Blessed Magazine June/July, 2019

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Powerful Prayers for Believers of the Faith When you feel like you have nothing to say in prayer, lean on the timeless Word of God.

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PUBLISHER LT ENTERPRISES EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR CHRIS LAWSON EDITOR-IN-CHIEF LARAINE TURNER SENIOR ADMINISTRATOR ZACHARY SANDERS DESIGN AND LAYOUT MICHAEL MURPHY COVER DESIGN LT ENTERPRISES CONTRIBUTING WRITERS/ARTICLES/PHOTOS SHARED FROM STIFTELSEN SKJULTE SKATTERS FORLAG SIGURD BRATLIE WWW.LIESYOUNGWOMENBELIEVE.COM/SARAH GARRETT WWW.LIESYOUNGWOMENBELIEVE.COM/BETHANY BEAL LOUISE NIELSEN FRANK MYRLAND PURE LIFE MINISTRIES GOT QUESTION MINISTRIES DOYIN RICHARDS CHARIS PETKAU KRISTEN WOLFE PAULA MARSTELLER JOHN UPCHURCH JEMIMA MAYERS A. PAWLOWSKI KRIS GUNNARS, BSC EVA ALMA DIMEL PINTEREST, YOUTUBE and SHUTTERSTOCK PUBLIC RELATIONS DIRECTOR TIFFANY BOSTON WEBSITE WWW.BLESSEDMAGAZINE.ORG

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Contents June/July, 2019

Inside This Issue

Spiritual Wellness ▪ ▪ ▪

Is it Possible to Be Perfect? – 20 Idolatry in the Present Day: What Are Today’s Idols? – 23 The Holy Spirit vs. the Spirit of the Times: Who is Controlling You? – 28

Personal Wellness ▪ ▪

The Struggle with Lust! Not Just a Problem for Men – 32 A Battle to Overcome My Inferiority Complex - 37

Relationships ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪

The Husband List: 12 Non-Negotiables – 42 Why Do So Many Women Show Off Cleavage in Church - 47 No Boyfriend? What’s Wrong with You? – 51 Dad 101: How to Step Up Your Game in 10 Steps by Guest Blogger Doyin Richards – 55 Foundations of a Healthy, Happy Family - 60

Also in this Issue: ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪

A Word from the Lord by Evangelist Nancy Turner – 19 Cinching That Waist! 10 Small Food Changes That May Make a Big Difference in Your Waistline – 66 7 Low Carb Meals in Under 10 Minutes - 70 From Death to Life – 77 Rise Up by Guest Writer Eva Alma Dimel - 79

Regulars ▪ ▪

Editor’s Corner -12 Market Place - 80 Question: Do You Know

Jesus? 10 | Blessed Magazine

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Editor’s Corner

Praise the Lord My Brothers and Sisters in Christ! First, I always give all glory and honor to my Lord Jesus Christ for without Him in my life, nothing I could ever do would amount to anything! Well summer is here and the children are out of school. This will be a busy time for parents as they try to juggle their schedule to include children. But, nevertheless, let’s try to enjoy this time together and plan activities which are enriching and fulfilling for the whole family and don’t forget to include Jesus. Take the Lord along with you, every where you go! I want to personally thank all of our fans and readers for their continued support of this ministry which has continued to strive and for that I am grateful to our Lord, Jesus Christ Our goal is to continue being a resource for Christians and others for years to come and with your support we can keep this publication available free of charge always on our digital platform Pray for us as we continue to pray for you and thank you for reading this issue of Blessed Magazine God bless you! Your Humble Servant in Christ,

Laraine Turner Editor-in-Chief

12 | Blessed Magazine




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Powerful Prayers for Believers of the Faith When you feel like you have nothing to say in prayer, lean on the timeless Word of God.

These life-giving prayers can kick-start your conversations with God

“I can’t tell you how much I appreciate having this available to me. It has inspired me to develop a better relationship with God. You guys are the best and I pray others will be blessed by this book - Susan

Exclusively at Blessed Magazine Get Yours Today! No Purchase Necessary!


Also in this issue

A Word From the Lord by Evangelist Nancy Turner When you are feeling lonely and seem like no one cares You don't even feel good about yourself you need a word from the Lord…

We are sometimes burdened with the cares of this world and don't know what to do. But there is only one way to receive help when we are burdened and that is from the Word of the Lord. We have to realize that God is our burden bearer. He said in His word, ‘Cast all your cares upon Him, for He careth for you’: 1 Peter: 5:7 We are the people of God the Word of God let us know:

He shall sustain thee, He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved: Psalms: 55:22b We have to remember to depend and believe in the word of God and He will lift the burden and see you through This is (A Word from the Lord)

19 | Blessed Magazine


Spiritual Wellness

? Written by Sigurd Bratlie

Is it possible to be perfect? Just what does it mean to be perfect? We read that the sacrifices in the old covenant could not make the conscience of the worshiper perfect. It only dealt with foods, drinks, and various washings and ordinances, imposed until the time of reformation. (Hebrews 9:910) Is it possible to be perfect? Here we see the imperfection of the old sacrifices: they were not able to make people perfect according to the conscience; they served only as a reminder of sin. (Hebrews 10:3) However, with Christ came the time of reformation, of putting everything in order. Now we can become perfect according to the conscience. Our conscience is our understanding of good and evil. Therefore, to be perfect means that a person has put everything in his life in order according to the understanding he has. Then he no longer has these continual reminders of sins.

He says that if anyone would be His disciple, he must forsake everything, deny himself, take up his cross daily, and follow Him. (Luke 9:23) A perfect apprentice is someone who gives up all his own opinions and plans and is obedient to his master. He must say, as Jesus did when He came into the world, “Behold, I have come … to do Your will, O God.” (Hebrews 10:7) Not for any other reason! Then he is a perfect disciple, although he is not yet perfected like the Master.

When Paul says, “Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on …” (Philippians 3:12), he means that he has not yet been perfected like his Master, but that he is pursuing it.

Then in Philippians 3:15 he goes on to say, “Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind.” Here he means that they are perfect as apprentices. They had forsaken everything. There was nothing left to hinder them from entering into all that the Master had to teach them. They were here for the The Difference Between Being Perfect and sole purpose of doing the will of Jesus, their Being Perfected Master. They had put everything in order according to the light they had and could say, Jesus calls us disciples (or apprentices). “To the degree that we have already attained, 20 | Blessed Magazine


Spiritual Wellness let us walk by the same rule.” Philippians 3:16. Paul could not have said this to someone who was not perfect, to someone who had not forsaken everything, to someone who was still under the power of lying or backbiting, for example. It would be appalling if such a person were to “continue in the same course.” However, to someone who had put everything in order according to the light of his conscience, he could say, “Continue in the same course as the Master gives you increasing light and revelation in your life.”

seen His glory—the glory of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth. And of His fullness we have all received: grace for grace.

