Being A Broad April 2010 #55
The monthly magazine for international women living in Japan
our cover girl: BOUDOIR DAY SPA’S TRACEY KHOO
BROADS and RACQUETS tennis event an interview with AUTHOR KIT PANCOAST NAGAMURA an INSIDER’S guide to OKINAWA
TOKYO MUMS share their STORIES training for TRAILWALKER
LOVE found do you want to on EXCHANGE RUN your own INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL?
www.being-a-broad.com
PRINTING: BEAUTY:
RELOCATION:
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IN THIS
ISSUE 4
I feel like there’s a lot of my favourite people in Tokyo featured in this issue! Starting with our cover girl, Tracey Khoo from Boudoir, who ensures that I actually take some time out to relax by giving me the most amazing facials each month. And another Tracey (Taylor) continues the story of her Tokyo marathon on page 11. I found myself reading and rereading Tracey’s story in last month’s issue and, being a bit of a softy, was often in tears. So I couldn’t wait to see what happened…I won’t spoil it for you, though! And then there’s Kit Pancoast Nagamura and her book we feature on pages 16 and 17. Kit has long been an inspiration to me so I was thrilled when her book came out last year. I actually took it along to dinner with some Japanese friends who don’t speak a word of English so that my British husband could use it throughout the meal and it caused much hilarity! I can highly recommend it. Finally, don’t forget our special (and totally free!) BAB tennis event on April 24…find out more on page five. Enjoy!
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image: Kerry Raftis/www.keyshots.com
image: David Stetson
message from the founder being a broad news BAB news, broads and racquets event
our cover girl Boudoir’s Tracey Khoo
women of the world news from around the globe
things we love the little things we love in Japan
6 our cover girl image: iStockphoto.com/ Vasiliki Varvaki
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Tokyo girl
Japan’s unsettling suicide problem
• salsa dancing in Tokyo • the Tokyo Marathon: a perfect storm of idiocy
Aiko introduces us to Okinawa
11 real-life story 12 boonies guide
Caroline Pover BAB Founder
14 11 real-life story
working • we profile TIP’s Gemma Nokes • want to start your own international school?
Publishers Caroline Pover & Emily Downey Editor & Designer Danielle Tate-Stratton Marketing Consultant Amy Dose Advertisement Designer Chris May BAB reps Kelsey Aguirre (Shonan) kelsey@being-a-broad.com Shaney Crawford (Tsukuba) shaney@being-a-broad.com Aiko Miyagi (Okinawa) aiko@being-a-broad.com Contributors Gabbi Bradshaw, Karen Regn, Natasha Willams, Tracey Taylor, Gemma Nokes, Helen Kaiho, Dee Green, Rachel Hashimoto Cover Model Tracey Khoo Cover Photographer Kerry Raftis, www.keyshots.com Proofreader Jane Farries Printing Mojo Print Opinions expressed by BAB contributors are not necessarily those of the Publishers.
image provided by Rachel Hashimoto
the broads (and boys!) 16 learning
The Ultimate Japanese Phrasebook
Tokyo Mothers Group mums share their experiences in Japan
18 mothers 20 feature
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preparing for Oxfam’s Trailwalker
she found love in Japan love found on exchange
21 she found love
Being A Broad magazine, editor@being-a-broad.com www.being-a-broad.com tel. 03-5879-6825, fax: 03-6368-6191 Being A Broad April 2010
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BAB NEWS
From the BAB Message Boards: Member girljin asks: Hi there, not sure where to put this since it overlaps a whole load of different topics. Here’s the lowdown: My boyfriend is in the Japanese Self Defense Force (JSDF). He recently asked his superior (or one of many I should say) about marrying a foreigner and was told that he could technically do it, but if she did not have Japanese nationality (kokuseki) he wouldn’t be eligible for any of the standard benefits, such as a housing stipend and increases in pay to cover spousal and child support. I think this has to be wrong because I know others foreigners who have married JSDF members without problems, and even if
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Thanks for picking up this issue of Being A Broad. Like what you see? Then why not subscribe today? For just ¥4,500 you’ll get one year (12 issues) of Being A Broad delivered to your door. Email editor@being-a-broad. com to subscribe today! We now have the past several issues of BAB on our website and will be adding more soon. Check them out at www.being-abroad.com, and let us know what you think!
I wanted to take Japanese nationality (I imagine this is along the lines of citizenship)—and I don’t—it’s not like this is just a matter of signing a form. Japan doesn’t want to grant me citizenship any more than I want to give up my American citizenship. Since this is an issue within JSDF, I’m not sure if traditional lawyers would have answers for this. It’s hard to tell if this is a misunderstanding (in which case, it’s also tough to tell who it is that is making the mistake) or something that we would actually have to deal with should we marry. Anyone heard of something like this? Any ideas on where to go for reliable info? In response to a post asking for clarification, member girljin expands: He said he asked the officer in charge of those benefits. The specifics of base are kind of secretive—much more so than for the US military it seems—so it’s hard to figure out how things work. I would completely write it off, except that there are certain areas where Japan is woefully behind and intermarriage is still iffy for some people. If the JSDF were not involved, I would look to a lawyer who is familiar with international marriage and Japanese businesses. But since it’s the military, I’m not really sure who to go to. I thought maybe he meant to say visa or some other legal permission to be in Japan because in English he was calling it “license.” But then he told me that in Japanese it was kokuseki. Member Blue Lotus suggests: Girljin, I’ve heard similar stories and it seems like many higher-ups in the JSDF are either badly misinformed or purposely make stuff like this up to discourage their underlings from marrying non-Japanese. Are you close enough to those foreigners who married JSDF members to press them for details and advice? If not, please consider joining Married In Japan (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ MarriedinJapan). Aside from the general advice and support our members can offer, we do have a few JSDF spouses who may be able to offer more specific help. To read the rest of the replies or to offer your own suggestions, visit us online at www.being-a-broad. com/index.php/forums.
“My encyclopedia, my translator, my phone book, my best friend!”
—Western woman living in Japan
514–page book including everything you need to make the most out of your life: case studies of Western women working in almost 50 different types of jobs; anecdotes from many of the 200 Western women interviewed; profiles of 23 women’s organisations; and essential Japanese words and phrases. An essential book for any Western woman living in Japan. Read about: • Coping with culture shock. • Finding clothes and shoes that fit. • Avoiding hair disasters. • Cooking Japanese food. • Telling a chikan where to go. • Dating and the singles scene. • Organising contraception. • Getting married and divorced. • Adopting a baby. • Educating your child. • Finding a job. • Teaching gender studies in the Englishlanguage classroom. • Coping with reverse culture shock when you leave Japan.
Alexandra Press, 2001, ¥3,000 (inc. tax) To order email info@being-a-broad.com
You can pick BAB up at the following locations: Shibuya-ku: • British School Tokyo • Boudoir • Sin Den
• Krissman Tennis • PAL International School • ROTI Rop-
• Nua Japan
pongi • Paddy Foley’s • Asian Tigers • ai International School
Minato-ku: • Suji’s • Nakashima Dentist • TELL •
Meguro-ku: Montessori Friends Kichijoji: Shinzen Yoga Koto-ku: Toho Women’s Clinic Bunkyo-ku: Joy to the World International School Suginami-ku: JUN International School Chofu-shi: American School in Japan
Nishimachi International School • Gymboree • Global Kids Academy • Mitsubishi UFJ Azabujuban • Tokyo Surgical and Medical Clinic • National Azabu • Segafredo • Tokyo American Club • Nissin World Delicatessen • Crown Relocations • Temple University • Hulabootie
Yokohama: Treehouse Montessori • St. Maur Saitama: Columbia International School Nagoya: St. George Academy Tsukuba: Through BAB Rep Shaney Shonan: Through BAB Rep Kelsey Okinawa: Through BAB Rep Aiko (To contact your local BAB Rep for a copy, simply send an email. All contact details are on page three.)
BROADS AND RACQUETS
SATURDAY APRIL 24 by Natasha Williams
Imagee provided by KITS.
A recent women’s tournament hosted by KITS.
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oming from the west coast of Canada, I grew up with parks full of free, year-round tennis courts. When I got to Japan, I was a bit disappointed—though not altogether surprised— to find that it’s a little bit more complicated to play tennis here than it is back home. Classes in Japanese were (and still are) way beyond my level, my university’s club system was confusing and seemed frustrating (I would often see players trying to practice on our soccer field, so full was the tennis court), and everywhere I looked, sessions were prohibitively expensive. These are all concerns that Allen Krissman aimed to combat when he started Krissman International Tennis School (KITS) in 1984. Originally hired to teach Japanese coaches about the American style of tennis, which he describes as “a more aggressive and attacking, net-rushing style of tennis that was not well known or popular here in Japan. At that time, it was stay back, hit safety shots, and wait for the other player to miss...” After two years of teaching this American approach in Japan, Krissman opened his own tennis school, where all classes would be taught by native English speakers, all of whom would be certified by the United States Professional Tennis Association (USPTA). Another concern that Krissman took into account was cost, as he made a commitment
to offer lessons to expats at a reasonable cost at all times. Players of all levels are more than welcome at KITS and, in fact, of the total beginner Allen says: “Beginners, especially the ones who feel that they have no athletic talent—they excite us! Those are my favourite type of students, the ones who get the biggest kick out of hitting that first ball or serving that first serve! It is such a privilege introducing the ‘game of a lifetime’ to these brand new players.” Of his adult students, Allen estimates that 85 percent are women and enthuses that “tennis in Tokyo is the perfect sport for women, mixing business with pleasure and a great workout. Unlike golf, a good tennis game can be played in an hour or an hour and a half, and it makes a great break in the mornings once the kids are taken to school or in the evenings after work...Remember that tennis is one of the few sports that places women and men in the same learning cycle and some of our classes are mixed, with women playing alongside men.” No matter your interest or level, from a casual player looking for a social outlet to competitive athlete, KITS has a class for you. To get a taste of the sport—and the school—why not try the Broads and Racquets event listed to the right? For more information about KITS, visit BAB http://tennisintokyo.com.
Advice for Renegades, A Tip From Anna: What’s Been Budding in the Dark?
impressive or useful; fun.) Pick just one thing that makes you drum your fingers and smile. Then bring a tiny bit of it into your life. Notice: I did not say quit your job and join the circus. Just take experimental tastes (one swing on a trapeze, if you will) and see what you like. Then—this part is hard—when you find something fun, play at it. Follow the tickle of delight. It will take you to full bloom.
