners, someone will mention it. It’s almost mythical now. Megalogenis has become a mythbuster here, and ripped it to shreds. He contends that we weren’t just ‘lucky’ with our natural resources and haven’t just been living on that. He states that we made our luck. Drawing on the governments of Whitlam, Keating, Howard and Rudd, the last 40 years Megalogenis argues they were run with a good economic outlook that has been the reason we have stood so well as a nation in troubling times.

Consumed by grief at Matthew’s death, Catherine decides to steal Henry’s notebooks, and is consumed by the story of the Englishman from 157 years before. Catherine’s obsession with describing her dead lover becomes both irritating and tiring by the end of the first page. Her motives are explained as ‘grief’, and the story of restoring the swan is more about letting her assistant do the work and getting irritated when she takes an interest in the history of the swan and the man who commissioned it – an action I personally don’t understand. Henry Brandling isn’t much better. He reminds the reader continuously that this creation is for his dying son, and that he thinks the family he’s staying with is stubborn, boring and stupid. The ending is anti-climatic and unexpected. Basically, it was well written, but there was no clear plot. It left me confused. Words by Ashley Swetman

She draws you in from the very beginning and the childhood tales about growing up in rural Western Australia were entertaining. Before I knew it, I was half way through the novel! Nelly Thomas is a comedian, novelist and health ambassador, described as one of Australia’s most innovative thinkers in 2011. Her novel asks the question; in a world where you have a great range of options, how do you choose your profession and who you want to be? It’s an easily relatable question because everyone has been asked the same about their future life choices at least once in their lives. Through the narration of her life experiences, Thomas uses the novel to tackle issues such as body image, social pressure, and family through the narration of Thomas’s life. The novel is full of wit and humour; its language is easy to read and understand and I think it’s suitable for anyone who wants to read it. It’s the kind of autobiography that won’t put you to sleep. This novel is a must read. Words by Rafeif Ismail

The second part of the book discusses Generation W, as he puts it, as born from 1964. Generation W is listed in this book as the generation “...in which women are better educated than men, and the Australian-born children of immigrants are better educated than their local peers”. Ladies and gentlemen, Megalogenis calls Generation W full of “Women and Wogs” – literally. Threading the tales of Australian politics and the economy, declassified federal documents, the effects of the oil spike in the 70’s and the GFC in recent years, the by-line of “How we were made for these times” is that we are well situated to ride out any great recessions. At times it can be a little one sided, but what book that tackles the modern world isn’t going to be, in some regard? Words by Delshard Mozhdeninia

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Books

GSM interviews Alan Carter

GSM: What inspired you to write Prime Cut? Alan: Prime Cut came about when our family moved to Hopetoun in 2007 so my wife, Kath, could take a job at the local school. She offered me a gig as a “kept man” - the deal was I stayed at home and did the cooking, cleaning and childminding and she’d take care of the breadwinning. In my spare time she said I could write that novel I’d always claimed was in me. She called my bluff. GSM: Is crime fiction your favourite genre? Are there any particular books and/or authors that inspire your writing? Alan: Yes. Crime is my favourite. I’ve read lots of it particularly over the last 15 years or so. My favourite crime authors/ books have been Ian Rankin’s Rebus series, James Lee Burke’s Robicheaux series, Graham Hurley’s Faraday & Winter series, Martin Cruz Smith’s Renko series and latterly Garry Disher and Michael Robotham. GSM: Since when have you been interested in writing novels? Alan:: Since about 2008, as above. Writing a novel was a dim, distant and seemingly unrealistic ambition I had in the back of my mind along with swimming in the English Channel, learning a musical instrument, and playing centre forward for Sunderland. My wife forced me into it, for which I will be eternally grateful. GSM: Congratulations for having your book shortlisted for the Crime Writers’ Association Debut Dagger Award. Can you tell us more about this award, and how did this achievement helped you publish your first novel? Alan:: It’s run every year and open to any unpublished author, I believe the deadline is sometime in February. The shortlist is announced in May and the winner announced in July at the Harrogate Crime Festival, where you get to rub shoulders with crime writing royalty like Ian Rankin, Val McDermid et al and get the eye and ear of publishers and agents. Getting shortlisted was a huge boost - the statistics for getting published are pretty daunting something like less than 1% of manuscripts find their way to the bookshelves and bookshops. Anything that you can wave around to mark out your difference and help haul you out of the swamp has to be a bonus. Going on to win the Ned Kelly Crimewriting Award for best first fiction was even more of a boost - it helps you get a contract for the second one! GSM: I have checked the website and, if I understand it correctly, you are only allowed to submit 3,000 word extracts of your novel to enter the Debut Dagger Award. Do you mind if I ask which part of the novel you submitted? How did you decide which part of the novel that can sum up the whole story? Alan:: I think they request the first 3000 words. Either way by that point I’d only written about 10,000 anyway. But the first 3000 is pretty important (in fact the first 100 or so are probably even more important) - setting the scene, establishing characters, kicking off the plot and hooking in your audience all happens during that first few pages.

