August/September, 2017 by Blessed Magazine Ministries

Help for When You Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Feel Love for God Anymore

August/September, 2017

Mind Wars:a Developing Defending Passion forAgainst Demonic Voices in Jesus Your Head

M A G A Z I N E

Should a Christian Pursue Modeling?

Sinful Impulses How to Control Them

God! What Do You Want From Me? Spousal Abuse! Is this an Acceptable Reason for Divorce? Artificial Insemination Are We Trying to Play God?

Christians & Nightclubs Is Clubbing a Sin?

What are the Guidelines for Christian Couples on Sex?

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What Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;ll Find Insideâ&#x20AC;Ś. Packed with inspirational articles to educate, encourage, inspire and uplift, recipes, diet advice, health, beauty, nutrition and fitness, Blessed Magazine is the ultimate companion for individuals who want to look great, feel fabulous and enjoy the benefits of a healthy, spiritual life.

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Contents August/September, 2017

Inside This Issue

 Developing a Passion for Jesus – 35  Sinful Impulses. How to Control 35 Them – 38  Help for When You Don‟t Feel Love for God Anymore – 41  God! What Do You Want from Me? – 47

Relationships:  Spousal Abuse! Is this an Acceptable 51 Reason for Divorce? – 51  What are the Guidelines for Christian Couples on Sex? – 56

Photo Courtesy of Shutterstock 515126470

Spiritual Wellness:

Personal Wellness:  Should a Christian Pursue Modeling? 59 – 59  Christians and Nightclubs. Is Clubbing a Sin? – 63

Feature Story: 71  Artificial Insemination. Are We Trying to Play God? - 71

16 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

Cover Photo Shutterstock 515126470

Also in this issueâ&#x20AC;Ś 21 28 73 75

Letter from the Editor How to Stretch Your Beauty Dollar Round the Clock Entertainment Just For Fun

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

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HELP SAVE MY CHILD! PLEASE SHARE EVERYWHERE

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Any Attorneys who would kindly help this family in need of assistance to get their little boy back is encouraged to contact Mr. Keathley

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Editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Corner

First, I always give all glory and honor to my Lord Jesus Christ for without Him in my life, nothing I could ever do would amount to anything! As Summer is dwindling down, I pray everyone has been safe and blessed. There are so many individuals who have questions about their walk with the Lord and we strive to answer those questions through articles we post within this publication. But allow me to also offer a sound word of advise; seek the Lord. He is always willing to answer your questions because He loves you so much! I want to personally thank all of our fans and readers for their continued support of this ministry which has continued to strive and for that I am grateful to our Lord, Jesus Christ Our goal is to continue being a resource for Christians and others for years to come and with your support we can keep this publication available free of charge always on our digital platform

Pray for us as we continue to pray for you and thank you for reading this issue of Blessed Magazine God bless you! Your Humble Servant in Christ,

Laraine Turner Editor-in-Chief

Letter From the Editor

Praise the Lord My Brothers and Sisters in Christ!

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 21

22 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

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Embracing Singleness and Loneliness This booklet is compiled with inspirations to encourage you while embracing the Lord through those periods of single and loneliness

Click Here To Download Your eBook If I could give this eBook 10 stars I would because it has been an eye opener for me. I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know how to fully cope with being a single male and the ache of loneliness, but this book has inspired me to pray more and seek the face of God. Thank you Blessed Magazineâ&#x20AC;Ś..Thomas Y.

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BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

HOW TO STRETCH

YOUR BEAUTY DOLLAR! We show you how to get the most bang for your buck with these penny-pinching beauty hacks BY EMILY WOODRUFF 28 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

All Your Money Goes to Your Gel Mani Fund The Cost: Salon gel manicures cost roughly $40.

How to Stretch It: Invest in an at-home gel manicure kit. To get that professional, I-paid-big-money-for-these look, follow this advice from China Glaze educator Sreynin Peng: -Lay the brush down on the nail bed with a bit of room so you can push the brush as close as possible to the cuticle without touching the cuticle. -Pull the product down towards the tip, covering the nail bed completely, then cap the free edge to finish. -Fix smudges before applying and curing the top coat. Once you fix it, recap free edge and cure. Total Savings: Salon gel manicures last about two weeks. If you get your digits lacquered twice monthly, you spend $960 per year on gel manicures -- yikes. If you switch to at-home gel manicures, you spend about $65 for the LED light and starter kit and $11.99 for every bottle of polish and top coat. That's a savings of $870 initially and over $900 once you factor out the one-time cost of the LED light.

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 29

BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

Your Tan is Golden, Your Bank Account is Not The Cost: A spray tan by a machine costs about $25 to $50 and lasts up to one week. If you want it done by hand (which usually yields better results), then you pay $65 to $90.

