signups at 10-11am in front of manning bar on the day Teams of no more than four people. Points based system with over 100 clues awesome prizes for 1st 2nd and 3rd place Get a scavenger pack and pizza for participating
Join campus culture 2011 facebook group for more event details *at least one person per team must have a camera phone or digital camera for proof of item completion
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ISSUE 03 CONTENTS
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IS IT FUN BEING FUNNY?
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EDITORS
Paul Karp Alex McKinnon Kira Spucys-Tahar Anne Widjaja Lewis D'Avigdor usubullmag@gmail.com CONTRIBUTORS
Naazbano Schonberger, Elizabeth Mora, Melissa Werry, Margy Hinder, Lasya Chitrapu, Michael Coutts, Adam Wall, Erin Rooney, Brendan Day, Harriet McInerney, Paul Ellis, Robert North, Max Halden, Elizabeth Schaffer, Sam Burnham, Tim Scriven DESIGN
Anjali Belani PUBLICATIONS MANAGER
Chris Beaumont
WWW.USUONLINE.COM
LIKE US
FACEBOOK.COM/USUBULLMAGAZINE The views in this publication are not necessarily the views of USU. The information contained within this edition of Bull Magazine was correct at the time of printing. This publication is brought to you by the University of Sydney Union and The University of Sydney. ISSUE 03, 2011
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THE POWER OF THIRDPARTY ADVERTISING
10
THE ETHICS OF ETHICS CLASSES
18
INSIDE THE EVANGELICAL UNION
21
HAND-TO-MOUTH: ROUGHING IT FOR CHARITY
28
News Columns Competitions What’s On Interview Campus Chatter Student Lifestyle Travel Health Food & Booze Sport Science & Tech Entertainment Reviews Mindgames The Bull Pen Caught on Campus
04 05 06 08 17 24 31 33 34 35 36 37 38 40 43 45 46
CONTENTS 21/04/11 11:46 AM
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BULL USUONLINE.COM NEWS
1 Election Day approaches for the USU Board. Ballots will drop 25 May.
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2 Former USU President Pat Bateman was part of Sydney Law School’s World Championship team.
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NEWS ELECTION CANDIDATES PREPARE FOR THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL It’s that time of year again: the University of Sydney Union Board elections are only a few weeks away and this year, 10 candidates will be compete for votes to be elected to the 2011/2012 USU Board of Directors. The hopeful students vying for six positions on the Board are, in ballot order: Jacqui Munro, Brigid Dixon, Mina Nada, Astha Rajvanshi, Alexandra Cowan, Ava Harvey, Nai Brooks, Rhys Pogonoski, Zac Thompson and Shane Treeves. Election Day is on Wednesday 25 May at several polling locations around campus. All current USU members are eligible to cast their ballot, and last year a
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record voter turnout of more than 6,200 members exercised their democratic right. Members who are unable to vote on the day of the election can apply in person at the ACCESS Desk and International Student Lounge for a voting paper from 16 May up until 24 May. This year, for the first time, the USU will run an electronic-based ballot system in order to cut down on paper wastage and promote environmental practices. The official campaign trail begins Monday 9 May, but the social media storm began as soon as nominations closed. The candidates are subject to a strict spending cap of $700, to be used on limited amounts of t-shirts, posters, fliers and other promotional materials. The annual Election Soapbox will
be held on 10 May at Manning Bar, each candidate will be given a few minutes to speak to members and field questions from student representatives.
INTERNATIONAL LAW HONOURS FOR FORMER USU PRES Patrick Bateman, the Immediate Past President of the University of Sydney Union, celebrated with fellow Sydney Law School teammates after being crowned champions of the world’s largest mock trial tournament, the Philip C Jessup International Law Moot Court Competition. Bateman and four other Sydney law students rose above 130 other teams from more than 80 countries in the competition held in Washington, USA late in March. Faculty advisor, Dr Tim Stephens, travelled with the team and was impressed by their performance in the mock courts. “It was such a momentous achievement,” Dr Stevens told the Inner West Courier. “They performed at such a high level and constantly got remarks from judges saying the quality of their arguments were
better than any other they’ve seen or heard.” Representing Sydney were Patrick Wall, Chris Beshara, Glenn Kembrey and Chelsea Tabart, who along with Bateman, were each in their final year of a law degree. They defeated Columbia University in the final. It was the third time Sydney have claimed the Jessup crown, winning previously in 1996 and 2007.
THE BBQ IS BACK! That enticing sound and smell of burgers and fries sizzling on the BBQ on Manning Bar’s balcony has been sorely missing from our favourite student bar this year, but salvation is close, with a relaunch due early this May. The new BBQ setup has been expanded to cater for increased student demand, and exciting new menu items will be available. Rumour has it that there'll be new steak and chicken schnitzel options, and something known as the ‘Mykonos’ burger.
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ISSUE 03 COLOUMNS
COLUMNS EDITOR’S NOTE PAUL, ALEX, KIRA, ANNE & LEWIS
O
h hai there. The year rolls on, dear reader. May already, the mid-sem break behind us, exams looming in the distance like an impending train-wreck, how time flies. By this stage, no doubt you’ve shed all but the most interesting, important or expensive lectures, and readings are but a fond memory. Good thing you’ve picked up the third issue of Bull to distract you from whatever you should be doing right now and revitalise your tired body, foggy mind and weary spirit. Speaking of spirit, we’re taking a turn for the holy this week, getting up close and personal with the Evangelical Union and delving into the ethics of secular ethics in the classroom. For a lighter touch, we go behind the microphone and chat to stand-up comics about makin’ you laughit’s no laughing matter. We’re living on $2 a day to raise cash in the fight against poverty, looking into the murky world of third-party political advertising and revealing the most shonky sporting practices money can buy. We teach you to make jelly shots, take you to glorious India, school you on the craziest nonsense Youtube has to offer, chat with author extraordinaire David Malouf and offer you the chance to ride in a damn stunt plane.You’re welcome. So kick back and forget your troubles for a little while, because Bull’s taking care of everything. Love, The editors.
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PRESIDENT’S DESK DAVID MANN Hi Friends! Well it’s officially the end of summer! Those seeking warmth and shelter from the cold fear not - this month is a scorcher Bull issue and at the USU. My personal favourites for this month include the Wednesday Markets (4&18 May), our Eurovision Party (15 May), our very own Campus Culture Scavenger Hunt (18 May) and as always our famous weekly Tuesday Talks. Of course, the month of May brings the USU Elections, where you’ll be given a vote to decide who takes our 137-year-old student run organisation into the future. Check out the candidates in this month’s Candidate Booklet and take a good look at all 10 candidates. After you’ve done that come along to our Candidate Soapbox on May 10 (Manning Bar, 12:45pm) - watch them defend their policies and answer some very difficult questions! Fun for you! Not so fun for them! On 25 May, make an informed vote. In the meantime get to know the candidates and what they stand for. For those wanting to get a better look into the USU’s performance over the past year, come to our Annual General Meeting this month. In addition to providing you with the new USU Annual Report this will be a great opportunity to ask questions about what USU has been up to for the last 12 months. Importantly, last month we told you that the USU was re-entering informal discussions with the University to find out more about the proposed transfer of commercial operations. As we said then, the USU was very concerned with the proposed loss of independent revenue and student control by shifting to a direct funding model. While there is substantially more detail to be provided by the University, we will be providing our members a better view of these discussions and our concerns through our Union Board Blog this month, so jump online to www.yourunionboard.blogspot.com. Have a great month and enjoy this issue of Bull.
STUDENT PROGRAMS ALISTAIR COWIE In my last column I exhorted you all to get out and have a go... to take advantage of this fantastic point in your lives when you have opportunities thrown at you. One of the biggest of those opportunities is about to be played out in the form of the USU Elections. There are few more significant things that a person can do than to make a commitment to give something back to his or her community. Of course there may be some reflected glory, but there is also hard work, commitment, long hours and pain. Not everyone wants to be a Union Board director or a student Senate Fellow or an SRC office bearer. But there are many, many other ways that you can give back to your University community. Volunteering opportunities abound: you can tutor disadvantaged high-school kids, work in our art galleries, help out with Verge or O-Week. You can become a Club or Society executive. You can apply to direct O-Week, Verge, Tuesday Talks.You can take on internships or edit student publications. And there’s more to it than fun and experience and friends and (fleeting?) fame. Not everyone will become a Michael Kirby or a John Bell or an Yvonne Kenny or a John Howard or a Catherine Hamlin. But you can be a better student whilst having a better University experience. Studies show that involvement in co-curricular activities (i.e. stuff outside the classroom) is a predictor of improved academic performance, employability and post graduate earnings. Participating in these activities improves students’ cognition, interpersonal skills, communication skills and self-confidence. So check out Bull and the USU website and see what’s on. Get into it, be a part of it, and fly like the wind! Excelsior!
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BULL USUONLINE.COM COMPETITIONS
NSW Permit no. LTPM-10-00329
CAPTION COMPETITION
WIN A RIDE IN THE
RED BULL STUNT PLANE! Get set for the ultimate thrill ride in the official Red Bull Stunt Plane. Get a taste of the Red Bull Air Race right here in Sydney and experience necknumbing aerobatics at their most extreme. That’s right, we’re giving you the chance to zip up the jumpsuit, don some aviators and take WIN! to the skies!
WHY IT’S EVER SO SIMPLE! DISPLAY YOUR WIT WITH A FITTING CAPTION TO THIS PHOTOGRAPH AND TALLY-HO, YOU JUST MIGHT WIN, OLD BEAN!
So get cracking – send your ingeniously hilarious caption to usubullmag@ gmail.com include name and contact details.Winners will be notified by email and the winning caption printed in the next edition.
ISSUE 2 WINNER! Congratulations to “Put That Ball Down PATRICK MADDEN, winner of the Apple iPod and look at Moiiiii”. Touch!
WIN A $100 BIKE VOUCHER!
Thanks to Electric Velocity Cyclery, we have two $100 vouchers to give away to two lucky readers, to spend on any new bikes in the shop! Electric Velocity Cyclery offers special discounts to students. Located at 105 Regent Street, Chippendale, just a 10 minute walk from the University of Sydney. Budget brand new push bikes from $250. Got a puncture? Only $20 inclusive of the tube, and full service for $60*. Join the Electric Velocity Cycles group on Facebook. *All prices shown have been discounted exclusively for USU Access Members.
To enter the draw, simply send your name and details (email, phone number and favourite cycling song) to usubullmag@gmail.com
Entries for all competitions close 12 May 2011.
COMPETITIONS BULL_03v001.indd 6
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DON’T MISS THIS!
2 WEEK TRIAL GOLD GYM PASS * FOR $29 Enjoy unlimited use of all three of our on-campus facilities - giving you access to our indoor 50m heated pool, over 65 GROUP ĂžTNESS CLASSES PER WEEK MODERN WEIGHTS AND CARDIO EQUIPMENT INDOOR ROCK CLIMBING AND MUCH MUCH MORE
This offer is open to the entire community to enjoy, so contact US TODAY Promotional Period: May 2 - May 22, 2011 *Conditions Apply
$ROP IN TO THE Ă˜QUATIC #ENTRE Ă˜RENA OR (+ 7ARD call 9351 4978 or visit online www.susf.com.au BULL_03v001.indd 7
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BULL USUONLINE.COM WHAT’S ON
WHAT’S ON YOUR GUIDE TO THE PLACES TO BE ON CAMPUS. WE’LL GIVE YOU THE WHEN AND WHERE – YOU SHOW UP AND ENJOY. TO SEE EVERYTHING THAT’S GOING ON (AND THERE’S A LOT) VISIT WWW.USUONLINE.COM AND CLICK THE CALENDAR.
WEEK 9 TUESDAY 3 MAY KNITSOC AGM
12- 2pm, Sunken Lawns
TUESDAY TALKS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
601 AGM
4:30-6pm, Bodhan Bilinsky, Holme
THE LEPRECHAUN SOCIETY AGM 5-6pm, Manning
EGADS (ELECTRONIC GAMES AND ARTS DEVELOPMENT SOCIETY) IGM 5-7pm, Isabel Fidler, Manning
WEDNESDAY 4 MAY WEDNESDAY MARKETS
11am - 3pm, JFR Plaza
SUABE AGM
1pm, Drawing Office, Mech. Engineering
THURSDAY 5 MAY EDSW REVUE GM
10-11am, Reading Room, Holme
HUGH CORNWALL (OF THE STRANGLERS) 8pm, Manning Bar
FRIDAY 6 MAY WEEKEND WARM-UP AT HERMANN’S
SUSS AGM
7:30pm, Common Room, Holme
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EUROVISION PARTY
WEEK 11 TUESDAY 17 MAY
5-8pm, Manning Bar
HOUSE OF PAIN
8pm, Manning Bar
DJ SMURF
9pm, Hermann’s Bar
WEEK 10 MONDAY 9 MAY MNML MNDAYS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
TUESDAY 10 MAY USU ELECTORAL SOAPBOX
12.45pm, Manning Bar
WEDNESDAY 11 MAY LUNCHTIME SESSIONS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
HERMANN’S TRIVIA
7-10pm, Hermann’s Bar
QUEER REVUE SOCIETY GM
SUNDAY 15 MAY
WEEKEND WARM-UP AT MANNING
THE IGM OF THE MICROFINANCE CLUB
6-8pm, Reading Room, Holme
8pm, Manning Bar
6pm, Manning Bar
1- 2pm, Hermann’s Bar
4-6pm, Meeting Room 1, Holme
ALESTORM
4-7pm, Hermann’s Bar
DARCY SOC AGM
12-2pm, Isabel Fidler, Manning
FRIDAY 13 MAY
PROJECT 52
TUESDAY TALKS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
WEDNESDAY 18 MAY WEDNESDAY MARKETS
11am - 3pm, JFR Plaza
SCAVENGER HUNT!