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GSM: I read in the acknowledgement page that the book was originally titled Chinese Whispers. Why did you re-title it Prime Cut? Alan: There was already a relatively recently-written crime novel called Chinese Whispers out there waiting to ambush me no point in making your job to get noticed even harder. The publisher came up with Prime Cut and I liked it - it’s kind of crimey and meaty all in one go. GSM: The multicultural setting in your book really interests me. Even Cato, the main character, is of Chinese descent. Is there a specific message you want to convey by using migrants and migrants’ descendants in your character list? Alan: My day job is as a TV documentary maker and most of my work is for SBS. It’s second nature to me now to try and reflect the diversity of the society I’m telling stories in. But that’s not about being worthy or PC - it’s about looking for the fullest potential for more interesting characters and stories and settings. GSM: The depth of the characters and the plot is amazing. How do you invent them? Do you write them as you go, or do you set up a story plan before you start writing? Alan: For Prime Cut, I thought if I was going to be a “proper writer,” I really should have everything all planned and worked out from the beginning so I got a whiteboard and I wrote names and drew lines between them and stuff like that. I then ignored it and just got caught up in wherever the writing took me. I did have a loose outline in my head - body on beach, mining boom, exploitation, cold case psycho but that was it. Sometimes I wrote myself into a hole and had to dig myself out again but for the most part it was just great fun finding out where it would lead me. I did have the luxury of not really expecting to be published so I was out to enjoy myself for as long as the “kept man” gig lasted. For book two, I am doing a bit more forward planning as I now have deadlines to work to and am no longer a kept man of relative leisure. GSM: Do you have any tips for our readers who might be hoping to be published authors someday? Alan: 1 Write a lot. 2 Read a lot. 3 Try and find a benefactor, sugar mummy/daddy type person. GSM: What are your plans for the future? Alan: I am writing book 2 in the Cato Kwong series (due out next year) with at least one more to follow after that. I’m juggling that with the day job of making TV and hoping the writing will one day pay it’s own way. Thank you so much for the interview! I wish you the best for your next novels. Words by Aldy Hendradjaja


Music Film

Wish You Were Here Director: Kieran Darcy-Smith 4.5 / 5

The Pirates! Band of Misfits 3D Directors: Peter Lord, Jeff Newitt 2.5 / 5

Mirror Mirror Director: Tarsem Singh 3/5

Wish You Were Here is a psychological drama starring Teresa Palmer, Felicity Price, Antony Starr, and Joel Edgerton. It is a travellers worst nightmare; coming home knowing that your friend is still missing overseas. A group of four friends go on a fun holiday through South East Asia and everything is running smoothly until one night in Cambodia. The friends are dancing under a full moon, popping a few ecstasy pills and downing drinks and things get wild. Once the three friends get back to Sydney, their lives have been turned upside down.