Ah, spring. They say that the bravest thing in the world is a flower, because it lives “balls out.” (Literally.) This month, take note: What is sending up new tendrils in your life? What secret longings are nudging you? What ridiculous dreams are ready to see the light? Now quick, without thinking about it, write down ten imaginary careers that sound fun. Then list ten hobbies that sound fun. (Not
Sound interesting? Why not try it out with Krissman Tennis and BAB this month? The Broads and Racquets event features two sessions. Beginners and Advanced Beginners: This session will be an introduction to tennis. You’ll learn the proper stretching techniques, about the equipment, the proper grips on the racket, and hitting the ball successfully. You’ll learn the rules of the game and partake in some fun, friendly matches. All wannabe players, the plumb curious, and any can’t-walk-and-chew-gum-at-the-sametime people…this session is for you. Intermediates and Advanced: This will be a stroke evaluation and drill class. You’re no novice to the game! We will look at your strokes, volleys, smashes, and serves. We’ll explore the classic style versus the “modern game” and end up with some lively doubles play! Both sessions will be presented by certified United States Professional Tennis Association (USPTA) tennis professionals under the direction of Allen Krissman of Krissman International Tennis Schools. Allen has over 25 years of teaching professional tennis lessons in Japan. This event will be followed up with a five-week course in each level (beginner/advanced beginner and intermediate/advanced), with an exclusive discount offer for those who attend the event. The five-week course will be held at the same times, every other week on Saturday mornings. When: Saturday April 24, 2010; beginners and advanced beginners: 9am–10:20am. Intermediates and advanced:10:30am–noon. Where: Omni court at the Shin-Okubo Teaching Court (a five-minute walk from the Shin-Okubo Station on the Yamanote line). Who: Both sessions are open to all BAB members and their female friends. Each participant will receive a free gift compliments of Krissman International Tennis School. Cost: Free! All equipment will be provided. Please wear appropriate shoes and clothing. To sign-up for this event, please reserve your space at tennisintokyo@gmail.com.
Anna Kunnecke is a life coach living in Tokyo. www.annakunnecke.com
Being A Broad April 2010
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KHOO
of Boudoir Day Spa, cover photography by Kerry Raftis
all images: Kerry Raftis/www.keyshots.com
our cover girl
TRACEY
A Day in the Life: 8am: Wake up and start the day. Usually with a hearty breakfast and a good cup of coffee! 9am: Start the commute to work. 10am to 9pm: This time is all about pampering. I am a skin care technician so I spend most of the day treating people’s skin. I love it! 9pm: Head home for dinner, check my emails, and then it’s off to bed!
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Full name: Khoo Sit Ming (Tracey) Age: 30 Nationality: Malaysian Grew up in: Malaysia Time in Japan: four and a half years Japanese ability: fluent Works at: Boudoir Day Spa (www.boudoirtokyo.com) Why did you come to Japan? While working in Singapore I met my ex-husband. We fell in love and married and I moved to Tokyo to be with him. Why do you stay in Japan? The main reason I stayed was because I married a Japanese man. After moving to Japan I started studying Japanese for one year in Kijijoji. I was eventually hired by Marilyn Klein, the owner of Boudoir Day Spa. That was a challenge for me as I only spoke Malaysian and Japanese and Boudoir is a full service English day spa. Marilyn gave me English lessons with a really lovely lady called MaryGrace and today my English is brilliant! I’ve now been working at Boudoir for just over three years.
How do you manage to balance everything in your life? I do get two days off a week, so I try to run all my errands in that time. Boudoir is very busy, so five days a week I am keeping Tokyo beautiful! I love my job. I’m so happy to be part of the Boudoir team. I work with five other wonderful women and work is always so much fun. All the Boudoir gals have great chemistry and I’ve made really good friends at work, whom I will always treasure. I’m also glad to be able to work in the most famous international beauty spa in Tokyo. I love all my clients, I enjoy working on their skin and seeing the improvement. Healing someone’s skin and giving her more confidence is just an amazing feeling. Working with a varied international client base is really exciting. I never thought I would have the opportunity to meet so many fabulous people from all over the world. I enjoy learning about all the different cultures. I love being in Tokyo because there is always something fun and exciting happening here. It’s a very stimulating place.
What do you do to relax? I like to take care of myself on my days off as I spend ten hours a day looking after other people. I try to do yoga and love exploring all the different onsen in Japan. Getting out of Tokyo is also really important, as the city is so busy that a bit of downtime always makes me feel good. I also love to see the Japanese countryside and nature, it’s really beautiful. I also indulge in body massages and acupuncture. It’s important to treat your body right. I think too many people work, work, and work in this country and forget that your body is your temple and that sometimes a little bit of pampering goes a long way. Best thing about being a foreign woman in Japan? The best thing about living in Japan, whether I am a woman or not, is that every day is an adventure! I’ve been very fortunate to work in the industry I love. I love the glitz and glamour that Tokyo has to offer and the food is incredible! Also the fashion is something else, I love shopping and designer BAB labels. Tokyo is fantastic for shopping!
WOMEN OF THE WORLD
compiled by Danielle Tate-Stratton
image: buckbell
Constance McMillen, an 18-year-old student at Itawamba County Agricultural High School in Mississippi asked her school to lift its ban on same-sex couples at prom, requesting that she be allowed to bring her girlfriend to the event and wear a tux. In response, her school not only denied her request but cancelled prom altogether. The American Civil Liberties Union became involved and helped Constance take the issue to court, where a US District Court Judge ruled that Constance’s first amendment rights had been violated by the school district, but did not require the school to reinstate prom. Parents in the area organised an alternate prom, open to all students, though fewer than ten students are reported to have attended that event. Constance was also invited to appear on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, where she received $30,000 from the talk show star and Tonic. com to continue her education.
Twenty-two British-Asian women are currently in the running to become MPs in England and Scotland, and should one of them win, she would be the first such woman to hold the position in Britain, where the first male BritishAsian MP was elected in 1892.
image: iStockphoto.com/Phil Date
Women are a large and important part of the growing Asian wine trade. For example, Jeannie Cho Lee from Hong Kong is the first Asian to win the challenging Master of Wine distinction, and many women in the region are going into the wine business as buyers and critics. China has also begun growing its own wines, with Judy Leissner considered to be one of the pioneers in Chinese wine production.
image: d-s-n
A study out of the London School of Economics has shown that the level of education a woman has correlates strongly with the amount of alcohol she consumes. Researchers looked at thousands of 39-year-old women born in the same week in the ‘70s and found that women with a university degree were twice as likely to drink daily as those without that level of education, as well as being more likely to admit to having a drinking problem.
A New York District Court judge recently invalidated two patents held on the human BRCA1 and BRCA2 genes, which are related to breast and ovarian cancer. The patent holders had been Myriad Genetics and the University of Utah Research Foundation, who held the exclusive rights to perform diagnostic tests at a cost of some $3,000 each. The judge ruled that although skill was required in isolating the genes, this factor was not something that entitled the holders to a patent. Colorado recently became the 13th state to ban gender rating on health insurance premiums, which is the practice of charging women more than men for the same insurance. Two studies have shown that 30-year-old non-smoking women were previously charged up to 48 percent more for the same plan than 30-year-old men who did smoke, despite the fact that none of the plans offered maternity care. The new bill makes situations like this illegal.
image: the opoponax
Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno, a Muslim Malaysian woman who was initially sentenced to six strokes from a rattan cane and a fine equivalent to $1,400 for drinking a beer at a resort, had her sentence commuted to three weeks of community service following attention drawn to the situation by human rights groups. Had she received the original sentencing, she would have been the first woman in Malaysia to be caned.
A study by investment bank Goldman Sachs JBWere has found that while Australia has made progress in terms of having women in the workplace, there is still a disproportionate number of men in skilled labour positions. This caused a problem for Australia when, during a bull market period, they suffered from a lack of skilled labour, an issue the study suggests could be solved by training more women in the workforce. Overall, narrowing this labour gap has the potential to raise Australia’s GDP by 11 percent.
The Parliamentary Forum on Children, based in New Delhi and headed by Lok Sabha Speaker Meira Kumar, has proposed that girls be allocated a certain number of seats at school and that India undertake a program of child-budgeting along the lines of its existing gender-budgeting program, which provides specific programs for women.
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Germany’s women’s curling team recently won the world championships in Swift Current, Canada, where Andrea Schopp became the oldest skip ever to win a World Championship. She last won the event in 1988 and the 22-year span between her victories is believed to be a record as well.
Two women in the UK were recently arrested for attempting to smuggle a dead body onto a plane bound for Berlin. The women tried to bring the body of a deceased male relative in a wheelchair and wearing sunglasses on board, while claiming he was merely asleep. They were arrested, released on bail, and await further questioning.
In Quebec, a province of Canada where just 25 women are said to wear the niqab, the government is taking steps to ban women who are wearing the religious garment from attending school, receiving medical care, and taking photographs for government-issued ID such as driver’s licenses.
Iranian photographer and filmmaker Shirin Neshat recently won the Silver Lion award for best director at the Venice Film Festival for her movie Women Without Men, which follows the lives of four women in Iran in 1953. The film has been receiving great reviews and will be released BAB across the US over the course of 2010. Being A Broad April 2010
THE LITTLE THINGS
WE LOVE IN JAPAN e. I love how absolutely random Japan can be sometimes, which is why I was completely intrigued when I heard about the shop in Sangenjaya where you can fish for goldfish out of a stocked pond. The little building has been there since 1966 and some of the catch-and-release fishers we saw seemed to be practically pros, easily hooking the little fish. With two friends in tow I paid the ¥600 hourly charge to rent a teeny tiny fishing rod, put some fish food on the end of my line, and sat back to (rather unsuccessfully) bring in the catch. Bizarre, funny, and almost relaxing, this is a great afternoon expedition to try at least once. Find it at 4-18-1 Taishido, Setagaya-ku, Tokyo, or tel. 033412-3950.—NW
images: Poken S.A.
a. I love this keitai strap album! It’s cheap to mail to family and friends abroad (at just three and a half by four centimetres), good quality, ¥790 each, and only takes a few days to process. I noticed a photo ordering machine in the corner of our local drug mart (WELCIA) with a sample of such an album. Since then I have noticed this same machine in a other supermarkets and drugstores. Anyway, I took a SD card and got the staff to help me order. You need 20 photos to fill the wee hard-paged album. www.jumbo.co.jp/shop/ strapmini.html—SK
b. This isn’t technically Japanese, but I love to pass a few spare minutes of time watching this girl entertainingly muse about day-to-day life. You may have already heard about this, but it’s a YouTube channel called Community Channel, done by Natalie Tran. This is the most recent one (and a bit shorter than usual), but please go through the previous ones—her everygirl observations are hilarious! www.youtube. com/user/communitychannel#p/u/1/ H3O1tcqVYuU—CM
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f. I love to poken! A month ago I saw Peter Shankman (an awesome social media guru) at a seminar and he was promoting poken. What is it? Poken is your social business card and an easy way to share your contact details and online social networks (Facebook, Linked In, Twitter, Skype, Foursquare). It’s small enough to put on your key ring or dangle from your ketai, and comes in a range of designs, personalities and colours —there’s definitely a poken for you. Just hold two poken palms together—high4!—and you’re connected. No need to carry around business cards anymore, just poken! They have even organised events where people get together and poken. Check it out at http://poken.jp/en.—AD
c. I love the sound of the American Embassy Community Sidewalk Sale! It’s a great chance for everyone to shop until they drop. Everyone is invited to come to the annual event, which will take place on Saturday, May 15, from 9am–2:00pm at the American Embassy Housing Compound.