11am-4pm, Margaret Telfer, Manning
HERMANN’S TRIVIA
1- 2pm, Hermann’s Bar
THURSDAY 19 MAY
WEEK 12 MONDAY 23 MAY MNML MNDAYS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
TUESDAY 24 MAY TUESDAY TALKS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
WEDNESDAY 25 MAY
USU ELECTION DAY ELECTION NIGHT PARTY
7.30pm, Hermann’s Bar
THURSDAY 26 MAY THEATRESPORTS
1-2pm, Manning Bar
FRIDAY 27 MAY WEEKEND WARM-UP AT HERMANN’S
THEATRESPORTS
4-7pm, Hermann’s Bar
WOMEN’S SOCIAL DRINKS
8pm, Manning Bar
1-2pm, Manning Bar 4-6pm, Hermann’s Bar
FRIDAY 20 MAY POSTGRAD MEXICAN FIESTA
6pm, Hermann’s Bar
THE HAUNTED
SATURDAY 28 MAY MORBID ANGEL
8pm, Manning Bar
THE BAMBOOS ‘10TH ANNIVERSARY SHOW’
WEEK 12 WEDNESDAY 1 JUNE
THEATRESPORTS
SATURDAY 21 MAY
11am-3pm, JFR Plaza
KIRBY CUP GRAND FINAL
8pm, Hermann’s Bar
THURSDAY 12 MAY 1- 2pm, Manning Bar 5-8pm. Withdrawing Room, Holme
8:30pm, Manning Bar
WEDNESDAY MARKETS
THE RHYTHM CELLAR
SOUND OF DUBSTEP TOUR FEATURING BORGORE 9pm, Manning Bar
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ISSUE 02 WHAT’S ON
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TOP PICKS SCAVENGER HUNT Wednesday 18 May, Margaret Telfer, 11am
USU C USU CAM MPUS CULTURE ULTURE 2011 111
Scav Sc aven enge nge ger r
Get out your maps and shovels – it’s treasure huntin’ time! Enter your team now into the USU’s Epic Scavenger Hunt – where you’ll be sent out to hunt down clues and rack up the points to win some amazing prizes. Be adventurous and get scavenging. awesome prizes for 1stt 2nd
Join group for more event details
*at least one person per team must have a camera phone or digital camera for proof of item completion
COMPETITION & APPLICATION DATES Show off some mad skillz and win some great prizes!
2012 O-WEEK DIRECTORS APPLICATIONS
Open: 23 Feb / Close: 06 May
T-SHIRT COMP APPLICATIONS
Online Voting: 02 to 13 May
MICHAEL KIRBY PLAIN SPEAKING COMPETITION
Open: 01 Mar / Close: 08 Apr
KICK START GRANTS
Applications Close: 06 May /03 Jun / 01 Jul
PALM AWARDS
Open: 02 May / Close 12 Aug
SHAVED GUERILLA: SECOND SEMESTER SHORT FILM COMP Theme Announced: 03 Jun
CALL FOR VERGE VOLLIES
25 Jul
Semi Final: 03 & 05 May Grand Final: 12 May
Awesome prizes plus free t-shirt & pizza for all participants. Registrations at 10-11am in Margaret Telfer, Manning on the day.
EUROVISION Sunday 15 May, Hermann’s Bar, 6pm Direct from Düsseldorf is a screening of the 2011 Eurovision song contest which sees Hermann’s Bar transformed into a European tavern, complete with European food and drinks. Run in conjunction with the USU’s European Clubs and Societies.
USU ELECTION DAY + ELECTION NIGHT PARTY Wednesday 25 May Party from 7.30 pm, Hermann’s Bar The polls are open – it’s time to vote! This year, the USU Board Elections will take place at a number of polling locations around campus (see usuonline.com for locations and times), and all voters will receive a $5 meal voucher (conditions apply). Once all the votes have been cast, Hermann’s Bar will play host to the official Election Night Party. Kicking off at 7.30pm, p , with free entertainment,, the Election Night g Party is the place to be when the results are officially announced.
Details correct at time of printing but may be subject to change. Please check www.usuonline. com for current details.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM FEATURE
PAUL KARP INVESTIGATES HOW THIRD PARTY ADVERTISING HAS SHAPED THE DEBATE ON PUBLIC POLICY REFORMS, LIKE THE MINING SUPER PROFITS TAX.
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I
t was May 2010. The Australian Prime Minister was a chap called Kevin Rudd and he had just unveiled the mining super profits tax. It was an attempt to get taxpayers a larger slice of the pie from the enormously profitable mining sector. All it took was some $22 million in political ads from the miners and a few bad polls for Labor before Kevin Rudd’s stint as Prime Minister was finished. It was another reminder that the power of advertising should never be underestimated.
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ISSUE 03 FEATURE
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“$22 million in political ads from the miners and a few bad polls for Labor… and Kevin Rudd’s stint as Prime Minister was finished.”
The advertisements focused on the importance of the mining industry in Australia, implying that a tax on the profits of this sector would have far-reaching effects on the whole economy: on consumer prices; on employment levels; on superannuation returns; and on foreign investment in Australia. Dr Ken Henry, then Treasury Secretary and author of the Henry Tax Review (which advocated such a tax), fronted the Senate Estimates Committee and declared that the tax would not raise prices. Dr Henry said in statements “that the mining industry saved Australia from recession are not supported by the facts,” since they shed 15 per cent of jobs in the industry during the global financial crisis. The idea of Australia harming its reputation as a safe investment was also dismissed by Dr Henry, as well as by academics like Professors John Quiggin and Paul Frijters of the University of Queensland. The Australian Electoral Commission’s political spending disclosures for 2009-2010 showed the $22 million campaign, which ran from May until Julia Gillard took over and negotiated a compromise on the tax in late June, was financed primarily by the Minerals Council of Australia, which spent $17.2 million, mainly
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on the high profile TV advertisements. BHP Billiton, meanwhile chipped in $4.2 million. Rio Tinto put in just over $537,000, and a smaller lobby group, the Association of Mining and Exploration Companies, provided a little under $274,000. When Ms Gillard’s compromise changed the tax to a ‘Minerals Resource Rent Tax,’ the expected revenue to be raised over a decade was slashed from $99 billion to just $38.5 billion - a staggering $60 billion difference. The ads were worth every penny, and then some. What impact do these ads have on public policy debates? Dr Peter Chen, media politics lecturer at the University of Sydney, says that the ads “have an important agenda setting affect.” “They may not convince people which side to take in a debate but do greatly influence which issues are important,” Dr Chen says. “Once the issue has been raised to a status of something that people think is important, a process known as priming, then governments have to respond within the frame that the ads have created for the debate.” In addition, the ads most likely contributed to the steady decrease in support for the tax registered by opinion polls over May and June 2010, because they were some of the most visible sources of information about the tax. Chen agrees that the ads were important in winning the concession of changes to the tax. The success of the campaign can partly be attributed to some own goals by the government. Firstly, because the Rudd government did not
properly consult with mining companies, they turned and directly appealed to the people, presenting it as a defensive move against the taxgrabbing government. Secondly, Kevin Rudd’s principled stance to limit the use of public funds for government advertising limited the ability of the government to respond. According to Dr Chen, “the sad lesson [was]… that unless you’re out there advocating your policy, someone else will frame the debate in a way you don’t like.” It was lesson that Kevin Rudd understood. The government responded with ads of its own. Principle was shelved and the Special Minister of State, Joe Ludwig, granted an exemption that allowed the government to spend close to $40 million defending the mining tax. But the damage was largely already done. The publicly-funded campaign became a story about Rudd’s broken election promise, and the ads themselves were entirely reactive, achieving little of the cutthrough of the miners’ ads they were designed to counter.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM FEATURE
It is by no means always the big end of town that attempts to influence voters’ decisions in this way. Unions, representing the collective interests of their membership, were influential in opposition to John Howard’s WorkChoices reform, as the ‘Your Rights At Work’ campaign was one of the most discernible themes of the 2007 election. Dr Chen is sceptical about the effect of this campaign because the Howard government and WorkChoices were both already unpopular. He argues that “because the visibility was so high, the ‘Your Rights at Work’ campaign got associated with successes, but there is debate around whether [the campaign] was as effective as claimed.” New media, such as the Internet, have brought opportunities for the little guy to run smaller insurgent campaigns to affect democratic decisions. Organisations such as GetUp (see box), Dr Chen argues, “while not able to drop a cool $10 million into a debate like the big miners can, nevertheless aggregate the influence of small contributors”. What they lack in buying power they make up for in novelty. Often traditional media will cover their efforts in what Dr Chen describes as the “earned media effect,” where publicity is created through advertising, which then sparks a news story. But don’t assume that democracy can always be so easily bought. Third-party advertising can fail as badly as any other campaign. A case in point is the campaign against plain-packaging of cigarettes waged by the coyly named Alliance of Australian Retailers. This group, flush with $5 million provided by the big tobacco companies, Philip Morris, Imperial Tobacco Australia and British American Tobacco, advertised throughout the
2010 Federal election and football finals seasons. The result was what Dr Chen calls a “total misfire,” a waste of money that proved that ads can fail entirely to shift the debate. Dr Chen attributes the campaign’s failure to the media’s ability to unpick the obvious attempt to conceal the identity of the interests behind it. The Alliance of Australian Retailers
GetUp, founded in 2005, is an independent community advocacy organisation giving Australians opportunities to get involved and hold politicians accountable on important issues. The organisation has a progressive leaning, and is structured around the ability of its members to sign up to various campaigns to express their interests and priorities in areas like social justice and environmental sustainability. GetUp spreads itself out to a number of political arenas, lobbying to ban third-party donations to political parties; to stop internet censorship; to allow gay marriage; to set more restrictive targets on greenhouse gas emissions; to end mandatory detention; to close the gap of indigenous disadvantage; and to end gender discrimination by demanding equal pay for equal work. GetUp mobilises its membership to attend rallies, phone politicians, donate money to pay for advertising – anything to influence public policy debates. GetUp also, engages in third party advertising to change public policy decisions. In particular, before the 2010 Federal Election they ran
TV campaigns against Julia Gillard’s climate policy and Tony Abbott’s views on abortion, the cervical cancer vaccine and the role of women in society. In total they spent nearly $1.5 million in advertising before the election which, although pale in comparison to the $22 million spent by the anti-super profits tax lobby, is quite a sum. Over $1 million of this money was contributed by six unions, effectively two-thirds of the advertising budget. The director of GetUp Simon Sheikh said that the donations were unsolicited but the motivations were explicable because “we’ve stood with the unions on workers’ rights and they are now standing with us… they also see us as an effective campaigning group.” Nevertheless, some of the advertising budget was contributed by individuals, more than 10,000 individuals to be precise. The structure allows members to support and fund particular campaigns, a somewhat more democratic practice than the direct intervention of big miners and unions into public policy debates with their own advertising. By aggregating the support of individuals, GetUp hopes to amplify those voices and give progressive causes more traction in these debates.
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“Unless you’re out there advocating your policy someone else will frame the debate in a way you don’t like.” was transparently an ‘astroturf’ organisation, confected by tobacco interests rather than a grassroots reaction of retailers as purported. Third-party advertising has proved potent in public policy debates. In all likelihood we’ll see more of it in coming political debates, as it is now seen as a cheap and necessary tool to defend rights or profitability of private interests. Dr Chen argues that decreasing journalistic and editorial standards are partly to blame. In an economic environment where traditional print media have to compete with new media like the internet, the drive is to produce news in a cheaper way and this means relying more on public relations material, distributed to promote or protect private interests. He cited a Queensland study in which it was found that in 2008 a staggering 55 per cent of news stories were primarily reliant on PR material - a huge increase from 20 per cent two years previous. With stakes as high as the 10-digit revenue figures of the mining or tobacco companies, it is understandable that industries are desperate to protect their interests. But without greater engagement and scrutiny of these self-interested campaigns, is it the public good that suffers?
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ISSUE 03 FEATURE
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WHY SO SERIOUS? ANNE WIDJAJA LEARNS THAT GETTING INTO COMEDY ISN’T ALWAYS A BARREL OF LAUGHS.
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“I’ve been on the road doing comedy for 10 years now, so bear with me while I plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time.” That’s how legendary comedian Bill Hicks once greeted his audience. Beneath the comic exaggeration, there was no doubt more honesty in that comment than most comics would like to admit. Anyone who has seen Jerry Seinfeld freeze on stage in his documentary Comedian, would realise that a career in stand up comedy isn’t as easy or as tremendously hilarious as it appears. Many try and many fail - so how do you transform being ‘the funny one’ into a professional career?