How to Stretch It: To make your tan last longer between sprays, Natalie and Celene Gee, owners of Gee Beauty, say that prep is key. Buff your skin pre-spray with a grainy scrub, like one of our top-rated body scrubs. Other tips: -Don't bathe or sweat for eight to 12 hours after your spray tan -- the tan is still setting during this time and will be washed off if it gets wet. -Lightly exfoliate after the third day of your spray tan to keep the tan even. -Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize! A spray tan lasts longer on wellhydrated skin. -Avoid products with mineral oils or alcohol, as they fade that bronze-y glow. -Invest in an at-home product to keep your tan going for an extra week. Total Savings: With these tips, your tan will last two weeks instead of one. If you tan weekly, you'll save $50 to $180 dollars per month -- that's $600 to $2,160 per year. 30 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

You Die Over Your Hair Dye Bill The Cost: While hair coloring varies largely based on the process, location and salon, it's safe to say that a single process without any repair or add-ons is going to run you about $70.

Total Savings: If you get your hair done every two months, you spend about $420 per year -- and that's just if you get the no-frills, single process. If you cut back to twice-yearly, lowmaintenance dye jobs, you'll save about $220 per year.

Source: Michael Caulfield/Getty Images North America

How to Stretch It: Ask your stylist for advice on how to find the right color for in-between visits to the salon. Shaun Surething, lead stylist and co-owner of Seagull Salon in New York City, says that he mixes a custom at-home hair dye for his clients who want to get their hair professionally colored only once or twice a year. "Any reasonable colorist will formulate one for you," he says. Surething recommends this option only for those who need to cover grays and their roots -- not all-over dye jobs. When you do go for color, ask for balayage highlights, ombrĂŠ or dip dye -- lowmaintenance (and trendy) dye jobs that you have to touch up only once or twice a year. If you want all-over highlights, Surething suggests that you ask for them to be placed underneath your part rather than at the top of the crown. That way, you won't sport a telltale line of regrowth after two months.

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 31

BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

You Sign Your Paycheck Over to the Makeup Counter The Cost: Department store makeup doesn't come cheap. Those goldplated tubes of lipstick typically cost $20 to $30. High-end foundation averages $40 to $100. Anti-aging lotions and potions sport the highest price tags, starting at about $30 and shooting up to $300 or $400 -- and if you crave the really luxe stuff, it's possible to spend as much as $1,000 on prestige skin cream. How to Stretch It: Shop smart. According to cosmetic chemist Ron Robinson, "luxury" makeup and skin care products are often smoke and mirrors. "[Drugstore] facial cleansers and toners use similar ingredients as [products sold at] department stores," he says. As for makeup, Robinson says you ought to save on mascara, since formulations don't vary much from department store to drugstore. "Some department store brands actually try to copy drugstore brands," he says. Total Savings: Considering you're supposed to replace your mascara every three months, you can save $60 to $132 per year. Drugstore cleansers and toners usually cost less than half the price of similar department store products, so you can cut that expense in half -- probably a savings of at least $60 per year on those two products alone. For example, if you switch from Philosophy Purity Made Simple Cleanser, $23, to Neutrogena Naturals Purifying Facial Cleanser, $7.49, you'll save almost $50 if you're replacing it three times a year. Make similar swaps with your toner, moisturizer, eye cream, etc., and the savings will continue to add up. 32 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

Haircut? More Like Pay Cut The Cost: For most of us, haircuts cost about $40 to $100.

How to Stretch It: To cut down on salon visits, Surething says the one cut you should avoid at all costs is a blunt, A-line bob. Ask for something low-maintenance and layered, like a long or medium shag. No matter what length you decide, says celebrity stylist Lee Rittiner, you should never ask for bangs. "You always have to style bangs," says Rittiner, which means frequent trips back to the salon for trims. If you're a devoted member of the bangs society and simply will not give them up, try cutting them on your own. Rittiner suggests trimming bangs by holding your shears vertically, so the point is going into your fringe. "Never, ever cut a blunt line," he says. Surething says to separate the bangs into small pieces, cutting into them vertically (no more than 1/4") with thinning shears from the middle and working your way out.

Total Savings: By getting a lowmaintenance cut that only needs updating twice a year rather than every two months, you'll save $160 to $400.

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 33

BEAUTY BUYS 4 YOU

You Subsist on Ramen to Fund Your Massage Addiction The Cost: Hour-long massages are usually $70 to $100.