Be Perfect—and Press on to Perfection! When we speak about being perfect, we mean perfect according to our conscience as disciples—and this is possible! From that point we are to press on and be perfected. Jesus says, “It is enough for a disciple that he be like his teacher …” Matthew 10:25. Nevertheless, until we are, we must be poor in spirit, and hunger and thirst. (Matthew 5:3,6) Jesus’ last words were that we should make disciples of all nations. It is comparatively easy to get people to pray to Jesus for the forgiveness of their sins, but to make disciples of them is hard work. To get them to forsake everything and teach them to observe all that He has commanded them is an enormous job. When it concerns such a salvation, most people do not really believe in the grace that is in Christ, despite the full assurance of Jesus’ words: “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.” Matthew 28:18. Yet, praise God, there are some who have 21 | Blessed Magazine


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Spiritual Wellness

Idolatry in the Present Day: Written by Frank Myrland

It took only forty days from when Moses went to talk with God on Mount Sinai for the Israelites to fall into idolatry. Even after witnessing the miracles that freed them out of Egypt, they demanded that Aaron make a new god for them to worship. (Exodus 32) We can think: “How is that possible after they’d so strongly experienced God’s goodness?” As long as they were faithful to serve God things went well for Israel. As soon as they turned to other idols things started to go seriously downhill. And yet, again and again the Israelites turned from God. They were deluded by riches, by other customs and different teachings. The Old Testament is rich with examples, both good and bad, that remain just as relevant in the

present day. They serve as a cautionary tale for our own lives. Modern Day Idolatry – More Than Golden Calves Today idolatry remains a powerful tool that the devil uses to turn us away from God. However, now it has taken many different forms. Just like in the stories from the Old Testament, there are many pleasures of life or material goods that divert our attention away from serving God. Achieving these earthly goals can consume us. Many would quickly do whatever immoral deed it takes to satisfy their desires. Even smaller, more “harmless” things can twist our attention away from God. It can be very easy to get completely wrapped up in earthly

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Spiritual Wellness matters. I can talk for hours about these things, but ask me about God’s Word and I’m completely empty. Dry as a desert. But shouldn’t that, as a Christian, actually be my only true concern? To fill myself with the word of God so that I have a clear guideline by which to live my life? The Bible gives us incredibly clear direction about how we are to take this.

concerning a Christian life refers to the inner battle that arises when a sinful thought tempts you. God’s Spirit and the flesh are at odds. When you have decided to only do ... so that your thoughts are not on a wandering, back-and-forth trail, but that your mind is set firmly on things above! God will bless such a heart that is wholly for Him, just as He blessed the Israelites when they were faithful to Him.

“If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things of the earth.” Colossians 3:1-2. “But lay up for yourselves treasure in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do no break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:20-21 How Do I Spend My Time? We always take time for things that we are interested in. My hope is eternal life with the Father and the Son! My whole being should be focused on such a glorious future. If my eyes are really open to see that a life that is pleasing to God is what really matters, then all the temporary distractions will fade away. They will no longer have any value. I should be able to say with Jesus, “My kingdom is not of this earth.” John 18:36. Take a look back at your past week and ask yourself, “Where were my thoughts? What was I busy with?” If you have an honest and pure desire to serve God, then you need to take up a battle Almost all talk of battles and wars when

What is the Root of Idolatry? “Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.” Colossians 3:5. Here we can clearly see what is behind idolatry: covetousness. When the things of earth become great to you and divert your mind and heart from the guiding voice of the Holy Spirit. All too often, the biggest idol in our lives is the one that looks us right in the mirror each and every morning. We are by nature

24 | Blessed Magazine


Spiritual Wellness egocentric, self-involved people. Our thoughts naturally go in one pattern: me, me, me. This spirit, which is promoted by every form of media available today, is the same spirit that filled the devil when he challenged God. (Isaiah 14:12-15) This spirit is horribly destructive and can only be countered by humility – by placing our lives in God’s hands and yielding completely to His will. The Dangers of Serving Two Masters Someone who tries to play the balancing act of serving both God and earthly idols is doomed to fail. We receive a very clear warning about this in Matthew 6:24: “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.” James 1:8 says that a double-minded man is “unstable in all his ways.” Even if we begin with a pure desire to serve God alone, this determination can drift away if we allow ourselves to be distracted by earthly “idols” instead of seeking the things above. This

Image Shared From Dr. Michele Burke

determination is something worth fighting to hold onto! We will find that, just as in the days of the Israelites, God richly blesses a faithful singleness of purpose, and there is still a curse over idolatry. Let us fix our vision firmly on the eternal and we will experience God’s goodness and power in our lives. End

Image Shared From onsizzle.com

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Spiritual Wellness

The Holy Spirit vs. the Spirit of the Times: Who is Controlling You? Written by Louise Nielsen

“Man is the master of his own destiny.” So the saying goes. But in recent years, there seem to be some seemingly overpowering influences that confront people. We live in an increasingly borderless world with technological tools of many kinds. Over the past decade, technology has taken us by storm and provided items that we now regard as necessities. This development has also affected our behavior, and there seems to be a growing debate in the media about people’s lack of social interaction. Many things can occupy our time and thoughts but what should we be conscious of in this regard?

things to which the heart was attached pass away while the person himself, who is an eternal being, is filled with nothing but emptiness when he should have been filled with God Himself. That is why it is so very important that we allow God to draw our minds away from everything that is external – the things that will pass away – and turn our focus inward to the source of life that lives forever, even as we ourselves will live forever. Then joy and unspeakable peace can fill us, beginning in this time of corruptibility and continuing into the unknown eternities. May the Lord enable us for this.” The Spirit of the Times Versus the Holy Spirit

“An inner life and inner enemies to conquer, battle and destroy. The enemies of our inner life are those forces that want to scatter our thoughts by focusing our attention on external things. These enemies are the various desires that seek to distract our concentration by causing our thoughts to cling to outward things, things that will pass away. This is perdition: the

The spirit of the times is the evil spirit found in much of the world’s modern culture/attitudes. It is not constant, and can vary from era to era and culture to culture. Though not always obviously evil in itself, the ... This force, which wants to make our minds

28 | Blessed Magazine


Spiritual Wellness hold on to outward things, is the spirit of the times. You walk in this spirit when you allow the world to direct you; this is the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience (Ephesians 2:2). In stark contrast to this is The Holy Spirit, God’s mouthpiece to humanity. The spirit of the times works directly against The Holy Spirit, with the goal of filling us with things that will pass away – instead of us being filled with God’s Spirit. How do we view this in the context of today’s world? These days, many young people have a hard time concentrating – they are constantly looking for entertainment, and no teacher seems to be entertaining enough to hold their attention. Among other things, the spirit of the times encourages selfpromotion. But as a Christian, I must be aware of what spirit I fill myself with, and what motivates actions. “All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.” 1 Corinthians 6:12. With eternity in focus, it is not the time spent on self-actualization that will benefit me the most. God always has something to say to me through the Holy Spirit. He has the recipe for a happy life, if I will just listen to His voice and act according to it. But that requires me to be quiet and attentive, because the path of least resistance is always to turn a deaf ear to God’s voice and consequently give in to the incessant desire for constant entertainment.

There is so much more to this world than what most people see and hear. There is an invisible world, which nevertheless can be clearly perceived by believers. (Hebrews 11:1) Therefore the believer has an awareness that the spirit of the times of this world would replace joy with a feeling of emptiness, while the Holy Spirit will help us to attain the same virtues that Jesus had. This is what God wants me to spend my life on. If I focus on my inner life rather than the outward; then instead of seeking momentary pleasure, I seek to do what gives me value in the eternal realm that awaits me together with everyone who has fought this same battle Gold nuggets such as the passage above by Smith were written more than 100 years ago, but they are no less relevant today. They are words I can use in my daily life – words which can give me an enlightened perspective so I focus on my eternal destiny rather than on other more or less meaningless activities. This makes it so that I consciously prioritize filling myself with God’s Word, and thus the heavenly vision I get becomes the backdrop for all my daily activities. My spirit is renewed day by day, or in other words, I become a new person each day! What an exciting life to live of continual constant growth! End Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

A Conscious Focus on the Inner Life 29 | Blessed Magazine


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Personal Wellness

places I knew were anything but pure and holy. Image Shared From Pure Life Ministries

Her Struggle I crawled into my bed and turned on the lamp. It was late. I was tired. But that didn’t keep me from reading a book in my favorite genre, Christian romance novels. I justified my actions and convinced myself that these books were innocent and clean.