Peter Lord and Jeff Newitt directed my favourite movies: Chicken Run and Wallace & Gromit. I had high hopes and high expectations for The Pirates! Band of Misfits before seeing the film. It was nothing like what I expected.

Mirror Mirror on the wall...we all know the fairytale. This movie is a little different as it is told from the wicked stepmother’s point of view. Julia Roberts plays the part of the stepmother/evil queen who is hated by the people and is attempting to regain control of her kingdom. Snow White is the banished princess who—with the help of the seven dwarves— tries to win her rightful place on the throne.

The cast is spectacular with talented Australians and New Zealand actors. Joel Edgerton plays Dave Flannery, a father of two and husband to Alice Flannery (played by Felicity Price). Both actors gave an intense and amazing performance. I was on the edge of my seat most of the time. I couldn’t wait to find out what happened next. The way Kieran Darcy-Smith directed this movie was incredible. I really liked how he shocked the audience by using a non-linear timeline. He shoots back and forth and this allows him to show how the truth comes out. I found it shocking to see the impact of a car crash juxtaposed against two people having wild sex at a party. It was dramatic. I personally am not a big fan of Australian dramas, but Kieran made me think and feel what those characters were going through. I would compare it to the full on movie Taken with Liam Neeson, only minus without the action. It shows an audience what can happen overseas. It’s a must see. Words by Aneta Grulichova

The plot of the film is about Pirate Captain (Hugh Grant) who attempts to win the Pirate of the Year Award for having the most booty ($$$) but has failed in the past. The Pirate Captain has to choose between fame and the glory of being crowned Pirate of the Year, or staying faithful to his trusted crew. Hugh Grant’s voice was hard to pick up on in the first 10 minutes, even though I knew he was the Pirate captain. The animation was detailed and Salma Hayek’s character Cutlass Liz had bootylicious features. It was definately a kid’s movie, but I was disappointed. I have no idea why they even made the film in 3D. I sat their most of the time with my 3D glasses off. If I am going to see a 3D movie, then I expect to have many things flying out of the screen. It is meant to be exciting! I want more than just a few cannon balls flying out at me. On the soundtrack, you can expect to hear songs from The Clash, Flight of the Concords and Blur. The songs fit perfectly with the plot. In the end all I got out of the movie was that I really want a pet monkey that does stuff for me. The older viewers will understand the Darwinism jokes that there kids aren’t going to notice. Overall I think it’s something you could take your kids to.

The film follows most of the traditional conventions of the tale but plays with some of the smaller details. The adorable Lily Collins (a.k.a as the offspring of musical genius Phil Collins) was perfectly cast as Snow White. I found her to be completely mesmerising and true to the tale—she really is the fairest of them all. The movie was well cast, entertaining and it had its funny moments. It certainly had its fair share of crafty one liners, however, it was a trifle too long and the mid section was a little boring. There was also a weird Bollywood style song at the end of the film which felt like an unnecessary add on. I must make mention of the wonderful costume and set design. The outfits were dramatic and colourful, and the set design was perfectly fitting of the classic fairytale. Embrace your inner child and go see this film. It will be interesting to see how Kristen Stewart’s new flick ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’ compares. It is due to be released in the next few months. Words by Asten Nunn

Words by Aneta Grulichova

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Film

Beauty and the Beast Directors: Gary Trousdale & Kirk Wise 4.5 / 5 I went to Beauty and the Beast not expecting too much because let’s face it, I thought of it as just a children’s cartoon. But as it turned out, it’s a classic for good reason. Combine Disney’s geniosity, characters and a great story and they will keep you glued to your seat. The kids in the audience seemed to agree, as no restless trips out of the theatre were made. Seeing it in 3D and on the big screen was a good experience, as both the quality and the sound, were improved. The movie started off with those old stand up books. The animated landscapes looked amazing in this format and the forbidden West Wing came to life. I liked how the lighting transitioned from dark to light symbolising the transition of the Beast. The best part of the movie is the characters. I still love the main character Belle, the girl with her nose stuck in a book, and then there’s all the usual Disney characters in the enchanted castle. I think my favourite was Chip – the little tea cup, with Angela Lansbury playing his mother, the teapot. It’s a good story, and the moral of the tale remains: beauty is skin deep. Beauty and the Beast is a great re-watch for both young and old before it heads back to the Disney vaults. Words by Toni Phillips