How to Stretch It: Massages might seem mandatory after a long week, but their three-figure prices have a disappearing effect on your paycheck. For a cheap rubdown, find a massage school in your area. To get an official license as a massage therapist, students need to complete about 200 hours of therapy, so they're always looking for a pair of tight shoulders to rub. Most are about $25 per hour, with discounts for seniors and students. Check out the Natural Healer's website for a full list of massage schools around the country. www.naturalhealers.com Total Savings: $45 to $75 per massage

34 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

Spiritual Wellness

Developing a Passion for Jesus By S. Michael Houdman

To grow in love with God, one needs to get to know Him. He has revealed Himself in nature (Romans 1), but so much more through His Word. We need to make daily Bible study a perpetual habit as much a part of our lives as eating every day. We would do well to remember that the Bible is more than a book; it is truly God's love letter to us, revealing His love for us through the centuries, especially through the ministry of Jesus Christ, His Son. We must read the Bible as a letter from Him, asking His Holy Spirit to speak to our hearts about what He wants us to glean from it that day. Memorizing important verses and passages is also essential, as is thinking of ways to apply what we learn (Joshua 1:8) Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 35

Spiritual Wellness This question fits right in with God's greatest commandment, found in Deuteronomy 6:4-5, to love our God with all of our being. Here is some guidance in how to bring that about from Scripture: 1) It goes without saying that we cannot love someone we do not know. Get to know God and what He has done for you. Before the command to love God is given in Deuteronomy 6:5, the statement is made, "Hear O Israel, The LORD our God is one LORD." One aspect of this statement is that He is unique, and the better we get to know what He is like, the easier it will be for us to love Him with our whole being. This also involves getting to know what He has done for us. Again, before the first command is given in Exodus 20:3, God states what He had done for Israel in bringing them out of slavery in Egypt. Likewise, in Romans 12:1-2, the command to offer our lives as living sacrifices is prefaced with the word therefore--a word meant to remind us of all of the mercies of God toward us recorded in the previous chapters. To grow in love with God, one needs to get to know Him. He has revealed Himself in nature (Romans 1), but so much more through His Word. We need to make daily Bible study a perpetual habit as much a part of our lives as eating every day. We would do well to remember that the Bible is more than a book; it is truly God's love letter to us, revealing His love for us through the centuries, especially through

36 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

the ministry of Jesus Christ, His Son. We must read the Bible as a letter from Him, asking His Holy Spirit to speak to our hearts about what He wants us to glean from it that day. Memorizing important verses and passages is also essential, as is thinking of ways to apply what we learn (Joshua 1:8). 2) Follow Jesus' example of praying constantly and consistently. When we examine the life of Jesus as well as that of Daniel and others who had a passion for God, we find that prayer was a vital ingredient in their relationships with God (even a quick reading of the gospels and the Book of Daniel reveals this). As with Bible study, prayer, sincere and open communication with God is essential. You cannot imagine a man and woman growing in love without communicating, so prayer cannot be neglected without expecting one's love for God to grow cold. Prayer is part of the armor against our greatest enemies (Ephesians 6:18). We may have a desire to love God, but we will fail in our walk without prayer (Matthew 26:41). 3) Walk closely with Him NOW. Daniel and his three friends chose to obey God and refused to compromise in even the food they ate (Daniel 1). The others who were brought from Judah to Babylon as prisoners with them caved in and are never mentioned again. When the Jewish prisoners of war had their convictions challenged in a far greater way, it was only these few who stood alone for God (Daniel

Spiritual Wellness 3 and 6). In order to ensure that we will be passionate for God later, we need to walk with Him now and begin to obey Him in the smallest tests! Peter learned this the hard way by following God "at a distance," rather than identifying himself more closely with Christ before his temptation to deny Him (Luke 22:54). God says that where a man's treasure is, there his heart will be also. As we invest our lives in God through serving Him and being on the receiving end of persecution for Him, our treasure will increasingly lie with Him, and so will our hearts (1 Timothy 3:12; Matthew 6:21). 4) Eliminate the competition. Jesus said it is impossible to have two masters (Matthew 6:24). We are tempted to love the world (those things which please our eyes, make us feel good about ourselves, and gratify our fleshly desires) (1 John 2:15-17). James says that to seek to embrace the world and its friendship is enmity (hatred) toward God and spiritual adultery (James 4:4). We need to get rid of those things in our lives (friends who would lead us the wrong way, things that take up our time and energy and keep us from serving God more fully, pursuit of popularity, pursuit of possessions, and the pursuit of physical and emotional gratifications). God promises that if we pursue Him, He will not only provide for our needs (Matthew 6:33) but will give us our desires as well (Psalm 37:4-5).

is not uncommon to have dips in a relationship. Peter dipped in his (Luke 22:54), and David dipped in his (2 Samuel 11), but they got up and pursued after God once again. John, in Revelation 2:4, states it is not a case of "losing" one's love but "leaving" one's love. The cure is to do the "first works," those things that caused one to grow in love with God in the first place. This would include those items mentioned above. The first step in this is confession and receiving the forgiveness and restored fellowship that are the result of that confession (1 John 1:9). There is no doubt that God will bless the pursuit of a passion for Him and will glorify His name through it. Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

5) If straying, begin to do what helped you grow in love with God in the first place. It Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 37

