March 2021

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MARCH 2021 | ADAR • NISSAN 5781

The

Passover Issue


An Award-Winning Realtor Who Lives and Breathes San Diego Real Estate Bringing a Superior Level of Service

Whether you’re looking to upgrade to a beachfront home in La Jolla or seeking to sell your modern condo in North Park, Joel Blumenfeld has you covered. The native San Diegan and Blumenfeld Group founder leverages his wealth of first-hand knowledge and his real estate expertise to help clients achieve their goals. “I know the city very well, and I love it here,” he says. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else or do anything different than working in real estate here. I have a passion for it.” BHHS Chairman’s Circle Diamond and Legend Award Recipient RISMedia Magazine

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Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

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4  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021


Lawrence Family Lawrence Family Jewish Community Center Jewish Community Center JACOBS FAMILY CAMPUS JACOBS FAMILY CAMPUS 4126 Executive Drive, La Jolla

SUMMER LOVE IT’LL BE HERE BEFORE YOU KNOW IT!

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For Camp Jaycee 2021, we are planning to take all the COVID-19 safety precautions we implemented last summer and are keeping abreast of developments. We will alter the policies and programs if/when it is safe to do so.

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LOVING EXCITED RELAXED PEACEFUL NURTURING and SAFE

SA

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Find preschool COVID-19 Modification information at lfjcc.org/preschool Gary & Jerri-Ann Jacobs Youth Endowment Fund Harry & Jeanette Weinberg Endowment Fund

Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

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Contents MARCH 2021 | ADAR • NISSAN 5781 | PASSOVER ISSUE

PUBLISHERS

Mark Edelstein and Dr. Mark Moss EDITOR-IN- CHIEF

Jacqueline Bull ASSISTANT EDITOR

Nathalie Feingold ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR

FE AT U R ES

Eileen Sondak CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Donna D’Angelo

34 Filling in the Gaps

OFFICE MANAGER

Jonathan Ableson SENIOR CONSULTANT

Passover

Ronnie Weisberg CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

24 Community Seder Listings

Emily Bartell, Linda Bennett, Leorah Gavidor, Emily Gould, Judith Fein (Senior Travel Correspondent), Paul Ross (Senior Travel Photographer), Patricia Goldblatt, Pat Launer, Sharon Rosen Leib, Andrea Simantov, Marnie Macauley, Rabbi Jacob Rupp, Saul Levine, Rachael Eden, Sybil Kaplan.

30 Reclaiming Memories of Passover 32 A Covid Passover 2.0 36 How Will They Tell the Story 38 A Box of Chocolates and a Motorcycle Ride

ADVERTISING REPRESENTATIVES

Jonathan Ableson | Senior Account Executive Alan Moss | Palm Springs EDITORIAL

editor@sdjewishjournal.com

C O L U M NS

ADVERTISING

marke@sdjewishjournal.com

10  From the Editor | Lessons in San Diego Geography 14  Personal Development and Judaism | 16  Israeli Lifestyle

| Shaking Off the Cobwebs

Resilience Revisited: Personal Courage, Nurtured by Others

20  Examined Life |

Back to the Future

44  Advice | New Plagues for Passover 2021

I N E V ERY I S S U E 12  Our Town 40  Online Offerings 42  The News 47  Food | Tropical Matzo Granola

CIRCULATION & SUBSCRIPTIONS

jableson@sdjewishjournal.com ART DEPARTMENT

art@sdjewishjournal.com LISTINGS & CALENDAR

assistant@sdjewishjournal.com SDJJ is published monthly by San Diego Jewish Journal, LLC. Subscription rate is $24 for one year (12 issues). Send subscription requests to SDJJ, 7742 Herschel Ave., Suite H, La Jolla, CA 92037. The San Diego Jewish Journal is a free and open forum for the expression of opinions. The opinions expressed herein are solely the opinion of the author and in no way reflect the opinions of the publishers, staff or advertisers. The San Diego Jewish Journal is not responsible for the accuracy of any and all information within advertisements. The San Diego Jewish Journal reserves the right to edit all submitted materials, including press releases, letters to the editor, articles and calendar listings for brevity and clarity. The Journal is not legally responsible for the accuracy of calendar or directory listings, nor is it responsible for possible postponements, cancellations or changes in venue. Manuscripts, letters, documents and photographs sent to the Journal become the physical property of the publication, which is not responsible for the return or loss of such material. All contents ©2021 by San Diego Jewish Journal. The San Diego Jewish Journal is a member of the American Jewish Press Association and the Jewish Telegraphic Agency.

San Diego Jewish Journal (858) 638-9818 | fax: (858) 263-4310 7742 Herschel Ave., Suite H, La Jolla, CA 92037   #SDJewishJournal

SanDiegoJewishJournal

sdjewishjournal.com

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Dor L'Dor

FROM GENERATION TO GENERATION

Join us as we remember the victims of the Holocaust, honor its survivors and teach future generations of the San Diego Jewish community

1945 • 76

YEARS • 2021

Community Holocaust Commemoration Wednesday, April 7 – Sunday, April 11, 2021 This virtual commemoration is free and open to the public

To register and learn more, please visit:

jewishinsandiego.org/yomhoashoah

jewishinsandiego.org 858-571-3444 In partnership with: Anti-Defamation League • IAC San Diego — Israeli American Council • Jewish Community Foundation Jewish Family Service of San Diego • Lawrence Family JCC • New Life Club • San Diego Generations of the Shoah San Diego Rabbinic Association • Seacrest Village Retirement Communities • The Butterfly Project


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Passover...a time for sharing. The closeness of family and friends gathered together in thankful celebration. A special feeling. A special warmth. A time for sharing, when age-old traditions proudly grace the seder table. Wondrously alive and vital.

Best wishes from all of us at Passover. Sandy Roseman, Richard Prager and Families, and the Law Offices of Charles S. Roseman and Associates Providing quality legal representation throughout California for over 49 years

• Personal Injury • Product Liability • Medical Malpractice • ADA/Injury Law • Insurance/Injury Law • Civil Rights/Injury Law • Discrimination Law • Elder Abuse/Injury Law • Mediation/Arbitration Services

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The JFS Behavioral Health Committee Presents

MAKING IT WORK: LIFE LESSONS FROM GLOBAL FASHION ICON TIM GUNN THE VIRTUAL EVENT OF THE YEAR Thursday, April 29, 2021

12:00– 1:00pm • VIP Meet-And-Greet Follows

HONORING

Caryl Lees Witte

Linda Janon Behavioral Health Champion Award

Nathan Fletcher, Supervisor of San Diego’s Fourth District Behavioral Health Hero Award

Tim Gunn Photo credit: Scott McDermott

Many of our neighbors are struggling with behavioral health issues that have only been magnified by the COVID-19 pandemic. Now, more than ever, it is important that we take the time to listen, identify, and take part in conversations addressing behavioral health. Join us for a candid conversation with style guru, Tim Gunn. Best known as the fashion mentor on Project Runway and Making the Cut, Tim will detail how he overcame his behavioral health struggles and share his everyday lessons for “Making it Work”.

Tickets & Underwriting: www.jfssd.org/TimGunn Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

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From the Editor JACQUELINE BULL

Lessons in San Diego Geography A Sunday not too long ago, I was making my trek from downtown to Hillcrest. I take the 6th Avenue hill all the way up to University, hugging the west edge of Balboa Park. I like this route; I know it very well. I walk by outdoor yoga, runners, dog walkers, even an earnest flute player on occasion. My errands in Hillcrest took me further east and instead of retracing my steps, I decided to do something that I understood in theory from my devoted practice of pouring over San Diego maps, but had never tried. I decided to head back downtown by intercepting the park. This route brought me through a neighborhood I hadn’t seen before and showed me trails that run through the park like veins. For me, one of the most iconic images of San Diego is how the 163 weaves through Balboa Park like a canyon river under the Cabrillo bridge before it empties out into 10th Avenue and you are immediately in the city. Perhaps I’m biased because this was an image I saw everyday coming back from work, but this image feels more specific than say the airport along the marina (vistas of airports in coastal cities look the same to me), or the concrete high-rises (dead ringer for Vancouver), or so many truly beautiful views that could be anywhere in SoCal. (What do you think is the most iconic vista in San Diego?) Sitting in traffic, I’ve searched to find all the colors of the ice plant blossoms or endeavored to be able to identify all the apartment buildings and hotels in the skyline by shape and position. Anyway, this image of the highway nestled at the bottom of the slope of the park is etched into my mind. When I see it, I know that I’m close to home. On this Sunday, when I was walking these park trails for the first time, I was suddenly on a trail that ran parallel to the highway and I was able to stand underneath and stare up

10  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

at the bridge that I have driven under hundreds of times. The trail led all the way up the hill and connected with the bridge. This was exhilarating and jarring at the same time. Discovering a different vantage point from a hugely familiar image was like finding a secret passageway in your childhood home. I have a slight obsession with geography now, but I used to be hopeless. When I was living and driving in Michigan, I was notorious for getting lost outside of the about three routes that I knew. My freshman year of college, I relied on my paper campus map for weeks into classes. (The campus was only about a mile long). Something changed for me when I moved to San Diego. I think the grid system downtown with alphabetical streets running west to east and the numericals running north to south helped. Maybe moving out West made me into an explorer. COVID has meant that I’ve been held to whatever distance I can manage on foot, so I’ve mostly been in one 4-mile radius for a year now. The upside to this is that I know just about every nook and cranny in my purview — “just about” being the key phrase. Pre-COVID even if I was making my routes downtown every week, I couldn’t keep up with what restaurant was opening or closing, or what had finished or started construction. And now, even if I’m not deliberately seeking out a new trail, I see something new. This state of exploration lends me a sense of vibrancy — the two‑fold of knowing and discovering. A



Our Town BY LINDA BENNETT AND EMILY BARTELL

Congratulations to our own San Diegan, Cindy Marten on her appointment as Deputy Secretary of Education in President Biden’s administration. Daughter of Fern Siegel, Ms. Marten was the Superintendent of Public Education for the San Diego Unified School District. Continuing their family tradition of hospitality, celebrity Chef and Restauranteur, Byron Lazaroff-Puck shared some Hanukkah recipes exclusively with the American Friends of Hebrew University (AFHU) Western Region during their virtual “Light Up the Night” Hanukkah Celebration.