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Salmon Fishing in the Yemen Director: Lasse Hallström 3/5

Wrath of the Titans (3D) Director: Jonathan Liebesman 3.5 / 5

The moment I received the invitation for this film the first thing I thought was “stupid title”. And apparently I wasn’t alone. However I completely disregarded how stupid the title was when I saw the name Ewan McGregor.

Normally 3D movies are a dizzying array of useless props flying at you as you dive into plush movie theater chairs for cover. There is popcorn strewn everywhere, the effects don’t seem to add much to the movie itself. In the case of Wrath of the Titans, the opposite is true.

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen is a light-hearted, feel-good movie about love, faith and, well, fishing in Yemen. When a British fisheries expert Dr. Fred Jones (Ewan McGregor) was contacted by Harriet Chetwode-Talbot (Emily Blunt) about a Yemeni sheik’s vision to bring salmon fishing to the Yemen, he laughed at the idea until political circumstances forced him to participate. And so the quest to import thousands of fish to the Yemen began, as did his love affair with Chetwode-Talbot. My heart melted the moment I saw Ewan McGregor talking in his Scottish accent. He took a good 45 minutes of my attention before I started to really focus on the plot. The locations of the movie, both in the Scottish highlands and the Moroccan desert, were very pleasing to the eyes. The visuals were appealing and the score, amazing. It succeeded in entertaining me for the most part, although I felt that the ending is a bit forced. There was another element to it that didn’t fit in. The opposition brought by a group of people in Yemen felt like it was very short lived and underexposed. It seemed like they just appeared out of nowhere. It was almost as if Hallström wanted the audience to be omnipresent but he failed terribly. All I felt was under informed. Nevertheless, I was thoroughly entertained by the movie. I’d watch it on a cheap Tuesday. Words by Dina Waluyo

The 3D effects add the extra texture that it was intended to. The viewer gets a sense of the tortuous path that the hero, Perseus (Sam Worthington) must travel to save his father, Zeus (Liam Neeson) from death. This is a BIG movie: big effects, big action and big acting from powerhouses Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes. The ever delightful Bill Nighy even makes an appearance. And despite a somewhat lackluster romance between hero Perseus and Queen Andromeda (Rosamund Pike), the warrior queen is quite likeable. There is humor weaved throughout the story making it an even more enjoyable experience for the viewer. There is a cheesiness factor, as is expected with films of this genre, as well as a thinned out storyline by the end (as though they wasted too much energy with the middle of the movie). Overall, it’s a good flick to see in 3D for a matinee. Not a full evening admission price, but definitely worthy of a matinee admission. Words by Julie Khan