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BULL USUONLINE.COM FEATURE
S
educed by the lifestyle of the late night comic, American-Australian stand-up comedian Tommy Dean dropped out of university after his first year to pursue comedy full-time. “It was kind of a counter culture at the time, everyone else was getting up and going to work, and we were hanging out at cafes and writing jokes…tearing apart the world intellectually,” recalls Dean: “it was like uni without tests.” He soon discovered a career in comedy posed more serious challenges than simply getting used to the bohemian lifestyle. “Comedy’s sort of like tennis, if you play well, and win a few tournaments you can do
“I don’t have a problem at all with comedy that’s “too soon,” the key is that you have to be funny. You can do jokes about Japan…but ultimately there has to be a twist that makes it funny” - Steve Philp
well,” he says. “You can [always] survive on the Japanese circuit for a while... But, if anybody’s asking for career advice, it’s a dangerous way to make money.” Breaking into the entertainment industry is as much about making the right connections early on in your career as it is about talent. Getting to know promoters and befriending other comics can be the difference between being stuck in a perpetual circuit of open-mic clubs, and landing a five minute audience warm-up spot before a big act. Dean puts his own success down to time. “You go to the open-mic room, it goes well, you hang out, show that you’re interested, you get to know all the other comics,” says Dean. “It’s really a slow process of immersing yourself in the system... and you’re always competing for the job.” Comedian Steve Philp owes his success to a willingness to venture beyond the stage. “It’s pretty hard to make a living from just straight out comedy in this country,” explains Philp. “If I was just to do straight stand-up I might not
“The real definition of a professional comic is someone who can tell the difference between when the joke went wrong, or if the audience went wrong” - Tommy Dean
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ISSUE 03 FEATURE
be doing it [comedy] anymore.” Even though Philp was a successful stand-up (he reached the quarter-finals of American TV hit Last Comic Standing, performing to an audience of two million viewers), his impressive CV benefited from branching out into more mainstream comedic forms. Philp hosted the Saturday morning breakfast radio show on NOVA 96.9 for five years, and now warms-up the audiences of TV shows such as Ready Steady Cook, SoYou ThinkYou Can Dance and the NRL Footy Show. Steve admits that ‘selling out’ and diversifying to mediums such as TV and radio are not only a ‘nice break’ from hearing his own voice, but a necessary career move. Small-time stand-up comics rarely see big pay checks, so they need to snap up any job opportunities that come their way - good, bad or ugly. Philp explains the often humiliating circumstances comics must endure: “A friend of mine is doing these really bad TV ads for a car yard, and last week they threw an Easter bunny costume at him and said ‘get in that.’ I’ve done some stupid things… I don’t want to sound like I’m better than that, well, but I am.” And then there’s the comedian’s worst nightmare: bombing. But for Philp, even though he confesses that bombing on occasions may have tempted him to walk away, he simply couldn’t let it deter him long enough. “I kept going back to the acting stuff, and I couldn’t stop writing then. I wanted to do it again, it became a bit of a buzz,” he says. It seems surprising that those who ply a trade in being funny take their art so seriously.
Comedy on Campus MICHAEL HING, CAMPUS FUNNY MAN SHARES HIS EXPERIENCES DOING COMEDY AT UNI.
WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO GET INTO COMEDY? I think similarly to a lot of other people who are into comedy, I had kind of a semi-troubled childhood. Nothing serious or anything, just being a bit of a nerd, a bit of an outcast, I couldn’t really be the smartest or the fastest or anything, so to fulfil some innate need for attention I think I learned to be louder and more obnoxious than others. HOW DID YOU GO ABOUT STARTING HERMANN’S HEROES AND PROJECT 52? I started doing Theatresports when I was still studying, and that year,
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Turning casual wit into full-time performance requires pushing through a tough learning curve. Tommy Dean’s advice to amateur comedians is frank: “Know that you will suck for a long period of time, there’s just no way around that,” he warns. Although theories on humour have been around since Aristotle’s time, there’s no real formula for success under the unforgiving spotlights. Dean himself uses a degree of structure to write comedy, a method based on timing the all-important punch lines– or as he puts it: “pulling the rug from underneath them.” He also believes that the art can only be learnt from watching other experts in the field and studying the nuances. Philp, meanwhile, stubbornly refuses to watch any comedy, instead turning his attention to learning from his audiences. What both comedians agree on is what not to do. Both men lament the mistake that befalls most young comics, in relying too much on vulgarity, and borderline verbal abuse, to entertain the audience. “Some open-mic’ers seem to think that being offensive is the way to go,” says Philp. “Most of them mistake what they’re doing for therapy. They’re getting up there and just yelling at people.” He explains that it isn’t so much a matter of content, but of delivery. “I don’t have a problem at all with comedy that’s ‘too soon,’ the key is that you have to be funny,” he says. “You can do jokes about Japan… but ultimately there has to be a twist that makes it funny.” All entertainers must face the fact that they will always be at the mercy of their audience.
the Architecture Revue needed someone to direct it. I ended up doing it, with absolutely no qualifications or experience in sketch comedy whatsoever. That show ended up doing really well and a guy called Graham Bond, who’s an old school Australian comedian with ties to the Architecture Revue, put me in touch with a crazy old man called John Pinder, who people refer to as the godfather of Australian Comedy. Anyway, that led to us doing the Big Laugh Festival and the Melbourne International Comedy Festival back in 2007 with the help of the USU. When we got back, I kind of became interested in doing stand up, so we ran a fortnightly comedy night called Hermann’s Heroes at Hermann’s Bar. We’d pretty much given up by mid-2008, because it was just really, really difficult to get in quality. We realised that the only way we’d be able to guarantee ‘quality’ would be if we did it ourselves. And that’s kind of what Project 52 is.
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Facing a tough crowd is an experience that Philp knows well. From doing jokes on Bindi Irwin modelling for FHM, to dissing New Zealand in front of a group of patriotic Kiwi tree loppers, Philp has pushed his fair share of buttons. But nothing compares to a bombing on a gig on the high seas. “Gigs on a boat are bad because you can’t get off the boat,” he reflects. “It’s worse if you do a P&O cruise, because you have to eat with them every day, and they’re like, that’s the guy we hate.” Philp admits, though, that when an act goes sour “comics are pretty good at blaming everything else.” Dean, on the other hand, argues that it’s down to professionalism. “The real definition of a professional comic is someone who can tell the difference between when the joke went wrong, or if the audience went wrong,” he says. Comedian Julia Morris summed it up nicely when she once said that making it in comedy required “thick skin, or bad hearing.” Titanium-strength coping mechanisms are prerequisite for this job. Appropriately, Dean is not one to take his success for granted. “If a guy goes up to you at a gig and asks: ‘are you funny?’ well the real answer to that is: ‘well I have been before, and we’ll find out tonight whether I still am,’ it’s never for sure,” says Dean. “That’s part of the reasons why I love it, and that’s part of the reason why it can crush you.” You can catch both Dean and Philp at Happy Endings Comedy Club in Kings Cross.
WOULD YOU EVER TOUR PROJECT 52? We’re doing a few different shows at the Sydney Comedy Festival, as well as heaps of guest spots at other comedian’s shows this year. The problem is that no-one has any idea who we are outside of the little niche we’ve built. It just means a lot of hard work once you’re there at the festival. A lot of handing out flyers on the street, a lot of doing guest spots for free just to promote your show.
Michael Hing and Patrick Magee are now touring their act Hing and Magee Orientalism at the Seymour Centre on Thurs 28 - Sat 30 April. Tickets are onsale now from ticketek.com.
WHAT THE BEST AND WORST THING ABOUT PERFORMING AT UNI? There’s no question that for Project 52 we’re spoiled in terms of audience. We’ve been named the best comedy room in Sydney two years running now, and it’s because of the audience. They’re just smart, switched-on dudes and ladies. You go to other comedy rooms in Sydney, and if you don’t talk about your dick after 30 seconds they lose interest.
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for video and new media arts 2011
Ian Burns (AUS/US) David Haines (UK/AUS) and Joyce Hinterding (AUS) Rachel Khedoori (AUS/US) Jae Hoon Lee (KOR/NZ) Arlo Mountford (AUS) Charlie Sofo (AUS)
5 May – 10 July 2011 FREE ADMISSION Late opening every Wednesday until 9pm
Guest curator Justin Paton Updates & artist interviews: www.twitter.com/Unguided_Tours
ART GALLERY OF NEW SOUTH WALES ART GALLERY RD THE DOMAIN SYDNEY 2000 INFORMATION 1800 679 278
www.artgallery.nsw.gov.au Ian Burns Well Read 2010 (detail) Courtesy the artist, Anna Schwartz Gallery, Sydney and Melbourne, and Mother’s Tankstation, Dublin
MA ALE & FEMAL LE DIIABETIC VOLU UNT TEER RS REQUIRED STUDY TO EVALUATE THE SAFETY, TOLERABILITY AND EFFECTS OF A NEW DRUG IN DIABETIC PATIENTS WITH SLOW STOMACH EMPTYING.
People with diabetes commonly experience slow stomach emptying (a condition called ‘gastroparesis’). Slow stomach emptying can cause: • Nausea and vomiting • Bloating and feeling excessively full after a meal • Belly visibly larger • Loss of appetite • Abdominal pain or discomfort GSK is currently developing a new drug to treat delayed stomach emptying in people with diabetes. You may be eligible to participate if you: • Have Type I or II Diabetes Mellitus • Are male or female, between 18-80 (inclusive) • Have a minimum 3 month history of slow stomach emptying • Have any of the symptoms listed in the description You are NOT eligible to participate if: • You have a gastric pacemaker • Your diabetes is poorly controlled • If (females) you are pregnant • You are diagnosed with chronic liver disease
Our trial participants are reimbursed for their time, travel costs and inconvenience
More information CALL 1800 475 475 volunteers.4.trials@gsk.com Or visit www.gsk.com.au/mru
Prince of Wales Hospital Level 10, Parkes Building East High St. Randwick, NSW 2031
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This study has been approved by Bellberry HREC, Ref no: 2010-12-828 and operates within Australian & International guidelines for medical research MOT114479 Print Version 2, 16 February, 2011
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ISSUE 03 INTERVIEW
YOU TAUGHT ENGLISH AT THE UNIVERSITY OF SYDNEY FOR TEN YEARS UNTIL 1978. HAS THE UNI CHANGED SINCE THEN? Universities have changed so much… I wouldn’t teach in an English department in a university anymore. The things they teach don’t interest me, I’m not interested in the smallest degree in theory. I believe in a synoptic view of teaching literature - for example, if you were doing French literature, you’d do the whole thing. The idea these days is you choose some kind of aspect of literature, whether it’s Gender Studies or whatever, and that seems to me to be perfectly useless. The idea of leaving a university and saying you’ve done English or French or German without some kind of synoptic reading in that area, so you have no kind of context, seems to me to be complete nonsense, I just cannot understand.
YOU’VE JUST RELEASED THE HAPPY LIFE, A QUARTERLY ESSAY ABOUT HAPPINESS IN THE MODERN WORLD, BUT YOU’VE ALSO DESCRIBED YOURSELF AS ‘A FAIRLY SLOW WRITER AND AN EVEN SLOWER PUBLISHER’. IS THAT THE MOST WE CAN EXPECT FROM YOU FOR A WHILE? Yes… In the end, I was kind of uncomfortable with the quarterly essay. The deeper I got into it, the more I wished I had another six or 12 months to do more thinking about it. These days, people expect everything to happen too quickly. I think there’s an awful lot of rush about things these days. It’s partly technology; that people think that everything should happen quickly, but I really do think that things need to happen slowly. WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO YOUNG WRITERS STARTING OUT IN TODAY’S ENVIRONMENT? Fiction has become rather strange, because most fiction is geared towards a particular niche
NOVELS ARE INCREASINGLY JOSTLING WITH SELF-HELP BOOKS AND MEMOIRS FOR PEOPLE’S ATTENTION. AS A LITERARY AUTHOR, ARE YOU CONCERNED? People are fascinated these days by biographies. That’s one kind of knowledge, but fiction is something else. It asks you to use other qualities, to go to places where fact can’t take you, and in that it offers you something you can get nowhere else. I’m surprised by how often I’ve remembered something that involves some piece of understanding that I regard as valuable. My first thought is that that’s come to me from a real experience, and then I realise it’s come to me from some book, some novel I read as a kid. That piece of experience that has come to me through reading, that insight, is absolutely as real as the kind of understanding that comes through something that happens to you.
DAVID MALOUF
audience. The publisher wants to know: ‘who’s going to read this? Is it chick lit, gay lit, what is it?’ It’s all about selling. Writers get trapped by that. Once you’ve got yourself into that niche it’s almost impossible to get out. Other people are writing because they’re intrigued by something. They begin the book because they want to discover where it will take them, and hope that the reader will go through the same discovery or disturbance that leads to some kind of understanding. But most writing now is utterly professional and geared to selling, John le Carre and Stieg Larsson and writing like that. People begin these days by saying: ‘I’m going to be a writer’ at 18 or 19. Before that, you discovered you were a writer when you had written two or three books. It’d be great to say: ‘I’d really like to go to the school where Tolstoy learned to write.’ There’s no school you can go to.You discover it by doing it. Photo by Conrad Del Villar
A
lex McKinnon speaks to award-winning Australian author David Malouf about the importance of the three R’s (two of them anyway) and taking things slowly.
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“People begin these days by saying: ‘I’m going to be a writer,’ at 18 or 19. Before that, you discovered you were a writer when you had written two or three books.”
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BULL USUONLINE.COM FEATURE
THE ETHICS OF ETHICS
“Students can learn firsthand, if not how to be ethical, then at least how to think ethically.”
TEACHING MORALITY WITHOUT GOD
MARIA ADEAGBO DELVES DEEP INTO THE DEBATE OVER THE TEACHING OF ETHICS AND SCRIPTURE IN NSW SCHOOLS.
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he New South Wales Parliament has recently passed legislation, which finally unleashed the long-opposed scripturenemesis on NSW Public Schools. The name of this threat? Ethics classes.