My actions may have appeared pure, but my heart was filled with lust. The romance novel season of my life started around the ninth grade. It lasted for a few years. I kept convincing myself that it wasn’t a big deal. I wanted to believe that the words “Christian Romance Novel” being on the back of the book made these books okay. Good. Pure. Even holy.

What harm could they do?

They weren’t though. And deep down, I knew it.

One by one I devoured these books, rereading the extra “spicy” scenes over and over again. I put myself in the characters’ shoes and imagined the story was my own. I imagined that I was the one being wooed, pursued, and swept off my feet.

I was using these books to “awaken love” in my heart. I was choosing to lust after stories that weren’t my own. I was using these books to satisfy my longings for sexual intimacy.

When the story finished, I would lay in bed and create my own story. The fantasies continued in my mind, and I indulged in my thoughts. I allowed my mind to linger in

I was a woman with a lust problem. Lust Is a Human Problem. Don’t believe the lie that lust is a guys-only problem.

32 | Blessed Magazine


Personal Wellness

His Struggle Bored and without much to do on a Saturday night, I was alone in the basement surfing through TV channels. Like snapshots with sound, the images flipped by rapidly, telling me that, as usual, there wasn't much of anything on TV. Then I hit a couple of numbers randomly, and suddenly I was staring at slightly blurred images of naked bodies having sex.

Image Shared From Pure Life Ministries

year, I'd find opportunities to watch it. Sexually excited by what I'd seen, I'd go into the bathroom and masturbate. Then I'd experience intense guilt. I tried to stop. Sometimes I'd go weeks without watching that pornographic station. Even so, there were still other things that stimulated me sexually—and I didn't have to make any special effort to find them. It could be a model in a commercial or magazine ad. Or maybe I would stare longer than I should at a girl at school in a midriff-baring top, a short dress or low-cut shirt. I'd find myself daydreaming about what I'd seen. Sometimes those images I tucked into my brain led me to masturbate. But whether or not I masturbated, I knew I'd let myself fall into lust.

The blurry reception told me our cable connection had picked up a station that wasn't part of our package. I glanced at the remote, and then looked nervously toward the basement stairway. I knew I should change the channel, but instead I stared at the couple on the screen. Minutes passed before I clicked the remote. In that short period of time, I'd I was a man with a lust problem. placed powerful images in my mind that would play over and over like a continuous Lust Is a Human Problem. Don’t believe the instant replay. It wasn't the last time I'd turn to lie that lust is a woman’s-only problem. this "secret channel." Throughout my junior year, I'd find 33 | Blessed Magazine


Personal Wellness The dictionary definition of lust is "1) intense or unrestrained sexual craving, or 2) an overwhelming desire or craving." The Bible speaks of lust in several ways. Exodus 20:14, 17 (NLT), "Do not commit adultery. . . Do not covet your neighbor's house. Do not covet your neighbor's wife, male or female servant, ox or donkey, or anything else your neighbor owns," or Matthew 5:28, "But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust in his eye has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Job 31:11-12 (NLT) sums up lust quite nicely: "For lust is a shameful sin, a crime that should be punished. It is a devastating fire that destroys to hell. It would wipe out everything I own." Lust has as its focus pleasing oneself, and it often leads to unwholesome actions to fulfill one's desires with no regard to the consequences. Lust is about possession and greed. The Christian faith is about selflessness and is marked by holy living (Romans 6:19, 12:1-2; 1 Corinthians 1:2, 30, 6:19-20; Ephesians 1:4, 4:24; Colossians 3:12; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8, 5:23; 2 Timothy 1:9; Hebrews 12:14; 1 Peter 1:15-16). The goal of each person who has put his/her faith in Jesus Christ is to become more and more like Him each day. This means putting off the old way of life of which sin was in control, and conforming one's thoughts and actions to the standard put forth in Scripture. Lust is in opposition to this ideal.

1.

2.

Confess your sins to God. Start first and foremost by bringing this sin before God and asking Him for His forgiveness. He promises that if we ask He will forgive. Bring your lust into the light. Don’t keep this a secret. Don’t fight the battle on your own. Find a godly older women and tell her what’s going on. Bring this into the light and ask her to help you find true freedom.

Nobody will ever be perfect or attain sinlessness while still on this earth, yet it is still a goal for which we strive. The Bible makes a very strong statement regarding this in 1 Thessalonians 4:7-8, "God has called us to be holy, not to live impure lives. Anyone who refuses to live by these rules is not disobeying human rules but is rejecting God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you." If lust has not yet gripped your heart and mind, ready yourself through a life lived above reproach to combat the temptations of lust. If you currently struggle with lust, it is time to come clean before God and ask for His intervention in your life, so that holiness can be a mark of your life as well. End Article Written by Bethany Beal, LaTonya Taylor and Michael S. Houdmann Copyrights: © Copyright 2008-2019. All Rights Reserved. Lies Young Women Believe and Got Questions Ministries

I want to encourage you to be honest about your own struggles with lust. Whether they seem really small or really big, get serious about killing the lust in your heart. Here are two simple steps you can take to begin the process: 34 | Blessed Magazine

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?



38 | Blessed Magazine


Personal Wellness

A Battle to Overcome My Inferiority Complex

Written by Charis Petkau

“Everybody hates me, nobody likes me, I’m going to eat some worms.” We sang this little ditty at the top of our lungs as children. We thought it was such a funny song. As I became a teenager, I realized that it was easy to actually think this way. Not that I would eat worms! But when things didn’t go as I had thought or planned, or I was not invited to an event, it was easy to think that nobody liked me and that everything was against me. A Lurking Inferiority Complex 37 | Blessed Magazine


Personal Wellness As an adult, I realized that it was also easy to think that God was against me when things seemed to go “wrong” in my life. This doubting God’s love has plagued me for most of my life. I have used different verses to fight that have helped me get victory in specific situations, but this inferiority complex was always lurking in the background. The sneaky thing is that Satan comes as an angel of light. (2 Corinthians 11:14) He makes it seem “humble” to think that I am not liked or not good enough, or that I am not invited to different things because I don’t deserve any better. A few years ago, over a short period of time, I experienced several major events where I experienced loss, both in the form of loved ones and in the loss of the use of my right arm which also brought constant physical pain. I had the control and stubbornness to show a positive face to the others but inside I was crushed “This refers to the process in which God breaks down a person’s own selfrighteousness, strength, and pride so that they can come to a position of humility and obedience wherein He can use them to carry out His will. ...’’ I realized, after some time, that I had stopped believing that God loved me or cared for me at all. How could anyone who loved me let these things happen? Did God even exist? What had I done that was so bad that I deserved this kind of treatment? I felt that I was slowly being pulled into a deadly whirlpool of darkness and despair and I didn’t know how to get out. I was even losing the will to live – it was too hard and too painful and I felt so alone.