The Compound is located at 2-1-1 Roppongi, Minato-ku, Tokyo. Please be aware that only the Grew Gate Entrance will be open. All bags will be inspected when entering and Photo ID is required for admittance. No parking is available and no pets are allowed.—LW
d. I love the work that the Tokyo English Lifeline (TELL) does, as well as any chance to spend the afternoon around the Imperial Palace, which is why I’m so excited for their 11th annual Walk for Charity and Runathon to be held on
Saturday, May 1. The cost of registration is ¥3,500 in advance or ¥4,500 on the day, and there is a five or ten kilometre run as well as a five kilometre walk to chose from. For more information, visit: www. telljp.com.—LW
g. I love taking photos in Japan, both since there are beautiful, interesting, unique, and just plain wacky scenes around every corner, but also because it’s the only country I’ve visited where everyone, tourist or not, is always taking photos—I never feel out of place taking out my camera. That said, my small point-and-shoot digital camera doesn’t do justice to many of the shots I’d like to be taking, and my digital SLR is great, but huge. I recently realised that I hadn’t used my SLR in nearly two years, due entirely to the size, and decided to look for a smaller model. I was so thrilled to discover the new micro 4:3 cameras on the market, and now I love my Olympus PEN EP-1. These cameras have a different mechanism to an SLR, without a mirror, which allows the body of the camera to be smaller, yet you still get the flexibility of interchangeable lenses and all of the control, in terms of ISO, exposure, white balance, and plenty of other factors that you would find on an SLR. So far I’m finding that it’s fairly easy to use, though absolutely packed with features, and has some really fun art modes, which allow you to use soft focus, grainy film, a pin hole effect, and plenty of others. It also shoots HD video and—one of my favourite aspects—the metal body is based on a 1959 Olympus model, combining cutting edge technology with a really fun, retro design. http://asia.olympus-imaging.com/ products/dslr/ep1/special—DTS
OF YEAR by Gabbi Bradshaw
image: natashalcd
“Was it an exam? Teasing? The pressure? He was so young...”
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t’s that time again. Blue tarps, white cans of Yebisu beer, banana-flavoured Kit Kats, curryseasoned Meiji puffs, specially flavoured frappuccinos, and pink and green splashed everywhere. It’s also the time of year when State Minister for Consumer Affairs and Gender Equality, Mizuho Fukushima, hands out free tissue to people at the train stations, especially men between 40 and 60 years old. It’s a time of sore throats, earaches, and stuffy heads. Cherry blossoms, plum blossoms, and blooming blossoms. In the States, it’s ‘The Dance.’ The Sweet Sixteen. The Elite Eight. The March Madness of college basketball. In Japan, it’s also March Madness. Of another kind. A recent headline read Government Fears March Suicide Madness.1
Early this morning I received a text from my friend. It read, “Saw something horrible on my run this morning.” My stomach sank. I wanted to text, but knew I needed to call. “It was dark when I left for my run this morning. He was only a boy. I’m not sure if he was in high school or college. He was so young. He had so much to live for. Why? I ran by that tree when it was dark. I didn’t see him. Was he there? When I came back, all these awful people were staring. Looking at this boy. Somebody’s son. Somebody’s brother. Somebody’s student. Was it an exam? Teasing? The pressure? He was so young...” The rest of the day, I kept thinking about what my friend said. And the boy. Did he ask for help? Did his friends see signs? Did he live nearby? Did he have a copy of The Suicide Manual? Or was it the uniquely intense stress due to the examination hell (shiken jigoku) that not only generates a basic drive for Japan’s economic success but also contributes to a high rate of young people committing suicide?2 Suicide has a history in Japan. In fact, it’s been labelled as “Japan’s export” by Professor Ueno. Hara-kiri of samurai warriors, kamikaze of WWII pilots, and special names given for the suicide of a mother-child (boshi-shinjyu) and an entire family (ikka-shinnjyu); Japan has a problem.
And with the end of the school term and fiscal year, suicides increase in March in Japan. In response, the government has begun a threemonth suicide prevention campaign, because in the past 12 years there have been over 30,000 suicides annually in Japan. Japan is in the top ten of suicide rates in the world. An interview on Current.com claims that “almost all Japanese have tried it.” I’m reminded of my friend who is a successful lawyer and Japanese. One night, over wine, she told me that when she was in high school she tried to kill herself by swallowing a whole bottle of pills. She slept for two days, and nobody noticed. Not her mother. Not her brother. Not even her grandmother. So she kept on living. Twenty years later, she still thinks about it. Suicide. At dinner, the boy was still on my mind and heart. I told my friends about the boy. One of my friends who shares a cubicle with salarymen answered, “With the bad economy there are sure to be more job cuts at my company. I keep my head down and work my late hours.” Long work hours are a contributing factor. Severe unemployment, bankruptcies, and being liable for multiple consumer loans are also quoted as factors. When doing my own research, I was disgusted to read that some lawyers and other experts say that consumer loan companies harass debtors to the point of suicide and have much to do with the suicide rate. Japanese nonbank lenders even take out life insurance policies, which include suicide payouts. In 2005, 15 percent of all suicides resulted in payouts.3 The government is working on a plan to reduce suicide by 20 percent by 2016. Some of the measures include workplace counselling and reviewing long work hours, monitoring of websites that promote suicide, upgrading hotlines for distressed youth, and better early detection and treatment programs.4 One hundred people commit suicide a day in Japan. In the time it took me to write and research this column, 16 Japanese killed themselves. There are choices. There are people who care. There is help. It is the time of year to change the statistics. BAB
Tokyo girl
THAT TIME If you or somebody you know is at risk of suicide or depression, contact one of the resources below. Japan Suicide Hotlines: Befrienders International, Tokyo 03-5286-9090, www1.odn.ne.jp/~ceq16010 BI Suicide Prevention Centre, Osaka 06-4395-4343, www.spc-osaka.org Tokyo English Lifeline counselling: 03-5774-0992, face-to-face: 03-3498-0231, www.telljp.com FIND (Federation of Inochi no Denwa) 0120-738-556, 03-3264-4343, www.find-j.jp/ zenkoku.html, www.inochinodenwa.or.jp Article sources: www.let sjapan.markmode .com/ index.php/2010/03/06/governmentfears-march-suicide-madness 2. www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/7233479 3. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_ in_Japan 4. http://tinyurl.com/y8mrjrv [New York Times] 1.
A V-Day Benefit Screening of Until the Violence Stops, in Tokyo One in three women will be raped, beaten, or mutilated in her lifetime. This UN statistic is appalling, disgusting, shocking, revolting, unjust, hideous, sad, tragic, and stoppable. Inspired by the response Eve Ensler received from The Vagina Monologues, V-Day (www.vday.org) has raised over $70 million in 130 countries to stop the violence against women. In 2009, over 4,200 events were held. In 2010, you can be part of an event in Tokyo. Until the Violence Stops is a documentary of truth, courage, and hope. It is a global celebration of women and men who have joined together to stop the violence against women. Join this fierce, wild, unstoppable movement on Tuesday, April 20. Women and men are invited to a screening of this film at Ben’s Café (http://benscafe.com). The event will start at 7pm. A ¥1,000 or greater donation is requested. All money raised will be donated to a Japanese organisation whose mission is to stop human trafficking in Japan. Be a part of the unstoppable V-Day movement! Here’s a sneak peek of the documentary: http://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=v4xJxYvrX8w. For more information on V-Day, read Gabbi’s February 2010 Tokyo girl column.
Being A Broad April 2010
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TOKYO by Karen Regn
M
y skirt is too short. At least that’s what my salsa teacher tells me on the way to the club as we walk through the streets of Roppongi. I’m surprised. Aren’t salsa clubs sexy? I didn’t expect to be told that a salsa club would require me to dress conservatively. I’m wearing a black, pleated skirt, not so short by Tokyo standards. Why would I need a longer skirt than for a typical night out? As we weave through crowded Roppongi streets to Salsa Sudada, Billy Jean and Thriller blare out of the open doors of clubs and restaurants. Tonight happens to be the night following Michael Jackson’s death. I see one clubgoer wearing a red leather jacket and another doorman wearing a sequined glove and fedora. When we arrive at the club, I notice the floor is packed so tightly that some couples are dancing in the aisles in front of their tables. Sudada is supposed to serve the best mojitos in Tokyo, but I am skeptical that a club in this gritty area can produce a mojito with the fresh mint flavour of authentic ones in Latin America. Dancing with Victor, it feels the same as any practice session in his tiny apartment, except
“I suddenly wish I’d started learning salsa years ago.” image: iStockphoto.com/ Vasiliki Varvaki
real-life story
MOJITOS IN
the dance floor and takes my hands distractedly in his, the cigarette still in his mouth. We find the beat and start to dance. After a moment he slows the step a bit and turns to tap my original partner, now dancing with a Japanese woman, on the shoulder. The small man takes the cigarette without asking and puts it in his own mouth. My partner turns back to me. All right, it’s time to dance, is the message. He introduces himself, in Spanish-accented English, as Alejandro. He’s half Japanese, half Argentinean, he says. We begin
I have stopped following the beat in my head. Forwiththethefirstvoicetime,
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that now I’m wearing shoes. As Victor and I spin around the floor, I see his point about the skirt. What happens to skirts when one spins? They furl out, and up. Luckily, however, for the moment there are too many people on the dance floor for anyone, including me, trying to get a glance in a wall mirror, to get a clear view. I’m actually grateful for the dense crowd. I remind myself not to spin too fast, praying I don’t flash anyone. A couple of songs later, it’s time to give it a whirl with a new partner. A Japanese man offers me his hand. My extremely energetic partner is smiling hugely, his neck craned up and back, as we merengue at a very fast speed. He is sweating. When the dance is over I exhale “Arigatou” while he wipes his forehead with a handkerchief. We bow slightly to each other. “Arigatou” he responds, still smiling widely. As he leaves, an older Japanese man asks me to dance, then another. Every song is as high-energy as the next and soon I am sweating, too. Several dances later, I’m finishing up with a short Latin partner. Instead of releasing me, he keeps hold of my hand and leads me to where his friend is leaning with one elbow against the bar. The friend has curly hair and dark tanned arm muscles bulging out from under a fitted t-shirt. His extremely handsome features look Japanese. He gazes at me with little interest as he exhales cigarette smoke and taps ash onto a plate on the bar. I wait, not sure what to do. The two men speak Spanish to each other and the friend walks onto
anew and it is immediately clear that Alejandro knows how to salsa. His flowing movements are easy to pair. He grants me a smile when I turn smoothly without breaking the rhythm. I feel myself become a different dancer in his arms. For the first time, I have stopped following the beat with the voice in my head. I have stopped worrying about my skirt. I suddenly wish I’d started learning salsa years ago. But all too soon, the song ends and Alejandro disappears quickly, with only a slight nod. I make my way back to my table a little dizzy, a little out of breath. I wonder if I’ve passed Alejandro’s test. When I return to the table, I find a mojito waiting for me. More women from Victor’s circle have arrived. “Kanpai!” we toast. “To Michael Jackson,” someone adds. The drink is fresh and minty. The sugar tastes harsher than the organic local sugar of the mojitos abroad…but it works. I’m hot and I drink it fast. Handling the two straws in the glass like chopsticks, I eat even the little bits of mint at the bottom. I ask Victor about one dancer whose white clothing, dark skin, and dancing have been catching my eye all evening. Every muscle of his body moves in a seamless flow as he spins a woman whose skirt, which is quite a bit longer than mine, twirls around her beautifully. Victor tells me he is Cuban, a professional dancer passing through on tour. Having seen me watching him, at the next song he steps over to me. As we find the rhythm,
he pulls me in close. His skin is soft and smooth and smells of a vague, earthy cologne. After a few turns he dips me and when I come up, he reaches up the back of my head into my hair at the roots and gives it a sharp tug. I’m shocked. I didn’t know that was done on the dance floor. I guess the pros know all the tricks. As we dance, it becomes painfully obvious that I’m still a novice. I turn in the wrong direction several times. What a flop I’ve turned out to be. My partner repeatedly redirects me, helping me find the way back. I am disappointed, but my partner consoles me with encouraging smiles. When the salsa fades, Thriller’s opening chords come over the speakers and Sudada erupts with screaming and whooping. Dancers who had been seated throw themselves onto the floor. Amid the chaos, I make a move to head back to my friends. In the next moment, I feel a hard whack to the side of my head. I have no idea what has hit me and grab my head in pain. Victor has seen it and is rushing toward me from my right. But I am caught up from the opposite direction, my head embraced by my professional Cuban partner who is kissing my hair and head and apologising profusely. Apparently he’d headbutted me in his excitement. One by one the professional salsa dancers take turns paying tribute to the deceased king with impromptu Jackson impressions. I fall back with my friends and we cheer them on until halfway through Vincent Price’s rap, when glasses are raised around the room to toast Michael. I start dancing the Thriller zombie dance. While simultaneously nursing my head and my second mojito, I scan the crowd for my next partner. Thriller is ending, and the rhythm of the salsa is BAB starting to play through. An extended version of Mojitos in Tokyo was a finalist in the Wanderwomen Writes competition this past fall. Karen is a writer, teacher, and dance enthusiast. Please direct comments and questions to karen.regn@gmail.com.