Last year saw the introduction of a pilot ethics course, trialled in 10 NSW primary schools, including the inner west’s very own Haberfield Public School. The ethics classes are intended to be an alternative for parents who opt out of sending their children to the traditional Special Religious Education (scripture). It aims to prevent the situation whereby children are left colouring in, watching movies or twiddling their thumbs during the time allotted to scripture each week. Following a generally positive independent review, former Premier Kristina Kennelly rushed through legislation in December 2010 that approved the mass roll-out of the program in NSW primary schools. Keneally stated: “Parents who choose not to send their children to scripture classes have a right to see their children properly engaged.” In 2011, the program has expanded to include 90 classes across 57 schools and is steadily growing. The courses are run by an army of volunteers coordinated by Primary Ethics, a not-for-profit organisation established
by the St James Ethics Centre. Schools can choose to run the program, provided they can recruit qualified volunteers to hold the classes. Developed by Associate Professor Philip Cam, the 10 ethical topics for Year 5 and 6 students span a variety of areas. These include situational judgment scenarios like assessing fairness, and moral conflicts, such as ‘always telling the truth’ and ‘always keeping your promises. The course aims to teach through ‘dialogue and discussion’ - a tradition of philosophical inquiry that goes right back to Socrates. Indeed, the purpose of the course could be best surmised by Socrates’ famous epithet on the Primary Ethics homepage: ‘The unexamined life is not worth living.’ This emphasises that ethics classes are about learning about right and wrong, rather than simply prescribing strict ethical rules. The introduction of ethics classes continues to garner hostile criticism from opponents who believe that parents should not have to choose between sending their children to ethics or scripture classes. Many faith-based organisations have opposed the classes. These include the Anglican Church, led by the Sydney Archbishop Peter Jenson, the Australian Catholic Church led by Cardinal Pell and the Islamic Council of NSW. Of more immediate political significance is the election of the Barry O’Farrell Liberal Government. O’Farrell has consistently expressed opposition to the course. When the Education Amendment (Access to Ethics Classes) Bill was passed last year, the then-opposition stated it would repeal the act if elected. As
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ISSUE 03 FEATURE
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Nationals MP Adrian Piccoli said, “We don’t think that students should have to choose between special religious education… and ethics classes.” So with the issue still up in the air, the question remains: Is it ethical to teach ethics? Reverend Fred Nile MLC, formerly of the Uniting Church, broadcasted an ‘SOS’ in State Parliament to ‘Save our Scripture.’ Nile reveals the Church’s concern that Ethics, or in his view, “unethical navel gazing,” would be “an attack on scripture classes” designed to lure children away from scripture. This concern is not surprising given the statistics: scripture class attendance decreased by as much as 70 per cent in some pilot programs. Meanwhile, the Hon. John Hatzistergos presented the other side of the picture. He fronted parliament and stated, “I am not aware of any corralling of people outside scripture classes to go into ethics classes.” Rather, he argued, the course was designed to supplement the ethical education for those who for whatever reason decline to attend scripture. Similarly, Greens senator-elect Lee Rhiannon stressed the importance of diversity. “Public schools do best when they bring together the diverse range of world views that make up Australian society,” she said. Perhaps it should be noted that this is the same Lee Rhiannon who was forced to clean toilets as the only student not to attend scripture at Coogee Public in the early 1960s. Reverend Nile’s concerns don’t seem to take into account the religious denominations present in the surveyed area, as is illustrated by the fact that some classes decreased by only one student. This disparity can be explained by the location of schools. Marrickville, for instance, was considered one of the most vulnerable areas for an ethics ‘attack’ with the highest proportion of those claiming to have no religion according to the 2001 Census. The popularity of the ethics course would appear to be in direct proportion to the beliefs of the local population. In light of this, the Church’s concern that ethics would outright replace scripture appears unjustified, or at least misplaced. If those choosing to opt out of the scripture courses in favour of ethics do not possess the beliefs
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fundamental to the appreciation of the course, then perhaps ethics isn’t an ‘attack’ but rather an atheist alternative in the interests of equality. As then-Education Minister Verity Firth stated, “It’s not up to politicians to decide for them, [parents]… the Opposition’s position on this is simply an insult to parents.” On close examination, both scripture and ethics seek to instil the same knowledge, albeit by secular and religious routes. The teaching of scripture encompasses a range of religions and aims to instil good morals and citizenship through the study of Biblical texts. A member of the University’s Evangelical Christian Union, Timothy Lihou, summarises the objectives of his Primary School Anglican Scripture course as “the basics of Christianity: that Jesus was a real man, that he really did miracles, died and rose from the dead in order to save us,” all communicated through the study of the Gospel. While the objectives of this course may be very different from a non-denominational ethics course, the social implications of such an education are rather similar. When asked about whether he felt that the scripture course taught good morals, the Lihou responded, “Yes, but not morals for moral’s sake.” He believed the teaching of good morals was a by-product rather than a direct aim. “Through the teachings of Jesus you get a moral framework but the object of the teaching isn’t you should be good... the main aim is to teach the Gospel,” he said. Moral Psychology lecturer, Dr Luke Russell meanwhile explained that ethics is a sort of life lesson, giving students tools for developing an ethical mind. “Ethics is the branch of Philosophy that deals with morality,” he said. According to Dr Russell objectives of learning ethics is “to equip students with the ability and power to think for themselves about anything in life.” With over 10 years of research in this ‘moral’ minefield, Dr Russell cites the technical term for this generic thinking skill as ‘Intellectual Autonomy.’ “I’m not sure whether it would make them into morally better people,” he said. “It certainly wouldn’t make them morally worse... probably a nice introduction to philosophy.” While the course is not trying to train people to be morally virtuous, it does encourage them to think more deeply about morality and to assess their own views.
This is something that philosophy student, Christian Katsikaros, agrees with. “Moral instruction doesn’t need to be an intention of the course but hopefully it ends up happening [through the teaching of moral decisionmaking].” Ethics courses indirectly equip students with a sense of morality and arguably via more inquiry-based routes than scripture. Former Premier Morris Iemma once described Public Schools as the ‘home of universal values.’ The teaching of ethics side by side with scripture conceivably promotes deeper thinking about moral questions by students who would otherwise be sitting idle. While some question whether schools can or should teach such universal values, ethics classes offer to help nurture the ability to think deeply about the everyday moral choices that we all face. Ethics classes ultimately help young students develop the ability to transcend personal experience and explore more complex moral situations from another person’s perspective. Students can learn firsthand, if not how to be ethical, then at least how to think ethically. Ultimately the debate boils down to a question of choice. The election of a Liberal State Government may mean that this choice is once again taken out of parents’ hands. Although it remains to be seen exactly what move the Coalition Government will make, the swing of the political pendulum could spell the end of primary ethics. Oscar Wilde once said, “Morality, like art, means drawing a line someplace.” In NSW it seems that line might be drawn in primary school classrooms.
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ISSUE 03 FEATURE
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OF FAITH
A MATTER U
ni students have infamously short attention-spans. Even the most engaging lecturers struggle to fill a lecture hall, but today the Eastern Avenue Lecture Theatre is packed to the back. Despite the size of the audience, you could hear a pin drop; it’s so quiet if you close your eyes, you’d be forgiven for thinking it’s empty. The speaker, Rowan Kemp, couldn’t ask for a better audience; they listen in respectful silence, punctuated only by bursts of laughter at his jokes. He’s not a lecturer, though; Rowan is an Anglican minister. Today, he speaks about actively campaigning for God, and the 150 or so students who’ve turned up are almost all members of the Sydney University Evangelical Union (EU), the University of Sydney’s oldest, largest and most prominent Christian society.
ALEX MCKINNON EXPLORES THAT UBIQUITOUS PRESENCE ON CAMPUS – THE EVANGELICAL UNION.
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Most would be familiar with the Evangelical Union by now. The green ‘Jesus is Lord’ tees are as ever-present this year as the white ‘Is This Life?’ ones were last year, and the posters, sausage sizzles and outdoor meetings are seemingly everywhere. Their somewhat ubiquitous nature may give a hint at how big they are. In fact, to say the EU is ‘big’ is somewhat of an understatement. Sure, it has more than 600 members, but then so does Pharmsoc, and you’ve never heard of them. It has over 300 Facebook fans and 235 Twitter followers, but who doesn’t these days? The EU is on another level. It has 21 non- student staffworkers. It runs a first-year weekend away out at Stanwell Tops for $120 a pop. It has 13 faculty sub-groups, most of which are large enough to be Societies in their own right and some of them run their own weekend retreats. It has a week-long Annual Conference. In any one week, it runs two sausage sizzles, a workshop called Equip, three public meetings and around 80 Bible-study groups. It has its own podcast, website and book. It makes advertisements and posts them on its resident Youtube channel. It gives out free booklets, pamphlets and, of course, Bibles. This might all be a little baffling if, like me personally, religion was not a big thing in your family growing up. After all, we live in Australia, a secular country where turning the bible-thumpers away at the door is regarded almost as a national pastime. Almost one in five people listed ‘no religion’ in the 2006 Census and mainstream church attendance rates have long since passed being simply ‘low’. Priestly scandals have become so numerous as to be commonplace.Yet the EU is not only surviving,
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but thriving: big, organised and on a mission from God, literally. One of its founding doctrinal points to which all members ascribe, expresses belief in ‘the universal guilt and sinfulness of man since the Fall rendering man subject to God’s wrath and condemnation.’ This ain’t postmodern Christianity-lite, folks; this is old-school fire-and-brimstone and at Sydney Uni, it’s hot stuff. So what’s their secret? Why is the EU such a big deal? Is this part of something bigger? Some nation-wide boom in Evangelism among Australia’s youth? Not really.You could be forgiven for thinking so; the Australian Federation of Evangelical Students, of which the EU is a part, has a presence on 64 campuses around Australia. The name ‘Hillsong’ is now a byword for cashed-up, powerful young Pentecostalism; Hillsong’s arena-like churches at Baulkham Hills and Waterloo pull upwards of 20,000 people a week, and their CDs regularly top the ARIA charts. But muscular Christianity is hardly a new phenomenon in Australia. The Sydney University EU is 81 years old, and while at 600, its current membership is impressive, it’s a fair slight lower than the 1,000 or more it could boast back in the 1950s. According to the Census, Pentecostalism was taken up by 10,000 15-24 year olds between 1996 and 2006. That’s pretty good compared to the numbers the Catholic and Anglican churches are haemorrhaging, but out of Australia’s 2.5 million young people, it’s a drop in the ocean. So if local kids aren’t joining the flock, who is? The secret might lie with Australasian
“The EU's not only surviving but thriving: big, organised and on a mission from God.”
Christian Evangelical Students (ACES), the EU’s Asian-Australian sub-group. Religion in Australia might be on the wane, but Pentecostalism in China has exploded in recent years. There are now more Chinese Christians than members of the Communist Party. There are more than 10,000 international students at Sydney Uni, and the EU has capitalised on this brilliantly; ACES has over 150 members on Facebook, publishes Chinese-language Christian literature, and runs its own bible-study groups to better reach out to the international student set. Of course, this is not the whole story. The EU’s high visibility and motivated membership has as much to do with the efforts of the EU Graduates Fund as with the grassroots support it enjoys on campus. The Fund exists to raise money to finance the EU’s hiring of staff workers, who play a large part in the EU’s activities - small groups, public meetings and the like. The Fund solicits donations from former EU members who are now out in the world earning money. The system appears to be working well as the Fund’s operating budget in 2009 was a colossal $652,000. The Fund is listed as a charitable institution by the Australian Tax Office due to being a primarily religious organisation, granting it exemption from paying income tax and Fringe Benefits Tax, and entitling it to a range of exemptions on paying GST, including for fund-raising events. Interestingly, however, charitable works don’t rate a mention in the organisation’s description. The Fund describes its main goal as ‘to see Christian leaders formed for service in God’s Church,’ although according to Rowan Kemp (who, incidentally, is also CEO of the Graduates Fund), members are encouraged to participate in charity work inside and outside their local churches, as befits Christian doctrine. While it should be noted that none of this money goes to the EU itself (which, according to EU President Hugh Chilton, raises most of its money via “the willing generosity of EUers”), having 21 paid staff workers on hand is something most societies would sacrifice a goat for.