Verses Written Specifically For Me In the middle of this, a friend took the time to ask how I was really doing. He encouraged me and prayed for me and he gave me the verses in Isaiah 43:1-5. He made me promise to read these every single day and to put my name in there. I promised. And this is what I read: “But now, thus says the Lord, who created you, O (Charis), and He who formed you, O (Charis): ‘Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine (Charis). When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flames scorch you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I gave Egypt for your ransom, Ethiopia and Seba in your place. Since you were precious in My sight, you have been honored, and I have loved you; therefore I will give men for you, and people for your life. Fear not, for I am with you; I will bring your descendants from the east, and gather you from the west.’” I did read these verses every single day. At first, as I read them, I was wondering who they were written for because they surely weren’t for me. But I obediently kept reading them. Slowly, by God’s grace, faith started to grow and I realized that they were written specifically just for me. God loved me, He picked me; He actually really did! Yes, there would be times where I would go through water and fire, but He would be there with me, strengthening me. Freedom!!!

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Personal Wellness Then it hit me: this was my opportunity to get to the root of this giant of unbelief and inferiority that had plagued me my whole life, and really deal it a death blow. This whole situation was God’s mercy, so I could get free from the slavery and bondage and unhappiness that came with living with doubt. I had been feeling like Job, that everything was against me, but then the verse about Job in James 5:11 came to me: “Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord – that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful.” This came as a revelation to me: do I see the end intended by the Lord? Do I see that these situations that brought me to an end of myself and my own strength

my weapon and was the only thing that was effective against this giant of doubt. My own reasoning and thoughts were useless. I have peace inside now, because I am finally fully convinced that God loves me; that I am precious to Him and that He is controlling and arranging every small detail of my life for my very best. I have no fear for the future, because I know that God has control of it and that He will be with me to go through whatever the future holds. I know I am not completely finished with my inferiority complex yet, but it has lost its power and control over me, so it is only a matter of time. I am so thankful for God’s Word and the power it has over darkness, and thankful for the care and prayers of men and women of God. END

“This refers to a person who is attempting to put to death their sinful desires without help from God; not sinning by sheer strength of will. Some people may manage this to some degree, but ultimately it is impossible to ...” were actually the answer to my prayers that I wanted to be freed from doubt and serve God with my whole heart? These situations that I would have done anything to get out of, became the thing that saved my life. This was the end intended by the Lord. All these things were sent from God because He loved me and wanted me to become happy and free. But God wouldn’t make this happen magically; I had to face up to the truth and overcome these things that had bound me since my childhood. I had to fight: fight against doubt and unbelief and fight to believe in Romans 8:28. “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” God’s Word became 39 | Blessed Magazine




Relationships

The Husband List: 12 Non-Negotiables Article written by Kristen Wolfe

Many people use the fact that God already knows the desires of our hearts as an excuse not to pray. Although, he does know them, he still commands us to, “in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6. In the book of Mark, a blind man had his friends take him to Jesus to be healed for his eyesight. Yet when he got in front of Jesus, even though it was obvious what the blind man wanted, Jesus still asked him, “What do you want me to do for you?”

Therefore, even if you have a vision or idea of what your future husband will be like, it is important that you define the specific traits in your life partner. I was in a bible study where we were required to make a “husband list” for homework. It couldn’t just be a short list of the basics. We had to be specific. An example would be, “A man who has a calm temperament and handles stress well.” This may sound silly, but the reason it is important to put the important qualities you desire into writing is to hold you accountable. It also gives you heightened discernment in dating situations. Let’s be honest ladies, it can be easy to let something slide or dismiss a red flag when a cute guy tells us yummy, fluttery words we want to hear. But is it an ugly situation when we let our hearts get too wrapped up into someone who ultimately doesn’t care of it.

The list keeps your standards in check and can help you quickly discern whether or not that guy gets a second date. It protects your heart against unnecessary wear and tear. In fact, your heart is so important to God that He says, “Above all else, guard your heart for from it flows the wellspring of life.” Proverbs 4:23 I encourage each of you to make a husband list too. After I made mine, I met my husband 2 months later and not only was he every single character trait on that list, he was more. But I shouldn’t have been too surprised because, “God is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.” Ephesians 3:20. Now, each one of your lists is going to have unique things according to who you are, your quirks, likes and dislikes. But there are some fundamental traits that God wants to be nonnegotiables. Choosing who you will partner the rest of your life with is one of the biggest decisions you will ever make. Too many young women are settling for less than God’s best because they don’t know exactly how He

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Relationships expects His daughters to be treated. Based on scripture, here is a list of non-negotiables for you so you don’t have to second guess anymore. 1. He Is A Practicing Believer. - “Do not be yoked together with an unbeliever…For what agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?” 2 Corinthians 6:14-16. Issues and conflict are bound to rise in marriage, so it is crucial that there is a common foundation on which to hold the marriage accountable. The last thing you want to be fighting about is your faith, whether or not to pray and your viewpoints on religion. Believe me, I’ve been there before. It is exhausting. 2. God Is The Center Of His Life. - He seeks God’s wisdom in all the decisions he makes. “With wisdom are riches and honor, enduring wealth and prosperity. My fruit is better than fine gold; what I yield surpasses choice silver.” Proverbs 8:18-19 3. He Has Integrity And Does Not Put Himself In Tempting Situations. - He guards you against harm and protects the relationship. “Keep to a path far from evil, do not go near the door of that house, lest you give your best strength to others.” Proverbs 5:8-9 4. Seeks Mentorship And Counsel. - It is important that your man is wise in realizing he can’t carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. When he is surrounded by men who are older than him who can offer advice, prayer and mentorship, he can be a better husband to you. “The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.” Proverbs 12:15

5. He Is Slow To Anger. - There is peace in knowing your man holds an even temperament even when he is provoked. A man who allows his feelings, emotions and anger to determine his actions typically has tarnished relationships and is not a healthy place for you or a family. “A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel.” Proverbs 15:18 6. He Holds Strong Conviction On The Sacredness Of Fidelity.- A man is wise when he understand that infidelity and looking for pleasure outside of the marriage only brings strife. God actually calls him to rejoice over you all of his days. “May your fountain be blessed and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth…May you be ever captivated by her love. Why be captivated, my son, by an adulteress?” Proverbs 5:18-20. 7. He Is Honorable Of Your Heart And Emotional Well-being. - I hated when a guy I was dating exposed my embarrassing moments or the private matters of our relationship with his friends. Picking on you may seem cute and funny at first, but it will get old after a while. You should feel honored and safe knowing you can always trust your husband to cover and speak well of you. “Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers,” Proverbs 5:17. “Love each other deeply because love covers all wrongs.” 1 Peter 4:8. 8. He Is Disciplined In Living A Life Of Integrity. - Watch how he handles temptation or sticky situations that test his character. Does he choose to do what’s right even when no one is watching? It is imperative to observe these things because it will indicate if you can trust his decision making. When