STORM OF IDIOCY by Tracey Taylor
image provided by Tracey Taylor
Tracey on the big—though ill-fated—day.
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To find out what can be accomplished when you put the mind and body into motion, well, that’s something that changes a person deep down inside.” My quote from last month’s BAB article. Unfortunately, when you have a bladder like mine and it’s raining, sleeting, and 35,000 people are wearing compression tights, the mind and body don’t get a chance to hear me sing Shine Like a Superstar... My Tokyo Marathon experience has been affectionately nicknamed The Perfect Storm of Idiocy. Last month I told my story. My battle with obesity. My perseverance and resolve. My 50 kilograms lost in 18 months and my world changing in ways that I could never imagine. The response and support from BAB readers was overwhelming and it seems many people are eagerly awaiting the equally inspiring part two of my marathon journey. However, not everything in life goes as planned. However, I did promise drama. In that you won’t be disappointed. On February 28, Dee and I lined up for our debut marathon in Tokyo. We’d woken up to pouring rain, naturally. I rarely venture outside on cold, wintery, wet days, let alone go for a 42.195 kilometre run on one. At 7am, the tunnels of Shinjuku Station were transformed into an underground warm-up room. A veritable mass of menthol cream, impressive stretches, and taping. We toileted, dropped off our bags, and climbed the hill to the starting block. Freezing at the start line in our lovely plastic bags. The temperature at the start was 5ºC. After 30 minutes it dropped to 4ªC and never went up. Our feet were wet and our hands blocks of ice. But we were so excited we could hardly stand it. The gun went off at 9:10am. We eventually got over the start line about 9:25, dancing to Footloose. So we started to run. And for the first time in a long time I think we both loved it again. We were running for something. We felt exhilarated and it made the cold fade. Three kilometres went in a blur. I think Dee high fived everyone on the right side of the road. We did our first five kilometres in about 30 minutes, which for us is incredible, especially as we are usually shufflers.
But of course it is here that things go haywire. seven kilometres in, I needed the toilet. Why will always remain a mystery. I had just been. Hadn’t over hydrated on Amino Supli. But it was cold and wet, mixed with nerves and excitement and so nature called. There was nothing to do but go. We stopped at a conbeni. One toilet, at least twenty people in line. Do the math. Forget it. Keep running. Get to eight kilometres, see more portaloos. We had been warned that the toilet situation is chaotic and ridiculously crowded up to ten kilometres. I urged Dee to go on. But in it together to the end, she stayed by my side, both shivering uncontrollably. We waited near Takabashi. Four loos for a line that snaked up and down the street. We waited and watched despondently as thousands ran past us. Prior to this we were in such a nice position. Situated just behind the 5:30 pace setters, and we’d found a TV crew following some talent. And if there’s ever a chance for us to get on the telly, you know we’ll be there. But we thought, just do the toilet thing and get it over with. So we stayed in line. It started raining more heavily. My body heat was all gone. Waiting...15 minutes...shivering. Then the lovely staff came up to us in their official yellow jackets and told us that the train station had toilets for runners. It looked faster. It had to be warmer down there. We ran downstairs. Two toilets for the ladies and twenty people in the line. Factor in that everyone is wearing tights. And random pedestrians were using the loos too...sigh. Finally I used the facilities about 35 minutes after we first stopped and breathed a sigh of relief. We ran upstairs from the station—and of course it is…snowing. There were hardly any runners left as we wrung out our sopping wet gloves. Only the toilet people, the injured, and the stragglers. I looked at my watch as we came up to the 10 kilometre checkpoint. We had run the next 5 kilometres in about 35 minutes and then there was the 35 minute or more toilet wait...so that was over an hour for the next 5km. 1:10. So it was time to get a move on and make up some time. Just as we were getting the sprint on, an official put a big orange rope in front of us and screamed “time over!” We are all confused and started asking what was happening. “time over” the yellow coat officials keep yelling through the rain. “You must retire because you have to complete the ten kilometres in 1:54:00.” The big official clock was flashing 1:54:48. Yes, we were 48 seconds too late. I looked down at my watch—and started bellowing “You’re all wrong! My watch says one hour forty minutes.” Showing them my watch… “Aa so ka!” Said the little old man with scissors trying to snip off the electronic timer from my shoe ”that time is from when you passed over the start line at 9:25am—not from the 9:10am gun time.” So you are out. Get on the shuttle bus. You’re going home. Yes, I had made the mistake of
starting my watch as we crossed the start line— thinking this was my official time. I didn’t realise that everyone—from blocks A through to K—gets their timers started at 9:10am even though some of us were more than a kilometre away from the start. My mistake, I now know. While all this was going on, the other people from the toilet queues starting arriving. I showed my Garmin to anyone who looked official. The recently married couple who were doing this as a celebration to start their marriage were in tears, the girl next to Dee inconsolable on the phone, some professional looking runners started screaming about the lack of toilets. Dee explaining to anyone in a yellow jacket that we were in “the toiley line” forever and that this was absolutely not fair. And then the big yellow Hato ‘bus of shame’ came and we all piled on. There were tears. A nurse got on and called out: “Does anyone need medical attention?” Someone yelled back: “This is not the injured bus. We are the toilet people.” And that is how our first marathon experience was. Highly emotional, so joyous and freakishly fun for the first ten kilometres. And then it was over before it had even begun. So many “what if ” moments. It was educational, I have learnt a lot from my many rookie mistakes. Yes, it really was the perfect storm of idiocy—ours and theirs, as we factor in the bitter cold, the weather, the recent popularity of those compression tights, and just not enough loos. Almost relieved in hindsight to have been cut after ten kilometres, rather than much later in the race as was the case with other friends, also due to the toilet lines. Next year, I’ve already decided I’m wearing my new Marathon Omutsu (The Marathon Diaper/Nappy). Really. Good, positive things came out of it though. I realised that I can run ten kilometres and not feel tired or even feel like I have exerted myself at all. And I like it. It’s a miracle. I have a long ways to go to become anything other than a fun runner, but for me that is the point. A little over 20 months ago I couldn’t walk to the 7-11 down the road without having a coronary. But in the marathon— well, ten kilometres done and I felt like we had just had a little stroll. That’s a phenomenal feeling and one I never ever thought would be a part of this life. The atmosphere was amazing. Even with a tsunami warning. And just running the streets of Tokyo and seeing the city like that was almost worth not finishing. Even if it was only from Shinjuku to Hibiya. But I will run a marathon this year. Count on it. Anyone up for the Honolulu Marathon in December? BAB (I’ve checked. There’s no time limit.) For more photos and video visit http:// offtheplanet.typepad.com/37frames.