Mazel Tov! Mazel Tov to Sara Gilman-Gregory & Len Gregory on their marriage! Married (virtually) on Dec. 26 by Cantor Sheldon Merel. Cantor Merel officiated Len’s Bar Mitzvah 57 years ago in Oakland. Mazel Tov to Ellen Goren and Richard Greyson on the marriage of daughter, Laurel to Steve Smith, on Dec. 31. Mazel Tov to, Laurie & Mark Spiegler on the engagement of both of their sons Michael Spiegler to Jessica Butler of New York, and Scott Spiegler to Guy Bloemlargen. Mazel Tov to Matt & Barbara Meis on the birth of their first grandchild Mila Rosa Verne. Mila’s parents are Rachel Meis & Alex Verne. Mazel Tov to Lisa & Ron Oberndorfer on the birth of their newest grandchild Adeline Cap. Adeline is the first child of Tyson Oberndorfer & Lis Cap. Mazel Tov to Melissa & Jeffrey Galper on the birth of their son Asher Wulf, born on Nov. 29, in Washington state. Older sibling, Auri (4 yrs) is incredibly excited to welcome him to the family. Happy grandfather is Louis Galper.

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Yom   Huledets Sameach to... Ilene Silvers celebrating her 84th birthday Arnold Saltzman celebrating her 84th birthday. Amnon Ben Yehuda celebrating her 91st birthday. Trina Kaplan celebrating her 93rd birthday. (She still walks 1.5 miles every day)

CELEBRATING

Wedding Anniversaries with infinite love & happiness, Mazel Tov to… Sarah & Thomas Karp, 50 years. Michaele & Sanford Shapiro, 50 years. Janet & Harry Zanville, 50 years. Karen & Warren Kessler, 51 years. Berdele & Richard Katz, 51 years. Barbara & Mark Guss, 51 years. Sheryl & David Baron, 51 years. Dale & Gerald Spector, 52 years. Bobbie & Jon Gilbert, 54 years. Anne & Rodney Shapiro, 55 years. Marcia & Donald Wolochow, 57 years. Florence & Anthony Riesner, 58 years. Susan & George Kaplan, 59 years. Barbara & Sheldon Krueger, 60 years. Anne & Herbert Arnold, 64 years. Barbara & Mathew Loonin, 64 years. Francis & Joel Heffler, 65 years. Iris & Matthew Strauss, 66 years.


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Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

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PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT AND JUDAISM

THIS WAY TO EDEN by Rachel Eden

| rachel.s.eden@gmail.com

Back To The Future The past often holds us captive, doesn’t it? Most of us still feel frustrated by hurtful words spoken ages ago or what we didn’t say or do but wish we had. Our selfesteem is often hinged on past attitudes, choices, experiences and beliefs. In fact, many individuals (and institutions and businesses) attempt to bargain with the past when deliberating about the future. If I was capable of X last year, I should be capable of X this year (and with some luck, anticipate a slight improvement). It’s easy to see how incremental growth can come from measuring and evaluating the past. The trouble is, incremental growth precludes exponential growth. Dynamite or TNT (trinitrotoluene) was invented by Swedish engineer and chemist Alfred Nobel. His name was made famous by his initiative where the five Nobel Prizes are awarded each year to those who have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind. The story behind the prizes is lesser known and highly relevant to our discussion. Alfred Nobel’s brother, Ludvig, died in 1888 and through journalistic error, it was reported that Alfred was the one who passed away. Alfred’s obituary was published the following day with a headline: ‘The Merchant of Death is Dead’. Stunned by his would-be legacy, Alfred chose to create a new story for his death. One year before he died, in 1896, Alfred Nobel signed off the majority of his vast estate to establish the five Nobel prizes, including one that awarded the pursuit of peace. Incremental growth is established from negotiating with the past while exponential growth is made from creating a desired future. The bigger an individual can dream, the better the dreamer. Martin 14  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

Luther King Jr. said, “I’ve been to the mountaintop...and I’ve looked over. And I’ve seen the promised land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight that we, as a people, will get to the promised land.” A long-term vision is highly valuable even without the benefit of longevity. For example, a 25-year-vision, established whether you’re 19 or 99, is a significant enough timeline to establish a lofty dream. Even if you don’t live to see your version of the finish line, reaching for the stars is an enviable inheritance as a value and practice. The beauty of the 25-year-vision is that self-assessment becomes both exciting and without unhelpful pressure. After all, if you reflect on your progress every quarter, any setbacks you experience only make up 1% of the vision. Each 90 days becomes their own gift of earnings and learnings. While human beings can’t control the timeline, we can control the vision. Our success is hinged on our belief and tenacity that we will reach our desired destination. The Torah writes that Abraham was commanded by G-d to “go for yourself ” and commentaries elaborate that going forward entailed leaving everything Abraham knew behind. His family, friends, culture and community all were abandoned for a new, unfamiliar destiny. Abraham was a failure to his father and nation so his ability to desert this identity and build anew was critical. Abraham’s courage at this pivotal moment shaped his legacy as the father of monotheism and the predecessor to the world’s most prominent religions of today. In fact, every great leader can point to at least one pivot from what was done or expected

based on the past in favor of creating an entirely unprecedented future. Surely Abraham felt some kind of fear in moving toward the unfamiliar, but without fear, there is no courage and without courage there is no exponential growth. Oprah Winfrey turned her back on a childhood of abandonment and abuse to create her future of becoming one of the most successful, influential and impactful individuals in the world today. Elon Musk described his father as evil and he was beaten so badly in school, he was hospitalized more than once. Today, he is at the cutting edge of science and technology, has advanced artificial intelligence, space transport and sustainable energy, as well as generated a net worth of $190 billion. Even highly successful individuals who don’t come from conventionally traumatic backgrounds still must exercise their ability to see an inspired, unfamiliar future. Everyone must unshackle themselves from their own past. As a coach, I see people rooted in the life that brought them to where they are today. Our default method of navigating a path is to examine the past. Anyone can be moderately successful using a default lens, but higher-level opportunities and possibilities are only available to those who see at a higher level. The best way to break through to amplify and accelerate purpose is to consider the future. Then, the future doesn’t become a to-do list, but rather a powerful springboard to create intent for living each day. The best way to create the life you want isn’t to go back to the past, but rather back to the future. A


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Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

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ISRAELI LIFESTYLE

LIVING ON THE FRONT PAGE by Andrea Simantov  |

andreasimantov@gmail.com

Shaking Off the Cobwebs “ And the cobwebs of time would surrender, dormant, so that the rainbows of new eras can emerge.” — NEMA AL-ARABY And just like that, it was over. Today, at least. It didn’t mean that if the numbers again skyrocketed, we wouldn’t be sent into the by-now-familiar national lockdown but, for the moment, businesses raised their shutters and sleepy Bed & Breakfast establishments rapidly aired out the rooms and changed the linens. Restaurants began providing pick-up service in place of door-drop deliveries and suddenly I began dodging joggers while walking the dog. Israel, it seems, was back. On the Shabbos morning before seger/ lockdown was officially ended, I said to the husband, ‘I don’t feel ready to work.’ Channeling an obscure character in a Harold Pinter drama, I added, ‘I’m scared.’ He didn’t ask why because he understood. Secluded had been our new reality and I’d protected that. Our home had been a fortress and although I read the news less and less, it wasn’t a secret that the longer the pandemic lasted, we discovered personal connections to those who had been afflicted or succumbed. And so what had begun as an “alienexperience” — isolating from community and family — became a near-comforting 16  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

norm. Just the thought of leaving the house felt aberrant. Like me, most of my clients expressed gratitude to Israel’s rapid inoculation program; for once we graced the front pages of the international press with tales of success, brilliance and quality leadership in lieu of smarmy politics and other wearisome crimes. “Rah, Rah, We Are #1! Hey!” It felt unfamiliar and good. Purim was subdued and I must confess that I wasn’t ready to regale guests with food, drink and song. Like last year, I observed the mitzvah of listening to Megilat Esther — the Book of Esther — via Zoom; unlike last year, this time I felt no guilt. Remember Dorothy Gale emerging from her tornado-tossed home in the miraculous Land of Oz? I’m still emerging from a fragile, terror-laced cocoon called Home that has provided shelter and safety for this past year.