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Relationships you’re married, almost all of his decisions impact you. “He will die for lack of discipline, led astray by his own great folly.” Proverbs 5:23 9. Has Solid Work Ethic. - “A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest- and poverty will come upon you like a thief and scarcity like an armed man.” Proverbs 6:10-11. 10. He Pursues And Loves You Passionately. The man you marry should make you feel loved like you’ve never felt before. Safe, accepted, desired, nurtured, protected and comforted. Jesus loves us deeply, he loves us so fiercely, that he willingly gave up his life to save us. Pursues: “So Jacob worked seven years to pay for Rachel. But his love for her was so strong that it seemed to him but a few days.” Genesis 29:20. Loves: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25. 11. Romances You. - I know women who feel guilty or wrong for desiring romance in their relationship, as if they don’t deserve it. But God desires for your heart to be romanced, just as He longs to romance us. “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— for your love is more delightful than wine.” Song of Solomon 1:2 “Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.” Song of Solomon 8:6.

man. “Pride comes before destruction, and an arrogant spirit before a fall.” Proverbs 16:18 No person will be perfect and grace is a beautiful thing that makes relationships flourish. That being said, this list for single ladies is to give a basic framework of character traits to look for or recognize whether or not there is desire for growth. Of course, use common sense when someone amazing walks in to your life but wasn’t exactly what you dreamed up. God surprises us, but always gives us what we need. “For I feel a divine jealousy for you, since I betrothed you to one husband…” 2 Corinthians 11:2. Ultimately, your divine Father wants you to be treated in a way that it is compared with how Christ cares for us. It is up to us though to believe we are worthy, set the standard, and have the faith that God works in perfect timing to introduce you to your husband. END

12. He Is Humble And Can Admit When He Is Wrong. - There is nothing worse than a petty conflict blowing out of proportion because your partner refuses to admit they were wrong. Taking responsibility for his actions and apologizing for his mistakes is the sign of a real 44 | Blessed Magazine




Relationships

Why Do So Many Women Show Off Cleavage in Church

Written by John Upchurch

My wife brought up the topic as we drove by cornfields on the way home from church. “You just can’t wear something like that on stage.” I knew exactly what she meant. During the worship set, one of the praise leaders wore a dress that covered about as much skin as a tight-fitting, low-cut swimsuit with a short skirt. Remembering the lessons from Every Young Man’s Battle, I’d locked my eyes on the praise lyrics or simply closed them so that I couldn’t see her.

might rather expect to see them wearing at a dance club on Saturday night. Their blouses cling to their bodies, their necklines dip so low and stretch so wide that they reveal cleavage, and the slits up the sides of their skirts offer more than an innocent glimpse of their thighs. Again, I’m not talking about sinners seeking God or new believers who plain don’t know better. I’m talking about those who claim to be "born-again, baptized, blood-bought" (even tongue-talking) members of the church!

Paul instructed Timothy that women should “When you dress like that,” my wife added, “adorn themselves in modest apparel, with “you take the focus off God and put it on propriety and moderation” (1 Tim. 2:9), and you. You’re undermining the whole reason he told the church at Corinth that “our we’re there.” unpresentable parts have greater modesty” (1 Cor. 12:23). Regardless of how hot it is Some women—and I am talking about so- outside or how busy we are, there’s no called "mature believers," not lost souls or justification for Spirit-filled women to come baby Christians—come into God’s sanctuary to church wearing clothes that cause some on Sunday morning wearing clothes you men to pay more attention to the things of the flesh than the things of the Spirit. 47 | Blessed Magazine


Relationships However, other Christian women think that such a push toward modesty is rooted in shaming the female members of a congregation. Using such slogans as “modest is hottest” makes women feel as if they are the root cause of temptation, rather than teaching them how to view themselves as beautifully made in God’s image. Last year, Sharon Hodde Miller suggested three ways to tackle the problem: How do we discuss modesty in a manner that celebrates the female body without objectifying women, and still exhorts women to purity? The first solution is to dispense with body-shaming language. Shame is great at behavior modification, even when the shaming is not overt. But shame-based language is not the rhetoric of Jesus. It is the rhetoric of his Enemy. Second, we must affirm the value of the female body. The value or meaning of a woman's body is not the reason for modesty. Women's bodies are not inherently distracting or tempting. On the contrary, women's bodies glorify God. Dare I say that a woman's breasts, hips, bottom, and lips all proclaim the glory of the Lord! Each womanly part honors Him. He created the female body, and it is good.

created role that is inherently God-centered. When we make ourselves central instead of God, we display the height of immodesty. Miller makes an important point here. The church must do a better job teaching a “theology” of the body that isn’t rooted in shame. We are all designed by God and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). Everything God gave women was created “very good” (Genesis 1:31). But at the same time, our fallen nature has impacted the way we (especially men) see women’s bodies. The flesh nature gets in the way of what was once a perfect posture of purity toward each other. While we’re no longer slaves to our sin nature (Romans 6:6), that doesn’t mean our minds don't harbor impurity (Romans 13:14). Both men and women must live and dress in ways that humbly help each other in our weaknesses (Galatians 5:13). In addition, we should also consider the motivations behind those who design such clothing. Are they making skin-baring outfits because they view women as God’s creation or are they doing so to exploit their bodies? END

Finally, language about modesty should focus not on hiding the female body but on understanding the body's created role. Immodesty is not the improper exposure of the body per se, but the improper orientation of the body. Men and women are urged to pursue a modesty by which our glory is minimized and God's is maximized. The body, the spirit and the mind all have a 48 | Blessed Magazine


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Relationships

No Boyfriend?

Article By Paula Marsteller

What’s Wrong with You? I’m twenty-three and have never dated anyone. I honestly feel like the weirdest, ugliest girl in the world, and all I can do is question what’s wrong with me. I feel if I was pretty like other girls or more dateable, I wouldn’t be single. And quite frankly, sometimes I even question if I’m worthy of being loved or if I’m so horrible I can’t even be liked. I know life shouldn’t just be about dating, but it’s so awkward when all your friends are or have been in relationships, and you’re just there thinking, It must be because I’m ugly. I’ve come to hate everything about my physical appearance. It’s like my whole youth has passed me by. Because even when I’ve had any crush, they wouldn’t even notice me. I’ve now come to the point of thinking maybe love isn’t for everyone, but I don’t know how well I can accept it.

Single Girl, Nothing Is Wrong With You. Not In The Way You Think, Anyway. 51 | Blessed Magazine


Relationships Nothing is wrong with being twenty-three and not having dated. In fact, you have the advantage, in my opinion. My hubby was twenty-six when we started dating. Until I came along, he had never had a girlfriend. That wasn’t weird to me. It was pure relief! If you read this blog often, you know my story. While I always had a crush on someone, I was boyfriend-less from ages sixteen to thirty—well over a decade. Do I look back and regret the fact that I didn’t have a boyfriend during those long years? No way!

time of singleness is valuable. I can hear you protesting, “That’s all good if someone eventually pursues you, but no guy will ever like me. I’m too ugly.” If you’ve been telling yourself over and over that you’re ugly, why would one guy telling you you’re not ugly change your mind?

It wouldn’t. You need to choose to believe what is true about yourself before you put a poor boyfriend or husband in the impossible position of convincing you otherwise.

Let me try to give you a little perspective. You are beautiful. Having a boyfriend, dating, is a fairly recent phenomenon in our culture. But marriage was God’s design from the beginning of creation: one man and one woman exclusively committed to each other until death parts them. It’s okay—wonderful, in my opinion— if you don’t drag a string of old boyfriends into this lifelong covenant.