Being A Broad April 2010
real-life story
THE PERFECT
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boonies guide
by Aiko Miyagi
Get your cameras ready when you travel to Okinawa! image: ippei + janine
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OKINAWA In our recent readers’ survey, many of you told us that you’d like more content related to the boonies, and we agree! To start including more content that isn’t based in Tokyo, we’re introducing what we hope will be a semi-regular column, our boonies guide. On these pages, broads living in the boonies will guide us through their towns, giving practical information for both the casual tourist and anyone who might be moving to the area. If you want to share information about your town, or if you have another boonies-based article you’re interested in writing, please get in touch! editor@beinga-broad.com Where do you live? In Awase, a three-minute walk from the beach, right on the border of Kitanakagusuku and Okinawa City. How do you get to your town? You need a car here outside of Naha (home to the island’s only train). Taking the bus is not recommended unless you enjoy waiting around. Although it’s not the worst place in the country to be stuck outside waiting for the bus for an hour. How many people live there? About 15,000 people live in Awase. What brought you there? My then-boyfriend Rody, a native Okinawan who’s got a lower tolerance for cold and crowded places than I do, had no desire to live where I was on the mainland (Yokohama), so I didn’t have much of a choice. Now that we’re married it’s nice to know the warmer, less crowded states have become options as well, but for most non-career purposes I’ve really grown to like it here. What is your favourite part about living in Okinawa? Neo Park, the interactive zoo up north; the beach; the spacious park near my apartment; being able to go out and get boiled taro any time I feel like it. People are also really friendly once you get to know them—the family next door lets Rody and me take their big dog for walks sometimes, and once when I burned myself cooking and ran outside in a panic not knowing what to do, they pushed their aloe plant near the fence and told me to take as much as I needed. What is your least favourite part about living there? There aren’t a whole lot of job options here, especially if you want to work for more than ¥650 per hour and not teach English (you can’t really accomplish both). Well, I take it back— you can make almost ¥1,000 per hour not teaching English if you live in Naha, but then
you end up paying in the form of either higher city rent or commutation time and gas money. And we foreigners need all the money we can get, because it costs about ¥30,000 more to go home than it would from Tokyo. How long have you lived there? Almost two years. It took me about a year to really feel at home here, whereas in Tokyo it took like a day. Being new in the boonies is like being the new kid in school—it takes a while to find your niche and make friends. Especially when you don’t fit into either of the available cliques, those being local Japanese and American military. Where is the best place to buy the food you miss from home? The Commissary (on-base supermarket) is like your Costco, and you don’t even have to buy in bulk to get the lowest prices you’ve ever seen. A lot of base pass holders are pretty understanding—they’ve seen the green and purple food off-base and are kind enough to sign in a fellow Westerner to help her get what they consider to be normal food. You can also get Skippy and other Western foods off base at Jimmy’s, but you’ll pay ridiculous prices (and Skippy isn’t real peanut butter anyway). Where you can you buy books and media in your native language? Again, there’s the base for books, and DVDs are available in English and Japanese anywhere. Getting my textbooks for my online master’s program has been somewhat of a challenge, but if you look many textbooks are available for purchase in online format. Have you got any recommendations for doctors/dentists (either that you’ve used or that friends have told you about)? I’ve always been more hesitant to trust doctors than most, and anti-American military sentiment that, because of ignorance, extends to all foreigners at first glance doesn’t help, but if you really have to go to the doctor or dentist,
having a local friend by your side (even if you’re confident in your Japanese ability) and going to the clinic he or she has trusted for years is probably your safest bet. Where do the foreign women hang out in your area? There’s a street known as Gate 2 coming out of the Kadena base gate of the same number that’s home to the greatest off-base concentration of foreigner-centered bars on the island. If you want to meet other foreigners, but have no one to sign you onto base, that’s the place to go. American Village in Chatan also has a lot of foreigner-packed hangouts (they’re across from a base entrance as well). How big or active an expat community is there in your area? If you want to be part of a foreign community in Okinawa, expect 99 percent of the members to be military-affiliated. I’ve only run into a few others like myself who are just here, and not on government assignment. And all but one of those were here for school, so of course they had their own circles and clubs. What is your town known for? A lot! Okinawans are very proud of their land’s special characteristics, which differ from those of the mainland, and each city has its own special meibutsu [product or cuisine associated with a region]. Ginowan, where I work, is one of the two cities known for taro—those scrumptious lavender potatoes. And Awase is the only place I know of where you can get uni sauce (a very rich bright orange sauce you put on grilled seafood). Good stuff! Who is the most interesting local in your town and why? I may be biased, but my husband Rody is the most interesting Okinawan I’ve met. He’s extremely progressive even compared to most Tokyo people, especially considering he’s from a place where a lot of people are ignorant
image: Aiko Miyagi
Americafest is a chance for locals to visit base.
image: Aiko Miyagi
Kadena and Foster [military bases] visit local public schools once or twice a month to interact with kids in English. If you go to the principal of a public or private school, I’m sure they’d be happy to talk to you about reading some English books to kids at the library or something similar. I’ve also heard of kids volunteering in taro fields during summer vacation—I’m sure adults who love taro or farming in general could do that too! Best place to grab a pint with friends? What about brunch? Cafe SomeTime near my place has comfy couches and wonderfully large cakes! For a drink, though, I’d have to go home, open a bottle of wine in front of the TV, and ask everyone to bring their sleeping bags. I feel like every establishment that sells alcohol here should get together and lobby for an island-wide train system similar to Tokyo’s. It would be great for business, and it would prevent people like my husband from getting hit by drunk drivers and having to spend a month in the hospital. What groups or sports teams are there for foreign women to join in your community? Again, most of the groups around are through universities or the military. I would make a friend who belonged to a group I wanted to join, then ask her to get me in (although some uni clubs are open to the public). For sports you can just get a group of friends together and go play at the spacious Exercise Park and rec centre. Do you have any funny stories about living in your community? I don’t really have any Okinawa-specific bloopers, as most of mine occurred when I was a newbie in Tokyo, but I find this one from my first and only stint as an elementary ALT pretty funny. I asked a sixth-grader named Ryuya what he wanted for his birthday and his reply could
boonies guide
about anything foreign and that he never left the country prior to meeting me. He’s just so accepting of people’s differences and nothing fazes him, not surrogate parenting or adoption or gaijin who speak perfect Japanese or women with cleaning skills comparable to those of college boys. I’ve never met anyone so openminded in Japan, much less in Okinawa. If you had a friend or family member visiting, what are three must-do attractions you would send them to? Number one would definitely be Neo Park (the safari-style zoo). It’s just the epitome of everything good about Okinawa (good food, nice people, gorgeous jungle scenery, cute animals, cheap admission), and it’s something locals can enjoy as well as tourists. Then Okinawa World (slightly more touristy but educational) and the Southeast Botanical Gardens (for flower lovers, but beware the abundant hand-sized spiders). What’s the best time of year to visit? Why? If you don’t like it super hot, come in April to avoid the rainy season in May and June. Me, I like July—sunny and hot with blue skies every day! Where do you get your hair done? I am not the person to ask about hair—I haven’t gotten even a non-professional haircut since 2005! In Tokyo I used to let friends going to beauty school practice on me, so if I was thinking about getting my hair done here, I’d probably go to the local beauty school and see if anyone was willing to do my hair for free. How can a foreign woman volunteer in your community? There are tons of ways to volunteer if you like kids. I used to volunteer as an interpreter at the AmerAsian School for a hapa boy whose English ability wasn’t advanced enough to keep up in class, and a bunch of people I know from
only be interpreted as “I want my ass.” I asked him to repeat it several times to clarify, but he maintained that he wanted his own bottom for his birthday. Finally I couldn’t hold in the giggles any longer. When students asked what he had said that was so funny, I told them—their teacher looked slightly upset (more at Ryuya, always the class clown, than at me), but I had all the kids cracking up. Then Ryuya explained in Japanese that he had meant “I want my own Earth,” and his teacher looked relieved. It was an important lesson for all in the importance of pronouncing your rs and ths. Anything else you would want BAB readers to know about your town? If there’s anything else in particular anyone wants to know, email me at aiko@being-aBAB broad.com! Getting there: Okinawa is accessible by plane, with flights arriving in Naha Airport from most areas of Japan (Tokyo, Osaka, Sapporo, Nagoya, Fukuoka, and others), as well as a handful of international destinations including Shanghai and Manila. The Naha Airport also acts as a jumping off point for inter-island flights. You can also take a ferry from several points in Japan, including Tokyo, Nagoya, Kobe, and Kagoshima. Once in Okinawa, it is possible to take a monorail from the Naha Airport to central Naha. Beyond that, public transit is limited to buses, and a rental car is recommended. For further transit information, visit www.japan-guide.com/e/e7116.html. Useful links: • http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Okinawa • http://wikitravel.org/en/Okinawa • http://okinawa.com • www.japan-guide.com/list/e1247.html •www.ocvb.or.jp/index.php?lang=en
Aiko’s local area of Awase. Being A Broad April 2010
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working
WE PROFILE:
GEMMA NOKES of Tokyo International Players/Pippin Name: Gemma Nokes Nationality: British Qualifications: BA (Hons) Communication; LAMDA Gold Verse & Prose; LAMDA Gold Acting Job title: TIP actress Employer: TIP Time in this job: third TIP season Job description: I play Catherine in the forthcoming TIP musical production Pippin. General requirements: There aren’t any for the most part, except for a love of theatre and performing. Each TIP season covers a variety of theatre—last season included Pratchett and Brecht and this season Steinbeck and Schwartz, amongst others—so there is something for everyone and parts to suit young and old. To be involved in the musical productions, a musical ear and sense of rhythm is useful (hence it’s a musical), but there are speaking parts so it’s not always essential, depending on the actual musical. Japanese requirement: None. TIP is the longest running English theatre company in Tokyo, produced and played by a dedicated group of volunteers with a passion for English theatre. General conditions: Usually rehearsal periods are around 8–12 weeks. At the initial stages, rehearsals are usually just once or twice a week, but as we get closer to the opening night it’s usually three times a week or perhaps more, so stamina and commitment are important. A sense of humour and patience can also come in handy, and as a result most TIP casts are pretty fun groups to be around. How she found this job: I auditioned for a show in December 2009. This was probably the hardest audition process I’ve been through in a long, long time. We had to sing a song and do some cold reading of scenes from the show, which was followed by a two-phase
Gemma Nokes from TIP’s Pippin.
Issues affecting her as a woman: I can’t say there are any issues that I’ve been particularly affected by as a woman within TIP but I guess, broadly speaking, most shows are still dominated by male leads and cast members so from that perspective there are naturally more parts for men. However, I’ve been fortunate
IP is the longest running English theatre company in Tokyo, produced and played by a dedicated group of T volunteers with a passion for English theatre. Interesting stories: We’ve had quite a few random coincidences within the TIP community with people coming from the same colleges and having met or worked together in other countries before being reunited through TIP. At my first rehearsal for A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum two years ago, I met someone who’d registered just a few months before with me as a candidate looking for a job. Quite amusing when we realised it was the first show for us both and that we were both twirling ribbons together in the opening number!
enough to be cast as some formidable and funny female characters such as Lady Ramkin (Terry Pratchett’s Guards! Guards!), Queen Elizabeth (Shakespeare’s R3) and Widow Corney (Oliver!). Advice: Just do it! If you have any interest in the theatre—from acting onstage to helping out as backstage crew, front of house or making costumes—it’s really interesting and introduces you to a fun-loving Tokyo community. I hadn’t done anything since high school and after making a new year’s resolution to get back into theatre and craft a hobby again, I very nervously auditioned for A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum. I was cast as a chorus member and from the first rehearsal I felt right at home again. I hadn’t realised just how much I missed it and how much I loved it. Other jobs done in Japan: I came to Japan teaching English for GEOS. I did that for just over a year and for almost four years now my full-time job has been with Robert Walters as a BAB Recruitment Consultant. Tokyo International Players presents the musical Pippin When: May 13–16, 2010 at 7pm everyday and 1pm on May 15 and 16. Where: Theater Sun-Mall, Shinjuku For information and to book tickets, visit www.tokyoplayers.org.
all images: provided by TIP.
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choreography section! It was so much fun but hard work. Whilst I have been known to strut my stuff on dance floors around Tokyo in the last few years, I hadn’t done choreography like that (Fosse style) for years so it was a shock to the system— sweat, fun, and cheers! Best thing: I love the whole process of being in a TIP show. For Pippin, we did some character and vocal workshops right at the beginning, which were great foundations to get a good understanding of what the production team wanted from us. The bonding over the weeks that follow, the giggles and silliness, and finally the show coming together in the few weeks before opening night is amazing to be part of. Tech week (the week of the show itself, when we get into the actual theatre and onto the stage itself to rehearse) has a great buzz—a mix of excitement and anxiety that’s hard to replicate. Worst thing: When the curtain goes down on the last performance. I always feel quite teary, but the cast party that usually follows soon after makes it a little more bearable.
