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SGL Contents
4 Editor’s Letter 5 Life with Lester Greene 7 Ask Nathan 8 Andre Brings His Flavor to Us 13 Books 14 Movies 15 Music 3
Editor’s Letter: Ain’t It Funny
Hey ya'll, we are back with an exciting new issue this week with Popular Blogger Andre Allen. I had the opportunity to sit down and interview him about his Life, Health, Sex and the Future. Those of you that have read every issue; know that I have been experiencing some issues in my love life. Where I have been led on by this man that I liked and respected for over 14 months to find out that he was just flirting with me and he has had a boyfriend for the last 7 months. Well as I was finishing up this issue this week guess who came a calling that same man that fucked with my emotions and feelings. I listened to everything he said he was experiencing and a song from the movie Diary of A Mad Black “Ain’t It Funny” sung by Heather Headley. The words say “Tried to leave me broken and confused, You tried to hurt me; Throw me out like something used; But now your back and you need me for everything; To help you, and keep you, hold you and need ya; Oh, how things have changed; Ain't it funny how life goes around; Same people you meet goin' up; You see them coming down; But ain't it funny how you need me now; Same women you missed treated.” The reason I am telling you all of this is be careful who you mess with because that same person you fucked over will be that same person you need when you don’t have anyone. I am a man who is down for his man and I will treat you like a king, but if you fuck me over there want be a second chance. t funny how you can need me now Same women you miss treated is your everything now funny how you can need me now Same women you miss treated is your everything now. Our life coach Nathan 7 Scott is back with his wonderful advice about changing. We also have or new columnist Lester Greene back talking about something that we all face and that is the fear of being lonely. Go to www.sglliving.ning.com to read, Please let us know what you think about the issue sglweeklymag@gmail.com. Cordially, Cleavester Brooks Editor In Chief http://twitter.com/cleavester 4
Life with Lester Greene
Scared of Lonely By: Lester Greene
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Everybody wants to love and be loved. We spend our entire lives trying to please other people, trying to gain some sense of acceptance - a feeling of belonging. Old, young, we all want to feel special. I mean sure we all want to have loads of money, but what good is it if we don't have somebody else to share it with? Why else do people date or get married or even have promiscuous sex? There's this idea of feeling connected to something or someone, all the while living the American Dream of having a wife, kids and white-picket fences. Funny, I always thought the American Dream was freedom. A certain Dr. Martin Luther King indoctrinated this very idea, but doesn't this idea of freedom involve a certain level of dissociation? Why then are people so intent on mixing and mingling with society? On one hand you want your space and privacy, but on the flip side you want companionship and partnership. It's like wanting to have the best of both worlds. I know when I was single and in my early twenties I felt invincible. I felt like nothing could touch me, but somewhere deep down in my heart I was praying for someone to touch me. I didn't like being alone. All of my friends were dating and some were even married and I just felt useless. I just walked around with a low self-esteem. That is until, of course I met my partner who is 40 years my senior. Prior to that, I suffered from depression, but I never had a desire to sleep around or have one night stands. You see I think people get to the point where I was and just give up all hope of finding someone special. And that's when the drugs, sex and booze kicks in. Your life then starts to spiral out of control. You lose all sense of reality and the next thing you know, you find yourself at the bar looking for some kind of assurance. Till this day, I never understood the bar scene. For me, it's just a place for lonely people to make false connections. Everything about the bar is bad. The music is almost always too loud, and the smell is just hideous. Watching club goers soak their miseries in alcohol is not my idea of fun, aside from the fact that the competition is high and just around the corner is a better looking guy. Today, because of the Internet, hook-ups are so common and easy. You don't even have to leave your apartment to meet someone. Everything is a mouse-click away. You can visit popular websites like Rentboys.com, Adam4Adam.com and Craigslist.com to have a good time. Granted, you are using these sites at your own risk and never mind why you're using these sites for sex in the first place. You need to be extra cautious because you are dealing with strangers who are dealing with other strangers and so forth. These kinds of situations are considered high risk for diseases. Why someone would want to subject himself to such conditions is anybody's guess. I guess the price of companionship is much greater than I thought; if people are wiling to risk their own lives for a quick thrill. Everyday we take chances on finding someone, hoping that next relationship is the one that will set us free and deliver us from a life of solitude.