Also, if you’re not dating, you’re saving yourself a whole lot of temptation, as the world claims that boyfriends and girlfriends get to enjoy all the benefits of marriage, but God’s Word doesn’t back this up. And then there’s the fact that you grow and mature so much in your twenties. You learn who you are, what you believe, what you stand for, what you actually want in a lifelong partner. This

How can I know this, as I’ve personally never laid eyes on you? Because I know that God, the ultimate source of beauty, made you. And God doesn’t make junk. I was in your shoes once. You can read all about it in my book, Confessions of a Boy Crazy Girl. A guy who led me on for over a year and a half finally admitted why he hadn’t officially asked me to be his girlfriend: “The spark comes and goes.” With that admission, the Liar (Satan) lodged a big, hairy lie deep within me: “You’re just not beautiful.” That lie rang in my ears for months. Until one morning when I lifted the bathroom blinds. The beauty before me nearly took my breath away—this delicate, purple flowering

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Relationships tree reaching up, up, up. While washing my face and combing my hair, I kept glancing at its beauty, drinking it in.

That’s when I saw it. You make beautiful things, God. At that moment, I chose to stop listening to Satan’s lies and to believe that my Creator had not made me ugly. As I write this post, I’m sitting in my backyard surrounded by wildflowers, vegetables, a Rose of Sharon bush, and decorative grasses. Each plant is different from the others, but I would never call anything surrounding me ugly! God doesn’t do ugly.

with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets” (Matt. 22:37–40). This is what you were made for: to love as God has loved you. And ironically, as you shift your focus from yourself to God and others, this is what will put your beauty on full display.

God made you, and you are not His one mistake. May I challenge you to repent of believing this lie? Even if you don’t yet feel beautiful, agree with God that “I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well” (Ps. 139:14).

Image Shared From PMS.ORG. UK

So how about it, beautiful girl? Will you choose to believe that God makes beautiful things—including you?! (If you doubt this, I challenge you to take a walk outdoors for a glimpse of His beautiful world!) Also, I need to ask, is being loved more important to you than loving God and others? If so, will you confess this as sin to God and ask for His help to keep the greatest commandment?

Then I challenge you to change your focus—not on being loved but on loving God and others. After all, Jesus said that this is the greatest commandment in the There is nothing wrong with you, single girl. law: Go live beautifully. END © Copyright 2008-2019. All Rights Reserved.

“You shall love the Lord your God with Lies Young Women Believe all your heart and with all your soul and 53 | Blessed Magazine



Relationships

Dad 101: How to Step Up Your Game in 10 Steps

Written By Doyin Richards

Just like most bloggers, I receive a lot of email at Daddy Doin’ Work. I do my best to read all of them and reply to the ones that I can, but doing so takes a lot longer than I expected. As I sit here now, I realize that many of the emails I received asked a common question: “WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR A NEW DAD?” I can’t say that I have all of the answers, but I’ll gladly share what works for me in the hopes that it will work for you. 55 | Blessed Magazine


Relationships Keep in mind, none of what you’ll read here is earth-shattering or profound stuff, but it’s what I swear by as a Daddy Doin’ Work. #1 – Be there when your wife/girlfriend gives birth: And when I say “be there,” I don’t mean being in the hospital’s waiting room. I mean, being there in the delivery room with your lady as she brings a baby into the world. This should be a no-brainer, but I keep hearing about dudes who are “grossed out” by the whole experience. Fair enough. I’ll be real with you here – nothing is beautiful about the act of childbirth. With bodily fluids and other things flowing everywhere it was probably one of the most disturbing things I’ve ever witnessed in my lifetime. However (yes, there’s a however), my wife never would’ve known that. The day your child is born is never about you and your feelings. It’s about your wife/girlfriend and baby, period. Be present, don’t give her any advice, let her curse you out (if that’s how she rolls), and do whatever she asks of you without complaint. #2 – Step your game up: It’s important for a

man to step his game up for his wife/girlfriend after delivering a baby. She spent hours pushing an 8-pound human through a small opening or she had her abdominal wall sliced open during a major surgical procedure. She’s exhausted, she’s in pain, and she needs time to heal. That’s when a man has to go above and beyond. He has to change diapers, give baths, make his wife food (or bring his wife food), and offer support without being asked to do so. Whatever a man was doing before his baby arrived just won’t cut it now. His wife and baby needs him more than ever, and he can’t let them down. #3 – Hold your child often: As many of you know by now, I’m big on baby-wearing. As a matter of fact, other than the days when I was traveling out of town for some reason, there hasn’t been a day when I haven’t worn my daughters in the Ergo. Your child can learn your smell, your voice, your mannerisms, and everything about you. Not to mention, doing so will create a happier, healthier, and more confident child – and what’s better than that? An extra perk is your lady will probably think that a baby-wearing daddy is damn sexy.

#4 – Have zero-technology hours: Once a baby comes into the picture, life becomes extremely fast-paced and it almost seems as if you have zero time to yourself anymore. It’s not rare to feed your baby a bottle with one hand while you send an important email with the other. Sure, multitasking is unavoidable when you become a parent, but take a moment to slooooow down. Find a time during each day when you put the iPhone or computer away – and don’t check (With my younger daughter Reiko on her birth day.)

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Relationships Twitter, Facebook, or email. During that time, give your child 100% of your attention. In doing so, you’ll find that it will be the best time during the entire day.

(Just you and me, baby girl.)

#5 – Don’t bring baggage home with you: You had a horrible day at the office. Your boss chewed you out. You got stuck in horrific traffic. You repeated your lunch order to the restaurant cashier THREE TIMES and he still messed it up. The bottom line is you’re really upset. I’ll offer this piece of advice to any new parent: do whatever the hell you need to do to get over it before you walk through the front door. Go to the gym, sit in your car for twenty minutes and yell, call your best friend, meditate, whatever. Just don’t bring that negative energy with you inside. Your baby doesn’t understand what adult life is like. He/she only wants daddy to be present and attentive.

#6 – Don’t collect things. Create memories: I see a lot of new parents focusing on buying the most expensive clothes, toys, and gadgets for their kids.

That’s completely fine by me, and if they can afford it, go for it. I operate a little differently. When my family spends big money on things for our kids, it's always for things that create lasting memories. For example, we went to Hawaii recently and anyone who vacations there understands how ridiculously expensive it is. For months we saved our money and cut back on a lot of stuff just so our trip would be epic. And it was. Although my daughters are 4-years old and 18-months old respectively, they will have literally thousands of pictures and videos to go through from that vacation and other excursions when they’re older. In twenty years from now, will they (or anyone else) care that I bought their shoes at Payless instead of Bloomingdales? Of course not. Creating memories for the win, man. Oh, and if you’re going to spend big money on any material item, be sure it’s for a really good camera. #7 – Take lots of pictures: Speaking of pictures, here’s something I did with both of my daughters. My oldest daughter was born on a Sunday and every Sunday for the first year of her life I took a photo of her and placed it into a folder called “Sunday Pictures.” I also labeled the weeks accordingly (week 1, week 2, week 3, etc.) to ensure I kept everything organized. When her first birthday arrived, I played a 52-picture slideshow illustrating the week-to-week transformation of my daughter and it was absolutely breathtaking. I cannot stress this enough – if you’re expecting a baby, do this. You will not be sorry. My youngest daughter was born on a Tuesday and we did the same thing for her first year. Yep, you guessed it, the experience

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Relationships was equally as breathtaking. When you’re dead and gone, pictures and videos will be the primary way your kids will remember you. Take photos until your hands fall off. #8 – Have Daddy-baby time: Don’t get me wrong here – spending time together as a complete family is really important, but it’s also important to create a Daddy-baby ritual with your kids. For me, I would spend at least an hour a day with my baby in a baby carrier. That was our time for bonding. With my 4-year old, we go to swim lessons together every Sunday – just the two of us. It’s something we both look forward to and enjoy. Whatever it is (story time, playground time, bath time, feedings, etc.) find something that only you and your baby do together. It will only intensify your bond.