Gemma and the cast in rehearsals for Pippin.
INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL? by Leigh Wellsview
Hito Koe Kurabu has taken the tragic disappearance of Kaori Nomura and used it as inspiration to help area children.
The school will feature a mostly English curriculum and be geared towards preschool and kindergarten-aged children. Slated to open in April 2011, if not earlier, the school is currently seeking a head teacher. As opposed to entering into a currently running school, the head teacher at this new school will have the unique opportunity to act more like an owner-operator, making many of the key decisions. The school will open in a twostorey space near Minami-Makigahara station on the Sotetsu line, an area with many families with young children, few schools, and no international ones at all. The new head teacher will be in charge of designing and organising a renovation of the space to be implemented by the club. In addition, the head teacher will have the opportunity to design and implement the curriculum, recruit faculty and students, and manage the day-to-day operations (including teaching). While the club is able to offer a small salary for the position, because they plan to have their head teacher operating more as an owner-operator, they will be given the majority of the profits as the school begins to earn them.
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n 1991, then eight-year-old Kaori Nomura disappeared from her Yokohama-area neighbourhood and hasn’t been seen since. Walking home from calligraphy class, as she did regularly, Nomura
It is an ideal opportunity for a talented, passionate individual who has everything but the capital needed “ to succeed.” As anyone used to deciding between slowly working up the ranks of an established organisation or risking home and hearth to fund their own venture will recognise, this is
image: iStockphoto.com/Christopher Futcher
disappeared without credible witnesses to the event. It was a shocking and tragic event, especially in a country where it is usual to see children as young as six or seven going to school on their own on the trains and safety is so highly regarded. While her family wished desperately for a break in the case (one that has not yet come), a concerned group started Shakai Hojin Hito Koe Kurabu ( Just One Word), a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to both finding Kaorichan and ensuring the welfare of children in the Yokohama area. Up to this point, much of the work of the organisation has centered on handing out fliers with information about Nomura’s disappearance at festivals and train stations as well as setting up events for area children throughout the year. Recently, the group decided that the best way to further its mission of promoting the welfare of children is to promote the education of children, and has therefore decided to open a not-forprofit international school in the Yokohama area. The school will have the overall goal of “[serving] the community and working to bring together individuals from different cultural backgrounds,” and is being started partially in response to area parents’ concerns about a lack of daycare and kindergarten space for their children.
For the right person, this exciting position has loads of potential.
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DO YOU WANT TO START AN an incredibly unique opportunity for the right educator. Gabriel Lee, who is helping the club to fill this position says, “they want to sponsor a talented individual who wants to start a school but does not have the financial backing to do so. They are not interested in operating the school, they just want there to be a school. So it is an ideal opportunity for a talented, passionate individual who has everything but the capital needed to succeed.” Sound good? See below for more information about this BAB unique opportunity. Interested in applying? Please send a CV, cover letter, and three references to the address below: Hito Koe Kurabu ( Just One Word) International School, c/o YKK Yamato Group (attention: Gabriel), 112-6 Kashiwacho, Asahi-ku Yokohama 241-0835 You may also email your materials to: gabriel@yamato-gr.co.jp. In addition, and in order for the selection committee to get to know you a bit better, please answer the following questions with your application: 1) Do you feel confident that you can start an international preschool from scratch? For example, what experiences or skills do you have that will help you do this? Are you able to design a facility and work with Japanese contractors to build that facility? What have you learned from past experience that will help you design this facility? 2) Do you feel confident that you can recruit potential students for an international preschool? What experiences or skills do you have that will help you do this in Japan? 3) Are you interested in working as a owner/operator (meaning that your pay will be determined by the profit of the school)? What would be your minimum monthly salary for the beginning when the school has no income? 4) Briefly explain your educational philosophy and outline how it will affect the curriculum of the school. 5) Please rate your Japanese language ability. If you have low ability in the Japanese language, explain how you will overcome difficulties such as liaising with Japanese contractor/builders during the construction phase of the project. How about meeting with Japanese parents and recruiting students? Japanese ability is not a requirement, but you will probably need a bilingual person on your team. Where will you find such a person?
Being A Broad April 2010
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learning
THE ULTIMATE JAPANESE PHRASEBOOK by Emily Downey
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pon delivering the brief for this review, my editor mentioned that this Japanese phrasebook might be below my Japanese level. Hearing this, I immediately chuckled to myself. Yes, I have been in Japan for ten years and have acquired a Japanese husband and three bilingual children, so it’s normal to assume that my Japanese level must be near native; sadly and illogically, this is a misconception. Despite studying Japanese in language schools and living in a Japanese-speaking home, my ability is still lacking. My husband equates my language skills with those of our three-year-old, to which I invariably reply mukatsuku or ‘you make me sick,’ not a common expression for a three year old! I was very much looking forward to this review as it gave me a chance to restart my ongoing journey with learning the language.
Boldly yet aptly titled, The Ultimate Japanese Phrasebook was written by well-known Japanbased writer and author Kit Pancoast Nagamura of Kodansha publishing and The Japan Times. The phrases were carefully translated by her awardwinning colleague, Kyoko Tsuchiya. Only those phrases that were useful and translatable were included and the nuance of each was carefully followed. Thanks to amazon.co.jp, I had the book in my hands less than 24 hours after ordering. I first took a look at the book when my husband and visiting relatives were in the room. Within seconds I was firing colloquial phrases at my husband, much to everyone’s amusement. “You’re a slob, but you are also tall, dark, and handsome” was the first thing I said, all in perfect Japanese. I honestly felt like it was the first time he had really heard me speak colloquially—
ever—at least without him having to translate! I would tell my visitors what I was saying in English at the same time and we would all roar with laughter. Joking aside, I felt I had discovered a really practical tool that was going to add to my solid foundation of everyday Japanese in a very fun and useful way. I was excited and eager to learn more, which is not something I have ever felt when learning Japanese previously. As it says in the blurb at the front, this book has something for everyone, from beginners to advanced speakers, and is small enough to be carried around in your bag. Also included in the ¥2,600 retail price is a CD with all 1,800 sentences, which I immediately added to my iPod to use while working out in the gym. I then put the CD itself in my car stereo to listen to while I am stuck in traffic. I have found that this repetitive and forced learning environment works really well. The book is broken down into 19 easy-toreference chapters that include phrasebook basics such as ‘at the bank, post office, etc.,’ which is essential for tourists or those starting out. Each phrase is written in kana, romaji, and finally in English, and the layout is very clear, making it easy to look up and use what you need. Each phrase is spaced out in separate rows, rather than all lumped together in tiny font as with most phrasebooks. What makes this book truly unique and useful for the more intermediate and advanced learner are chapters covering topics such as ‘shock and awe,’ with phrases such as “What on earth were you thinking!” In the ‘getting and giving opinions’ section, the stand out phrases are “I need to pick your brain on this” and “Here’s my two cents worth.” The comprehensive ‘feelings’ chapter is a fantastic way to really say how you feel in Japanese. From the negative “I can’t stand it anymore” or “I am heartbroken,” to the positive, “I feel on top of the world,” “That was hilarious,” “You are so thoughtful,” there are dozens of useful phrases. The notable ‘private zone’ chapter is a very useful feature for anyone wanting to be or currently in a relationship with a Japanese. The male and female appropriate phrases are specified, so as not to come across as the wrong gender when using the language in these intimate moments. Sections include ‘sweet talk,’ ‘kiss and tell,’ and even ‘climax and pillow talk.’ Things get really graphic in this section and it covers just about everything you would need to say at a time like this! The final chapter, ‘just for fun’ covers unusual situations when you might need the language, such as on road trips, in onsen and ryokan, out and about with your pets, or while exploring the culture.
learning
Interview with Kit Pancoast Nagamura: What inspired you to write the book? After arriving in Japan 18 years ago, I was always wondering how to say things in Japanese, the kinds of phrases we rely on in English. Also, many of my foreign friends would say it was great that I had written phrasebooks for Japanese readers, but where
Are there any similar books, or was there a gap in the market? There are no Japanese phrasebooks as comprehensive as this one. I extensively researched the market both online and by visiting bookstores. I think every reader, whether an English or Japanese speaker, will learn at least something and there are definitely things in the book that no other reference book carries. Who is the target readership? Anyone who has a desire to learn Japanese for everyday, realistic settings. My sister, who doesn’t speak any Japanese, recently wrote me a letter purely in Japanese just by using the book. It was really funny, and shows that even a beginner can have fun with this. On the other end of the scale, Japanese who are looking for more natural English phrases also benefit. How long did the book take to write? About a year, working on it mostly in the evenings. How did you choose your translator?
My husband equates my language skills with those of our three-year-old, to which I invariably reply mukatsuku or ‘you make me sick...’ was the book for them? I had a great editor, Michael Staley, who was also behind the project. I had to change my whole way of thinking as I was used to writing a book from the Japanese reader’s perspective. My editor rejected a lot of my initial phrases and kept telling me to start over and to stay focused on a foreigner’s viewpoint, which helped. I also think a lot of learning materials are very serious in tone. I think it helps to relax when learning a language, and laughter helps the reader to do that. We tried to include a lot of funny things in the book.
Kyoko Tsuchiya is a superb translator, a Tokyo University graduate. We met many years ago while working on translating novels. I discovered then that she has a great sense of humor, and I knew that someday I really wanted a chance to work with her more closely on a project. Also, I have to mention my editor, who is extremely bilingual and has edited and written for dictionaries in the past. I am also bilingual. Even so, we all learned new phrases working on this book. We threw out thousands of phrases and I would say I wrote 10,000 before whittling them down to the 1,800 in the book. Any that
Author Kit Pancoast Nagamura.
image: provided by Kit Pancoast Nagamura
“We are looking for a place to pick apples,” “Be careful as my dog likes to jump on people,” “I have never felt so relaxed in my whole life,” and “Can we make a quick pit stop?” are just a few of the many useful sentences. This book gave me a chance to use idioms and colloquialisms in a language other than English in a natural and appropriate way. It also helped me recognise when that language was being spoken to me in this way too, increasing my understanding far beyond the typical classroom and text book language usage.
didn’t work in either language or that just didn’t make sense when they were translated were discarded. The nuance was the important thing for us, that is, the actual conveyed meaning of each phrase rather than just the literal, wordfor-word translation. This book includes a CD, tell me about that? I believe that the CD is an essential part of the book. Many people learn by ear and the voice recordings provide a real context for the phrases. The four voice actors really got into the job, which provides clear context clues and intonation help, and they recorded all the phrases in both languages over several days. The CD can be used as an mpeg for your digital audio devices as well. What are the steps involved from conception to completion of writing a book? Sell your blood and sign off on your social life [laughs]! But seriously, you have to be prepared at times to deconstruct what you worked so hard on constructing. If you are starting from scratch, you should compile a book proposal. First, write up a book description, add in a sample chapter, an essay on the book’s selling points, and why the book is unique and or better than others on the market, and do all this in an engaging and perfectly written way. Then, don’t freak if an editor wants to change, rewrite, or re-concept your work. It’s the editor who has to take the project and sell it to his company, so it has to be a viable proposal. Ultimately, as many as 20 people will have input into the final project, so you need to get used to BAB being flexible from the start. For more information or to order, visit www. amazon.co.jp or the publisher’s website at www.kodansha-intl.com/books/html/ en/9784770031006.html.