Spiritual Wellness

Sinful Impulses: Impulse control is never easy. All of us struggle with overcoming sinful impulses. James says, ―Each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed‖ (James 1:14). Part of the human condition is to feel impulses, and part of the Christian life is to control them. Impulse control has been a struggle for us since the fall. Eve saw that the fruit was ―desirable‖ (Genesis 3:6), and she chose to take it rather than control her impulse. Today, we still struggle. Often, impulses seem so strong as to overpower all scruples, commitments, and common sense. We feel that giving in is our only option. We have impulses to make frivolous purchases, to overeat, to have illicit sex, and to do many other things we know we shouldn‘t. It seems that Samson had quite a bit of trouble with impulse control. He is the perfect illustration of the proverb, ―Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control‖ (Proverbs 25:28). Samson saw a Philistine woman he wanted to marry, and he married her, despite his parents‘ objections (Judges 14:1-2); the marriage lasted a week. He found honey, and he ate it, even though, in the process, he had to break a vow and ceremonially defile himself (Judges 14:8-9). And, of course, he could never say ―no‖ to Delilah (Judges 16). Ironically, Samson is best known for his great physical strength. It goes to prove that the flesh is no ally in the battle against the flesh. It is a spiritual battle that must be won spiritually. Second Corinthians 5:17 says, ―Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!‖ As believers, we are new. We are no longer bound to our sinful natures

38 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

Spiritual Wellness

How to Control Them (Romans 6:17-18), but we are in the process of sanctification. The coming of the new usually takes time and discipline. Even mature believers struggle with impulse control (Romans 7:18-25), but the Bible provides ample hope that we can overcome. Praise the Lord, the Spirit produces selfcontrol in those yielded to Him (Galatians 5:23)! We have been given the spirit of self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7). First Peter 1:13 and 15 exhort us to ―prepare [our] minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. . . . But just as He who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do.‖ Our self-control is not simply an exercise of volition; we must rely on the grace of Jesus. Knowing that we have been called by God, we work to control our impulses from a foundation of love for God. We also work from a foundation of truth. When we know the truth, we can more easily dismiss impulses that seek to lead us into falsehood (John 8:32). Because we have the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16), when a sinful impulse comes into our minds, we can recognize that it is not of Him and summarily dismiss it. The impulse comes from the sin nature, to which we are no longer slaves (see Romans 6). We can act on 2 Corinthians 10:5 and take our thoughts captive. When we know the truth – that we have been declared holy (Romans 5:1-2), that we have the mind of Christ, and that we have the power of the Holy Spirit – we are better able to challenge our thoughts and choose our actions. The Bible calls us ―overcomers‖ by faith (1 John 5:4). We are not at the mercy of our impulses. Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 39

One of the strongest foundations on this earth is FAMILY Steps for a Strong Foundation in Jesus Read the Bible Together Pray Together Go to Church Together Communicate with Each Other Blessed Magazine

We can control them through the power of God in us (Ephesians 3:20). As we learn to say ―no‖ to our sinful impulses, we may experience pain and a sense of deprivation, yet we trust the promise of Hebrews 12:11 that we will eventually reap ―a harvest of righteousness and peace.‖ In the struggle to control impulses, many people derive benefit from accountability partners or counselors. Sometimes, impulse control is a made more difficult due to underlying anxiety or some type of brain abnormality. Overcoming an impulse involves both knowing God‘s truth and using the functional tools of behavior modification. Regardless of the exact methods we employ to control our impulses, we say with Paul, ―I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus‖ (Philippians 3:14). Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

Spiritual Wellness

Help for When You Don’t Feel Love for God Anymore

First, an important question: are you born again? Have you trusted the Lord Jesus Christ for your salvation? If so, the enmity between you and your Creator is gone, and you have entered a secure and loving relationship with God. If you have no faith in Christ, then you have no relationship with God (John 14:6)

Feelings come and go, and you may not always ―feel‖ love for God. Hearts tend to grow cold, and even the most on-fire Christians can struggle with maintaining their love and service to God. The church in Ephesus had to be reprimanded by Christ: ―You have forsaken the love you had at first‖ (Revelation 2:4). A lack of feelings of love, however, does not mean the relationship has ended. God does not change; His love is constant.

As cliché as it may sound, don‘t give up! Know that God loves you and desires for you to have an abundant and peaceful life within the parameters of His will. God is a loving, compassionate Father who looks upon you in great love. Second Corinthians 1:3 describes God as ―the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort.‖ He loves you and desires to help you through this trying time of feeling disconnected from Him. Our relationship with God is based on love. He loved us and sent His Son (John 3:16), and our response to His love is to love Him in return (1 John 4:19) and serve Him. Not service out of obligation, but out of true love for Him and who He is. God‘s will is not that we give of ourselves ―reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver‖ (2 Corinthians 9:7). So how do you become that ―cheerful giver‖ who gives your heart freely to God? Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 41