#9 – Choose your friends wisely: So you know that buddy of yours who thinks it’s cool to play a round of Edward Fortyhands on a random Tuesday night? Or what about the 38-year old guy who spends his free time at the club trying to pick up 22-year old girls? You may want to think twice about bringing them around your kids. It’s not that they’re horrible people, it’s just that you’ve outgrown the foolishness they partake in. Your priority is with your family and anything that takes away from that needs to be ruthlessly eliminated. Besides, there are many great dads out there to spend time with who get what you’re going through as a new dad. Hang out with those guys. #10 – Trust your gut: People (including me, with my nine aforementioned points) will try to give you advice. Some of it will be really good. Some of it will make you question the sanity of the folks providing it. At the end of

the day, we have our intuition to guide us through life as parents. Don’t spend time listening to so-called “parenting experts.” I’m not a parenting expert and let's face it neither are you. What works for my kids may not work for yours and vice versa. That’s okay. Your gut will never let you down when it comes to being a Daddy Doin’ Work, I promise you.

(Loving the dad life with my little sidekick!)

This post comes from the TODAY Parenting Team community, where all members are welcome to post and discuss parenting solutions. Learn more and join us! Because we're all in this together. END

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

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Relationships

Written by Jemima Mayers

As all structures that have a strong foundation are able to endure all kinds of weathering, similarly families that have a foundation built on trust, love and compassion are able to sail through every difficulty and yet stand strong as a unit. Parents who follow these basic ideologies often have families that are well knit and content: 1. Communicate: In a family, it is important ‘to listen and be listened to’. Every member of the family should feel at ease in communicating with each other, be it success

or failure. Especially children feel secure and loved if they know they can share their feelings. Communication gap leads to misunderstandings, boredom and distrust and can shake the foundation of a family. 2. Spend Quality Time: A family that spends quality time together regularly creates a time for the family to bond, connect and talk about important issues and encourages healthy living. If you have young children at home, read stories aloud to them, or listen to audiobooks, or read individually and spend some time writing – maintain a diary, reading and writing will limit time in front of the T.V. and computer.

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Relationships and computer.

3. Togetherness – Like the Von Trapp family, a family that sings and dances together stays together. Celebrate, just being together! Involve everyone in the household and make everyday chores fun. Put on the music while doing the laundry, encourage them to make their beds and fold and keep their clothes while dancing to the beat of the music. To instill healthy eating habits and make cooking fun, parents and children can cook together sometimes. Snack on cut up veggies and fruits, or dried fruits and nuts. Avoid too sugary or salty processed foods that can wreak havoc with your family’s health and moods. 4. Exercise, Play and Have fun together: Parents can join an aerobics or yoga class together with their kids, or exercise with the demo video running. Better still is to get some fresh air to get the heart working – take a walk, a bike ride, jump a rope, rollerblade, play basketball or soccer. If you have a pool nearby, swimming is a good option. Having fun while gardening, plotting surprise parties, laughing out during pillow fights or water-fights infuses a sense of joy, reduces stress and creates fond memories.

5. Instill Good Morals and Values: ‘You reap what you sow’- so if you as parents inculcate respect, sharing, caring and spirituality instead of giving more importance to materialistic things, you will have a family bond that’s hard to break even in times of adversity. Discuss ideas instead of people, discourage feelings of envy, resentment and focus more on internal beauty than physical appearance.

(Image Source: YEG Fitness)

6. Make your home a safe haven, a sanctuary where all family members can come to when they are physically and emotionally tired, where they can feel protected and revive to face the world’s challenges. Be there for your spouse and kids, do not overwork, maintain harmony with your spouse and do not fight over finances or raise your voices especially in front of kids. Children learn from what they witness so it is very important to be a role model for them, demonstrate your love for each other, this goes a long way in making a child emotionally stable.

7. Appreciate and Reward: It’s important to make 61 | Blessed Magazine


Relationships make every member of the family feel special and valued. Take out a one-to-one time with every child, even if it is for 10 minutes, daily. Celebrate their successes, talents and remember birthdays and anniversaries and exchange gifts. Plan outings together as a family. 8. Make routines, set boundaries yet be flexible: Discipline at home can work wonders on your mood as you will be able to manage your responsibilities and also get some time for yourself. When things run smoothly, there are less chances of arguments and disagreements. However, a little flexibility can create the much needed space that all members need.

snuggle in their parent’s beds when reading, watching a movie or while talking and playing. It gives a sense of warmth, affection and being loved and melts away the stress of the day. Habits like these are what healthy families are made of, from spending quality time together, love and be loved, discipline and values to being there for each other in every up and down of life. END

Finally, cuddle and snuggle: Physical touch creates a sense of security and good feeling among family members. Children love to

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Also in this issue

‘Cinching That Waist!’ Written By A. Pawlowski

10 Small Food Changes That May Make A Big Difference In Your Waistline Eating is such a basic and pleasurable part of our lives that we often do it mindlessly. Pay a little more attention and you might find you’re much more in control of how much you consume than you think. You'll also discover how much things around you — like plate size — can influence your food decisions. Little changes can mean a big difference for your waist line — something that fascinates researchers at the Cornell University Food and Brand Lab.

Association for Consumer Research. Here are 10 insights that could change your eating habits: 1.

Skip A Meal If You’re Not Particularly Hungry

Are you heading for the fridge because your stomach is growling or just because you’re bored? Try to listen to your body. Eating when you’re not hungry causes your blood sugar to spike, which is not healthy. 2.

Be Careful Around “Healthy” Food Labels.

They released a host of findings as part of People tend to overeat food described as “The Behavioral Science of Eating” in the “healthy” because they think it’s less filling than January 2016 issue of the Journal of the “unhealthy” choices. Knowing this, pay attention Association for Consumer Research. 66 | Blessed Magazine


Also in this issue to the recommended serving size and don’t overload your plate.

percent more of them. Make healthy side dishes a default in your own kitchen.

3. Install Mirrors Where You Eat

6. Read Nutrition Labels Carefully.

It turns out watching yourself devour chocolate cake makes the treat less tasty compared to eating it in a room where you can’t see your reflection. Mirrors in the kitchen and dining room add a bit of discomfort if you’re overindulging, but don’t change the taste of healthy food, researchers found.

Don't be seduced by a tasty treat that hides its true calorie count in a very small recommended serving size. Once you start, will you really stop yourself at two pieces or one thin slice? “Smaller recommended serving sizes will let all nutrition values on the label appear smaller too,” says lead author Dr. Ossama Elshiewy from the University of Goettingen. That can lead to overeating. 7. Use Smaller Plates. Halving plate size meant people ate 30 percent less food on average. This works best if you’re serving yourself, whether at a buffet or out of larger dishes on the dinner table. 8.

Eat the chocolate cake in front of a mirror and you'll eat less. Image Source: Shutterstock

4.

Healthy Meals Can Take A Cue From “Happy Meals”.

