LOVE LIVES IN US...The Winstons. E.L & Ron

Love lives in us…the Winstons and we want to share a little of it with you. When you think about a loving relationship, you can think of it as a well written ballad. The chords must work well together and each singer must know their part for the harmony. While we appreciate all of the equality talk in many modern relationships, what does that look like? It actually looks like everyone playing their roles! After you read the Winstons’ sheet music, see if you agree.

The Mrs.

I am a caretaker and a nurturer, so I needed a relationship that allowed me to be these things. In our home, I do the cooking and cleaning (yes, I have a full time job). I love my career and I love my role at home. I go to bed each night feeling harmonious because I have filled my part Winston and I had looooong discussions about the importance of roles to each of us, so when we got married we each knew what we wanted Now, dividing roles as specifically as we have may not work for everyone, but it works for us. We don’t have disagreements about who is responsible for what. No one feels the other is taking their authority or power away. If we do come across some discomfort in a situation, it really just takes us a moment to figure out whose role it mostly closely is associated with. We also regularly check in about the lyrics of our love song Are there any things that need to change? Or are we unable to maintain something that we previously did? Then, we talk through what changes sound like and how we feel about them Keeping in unison means that we continuously fine tune our instruments. This helps us to make beautiful music!

I am a caretaker and a nurturer, so I needed a relationship that allowed me to be these things. In our home, I do the cooking and cleaning (yes, I have a full time job). I love my career and I love my role at home. I go to bed each night feeling harmonious because I have filled my part.

Winston and I had looooong discussions about the importance of roles to each of us, so when we got married we each knew what we wanted. Now, dividing roles as specifically as we have may not work for everyone, but it works for us. We don’t have disagreements about who is responsible for what. No one feels the other is taking their authority or power away. If we do come across some discomfort in a situation, it really just takes us a moment to figure out whose role it mostly closely is associated with. We also regularly check in about the lyrics of our love song. Are there any things that need to change? Or are we unable to maintain something that we previously did? Then, we talk through what changes sound like and how we feel about them. Keeping in unison means that we continuously fine tune our instruments. This helps us to make beautiful music!

Winston

Like the Mrs. said, we had a lot of discussions about roles, how we felt about them, and how we saw ourselves in this song called life we were creating. In my wedding vows to my wife, I promised her that our hearts would always beat in sync and I take that vow very seriously. I can’t stress enough that communication is key and as we grow as individuals that we pour into our relationship so that we also grow as a couple. It keeps us on the same beat. Another way, we keep our love song playing in sync is that we are not concerned with how someone else’s love song is playing. We don’t listen to people who have so many opinions on how we should be singing our song. This love song has stretched me, comforted me, made me grow up, and show up. I’m always excited to hear the next verse. My prayer today and everyday since we met is that I never fail to protect, provide, and comfort her and that our hearts always beat in sync.

Thoughts to Leave You

When you and your partner discuss your love song, it is not that you have to be as traditional as the Winstons, but more about how you all compose for yourself. Be sure it is a song that suits both parties’ strengths, but that you understand your weaknesses as well. Don’t assume your partner knows all the lyrics. Give each other the grace to miss a note sometimes.

Remember that you are building unity not creating chaos. It is always about finding how love lives in your relationship.