My short term desires are not lofty; I want to walk along the seashore of Ashkelon. I’d like to visit the Kineret and camp out with the grandchildren, teaching them how to build a bonfire with one match. I yearn to meander through the Israel Museum and re-visit the glorious impressionist exhibits, as well as meditate in the majestic, disassembled and reassembled ancient synagogues. I’d like to buy place-mats and Mason jars at IKEA. continued on next page


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Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

17


As Passover approaches, I cannot help but juxtapose this slow, most gentle ‘emerging’ with the manner in which we were vomited out of Egypt. While there are stark historical differences, nevertheless, the intersectionality is startling. In both cases, we had grown comfortable. In both cases, we were uncertain of what the future might hold. In both cases, there are some who roll with the punches, prosper, grow and make lemonade out of lemons while there are always some who choose to ignore the challenges of ‘new-think’, change and personal reinvention. Both in Egypt and a (post?) pandemic world, there are those who lazily sink into despair while others bravely and even defiantly against the odds choose to count blessings, grasp emancipation and humbly await the dawns of still unrealized tomorrows. Overseas air travel had been a regular part of my PC (Pre‑COVID) life but the iffiness of such activity still sits in abeyance. Am I in a funk over this? Sometimes, when I let my guard down and play the Only Human card. Most of the time, however, I don’t go there because staying upbeat takes vigilance. Stay out of my way, boys and girls, because I won’t be dissuaded from the tingling belief that beyond these four walls — both figurative and real — sits a brave new world which waits for those of us who proudly wear badges of chutzpah, faith and humor as we excitedly await all that lies ahead. Chag Pesach kasher v’samayach! A happy and healthy Passover to all! A

PASSOVER

@ BETH ISRAEL Virtual Congregational Second Night Seder Sunday, March 28 @ 6:00 pm Join the Beth Israel clergy for a virtual second night seder.

No fee, RSVP at: https://cbisd.org/programs/seder2021 For more information on other Passover programs, visit www.cbisd.org

BETH ISRAEL 9001 Towne Centre Drive San Diego, CA 92122

18  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

Obituary

RUTH PAPERNY LUTTBEG Ruth was born May 30, 1924 in Omaha. She left us peacefully at age 96. She was predeceased by her parents Louis Paperny and Ida Wolfson Paperny, her three sisters and brothers-in-law, as well as three nephews. She is survived by her children Steven Luttbeg (Linda); Laurie Luttbeg Spiegler (Mark) of San Diego; grandchildren David Luttbeg (Miriam) of San Diego; Lisa Luttbeg de Jong (Jared) of Orange County; Mike Spiegler (Jessica Butler) of Brooklyn; Scott Spiegler and (Guy Bloembergen) of Brooklyn; the last living of her generation, her beloved sister-in-law Barbara Luttbeg Rubin of Los Angeles; two lucky enough to call her “GG,” great-grandchildren Hannah and Lilah de Jong of Orange County; and a multitude of nieces and nephews, grand nieces and nephews, and great-grand nieces and nephews. Ruth was a woman who gave love freely and unconditionally. She lived her life by the Golden Rule and love was her anthem. Her home a safe harbor for all her children’s friends, all welcome, full of good humor, empathy and most of all love. Her memory will be a blessing to all she loved and who loved her “a bushel and a peck.” The Family suggests memorials to: Welcome Home at the San Diego Jewish Community Foundation • Crawford High School Academy of Law Foundation


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Adar – Nissan 5781

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EXAMINED LIFE

OUR EMOTIONAL FOOTPRINT by Saul Levine, M.D., Professor Emeritus in Psychiatry at UCSD | slevine@ucsd.edu

Resilience Revisited: Personal Courage, Nurtured by Others “We Shall Overcome!” These stirring words of hope and resilience spoken by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. still ring true in speeches and song today. As you know, the term ‘Resilience’ refers to the ability to overcome significant adversities which may occur in one’s life. You yourself may have suffered early life difficulties, or experienced painful setbacks, losses or traumas during your lifetime. If so, the fact that you are reading this indicates that you’ve overcome challenges and are resilient. I first learned of resilience through my father’s life: He grew up with poverty and anti-Semitism in a shtetl in Europe, faced similar hatred as a young immigrant, yet became a hard-working, responsible husband, father and citizen, who cared deeply about people and all things cultural. Another spur to my early interests was the autobiography “Manchild in the Promised Land” in which an AfricanAmerican man, Claude Brown, described his violent early life on the “mean streets” and in jails, culminating in his career as a lawyer, author and teacher. Many other people I have since met have shown their resilience to be singularly important in their lives. We have all suffered circumstances which brought sadness or despair and yet 20  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

we’ve somehow managed to recover our health and vitality after these crises. We have the capability of rebounding from adversity, of coming back to our ‘steady state’ or even stronger. There is a natural physiological process of recovery in our bodies called “homeostasis” which is the innate propensity of cells to return to a state of equilibrium after having been chemically or virally disturbed. This same process of ‘returning to stable balance’ applies to our personalities and moods: We usually recover from dire personal events and painful aftermaths and return to inner states of equilibrium, sometimes stronger for the experience. In the yin and yang question of whether adversities hurt us or spur us to overcome, there are countervailing thoughts: 1. Research has shown that severe Adverse Childhood Experiences (“ACE”)– abuse, deprivation, abandonment, severe illness, or poor education–can lead to serious consequences in physical and mental health in later life. Similarly, traumatic events in adulthood can cause stress-related emotional and physical disorders. 2. We learn from other studies, however, that permanent scarring is not an inevitable aftermath of trauma. When

we study the victims of early or recent emotionally traumatic events, we learn that many manage to overcome terrible suffering and go on to lead fulfilling, productive and generative lives. In a word, they exhibit Resilience. I have been fortunate to know and work with many estimable people who faced severe challenges, overcame them and ultimately flourished. I keep a private “Pantheon of ‘Resilients’” with the names and stories of these inspiring individuals. Here are a few examples: The gifted high school senior, accepted on scholarship to Ivy League college, severely injured by a drunk driver, spent three years in neurosurgical and rehabilitation centers, was inpatient psychiatry for severe OCD and depression, now married to a musician… The physically-challenged since birth girl, was told by doctors she’d never have children and by teachers to forget about higher education, now a thriving professional, married with children… The orphaned holocaust survivor, arrived here uneducated and penniless, now a productive, caring family man… The young girl who was raped and kidnapped, suffered from PTSD, now a married vocational counsellor… continued on next page


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The boy raised in the barrio with armed gangs, heavy drug use, imprisoned twice, returned to high school, then college and grad school, geologist, now a caring grandfather… The child in World War Two, witnessed the murders at home of both parents by soldiers, ran away and lived in a forest for two years, now a successful businessman with a family… The young family with five children, escaped from Vietnam at war’s end, placed in a refugee camp for two years, then emigrated here, all the children graduated from college… I could go on. I see these estimable individuals as “thrivers” as opposed to survivors and I deeply admire their courageous ‘heroism,’ but they don’t see themselves as heroes, as they are humble and deeply appreciative for their remarkable life trajectories. Americans love comeback stories of heroic protagonists who overcome

fears and obstacles, the “rugged individualism”of those who rebound from calamity. These make compelling narratives, but my studies of people who overcame overwhelming challenges find they often had crucial help and that resilience does not “just happen” in a vacuum: Those who made dramatic comebacks from despair or degradation and rose to secure and fulfilling lives, received some meaningful support from at least one other person who played a key role in their recovery and renewal. I use the metaphor of “the Arm” to represent generous reaching out or “hugging” someone in need. The arm symbolizes caring and can be a virtual or real arm around the shoulder, but it also involves listening, or advising, teaching, supporting, encouraging, even cajoling or confronting. Perhaps you benefitted from a real or virtual “arm” extended to you by someone years ago, words of wisdom imparted to you or the influence of someone

who cared for you. That person’s real or metaphoric “touch” may have stayed with you as a touchstone throughout your life. The philosopher John Donne profoundly said, “No Man is an Island.” We are social beings, members of communities and we need one another in good and hard times. Individuals need and benefit from each other’s arms, nurturance and generosity. The profound folk concepts of the African-American “Kumbaya” or Zulu “Ubuntu” both stress community and compassion of humanity, although they are occasionally derided by cynics as naïve. Extending the arm to another reflects an implicit social contact, which is crucial in fostering resilience. Individual resilience at its core bespeaks a meaningful, helpful community: By being helpful to others, we enhance our own lives as well. A

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PASSOVER

Community Seders COMPILED BY NATHALIE FEINGOLD

CHABAD Chabad Center of University City* 3813 Governor Drive San Diego, CA, 92122 (858) 455-1670 chabaduc.org Chabad Jewish Center of Rancho Santa Fe* 5690 Cancha De Golf Rancho Santa Fe, CA 92091 (858) 756-7571 jewishrsf.com

Chabad of East County* 7290 Navajo Road, Suite 207 San Diego, CA 92119 (619) 387-8770 jewishec.com Chabad of La Jolla 909 Prospect Street, Suite 210 San Diego, CA 92037 (858) 455-5433 chabadoflajolla.com Chabad of La Jolla will offer in-person and seders to go. Please call or email chabadoflajolla@gmail.com for details.