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Ask Nathan
My boyfriend of four years constantly cheated on me. This year I decided I was done with him- then he changed. He started regularly going to church and counseling with me. But I don't feel the same for him as I years ago. Should I stay or go? -Maurice Maurice Only you can decide if you should continue with the relationship. I do believe that people are capable of change. If you believe in the relationship and him then sticking it out may benefit both of you. Sit down and evaluate the relationship together. Create a "Sevenly" Day! _____________________________________________ Nathan "Seven" Scott Professional & Personal Life Coach Visit me online: www.nathansevenscott.com Tweet me: www.twitter.com/nathansevenscot
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Andre Brings His Flavor to Us A Cleavester Brooks Interview 8
Cleavester: Hello Andre, How are you doing? I am doing well and thank you for interviewing me for your magazine. You have done great job with this magazine and again thanks for choosing little ole me to be apart of such greats who have been given the honor to grace your cover. Cleavester: What is your blog Andre's Flava about? It’s a mixture of entertainment, sports, and community news that affects the black LGBT community as a whole and every now and again I share my personal life. Cleavester: When did you start it? I started blogging back on September of 2005 after returning from the Black Gay Research Summit in NYC where I had the opportunity to meet a lot of the originally bloggers and leaders of the community at the time which included Shelton Jackson, Keith Boykin, and frank Roberts such to name a few people. My blog was originally named lauderboi1500 since at the time I was living in Ft. Lauderdale, FL
Cleavester: How much time do you spend on your blog? Where do you get your ideas from? I spend a lot of time on the blog depending on how I am feeling at the time to be honest. I get ideas from world news and what’s affecting our community. Cleavester: Who is Andre Allen? I am a laid back person who tries his best to do right by people and is a very caring and giving person. I also like to give a helping hand to the community when need be. I have been a Community activist since 2003 and lending my voice to the south Florida community prior to me moving 9
to DC I have yet to get involve here in DC because I feel that DC does not have a cohesive community that gives a damn about one another. Cleavester: Where are you from? I am originally from Ft. Lauderdale, Florida and have been living in the DC area since December 2007 Cleavester: What was life like growing up? Life had its ups and down but in the end it allowed me to be a strong person that I am today because of it. Cleavester: What did you want to be growing up? I wanted to be a journalist and in high school I was high school sports editor as well as a freelance writer for the Miami Herald while in High School which allowed me to cover High School Sports in the area. Cleavester: When did you catch HIV? I became positive in Oct of 2003 Cleavester: How did you catch it? How has it change your life? I had a threesome with a childhood friend of mine and a former high school basketball coach. Condoms were used doing the act but somehow along the way during the act a condom came off and well I became positive. I must say I do not harbor any bad feelings at all for becoming infecting. It has allowed me to do a lot of great things in the community because of it and I have met a lot of great people who I probably not have come in contact with if I was negative in my opinion. Cleavester: What advice would you give to people out there? Never give up on your dreams no matter how long they take to achieve them. Never lose hope and always press forward no matter how hard life might seem at the moment. Stay Focus and keep your eye on the prize. Cleavester: If you had a chance to start over would you? Um I ask myself that question a lot and sometimes the answer is yes and sometimes its no because if I do that I would miss out on what has already happen and if I don’t it gives me the opportunity to correct my wrongs and make them right. Cleavester: What is your guilty pleasure? sweets are my guilty pleasure. especially chocolate and I love cooking when I am up to it and in the mood too. Cleavester: What has been your biggest sexual fantasy? Wow that’s a good one my biggest sexual fantasy I guess I am not gay because I can honestly say I do not have one at the moment. I think I have fulfilled most of the fantasies that I have wanted thus far and if something comes up and I want it I will conquer it. 10
Cleavester: When did you have your first kiss? I had my first kiss when I was 18 along with my first sexual experience. Cleavester: Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now? Mr. Right because you can have Mr. right now and in the end he may not be Mr. right for the Long Term but Mr. Right Now for the time and I don’t want that. Cleavester: Favorite Southern Dish? well I would not consider my self a typical southern because I am a very picky eater and I do not eat any and everything. lol but I will eat anything Italian. Cleavester: What do you look for in a guy? I look for someone who is caring, compassionate, has a good a head on their shoulder as well as can bring 100 percent to the relationship and not half. I need someone who will be there thick thru thin. I am not the one that has a list of criteria's like a lot of folks I am a simple guy wanting another simple person who does not come with excessive baggage because we all have baggage just be open and honest and we will be ok. Cleavester: Do you want to get married and have babies? Why or Why Not? Yes I love kids and kids have always have a special place in my heart even though I am still a young person myself I would be a great father. And as far as marriage if I find Mr. Right and the opportunity presented itself sure I would get married in a heartbeat. Cleavester: Celebrity you've been mistaken for? Lol no one that I can think of. I was called Steve Urkel when I was younger and my mom thought I looked like Fred Astire. Cleavester: Tell me something about you that your fans may be surprised to know? I am a very low key person who is mostly a home body person. Give me a good book or movie and I am content. I am not a party person at all so you won’t see me in the clubs and bars like that. Cleavester: What can we expect from you in the future? in the future you can expect me being more active and helping to guide this community in the right direction along side some of our upcoming and active leaders already in our community who are doing great things. Leaders such as Darian Aaron, Xem Van Adams, Lonnell Williams, Derrick Briggs and many others. Cleavester: How can the people get in contact with you? You Can contact me via www.twitter.com/andresflava as well as you can find me on facebook by searching Andre Allen Cleavester: Do you have any special message for our readers?