In experiments, adults and children would rather eat a smaller portion of food paired with a toy or gift card than opt for a larger meal without a prize. Brain scans showed they responded to the prize in the same way they reacted to additional food.

You’ll Eat Less From A Less Fancy Plate.

We tend to throw away more food when we eat from paper plates than when we use ceramic dishware. Researchers think this is because we tend to associate food on disposable plates as more disposable, too. No one wants to waste food, but this research shows plate material plays a role in our consumption habits.

5. Take A Hint From Disney’s Influence On Diners. When fruits and vegetables became default side dishes for kids’ meals at Walt Disney World restaurants, diners ate at least 11 67 | Blessed Magazine

Image Source: Buzzfeed


Also in this issue 9. Choose A Fork Over A Spoon

the myth to avoid causing unnecessary alarm. END

This simple change can make a difference in how much you eat. People perceive a food as lower in calories and they want more of it when they eat it with a spoon than a fork. When it doubt, go for the fork!

Believe it or not, you'll eat less with a fork than a spoon. Image Source: Shutterstock

10. Avoid Negative Messages. Dieters who watched a “food police”-style video that bluntly told them “All sugary snacks are bad” ate 39 percent more cookies than those who saw a more positive clip. A gentler combination of negative and positive messages about food has a better effect, researchers say. END

68 | Blessed Magazine



Also in this issue

7 Low-Carb Meals in Under 10 Minutes Written by Kris Gunnars, BSc

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A low-carb diet can offer many health benefits, but you may struggle to come up with meal ideas that fit your busy schedule. Even if you’re not the most creative person in the kitchen and only have a few ingredients at hand, it’s easy to make tasty, low-carb meals that require fewer than 10 minutes of prep time.

Also in this issue Grilled Chicken Wings With Greens and Salsa

All the meals are low-carb and weight-lossfriendly.

Eggs and Vegetables Fried in Coconut Oil This dish makes for a great breakfast that you can enjoy every day. It’s rich in protein and healthy vegetables, keeping you full for a long time. Ingredients: Coconut oil, fresh vegetables or frozen vegetable mix (carrots, cauliflower, broccoli, green beans), eggs, spices, spinach (optional).

This one may just become one of your favorites. It takes little prep, and most people love to eat meat straight off the bone — you may even find it meets your kid’s approval. Ingredients: Chicken wings, spices, greens, salsa. Instructions:

Instructions: 1. 1. 2.

3. 4. 5. 6.

Add coconut oil to your frying pan and turn up the heat. Add vegetables. If you use a frozen mix, let the vegetables thaw in the heat for a few minutes. Add 3–4 eggs. Add spices — either a blend or simply salt and pepper. Add spinach (optional). Stir-fry until ready.

2. 3. 4.

Rub the chicken wings in a spice blend of your choice. Place them in the oven and heat at 360– 395°F (180–200°C) for about 40 minutes. Grill until the wings are brown and crunchy. Serve with some greens and salsa.

Ground Beef With Sliced Bell Peppers

71 | Blessed Magazine


Also in this issue This low-carb meal is perfect if you have some spare ground beef laying around. Ingredients: Onion, coconut oil, ground beef, spices, spinach, and one bell pepper.

side of raw spinach. Ingredients: Butter, hamburger patties, cheddar cheese, cream cheese, salsa, spices, spinach. Instructions:

Instructions: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.

8.

Finely chop an onion. Add coconut oil to a pan and turn up the heat. Add the onion and stir for a minute or two. Add the ground beef. Add some spices — either a blend or simply salt and pepper. Add spinach. If you want to spice things up a bit, optionally add some black pepper and chili powder. Stir-fry until ready and serve with a sliced bell pepper.

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

7.

Add butter to a pan and turn up the heat. Add the hamburger patties and spices. Flip the patties until close to being ready. Add a few slices of cheddar and some cream cheese on top. Reduce the heat and put a lid on the pan until the cheese melts. Serve with raw spinach. You can drizzle some of the fat from the pan over your greens, if you like. To make the burgers even juicier, add some salsa.

Bacon and Eggs Though bacon is a processed meat and not exactly healthy, it is low in carbs. You can eat it on a low-carb diet and still lose weight. If you keep your bacon intake in moderation and don’t eat it more than once or twice per week, there’s nothing wrong with adding it to your diet. Ingredients: Bacon, eggs, spices (optional).

Bunless Cheeseburgers

Instructions: 1. 2.

Add bacon to a pan and fry until ready. Put the bacon on a plate and fry 3–4 eggs It doesn’t get much easier than this: a bunless in the bacon fat. burger with two different kinds of cheese and a 3. If you want to add some flavor to your eggs, 72 | Blessed Magazine


Also in this issue eggs, put a bit of sea salt, garlic powder, and onion powder on them while frying.

Ingredients: Onions, bacon, ground beef, salsa, spices, garlic powder, and shredded cheese.

Fried Pieces of Chicken Breast

Instructions: 1.

2. If you’re worried about ending up with tasteless, dry chicken, adding some butter may do the trick. Ingredients: Chicken breast, butter, salt, pepper, curry, garlic powder, and leafy greens.

3. 4.

Finely chop your onions and cut some of the bacon into small slices. Mix the ground beef, salsa, onions, spices, and garlic powder at the bottom of a baking dish. Sprinkle shredded cheese on top and cover with additional bacon slices Place in the oven and heat at 360–395°F (180–200°C) for 30–40 minutes, until the bacon and cheese look crunchy.

Instructions:

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Cut the chicken breast into small pieces. Add butter to a pan and turn up the heat. Add chicken pieces, as well as salt, pepper, curry, and garlic powder. Brown the chicken until it reaches a crunchy texture. Serve with some leafy greens.

Meatza – Meat Based ‘Pizza’ Which one are you going to try first? END If you miss pizza on your low-carb diet, then you're going to love this. You may just find it tastes even better — without the unhealthy ingredients many pizza varieties include.

This recipe is easy to modify, and you can add any low-carb ingredients you want — vegetables, mushrooms, different cheeses, and so on. 73 | Blessed Magazine




Jesus Will Never Leave You! If you haven’t discovered Jesus as your personal savior and would like to get to know Him today; please click the button below for a free e-book from our friends at Guideposts titled

‘How to Make Jesus Your Best Friend’


Also in this issue

From Death to Life

This statue shows a Christian woman who is old at death's door. As she passes from this life to the next, she is no longer sick or old and does not carry the burdens of this mortal life. She is welcomed by her Savior into eternal life whole and strong to live forever in heaven. What a promise, what joy unspeakable! Shared From Anne Brown - https://www.facebook.com/annie.brown.98478672

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Also in this issue

Rise Up Going through the motions living life every day, Looking for some devotion needing God in every way. Wanting so bad to change things, things I don’t understand, Asking God can you please tell me is this a part of your plan? Softly the wind starts blowing, and I can here His sweet voice , Saying rise up my child you can do this, with Me you have a choice. With God I know I can rise up, things will get better every day, All I have to do is keep praying as I walk in His ways. Just knowing that He loves me gives me the strength to go on, Rise up my child I hear Him calling, with Me is where you belong. God gives me a reason to keep trying, He has a purpose for me, Patience my child I hear Him whisper in my time you will see. With hope in my heart I will rise up, I have so much to look forward to, There’s so many things in this life, that with God I know I can do.

Written By Eva Dimel Inspired By God ©

79 | Blessed Magazine


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