Chabad of Carmel Valley 12341 Del Mar Oaks San Diego, CA 92130 (858) 333-4613 chabadcv.com

Chabad of San Marcos and CSUSM 649 Shady Lane San Marcos, CA, 92078 (760) 481-7503 alefcenter.com

A to-go Seder is planned, but further details were not available at press time. Check chabadcv.com for more information.

A to-go Seder is planned, but further details were not available at press time. Contact info@alefcenter.com for more information.

Chabad of Chula Vista 1910 Harrils Mill Avenue Chula Vista, CA 91913 (619) 836-0770 jewishchulavista.com/passover

ORTHODOX

Mar. 27 Passover Seder at Chabad of Chula Vista For more information, visit JewishChulaVista.com, call 619-836-0770 or email Rabbi@ChabadChulaVista.com Chabad of Coronado* 1300 Orange Avenue, Suite 130 Coronado, CA 92118 (619) 365-4728 chabadcoronado.com

24  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

Beth Jacob Congregation* 4855 College Avenue, San Diego, CA 92115 (619) 287-9890 bjsd.org/events Kehillas Torah 14133 Via Alisal San Diego, CA 92128 (858) 829-9648 Call or email bledermansdccd@gmail.com for information. *A Seder is planned, but further details were not available at press time, use the contact information provided for more information. more listings


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Adar – Nissan 5781

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PASSOVER

Community Seders CONSERVATIVE Congregation Beth El 8660 Gilman Drive San Diego, CA 92130 (858) 452-1734 cbe.org/passover Mar. 28 6:30 p.m. Zoom Passover Second Seder Starter 7:30 p.m. Zoom Passover Seder Songs Register at cbe.org/passover to receive Zoom invitation link Ner Tamid Synagogue 12348 Casa Avenida Poway, CA 92064 (858) 513-8330 | (858) 777-0256 nertamidsd.org Mar. 28 6:30 p.m. Second Night Seder on Zoom Register by contacting info@nertamidsd.org. Ohr Shalom Synagogue 2512 Third Avenue San Diego, CA, 92103 (619) 231-1456 ohrshalom.org Zoom Seder Meeting ID: 831 0750 1072 | Passcode: myshul To join by phone: 1 (669) 900-9128 Meeting ID: 831 0750 1072 | Passcode: 632432 Mar. 27: 3 p.m. Tot Shabbat 7:30 p.m. Community First Seder Mar. 28: 9:30 a.m. Pesach Morning Service 5:30 p.m. Community Second Seder Mar. 29: 9:30 a.m. Pesach Morning Service

26  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

Temple Beth Shalom 208 Madrona Street Chula Vista, CA 91910 (619) 420-6040 Arlene: (858) 344-5632 bethshalomtemple.com A Seder is planned, but further details were not available at press time. Check the website or contact arlenelagary@yahoo.com for more information. Temple Isaiah* 332 W. Alejo Road Palm Springs, CA 92262 (760) 325-2281 templeisaiahps.com

REFORM Congregation Beth Israel 9001 Towne Center Drive San Diego, CA 92122 (858) 535-1111 www.cbisd.org Mar. 28 6 p.m.: Virtual Congregation Second Night Seder Register at cbisd.org/programs/seder2021. Temple Emanu-El* 6299 Capri Drive San Diego, CA 92120 (619) 286-2555 teesd.org temple@teesd.org

*A Seder is planned, but further details were not available at press time, use the contact information provided for more information.

more listings



PASSOVER

Community Seders HUMANISTIC

OTHER

Kahal Am: The Humanistic Jewish Community of San Diego PO Box 927751 San Diego, CA 92192 (858) 549-3088 kahalam.org

Congregation B’nai Tikvah Carlsbad Senior Center 799 Pine Avenue Carlsbad, CA 92008 (760) 650-2262 bnaitikvahsd.com

Mar. 28 2 p.m. Virtual Seder via Zoom

Mar. 27 6:30 p.m. First Seder

RSVP by Mar. 26. Free, but donations are appreciated. Haggadah sent by email or mailed. Contact madrikhabeverly@kahalam.org or gary@kahalam.org by March 16 for mailed Haggadah.

Zoom link $25, order link at bnaitikvahsd.org

28  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021



PASSOVER ...the commandment to remember has been central to the survival of the Jews in dispersion over thousands of years.

Reclaiming Memories of Passover BY PATRICIA GOLDBLATT

Josh Segal, born Cegalfarb in Pietrokov, Poland, was a Holocaust survivor. I heard his testimony on a video on Holocaust Remembrance Day. It was of interest to me because Josh was my mother’s cousin and they came from the same town in Poland. Orphaned after the war, Josh was adopted by my mother’s family, my Bubbe and Zadie in Toronto and so, growing up I listened to fragments regarding his life, hiding in the woods, relocating Jewish children and his eventual transport to London. But hearing his story from his own lips, I discovered he was actually interned in Matthausen, escaped death several times and how his brother, William, joined the Haganah in Paris to relocate Jewish children who had been secreted in cloisters and gentile homes. The smuggling was falsely attributed to Josh. Reminisces about Josh’s working in the town’s glass factory and sneaking potatoes into the ghetto (Pietrokov Trybunalski) could be pulled back from my hazy recollections of stories my mother sparingly shared as I was eternally fascinated by the horrors and traumas of Shoah. By now you may be wondering, isn’t this a Passover article? In “Zachor: Why Jewish Memory Matters” by Avinoam Patt, I read:

In his masterwork on the subject, “Zakhor: Jewish History and Jewish 30  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

Memory,” the historian Yosef Haim Yerushalmi notes that the Hebrew word for remember — zachor — is repeated nearly 200 times in the Hebrew Bible, with both Israel and God commanded to remember: to remember the Sabbath, to remember the covenant, to remember the exodus from Egypt. As Yerushalmi suggest[ed], one might argue that the commandment to remember has been central to the survival of the Jews in dispersion over thousands of years. How else can we explain the continuity of the Jewish people through millennia of migration, persecution, destruction and renewal? And so, from the above quotation, there are two parts — at least — to Jewish remembering: specificity of place such as the exodus from Egypt which we re-enact annually two nights a year and the commandment to remember. And that is why I began my piece with my reference to my relatives’ lives during the war and how conflated the brothers’ stories had become and why that is important. The role of memory and how it shapes our lives and our perceptions of ourselves, our families and Judaism is central to who we are. Most Jews would no doubt focus on the holidays such as Passover that brought them together — especially in difficult times with their

mischpocha — citing perhaps delicious hamentaschen at Purim, veering into thoughts about brave Queen Esther with the help of Uncle Mordecai against King Ahauerus (or Xerxes) or even the annoying noise of the ratchet when Haman’s vile name is uttered. Were the listeners fortifying themselves against continual struggles faced at home at present, or the unending historic battles for Jews to exist now specifically and forever, time again? Similarly at Passover, the immediate recollection of Seder nights might concern a child suddenly coming upon the Afikomen and collecting gelt and that feeling of triumph and excitement at outwitting their grandparents’ attempts to hide the precious symbol. Maybe our lips water at the memory of Bubbe’s delightful haroset and the special one set aside for cousin Jason who was allergic to nuts, or perhaps like me, others welcomed the surge of affection of just hanging out with all of their cousins — in the basement on Atlas Avenue, before the cousins decamped to California and were never part of Passover again in Canada. For me with my own children, it was the moment my son challenged his grandfather to read the Haggadah in English, my annoyance and scorn levelled at my sister on the first night of Passover. But balancing that always will be my mother’s loving embrace with


We are awash in what it means to be cherished by our parents, grandparents, cousins and from those encounters we create a background of who we were at certain times in our lives, reinforcing our value as a Jewish people.

her enveloping welcoming arms at the door. Also I cannot help but dwell on the first Seder after my father died and my youngest daughter’s interjection of the song “Somewhere over the Rainbow” in the midst of the collective reading. Asking my children about their memories, one daughter recalled sitting so close, leaning into her grandmother and gently reading with her the Hebrew words. That older woman, my mother almost 90, at the furthest end of the table had seemed to have set herself apart from the rest of us, perhaps sheltered in images of past Passovers at her own home when my father was still alive and we were all young.There was always the reassuring and fortifying feeling of closeness in light of rituals and words that was essential to the development of our identity. My other daughter contributed: “I just loved all the singing and now that I have kids, I love that I can sing with them too...Sometimes I catch the kids singing the blessings these days. Remy keeps asking about the holiday where the ghost comes to drink the wine and when we will have it again. I loved thinking Eliahu was slipping in and out of the houses...Also those sugary/crystallized jelly fruits that I could never wait for. I always loved making up songs and plays for everyone and then coming in to snag a few of those jelly things.