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Nothing that I can think of off the top of my head. Just continue to be the best you can be. Continue to fight the good fight for all people and most of all BE YOU! And don’t let no one or thing change you. Thank you Andre for taking the time to do this interview.
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Books
Love Yourself First Dwight Jones was a successful business executive working in banking. Although he was making decent money, he knew corporate America was not for him. So he decided to team up with one of his dear friends who worked in fashion, Issiah Richards, and they started their own fashion consulting business, Vondel Consulting. Joan Murphy was an up-and-coming shoe designer. A friend of hers who worked in the fashion industry, Stacey, referred Joan to Dwight and Issiah, and she was contracted to work with them. Joan was looking to do anything she could to be on top, including destroying whatever or whoever got in her way-and with her man, Rob, and her newfound friend and publicist, Karen Newberg, by her side, she felt she could conquer the world. That is, until she realized that everything that sparkled wasn't diamonds. Dwight and Issiah found themselves wrapped up in a world of drama as Joan did whatever was necessary to make it to the top. As scandals, lies, and deceit began to unravel, Joan found herself in a world she only dreamed of-but it was a tragic reality as Issiah and Dwight fought for peace among the stars.
Enter me: the mind of CD Rajahm Endure a journey of short stories that convey the pain, joy, sorrow and glee of CD Rajahm. It will make you think, wonder and clutch your pearls as the rollercoaster swerves through each extraordinary experience. If you think you know CD Rajahm Sellers, you have no idea. Enter Me will elucidate the disarray about the man you thought you knew. 13
Movies
Training Rules Narrated by international swimming legend Diana Nyad (National Public Radio), Training Rules examines how women's collegiate sports, caught in a web of homophobic practices, destroyed the dreams of many of its most talented athletes. Specifically, the documentary examines the Penn State's women's basketball program under 26 year veteran Rene Portland. She had three rules in her program: No drinking, No drugs, No lesbians. After years of discrimination documented here, Portland was sued by a player and Penn State was forced to confront the issue.
I Can't Think Straight Gifted director Shamin Sarif boldly returns with a vibrant, modern-day Sapphic tale of two successful women who summon the courage to challenge their cultures in the name of love. While preparing for her wedding, Tala meets Leyla, a shy Muslim. Although they come from different 14
worlds, the attraction is immediate and Tala must decide whether to stay true to her culture or to her heart.
Music
Woman in Love Maysa is, without a doubt, one of the finest soul/jazz vocalists of the past 15 years. "A Woman In Love" has Maysa breaking new ground. For the first time on CD, Maysa embraces some of the great jazz repertoire made famous by such greats as Billie Holiday, Nina Simone, Ella Fitzgerald and more, while still maintaining that unique, soulful Maysa magic. Like such artists as Diana Krall, Cassandra Wilson and Melody Gardot, Maysa is bringing a new fresh sound to the world of jazz!
Sol-Angel and the Hadley St. Dreams Solange is an American actress, R & B and pop singer, songwriter, producer, model, and dancer. She heads into a new musical direction with elements of 'modern twist on hip-hop and R & b flecked with tinges of blues and jazz' the album contains production by Cee-Lo Green, Soulshock & Karlin, Polow da Don and Mark Ronson as well as appurtenances by Q-Tip, Lil' Wayne, Estele and Bilal. The CD was produced by The Neptunes. Everyone slept on this album, eluding me. And now I am fully awake. From beginning to end I sang and dance to this wonderful young lady. My favorite song off of the am is cut number 10 with Bilal which is called Cosmic Journey and his voice just fucked me completely. 15
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