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At this point, it’s tempting to scream ‘conspiracy!’ and lump the EU in with Tony Abbott, Fred Nile, Steve Fielding and the other old white men of right-wing political Christianity, but doing so would be simplistic. To test the veracity of the EU’s claim of not endorsing any political party or ideology, I attended one of their meetings. I came out surprised; the meeting focused on politics in the run-up to the NSW election, but there was no mention of abortion, homosexuality, contraception or other typically ‘Christian’ issues. Nor was there mention of any political parties, much less endorsement or condemnation. No doubt some members have strong political opinions, but the EU does not, seemingly, attempt to influence them - except to encourage them, as the speaker, a former government official put it, to “love God in the ballot box”. The Evangelical Union asks its members to consider God in every aspect of life, no matter how everyday. It’s a message they take seriously. The EU kids are dedicated. Where other societies will scramble over each other for your Access number, joining the EU is a process of commitment - it takes a while before you’re a full member. As a result, there are very few, if any ‘casual’ EU members. Every member is seriously dedicated to what the EU is about, forming an army of loyal foot-soldiers to raise the society’s profile. Other campus societies may have a similar member tally, but none can inspire the kind of devotion the EU obviously can. Any society that can fill not one, but three lecture halls a week - every week - has some serious brand loyalty going. Joseph Daroczy of the Sydney Uni Atheist Society has his own interpretation of that. He believes that the EU, large as it is, manages to make itself seem more prominent than it is by “making a more public presence with louder public events, more bright shirts on streets and a permanent poster presence on every available noticeboard.” Brand saturation, in other words. Predictable as his counter-argument is, Daroczy has a point; the lecture halls are always full, but it’s a sea of green shirts in there. It could be that Kemp and the EU are simply preaching to the converted. So, the EU… grass-roots Christian revival? Or all heat and no light? Perhaps it’s somewhere in the middle.You’d be a bit daft to take as Gospel the word of either the true believer or the doubting Thomas in something both parties are so heavily invested in. If the EU hasn’t managed to sway a huge number of new converts, it has definitely mobilised and motivated those naturally disposed to their cause. As a society, its organisational skills are impressive, its marketing strategy savvy, its members keen and loyal. One thing’s for certain; don’t expect the colourful Jesus tees to fade away any time soon.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM.AU CAMPUS CHATTER
CAMPUS CHATTER I’M NOT A STALKER, BUT... TO THE MATT BELLAMY (MUSE) LOOK-ALIKE IN LAW LIBRARY, 1. I was listening to Map of the Problematique when I saw you 2. Please stop being such a distraction 3. Marry me? Supermassive Black Hole in my heart
TO THE SELF-OBSESSED LECTURER WHO SET HIS OWN (OVERPRICED) BOOK AS THE COMPULSORY READER, Constantly quoting yourself in class doesn’t reinforce your point, just your ego. Shit is going to get real come feedback time. Disgruntled TO THE GUY WHO ALWAYS WEARS THE SAME ADIDAS SHIRT IN MY ENGLISH SEMINAR, If I donated you a new shirt, would you wear it? Please say yes. I worry. Sartorially concerned TO THE HOT GUY WHO SLEEPS AT SCITECH, I’d be your pillow any day. Seriously, I’m more attractive than your gf. Homewrecker TO MY TEMPTING TUTOR, How can I focus when my concentration lies somewhere between your luscious locks, your enthralling eyes, and your heavenly hands? Never mind what alliterative descriptions lie concealed beneath your desk. Enjoying English TO MY ANCIENT GREEK LECTURER, A kilt, fashionably worn, excites and stimulates the learning experience. Wink, wink! Plato fan TO THE GIRL WHO REFUSED TO GIVE A GUY A HOT CHIP AT MANNING, I appreciate your way of living. Coffee sometime? Let’s go Dutch. Fellow tightarse TO THE HIPSTERMANIAC WHO CATCHES THE 178 IN TO UNI, thank you for making life that much more entertaining. Your doting observer DEAR FIRST-YEAR HIPSTER GIRLS, Stop checking your reflections out as you walk past Eastern Ave. It’s glass, not a mirror. I can see you adjusting and you look foolish. Unimpressed
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TO THE MANNING BARBECUE, A haiku: My life is empty. Last week I had a salad. Please return to us. Seriously, get the friggin’ thing up and running TO THE LOUD SOCIALIST KIDS OUTSIDE FISHER, Could I get an ETA on the revolution? Only you’ve been saying it’s coming for a while, and I have a schedule break to plan. Ayn Rand enthusiast TO EVERY PERSON WITH A NEW IPAD 2, Really? Really? You had to have one now? Not in two weeks when the price will drop, now? Couldn’t wait? Steve Jobs could release a turd on a stick and you’d lap it up, you knobs. Luddite TO DAVE GROHL, I don’t care if you’re an older, shaggier, chubbier version of your former self. Awesome stays awesome. Fellow aging rocker TO THE FOOL IN FISHER WHO WOULDN’T LET ME BORROW A BOOK BECAUSE MY CARD WAS BENT, Joke’s on you, lady, I hid the thing under a shelf anyway. Find it now. Bookworm
SOMEONE CATCH YOUR WANDERING EYE? SOMEONE ANNOY THE HELL OUT OF YOU? SOMEONE MAKE YOU LAUGH DERISIVELY? LET US KNOW AND SEND YOUR MESSAGES TO:
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21/04/11 11:54 AM
ISSUE 03 CAMPUS CHATTER
NAAZBANO SCHONBERGER GOES ON A DATE… FOR THE LAST TIME.
GOT BEEF WITH SOMETHING? SPILL YOUR GUTS IN 400 WORDS OR LESS TO USUBULLMAG@ GMAIL.COM
PLEASE, HAVE A COW Friday night. Surry Hills: Mr New Guy makes a point of verbally expressing, almost constantly, how much he wants to sleep with me. The regret begins to sink in… Why on earth did I accept this date? More than 85 per cent of his mental energy is consumed by worries concerning either his muscle definition or complexion. He queries for the eighth time whether we’ll end up in bed at the end of the night. I giggle faintly, chug down my glass of wine and avert my gaze. Yet, it isn’t the incessant pestering I find to be outrageous, but his argument for getting me into the sack: “You’re just my type of girl, physically.” Well, thanks for the clarification, buddy. For a second there you had me thinking you
W
elcome to Bull’s Variations on a Scene, where we encourage YOU to get your creative writing skills out and help evolve our story. It’s simple; read the current edition’s story and take one element of it – be it an object, setting, character, theme etc - and submit your own creative piece. Here is the first instalment – now you take it from here! EMAIL YOUR STORY VARIATIONS TO USUBULLMAG@GMAIL.COM STORIES CAN BE NO LONGER THAN 300 WORDS...
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were a decent human being. The incident gets me thinking about the entire premise of compliments and how infuriating the manner in which people utilise them can be. How could this guy think that telling me how attractive he finds me would aid him in his endeavour? Why would I care what I look like? I’m not the one that has to sleep with me. Is society so perverted that individuals need reassurance from others to fuel an unrelenting self-obsession? Saying that I’m ‘your type of girl’ with specification made solely to my physical attributes is offensive and shallow. A person is not a collection of entities that can be individually pursued. His ‘compliment’ presumes my self-esteem to be so low that I
need approval from others to feel secure in myself. Even if I were that self-doubting, I wouldn’t be so stupid as to think that sleeping with someone because they like my tits is gonna make me any less so. As a child I was introduced to Narcissus, but I wasn’t aware of just how well I would get to know him. Everywhere I go I seem to be blinded by the angry flashing of mirror-finish screen protectors. This horrendous sign of vacuousness sits amongst many others, and magnificently presents to us the paradox of Narcissus: he perished in the face of his own image because he trusted no other to love him. The date actually wrapped up quite quickly after all that. Needless to say, we had sex.
VARIATIONS ON A SCENE ELIZABETH MORA
Mayra drew the curtains and turned away. She knew what had actually happened- she knew why. Mother, he had told her, I am doing this because no-one but myself can take the hurt away. She had not protested. Yet somehow, she knew she couldn’t anyway. He was merely her son - ‘She’ was merely his wife - and up until this moment, she had never been invited inside his world. Perhaps this was the reason why she just let him do it. She was nearing the end of her life and could say nothing to her son that demonstrated, in their many years apart, that she had changed and most importantly that she had thought of him - she wanted to be good again, even if it was too late and even if it meant compromising herself. She took out a light, stretched it across the cigarette hanging from her mouth and inhaled. Finding the nearest armchair, she sat.
Deep down, she knew that her son had not killed his wife because she had decided to give up their child. She knew that his motive was not this, but rather that his wife had robbed him of the chance of being the father, the mother he so desperately wanted but had never had. Loss spoke to him in a way that she would never understand and in this sense, she recognised the partial if not total ownership she held over her son’s guilt. As she heard the door open, her son called out to her- this was her cue. She got up, burnt the cigarette under her foot and began to walk towards him. Before taking his gloves off, he handed her the gun. She reached out and grasped it in her bare hands. Her fingerprints were now visible, and from this point, they always would be.
21/04/11 11:54 AM
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BULL USUONLINE.COM.AU FEATURE
“Dan was at first relieved that he had survived the night, before the blinding terror washed over him as he peered up at the Ivan Milat look-a-like kicking him in the ribs.”
A LITTLE TASTE OF
MELISSA WERRY TIGHTENS HER BELT FOR THE GREATER GOOD.
POVERTY BULL_03v001.indd 28
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ISSUE 03 29 FEATURE
F
him a bag of pastries, gratefully or five days this May, I will be received by his growling stomach living off $2 a day. Each day, I despite the prehistoric use-by date. A staff member of the Sydney will have nothing but a gold coin University Evangelical Union, with which to feed myself. This is Dan said his Live Below the Line experience revolutionised his faith not because student life is taking its He recalled chatting toll (though employment would be a inwithChristianity. a homeless woman on a park welcome addition to my life), rather, bench, who asked him the question often discussed in the abstract: on some giddy impulse I signed-up to “How can God exist when there is much suffering in the world?” the Oaktree Foundation’s ‘Live Below so Here was a woman who knew that the Line’ campaign, which raises funds suffering was so much more than failing an assessment or dropping for teacher training and education an iPhone; the question took on a programs in Papua New Guinea. whole new meaning for Dan. My family tells me this is the most selfish decision I have ever made; their exposure to my ferocious mood swings, traditionally experienced in the few minutes between the alarm going off and the coffee machine warming-up, will now be a five-day-long affliction. Since my decaffeinated alter-ego makes Miranda Devine look like a sweetheart, I better enjoy my family’s ‘unconditional’ love and an untarnished criminal record while I’ve still got them. Hopefully, though, the wider social benefits of the Live Below the Line campaign will outweigh the havoc I will undoubtedly wreak upon society in my deprived state. While the campaign aims to raise funds for overseas projects through sponsorship, an equally important goal is to promote a deeper level of awareness at home. We should all know the facts: three billion people live on less than the equivalent of $2 a day; 25,000 children under the age of five die every day from preventable disease; 885 million people have no access to clean water… poverty produces some scary statistics. But numbers don’t hit home in a culture whose biggest food conundrums between your mum’s delicious bread and butter pudding and the will to fit into skinny jeans. Considering the average Australian household bin contains over five kilograms of food wastage, spending a week living on the extreme poverty rate will make the realities of hunger – felt not over hours over meals, but days – so apparent in a cushy culture of over-consumption. In 2010, University of Sydney graduate Dan Kiat decided to get out of his comfort zone. Seeking as authentic an experience of poverty as is possible, Dan took to the streets. He imposed upon himself a $2 budget to cover not only food, but every other living expense, including transport and accommodation. Not even sure whether what he was doing was legal, his mother’s distressed voice ringing in his ears, Dan spent a nerve-racking first night on the tiles of Sydney’s Central Station. When he woke up to the boot of a heavily-tattooed, six foot burly stranger, Dan was at first relieved that he had survived the night, before the blinding terror washed over him as he peered up at the Chopper look-a-like kicking him in the ribs. Luckily for Dan, the man was kindly offering
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Other realisations hit Dan during his week below the line. As his concerned friends implored him not to go through with the challenge and offered him shelter and couches, Dan felt the power of empathy in the face of poverty. It’s natural to feel apathetic towards the world’s neglected and malnourished simply because their plight is so far removed from our fortunate reality of flowing water and energy drink samples. “My friends were worried about me, because they know me,” said Dan, “but I thought, ‘this is what a billion people go through all the time, there’s a billion people who could be my friend.”’ Twenty-year-old Joanne Wong comes from a family of food lovers. Accustomed to restaurant-quality meals at the family dinner table presented by Papa Wong, a retired chef – Joanne’s $2 daily budget was quite an eye-opener. The Live Below the Line challenge gave Joanne a chance to reflect on our culture’s excess and consumerism. “We eat for emotional reasons or simply for pleasure,” said Jo, “but your body doesn’t actually need that much fuel to run.” The greatest test for Jo, having grown up with the luxury of school lunches from the family restaurant, was the lack of variety imposed by a $2 budget. “I got so bored of eating the same thing every day,”
The Oaktree Foundation is Australia’s largest entirely youth-run organisation. Founded in 2003 by former Young Australian of the Year Hugh Evans, the Oaktree Foundation is now a movement of 57,000 Australians, with 350 volunteer staff all under the age of 26. With projects in places like Papua New Guinea and East Timor, and government lobbying and advocacy campaigns back home, the Oaktree Foundation is young people working together to end global poverty. Go to livebelowtheline.com.au ortheoaktree.org to find out more information.
Jo remembered, “and I realised just how much food affects your mood!” As she geared up for her second stint below the line this May, Jo suggested some strategies for surviving the week. “Plan a menu in advance,” she said. “The worst thing you could do is rush out and stock your cupboard with a hundred packets of Mi Goreng,” which is probably the first thing that comes to a student’s mind, where culinary deficiency and laziness combine to make microwave dinners a staple. But if you’re going to survive without being spotted licking the moss from rocks in Hyde Park or sneaking dry biscuits from the neighbour’s dog’s bowl, you’ll need real nutrition. This year, several top food bloggers are getting on board and creating some innovative $2 recipes; just don’t expect pistachio macaroons. Dan was still alive after a week on the floor in Central Station; Joanne still had friends after a week of low blood sugar and mood swings. I suppose I can survive the week without my precious caffeine. At least that’s a whole week off hipster-battling in the infinite line for Campos Coffee, and a few bucks saved. The question is, are you up for the challenge?
“WE EAT FOR EMOTIONAL REASONS OR SIMPLY FOR PLEASURE… BUT YOUR BODY DOESN’T ACTUALLY NEED THAT MUCH FUEL TO RUN.” - JOANNE WONG
21/04/11 11:55 AM
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ISSUE 03 STUDENT LIFESTYLE
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Vacation Education PHOTOS BY JON COLLINS
MARGY HINDER GOES ON A GEOGRAPHY FIELD TRIP AND EMBRACES THE DIVERSITY OF INDONESIAN CULTURE.