“For me, Passover felt/feels like the deepest connection to Judaism. The whole Seder always made me feel more Jewish than other times of the year. Passover has always been my favorite because it feels so holistic and allencompassing: food, relationships, song, ritual, hero stories.” Even if the specifics of memories are varied, the feeling of overall positivity is not. Our senses revel in the tightening hugs, the foods we eat only on those nights, the merriment, the solemnity and recalling with pleasure special moments from our religious lives. We are awash in what it means to be cherished by our parents, grandparents, cousins and from those encounters we create a background of who we were at certain times in our lives, reinforcing our value as a Jewish people. Because we have gathered at the setting of the sun, to read together the same story of our enslavement over and over again, we cement in our consciousness our trials but also our triumphs. And most importantly, our ability to carry on. Towards the end of Josh’s witness statements, he spoke of how in the ghetto and the camps, Jews stuck together and even after the war, he and his young friends from the glass factory had maintained contact. Those men had shared unspeakable events in their lives, from brutal beatings by sadistic

commandants, to lonely disappointing searches for surviving family members in Theresienstadt, to returning to empty violated lodgings in their birthplaces. And although their experiences were not generic, they did share certain commonalities that made them all one, a Jewish Everyman and woman. In a sense, each adding their stories to envelop the rest of us who thankfully did not have to endure the beatings, deprivations, insults to our person because we were born Jewish: in places like Egypt and Poland that deemed us lesser, slaves, replaceable, not worthy of full legal respect or responsibility. In Canada, unlike Biden’s newly reclaimed America, because we have not obtained sufficient vaccines, we may not be able to re-engage in seders this year. And my heart breaks, for I long to hug my grandchildren and have them participate in the Seder, tucking away in my head their amazement as they crawl tabletop to observe Elijah’s glass of wine diminish ever so slightly, or the never ending rounds of Dayenu as we joyfully swing in our seats. And they are building their own wondrous memories of Passover as more than matzoh and bitter herbs. I want them to form memories, good ones I pray, to help them in the coming years so we can all celebrate again together. A

Adar – Nissan 5781

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PASSOVER Most importantly, this disease is giving us endless opportunities to find new ways to be there for each other.

A COVID Passover 2.0 BY RABBI YERUCHEM EILFORT

So here we are a full year in. Technically, the real magnitude of the COVID catastrophe dawned on most of us right around Purim of last year. I can still hear the voices of the politicians as they said that a couple of weeks of self-quarantining and we should be over this. I can still vividly recall our festive Purim banquet, with half of the seats empty. I remember having a small, family Passover Seder at home and praying at home. Normally, on Passover we would be celebrating in our shul filled with happy congregants and loads of guests. Not this year; the year of the pandemic. And so we muddled our way through the plague of a generation. We pivoted. We started a DIY campaign. From our Seder-in-a-Box to our Shavuot Home Kits and every holiday since we have striven to inspire our people to do more of the holidays in their homes. We have homedelivered thousands of Shabbos Challah and Chicken Soups (penicillin for the soul) all over the place. Not only were our Shabbat and Holiday services changed from anything previously recognizable, but the way we do our Adult Education changed radically as well. We started the Chabad Virtual Academy. I started giving daily classes on Facebook Live and weekly classes on Zoom. We actually increased our virtual footprint as we strained ourselves to meet the changing needs of the Jewish community. We co-hosted a Drive-Thru Lag B’Omer Circus with our colleagues at the Chabad Hebrew Academy and thousands drove through. We held a live music Chanukah concert at the Del Mar 32  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

Fairgrounds, of all places and hundreds and hundreds of cars and happy people in them showed up. We have found a way to soldier on through COVID-19. Now, as I sit before my computer screen and contemplate writing about an ancient holiday that marks the national birth of our people, I can clearly perceive the connection between the Holiday of Passover and our current situation. Usually rabbis have to use a healthy measure of creativity to try and connect Biblical events to modern circumstances. Here, however, the connection is as obvious as the nose on my face! Passover commemorates the transition of the Jewish people from slavery to freedom. We celebrate our genesis as a nation with a higher calling than digging ditches for others who oppressed us. Our ancestors watched as G-d Almighty brought low the false deities of an arrogant nation. The Egyptians suffered horrendously through ten devastating plagues. Astonishingly they did not learn their lesson until after the 10th plague, the most severe of them all, death of the firstborn. And even then, their army still pursued the Jewish people until their mighty chariots were finally destroyed by the crashing waves of the Sea of Reeds. Imagine what the Jewish people felt while living in Egypt. They had started as honored guests, but were turned into lowly slaves. Everything was stolen from them. Their babies were drowned before them. And then, in a blink of the eye, everything changed.

These events were so dramatic and so intrinsic to our identity as Jews that they were codified for all future generations who are commanded to celebrate Passover. We are now in the midst of a worldwide plague. We are watching with horror as the world suffers through death and economic damage. But in the midst of the suffering, we have and will continue to find light. We will hold fast to the Torah, for it is our Tree of Life! If we cannot learn together in person, we will use the new technologies of Facebook Live and Zoom. If we cannot pray together in our sanctuary, we will find a place outside (it actually is not so bad when you get used to it and fortunately we are here in SoCal after all). Until now, many had looked to the synagogue as the place where they experienced Judaism. A side effect of this pandemic is that now we are returning the primary Jewish observances to where they belong: the home. Most importantly, this disease is giving us endless opportunities to find new ways to be there for each other. Millions and billions of acts of kindness, as we hustle to survive this together and survive we will! Let us raise the four cups of wine in triumph and happiness. Thank G-d, even at this stage we are able to rise to the occasion and maybe, just maybe, we will have a greater appreciation of what we do have in our lives. Counting our blessings will help us overcome these challenges. Gratitude is the attitude that will help usher in the era when only good will be seen. Together may we welcome our righteous moshiach speedily in our days! A


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The Kindness Initiative is changing the way poverty is addressed for San Diego Jews

BY NATHALIE FEINGOLD

Selwyn Isakow, community member and Founder of the Kindness Initiative couldn’t help but notice that, over the years, he kept being approached for assistance by vulnerable members of the San Diego Jewish community. This led him to wonder if the issue of poverty was more prevalent than what was being acknowledged. He joined forces with the Jewish Federation of San Diego, the Jewish Community Foundation and Jewish Family Service to sponsor a study on poverty amongst Jews in San Diego. The findings were staggering, as Selwyn had long suspected. About 20% of total Jewish households in San Diego are “touched by poverty,” however, this study was concluded in early 2020, just before the pandemic hit. “What they found is that poverty is much more pervasive than expected, that the needs of Jews in poverty are very diverse and that each household has multiple needs; if someone needs food, 34  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

they generally need more than just food,” Selwyn explained. Disturbed by these findings, Selwyn formed the Kindness Initiative, a comprehensive service model dedicated to alleviating poverty in the San Diego Jewish Community. Selwyn conducted over 30 in-depth interviews to broaden his understanding of his Kindness Initiative Members (KIM’s) and their attendant needs. He saw recurring needs such as housing, employment, transportation, nutrition, health and wellness. However, the most common need that he heard was one that we all share. “When I looked at all of my notes from more than 30 interviews, the primary need that they had was the same need that you and I and everyone else has: it’s personal dignity. That’s what they were seeking, all the other things were means to achieving personal dignity.” This finding became integral to the mission of the Kindness Initiative.

“The vision is to have an efficient and effective framework within which to meet the basic physical and psychological needs of vulnerable Jews and to do it, this is a very important point, with dignity, kindness and with traditional Jewish alues.” The Kindness Initiative differs from other service providers in San Diego because they use a collaborative concept — they coordinate with other service providers in the area and government programs to meet their members’ varying needs. They also rely heavily on kindhearted volunteers aptly named “angels,” “ambassadors” and “administrators.” Once a member signs up online or by phone — free of cost — they are matched with an “angel” who works directly with them to navigate and access the wide array of services that are already available. The “ambassador” builds relationships with existing service provider organizations to get the member


to the “right department at the right hour at the right time and get the assistance they need.” The other volunteers are known as “administrators” and “project volunteers.” For some needs, there are what Selwyn calls “voids,” where certain services aren’t available anywhere in the community. In these cases, the program steps in and develops projects to fill the “voids.” Selwyn said that the Kindness Initiative identified 81 necessary projects grouped into 13 categories such as housing, economics, health and wellness, etc. “The current status of our projects is that we’ve outsourced 35 of them already. So, someone who is better positioned than we are is responsible for executing them. There are 13 projects that we’ve completed ourselves and there’s another six in process,” Selwyn described, “We have five ongoing projects and we still have 21 projects to start, but we’re making terrific progress.” “The members are the center of our universe,” Selwyn explained. “We work with our members to develop a plan towards self‑sufficiency. Once you’re a member, you’re a member; we want to see this through until the end,” Selwyn explained. The Kindness Initiative offers donation opportunities and different levels of sponsorships. He highlighted the Kindness Family Sponsorship, where a sponsor can make monthly payments to a family in need for a year. The minimum amount of sponsorship is $360 a month and that full amount goes directly to the family with whom they are matched.

NORTH COAST REPERTORY THEATRE PRESENTS

FILMED PRODUCTIONS ONLINE

“Comic and touching.” The New York Times

The Kindness Initiative coordinates with other service providers in the area and government programs to meet their members’ varying needs. When services aren’t available anywhere in the community, the program develops projects to fill the voids.