Just a few of the 1,800 phrases in the book. Being A Broad April 2010
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mothering
HAVING A BABY IN JAPAN by Helen Kaiho, co-ordinator for Tokyo Mothers Group and working mother of two young children
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image: provided by Noella Fujii.
ecoming a mother is possibly the greatest challenge a woman can face in her life. Rewarding, certainly. Daunting, undoubtedly. Messy, inevitably! The journey from the decision to start trying for a baby to the appearance of the blue line on a positive pregnancy test, through pregnancy, childbirth, and on to the day-to-day reality of looking after a demanding, albeit pretty darn cute newborn is a momentous one.Throw into the mix the fact that a new mum in Japan is miles from home, living in a country that is not her own, where she may or may not speak the language, and doesn’t have her support network of family, friends, or indeed her own mother to help her out, this challenge becomes an even greater adventure. The Tokyo New Mothers Group was created in 2006 by a woman named Allison in response to her own experience as a new mother in Tokyo, and as a way to keep in touch with other new mothers she met through the Tokyo Pregnancy Group. With the support of Yuki and Andrea, the first coordinators, membership grew to over 200. Tokyo Mother’s Group, or TMG as the group is now known, has a membership of over 675 and is growing all the time. It is the only Englishspeaking support and contact group for mothers in Tokyo. TMG is an English-speaking group, but the members are from every corner of the globe and all walks of life. Three of the group’s members have volunteered to share their stories about their personal journey into motherhood here in Tokyo. Each is at a different stage of motherhood. Noella Fujii, from France, is a new mother to a little girl Louka, born last December. Julia Sprules, a British woman married to an Italian, has a two-year-old toddler Charlize and is pregnant with her second child, due at the end of May. And finally, Nicky Washida, also from the UK, is a seasoned mother
Noella Fujii with daughter Louka.
Julia Sprules and her family. of three young children: Mia aged six, Kai aged three, and Jay aged four months. They tell us about the challenges they have faced, whether they be language difficulties, cultural differences, or just the fact that they are starting families so far from home. Nicky, who lives in Chuo-ku, reminisces about her first experience of giving birth here in Japan. “The first time was utterly terrifying! My Japanese wasn’t so good then and my husband, in true Japanese style, dumped me at the hospital in labour and went to the office (only to get an ass-kicking from his brand new American boss he was trying to impress “Japanese-style,” who sent him hot-footing it right back to the hospital to try and impress his by-then highly unimpressed mother in law). My doctor at that time was incredibly highskilled...but not the best in terms of bedside manners. In fact she was positively terrifying and reminded me of a Japanese Roseanne Barr! The single biggest thing for me was—as for most people—the lack of pain relief! It’s not that I necessarily wanted to be drugged up to the eyeballs (although it would have been nice) but more that, if things got too much (and this being my first I had no idea what to expect) there was nowhere for me to go—no back-up if the pain got too much—and that was scary. I had no idea of what I was doing. I hadn’t been to any classes, I had just read pregnancy books! But I gave in to it in the end and tried to relax and keep a sense of humour (which I promptly lost anyway when they dosed me with oxytocin). However, after eighteen hours of labour and two hours of pushing, my little girl was born, and all I can really remember from the birth is a euphoria no drugs could ever have given me, and huddling down in my bed when I was supposed to be sleeping it off, texting friends all over the world on my mobile to tell them the news! It felt a lot like it did after the first time I went skydiving....” Julia didn’t end up giving birth to her daughter here in Tokyo, as a crisis at home saw her flying back to the UK just weeks before her due date. She talks about her first time experience: “We moved to Japan from Frankfurt, Germany. My husband had already been transferred many months ahead of me in the spring and I was still finishing up my job in Germany, so didn’t join him until the heat of August, and Charlize was due in November. I had previously worked in Japan with my job in the airline Alliances department of ANA, so coming back this time as a soon-to-be mother and living in a predominantly expat area of Azubu Juban was very different and a bit strange. It was as if I wasn’t really in Japan; everyone spoke English, there were mainly foreign faces and high-end supermarkets selling imported products. I felt a bit
image: provided by Julia Sprules.
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ADVENTURES IN MOTHERHOOD;
lonely as the heat made it difficult to get out and about and I did my prenatal classes in Germany, so had not had a chance to meet other expectant mums. Even though I spoke Japanese reasonably fluently, I still had my moments of Japan-rage, especially trying to get booked into a hospital nearby, which at my late stage of pregnancy was very difficult. As it happened, I didn’t end up delivering in Japan as my mother fell critically ill in the UK, and so at 38 weeks I found myself back in the UK giving birth in a UK hospital courtesy of the good old NHS. There were 11 of us on the ward, but I couldn’t complain as the doctors and nurses were professional, I could have an epidural if I wanted, and unlike Japan we didn’t have to use our life savings to have a baby, as the whole thing was completely free. I flew back to Japan a month after Charlize was born.” Julia is now planning to give birth to her second child here in Tokyo at Aiku hospital in Minato-ku. Both Aiku and Seibo hospital are popular choices for English-speaking mothers as the doctors and staff there can speak English and are open-minded about the use of pain relief during labour! Noella gave birth at Seibo hospital and says, “The experience was very different from what I expected. The pregnancy visits were very short; we had to wait for about two hours for just five minutes with the OB/GYN! It made it very difficult to ask questions and for a first pregnancy, I had a lot of them. I am lucky that my sister is a student midwife so I could ask her things. I was also surprised by the manners of people travelling on the trains; the Japanese are known for their politeness, but this doesn’t apply to train seats! Even though you have a maternity badge
image: provided by Nicky Washida.
annoying and hard to deal with sometimes.” Nicky has encountered more than her fair share of well-meaning, meddling Japanese obachans in the past. “I got so tired of having all the old ladies in the supermarket tell me off for not wrapping my belly up warm when I was pregnant (in August in 35 degree heat), wearing heels (only three inches! They weren’t Louboutins for god’s sake), riding my bicycle (my back hurt when I walked), wearing a belt (better to let my pants fall down?), dressing indiscreetly (I’m sorry, but I have big boobs. There is nothing I can do about it. I refuse to stuff them into a tent to hide them!) etc., etc. Everyone seems to have an opinion on you and your baby— she’s cold, she’s tired, she shouldn’t be out in this weather (like, how do I get food then?)—and feels you are absolutely entitled to hear it.” Whether returning to work or not, when the time comes to find childcare, that opens another can of worms. As Julia tells us, “Finding quality but affordable pre-schooling for Charlize has been the biggest challenge. There are plenty of amazing international schools all around, but the cost of preschool here for just one year is equal to that of an entire university education back home; it’s quite frankly insane. The Japanese public hoikuen places are prioritised for working parents and in our area are really hard to get as they are so popular. I don’t have a language barrier to deal with, but I can see that those who who do might find the whole experience of applying to Japanese kindergartens very stressful. Moreover, I am not convinced they are totally the right environment for my daughter. I want to send Charlize to a preschool that is creative, fun, and structured, but the Japanese ones I visited didn’t really fulfil those requirements. In the end we had no choice but to opt for two days a week at international preschool. I and my family love Japan, but one of the reasons I don’t think we can make it our permanent home is the prohibitive cost of international schools here, especially now that I am expecting a second child.” Nicky has experience with both the Japanese hoikuen or nursery system and the youchien or kindergarten system. Her experience with hoikuen was very positive. She states, “I only have experience of one hoikuen in Japan—the same one in our area that I have been using for all our children (my youngest will be starting in a few months). As far as I am concerned, in the hierarchy of things, there is Buddha, then there’s God, up there jointly with the guy from Prison Break (obviously), and then at the top of the heap there is Encho-sensei! She is a living God and it is thanks to her and her amazing, dedicated team of teachers that I am (a) still married (b) still here and (c) still relatively sane. I am so impressed with daycare here. Wish I
mothering
Nicky Washida and her kids enjoying Halloween. and/or a big pregnant belly, most of the time people won’t budge or will pretend to be asleep when they see you coming. I took a birth class in the hospital with my husband, but it was very short and in Japanese so we made the choice to take one in English with Brett Iimura (CEC). This was great and I would recommend it to anyone who is having a baby in Japan. I also went to a La Leche League meeting since I made the choice to breastfeed, and this was really helpful too. My labour wasn’t long, only two and a half hours! Even though she didn’t speak much English, the midwife who took care of me was great. She had obviously read my birth plan and did her best to follow it. I was also glad my husband was with me, especially for communication. I speak some Japanese, but when you’re giving birth it’s hard to think properly.” And how about everyday life with a baby or children in Japan? What are the biggest problems mothers face? Metro stations without elevators or even escalators in some cases are a real problem, but on the other hand the baby-changing facilities or nursing rooms readily available in most department stores or shopping centres are clean and plentiful. As Julia says, “Toilet training is made easier with all the places receptive to you using their toilets; even the station toilets and 7-Eleven loos are passable. I would be happier, however, if the big toilets with the changing facilites were not always occupied by single women using them to change clothes and apply makeup!” Another thing a foreign mother most certainly has to get used to is the attention they inevitably draw when out and about with their little ones. You begin to feel very much like public property! As Nicky tells it, “Seeing a blonde mum walking down the street in a very Japanese area pushing a pram causes everyone to stop and get a look. I feel like a celebrity sometimes and I’ve done the baseball-cap-and-dark-glasses Britney thing when I scoot off to the shop with no makeup on. It’s nice that everyone is so interested—but please! I’ve been up all night and I just want a litre of milk—leave us alone! Of course, everyone talks about how kawaii the kids are, and how strong I must be being married to a Japanese (personally I think it is harder for him being married to a British girl, but that’s just my opinion) and that is always nice to hear, of course.” Noella, who lives in Toshima-ku, is also finding herself on the receiving end of some unwanted attention. “Something that has surprised me is that some old ladies want to look for a long time at and sometimes touch my daughter, even when she is sleeping. They also like to give advice, which isn’t always necessary or asked for. This can be
could say the same about kindergarten! I think the kindergartens themselves are quite good environments for the kids, depending of course on the school itself and the teachers. I was not at all prepared for the amount of work a mother is expected to perform as a kindergarten mum. In the first kindergarten we entered, I was the only foreign mum and the only working mum and it caused a lot of conflict, sometimes even open hostility. I wasn’t expecting that. I also found all the rules and regulations around kindergarten confusing and ridiculous, and, of course, the hours precluded any kind of meaningful work or career being pursued. I wanted my daughter to have kindergarten experience—and me too in a “don’t knock it ‘til you’ve tried it” kind of way— so I cut down my working hours and did my best. I would say that it is a great environment if you have plenty of free time and want to improve your Japanese. For working mums, I would stick to daycare until elementary school because it really is hard to balance kindergarten and work and you find yourself pulled in all directions and feeling guilty no matter what you do. Of course, I should point out here that this is one person’s experience of two kindergartens—we swapped in the end, and I found the new place to be much better and more flexible.” So, with all these obstacles in their paths and the challenges and problems they have had to overcome and are still encountering on a daily basis, how do our three moms sum up their lives now? Noella finds that life with her newborn is “exhausting but wonderful,” and Julia has her new arrival on her mind when she concludes, “life is good, but with no family here to turn to for support, and number two on the way, what were we thinking?” But perhaps Nicky sums up what it feels like to be a foreign mother living in Tokyo best of all with a simple BAB declaration: “Beam me up, Scottie!” Being A Broad April 2010