L
eft to my own devices, my first trip to Indonesia would probably have skipped coffee plantations, homestays with rice farmers or even my favourite expedition, a boat trip to islands off the port of Makassar. However my trip to Indonesia was not your typical Aussie backpacking, it was a month spent with 25 other students on the AsiaPacific Field School.
The School, led by Dr Jeffrey Neilson through the University of Sydney’s Geoscience Department, brings Australian and Indonesian students together to study rural economic development and resource management, firsthand. This summer our group went to two of THE INDONESIAN VIEW “Anxious and excited. Those two words were hanging around our heads. Anxious because we’d never studied with overseas students before and excited because this would be the best opportunity for us to improve our English and share local knowledge. Despite some moments of culture shock and misunderstandings during the trip, our experiences with the University of Sydney students were really amazing.” Emir Hartato
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Indonesia’s major islands, Java and Sulawesi before finishing in Bali. In Java we did the usual touristy things - visiting the capital Jakarta and national monuments, but we also toured AUSAid’s office in Jakarta and studied the management of the land surrounding Java’s main river system. There was a fairly significant variety of places, from dams, to sulphur lakes, to interviews with rice farmers, forestry officials, and tours of tea plantations. We stayed at Universitas Indonesia and studied with Indonesian students on their campus, which is so gigantic, the University provides free shuttle buses because walking between faculty areas is genuinely impractical. I later learned the reason for the size stemmed from the Suharto regime, which realised that university campuses were often the initial site of civil unrest, and tried to discourage collaboration by fragmenting the student population. On the island of Sulawesi, we teamed with students from Universitas Negeri Makassar (State University of Makassar) to observe how local tourist sites are managed. Among the attractions were a butterfly valley called Bantimurung, caving/ mountain expeditions and treks to local islands and historical sights of Makassar. Coming from Australia, I would never have appreciated how superior a dodgy-looking fishing boat was to a Mercedes-Benz coach. Indonesians conceptualise the sea as joining together rather than separating the 17,508 islands, and once you’ve experienced it, it makes perfect sense. Boats remove the necessity of using winding, bumpy roads and dealing with Indonesia’s loud and chaotic traffic. Next we visited a region called Toraja, known for its coffee, elaborate architecture and funeral ceremonies. We also dropped by a proposed World Heritage-listed village.
We did a two day homestay there with local students from Universitas Kristen Indonesia (Indonesian Christian University of Toraja) and carried out individual project research. We then visited a Mars Cocoa Clinic in Palopo and caught first-hand glimpses at the results of coffee certification, fair trade chocolate and development programs. There were pleasant surprises, such as the extremely high level of social and environmental conscientiousness, but also disappointments, like the apparent failure of microcredit programs. After two years of studying theories, frameworks and models, it was exciting to see that our learning was focused on actions and that their consequences were what mattered. We ended our trip in Bali, where our bogan-ness was put to shame by the Australian tourists. We visited a Balinese university and local water temples to understand their religious importance and how they were traditionally used to determine how water would be used in the local community. We studied the local Indonesian population and the regulation and management of the natural resources that their livelihoods depends on. It wasn’t your typical trip to Indonesia, but for the wonderful people I met, the countless anecdotes I now have to tell, and the endless karaoke, I will be forever grateful.
STUDENT LIFESTYLE 21/04/11 11:55 AM
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21/04/11 11:58 AM
ISSUE 03 TRAVEL
COUNTRY INDIA
HONKING IS A WAY OF LIFE In Sydney, when someone honks at you in the traffic, it’s usually a road-raged Volvo driver. In all major Indian cities, honking is a kind of collaborative urban orchestra - people actually brandish bumper stickers with the slogan ‘please sound horn’. If you can’t stand this type of aural cacophony, invest in a pair of earplugs, but the best advice is, if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. It makes for great stress relief!
I
ndia is gorgeous. Famous for its scenic countryside and lively, bustling cities, each bit of the nation’s rich, colourful history is woven into not only its marble palaces and sandstone forts, but every street corner and every home. But stepping into a land so foreign can be a massive culture shock for many, with a whole new set of social norms to absorb. So here’s a quick guide on how to traverse the wild landscape without getting eaten alive.
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BEWARE OF THE ANIMALS
MARKETPLACE HAGGLING IS A FINE ART Tourists are easy targets for epic rip-offs in Indian bazaars. So what’s the best way not to pay 200 rupees for that 20-rupee sari/sword/ hookah that caught your eye? Try not to be too obvious a tourist: learn a bit of Hindi. Phrases like: ‘Kum dham karo! Chalega!’ (Come on! Reduce the price!) will get you far. Also, draw a line at how much you’re willing to spend; even if the merchant swoops down on you like a vulture, chances are at least one of the 100 other stalls has the exact same item for a different price. Practice, practice and practice will transform you from a finger-painter of the haggling world to a Rembrandt. But remember: your rupees could be putting dinner on the table for the seller’s kids, so play nicely.
The stray animals are nothing like Baloo from The Jungle Book. When they look at you, they see a walking slab of tasty meat. Okay, slight exaggeration; nonetheless, there’s a litany of horror stories concerning these creatures. It’s no petting zoo out there, don’t make eye contact with raging bulls unless you want to be chased through the town, and don’t throw rocks at wild monkeys because that’s just asking for it.
FOOD POISONING IS AVOIDABLE There isn’t a more effective way to ruin a great holiday than by spending it on the toilet. So how can you call a truce with your digestive system on your trip? Firstly, treat it to a trustworthy brand of sealed bottled water and never, ever consume tap water. Secondly, as for food – if you’re staying at four or five star hotels, you’ll get served up some pretty great room service. There will also be a fair number of reputable restaurants around town for any backpackers. But if you’re planning to eat on the streets, as a general rule, don’t, unless the chow’s cooked fresh. And finally, fish is not your friend.
GETTING AROUND Most cabs, or ‘auto-rickshaws,’ in the cities nowadays are metered and offer rate charges based on the distance travelled. Don’t haggle for cabs – you’ll get a fair price going by the meter.
Into the Land of the Maharajas LASYA CHITRAPU TRAVELS INDIA.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM HEALTH
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HEALTH I
remember my first night out. It was Britpop Night at the Abercrombie Hotel or, as it was affectionately known, the ‘Stabbercrombie,’ (due to the rather high likelihood of an aggressive, singleted gentleman taking offence to your brushing past him and expressing his dismay by cutting you with something). Happily, my Sydney nightlife debut was unmarred by any such incident; but then again it’s not that I can remember anything in the first place, as it was also the night I was introduced to Jägerbombs.
What’s Your Poison? ALEX MCKINNON GETS WIRED ON ALCOHOLIC ENERGY DRINKS.
HOW CAFFEINE WORKS: Caffeine – the wondrous drug consumed daily by most of us, works by doing a bit of chemistry in your brain. First it mimics adenosine, which is the natural ‘chill out’ chemical, and binds with the adenosine receptors – effectively preventing you from feeling drowsy. Even though your body may be tired, caffeine stops your brain from doing anything about it. The second main effect of caffeine is an increase in dopamine in your brain, which heightens feelings of well-being and mood. It’s this effect that makes caffeine so addictive – and makes that first cup of coffee in the morning so damn good.
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For the uninitiated few, a Jägerbomb is a shot of Jägermeister dropped (bombed) into Red Bull which, according to the warning on the can, should not be consumed more than twice a day. I had somewhere in the region of nine. I was fine, although I walked home with the speed of a hummingbird and the balance of a crash-test dummy. (Hi mum!) Energy drinks are absolutely everywhere these days. On billboards, Formula One cars, being handed out from the backs of utes by bleached-blonde gymrats who call you ‘brah’. That kind of promotion doesn’t come cheap, but it doesn’t have to - the energy drink market is worth over $10 billion worldwide. Energy drinks hit it big in Australia back in 2002, when V and Red Bull dominated the market until the release of Mother in 2006. Sales of Mother languished for 18 months, mainly because it tasted like crap. Cleverly though, Mother released a 500ml can, double the then-standard energy drink size. It worked, and Red Bull and V soon followed suit, as well as the many, many other entrants into the market. It’s impossible to know how long it took before someone added alcohol to energy drinks, but based on human nature it’s probably in the region of eight seconds. Mixing energy drinks and alcohol has long been a feature of a big night out - as natural as making guns with your hands when MIA’s ‘Paper Planes’ comes on. It’s easy to see why the combination is popular. Alcohol is a depressant- it makes you sleepy. Combined with an energy drink, the sleepiness is submerged beneath the buzz of caffeine hitting your system, leaving only happy good-time feelings.
“It’s impossible to know how long it took before someone added alcohol to energy drinks, but based on human nature it‘s probably in the region of eight seconds.”
However, it’s the popularity of mixed drinks like Jägerbombs that has health experts all a-flutter. Even by themselves, energy drinks pack a wallop- the big brands usually contain between 100 and 120 milligrams of caffeine per can, compared with the 35 milligrams from a can of Coca-Cola. Mixed with booze the side-effects abound. For one, they make you feel less drunk than you actually are. Fatigue is one of your body’s subtle ways of telling you you’ve had enough to drink - without it, your perception of your own sobriety becomes skewed. When the caffeine and sugar high wears off, your postponed sleepiness comes back with a vengeance, leaving you doubly woolly-headed. Also, both dehydrate you quickly, so if you’re indulging, lots of water wouldn’t go astray. Don’t feel too bad about your cheeky Red Bull and Vodka, though. It doesn’t come close to Four Loko, a premixed behemoth combining the equivalent of four beers, three cups of coffee, large amounts of taurine and guarana in a single, massive 670 millilitre can. Four Loko was forced to remove everything but the alcohol in 2010 by the Food and Drug Administration, but hordes of Four Loko fans stockpiled the drink before it went off shelves, and it now retails online at black-market prices. Where was it available? Only in America.
21/04/11 11:59 AM
ISSUE 03 FOOD & BOOZE
LEWIS D’AVIGDOR GETS WOBBLY.
Are you ready for this jelly?
I
n 1862, Jerry Thomas, the grandfather of cocktails, provided a recipe for ‘Punch Jelly’ in How to Mix Drinks, aka The Bon Vivant’s Companion. Combining liquors with gelatins, Thomas wrote: ‘This preparation is a very agreeable refreshment on a cold night but should be used in moderation; the strength of the punch is so artfully concealed by its admixture with the gelatin that many persons, particularly of the softer sex, have been tempted to partake so plentifully of it as to render them somewhat unfit for waltzing or quadrilling after supper.’ Amen, Jerry Thomas, patron saint of all things cocktail. Amen. Many poor, yet enterprising, students who try their hand at jelly shots can take heart from Thomas’ wise words. Don’t feel ashamed when your cheap vodka and Aeroplane jelly crystals leave you with a watery mess. As Thomas’ recipe demonstrates, people have struggled to get their jelly concoctions to set
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for at least 150 years. The humble jelly shot is an art form: difficult to master and a nuanced, potent brew. According to bartender Aaron Shuttleworth from The Hunky Dory Social Club in Darlinghurst, jelly shots offer unique and fun challenges for bartenders to wow their clientele. “While jelly is not experiencing the resurgence that classic cocktails currently are, bartenders are constantly seeking new ways to impress their patrons and get them to try something they usually wouldn’t,” says Shuttleworth. “Anything with jelly in it is a good place to start because seriously, who doesn’t like jelly?” Indeed, jelly shots evoke nostalgic childhood memories, confusingly combined with that young adult taste for cheap and fun alcohol. Step aside goon bags and Passion Pop! Shuttleworth offered some secrets behind the perfect jelly shot...
FOOD & BOOZE JELLY SHOT 101 FOR THE SIMPLE
VODKA JELLY
INSTRUCTIONS
(The home brand version. Let’s face it, this is probably the only one that you’re likely to make.) Sachet Jelly 100ml Boiling Water 300ml Vodka
FOR THE BRAVE
DON’S REVENGE Sachet green jelly 200ml boiling water 300ml blanco tequila (Herradura, Don Julio) Garnish with Tabasco and lime juice to taste.
FOR THE TAME
JAPANESE PIRATE Sachet blue jelly 200ml boiling water 250ml dark rum (Appleton Estate, Mount Gay, Havana Club) 50ml Yuzu Juice (Japanese citrus)
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For each, add the boiling water to the jelly crystals. Allow to cool momentarily (you wouldn’t want the alcohol to evaporate!) then add the rest of the mixture and stir. Pour into jelly shot containers (plastic is best), or a punch bowl and let set in the refrigerator for a few hours.
OR THE ADVENTUROUS
RUMWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW Sachet yellow jelly 200ml boiling water 250ml overproof rum (Holey Dollar, Wray and Nephew) 50ml apricot brandy Handful cardamom pods (soaked & strained)
“The humble jelly shot is an art form: difficult to master and a nuanced, potent brew.”