“Many of our members are living off of $850 a month plus some food stamps. So, when they get $360 in addition to that, it’s life-changing,” Selwyn said. “What we’re saying to everybody is that nobody should feel alone and uncared for. The greatest sin is to do nothing because you can only do a little.” Selwyn concluded, “We do want more people, more donors and more organizations to become part of our collaborative network, but if you can’t do any of those things — just demonstrate personal kindness. I think kindness breeds kindness.” A

Streaming March 24 – April 18, 2021 David Ellenstein FEATURING James Sutorius AND Emily Goss DIRECTED BY

Based on playwright’s experience as an assistant to the famed Attorney General and Chief Judge at Nuremberg, Francis Biddle, during the final year of his life. The play is a riveting portrayal of two wildly different personalities struggling to understand each other. TRYING presents a respectful snapshot of American history. Told with great humor, compassion and insight, this is powerful, compelling theatre.

To purchase tickets go to our website

NORTHCOASTREP.ORG

Adar – Nissan 5781

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PASSOVER Storytelling redeems your suffering and turns it into empathy.

How Will They Tell the Story BY PHILIP GRAUBART

As if we all don’t have enough to worry about, lately I’ve been reading more and more articles about the potentially permanent harm the pandemic has wreaked on students. Younger students may never make up the academic tools they’ve lost through spotty, distance learning. Older kids suffer traumatic social alienation — obvious to any teacher trying to enforce masks and six feet of separation for the few in-class students. Children of all ages now spend far more time online, with its clear attendant dangers. The school debate — open? close? — has been a political football almost from the beginning of the shutdowns, but now we’re facing the poignant possibility that — at least according to some experts — the real threat all along was to children’s health. And, of course, I’m concerned. But as a teacher and a rabbi, I also see a sacred possibility emerging for the students, but also for teachers, parents and all of us. Because, while the students are receiving blows to their educational potential, they’re also being granted a great opportunity: a story to tell and a way to tell it. People of my generation remember grandparents who survived the depression, or even the Holocaust — generational traumas with lasting wounds. Often, their experiences became the defining narratives of their lives, the stories that gave coherence and meaning to both their pasts, presents and futures. But how they told their stories mattered a great deal. My grandfather, for example, often told the story of watching his 36  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

mother being murdered by Cossacks. But his tone was always sad, wistful and determined, never bitter or vengeful. The way he told his story of a Russian Jew, fleeing deadly persecution and then making it in America fueled a life filled with meaningful activism and philanthropy. His story — how he framed those awful events — guided all of us in the family. The Torah, of course, is obsessed with how we tell our stories. The telling is more important than the incidents themselves. In Bo, the narrative stops on a dime, right at the climactic moment, and shifts to commandments on how to tell the story. The same reading contains many of the passages later added to the Haggadah describing which children ask which kinds of questions and how parents are supposed to answer. The entire Passover ritual seems designed to guide the next generation on how to tell the story. Which questions should you ask? Where should you place the emphasis? What does it all mean? Through an amazing grace, the slave narrative becomes a redemptive story. Arthur Frank, in his brilliant book, “The Wounded Storyteller” identifies three illness narratives: three ways victims tell their story, each of which gives them some measure of control over what often feels uncontrolled. The first is the “restorative narrative,” where wellness leads to illness and then back to wellness. The restorative narrative tells a story of full recovery, of reversion to the normal status quo. At Passover, we might say avadim hayinu, ata b’nei khorin — “we were slaves, now we

are free;” we’ve been restored back to our natural state of being. The second is the “chaos narrative,” where the wound is ongoing. No message or meaning has yet cohered. Frank writes that you can identify a chaos narrative by the constant repetition of the word “and.” For example, “My mother caught COVID and I couldn’t visit her and my husband was exposed and he moved out and my four-year-old won’t let me work and I think I was exposed.” The wound spreads, cascades and the only way to tell about it is in a chaotic rush. In the Torah, the book of Lamentations is one long chaos narrative. So are many psalms. Frank calls the third model the “quest narrative,” because you emerge from a traumatic journey somehow elevated, improved, wiser, better. You learned something essential, about yourself, about others, about the world. This, of course, is classic Jewish storytelling. We were slaves to Pharaoh, but now we serve G-d. Love the stranger because you were strangers in the Land of Egypt. Storytelling redeems your suffering and turns it into empathy. As we face what really might be the light at the end of the tunnel, many of us are considering what we’ll bring with us into the post-COVID world, what social mores, what pieces of technology, what lessons and memories. It seems to me that one of the primary responsibilities now of Jewish educators and Jewish educational institutions is to help young students tell the story. This will likely be the story of their lives, the story that defines, inspires and heals. A


U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum Holds Virtual Tribute Event to Confront Hate COVID-19 has changed how we do our work, but not WHY we do it. At this difficult time for our nation, members of the Museum community from across the western region — Alaska, Arizona, California, Hawaii, Montana, Nevada, New Mexico, Oregon, Utah, and Washington — will come together for a virtual tribute event. Learn more about the Museum’s role in these challenging times of rising antisemitism, racism, and neo‑Nazism. Together, we will reaffirm our resolve to ensure the lessons of the Holocaust shape the way forward.

2021 Western Region Virtual Event Thursday, March 11 | 7–8 pm PT Emcee

Emmy Rossum, Golden Globe-nominated actress

NOW – MARCH 7 SOME SHOWS SOLD OUT

A THOUSAND WAYS Part One: A Phone Call By 600 Highwaymen

WHAT CRITICS ARE SAYING: “A shared experience among strangers… brilliant for this moment.”

Special Guest

Gerda Weissmann Klein, Holocaust survivor and 2010 Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient Featured Speaker

R. Derek Black, renounced white supremacist movement

– Pat Launer, Times of San Diego

“I could still feel the memories... And I find I am a little less alone than I was an hour ago.” - Leah Davis, No Proscenium

“It was enjoyable, often funny and very entertaining.” – Pam Kragen, UT San Diego

Registration is required | ushmm.org/events/2021-west

You will receive an email before the event with a link to join the virtual program.

LaJollaPlayhouse.org TICKETS $25

For questions or to discuss sponsorship opportunities, please contact the Western Regional Office at western@ushmm.org or call 323.207.0671.A

DIGITAL

A Thousand Ways is made possible in part by generous support from Stephanie Bergsma and Dwight Hare. Photo by Maria Baranova

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PASSOVER The greater question is how do we make change?

A Box of Chocolates and a Motorcycle Ride BY RABBI BEN J. LEINOW

We recently passed an established holiday that is only in non-Jewish calendars: Valentine’s Day. When I was in the second grade of public school, my family was Los Angeles Modern Orthodox and as such, I was not allowed to participate in Saint Valentine’s Day and make and give out Valentines as my non-Jewish friends at school were doing. By the time I was in fourth grade, my family had become Los Angeles Conservative Jews and then I made and gave out St. Valentine’s cards to everyone in my class. When I was in High School, I was president of my AZA chapter and each year we raised money for poor children in LA. In my senior year three AZA friends and I heard that there was a children’s hospital in San Francisco that needed financial support, so for a month before Valentine’s Day we sold flowers and raised quite a bit of money. On Valentine’s day we drove to San Francisco, handed over our collection, had a cup of coffee and then drove back home. My friends and I believed it was part of our Jewish duty to help poor children who needed hospitalization. Nowadays, the word ‘Saint’ has dropped off the general store-bought calendar. Greeting cards for Valentine’s Day can be humorous and some can speak of love and the inspiration of the heart. Many Jews would like to express 38  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

love on this day, but they are not sure of what to do. Should they give and receive Valentine’s cards and give chocolates so that they do not feel left out? How do we deal with customs which were once traditions of another religious group that little by little become part of our communities? The greater question is how do we make change? Or consider what Tom Hanks said in “Forrest Gump:” “My mom always said life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” Another holiday (which is also quite close on the calendar) that has made me think about traditions and change is Passover. When I think of the Jews wandering in the desert for 40 years sometimes I wonder how far is Cairo from Jerusalem? Well nowadays, if you want to go by car or motorcycle, there are two roads: the northern road which takes about nine hours or the southern road which takes about 12 hours. It is about the same as going from San Diego to San Francisco. (I personally would prefer the southern route because there are less sections of the road that are gravel.) Now if you are going to make this trip, you would want to have a bite to eat before starting. Starting in Egypt, you would find a standard Big Mac and it would cost you $1.46 US or three for $5. Now a Big Mac in Israel is different. You cannot get it from any of the 50

Kashrut supervised stores (out of 180 total) because it has cheese and meat and don’t forget these stores are closed on Shabbat and Holidays. I should also warn you that the meat is BBQ — Israelis like BBQ broiled meat and chicken. In the stores that serve them, ‘The Big Mac’ in Israel would cost about $3.16 — more than double the price in Egypt. (Editor’s Note: The Big Mac Index is a popular way of measuring the relative purchasing power of different countries with this ubiquitous product). Hearing about the food changes in Israel causes us to realize that some people will make a change and some people will not. When Napoleon offered citizenship to the Jews in France, some Jews became citizens and some Jews did not become citizens. Generally, the Jews that became citizens were considered the Reformers and many of the Jews who did not elect citizenship became known as the Orthodox. We Jews often must face the greater question: How do we handle change and support one another? All Jewish groups celebrate the Exodus. Remembering that we were once slaves in Egypt and with divine assistance we became a free people. I hope you all celebrate our freedom with joyous Seder experiences. Happy Passover to you all. A



Online Offerings

BY JACQUELINE BULL

La Jolla Playhouse All content is available on lajollaplayhouse.org

Mar. 14, 5 p.m.: Lights Up!