Games

Have you ever woken up one morning planning to head out, but then discovered to your dismay that it was pouring rain outside? I know the feeling, gee. That’s why I’ve prepared a list of five great games you can stay at home and play by yourself or with some friends and family. 5. Amnesia: The Dark Descent (PC GAME: 1 PLAYER) This is brilliant to play during a dark, rainy day because it will add to the already eerie atmosphere of the game. It’s a first person adventure where you wake up in a large, old mansion and must find a way to escape. However, you aren’t alone in this mansion. There’s ugly, mutated creatures roaming about that chase you once catching sight of you. That’s the other thing; you don’t possess any weapons to defend yourself. This whole game is like a cat and mouse chase; you must run into rooms and hide in cupboards until you no longer hear the monsters around you. You must watch your sanity level, which determines how easy your character is to move around and the clarity of your vision in the game. The types of things that affect your sanity include how long you stay in darkness for (you’ll need to regain sanity by being near light) and how often you look at the monsters (try to avoid looking directly at them). Overall this is an intense, adrenaline-pumping game and I don’t know many people who have dared to finish the game. 4. Bomberman (NINTENDO DS: 1-8 PLAYERS) Playing this game with a bunch of your pals can get really competitive. It starts off all innocent – planting bombs to break blocks so that you can get closer to other players, but as soon as one player kills another… SHIT GETS REAL. All you do in the game is plant bombs to break blocks that contain power ups and such, then bomb other players to be the last one standing. It’s a survival of the fittest. I always play this game with family friends who bring over their Nintendo DS and we have an epic Bomber Man tournament. I’m not exaggerating when I tell you that during these tournaments there is a heavy use of course language, formations of alliance between players, backstabbing and acts of bitter revenge! I’m telling you, it doesn’t get boring due to the amount of revenge that goes on in the game. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard things like “Who the f*ck is the [insert relevant colour here] one? Son of a gun killed me. I’m coming for you next round.” 3. Monopoly (BOARD GAME: 2-8 PLAYERS) Monopoly! Who doesn’t enjoy a good game of Monopoly? I love how both children and adults can play this game. I’ve played a couple of times with my eight-year-old sister, and she really loves it. Another reason I like this game so much is the fact that Monopoly can go for hours, even days if players are willing to stay up just to finish the game! That’s also the reason behind this game being suitable for a rainy day; it takes forever to finish so you don’t have to worry about running out of things to do. The main things you do in the game are roll dice, buy properties, and receive and lose money. It’s interesting finding out which of your friends have good financial habits like saving up and only spending money at the right time, and which of them don’t know how to handle their cash wisely.

2. Christmas Escape Neutral is an excellent game designer who creates escape-the-room type of games (which I adore playing in my spare time). This is such a cute game series. It consists of three escape-the-room games called Christmas Escape one, two and three. The storyline of the first one (surprise, surprise) is you’re trapped in a cabin and it’s snowing and freezing outside. The first of the trilogy might be easy, but don’t underestimate the others; it gets trickier. I suggest having a pen and paper nearby whilst completing the games because there are quite a few symbols and numbers to note down to solve the various puzzles. It takes careful observation of each of the items in the rooms of each game but trust me you’ll have a lot of fun. 1. Kingdom Hearts (PLAYSTATION TWO: 1 PLAYER) Kingdom Hearts could well be my favourite game. Square Enix teamed up with Disney for the creation of this game meaning there are a variety of Final Fantasy characters as well as Disney characters. The main character Sora travels with Goofy and Donald to different worlds to help kill the monsters that have recently been causing mayhem. These monsters are called “Heartless” and only the Keyblade can defeat them. My favourite world is the 100 Acre Wood as we are helping Winnie the Pooh and all his friends. It’s really exciting seeing all the Final Fantasy characters like Aerith and Yuffie interact with the Disney characters, because prior to Kingdom Hearts I would never have imagined that happening. Being honest, I used to skip several days of high school during winter to play Kingdom Hearts, because the thought of exploring and saving new worlds appealed more to me than stepping out in the cold, wet mornings to go to school. I used to snuggle up amongst my blanket and pillows, with controller in hand and play to my (kingdom) heart’s content. It’s like a spell because after completing one world, I would have this crazy urge to visit the next and if I didn’t I’d be thinking all day about what it’d be like. This is the best game ever to play on a rainy day, because the storyline is too interesting to ignore, and it’ll have you so hooked that you’ll forget how many hours have passed you by. Words by Mimi Rukmarata