HOW TO CONSUME (EAT? DRINK?) Thought ratios were hard? It’s only once the jelly shot is successfully made does the real challenge begin. Imbibing a jelly shot is about as laborious and painful as extracting a sea urchin from its natural habitat with your tongue. Unless you have a tongue longer than Gene Simmons, don’t attempt to suck it out. Either boldly break the plastic shot glass, even if that means consuming shards of plastic, or use a spoon or finger. Although the aim of most jelly shot enthusiasts is probably to get raucously inebriated we don’t condone binge drinking and recommend Jerry Thomas’ advice to remember: waltzing and quadrilling is always more enjoyable than lying on the floor. That said, it is time for a jelly shot renaissance, so go forth and resurrect this centuriesold practice.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM ENVIRONMENT
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SPORT MONEY
BAD APPLE
KEY
4. CALCIOPOLI: FOOTBALL
UNDERWORLD INFLUENCE
SINISTER NETWORK
DODGY OFFICIALS
The fix is in MICHAEL COUTTS DISHES THE DIRT ON 5 OF THE DODGIEST PRACTICES IN SPORTS BETTING.
M
atch-fixing is old news. Underneath that tiny tip of the rorting iceberg is a huge world of scams and trickery that everyone from criminal figures to players, referees and coaches have used to turn an otherwise innocuous game into a multimillion dollar pay-day. When they’re strapped for cash, sports fans around the world will do anything for a get-rich-quick scheme. Here are five of the worst:
1. SPOT-FIXING: CRICKET Cricket lends itself to rigging more than any other sport because you can bet on anything in it. How many runs will be scored by a team, each player, off an over, or off each ball - the list goes on. ‘Spot-fixing’ is simply paying a player a bucket-load to perform a certain act, then betting heavily on it. In 2010, two Pakistani bowlers, Mohammed Asif and Mohammed Aamer, were found guilty of spot-fixing after they bowled noballs at a particular point in their match against England, as predicted (and boasted about) by suspected match fixer Mazhar Majeed. This prompted a worldwide crackdown by the International Cricket Council’s Anti-Corruption Unit. The resulting investigations produced many suspects but insufficient evidence to charge anyone, meaning several spot fixers are probably still playing. Some say Pakistan’s four dropped catches off India’s Sachin Tendulkar in the World Cup semi-final may have been more than luck…
2. POINTS-SHAVING: BASKETBALL Basketball’s fast pace and high scores make betting on victory margins a hugely popular option for punters. The point spread, as it is called, can easily be influenced by a single player missing shots or defending poorly. ‘Points-
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shaving’ is where players intentionally ‘shave’ the points spread down by playing badly. In 1979, underworld figures bribed several Boston College players to deliberately reign in the team’s scoring against opponents they were expected to flog. Mafia bosses aren’t the only ones in on the points-shaving craze though: referees love getting in on the action too. In 2007, the NBA was rocked by revelations that a referee was betting on matches he officiated in, making calls that manipulated the point-spread to his liking.
3. SUBSTITUTION: HORSE RACING Ah, the ol’ switcheroo. By racing a weak horse in the build up to a big race, owners and trainers can blow out the odds of it winning, before replacing it with a similar looking, but much faster horse come crunch time. Substitution has historically been popular as it is customary for individuals to bet large amounts on their own horse, regardless of its chances. The most infamous example of this in Australian racing history occurred in 1984, with a horse (well, two) called d Fine Cotton. Several of horseracing’s ’s elite were found to be involved, emphasising the seductive nature of substitution. Since then, stringent methods have been in place to check there are no equine doppelgangers.
The term ‘calciopoli’ is a pun on the Italian phrase ‘tangentopoli’, which roughly translates to ‘bribesville’. This involves rigging everything you possibly can to win the championship and, of course, reaping the rewards by betting on your own team. Calciopoli was born out of the 2006 Italian football betting scandal, which was in many ways a work of art. During the 20042005 season, Juventus general manager Luciano Moggi contacted Italian football officials to influence referee appointment. Several other managers also participated and soon, several teams across the top two divisions of Italian football, Serie A and Serie B, were complicit in organising crooked referees. When the scandal broke in 2006, Juventus, who finished the season as premiers, were severely punished, along with Milan, Fiorentina, Lazio, and Reggina. Calcipoli is testament to how enough money can win you premierships in football, just as long as you are smart enough to not waste it on players.
5. OPTIONS-FIXING: RUGBY LEAGUE Though usually unpopular, NRL punters can bet on miscellaneous aspects of the game such as first try-scorer or number of line-breaks. ‘Options-fixing’ is similar to spot fixing but trickier to execute, as you have to pay a player to ensure an event occurs despite the ease of third parties (i.e. other players) messing up the fix. Options-betting was dragged to the fore in 2010 when bookmakers taking bets for a match between the Bulldogs and the Cowboys noted an abnormally large amount of money being put on the first points scored to be a penalty goal. Within minutes after kick-off, Bulldogs player Ryan Tandy gave away a soft penalty right in front of goal, but the Cowboys took a quick tap and scored a try, rather than kicking a penalty goal. The NRL probed into the event before handing the matter to the police. Tandy meanwhile, refused to explain evidence which indicates he was involved in options fixing. The NRL, constantly rocked by off-field scandals, surely couldn’t withstand on-field scandal too.
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ISSUE 03 SCIENCE & TECH
A lot on the line SAM BURNHAM TAKES THE FUN OUT OF ABUSING REFEREES.
Debate over goal-line technology was reignited after FIFA, the International Football Federation, again delayed their decision over its implementation. The year-long delay of possibly utilising the technology, designed to give a scientific, definitive answer to line-ball decisions, means fans must continue to dread those occasional game-deciding referee blunders. At no point was this fear more justified than the England / Germany second round clash at the 2010 World Cup. England had a goal disallowed when the referee decided the ball hadn’t crossed the line. Thirty seconds and one replay later, and everyone in the 40,000-capacity stadium knew it was a goal. For Germany, it
WHAT DO YOU MEME? TIM SCRIVEN WAXES VIRAL. So, what is an internet meme? It may surprise you to learn that it’s not, strictly speaking, a meme. A meme, as the concept was outlined by Richard Dawkins, is an idea that spreads from person to person, reproducing itself like a conceptual virus. An internet meme, meanwhile, is typically some fragment of media that is adapted, posted, re-adapted and posted again. Memes are deeply referential and meaningful, but in an odd
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tainted their win with an asterisk, while England went home feeling cheated. The technology being considered for goalline assistance is the specialist, camera-based Hawk-Eye. Already successfully implemented in tennis, cricket and snooker, Hawk-Eye has undergone extensive testing for football. It is based on the principles of triangulation and utilises multiple high-speed video cameras to map the most statistically-likely path of a ball. Its implementation has received widespread support from players, coaches and fans. So why has goal-line technology been so dogmatically rejected? FIFA remain steadfast in their romanticised image of the sport being pure - untainted by technology. They maintain such technology reduces the human element of the game, of which mistakes are part, as it always has been during its history.Yet, the stakes are ever-increasing and there are many cases of important games marred by poor decisions from a select few individuals. Trained officials are vital obviously, but this doesn’t mean they wouldn’t benefit from help, which is what advocates of goal-line technology are arguing. When 40, 000 people can see one man’s
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decision is wrong, perhaps that man needs assistance. FIFA President Sepp Blatter says that the game’s popularity is rooted in ‘the human nature’ of the sport, that it is fun to argue over controversial refereeing decisions, which he claims would be ruined by the new technology. But surely the popularity of a 150-year-old sport – ‘the world game’, no less – is founded on more than the excitement of a quarrel. To suggest otherwise shows a lack of confidence in the sport, rather than the technology.
SCIENCE & TECH way. If I post on your wall: ‘BOOM HEADSHOT,’ or ‘Do you liek Mudkipz,’ or picture of a cat ‘saying’ something funny with purposely butchered language what I am saying cannot be fully understood without understanding that I am using recycled media, that many before me have posted in many variations, or perhaps the very same thing. Every internet meme in a very important sense gets an essential part of its meaning
from referring to itself. Memes are enabled by the internet. The speed at which they multiply depends on the capacity of anyone and everyone in an internet age to repost things and reforward them. But while memes may begin on the internet, increasingly they do not end there. I once saw a homeless man holding a familiarlooking sign that read: ‘Family kidnapped by ninjas, need money for Karate lessons.’ Sure enough, I
had seen the exact same sign before online. We live in exciting times, the distinction between the culture of cyberspace, and the culture of the ‘real world’ is dissolving. Memes replicate much like a living thing; they last for a period of time, and then die off. Those that last the longest are often the ones that are the most adaptable, that can be changed to suit any situation. No-one knows exactly what makes a meme survive and thrive, what it takes to make a meme ‘go viral.’ That x-factor is seemingly unknowable, a contingency built into the very edifice of the interwebs. But if someone did work it out, I for one would like to know the secret formula before advertising agencies make a bucketload of money out of it. But until it is found, the success of a meme remains pot luck. Creating memes is even harder than defining them.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM ENTERTAINMENT
The Best of Celebrity Crazy on YouTube WE DISCOVER THAT EVEN THE RICH AND FAMOUS HAVE THEIR OFF-DAYS.
SHEEN’S KORNER Charlie Sheen needn’t worry about the press tearing him down anymore because he’s clearly accomplishing that all by himself. We didn’t know it was possible, but Sheen’s video blogs, the ‘Torpedos of Truth,’ are even more disturbing then his performance on Two and A Half Men. His demented ranting peaks at Episode Three when he pitches an idea for a book ‘Apocalypse Me: The Jaws of Life’ (appropriate hand actions are attached to the title), considers marrying a tree, and complains that he’s been ‘foiled by phones and trolls’. Whilst Charlie seems convinced that he’s ‘winning’ and exposing ‘warlock’ truths, the only thing he’s convinced us of is that he has truly lost his marbles.
‘BALE OUT’ – REVOLUCIAN’S CHRISTIAN BALE RANT REMIX Christian Bale is too hot to be disliked for long. We’ve all conveniently forgotten that on the set of Terminator 3 in 2008, he was recorded ripping into crew member, Shane Hurlbut, for interrupting a scene. Several F-bombs ensued. Bale’s explosive insults have now been through the meme cycle – the audio clip has been remixed, parodied (Michael Cera’s leaked ‘rant’ is particularly enjoyable), and re-enacted to no end. With almost five million views, the RevoLucian remix takes the cake for turning Bale’s expletives into a catchy dance track, featuring a snatch of ‘Barbara Streisand’’s one-line outburst at a Bush supporter (‘Shut the F--- up! Shut up if you can’t take a joke!’). Masterful stuff.
SAD KEANU
WINEMOUSE
Keanu Reeves was photographed eating a sandwich alone on a park bench, and he looked sad. Neo-afterTrinity’s-death sad. It happens to all of us. Unfortunately for Reeves however, a paparazzo captured his blue moment and the next thing you know ‘Sad Keanu’ had become an Internet hit. A montage was posted on YouTube with shopped pictures of Reeves hunched over and sitting with a bear, next to Forest Gump and with Frodo and the Fellowship, among others. Don’t be so glum Keanu; we’re all waiting for a Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure III.
Sharing a mutual love for crack and a vehement distaste for rehab, Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty are really the perfect couple. In 2008 these two crazy kids decided to make it official and popped out a couple of…mouse babies? Yes. That’s right. If you haven’t seen the clip, a high-as-akite Pete and Amy introduce a box of day-old mice to the world. One of the mice even has a message to send out to her perpetually jail-bound hubby Blake Fielder-Civil. What a duo. What a clip.
ENTERTAINMENT THE STROKES FROM ALL ANGLES ANNE WIDJAJA LETS OUT A SIGH OF RELIEF FOR THE FUTURE OF GUITAR ROCK. Since the release of The Strokes’ third studio album First Impressions of Earth in 2006, Strokes fans everywhere had been dreading the signs of an impending band breakup – four of the five band members had embarked on successful solo projects, and reuniting for another album was rarely mentioned. On hiatus, Julian Casablancas was also looking cooler than ever. Luckily, we were all saved from any further depressing
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speculation when The Strokes began touring again in 2010. Rumours of a new album were finally confirmed when fourth album Angles was announced to be released in March. So what do The Strokes sound like after a five year long hiatus? Angles is the first album which the band has created democratically, instead of following the usual Casablancas-led model. The result is mixed. The 80s pop-synth beats on tracks like ‘Two Kinds of Happiness’ and ‘Games’ are unoriginal and outdated. But, there’s also a marked return to the garage rock-style circa Is This It on the album. ‘Macchu Pichu’ is a triumphant return to the old, and in the delightful ‘Under Cover of Darkness’ Casablancas’ vocals hit new highs, amongst simple layers of coasting drum rhythms and guitar solos. ‘Taken For a Fool’ is also a much
needed break from the straight upbeat pop sound of the album. Slicker and edgier than the other tracks, it’s neatly structured with a funk guitar riff and an expertly controlled groove rhythm which peaks victoriously at the chorus. However, there are also some tracks that are disappointingly flat (‘Call Me Back,’ ‘Metabolism’) and lack the usual immediate charm of The Strokes’ sound. The band’s attempt at bringing their sound up to date with the electro-pop that dominates airwaves, and the mix of the individual band members’ styles, makes for a disjointed album. Nonetheless, there is room for hope. The band is still trying to find their feet again, and when they do, we’ll be intently listening.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM REVIEWS
REVIEWS FILM BATTLE: LOS ANGELES JONATHAN LIEBESMAN
GIG THE IDEA OF NORTH CAMELOT LOUNGE, MARRICKVILLE
CD DYE IT BLONDE SMITH WESTERNS
Going into the cinema after a healthy viewing of blockbuster scifi films, Battle: Los Angeles certainly lived up to clichéd expectations. Overwhelmed US armed forces succeed against a seemingly insurmountable alien threat... how original. Those viewing the film with a War of theWorlds mentality, which would hardly be surprising when you compare the Tom Cruise approach and the somewhat melodramatic trailer for Battle: Los Angeles, will be refreshed by the triumph of humanity in outplaying and out-witting the alien invaders. Those seeking something beyond gore and violence will be disappointed at the lack of romance or eye candy. The film focuses on the response of US marine forces to a surprise meteorite shower in Earth’s atmosphere and the subsequent swift tactics of an alien invasion. The original depiction of the extra-terrestrial ground and air forces adds some intrigue to the film, alongside the at-times convincing performances of Aaron Eckhart and frequent Hollywood female officer Michelle Rodriguez. Overriding the experience, however, is the underwhelming screenplay and default scriptwriting which probably lends this film towards a DVD-rental better seen on the small screen.