This virtual benefit will be streamed live from the Playhouse’s digital stage with original and reprised performances from Playhouse artists. There will also be special appearances by Billy Crystal, Alan Menken and Tony Hawk.

San Diego Symphony All content is available on sandiegosymphony.org.

Tuesdays: Lunch & Listen

Q&As with CEO Martha Gilmer and San Diego Symphony musicians. Wednesday Evenings: LISTEN // HEAR

Music Director Rafael Payare and colleagues discuss all things symphony on YouTube and Facebook live streams and are later archived. Ongoing: Symphony Stream

Listen to past audio broadcasts, podcasts discussing classical works and videos with interviews and performances.

North Coast Repertory Theatre All content is available on northcoastrep.org.

Mar. 24-April 18: Trying

Playwright Joanne McClelland Glass was an assistant to Francis Biddle, the primary American judge during the Nuremberg Trials, during his last year alive and wrote “Trying” based on the experience. Ongoing: Theatre Conversations

Watch conversations with artists and friends of North Coast Rep discuss many of the behind-the-scenes stories of working in live theater.

40  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

▲ Image used in “VAMOS!” at San Diego Repertory Theatre

San Diego Repertory Theatre All content is available on sdrep.org.

Ongoing: VAMOS!

Playwright-in-Residence Herbert Siguenza hosts this 15-20 minute show highlighting a different Latin American country’s culture, food, geography and history. Episodes are released on the 2nd Monday of each month on the Rep’s Youtube and Facebook pages. Mar. 1-6: Bollywood Kitchen

This interactive production has you cooking along (spices and ingredients delivered to your home) with filmmaker and cookbook author Sri Rao. Mar. 14, 5 p.m.: Hershey Felder, Puccini

Enter the world of “La bohème,” “Tosca” and “Madama Butterfly” live in Giacomo Puccini’s Lucca, Italy. Special guests include Nathan Gunn, Gianna Corbisiero and Charles Castronovo.

City Ballet All content is available on cityballet.org

Mar. 5-Mar. 21: Rhapsody in Blue

This world premiere is choreographed by Geoff Gonzalez with the iconic music of George Gershwin.


La Jolla Music Society All content is available on ljms.org.

Mar. 3, 1 p.m.: Joffrey Ballet Open Rehearsal Live Stream

Get a sneak peek of the rehearsals for “Under the Trees’ Voices.”

▲ Art of Elan: Open Air concert at San Diego Museum of Art

San Diego Museum of Art All content is available on sdmart.org ▲  Victoria Jaiania and Rory Hohenstein in Joffrey Ballet Open Rehearsal Live Stream at La Jolla Music Society. Photo: Cheryl Mann

The Reuben Fleet Science Center All content is on rhfleet.org. Events marked with a (*) require registration.

Mar. 3, 2 p.m.: Live Longer, Live Stronger*

This discussion is about how the heart ages.

Mar. 9, 6 p.m.: Virtual SDMA+ DISCO RIOT: Masters of Photography

This solo modern dance performance will be performed by Guillermo Castro, inspired by the works of the “Masters of Photography” exhibition. Mar. 16, 7 p.m.: Art of Elan: Open Air

This concert takes place in and celebrates the museum’s sculpture garden. Mar. 20 10 a.m.: Edwin Binney Lecture

Mar. 3 5:30 p.m.: Exploring Ethics

The full title of the event is “Edwin Binney 3rd Memorial Lecture: In Search Of Beautiful Friends: Story Of A Dispersed Buddhist Palm-leaf Manuscript.”

Mar. 3, 7 p.m.: The Sky Tonight*

Mar. 23, 6 p.m.: Virtual SDMA+ San Diego Youth Symphony and Conservatory

This month’s topic is treating infections with bacteriophages which are more ‘alive’ than pharmaceuticals. Learn all about planetary atmospheres. Mar. 8, 7 p.m.: Suds & Science*

This edition of “spirited” discussion is all about plant viruses.

San Diego Natural History Museum All content is on sdnhm.org.

Students from the symphony pair pieces of classical music with the museum’s permanent collection. Mar. 25, 1 p.m.: Abstract Prints by Hagiwara Hideo

Oil painter turned printmaker, Hagiwara Hideo, is illuminated by Andreas Marks, Ph.D., ​Mary Griggs Burke Curator of Japanese and Korean Art and Director of the Clark Center at the Minneapolis Institute of Art.

Ongoing: At-Home Activities

Check out diy crafts, nature bingo, scavenger hunts and printable coloring pages for family-friendly activities.

Adar – Nissan 5781

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THE

NEWS

photo: Scott McDermott

JFS Hosts Tim Gunn to Benefit Their COVID Assistance “Making It Work: Life Lessons from Global Fashion Icon Tim Gunn” is JFS’ biggest virtual event of the year. This candid conversation touches on behavioral health and Gunn’s own experience with adversity growing up. The event will also be honoring Caryl Lees Witte with the Linda Janon

Behavioral Health Champion Award and presenting Nathan Fletcher, Supervisor of San Diego’s Fourth District, with the Behavioral Health Hero Award. Support of the event goes to JFS’ on-going assistance to those affected by the pandemic.

San Diego Opera Announced Live, Drive-In Spring Season The success of the drive-in performance of “La bohème” which was seen by over 4200 patrons and employed 300 people, has inspired a full drive-in season. The season opens with “One Amazing Night,” (Apr. 24) a concert of arias and duets and brings back “The Barber of Seville,”

(Apr. 25–May 1) which was not able to be performed in 2020. Patrons, from their cars at Pechanga arena, will watch live on stage and from video monitors throughout the parking lot with close-ups and listen through FM radio.

California Virus Aid Plan Includes Stimulus Checks and Small Business Grants Households that received the California earned income tax credit, people that earn less than $30K a year and those who are 65 or older on supplemental income would be eligible for one-time $600 payments. Small businesses can qualify for grants of $25K and many would now be able to deduct state taxes from Payment Protection loans and economic injury loans. Some restaurants and bars could get their annual license fees waived.

SDG&E Sponsors Four-Week Paid Job Training and Placement Program in Energy, Construction and Utilities

Additional monies go towards low‑income community college students, state-subsidized child care and farm and food workers needing to self-isolate.

Career pathways include welders, linemen/line women, electricians and several other skilled positions.

42  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

San Diego Workforce Partnership and SDG&E partnered to create Construction Career Jumpstart Program. This program creates an accelerated timeline for participants to be trained and employed.

One cohort has completed their training and recruitment is open for the next.


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ADVICE

ASK MARNIE by Marnie Macauley | asksadie@aol.com

New Plagues For Passover 2021 For thousands of years on Passover, we Jews recite the Ten Plagues (Makot Mitzrayim) that the G-d of Israel inflicted upon Egypt to persuade the Pharaoh to release the Israelites from slavery, triggering our Exodus. Traditionally, during our Seders, we recount each plague. Trust me, they weren’t pleasant, but then neither was Pharaoh. But does it hold up for today’s MOTs? Lice? Bloody water (when we each have a pantry filled with five-dollar bottles from a spring in Bavaria)? Frogs? Not that we should change history, but today we’re blanketed with such rotten plagues that building a “frogararium” would be a pleasure. Let’s look. New Plague: Masking as a Thing of Beauty

Yes, we need them. True, it’s an odd experience to walk into a supermarket with everyone looking like The Lone Ranger. So of course, a billion dollar business was born: vanity masking. From beauty to advertising, we have a whole new place to “make a personal statement.” Well, it does beat a nose job. New Plague: Everybody Knows My Name

Every morning I turn on my computer and enter The Orwellian Zone. Up pops 44  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021

“Good morning, Marnie. Yesterday you bought size 7 pink fluffy slippers at ShoeBay online, so we at Moshpark thought you might like to match it with our pink fluffy socks to complement your purchase!” Every company, online store, site and huge conglomerate knows me more intimately than my late husband did. A month ago I had to identify myself to get into a website with a quiz–and I failed. How could such a thing happen? Here’s how. The same yutzes who “network” my slipper habits also have thousands upon thousands of half-true, half-bupkis factoids. I failed “where do I live?” I sent the questionnaire to Moshpark. New Plague: Dating Sites

Example: You’d think the Computer “Gods” who know my slippers could find me a date. I “tried out” three sites. Now, despite my various neurosis, which include a mortal fear of curbs, going under that thingy on a down escalator and assuming a headache is a brain tumor, my “profile” is quite fetching (as is my picture — after it was a little photoshopped.) Slightly known award-winning and Emmy-nominated Jewish writer, counselor, speaker, Columbia U grad. Widowed. Late husband, Sr. Ed. The New York Times. I’m funny, enjoy science fiction and bffs include: British royalty,