Spiritual Wellness Reflect Upon Your Walk Thus Far Should Christians feel warm and fuzzy toward God at all times? No. We all have valleys and deserts in our walk and feel all kinds of emotions at various points in our lives—just like we do in other relationships. In rekindling your affection for God, start at the very beginning. Reflect on where and how your walk with Him first began. When were you saved? Why were you saved? What did you feel when you first began to discover who God was? How has Jesus made Himself known to you in your daily life since? What things in life has God brought you through? Consider past victories (1 Samuel 7:12) and those times when you felt a deep desire and longing for God in your life. Pray Spend some quality time with God. Get to know Him more. To know Him is to love Him. Ask God to increase your desire for Him. Ask Him to fill you with His Spirit and rekindle your appreciation of His character. Continue submitting to the Holy Spirit and confess to God that you cannot overcome these struggles on your own— none of us can. When we ask for His helping hand, He always hears us! Psalm 18:6 says, ―In my distress I called to the LORD; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears.‖ Read Scripture

During the times when you feel nothing toward God, it helps to read His Word to remember how He feels about you. Dig into Scripture as much as possible while dealing with these feelings of disinterest. God‘s Word is truly ―a lamp to my feet and a light for my path‖ (Psalm 119:105). Try reading a psalm a day. The book of Psalms is very encouraging and has many prayers that you might really identify with, given your current situation. It is in the Word that God reveals Himself and His will for you. Seek Christian Counseling This is especially important if you are angry or upset with God for some reason. It is difficult to feel love for someone while you are angry at him. If there is an anger problem, how long have you felt this way? Can you attribute your feelings to a specific situation? Does anything help relieve your feelings or temporarily change your perception? Biblical counseling can help you work through specific issues. Through the healing process, guided by a pastor or other counselor, you should be able to let go of the anger and hurt, and your perception of God should change for the better. Find A Godly Mentor Surely, there is someone you know who loves the Lord and whose Christian joy is evident. Ask this person to meet with you regularly. Spend time together, study the Bible together, pray together. Ask

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 43

Spiritual Wellness questions about your mentor‘s spiritual walk and how you can love the Lord more. This friend can encourage you on your journey. Plug Into Your Local Church God intends for the Christian life to be lived corporately. That‘s why He calls the church the ―body‖ of Christ (Romans 12:5). There are many opportunities to serve the Lord through your church and many people who can exhort, support, and encourage you. God will continue to love you dearly! ―I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord‘s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God‖ (Ephesians 3:17–19). Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

44 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

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Spiritual Wellness

God! What Do You Want from Me? The people in the prophet Micah‘s day complained that God was never satisfied. They snidely asked, ―Will the Lord be pleased with thousands of rams, with ten thousand rivers of olive oil?‖ (Micah 6:7). It was their way of asking, ―What does God want from us, anyway?‖ Some people today feel like all their striving to please God goes for nothing, and they, too, ask, ―What does God want from me?‖ Jesus was asked once which commandment of the Law was the greatest. He answered, ―Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‗Love your neighbor as yourself.‘ There is no commandment greater than these‖ (Mark 12:30– 32; cf. Matthew 22:37–39). What God wants is really quite simple: He wants us. All our service for God must flow from those two commands to love, or it is not real service; it is fleshly effort. And Romans 8:8 says that those who are ―in the flesh cannot please God.‖ Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 47

Spiritual Wellness First, God wants us to trust in His Son as Savior and Lord (Philippians 2:9–11). Second Peter 3:9 says, ―The Lord . . . is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.‖ We come to know Jesus through repenting of our sin and accepting Him as our personal sacrifice (Romans 10:9; John 1:12). When Jesus‘ disciples asked Him to show them the Father, He replied, ―Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father‖ (John 14:9). God wants us to know Him, and we can only know Him through Jesus. Next, God wants us to ―become conformed to the image of His Son‖ (Romans 8:29). The Father wants all of His children to be like Jesus. He brings situations into our lives to refine us and chip away those flawed characteristics that are in the way of our becoming who He designed us to be (Hebrews 12:7; James 1:12). As Jesus was obedient to the Father in everything, so the goal of every child of God should be to obey our Heavenly Father (John 8:29). First Peter 1:14–15 says, ―As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do.‖ Many people, like the Pharisees in Jesus‘ day, try to put the external action before the inner heart change (Luke 11:42). They place all the focus on what they do rather than who they are. But, unless love for God is our motivation, outward displays of

goodness only result in pride and legalism. Neither pleases God. When we surrender ourselves totally to Him, His Holy Spirit empowers us to love God fully and serve Him from the right motive. True service and holiness are simply the outworking of the Spirit, the overflowing of a life dedicated to the glory of God. When our focus is on loving God rather than simply serving Him, we end up doing both. If we skip the relationship, our service is of no use and benefits nothing (1 Corinthians 13:1–2). The prophet Micah responded to the Israelites‘ complaint that they didn‘t know what God wanted from them. The prophet says, ―He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?‖ (Micah 6:8, ESV). God‘s desire for us is very simple. People complicate things, tacking on rules and man-made laws that ensure frustration and kill the joy in following Christ (2 Corinthians 3:6). God wants us to love Him with all our hearts and let our obedience stem from a heartfelt desire to be pleasing in His sight. David understood what God wanted when he prayed, ―You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise‖ (Psalm 51:16–17). Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