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feature
TAKING ON THE
TRAILWALKER by Dee Green
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Scenes from Trailwalker training. images provided by Dee Green
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ne of my favourite bands, The Hives, penned a song called Walk, Idiot, Walk, and Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: “nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.” If you combine the two, you’ll get a sense of what it’s going to be like participating in the life-changing challenge that is Oxfam’s Trailwalker Japan. Starting at 9am on April 23, our all-girl team of four, The Soundtracks—Remixed, along with almost 200 other teams, is preparing to drag itself over a gruelling 100 kilometre course from Odawara to Yamanako-ko. All for charity, all in the spirit of giving. It’s a 100-kilometre walk in the woods through FujiHakone-Izu National Park, over more than seven mountains, up and over the Yozoku Pass, past Mt Fuji, and all in under 48 hours. You walk it together, day and night. We plan to dance and giggle most of the way. Our goal is 40 hours...hmmm...we’ll see. This will be our second attempt at Trailwalker Japan. And we can’t wait. Following last year’s epic turnout, guiding our blind member over the course, and the resulting blistering mess, we are back for more. We’re ready for another 100 kilometres of hilarity as old and new members collide, with all-new playlists on our iPods. The 2010 international lineup includes Trace (fresh from her Tokyo Marathoning debacle [see page 11 for details], at least this time she can use the great outdoors for a toilet), Nat (coming from Australia again just for the event), Erin (first-time Trailwalker, Canadian, packs the best treats ever), and me (team leader by junken). Plus the greatest support team in the world, Emma and Marnie, who have the delightful job of dealing with our tantrums from start to finish. We had to be called The Soundtracks. We all know that in life you’ve got to have one. A soundtrack, that is. Whether yours is punk inspired, emo, rocking out, a bit of Richard Clayderman or Dolly Parton, dodgy top 40, or the music from Fame all wrapped in legwarmers, you’ve just got to move with music in your soul and some funky dance moves in your life. It will not be pretty. We’re a little bit high maintenance. We’re still figuring out what to wear and what to consume. At last count we’re having a barbecue every checkpoint. Then there’s all our stuff. Just how we’ll hurl it all and ourselves over those hills remains a mystery. But it’s the physical and mental challenge that gets you in and changes you. It’s the team aspect and working towards doing something seemingly impossible. Walking 100 kilometres. Together. And it’s an incredible way to see Japan. Leaving the city bustle behind, the course is a constant surprise. It is hard and tough and steep, mostly, but the views when visible are breathtaking. It’s a combined total ascent of a staggering 5,460
metres. That’s almost nine Tokyo Sky Trees when it’s finally finished. There are quiet moments spent following meandering streams, walking on forestry roads, or ending up trotting through some local farmer’s veggie patch. Picking up the pace around the lakeside trail is a welcome respite from the torturous upward slogs, but there is always a payoff. Fuji is always there. It’s nice walking with an icon. Burst through the woods and you find yourself in the greenest of tea fields or in an avenue of wild blossoms. We’ve experienced warm hospitality and encouragement from local villagers and residents who often cheer and clap us on our way. Meeting fellow Trailwalkers randomly while on the course and sharing experiences has been a pleasure, as has explaining what we are doing to the many Japanese hikers we meet. The allure of Trailwalker Japan is, in part, the charm of the unexpected and the chance to experience a different kind of backcountry while testing your own limits. We’ve been out on the course getting lost and loving it since January this year in the snow, rain, fog, and mud. Emma has lost her pants, my hot and cold flushes are becoming worrisome, Trace’s checkpoint celebratory leaps are legendary, and Erin’s Pointer Sisters trail moves are inspiring. We plan to finish the entire course in training before we rock up to the start line. Preparation is key. There are nine checkpoints from start to finish, all at varying lengths, and manned by some 700 enthusiastic local volunteers during the actual event. The longest stage is 18 kilometres and the shortest is 5.5 kilometres. Working out our team dynamics, our strengths, and our weaknesses has been important and has bought us much closer together. This has generally occurred in cafés all over Tokyo and we’ve loved every minute of it. From our training we’ve learnt as much about what we need and don’t need to bring as we’ve learned about each other. We don’t need 25 kilos of food each and bear bells; some spare socks, plastic bags to prevent leakage, and rain spats to keep our
legs dry would be better. And we have to layer clothing whether we want to or not. After knocking off almost every section we still haven’t run out of things to talk about. Our training sessions have become mandatory weekend getaways, complete with the now standard onsen at the end of each day and the tasting of regional delicacies. Mainly soft creams. Trace was much dismayed that the potato chip soft cream on the menu at the Soft Burendo Shop was sold out following our last training session. We’ve promised her one when we finish. When we’re not out causing chaos on the course, taking photos and creating our own How To Trailwalking instructional videos, we’re going about daily training with runs, walks, and weights. Yoga was suggested; the results have been amusing. We’d recommend this fabulous experience to all broads. It’s not all about us. It’s about Oxfam and its ongoing commitment to overcoming poverty and injustice for those less fortunate than ourselves in some of the poorest communities in the world. Oxfam’s Trailwalker is a growing global phenomenon, now with events all over the world (13 trails in 11 countries in 2010). Each team has a minimum donation requirement. But through teamwork, fundraising has been a breeze and our ¥120,000 target has been easily met thanks to many generous donations from family, friends, and colleagues. Why not sponsor a team? No amount is too big or too small. All donations are tremendously appreciated. Be a part of something life-changing. So with the words of Lao Tzu ringing in our ears, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step,” we embark upon our journey of 100 kilometres with disco shoes on our feet and music in our hearts. We will climb every mountain. BAB For more info about The Soundtracks, visit their blog at http://offtheplanet.typepad.com/ the_soundtracks_09_twj, and for more info about the event, please visit the Trailwalker Japan 2010 site: www.trailwalker.jp.
ON EXCHANGE by Rachel Hashimoto
Rachel and Yasu-kun at the Grand Canyon during a break from school in the States.
All images provided by Rachel Hashimoto.
Rachel and Yasu-kun at school in Tokyo.
H
e caught my attention immediately. I had never been attracted to an Asian person before, but his shy smile nearly knocked me off my feet. A million other things were running through my mind as I walked into the welcome party for the new international students at the college I would be attending in the coming semester. I was catching up with some old friends when I noticed this welldressed, good-looking, calmly collected young man standing near us. I thought it was adorable the way he so casually entered our conversation. We spent
confidant. I turned to him when I needed help. He helped me purchase tickets from the convenience store and send a package at the post office. Yasukun was always there for me when I just needed someone to talk to. He offered encouragement, advice, and most of all hope. Through this shift in my situation, I knew he was the type of person I wanted to have in my life as more than a friend. I have never been the type of person to keep my feelings in, so I didn’t know how long it would before I confessed my feelings. One day, I
said, “I have a crush on you.” Due to the cultural context of the expression, Yasu-kun thought I Iphysically wanted to crush him. most of the party getting to know each other, but I knew I was only going to be in Japan for less than four months and my cultural and linguistical understanding of Japanese would make it impossible for anything to develop beyond a friendship. So I shoved all initial attraction aside and decided that if I became good friends with him—Yasu-kun—I would be happy. And good friends we became. We started meeting for lunch and doing homework together after classes were finished. Many times other friends would join in, but most of the time it was just the two of us hanging out. Just as I predicted from the first day, Yasu-kun was quiet and shy. I quickly saw the difference in our cultures just by the way we talked with each other. I was always trying to pull more out of him while trying to share more of myself. Yasu-kun quietly listened to my extensive stories and politely responded to my random questions. He was always patient and caring—I couldn’t believe I had made such a good friend in such a short time. My feelings for Yasu-kun became more serious as my situation at home [living with an aunt and uncle I hadn’t known well before coming to Japan] turned sour. I never wanted to go home because of a grudge my aunt began holding against me, so Yasu-kun quickly became a support system and
texted Yasu-kun to see if he wanted to hang out. He walked all the back from the train station to hang out with me. However, I had a meeting that evening, too, and he ended up waiting for my meeting to be done so that we could do homework together. I thought that he had to have feelings for me to do such a thing. Well, Yasu-kun and I had a routine of walking together to the station closest to our university almost every evening. So that evening on our way to the station, I said, “I have a crush on you.” Due to the cultural context of the expression, Yasu-kun thought I physically wanted to crush him. It was so hard for me to confess my feelings the first time, but then I had to do it again! He finally understood what I was trying to say, and told me he liked me too. I couldn’t believe it! That weekend we went on our first date and he asked me to be his girlfriend; I accepted. Yasukun changed so much after that. Even though he is shy, he was very attentive to me. He always held my hand, made sure that he was walking on the side of the road, and pulled me closer if there were suspicious-looking people around. We only had about a month together in Japan, and we knew this time would fly by, so we made the most of it. Simply put, Yasu-kun made my dreams come true. He travelled with me to places he knew I wanted to go, he supported me
through everything, and he opened up his life to me as well. I learned so much about him in that short amount of time. We allowed ourselves to be young and playful—and in love. The bustling city seemed so peaceful and right when we were together. Although we struggled to understand each other completely, we never gave up. In the beginning of August, Yasu-kun left for California to study as an international student for a year. I returned to America soon after him, but my home is in Michigan. We knew the distance would be hard, not only because we were far, but also because the only form of communication we could use was verbal, which was a weakness for us. It was also hard for me because I wanted to support Yasu-kun in all his trials in adjusting to America just as he was my support in Japan, but I was too far away. It was through this difference that we really started to see the depth of our cultural differences. My inability to be patient and my need for explanations and answers did not mesh well with his lack of interest in expressing his personal feelings. We loved each other, but we began to wonder if that was enough. The stress from classes, housing situations, future, and finances didn’t help the situation either. How could a relationship that seemed so clear before become so murky? We both realise that this distance part of our relationship will be the hardest time. In June, Yasu-kun will return to Tokyo to finish his last semester in college, and I will, hopefully, be moving to Yokohama to begin teaching English in August. We have been able to visit each other during our school breaks in America, which has been a needed reminder of why we keep persisting through the hard times. We are also aware that the circumstances will change once we are both back in Japan—we will not have the same relationship we had last summer—but I am confident that we have grown together so much already, going back to the place where our love BAB began will only make it stronger. Being A Broad April 2010
she found love in Japan
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