If there’s one thing that The Idea of North really know; it’s how to sing. Pitch-perfect with tight entries, the Australian quartet’s performance was a rich blend of melodious bliss. Being an acapella jazz quartet, The Idea of North performed using only their voices (save for some microphones, body percussion and a shaker stick or two). Particularly impressive was the scope of styles, techniques and sounds that the group was able to explore using this simple instrument. Drawing many a delighted smile and laugh from the audience, the group’s highlights included a heart-breaking rendition of ‘His Eye Is On The Sparrow’ (a gospel hymn made famous by Sister Act 2); an energetic take on Ray Charles’ ‘Hallelujah I Love Her So’ and even an extremely comical performance of ‘Psycho: The Musical’ using the tune of Phantom of The Opera’s ‘Music of The Night.’ In addition, each member’s voice was used uniquely throughout the show to represent various instrumental sounds such as a muted trumpet, double-bass and drum kit. Here is a band that shares a close connection; with occasional smiles at unspoken jokes - the audience could feel it. With the group touring nationally, The Idea of North are definitely not to be missed.
The first thing that strikes you about the Smith Westerns is just how young they are. Lead singer and chief songwriter Cullen Omori is 21 and, in fact, the elder statesman of the band, with the rest of the collective being either 19 or 20 years of age. Their sophomore release, Dye It Blonde, revolves around this core truth, with a thematic focus primarily on love, partying, and a love of partying. Admittedly, these are hardly groundbreaking areas but they have proved to be abundantly fertile, and the spacey synth-pop (with just a dash of glam-rock thrown in) of Dye It Blonde firmly establishes the Smith Westerns as a band on the rise. The opening song, ‘Weekend’ essentially represents a microcosm of the entirety of this album, from its girl-I’m-lost-without-you lyricism, to the crunchy guitar licks that welcome us into the Smith Westerns’ world. Tracks such as ‘Smile, ’Imagine’ and fan favourite ‘All Die Young,’ showcase Omori’s mature and complex songwriting. But others, in particular the appalling ‘Dance Away,’ betray the uncertainty that comes with barely being out of your teens. These guys aren’t hit machines, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
BOOK THERE ONCE LIVED A WOMAN WHO TRIED TO KILL HER NEIGHBOUR’S BABY: SCARY FAIRY TALES LUDMILLA PETRUSHEVSKAYA
There is something beautiful about sitting down with your cup of tea, in your ordinary cardigan, and being transported to another world. And very few other worlds are more pleasing than those of Petrushevskaya. Hers teeter on a magical balance between quirky and startling, delightful and horrific in this compilation of fantastical short stories. Written in her magic realist style, the whimsicality of the fairy tale is blended with the harsh reality of Russian life, particularly focusing on the lives of women. Her women are attacked by men, widowed, enslaved by wizards and experience jealousy to the point of trying to kill their neighbour’s baby. However, they are also saved from gangs by their dead mothers, married by Greek Gods and rewarded for their love by a strange cabbage patch baby. As dark and bleak as it gets, Perrushevskaya ultimately speaks of hope. The introduction, written by the translators, is a must read. Ludmilla’s life is as marked by repression and unusual encounters as her stories are. For fans of the reinterpretations of Angela Carter, the surreal world of Edgar Allan Poe and the stark beauty of Anton Chekhov, these Scary Fairy Tales are essential reading.
BRENDAN DAY HARRIET MCINERNEY
ADAM WALL ERIN ROONEY
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ISSUE 03 REVIEWS
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DVD
Sons of Anarchy: Season 3 FX
PAUL ELLIS For those of you not familiar with the show, Sons of Anarchy is an FX production that follows the founding charter of a vigilante outlaw motorcycle club in California. Based on the reallife Hells Angels, the eponymous gang feature a tough-as-bones patriarchal President figure, and a Hamlet-inspired protagonist, who somehow manages to ooze humanity despite being a murderous bikie. Beside strong characters, Sons boasts some brave storytelling and gives genuine insight into what small-town America is really like. After watching a few episodes, you’ll wish you had your own posse of overweight, greying, leather-clad men to hang out with. The peculiarity of that sentence is a testament to how powerful this show is. Just as TheWire would entice you to start talking ‘street,’ and how Mad Men made drinking scotch suddenly cool, likewise is the influence of this series. Watching Sons you might just go and buy a Harley Davison. That’s the type of impression this show makes. A notable one. It will also have you revaluate any preconceived ideas you might possess about anarchy, truth and higher beings.
CD
Lasers Lupe Fiasco ROBERT NORTH
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Mainly anarchy. Not so much higher beings… though sort of. That brings us to the currently airing third season which is engaging and enjoyable. It is ambitious, with the show’s main storyline getting some serious development. There is an argument to say though that Sons is at its best when it doesn’t take itself too seriously. There’s something thrilling about seeing the club break the law just because they know they can get away with it. There’s less of that in season three. This is partly because a large section of the series is spent in Ireland. While this delivers some juicy back-story into the
Alt-rapper Lupe Fiasco frequently tip toes the fine line between indie-cool and generic. His politically-minded and expressive records garner a wide audience; unafraid to flirt with the mainstream, but conscious of his distinction from the dominant ‘gangsta-rap’ artists. Preceded by a lengthy and well-publicised feud with record company Atlantic Records, Lasers sees Fiasco’s artistic direction take a backseat to Atlantic’s apparent commercial aspirations and demands. Melodramatic and lacklustre, opening track ‘Letting Go’ sets an unfortunate tone for Lasers. On ‘Till I Get There,’ Fiasco’s rhymes sound laboured and uninspired, whilst ‘I Don’t Wanna Care Right Now’ features an over-reliance on electro-pop synth. ‘State Run Radio’ is an interesting attempt at diversity, fusing rock and rap, although it fails to progress lyrically. The same may be said of the insidiously repetitive ‘Out Of My Head,’ or the John Legend collaboration ‘Never Forget You’. There are, however, notable exceptions. ‘All Black Everything’ is the closest we get to an old-school Lupe track. The melancholic violin sample underscores an idealistic representation of free Africans and Europeans in unison.
life of the enigmatic John Teller, the episodes in Ireland can drag on. Taking the setting outside of the small-town Charming somewhat blunts the experience. The town itself is a character as captivating as those who inhabit it. Fortunately, the Sons don’t spend the whole season overseas, and the final episodes back in the US are among the strongest in the series, the finale in particular is beyond clever. Sons of Anarchy’s third season is essentially the same endearing and intelligent show. It sacrifices a little fun for the sake of setting up what, admittedly, looks like being a phenomenal fourth and fifth season.
The standout is ‘Words I Never Said,’ which explodes with overt political messages, skilfully interjected with the vocals of prominent up-andcomer Skylar Grey. While it lacks the subtlety of Fiasco’s metaphor-riddled previous albums, ‘Words I Never Said’ is a refreshingly explicit insight into Fiasco’s psyche. Lead single ‘The Show Goes On’ is similarly to the point. Perfectly-timed lyrical daggers emphasise the contention between Fiasco and Atlantic. ‘They treat you like a slave, put chains all on your soul,’ states Lupe. ‘I just laugh… Unaffected by they threats, than get busy on they ass,’ he quips. Musically, it is extremely catchy. The heavy sampling of Modest Mouse’s indie-rock hit ‘Float On’ is reminiscent of a College Dropout-era Kanye West at his best. The result is an album which lacks the emotional depth, political resonance, and sense of cohesion present in Fiasco’s previous endeavours. When given the artistic freedom he deserves, Fiasco shines. Here’s hoping he comes back with a vengeance, and gets ‘busy on they ass’ once more.
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ISSUE 03 MINDGAMES
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Very basic (9) Pertaining to marriage (7) Snobbish (7) Medical practitioner (6) Sags (6) Show (5) Deport (9) Including everything (7) Plain (7) Refute (6) Disconnect from a power supply (6) Dignified music passage (5)
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WORD PYRAMID Cheat the result
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Rule of a monarch 12+
District Wearing away
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9x 11+
Sorting 9+
Storing on tape
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ISSUE 03 THE BULL PEN
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THE BULL PEN
J
ust as winter follows autumn, night follows day and three million people inexplicably follow Charlie Sheen on Twitter, the natural successor to metrosexuality has arrived. It looks back at the golden age of masculinity wistfully, but isn’t quite willing to give up on manscaping just yet. It wears a moustache as a joke, but secretly thinks it makes him look a little more virile. It cares so much about sport, it occasionally cries. Welcome to the age of the Ironman (pronounced abound. Forget International i-ron-man) - a portmanteau Examples Women’s Day. After the Australian release of of man and irony. It is the heart-clogging, no bread multiple meat monstrosity known as the Double (nee Double today’s trend of ironically Down), the KFC marketing department evoking an image of declared: ‘a Month of Mantime.’ Eating one of these Doubles, aptly named for its correlation modern man as hopelessly with double bypass surgery, is now apparently grasping towards traditional the highest aspiration for the entire gender. The trend is huge in beer ads. Remember manliness, but either falling the days when VB suggested you could only get short, settling for less, ‘it’ smelting, wood chopping or chipping away at a mine face with a pickaxe. Better yet, all three, looking stupid or all three. whilst hitting a ton in a
I-ron Man and the Battle for Manliness MAX HALDEN ASKS IF YOU’RE MAN ENOUGH.
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test match. Today VB lists chucking a sicky, not eating quiche and forgoing flat pack furniture instructions as modern man’s greatest achievements. In expressing masculinity it seems, the tongue is firmly planted in the cheek and the Ironman reigns supreme. In the 90s, the fittingly named Solo Man, singlehandedly wrestled crocodiles, kayaked through forests and white-water rafted over jagged rocks just to earn a can of fizzy lemon drink. Imagine what he’d do for a whole bottle! Today, Solo Man’s biggest peril is that other drinks have too many bubbles, making it slightly harder to ‘slam it down fast.’ The message it seems, is that we’ve gone soft and the best way to cope is to lampoon old-school manliness. Of course, we come to the epitome of Ironmany: the Old Spice ads. If you live in a comedy vacuum and still haven’t seen it, picture an unfathomably attractive, rich and caring man petitioning you to smell like him (and therefore be like him) by wearing a deodorant that’s been around since before World War Two. The complete unattainability of the ancient wonders of chivalry (‘tickets to that thing you like’), class
(fistfuls of diamonds) and a six pack hardened by back breaking labour, amplify the inferiority of the modern Joe Sixpack. These days, the only sixpack belonging to Joe is the one he takes over to his mates’ house to watch footy and indulge their ‘bromance.’ Perhaps it’s good we’re discarding some of the stupid, overblown ideas of what it used to mean to be a man. The most dangerous thing most of us face everyday is the Campos coffee line, which leaves little room for the rough and tough man of yore. For example, the FullyLoaded Man parody ads for Chunky Soup suggest the spirit of bravado and daringness exhibited by the old school protagonist will ensure ‘he’ll probably die.’ We’ve moved on to the extent that the exaggerated specimens of manliness featured in those advertisements look like they’d be at home in bad seventies pornos, rather than something worthy of emulation. It’s somewhat refreshing to celebrate the ordinary, if not slightly stereotypical qualities of the modern male persona rather than a clichéd and outdated ideal of virility, rugged individualism and unhealthy attitudes towards women. But is it too much to ask that we don’t completely trash the ideals of chivalry, mastery
of the natural world and the cultivation of facial hair? Men shouldn’t be ashamed of occasionally wanting to be irresponsibly masculine any more than indulging a weakness for well-constructed opera or singing along to Ke$ha. And if it involves more non-ironic moustaches, then I am personally for it.
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BULL USUONLINE.COM CAUGHT ON CAMPUS
EASTERN AVENUE CAN’T HANDLE ME
SERIOUS EQUIPMENT
YAWN, WHATEVER HANDS UP
OH HAI
CLOWNING AROUND
PHOTOS BY ELIZABETH SCHAFFER
CAUGHT ON CAMPUS
13 APRIL 2011 SILENT DISCO
T
he Silent Disco descended on Eastern Avenue, getting some cool cats movin’ and shakin’ out in the hot sun. Many more looked on in awe, disgust, terror, or lust, but the moves busted were of exceptional quality, even if the unaccompanied singing wasn’t.
CAN’T TOUCH THIS
MIXING SOME PHAT BEATS
CROWDSURFING IS ENCOURAGED
WHITE HEADPHONES ARE IN THIS YEAR
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SUNGLASSES ARE NECESSARY FOR FUNK
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Not sure who to vote for? Hear the candidates speak about their policies. You and a panel can ask them the hard questions.
Candidates Soapbox Tuesday 10 May - Manning Bar - 12.45pm
ELECTION DAY MAY 25 VOTE, EAT AND PARTY Cast your vote and get a $5 meal voucher* Come along to the Election Night Party Hermannâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s - 7.30pm. Free entertainment and live updates as the votes are counted! *conditions apply
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