48 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

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Relationships

Spousal Abuse! Is this an Acceptable Reason for Divorce? By Anna Diehl

The Bible is silent on the issue of spousal abuse as a reason for divorce, although it is obvious what God expects a marriage to look like (Ephesians 5:22â&#x20AC;&#x201C;33), and abuse is contrary to everything godly. Physical violence against a spouse is immoral and should not be tolerated by anyone. No one should remain in an unsafe environment, whether it involves a family member, friend, employer, caregiver, or stranger. Physical abuse is also against the law, and civil authorities should be the first ones contacted if abuse occurs. Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 51

Relationships A spouse who is being abused should immediately seek a safe place. If there are children involved, they should also be protected and removed from the situation. There is nothing unbiblical about separating from an abuser; in fact, it is morally right to protect oneself and one‘s children. The Bible never commands divorce, even in the case of abuse. The Bible specifies two acceptable reasons for divorce: abandonment of a Christian by an unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15) and adultery (Matthew 5:32). Since the Bible does not list abuse as an acceptable reason for divorce, we are careful to limit our advice to separation. God allows divorce in the event of abandonment and adultery, but even those circumstances do not automatically trigger divorce proceedings; divorce is still a last resort. In the case of infidelity, it is better for two Christians to reconcile than divorce. It is better to extend the forgiveness and love that God freely gives us (Colossians 3:13). Reconciliation with an abuser, however, is far different. Reconciling with an abusive partner depends completely on the abuser proving his or her reliability, which could take years—if it happens at all. Separation from an abusive spouse is likely to be long-term. Once separation has been established, the abuser has the responsibility to seek help. First and foremost, he should seek God.

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―For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And the door is opened to everyone who knocks‖ (Matthew 7:8). God has power to heal individuals and relationships. He must be the Lord of our lives, the Master of our assets, and the Head of our households. Psychological aid and legal limitations (restraining orders) on an abuser are also appropriate, and such tools are important to his or her process of change. If the abuser demonstrates verifiable change, independently confirmed, the relationship may be resumed with much caution. Both husband and wife must commit themselves to God‘s path and develop their relationship with God through Christ. ―Keep me from deceitful ways; be gracious to me and teach me your law. I have chosen the way of faithfulness; I have set my heart on your laws‖ (Psalm 119:29–30). This commitment to God should be accompanied by intensive counseling from a trusted pastor or believing licensed counselor. The counselling should be taken first individually, then as a couple, and finally as an entire family, as all need help healing. Change is possible for an abusive person who truly repents and humbly surrenders to the Lord (2 Corinthians 3:18). There are a number of ―red flags‖ to look for before entering a permanent relationship. Unfortunately, these indicators may not be visible until after the

Relationships wedding takes place, since many abusers are skilled at hiding their true natures. However, a short list of things to look out for includes irrational jealousy, the need to be in control, a quick temper, cruelty toward animals, attempts to isolate the other person from his or her friends and family, drug or alcohol abuse, and disrespect for boundaries, privacy, personal space, or moral values. If you see any of these warning signs in a person you are entering a relationship with, please seek advice from someone familiar with abusive situations. If you are in an abusive situation right now, whether the abuser is a spouse, parent, child, caretaker, teacher, relative, or anyone else, please know that God does not want you to remain in that situation. It is not Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;s will for you to accept physical, sexual, or psychological abuse. Leave the situation, find someone to help you stay safe, and involve law enforcement immediately. Through it all, pray for Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;s guidance and protection.

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Question: Do You Know

Jesus? Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 53

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Relationships The Bible says that "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral" (Hebrews 13:4). Scripture never says what a husband and wife are or are not allowed to do sexually. Husbands and wives are instructed, "Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time (1 Corinthians 7:5a). This verse perhaps lays down the principle for sexual relations in marriage. Whatever is done, it should be mutually agreed upon. No one should be encouraged or coerced to do something he or she is uncomfortable with or thinks is wrong. If a husband and wife both agree that they want to try something (e.g., oral sex, different positions, sex toys, etc.), then the Bible does not give any reason why they cannot. There are a few things, though, that are never allowable sexually for a married couple. The practice of "swapping,â&#x20AC;&#x2022;- or "swinging/swingers," or "bringing in an extra" (threesomes, foursomes, etc.) is blatant adultery (Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:3). Adultery is sin even if your spouse allows, approves, or even participates in it. Pornography appeals to the "lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes" (1 John 2:16) and is therefore condemned by God as well. A husband and wife should never bring pornography into their sexual union. Other than these two items, there is nothing that Scripture explicitly forbids a husband and wife to do with each other as long as it is by mutual consent. Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

What are the Guidelines for Christian Couples on Sex?