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Music

Welcome to this month’s edition of the GSM Music Section. At the time of writing this article, GSM is in the grips of a bloody war against Murdoch’s student magazine (whose name shall not be mentioned in these hallowed pages) over the prestigious title of “Perth’s second most popular student magazine on Facebook.” Having only hours ago left the GSM war room, located in a high-security bunker in the Nevada desert, I write with the satisfaction of knowing the final stroke upon the heads of the profligate Murdoch swine has been mapped out. I hope then that this new edition reaches you from the printing press of the blood-soaked victors, if not, there’s always the cyanide… Therefore, I urge you to look us up on Facebook. Just one ‘like’ could save an editor like me. As for music, with RTRFM’s In The Pines festival and Supafest just passed everyone’s looking toward Groovin’ The Moo to fulfil their penchant for overpriced festival food and personal space invasion. If you’re not a festival fan then stay on the look out for Florence and The Machine, Kaiser Chiefs, Kimbra, Brian Jonestown Massacre as they’re all coming to town in May. And for those history students out there that might be interested in digging up fossils, be sure to see The Back Street Boys and New Kids On The Block as they play the Burswood Dome on the 29th. Well, that’s all for the music section this month. Back to the spirit-crushing monotony of uni life! Words by Shaun Cowe music.editor.gsm@gmail.com

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CHILDREN COLLIDE

HOLLY THROSBY

In just a few years, Children Collide went from jamming in their share house to being nominated for an ARIA for Best Rock Album for ‘Theory of Everything’, that featured their hit single ‘Loveless’. Bassist Heath Crawley said they were “stoked” to be working with David Michôd, director of the multi-award winning film ‘Animal Kingdom’, for their music video. ‘Loveless’ depicts lead singer and guitarist Johnny Mackay as a clown having his hair cut off, getting shed of “Whatever it is he needed to get shed of.”

Although the night got off to an awkward start due to sound and equipment difficulties (the band travels sans drumkit for fear of excess baggage charges) Holly Throsby quickly “Rearranged the Furniture”, and began delighting fans with the calming, sweet whisper of her voice. Holly is paired benevolently with the instrumental talents of backing band the Hello Tigers.

‘Loveless’ isn’t the only music video the Melbourne-based trio has produced that forces the audience to question what they are watching. Heath said on the topic of their latest video, ‘Sword to a Gunfight’, where the band are seen wearing a variety of animal masks, that, “At the end of the day, it’s an art piece. It should be open to interpretation of what everything actually means.” The band name has also created discussions on its meaning. “Originally I was living in a share house with Johnny and our original drummer Lauren Hughes,” Heath said, “And on the fridge was an electricity bill that was overdue and in an attempt to get everyone together I wrote ‘Children collide’, as in “Unite people, let’s pay this sucker!” Children Collide will be heading back on the road later in the year for their newest album, ‘Monument’, which was released in April. “With luck everyone will dig it,” Heath said, “Because we do.” Words by Francesca Mann

Performing for a small but supportive crowd in the Basement of the Norfolk Hotel, Holly Throsby could do no wrong. The Sydney-sider brought her latest Australian tour to an end with a relaxed, intimate show, which allowed audience members to catch a glimpse into the workings of Holly’s mind and her band. The laid-back attitude of Holly, drummer Bree van Reyk and bassist Jens Birchall led to some songs needing to be restarted, yet this simply added to the warm, welcoming vibe which Holly radiates effortlessly. Playing favourites such as It’s Only Need, Warm Jets, and Making a Fire, Holly also covered Lucinda Williams, with an acoustic rendition of her 1980 song Happy Woman Blues. Throughout the night Holly entertained us with stories of eating entire jars of olives, and how 2012 had become the “Year of the Pattern” she also, wowed the crowd with a particularly bad joke about fish and chips. Ending with the stirring “Kind of cover” of Seeker Lover Keeper’s ‘Even Though I’m a Woman’ and her own ‘What I Thought of You’, it wasn’t hard to see that Holly loves what she does, and welcomes all to share it. Words by Amanda Peddel