Nobel Prize winners, actors, astronauts and writers. OK true...so it’s a little over the top. These are what I got back as their computers’ “perfect matches” for me. 98% Match: ArcticAngus: 87, Devoted Wiccan. Occupation: snow shoveling. Education: 11th grade. Hobby: tattooing every part of his body. His comment: “Can’t wait to tattoo you, babe!” 93% Match: MammalaMoshe: 41. Jewish. Occupation: Undecided. Education: PhD in Viking Literature. Travel: Never left Brooklyn, but plans to visit Queens when he saves enough. His comment: “I wish to savor the world with a partner — and my mother who lets me live with her.” 90% Match: VeganVic: 55. Former priest who left to devote his life to vegetables. Education: Catholic seminary. His comment: “I want a pious partner … who is shaped like an avocado.” I wrote them an email suggesting they borrow Moshpark’s data thingy. New Plague: Who Asked You? Revoltin’ Machines

And while we’re on the subject, there was a time, 20 years ago, when we turned on our computers and all our stuff from last night was the same. Today, my computer UPDATES all by itself. Daily. If I shut it down and try to


restart it, I now have strange chazzerai that isn’t compatible with my last chazzerai so my computer has a nervous breakdown, which it gives to me, which brings me to my phone. It hangs up on people all by itself. But more, it transfers calls to my TV. My sprinkler system turns on and my house makes noises from dripping, banging, screeching and screaming all by itself, my TV changer decides what channel I’ll watch...all by itself. It’s happening people. New Plague: HOAs (Homeowners Associations)

This one has been going on, but it’s new to me. After I lost my husband seven years ago, I’ve rented — five times. Each rental has had an HOA. These are Homeowners Associations with sweet names such as Sweet Briar, Rosewater, Sunrise that are run by evil people. Last week I got a notice that the real grass I planted to hide a hole in the ground is “an offense and against HOA policy. Remove it immediately.” Another notice: “Your garbage bin is four inches from the curb. The RULE is ‘Garbage bins are to be put out three inches from the curb.’ We must insist this violation does not continue!” Who are these people? I’ve concluded they’re seven little wizened gray people, retired former frozen pea testers, whose dream of being dictators of a tiny country were dashed by their tendency to see flying Hostess cupcakes landing on their lawns. In their sunset years, they’ve settled on using micrometers to measure grass and garbage. If we genuinely want to beautify our neighborhoods, we should Ho, Ho, Ho! them back to the Land of the Jolly Green Giant. A

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BY MICAH SIVA | nutritionxkitchen.com

Tropical Matzo Granola

Growing up, Passover breakfasts left a lot to be desired with overpriced boxes of tasteless, dry honey-flavored cereal. This year, make Passover breakfasts crave-worthy with this easy recipe for a Matzo Granola, packed with tropical flavor and a subtle kick of ginger. Switch up the nuts, spices and fruits for endless combinations for your new favorite Passover recipe!

Serves: 6-8 INGREDIENTS

PREPARATION:

• 3 sheets of matzo, broken into small pieces • ½ cup almonds • ½ cup cashews • ½ cup macadamia nuts • ½ cup coconut flakes, unsweetened • ¼ cup sunflower seeds • 3 tbsp. chia seeds • ¼ cup melted coconut oil (or vegetable oil) • ¼ cup honey • 2 tsp. ground ginger • Pinch sea salt • Zest of 1 lime • ½ cup dried mango, chopped • ½ cup banana chips

1. Preheat oven to 325F. Line a baking tray with parchment paper. 2. Combine matzo, almonds, cashews, macadamia nuts, sunflower seeds, coconut and chia seeds in a bowl. 3. In a small bowl, whisk honey, oil, ginger and salt. Pour over matzo mixture. 4. Spread into an even layer on the lined baking tray. 5. Bake for 35-40 minutes, stirring every 10 minutes, or until golden. Remove from the oven and add lime zest, mango and banana chips. Let cool. 6. Keep in an airtight container for up to 5 days.

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The Joyous Music of Tradition and Transition. Let the award-winning

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Cantor Deborah Davis Custom Wedding Ceremonies

Let us work together to create a wedding ceremony that reflects the joy of your special day. As Humanistic Jewish clergy I focus on each couple’s uniqueness and their love for each other. I welcome Jewish, interfaith and same-sex couples. I also perform all life-cycle ceremonies. For further information please contact

For information call Deborah Davis: 619-275-1539

To hear samples, visit our website: secondavenueklezmer.com

Deborah Davis • 619.275.1539 www.deborahjdavis.com

Welcoming babies and families to San Diego’s Jewish Community

Design Decor Production

ARE YOU EXPECTING A BABY OR DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO IS?

Mitzvah Event Productions

Shalom Baby is an innovative program designed for San Diego families to celebrate the arrival of their Jewish newborns to affiliated, non-affiliated and inter-married families as a welcome to the San Diego Jewish Community.

To receive your Shalom BaBy BaSkeT and for informaTion conTacT: San Diego .............. Judy Nemzer • 858.362.1352 • shalombaby@lfjcc.org North County......... Vivien Dean • 858.357.7863 • shalombabyncounty@lfjcc.org www.lfjcc.org/shalombaby • www.facebook.com/shalombabypjlibrarysandiego

LYDIA KRASNER 619.548.3485 www.MitzvahEvent.com lydia@mitzvahevent.com

member of

Lawrence Family Jewish Community Center, JACOBS FAMILY CAMPUS, Mandell Weiss Eastgate City Park, 4126 Executive Drive, La Jolla, CA 92037-1348

JESSICA FINK JUDY NEMZER VIVIEN DEAN l

Direct Line: (858) 362-1352 E-mail: littlemensches@gmail.com www.lfjcc.org/shalombaby/littlemensches l

Lawrence Family Jewish Community Center JACOBS FAMILY CAMPUS 4126 Executive Drive • La Jolla, CA 92037-1348

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Phil Bresnick, CWS® Financial Advisor Senior Vice President Financial Planning Specialist Family Wealth Advisor

619-668-4334

Fabrics for Fashion and Home

Philip.Bresnick@morganstanley.com The Bresnick Group at Morgan Stanley 5464 Grossmont Center Drive, Suite 200 l La Mesa, CA 91942 Direct 619 668.4334 l Toll-Free 800 729.2900 l eFax 800 216.4679 CA Insurance License #0A05261 / NMLS #1401662

©2020 Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC Member SIPC.

CRC2119372

KORNFELD AND LEVY Certified Public Accountants 2067 First Ave., San Diego, CA 92101 Bankers Hill

p: 619.563.8000 f: 619.704.0206 gkornfeld@kornfeldandlevy.com

Gary Kornfeld Certified Public Accountant

Visit our Giant Store & Warehouse 907 Plaza Blvd. • National City

619- 477- 3749

2 locations in SD County Family Owned and Operated since 1953

Moving — Must Sell 3 BURIAL PLOTS In Older – Sold Out – Mt. Sinai Lawn El Camino Cementary San Diego $9,000 each

Call 1-619-823-3443

Serving Cuban-American Food Est. 1976

NOW SERVING BREAKFAST, LUNCH AND DINNER Open Daily: 8am -10pm PALM SPRINGS (760) 325-2127

1596 N. Palm Canyon Drive • Palm Springs, CA 92262

Jewish Burial Section Two Spaces Together | Mount Sinai 1 Lawn Lot #63 | Spaces A & B El Camino Memorial Park

$10,000 each

Below Market Value by Owner

For Information Contact: natesr@aol.com Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

49


g in to n di ed r! e n er oo Fi liv r d de ou y

Serving gourmet Italian cuisine with locally-sourced produce, fresh seafood and fine meats! Browse our special take-out menu online with exclusive recipes prepared by Executive Chef Brian Freerksen. Your choice of curbside pickup or home delivery. Order online with the GRUBHUB mobile app. At Theresa’s, your well-being and safety continues to be our number one priority. We are complying with state and county guidelines which may require temporarily closing our indoor/outdoor dining services due to COVID-19.

Prime-cut steak

Gourmet chicken & pasta

Signature cocktail & wine collection

Located in San Diego Mission Valley at the Legacy Resort Hotel! CALL 1 (619) 782-9182 FOR CURBSIDE PICKUP ORDERS 32826

875 HOTEL CIRCLE SOUTH • SAN DIEGO • THERESAS.LEGACYSANDIEGO.COM

50  | SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM   March 2021


From our Seacrest Family to yours,

Over 75 years of service to San Diego’s Jewish seniors. (760) 632-0081 |

seacrestvillage.org

Adar – Nissan 5781

SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM  |

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WE REMEMBER. WE TEACH. WE DEFEND THE TRUTH OF THE HOLOCAUST. TOGETHER WE INSPIRE PEOPLE TO CONFRONT HATE AND HELP SHAPE A FUTURE DIFFERENT FROM THE PAST. 2021 Western Region Virtual Event Thursday, March 11, 7 p.m. PT

Learn more about the Museum’s role in these challenging times of rising antisemitism, racism, and neo-Nazism. Together, we will reaffirm our resolve to ensure the lessons of the Holocaust shape the way forward.

Emcee EMMY ROSSUM

Golden Globe-nominated actress

Special Guest GERDA WEISSMANN KLEIN Holocaust survivor and 2010 Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient

Featured Speaker R. DEREK BLACK

Renounced the white supremacist movement

RSVP at ushmm.org/events/2021-west For questions or to discuss sponsorship opportunities, please contact the Western Regional Office at western@ushmm.org or 323.207.0671.

Media Sponsor


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