56 Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017

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Personal Wellness

Should a Christian Pursue Modeling? As Christians, our goal is to please the Lord. So, with that goal in mind, we should prepare ourselves for careers that are rewarding to ourselves, beneficial to others, and, most especially, pleasing to God. It could be possible that the Lord would allow a Christian to pursue a career in modeling, but, generally, He has a higher calling for His people. Romans 12:1-2 says, ―Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.‖ The question for the Christian to decide is whether modeling is consistent with our command to offer our bodies to God and whether such a career is ―holy and pleasing‖ to Him.

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 59

Personal Wellness The whole purpose of the book of Romans is for Christians to know the truth of how we should live, the truth about what God expects of us, the truth about God and His judgments of our way of life. The first eleven chapters are about righteousness—the unrighteousness of fallen sinners, our need for God‘s righteousness, and His provision of that righteousness through Christ. When we get to chapter 12, the first word is ―therefore.‖ Having built the case that we have been redeemed by God out of our hopeless, sinful state, it is obvious that our calling is to be different from the world and no longer to buy into the lies of image-obsessed cultures. There are some sad realities in the world of modeling. Many aspiring models work at minimum-wage jobs waiting for their big break, which, for most, never comes. The lifestyles of fashion models is also a reason for concern. There is a considerable amount of drugs and immoral behavior in the fashion industry. Young women are often used and abused by those in power. The highly competitive nature of the industry leads to greed, dishonesty, and cutthroat tactics. Those whose living is dependent upon the success of a designer, fashion house, or product line are at the mercy of these tactics. While it may be possible for a Christian to be in this world and not be affected by it, 1 Corinthians 15:33 warns us, ―Do not be misled: ‗Bad company corrupts good character.‘"

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God is very concerned about how we use or abuse our bodies. ―Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body‖ (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Christians are not to try to look like the world; rather, we are to be a special, purified people (Titus 2:14), people who are set apart as belonging to the Lord. Christians should be well dressed and appropriately fashioned, not to bring the focus on ourselves, but so that we can go about the work God has for us without being overly concerned about our appearance. Women, especially, are exhorted to dress modestly (1 Timothy 2:9), and, since only the most successful models are given the choice of which clothes to model (unless the model wants to remain unemployed), it is hard to see how the modeling industry is compatible with a Christian worldview and dressing modestly. Romans reminds us that Christians are to be set apart from the world, especially aspects of the world which are ungodly. Once we have accepted Christ and pledged our lives to Him, then we are ready to do some real modeling, because there is no greater calling in this world than to model Christ. Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org \

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Personal Wellness

Christians and Nightclubs Is Clubbing a Sin? To put it bluntly, nightclubs are part of the world which is controlled by Satan. They are designed for the purpose of giving oneself over to sinful desires. Nightclubs exist primarily for two purposes: drinking alcohol and meeting members of the opposite sex, most often with sexual activity in mind. Yes, there are music and dancing, but primarily singles in particular go clubbing to drink and meet someone. Nightclubs are of the world, and, while Christians are to be in the world, we are not to be of it. Being of the world means to be interested in and desiring those things that appeal to the sinful nature.

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 63

Personal Wellness Paul, speaking to Christians, addresses the issue of worldly practices in Ephesians 4:17-24, "So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more. You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Here Paul describes those who exclude God and give themselves over to sensuality for the practice of every kind of impurity with greediness. Obviously, God does not desire us to give ourselves over to sin so easily and willfully. Notice what God says here, "put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires." It's interesting to note that God says when we give ourselves over to our sin nature, we are being deceived by our desires. Satan is a master counterfeiter. In other

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words, Satan presents something that appears on the surface to be attractive. The lure of clubbing is that it is very enjoyable, fun, and exciting. What we don't see are the consequences because Satan keeps the sensual attraction at the forefront of our minds. Sex, alcohol, and drugs—all found in most nightclubs— are very destructive, both physically and spiritually. God has a place for sex where it is the most enjoyable—in monogamous marriage, where there are no STD's, HIV, guilt, aloneness—and those who don't believe God in this are short-changing themselves. God desires for us to be righteous and holy because He created us to be that way. The benefits of living the life that God intended far exceed the petty, shortlived thrills that this world offers. Many who are or used to be in the nightclub lifestyle say the same thing—there is no joy, there is no fulfillment; there is only emptiness. Only God can fulfill our needs and give us the joy and happiness we all seek. Clubbing offers nothing more than a very cheap imitation. There is no lasting joy to be found in nightclubs, only temptation to sin. Such places are most especially not for Christians. Aside from the obvious temptations, there is the issue of our Christian witness in the world. When unbelievers see a professing Christian engaging in a sinful lifestyle, Christ is maligned and demeaned. We are to let

our lights shine before men so they see our good works and glorify our Father who is in heaven (Matthew 5:16). Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;s hard to see how the light of our new life in Christ can shine in a nightclub. Even if the Christian is not indulging in the sinful activities, the witness he or she presents to the watching world by just being there is destructive and must be avoided Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

Blessed Magazine June/July, 2017 45

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Feature Story

Artificial Insemination Are We Trying to Play God?