Music

KILL TEEN ANGST NO WALLS IN THE SKY 2/5 Kill Teen Angst is a Perth based fourpiece band, influenced by alternative bands of the 90s, and this is clear from their sound. Constant drums and bass drive the rhythm, and there are some great guitar solos, but the vocals are what turn me off – lead vocalist Scott Tomlinson has no real dynamic shifts in the songs. Each song is sung at the same volume all the way through, and while he doesn’t have a bad voice, the music would sound a lot better with dynamic contrast. As the band name suggests, ‘angst’ is a central theme throughout the tracks on the album, whether about love or majority groups. The lyrics work well with the music something a lot of bands don’t manage to do, and mood contrasts within songs are implied by the change in rhythm. Listening to the album the whole way through gets a tad tiring. Imagining where this type of music would go in a movie scene, I keep coming up with it accompanying a scene of wild partying. As for regular listening, it works great as soft background music while driving or doing homework. As a first release, it’s not bad. The music isn’t bad. The lyrics aren’t bad. But for me, there’s no real stand out track. Everything sort of sounds the same, with no real display of different internal style. Saying that, it’s not good either, but there’s definite potential for improvement in their next release. Words by Ashley Swetman

RAINY DAY WOMEN SLEIGH BED 4/5 Rainy Day Women is a recently formed Perth indie pop quintet, who have recently released their first EP, Sleigh Bed. After listening to the five tracks in this album, the question must be asked, is this band on the way to huge success? Well, judging by their first ever release, I say hell yeah. This is a great album with fantastic songs by Dylan Ollivierre. This is for any fan of The Beatles’ or Vampire Weekend’s style. Even though it brings nothing strikingly new to the table, it’s still very good. The first track, ‘Sleigh Bed’, is a great start, and it’s one of my favourites. It has a minimalist clean style, with great harmonising and a great beat. This vibe continues throughout the album with ‘Betty Blue’ and ‘On the Run’ being runners up for my other two favourites. The only problem with Rainy Day Women is that the lyrics can be difficult to decipher. If having a similar sound to ‘Sleigh Red’ and ‘Aimee’ is difficult to understand. With that being said, Rainy Day Women offers fantastic melodies and beats, which easily get stuck in your head. Overall, the album is great. I am a little disappointed that there are only five songs. I would have loved to have heard more from the band. While a little pricey for a five-track album, Rainy Day Women are definitely worth a listen. Words by James Blackburn

SONS OF RICO REACTIONS 3.5 / 5 Sons of Rico are an Indie Rock band straight out of Perth, their debut album ‘Reactions’ entwines contemporary sounds with a psychedelic twist. The quintet is incredibly dynamic, with drummer Adam Weston from Birds of Tokyo and singer/guitarist Alex MacRae who brings a new voice to Australian music. Together with Glenn Sarangapany on guitar and Brett Murray on keyboard, the quintet present familiar vintage sounds from the likes of Oasis, Queen, Led Zeppelin and possibly even Bowie and Kiss. ‘Reactions’ is filled with retro sounds and after a few spins you will be wanting more. ‘Reactions’ opens with ‘Miss Adventure’, catchy and familiar to Triple J rotation and RTRFM, it’s a great indication of what is to come in this aesthetic indie rock album. ‘In The Morning’ radiates with a strong Bowie influence. The soft contemporary piano and falsetto vocals underpin the power of obsession, exemplified in the lyrics “Stuck in a loop, in a loop, in a loop.” ‘Just A Bit’ suggests naive metacognitive thoughts, it emphasises “...We all do the same” and this is shown quite prominently though the somewhat eerie acoustics. The fresh sounds within ‘Reactions’ are creative and satisfying. I definitely recommend this album, and suggest that everyone have a listen to support the rise of talented Perth musicians. The worthwhile indulgence of ‘Reactions’ will promote an appreciation for Sons of Rico, and offer a rewarding music experience. Words by Alexandra Biundo

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