Artificial insemination, also known as intrauterine insemination (IUI), is a medical procedure in which a man's sperm is implanted in a woman's uterus at precisely the right time and in precisely the right location in order to increase the chances of pregnancy. While it is usually used in conjunction with fertility medicine in women, this is not always the case Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 71

Feature Story Artificial insemination is different from in-vitro fertilization in that fertilization occurs inside the woman and in a more natural way, while in-vitro fertilization occurs outside the womb, and then the fertilized egg(s) are implanted in the woman's uterus. Artificial insemination does not result in unused or discarded embryos. Artificial insemination does not have as high a success rate as invitro fertilization, but many Christians view it as a much more acceptable alternative.

Should a Christian married couple consider artificial insemination? The Bible always presents pregnancy and having children positively (Psalm 127:35). The Bible nowhere discourages anyone from seeking to have children. The fact that artificial insemination does not have the moral dilemmas of in-vitro fertilization would seem to make it a valid alternative. So, if artificial insemination increases the chances of an otherwise infertile couple having children, it would seem to be something a Christian married couple can prayerfully consider. Some object to all fertility options due to the fact that such procedures supposedly do not take into account God's sovereignty. But God is just as capable of preventing pregnancy after artificial insemination (and in-vitro fertilization, for that matter) as He is of preventing

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pregnancy after normal sexual intercourse. Artificial insemination does not "overrule" God's sovereignty. Nothing overrules God's sovereignty. As proven by the account of Abraham and Sarah, God is capable of enabling a reproductively dead woman to get pregnant and have a healthy baby. God is absolutely sovereign over the reproductive process. If it is God's sovereign will for a woman to get pregnant, she will get pregnant. If it is not God's sovereign will, she will not get pregnant, no matter what methods the couple attempts. Yes, a Christian married couple can prayerfully consider artificial insemination. As in all things, a couple considering artificial insemination should ask God for wisdom (James 1:5) and very clear leading from the Holy Spirit.

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Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

“Start spreadin‟ the news!” Not only is that the opening line to the classic Frank Sinatra song, “New York, New York,” it is the foundation of the promotions business. A business in which Carlton McConnell has thrived for more than three decades. While still a student at Eastern Michigan University, McConnell began promoting on-campus concerts for such musical acts as “Prince.” The CEO of Dallas based “Round the Clock Entertainment” has amassed an impressive portfolio of work, promoting major concerts, plays, and fundraisers; designing media marketing campaigns for icons like Muhammad Ali and Magic Johnson; to promoting several award-winning recording artists, along with many unknown -- yet talented -- singers, actors, comedians, and musicians. His marketing and promotions prowess has been recognized with dozens of awards and proclamations…including a 2014 Stellar Award for work on the “Inside Gospel with Frankie Wilson” program. “As with most professions, the promotions business is undergoing rapid changes during the current digital age,” says the 53year old McConnell. “Where once the main „tools of the trade‟ were a landline phone, a printing press, and plenty of „shoe leather,‟ we now operate across multiple media platforms with a smartphone, laptop and dozens of specialized software programs as essential „work tools.‟ We have extensive capabilities to produce video and audio content for television and radio, along with content for print media. In mid to late June, the IMPACT television network will be airing a Gospel Concert executive produced by Round the Clock, the „2017 INDUSTRY CELEBRATION AND SHOWCASE.‟ So, we encourage you to check your local listings for the times and channel in your area.” “The current research shows 47% of American consumers say Facebook has a great impact on their purchasing behavior – that‟s double the figure from back in 2011. YouTube mobile reaches more folks in the 18-49 age group than any American cable network. And worldwide, there are nearly 375-million regular Twitter users,” marvels McConnell.

For the past 15-years, Round the Clock Entertainment has had a primary focus on the Gospel Music industry. And McConnell says he and his team have been working hard to get artists „up to speed‟ on effective social media networking strategies. The result has been record high sales of music and concert tickets. In recognition of his work, the Lansing, Michigan native has been nominated in the categories of „Promoter of the Year‟ and „Event Planner of the Year‟ by “The Prayze Factor People‟s Choice Awards.” Of which McConnell says, “I‟m humbled and honored to be considered among the very best in the field of Gospel music promotions and marketing.” Last year, more than 70-million internet votes were cast for Prayze Factor People‟s Choice nominees.

For a list of the current nominees, and to cast your vote, go online to www.prayzefactorawards.com. If you‟d like more information on the promotional, marketing or media services provided by Round the Clock Entertainment, you can reach the company by phone at: (972) 834-5936 or via email at: roundtheclock.cm@gmail.com.

Blessed Magazine August/September, 2017 73

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